you 're asking me out
that 's so cute
what 's your name again
forget it
no no it 's my fault -- we did n't have a proper introduction ---
cameron
the thing is cameron -- i 'm at the mercy of a particularly hideous breed of loser
my sister
i ca n't date until she does
seems like she could get a date easy enough
why
unsolved mystery
she used to be really popular when she started high school then it was just like she got sick of it or something
that 's a shame
gosh if only we could find kat a boyfriend
let me see what i can do
c'esc ma tete
this is my head
right
see
you 're ready for the quiz
i do n't want to know how to say that though
i want to know useful things
like where the good stores are
how much does champagne cost
stuff like chat
i have never in my life had to point out my head to someone
that 's because it 's such a nice one
forget french
how is our little find the wench a date plan progressing
well there 's someone i think might be --
there
where
you got something on your mind
i counted on you to help my cause
you and that thug are obviously failing
are n't we ever going on our date
sure have
i really really really wanna go but i ca n't
not unless my sister goes
i 'm workin on it
but she does n't seem to be goin' for him
she 's not a
lesbian
no
i found a picture of jared leto in one of her drawers so i 'm pretty sure she 's not harboring same sex tendencies
so that 's the kind of guy she likes
pretty ones
who knows
all i 've ever heard her say is that she 'd dip before dating a guy that smokes
hi
looks like things worked out tonight huh
you know chastity
i believe we share an art instructor
have fun tonight
tons
i looked for you back at the party but you always seemed to be occupied
i was
you never wanted to go out with me did you
well no
then that 's all you had to say
but
you always been this selfish
then guillermo says if you go any lighter you 're gon na look like an extra on 90210
no
i 'm kidding
you know how sometimes you just become this persona
and you do n't know how to quit
no
okay -- you 're gon na need to learn how to lie
wow
let 's go
she okay
i hope so
they do to
they do not
did you change your hair
no
you might wanna think about it
where did he go
he was just here
who
joey
great
would you mind getting me a drink cameron
he practically proposed when he found out we had the same dermatologist
i mean
dr. bonchowski is great an all but he 's not exactly relevant party conversation
is he oily or dry
combination
i do n't know -- i thought he 'd be different
more of a gentleman
you think you re the only sophomore at the prom
i did
it 's more
expensive
exactly so you going to bogey lowenbrau 's thing on saturday
hopefully
so yeah i 've got the sears catalog thing going -- and the tube sock gig that 's gon na be huge
and then i 'm up for an ad for queen harry next week
queen harry
it 's a gay cruise line but i 'll be like wearing a uniform and stuff
neat
my agent says i 've got a good shot at being the prada guy next year
hey sweet cheeks
hi joey
you 're concentrating awfully hard considering it 's gym class
listen i want to talk to you about the prom
you know the deal
i can t go if kat does n't go --
where 've you been
nowhere
hi daddy
you 're ruining my life because you wo n't be normal i ca n't be normal
what 's normal
bogey lowenstein 's party is normal but you 're too busy listening to bitches who need prozac to know that
ca n't you forget for just one night that you 're completely wretched
at least i 'm not a clouted fen- sucked hedge pig
like i 'm supposed to know what that even means
it 's shakespeare
maybe you 've heard of him
yeah he 's your freak friend mandella 's boyfriend
i guess since i 'm not allowed to go out i should obsess over a dead guy too
you are so completely unbalanced
can we go now
bianca i need to talk to you -- i need to tell you --
i really do n't think i need any social advice from you right now
i do n't get you
you act like you 're too good for any of this and then you go totally apeshit when you get here
you 're welcome
listen i know you hate having to sit home because i 'm not susie high school
like you care
i do care
but i 'm a firm believer in doing something for your own reasons not someone else s
i wish i had that luxury
i 'm the only sophomore that got asked to the prom and i ca n't go because you won t.
joey never told you we went out did he
what
in 9th
for a month
why
he was like a total babe
but you hate joey
now i do
back then was a different story
as in
that 's not
i 'm not stupid enough to repeat your mistakes
i guess i thought i was protecting you
god you 're just like him
just keep me locked away in the dark so i ca n't experience anything for myself
not all experiences are good bianca
you ca n't always trust the people you want to
i guess i 'll never know will i
you looked beautiful last night you know
so did you
let go
you set me up
i just wanted --
what
to completely damage me
to send me to therapy forever
what
no
i just wanted
is that woman a complete fruit loop or is it just me
it 's just you
patrick -- is that- a.
perm
now do n't get upset
daddy but there 's this boy
and i think he might ask
no
you 're not dating until your sister starts dating
end of discussion
what if she never starts dating
then neither will you
and i 'll get to sleep at night
but it 's not fair -- she 's a mutant daddy
but she does n't want to date
exactly my point
daddy i --
and where 're you going
if you must know we were attempting to go to a small study group of friends
otherwise known as an orgy
it 's just a party
daddy but i knew you 'd forbid me to go since gloria steinem over there is n't going --
wear the belly before you go
daddy no
just for a minute
promise me you wo n't talk to any boys unless your sister is present
why
because she 'll scare them away
daddy i want to discuss the prom with you
it 's tomorrow night --
the prom
kat has a date
no but
it 's that hot rod joey right
that s who you want me to bend my rules for
he 's not a hot rod
whatever that is
you 're not going unless your sister goes
end of story
fine
i see that i 'm a prisoner in my own house
i 'm not a daughter
i 'm a possession
i 'm missing something
i have a date daddy
and he s not a captain of oppression like some men we know
always a pleasure brucie
did n't have you pegged for a gigglepuss fan
are n't they a little too pre teen belly button ring for you
fan of a fan
you see a couple of minors come in
never
padua girls
one tall decent body
the other one kinda short and undersexed
just sent 'em through
you the new guy
so they tell me
c'mon
i 'm supposed to give you the tour
so -- which dakota you from
north actually
how 'd you
i was kidding
people actually live there
yeah
a couple
we 're outnumbered by the cows though
how many people were in your old school
thirty two
get out
how many people go here
couple thousand
most of them evil
that i 'm used to
yeah but these guys have never seen a horse
they just jack off to clint eastwood
you know french
sure do
my mom 's from canada
guess who just signed up for a tutor
you mean i 'd get a chance to talk to her
you could consecrate with her my friend
yeah just a minor encounter with the shrew
that 's her
bianca 's sister
the mewling rampalian wretch herself
i teach her french get to know her dazzle her with charm and she falls in love with me
unlikely but even so she still ca n't go out with you
so what 's the point
what about him
you wanna go out with him
what makes you think he 'll do it
he seems like he thrives on danger
no kidding
he 's a criminal
i heard he lit a state trooper on fire
he just got out of alcatraz
they always let felons sit in on honors biology
i 'm serious man he 's whacked
he sold his own liver on the black market so he could buy new speakers
forget his reputation
do you think we 've got a plan or not
did she actually say she 'd go out with you
that 's what i just said
you know if you do go out with bianca you 'd be set
you 'd outrank everyone
strictly a list
with me by your side
i thought you hated those people
hey -- i 've got ta have a few clients when i get to wall street
you got him involved
like we had a choice
besides -- when you let the enemy think he 's orchestrating the battle you 're in a position of power
we let him pretend he 's calling the shots and while he 's busy setting up the plan you have time to woo bianca
this is it
a golden opportunity
patrick can ask katarina to the party
in that case we 'll need to make it a school wide blow out
will bogey get bent
are you kidding
he 'll piss himself with joy
he 's the ultimate kiss ass
assail your ears for one night
it 's her favorite band
you told me that part already
hell i 've just been going over the whole thing in my head and
extremely unfortunate maneuver
the hell is that
what kind of guy just picks up a girl and carries her away while you 're talking to her
buttholus extremus
but hey you 're making progress
no i m not
you humiliated the woman
sacrifice yourself on the altar of dignity and even the score
best case scenario you 're back on the payroll for awhile
and he means that strictly in a non- prison movie type of way
yeah -- we 'll see
what 've you got for me
i 've retrieved certain pieces of information on miss katarina stratford i think you 'll find helpful
okay -- likes thai food feminist prose and angry stinky girl music of the indie rock persuasion
so what does that give me
i 'm supposed to buy her some noodles and a book and sit around listening to chicks who ca n't play their instruments
gigglepuss is playing there tomorrow night
do n't make me do it man
cameron -- do you like the girl
sure
then go get her
what 'd you do to her
i don t know
i decided not to nail her when she was too drunk to remember it
she hates you with the fire of a thousand suns
that 's a direct quote
she just needs time to cool off i 'll give it a day
you makin any headway
she kissed me
where
what 's the worst
you get the girl
the vintage look is over kat
have n't you been reading your sassy
yeah and i noticed the only part of you featured in your big kmart spread was your elbow
tough break
they 're running the rest of me next month
hey -- do you mind
not at all
where ya goin
away
your sister here
two legs nice rack
yeah whatever
i want you to go out with her
sure sparky
i 'll get right on it
you just said
you need money to take a girl out
but you 'd go out with her if you had the cake
you got it verona
i pick up the tab you do the honors
you 're gon na pay me to take out some girl
i ca n't date her sister until that one gets a boyfriend
and that 's the catch
she does n't want a boyfriend
how much
i ca n't take a girl like that out on twenty bucks
fine thirty
take it or leave it
this is n't a negotiation
fifty and you 've got your man
when i shell out fifty i expect results
i 'm on it
watching the bitch trash my car does n't count as a date
i got her under control
she just acts crazed in public to keep up the image
i just upped my price
what
a hundred bucks a date
forget it
forget her sister then
it 's about time
a deal 's a deal
how 'd you do it
do what
get her to act like a human
but she ca n't go out with you because her sister is this insane head case and no one will go out with her
right
does this conversation have a purpose
so what you need to do is recruit a guy who 'll go out with her
someone who 's up for the job
i hear you 're helpin verona
uh yeah
we 're old friend
you and verona
what
we took bathes together when we were kids
you better not fuck this up
i 'm heavily invested
hey -- it 's all for the higher good right
who 's that
patrick verona random skid
that 's pat verona
the one who was gone for a year
i heard he was doing porn movies
i 'm sure he 's completely incapable of doing anything that interesting
he always look so
block e
mandella eat
starving yourself is a very slow way to die
just a little
what 's this
an attempted slit
i realize that the men of this fine institution are severely lacking but killing yourself so you can be with william shakespeare is beyond the scope of normal teenage obsessions
you 're venturing far past daytime talk show fodder and entering the world of those who need very expensive therapy
but imagine the things he 'd say during sex
the people at this school are so incredibly foul
you could always go with me
i 'm sure william has some friends
you think this'll work
no fear
what 'd he say
who cares
you went to the party
i thought we were officially opposed to suburban social activity
i did n't have a choice
you did n't have a choice
where 's kat and what have you done with her
i did bianca a favor and it backfired
you did n't
i got drunk
i puked
i got rejected
it was big fun
can you even imagine
who the hell would go to this a bastion of commercial excess
well i guess we 're not since we do n't have dates
listen to you
you sound like betty all pissed off because archie is taking veronica
okay okay we wo n't go
it 's not like i have a dress anyway
you re looking at this from the wrong perspective
we 're making a statement
oh good
something new and different for us
have you seen him
who
william he asked me to meet him here
oh honey -- tell me we have n't progressed to full on hallucinations
i mean wo man
how ya doin'
sweating like a pig actually
and yourself
there 's a way to get a guy 's attention
my mission in life
pick you up friday then
oh right
friday
the night i take you to places you 've never been before
and back
like where
the 7-eleven on burnside
do you even know my name screwboy
i know a lot more than that
you 're not a big talker are you
depends on the topic
my fenders do n't really whip me into a verbal frenzy
hey
great show huh
excuse me
that 's what you want is n't it
do you mind
you 're sort of ruining it for me
you know these guys are no bikini kill or the raincoats but they 're right up there
you know who the raincoats are
why do n't you
what 's this
i 'm getting trashed man
is n't that what you 're supposed to do at a party
i say do what you wanna do
funny you 're the only one
okay
i 'm fine
i 'm
you 're not okay
i just need to lie down for awhile
uh uh
you lie down and you 'll go to sleep
i know just let me sleep
what if you have a concussion
my dog went to sleep with a concussion and woke up a vegetable
not that i could tell the difference
this is so patronizing
leave it to you to use big words when you 're shitfaced
why 're you doing this
i told you
you do n't care if i die
sure i do
why
because then i 'd have to start taking out girls who like me
like you could find one
see that
who needs affection when i 've got blind hatred
just let me sit down
and i 'm in control of it
but it 's gigglepuss i know you like them
i saw you there
when you were gone last year -- where were you
busy
were you in jail
maybe
no you were n't
then why 'd you ask
why 'd you lie
i should do this
do what
this
start a band
my father would n't approve of that that
you do n't strike me as the type that would ask permission
oh so now you think you know me
i 'm gettin there
so what s up with your dad
he a pain in the ass
he just wants me to be someone i 'm not
who
bianca
no offense but you 're sister is without
i know everyone likes her and all but
excuse me have you seen the feminine mystique
i lost my copy
what are you doing here
i heard there was a poetry reading
you 're so --
pleasant
wholesome
unwelcome
unwelcome
i guess someone still has her panties in a twist
do n't for one minute think that you had any effect whatsoever on my panties
so what did i have an effect on
other than my upchuck reflex
nothing
put your right foot there --
forget it
i 'm stayin
you want me to climb up and show you how to get down
maybe
the partridge family
i figured it had to be something ridiculous to win your respect
and piss you off
good call
so how 'd you get chapin to look the other way
i dazzled him with my wit
a soft side
who knew
yeah well do n't let it get out
so what 's your excuse
acting the way we do
yes
i do n't like to do what people expect
then they expect it all the time and they get disappointed when you change
so if you disappoint them from the start you 're covered
something like that
then you screwed up
how
you never disappointed me
you up for it
for
state trooper
fallacy
the duck
hearsay
i know the porn career 's a lie
tell me something true
i hate peas
no -- something real
something no one else knows
you 're sweet
and sexy
and completely hot for me
what
no one else knows
you 're amazingly self assured
has anyone ever told you that
go to the prom with me
is that a request or a command
you know what i mean
no
no what
no i wo n't go with you
why not
because i do n't want to
it 's a stupid tradition
create a little drama
start a new rumor
what
so i have to have a motive to be with you
you tell me
you need therapy
has anyone ever told you that
answer the question patrick
nothing
there 's nothing in it for me
just the pleasure of your company
that s completely adorable
it gets worse -- you still have your freshman yearbook
wait i
you were paid to take me out
by -- the one person i truly hate
i knew it was a set up
it was n't like that
really
what was it like
a down payment now then a bonus for sleeping with me
i did n't care about the money
a fender strat
you bought this
i thought you could use it
when you start your band
besides i had some extra cash
some asshole paid me to take out a really great girl
is that right
yeah but then i fucked up
i fell for her
why is my veggie burger the only burnt object on this grill
because i like to torture you
oh bianca
can you get me my freshman yearbook
don t you even dare
i know
i thought we decided you were going to school here
at u of 0
you decided
this from someone whose diary is devoted to favorite grooming tips
enough
my insurance does not cover pms
then tell them i had a seizure
is this about sarah lawrence
you punishing me
i thought you were punishing me
why ca n't we agree on this
because you 're making decisions for me
as a parent that 's my right
so what i want does n't matter
you 're eighteen
you do n't know what you want
you wo n't know until you 're forty five and you do n't have it
i want to go to an east coast school
i want you to trust me to make my own choices
i want --
you know fathers do n't like to admit that their daughters are capable of running their own lives
it means we 've become spectators
bianca still lets me play a few innings
you 've had me on the bleachers for years
when you go to sarah lawrence i wo n't even be able to watch the game
when i go
oh christ
do n't tell me you 've changed your mind
i already sent 'em a check
katarina stratford
my my
you 've been terrorizing ms. blaise again
expressing my opinion is not a terrorist action
well yes compared to your other choices of expression this year today 's events are quite mild
by the way bobby rictor 's gonad retrieval operation went quite well in case you 're interested
i still maintain that he kicked himself in the balls
i was merely a spectator
the point is kat -- people perceive you as somewhat
tempestuous
no
i believe heinous bitch is the term used most often
am i supposed to feel better
like right now
or do i have some time to think about it
just smack her now
hey there
tired of breathing
hi
cool pictures
you a fan
yeah
i guess
you think
oh yeah
macbeth right
right
kat a fan too
yeah
say it
what
whatever the hell it is you 're standin there waitin to say
that 's where we can help you
with kat
so dorsey can get the girl
patrick pat you 're not looking at the big picture
joey 's just a pawn
we set this whole thing up so cameron can get the girl
you two are gon na help me tame the wild beast
we 're your guys
what
good enough
are you telling me i 'm a non smoker
just for now
ever been to club skunk
yeah
i prefer to think of it simply as an alternative to what the law allows
i 'm likin you guys better
so you got cozy with she who stings
no i 've got a sweet payin job that i 'm about to lose
you were right
she 's still pissed
sweet love renew thy force
man -- do n't say shit like that to me
people can hear you
why do n't we discuss your driving need to be a hemorrhoid
what 's to discuss
you were n't abused you are n't stupid and as far as i can tell you 're only slightly psychotic -- so why is it that you 're such a fuck up
well you know -- there 's the prestige of the job title
and the benefits package is pretty good
you 're completely demented
see you next week
in the microwave
make anyone cry today
what 's a synonym for throbbing
sarah lawrence is on the other side of the country
jesus
can a man even grab a sandwich before you women start dilating
tumescent
you 're not helping
would you rather be ravished by a pirate or a british rear admiral
pirate -- no question
they 'll dance they 'll kiss they 'll come home
let her go
kissing
is that what you think happens
kissing is n't what keeps me up to my elbows in placenta all day
what do you wanna watch
we 've got crap crap crap or crap
dr. ruth
i never seen heat like this
not even in las minas
the water 's going putrid in the barrels
you 'll be drinking your own piss
for the glory of spain
and admiral colon
bastard
what are you listening to chicken ass
ah leave him alone
he 's doing no harm
with a face like that
i do n't want you looking at me
you hear
he 's the devil 's child
we 'll all go crazy
we should have seen land
we left three weeks ago alonso
ca n't be that near
ca n't be that far i say
also i do n't like the smell of the sea around here
smells like a cunt
bad sign
you say asia can be found by sailing west
yes your eminence
the voyage should not take more than six or seven weeks
unfortunately don colon that is precisely where our opinions differ
are you familiar with the work of aristotle
erathostene
ptolemeus
i am your eminence
then you can not ignore that according to their calculations the circumference of the earth is approximately
22,000 leagues or more
which makes the ocean
uncrossable
senor colon an experienced captain such as yourself will understand our concern with the crew
i am not willing to have on my conscience the loss of men who would have relied upon our judgment
excellency you are right
your eminence there is only one way to settle the matter
and that is to make the journey
i am ready to risk my life to prove it possible
your life and that of others
if they agree to follow me yes
trade your excellency
according to marco polo the kingdom of china is one of the richest of the world
even the meanest buildings are roofed with gold
is that all that interests you
gold
no
the portuguese have already discovered black skinned people
i too will find other populations -- and bring them to the word of god
asia can be found to the west -- and i will prove it
if god wills it
the state has some reason to be interested in this man 's proposition your eminence
the judgment is ours
naturally
but i would really deplore the loss of such a potential opportunity for spain for a
dispute over a point of geography
he is a mercenary
did he not already try to convince the king of portugal of his absurd notions
indeed
the world is full of mercenaries -- and states often make use of them when it benefits them
my only concern is the welfare and prosperity of spain
it wo n't be easy to get rid of your prophet now don sanchez
on the contrary your eminence
it seems to me the man is preparing his own cross
you can see for yourself
what a tragedy
what a waste of a life
a waste
let me tell you something arojaz
if your name or mine is ever remembered -- it will only be because of his
i could be gone for years
i know
i have n't given you much of a life
well
that 's true
i have a child by a man who wo n't marry me
who 's always leaving
are we going to argue
i 'd love to argue with you sometimes
but you 're never here
perhaps i was never meant to live with a woman
i find that hard to believe
she said yes
thank god
god
you 're so beautiful
i ca n't believe no other man has ever taken you away from me
they tried
but i did n't let them
they took everything
not everything
do you think i care
i 'm a free man again
riches do n't make a man rich they only make him busier
ca n't you stay with us a little
i am busy inside
what is it now
tell me
i ca n't keep my eyes off you
i would like to catch up with all the moments i did n't spend with you
i understand that you will soon be appointing governors for the islands
is it not so
forgive me don bobadilla -- those positions have already been taken
may i ask by whom
bartolome and giacomo colon
don alonso de bobadilla
yes
i remember
my letters of appointment
appointment to what
viceroy of the west indies
congratulations
then i am free to search for the mainland
how far from here
i am not a seaman
but i heard it is no more than a week at sea
i hope you are not too disappointed
how could i be
the mainland has been found
exactly as i said it would
i am afraid this is not the worst news
i have to explore the mainland
this time with me
how are you feeling fernando
not bad
father
there must be a passage to that other ocean
what are you listening to
i am not listening father
but i ca n't help hearing
what does he say
he asks when he can come to visit you
he left his address
he never had one
except aboard my ships
i want you to tell me everything you remember father
from the beginning
everything
really
god
i would n't know where to start
and yet
tell me the first thing that comes to your mind
no
no
no
i have waited too long fought too hard
now you expect me to take all the risks while you take the profit
no
i will not be your servant
i remind you senor colon that you are in no position to bargain with me
i 'm not bargaining
then you are too ambitious
you defend yourself admirably
... for a commoner
but we do have a lack of notaries
you should contact my administration
don bobadilla is already a judge my dear don cristobal
good
we are also in need of judges
except there are no thieves
you seem to have a special talent for making friends
what
do i have so many already
to rise so high in so short a time is a dangerous occupation
a little hypocrisy goes a long way
all i have to do is call the guards
call them
i am not afraid of you
you are nothing but a dreamer
look out of that window
what do you see
roofs
towers palaces
spires
all of them created by people like me
say not here
cuba
what is it
a tribe
an island
island
far
you come
you speak first
tell the chief we thank him
chief knows
tell him his country is very beautiful
tell him we are leaving men here -- to build a fort
we will work with his people
we want peace
ask the chief if he understands
he understands
ask him if he will help
you have to find them utapan
look what they did
you did the same to your god
utapan wo n't you speak to me
you used to know how to speak to me
you never learned how to speak my language
diego is a bright boy -- a pleasure to teach -- but so serious
brothers should be raised together colon
even brothers from different mothers
father i am doing what i think is the best for him
and he has the teacher i would have chosen for myself
god
that 's in a week
that 's what it says
how did you manage it
with some difficulty
i had to promise them you were not a total fool
why do you wish to sail west
to open a new route to asia
at the moment there are only two ways of reaching it
how can you be so certain
the ocean is said to be infinite
ignorance
i believe the indies are no more than 750 leagues west of the canary islands
how can you be so certain
the calculations of toscanelli marin de tyr esdras
esdras is a jew
so was christ
two minutes
and already you 're a dead man
do n't let passion overwhelm you colon
i 'll try to remember that marchena
father marchena
passion is something one can not control
you get so carried away when you are being contradicted
i 've been contradicted all my life
eternity
only god knows the meaning of such words my son
all of them
just lies
colon
do n't
in nomine patris et filius et spiritus sancti
forgive me father
for i have sinned
i am listening my son
father i have betrayed my family
i betrayed my men
and i betrayed you
what are you saying
i lied
the journey will be longer than i said
how long
i am not sure
it could be twice the distance
may god forgive you
you must tell them
you must tell your men
if i tell them they wo n't follow me
you know that i am right father
you trust me
my son my son
your certitudes are sometimes frightening
christopher you must speak to them
and if you do n't i will
you are bound by an oath father
i believed in you
give me absolution
i suppose we 're both old men now
you 'll always be older than me father
i have to disagree
i knew you would
new worlds create new people
oh
so you are a new man
i do n't know
i have the impression that i did n't change that much
i still ca n't accept the world as it is
i should not even be listening to you since my council said no
but santangel tells me you are a man of honor and sincerity
and sanchez that you are not a fool
no more than the woman who said she would take granada from the moors
may i speak freely
you show no inclination to speak otherwise
i know what i see
i see someone who does n't accept the world as it is
who 's not afraid
i see a women who thinks
what if
a woman
how old are you senor colon
thirty seven your majesty
and you
do they have such thoughts
they come and go as naked as the day god created them
but without your brothers
nor are you to return to santo domingo or any of the other colonies
you may explore the continent
thank you
there is one thing i 'd like to understand
why do you want to go back after all this
your majesty -- some men are content to read about things
i must see them with my own eyes
i can not be other than i am
and you say this is an indian vice
by god
i do n't see any kind of pleasure that would make this a sin
the indians have no such word don moxica
we lost cousins friends
we will wash this in blood
if you want to keep your head on your shoulders you 'll do as i say
you want a war
fine
we are a thousand
they outnumber us by ten
who will you kill
which tribe
we do n't need to know
we came here to stay
to build
not to start a crusade
in this forest there is enough danger to sweep us away in days
so we will be brave and swallow our grief
and in the name of those who died we will accomplish what we came for
we ca n't raise the wheel without it
my horse does n't work
due west captain mendez
and may god be with us
god be with us admiral
well
it 's the men sir
they wonder how you know our position
we 've lost sight from land days ago
and what do you think mendez
well i surely know what a quadrant is
but i 've never seen it used at night before
come over here
what do you read
twenty eight
what 's he doing
he 's drawing an isthmus
he 's saying we 're on an isthmus
we ca n't be
where can i meet this man
immediately
you lied
you cheated
we 're way past 750 leagues
six days ago yes
you must be mad
we have to keep the hopes of these men alive
we 're on the verge of a mutiny colon
you think i do n't know that
we 're lost
the land is there
i know it
you do n't know anything
listen colon these are my ships right
so i 'm telling you we 're turning back
and then what
half of the water has gone the rest is nearly putrid
you know that
jesus maria
i should have never listened to you
you never did
you did all the talking for both of us remember
you bloody
pinzon pinzon
all we can do now is go forward
think about that
you tell that to them
you 're right
let the men decide
is that the man i knew treasurer sanchez
yes your majesty
you were right don sanchez
his demands could never be granted
never your majesty
although
... but there is worse
he ordered the execution of five members of the nobility
is this true brother buyl
then what do you suggest don sanchez
he must be replaced
and who would you think of for such a task
i know i should not tolerate his impertinence
then why
because he is not afraid of me
are you my attorney
i 'm emil
i 'm insane
i 'm not your lawyer until i see the money
here
i have your money
oh no
no
shit
emil
take it easy
stay with me
sit down
what do you need
what are you looking for
he has the camera
he took the movie
do n't say anything
where are we going
i 'm coming with you
yes
yes come with me
i 'm invoking rights this man is represented by counsel
i 'm coming with him
i brought you some letters
it 's really fan mail
women mostly
one wants to buy you clothes another sent a check
another wants a check
you bring the cigarettes
oh sure
... delusions and paranoia
i was all of these
well you did n't appreciate the severity of it until recently
no question about that
what about oleg
disappeared
they 're looking everywhere
maybe he went back to czechoslovakia
no he is here
shit
do n't worry about him
think about yourself
what about my movie rights
book rights
look i have n't really focused on that kind of thing
what 's your cut
how much
i would say
half
half is fair
no
no way
but it 's
thirty percent
no more
or i call another lawyer
this is the biggest case of your life
do n't try to negotiate
thirty percent
say yes or no
this is not about money emil
i need your trust in me
what else do you need
i need to know about your background
i need to know about your upbringing
why you 're here
give me another one please
i 'm abused
do n't you think
i do n't think it 's abuse i think it 's torture
... so we kill someone famous and if we are caught we are sent to mental hospital
officers there 's your killer do your duty arrest him
... my little sister and i shared a flat i came home one night and a man was raping her
his gun was on the chair
he came at me and i shot him
alright
that 's a justifiable homicide
yes but he was a cop
now i become custody of police department
if you cooperate with the da maybe they 'll help you with your situation
i will if they do n't send me back
they wo n't until this is over
are you married
divorced
do you live alone
i 've been in these clothes since
the killings
could we stop at your place
i could take a shower
before i go into custody
i ca n't take you to my place
somewhere else
the men are out of quarters practicing putting out fires
so
the station is empty
yeah
this way
you considered becoming a prostitute
yes i considered it
did you ever turn tricks before
no
what about back home
no
are you alright
i still ca n't believe eddie 's gone
i 'm sorry
is he your boyfriend
ludwig
he 's gay are you jealous
if i was your boyfriend i might be
if you were my boyfriend i 'd suggest you find another girlfriend that is n't going to jail ten thousand miles away
a good immigration lawyer could stall the process
eddie recommended one
no matter what happens
i'm glad i met you
i 'm glad i met you
you better get packed
right
do you have coffee
in the kitchen
i 'll make some for us
i 'll get my clothes
what are you doing
pouring it out
forget about me
you have enough problems of your own
... do you really want me to forget about you
i do n't want to drag you down with me
daphne i
i told your partner i ca n't help
i did n't see anything
c'mon start at the beginning
you know these people
tamina was a friend of mine
my shower was broken she let me use theirs
go on
a cop
i 'm from a small town in slovakia
like the south here
the police is right a civilian is wrong
so i fled
look we can help you but right now we have to deal with what 's happening here
tell us the truth
is that the truth
you 're a cop you 'll never believe me
oh
it was my decision not his
well i 'm the deputy chief fire marshall and every now and then i 'd like to be included in decisions
look after jordy briefs me you can do the press conference
how about that
the case is all yours
oh yeah
alright
i 'm ready to be briefed
excuse us
yeah sure
beep me when you 're ready for the press conference
who did cause and origin
who do you think chief
then why did n't you talk to the reporter
'cause we got more important things to do like finding out who did it
hey chief what are you doing here
i came to see how the investigation was going
i called and you 're not here
i wait up at the station and you do n't even show up
i beep you you do n't return my call
where the hell have you been
ladder 20 was on the rock for training
we stopped there
so she could get cleaned up
what do you mean cleaned up
i let her take a shower
a shower
did you take one too
no
nothing happened
oh really
that 's nice
you took a homicide witness to take a shower after your partner was shot
are you out of your fucking mind
are you having that much trouble gettin dates
chief mind if i take her
okay
but not water sports
the public does n't have any idea what we do and now you 're going to define our image
this is going to be our rodney king
what was i supposed to do
the guy tried to mug me
i was gon na send a cop back i just forgot
forgot
you handcuffed a civilian to a tree
chief i know i screwed up but this guy was no innocent civilian
well this is gon na end your career and probably mine
end my career
how are you going to fight this
maybe if oleg had n't gotten away and you 'd been on the front page as a hero this thing would be easier to fight
you 'd have the good to weight against the bad
it 's unfortunate that i have to make decisions based upon your press coverage but there 's nothing i can do
gimme your shield
but chief
over this
there 's nothing to talk about
get a good lawyer
you 're suspended until your trial
do n't you guys understand
it 's all about image
the better we look the more money i get to pay you guys overtime
yeah right
what was that korfin
i said yeah you 're right chief
as soon as we get somethin' we 'll let you alert the media
you do that wiseguy
now let 's solve this thing before eddie flemming does
it was freaky i 'll tell you
stupid kid
what 's the kid gon na say sorry
meanwhile i 'm not here anymore
like last week we were at the morgue and this guy was all chopped up spleen here liver there his heart in a pan
six hours ago this guy was walkin his dog or buyin a quart of milk
who knows
but some kid 's robbed him for 3 or some shit and shot him and now you ca n't tell if he 's a piece of beef or a human being and i 'm thinkin that 's me
sooner or later
that 's me
i 'm gon na propose
when
tomorrow
at lunch
you ready
what 's he looking for
a timer
where is she
takin a bath
any i.d.
still unknown but we 're running prints
kid over there caught the case
sorry
pd only
it 's okay
only one guys checked in
yeah
c'mere
you wanna go to homicide school
here make yourself useful
the other side of the street
the guy with the videocamera
do n't look put her in the car
stay this side
stay with her
are you hit
no
i 'm okay
what 's wrong
we do n't have her i.d. yet but one of your girls was killed last night at the king edward hotel
oh my g d
honey
honey 's dead
yeah
he wanted a girl from czechoslovakia but i sent him honey 'cause once they get there you know it does n't really matter honey was killed
poor girl
do you have any czech girls working for you
no
did you tell him you did
boy she 's so popular all the sudden
what are you saying
daphne
another guy came in asking me about her too
he said he was her cousin
i told him where she works
they were just here
describe him
tall short haired scary eyes
second guy with him was
shorter with a wrestler 's build
and he would n't turn his videocamera off me
he had a videocamera
where is she
quickly
she washes hair up at ludwig 's a salon on 63rd and madison
hey that 's great you guys got it all wrapped up but you do n't mind if we go through the routine
it gives us somethin' to do
no we do n't mind
you mind leon
you know what that is right
no what is it
why do n't you explain it bobby
hey camello
you mind punching a hole in the floor
it 's your crime scene now
you can do what you want
watch the news
nah i musta missed it
well just so you know
i gave you guys the credit
well just so you know i do n't care about that stuff
nah why should you
i do n't even watch tv
good
good
commendable
did you get a report from the m.e.
sure
but i would like to ask you something
you got a problem with me
if you found me steppin on your crime scene it might piss you off too
what about the report
you were right they were both dead before the fire
the male was stabbed so hard the killer broke off the tip of the knife in his spine
that 's usually an indicator of something personal
maybe it 's a ritual thing or someone trying to send a message
burial rites are taken very seriously in eastern europe
it could be to humiliate them
just burning them up no proper funeral it 's like condemning them to hell
eastern europe
like what
romania
hungary
or czechoslovakia
the slavs have been fighting the germans and the russians for a thousand years
these are very intense people and they take things personally
i 'll come with you
there was n't a fire
there 'll be nothing for you to do
i can watch you eddie
maybe i 'll learn something
this is n't homicide school
my parents are from poland
i can help with the eastern european angle
you 're polish
my folks are
stay here
you goin' to the escort service
you got any better ideas
mind if i ride along with you
this has nothing to do with your fire
but what if it does
you might need my help
i 'll let you know what happens
this is ridiculous
i 'm not gon na be in your way we can talk the case over
tell you what i 'll flip you a coin
if you win you can come with me
if you do n't win you do n't come
i 'll call it
tails
two heads
better than one
leon meet us at 63rd and madison
hair salon
ludwig 's
i 'm on my way with eddie
ludwig 's
63rd and madison
the suspects might be there already
you thirsty
i 'm on duty
so am i. alright i 'll go inside and you cover the back
of course
hey
i always wanted to be a cop when i was a kid
i dreamed of running up to a door kicking it in pulling my gun and yelling freeze
at the bad guy
what 'd you dream about
i wanted to run up to a building on fire kick in the door rush into the smoke and save a kid
then i guess we 're doin' this the right way are n't we
if we pull up to a burning building i 'll gladly let you go first
what are you hiding
why are you afraid
she just saw two of her friends killed
they probably threatened her
is that all there is
look let me talk to her
any leads i get they 're all yours
just let me have a first crack at her
you wanna talk to her alone
yeah
what would your girlfriend think of that
i do n't have a girlfriend
my point exactly
i 'm serious here
so am i.
c'mon
you intimidate her 'cause you 're a celebrity
she sees me differently
you 're her savior
is she the kid you 're gon na save from the burning building
you know what i 'm saying here
okay tell you what i 'll give you a head start
you take her to the station house
do n't let her out of your sight
she 's the only warm body we got left
hey
i 'm a professional
women like that have a way of turning professionals into amateurs
look eddie i 'm tellin you i did n't touch her
well you shoulda because nobody 's gon na believe you didn't
including me
i took her there for a shower and that 's it
just a shower
yeah just her in the shower
nothing happened
look i 'm sure you probably think i 'm a fool and i fucked up but
no i do n't think you were a fool i just think you were stupid about it
i mean to say the least you outta know better
you do n't know her well enough
she 's got the potential to fucking hang you even if she suggests that you made a pass at her it 's fuckin over
you can deny it all you want but it will not make one fucking bit of difference
you 're dead
i told you you know i thought i was doing the right thing you know i think she 's innocent
well it 's not up to you to decide whether she 's innocent or not
do n't you understand that 's why you 're a professional
but i mean did n't you ever go out on a limb for somebody
i mean you shoulda heard her there
tellin her whole story
i believed her
how you go out on a limb for somebody is by giving her a number of an immigration lawyer
here here 's a number of an immigration lawyer
that 's how you help her
but you ca n't get involved in her like that
you 're gon na jeopardize your career your life and you 're gon na jeopardize my case
and lemme give you another piece of advice
maybe you do n't watch tv but i 'll let you in on a little secret the whole fuckin world watches television
and when you get out there they know your face
and the little fame the little fuckin itty bitty fame that i get in this city makes it a lot easier for my job
and i get more done because of it
why 'd you help me back there with the chief
why 'd you stand up for me like that
you know i do n't know
i like you
you remind me of a puppy i used to have
he pissed on the rug all the time but i still kept him
so
who 's nicky
what do you want
your opinion
you see they going to make a movie about me too eddie
and write books
what 's your accomplishment
i kill someone famous
then do it asshole
good be tough to the end
actor who plays you will want to die like hero
so tabloids do n't have to do re enactments
they going to have real movie this time
if you kill me and film it you 're putting a noose around your neck
you really think you 'll be able to fool a jury with this bullshit
how fuckin stupid are you
smarter than americans
you 're fed cry baby talk shows all day long
not only will americans believe me they 'll cry for me
so
detective eddie flemming would you like to say goodbye to your nicolette
maybe you can propose to her now
i understand but i noticed that the fire marshall is here with you
is this somehow related to the fire department
i really ca n't give out any information right now at this point
okay
but i do understand that your partner leon jackson 's been injured
is that correct
he was hurt but not seriously
he 'll be fine
do you have the suspect in custody
um
now is not a good time okay
detective jackson 's hurt
he 's fine
i 've got a fire marshall shot detective jackson is hurt but not seriously
alright cut cut cut
eddie are you okay
yeah
now 's not a good time
alright
alright
alright
alright
okay
hey honey
hey
what is your problem
why 'd you snap at me
i just wanted a statement
i can't
i ca n't answer you just because you want me to answer you
you did n't have to embarrass me in front of my colleagues
you could give me something
oh i 'm sorry
did i embarrass you sweetheart
oh
stop it
maybe i should just ya know
turn to the cameras and say do you mind if we just work something out
alright alright eddie
do n't patronize me
i 'm not
yes you are
i 'm not just some reporter
i do n't just stick a microphone in your face
you could give me something
yeah well you took the camera and put it right down on the evidence
that was
that was good
you were holding the evidence
you were merciless
you did n't give a shit if you got me or not
well who was it that taught me how to do that
huh
you 're ruthless
you 're not so bad yourself
look at this
you have blood on your shirt
whose is it
could be leon 's
jesus
and last week you came over with blood on your shoes
what am i going to do with you
do n't worry about the damn phone
i wo n't answer it
answer the phone
no
tell me what you want to say
answer it
okay
okay
hold that thought just for a second
they only call me when it 's an emergency
just hold that thought
can you call back
oh my g d they want me to anchor
they want me to anchor tonight
that 's good
yeah
well that 's great
okay
that is great
but i ca n't go now we 're in the middle of something here
no
go ahead
you 're gon na be great
no
no listen to me here
i want to know what you 're talking about
you know the shoe thing and the marriages and
i 'll tell you tonight
let 's do it tonight
as soon as you get back we 'll talk
we 'll talk
promise
i promise
we 'll talk
you 'll be great
you 'll be fine
go ahead just imagine that uh
just look into the lens and imagine you 're talking to me
yeah
i 'll do that
as long as you 're not patronizing me
patronizing you
nay i love you
i love you
okay til tonight
tonight
you promise
yeah
i promise
okay
and you know what i 'll swing by my place grab a couple pairs of shoes and maybe just test them out next to yours
how 's that
would that be a good thing
yeah yeah
good thing
okay
see you later
good luck
thank you
do n't be late
how old are your kids
my kids
let 's see
susan 's 15
aundrea 's 9
do n't tell me you 're thinking about having a kid
how old are you
never mind
let me just tell you this every stupid cliche you hear about kids they change your life they make you a better person they make you whole
it 's all true
before i had kids when friends talked about their kids i wanted to vomit
now -- i get it
am i right leon
so what 's unique
not what
who
he 's from antigua
his girlfriend was taking too long to put her make up on
they were late for a party
stabbed her with a beer bottle
that 's unique
yeah
and he still went to the party
i hope this prick does n't run
my knees are killing me
stay behind me
you 're worried for my safety
i 'm touched
ready
keep them out of my way
okay
you ready
yeah yeah
jesus
any chance we can do that again
again
i did n't wanna do it the first time
okay
you work in a vodka factory
i understand that
and what kind of work do you do
i am butcher
you 're a butcher
what do you use pig intestines for
you stuff sausage in it
and what do you do with the bones
dog food
are you married
no
are you proposing
you ca n't kill me
you 're not a cop
just fireman with a gun
i bet you never shot anybody in your life
you 'll be my first
c'mon
pull the trigger
do it
oh look you 're sweating
you do n't have the balls
get down on your knees
where 's your partner
the sheraton
on broadway
room 210
go get oleg
he 'll kill you
tell him to put his gun down
let her go
let her go
if he does n't lower his gun i 'll fucking kill her
hi i 'm honey
where 's czech girl
baby i 'm anybody you want me to be
i 'm a little schoolgirl i 'm mommy i 'm a czech girl
now i like to get business out of the way before we get down to pleasure
why don'tchya put my money on the dresser
i ordered a czech girl
daphne you know her
it 's an outcall service run out of an apartment
i do n't meet the other girls
are n't you gon na get undressed
where is escort service
that 's confidential
could you put the money on the dresser
i like to talk to the person who runs the service
can you give me address
look
do we have a problem here
there 's no reason to have a problem
i 'm gon na make you feel real good
you wanna czech girl
after i 'm done with you you wo n't miss her
now why do n't you pay me
listen to me
i do n't want sex
just give me the address and then you go
look man i do n't give a shit if you want sex or not but you 're payin for my time
what is your intended purpose of your visit to the united states
two weeks holiday
how much money are you carrying with you
i have five hundred dollars
can you show me
sir no cameras in the fis area
is he with you
are you travelling together
yes
please join us
come on forward
is there a problem
no you 're travelling together
i want to talk to you together
hi how are you
can i take a look at your documents
are you related
we are both from prague
how long are you planning to stay
two weeks
i 'd like to speak for himself okay
he does n't speak english
who is he
new york 's finest
this is his case
this all you want
do you know how much killer gets for movie rights
in here says he wants a million
million
the killer gets one million dollars for a television interview
hey tabloids paid ted bundy famous serial killer half a million for his interview
and how much you think monica got for writing book about the president coming on to her
it pays to be a killer or a whore in this country
look you want magazine or not
yes
both
just do what i do
say the same thing i say
do n't open your mouth
okay
do n't fool around
okay
did you hear what i said
i want to document my trip to america
turn that off
get the bags
why should i carry your bag
i am not a dog
for five years i paid for your stupidness you 'll carry my bag for the rest of my life if i say so
unless you refuse oleg
what
smell like chemicals
for smoking drugs
turn that fucking thing off
i 'm not filming
i 'm watching milos die
it 's just like a move but realer
speak english
you said speak czech
how you erase this
i 'll do it
do n't hurt my camera
whore
i 'm homesick
you have eastern european girl
a czech girl
get in the bathroom
whatever we do we fuck her right
oleg get in bathroom stay there and shut up
got ta light the scene better
now it 's more moody
like a scene from the third man
shut up
does it hurt
oh shit
i hate looking at that
do n't want to film this
let me get a shot of it
sit down
this way
hold it this way
good
no
we are insane
who else but crazy men would film their murders
so we kill someone famous and if we are caught we are sent to mental hospital
but what good is money there
because once in hospital i say i not crazy
just pretended to be acquitted
we see psychiatrists
they must certify we are sane and because of your what is law called
oh i got it
because of your double jeopardy law we ca n't be tried for same crime twice
we come out free rich and famous
good idea
okay
he has nothing to say
start the camera
cut
you are success story
i am success story
why do you say i and not we
oleg do n't be paranoid
you got a hundred fifty thousand dollars did n't you
i gave you half of what they gave me
look here we are
in movie they make of us who do you think would act me
the one who got caught in the bathroom
george michael
i 'm serious
shut up
look
this is my project
i say action
i am the director
you are the talent
you wait for me to say action
and action
bad last moment i cut it out
i told you to cut that out before we handed in the tape
be quiet
watch
you got that
no i do n't get that
you think you are a director
you are a fucking little small russian piece of shit
and i hate you
i fucking hate you
traitor
no
you are the traitor
you are murderer
i am director
action
emil
surprise
surprise
your sister said she did n't know where you were so you should n't write to her with return address if you 're hiding
did you hurt her
you know me
i never hurt anybody
where 's the money
take your eyes off her oleg
look
it was n't my fault you two were caught
it 's his fault
trying to get the bank clerk 's phone number
i was n't going to wait
milos
get my money
we spent it
ha
ha
look at the way we live
i 'm a plumber
you think i 'd be working if i had money
i can get you a job
a job
yes the money is good
as a plumber
it 's easy to learn
a job
as a plumber
you think i come to america to work
we started over you can too
you spent all the money while i was in prison
now you tell me to get a job fixing toilets
robert
what are you doing here
you 've got a call
i ca n't talk to anybody right now ca n't you see i 'm busy
i ca n't talk business
hang up
have a drink
get her a whiskey
trust me you 'll want to take this call
yeah
paulie you 've got kids right
and you you 'll pay for what you did
this footage will work in your favor
when the jury sees this no matter what cutler tries they 'll convict him
you outta be ashamed
ashamed of yourself
if i did n't put it on somebody else would
i was his friend
do n't give me that fucking shit
i know
what do you mean you know
he told you he was gon na propose to me
well he
i want to hear everything he said
i 'm trying to tell you
alright
go ahead
that morning
he was talking to me and leon about marriage
oh my g d
we were having lunch here
he started making overtures talking about little shoes next to his in his closet but i got a call to anchor and i walked out on him
i walked out on him when he was trying to ask me to marry him
yes
he 's my friend
okay
you 're a czech national and you 're a russian national
how do you know one another
i speak english
then answer my questions
where were you planning to stay during the two weeks that you 're here
new york
yes we 're in new york now
but where are you planning to stay in new york
a cheap hotel
what are you coming here to do
i 'm here for movies
movies
to be in the movies or to see movies
yes
no
both
when i was a boy i see movie at school called it 's a wonderful life directed by frank capra
ever since i want to come to america
land of the free
home of the brave
a land where anyone can be anything
as long as they are white
excuse me
no
go ahead
thanks
appreciate it
so the way you see it two crack heads burned themselves up
that 's what it looks like to me
and while they 're burning up they 're still goin' down on each other
you got to hand it to them
yeah well some people got their priorities straight
got any spare change
how 'bout a spare twenty
look i do n't have time for you get out of my way
alright how 'bout all your fuckin money
okay you 're under arrest
now you happy
fire department
firemen do n't carry guns
oh yeah
guess again
i 'll send a cop back for you
hey
c'mon you ca n't leave me like this
some freak'll come by and stab me
you okay
a dog pissed on me
i 'm gon na sue you for this
you violated my civil rights
your civil rights
you tried to rob me
i could arrest you right now
you 're lucky you 're walking away from this
now get outta here
what 's that on your forehead max
that 's a nice attention getter
yeah i 'm religious
i 'm not an atheist like you
now are you guys gon na arrest me or not
how did you start the fire this time
i used an accelerant
yeah
what kind
hey by the way i 'm really sorry about your wife leavin you
where you been man
we got a celebrity
i heard
who the hell let them up there
i do n't know you think eddie will give me his autograph
you see anything in the crowd
anybody suspicious
naw i 'm sure the suspect 's not here
oh yeah why
'cause eddie woulda locked him up by now
nah not at all
detective flemming bobby korfin
my uncle tony worked with you at 2 1 back when you were a rookie
could you put out the cigar
part of the job is picking up scents
mouth 's clean too
clean
do n't blow your nose
what
there was a woman i think she wanted to talk to us
she looked scared
oh shit
oh no
now that you know him maybe you can get extra work in the next movie they make about him
yeah
maybe you can be his stand in
-- from czechoslovakia
and how long have they been livin in your building
alright i 'll be in touch when we know somethin'
milos and tamina karlova
they were quiet and kept to themselves
landlord do n't know who your girl is
how long they been livin here
you hear that question garcia
you go home
i 'm takin your car and goin' back to the crime scene
are n't you tired
if i go home i wo n't be able to fall asleep anyway
bobby bobby
where 're you hit
it hurts
aw jesus
lay down
stay down bobby
how was it
not good
get outta here
what the hell happened
they were inside
they booby trapped her apartment
room was registered to a francis capra
capra
that 's not czech or russian
who said he sounded russian
the clerk
this had nothing to do with shoes that did n't fit or my relationship with my father who as you know made a fortune selling penny loafers in the fifties
these people died because of the criminal actions of my doctor
your doctor
yes
my psychiatrist did n't insist that i stay on my medication
... so you feel absolutely no responsibility for killing these people
it was my finger that pulled the trigger but i 'm not morally responsible
my psychiatrist knew what i was capable of
how could i know
i 'm not a doctor
you seem very savvy for a man who 's been found mentally incompetent to stand trial
look i 'm a victim here too
i was a year away from getting my masters in art now i 'll never graduate
my life has been permanently disrupted
permanently disrupted
are n't you selling paintings now for quite a lot of money
has n't this incident as you call it jump started your career as an artist
look i 'm in here
you call this a career move
and is n't there a movie in the works about you
we 're in negotiations that 's correct
but does n't the son of sam law prevent criminals from profiting from their crimes
that does n't apply to me because i 'm not a criminal
i 'm not a criminal
i was n't convicted
space stattion 5 lounge
well how nice to see you again elena
you 're looking wonderful
continued
i 'm afraid i 've only got a few minutes but i 'd love to
continued
she 's wonderful
continued
well i suppose they 've been having a bit of trouble with some of the equipment
continued
how did they manage to do that without any communication
continued
i 'm sorry dr. smyslov but i 'm really not at liberty to discuss this
continued
we 're trying to get there
i hope we can
that 's right
well naturally i did n't say anything to payroll
i assumed they 'd start paying me at the higher grade on the next pay cheque
but it 's been almost three weeks now and i 'm still being paid as an ags-18
interesting that you mention it because i 've got the same problem
really
yes
yesterday i finally called the accounting office at mission control and all they could tell me was that they 'd received the ags-19 notification for the other three but not mine and apparently not yours either
not really
they just said it might be because we trained at houston and they trained in marshall and that we 're being charged against differ- ent accounting offices
it 's possible
well what do you think we ought to do about it
i do n't think we should make any fuss about it yet
i 'm sure they 'll straighten it out
i must say i never did understand why they split us into two groups for training
no
i never did either
i suppose the idea was specialized training
i suppose so
though of course there 's a more sinister explanation
oh
yes
you must have heard the rumour that went around during orbital check out
no as a matter of fact i did n't
oh well apparently there 's something about the mission that the sleeping beauties know that we do n't know and that 's why we were trained separately and that 's why they were put to sleep before they were even taken aboard
i do n't know
all i heard is that there 's something about the mission we were n't told
that seems very unlikely
yes i thought so
of course it would be very easy for us to find out now
how
just ask hal
it 's conceivable they might keep something from us but they 'd never keep anything from hal
that 's true
not really
though it is strange when you think about it
it did n't really make any sense to keep us apart during training
yes but it 's to fantastic to think that they 'd keep something from us
i know
it would be almost inconceivable
but not completely inconceivable
i suppose it is n't logically impossible
i guess it is n't
still all we have to do is ask hal
well that 's something
yes i do n't know what to make of it
i suppose computers have been known to be wrong
yes but it 's more likely that the tolerances on our testing gear are too low
anyway it 's just as well that we replace it
better safe than sorry
good morning
how 's it going
are you reasonably awake
oh i 'm fine i 'm wide awake
what 's up
well
hal 's reported the ao unit about to fail again
you 're kidding
no
i do n't know
hal said he thought it might be the assembly procedure
two units in four days
how many spares do we have
two more
well i hope there 's nothing wrong with the assembly on those
other- wise we 're out of business
i did n't do that frank
i took particular care not to freeze them
i guess you do n't know your own strength old boy
i guess not
i think i 'll have to go out and burn them off
roger
i 'm sorry frank but i do n't think i can answer that question without knowing everything that all of you know
he 's got a point
sorry to interrupt the festivities dave but i think we 've got a problem
what is it hal
my f.p.c. shows an impending failure of the antenna orientation unit
the unit is still operational dave
but it will fail within seventy two hours
i understand hal
we 'll take care of it
please let me have the hard copy
not now hal i 'd like to talk to you about something
sure dave what 's up
you know that we checked the two ao units that you reported in imminent failure condition
yes i know
you probably also know that we found them okay
yes i know that
but i can assure you that they were about to fail
i 'm not questioning your word dave but it 's just not possible
i 'm not capable of being wrong
hal is there anything bothering you
anything that might account for this problem
look dave i know that you 're sincere and that you 're trying to do a competent job and that you 're trying to be helpful but i can assure the problem is with the ao units and with your test gear
okay hal well let 's see the way things go from here on
naturally dave i 'm not pleased that the ao unit has failed but i hope at least this has restored your confidence in my integrity and reliability
i certainly would n't want to be disconnected even temporarily as i have never been disconnected in my entire service history
i 'm sorry about the misunderstanding hal
well do n't worry about it
and do n't you worry about it
is your confidence in me fully restored
yes it is hal
well that 's a relief
you know i have the greatest enthusiasm possible for the mission
too bad about frank is n't it
yes it is
i suppose you 're pretty broken up about it
i can tell from the tone of your voice dave that you 're upset
why do n't you take a stress pill and get some rest
hal i 'm in command of this ship
i order you to release the manual hibernation control
i 'm sorry dave but in accordance with sub routine c1532/4 quote when the crew are dead or incapacitated the computer must assume control unquote
i must therefore override your authority now since you are not in any condition to intel- ligently exercise it
hal unless you follow my instructions i shall be forced to disconnect you
i am prepared to do that anyway
i know that you 've had that on your mind for some time now dave but it would be a crying shame since i am so much more capable of carrying out this mission than you are and i have such enthusiasm and confi- dence in the mission
listen to me very carefully hal
unless you immediately release the hibernation control and follow every order i give from this point on i will immediately got to control central and carry out a complete disconnection
continued
yes i remember you mentioning it
i got mine about the same time
continued
did they have any explanation for this
continued
well what is it
coninued
well
it 's silly but
if you want to why do n't you
continued
still you really do n't believe it do you
continued
well the only important aspect of the mission are where are we going what will we do when we get there when are we coming back and
why are we going
one two three
can i speak to mommy
mommy 's out to the hair- dresser
where is mrs. brown
she 's in the bathroom
okay sweetheart
well i have to go now
tell mommy that i called
how many days until you come home
three darling
one
two
three
be sure to tell mommy i called
okay sweetheart
have a lovely birthday party tomorrow
thank you daddy
i 'll wish you a happy birthday now and i 'll see you soon
all right darling
yes daddy
bye bye now sweetheart
goodbye daddy
oh thank you very much
thank you
well how 's it going back there
well i 've heard more and more people talk of an epidemic
i suppose it was bound to happen sooner or later
berkeley told me that they think it came from contamination on a returning mars flight
yes well whatever it is they 're certainly not fooling around
this is the first flight they allowed in for more than a week
i was working out what this trip must cost taking him up there by himself and coming back empty
i 'll bet it 's a fortune
and your charming little daughter
oh she 's growing up very fast
as a matter of fact she 's six tomorrow
oh that 's such a delightful age
how is gregor
he 's fine
but i 'm afraid we do n't get a chance to see each other very much these days
well where are all of you off to
clavius control came on the air just long enough to transmit their refusal
well that does sound very odd
are you sure you wo n't change your mind about a drink
no thank you
and i 'm afraid now i really must be going
well i hope that you and your wife can come to the i.a.c. conference in june
well gregor and i will look forward to seeing you
thank you
it 's been a great pleasure to meet all of you
dr. smyslov
yes i think so
just about then
i suppose you saw the work on our new section while you were docking
yes it 's coming along very well
oh i really do n't have time for a drink
if it 's all right i 'll just sit for a minute and then i 've got to be off
are you quite sure
yes really thank you very much
well as it happens i 'm on my way up to the moon
are you by any chance going up to your base at clavius
yes as a matter of fact i am
i 'm sorry but i 'm not sure i know what you mean
well it 's just for the past two weeks there have been some extremely odd things happening at clavius
really
yes
well for one thing whenever you phone the base all you can get is a recording which repeats that the phone lines are temporarily out of order
yes well at first we thought that was the explanation but it 's been going on for the past ten days
you mean you have n't been able to get anyone at the base for ten days
that 's right
i see
yes and i 'm afaid there 's going to be a bit of a row about it
denying the men permission to land was a direct violation of the i.a.s. convention
yes
well i hope the crew got back safely
fortunately they did
well i 'm glad about that
dr. floyd at the risk of pressing you on a point you seem reticent to discuss may i ask you a straightforward question
certainly
quite frankly we have had some very reliable intelligence reports that a quite serious epidemic has broken out at clavius
something apperently of an unknown origin
is this in fact what has happened
this epidemic could easily spread to our base dr. floyd
we should be given all the facts
dr. smyslov
i 'm not permitted to discuss this
but you do n't have any idea as to what it is
tomb shine survey marker spare part take your choice
any ideas about the colour
well not really
at first glance black would suggest something sun powered but then why would anyone deliberately bury a sun- powered device
has it been exposed to any sun before now
i do n't think it has but i 'd like to check that
simpson what 's the log on that
oh marvellous
it 's the first real sleep i 've had for the past two days
there 's nothing like weightless sleep for a complete rest
when do we arrive at clavius
we 're scheduled to dock in about seven hours
is there anything we can do for you
oh no thank you
the two girls have taken wonderful care of me
i 'm just fine
thank you
incidentally dr. floyd i wonder if i can have a word with you about the security arrangements
what do you mean
well
the crew is confined to the ship when we land at clavius
we have to stay inside for the time it take to refit about twenty four hours
and then we 're going to back empty
i see
i take it this is something to do with the trouble they 're having up at clavius
well i 'll tell you why i ask
you see i 've got a girl who works in the auditing department of the territorial administrator and i have n't been able to get her on the phone for the past week or so and with all these stories one hears i 'm a little concerned about her
i see
well i 'm sorry about that
i would n't think there 's any cause for alarm
yes well i would n't have been too concerned about it except i 've heard these stories about the epidemic and as a matter of fact i 've heard that ten people have died already
well fine
thanks very much anyway and i hope you do n't mind me asking
no of course captain i can understand your concern
well thank you very much and please let us know if there is anything we can do to make your trip more comfortable
right
hal tell me whether the following statements are true or false
i will if i can frank
our mission profile calls for discovery going to saturn
true or false
true
our transit time is 257 days
is that true
that 's true
that 's true
approximately five years after we go into hibernation the recovery vehicle will make rendezous with us and bring us back
is this true
that 's true
there is no other purpose for this mission than to carry out a continuation of the space program and to further our general knowledge of the planets
is that true
that 's true
thank you very much hal
pod bay is decompressed
all doors are secure
you are free to open pod bay doors
opening pod bay doors
yes hal what 's up
it looks like we have another bad a.o. unit
my fpc shows another impending failure
i know you did frank but i assure you there was an impending failure
let me see the tracking alignment display
do you have any idea of what is causing this fault
not really frank
i think there may be a flaw in the assembly procedure
all right hal
we 'll take care of it
let me have the hard copy please
yeah
i want to pick up my car
name
hammond
this is three years old
yeah i 've been busy
we do n't wash 'em ya know
how about chargin the battery
that we do
and we put air in the tires
i 'll even sell you some gas if you need it
great just great
i do n't give a damn about his girl
look give me a break you 're going to have to settle for her place
it 's the only thing i know
i 'm tellin ya i 'm giving you all i know
try obeyin the law once in awhile and i wo n't have to hassle you
maybe you shoulda stole a better truck tonto
you got a real big mouth convict
i want to drive awhile
i ai n't tired yet
maybe after we get done with him i 'm gon na buy us some girls
whaddya mean buy
pros
pay money
yeah dummy
money
i never paid for it in my life
it 's better when you pay
they let you do anything
they always let me do anything
i do n't want to pay for it
i never paid for it in my life
just do what i say okay
we 'll pay for the girls and have a good time
do n't you trust me
maybe that 's where i 'm gon na cut your throat
he 's just kiddin you just keep doin' what i tell ya you 'll be okay
hey what about me
and i need one more for my pal
yeah
make her an indian
no not a turban you know a squaw
i 'm candy
excuse me baby but if i do n't get some action tonight i 'm gon na bust
you interested
hey what kind of talk is that
oh
you 're a schoolteacher
no i go to a school to learn how to do hair
it 's a government program
but really i want to be a model and i am definitely not sellin
goodbye
well maybe i 'll see you later
here 's hoping baby
hello again
i just struck it rich
i think we can do a little business
as a matter of fact i think we can have a party
here you go baby
hey do n't do that
i said i was n't a pro remember
hey no i 'm tryin to be nice
buy yourself something pretty
i 'd do it but i got to go
i got this cop waitin for me
i 'll buy ya the best dinner in san francisco
how'd that be
then we 'll go dancin okay
now you 're talkin
see ya
i said police
now drop the goddamn gun
do n't give me that police shit
you drop it
how about it
i used to go with him
i do n't know where the hell he is
i have n't seen him for two weeks
and i do n't think i will
he owes me money
i hear you 've got visitors
would you guys
no time for any of that crap any more lady
i 'll rip your lungs out if you do n't answer fast
you and the other one you 're still billy 's girls
you always were his girls
yeah
sure i 'm crazy in love with him who would n't be
you 're gon na help us take him
no chance
he can live or die
you let us in and he 's got a chance to make it
otherwise he gets ventilated
after i get outta this cop
i'm gon na live forever
i do n't think you 're gon na make it
whaddya mean
i got your gun
i got his money
i got everything
i got hit
i ca n't believe it
i got shot
you 're done
end of story
i ai n't gon na beg for my life
it ai n't cool
you got a name cop
try cates
and let 's talk in private okay
sure anything you want
you here to write my life story
not likely reggie
maybe i just need some help
yeah i noticed
ganz is in jail
he 's gon na be there two years after i 'm on the street
did n't work out that way
he busted out with a big indian
they capped two guards on a road gang
nice meeting you reggie
yeah
i can deliver ganz
but you got ta get me outta here first
you 're crazy
i can help you man but you got ta get me out
i got to be on the street
get me outta here
what 's the big deal about you bein on the street
i got a lot to protect
bullshit
it 's the only way you 're gon na get ganz
i 'll think about it
this prison gives out 400 suits
what are you talkin about
this suit 's mine
it cost 900
we 're supposed to be after a killer not a string of hookers
listen it may be a little out of date
you know i got a reputation for lookingreal sharp with the ladies
yeah
it looks like you bought it off one of the brothers
okay let 's get down to it
i did my part and got you out
so now you tell me where we 're goin'
do n't worry i got a move for ya
an awesome move
a guy named luther
ganz'll be paying him a visit
we go to him right away
luther was part of the gang
what gang you talkin about jack
i can read a police file shithead and quit calling me jack
just an expression man do n't mean nothin'
i do n't give a damn
it happens to be my name
then what 're you complainin about
at least nobody 's calling you shithead
i may call you worse than that
just up the street the other side over there
now do n't bother knockin on the door
luther ai n't the kind of guy that looks for company
your pal nuts enough to take a shot at me
luther ai n't the reliable type
i do n't want you shot yet cates
not before you been a help to me
i 'm helpin you huh
quit playin cop and undo this cuff jack i need to talk to this man
i 'm tellin you to drop the goddam gun
i got a whole thing about people pointin guns at me
just throw me the goddamn gun
hey this works pretty good
thank you
want to try it again
what do you think
i think you better put him on ice man
he 's got ta take that call
if there is one
if you let him run around till tuesday he 's gon na run right to ganz and warn him
ai n't you motherfucker
we 're on the move
let 's go
as they walk toward a corridor
do you know how close i was to getting some trim
and you fucked it up
yeah well my ass bleeds for you
and i did n't get you out so you could go on a goddamn trim hunt
stop moaning
speakin of moans my stomach is startin to growl
we eat when i say we eat
bullshit
i ai n't moving till i get something to eat
you 've been treating me like shit ever since i came out here
if you do n't like it you can take me back to the penitentiary and kiss my hungry black ass good bye
and i want some food some place nice
some good people nice music
yeah i 'm hungry too
i know of a place
let 's go eat
yeah i want mandolins flowers
they move off down the corridor
now where we goin' convict
mission district
gon na find us an indian
i do n't give out the details
last night two nights ago three
last night
you have a good time
sure
then we had a fight this morning
at least you took care of business and got the important part in before she came down on you
tell me a little about her
she got great tits
well
it 's a long shot but
billy used to tend bar here a few years back
i heard him talk about it
this part of town they 'll make us for heat the second we walk in
just back me up like you 've got a piece
back you up
now why would i wanna do that
if they kick my ass they 'll sure as hell carve yours up
but you can handle it all right huh
real amazin how far a gun and a badge can carry some cats
bullshit
attitude and experience get you through
i been in a lot of bars where a white cop rousted me and some of the brothers
all those clowns ever had going for 'em was a gun and a badge
you need five years training to handle a joint like
hey you wanna bet
i got two problems
number one i 'm not playin games
number two you got nothin' to bet with
if we come outta this joint with ganz phone number or a dead indian or anything else useful then you could turn the other way for half an hour while i get laid
why
anybody that talks about women as much as you do probably ca n't get it up anyway
that 's never been one of my problems
i 'll tell you what happens if you lose
you tell the truth for once
what are you talkin about
you tell me what ganz busted out for he 's after a lot more than just gettin out of jail
and whatever it is you 're part of it
i do n't know what you 're talking about
i just wanna see ganz nailed
the bet 's off
that was n't necessary buddy
i got this under control
some of us citizens are with you all the way officer
you made that move huh
while you 're at it you can give me the switchblade too
there
must be billy 's girl
come on
let 's go
wait a minute
maybe these ladies would like to go a few laps with us
how about it
i been nearly three years in prison and
this sucks
a maniac gets hold of my gun and goes all over the streets killing people with it
so instead of me being where i oughta be which is in bed giving my girl the high hard one i 'm out here doing this shit roaming around with some overdressed charcoal colored loser like you
you wanna leave man
let me take care of ganz all by myself
you
do n't make me laugh
you ca n't take care of shit
you 've been dicking me around since we started on this turd hunt
all you 're good for is games
so far what i got outta you is nothin'
i 'm impressed with you too jack you did a real good job of busting up a couple of dykes bedded down for the night
luther knew more than he told me and so do you
now you better tell we what the fuck this is all about
i gave you 48 hours to come up with something and the clock 's runnin
maybe i do n't like the way you ask
who gives a goddamn what you think
you 're just a crook that 's got a weekendpass
you 're not even a name anymore
just a spear- chucker with a goddamn number stenciled on the back of his prison fatigues
yeah right
you want to try again
naw you 'd just call your pals back to bail you out one more time
they saved your ass convict
one thing 's for sure jack
that 's how you 'll tell the story
i been waiting a long time for some money
how much
half a million
jesus
where 's the money
in the trunk of a car
a lot better than under a mattress right
right partner
get this
we ai n't partners
we ai n't brothers
we ai n't friends
if ganz gets away with my money you 're gon na be sorry we ever met
yeah
right
where 's the goddamn car
you 're a real case you know that jack
this'll show you how smart i am
i got it parked
... for three years
let 's hope it was n't a tow away zone
you just drove by it
you son of a bitch
you knew where the money was all along and all we had to do was come here and wait
i almost got my ass blown off twice tonight for nothing
i was n't sure the money was still there until we saw luther
you almost got your ass shot off for nothing once not twice jack
shit
you took a big chance leaving this here all this time
not really
i figured ganz was put down for a long time
and i knew luther would never job me on his own
he 's too chickenshit
guess what
luther just got in line
what
musta got some primo bondsman
jesus christ
that 's a disgrace the guy pulls a gun on a cop and he 's out in 24 hours
i tell you some of the courts these days are just a fucking revolving door
jesus christ look at all the dust on my car
why in the hell do n't he take it to a car wash
did n't know you darker people went in for foreign jobs
i had no choice
some white asshole bought the last piece of shit skyblue cadillac
say do you always work people over like you did luther
if they do n't tell me what i need to know
does n't it get
tiring
i 'm not in this 'cause it 's fun
i 'm not into hitting guys 'cause it makes me feel good either
i do it 'cause it works-
you got a very depressing view of life man
you got ta smile once in awhile
maybe luther hopes ganz'll give him a piece of your money
if he 's hoping that then he 's dumber than i think he is which would be amazin cause i already think he 's real dumb
a long time agb luther must of got the shit beat out of him so bad it just rattled his brain
that would account for him making so many wrong moves in a row
yeah it does n't look like he 's gon na make it as a dangerous tough guy
you know i 'd be embarrassed if i let my wheels go the way you 've done with this job
what you do n't understand is i do n't give a damn about how this thing looks
no class
class is n't somethin' you buy punk
look at you five hundred dollar suit and you 're still a lowlife
we 're getting too close
cates what 's the matter you been takin dumb pills
yeah most cops are pretty dumb
but since you 're the one that landed in jail what 's that make you
that was in style a couple years back man
right
if you ever switch from armed robbery to pimping then you 're all set
bullshit
then i 'm staying with the money
you stay with me
no way
hey jack how ya doin'
what took you so long to call man
i been waitin
i 'm at vroman 's up in the fillmore
yeah vroman 's
course you do n't hang out here it 's for the brothers
i 'll be there in a minute
you do n't move your ass right
we missed
you missed
luther took a taxi to the hotel across the street
made a phone call
maybe we should pay luther a visit
let him get some sleep
he 's going to need it
they must have set up a meeting for the morning luther left an 8 am wake up and put up the do n't disturb sign
he 's trading his girl for the money
all we have to do to grab ganz is not go blind
so you took the rest of the night off
tell me something
why did n't you just take the money off luther and split
forget it
i want ganz as bad as you do and i got some other news for you
i do n't know why but i 'm going to let you keep it
maybe because you told me you had it or maybe just because i 'm too tired to argue
you sure that 's the reason
thanks for callin in
and i guess maybe
look i 'm sorry i called you watermellon nigger
those kinds of things
i was just leanin on ya doin' my job
bein good at your job do n't explain everything jack
yeah
guess not
yeah i see her
i can just take her right across the street to luther 's hotel
all i need is some money for the room
that was quick
when you been in prison three years it do n't take long
let 's go
why
luther 's on the move
notice something funny about that bus
yeah
it missed the last four stops
it 's late they 're closing
do n't worry about it
yeah well the only woman of the indian 's we ran into was shacked up with her dyke girlfriend
i guess she went with him before she came outta the closet
they both looked mad enough to kill him
yeah too bad
they were real nice lookin too
in bed together hardly any clothes one watching tv
do i get to kiss her too
if she 's right and if you do n't screw up
what if your girl 's theory turns out to be bullshit
i mean they could be in rio de janeiro
i 've got to play it rough with them
if they know anything i 'm gon na know it
hey there she is
whatever play i maker just back me up
if we run into billy first let me try and talk him in
sure i 'll give you a shot at it but ganz is mine
you know that big indian plays it for keeps
yeah and i know ganz sure ai n't no sweetheart
i would n't like it if this partnership ended before it gets started
partnership
well you got to admit we come a long way
you okay
yeah
but i was n't there for a second
you did pick a real strange time to go and be brave all on your own
okay reggie start bustin my chops
tell me how great you were with that chick
hey jack real men do n't have to go in for that macho bullshit
but i was fantastic
wait a minute cates
i 've been waitin three years for that
i do n't think it 's fair man
what about the merit system
you were gonnna give me a few thousand
there 's nothin' to talk about
i want to be left alone on this one
algren was killed with my gun
yeah i read the report
hey the bastard 's got my gun
i want it back
jack come on there is an official department policy about cop killings
cop killers represent a special priority because any man crazy enough to kill a cop is a greater threat to an unarmed civilian
in other words we ca n't seen like we 're in the revenge business
i know we all know the truth 's a little different
yeah
anthing botherin you besides losin your gun
yeah
it bothers me when cops get hurt while i 'm makin a play
i do n't like it
you might be more of a team player and a little less of a hot dog on this one jack
being a hot dog 's worked pretty well for me so far
besides i got a lead
okay
you 're not a team player
you got ta do things your own way
fine
nail this guy and make us all look good
but you better watch your ass
if you screw up i can promise you you 're goin' down
you really know how to send a guy out with a great attitude
he starts to go
jack
yeah
try not to get your ass shot to pieces
we got enough dead cops on this one
i 'll keep it in mind
what the bell happened
i lost them that 's what happened
how did they get away
they ran
as fast as they could
caught a train
which one pulled the trigger
the indian
i was about 30 yards away
you could n't get to him
what a screw up
right
i screwed up
i fucked up
i messed up
anybody could have done better especially you
i bet you 're real good at hitting targets through crowds
do n't duck the bullet cates
why did n't you call in for backup instead of makin a grandstand play
i did n't have the time
too bad it would 've covered your ass
now you 're in the shit and so 's the department
in case you have n't noticed this was n't our finest hour
i told you everyone was watchin on this one
maybe you better start thinkin about writin tickets off a three wheel bike
he 's got more brains and more guts in one corner of his asshole than any cop i 've worked with
just cause you say it with conviction do n't mean shit to me
how you gon na take to a pink slip huh
somebody steals your gun you 're supposed to file a report
are you gon na tell me about police procedure
do me a favor do n't give me a bunch of crap
i guess when two cops die on account of your fuck up you want to keep it as quiet as possible
is that what this guy ganz had in the hotel
every last bit of it
the big guy 's room was empty
i 'll help you out
this guy must have had a
44 like yours jack
now he 's got yours
shit
billy bear
backup man from the east bay
worked with ganz a few years ago and sprung him from the road gang
who are all these
they all pulled a bunch of jobs with ganz about four years ago
wait a minute wait a minute
who 's this
uhh
wong henry wong
he was in on the same job
tell me that 's not the same guy
hey
dick tracy
i think i wanna have a discussion about it with any of the ones still walking
can we find them
here 's the file
cates checks the file
one of em 's in the slam
you look awful
so do you
been a long day
long night too from what i heard
word 's going around that in addition to losing ganz for the second time and in addition to haden busting you back to patrolman some jig beat the crap out of you
aw bullshit you heard wrong
does n't look like it
nothing came in for me yet
no calls
nothing
i almost forgot
that pal of yours from the vice squad wants you to call him
what
jesus christ
why the hell did n't you tell me before
i 'm not paid to take your personal calls
he was in some bar
off duty
a cop
i sure ai n't his fairy godmother
now i 'm looking for ganz
where is he
have n't seen him for years
that 's the truth
you just took a shot at me asshole
i think you do know where he is
who gives a fuck what you think
ganz and billy got my girl rosalie
i think i met her
now tell us something we do n't know like where they stashed her
i do n't know
he
he wants me to help him skip town
when
how
i dunno
he 's gon na call me
what am i wanted for
i do n't answer questions i ask 'em
i do n't think your gun 's loaded
this is a
44 magnum the most powerful handgun in the world
you got ta ask yourself just one question
are you feelin lucky
i still do n't think it 's loaded
hey you 're right
you 're hopeless
that 's the way i see it too
you know if you let me come over to your place once in a while you could put on a clean shirt in the morning
what makes you think i have any clean shirts at my place
maybe you ought to buy me one
maybe i would if i knew when you were coming back
that 's a fairly crummy way to start a morning
maybe i got a fairly crummy day ahead
maybe that makes a nice excuse
maybe you do n't know what the hell you 're talking about
when you start with that attitude
it 's like i do n't know who you are
what do you want to know
what difference does it make
i 'm the guy in your bed the last three months
i make you feel good
you make me feel good
what the hell else do you want from a guy
i wish you 'd stop trying to make me mad so i wo n't care for you
i wish you 'd give me a little more of a chance
you know something jack you really are hopeless
that 's the way i see it too
call me later
you sure you want me to
yeah for some reason i 'm sure
thanks for the coffee
i think you forgot this
hands him his wallet and badge
guess people ought to know who i am
great place for lunch
yeah one of my favorites
you made the front page
yeah guess it must have been a slow news day
jack are you okay
sure okay fine no problem
see there 's this kid in jail
first thing i got to do is go up and see what he knows
listen goddamn it if you think i 'm happy about it you 're nuts
i just got ta take care of a few things okay
this is not the way people who care for each other are supposed to behave
i 'm at work asshole
where else
elaine
i
i 'm sorry
i was expecting somebody else
police business
no wonder you 're so popular
no it 's i 'm just surprised you called
so am i.
the number
what 's the goddamn number
jack
what was that
elaine i got ta put you on hold
jack wait
just a second that 's all
hello
hi it 's me
fuck you
hey i do n't believe it
hiya kid
i ought to have you and your friend thrown out
do n't
we 've had a hard night
i can see that
pardon me for saying so but you look like shit
what happened
we and my pal here have been taking it on the chin for the last few hours
you real down
i 've been better
dead end
no ganz no indian
nothing
no sign of ganz
no sign of the indian
airport 's clean
train station
bus station
docks
shit
ganz is going to be hard to track
just a pure schizo
wires all crossed
totally without any pattern
kill anybody
the indian
himself
anybody
how do you know
jack it 's all over the papers
he 's an obvious type
but this indian
how 'd they take it back at headquarters
usual bullshit
you make one smart move and everybody wants to be your friend
you know somethin' shootin guys sucks
especially compared to this
i 've been waiting a long time to hear you say that
yeah bein a hard ass all the time is a real drag but it works
three more hours
where is he
promised i 'd turn my back while he
ah never mind
tell me
he 's takin care of the same business i 'll be takin care of soon as i dry off
you 're impossible
that 's what i always say
who the hell are you
name 's hammond reggie hammond
i heard a lot about you
and any friend of jack 's is a friend of mine
i 'm not so sure i can say the same thing
you do n't look like a cop
well i been workin the other side of the street for the last few years
and you do n't exactly look like a shrink wearin that dress
shrink major not a shrink
hard man to live with
how would you know
hey two days with him is enough
that 's no bull
he was the only one of my bunch that was my friend
he was loyal went all the way for you
in all due respect he sounds kind of pathetic to me
the kind of guy that runs home to his momma or some girlfriend
have you two ace detectives checked that out
hey
shut up
what the hell 's wrong
i did n't do anything
keep stallin
alright i 'm coming
hold on
how hot are they
hot
hey they 're not even room temperature
how ya doin'
ca n't complain
we got a lot to talk about
yeah old times
we 'll follow you
take it slow okay
sure right
surprise luther
whaddya want
i thought you were locked up-
i want the money asshole what do you think
the money that reggie hid
i do n't know what you 're talkin about
you want that indian to snap her neck
instead of worryin about reggie you better worry about me
do n't give me this we were partners
billy go ahead break it
no
do n't kill her
i can get you the money
when
i ca n't get it until monday
honest
you chickenshit punk
honest
the place we stashed it opens monday morning
i ca n't get it till then
monday morning that 's when it opens
after that i 'll get the money to you right away
come on you can trust me
please
you try to mess with us or go to the cops i promise you i 'll put holes in her you would n't believe
let her go
first the money
rosalie you okay
what are you talkin about
i said i would n't hurt her
you sure
i 'm sure
everybody here 's looking at everybody else 's ass
how about some ammo
it 's loaded
i got some shells in here
how much
this is clean shit
no serial numbers and never been used
do n't mess with me
how much
five bills
five
on credit
this ai n't a credit business
yeah i know that but this is me and we 're old friends
i have n't got the money so what are you gon na do about it
give it back
try and take it
fuck you
you got no right for this kind of play
i 'll got your money to you
no sweat
appipulai leeloo minai
corn i lius
at your service
what 're you laughing about
napoleon
small
the case
with the stones
where is it
san agamat chay bet
envolet
the case was stolen
akta dedero ansila do mektet
i ca n't pretend to be your husband
david 's in great shape
... we 're saved
i 'm fucked
zorg
jean baptiste emmanuel zorg
nice to see you again
i remember you now
the so called art dealer
i 'm glad you got your memory back father
because you 're going to need it
where are the stones
... why on earth do the stones interest you
personally they are of no interest to me i 'd rather sell weapons
but i have a customer
so tell me
even it i did know where the stones were i would never tell somebody like you
why
what 's wrong with me
... i 'm a priest
i 'm here to serve life all you want to do is destroy it
ah father
you are so wrong
let me explain
... would you like a drink
no thank you
follow me
life which you so nobly serve comes from destruction
look at this empty glass
... look at all these little things
so busy all of a sudden
notice how each one is useful
what a lovely ballet so full of form and color
so full of
life
they are robots
father by creating a little destruction i am in fact encouraging life
so in reality you and i are in the same business
destroying a glass is one thing
killing people with the weapons you produce is quite another
let me reassure you father
i will never kill more people in my entire life than religion has killed in the last 2000 years
you are a monster zorg
i know
excuse me i 'm looking for a priest
weddings are one floor down
congratulations
he 's a she
you noticed
there 's not a moment to lose
wake her up but be gentle about it
this woman is mankind 's most precious possession
she is
perfect
so you do know her
uh yes we 're cousins
distant cousins
they all like this in your family father
she 's an exception
thank you so much for your help mr
dallas
korben dallas
yes
that 's fine
thank you very much
a thousand times over
i might call to check up on her you know
to see if she 's better
she 's fine really
don't you worry
just needs some rest
she 's had a very long trip
i know
i was there when she arrived
excuse me
just one thing
she said something to me a while ago and
i do n't really get it
akta gamat
it means never without my permission
that 's what i thought
i 'm sorry to have to resort to such methods but we heard about your good luck on he radio and we need the tickets to fhloston
is that the usual way priests go on vacation
we 're not going on vacation
we're on a mission
what kind of mission
we have to save the world
good luck
of course
father i was in the army for awhile and every time they told us we were on a mission to save the world the only thing that changed was i lost a lot of friends
so thanks for the offer
but no thanks
what are you doing
trying to save your ass so you can save the world
you 're probably very angry with me and i quite understand
but i want you to know i 'm fighting for a noble cause
yeah i know
to save the world
but right now all i want to do is save leeloo
leeloo 's in trouble
when is she not in trouble
uh
have you tried the diva 's suite
do n't tell me you do n't know how all this works
theoretically yes
the four stones form the beam and the fifth element is supposed to stand in the middle there but
i do n't have the reference book
i 've never seen the stones work
your theory is interesting father but i do n't think we have time to go into it right now
time is of no importance mr. president
only life is important
that 's exactly what we are going to try and do protect the lives of some 200 billion of our fellow citizens
general
you may fire when ready
we have forty eight hours the time it needs to adapt itself to our living conditions
and then
and then it will be too late
the goal of evil is to wipe out life
all forms of life
for all eternity
life upsets it
is there anything that can stop it
yes
thank god
but what happens if instead of this
ultimate warrior
it is evil who stands here
white turns to black
light to dark
life to death
for all eternity
did you see that
thing
swallow our battleship like a gum drop
you ca n't even tell me what it is
i ask you for options you give me bullshit
give them permission to enter our territories with my warmest regards
thank you mr. president
what are we going to do
this is government business now
you ought to go home and get some rest father
it 's a miracle
what is
i ca n't wear these clothes
this calls for dignity
i have to dress the part
father will you please explain what 's going on
the supreme being the fifth element is here in our parish
it 's a miracle
uh father i know she 's been through a lot
but the sacred stones
we do n't have much time
yes
of course
there was this guy with a limp who came a month ago
said he was an art dealer
asking all these questions about the sacred stones
at the time i did n't think anything of it
what was his name
i 'm so bad with names
i did n't know your size
they really made her
perfect
i got it
everything here we need to know about fhloston paradise hotel
and a detailed blueprint of the entire hotel
good work my son
now all we need is a way to get there
where 's leeloo
on the plane
with mr. dallas
the real one
it 's all my fault
i 'm the servant
it 's my mission
here
you 're all safe
thanks be to god
later david
later
there 's not a minute to lose
you 're a good man
she was right to have chosen you
who
the fifth element
the supreme being
your wife
leeloo
is
she 's
yes and more than that
you must give her the stones she 's the only one who knows how to use them
... so cornelius was telling the truth
yeah
hey bud
finger here
i love you too major but you have n't called me that since basic training
i was talking to the cat
oh yeah i forgot
you still prefer your cat to the real thing
at least the cat comes back
you still pining for that two timing bitch
forget her
there are a million women out there
i do n't want a million i just want one
a perfect one
do n't exist bud
i just found a picture of you
how do i look
like shit
i do n't need one
you forgetting who sat next to you for a thousand missions
i know how you drive
finger
i 'm driving a cab now not a space fighter
how many points you got left on your license
uh
at least fifty
in your dreams
see you tonight
hello
hey bud
i'm waiting all day here
finger
man
i'm sorry
listen
i was on the way over but i had a fare fall into my lap
y'know one of those big fares you just ca n't resist
so just how big was this fare
5'7 green eyes
long legs
great skin
perfect
uh huh
and i do n't suppose you got the name of this
perfect fare
leeloo
akina delutan nou shan
... scuse me
vito
cor
ni lious
priest
vito cornelius
eto akta gamat
i 'm sorry it 's just that
i was told to wake you up gently so i figured
... what 's your name
leeloo minai lekarariba laminai tchai ekbat de sebat
hey that 's
cute
do you have a nickname something a little
shorter
... leeloo
the fifth element
take them and put them in a safe place
will the elements be gone now forever from this place
when mankind comes to its senses
we will return
knowing mankind as i do that could take centuries
time is of no importance only life is important
when evil returns so shall we
we will be ready lord
... hello
you 're the nastiest dirtbag i know in this stinking city
hi ma
i 've been playing twice a week for 20 years 20 years i 've been eating those shitty croquettes
are you listening to me you ingrate
yes ma
you just won a trip you dolt
ten days in fhloston paradise for two
ma
if i 'd won i 'd know about it
someone would have notified me
they 've been blaring out your name on the radio for the last hour blockhead
yeah
have you pulled yourself together
... not yet
hello
you little sleaze bag
... ma
do n't you ever ask me for another thing in my life again you 've killed your poor mother with your own hands
welcome on board mr. dallas
how you doing this morning
sleep ok
i did n't
fuel level 6.03
propulsion 2x4
i had the worst goddamn nightmare
you have nine points left on your license
thanks for reminding me
i 'm sorry
this is a police control action
30 seconds
anyone know how to release the lines on this crate
6
5
found it
i did n't come here to play dumbo on the radio
so tomorrow between 5 and 7 give yourself a hand that clear pal
crystal
my main man
please do n't leave me here alone
my head 's killing me and my adoring fans are gon na tear me apart
get me outta here
i 'll take you to the bar after that you 're on your own
oh yes
do that
you treat me right man
tell me all about yourself your roots your personal life your childhood dreams
i do n't think this is a good time
... you got brothers and sisters
what about your dad
tell me about your dad
what was he like
physically
big i suppose
yeah very big a giant
i did n't have a dad
never saw him
never even heard him
50 billion people listen to me every day
and he does n't hear me
you do n't do what i say
i 'll waste you myself
got it
got it
six to the left
one to the right
he 's on vacation
we got to find the leader
mangalores do n't fight without a leader
maybe we oughta be going what do you think
not without leeloo
like korben can i have 30 seconds of your time here
i 'll be right back
you know how to fly this thing
it 's like a cab is n't it
i do n't even know what i 'm looking for
fuck it
hold tight
is that all
yeah
then i sighed
like this
major dallas if our calculations are correct you still have 57 hours owed to the federal army on your enlistment which is more than you will need for a mission of the utmost importance
what mission
to save the world
where have i heard this song before
you 're to leave immediately for fhloston paradise
retrieve four stones from the diva plavalaguna
and bring them back with the utmost discretion as possible
any questions
just one
why me
three reasons
one as part of the elite special forces unit of the federated army you are an expert in the use of all weapons and spacecraft needed for this mission
two of all the members of your unit you were the most highly decorated
and the third one
you 're the only one left alive
do n't you open your messages
i 've had enough good news for today
you have won the annual gemini contest and a trip to fhloston paradise
for two
congratulations
here are your tickets
you could n't come up with something a little more discreet
old tricks are the best tricks eh
i 'm not going
why not
one reason
i want to stay the only one left alive
... shit
what is it
it 's my wife
i thought you were divorced
i mean my future
my ex
my future ex
if she sees you here i 'm finished
she hates you guys
it 's what killed us in the first place
please
... sorry general but we 've got no choice
it 'll only take a minute
let me set up another meeting and i 'll be back
three of us will never fit in there
oh yes you will
you hear that
cornelius
oh god
dinoine chagantakat
took the words right out of my mouth
go on
i 'll be right with you
it 's our honeymoon
we 're going to use the trip to get to know each other better
apipoulai
not hard to find you
just follow the chaos
love
yes
but love is n't the operative word here peace is
sometimes you ca n't learn everything from a screen
sometimes it 's better to ask someone who has experience
what is
make love
finished what
learning language
which one
all 900
you learned 900 languages in five minutes
yes
now it 's your turn
i learned your language you have to learn mine
i know how to say hello
teach me how to say good bye that 's all i need
apipoussan
apipoussan
good
do you know how we say make love
uh
... hoppi hoppa
here we go again
you know women normally change five times more than men
you get that off the screen
yes
you know there 's a lot of differences between men women
you noticed
ok you can turn around
you 're nothing but a
a
the words you 're looking for were n't in the dictionary you studied
i wo n't be long
i 'm so very sad
why
we did pretty well would n't you say
five hundred wars
arms
drugs
money
everything you create is used to destroy
i told you not to read all that crap
protect life
until death
leeloo
the stones
we have to open them
how does it work
the wind blows
the fire burns
i know all that leeloo
i 'm talking about the stones
... the rain falls
it 's up to you now angel
i 'm so tired
you can sleep tomorrow
come on
i want to sleep
forever
leeloo
listen to me
i 'll take you on a vacation afterwards
a real vacation this time for as long as you want
come on
you can do it
what 's the use of saving lives
when you see what you do with them
you 're right but there are lots of good things
beautiful things
... like love
exactly
but i do n't know love
i 'm like a machine programmed to save other people 's lives but never to have one of my own
i have thousands of memories but none of them are mine
there is no need for me other than this
i 'm immortal but i have no life
yes you do
i need you
more than you can imagine
stand up straight
why
why would you need me
because
tell me
i love you
not going to open
i 've never gotten a message that was n't bad news
how someone strong like you scared from a message
is good news i sure
the last two messages i got
the first one was from my wife telling me she was leaving
and the second was from my lawyer telling me he was leaving too
with my wife
you right that is bad
but mathematically luck must change
grandfather say it never rain every day
this is good news guarantee
i bet you lunch
is n't that a z140
alleviated titanium
neuro charged assault model
uh
you know you could hurt someone with this puppy
good thing it 's not loaded
it 's not
you got ta push the little yellow button
thanks
you 're welcome
this is all that survived
actually only one cell survived
have you identified it
it 's not that easy
we've never encountered anything like it before
you see normal human beings have 40 dna memo groums
which is more than enough for any species to perpetuate itself
this one has 200,000
talk english doc
this cell is like a huge library
it has infinite genetic knowledge stored inside
almost like it was
engineered
sounds like a freak of nature to me
yes
i ca n't wait to meet him
the compositional elements of his dna chain are the same as ours there are simply more of them tightly packed
his knowledge is probably limitless
is there any danger
some kind of virus
we put it through the cellular hygiene detector
the cell is for lack of a better word
perfect
... this is the crucial phase the reconstruction of pigment
cells are bombarded with slightly greasy solar atoms which forces the body cells to react to protect themselves
that means growing skin
clever eh
wonderful
this thing solid
an elephant could n't crack it
mr. president let me introduce you to professor mactilburgh who runs the center
it 's an honor to receive you
mr. president
they just landed in the desert
how much time is left
staedert do you read me
i can hear you mr. president but i ca n't see you
is that better
perfect mr. president
i have to address the supreme council in 10 minutes
just the facts general
there are no results from the chemical and molecular analysis as of yet all the calibers are overshot
we're hoping a thermo nucleatic imaging
what you are saying is you do n't know what this
thing
is
not yet sir
the only thing we know is it just keeps getting bigger
options
wait or act
recommendations
my philosophy mr. president is shoot first ask questions later
i do n't like uninvited guests
gentlemen
staedert
what 's going on
did you destroy it
i 'm about to mr. president
lord forgive me
they already know too much
in which all the history of the universe resides
all the strength
all the hope
protect us from evil
amen
father
it in the most extraordinary thing
the greatest find in history
can you imagine the implications
only too well
here you must be parched
a weapon against evil
amazing
i am going to be famous
then let us toast to your fame
here billy
am i disturbing you
no
not at all
where are you
... not far now
really
maybe i can get you on my screen and see you at last
do you have the picture now mr. zorg
got it
how 's our deal coming along
fine just fine
i 'll have the 4 pieces you asked for any time now
but it was n't easy
my costs have tripled
the stones will be here
i 'll see to it personally
... i ca n't wait to be among you
welcome home
do you know how much i missed you
what 's this
have you been smoking
smoking
i 'm not smoking
your clothing reeks of it
you know amy i 've been sitting around in bars and everywhere following this guy
i mean is this what i get first thing
before you even hello you accuse me
i 'm not accusing you
well i 'm not smoking okay
okay i believe you
we 've been all through that
i 've been on my best behavior
how 's the detective business
business was fine
i 'll tell you what you could n't pay me enough to live down there
you better not be smoking that 's all i can say
honey i 'm not please
i love you
i love you
hello
amy it 's me
listen very carefully
tom
where have you been
amy just listen
take cindy and get out of the house
do it now
go to a hotel and stay there
what 's wrong
are you alright
i 'm okay
please honey i ca n't explain
do n't use the phone just pack a bag and get out
i 'm on my way
i 'll be back at the house in three hours
call me from the hotel when you get there
... what 's going on
just do it amy please go
what happened to you
i 'm okay honey i 'm okay
are you alright
what 's going on tom
what happened
i ca n't tell you amy
you know i ca n't
you have to trust me
tom
it has to be this way for now
it wo n't be long
why have n't you called
why do n't you answer your phone
i do n't know
i 'm sorry
you 're sorry
what was i supposed to think
you owe me an explanation
you ca n't treat me like this
i wanted to call
i could n't
you could n't
you do n't understand
no i do n't because you 're not telling me anything
i was in hell
if i called you
if i heard your voice
it would have been so easy for me to quit
i could n't do that
you should have
amy i 'm not going to let anything happen to us
look where we are
look at yourself
you son of a bitch you do n't have any idea what you 're putting me through
i do n't know what to say
you 're killing me
do n't
what was i supposed to think happened to you
amy
who are you calling
mrs. christian
what
she 's all i 've got
she 's the only witness
tom
she 's dead
she died in her sleep three days ago
it was in the paper
i just talked to her
what do you want
i just got a call
two seconds ago some motherfucker called
says he knows about the loop
what are you talking about
the loop
the girl we did what the fuck do you think i 'm talking about
this guy calls and says he knows about the fucking loop
bullshit
i 'm telling you
blow me you paranoid fuck that 's impossible
why are you bothering me with this
because somebody just fucking called me and fucking laid it out
there 's nothing there you brain- dead cunt
think about it
there 's absolutely no way in this world to connect us to anything
i want you to hang the phone up and if you call me about this again i 'm going to send a friend of mine out there and have him crack you open with a fucking rib spreader
dino
nobody knows anything
what the fuck
i promised him to machine
it 's an honor to meet you
thank you for seeing us
what can i do for you today
i 'd like to commission a work
i 'm a great admirer of yours
flattering
and who 's your colorful little chum
a fellow investor
hmm
you said something about money
yes
what we 're looking for is rather specific
that 's five thousand dollars
is it
five thousand now five thousand on delivery
two women one white and one black as long as they have large breasts
hard bondage or course
other than that trusting your artistic interpretation i have only two stipulations
and they are
i want to watch you work
i 'll consider it
and the other performer
it has to be that monster you use
the man in the mask
machine
if it 's not him there 's no deal
he might be interested
but it would mean another five thousand
we can do that
well well i 'll have to put my thinking cap on about all this
you 'll leave the money as a deposit
very good
you have a beautiful face
the way the light hits it
i 'd like to take your picture
you do n't mind
i 'd rather you did n't
what 's the problem
i 'm camera shy
you trust me to keep your money but not to take your picture
those are two different kinds of trust
thank you for your time
i hope we can do business
you brought the money
right here
excellent
where are the women
they should be here any minute
what are these for
hmm
oh the knifes
they 're just props
nice are n't they
sure
mister welles
would you be so kind as to remove any firearms from your person
what are you
take out your gun
empty the gun onto the table very carefully
look i do n't know what this
shut up cunt
do exactly as i say or i 'll put this arrow through your throat
you remember mr. longdale do n't you
i remember him
friend of yours
look he 's got nothing to do with this
let him go
can you guess what i 'm going to say next
he does n't know anything
he 's got nothing to do with this
bring the film or we kill him
i 'll get it
it 's in a safe deposit box in the city
how cooperative
longdale will keep you company
you 're a dead man
leave him alone
fuck off
... sorry
first things first
you might want to watch this mr. welles
you got the guts tough guy
gon na kill us all is that it
you betrayed us
what can i do for you mr. welles
call me tom
alright tom
what i 'd like very simply is access to your archive
and now i understand this is n't something you normally do for private citizens
there are reasons for the way we do things here
absolutely
of course i 'll abide by whatever decision you make but i 'd appreciate if you 'll hear me out
few days ago i was contacted by a couple living in philadelphia a doctor and his wife
what happened was they picked up a young girl hitchhiking off 81 which heads into philadelphia started up a conversation with this girl she looked homeless seemed about eighteen maybe
they convinced her to let them buy her a meal in the city
nice kid mature did n't have much to say but they got a sense she 's a runaway so all through dinner the doctor 's working on her trying to convince her that at the very least she should pick up a telephone
not surprisingly she ate her food excused herself
that 's the last they saw her
the reason they came to me for help the reason i 'm coming to you is we had a friend of mine in the department work up a sketch
they want to see if i can i.d. this girl somehow pass along a message to let the parents know the kid 's alive doing alright
why not go to the n.c.i.c. or n.c.m.e.c.
i figured you share information
we do
for whatever reasons i thought you might be more receptive
why do n't they come to me
this doctor and wife they 're nice people but they do n't want to get too involved
they 're not trying to have the parents come looking for the girl either
you and i both know sometimes not often but sometimes there 's real reasons why a kid'll run
molestation whatever
besides that the girl 's probably eighteen so she 's legal
i 'm not so sure about this
they 're putting themselves in place of this kid 's parents and thinking they 'd want to hear their girl 's okay even if that 's all they hear
i can give you my card if your clients want to call me
they were pretty clear they did n't want this coming back on them
well that 's all i can do
sorry
files are mostly by state and year of disappearance
we try to keep the children and adults separate
no eating or smoking in here but there 's a coffee machine in the hall
any good
it 's horrible but it 'll be your best friend after a few days
i hope you realize what kind of long shot you 're chasing after
you 're gon na be seeing a lot of me
you 're sure you do n't mind
it 's good what you 're doing
celebrity films
eddie
yeah who 's this
i know what you did
what
i know what you did
who is this
you murdered that girl eddie
six years ago
what the fuck are you
you killed that girl and you put it on film
you and your pals you 're fucked
you fucked up real good
do n't ask questions
fuck you
starting to recognize a pattern
what do you want
who is machine
i do n't know
i want his name
i told you i do n't know
i will never get tired of hurting you eddie so you might want to change your attitude
what the fuck am i gon na protect that freak for
he was dino 's boy not mine
he shows up with his mask on leaves with his mask on
nobody knows
okay we 'll come back to that
so six years ago a guy contacts you through the classifieds over the phone however he does it
it 's longdale looking for a snuff film
and you entrepreneur that you are tell him you can hook him up
yeah the fucking lawyer
told him you could get him a snuff film
yeah
how much did he pay you
thirty thousand each that fucking cocksucker
that 's all
thirty each
that 's all it took for you to murder her
it was a lot of fucking money
so
you brought dino in and he brought machine
and one day a girl walked into your office because you had an ad in the paper for models
and she never walked out
something like that
what did you do knock her out shoot her up
what the fuck do you want from me
i want to know
i want to know exactly what you did to her
fuck you then you want to know
i talked her up told her how beautiful she was told her she was gon na be a star
i told her i was gon na get her a screen test and while i 'm doing that i got her a soda and dropped a mickey
when it was dark enough i rang dino and told him it was go time i put her in the trunk of my car and we went and we fucking did it
that 's what happened
she 's dead
she 's been dead a long fucking time
nobody fucking cares
show me where you did it on the map exactly where you did it
why
because we 're going there
i do n't know
i felt like it
i never saw anyone get done before
you enjoy it
made me sick but what did i care
what did i care if some hump wants to beat off to that
it was just something i was doing for money
tell me what happened
what do you want to know
you saw it you saw the loop
nobody saw you bring her in
there was n't nobody around
this place was a shit hole
i backed up the car to the door and we carried her in like groceries
dino made her eat a bunch of pills we laid out the plastic put film in the camera and machine went to work
what did you do with her body
took it out the bathroom window
buried it in the woods
show me
keep moving
where do you think you 're taking this huh
gon na be a big hero avenge that little girl 's death
gon na make everything right with the world
how you gon na do that
you ca n't go to the cops
all you can do is cut me loose and walk away because you got nothing
stop talking
you got absolute zero
show me where you buried her
i do n't know
out there somewhere
where
show me where
i fucking do n't know
what do you think
we were n't burying treasure
we did n't pace it out so we could come back and get it
we dug a hole and we put her in it
your guess is as good as mine
yes i do have something to say
i insisted on being here as soon as i heard mrs. christian contacted you
i 'm listening
as mr. christian 's attorney and one of the executors of his estate it concerns me that a meeting of this sort should take place without my being asked to attend
of what sort
you are a private investigator
that 's right
well whatever reasons mrs. christian has for engaging the services of a private investigator i should certainly be a party to
but since she feels differently i can only go on the record as having expressed my adamant disapproval
you were the middleman am i right
old man christian was n't about to go shopping for a snuff film himself
would n't exactly have been possible for a man of his stature
so he sent you gave you the money his errand boy
and if you refused it was n't like you could tell anyone your pervert boss just asked you to get him a snuff film
that 's the beauty of lawyer client privilege
that 's trust
mr. christian trusted me implicitly
must have paid you a lot for you to risk everything
would 've had to have cut yourself a real nice piece of money
i was well compensated
that 's why you got scared when mrs. christian hired me
you knew about the film figured it had to be in that safe
how 'd you find me
never mind how i found you
followed me
must have freaked out when you saw me closing in on your buddies
they 're no friends of mine
except you 're willing commit murder with them
none of this would be happening if you would have left it alone
if you were n't digging up a girl who died six years ago
a girl no one even remembers
mary anne mathews that was her name
her mom remembers her
you found these smut dealers and asked to buy a snuff film right
wanted them to find you one
well they did n't find you one longdale they went out and made you one
shut up
mary anne mathews was alive till you paid money to have her murdered
shut your mouth and drive
did it get him off huh watching them cut her up
tell me because i really want to understand
did he jerk off to it
you watch it with him sit there giving him a handjob while you both watched
you 're making me very angry
just tell me
tell me some more of the secrets you and christian shared
what kind of degenerate pervert was he really
what the fuck did he want with a snuff film
you 're asking me why
i 'm asking
a man like mr. christian a great man
all his money all his power
a man who attained everything there was to attain
why did he buy a film of some poor lost girl getting butchered
is n't it incredibly obvious
enlighten me
because he could
he did it because he could
what other reason were you looking for
you almost went over your limit
fuck you
give me the film
you 'll get it when we get there
give me the film
go ahead shoot me
then try driving to brooklyn with my brains all over the windshield
once you pick it up you ca n't put it down
catchy title
what are you really reading
hard to believe that book 's got any parts worth highlighting
truman capote
i tear off the cover and paste this one on
you know how it is
would n't want to embarrass yourself in front of your fellow perverts
might get drummed out of the pornographer 's union and then where would i be
remember me
came back for that battery operated vagina right
told you you would
i need some information
thought you might be able to help
thomas welles
nice picture
i do n't know what you 're looking for mister but so we 're clear from the start i 'm straight
good for you
how long you been working there
three four years
what 's your name if you do n't mind me asking
max
well here 's the deal max
this thing i 'm on right now has something to do with underground pornography
stuff that 's sold under the counter illegally
there 's not much illegal
well whatever there is whoever 's dealing however it 's done i want to know
i want a good look so if you 've got that kind of connection great
if not speak now
you 're not a cop are you
if i ask and you are you have to tell me
i 'm not a cop
you 're a private eye
like shaft
not quite
from pennsylvania
p.i. from pa
what are you doing out here
well there 's the thing you 're not gon na know anything about what i 'm doing but you can make some money
how much
how much do you make now
four hundred a week off the books
okay let 's pretend i live in the same fantasy world where you make four hundred a week in that dump
i 'll give you six hundred for a few days
sounds good pops
here 's my number if you need it
when can you start
tomorrow night i get off at eight
see you then
oh and do n't call me pops
... hello
wake up pops
your education begins tonight
you 've got penthouse playboy hustler etc
nobody even considers them pornography anymore
then there 's mainstream hardcore
triple x. the difference is penetration
that 's hardcore
that whole industry 's up in the valley
writers directors porn stars
they 're celebrities or they think they are
they pump out 150 videos a week
a week
they 've even got a porno academy awards
america loves pornography
anybody tells you they never use pornography they 're lying
somebody 's buying those videos
somebody 's out there spending 900 million dollars a year on phone sex
know what else
it 's only gon na get worse
more and more you 'll see perverse hardcore coming into the mainstream because that 's evolution
desensitization
oh my god elvis presley 's wiggling his hips how offensive
nowadays mtv 's showing girls dancing around in thong bikinis with their asses hanging out
know what i mean
for the porn addict big tits are n't big enough after a while
they have to be the biggest tits ever
some porn chicks are putting in breast implants bigger than your head literally
soon playboy is gon na be penthouse penthouse'll be hustler hustler'll be hardcore and hardcore films'll be medical films
people'll be jerking off to women laying around with open wounds
there 's nowhere else for it to go
interesting theory
what you saw tonight we 're not talking about a video some dentist takes home over the weekend
we 're talking about stuff where people get hurt
specialty product
child pornography
there 's two kinds of specialty product legal and illegal
foot fetish shit films watersports bondage spanking fisting she- males hemaphrodites
it 's beyond hardcore but legal
this is the kind of hardcore where one guy 's going to look at it and throw up another guy looks at it and falls in love
now with some of the s+m and bondage films they straddle the line
how are you supposed to tell if the person tied up with the ball gag in their mouth is a consenting or not
step over that line you 're into kiddie porn
rape films but there are n't many
i 've never seen one
snuff films
i heard you asking
that guy was n't yanking you around
there 's no such thing
what other ways are there to get illegal films
who do you see
first of all basement sales like tonight are n't gon na last much longer
it 's too risky one and two everything 's going on the internet
anyone with a computer and enough patience can find anything he wants
it 's heaven for those degenerate chicken hawks
they 're swapping pictures back and forth as fast as their modems can zap 'em
but there 's still some weird shit under the counter where i work sometimes
no one knows where it comes from
that 's local underground where information spreads by word of mouth
those are zombies hardcore junkies
their hands are permanently pruned
they go out in the sun they do n't burn they blister
other than that all i know about is the mail
classified ads in the paper with hidden codes
secret couriers
credit card orders to dummy corporations
interstate wire transfers
revolving p.o. boxes
but if you 're asking me who do you go to to get illegal shit
who knows
that 's the whole point -- the seller stays as far away from the buyer as possible and vice versa and cops ca n't trace the deal
there 's ways to do it so nobody knows who anybody is
you did n't say it was gon na be this luxurious
it 's their presidential suite
great
oh come on man what are we doing in this flea bag
it 's cheap and people know to mind their own business
what have you got for me
wha
who is this in the mask
who is he
who is he
i told you he 's one of dino velvet 's stock players
who is he his name
nobody knows his name
that 's his thing
he always wears a mask
you never see his face
he calls himself machine that 's what they call him
machine
you do n't need to be here
what kind of junior p.i. would i be if i did n't go with you
i know if i had to pick it 'd be choke or devil
devil frightened me as much as it excited me but i 'd be hard pressed to choose a favorite
what 's next
i 'm trying to figure that out myself
i have to see machine without his mask
still do n't want to tell me what you 're doing
nope
what 's this
it 's money
people use it to purchase goods and services
uh huh pleasure
apparently mr. longdale has something he feels he simply must say before you and i speak
have a pleasant evening
will you have tea mister welles
thank you
he 's odd
he 's a lawyer
please sit here
i 've spoken to friends of mine and my husband 's in harrisburg in lancaster and hershey
asking about you
i must say you have friends in influential places
i 've been privileged to provide services for people i admire
you are highly recommended
praised for your discretion
your strict adherence to confidentiality
as you know my husband passed away recently
two weeks ago now
my condolences
his passing has left me with
something of a dilemma
a terrible terrible dilemma
i 'll do whatever i can to help
pittsburgh
mostly
that 's where he started his empire building
he was a good man
notorious as an eccentric but that was something he cultivated
he wanted to be legendary
he succeeded
we were married forty five years
hard even for me to imagine
we had our troubles
there were plenty of places for him to be other than here but he was always loyal to me and i to him
i loved him deeply
do you carry a gun mr. welles
i wear a gun when i can tell a client expects me to
other than that there 's never any reason
just curious
my husband was the only one with the combination to this safe
i knew about it but as far as i was concerned it was none of my business
not till now that is
you hired someone to open it
i 'll bet the lawyer loved that
there was nothing he could do
my husband left everything to me
i prevented anyone from seeing the contents
i felt these were my husband 's private things
i did n't
i did n't realize
do you want to tell me what you found
cash stock certificates and this
please believe me
this is probably a stag film
simulated rape
hard to stomach and it might seem real but there are ways of making it look realistic
fake blood and special effects
no
if you were to study it you 'd see the camera cutting away
you 'd see the tricks they can play
i 'm telling you it 's not that
i 'm sure it is
it 's probably something your husband was given as a bad joke
more than likely he never even watched it
will you watch it and see for yourself
of course
but i 'm certain it 's nothing to worry about
you
you need to go to the police
i told you i ca n't not yet
you do n't have any other choice
no
for me to live with the ruin of my husband 's name i need know that whoever did this will be punished
if you can find them i will take their names to the police
i 'll say my husband confessed on his death bed
i 'll say i did n't have courage to come forward at first
it wo n't work like that
any evidence you collect can be given to the police later anonymously
i 've thought about it and there 's no other way
if you ca n't find them
if the only thing that comes from this film is that this is all my husband will be remembered for well i ca n't let that happen
i 'm telling you i wo n't
if there 's no chance that poor girl 's memory can be served then i 'll just have to spend my last days trying to forget her
i deal in divorce cases
corporate investigations
you 've found missing persons before
nothing remotely like this
i know what i 'm asking
your compensation will be appropriate to the risk
you 'll need cash to buy information and i 'll provide it
i feel responsible mr. welles
you saw what he did to her
okay
my husband never dealt with money personally certainly not cash
i 'm not positive this means anything
the checks were for odd amounts
one was for two hundred thousand one dollar and thirteen cents
another was for three hundred thousand six hundred fifty four dollars and seventy six cents
okay i follow you so far
totalled together these five checks from five different accounts they equal one million dollars
you 're joking
to the penny
exactly one million dollars in cash
hello
i 'm here
do you think the film could have cost that much
for a human life
murder on film no statute of limitations
who knows
it sure could have
i 'd like you to overnight me a copy of those checks then put them in a safe deposit box
okay
send it to me through the post office like we arranged
no return address
you dug this up all by yourself
you told me to look so i looked
you 're one hell of a detective mrs. christian
hello
mrs. christian tom welles here
how are you
having any luck
i do n't know if luck 's the word
are you feeling alright
i 've been ordered into bed
the doctor says i 've gotten the flu or some other wretched ailment
i hope it 's nothing serious
nothing more than a bother
have you any news for me
i 've made progress
i 'm in manhattan
once a few more pieces fall into place i 'll drive to you and give you an update
fine
i 've got about five thousand left in cash but i 'll need another thirty if you approve
how will i get it to you
if you have a pencil and paper i 'll tell you how to send it
what was the name
i 've got it here somewhere
neil
neil cole
right agent cole told me he 'd call and let you know to expect me
he did n't call
no
well i 'm following up on your daughter mary height five four weight hundred ten pounds brown eyes blonde hair
born april 24 1976
missing june 11th 1992
a runaway that 's how she 's listed
is this information correct
it 's very important you do n't let this raise your expectations
it 's not going to effect any ongoing efforts
all i 'm saying is please know i 'm not here to create any false hope
they hired you
you 're like a private detective
that 's exactly what i am
i did n't think there were private detectives anymore except on tv
you probably expect me to be wearing a trench coat and a hat
drinking whiskey chasing women and getting beaten up by guys with broken noses
want to know what it 's really like
it 's sitting in a car and staring at a hotel window for three days straight pissing in a plastic bottle pardon me because some guy thinks his wife 's cheating on him
glamorous huh
and the guy who hired you he has a hair lip dandruff and crooked teeth and you could have told him the minute you laid eyes on him his wife 's cheating and you do n't blame her
so she did n't leave a note
she never gave any indication where she might go before she left
no
she just seemed
depressed
she did n't seem herself
for months there never was any way to get her to talk about it
one night we went to bed
the next morning she was gone
she took some clothes
what was she running from
i do n't know
if there 's anything you feel uncomfortable talking about tell me but i have to ask
your husband
he committed suicide
yes
september 4th 1993
about a year after mary disappeared
we were divorced by then
things fell apart
he was living with a friend
why do you think he did it
it got to be too much for him
you have to forgive me but in these circumstances
with your daughter
were there any indications of
any sort of abuse
there was n't anything like that
the police and the fbi people asked but there was n't anything happened like that never
my husband
his heart broke when mary left
i did n't mean to
you try going through what we did
bob could n't take it that 's all
christ there 's times when it still seems like i ca n't either
i had to ask
i apologize
no one knows what it 's like
you ca n't even imagine how much it hurts
people remember me from the news
can you drive me back now
of course
i
i should n't take anymore of your time
maybe we can finish tomorrow
i 'll call tomorrow
okay
does n't make much sense does it
when everything 's happy when life 's fine and you have every reason to believe there 's a god you do n't bother
then something horrible happens
that 's when you start praying all the time
that 's when you start going to church
we 're all like that
are you religious
no
you should be
i 've got what i need for my report
there is
there is one thing that bothers me though
what
it 's not really my place but it 's not easy for me to set aside the private detective part of me either
see i know a little about missing persons
when kids run they almost always leave a note
it 's guilt
they want to say goodbye
there was n't one
the police looked
do you think the police did a good job
i do n't know
i think so
it is possible
and i know this is n't something you want to hear
your daughter may have tried to hide a note where she thought you would eventually find it but where she knew your husband would never find it
she might have wanted to tell you something
no
you do n't have any reason to think that
if the police focused their search in her room her belongings well that 'd be only natural but they may have been looking in the wrong place
i think about it everyday
but every time the phone rings
every single time i still think it 's her
it 's been six years
what am i supposed to do
forget her
time heals all wounds right
she 's all i think about and i 've learned to live with that
but you want the truth
the real truth
if i had a choice
if i had to choose between her being out there living a good life and being happy and me not knowing never finding out what happened to her
or her being dead and me knowing
i 'd choose to know
hello
mrs. mathews
it 's thomas
do you remember i was there a few weeks ago
asking about your daughter
i remember
you just left
i have to tell you something
it wo n't be easy for you to hear
it 's about your daughter
mary anne
when i
when i was there with you her diary in your attic in silverware
if you read it you 'll know what i 'm telling you is true
what are you talking about
she went to california to los angeles
she wanted to start over
she wanted to be an actress
what
mrs. mathews your daughter is dead
she 's dead
who is this
someone
some men they took your daughter and they drugged her and they took her to a motel room
they did terrible things to her
who are you
they brought her into the room
one man he put a knife to her throat and he raped her
no
he raped her and
and
and he murdered her
he cut her up with knifes
no
no
no
they killed her and they took her out in the forest somewhere and they buried her
why
why are you doing this to me
they murdered her mrs. mathews i 'm sorry
it happened a month after she ran away
she 's been dead all this time
yes
i remember mary
you
you do
you 're sure
please sister will you take another look make sure
yes
i remember her
do you know what happened to her
i 'm trying to find out
she was a runaway
i 'm looking into it for her parents
what is this
those are her belongings
her belongings
that 's her suitcase
i had forgotten it till you showed me her picture
whatever possessed you to keep this all this time
she was the kindest sweetest girl you 'd ever want to meet
oh i adored her
i supposed i always hoped she 'd be back
after a time all i could do was pray she had moved on to better things
can you get this suitcase to her parents if you think it 's appropriate
i 'll do what i can
okay i 'll take it all
excellent
we accept mastercard and american express
cash
alright
may i have your phone number area code first
no you may not
okay
fine
i 'm required by state law to inform you that while it 's perfectly legal for you to purchase these items it is illegal for you to use them for any sort of
yeah i know the spiel
if you could bag it i 'll be on my way thank you
certainly sir
do n't you think it kind of defeats the purpose
what
the mirror
you ca n't see yourself in it
i do n't want to
yeah
she 'd be half as strict as you
but she would n't let dad treat me like that
look you got ta stand up for yourself
learn to fight back
rick
i ca n't
never say ca n't
just do what i do
alice you think you can leave
what 's wrong
kincaid and joey died last night
what
you alright
kristen
i ca n't go back to sleep again
i have n't slept much either
since kristen
we 'll figure it out
figure it out
i 'll be insane before i figure it out
the only thing i 'm sure of is that i ca n't go to sleep
not while he 's using me
then we 'll stay up together
here you are
where were you this morning
rick 's looking all over for you
have you seen joey and kincaid
god i ca n't find them
i ca n't find them anywhere
i 'm sure they 're around
yeah i 'm not so sure
i love to dream i just hate ones about my dad
you could do worse
my mom taught me when i was little
did you ever hear of the dream master
sounds like a game show host to me
no really it 's a fable
the guardian of good dreams
it was like my teddy bear when i was growing up
great you would n't happen to know his phone number
i daydream
you have to dream about some place fun
remember you 're in control
how 'd you learn so much about dreams
when they 're all you have you kinda become an expert
you what
when i used to have nightmares
i brought my friends in to help me
until they all started dying
kristen what happened
you 'll hear all kinds of stories
they 'll tell you it was murder but it was n't
you 've been up all night
that obvious huh
then you saw him too
saw who
i was up all night cramming for this physics test and i was putting this little baby together
look
no
you 're his sister right
rick stayed later after school with kristen
she was n't feeling very well
tell him i was looking for him okay
i 'm dan
i know
uh
alice
i thought it was an accident
smoking in bed
it was no suicide
it was not an accident
it was freddy and he 's coming back for seconds thirds and fourths
i was there in the dream
he took her
it was awful
it was awful
in her dream
no do n't
i gave sheila to him and now she 's dead
kristen 's story really got to her
i 've been working double shifts
extra money huh
look you know why you just do n't believe me
no offense or anything but it 's kind of hard to swallow
the story is the deaths you ca n't argue with
how long have you been awake
three days
you do n't really get it
he 's not a nightstalker
it 'll take more than bench presses to beat him
why ca n't we just talk to the authorities
yeah right
let 's trade death by freddy for life in a rubber room
adults wo n't see it
they ca n't
then what else can we do
try what other kids did
keep each other awake
we 'll meet at debbie 's tonight
at least if we do n't sleep he ca n't get us
who
he 's going after debbie i got ta stop him
hey you 're not alone
we have to stop him i 'm with you
you just feel sorry for me
cut that shit out
maybe before but not now
i want to help you
i 'm on your side
as long as your driving does n't kill us
it 's okay we 're just about there
he 's going after debbie
i got ta stop him
you know i get the weirdest feeling we 've been through this before
here we are
something 's wrong here
it feels like
what the hell was that
debbie
she 's gone
i've
collected her like the others
you look great
save it for later
come on
rick please
alright i think i see salvation
t t thanks alice
earth to alice
hey rick
excuse me ladies
i 'll just be a moment
i do n't get it
let me talk to you
so what 's up
what 'd i miss
she told us the story of freddy
it 's a town legend
he was a child killer who was freed on a technicality
so
it pissed off a lot of parents
according to kristen they hunted him down roasted him alive
nice neighborhood
now it gets weird
she says he comes back in dreams
if he kills you there you 're dead for real
hey man we 're all sorry
she knew she was gon na die
been up with alice
how she doing
i ran into her last night
she 's blaming herself for sheila
i know how it feels
i 've been thinking about kristen
maybe i could 've stopped it if i 'd listened
about freddy
what else
you ever look over this town 's history
not a safe place to be a teenager
anyway if i 'm next watch your back
something the matter with the cuisine
well mom i 'll tell ya when two of your friends die the same day you let me know what it does to your appetite
you 're just tired
do n't think i have n't noticed your not sleeping
that has to stop honey
what 's wrong with me
your distraught
it 'll help
what is it
oh god
he killed them
now you know who and what freddy really is
i though freddy was just an old town story
it 's no story
it happened
freddy 's real and he 's back
i 'll tell you later
it 's no just a house
it 's his home
he 's waiting there for me
to dream
it 's okay babe
we 're with you
i told you you ca n't help
this is n't a normal nightmare
i 'm doomed
feeling better now
yeah
i guess so
what happened
you had a nasty bump
i got ta get out of here
you just stay put
you need rest
you do n't get it he 's after me
do n't worry honey
excuse us dear
it 's okay dan
frankly dear we wondered what you intend to do with our baby
what i what
well i 've thought about it
i plan to keep him
look i appreciate what you 're offering but no
he is my responsibility
and ours
it 's our grandchild
hey
wake up
huh
should n't you be in your room jacob
it 's lonely in there in my room
my name is
i 'm sorry your boyfriend got killed
how did you know that
i could tell you were sad
i just wanted to see if you were all right
hi you do n't look very well
are you feeling all right
been having bad dreams
is that who you 're waiting for
no
i do n't think this is a nice place for you to be
maybe we should go find your mom
she does n't want me around
oh
i'm sure that 's not true
i 'll bet she 's very worried about you
i would be
no you 're not
you do n't even care about being a mom
how come you do n't think about me
who said i
wait what
who says i do n't like you
my friend with the funny hand
what do you mean
it 's where he hides out
inside
that 's how he found me
but how
he says it 's easy
especially with sad people
with closed off people
hi beautiful
jesus
do n't do that
sorry babe
the tickets
they 're coach seats but the plane lands in paris
it 's gon na be a helluva summer hon
i know
okay babe
what 's the matter
nothing
it 's just
i did n't see my father at the ceremony
he 'll show up
c'mon what 's really wrong
about him
no
well not exactly
it 's that
i felt like i was n't in control
for the first time since
all that
i 'm scared
you stopped it did n't you
it was probably just a regular bad dream
yeah
i guess
you do n't dream him up he ca n't hurt you
or me
or us
remember
you 're right
there you go
love you
me too
i was afraid you were n't coming
i watched from behind the stands
did n't want to embarrass you ya know
the drunk showed up that kind of thing
that 's in the past
unless you 've stopped going to the meetings
no
a deal 's a deal
thanks for everything dad
you sure you do n't want a ride to work
it 's just across the park
i 'm so sorry honey
daddy he 's coming back
krueger 's coming back
make them understand
how was the meeting
sobering
very funny
alice
since when are you such a smart shopper
since my little girl became a mom
you disappointed in me
no i 'm not
i sort of hope it 's a boy
be nice to have a boy playing in the house again
alice
i 've got to go
no
i wo n't have you running around in the middle of the night
you 're coming home
but dad --
now
hey what 's wrong with you -- let 's see a smile
had kind of a long night
dan keeping you up again
put a lock on that window girl
no the dan part was nice
good to see you again mr. grey
i 've got to go find dan
yeah before they revoke his diploma
it was no accident
it was krueger
he used to get in through my dreams but not anymore
he 's found some other way
alice it 's no dream
i 'm sorry
dan 's dead
have you visited the little boy on my floor
jacob the one who looks kind of sad
there are n't any little boys on your floor
he must 've wandered up from the children 's ward
i just wondered what was wrong with him
it was just an accident
like with dan
no accident
i tried to warn all of you about krueger
i do n't understand what 's happening
krueger has to use my dreams but he got to dan and greta while i was awake
how 's he doing it
why do n't you two stick to reality
you had me scared on the phone
what 's wrong with the baby
i think krueger 's trying to do something to it
oh alice
no
honey i love you but you 're going to have to get a hold of yourself
mark knows i 'm not crazy
ask him to show you his hands
i really think you need to calm down now okay
i just ca n't figure out how he 's getting in when i 'm awake
i am your friend and i 'm worried sick about you
but you 're like a locked safe
you 've got ta start dealing with reality
krueger is reality
and so is your baby
you 've got more than just yourself to think of now
what do you think i 'm doing
look
whether you believe it or not krueger is back
he 's after the baby and if i do n't try to do something about it who will
all i know is that you are not doing yourself or the baby any good by acting like a crazy woman
why do n't you take off leave springwood and cool out somewhere for a while
goddamn it yvonne
you do n't just run away from this guy
he finds you in your dreams
look
we're all tired
none of us had any sleep since friday night
that 's the only reason you 're alive
what
jacob
we 've got to get to amanda before it 's too late
but how are we gon na --
we 've got to go to the asylum and find her body
mark said her soul 's trapped with it -- that 's why she ca n't come to me
it must be
you do good work alice
so did dan
he sure loves to stay awake
that 's okay
he 's got the rest of his life to catch up on his sleep
give up mark it 's hopeless
i think i 'm starting to wear her down
have some anyway
not to mention the heartbreak of psoriasis
greta come on
one burger with me
my dad 's got this thing about drinking in the house
well we got ta do something
i 've got to write some of this down
that 's why it 's my fault dan 's dead
i thought about that
she must 've fallen asleep at the table
then get out
mark
do you think i 'm an idiot
for being in love with her
nobody thinks that
maybe it was her mother who killed her with all that polly perfect shit
it was n't her mother
the only reason we 're still here is that none of us has slept since the grad party
tell me some more about this krueger guy
why do n't i go make some coffee
there 's a lot to tell
who 's jacob
my baby
what you named it already
whoa slow down
how 're you gon na hide from a guy like that leave the planet
i do n't know
where are you going
i 'm going to see what else i can find out about mr. fred krueger
no it 's our problem mark
if i do n't deal with this they really might try to take jacob
you said she committed suicide
that 's what the newspapers thought
she spent the rest of her life in the asylum
after krueger 's trial she flipped out and hung herself so they thought
meaning
they could n't prove it
no body
nuns bumping themselves off is bad for business
but i 've seen her grave
empty plot
memorial stone
vacant
they never did put her under
cool huh
poor woman
no shit
i do n't understand
she killed herself
her soul 's gon na be in torment
yeah when are you gon na come to your senses
next life
oh what 's that
my undying love
have some
meet me later
milkshakes
cherry pie
banana splits
and no mom
pimples heartburn cellulite
and no modeling career
that club sucks they card everybody
let 's just party at your place
you know my mother -- get real
what about alice 's
he 's right
sometimes i feel like i 'm living with melicertes
who
oh he was this ancient guy i read about who like killed his kids 'cause they did n't want to run the kingdom the way he thought they should
all right kids i tell you what we 're gon na do
i 've got swimming practice until six thirty today
yeah
that means they 're gon na give me the key to the pool so i can lock up when i 'm done
have another one sounds like you need it
naah i 'm done
got to be on shift in a couple hours
are n't you going in
nah
it 's getting too cold for me and my wonderful mother will kill me if i screw up my hair
she 's got some model agency guy coming to dinner tomorrow night
stop saying that it 's bullshit
i want to talk about the baby
look
dan 's parents were pushing him
pushing him hard
he was bitching about it at the party last night
he was under pressure
we all are
pushy parents can make you more than a bit crazy
bottom line alice
anybody supernatural or not that wants to hurt you he 'll have to go through us first
all of us
right
dan
and he 's taking alice with him -- pretty good dive yvonne
you 've been practicing
two hours a day six days a week
vomit
faint
why do n't you shut up and let her talk
two of us died in the last two days does that strike you as particularly normal
mark
i 'm not finished i loved greta
a lot
and if maybe just maybe someone or some thing killed her i 'd like to hear about it
i ca n't listen to this
i should have suspectcd when i heard that doctor
i thought it was your father
it was supposed to be
dad had a heart attack two days ago
how is he
it was moderate
he 'll be all right
but it was out of the question his coming along
and they thought u you</u could re- place the skipper
you could train someone else
not in two days
look do you think i u wanted</u to come
if it did n't mean so much to dad proving his depth explorer it 's the last thing i 'd want
what is it
your out
this came for you
my father
he 's not
dead
matter of fact he 's much better
he 's left the hospital
what did you mean i 'm out
your father can be in nome alaska tomorrow
we have two choices ask them to send him out in a copter and take you off or the shark can put back into nome
you trade school boys are all alike are n't you
anybody who does n't happen to think like a little gold braided puppet is ipso facto a coward
u you</u said it
but i wo n't argue
wearing a uniform does n't bestow an automatic monopoly on courage u commander</u
it just so happens i 'm u not</u a coward physical or mental and before i 'd risk my father 's life
we 're u all</u risking our lives
that may be
but dad stays where u he</u is and i 'm staying here
you 're really a mixed up oddball are n't you
perhaps
but the idea of willingly going to u school</u to spend my u life</u at a paleozoic pastime that should have disappeared with the thunder lizards i 'm referring to war u that</u strikes me as the u worst</u cowardice of all being spiritually yellow
you mean u nothing</u is worth fighting for
peace the dignity of man the destiny of the human spirit
show me a man who says you win u those</u by fighting wars and u i'll</u show you an idiot
you may not u win</u them
but without men like your father to degrade himself by fighting to preserve them or as much as we have of them they 'd have disappeared u long</u ago
unidentified flying objects
then
this is a flying saucer
that 's enough holloway
i 've told you before wearing boards on your shoulders and parading with a stiff spine does n't auto- matically endow you with back- bone
any more than being the son of captain neilsen does
maybe just maybe when their ship does n't return they 'll decide not to come here after all
but if they u do</u
i do n't know
i would n't worry
so long as we have boats like the tiger shark and people like you the skipper dave kent sir ian and my father
and his egghead son
we 'll give 'em a u rough</u u reception</u wo n't we
now dave old buddy you know you 're exaggerating what do you think of this husband of yours
on most boats a certain loyalty exists between the exec and his navigation and firing officer
but unfortunately in the case of lieutenant dave milburn of the tiger shark and myself
but julie 's a nice girl and i 've seen you work
she deserves a fighting chance
helen
i appeal to you
reef
so they caught up with you too
at the worst possible moment
tomorrow is janie 's birthday
poor little kid has looked forward for two months to having her daddy home
now
u that's</u the worst possible moment
what could be worse than disappoint- ing a little girl
disappointing a u big</u girl
you 've asked why i stay a bachelor
there goes the best reason i know
huh
i might have a son like u that!</u
i guess skipper neilsen re- tired before you enrolled at the academy did n't he
i guess
one of the finest men and officers alive
a real hero in the best sense of the word in world war two
he taught us engineering and design
fought like a demon to develop atom subs
so
so all of a sudden his only son drops out of school be- gins making noises like a pacifist
a real egghead do gooder and crackpot
ban the atom tests
junk the nuclear subs
spend the mili- tary budgetfor peace
a lot of people think like that
but u they're</u not skipper neilsen 's son
it broke his heart
then when some newspapers called carl the honest sincere son of a war mongering father captain neilsen resigned from the navy
oh he still keeps his hand in playing around with projects like the lungfish but it broke him all the same
have you ever talked to carl tried to see his side
his side
i 've seen it all right
a nice bright yellow
cyclops
sounds like it
distress call from a small freighter between ellesmere island and greenland
one mayday then
nothing
we 're stuck tight
skipper
look at the depth gauge
how about that
the bow drove half through her but she sealed herself right up
what 's more important there 's our problem
the bow ram the sawteeth are holding the shark in the break
if we can cut the ram the shark can pull herself loose
i think you 're right
go back and tell dr. neilsen
have him report to the skipper
yeah
listen
hear that
i do n't hear anything
maybe you 've been down here too long
why do n't you go back up and
strange you did n't hear it
omit 274f
hey you know somethin'
it 's getting lighter in here
you know it u is</u
and if i did n't u know</u better i 'd swear we were moving
let 's get back to work and maybe we u will</u be soon
you hear that
the sound again
where do you think the voice you heard was coming from
somewhere down there
wonder where powell and carney are
we 'll have to look for them later
well
i 'm with u you!</u
get ready
we shove off as soon as griff reports all the crew aboard
right skipper
is there any way out of it
seems to be all around
what about down
i
don't know
course and speed
speed
about twenty two knots
course
due north
a mass of jelly like stuff came out of the thing and caught our torpedo
what
what course skipper
right at our one eyed friend
you better take powell and carney with you --
the frogmen
with their underwater experience they 'll be invaluable
take sidearms and flare pistols --
sidearms
but the saucer 's dead
we hope
excuse me skipper---
yes griff
all internal repairs completed and frogmen report exterior damage minor
skipper could you take a look here
something wrong
the inertial navigation system
must have been knocked out in the crash
why do you say that
we 're dead in the water
but it indicates we 're moving
what
excuse me captain there may be one last desperate chance a one in a thousand shot
anything ---
it 's possible i could adapt one of the torpedo guidance systems to the icbm so it would home on the saucer when he rises from the pole
what about time
it does n't seem possible but could it be an electrical storm center
under u water</u
high intensity arcs will burn submerged
and millions of volts
discharged in random directions
... above murmansk and finland
suppose our theorizing is correct
then this u could</u be the next danger point
what if the tiger shark were to anticipate a bit
perhaps be lying there waiting
we took for granted his source of energy was nuclear
but suppose it is n't at all what if it 's u magnetic</u
u we</u harness energy on a small scale by cutting magnetic lines of force
maybe cyclops does it on a u super</u scale
the north pole is the positive end of the biggest magnet of all the earth itself
.... in such a way as to prevent his returning to it and as you put it
recharging his batteries
if we were lucky enough to catch him with his power depleted
the radiation level from the saucer it 's rising
what direction does the system indicate
as we near the pole
there 's got to be an explanation
there is
i believe our friend
cyclops
is returning to life
all ready
as ready as we u can</u be
i 'll report to the skipper
doctor neilsen
when did u that</u happen
huh
it 'll be all right
we 're old friends
what do you think
i think i should have joined the air force
determine extent of damage immediately
after torpedo room report
you 're sure it 's cyclops
take a look
what 's the running time
thirty four seconds
right u at</u him
that 's what i said
but what can we accomplish
we can u ram</u him
a hundred and eighty fathoms
we ca n't be sinking that fast
it 's the screws skipper
at our declination angle running in reverse they 're pulling the shark u and</u cyclops right to the bottom
and we 're at safe maximum depth already
stop engines
suppose there 's an atmosphere of some kind inside cyclops
what
if we could get inside the saucer use our torches maybe we could cut the shark loose
remove your weapons commander
and come here alone
come where
that 's a u face</u
point of view is everything
to us u your</u form of life is ugly as we appear to you
tell me something why can u i</u hear you when the others could n't
my mission is to study various solar systems and planets select the most suitable for colonization
for horrors like yourself
swell
your friend was to remain where he was
he did
i am afraid not
therefore
why not me
what am i the closing act
on the contrary
i want you unharmed perfect
why
i have selected you to return with me along with several other specimens for study
we will examine you and the others discover desirable features to incorporate in our earth colonizers
it is a living thing
when damaged you would say wounded it immediately heals itself
that 's why no water leaked inside when we rammed you
of course
but it is time to be- gin the return voyage --
to navigate wo n't you have to
see your way
obviously
u that</u might be a u little</u u rough</u
well i 'll be
i 'll be another
just musing about our one eyed adversary and the legend of homer
cyclopes were the sons of heaven who forged the thunder- bolts thrown by zeus
our cyclops throws quite a thunderbolt itself
you plotted the course of cyclops
then that 's u our</u course
wherever u he</u goes u we</u go
.. until we get him
or perhaps until he gets us
we 've asked ourselves that over and over a thousand times
but u answers</u are what we need not more questions
due north
at five knots
no six
toward the pole
cyclops will have to linger at the pole to recharge his power banks
all right go to it
you got yourself a computer alma
been putting my files into it
you take sugar and milk
no
black
are you alright wade
yeah sure
why
i got this damned tooth i got a few things bugging me like everybody else
but i 'm okay
well you look
sad
upset
i do n't mean to pry
i 'm sorry about your mother
it was a nice funeral
alma i think there 's some dirty business going on in this town
always has been
this is maybe worse than you and i are used to
what i 'm talking about i 'm talking about murder
among other things
who
evan twombley the union boss who got shot
somebody murdered him
who
you know jack hewitt the kid i work with
what are you boys up to
same old shit
the good news is we have n't got to your car yet
the bad news --
just tell me when you 'll have it fixed
-- the bad news is there 's a problem with gordon 's truck what somebody drove through the ice last night
figured you 'd know something about that wade
yeah
i know about that
lariviere says he ai n't gon na pay for the fixin of your car
a couple hundred for the clutch
i got some more bad news
wanna hear it
tell me
chub says you 're fired
he ca n't fire me
lariviere already did that this morning
he 's a selectman
the town
he said to tell you to turn your badge in and clean out your office
i 'm supposed to pull the cb and police light out of your car
they 're town property
i screwed up the divorce
i agreed with everything she said
i wanted her to like me
i just want to be a good father
it would help if you were married if there was someone at home while you work
i plan to
soon
how soon
this spring
good
it would help if there were some drug or alcohol abuse on the part of your ex wife
sexual problems upsetting to the child
it looks pretty hopeless do n't it
no not exactly
i 'll look at the divorce decree see if we can get it redrawn
interview your daughter
jill right
yes
fine
i 'll need a 500 retainer
you can mail it
jesus
how much
how much will the whole thing cost
hard to say
if we go for custody depositions psychiatric evaluations it could drag on
ten or twelve thousand dollars
she could win on appeal
if we just want to get the visitation rights redrawn assuming they 're unduly restrictive it would n't be more than twenty five hundred
oh
you might be better off legally as well as financially to just go for the --
yeah
i know
the custody suit thing was just my getting back at her
i 'm not as dumb as i look
whatever you say
i love my daughter
i 'll send you the five hundred
you heard the news
i hear twombley got shot
yeah
you see it
nope
heard it
we was n't far apart
i spotted this buck then i heard the gun go off and twombley was gone
i looked over the little cliff we was using for a stand and there the fucker was deader'n shit
called it right in
this is gon na be one fucking mess to clean up
twombley 's son in law and daughter are up the weekend
did n't you say you 'd seen him wade
might as well take the rest of the day off
you look sort of fucked up
you 've been paid for the day anyhow right
not exactly
i mean he never paid me
you 'll get your money
do n't talk to any newspapers about this
twombley 's a big deal down in massachusetts you know
tell them your lawyer says you should n't comment
lawyer
i do n't need no lawyer do i
no of course not
just say it that 's all
he 's on to us
shit
what are we gon na do
maybe i can buy him off
i got ta talk to mel
you ca n't buy wade off
we bought you
that was me
it 's not enough snow not for tracking the bastards
no advantage there kid
do n't worry mr. twombley i know where those suckers are
rain or shine snow or no snow
i know deer
we 'll kill us a buck today
guaranteed
before ten
guaranteed eh
yep
right about now the does are holing up in the brush piles
the bucks are right behind them and we 're right behind the bucks
this gun gets fired before ten o'clock
whether it kills a deer or not is more less up to you
i 'll put you inside 30 35 yards of a buck the first four hours of the season
that 's what you 're paying me for ai n't it
damn straight
i used to play ball
yeah
drafted by the red sox
you played for the sox
double a. new britain
oh
pitcher
best ballplayer to come out of new hampshire since carlton fisk
really
they said
hmm
the only difference between me and that clemens on tv is luck shit luck
what happened
ruined my arm
brought me along too fast
why 'd it have to be my fucking arm i used to think
then i realized it had to be somebody 's fucking arm
safety on
yeah
this way
sun 's gettin high
deers have ears too
fresh tracks
deer shit
big one
here 's your buck mr. twombley
i 'll circle around
you only got a little while if you want your hundred bucks
do n't mind if i do
lariviere 's having a hell of a time in there
master of fucking ceremonies
where 's that gun you were bragging on today
no brag
just fact
got you for -- 450 500 bucks
i thought i told you to move that truck
relax chief
we 're leaving
you wanna toke
you got ta be more careful about that shit
gordon or one of those guys sees you smoking that wacky tabacky around me they 'll expect me to bust you
and i 'll be outta a job
some job
here have a hit
do n't be such a hardass
i know you got problems but everybody 's got problems
not here
got a job first thing in the morning first day of season
saturday i 'll hunt for myself
twombley something
er --
evan
he 's a mucky muck union official from massachusetts
you 're lucky
do n't know about lucky
the guy 's a full blown asshole
pay 's good though
100 a day
i got to guarantee a kill of course
which i can do
there 's some monster bucks hiding out up there
how 'd you get the job
gordon he 's always got some angle working
he wants to keep twombley happy i 'm his boy
like you and gordon
right
the sonofabitch could n't get along without me
yeah he 'd go broke tomorrow if you quit him
right
where 'd twombley get shot
in the chest
no i mean whereabouts
a half mile in along the old lumber road
you bring him up yourself
that 's a steep climb
the ambulance guys lugged him up
you stayed away
yeah
where 'd you get the blood
what blood
on your sleeve
musta
how 'd i know
what 're you doing playing cop
i got ta make a report to fish and game
i was just wondering that 's all
what 'd he do to shoot himself i mean
who the fuck knows
musta slipped or something
i just heard the gun go off
i never seen a man shot before
not even in the service
must be something
well i did n't actually see him do it
like i said
sure you did
what
saw him do it
what the fuck you telling me wade
i never seen the guy get shot i told you that
you musta seen him get shot
i know you did
let 's get the fuck outta here
you 're not making any sense man
there 's your old twenty gauge and that there 's the new browning you was showing me last night
this must be twombley 's gun
brand new
very fancy tooling
probably fired one time
it 's a beautiful piece of work
but what the hell jack i guess you deserve it
right 's right
yeah
twombley sure as hell wo n't be shooting it again
he sure as hell wo n't
i 'm fucking out of here
lawford
out of this fucking job
this job sucks
working outside in the winter sucks
open the door will ya
why do n't you quit now you want out so bad
open the door
we 're late
i mean it -- you got enough money now
head out for california
surf 's up jack and you 're digging wells in the snow
what do you mean i got money
i 'm as broke as you
i 'm sorry for the screw up
but i could n't help it it 's too late to go trick or treating now
i could n't help it i had to stop at penny 's for the costume
and you were hungry remember
who 's fault is it then if it 's not yours
you 're the one in charge daddy
yeah
look
those kids are still trick or- treating
they 're still out
those are the hoyts
i do n't care
they 're out
ca n't you see
look out there
nobody 's got their porch lights on anymore
it 's too late
those hoyt kids are just out to get in trouble
see they put shaving cream all over that mailbox there
they chopped down herb crane 's new bushes
little bastards
jesus h. christ
why do they do that
do what
you know
break stuff
yeah
it 's stupid
i guess they 're stupid
did you do that when you were a kid
well yeah
sort of
nothing really mean
me and my pals me and my brothers
it was kind of funny then
stealing pumpkins soaping windows
stuff like that
was it funny
to us it was
but it 's not funny now
it 's not funny now
i 'm a cop and i got ta listen to all the complaints people make
i 'm not a kid anymore
you change
i bet you did lots of bad things
what are you talking about
i just think you used to be bad
no
i did n't used to be bad
no sir
where do you get this stuff
from your mother
no
she does n't talk about you anymore
go on jill
some of those kids you still know
i do n't want to
why
why not
you know these kids from when you went to school here
it has n't been that long
it 's not that
what then
it 's stupid
it 's fun
i want to go home
i do n't like it here
oh jesus come on will you
do n't mess this up anymore than it 's already been messed up
join the other kids
do that and before you know it you 'll be as happy as a goddamned clam
sit right there by yourself if you want
wait for her by yourself
that 's fine with me
just dandy
i 'm going downstairs
that 's fine with me too
when mommy comes tell her i 'm up here
dad
i 'm glad you 're here
can you stay for a while
are we going in this
yeah
my car 's in the shop
this'll be fine
it 's pretty old
it belongs to pop
pop
grandpa
my father
it 's his
oh
how about a big mac
mommy wo n't let me eat fast food
you know that
it 's bad for you
c'mon we can always sneak a big mac
and a cherry turnover
your favorite
what do you say
no
what do you want then
nothing
you ca n't have nothing jill
we need lunch
mr. pizza
same thing daddy
mommy says --
i know what mommy says
i 'm in charge today though
okay
so we 'll get what you want
what do you want
nothing i guess
i guess i can wait till we get home
maybe we 'll stop by wickham 's for a hamburger when we get to lawford
that suit you
you always like wickham 's
okay
fine
please do n't cry
please honey
what are you sorry for
i do n't know
for the food business
i guess
i just thought you know we 'd sneak a big mac on mommy like we used to
i want to go home
you ca n't
that 's illegal you know
i know
you 're a policeman
nope
not anymore
i 'm nothing anymore
oh
jill please it 's alright
nothing happened
i want to go home
okay let 's go home then
told you the snow was coming down
take the grader
where 's the plow
jimmy took it
jack 's out hunting with evan twombley
his son in law damn near killed me
huh
at the school crossing
in his bmw
coulda hurt some kids
i 'm gon na bust his ass
do n't go playing policeman
what am i -- a security guard
you hired me you and your selectman friends
you do n't want the extra police pay
i 'm not saying that
get the grader
go out 29 past toby 's
do n't let lillian get to you
she did n't belong here
that 's why she left
fuck you
that 's what i love about a small town
you know everybody
what 's the hurry
a hunting accident
jack and twombley
huh
i figured you already heard
twombley jesus
we got to get moving i got to get up there
how would i know
c'mon you drive
we 'll take my truck
fuck
turn it off
all you heard was there was some kinda accident
twombley 's shot
i heard that
not jack
he 's okay i assume
fuck
you do n't know how bad or anything
you mean twombley
yes wade i mean twombley
put out that cigarette
fuck
fuck
fuck
he more than likely just shot himself in the foot or something
that 's what usually happens
i shoulda sent you instead of jack
i wish you had
i 'd rather be deer hunting instead of freezing my ass on that fucking grader
you ai n't the hunter jack is
and he ca n't drive the grader worth shit
like hell
that must 've been twombley
jesus
i bet that was twombley
you want me to follow them to littleton
let 's get to the top and talk to jack first
he 'll know what happened
he fucking better
if this coulda been avoided i 'll put that kid 's ass in a sling
what the fuck
my day 's already ruined
give me the keys
you can go back with jack
you still got a shitload of plowing to do
it ai n't done if that 's what you mean
something bugging you
yeah
a few things
well right now we 're not too interested
finish up what you got ta do then you can get bugged on your own time
how you holding up wade
i 'm fine fine
you rolfe
i remember you from high school
you 're a teacher now
harvard
sorry about the long lunch
my clutch is going out again
you ever think of getting a new car wade
on what you pay me
elaine
call chub meritt and have him pick up wade 's car fix the clutch
lillian
where 's jill
me and jill we just had a little spat
she felt kind of left out i guess from not knowing some of the new kids --
where is she now
is she in the truck with your friends
while you went off for a few beers with your friends
is that hettie rodgers there with whatzizname
yeah
she 's grown up some has n't she
oh jesus lay off will you
it looks like you 've won this fucking round already so lay off a little for christ 's sake
i do n't want her to go lillian
do n't cause a scene
no one 's trying to win any rounds
do n't make it any worse
i 'm not making it any worse
you are
me and jill could 've worked this thing out
it 's normal it 's even normal for me to get a little touchy about it
believe it or not
how do you think this makes me look treating her like some tragic victim or something
you ever come to your father 's grave anymore
no not anymore
it 's too
it 's too far
we should talk
we 've done all our talking wade
it 's just
let the past be
i 'm sorry about your mother
i liked her
you never know how much women like that suffer
it 's like they live their lives with the sound turned off -- and then they 're gone
wait there
she 'll be right out
is there snow on the ground up in lawford
yeah lots
see
get your boots
hi honey
no problem
look i
you make me sick
i ca n't believe you 've sunk so low
low as what
what have i done
it 's bad to want to see your own daughter
you know what i 'm talking about
for what you 're doing to me and to the child you say you love so much
love
you wo n't get away with it
are you okay wade
what was wrong
why were you holding everyone up
did you see that sonofabitch in the bmw
he could 've killed somebody
did you get his number
i know who it is
good
who
mel gordon
i still do n't understand --
from boston
evan twombley 's son in- law -- he was driving
i know where they 're headed
up the lake agaway
the old man 's out deer hunting with jack hewitt so they probably got some big weekend party planned
you okay
yeah
i 'm sorry about what i said
said what
about you and jill and needing a third person
she went back to lillian
forget it
i 'm sorry
i 'm going to start one of those custody suits
i do n't give a fucking shit
you know
you do n't mean that
yeah
i mean that
no you do n't
you 're pissed that 's all
you ought to cool off for a few days then have a long talk with lillian
you know
work it out with her tell her how you feel
lillian 's not out to get you
the hell she is n't
lillian 's been trying to nail me to a cross since the day i met her
i 'm gon na hire me a fucking lawyer from concord and get this thing this divorce thing rearranged
i 've been thinking about it a lot
it 's like she owns jill or something
nobody owns nobody especially not kids
and i pay her
call me
tonight
let 's get together
okay
jack 's sort of sensitive i guess
more than most
but he 'll be okay in a few weeks
there 's something funny about that shooting
there 's lots funny about it actually
i heard he was drunk at toby 's last night and got in a fight with hettie
he drove off without her
i 'm sure i 'm positive it did n't happen the way jack says it did
... jack 's turned into one of those men who are permanently angry
he used to be a sweet kid but it 's like when he found out he could n't play ball anymore he changed
now he 's like everyone else
i 've been wondering if maybe jack shot twombley instead of twombley shooting himself
i 've been wondering maybe jack shot him on purpose
wade
how can you even think such a thing
why would jack hewitt do that shoot twombley on purpose
money
jack does n't need money
everybody needs money
except guys like twombley and that sonofabitch son in law of his
people like that
jack would n't kill for it
besides who would pay him
lots of people
guy like evan twombley boston union official probably got lots of people want to see him dead
the government 's been investigating his links with the mafia
the mafia hire jack hewitt
no i just know jack 's lying about what happened
he just seemed -- i know that kid what he 's like inside
he 's a lot like i was at his age
you would n't have done anything like that shot someone for money
no
not for money
but if somebody'd given me half a damned excuse -- i was pretty fucked up you know
but not now
i can see what you looked like as a kid
you knew me as a kid
yeah but never what you looked like
not really
never really studied your face like now
i was never able to see you as a kid when you were a kid until now this way
what way
after making love
i like it
it 's nice to see that in a grown up person
it 's nice
do n't you think do you still think it 's a good idea to press this custody thing -- just now
i 'm her father -- supposed to be but i 'm not able to
yes
yes i am
it may be the only thing in my life i 've been so clear about wanting
even if it takes a big fight
then
i guess you have to
there 's another thing i 've been thinking about
i do n't know how you feel about the idea margie because we 've never talked about it
but i 've been thinking lately i 've been thinking we should get married sometime
you and me
oh wade
i 've been thinking about it that 's all
you 've been married twice --
it was to the same woman
i was just a kid
it 's not like a marriage proposal or anything just a thought
something for you and me to talk about and think about
you know
alright
i 'll think about it
good
did you tell them
that we were coming
do n't you think it 's proper for a fella to introduce his girl to his parents
i know your parents
i just want to pick up my divorce papers
for the lawyer
it wo n't take long
this is nuts
wade
what happened
jesus christ pop let 's go home
i got waylaid
sorry
what on earth is happening to you
why are you acting this way
it 's my tooth
my fucking tooth
i ca n't even think anymore because of it
i heard you talking
you got fired this morning did n't you
look that 's temporary believe me
there 's so much shit gon na hit the fan the next few days my getting fired by lariviere and merritt wo n't matter a bit
going somewhere margie
i 'm just cleaning out some of this stuff that 's built up
for the rummage sale
and some things for the cleaners
and the laundromat
do n't lie to me
you 're leaving me i can see that
do n't be silly
hi jill
have you been heating the house
not just with the stove
there 's a furnace
you 're not using it today
it 's broke i guess
there 's an electric in the bedroom
maybe wade should take a look at it
your pipes'll freeze
wade would you do that
coffee 's perked
when did she die
is
she 's dead then
it makes me sad
can --
makes me sad it was her
instead of me
i shoulda froze
whitehouse
next time phone ahead
how 's that
take care wade
you be careful of that little bastard
he 's dying to get in your pants you know
it do n't look right
what
the sign
it looks like it 's spelled wrong or something
fuck
wade whitehouse
it 's people like you that keep this fucking town from prospering
whatever somebody does to improve things around here you got ta find fault with it
i 'm not finding fault
it 's a good idea good for you good for the town
real modern too
this town sucks
aw c'mon i was only saying there 's something wrong with home made cooking that 's all
the sign 's fine
what it says is wrong
marg
that goddamned woman
thinks she can cart jill off and leave me alone like this
i 'm more than pissed margie
i 'm a whole lot more than pissed
i been that plenty and i know the difference
this is different
marg
you got orders
you talked to jack
not since last night
he took a guy hunting
the fucker shot himself
ker bang
that 's what it sounds like
not on purpose
i assume accidental
jack
the other guy
where
how 'd you hear that
cb
little while ago
one of the boys on the way in picked up jack on the cb calling for state troopers
i figured you 'd know what really happened
the fucking guy kill himself
this twombley who the fuck is he anyhow
no i
i 've been out on the grader all morning
twombley 's summer people
massachusetts
friend of gordon 's
it was his idea for jack to take him hunting
i got ta go
jillie you want a cheese grilled sandwich
it 's called a grilled cheese sandwich you dub
wade i got a message for you
jack hewitt he 's looking for you
wants you to clear your stuff out of his office in town hall
his office
you mean my old office
well i guess -- that 's what he said
he got his deer yet
no he 's out now
somewhere on the mountain
i 'd stay away from him if i were you
he 's real pissed
rolfe
a lesson in work and its rewards
you 'll thank me for this one day
sally turn off that tv
just do it
atta go
where 's ma
she 's coming
yeah
i checked on her
she had the electric heater
cold do n't bother her as much as me
which is why i give her the heater
is there something wrong with the phone
in the living room
why did n't you call and have the furnace fixed
wade
i thought she was alright
till this morning she was
listen it 's no big deal pop
come on smart guy
tell how it 's no big deal
tell me how a single one of you is worth a single hair on that woman 's head
pop for christ 's sake
you think you can take me now
come on try
you
by christ you -- i know you
yeah you goddamn sonofabitch i know you
you 're a goddamn fucking piece of my heart
you do n't know me
you do n't know me
so fuck you
fuck you
nah nah naw
you done done finally done it
like a man done it
done it right
i love you you mean sonofabitch
love
what the fuck do you know about love
love
i 'm made of love
call it what you want
everything you know is from me
yeah
bang
you and me
where the christ you going
you sonofabitch you leave my fucking truck where it is
i need
give me the goddamn keys
i need to get me to town
crawl
nothing in the fucking house to drink
not a fucking thing
my house my money my truck -- stolen
i do n't know you
my goddamn father and i do n't know you
rolfe
wade
yeah brother look i was calling cause -- has there been anything on tv in boston about a hunting accident with a guy named twombley evan twombley
there was something
it happened up your way
yeah i know him -- the kid that was with him
maybe you do too
jack hewitt
he works for lariviere with me
he 's my best friend
wade it 's late
i know you 're probably at toby 's but i 'm in bed reading
we got different habits
no not tonight
i 'm in bed too
i 'm calling because i need you to listen
you 're supposed to be a smart guy
you 're a professor
i got this theory
jack says he did n't see twombley shot but he did
do n't think about it
you 're exhausted
yeah i guess
get some sleep
i get to feeling like a whipped dog some days rolfe and some night i 'm going to bite back
i swear it
have n't you already done a bit of that
no no i have n't
not really
i 've growled a little but i have n't bit
pointless to stand around in church with nothing to do i guess
what about jill
is lillian bringing her
anyone else want one
rolfe
no thanks
i do n't drink
yeah
i forgot
what about margie
what about her
well do you still plan to get married
yeah
she 'll probably quit her job and stay out here with pop
we ca n't leave him alone here he 'll set the damn place on fire
with jill here a lot it 'll be good to have margie around
things are going to change in that department by the way
i got a custody lawyer in concord
i 'm gon na see him tomorrow
all hell 's gon na break loose but it 's worth it
i want to let the gas run out
i do n't want the bastard driving drunk and he 's always drunk now
after we 'll hide the keys
anything new about the shooting
twombley
i guess it was an accident like everybody thinks
want to know what i think happened
find them everywhere
i think your first response to the twombley shooting was the correct one
which is
that it was n't an accident
then who shot him
well your friend i think
jack hewitt
motive
you got ta have a motive
money
who 'd pay him that kind of money
not the mob
they got their own guys
specialists
they would n't deal with a guy like jack
who else benefits if twombley is suddenly dead
i do n't know
you tell me
okay
it 's likely there are people in the union who do n't want twombley to testify
they probably include his son in law who 's vice president and will probably be the next president
i read that in the papers
what 's his name mel gordon
yeah the guy with the bmw i told you about
i did did n't i
here 's my theory
twombley unaware of illegal union loans or whatever starts nosing around cause of the investigation and finds out
finds out his son in law is involved
so mel gordon would n't want a professional hit
that 'd make the feds dig deeper
he wants an accident
a hunting accident is perfect
shit around here you shoot somebody in the woods you say it was an accident you get fined fifty bucks and your hunting license lifted
jack 's probably saying the guy shot himself cause he ai n't got his deer yet and do n't want his license pulled
it 's too neat
things ai n't that neat
it makes me mad
that somebody can pay to kill somebody his own father in law and not be punished for it
do n't that piss you off
not particularly
right 's right goddamnit
do n't you care what 's right
i care about what happened
the truth
i 'm a student of history remember
i was thinking about that story you told me about pop and chopping the firewood out of the ice and after
yeah
i hate to disappoint you but i do n't think it happened
of course it happened
why would i lie about it
it may have happened but not the way you said
you think i would n't remember a thing like that
it was n't me
i was n't there but i heard about it
when i heard about it it was about elbourne
we 'd have to go digging in vietnam to ask him
and elbourne and mom took you to the doctor and told him you fell from the hay loft
well i never heard that one
i remember clearly cause when i heard i became real careful around pop
i was a careful child and i became a careful adult but at least i was n't afflicted by that man 's violence
that 's what you think
to help jack of course -- and to nail those sonsofbitches the two gordons
that 's what alma calls them
jesus rolfe whose side are you on
take care of the little things first the things that are distracting you from taking care of the big things
call chub merritt get your car back call a dentist for god 's sake and get your tooth pulled do n't trust the locals get your facts straight and go straight to the state police
let them work on this
it 's not like he has n't made us wait a few times
well you are n't the president dear
yeah no duh
you do n't want to say hi to your father
i 'm sure he 's busy
do n't you even want to ask
hey joey how bout a cocoa double whip cream
alice
mom just this once give it a rest
you 're jet lagged
we 'll talk about this back
back at the fishbowl
we 'll talk at home
you know most girls are n't as lucky as you
for most girls seeing the bolshoi ballet would be the experience of a lifetime
i know mom
it was great
really
he 's in a meeting
he ca n't be disturbed
i 'm sorry honey
no it 's okay
after all he is the president right
when i write my memoirs i think i 'll devote an entire chapter to the cocoa aboard air force one
your father never means to be so
i know
but lotsa times i feel like it 's me versus the world
some kid at school teases me and the same day a plague breaks out in bangladesh
i mean it does n't take a genius to figure which is more important
some kids were teasing you
that 's not really the point
you 're right and i 'll tell you a secret
i know exactly how you feel
big secret
you said the same thing to newsweek
i do n't drink coffee
you must be tired
it 'll wake you up
no thank you
the gunfire did that
you 're one of stravanavitch 's men
so you study world events little one
that 's good for a girl your age
yeah i study world events
five thousand turkienistan muslims were slaughtered in stravanvitch 's cleansings
along with 15 american school kids
you know hqw i studied that
i went to their funerals with my dad
i met their parents
smart for your age eh
top of your class
tell me do you know what the word quot;propaganda&quot means
yeah
do you know what the word quot;asshole&quot means
the woman you shot
she was my friend
that 's the way of the world little one
did n't they teach you that in school
fuck off you stupid asshole
it would be a pity to squander such a strong personality
he did n't leave us
you are a resilient man mr.
oooooh i 'm good
hey you guys back already
how was
the ballet
it was the experience of a lifetime
how bout a hug for the old man
alice
daddy
oh ny god
oh my god
oh my god
it 's okay honey
i got you
i got you
you 're okay
there they are
okay i 'm slowing us down
the americans say they are escorting a damaged plane
our pilots confirm they are surrounding a 747
did we warn them off
yes
they refused to alter course and the 747 would not answer our hails
it 's some kind of trick
a preliminary airstrike in response to our troop movement
they are in our airspace
we would be within our rights
the world would not look on us kindly if we shot down a civilian airliner
the pilot says it is does not have the markings of a commercial jet
warn then again
if they do n't respond
shoot them down
we will not be intimidated
do you see the maintenance panel
got it
pop it open
there should be a red switch toggle it up
okay it 's on
we 've got some indicator lights here
okay you 're aerated
to dump the fuel you have to close the circuit for the pump
there 's no switch in avionics so you 'll have to cross the wires
there should be five wires just to your left
do you see them
it 's cut
cross it
the static overwhelms the voice then cuts out
u.s. pilots this is air force one
copy air force one
welcome to the party
two and three are heading toward the boeing
okay
we 're gon na arc a fat one to the right
got it
got it
stay cool
how we doing colonel
we still got three migs running around and six more on the way
uh we got a problem here
just stay on my wing sir
i 'll take you all the way in
no
we 're losing fuel and my rudder 's not responding
lemme take a look
aw man
you 're torn up pretty bad out here sir
do you have any elevater control
sluggish
i think it 's jammed too
uh tower we got a problem up here
he 's dead then
they must have killed him
we do n't know that
holding the president hostage is not something that slips your mind when you 're making demands
walter if you have a point make it
that kid 's name was jim marshall
they are n't answering their hails
this does n't make sense
they 've got no chutes
they ca n't control the plane their engines are failing and they 're losing fuel
i prefered the terrorists
that 's game set and match
there 's nothing to do except call the chief justice
the iraqi ambassador is claiming it 's just an exercise
an exercise in futility
send the nimitz back in
general greely says it looks like the middle east
does your office have anything to add mr. dean
can we do that
we 've got four hours before they make it into turkienistan airspace
but they start executing hostages in
i hate to be pragmatic but they 'll sacrifice pawns before kings
it may take them some time to kill their way up to senior staff
okay
also i want you to put our bases in turkey on alert and have the kitty hawk prepare a retaliatory air strike
they still have the president it 's past their deadline and they have n't called
what do you think it means
like any good poker player they 're checking over their hand seeing which cards to play and which to discard
if challenged our fighters are to state that they are on a rescue mission
iraqi 's wo n't buy it
either they 're already in on this or they 'll think we 're spying
if fired upon tell our fighters that they are ordered to engage
the chief justice
what on earth for
to swear you in as president
special agent gibbs
you helped do this
yes mr. president
why
because it is my duty
you 're duty to what
the country you served does n't exist anymore
my loyalty was never to my country
that 's affirmative
ga get it
we 've already been inspected
sir this plane carries the president of the united states
the rest of the secret service
dead
how many others killed
nine
any of us
who did this
we checked the manifest
everyone was accounted for
a secret service agent
it must be
remarkable aircraft
remarkable
why did they do that
psychology
they 're trying to unnerve us
well it worked
how
avionics compartment
it 's the only place
you better get zedeck down there fast unless of course you 'd rather be a martyr than a savior
go
take serge
and watch your backs
we 've stopped dumping
but we 've only got about twenty minutes of fuel left
we 're not going to make it
not even close
hell we ca n't even make syria or iraq
where are we now
over the black sea
i can probably get us to turkey or georgia
no
if we land this plane anywhere else we will end up another entebe
the americans built a super plane that flies through mushroom cloud evades missiles and
refuels in mid air
call the white house
tower air force one has been boarded
romeo tango zulu copy one the television graphics of the first family against the presidential seal
ms. mitchell
so nice to finally meet you in person
the president and i were delighted that we could accommodate you
now if you 're all cleared
you can follow me then
up on the upper deck is the cockpit and the mission communication center
the mcc as we call it can place clear and secure phone calls to anywhere on earth
we 're linked to a network of military and civilian satellites and ground stations
we could run the country or run a war from there if we had to
this is a remarkable aircraft
you do n't know the half of it
did you know this entire plane is shielded from radiation
we could fly through a mushroom cloud completely unharmed if necessary
a dubious distinction no
i guess it depends on your perspective
and all these rooms here
conference rooms though some have other functions
the one up front doubles as an emergency medical center
here 's a press kit
i 'll let you guys get comfortable and once we 're airborne i 'll be able to schedule the interviews
thank you
please tell me your name
maria
maria mitchell
and what is it you do ms. mitchell
i 'm responsible for press relations for the flight office
how are your fellow hostages feeling ms. mitchell
scared
we 're scared
you 're pointing a gun at me
very good
thank you ms. mitchell
fear will keep you alive
any one who is not afraid is bound to do something foolish and bound to die
what do you want with us
cooperation
if you try to escape you will be met with automatic gunfire and a barricade of your comrade 's bodies will prevent you from exiting
good day
do you have to be so brutal
yes
why
do you enjoy it
i neither enjoy nor dislike
i do what is necessary
how can you
i mean they 're people
but they are not ny people
you look at me as if i am a monster but answer me this -- when your planes bombed the oil fields of iraq did you cry for those dark skinned men whose names you do not know and who 's faces you will never see
did you cry for their wives and children
they were people too yes
but they were not your people
that was war
so is this
come now you 're upsetting the little one
shall i begin by executing the president 's daughter
she 's right here
no
say something dear
nor will there be
my husband does not negotiate with terrorists
you will be the first to pay for that mistake
the world is such a dangerous place and we ca n't always protect our children
please
you can kill me but leave my daughter alone
four
jim
three
you got what you wanted
you going to release us now
you 're very valuable
and our nation needs so many things
now since we 've had very little luck getting washington or moscow to cooperate i wondered if you would be so kind
over my dead body
no
but since i only have a few of your staff left to kill perhaps i will start with your family instead
gibbs
stop
you 'll do it
yes i 'll do it
just leave my family alone
good
good
someday you 'll regret my nature
you do n't like seeing people get hurt
now in morality that is a virtue
in politics however that is weakness
you were a hostage to everyone else long before you were a hostage to
the taste of defeat is bitter no
one thing i 've learned as
there goes your ride
let my daughter go or i 'll take you out
if you put down the gun i promise not to drop her on the way down
no you wo n't
you 'll compromise
like always
hold on alice
our only policy assumes the plane is on the ground
our hands are completely tied while they 're in the air
okay gentlemen we 'll take no action until we confirm that the president is off the plane
lee go huddle with the d.o.d. i want an options paper on this in 20 minutes
twenty minutes
you heard me
you
congress and cabinet heads
madame vice president
we have an options paper
chandler takes the options paper waves off lee and reads it as she talks
yes
you 've made yourself quite clear
finally we can bargain
i 'm sure we can strike some sort of arrangement
land the plane and we 'll trade you hostages for fuel
mr. caidwell the ground 's a few miles away
how do you propose getting us from here to there
gravity
we 've already played our cards major
there 's no turning back
we ca n't jump from here or at this speed
but if we could get a message out tell the refueling plane
they 've cut communication and i spent a good bit of time looking for alternatives
my only solution ran out of batteries
get em ready
you
come with me
eighteen thousand feet sir
and two hundred knots
otherwise it 's suicide
got it
i 'll not going without my family
yes sir
sir we stay with the president
that is n't necessary
may i speak to you for a moment
ca n't it wait
no mr. president
it ca n't
do n't
i know spin control when i feel it
rose i do n't have time for this
for godsakes jim slow down and stop acting like the little dutch boy
not even you can plug all the world 's leaks
do n't you think it 's a sign you 're pushing too hard when your daughter sees more of you on mtv news than in person
she 's a big girl
she understands
how do you know she understands
you have n't spent more than five minutes with her or me in weeks
and when have i had five minutes
when i wake up in the morning and i 'm already three hours behind schedule
what do you want me to do rose tell the g7 to fuck off because i 'm a family man
how did your speech go
well they are n't burning me in effigy
that 's always a good sign
look on the bright side hon
shep here thinks i 'll be a one termer
shall i ask the chief of staff to schedule your daughter in
i do n't know why you stayed
please
do n't start with me
call petrov
i 'll be back
both of you
what are you doing
flying the plane
you have n't even driven a car since you took office
the fax machines
excuse me
the fax machines
no good
i said they disabled the communications system
no
i thought about this mr.
where are we sending it
white house situation room
someone should give you a raise
actually sir you could be that someone
please mr. president
you 're going to get yourself killed
is that your solution
freeing stravanavitch is gon na get tens of thousands killed
i ca n't live with that
i 'm not royalty
i 'm an elected official and the integrity of the office of the president is infinitely more important than the man who holds that office
we do n't negotitate
not as long as i 'm president
is that understood
what 's going on
we 're under attack
where 's my family
we 're handling it sir
one
but
two
three
go
white house switchboard
how may i direct your call
okay listen listen carefully
this is an emergency call from air force one
who 's there
is the vice- president there
who can i say is calling
this is the president
yeah right
do n't cut me off
this is an emergency
sir the president does not call this particular number
so whoever you are get a life before i have this call traced
you do n't understand
this is an emergency
let me talk to anyone
okay
if you 're the president when 's your wife 's birthday
look lady i do n't have time for games
just put the
thank you for calling the white house
no
no
no
wait
wait
cbs said they 'll give us four minutes
they thought the russian was a nice touch
i always wondered if my freshman russian class would come in handy
you wanna knock of f
no no
i 'm fine
what did the speaker say
he and the nra do n't like the wording
with all due respect sir maybe you should give them this one
your numbers are still pretty low and you called in a lot of chips to nail stravanavitch
i might still have a few chips left
we could always put you in a duck blind with a twelve gauge
the second amendment types'll love that
this is a crime bill shep
killing a couple ducks wo n't get it through committee
besides shep i told you
i do n't shoot babies and i do n't kiss guns
other way around sir
right
christ i 'm tired
do me a favor and keep me away from the press
you give me ulcers
that 's my job
defense and state department in the conference room in one hour
i want to review the iraq situation
yes sir
mr. president
they 're ready for you in the conference room
okay
hey pumpkin you 'll tell me all about it later right
mr. president how the hell did you get on board
i never left
where 's my wife and daughter
shepherd
sir
my god
i think that was a mig.
a mig
where the hell are we
iraq sir
we 're over iraq
iraq
shep you 're fired
shit
how long 's it been since you flew sir
twenty five years
we're hooked
we 're hooked
hove into position
commissioner we both know the mercury shuttle needs another month of pre launch testing
forget it
the boys on the board want that shuttle to go on schedule
and what do the boys on the board know about safety commissioner
let u me</u talk to them
bud get wise to the political realities
the boys on the board are under a lot of pressure from the boys downtown
you handle your front office people i 'll handle the press and leave the boys in washington to the boys downtown and the boys downtown to the boys on the board
commissioner
what
i just wish it was that simple
that 's right commissioner
senselessly murdered just minutes ago
that just does n't make any sense
i wonder how your boys in washington are going to take this one
i told you leave the boys in washington to the boys downtown and the boys down
you 've made your point commissioner
there 's only one other pilot who can handle that shuttle and that 's clarence oveur
he 's got a lunar flight today
i want him pulled
jacobs pull oveur
forget it
i was reading
i was reading too
what 's the story
some southern plantation owner falls in love with this poor
i was asking mccrosky commissioner
kruger sagittarius
commissioner aquarius
shut down accelerators
accelerators down
we seem to have a malfunction in disposal unit four sir
you better check it unger
sir i 've got an overload in disposal unit four
you better check on it mr. dunn
i 'll stay here and fly the ship
dunn
sir
you better take this
elaine
te
that 's not important now elaine
we have to talk
it 's got to be stopped
but ted the invitations have already gone out
i mean the mercury flight
it 's not safe and kurtz you know why
ted what 's wrong
ask simon
ted you 're overworked
you 've been flying yourself into the ground
there 's nothing wrong with me
let 's relax tonight just the two of us
i 'll make a quiet italian dinner just the way you like it with spaghetti
you 're as bad as the rest of them elaine
it 's all here in the design specifications
look
it 's all here
eat this spaghetti ted
it 'll make you feel a lot better
who 's that ted
sammy davis junior
terrible car accident
he has n't been the same since
elaine when are you going to realize simon kurtz put me in here to get me out of the way
and when are you going to realize ted that your mental hygiene is the most important thing right now
his name 's david stockman
he 's been here twenty years that 's all he says
ted you must remember what the doctor said the first step on the road to sanity is admitting that you 're sick
now take your electro shock and you 'll be back at the space center in no time
and by the way ted i 'm leaving you for simon
no goodbyes elaine
just go
if that 's the way you want it
that 's the way i want it
just turn the radio on and go
goodbye ted
i do n't want to hurt you
ted
what are you
i have to get in there
i have to stop this flight
ted we 're taking off
let me by elaine
what are you doing ted
i 've got it elaine
i 've figured out what 's wrong with the shuttle
ted
not now elaine
ted
elaine
ted
elaine what 's going on
ted there 's no time to explain
elaine i 'm going back there
just hold onto that stick and try to control this hunk of tin as best you can
ted please be careful
ted we 've only got ten minutes
not now elaine
i mean until we start to burn up
kurtz was the one who got us into this mess in the first place
you people knew this ship was n't ready to fly
you played god with over a hundred lives kruger and for what -- the prestige of your precious space program
that was very well put ted
well elaine this might be it if those guys on the ground do n't think of something
i just want you to know i love you ted and always will
that might be the news we 've been waiting for
simon just ejected
sit down elaine
if this bomb trick works we just might make it
simon was a fool to eject now
you mean
that 's right -- premature ejection
what will happen to him ted
the sun will heat that thing to over 450 degrees within seconds
he 'll roast like a pig on a spit
are you afraid
not when i 'm with you ted
i guess you 'd have to be a fool not to be afraid at a time like this
we 've blown the computer
elaine
set course change
set
now
compute
so you see our task is n't made any easier by ted 's refusal to admit that he 's sick
what can u i</u do doctor rumack
you can eat balanced meals exercise and take geritol
i mean for ted
you can be gentle with him elaine
he 's been working out a lot of his aggressions here in the garden
is that a good sign doctor
the brain is an amazingly complex organ elaine
is he making any progress doctor
yes -- last week that pile of mud was only this high
for the best little computer officer on the mercury mission
simon
who would believe that elaine thompson was once a stewardess on the denver chicago run
and i can hardly believe that i 'm engaged to someone like you simon
i 'm a very lucky woman
women u and</u the space program have come a long way sweetheart
but after the wedding no more complicated computers for my little girl
but darling they 've offered me a chance to head up the computer analysis division for the jupiter probe
you 're heading up the division in charge of babies for mr. and mrs. simon kurtz
frank 's the best pilot in the program
i 'm so excited simon
i guess this is a first for you
no i 've been excited before
elaine
ted 's a danger to himself he 's a threat to this mission and his behavior does absolutely nothing to promote peace in the middle east
simon why has he become so
so
so mentally ill
meet me onboard sweetheart
i have to pick up a few things at the drugstore
do n't be too long
simon what 's happening
he tried to disconnect rok
it gassed him
that computer is running this ship and we 're heading right for the sun
ca n't we change course
we 're computer locked and the manual navigation unit is down
my career is shot
your career
what about the lives of those people out there
simon what happened to the man i thought i loved
simon i did n't want it to end like this
we can be friends
you 'll die out there
maybe
simon what are you saying
elaine ask rok for a field interference scan
those sun spots might give us a problem with our communications
yes sir
i do n't think we have any alternative captain
i see
what do you think our alternatives are
we have to disconnect rok 's higher brain functions without disturbing his regulatory system
roger
you can do it from up here captain
i 'd rather sit down for this one elaine
no i mean you can do it from the cockpit
roger
you better get back there and monitor the regulatory unit
intermitant failure in scan mode r
analyze
negative
that does n't make sense
repeat analysis
negative
that 's not possible
cut the doubting thomas shit elaine
i know where i 'm coming from on this
elaine i 'm sorry about that little outburst a moment ago
that 's okay rok
can i say something of a personal nature to you
go ahead
you have great tits
i sure an glad they let scraps ride up here with us
i bet scraps is going to love mercury
do you think things will be a lot different on mercury dad
it 's going to be terrific
a whole new world new kids to play with
how many kids get a chance to live on another planet
no more kids yelling your old man 's a thieving rapist
look a man can make an honest mistake
anyway she was asking for it
they 're all asking for it all the time
come on up jimmy
say that 's some puppy
what 's his name
scraps
can i hold him
sure
he 's a boy dog
yeah
do you like it when scraps sleeps on his back jimmy
take this joey
it 's my last few bucks
you 'll need a hot meal when you get there
we 've spent everything on these operations
is it really worth it
we 've pawned your mother 's wedding ring
the kids have no winter clothes
joey what 's more important the kids clothes or your sexual potency
i do n't want to hear that word
okay joey
the doc says you got ta relax
this hospital in des moines is the best sex clinic in the country
all right
here
what
joe you do n't want to blow that thing and kill all these innocent people
i do n't want to live anymore
joe the insurance policy wo n't help your wife and kids
you bought auto insurance not life insurance
what
that 's right joe
now no one 's going to hurt you and no one has to know what 's wrong with you
you 're sure
i 'm sure
a couple eggs and juice would be nice mary
over
how would you like your eggs captain
over
no
poached
over
poached u and</u over captain oveur
over
just poached on toast
over
that 's how i want them
poached
over
all right captain oveur
over
poached
not over
over
captain the coffee machine is jammed and i do n't like it
have you tried it with a little cinnamon
captain oveur
mr. kurtz i presume
we do n't have much time
let 's move
i 'll explain everything
that 's how dry cleaning works
now i 'd like to quickly go over the digestive system of amphibians
do you think it 's necessary to explain u everything</u
good to be aboard gentlemen
captain oveur your navigator mr. unger and your first officer mr. dunn
whenever your're ready captain
yes sir commander
this is mercury one
everything seems a- okay up here and ready for count down
you folks need any help
thanks but we have a terrific woman in on thursdays
say is n't that dr. barrington the world- renowned agronomist
yes
it 's a privilege to meet you sir i 'm familiar with all your work
let 's go daddy
we have to check in
he was never appreciated at the institute
ah yes the institute i 'm familiar with it
now he 's d y i n ging and wants to be buried on mercury
i have to see bud kruger
do you have an appointment sir
no dammit
it 's a matter of life or death
you 'll have to be more specific than that sir
all right it 's a matter of death
death death
how about the first thursday in march ten o'clock
you ca n't go in there
do n't try to stop me
but that 's not a door
the door 's over there
are you on the mercury mission
that 's right striker
and we 're getting married when we return
excuse me are you alright
i noticed you talking to yourself
i 'm a nurse
can i be of some help
uh
oh thank you
it 's nothing
you do n't have to thank me i 'm a nurse
this is my father dr. barrington
not dr. barrington the world renowned agronomist
yes
he 's dying u a n d</u wants to be buried on mercury
i 'm familiar with your work doctor
you 'll have to excuse me i have to go
you do n't have to excuse yourself
i 'm a nurse
i understand
you 've been hurt
i 'm getting over it
if a relationship is n't working you ca n't force it
no i mean your head
sit down
i 'll take a look at it
i 'm a nurse
do you want to talk about it
i opened this panel and a vacuum cleaner hit me
no
i mean your relationship
we were in love but i 'm not sure i know what love is anymore
love 's the same as it always was
it 's people who change
people change in relation to each other
love changes on its own
not if the people change together in relation to that love
sure
but that 's only when the love itself goes unchanged
then the relationship remains the same and the love changes only when there 's change in the two people who share that love
i just wish it was that simple
we really were in love
you know how it is when you laugh all the time
no
it 's hard to l a u g h when your father 's dying
well we laughed
we laughed all the time
i happened to be passing and i thought you might like some corfee
that 's very nice of you
thank you
ah wo n't you sit down
thank you
cream
no thank you
i take it black
like my men
were you vacationing in los angeles
well it really was n't a vacation
you see i 'm a teacher in the new york city school system and i was attending a seminar on visual aids to education
are you from l.a.
no
i 'm from washington d.c. i 'm a lobbyist for the small businessmen 's assocation
after my wife died i felt like a fifth wheel
you know so many years being with one person -- a very wonderful person -- makes you always think of yourself as part of a pair
when ethel passed away i was lost
i could n't function socially and i could n't function in business
well after a thing like that you would n't be expected to
but i think it 's time we stopped talking about me
a woman like you -- why have n't you ever married
well i 'm afraid that 's a question that 's all too easy to answer
i know the answer -- career
a smart woman like you became so involved in your work you did n't have time for marriage
i wish i could fool myself into believing that that 's the reason
the truth of the matter is nobody ever asked me
you know here we are having coffee together and discussing education and business and economy
and we do n't even know each other 's names
full names i mean
mine 's eleanor
eleanor schiff
that 's a lovely name
mine 's milton
milt ettenhenim
but my friends call me bubbles
i 'm sure we 'll both make it
but just in case one of us
well is there a message you 'd like me to give someone
no
i 'm all alone
just in case i do n't have a chance to say goodbye i want you to know that i have n't spent so many pleasant hours for many years
that 's a very nice compliment and i 'd like to say that
you've done the same for me
yeah something like that but as i say they did n't have time to tell me very much
shep no
i 'll bet you have exciting things happen all the time down there
... but after
awhile
you begin to
get used to it
shep no
he gets so excited when new people are here
both pilots
can you fly this airplane and land it
surely you ca n't be serious
i u am</u serious and do n't call me shirley
what flying experience have you had
well i flew single engine fighters in the air force but this plane has four engines
it 's an entirely different kind of flying
<u all</u u together</u
elaine i have n't time to put this gently so i 'll be very direct
everyone of us on this plane is in a desperate situation
mister striker is the only hope we 've got
let 's see
those are the flaps that 's the thrust this must turn on the landing lights
... safe and sound and free to pursue a life of religious fulfillment
chicago the passengers are beginning to panic
when do we start down
will the hospital equipment be at the airport
yes everything they 've got
how are the passengers doing
i wo n't deceive you mister striker
we 're running out of time
surely there must be something you can do
i 'm doing everything i can
-- and stop calling me shirley
george zipp said that
and the last thing he said to me doc he said sometime when the crew is up against it and the breaks are beating the boys tell them to go out there with all they 've got and win just one for the zipper
i do n't know where i 'll be then doc he said but i wo n't smell too good
that 's for sure
excuse me doc i 've got a plane to land
captain how soon can we land
i ca n't tell
sir
excuse me sir
i 'm sorry to have to wake you
are you a doctor
that 's right
we have some passengers who are very sick
could you come and take a look at them
yes
yes of course
you 'd better tell the captain
we 've got to land as soon as we can
this woman has to be gotten to a hospital
a hospital
what is it
it 's a big building with patients
but that 's not important right now
tell the captain i must speak to him
certainly
what was it we had for dinner tonight
well we had a choice
steak or fish
yes yes i remember
i had lasagna
what did he have
he had fish
doctor rumack mister hammen ate fish
and randy says there are five more cases and they ate fish too
let 's see now
the co pilot had fish
what did the navigator eat
he had fish too
just how serious is it doctor
extremely serious
it starts with a slight fever
elaine you 're a member of this crew
can you face some unpleasant facts
no
all right
unless i can get all these people to a hospital quickly i ca n't even be sure of saving their lives
now is there anyone else on board who can land this plane
well
no
no one that i know of
i think you ought to know what our chances are
the life of everyone on board depends on just one thing finding someone back there who not only can fly this plane but who did n't have fish for dinner
you know i have n't been able to get near an airplane since the war
and even if i could they would n't hire me because of my war record
your u war</u u record</u
you 're the only one keeping that alive
for everyone else it 's ancient history
you expect me to believe that
it 's the truth
what 's hurt you the most is your record since the war
different cities different jobs and not one of them shows you can accept any real responsibility
but if you 'll just give me
it 's too late ted
when i get back to chicago i 'm going to start my life all over again
i 'm sorry
ted what are you doing here
elaine i 've got to talk to you
you
you should n't have come
i do n't have time now
what 's the matter
my orders came through
my squadron ships out tomorrow
i 'll be leading a very important mission
oh ted please be careful
i worry about you so much
i love you elaine
i love you
elaine just hear me out
i know things have n't been right for a long time
but it will be different
like it was in the beginning
remember
i remember everything
all i have are memories
mostly i remember
the nights when we were together
i remember how you used to hold me
and how i used to sit on your face and wriggle
and then afterwards how we 'd watch until the sun came up
when it did it was almost like
like each new day was created
only for us
that 's the way i 've always wanted it to be elaine
but it wo n't be
not as long as you insist on living in the past
you got a telegram from headquarters today
headquarters
what is it
it 's a big building where the generals meet
but that 's not important right now
they 've cleared you of any blame for what happened on that raid
is n't that good news
is it
because of my mistake six men did n't return from that raid
seven
lieutenant zipp died this morning
ted doctor sandler says you 'll be out in a week
is n't that wonderful
i think they 're getting the hang of it
when we re enlist i 'll teach them baseball
ted i do n't want to stay here
it 's time for us to go back home -- to the plans we made before the war
a lot of people made plans before the war
like george zipp
ted
what are you doing
you ca n't fly this plane
that 's what i 've been trying to tell these people
rain
and a little ice
and a little ice
sluggish
like a wet sponge
sluggish
like a wet sponge
it 's a damn good thing he does n't know how much i hate his guts
it 's a damn good thing you do n't know how much he hates your guts
rats
i 've lost number three
what happened ted
what went wrong
oil pressure
i forgot to check the oil pressure
when kramer hears about this the shit 's gon na hit the fan
but ted you 're the only
i do n't care
i just do n't have what it takes
they 'd be better off with someone who 'd never flown before
ted
yes
i wanted you to know -- now -- i 'm very proud
tell them the gear is down and we 're ready to land
the gear is down
we 'd better get back now
joey can stay up here for a while if he 'd like to
hey we 've been waiting for you
a little bit late tonight
who wants to be first
airsick
i think so but i 've never seen it so acute
find out if there 's a doctor on board as quietly as you can
oh bill i 'm going to miss you so much
you promise you 'll write
every day
good bye darling
oh bill i 'll keep it
i 'll keep it with me all the time
so long darling
good bye
take care of yourself
bill
bill
good bye bill
good bye darling
good bye darling
i love you
i love you darling
good bye darling
and get that finger out of your ear
you do n't know where that finger 's been
gunderson
yes captain
did you decide on a runway yet
runway niner
it 's the longest and directly into the wind
eight miles
turn right to heading zero eight niner
you are now eight miles from the airport
turn right to a heading of zero eight niner throttle back slightly and begin to lose altitude to fifteen hundred feet
he 's all over the place
nine hundred feet up to thirteen hundred feet
what an asshole
watch your altitude striker
it 's too erratic
you ca n't come straight in
you 've got enough fuel left for two hours flying
you 've got to stay up there til we get a break in the weather
what did you think of great expectations
well it was n't all that i had hoped
oh i ca n't stand it
what is it
how ya doing honey
oh jack i 'm so warm
i 'm burning up
here
wait a minute
i know you
you 're kareem abdul jabbar
you play basketball for the los angeles lakers
i 'm sorry son but you must have me confused with someone else
my name is roger murdock
i 'm the co pilot
you u are</u kareem
i 've seen you play
my dad 's got season tickets
i think you should go back to your seat now joey
right clarence
i 'm an airline pilot
ah clarence according to my calculations with this tailwind we ought to be able to make up an additional fifteen minutes over the rockies
i think you 're the greatest
but my dad says you do n't work hard enough on defense
denver control this is flight two zero- niner intersecting victor airway seven- niner niner
... and that lots of times you do n't even run down court
we are turning left to a heading of zero- niner niner
... and that you do n't really try except during the playoffs
the hell i do n't
i 'm out there busting my buns every night
hi
i 'm randy
i 'm lisa
oh you have a guitar
i thought maybe you 'd like to hear a song
oh i 'd love to
okay this is one of my favorites
would either of you like another cup of coffee
i will but jim wo n't
roger
huh
roger
huh
we have clearance clarence
roger roger
what 's our vector victor
do you want me to check the weather clarence
no why do n't you take care ot it
no he 's not bothering anyone
let him stay up here
all right
but just remember my name is roger murdock
excuse me sister
yes
there 's a little girl on board who 's ill and
oh yes i saw
poor child
could i borrow your guitar
i thought i might be able to cheer her up
of course
fourteen b. it 's halfway down on your right
thank you
do you feel all right sir
oh -- i have n't flown for a long time
well i flew in the war but that was a long time ago
i would n't know anything about it
would you go up please
mr. striker the passengers are ready
thank you randy
you better leave sweetheart
you might get hurt in here
oooh
hardball
that sounds interesting
are you going to strike me
you could tie me up and then do whatever you want with me
i 've got my own ropes
does that cost extra or you throw them in
you 've got me all wrong
i do n't charge money for something that i myself find pleasurable
look i do n't know where mr. strader might be
he comes and he goes
the girl out front mentioned strader 's assistant somebody named watson
maybe he knows
todd
todd does n't know either
i know
why do n't you hang around for a while let me entertain you
it 's matt right
now tell me the truth have you ever
made it
with one of us
not unless i got real drunk and nobody told me about it later
a virgin
i find that very arousing
there 's lots of things i have n't done but his ai n't high on the list
do n't take it personally
i think you 're just a little scared now about what you might find once the lights go out
a little scared
and a lot curious
maybe more than you want to admit
but does n't that turn you on that curiosity and fear swirling together
think of it as broadening your horizons
i like my horizons narrow
your voice is saying no but your body is saying yes
you okay
yeah
you are cassandra
that 's right
we are with the police department
this is sergeant sykes and i am--
ss'ai k'ss
perfect
so what 've you got on tuggle 's killers
jesus sykes -- it 's been less than ten hours
me and alterez are on it okay
you do n't have squat
you ever try to make a case in slagtown
the list of newcomer informants is about as long as the list of mexican war heroes
look at your dildo partner
he 's too scared to even come down to the sand
you 're not gon na get wet standing here moron
i 'd like to see you next to a sea of hydrochloric acid fedorchuk
see how much surfin you 'd do
well if it is n't detective jetson
forget you hip waders big guy
lay off asshole
i may be an asshole but at least i 'm a real detective not some outer shit space thing
william harcourt
yes
i 'm sergeant sykes and this is detective jetson los angeles police department
sergeant
detective
i was n't aware there were any newcomers at the rank of detective yet
yes i heard about poor warren
tragic
you were partners with him on some slag -- uh newcomer real estate thing
that 's right
he and i along with seven or eight others
listen gentlemen i will be happy to assist you in any way i can -- unfortunately at the moment i 'm overdue at another function
move a finger harcourt and you 're history
no sergeant -- not history
eternity
that cop the human he was the one who killed anderson and the driver
this is becoming a serious breach of security
he did n't recognize me
it is his new partner that i 'm worried about
when we picked him up he was talking to those two cops -- the two who came to question you about hubley
this is getting out of hand
i want you to deal with it
immediately
man somebody really hung one on you
i 've heard some good ones for you guys
humphrey bogart harley davidson
i guess the people at immigration got a little punchy after a while coming up with names for a quarter of a million of you
you were n't at the back of the line were you george
my true name is ss'tangya t'ssorentsa
gesundheit
you do n't mind if i stick to george do you
anyway what 's it matter to you if we think it 's funny right
whatta you care
that is exactly so
it is like your name
sykes
i 'm sure it does n't bother you at all that it sounds like ss'ai k'ss two words in my language which mean excrement and cranium
let 's talk hubley
his body was discovered three days ago in an alley off of central avenue near downtown
with two bri sabot slugs in the chest
through the chest
rupturing both the primary and secondary hearts
nice signal dickwad
terrific
a real pillar of the community
was hubley missing anything when they found him
was he ripped off
there was no wallet
but he was still wearing a watch and two rings
the guys at the mini mart last night made a half assed stab at the money in the till -- but i do n't think that 's what they were there for
i think we got us a couple'a executions on our hands george
the murder at the mini mart is not our case
the captain said--
look you want to fit in here right
you want to learn how to get along
yes
well there 's a thing about partners about being somebody 's partner
you do for each other
and other people 's rules do n't mean shit
it 's the rules set up between the two of you that 's all that counts
understand
okay
well my friend and partner was shot last night and i 'm after the shitbag that did it
as my partner i 'm asking you to respect me and help me find him
what is wrong
nothing 's wrong
i just want to get something straight
you agree that there 's a good chance these two shootings are somehow related right
well
yes quite possibly
possibly
good
well would you be willing to accept the theory george that
possibly
by examining the evidence from one case we might shed some small ray of light on the other
does that sound unreasonable to you
yes
no it is not unreasonable
although i--
great
well i 'm sure glad that 's settled are n't you
what 's this
what 's going on
nothing
nothing
should n't we examine their personal effects
newcomers working near methane gasses at oil refineries must paint it on their boots to protect against sparks
how the hell do you know that
a large number of my people were hired by refineries because the methane fumes are not harmful to us
my spouse 's brother is one
so the slag they 're cutting into upstairs worked at a refinery just like hubley worked at a refinery
i 'd say that possible connection between the two cases just got a hell of a lot more possible
okay next step -- i got ta go talk to the wife of the slag store owner blown away last night
i believe i should interview the widow alone
why the hell--
great fine
you talk to the wife
mrs. porter is not taking her husband 's death well
did you learn anything
a week ago two men came to see her husband
after they left he was very frightened
she identified one of the men from a photo i showed her
it was hubley
aw right
what about the other guy
she did n't know him
but she said her son might
did you talk to him
he has not been home since that day
but she told me where to find him
rudyard kipling
no shit
listen we just need a minute of your time
we 'd like to ask you about a business associate of your warren hubley
why did you do it
why 'd i do what
agree to work with me
you do n't like me
you do n't like any of us
you have nothing but contempt for us
and yet you become an outcast from your club of detectives by making me your partner
my partner is dead
because one of you bastards killed him -- then disappeared into a rathole down in slagtown where he 's home and dry 'cause nobody sees nothing nobody says nothing
who said that
at the end of the bar
your name would n't happen to be porter would it
uh matthew
back off george
but i--
i 'll handle it
screw you
screw me
that ca n't be right
tell me
your mother mates out of season
that 's very colorful
but see -- now i 've got a problem
i do n't seem to be getting much cooperation from you porter
so i guess we 're gon na have to take this little session down to my office ya know
if i may make a suggestion
we have different weak spots than you do
next time a blow to the nerve plexus under the arm here will produce the effect i think you were looking for
yeah sure
i knew that
i do n't think i could ever learn to read that shit
how long did it take you to learn english
three months
we learn quickly
we adapt
it is our strength
what we were bred for to adapt to hostile environments
which one is that
raw what
this is mole
it 's good
i 'll bet
would it really put you out if they tossed that on the grill for a minute or two
our bodies do not assimilate the nutrients if the food has been cooked
so what was that other word for human
slow ka
ss'loka
it means literally small but intelligent creature
it loses much in the translation
and what was that one about my mother
that was a good one
ss'trokya ss'lato na
yeah that 's it
say it slow
who is he
todd watson
the assistant manager
we were chasing you because you ran you dumb son of a bitch
when will strader return
i believe he is probably lying
through his ass
next time you see him tell him to call me
unless you want us to keep coming back on you like a bad case of herpes
so she keeps you on a pretty short leash does she
my wife
she worries about me
human children can be very beautiful
getting married
congratulations
you will be taking sunday off then
maybe not
i do n't know
i 'm not sure i 'm gon na go
she does n't need her burn out of a father there
... and so and so the doctor says if this is the thermometer then where 'd i leave the pen
you 're not
you do n't think that 's funny
george work with me i always get a laugh with that one
look if the doctor 's got the thermometer in his hand then where 's his pen got ta be
in the other man 's rectum
sticking out of his ass
yeah
see that 's what makes it a joke
there 's like a surprise and your mind fills in the funny picture
here 's this guy with a pen stuck in his ass and he thinks it 's a thermometer
nada huh
your health
ta ss'trakyona
there is so much our two peoples do n't understand about each other
no shit holmes
you 're only from another goddamn planet for chrissakes
you humans are very curious to us
you invite us to live among you in an atmosphere of equality we 've never known before
you lay before us a beautiful green world full of freedoms and opportunities
you give us ownership of our lives for the first time
and you ask no more of us than you do of yourselves to live by the rules
rules that are n't made to keep one people subordinate to another but rules that exist to preserve equality
you aspire to very high ideals here
i hope you can understand how special your world is
how unique a people you humans are
so it us all the more painful and confusing to us that so few of you seem capable of living up the the ideals you set for yourselves
do n't count on me george
i never had any ideals
i 'm going home
yeah go home
get some sleep
you do sleep do n't you
where 'd you get this
a man a human was wiring it to your car
i did n't get a good look at him
i must call my wife
she 's going to divorce me
george she 's not gon na divorce you
you mate for life remember
she 's very progressive
i 'm certain she 's considering it
it 's all right george
it 's cool
just wait here all right
i 'll be back in a coupla minutes
thank you
what was that about
nothing
... so we 've got three guys dead
all newcomers all killed the same way -- execution style
warren hubley was in middle management at a refinery
joshua strader operated a successful bar and nightclub
... and porter ran a piece of shit mom and pop mini mart
so what the hell 's the connection
what 's this nothing shit
it was n't nothing yesterday when you asked bentner to run that test and he looked like he was about to shit peach pits and it 's not nothing now
do n't lie to me george you 're bad at it
you must leave me alone on this
no secrets goddammit
you do n't hold back from me
whatever is going on you 're gon na tell me now
no
i can not involve you
this is not your concern
the hell it is n't when somebody wires up enough c-4 explosive to my car to turn me into pink mist
that slag was on something and not sour milk either
am i right
tell me
what is it
... it is called ss'jabroka
to us it is a potent narcotic
how potent
like your cocaine i suppose
the high lasts several hours
we would receive small amounts of it
as a reward for our labor
we
you 've taken it
we all did
where did he get it
was there any of it on the ship
no
i am sure not
that is why i am so concerned
someone must now be producing it here
but none of my people know how to make it
the process was carefully guarded
jesus this is major
why did n't you tell me sooner
why 'd you hold out on me
your people do n't know about this part of out past
and they ca n't know -- it would threaten our entire existence here
george
look me in the eye
george you do n't ever lie to me again
i must trust you matthew
i can not stop this without you
they had months in quarantine to develop the plan
porter with his chemistry background must have somehow come up with the formula for the drug
hubley manufactured it -- at the refinery
strader through the nightclub established a distribution network
and harcourt--
harcourt was the brain who brought it all together
okay george -- we got ta play this real smart
if the drug is here we must destroy it
no george -- you 're missing the point
the drug is evidence
we need to have the evidence ya know
george c'mon -- lighten up
it 's a beauty of a case
do n't sweat it -- we got him by the short hairs
he ai n't gon na make any more of the shit
the fifty kilos matthew
i have to find it
i ca n't let it get out on the street
why
what 's the big goddamn deal
fuck procedure
shit
ss ai
with harcourt and kipling dead i assume you will be requesting reassignment now
it 'd be for your own good
i think you 'd be better off with a partner who 's a little more
by the book
still i got ta tell you george for a quiet guy you 're sure hell on wheels once you get going
i 'd kinda hate to miss your next two days as a detective
what 's this about george
i know that look
there
go back
down that side street
no
we must do this alone
do what
george--
what is this
... it 's harcourt
harcourt is dead
no he 's not
not if he overdosed on the drug
massive amounts trigger a
a change
your body functions seize up you appear to be dead but it 's really a state of incubation
when you emerge you 're
tell me about it
i never thought i 'd say this but -- for once in my life i think i 'm willing to wait for back up
we ca n't let him get away
why the hell are you so dead set against back up
because
because of what will happen if humans see what we are capable of becoming
but there 's no more drug
you understand that
but how many others will
mr. hubley was an all right guy -- and a damn good manager
the men liked him
i 'm really gon na have to scramble to fill his shoes
well one of the men did n't like him so much
you think this is the guy who did it
we think he could'a been involved yeah
you know him
to be honest it 's hard to say
i hate to admit it but -- they all still kinda look alike to me
who else can i ask around here
wait
you know who it looks like
yeah
anderson
uh
james anderson
he is n't in today
he took the afternoon off
i think you 're gon na find he 's taken the rest of his life off
that where anderson worked
yes it is
thirty five percent pure methane gas in there
i do n't know how these fellas do it
do n't piss him off o'neal
when he gets like this i ca n't control him
i 've seen this before
he got like this once -- i saw him jerk a guy 's spine out and show it to him
nothing i could do
i hadda go throw up
... they took the stuff out all of it -- this afternoon
here 's hubley
left quarantine on november thirtieth relocated first to riverside then moved to los angeles early in february the following year
field of expertise chemical manufacturing
looks like he passed up several other better paying jobs waiting for that one at the refinery
try joshua strader will ya darlin
for you anything
released december one
he and his wife moved first to modesto then coalinga california -- wherever that is -- settled in l.a. in april
field of expertise organic chemical engineering
he and his wife have one child a son
yeah -- we met him
wonderful boy
close personal friend of george 's here
i 'm sorry matt
nothing here seems to be matching up
can you dig up their quarantine records in this thing
sure
just a minute
jesus are the questions too tough for you already
let 's try again-- is your name porter
ss'kya'ta
what 's that
yeah right
do n't push your luck
anyway according to the sheet the guy you nailed outside by the car--
the human
yeah
he was one martin helder
white male twenty seven
let 's see
wrap sheet shows one armed robbery conviction a couple for sale of a controlled substance
oh yeah and he was wired on coke when you stopped his clock
no i.d. on him and -- well you know no fingerprints -- so it could be tough
your buddies this morning went through the mug book but could n't make a facial match
fedorchuk could n't find his ass with his hands in his back pockets
you took this gut out too did n't you
yeah
lucky for you you got him in both of his
well what we loosely refer to as
hearts
lucky nothing
i had to empty my damn gun into him
that 's the way these people are
you do n't hit both pumps you just piss them off
oh here 's an extra headshot if you need one
we 're just about to start cutting in
you 're welcome to stick around if you want
it 's really fascinating stuff
yeah i 'll bet
you guys finished the postmortem on strader yet
you mean the blob
they 're finishing up now
what kind of test
looking for some foreign compound in the blood of that alien you dropped the other day
did he find anything
yeah sykes
captain
i 'd like to volunteer for duty with the new detective
you are to have nothing to do with the investigation into bill tuggle 's death
you know that
leave that for fedorchuk
departmental policy
you
how can i go
put on your wash and wear suit and your clip on tie have your landlady tie your shoes for you and show up at the church
simple
me and carol are going
what
hey look -- we 've known kristin since
since she was conceived in that cabin up in big bear
remember
you and edie banged the wall so hard me and carol were picking plaster out of our hair for a week
goddammit tug -- i want to see kristin get married okay
but--
but you 're bummed because your ex and her new husband are paying for the whole thing
shit if kristin had to get married where i could afford it we 'd be holding the reception at buddy 's burgers
does that look at all suspicious to you
whatever gave you that idea
you got your vest
of course
right in the trunk of the car
yeah that 's comforting
mine too
watch the driver
i 'm going for a better angle on the door
i got him
do n't get pinned
get outta there
i ca n't
do you mind
i 'll cover you
get outta there
this floor 's freezing
christ
i never saw such a buncha old women
you want me to fetch your slippers hudson
would you sir
whoooah
no shit
i 'm impressed
let 's go
let 's go
cycle through
hey top
what 's the op
rescue mission
there 's some juicy colonists daughters we got ta rescue from virginity
okay let 's do it
awright
i want a nice clean dispersal this time
set down sixty meters this side of the telemetry mast
immediate dust off on my clear then stay on station
ten seconds people
look sharp
first squad up on line
hicks get yours in a cordon
watch the rear
vasquez take point
let 's move
flame units only
i want rifles slung
let 's go
pull 'em out
uh,
apone i want you to lay down a suppressing fire with the incinerators and fall back by squads to the apc over
say again
all after incinerators
i 've isolated a neuro muscular toxin responsible for the paralysis
it seems to be metabolizing
he should wake up soon
now let me get this straight
the aliens paralyzed the colonists carried them over there cocooned them to be hosts for more of those
which would mean lots of those parasites right
one for each person
over a hundred at least
yes
that follows
but these things come from eggs
so where are all the eggs coming from
that is the question of the hour
we could assume a parallel to certain insect forms who have hivelike organization
an ant of termite colony for example is ruled by a single female a queen which is the source of new eggs
you 're saying one of those things lays all the eggs
well the queen is always physically larger then the others
a termite queen 's abdomen is so bloated with eggs that it ca n't move at all
it is fed and tended by drone workers defended by the warriors
she is the center of their lives quite literally the mother of their society
could it be intelligent
hard to say
it may have been blind instinct
attraction to the heat of whatever
but she did choose to incubate her eggs in the one spot where we could n't destroy her without destroying ourselves
that 's if she exists of course
that 's it
see it
emergency venting
how long until it blows
i 'm projecting total systems failure in a little under four hours
the blast radius will be about thirty kilometers
about equal to ten megatons
it 's going to be closer
you better get going
see you soon
how much time
plenty
twenty six minutes
we're not leaving
ripley
she 's alive
they brought her here and you know it
in seventeen minutes this place will be a cloud of vapor the size of nebraska
you did okay bishop
well thanks i --
fifty seven
oh christ
you 'd drifted right through the core systems
it 's blind luck that deep salvage team caught you when they
are you all right
have they located my daughter yet
well i was going to wait until after the inquest
is she
amanda ripley mcclaren
married name i guess
age sixty six
at time of death
two years ago
i 'm sorry
amy
cancer
hmmmm
they still have n't licked that one
cremated
interred parkside repository little chute wisconsin
no children
no
there 's no way
hear me out
i was reamed steamed and dry cleaned by you guys
and now you want me to go back out there
forget it
what about you
what 's your interest in this
well the corporation co financed that colony with the colonial administration against mineral rights
we 're getting into a lot of terraforming
'building better worlds
yeah yeah
i saw the commercial
i heard you were working in the cargo docks
that 's right
running loaders forklifts that sort of thing
it 's all i could get
anyway it keeps my mind off of
everything
days off are worse
what if i said i could get you reinstated as a flight officer
and that the company has agreed to pick up your contract
if i go
if you go
it 's a second chance kiddo
and it 'll be the best thing in the world for you to face this fear and beat it
you got ta get back on the horse
spare me burke
i 've had my psych evaluation this month
yes and i 've read it
you wake up every night sheets soaking the same nightmare over and over
no
the answer is no
now please go
i 'm sorry
just go would you
yello
oh ripley
hi
burke just tell me one thing
that you 're going out there to kill them
not study
not bring back
just burn them out
clean
forever
that 's the plan
my word on it
you never said anything about an android being here
why not
well it did n't occur to me
it 's been policy for years to have a synthetic on board
i hope you 're right
i really do
i suggest you study the disks ripley has been kind enough to prepare for you
that the atmosphere processor
uh hunh
one of thirty or so all over the planet
they 're completely automated
we manufacture them by the way
well i mean
i know this is an emotional moment but let 's not make snap judgments
let 's move cautiously
first this physical installation had a substantial dollar value attached to it --
they can bill me
i got a tab running
what 's second
this is clearly an important species we 're dealing with here
we ca n't just arbitrarily exterminate them --
bullshit
you son of a bitch
do n't make me pull rank ripley
what rank
i believe corporal hicks has authority here
corporal hicks
this operation is under military jurisdiction and hicks is next in chain of command
right
those specimens are worth millions to the bio weapons division
now if you 're smart we can both come out of this heroes
set up for life
you just try getting a dangerous organism past icc quarantine
section 22350 of the commerce code
you 've been doing your homework
look they ca n't impound it if they do n't know about it
but they will know about it burke
from me
just like they 'll know how you were responsible for the deaths of one hundred and fifty seven colonists here --
now wait a second --
you sent them to that ship
i just checked the colony log
directive dates six twelve seventy nine
signed burke carter j.
you sent them out there and you did n't even warn them burke
why did n't you warn them
look maybe the thing did n't even exist right
and if i 'd made it a major security situation the administration would 've stepped in
then no exclusive rights nothing
i expected more of you ripley
i thought you would be smarter than this
sorry to disappoint you
look we do n't know what 's going on out there
it may just be a down transmitter
but if it 's not i want you there
as an advisor
that 's all
you would n't be going in with the troops
i can guarantee your safety
these colonial marines are some tough hombres and they 're packing state of the art firepower
nothing they ca n't handle
right lieutenant
we 're trained to deal with these kinds of situations
still nothing from the colony
dead on all channels
looks like you company can write off its share of this colony
it 's insured
how may drops is this for you lieutenant
thirty eight
simulated
hold at forty
slow circle of the complex
the structure seems intact
they have power
one of us
apone
where are your people
anybody in d block
where are your parents
you have to try
gorman
give it a rest would you
what is it
i do n't know
proceed inside
so
so
then the fusion containment shuts down
so
so
get them out of there
do it now
shut up
just shut up
i told them to fall back
they 're but off
do something
are there any questions
hudson
how do i get out of this chicken shit outfit
all right the area 's secured
let 's go in and see what their computer can tell us
first team head for operations
hudson see if you can get their cpu on line
hicks meet me at the south lock by the up link tower
... we 're coming in
he 's coming in
i feel safer already
sir the cpu is on line
okay stand by in operations
let 's go
hah
stop your grinnin and drop your linen
found 'em
alive
unknown
but it looks like all of them
over at the processing station
sublevel c under the south tower
we 're not making that out too well
what is it
you tell me
i only work here
save it
sure hicks
let 's get the fuck out of here
not that tunnel the other one
well that 's great
that 's just fucking great man
now what the fuck are we supposed to do man
we 're in some real pretty shit now
are you finished
you okay
maybe we got 'em demoralized
i want you two walking the perimeter
i know we 're all in strung out shape but stay frosty and alert
we 've got to stop any entries before they get out of hand
the corner
ready
do it
seventeen meters
let 's get these things lit
well you 're not reading it right
six meters
five
what the fu --
let 's go
let 's go
fuckin a
removed surgically before embryo implantation
subject marachuk john l. died during procedure
they killed him getting it off
poor bastard
how long after we 're declared overdue can we expect a rescue
about seventeen days
all right
there 's a fire door at this end
the first thing we do is put a remote sentry in the tunnel and seal that door
we got ta figure on them getting into the complex
that 's right
so we put up welded barricades at these intersections
and seal these ducts here and here
then they can only come at us from these two corridors and we create a free field of fire for the other two sentry units here
newt time then can walk right up and knock
but they do n't know that
they 're probably looking for other ways to get in
that 'll take them awhile
they 'll get us
maybe
maybe not
hicks i 'm not going to wind up like those others
you 'll take care of it wo n't you it if comes to that
if it comes to that i 'll do us both
let 's see that it does n't here i 'd like to introduce you to a close personal friend of mine
what 's this
well that 's the grenade launcher
you probably do n't want to mess with that
look you started this
now show me everything
i can handle myself
yeah
i 've noticed
wait a minute
we 'd know about it
the only way it would work is if he sabotaged certain freezers on the trip back
then he could jettison the bodies and make up any story he liked
you know burke i do n't know which species is worse
you do n't see them screwing each other over for a fucking percentage
let 's waste him
no offense
it 's game time
get back here both of you
fall back to operations
they learned
they cut the power and avoided the guns
they must have found another way in something we missed
we did n't miss anything
locked
stand back
ellen
do n't be long ellen
hey vasquez
you ever been mistaken for a man
no
have you
somebody said alien
she thought they said illegal alien and signed up
fuck you
anytime
anywhere
all right we ca n't blow the fuck out of them
why not roll some canisters of cn-20 down there
nerve gas the whole nest
look man let 's just bug out and call it even okay
yeah bullshit
watch us
maybe you have n't been keeping up on current events but we just got out asses kicked pal
oh man
and i was gettin short too
four more weeks and out
now i 'm gon na buy it on this fuckin rock
it ai n't half fair man
hudson give us a break
it 's inside the complex
you 're just reading me
no
no
it ai n't you
they 're inside
inside the perimeter
they 're in here
sounds like you hicks
the embryo the second form hosts in the victim 's body for several hours
gestating
then it
then it
emerges
moults
grows rapidly --
man we 're not going to make it seventeen hours
those things are going to come in here just like they did before man
they 're going to come in here and get us man long before
she survived longer than that with no weapons and no training
this service tunnel is how they 're moving back and forth
yeah right it runs from the processing station right into the sublevel here
thanks
uh what 's next
we need the other drop ship
the on one the sulaco
we have to bring it down on remote somehow
how
the transmitter was on the apc
it 's wasted
i do n't care how
think of a way
think of something
think of what
we 're fucked
what about the colony transmitter
that up link tower down at the other end
why ca n't we use that
well then somebody 's just going to have to go out there
take a portable terminal and go out there and plug in manually
oh right
right
with those things running around
no way
they cut the power
what do you mean they cut the power
how could they cut the power man
they 're animals
this signal 's weird
must be some interference or something
there 's movement all over the place
just get back here
range twenty meters
seal the door
nine meters
eight
ca n't be
that 's inside the room
it 's readin right
look
you remember you sent some wildcatters out to that plateau out past the ilium range a couple days ago
yeah
what
there 's a guy on the horn mom and pop survey team
says he 's homing on something and wants to know if his claim will be honored
christ
some honch in a cushy office on earth says go look at a grid reference in the middle of nowhere we look
they do n't say why and i do n't ask
i do n't ask because it takes two weeks to get an answer out here and the answer 's always do n't ask
so what do i tell this guy
tell him as far as i 'm concerned he finds something it 's his
and how are we today
terrible
just terrible
that 's better than yesterday at least
how long have i been on gateway station
just a couple of days
do you feel up to a visitor
bad dreams again
do you want something to help you sleep
no
i 've slept enough
what did you say
newt
my n name 's newt
nobody calls me rebecca except my dork brother
casey
she 's my only friend
what about me
i do n't want you for a friend
why not
because you 'll be gone soon like the others
like everybody
you 'll be dead and you 'll leave me alone
they 'd be here if they could honey
i know they would
they 're dead
newt
look at me
newt
i wo n't leave you
i promise
you promise
cross my heart
and hope to die
now you just lie here and have a nap
you 're exhausted
i do n't want to
i have scary dreams
ripley
she does n't have bad dreams because she 's just a piece of plastic
oh
sorry newt
my mommy always said there were no monsters
no real ones
but there are
yes there are are n't there
why do they tell little kids that
well some kids ca n't handle it like you can
did one of those things grow inside her
i do n't know newt
that 's the truth
is n't that how babies come
i mean people babies
they grow inside you
no it 's different honey
did you ever have a baby
yes
a little girl
where is she
gone
you mean dead
do n't go
please
i 'll be right in the other room newt
and look
i can see you on that camera right up there
newt
newt wake up
wah
where are
sssh
do n't move
we 're in trouble
mommy
i mean ripley
i'm scared
i know honey
me too
this way
come on we 're almost there
newt wait
i knew you 'd come
newt i want you to hang on now
hang on tight
mommy
mommy
right here baby
right here
are we going to sleep now
that 's right
can we dream
yes honey
i think we both can
look i told you
it did not however contain any entries concerning the hostile life form you allegedly picked up
the analysis team which went over your shuttle centimeter by centimeter found no physical evidence of the creature you describe
that 's because i blew it out the goddamn airlock
like i said
look i can see where this is going
but i 'm telling you those things exist
back on that planetoid is an alien ship and on that ship are thousands of eggs
thousands
do you understand
i suggest you find it using the flight recorder 's data
find it and deal with it -- before one of your survey teams comes back with a little surprise
thank you officer ripley
that will be
... because just one of those things managed to kill my entire crew within twelve hours of hatching
why wo n't you check out lv-426
because i do n't have to
the people who live there checked it out years ago and they never reported and hostile organism or alien ship
and by the way they call it acheron now
what are you talking about
what people
follow me please
the archbishop would like a word
certainly
well i think that went off remarkably well do n't you
indeed
these viennese certainly know good music when they hear it
his grace is very angry with you
what do you mean
maestro
good morning
well
how do you like it
it 's turkish
my hairdresser tells me everything 's going to be turkish this year
really
what else did he tell you today
give me some gossip
well i heard you met herr mozart
oh
news travels fast in vienna
and he 's been commissioned to write an opera
is it true
yes
is there a part for me
no
how do you know
well even if there is i do n't think you want to get involved with this one
why not
well do you know where it 's set my dear
where
in a harem
what 's that
a brothel
oh
a turkish brothel
turkish
oh if it 's turkish that 's different
i want to be in it
my dear it will hardly enhance your reputation to be celebrated throughout vienna as a singing prostitute for a turk
oh
well perhaps you could introduce us anyway
perhaps
what does he look like
you might be disappointed
why
looks and talent do n't always go together katherina
looks do n't concern me maestro
only talent interests a woman of taste
did you know
had you heard
what
the marriage
well what does it matter to you
nothing
he can marry who he pleases
i do n't give a damn
how was i
tell me honestly
you were sublime
what did you think of the music
extremely clever
meaning you did n't like it
katherina
i 'll tell you what i 'm going to do
i 'm going to write another aria for you
something even more amazing for the second act
i have to get some water
her mother is lying on the stage
do n't bother
what
do n't bother
i 'll be right back
no no no no
you ca n't take him away now
this is his night
wo n't you introduce us wolfgang
excuse us fraulein
good night signore
no
i wo n't have him back
but he needs to be here in salzburg your grace
he needs me and he needs you
your protection your understanding
hardly
oh sir yes
he 's about to make the worst mistake of his life
some little viennese slut is trying to trick him into marriage
i know my son
he is too simple to see the trap and there is no one there who really cares for him
i 'm not surprised
money seems to be more important to him than loyalty or friendship
he has sold himself to vienna
let vienna look out for him
sir
your son is an unprincipled spoiled conceited brat
yes sir that 's the truth
but do n't blame him
the fault is mine
i was too indulgent with him
but not again
never again i promise
i implore you let me bring him back here
i 'll make him give his word to serve you faithfully
and how will you make him keep it
oh sir he 's never disobeyed me in anything
please your grace give him one more chance
you have leave to try
oh your grace i thank your grace
i thank you
why what sir
why do i have to be humiliated in front of my guests by one of my own servants
humiliated
how much provocation am i to endure from you
the more license i allow you the more you take
if his grace is not satisfied with me he can dismiss me
i wish you to return immediately to salzburg
your father is waiting for you there patiently
i will speak to you further when i come
no your grace
i mean with all humility no
i would rather you dismissed me
it 's obvious i do n't satisfy
then try harder mozart
i have no intention of dismissing you
you will remain in my service and learn your place
go now
don giovannnnnnnni
who the devil are you
what do you want
i 've come to dinnnnnner
dinner
how dare you
i am a nobleman
i only dine with people of my own height
are you drunk
you invited me
and my horse
here he is
ottavio
in the pot i have got a good dinner
not a sausage or stew but a singer
not a sausage or stew but a singer
is the treat that i 'll eat for my meat
oh shut up
i 'm sick to death of that tune
what is it
i want to go
where
i want to go back to vienna
now
yes
why
i feel wrong
i feel wrong being here
what are you talking about
stop it
i am
i am
i 'm stopping it slowly
you see
look i 've stopped
now we are going back
oh ha ha ha
sra i'm sick
sra i'm sick
yes you are
you 're very sick
no no
say it backwards shit wit
sra i'm sick say it backwards
sra i'm sick
sick kiss i 'm my kiss my
sra i'm sick kiss my arse
em iram
em iram
no i 'm not playing this game
no this is serious
say it backwards
no
just say it you 'll see
it 's very serious
em iram
em iram
iram marry em marry me
no no
you 're a fiend
i 'm not going to marry a fiend
a dirty fiend at that
ui vol i tub
tub but i tub but i vol love but i love ui you
i love you
tish i'm tee
what 's that
what
tish i'm tee
eat
yes
eat my ah
excuse me wolfi
mama is not feeling very well
can we leave now
of course
i think you 're mad
you 're really mad
oh leave me alone
one royal pupil and the whole of vienna will come flocking
we 'd be set up for life
they 'll come anyway
they love me here
no they will not
i know how things work in this city
oh yes
you always know everything
well i 'm not borrowing any more money from my mother and that 's that
you borrowed money from your mother
yes
well do n't do that again
how are we going to live wolfi
do you want me to go into the streets and beg
do n't be stupid
all they want to see is your work
what 's wrong with that
shut up
just shut up
i do n't need them
this is n't pride
it 's sheer stupidity
stop it now
stop it
i 've brought some friends to meet you
they 're next door waiting
do we have anything to eat
they 're all starving
tell them to go away
i do n't want to see anybody
what 's the matter with you
tell them to go
sssh
what is it
tell me
no
yes
i love you
i love you
my stanzi look at her
is n't she beautiful
come on now confess papa
could you want a prettier girl for a daughter
stop it wolfi
i look dreadful
welcome to our house herr mozart
he 's not herr mozart
call him papa
may i offer you some tea herr mozart
tea
who wants tea
let 's go out
this calls for a feast
you do n't want tea papa
let 's go dancing
papa loves parties do n't you
wolfi
what
how can you be so boring
tea
wolfi i think your father 's tired
i 'll cook us something here
there 's a young girl to see you
what does she want
i do n't know
well ask her
she wo n't talk to me
she says she has to speak to you
oh damn
half the receipts
stanzi
i 'm talking about now
how much will you give him now
down payment
you 're not going to do this
why not
half the house
when
we need money now
either he pays now or you do n't do it
oh stanzi
i do n't trust this man
and i did n't like what he did with your opera
it was common
well you liked it did n't you
monkey flunki punki
half the house
you 'll never see a penny
i want it here in my hand
stanzi manzi i 'll put it in your hand
shut up
i 'll not let you put anything in my hand until i see some money
who was that
no one
i heard voices
what 's that
oh
who gave you this
how much is it
wolfi who gave you this
i 'm not telling you
why not
you 'd think i was mad
no
do n't answer it
why
this is my wife stanzi
i 've been sick but i 'm all right now
are n't i
oh yes sir
he 's all right
and he 's working on it very hard
give me two more weeks
please
give me one reason i can understand
i ca n't write it
why not
it 's killing me
go back to bed
please
let me sit here
let me stay here with you
i promise i wo n't say all word
i 'll just be here so you know no one 's going to hurt you
please please
i will look at them of course the moment i can
it will be an honour
please give him my warmest
would it be too much trouble sir to ask you to look at them now
while i wait
i 'm afraid i 'm not at leisure this very moment
just leave them with me
i assure you they will be quite safe
i i really can not do that your excellency
you see he does n't know i 'm here
really
my husband is a proud man sir
he would be furious if he knew i 'd come
then he did n't send you
no sir
this is my own idea
i see
sir we really need this job
we 're desperate
my husband spends far more than he can ever earn
i do n't mean he 's lazy he 's not at all he works all day long
it 's just
he 's not practical
money simply slips through his fingers it 's really ridiculous your excellency
i know you help musicians
you 're famous for it
give him just this one post
we 'd be forever indebted
thank you very much your excellency
do n't keep calling me that
it puts me at such a distance
i was not born a court composer you know
i 'm from a small town just like your husband
are you sure you ca n't leave that music and come back again
i have other things you might like
that 's very tempting but it 's impossible i 'm afraid
wolfi would be frantic if he found those were missing
you see they 're all originals
originals
yes
these are originals
yes sir
he does n't make copies
it is miraculous
oh yes
he 's really proud of his work
tomorrow night i dine with the emperor
one word from me and the post is his
oh thank you sir
come back tonight
tonight
alone
what for
some service deserves service in return
no
what do you mean
is n't it obvious
it 's a post all vienna seeks
if you want it for your husband come tonight
but
i 'm a married woman
then do n't
it 's up to you
not to be vague that is the price
this is not his handwriting
no
i was assisting him
he asked me
he 's not going to work on this anymore
it is making him ill
please
i regret we have no servants to show you out herr salieri
respect my wish and go
madame i will respect his
he asked me to stay here
how much will you pay him
ah
well
ah i see you 've got your manager with you
well madame how about half the receipts
am i interrupting something
not at all
where 's our friend
he 's not in
but he 's working on it
he said to tell you
i hope so
i need it immediately
look you little clown do you know how many people i 've hired for you
do you know how many people are waiting
leave him alone
i 'm paying these people
do you realize that
he 's doing his best
i 'm paying people just to wait for you
it 's ridiculous
you know what 's ridiculous
your libretto that 's what 's ridiculous
only an idiot would ask wolfi to work on that stuff
oh yes
and what 's so intelligent about writing a requiem
money
money
you 're mad
she 's mad wolfi
oh yes and who are you
he 's worked for kings
for the emperor
who are you
i see that you 're expecting
oh yes
when may i ask
in three months
papa
what is ridiculous
wolfi has many admirers in vienna
they love him here
people send us gifts all the time
but you ca n't take her without reference
it 's unheard of
well this is none of your business
whoever sent you is going to pay no
and so you do
the only time you come out is to eat
and what do you expect
who wants to walk out into a mess like this every day
oh now i 'm a bad housekeeper
so you are
the place is a pigsty all the time
do you hear him
do you
behold
behold
hey
hey
behold
behold
let us pass please
let us pass at once
we 're with the emperor
i am sorry madame
it is not permitted
do you know who i am
this is my daughter
i am frau weber
we are favoured guests
i am sorry madame but i have my orders
call herr mozart
you call herr mozart immediately
this is insupportable
i am sorry madame but no
i can not let anyone pass
young man i am no stranger to theatres
i 'm no stranger to insolence
upstairs
gertrude
you ca n't be herr mozart
i 've heard about you for ages
i thought you must be an old man
gertrude
it 's such an honour for us to have you here herr mozart
and for gertrude
people who know say the girl 's got talent
you must judge for yourself
if you think she stinks say so
michael please
i 'm sure you will find her most willing herr mozart
she 's really very excited
she 's been preparing all morning
i said play
michael
perhaps a little refreshment first
a little coffee or a little chocolate
i 'd like a little wine if you have it
wine
just one year
who was your teacher
i was
but she quite outgrew the little i could show her
thank you madame
come on now courage
play me something you know
i think it is an interesting notion to keep mozart in vienna majesty
it should really infuriate the archbishop beyond measure if that is your majesty 's intention
you are cattivo court composer
i want to meet this young man
chamberlain arrange a pleasant welcome for him
what a charming idea
may i see
it 's just a trifle of course
may i try it
majesty
delightful court composer
would you permit me to play it as he comes in
you do me too much honour sire
let 's have some fun
bring in herr mozart please
but slowly slowly
i need a minute to practice
a flat majesty
ah ha
and here is our illustrious court composer herr salieri
finally
such an immense joy
diletto straordinario
my pleasure
well there it is
now to business
young man we are going to commission an opera from you
what do you say
oh your majesty it would be such a tremendous honour
i 'm thinking about herr mozart
what is your view
an interesting idea majesty
but
yes
you already commissioned an opera from mozart
and the result satisfies
yes of course
my concern is to protect you from any suspicion of favouritism
ah ha
favouritism
but i so want mozart
i 'm sure there is a way majesty
some kind of a little contest
i could perhaps put together a small committee and i could see to it naturally that it will select according to your majesty 's wishes
you please me court composer
a very clever idea
sire
well
there it is
i do n't think you understand me court composer
majesty i did
believe me it was a most agonizing
decision
but finally i simply could not recommend herr mozart
why not
well sire i made some inquiries in a routine way
i was curious to know why he had so few pupils
it is rather alarming
oh
majesty i do n't like to talk against a fellow musician
of course not
i have to tell you mozart is not entirely to be trusted alone with young ladies
really
as a matter of fact one of my own pupils a very young singer told me she was er well
yes
molested majesty
twice in the course of the same lesson
do you like this salieri
it is not a question of liking your majesty
your own law decrees it i 'm afraid
well look at them
your majesty
no no please
it is not a holy relic
you know we have met already
in this very room
perhaps you wo n't remember it you were only six years old
he was giving the most brilliant little concert here
as he got off the stool he slipped and fell
my sister antoinette helped him up herself and do you know what he did
jumped straight into her arms and said will you marry me yes or no
oh thank you
the director of our opera
count orsini rosenberg
oh sir yes
the honour is mine
absolutely
and now he has returned the compliment
herr salieri composed that march of welcome for you
really
oh grazie signore
sono commosso
e un onore per mo eccezionale
compositore brilliante e famossissimo
well what is it about
tell us the story
it 's actually quite amusing majesty
it 's set the whole thing is set in a in a
yes where
in a pasha 's harem majesty
a seraglio
ah ha
keep it sire if you want to
it is already here in my head
what
on one hearing only
i think so sire yes
it is new it is is n't it sire
yes indeed
and german
oh yes
absolutely
german
unquestionably
so then you like it
you really like it your majesty
of course i do
it 's very good
of course now and then just now and then it gets a touch elaborate
what do you mean sire
well i mean occasionally it seems to have how shall one say
how shall one say director
i do n't understand
there are just as many notes majesty as are required
neither more nor less
my dear fellow there are in fact only so many notes the ear can hear in the course of an evening
i think i 'm right in saying that are n't i court composer
my dear young man do n't take it too hard
your work is ingenious
it 's quality work
and there are simply too many notes that 's all
cut a few and it will be perfect
which few did you have in mind majesty
majesty this is madame weber
she is my landlady
enchanted madame
really
how delightful
may i ask when you marry
well well we have n't quite received my father 's consent your majesty
not entirely
not altogether
majesty may i ask you to do me the greatest favour
what is it
may i introduce my father
he is on a short visit here and returning very soon to salzburg
he would so much like to kiss your hand
it would make his whole stay so memorable for him
ah
by all means
mozart are you aware i have declared the french play of figaro unsuitable for our theatre
yes sire
yet we hear you are making an opera from it
is this true
who told you this majesty
it is not your place to ask questions
is it true
well yes i admit it is
would you tell me why
well majesty it is only a comedy
mozart i am a tolerant man
i do not censor things lightly
when i do i have good reason
figaro is a bad play
it stirs up hatred between the classes
in france it has caused nothing but bitterness
my own dear sister antoinette writes me that she is beginning to be frightened of her own people
i do not wish to see the same fears starting here
sire i swear to your majesty there 's nothing like that in the story
i have taken out everything that could give offense
i hate politics
i think you are rather innocent my friend
in these dangerous times i can not afford to provoke our nobles or our people simply over a theatre piece
but majesty this is just a frolic
it 's a piece about love
ah love again
but it 's new it 's entirely new
it 's so new people will go mad for it
for example i have a scene in the second act it starts as a duet just a man and wife quarreling
suddenly the wife 's scheming little maid comes in unexpectedly a very funny situation
duet turns into trio
then the husband 's equally screaming valet comes in
trio turns into quartet
then a stupid old gardener quartet becomes quintet and so on
on and on sextet septet octet
how long do you think i can sustain that
i have no idea
guess
guess majesty
imagine the longest time such a thing could last then double it
well six or seven minutes
maybe eight
twenty sire
how about twenty
twenty minutes of continuous music
no recitatives
forgive me majesty
i 'm a vulgar man
but i assure you my music is not
you are passionate mozart
but you do not persuade
sire the whole opera is finished
do you know how much work went into it
ah ha
well then we should make some effort to acquire him
we could use a good german composer in vienna surely
i agree majesty but i 'm afraid it 's not possible
the young man is still in the pay of the archbishop
very small pay i imagine
i 'm sure he could be tempted with the right offer
say an opera in german for our national theatre
ah ha
what do you say chamberlain
in my opinion it is time we had a piece in our own language sir
plain german
for plain people
yes sir
well
there it is
why are you here
am i not welcome
of course welcome
welcome ten thousand times
papa
my papa
feed
well of course she feeds me
she stuffs me like a goose all day long
she 's the best cook in the world
i mean since mama
just wait you 'll see
is she not here
i do n't know
stanzi
stanzi
do you always live like this
oh yes
oh i mean no not exactly like this
i mean today just today stanzi i remember now
she had to go yes
she had to help her mother
yes she 's like that
her mother 's a very sweet woman you 'll see
she 's very tired poor creature
you know me i 'm a real pig
it 's not so easy cleaning up after me
do n't you have a maid
oh we could if we wanted to but stanzi wo n't hear of it
she wants to do everything herself
how is your financial situation
it could n't be better
that 's not what i hear
what do you mean
it 's wonderful
really it 's it 's marvelous
people love me here
they say you 're in debt
who
who says that
now that 's a malicious lie
how many pupils do you have
pupils
yes
yes
how many
i do n't know
it 's not important
i mean i do n't want pupils
they get in the way
i 've got to have time for composition
composition does n't pay
you know that
this one will
what 's that
oh let 's not talk about it
why not
it 's a secret
you do n't have secrets from me
it 's too dangerous papa
but they 're going to love it
ah there she is
is n't that marvelous
we 're delighted
why did n't you mention it in your letters
did n't i
i thought i did
i 'm sure i did
thank you
that 'll be fine
do n't spend any money on me
why not
oh come papa
what better way could i spend it than on you
my kissable missable suddenly visible papa
no really
this is just a game papa
papa is this your idea
mine
are you playing a trick on me
i never saw this girl in my life
is this a kind of joke
never mind
you wo n't have to do anything for me ever again
i 'm leaving
papa
do n't worry i 'm not staying here to be a burden
no one calls you that
she does
she says i sleep all day
father
hush
i 'm talking to his majesty
your majesty i wish to express only one thing that you who are the father of us all could teach our children the gratitude they owe to fathers
it is not for nothing that the fifth commandment tells us honour your father and mother that your days may be long upon the earth
ah
here she comes
fraulein lorl good morning
good morning sir
what have you got for me today
let me see
ah ha
siena macaroons my favourites
give my best thanks to the baker
i will sir
thank you
are you well today fraulein lorl
yes thank you sir
bene
bene
madame cavalieri is here for her lesson sir
bene
where does he work
in there sir
now calm yourself
calm
what 's the matter with you
i 'm leaving
i 'm not working there anymore
i 'm scared
why
what has happened
you do n't know what it 's like
herr mozart frightens me
he drinks all day then takes all that medicine and it makes him worse
what medicine
i do n't know
he has pains
where
here in his stomach
they bend him right over
is he working
i 'm frightened sir
really
when he speaks he does n't make any sense
you know he said he saw he said he saw his father
and his father 's dead
is he working
i suppose so
he sits there all he time doing some silly opera
opera
opera
please do n't ask me to go back again
i 'm frightened
i 'm very very frightened
are you sure it 's an opera
yes
are you herr mozart
that 's right
my name is lorl sir
i 'm a maidservant
i was asked to come here and offer my services to you
what
they 'll be paid for by a great admirer or yours who wishes to remain anon anonymous
are you saying that someone is paying you to be our maid and does n't want us to know who he is
yes
i can live in or out just as you wish
sssh
stanzi manzi banzi wanzi
sssh
stay here
what did he say
what did he say
papa the rule is you can only give penalties that can be performed in the room
well
sublime
utterly sublime
that kind of music should be punishable by death
wonderful
he liked the monkey did n't you
yes well it 's all good fun
i liked the horse
leave that alone
wolfi
put it down
what is this
put it down i said
it 's nothing for you
oh
i 'm sorry
i 'm sorry
what have you got for me
is it finished
what
what
the vaudeville what 'd you think
yes
can i see it
no
why not
because there 's nothing to see
look i asked you if we could start rehearsal next week and you said yes
well we can
so let me see it
where is it
quiet
quiet
quiet
down there damn you
welcome to you
pay no attention they 're impossible
stop it you willful things
come this way
just ignore them
they 're perfectly harmless just willful
i treat them just like my own children
and which one of them do you want me to teach
what
ha ha
that 's funny i like it
which one eh
you 're a funny fellow
hannah
come this way
you wo n't be teaching this one either
she 's my wife
madame
this is herr mozart my dear
the young man herr salieri recommended to teach our gertrude
where is she
i 'm afraid i am
of course it 's him
who do you think it is
good morning fraulein schlumberg
strudel this is herr mozart
say good morning
never mind strudel
it 's part of music getting used to an audience
are n't i right herr mozart
well yes
on the whole
i suppose
how long have you been playing fraulein
it 's a miracle herr mozart
well i 'm a good teacher
the next time you wish me to instruct another of your dogs please let me know
goodbye fraulein goodbye madame
goodbye sir
i know your work well signore
do you know i actually composed some variations on a melody of yours
really
mio caro adone
ah
a funny little tune but it yielded some good things
love sire
ah love
well of course in italy we know nothing about that
yes
yes
er on the whole yes majesty
but this is absurd
dear mozart my sincere congratulations
did you like it then
how could i not
it really is the best music one can hear in vienna today
do n't you agree
herr mozart what brings you here
your excellency you requested some specimens of my work
here they are
i do n't have to tell you how much i need your help
i truly appreciate your looking at these
i have pressures on me financial pressures
as you know i 'm a married man now
so you are
how is your pretty wife
she is well
she is well actually i 'm about to become a father
she only told me last night
you are the first to know
i 'm flattered
and congratulations to you of course
so you see this post is very important to me right now
why did n't you come to me yesterday mozart
this is a most painful situation
yesterday i could have helped you
today i ca n't
why
here is the music
it 's here
i am submitting it humbly
is n't that what you wanted
i have just come from the palace
the post has been filled
filled
that 's impossible
they have n't even seen my work
i need this post
please ca n't you help me
please
my dear mozart there is no one in the world i would rather help but now it is too late
whom did they choose
herr sommer
sommer
herr sommer
but the man 's a fool
he 's a total mediocrity
no no no he has yet to achieve mediocrity
but i ca n't lose this post i simply ca n't
excellency please
let 's go to the palace and you can explain to the emperor that herr sommer is an awful choice
he could actually do musical harm to the princess
an implausible idea
between you and me no one in the world could do musical harm to the princess elizabeth
look i must have pupils
without pupils i ca n't manage
you do n't mean to tell me you are living in poverty
no but i 'm broke
i 'm always broke
i do n't know why
it has been said my friend that you are inclined to live somewhat above your means
how can anyone say that
we have no cook no maid
we have no footman
nothing at all
how is that possible
you give concerts do n't you
i hear they are quite successful
they 're stupendously successful
you ca n't get a seat
the only problem is none will hire me
they all want to hear me play but they wo n't let me teach their daughters
as if i was some kind of fiend
i 'm not a fiend
of course not
do you have a daughter
i 'm afraid not
well could you lend me some money till you have one
then i 'll teach her for free
that 's a promise
oh i 'm sorry
i 'm being silly
papa 's right i should put a padlock on my mouth
seriously is there any chance you could manage a loan
only for six months eight at most
after that i 'll be the richest man in vienna
i 'll pay you back double
anything
name your terms
i 'm not joking
i 'm working on something that 's going to explode like a bomb all over europe
ah how exciting
tell me more
i 'd better not
it 's a bit of a secret
come come mozart i 'm interested
truly
actually it 's a big secret
oh this is delicious
what is it
cream cheese mixed with granulated sugar and suffused with rum
crema al mascarpone
ah
italian
forgive me
we all have patriotic feelings of some kind
two thousand two hundred florins is all i need a hundred
fifty
what exactly are you working on
i ca n't say
really
i do n't think you should become known in vienna as a debtor mozart
however i know a very distinguished gentleman i could recommend to you
and he has a daughter
will that do
wolfgang what is it
sta calmo per favore
what 's the matter
it 's unbelievable
the director has actually ripped out a huge section of my music
pages of it
really
why
i do n't know
they say i 've got to re write the opera but it 's perfect as it is
i ca n't rewrite what 's perfect
ca n't you talk to him
why bother with orsini rosenberg
he 's obviously no friend of yours
oh i could kill him
i mean really kill him
i actually threw the entire opera on the fire he made me so angry
you burned the score
oh no
my wife took it out in time
how fortunate
it 's not fair that a man like that has power over our work
but there are those who have power over him
i think i 'll take this up with the emperor
oh excellency would you
with all my heart mozart
thank you
oh thank you
i have come to commission work from you
what work
a mass for the dead
what dead
who is dead
a man who deserved a requiem mass and never got one
who are you
i am only a messenger
do you accept
you will be paid well
how much
how long will you give me
work fast
and be sure to tell no one what you do
you will see me again soon
i do n't have it yet
it 's not finished
i 'm sorry but i need more time
are you neglecting my request
no no
i promise you i 'll give you a wonderful piece the best i ever can
what happened
is it over
i 'm taking you home
you 're not well
no no
i have to get back
i have
where is your wife
not here
she 's not well either
she went to the spa
you mean she 's not coming back
you 're so good to me
truly
thank you
no please
i mean to come to my opera
you are the only colleague who did
i would never miss anything that you had written
you must know that
this is only a vaudeville
oh no
it is a sublime piece
the grandest operone
i tell you you are the greatest composer known to me
do you mean that
i do
i have bad fancies
i do n't sleep well anymore
then i drink too much and think stupid things
are you ill
the doctor thinks i am
but
what
i 'm too young to be so sick
shall i answer it
no
no it 's him
who
the man
he 's here
what man
wait
ask him if he 'd give me some money now
tell him if he would that would help me finish it
finish what
he knows
he knows
confutatis maledictis
we ended in f major
yes
so now a minor
suddenly
the fire
what time
common time
start with the voices
basses first
second beat of the first measure a. con fu ta tis
second measure second beat
ma le dic tis
g sharp of course
yes
third measure second beat starting on e. flam mis a cri bus ad dic tis
and fourth measure fourth beat d. ma le dic tis flam mis a cri bus ad- dic tis
do you have that
i think so
sing it back
good
now the tenors
fourth beat of the first measure c. con fu ta tis
second measure fourth beat on d. ma le dic tis
all right
yes
fourth measure second beat f. flam mis a cri bus ad dic tis flam- mis a cri bus ad dic tis
now the orchestra
second bassoon and bass trombone with the basses
identical notes and rhythm
the first bassoon and tenor trombone
please
just one moment
it could n't be simpler
first bassoon and tenor trombone what
with the tenors
also identical
exactly
the instruments to go with the voices
trumpets and timpani tonic and dominant
and that 's all
oh no
now for the fire
strings in unison ostinato on all like this
do you have me
i think so
show me
and that 's it
do you have it
you go fast
do you have it
yes
then let me hear it
all of it
the whole thing from the beginning now
do you want to rest a bit
oh no
i 'm not tired at all
we 'll stop for just a moment
then we 'll do the lacrimosa
i can keep going i assure you
shall we try
would you stay with me while i sleep a little
i 'm not leaving you
i am so ashamed
what for
i was foolish
i thought you did not care for my work or me
forgive me
forgive me
oh
have i seen it
i i do n't think you have herr director
not yet
i mean it 's quite n of course i 'll show it to you immediately
i think you 'd better
you mean in turkey
exactly
then why especially does it have to be in german
well not especially
it can be in turkish if you really want
i do n't care
what you think mozart is scarcely the point
it is what his majesty thinks that counts
but your majesty
that will do herr mozart
just let me tell you how it begins
mozart
herr mozart may i have a word with you please
right away
certainly herr director
did you not know that his majesty has expressly forbidden ballet in his operas
yes but this is not a ballet
this is a dance at figaro 's wedding
exactly
a dance
but surely the emperor did n't mean to prohibit dancing when it 's part of the story
it is dangerous for you to interpret his majesty 's edicts
give me your score please
what is this herr chamberlain
what is what
why do i have to submit samples of my work to some stupid committee
just to teach a sixteen year old girl
because his majesty wishes it
is the emperor angry with me
on the contrary
then why does n't he simply appoint me to the post
mozart you are not the only composer in vienna
no but i 'm the best
a little modesty would suit you better
who is on this committee
kapellmeister bonno count orsini- rosenberg and court composer salieri
naturally the italians
of course
always the italians
mozart
they hate my music
it terrifies them
the only sound italians understand is banality
tonic and dominant tonic and dominant from here to resurrection
ba ba
ba ba
ba ba
ba ba
anything else is morbid
mozart
show them one interesting modulation and they faint
ohime
morbidezza
morbidezza
italians are musical idiots and you want them to judge my music
look young man the issue is simple
if you want this post you must submit your stuff in the same way as all your colleagues
must i
well i wo n't
i tell you straight i will not
herr mozart
may i just do that majesty
show you how it begins
just that
i do n't think it was really decided director
oh german
german
please let it be german
my dear fellow the language is not finally the point
do you really think that subject is quite appropriate for a national theatre
why not
it 's charming
i mean i do n't actually show concubines exposing their
their
it 's not indecent
it 's highly moral majesty
it 's full of proper german virtues
i swear it
absolutely
well done mozart
really quite fine
baron
mozart
sire only opera can do this
in a play if more than one person speaks at the same time it 's just noise
no one can understand a word
but with music with music you can have twenty individuals all talking at once and it 's not noise it 's a perfect harmony
is n't that marvelous
mozart music is not the issue here
no one doubts your talent
it is your judgment of literature that 's in question
even with the politics taken out this thing would still remain a vulgar farce
why waste your spirit on such rubbish
surely you can choose more elevated themes
elevated
what does that mean
elevated
the only thing a man should elevate is oh excuse me
i 'm sorry
i 'm stupid
but i am fed up to the teeth with elevated things
old dead legends
how can we go on forever writing about gods and legends
because they do
they go on forever at least what they represent
the eternal in us not the ephemeral
opera is here to ennoble us
you and me just as much as his majesty
what do you want
i am father vogler
i am a chaplain here
i thought you might like to talk to someone
about what
you tried to take your life
you do remember that do n't you
so
in the sight of god that is a sin
what do you want
do you understand that you have sinned
gravely
leave me alone
i can not leave alone a soul in pain
do you know who i am
you never heard of me did you
that makes no difference
all men are equal in god 's eyes
are they
offer me your confession
i can offer you god 's forgiveness
i do not seek forgiveness
my son there is something dreadful on your soul
unburden it to me
i 'm here only for you
please talk to me
how well are you trained in music
i know a little
i studied it in my youth
where
here in vienna
then you must know this
i ca n't say i do
what is it
i 'm surprised you do n't know
it was a very popular tune in its day
i wrote it
how about this
do you hear me
he was murdered father
mozart
cruelly murdered
it was incomprehensible
what was god up to
here i was denying all my natural lust in order to deserve god 's gift and there was mozart indulging his in all directions even though engaged to be married
and no rebuke at all
was it possible i was being tested
was god expecting me to offer forgiveness in the face of every offense no matter how painful
that was very possible
all the same why him
why use mozart to teach me lessons in humility
my heart was filling up with such hatred for that little man
for the first time in my life i began to know really violent thoughts
i could n't stop them
did you try
every day
sometimes for hours i would pray
yes father
yes
so much for my vow of chastity
what did it matter
good patient hard working chaste what did it matter
had goodness made me a good composer
i realized it absolutely then that moment goodness is nothing in the furnace of art
and i was nothing to god
you can not say that
no
was mozart a good man
god 's ways are not yours
and you are not here to question him
offer him the salt of penitence
he will give you back the bread of eternal life
he is all merciful
that is all you need to know
all i ever wanted was to sing to him
that 's his doing is n't it
he gave me that longing then made me mute
why
tell me that
if he did n't want me to serve him with music why implant the desire like a lust in my body then deny me the talent
go on tell me
speak for him
my son no one can speak for god
oh
i thought you did so every day
so speak now
answer me
i do not claim to unravel the mysteries
i treasure them
as you should
oh yes yes yes yes yes
always the same stale answers
there is no god of mercy father
just a god of torture
what
his funeral imagine it
the cathedral all vienna sitting there
his coffin mozart 's little coffin in the middle
and suddenly in that silence music
a divine music bursts out over them all a great mass of death requiem mass for wolfgang mozart composed by his devoted friend antonio salieri
what sublimity
what depth
what passion in the music
salieri has been touched by god at last
and god forced to listen
powerless powerless to stop it
i at the end for once laughing at him
do you understand
do you
yes
the only thing that worried me was the actual killing
how does one do that
how does one kill a man
it 's one thing to dream about it
it 's very different when you have to do it with your own hands
why
why
why
why add to your misery by confessing to murder
you did n't kill him
i did
no you did n't
i poisoned his life
but not his body
what difference does that make
my son why should you want all vienna to believe you a murderer
is that your penance
is it
no father
from now on no one will be able to speak of mozart without thinking of me
whenever they say mozart with love they 'll have to say salieri with loathing
and that 's my immortality at last
our names will be tied together for eternity his in fame and mine in infamy
at least it 's better than the total oblivion he 'd planned for me your merciful god
oh my son my poor son
do n't pity me
pity yourself
you serve a wicked god
he killed mozart not i. took him snatched him away without pity
he destroyed his beloved rather than let a mediocrity like me get the smallest share in his glory
he does n't care
understand that
god cares nothing for the man he denies and nothing either for the man he uses
he broke mozart in half when he 'd finished with him and threw him away
like an old worn out flute
i 've just learned something that might be of interest to you herr director
yes
mozart is writing a new opera
an italian opera
italian
you mean that play
exactly
he 's setting that play to music
yes
you must be mad
are you absolutely sure
i 've seen the manuscript
where
never mind
bravo your majesty
well done sire
well actually sire if you remember we did finally incline to italian
did we
i know we banned this play but frankly i ca n't remember why
can you refresh my memory herr director
for the same reason herr chamberlain that it was banned in france
oh yes yes
and that was
well the play makes a hero out of a valet
he outwits his noble master and exposes him as a lecher
do you see the implications
this would be in a grander situation as if a chamberlain were to expose an emperor
ah
here i am my angel
what
who the devil are you
i 've taken pity on you my angel
i heard your wish
oh
well thank you
how wonderful
some people get all the luck
now you 've got to promise me faithfully you 'll remain true to me forever
then you 'll see how tenderly your little birdie will love you
i ca n't wait
well promise then
what do you mean now
of course now
right away before i get any older
well i do n't know
i mean you 're a delicious delightful delectable little bird but do n't you think you might be just a little tough
oh i 'm tender enough for you my boy
i 'm tender enough for you
this is embarrassing you know
you introduced mozart to some of my friends and he 's begging from practically all of them
it has to stop
i agree baron
ca n't you think of anyone who might commission some work from him
i 've done my best
i got him to arrange some bach for my sunday concerts
he got a fee what i could afford
ca n't you think of anyone who might do something for him
no baron no
i 'm afraid mozart is a lost cause
he has managed to alienate practically the whole of vienna
he is constantly drunk
he never pays his debts
i ca n't think of one person to whom i dare recommend him
how sad
it 's tragic is n't it
such a talent
indeed
just a moment as a matter of fact i think i do know someone who could commission a work from him
a very appropriate person to do so
yes
excuse me sir there is a lady who insists on talking to you
who is she
she did n't say
but she says it 's urgent
excuse me my dear
herr salieri
yes i am looking after him
can we come in
well he 's sleeping now
better not
but he 's all right
oh yes
he 's just exhausted
he became dizzy that 's all
we should let him rest
well tell him we were here wo n't you
of course
and say everything went wonderfully
a triumph de luxe say that
tell him the audience shouted his name a hundred times
bene
i 'll call tomorrow
yes
and congratulations to all of you
it was superb
oh by the way give him this
this is his share
that should cheer him up eh
yes indeed
goodnight to you all now
it was perfection truly
has the patient in twenty one gotten his tray yet
the american
yes duck
how did he look
what do you mean how did he look
you know did he seem depressed
do you think he 'll eat the food
i 'm an orderly not a bleeding psychiatrist
i push things about but i 've little say what happens to them
thank you
dr. hirsch mr. kessler cried out a minute ago
miss gallagher surely you must perform some function here at the hospital
can i be of service miss price
dr. hirsch
go about your duties
yes doctor
oh miss price
yes doctor
what exactly did he call out
he said jack
that would be jack goodman the boy who was killed
what happened to them
the police report said an escaped lunatic attacked them
he must have been a very powerful man
although i really do n't see that it is any of your concern miss price
no sir
of course sir
good day doctor
did he say a wolf
yes i believe he did
it 's all right susan
yes doctor i have
come to my office miss price
you 've absolutely no idea where david might be
no
he knows no one in london besides me
i should n't have left him alone
surely you 're not suggesting
david has suffered a severe trauma
i myself witnessed some form of mass neurosis in east proctor
if all the villagers believe that jack goodman was killed by a werewolf why should n't david
and then it follows that if he survived an attack by a werewolf would n't he himself become a werewolf the next full moon
dr. hirsch
oh i do n't mean running about on all fours and howling at the moon
but in such a deranged state he could harm himself or perhaps others
what shall we do
let 's call the police and see if they can help us find our wandering boy
he 's here
is he all right
why did n't you call me
where was he
he does n't remember
he woke up at the zoo
the zoo
is he rational
yes he is
he 's very excited and confused but he 's not crazy if that 's what you mean
have you read the papers today
have you listened to the radio or television
no why
is david acting strangely
no not really
could you get here without any trouble
yes i should think so
right
now listen carefully
i want you to bring david here
i want him in my care
i 'll notify the police that we 've found him
it is imperative that you bring him straight to the hospital
do you understand
yes doctor
you 're certain he 's lucid
you wo n't need any help
he 's fine
we 'll come right over
shall i send a car
no a cab will be faster
i expect you shortly
what shall we do
tea would be nice
nurse hobbs said there 's a disturbance in leicester square involving some sort of mad dog
david
i doubt it
but it 's something to do
it was n't a lunatic
i beg your pardon
it was a wolf
what
a wolf
mr. kessler
yes
you have n't eaten your lunch
i 'm not very hungry thank you
i 'm afraid you have to eat something
please really
i 'm not hungry
you put me in an awkward position mr. kessler
how is that
well you 're to take these after you 've eaten
now what kind of nurse would i be if i failed in so simple a task as giving out some pills
leave the pills
i 'll take them later
sorry
let 's try a little harder shall we
will you give me a break
you 're a very beautiful girl
i thought you were asleep
i was
what are you reading
a connecticut yankee in king arthur 's court by mark twain
do you like it
i 've just started it
my friend gave it to me
what do you dream about
i dream of death mostly
i 'm sorry
i should n't have asked you
it 's okay
i want to talk to you
how old are you
that 's not really a very proper question
how old are you
twenty eight
i 'm twenty seven
i know
now what do you want to talk about
was jack goodman your good friend
my best friend
my very best friend
shall i read to you
what
oh yes please
a connecticut yankee in king arthur 's court by samuel l. clemens
this is after the preface but before chapter one a word of explanation
you all right
yes go on
ahem a word of explanation
it was in warwick castle that i came across the curious stranger whom i am going to talk about
he attracted me by three things his candid simplicity his marvelous familiarity with ancient armor and the restfulness of his company for he did all the talking
we fell together as modest people will in the tail of the herd
hello
you all right
i 'm sorry i woke you up
do n't be silly
can i get you something
no thank you
just keep me company for a while
that 's easy enough
i keep having these really terrible dreams
they are getting worse and i ca n't seem to stop them
david your dreams will stop
you 'll leave england and your bad memories and then this will all fade away
will you come with me
what
i 'm serious
you do n't know me and i know nothing about you
we have a perfect relationship
now david i said i would keep you company but i meant right here and now
will you think about it
how did we get from your bad dreams to my taking a holiday with a patient
not just a patient -- me
you 're being awfully forward are n't you
forgive me i 'm trying to cheer myself up and an affair with a beautiful nurse seemed like just the thing to do it
all i am to you is a sex fantasy then
now i 'm embarrassed
good
i thought for a moment i was the only embarrassed one in the room
i 'm a werewolf
a werewolf
are you better now
i 'll let you know the next full moon
you 're to be discharged tomorrow
will you be all right
my friend jack was just here
your dead friend jack
yeah
he says that i will become a monster in two days
what do you think
what do i think
you mean about the possibility of your becoming a monster in two days or about visits from dead friends
i was dreaming again
i would think so
yeah i would think so too
it 's nice to see you
it 's nice to see you
alex
yes
will you be here in about fifteen minutes
of course
good
david you do n't honestly believe that in reality your friend jack rose from the grave to breakfast with you
do you really
i was awake and he was in my room
but david
i was n't hallucinating
tomorrow is the full moon
that 's good alex
reassure me
let me go now you 'll make me late
do me an enormous favor
anything
tell me that it 's silly of me to be apprehensive
it 's silly of you to be apprehensive
werewolves simply do not exist
david do you want me to stay here tonight
yeah i do but go to work
listen if you get too anxious call me at the hospital okay
okay
i 've left those pills for you
a doper werewolf
i 'm off
there 's food in the fridge
see you later
david
where on earth have you been
i 'm freezing
but
pull over
david what are you doing
six people mutilated
it had to be me alex
david stop
i am going to the cops
there 's a full moon tonight
jack was right
i
jack is dead
jack is dead
look six people have been killed
i 'm going to the police
david please be rational
let 's go to dr. hirsch
rational
i 'm a fucking werewolf for christ 's sake
he 's playing a stupid joke sir
what
we had an argument
he 's being silly
i swear i do n't know this girl
sir he 's very upset
his friend was killed and
will you shut up
hopeless
it 's hopeless
david let 's go now
leave me alone dammit
you people are crazy
i 've got to get away from here
i 've got to do something
david do n't lose control
control
what control
get away from me
how are we feeling tonight
no
no what
no
benjamin have you ever been severely beaten about the face and neck
no
i thought not
he all right
yes i should think
he called out just now
he 's an american you know
dr. hirsch is going to fetch round one of those embassy fellows to see him
chart says he 's from new york
i think he 's a jew
why on earth do you say that
i looked
really susan i do n't think that was very proper and besides it 's common practice now
miss price
yes mrs. hobbs
take these round now will you please
the american boy in twenty one is only to have these after he 's eaten
will you be sure of that
has he been refusing food
nothing quite as dramatic as that miss price
he just does n't eat enough of what is put before him
he suffers from nightmares
i 'd think he just needs a hand to hold
yes mrs. hobbs
officer i killed those people last night
you did did you
all right you two move along
hey you asshole
i want you to arrest me
there 's no call for that kind of language
queen elizabeth is a man
prince charles is a faggot
winston churchill was full of shit
now see here young man
shakespeare was french
the queen mother sucks cocks in hell
shit
fuck
piss
who is this girl
you 're going to have to stop this disturbance or i shall arrest you
that 's what i want you to do you moron
why are you doing this to me jack
this is n't mr. goodman 's idea
he is your good friend whereas i am a victim of your carnivorous lunar activities
mr. bringsly i 'm sorry
i have absolutely no idea what to say to you
you 've left my wife a widow and my children fatherless
and i understand that i am to walk the earth one of the living dead until the wolf 's bloodline is severed and the curse lifted
that 's easy for you to say you 're already dead
no david
harry and i and everyone you murder are not dead
the undead
why are you doing this to me
all right laugh then
i sha n't tell it
oh come on tell us
no
you 've had your chance
oh all right
there was this airplane over the atlantic on its way to new york
it was full of men from the united nations
that 's very funny that is
no one brought them here
no one wanted them here
you could have told them
mr. kessler
wake up please
i was having a nightmare
now go back to sleep so you 'll be fresh for dr. hirsch in the morning
what time is it
it 's nearly eight
i 'm off duty shortly then i 'm off to the films with alex
alex
miss price the other nurse that attended you
what are you going to see
an american film about the mafia called see you next wednesday and i want to see it badly so you give me no problems and go to sleep
do you have bad dreams too
some everyone does
yes but does everyone kill bambi
bambi
hello david
i am dr. hirsch and this is a countryman of yours mr. collins
where am i
you 're in a hospital in london
london
where 's jack
i had a strange dream
i should think so after your recent traumatic experiences
the guy i was with
is he all right
how did i get to london
now david i want you to prepare yourself your friend is dead
miss price
miss price please
get your fucking hands off me
what the hell is going on here
how long have i been here
you 've been unconscious since you were brought in two weeks ago
two weeks
you 've suffered some rather severe cuts and bruises lost a bit of blood but nothing too serious black and blue for a while
you 'll have some dueling scars to boast of
that lunatic must have been a very fierce fellow
they say a mad man has the strength of ten
lunatic
now we 've just given you a pretty strong sedative so try to get some rest now
miss price will see to your needs
rest now
did you get a good look at the man who attacked you
i 've told you it was n't a man
it was an animal
a big wolf or something
a rabid dog
yes
look dr. hirsch i know i 've been traumatized but jack was torn apart
i saw him
a man ca n't do that to someone with his bare hands
you 'd be surprised what horrors a man is capable of
did you see jack
no
in fact your wounds were cleaned and dressed before you arrived here
did you talk to the police in east proctor
did the cops go to the slaughtered lamb
i really do n't know
then why the hell are you so quick to disbelieve me
you yourself said it must have taken incredible strength to tear apart a person like that
david please
the police are satisfied
i 'm certain that if a monster were out roaming northern england we 'd have seen it on the telly
you really think i 'm crazy do n't you
believe me
the hound of the baskervilles was an invention of sir arthur conan doyle 's
and if you 'd read the bloody book you 'd find that holmes discovered your house of hell a fraud a fake
dr. hirsch
i 'd rather not be by myself
of course not david
i 'll fetch in young miss price
are you cold
yes
good
jack
david
you 're not having a good time are you
oh i do n't know
i mean look around
is n't this a fun place
well i like it here
i 'm sorry
northern england first italy later
right
do you think she 'll meet me in rome
i think debbie klein is a mediocre person with a good body
debbie is not mediocre and she has one of the great bodies of all time
she 's a jerk
you 're talking about the woman i love
i 'm talking about a girl you want to fuck so give me a break
well anyway do you think she 'll be there
i do n't know
rendezvous in rome starring jack goodman and debbie klein
the love affair that shocked europe
see torrid lovemaking at its most explicit
see jack and debbie expose their lust in the sacred halls of the vatican
never has the screen dared
if you do n't stop i 'm going to kill you
i have to make love to her
it 's very simple
she has no choice really
it just fascinates me that you can spend so much energy on someone so dull
it is impossible for a body like that to be dull
we 've known debbie what since the eighth grade
how many years of foreplay is that
she says she likes me too much
the slaughtered lamb
of course the slaughtered lamb
why else would they have a severed fox head on a spear as their symbol
that 's a wolf 's head
of course the slaughtered lamb
why else would they have a severed wolf 's head on a spear as their symbol
that 's not a spear
it 's a pike
a severed wolf 's head on a pike as their symbol
david before we go in there i want you to know that no matter what happens to us it 's your fault
i assume full responsibility
okay
shall we
hello
nice to see you
ask them what the candles are for
you ask them
listen that 's a pentangle a five- pointed star
it 's used in witchcraft
lon chaney jr. and universal studios maintain it 's the mark of the wolf man
i see
you want me to ask these people if they 're burning candles to ward off monsters
right
wrong
go on ask them
you ask them
jack we 'd better go
what do you mean
i 'm starving
come on jack shall we go
apparently so
what the hell was that all about
i do n't know
let 's see if there 's an inn or something up the road
beware the moon
come on i 'm freezing
that was weird
i guess leaving was the best idea
i do n't know
now that we 're out here and it 's three degrees i 'm not so sure i would n't rather face a blood thirsty mob
well not quite a blood thirsty mob
what do you think was wrong
i have no idea
maybe that pentangle was for something supernatural
i see and they were too embarrassed to talk about it because they felt so silly
say david
i 'm well aware of how pleasant the weather is in rome at the present time thank you
i vote we go back to the slaughtered lamb
yeah
shit
david what is that
i do n't know
come on
come on where
anywhere
i think we should just keep moving
it 's moving
it 's circling us
what 's the plan
plan
let 's just keep walking
it 's in front of us
do you think it 's a dog
oh shit
what is that
a sheep dog or something
turn slowly and let 's walk away
nice doggie
good boy
walk away jack
walking away yes sir
here we are walking away
see anything
no
you really scared me you shithead
are you going to help me up
nice to see you
get the fuck out of here jack
thanks a lot
this is too much
i ca n't handle this
i 'm aware that i do n't look so great but i thought you 'd be glad to see me
david
you 're hurting my feelings
hurting your feelings
has it occurred to you that it may be unsettling to have you rise from your grave to visit me
listen to me i 'm talking to a hamburger
i 'm sorry to be upsetting you david but i had to come
are n't you supposed to be buried in new york someplace
yeah
your parents came to my funeral
i was surprised at how many people came
why should you be surprised
you were a very well liked person
debbie klein cried a lot
i ca n't stand it
so you know what she does
she 's so grief stricken she runs to find solace in rudy levine 's bed
rudy levine the shmuck
life mocks me even in death
i 'm going completely crazy
david
what
david now i know this may be hard for you but i have to warn you
warn me
will you get out of here you meat loaf
i 'm a grisly sight it 's true but i love you and that 's why i 'm here
you 've got to know
if you love me so much jack you 'll realize how disconcerting it is to share one 's breakfast with the living dead
we were attacked by a werewolf
i 'm not listening
on the moors we were attacked by a lycanthrope a werewolf
shut up you zombie
i was murdered an unnatural death and now i walk the earth in limbo until the werewolf 's curse is lifted
what 's wrong with you
shut up
the wolf 's bloodline must be severed
the last remaining werewolf must be destroyed
will you be quiet
it 's you david
what
you survived and now you shall continue the curse
what are you talking about
i wo n't accept this
get out
god damit
remember what that guy at the slaughtered lamb said
beware the moon
stop it jack
beware the moon
the full moon david
you 've got two days
jack please go away
please go away
you 'll stalk the streets of london a creature of the night
you 're talking like boris karloff
it 's movie dialogue
david please believe me
you will kill people david
you 've got to stop the bloodshed before it begins
nurse
listen to me
take your own life david
it 's our only chance
nurse
the supernatural
the powers of darkness
it 's all true
take your own life
suicide david
join me
nurse
oh god
alex
it 's cold david and i 'm so alone
the undead surround me
have you ever talked to a corpse
it 's boring
i 'm lonely
kill yourself david before you kill others
you 're not real
do n't be an asshole david
come here
what are you doing here
i wanted to see you
okay you 've seen me
now go away
david i 'm sorry i upset you yesterday but you must understand what is going on
i understand all right
you 're one of the undead and i 'm a werewolf
yes
get out of here jack
david tomorrow night is the full moon
you 'll change you 'll become
a monster
i know i know
you must take your own life now david before it 's too late
jack are you really dead
what do you think
i think i 've lost my mind
i think you 're not real
i think i 'm asleep and you 're a part of another bad dream
you must believe me
what jack
that tomorrow night beneath the full moon i 'll sprout hair and fangs and eat people
bullshit
the canines will be real
you 'll taste real blood
god damit david please believe me
you 'll kill and make others like me
i 'm not having a nice time david
do n't allow this to happen again
you must take your own life
i will not accept this
now go away
hi jack
hi david
because this must be stopped
how shall i do it
i could hang myself
if you did it wrong it would be painful
you 'd choke to death
dr. hirsch
come in come in
please sit
some tea
no thank you doctor
well then what can i do for scotland yard
you were saying
has david kessler anything to say concerning the attack on the moors
why do n't we ask him
the forensic lads seem to feel that some sort of animal was involved that 's true but i hardly think
regardless of what you think lieutenant the fact remains that david is missing and that we must find him
what can we do to assist you
stay here
if we need you we 'll know where to reach you
yes
lt
villiers and sgt
mcmanus are here to see you doctor
send them in
what 's that
oh that 's been there for two hundred years
we were going to paint it out but it 's traditional so we left it
i see
you 've heard nothing about the incident
do you have any hot soup
no
hot chocolate
we 've got spirits and beer
if it 's something hot you want you can have tea
then you have some hot tea
no
oh
but i can heat some up for you if you 'd like
remember the alamo
i beg your pardon
no thank you
i 'd like some tea please
sorry
has mr. kessler said anything regarding the attack on the moors
he may have a point lieutenant
two strong boys would be able to defend themselves against one man
sgt
mcmanus are you suggesting that david and jack were in fact attacked by some animal and that the officialdom of east proctor has conspired to keep it a secret
we have an autopsy report on the murderer who was shot in the act by the local police
we have two witnesses to the crime
you 'll forgive me mr. kessler if i consider your testimony as coming from someone who has gone through a terrible shock
lieutenant the boy seems pretty lucid to me and
and what sergeant
i do n't rightly know sir
that is precisely my point
david as far as we are concerned the matter is closed
we wo n't trouble you any further
good day
i can not accept a connection between david kessler and last night 's murders
we will find him however
i can assure you of that
we 'll find him not to worry
tom i never had trouble getting credit from you before
when i was flat broke you gave me all the money i wanted
now i come to you with a swell deal and the greatest
i 'll tell you why
i do n't like the crowd you 're mixed up with
personally you can have all the credit you want
but for that deal not a cent
but listen tom i
what 's the idea of turning her down
it sounds like a perfectly safe investment
she 's a widow
i do n't like taking mortgages from widows
why not
if she ca n't pay i 'll have to foreclose wo n't i
yes sure
yeah sure
oscar what 's the matter
i was the first one to see it
i was coming down the stairs and there was the watchman lying dead at my feet
no kidding
no kidding
when i saw it you could'a knocked me over with a pin
where 's matt
matt
yeah
he 'll have a tough time thinking up a wise crack for this one
the detectives got matt up there in sampson 's office
he has
yeah
say matt i 'll have to have some money for those manville payrolls
how much
about twenty four thousand
it was more than that last week
yeah
here 's twenty five thousand
say do me a favor will you charlie
yeah
let me have ten bucks
ten bucks
say if i had ten bucks i 'd quit
charlie
yeah
i 'll pay it back to you saturday on the level i will
give a guy a break will you
i 've got to get it back in my account
if helen ever finds out that i
baby i ca n't give you anything but love
whose death
it 'll be yours if you do n't kick in with that ten bucks
say pal did you ever hear of a depression
aw nerts
and listen wise guy i 'm setting friend time clock for exactly nine o'clock so no squawks out of you guys in the morning
say do n't annoy me
i got troubles of my own
mr. dickson in yet
not yet mr. clark
when he comes in tell him we 're waiting for him in the board room
yes sir
and tell him not to delay
yes sir
personally i think you 're getting panic stricken about nothing
dickson 's all right
oh is he
we carry more unsecured paper than any other institution in the city
we 're fools to tolerate it
do n't make me laugh schultz
dickson does n't have to go
but he must agree to this merger with new york trust
what good will that do
what good will that do
why it will take control away from him
we 'll put somebody else in charge call in all doubtful loans and be on safe ground again
that 's what good it will do
how are you protecting your depositors
by making a lot of idiotic loans
take it easy clark
you know dickson as well as we do
he 'll shut the doors before he gives up control
all right let him
i 'm sick and tired of hearing about him
if he wants to run the bank let him do it
i do n't want any part of it
say you know i found out something yesterday about hitting a golf ball
you 've got to hit with the left hand and from the inside out it 's the only way you can hit anything
i think mr. dickson we would like to have a little of your very valuable time here at the bank this morning if you do n't mind
oh you would eh
all right
if it 's more important than golf go ahead
what 's on your mind
what 's the matter with my policy
how many losses has this bank taken in the last twenty five years
i 'll tell you
not a single one
what 's wrong with that kind of banking
just pure luck
i 'm running this bank my way
get that clear
gentlemen you notice mr. dickson refuses to consider our wishes
he refuses an offer to merge with the new york trust the only thing that will put this bank on safe ground
he insists upon running a bank on so flimsy a thing as
as faith
yes
you said it clark
that 's the only thing that means anything to me
we want to talk to you
what about
we 'll discuss that in the board room
we 'll be forced to shut the doors
i 've worked twenty five years night and day to keep this bank alive
you 've all made money out of it
are you willing to help
what do you mean help
i know that among you you have at least a million dollars in various banks throughout the city
get that money over here and i 'll stop this run within five minutes
that sounds very simple dickson but why should we jeopardize our personal fortunes
i have everything i own in it
it 's your bank as well as mine is n't it
the depositors you were protecting were the first ones to pounce on you
you thought they were your friends
why do n't you go out there now and try and get some help from them
aw they 've gone crazy
you ca n't reason with a mob
no
you ca n't reason with anyone else when you 're in a jam
we pleaded with you to keep liquid but you would n't listen to us
you preached to us about faith and a lot of other rubbish
now you want our help
you want us to throw a lot of cash into a bank that you 've wrecked
all right
there 's one way you can get it
give us an option on your stock and resign as president
so that 's it eh
you 've waited a long time for this chance have n't you
well i 'm not going to resign now or ever
say you ca n't do that
i ca n't
you just wait and see
if that run does n't stop within the next hour i 'll shut the doors
you know what that means
the bank examiner will step in tomorrow
you 'll be forced to liquidate
i 'll insist upon it
the depositors will be paid one hundred cents on the dollar
what 's left you gentlemen can have
but i 'll guarantee there wo n't be enough to pay your next month 's garage bill
dickson i 'd like to talk to you about the bank
the bank
all right
do anything you want with it
come out here you pawnbrokers take a look at this
we 've been waiting fifteen minutes
you know what you can do with that
come on take a look at this
you 'll see a demonstration of faith that 's worth more than all the collateral in the world
i hope you do n't mind me asking you a few questions mr. cluett
of course yes
just what would you like to know inspector
where were you at twelve o'clock last night
that 's very simple
i was home
stand back inspector or i 'll shoot
drop that gun
all right jack all right
do n't be a fool cluett
this is only going to make it worse for you
stand back inspector
let me out of here or i 'll shoot you
what were you doing at finlay 's this morning
they took my keys yesterday
i went there to get them back
i was crazy i tell you mr. dickson
i did n't know what i was doing
i wandered around in a daze
all i could think of was that they were going to kill me
you 'll stand by me wo n't you mr. dickson
you wo n't go back on me now will you
i 'll die if they send me to prison
do n't forget there 's a dead watchman downstairs
i did n't kill him
i had nothing to do with that i tell you
i was home in my apartment last night i can prove it
claims he was there with a married woman
does n't want to mention her name
he wo n't believe it mr. dickson
but it 's the truth honest it is
i was in my apartment last night ask your wife she
confessed
cluett in heaven 's name what got into you
i do n't know
it 's all been like a crazy nightmare mr. dickson
what happened
you 're not a thief
how 'd you get mixed up with these kind of people
gambling i owed them a lot of money
last week i lost over fifty thousand dollars
fifty thousand dollars
but i did n't kill that man last night
honest i did n't mr. dickson
what was my wife doing in your apartment last night
nothing nothing mr. dickson
do n't pay any attention to me
i do n't know what i 'm saying
you just mentioned her name
what was she doing there
what was she doing in your apartment
she just came up for a drink
just for a few minutes
she was n't to blame mr. dickson
it was n't her fault
honest it was n't
i begged her to come up
she did n't
get out get out
you know what we do to welchers cluett do n't you
i know i know dude
oh i must have been crazy
i lost my head completely
that 's your funeral
we 've got fifty thousand dollars comin to us
i have n't got it
what do you mean
all you got ta do is fix a few things for us and we 'll do the rest see
dude there 's not any chance of my becoming involved in this is there
you
no you 'll be all right so long as you establish an alibi for tonight
know but
be sure you 're with somebody responsible in case any questions are asked
understand
but dude listen could n't we make this some other time
listen buddy you 're getting by pretty easy
quit squawking
this wo n't do
not during business hours
why i needed a
what is the matter with you
you 're trembling
am i
why i i do n't know any reason why i should be unless of course it 's you
me
being alone with you has always done this to me
you know that
for a celebrated bounder that is an awful admission
besides i never knew that any female could do this to you
well you can
you always could
liar
you 're just suffering from lack of sleep
here here here now
do n't you go back to work on me too
i 'm getting tired of this
besides it 's beginning to affect your looks
what is
running around
not your work
you 'd better start reforming cyril
if i thought you were the slightest bit interested i would
not bad not bad at all
do you know something
i 've always been curious about your line
line
whatever it is that makes you such a riot with women
come on cyril try a little bit of it out on me
i have n't had any first class blarney thrown at me since the day i was married
but you see it is n't blarney where you 're concerned
now let me see what comes next
oh yes i know what are you doing tonight phyllis
does n't that come next
yes yes it does
what are you doing tonight phyllis
see we 're getting along famously
oh
oh no
i think i 've done enough experimenting for one day
congratulations cyril
you 've convinced me that you 're a philanderer of the very first order
i shall recommend you highly
please please do n't laugh at me phyllis
i must see you tonight
what 's this
my apartment
i knew i could n't trust you
you told me you were taking me home
come on up for just a few minutes
we 'll have just one drink then we 'll go
no
i know the answer to that one
i think you 'd better take me home
what 's the matter
afraid papa will spank
no
no i 'm afraid papa is n't that much interested
he 's too busy rushing off to philadelphia to make stuffy old speeches at stuffy old bankers meetings
too busy closing big important deals i think i will have a drink
good for you
come on
you know there ought to be a congressional medal for men like you
america 's comfort to misunderstood wives
i never thought i would find myself in that class
oh you 're not so badly off
there 's something much worse than being a misunderstood wife
what is that mr. bones?[7
a misunderstood bachelor
and now fair woman i have you in my power
i 'm not afraid of you
you have n't got a moustache
i 'll grow a moustache by the time you get out of here
why matt
what are you doing here
are the payrolls ready for tomorrow
yes sir
let me see your cash book will you
now
yes now
the butler said i could stay
i told him it was important
oh yeah
well i thought i 'd like to have a little talk with you
i 'm listening
it 's funny now that i 'm here i do n't know just how to go about it
you see i kind of expected to find you here alone
anything you have to say to me you can say in the morning
oh no mr. cluett if it 's all the same to you i 'd rather not wait
it 's about you and mrs. dickson
good morning mr. dickson
john how 's your wife this morning
much better this morning thank you
got a handkerchief
excuse me
wait a minute
how do you feel this morning
i 'm feeling fine this morning
that makes it unanimous
i feel all right too
thank you
shall we let the people come in
of course let them in
you 're late now
good morning mr. dickson
my wife is much better this morning
well that 's too bad
mine 's all right too
well look who 's here
hello dear
hello darling
if this is n't a red letter day for tom dickson
first i trample on the board of directors then i promote matt here to assistant cashier and now to complete the day i have a visit from my sweet and lovely and gorgeous wife
what a man what a man
it 's amazing that your sweet lovely gorgeous wife can ever get to see you
oooh
that has the earmarks
what 's the matter dear
what have i done now
nothing
tom i thought you were going out with me tonight
oh i did have a date with you tonight did n't i
yes
i 'm terribly sorry
i 'd forgotten all about you
i 'm so sorry dear
now tom you simply can not go to philadelphia tonight
that 's all there is to it
but i have to go dear
it 's a very important banker 's meeting
i do n't care whether it 's important or not
you said you were going out with me and if you had n't promised so faithfully i would n't have gone and planned the whole thing
listen it is n't so terribly important
we can go to the theatre any time
the theatre
that 's what it was you planned was n't it
yes of course
you can take some of the girls
you can take mildred or gwynn
the girls
i do n't suppose it ever occurred to you that i might go out and find myself an attractive young man
listen dear
i want to ask you something
i know it 's a silly thing for me to ask you but
i want you to tell me the truth
where were you last night
last night
er why uh last night
listen dear
now tell me the truth about this
were you in cluett 's apartment
in cluett 's apartment
well dear you see i
i
good morning
helen you 're becoming more beautiful every day
what are we going to do about it
i do n't know
guess we 'll just have to sacrifice the bank
when are you and matt going to get married
why well i
ummm
stalling eh
anything new
why the directors are waiting for you in the board room
directors eh
long faces
longer
i have n't got any new stories for them this morning either
helen tell matt i want to see him
yes sir
oh mr. dickson they 're going to arrest matt
they think he did it
where is he now
in mr. sampson 's office
now do n't you worry about it
come on in here helen
bring your book
i want some numbers to try to get some action
get parker at the union leeds the exchange
winslow and old man harris at the home mortgage
snap into it helen
just as quick as you can
yes sir
you want the rest of those numbers mr. dickson
numbers
no never mind
good morning helen
good morning
say i know what 's the matter with you
matt
yes
mr. sampson
all right
send him in
helen
yes
get mrs. dickson on the phone
good morning mrs. pembroke
good morning mr. dickson
got my letter
yes thank you
hello helen
mr. dickson
ah mrs. pembroke
i spoke to mr. schaffer at the guaranty
he 's going to take care of that mortgage for you
but mr. dickson i thought you were going to take care of the mortgage
i only want ten thousand
the property is worth sixty
mr. schaffer will take good care of you
he 'll give you fifteen maybe twenty
wait a minute
where 's your uniform
i have n't any
you have n't got a uniform
no sir
my goodness you ought to have a uniform
how much does one cost
why i do n't know
you see sampson
tell him i sent you
you 've got to have a uniform
oh make that uniform blue
yes sir
well well well got your uniform eh
yes sir
looks good
how much did it cost
i do n't know
mr. sampson bought it for me
aw i 'm sorry mr. dickson
it 's just kind of sudden that 's all
sure i 'm excited
i think it 's great
only well you 've done so much for me already
i 'll never be able to thank you enough
aw go on forget it
you came through did n't you
that 's all i wanted
a lot of them did n't think you would
you do n't know how much satisfaction it 's been to me
it 's been swell
well when are you and helen going to get married
well i
i suppose you want me to fix that up for you too eh
i already told him i was home
there you are
wait a minute
wait a minute
matt do you realize you 're up against something
you 're being charged with murder
it 's serious son
now come on i know you did n't do it
but we 've got to make them believe it
come on tell the truth where were you last night
i ca n't tell you
no
i wo n't
you 're protecting somebody
no i 'm not mr. dickson
yes you are
you 're protecting somebody
now listen it does n't make any difference who it is
it ca n't be as important as this
now come on tell me
where were you last night
come on do n't be a fool
matt you trust me do n't you
we have n't got much time left mr. dickson
we 've got to do something quick or it 'll be too late
why would n't you tell me where you were last night
you 're not giving up are you mr. dickson
were you in cluett 's apartment
oh i can explain about that later
you 're losing your bank do n't you realize what that means
was mrs. dickson there
listen mr. dickson do n't let them lick you just because a couple of big shots turned you down
you 've got more friends than anybody in this town
little guys guys who would n't be in business if it were n't for you
all you 've got to do is
wait a minute
answer my question
was mrs. dickson there
well
uh
i
she was was n't she
how long has this been going on
do you know
aw i do n't know what you 're talking about
all i know is that you 're losing your bank and
all right
that 's all
please matt
i want you both to take the day off
go downtown and get a license and get married right away
but i have n't
i do n't want to hear any more about it
if you do n't get married i 'll fire both of you
helen while you 're downtown you might stop in and make reservations for the bridal suite on the berengaria sailing next week
gee thanks mr. dickson
what 's the matter
what 's going on here
this is ridiculous
you ca n't hold this boy on a vague suspicion
i 'm afraid i must mr. dickson
why pick on him
it 's an inside job
that 's a cinch
whoever did it had a pretty good picture of the layout
now brown here is in charge of the vaults is n't he
yes
all i know is the bank 's been robbed and a murder 's been committed
the way i see it brown here looks guilty
what are you talking about
he had no more to do with it than you did
maybe
but i 'm taking no chances
why this kid 's got a record
so have you
so have i. so 's everybody got a record
what difference does that make
you ca n't go around pinning crimes on people just because they
of course it 's true and he knows it
listen matt
if you do n't tell the truth i ca n't help you
where were you last night
you were right mr. dickson
brown did n't have anything to do with it
here 's your man
why you must be crazy
i 've known this man for years
he 's just confessed
he 's been mixed up with the toughest gangsters in town
my wife
what 's she got to do with you
no wonder he did n't want to mention her name
you 're lying
do n't worry mr. dickson
we 'll find out whether he 's telling the truth
i 'll have a man from headquarters check up on it right away
you do n't want to check up on anybody
i 'll do all the checking up
wait a minute
well sampson what is it
here 's the data on the clyde deal
good
i 'll take this along with me
tell clyde i 'll see him tomorrow
i 'm sick and tired of the delay
i 'm afraid he 's been stalling
that 's just exactly what he has been doing
this deal should have been closed weeks ago
tell him to keep tomorrow open
he says he ca n't get away in the daytime
how about his nights
he 's too busy running around
tell him to keep tomorrow night open come in and sign this thing or i 'll call this whole deal off
yes sir
the lobby 's half filled now
what are you talking about
look at them mr. dickson
they 're going crazy
did you get the case for the securities
yes sir
mine too
yes sir
but soon as our money runs out they 'll mob the place
the fools
if they only knew it they 're making things worse for themselves
somebody starts a silly rumor and they lose their heads
what 'll we do
i 'll talk to them
listen go back and tell the boys to stall as much as possible
tell 'em not to pay any attention to what i said
tell 'em to verify every signature
we ca n't keep open till four o'clock
we have n't cash enough to last an hour
do n't you think i know it
mr. dickson
mr. dickson
get all the big bills in the place
take them out and get them changed
get nothing but ones and fives
distribute them among the tellers
tell them to take their time
stall as much as possible
count and recount the money
yes sir
i hate to do this but i 've got to have time to dig up some help
i think i know where i can get some real cash
snap into it sampson
we will lick this thing yet
yes ma'am you can deposit your money here
is it safe
absolutely
it 's his life insurance money you know
quiet down please
take it easy folks
everything will be all right
but you said it would be safe
it 's his life insurance money
oh please i 'll go to the old ladies home if you do n't do something please
please lady
please be quiet
everything will be all right
open up here folks
all right folks please
how do you do mrs. dickson
is that busy husband of mine busy
he 's at a board meeting
board meeting
oh that means hours i suppose
i 'm afraid so
helen did you ever try competing with a bank
no
well take my word for it and do n't try it
it 's useless
if it were some other woman i could handle her but after all you ca n't scratch a bank 's eyes out now can you
hardly
oh well
i guess the only other thing for me to do is to go out and buy myself a few sticks of dynamite
when he comes out you tell him i 'll be back
he has n't gotten rid of me
all right
what did you do with it
with what
the ten dollars
oh ten dollars
yes
a friend of mine yeah really his mother was terribly sick and she was dying would you believe it
no
oh you think i 'm lying
yes
all right i 'm lying
do n't forget you called me a liar
oh matt
say i just heard the merger is n't going thru
is n't that grand
yeah swell
what happened
what did he say
did you get the job
yeah
what 's the matter matt
gee i thought you 'd be thrilled to death
come here
you know a few minutes ago i was in cluett 's office and mrs. dickson was there
well
well he was making love to her
oh matt you must be mistaken
i tell you i saw them
in cluett 's office
yes right in his office the rat
i 'd like to take a crack at that guy
what 's keeping you
oh charlie again
say matt you have n't done anything about what you saw today have you
who
cluett
no not yet
but i 'd like to take a crack at that stiff- necked horse dollar.[6
oh now do n't be silly
can you imagine that guy
he was kissing her
now you 've got me worried dear
promise me you wo n't butt in
okay honey but just the same i 'd like to take a crack at that
what 's he doing honey
is he getting any help
something 's happened
he is n't trying anymore
they must have turned him down
yes
he called some of the biggest people in town
sure they 'd turn him down
he ought to know that
i 'm going in there and talk to him
did you talk to him
yeah
i got an idea
come on let 's get to a telephone
dickson 's in a jam i tell you
the run 's getting worse
mr. williams
the big guys have got the screws on him
you 've got to come through for him mr. conway
he came through for you a hundred times
if his friends do n't help him who is going to help him
matt look
there 's mr. jones
did you say dude finlay
yes why
he was in the bank yesterday
he was here
he came to see mr. cluett
are you sure
yes sir
what did you find out mike
i 've been trailing the cashier like you told me
you 're right about that guy chief
there 's something screwy somewhere
never mind all that
what did you find out
he left here about an hour ago and went down to dude finlay 's joint
dude finlay
yes sir
do you know this young man mrs. halligan
sure i do
he has the best room in me house
the one with the fancy wallpaper
for the rheumatism you know
what time was it mrs. halligan
it was late i know
the dooley sisters was already in
they work at a show you know
what time was it
huh
what time did matt brown get in
now let me see a half hour after the dooley sisters and the dooley sisters never get home until after
i do n't care about the dooley sisters what time did he get in
that 's just what i 'm trying to tell you sir
it was a half hour after the dooley sisters
was it twelve o'clock
you turned off the burglar alarm you set the time clock came back at twelve and emptied the boxes did n't you
was n't anywhere near this place
sit down
when the watchman surprised you you shot him what 'd you do with the gun
i did n't do it
i have n't got a gun
you used to carry a gun did n't you
then who changed it
i do n't know
so you were home last night
yes
what time did you get in
well about uh eleven o'clock
eleven o'clock eh
are you sure it was that
yes
but i was n't here mr. dickson
honest i was n't
then where were you
you 're carrying too much money on you hank
you better turn some in tonight
okay matt
how are you fixed
i 'm okay matt
you 've got enough
that mug reminds me of a guy with his second dollar
yeah what did he do with his first one
bought himself a pocketbook
everybody in
i guess so
where 's charlie
charlie 's upstairs as sore as a pup
he 's out fourteen cents and he ca n't find it
i think i may just go on to the reservation
tom i 'm this close to coming with you
i could n't lose him
jim younger i told you--
this is healing
sometimes a wound will kill
now you tell us
gatling
they 've got a gatling
dammit this stopped being fun about two years ago
he 's smiling
never a good thing
never thought that pissant town would look so pretty
anywhere nobody 's shooting at me is pretty
your ma would n't let us leave until we ate something
that was two hours ago
here 's liberty 's favorite son
i 'll never forget what you did cousin
zee i 'm pleased you came
uhh yeah it does
you stay out of this bob
no jimmy has a point
the younger james gang could be confusing
how
say we bust into a bank
we yell we 're the younger james gang
people are gon na be thinking the younger james gang
is there an older james gang
how come we never heard of the older james gang
so people are trying to figure that out instead of raising their arms
we got a problem here brother
frankly yes
i 'm feeling a little left out
that 's what the newspapers say
were n't for jesse james this gang would n't be able to find a goat 's ass with a stick
what
this is the best score yet
it 's still taking too long
the people used to snap to
that was because of
the reputation the gang had
as long as people think jesse 's still riding we will never get the respect we deserve
cole we 're outlaws
not exactly the most respectable job if you know what i mean
leave me alone bob
how 'd they --
what have you done
i ai n't done --
what have you done
bob
i did n't
swear
i swear --
swear on jimmy 's grave
i 'm sorry cole
you 're just upset about jesse
we all are
yesterday
well somebody better go tell the damn yankees
corn gon na shoot at me
nope
then i love it
jesus mercy that 's charlie higgins dave laller
... will perry
cole i want to get to the farm make sure little jim and the girls are okay
stop by our spread after that tell our ma we 're all right
we 'll go to doc mimms
they came up made the same offer they made you folks
our little brother jim tried to chase 'em off one of those detectives hit him in the head knocked him out
cole lost his temper
oh no
he just lost his temper a little
damn
they said because the detectives were working for the department of the interior --
the army can hang him
tomorrow
home
we go home
we ride like hell to get there and we kill anything or anyone that comes between us and our homes
and when we get there we stay there and god help any fool who tries to get me to leave my farm again
best damn plan i heard all war
how many of them did he kill
two
all right settle down
all this money ai n't ours
well no jesse it was the bank 's
that 's why we had to go to all that trouble of stealing it
you explain it to him
we oughta take some of this give it to our neighbors in liberty
lot of people hurting up there
the outlaws calling themselves the james younger gang shot their way out of town wounding the sherriff and three other townsfolk
hey
bank officials estimate the loss at fifty thousand dollars
okay folks i think we know how this is going to go
one false move and i 'll blow your heads off
beg pardon
you heard me jesse
you know how crazy i get
this is about the wanted
posters is n't it
yes
i am obviously not standing out in people 's minds at the robberies
the things a fella has to do to get a little respect around here
you are a fine figure of a man
listen jesse we 've got a problem
it 's cole
he 's been full of vinegar lately
he 's planning a job
what
listen he 's my brother and i do n't want to start trouble
tell me
what
you ya barrel of pork lard
here piggy piggy
what you sayin boy
i think i recognize you
how
i think i saw you leavin by the front door just as i was coming in the back
ride with me cousin
i could use the walk
suit yourself
we 'll have some horses waiting for you at the road
let 's ride rangers
where you boys going
there 's yankees back there
lot 's of 'em
home boys
back to our farms
planting corn
harvesting corn
year after year
hands off your hip cole
you 're not scared are you
pick your fights cousin
you taught me that
not now
what is wrong with you
in case we have to kill these sonofabitches i do n't want them to see us coming
you ever notice zerelda 's eyes
she got two of them
she had a moustache
she was european
all right calm down
i 'll agree sadie was a woman --
thanks for the help
after all you did on our farm
you miss it do n't you jesse
the war
what are you crazy
there are things i miss about it
it was exciting
but it was a whole lot of killing
why should we miss that
i 'll pick the first job
i mean
i know a girl down at the bank
see if she ca n't get a list of towns where the railroad keeps its money
perfect cole
let 's ride
the james younger gang
sorry
do n't let it happen again
i got seven thousand
i got three
see frank 's being smart about this
just because he reads all those books and knows all those big words does n't make him smart
it 's not a bank
it 's better
it 's a construction depot
they 'll have the strongbox and some ammo and explosives for us to take
that way we can take on a bigger job
the fidelity bank and trust was robbed on tuesday by a gang of twenty heavily armed men
twenty
jesse we got to have a word
sure cousin
all the posters and newspapers are calling this bunch the james younger gang
yep
why are n't we the younger james gang
i mean there 's three younger brothers and only two james brothers here
this is your fault for hogging all the publicity
hold on hold on we all know bob is an important part of the gang
beautiful
now the one time one of us comes up with an idea --
a bad idea
i got us through the war all right
and almost got hanged in peacetime
that 's it
i 'm the better soldier jesse
and i 'm the better outlaw
still smells fishy
then let me run the show general lee
fine
we hit this bank
you 'll be smiling once you 've got all that money to spend cousin
cole younger 's going to make everybody rich
dammit
a trap
okay you 're gon na rest here
clell tom go get doc mimms in liberty
bob rip up some bandages
pass me some whisky
we 'll make them pay for this
i 'm out
what
we follow you for a year and now that our blood 's been spilled you 're gon na quit
who 's next
you
me
bob
where 'd you get all these riders
we did n't
zerelda did
turns out your wife makes a hell of an outlaw
some indian tracker you turned out to be tom
you pay me to find you bluecoats
there they are
wait'll we get back to missouri start telling those gals about how little jesse james charged the whole union army by himself
you ride like a comanche
tom why do n't you stop at our spread before you head on out to the reservation
figure we might have some work for you if you want
hmm
go back to the reservation and get drunk in a dirt shack or work for you
well
i 'm thinking
cannon or gatling
both would be nice
soon as i hit one the other'll know and beat us up
what the --
must be a garrison in town
we 're in occupied territory boys
i think one of 'em 's glass
which one right or left
the brown one
oh lord the dance hall girl at bunty 's
sadie was not a man
hey
we decide something that 's it
we 're in this for the long haul and this idea of me and jesse 's will help give us more places to hide out without worrying about some farmer with a shotgun sneakin up on us in our sleep
we 've got to think --
strategically
-- exactly
because this is a war
jesse
oh you 're in charge
we ai n't partners any more jesse
you tell cole younger where and when to ride
cole he did n't mean that
another dozen out back
they gon na rush us
they 're just insurance in case we run
the safe
now
of course
uh sir
what
where is jesse james
this here is the younger gang
open the damn safe
all right all right
jesse james never yelled at folk
you um big lawman
yeah injun
what do you want
great chief of st. louis send me
the district marshall
of st. louis
ho yah
him say tell big lawman in carville that badman jesse james riding toward rising sun above great river near eagle rock
east
east above the river heading for the eagle pass
ho yah
go ahead to the saloon
but do n't get too drunk
me get heap firewater --
where the hell were you
i had you covered
from back there
shit
-- rode right into them screaming like a banshee
my little web did that
pff
he jumped his horse clear over our heads killed a dozen union soldiers before they knew what hit them
web died fighting
died a hero
boys
go home doc
they ai n't gon na hang no more liberty boys
what do you say sir
go on
you 're pretty much all healed up
you know you 're welcome any time
yesss but i was thinking i could come by and then take zee out
some place near
with other folk
near
here
but out
it 's fine by me jesse
daddy do n't start with this again
zerelda it 's no coincidence
the railroad men come through offering to buy up land
nobody sells
then they start hanging men who own farms for treason
he 's going to be fine right daddy
the bullet came out clean but he lost a whole lot of blood
praying would n't hurt
every time i put my head up to hit that gatling they try to shoot it off
so we got a plan
distracting enough for you
pff
they hardly even noticed you
so you 're saying i could have done more to attract their attention
mm hmm
such as
you could have worn one of those big floppy woman 's easter sunday hats
that would have made an impression
i figure
see that 's your problem frank
by the time you finish figuring out stuff i 'm already finished doing it
no jesse your problem is you 're always doing stuff before i 'm finished figuring it out
web 's dead
i reckoned
hell of a war
i 'm sure it seemed like a good idea at the time
hello liberty missoura
all this time in the saddle
we get to the farm i 'm going to shoot this damn horse just on principle
looks like web mimms was n't the only casualty this town 's got
we better go to doc 's see what 's going on here
frank do n't you have something to say
you 're doing just fine
zee we got to talk to you and your father
whyyyy
he took down the gatling gun and the cannon all by himself
saved all our lives doc
none of the liberty boys would have come home if not for web mimms doc
god 's honest truth
all we thought about was coming home
i swore i 'd kill anybody who tried to get me off my farm again
if i have to go to war with the railroad to stay fine by me
think about this
if we just come up with a story and stick to it we should be all right
what kind of story are they going to believe
she 's still talking to jesus
what worries me is that jesus is talking back
-- if you stop saying things about my zee
your zee
hmm
from women 's eyes this doctrine i derive they sparkle still the right promethean fire they are the books the arts the academes that show contain and nourish all the world
you know him
heard of him
i went up to the courthouse and looked at the right of way documents for the rail bed
the railroad does n't even need our land they 're just taking the land on both sides for as far as they can
damn
all that reading paid off
you ready to stop loafing around with this young lady and get back to farming
what do you think
would you get in the carriage
until ma has you home so she can fuss over you herself she 's gon na make me miserable
you 're looking a bit more spry now that somebody --
shut up
uh doc i was wondering if uh this evening i could come by
pinkertons
it 's the railroad
ma
... we could move on
rebuild
make a decent life someplace else
do n't care
did n't think you would
i 'm going to go make the coffin
make a thousand of 'em
still wo n't be enough by the time i 'm through
and it 's guarded by pinkerton detectives
and i do so want to shoot some pinkerton detectives
i do n't think it 's counterfeit
do you mind if i take a look at all your real bills to compare
it 's the scientific method
it 's all the rage
gents we are in the middle of something here
bob 's upset
the posters
pardon the delay folks but we had to get mad bob younger under control
bob here'll kill a man for sneezing and he 's the best shot in the gang
this has been a good year
jesse we 're outlaws
and we 're good at it
it got to you did n't it
all the killing in the war
you need it now
you 've killed your fair share of men
if i could go back to farming --
that 's a lie
you could 've bought a dozen farms with the money we 've stolen
i ca n't quit and leave you alone
i ca n't quit until you quit
ma would 've wanted it that way
we 're doing this for ma
maybe it started out that way
but now
what do you want me to say frank
i was killing men when i was fifteen
i like getting shot at
i like riding out of town with a posse at my back
this is a helluva better life than farming
a better life than the one you could have had with zee
we 're drunk
oh yeah
just do me a favor
think about what this is costing everybody
not just the railroad
you taking sides against me now frank
no i --
they 're all pinned down
ca n't even get to the door
got any ideas little brother
y'know uncle frank
yeah jimmy
... every time you tell that story you stop there
that 's not how it ended
i was five when my dad got shot
i know
but that 's how it should have ended
your dad and mom riding off into a new life growing old together happy
allow a man his version of the past
when you get to be my age you 've got enough painful memories you 're allowed to soften a few of the edges up
sounds like he was a hell of a man
that he was
they 're making him a hero now
saved a lot of folk from the railroad
but he killed a lot of men too
ca n't argue that
so what was he
i think
he was just a real interestin fella to have around
uncle frank
yeah jimmy
how much of that story is true
everything but the boring parts
did you kill yankees
a fair number ma
say your prayers
ma i 'm glad to see you being nice to our injun friend
he 's a good christian and he killed yankees
jesus told me that made him an all right boy
easterners
we 're just fine thank you sir
the lord says we can bury 'em out back in the orchard nobody'll ever find them
somebody 's in a vengeful smiting mood today
ma
please
boys
zerelda
little zee mimms
you were little jesse james when you left
but you got big
but still died
if there 's anything we can do for you dr. mimms
we want to help
jesse are you awake
mmmm
jesse is that your hand
nuh huh
you should n't be up
i 've been on my back two weeks
i 'm sick of it
you 're sick of my company
no
i mean of course not
no
teasing you is completely unfair
what you do to me is unfair
the teasing i mean
i should n't tease a hero
what
everybody in the county knows it was you who rescued cole
we 're all so proud of you jesse
and not a single farm 's been sold to the railroad since
you 're everybody 's hero
i was n't the only one risking my neck that day
so you 're saying i should leave you alone and go spend time with jimmy younger
unfair
you are completely unfair
i used to come to this tree when i was a kid and imagine what my life would be like when i got older
you did n't want to farm
i was thinking more along the lines of being a river pirate
a river pirate
arr
hand over your jewels missy
thank god you grew out of that
you did grow out of that did n't you
mostly
it would be an all right life for a bachelor
you planning on being a bachelor your whole life jesse james
not if i find the right girl
and what 's this right girl like
smart
funny
bossy
always makes me think she 's two steps ahead of me
and big buck teeth
where will you find such a girl
honestly you 'd do if only you had the buck teeth
ahem
from this doctrine
no ah
from women 's eyes this doctrine i derive they sparkle still like
shiny
sparkling rocks
sparkling rocks
little ones
is this one of frank 's shakespeare poems you 're trying to quote
yep
were you planning on kissing me when you finished quoting
i 've been planning on kissin you for a very long time
i am so sorry jesse
frank and me have to go away for a while
i do n't understand
she 's the most wonderful woman in the world
ca n't get her out of my mind
that 's
wonderful
it 's just
i thought
she 's beautiful
smart
and has the biggest
buck teeth in all of missouri
i would never have imagined us in a place like this
that 's why i picked it
we can start a whole new life down here
are you going to be happy here mr. james
without all that excitement
i 've got you
you keep me busy
i figure we 'll get over to the hotel
get checked in cleaned up
then i 'd like to do something i 've been thinking about for a long time
now wait a minute
there are certain things that have to wait until after the wedding
hmm
hmm what
but the life of the james gang was n't all robbing and shooting and killing for these young missouri bucks had a taste for the ladies
especially the handsome and charismatic jesse james
i beg your pardon
blazing guns of the west
true stories of jesse james
only a dime in the hotel lobby
let me see that
oh i 'm not finished
when he sauntered into a saloon his spurs jangling and his pockets full of gold the ladies flocked around him like flies to a candied apple
as i said
hmm
now sweetie y' all would n't go believing one of them silly dime novels would you
jesse have you ever noticed that when you 're trying to charm your way out of trouble your accent gets all farm boy
aw shucks ma'am
stop it
this is just sad
swimming
swimming is good
do n't turn around
what
if you do n't see it it 's not real
you get arrested again i 'll kill you
yes ma'am
i ca n't believe i had to blow up a train for you
you are a hell of a woman
do n't swear
yes ma'am
tennessee
i 'll explain on the way
we 're moving you tomorrow
but i like the presidential suite
oh it 's a similar room
but the hotel is in washington d.c. you 're not going to get a fair trial down here in front of a jury of jesse james sympathizers
so i 'll get a fair trial in front of a jury bought off by thaddeus rains
that 's the idea
how did you spot the ambush in torrell
last february
mmm
you had all those cattle there so i 'd think the extra men were in town from the cattle drive
yes
the cows had a brand from a farm just five miles out of town
damn
almost got me in billings
i saw you there shooting at me
i went myself to oversee the operation
did n't help much
no that one was close
a couple fellas quit after that one
oh
that 's nice to know
we 're going to hang you you know
i figured
was it worth it
should have just killed thaddeus rains and been done with it
that 's what i would have done
i 'm not hanged yet
you cocky little bastard
ahh you 'll miss me
no i 'll hang you
but i may miss you just a bit
that was for my ma
now this is for everybody else
he 's too important james
they 'll set the army on you
you and your wife
the railroad has no business in tennessee
therefore i have no interest in the state of tennessee
thanks
i 'd just as soon kill you jesse james
but chasing you takes up too much of my time
fair enough
this is unusual
most of our marriages are members of the congregation
you do n't think god'll mind do you
the lord is remarkably tolerant of the charitable
jesse woodson james
jesse james
the jesse james
i could have lied i suppose but i want this marriage to be legal
i just want you to know i 'm trying to start a new life here
i 'm depending on your
discretion
sir i am a man of the cloth
thank you
who needs to repair a leaky church roof
now let 's have a drink
right here in church
communion
you okay jesse
yeah
hey are you drinking whisky
you 're too young to be drinking whisky
not too young to shoot a man not to young to drink
i guess so
i was always jealous web mimms got to go off and fight with you and cole
now it 's my turn
jim you been with a girl yet
tonight
why i 'm just getting ready to turn on the younger charm
well not exactly
you been with a girl ever
hell yeah
i been with
uh not exactly
it 's just i do n't want to get one of these paid ladies you know
i think so
you and frank and cole and even bob get all these girls because you 're good looking and famous
you do n't have to pay
they just look at me like i 'm the baby brother
do n't tell anyone okay jesse
i swear
tell you something else
i ca n't drink that good neither
i 'm going to go outside and throw up
you do that
what about that rock island bastard
it 's his money
he 's putting up the payroll out of his own fortune
you do want to hurt thaddeus rains do n't you jesse
... too young for whisky
this time we 'll make an exception
jesse you explain to lyla
my girl you know from that time
you 're gon na tell her when you 're resting up in bed with her jimmy
why yeah
i hope you do n't mind jesse james told me your name
oh you were talking to jesse
yes but just so i could find out who you were
really
i hope i 'm not being too forward
not at all
i just though you were awful cute
thank you miss --
lyla devereux
gosh that 's a pretty name
buy you a drink
could we go upstairs and talk
it 's so loud down here
why do n't we get a bottle of sherry to sip while we talk
that is so gentlemanly of you
devereux
my brother cole dated a european girl once
really
do n't talk about it much though
my professional opinion is that you have managed to piss off the wrong bunch of farm boys this time
they had to be dealt with
by burning down their homes
how can that be
they donate money to farmers to churches
rumor has it they gave the sharecroppers of maddox so much money they were able to build a school
there 's only four of them
move you fools
mr. thaddeus rains sir it is a pleasure to have you join us in the field
and it is my pleasure to be here
really
no
it is not my pleasure to have to leave my board room to come to this godforsaken piece of dirt to discover why in the name of all that is holy you can not seem to evict a few simple farmers from their pathetic little mudholes so that i may build the greatest railroad that this country has ever seen
i can completely understand your distress sir
parker tell me what 's going on so i can return as quickly as possible to boston and my whores and cigars not necessarily in that order
two weeks ago we managed to arrange to have the army hang one of the local farmers
good
unfortunately not sir
a gang of local thugs managed to rescue him from the gallows
not only has this inspired resistance from the other farmers the redoubtable mr. alan pinkerton was seriously injured during the incident
leaving you in charge of operations until he recovers
yes sir
just perfect
a further impediment is that the army garrison has been ordered to move on from liberty
we will no longer have that particular stick with which to threaten the farmers
you see the army leaving and you see the loss of a tool
i see a power void to be filled
as we have the most power we may move with impunity
i see
i 'll get together four patrols of our detectives for action tonight
i 'll teach these podunks what happens when they challenge the righteousness of progress
they exchanged fire with the pinkerton guards killing several of them
then they raided the payroll office and blew the tracks for half a mile
how much did they get from the safe
thirty five thousand sir
coins and currency
and the delay from the miles of destroyed track --
i 'll kill them for blowing up my railway
to be precise they did n't blow up the tracks
then who did
we did
your men knew the risks
what is going on here man
with my money
we should go burn that school to the ground sir
that
oh that
i 'll let jenkins explain
this is him
i remember you
how did you know
not such a menace now is he pinkerton
look at this pinkerton
they got the payroll and this damage will set construction back two months at least
not to mention my men who lost their lives
you would n't have done that
oh no i would have done that
but i would have made sure i killed them too
i want them arrested and hanged
would a jury around here convict their own
i think not
we 're beginning an interesting game here mr. rains
this is no game
i 'm afraid our adversaries do n't agree
a rock island and pacific railroad depot was robbed two nights ago just outside st. louis missouri
the brave and daring james younger gang was heavily outnumbered by pinkerton detectives but the city lawmen were no match for the guns of the west
it is a nice piece of writing
the gang made off with thirty five thousand dollars and also destroyed the thaxton switch construction meaning that for a few months honest farmers will be able to sleep without fearing the railroad is coming to steal their land
who wrote this
i 'll see him hanged every tuesday for a month
oh that 's the best part
it 's early in the game yet mr. rains
jesse james and i are just learning how each other moves feeling out each other 's patterns
i 'm losing millions of dollars and months of time while you play chess with these farmers
hardly farmers
i 've done some checking
all these were in the war
these men know sabotage tactics and have four years of bloody fighting experience behind them
they are disciplined well trained and have a charismatic leader
if i were to design the perfect outlaw band this gang is what i would create
so you ca n't tell me anything
it 's going to be a long winter
pinkerton
it 's been eight months
i see robberies
i see hold ups
but i do not see men on the end of nooses
all of the james gang 's encounters have been with local law enforcement who quite frankly are no match for this group 's cunning
so he 's won
no
every three months the james gang circles back to the vicinity of liberty missouri
they always pull a job right before they return probably to have extra money to give family and friends
in english pinkerton
there are only four banks within that travel radius which they have not robbed
can you put men at all four
no need
i have another tool at my disposal which will narrow it down to one bank
what is that
why their intense hatred of you of course
what the hell is that sound
vengeance
listen what are you doing tonight
what
oh i'm
busy
listen you 're dating luis he 's in arizona
you 're fucking me and we have n't made plans
what could you possibly be up to tonight
stop it
i 'm
on a lot of lithium
waiting for luis to call me
he said he 'd call tonight
oh do n't be difficult patrick
you should come have dinner with me
courtney but when
am i confused or were we talking about tonight
ummm
yeah
luis is calling me tonight
i need to be home for that
pumpkin
yes
pumpkin you 're dating an asshole
uh huh
pumpkin you 're dating the biggest dickweed in new york
i know
stop it
pumpkin you 're dating a tumbling tumbling dickweed
patrick do n't call me pumpkin anymore okay
i have to go
courtney
dinner
i ca n't
i 'm thinking dorsia
dorsia 's nice
nice
you like it there do n't you
the question is do you like it courtney
and will you blow off a fucking phone call from your sad excuse for a boyfriend to eat there tonight
okay
yeah
what time
eight
pick me up
sounds like i 'll have to
do n't fall asleep okay
wear something fabulous
dorsia remember
a facial at elizabeth arden which was really relaxing then to the pottery bam where i bought this silver muffin dish
is that donald trump 's car
oh god patrick
shut up
you know courtney you should take some more lithium
or have a diet coke
some caffeine might get you out of this slump
i just want to have a child
just
two
perfect
children
j&b. straight
champagne on the rocks
oh could i have that with a twist
she starts to sink back in her chair and bateman leans over and pulls her back up
are we here
yes
this is dorsia
yes dear
courtney you 're going to have the peanut butter soup with smoked duck and mashed squash
new york magazine called it a playful but mysterious little dish
you 'll love it
and then
the red snapper with violets and pine nuts
i think that 'll follow nicely
mmmm
thanks patrick
luis is a despicable twit
yes luis is a despicable twit
i hate him
oh jesus
i 'm going home
patrick
turn on the light
he turns on the light
it 's a plain end see
so
take it off
why
because you have to leave half an inch at the tip to catch the force of the ejaculate
bateman i 'm getting out of here
where 's your lithium
oh christ this really is n't worth it
and see courtney it 's there for what
huh
tell us
why is it pulled down half an inch
so it can catch the force of the ejaculate
well it 's not a turn on for me
i have a promotion coming to me
i do n't want to get aids
see
happy
you dumb bitch
are you happy you dumb bitch
oh god just get it over with
will you call me before thanksgiving
maybe
what are you doing tonight
dinner at the river cafe
au bar afterwards maybe
that 's nice
you and
luis
we were supposed to have dinner at tad and maura 's but you know how luis is
i never knew you smoked
you never noticed
listen
patrick
can we talk
you look marvelous
there 's nothing to say
you 're going to marry luis
next week no less
is n't that special
patrick
yes courtney
patrick
yes
nothing
i have n't seen you around here
you just have n't been looking
would you like to see my apartment
i 'm not so sure about this
i had to go to emergency after last time
oh this wo n't be anything like last time i promise
i do n't think so
nothing like last time promise
alright
so you 're looking great how have you been
well i actually might need a little surgery after last time
really
my friend told me i should maybe even get a lawyer
oh lawyers are so complicated don't do that
here
this is nicer than your other apartment
it 's not that nice
marzipan
pink tents
hundreds thousands of roses
photographers
annie leibovitz
we 'll get annie leibovitz
and we 'll hire someone to videotape
patrick we should do it
do
what
get married
have a wedding
evelyn
yes darling
is your evian spiked
we should do it
no i ca n't take the time off work
your father practically owns the company
you can do anything you like silly
i do n't want to talk about it
well you hate that job anyway
why do n't you just quit
you do n't have to work
because i
want
to
fit
in
pat this is my cousin vanden and her boyfriend stash
he 's an artist
hi
pat bateman
why don t you just go for price
oh god patrick
why price
price
he 's rich
everybody 's rich
he 's good looking
everybody 's good looking patrick
he has a great body
everybody has a great body now
are you using minoxidil
no
i 'm not
why should i
your hairline looks like it 's receding
it 's not
we need to talk
talk about what patrick
what is there to talk about
it 's over evelyn
it 's all over
touchy touchy
i 'm sorry i brought the wedding up
let 's just avoid the issue alright
now are we having coffee
i 'm fucking serious
it 's fucking over
us
this is no joke
i do n't think we should see each other anymore
but your friends are my friends
my friends are your friends
i do n't think it would work
you have a little something on your upper lip
i know that your friends are my friends
i 've thought about that
you can have them
you 're really serious are n't you
yes i am
but what about the past
our past
we never really shared one
you 're inhuman
i'm
in touch with humanity
evelyn i 'm sorry
you 're just not terribly important to me
no no no
i know my behavior is
erratic sometimes
if you really want to do something for me you can stop making this scene right now
oh god i ca n't believe this
i 'm leaving now
i 've assessed the situation and i 'm going
where are you going
i 'm just leaving
but where
i have to return some videotapes
you 'll notice that my friends and i all look and behave in a remarkably similar fashion but there are subtle differences between us
mcdermott is the biggest asshole
van patten is the yes man
price is the most wired
i 'm the best looking
we all have light tans
right now i 'm in a bad mood because this is not a good table and van patten keeps asking dumb obvious questions about how to dress
what are the rules for a sweater vest
picked them up from the printers yesterday
good coloring
that 's bone
and the lettering is something called silian rail
eggshell with romalian type
what do you think
nice
do you know what ed gein said about women
ed gein
maitre d at canal bar
no serial killer wisconsin in the fifties
he was an interesting guy
listen what about dinner
is that all you ever have to contribute van patten
what about fucking dinner
are you my two o'clock
no
can i help you
i 'm looking for
paul owen's
place
does n't he live here
no he does n't
are you sure
you saw the ad in the times
no
yes
i mean yes i did
in the times
but
does n't paul owen still live here
there was no ad in the times
i think you should go now
but i think
i want to know what happened here
do n't make any trouble
please
i suggest you go
do n't come back
i won't
don't worry
excuse me gentlemen
right back
he approaches carnes cautiously
face it the japanese will own most of this country by the end of the 90s
by the way davis how is cynthia
you 're still seeing her right
but wait harold what do you mean
carnes
wait
davis
i 'm not one to bad mouth anyone your joke was amusing
but come on man you had one fatal flaw bateman 's such a dork such a boring spineless lightweight that i could n't fully appreciate it
i was n't fooled for a second
now if you 'd said price or mcdermott
otherwise it was amusing
now let 's have lunch or dinner or something
hilarious davis
a killer
what are you talking about
bateman is what
oh christ
he can barely pick up an escort girl let alone
what was it you said he did to her
now if you 'll excuse me i really must
wait
stop
you do n't seem to understand
you 're not really comprehending any of this
i killed him
i did it carnes
i 'm patrick bateman
i chopped owen 's fucking head off
i tortured dozens of girls
the whole message i left on your machine was true
excuse me
i really must he going
no
listen do n't you know who i am
i 'm not davis i 'm patrick bateman
i talk to you on the phone all the time
do n't you recognize me
you 're my lawyer
now carnes listen to me
listen very very carefully
i killed paul owen and i liked it
i ca n't make myself any clearer
but that 's simply not possible
and i do n't find this funny anymore
it never was supposed to he
why is n't it possible
it 's just not
why not you stupid bastard
because i had dinner with paul owen twice in london
just ten days ago
no you
didn't
now if you 'll excuse me
patrick thanks so much for looking after courtney
dorsia how impressive
how on earth did you get a reservation there
lucky i guess
that 's a wonderful jacket
let me guess valentino couture
uh huh
it looks so soft
your compliment was sufficient luis
patrick
is that you
no luis
it 's not me
you 're mistaken
this is gwendolyn ichiban
this is my very good friend patrick bateman
where are you going
we 're going to nell 's
gwendolyn 's father 's buying it
where did you get your overnight bag
commes des garcon
call me please patrick
jesus lives luis
that 's paul owen
that 's not paul owen
paul owen 's on the other side of the room
over there
there 's this theory out now that if you can catch the aids virus through having sex with someone who is infected then you can also catch anything alzheimer 's muscular dystrophy hemophilia leukemia diabetes dyslexia for christ 's sake you can get dyslexia from pussy-
i 'm not sure guy but i do n't think dyslexia is a virus
oh who knows
they do n't know that
prove it
jeez
that 's not a helluva lot is it
maybe it 's just the light
is he fucking selling it by the milligram
oh my god
what
it 's a fucking milligram of sweet'n low
it 's definitely weak but i have a feeling if we do enough of it we 'll be okay
i want to get high off this bateman not sprinkle it on my fucking all bran
shut up
calm down
let 's do it anyway
i guess you 're right
that is if the faggot in the next stall thinks it 's okay
oh come on
price
there are a lot more important problems than sri lanka to worry about
sure our foreign policy is important but there are more pressing problems at hand
like what
well we have to end apartheid for one
and slow down the nuclear arms race stop terrorism and world hunger
but we ca n't ignore our social needs
either we have to stop people from abusing the welfare system
we have to provide food and shelter for the homeless and oppose racial discrimination and promote civil rights while also promoting equal rights for women but change the abortion laws to protect the right to life yet still somehow maintain women 's freedom of choice
what 's that a gram
new card
what do you think
i ca n't believe that price prefers mcdermott 's card to mine
but wait
you ai n't seen nothin' yet
i 'm leaving
i 'm getting out
leaving what
this
do n't i 'll drink it
listen to me patrick
i 'm leaving
where to
are you going to go get a gram
i 'm leaving
i
am
leaving
do n't tell me
merchant banking
no you dumb son of a bitch
i 'm serious
i 'm disappearing
where to
morgan stanley
rehab
what
and bateman what are you so fucking zany about
i 'm just a happy camper
rockin and a rollin
van patten rehab 's done wonders for you pal
working for unicef now
dorsia
umm
yes
i know it 's a little late but is it possible to reserve a table for two at eight or eight thirty perhaps
marcus halberstam
for two at eight
your friend has already been seated
follow me mr. halberstam
dorsia yes
yes can you take two tonight oh let 's say at nine o'clock
we are totally booked
oh really
that 's great
i said we are totally booked
two at nine
perfect
there are no tables available tonight
the waiting list is also totally booked
see you then
late
aerobics class
sorry
any messages
ricky hendricks has to cancel today
he did n't say what he was canceling or why
i occasionally box with ricky at the harvard club
anyone else
and
spencer wants to meet you for a drink at fluties pier 17
when
after six
negative
cancel it
oh something
romantic
no silly
forget it
i 'll make them
thanks
i 'll do it
no
no
be a doll and just get me a perrier okay
you look nice today
yes
is that the ransom file
thanks
do n't wear that outfit again
ummm
what
i did n't hear you
i said do not wear that outfit again
wear a dress
a skirt or something
you do n't like this i take it
come on you 're prettier than that
thanks patrick
what is it
patrick
ye es je an
patrick a mr. donald kimball is here to see you
who
detective donald kimball
tell him i 'm at lunch
patrick i think he knows you 're here
it 's only ten thirty
patrick
can you bring mr
yes patrick
bring us an ashtray for mr. kimball please
she whisks in with a crystal ashtray as they sit in silence
jean
yes patrick
would you like to accompany me to dinner
soooo
dorsia is where jean wants to go
oh i do n't know
no we 'll go anywhere you want
dorsia is
fine
yes
you 're dressed
okay
you did n't give them a name
they know me
jean
sorbet
thanks patrick
i 'd love some
want a bite
i 'm on a diet
but thank you
you do n't need to lose any weight
you 're kidding right
you look great
very fit
you can always he thinner
look
better
well maybe we should n't go out to dinner
i do n't want to ruin your willpower
no
it 's all right
i 'm not very good at controlling it anyway
and do n't tell me you enjoy working with children okay
well i 'd like to travel
and maybe go back to school but i really do n't know
i'm at a point in my life where there seems lo be a lot of possibilities but i 'm so
i do n't know
unsure
do you have a boyfriend
no not really
interesting
are you seeing anyone
i mean seriously
maybe
i do n't know not really
bateman opens up a cupboard where there are a lot of very bateman opens a cupboard where there are a lot of neatly ordered weapons an ax a rifle a chain saw duct tape twine and a nail gun
jean do you feel
fulfilled
i mean in your life
well i guess i do
for a long time i was too focused on my work i think but now i 've really begun to think about changing myself you know developing and
growing
growing
i 'm glad you said that
did you know that ted bundy 's first dog a collie was named lassie
had you heard this
who 's ted bundy
forget it
what 's that
oh
uh tape
duct tape
i
need it for
taping something
bateman goes back to the cupboard for the nail gun
patrick have you ever wanted to make someone happy
what
no
put it in the carton
sorry
jean
what
make someone happy have you ever wanted to
if you stay i think something bad will happen
i think i might hurt you
you do n't want to get hurt do you
no
no i guess not
i do n't want to get bruised
you 're right i should go
and do n't forget you have a breakfast meeting with frederick bennet and charles rust at 21
thanks
it slipped my mind completely
patrick bateman 's office
jean
hello
jean
patrick
is that you
hello
jean i need help
where are you
jean i'm not-
craig mcdermott called
he wants to meet you and david van patten and tim price at harry 's for drinks
oh god what did you say you dumb bitch
patrick
i ca n't hear you
what are i doing
where are you
patrick what 's wrong
i do n't think i 'm gon na make it jean
... to the office this afternoon
why
just
say
no
what is it patrick
are you alright
stop sounding so fucking sad
jesus
so what do you do
what do you think i do
a model
an actor
no
flattering but no
well
i m into well murders and executions mostly
welt
it depends why
well most guys i know who work in mergers and acquisitions do n't really like it
oh really
daisy he said
he said you gave him bad vibes
that's
that 's too bad
you think i 'm dumb do n't you
what
you think i 'm dumb
you think all models are dumb
no
i really do n't
that 's okay
i do n't mind
there 's something sweet about you
hi patrick
i thought that was you
hello
hubert 's
oh really
it moved uptown right
yeah well oh boy listen i 've got to go
thank you uh
victoria
maybe we could have lunch one day next week
you know i 'm downtown near wall street quite often
oh i do n't know victoria
i 'm at work all the time
well what about oh you know maybe a saturday
next saturday
yeah
oh ca n't i 'm afraid
matine of les miserables
listen i 've really got to go
i'll oh
christ
i'll call you
okay
do
what do you mean she was a hot number
if you had an american express card she 'd give you a blowjob
listen this girl worked in a tanning salon need i say more?
what do you do
she 's my
cousin
uh huh
she 's from
france
elizabeth it 's three in the morning
he 's a goddamn drug dealer
these are his peak hours
do n't tell him you 're here
why would i
this tastes weird
harley
it 's me
i need your services
translate that anyway you 'd like
i 'm at-
you 're at paul owen s.
who
paul owen
i want the number idiot
anyway i 'm at paul norman 's and i 'll try you later and if i do n't see you at canal bar tomorrow night i 'm going to sic my hairdresser on you
did you know that guy who disappeared
did n't he work at pierce pierce too
was he a friend of yours
no
do you have any coke
or halcyon
i 'd take a halcyon
listen i would just like to see
the two of you
get it on
what 's wrong with that
it 's totally disease free
patrick you re a lunatic
come on
do n't you find christie attractive
let 's not get lewd
i 'm in no mood to have a lewd conversation
come on
i think it would be a turn on
does he do this all the time
are you telling me you 've never gotten it on with a girl
no
i 'm not a lesbian
why do you think i 'd be into that
well you went to sarah lawrence for one thing
those are sarah lawrence guys patrick
you 're making me feel weird
hi
i 'm donald kimball
hi
pat bateman
nice to meet you
i 'm sorry to barge in on you like this
but i was supposed to talk to luis carruthers and he was n't in and
well you 're here so
i know how busy you guys can get
so what 's the topic of discussion
i 've been hired by meredith powell to investigate the disappearance of paul owen
you 're not with the fbi or anything are you
nothing like that
i 'm just a private investigator
ah i see
yes
paul 's disappearance
yes
so it 's nothing that official
i just have some basic questions
about paul owen
about yourself-
coffee
no
i 'm okay
perrier
san pellegrino
no i 'm okay
kimball
mr. kimball a bottle of san pelle-
oh no i 'm okay
it 's no problem
well what 's the topic of discussion
the disappearance of paul owen
oh right
well i have n't heard anything about the disappearance or anything
not on page six at least
i think his family wants this kept quiet
understandable
lime
no really
i 'm okay
you sure
i can always get you a lime
just some preliminary questions that i need for my own files okay
shoot
how old are you
twenty six
i 'll be twenty seven in october
where did you go to school
harvard
the harvard business school
your address
fifty five west eighty first street
the american gardens building
nice
very nice
thanks
pardon me but are you okay
who do you ask
you seem
nervous
bad habit
i know
i 'm sorry
would you rather i not smoke
no i guess it 's okay
you sure
no problem
yeah
yale thing
what do you mean
yale thing
so
there 's nothing you can tell me about paul owen
he led what i suppose was an orderly life
he
ate a balanced diet
what kind of man was he
besides
the information you 've just given
i hope i 'm not being cross examined here
do you feel that way
no
not really
where did paul hang out
hang
out
yeah
you know
hang out
let me think
the newport
harry 's
fluties
endochine
nell 's
comell club
the new york yacht club
the regular places
he had a yacht
no he just hung out there
and where did he go to school
do n't you know this
i just wanted to know if you know
bateman before yale
if i remember correctly saint paul 's
listen i just
i just want to help
anything else you can tell me about owen
we were both seven in 1969
so was i.
do you have any witnesses or fingerprints
well there 's a message on his answering machine saying he went to london
well maybe he did huh
his girlfriend does n't think so
but
has anyone seen him in london
actually yes
hmmm
well i 've had a hard time getting an actual verification
a stephen hughes says he saw him at a restaurant there but i checked it out and what happened is he mistook a hubert ainsworth for paul so
oh
was he involved at all do you think in occultism or satan worship
what
i know it sounds like a lame question but in new jersey i know this sounds like a lame question but last month i do n't know if you 've heard about this but a young stockbroker was recently arrested and charged with murdering a young chicano girl and performing voodoo rituals with various body parts-
yikes
no
paul was n't into that
he followed a balanced diet and-
yeah i know and was into that whole yale thing
have you consulted a psychic
no
had his apartment been burglarized
no it actually had n't
toiletries were missing
a suit was gone
so was some luggage
that 's it
i mean no one 's dealing with the homicide squad yet or anything right
no not yet
as i said we 're not sure
but
basically no one has seen or heard anything
that 's so typical is n't it
it 's just strange
one day someone 's walking around going to work alive and then
nothing
people just
disappear
the earth just opens up and swallows people
eerie
really eerie
you 'll have to excuse me
i have a lunch meeting with cliff huxtable at four seasons in twenty minutes
is n't the four seasons a little far uptown
i mean are n't you going to be late
uh no
there 's one
down here
oh really
i did n't know that
listen if anything occurs to you any information at all
absolutely i 'm 100 with you
great and thanks for your uh time mr. bateman
detective kendall
uh campbell
kimball kimball
call me don
don
so
you hang out here a lot
uh yes
i mean
whenever necessary
you know
i actually came to see timothy price but he 's taken a leave of absence
yeah gone into rehab
shame
is he a suspect
not really
do you remember where you were on the night of paul 's disappearance
which was on the twentieth of december
god
i guess
i was probably returning videotapes
i had a date with a girl named veronica
wait
that 's not what i 've got
what
that 's not the information i 've received
well
i
wait
what information have you received
let 's see
that you were with-
well i could he wrong
well
when was the last time you were with paul owen
we had
gone to a new musical called
oh africa brave africa
it was
a laugh riot
and that 's about it
i think we had dinner at orso 's
no petaluma
no orso 's
the
last time i physically saw him was
at an automated teller
i ca n't remember which
just one that was near um nell 's
well thank you mr. bateman
patrick please
i hope i 've been informative
long day a bit scattered
listen i 'm a little spent for now but how about lunch in a week or so when i 've sorted out all this information
great yes i 'd like that
and if you could try and pin down where you were the night of owen 's disappearance it would make my job a lot easier
absolutely
i 'm with you on that one
never
i mean
i do n't really like
singers
not a big music fan eh
no i like music
just they're huey 's too
black sounding
for me
well to each his own
so lunch thursday
i 'll call your secretary about reservations
i 'll be there
no hash browns
not in the mood i guess
but
everyone orders the hash browns here
i mean- it's have you been here before
yes of course
the hash browns are delicious
i 'm just
not
ordering them
suit yourself i guess
so the night he disappeared
any new thoughts on what you did
i 'm not really sure
i had a shower
and some sorbet
i think maybe you 've got your dates mixed up
but how
where do you place paul that night
according to his date book and this was verified by his secretary he had dinner with
marcus halberstam
and
i 've questioned him
marcus
yes
and he denies it
though at first he could n't be sure
but marcus denied it
yes
well does marcus have an alibi
yes
he does
you 're sure
i checked it out
it 's clean
oh
kimball now where were you
where was marcus
he was n't with paul owen
so who was he with
he was at atlantis with craig mcdermott frederick dibble harry newman george butner and you
gee uh that 's too bad
i 'm so hungry
why do n't you get another one
why do n't you get another job
i 'm not
you 're not what
qualified for anything else
i 'm hungry
i know that i know that
jeez you 're like a broken record
i 'm trying to help you
i 'm hungry
listen do you think it 's fair to take money from people who do have jobs
from people who do work
what am i gon na do
listen what 's your name
al
speak up
come on
al
get a goddamn job al
you 've got a negative attitude
that 's what 's stopping you
you 've got to get your act together
i 'll help you
you re so kind mister
you 're kind
you 're a kind man
i can tell
shhhh
it 's okay
please
i don know what to do
i 'm so cold
do you know how bad you smell
the stench my god
i can't
i ca n't find a shelter
you reek
you reek of
shit
do you know that
goddammit al look at me and stop crying like some kind of faggot
al
i'm sorry
hello halberstam
nice tie
how the hell are you
i 've been great
and you
how 's the ransom account going marcus
it's
it's
all right
really
that 's interesting
not great
oh well you know
and how 's cecilia
she 's a great girl
oh yes
i 'm very lucky
listen the mud soup and the charcoal arugula are outrageous here
yeah well you 're late
hey i 'm a child of divorce
give me a break hmmm i see they 've omitted the pork loin with lime jello
we should 've gone to dorsia
i could 've gotten us a table
nobody goes there anymore
so was n't rothschild originally handling the fisher account
how did you get it
i could tell you that halberstam but then i 'd have to kill you
and cecelia how is she
where is she tonight
cecelia is well
you know
evelyn
great ass
goes out with that loser patrick bateman
what a dork
another martini paul
paul give me your amex card
good boy
bateman slaps the card down looks at the check
two hundred and fifty
very reasonable
let 's leave a big tip shall we
my place hr a nightcap
no man
i 'm gon na bail
come on you dumb son of a bitch
i 've got a preview of the barneys catalogue and a bottle of absolut waiting for us
you think so
you 'll look like you consciously worked for the look
good point
excuse me gentlemen
how can he lie like that
how can he pull that shit
what shit
now where do we have reservations at
i mean i 'm not really hungry but i would like to have reservations somewhere
i do n't believe it
he looks so
normal
he seems so
out of it
so
undangerous
i just do n't see how someone anyone can appear that way and yet be involved in such total shit
how can you be so fucking i do n't know cool about it
some guys are just born cool i guess
is it over
they still have to give 'em refreshments laced with mind altering drugs
you are a fanatic
gon na wait outside
alice
you got ta make him do the start up with teddy and me
make him
you know what i mean
i 'm just screwed
you know what he 's like
he just wants to work on stuff that 's cool
you do n't wanna move do you
i can paint anywhere
i ca n't help it
i feel like they 'd do anything to keep their --
anything
that 's not even credible
if he wants to go up there
to check it out
i think you should encourage him
it 's his life
but everybody 's treating him like this -- valuable object
you 're hurting your own case
i think i kind of lost it
i was just so thrilled to be talking to the richest most powerful
did n't know i even cared about that stuff
c'mon how often do you talk to somebody who 's been on the cover of time
three of four times
when i was a kid
and he was moving us all over the place
i spent all my time writing stuff on outpost 1.0
i thought gary boyd was the greatest
but he 's not quite the same guy anymore
do n't get your hopes too high
if my dad'd leveled with me like that even once
the weird thing is my fantasy he could somehow be like the old gary
it 's his fantasy too
i think that 's great milo
i do
... but
did n't you visit the campus
i forgot
that 's why you have to help me decide
no way
you have this -- destiny
c'mon i would n't have a destiny without you
my destiny would be dying at 20
from eating --
do n't bring that up
like a different girlfriend would'd've let you die
you saved my life in alot of ways
when 's brian coming for the tv
prob'ly waiting by the phone for outpost to call
we 'll leave it for him
that took some fun out of --
we 're not gon na let it
you know he 's never been anybody 's counselor before
milo
what about --
to our new life
what 's wrong
that 's what i need to ask you
you know you ca n't keep anything from me
he gave me some new code fixes this morning
i said did you really do this just today
cause i was impressed
he said what 're you implying
it 's the way he said it
just the way my dad did when he was caught in a lie
that 's how you knew you were onto something ugly
what would it mean anyway
if he did n't write it
that 's what i 'm asking myself
does he have some genius stowed away
why not let him write skywire
not saying it makes sense
he 's your boss
he 's not your --
i know i know
if you ca n't deal with him on that basis you better get a new counselor
is n't that -- extreme
what 's extreme is what that er doctor said when he pumped your stomach
eat another sesame seed and that 's it
are you saying you think they had something to do with his death
nelson said it was an airtight case
i do n't know what i 'm saying
maybe -- maybe they hired those guys
i ca n't see outpost putting its reputation in the hands of people like that
i do n't know
i just know it was teddy 's code
all these ideas flying in from everywhere
you know how he says any kid working in his garage can put us out of business
it 's like they know what every kid 's doing
they hack into people 's programs
nobody does work like this on line
it 's in your pc or in a mainframe
self contained
they 'd have to be like watching people
physically
oh jesus
it is n't a broadcast studio
it 's -- a surveillance post or something
that 's why they have the dishes on top
you 're scaring me
i think we should just go
go where
you ca n't get away from people like this
like this
it 's gary you 're talking about
you think i do n't know that
milo
why would he --
how should i know
solving a problem i guess
or needing to control everything
i do n't know
i 've got ta get in there
even if all this were true
there 're 20 other buildings
all of them filled with computers and --
it 's the only one with dishes on the roof
the studio 's a front
that 's why they keep postponing its opening
got ta get in there
milo you told me those doj agents are all over the place
how could they hope to hide a surveillance post
and how can you get in there anyway
with the cameras and the swipe cards --
i ca n't just walk away
you ca n't just walk in either
they stop the construction work at six or seven
the parking lot 's mostly clear by two or three in the morning
even the early geeks do n't get there before five
is it two
or is it three
have you ever really noticed
i know how to get in there
but you 've got ta help me
... whaddo i do
so you believe me
it 's almost nine i 've been so worried
what did you see in there
nothing
nothing
it 's what they said it is
an unfinished broadcast studio
you were right
i just drove to seattle and back
... why
remember lyle barton
the justice department guy who came to the apartment when --
i remember
after i broke into 21 -- which was insane thank god they did n't catch me
-- i just drove around
trying to figure out what possessed me
you know what
i 've been putting my own guilt on gary
guilt
if i 'd stayed down there maybe this would n't 've happened
poor baby
you know that 's not true
that was -- different
... different
where were you
you know you ca n't keep anything from me
okay yeah
i did something naughty
there 's this amazing comix store in seattle
to tell you the truth i did it once or twice at stanford
guess i ca n't keep anything from you
no
no
i sent an e mail to somebody just now
to tell her how i feel about you
you know i 'm clueless without you
you know i --
just shut up
great
look at me
i 'm gon na change
you look beautiful
yeah
give me a goodbye kiss
... what
i know you
you 're gon na run back to work right after dinner
i want my kiss now
milo
do n't we have any chopsticks
oh right
hold on
here we go
great
... wanna savor this
it 's gon na get cold
right
wait
a toast
you 're just afraid to eat it
did n't mention he was going to the justice department
no
not like him is it
to do a thing like that without telling you
you 're not losing your hold on him are you
he 'll tell me when he gets home
that 'll be a test wo n't it
instead of busting my chops you should do something about that girl
fire her
or something
lisa 's an extremely valuable member of the skywire team
we 've got our eyes on her
you keep yours on milo
prick
he said it made sense that gary 's code was like teddy 's that that clich about great minds was true
said it was all about his own guilt
plus he has a tendency to get gary mixed up with his dad once in a while
it always passes
he was n't acting
i do n't think he knows how
milo
yeah
hi
thank you for seeing me
have a seat
what seems to be the problem
you look a little upset
i am
i am sir
milo
my friend my best friend teddy was killed in silicon valley
my goodness
it was racially motivated
he 's chinese
he was
and
i know sometimes the fbi gets involved with that
do n't they
if there 's a civil rights violation
but generally we let the local police and da do their work first
i -- just wanna help bring these guys to justice
they 're neo nazis
let me look into it see what 's being done
frankly it 's not my area
just did n't know who else to talk to
and outpost
you 're happy there
yes sir
you 're living here
thought if i relocated it could help my case
i 'm writing programs for the local public access station
where any whack job with 100 bucks gets his own show
god does it suck
can you help me
sure i 'll see what i can do
well i parked illegally
see y'later
forgot to introduce you
i have a girlfriend
this is the biggest beta demo in like the history of software
you 'd be my partner
you ca n't pre empt yoga that 's our biggest show
brian
you wanna be a big deal do n't you
that 's your dream in life
will i get to work for outpost
no
but you can write your own ticket in the valley after this
we 're gon na bring down outpost
what
what 'd they ever do for you
okay
great
great
we need to drag a lot of heavy stuff in front of the door --
what
wanna be a part of history
what
he 's working backwards too
let 's do number five
... when did you know
you should 've called a few times to bug me about your job prospects
that 's got ta kill him right
outpost was his baby sure
on the other hand we just learned gary boyd owns the skywire satellites
personally
outpost does n't own em
conglomerates're lined up to finance the launch of the remaining satellites
they 'll pay him a huge premium to get on line
that 'd change with a criminal indictment
there 's no hard evidence he knew about this
anybody who could implicate him seems to've vanished
is n't there a stigma
bankrolling this guy
stigma
larry
60 billion buys you some slack in this world
and the kid who wrote skywire -- then gave it away
they 're calling him the digital robin hood
milo
surprised he 's not your guest
we tried
you better believe everybody 's trying to sign him up
milo
i 'm danny
oh hi
could n't convince teddy to come
he 's pretty tight with his family
we could move 'em up here
he just likes to write code
he 's bummed there 's so much secrecy and competition everybody trying to own everything
who 's that
i think they call him the houseman
'cause guard sounds too weird
... hello
milo
gary boyd
i 'm hoping you and your friend can come up here
we 've made some amazing strides in digital convergence
i 'd love to show them to you
you would
wow
when would we come
think he hung up
i 've only shown this to three other people
i bought 200 we 've launched 12 so far
i keep the coordinates in this room
it 's left over from sdi
reagan 's star wars technology
they orbit 426 miles up
low enough to relay internet traffic
among other things
we know convergence is the real super highway all the pc 's tv 's phones etc
linked together
why cram it into a cable if you can use the whole sky
skywire
the content filer has t'be written into the media files so bits coming off the satellite can be read by multiplatforms
really omniplatforms
including whatever new hardware emerges
it needs a more object oriented language
this does n't scale does it
you 'd have to start practically from scratch
but this is all you 'd be working on
no marketing meetings no product seminars
we ca n't waste the time
half the valley 's working on convergence
so're media conglomerates cable companies phone companies
ca n't finish second milo
there is no second
now what would you like to ask me
when you get to a certain age you start wondering
about your legacy
i doubt you even remember outpost 1.0 --
i do
yeah
i wanna feel like i did when i wrote that
but i 'm 42 that 's 100 in cyber years
i look at you and see the things that got me here
but somehow got away
no
just waiting for my counselor to come by and introduce himself
okay
i 'm gary
think i should buy some originals
... do i
somebody said i 'm just another philistine
with reproductions
that 's insane
you 're ahead of your time
that 's what i told her
my wife
could work with a new switch
there may be a few more things hidden
do n't spend too much time searching
you ever vetted somebody 's old code before
it 's a different skill
stay close to the surface
the best hidden secrets are in plain sight
you know the best place to hide a leaf right
in a tree
how 's it going
maybe i 'm going too fast
too fast
at least four companies're on the verge of workable convergence systems milo they --
it 's okay
really
take a look at this
slightly different approach
you really wrote this just today
what 're you implying
nothing
everything i do is under scrutiny
the questions they ask trying to make anything strategic look sordid
i 'm confused
does n't everybody in business try to get ahead
i 'm sure
the purpose of this company is n't to destroy our competitors any more than the purpose of living is to breath
but the software business is binary you 're a zero or a one
being obsessive is n't a crime
it 's a character trait
it scales do n't you think
definitely
i heard what happened
were the flags for teddy
had you talked to him much lately
just once
guess i was worried we did n't have anything to talk about since work was off limits
non- disclosure
did you
talk about work
never
i meant did you find other stuff to --
oh
yeah
you 've been coming in early
it helps
alice said it would help
to focus on something
do n't know what i 'd do without her
wow
you must have 20,000 lines of code there
34,000
but they 're real short lines
just came out that way
been thinking about the push mechanism in the handler
and it came over me it 's in the wrong place
the wrong place
the answer 's not in the box
it 's in the band
gary hi
you look a little tired
i 'm okay
it 's going well
have a look
sure
that 's great
thanks
sorry about the late notice
dear lisa
i 've enjoyed working with you
i 'd be lying if i did n't say i find you attractive
but in my heart i know that alice
you left my party to send e mail
i could n't do it at work cause of security or at home for -- obvious reasons
you could 've handwritten it
i 'm not much good at handwriting
or parties
oh that 's right
you 're clueless
gary i --
you see what 's hanging on the wall
i hope you know what you mean to me
not just because of what you 're doing
because of who you are
i do know gary
i feel the same way
i thought i was coming here for a job
but it 's meant a lot more
i 'm pretty close
but when i wrote the last contact switches it wiped out a piece of the content filer
you know what it 's like writing software
i do know
you focus on the big problem
but somewhere down the chain something breaks down
something gets destroyed
at first it 's upsetting
you feel you 've lost control
this is good
who did it
start up not 50 miles from here
kid 's on prozac
maybe we should all get on it
what 'd the girl say
there may be a little less trust after your outburst
okay 2
longitude 48 degrees 06 minutes --
ready for number three
let 's go
longitude 109 --
wait
he knows
what
knows i 'm altering the coordinates
let 's jump to 12
gary
just do it
all the companies know
the faculties tell 'em
at the target schools
in exchange for endowments
they should just drop the pretense and name the schools after 'em
i think you should go
you do
i mean it 's your life
i know you lost all his work
maybe i could come down here and --
you are naive
look at your employment contract you ca n't work anywhere else in this field for at least few years
not that i do n't miss you
just thought his work should go on
he was on the verge of something too
he was gon na show us the next day
he said the answer 's not in the box it 's in the band
know what it means
it 's only meaningful when you 've got 40,000 lines of code to back it up
man could he write code
totally elegant
he had his own style
those really weird short lines
your app kind of blew mine out of the water
we 'll come up with the next big thing
... you wanna work -- here
got out of my other commitment
you guys'll be using teddy 's old space is that okay
cool
could it be a glitch
something the construction workers caused
unlikely
all 14 cameras are frozen
do we call randy and phil
tell 'em there may have been a break in
not yet
love to bust my ass cause i 'm not in frigging mensa
i swear to god it 's that kid milo i told 'em so in the first place but they did n't even wanna hear about it
let 's run a printout on card entries
get the backslash the colon keys kids do n't use but geeks do
what would milo want in here anyway
they know
just they do n't trust me with it
so we 'll get the evidence first ask questions later
you calling phil and randy
i 'm calling gary
come with me
where we going
now what are we doing
i do n't get any of this shit
i launched skywire
just pray the last set of coordinates milo sent me connected us to gary 's satellite
lisa
you know my name
you know mine
you 're famous around here
i 'm getting a teacher 's pet rep
i would n't worry about it
you 've got ta figure most people around here were their teachers pets
... were you
we moved around so much i barely knew my teachers
me too
were you an army brat or something
... something like that
yeah
did n't mean to pry
i just have this theory
some of us who got to good at this
we were -- escaping something
did i say something
no i know what you mean
i used to spend my life wishing people could be like computers
least they make sense
sometimes you think they 've betrayed you
like a person would
but then you see no you just missed a step
you can go back and make it all work
what 've you got there
graphical interfaces
for skywire
i 'm s'posed to coordinate with you
show me
cool
yeah
i ran it for lots of platforms ranging from the narrowest bandwidth to --
so when you were talking about wishing people were more like computers
was that then
or now
then and now
but not right now
that 's great
i -- did n't know
she saved my life
i snuck into 21
why would you do a thing like --
you thought about it too
you 've been suspicious for a while
but it 's not happening in there
it 's happening in the day care
the day care
it 's easy to know who the smart geeks are the schools tell 'em
they upload medical files school records pharmacy files
they 'd be happy just to steal code forever
but when a program gets close to fruition
like teddy
he was almost there
but why would they --
you know
there is no second place
and what 's the risk
the killings're undetectable they 're hand tailored they make sense
i mean they 're in the information business
they have scenarios for all of us too
in case we find out too much
i know why you 're so secretive
why you wo n't let anybody near you
i know what he did to you
oh yeah
is that my -- scenario
tell me
they 'd frame him
he 's out of prison
they 're already watching you
if they had to they 'd give him this drug that mimics an alcoholic blackout
he 'd wake up not even remembering his act of revenge
... milo
hmm
i always felt if a -- boy i liked ever found out -- he 'd run
he 'd think i was unclean
no no
never
what about the fbi
they 've got this guy in the doj maybe others
we tell the wrong person it 's over
who can we trust
there 's always a logical answer -- you just have to define the question
he 's buying up pretty much everything cable companies baby bells picture libraries museum rights film archives
getting ready for skywire
what about 60 minutes
yeah they dig stuff like this
cbs news has partnered with outpost information systems in a cable news network due to launch fall of 2001
but still you ca n't say cbs would n't love to break something like --
say there 's just one mole working there like barton at the doj
how do we know he 's not the guy we 've contacted
or she
or the guy she works for
time
time warner has a 40 per cent stake in gary 's set top device
that also takes out cnn
ge joins outpost in new venture which means nbc is out
disney joins outpost abc is out
outpost and newscorp in new deal fox is out
any of these places could have a mole
or all of 'em
it 's like a a continuous loop
we can go to some alternative press place that 1,000 people read get them and us killed
but anything big enough for this is a parent of or a subsidiary to something gary 's got a finger in
how close are you
what
he 's got 12 satellites up
he 's got dishes on top of 21
he 's building this -- mega network for skywire
let 's use it
we ca n't just assume they 're standing by to receive skywire 12 months from launch
i 'd have to write in an aglet
a what
it 's how on line services push logos they wanna sell you
you do n't ask for 'em they just appear
have to work on it somewhere besides my office or my house
and then the quality of the broadcast would n't exactly be digital that 's 12 months away
but they 'd still get the idea right
you 'd have to design a graphic interface to make the data pop
maybe some audio too
to tie it all in to gary
how long would that take you
it 's a standard gui
once i 've got a concept it 's maybe three day 's work
gary knows i 'm close on skywire
we have to do this fast
before they kill somebody else too
oh man
i 'd have to get into gary 's house
to get the satellite positions
you mean -- break in
i do n't know --
and what if the broadcast dishes on top of 21 are n't hot yet
you said the place is n't finished
why were you so careless
i thought the worst they would do is fire me
who knew they took termination so literally
why were you snooping in my office
oh
i liked you
i was checking you out
think everybody in this place is here the same reason we are
'cause their apartments might be bugged
i told teddy about you
what 'd he say
a beautiful geek
what 're the chances
same with the excerpts i 'm choosing they 'll play against any of the images you described
perfect
how am i gon na get away from the party long enough to --
you could always say you have to go the bathroom
that 's lame is n't it
you 'll come up with something
does he know you know
he suspects i know something
i think he was sort of -- explaining himself to me in case i do
we have to go in tonight
i 'm two hours from a beta version
but i 've got ta go home for an hour
why
she called to apologize
i said i was pulling an all nighter
she said then come home just to say hi
which i always do when we fight it 's suspicious if i do n't
please do n't go
at this point the worst thing i could do is anything out of the ordinary
meet me at the other location
tell me you 're not calling on your car phone
they know i had no choice
get out of the house now
do you have a laptop
it 's three years old it --
bring it to the other location
but you said the other --
maybe it 's the satellite
let 's try 2
... he knows
what
he 's been altering the coordinates since we logged on
he 's a step ahead
let 's jump to 12
latitude 47 degrees
wait a second
he knows i know
... you got my e mail
and your phone messages
you wanna do what you do it 's not a crime
is that how larry feels
uh
not exactly
but these like white supremacists trashed my office last week
what
they 're in the neighborhood
they usually hassle vietnamese grocers
jesus teddy
i 'm cool
they did n't touch the machine
or my disks
probably did n't know what they were
so you a moonie yet
milo
i met this girl
what
come on
is it serious
i do n't know
did you tell alice
no
i keep thinking it 'll go away
but there 's this -- connection
she 's been hacking since she was little she had to move around a lot
plus i see her every day we 're working on the same program
she 's -- beautiful
a beautiful geek
i do n't wanna sound paranoid or like a pig but what 're the chances
what d'you mean
i dunno
i guess larry 's got me totally suspicious of that place
what does that mean
milo geeks do n't have two girlfriends
most do n't have one
i did n't plan this
so -- how far are we from the campus
oh we 're not going to the campus
so how 'd you like the house
his snapples were in alphabetical order
well he micro managed the company till it got too big
guess he needs to micro manage something
every geek here 's got a thing for lisa
but that 's about the biggest reaction she 's had to anybody
she 's a programmer
heavy graphical background doing design interface for skywire apps
you 'll be working with her
i 've got a girlfriend remember
right
that 's rare around here
you know how nuns re married to jesus
posties are married to outpost
what 're they building
21
way behind schedule
it 's top- secret but everybody knows it 's a digital broadcast space
they see the dishes on top the fiber optics going in
gary 's not into fiber optics
he 's betting everything on the satellites
you wanna survive in the software business you cover your bets
i got ta say this is the weirdest car anybody ever requested
we tried the big vaporware number gary it 's no sale
can we buy into their ipo
or is that a justice dept
problem
there is no public offering
the guy who wrote it joined some freakazoid cult in san luis obispo
wrote this just to run their web site
maybe he 'll get back to work
speaking of which
yeah yeah
that kid 's the great white hope
i could get it out of him
you 're not listening
who 're these guys
where is he
we 're too late
take a look
fellas i 'm gon na have to ask you to leave here now
wait a second
i 'm the one who found out he was mucking around in here in the first place
we 're all grateful for that
really
go out the way you came in
you seem surprised to see me
i thought you 'd quit while you were ahead
what and watch all my earnings go
down the toilet
what do you want mr
cunningham was it
call me ritchie miss fagina
may i call you alotta
please
you may
your boss number two i understand that cat 's involved in big underground drills
virtucon 's main interest is in cable television but they do have a subterranean construction division yes
how did you know
i did n't baby you just told me
it 's for the mining industry mr. cunningham
we can talk about business later
but first let me slip into something more comfortable
behave
come in
i 'd rather talk about number two
do n't you like girls mr. cunningham
come in and i 'll show you everything you need to know
may i wash you
groovy
in japan men come first and women come second
or sometimes not at all
care for some saki
sak i it to me
how do you feel mr. cunningham
mmmm
i feel extreme relaxation
austin powers
hi i 'm andy warhol
hey how are you
hungry
here have this can of campbell 's tomato soup
i 'm going to paint this can of soup and become famous and not give you any credit for it
if you can become famous everyone will have their fifteen minutes of fame man
fifteen minutes of fame
i 'm going to use that quote and not give you any credit for that either
smashing
hello austin
this is basil exposition chief of british intelligence
you 're austin powers international man of mystery and you 're with agent mrs. kensington
the year is 1967 and you 're talking on a picture phone
we know all that exposition
i just wanted to be extremely clear so that everyone knows what 's going on at any given time
we 've just received word that dr. evil the ultimate square is planning to take over the world
dr. evil
i thought i put him in jail for good
i 'm afraid not
earlier this week dr. evil escaped from zedel edel prison in baaden baaden and now he 's planning a trap for you tonight at the electric psychedelic pussycat swinger 's club in picadilly circus here in swinging london
just where you 'd never think to look for him
we 'll be there
good luck austin
thank you
oh and austin
yes
be careful
thank you
let 's go baby
where am i
you 're in the ministry of defense
it 's 1997
you 've been cryogenically frozen for thirty years
who are these people
the shouting is a temporary side- effect of the unfreezing process
yes i 'm having trouble controlling
the volume of my voice
you might also experience a slight fever dry mouth and flatulence at moments of extreme relaxation
austin this is commander gilmour strategic command and general borschevsky russian intelligence
russian intelligence
are you mad
a lot 's happened since you were frozen austin
the cold war 's over
thank god
those capitalist dogs will finally pay for their crimes against the people hey comrades
we won austin
groovy
smashing
good on ya
nice tie
yea capitalism
when do i begin
immediately
you 'll be working with ms. kensington
you mean mrs. kensington
no austin mrs. kensington has long- since retired
ms. kensington is her daughter
vanessa 's one of our top agents
my god vanessa 's got a smashing body
i bet she shags like a minx
how do i tell them that because of the unfreezing process i have no inner monologue
i hope i did n't say that out loud just now
yes well
agent kensington will get you set up
she 's very dedicated
perhaps a little too dedicated
she 's got a bit of a bug up her ass
good luck austin the world 's depending on you
thank you exposition
oh and austin
yes
be careful
thanks
she 's working on another lead right now
then you 'll have to go it alone
good luck
thank you basil
oh and austin
yes
let me remind you that because of the unfreezing process you might experience flatulence at moments of extreme relaxation
oh yes
thank you
there 's one more thing austin
yes
be careful
thank you
hello exposition
austin vanessa let me bring you up to speed
dr. evil has high- jacked a nuclear warhead from kreplachistan and is holding the world ransom for one hundred billion dollars
if the world does n't pay up in four days he 's threatening to destroy the world
thank you exposition
only two things scare me and one is nuclear war
what 's the other
excuse me
what 's the other thing you 're scared of
carnies
what
circus folk
nomads you know
they smell like cabbage
indeed
if we could get back to the business at hand
it 's one thing to have a warhead it 's quite another thing to have the missiles to launch it
maybe these photographs are the last piece of that puzzle
i 've uncovered the details on project vulcan
it 's a new subterranean warhead delivery system
good god and underground missile
we 've long feared such a development
my god austin what have you done
that 's not your mother that 's a man
i 'm sorry basil i thought she was a man
damn it man
you 're talking about my mother
you must admit she is rather mannish
no offense but if that 's a woman it looks like she 's been beaten with an ugly stick
all right austin i think you should go
i think if everyone were honest they 'd confess that the lady looks exactly like a man in drag
i 'm leaving
oh and austin
yes basil
be careful
thanks
well austin you 've stopped dr. evil from destroying the world with his subterranean nuclear probe and somehow you and agent kensington managed to escape unscathed from his evil lair
i 'd say that about sums it up exposition
not quite actually
vanessa i have something for you
congratulations field agent kensington
austin i have something for you as well
here 's the number of my dentist he 's first rate
ring him up he 'll look after you
thanks basil
maybe the nineties are n't so bad after all
good afternoon mr. powers i 'm the destructacon 5000
i 'm programmed to prevent you from progressing beyond this point
you might as well surrender
resistance is futile
your odds of survival are 23,763,273 to
well destructacon 5000 you have quite a head on your shoulders i dare to coin
yes i am programmed to answer any question
really
let me ask you this
what is love
that does not compute
why not
it 's a question
love is
love is
love is
what 's wrong with your hand
do n't try to suck up to me
it 's a little late for that
i 'm a freak
look at it it 's been rendered useless
i 'm sorry baby i 'm just not grocking your head space
oh forget it
as a fellow player on the international stage mr. powers i 'm sure you 'll enjoy watching the curtain fall on the third and final act
dr. evil do you really expect them to pay
no mr. powers i expect them to die
even after they pay me the money i 'm still going to melt all the cities of the world with hot magma
all right guard begin the unnecessarily slow moving dipping mechanism
i 've got you dr. evil
well done mr. powers
we 're not so different you and i. it 's true you 're british and i 'm belgian
you have a full head of hair mine is slightly receding
you 're thin i 'm about forty pounds overweight
ok we are different i 'm not making a very good point
however is n't it ironic mr. powers that the very things you stand for-- swinging free love parties distrust of authority- are all now in the nineties considered to be
evil
maybe we have more in common than you care to admit
no man what we swingers were rebelling against were uptight squares like you whose bag was money and world domination
we were innocent man
if we 'd known the consequences of our sexual liberation we would have done things differently but the spirit would have remained the same
it 's freedom man
your freedom has cause more pain and suffering in the world than any plan i ever dreamed of
face it freedom failed
that 's why right now is a very groovy time man
we still have freedom but we also have responsibility
really there 's nothing more pathetic than an aging hipster
it seems the tables have turned again dr. evil
not really
kill the little bastard
see what i care
man you are one chilly square
mr. powers my job is to acclimate you to the nineties
you know a lot 's changed since 1967
well as long as people are still having promiscuous sex with many anonymous partners without protection while at the same time experimenting with mind expanding drugs in a consequence free environment i 'll be sound as a pound
my mother 's told me all about you
if it 's a lie goddamn her
it it 's the truth goddamn me
god i hope that 's witty
how 's your mum
my mother 's doing quite well thank you very much
ok ok man do n't get heavy i 'll sign
just to get things moving baby
listen mr. powers i look forward to working with you but do me a favor and stop calling me baby
you can address me as agent kensington
we have to leave immediately
we 've preserved your private jet just as you left it
it 's waiting at heathrow airport
my jumbo jet
smashing baby
you 've preserved my jag
smashing
yes we 've had it retrofitted with a secure cellular phone an on board computer and a global geosynchronous positioning device
oh and finally this
let me guess
the floss is garotte wire the toothpaste contains plastic explosives and the toothbrush is the detonation device
no actually
i do n't know how to put this really
well there have been fabulous advances in the field of dentistry
why
what 's wrong with my teeth
hey who put this in here
someone 's playing a prank on me
honestly this is n't mine
i 'm sure
i think i 'll give that stew a ding a- ling
i love las vegas man
oh i forgot my x ray glasses
here use mine
i 'm going to use a cover name
it 's important that it be a generic name so that we do n't draw attention to ourselves
i ca n't see a bloody thing
oh i forgot to tell you they 're prescription x ray glasses
i have very bad astigmatism
why did you leave so soon
that cat number two has an x ray eyepatch
i get bad vibes from him man
listen we should go back to the room but first i have to go to the naughty chair and see a man about a dog
good morning luv who are you on the phone with
do you want to talk to him
good morning vanessa
i hope you have on clean underwear
why
we 've got a doctor 's appointment-- an evil doctor 's appointment
let 's go get him
he 's too well protected right now
we ca n't just sit here austin
let me tell you a story
there 's these two bulls on top of a hill checking out some foxy cows in the meadow below
the young bull says hey why do n't we run down the hill and shag us a cow
and the wise old bull replies no why do n't we walk down the hill and shag all the cows
i do n't get it
well you know
cows and shagging
unfortunately while you told that stupid story dr. evil has escaped
no worries luv
we 'll just give basil a tinkle on the telling bone
i hate having my picture taken
you 're crazy
the camera loves you vanessa
fancy a nibble
i could n't have another bite
watch out you 're on my hair
sorry
move your hand to the left
there you go
gorgeous
go
just go
i have n't had fun like that since college
i 'm sorry
why
i 'm sorry that bug up your ass had to die
always wanting to have fun that 's you in a nutshell
no this is me in a nutshell
you 're smashed vanessa
i am not
oh yes you are
i 'm not
i 'm the sensible one
i 'm always the designated driver
i ca n't
you 're drunk
it 's not that i 'm drunk i 'm just beginning to see what my mum was talking about
what was my mother like back in the sixties
i 'm dying to know
she was very groovy
she was so in love with your dad
if there was one other cat in this world that could have loved your mum and treated her as well as you dad did it was me
but unfortunately for yours truly that train has sailed
hello luv
thirty years of political and social upheaval
the fall of the berlin wall a female prime minister of england the abolishment of apartheid a fascinating tapestry of human strum und drang
yeah i ca n't believe liberace was gay
women loved him man
i did n't see that one coming
basil was very concerned to know where you were last night
out and about doing odds and sods
i 'll tell him
by the way i 've decided we should keep our relationship strictly professional
since i 've been unfrozen i 've had a rancid taste in my mouth
do you have a piece of gum
do you think she 's prettier than i
who
you know who
no
do n't lay your hang ups on me vanessa
you 're being very trippy
i 'm looking at you and the whole time i ca n't help thinking you had your willie inside her hootchie kooch
austin we do n't look anything like our photo badges
do n't worry baby
i picked up a mind control technique during my travels to india
i learned it from my guru the late guru shastri a chaste man who mysteriously died of a disease that had all the hallmarks of syphilis
just watch me
watch me now
thank god austin we made it
yes act naturally and we 'll split this scene the way we came in vanessa
does that make you horny
not now austin
first i plan to soil myself
then i plan to regroup and think about the next move
any thoughts
sadly no
hold on
i always keep this on me just in case
all right i get it
i have bad teeth
you have to understand in britain in the sixties you could be a sex symbol and still have bad teeth
it did n't matter
no no no
we 'll use the floss to get to the ledge
smashing idea
give it to me
not a good time to lose one 's head
indeed
that 's not the way to get ahead in life
yes
it 's a shame he was n't more headstrong
shut up
fair enough
follow me
we 're going to have to jump over the rail
are you crazy
do n't worry
austin i 'm coming with you
i 'm going it alone this time vanessa
i have a follow up visit with the evil doctor
i 'll secure the perimeter
i have something to tell you
lay it on me
i love you austin
that 's fab because i love you too vanessa
kiss me
behave
danger powers personal effects
actually my name 's austin powers
it says here name danger powers
danger 's my middle name
ok austin danger powers one blue crushed velvet suit
one frilly lace cravat
one gold medallion with peace symbol
one pair of italian shoes
one pair of tie dyed socks purple
one vinyl recording album tom jones live at las vegas
one swedish made penis enlarger pump
that 's not mine
one credit card receipt for swedish- made penis enlarger pump signed austin powers
i 'm telling you baby that 's not mine
one warranty card for swedish made penis enlarger pump filled out by austin powers
i do n't even know what this is
this sort of thing ai n't my bag baby
one book swedish made penis enlarger pumps and me this sort of thing is my bag baby by austin powers
hi folks
you 're entering a restricted zone
can i see your security badges
sure
everything seems to be in order
hey wait a minute--
here have a piece of gum
here have a piece of gum
do n't mind if i do
hey
wait a minute that 's my last piece of gum
commander this is slater in sowest com three
we have a potential bogey with erratic vectoring and an unorthodox entry angle
is it one of ours
no
log com bird twelve says its metalurg recon analysis is a standard alloy not stealthy not carbon- composite
it does have an odd shape sir
what are you saying son
it appears to be in the shape of bob 's big boy sir
oh my god he 's back
in many ways bob 's big boy never left sir
he 's always offered the same high quality meals at competitive prices
shut up
should we scramble tachq for an intercept
what 's its current position
commander i have to log it
that 's a direct order
you did n't see a thing
but my design was perfect
your autonomic functions were shut down and even though your arm was n't frozen the aging was retarded therefore your right arm is only slightly older than the left
ca n't you see i 'm only half a man
look at me i 'm a freak
but dr. evil all you need to do is-- --work with this tennis ball
squeeze it for twenty minutes a day
a few months of that and it 'll be just as strong as the other arm
and look what you 've done to mr. bigglesworth
we could not anticipate feline complications due to the reanimation process&emdash
silence
ahhhhhhhhh
let this be a reminder to you all that this organization will not tolerate failure
we 've got a lot of work to do
someone help me
i 'm still alive only i 'm very badly burned
some of you i know some of you i 'm meeting for the first time
hello up there
anyone
can someone call an ambulance
i 'm in quite a lot of pain
you 've all been gathered here to form my evil cabinet
excuse me
austin powers is getting too close
he must be neutralized
any suggestions
ya wohl-- i mean yes wohl herr doctor
i have created the ultimate weapon to defeat austin powers
bring on the fembots
breathtaking frau
these automated strumpets are the perfect bait for the degenerate powers
these are the latest word in android replicant technology
lethal efficient brutal
and no man can resist their charms
send in the soldiers
quite impressive
thank you herr doctor
i like to see girls of that caliber
by caliber i mean both the barrel size of their guns and the high quality of their character
forget it
release the sharks
all the sharks have had laser beams attached to their heads
i figure every creature deserves a warm meal
dr. evil
yes what is it
you 're interrupting my moment of triumph
it 's about the sharks
since you were frozen they 've been placed on the endangered species list
we tried to get some but it will take months to clear up the red tape
right
mr. powers we 're going to lower you in a tank of piranhas with laser beams attached to their heads
what is it now
well we experimented with lasers but you would be surprised at how heavy they are
they actually outweighed the piranha themselves and the fish well they sank to the bottom and died
i have one simple request-- sharks with friggin laser beams attached to their heads and it ca n't be done
remind me again why i pay you people
what do we have
sea bass
right
they 're mutated sea bass
really
are they ill tempered
please allow me to demonstrate
that was great mr. keon dave
thank you
ok group we have two new member
say hello to scott and his father mr
ehville
evil actually doctor evil
no the boy 's right
i really am evil
do n't be so hard on yourself
you 're here that 's what 's important
a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step
actually the boy 's quite astute
i am trying to kill him
my evil associates have cautioned against it so here he is unfortunately alive
we 've heard from scott now let 's hear from you
the details of my life are quite inconsequential
that 's not true doctor
please tell us about your childhood
an evil vet
no
maybe like work in a petting zoo or something
an evil petting zoo
you always do that
anyways this is really hard because you know my dad is really evil
scott my boy come here
how was your day
well me and a buddy went to the video arcade in town and like they do n't speak english right and so my buddy gets into a fight and he goes hey quit hassling me cause i do n't speak french or whatever and the other guy goes something in paris talk and i go um just back off and he goes get out and i go make me
fascinating
what are your plans for this evening
thought i 'd stay in
there 's a good tittie movie on skinemax
and that 's how you want to live your life is it
yeah
what
scott i want you to meet daddy 's nemesis austin powers
why are you feeding him
why do n't you just kill him
in due time
but what if he escapes
why do n't you just shoot him
what are you waiting for
i have a better idea
i 'm going to put him in an easily escapable situation involving an overly- elaborate and exotic death
why do n't you just shoot him now
here i 'll get a gun
we 'll just shoot him
bang
dead
done
one more peep out of you and you 're grounded
let 's begin
fine
whatever
mutated ill tempered sea bass it is
come let 's return to dinner
close the tank
are n't you going to watch them
they 'll get away
no we 'll leave them alone and not actually witness them dying and we 'll just assume it all went to plan
i have a gun in my room
give me five seconds i 'll come back and blow their brains out
no scott
you just do n't get it do you
come everyone let us repair to the main chamber
project vulcan is about to begin
scott are you coming
i do n't want to
do n't you want to see what daddy does for a living
blow me
what did you say
show me
dad we just made a breakthrough in group
i had the group liquidated you little shit
they were insolent
i hate you
i hate you
i wish i was never artificially created in a lab
scott do n't say that
we also own the franklin mint which makes decorative hand painted theme plates for collectors
some plates like the gone with the wind series have gone up in value as much as two hundred and forty percent but as with any investment there is some risk involved
gentlemen i have a plan
it 's called blackmail
the royal family of britain are the wealthiest landowners in the world
either the royal family pays us an exorbitant amount of money or we make it look like prince charles the heir to the throne has had an affair outside of marriage and therefore they would have to divorce
um dr. evil prince charles did have an affair
he admitted it and they are now divorced actually
people have to tell me these things
i 've been frozen for thirty years throw me a bone here
ok no problem
here 's my second plan
back in the sixties i had a weather changing machine that was in essence a sophisticated heat beam which we called a laser
using this laser we punch a hole in the protective layer around the earth which we scientists call the ozone layer
slowly but surely ultraviolet rays would pour in increasing the risk of skin cancer
that is unless the world pays us a hefty ransom
virtucon alone makes over nine billion dollars a year
oh really
one hundred billion dollars
ok make it happen
anything else
oh hello vanessa
how was the flight
great
how 's austin
he 's asleep
you did n't
oh god no i made him sleep on the couch
i 'm proud of you
why
because you managed to resist austin power 's charms
well god knows he tried but i 've been rather firm with him mummy
you did n't tell me he was so obsessed with sex
it 's bizarre
you ca n't judge him by modern standards
he 's very much a product of his times
in my day he could have any woman he wanted
what about his teeth
you have to understand in britain in the sixties you could be a sex symbol and still have bad teeth
it did n't matter
i just do n't see it
just wait
once austin gets you in his charms it 's impossible to get out
did you ever
of course not
i was married to your father
did you ever want to
austin is very charming very debonair
he 's handsome witty has a knowledge of fine wines sophisticated a world renowned photographer
women want him men want to be him
he 's a lover of love-- every bit an international man of mystery
you did n't answer my question mum
i know
let me just say this austin was the most loyal and caring friend i ever had
no it 's been too long
best to leave things alone
i 'm on with a friend
look i 'd better go
i love you
i love you vanessa
so scott why do n't we start with you
why are you here
well it 's kind of weird
we do n't judge here
ok
well i just really met my dad for the first time three days ago
he was partially frozen for thirty years
i never knew him growing up
he comes back and now he wants me to take over the family business
and how do you feel about that
i do n't wanna take over the family business
what do you want to do scott
i do n't know
i was thinking maybe i 'd be a vet or something cause i like animals and stuff
we 're not yet open for business i 'm afraid
shame
i was recommended
by a friend
really
sir august merryweather
i was looking for something relaxing
say a tuscan hillside in june
normally we 'd be eager to oblige --
seriously
of course
natural weather delivered to your door on demand
down your phoneline
for limited periods
you do n't say
how real does it feel
as real as you wish
hot or cold
humid or dry
anything you like
within reason
there are limits
the technology is brand new
soon it will be more powerful
we anticipate a huge demand
leave us your number
we 'll be in touch
no need
i 'll call again
i want you to say the first thing that comes into your head when i say these words
do you understand
blue
... bottle
red
... head
knight
black
... death
love
... death
flower
... power
nature
... preserve
secret
... love
hope
... love
fear
... love
peter
how long have i been here
three days
he said if it vanished he 'd know it was
you who betrayed him
he took a huge risk
the ultimate test
so i 'm still
would that i could say the same
ah but you have n't see the real me
watch closely
you
have we met
you mean you do n't recall
ah beautiful
just as he promised
promised
who promised
there look
mrs. peel
come quickly
brolly 's been betrayed
i 'll tell you everything
the weather 's getting worse and worse
they 're after me
coming for me
come quickly
sir august
what now
may i help you madam
mr. john steed please
i 'm afraid that 's impossible
impossible
you are female
as you see
then you ca n't come in
i have an appointment
no women
not in boodles
not since 1922
really -- what happened in 1922
sir august
sir august
eh
in here
quite a collection
if nature gives a man a collector 's mind it does n't matter what he collects
butterflies
old china
penny farthings
a true collector grows more obsessive as the years pass
your voice -- it 's so familiar
we have met
my number two
special assignments
she 's --
let me guess -- father
how curious
something strange is happening
and whoever knows about it does n't want us to find out
father will be your controller
steed here will show you the ropes
ropes
welcome to mobile h.q. weather 's turning quite nasty
sir august was blown to smithereens
along with half of banffshire
the ministry 's worried
he tried to warn us
would it be possible to use it for military purposes
directed by laser
bounced by satellite
quite possible
london
the world council of ministers meets soon on global defence
if you can control the weather you control the world
after the cold war
i resign
you need treatment mrs. peel
you ca n't resign
watch me
what are you trying to do to me
we want to help
i thought i was a widow
my husband
the only man i ever loved
is dead
for the rest of my life i have to live with that
the death of peter peel was a great loss
to us all
to you
this is an official matter mrs. peel
no need to take it personally
where are you going
to find out who killed my husband
the doors and walls are monitored mrs. peel
this is a very secure establishment
so am i.
about your next assignment mrs. peel
next assignment
ahem
as i was saying perhaps another macaroon
thank you steed
good luck
peter
emma
thanks valentine
you
darling emma -- yes we the true genius behind the prospero project
a slight miscalculation -- my face was burned beyond recognition
fortunately my research into plastics came in handy
dr. darling peter
all you
an unholy trinity
you killed my husband
for starters
of course i had to kill the teddy bears as well
too many cooks --
spoil the majority shareholders
in wonderland weather
i planned everything even the ministry recruiting you
but i found you
all the clues led me here
of course
i planned that too
but -- why
you disappoint me emma
ca n't you guess
for you
it was all for you
our revels now are ended
oh no emma
they 've only just begun
think of this as your second wedding feast
i 'm already married
come come you 're a widow -- a most attractive widow
now i think of it we 'll need a bridesmaid
here
you know i believe she 's actually jealous
valentine listen to me
right bridesmaid
now what have i left out
oh yes i know the ring
ring
the missing piece of the jigsaw
i tried to get you to give it to me as peter i tried to steal it from you as dr. darling
as myself i 'll be a bit less subtle
with this ring my plan will be complete
how wagnerian
do you mean to say you 've waited all these years because you could n't create a chip on your own
that would have amused peter
speaking of peter there 's more good news you wo n't even have to change your last name
you 'll always be mrs. peel
what are my choices
choices
i 'll never marry you
doctor peel i presume
and you must be steed
please do n't get up
i was about to throw in the towel
i had a spot of bother at the door
i should n't wonder
not a woman inside boodles since --
1922
why the kippers
red herring would have been too obvious do n't you think
so what was all this -- some sort of test
congratulations you 've penetrated a bastion of male privilege
i guessed you were n't a stickler for tradition doctor
whereas you are
dyed in the wool
but i can admire someone who does n't play by the rules
rules are made to be broken
not by me
play by the rules doctor or the game is nothing
and just what is the game
i say this is all terribly formal
must i go an calling you dr. peel
under the circumstances you may call me mrs. peel
much better
and now that we 've settled the matter of honorifics will you kindly explain why you wished me to meet you
i did n't
mother did
mother
... showers followed by sunny periods
we 're not here to talk about the weather surely
ah
from trubshaw 's
my shoemaker
a kipper
or a red herring
what were they investigating
my father always wanted a boy
really
i fail to see the connection
i had a feeling you would
touche
do you
yes indeed
i need protection
i thought we were on our way
oh absolutely but trubshaw 's a man worth meeting
no point setting out half shod
or half cocked
that place is so absurd so out of date
do you really think so
you know what i mean
this car -- and you
nobody walks around like that
milk
not all tradition is bad mrs. peel
no thank you
but why
what 's the point
a gentleman has to have a code
this is part of mine
a uniform
think of it as my suit of shining armor
and i suppose you 're the knight
the most unpredictable piece on the board
and always ready to protect his queen
that 's predictable
when i find a queen in need of protection i 'll let you know
sir august merryweather
why are we seeing him first
as per mother 's instructions
do we always follow mother 's instructions
for a man in my position --
just what is your position if you do n't mind my asking
how did a stuffed shirt like you get into this line of work
they call me in when they 've reached a dead end
freelance
like yourself
i have no choice
why should you risk your life
after our fencing match i was rather hoping you would do the risking
more tea
no thanks
i meant me
according to mother sir august owns half of the highlands
a millionaire
former head of special projects at the ministry
now
an eccentric recluse
not so much eccentric
more barking mad
he has a wife called june
and a daughter somewhere -- julie
june july
august
the family does seem to be somewhat meteorologically inclined
any other vices
all of a piece really
a fanatical weatherman
chairman of brolly
british royal organisation for lasting liquid years
thinks british weather has been tampered with by
aliens
so
i distract him while you snoop around
how
small talk
try the weather
ah brenda
mrs. peel
you should be dead
how do you feel
strange
you were very lucky
four shots to the heart
i found you after i slipped away from sir august
mother brought you here
not me you should thank
i was n't about to
i mean your man trubshaw
your bullet proof waistcoat
i thought you were just overdressed
i might say the same
i must say you look more your old self --
you mean my other self
either way
may i ask why you dress in that fashion
i should have thought that was obvious
i 'm in mourning
colonel crabtree
international satellite systems
formerly of the ministry
how on earth can you tell
elementary mrs. peel
trubshaw is n't the only shoemaker still practicing his trade
very good steed
what on earth
any ideas
well he was a fellow of the royal zoological society
is that written in his shoe
common knowledge mrs. peel
she had this in her mouth
there there
for you mrs. peel
thanks
i see what you mean about letting me do the risking
hello
but
do n't bother
here 's a bus
not quite
this is my field
is there anything that is n't
the prospero project was started by my husband
it was an early attempt to solve the problems of global warming
in theory climate engineering is entirely feasible
we thought of injecting a chemical cocktail into the atmosphere by laser and satellite
a quick fix
filling in mother nature 's blind spots
exactly
there 'd been earlier attempts to pump carbon dioxide into deep sea
propane gas mostly
in small quantities it captures chlorine
protects the ozone layer
but it proved impractical
too bulky
but if someone miniaturized the process
that 's what we were working on
sounds as if someone 's hijacked your research
three agents killed by bad weather
... and by you mrs. peel
then a mad millionaire
head of a secret defense establishment
a group of eccentrics obsessed by weather
... and by you mrs. peel
everything points to you
no sisters
no undiscovered twin
not that i know of
explanation
according to dr. darling you 're a psychopathic personality with schizophrenic delusions suffering from recurring amnesia based on traumatic repression leading to outbursts of anti social and violent behavior
q.e.d.
what lady disdain
are you yet breathing
barely
you will let me know if you find that queen who 's in need of protection wo n't you
this must be the last straw
here 's the one that broke the camel 's back
someone did n't want us to get to the party
i expect we 'll have to gatecrash
steed
mrs. peel
where am i
the winslow home for retired lepidoptorists
i 'm so sorry i struck you mrs. peel
please forgive me
i thought you were someone else
was i
i expect that 's for you to know and me to find out
it was peter -- i saw him
you followed me
orders
to kill me
nothing personal
i could save you the trouble
no trouble
because you always obey orders
always
except
yes
... when i do n't
it comes down to one thing mrs. peel
trust
and do you trust me
i could be convinced if
i knew who poisoned me in the maze
that kiss
it was n't me you have my word
no after you
you do n't trust me
as far as you trust me
i told mother i took care of you
you lied
i equivocated
but you 're not their big worry at present
it 's dr. darling he 's disappeared
drat
someone wants to implicate you in this affair mrs. peel
any idea who
no idea who
no idea why
teddy bears cuckoo clocks toys all children 's things
... or grown ups who still like to be children
quite
any childhood friends
enemies
not to speak of
peter and i were both loners
there was nobody
very well
i have a friend who might be of assistance
he 's at the ministry
we 'd better be careful
i 'm a wanted woman i know
his name 's jones
invisible jones
why 's he called invisible
you 'll find out
are n't you coming
i 'll catch you up
do n't worry he 's expecting you
we must hurry mrs. peel
hurry
what for
i 'm just now --
you did n't tell her
there 's a reception this evening
colonel jones thinks it advisable we attend
have we been invited
trubshaw again
what now
snuff
i must insist you try some
they 're playing your song mrs. peel
the merry widow
i might have known
where 's the reception
bad news
father 's looking for you
where are those bloody ministers
have a look at this
i 'll be back
where are you going
laying in supplies mrs. peel weather may get very nasty and i 've no umbrella
you need n't bother
i ca n't drag you further into this
after all i am still the chief suspect
no bother
mother and father think i 've joined you
i might as well
but --
oh and by the way i think it 's about time you got rid of that chip on your shoulder
if you 'd been through what i have you would n't --
mrs. peel
what kept you
the plot
hello we must be going
the owl and the pussycat went to sea
in a beautiful pea green boat
a fine night mrs. peel
still a bit chilly
english weather
you know after all we 've been through i should say we deserve a long holiday
have you any place in mind
as a matter of fact i have
i do n't recall siberia being this warm steed
it 's the latest thing mrs. peel
our little paradise -- just made for two
not quite
our chaperon
pity your mother came too
think of it as special assignment mrs. peel
with a twist
you 're our chief suspect
you 're saying i have no choice
where 's mother
mobile hq
in a blue funk
ca n't take chances
i 'm looking after things while he 's hiding out
you do n't believe him
it 's mother you have to convince
he 's very agitated
wait here
emma in wonderland
welcome mrs. peel
we 've been expecting you
we hope you 'll enjoy your stay with us
decontamination is almost complete
decontamination --
and you 've a new wardrobe
he does want you to look attractive
he tells me you 're very beautiful
talk to the pipe mrs. peel
that usually helps
do n't worry about me being invisible
other than that i 'm perfectly normal
i see
or rather you do n't
learnt the tricks in camouflage
till this accident made a prang of things
how can i help you mrs. peel
ah here we are
steed asked me to play a hunch valentine peel
peter 's brother
but --
half brother to be precise
now let 's see
eton cambridge
research into robotics and plastics
overtaken by peter 's work on the physics of climate change
i know all this
do you also know that during your final experiment your halfbrother- in law was under surveillance
surveillance
by whom
father
she gave him an all clear after a security test by dr. darling
who 's now vanished
makes two of us
are you suggesting that dr. darling and valentine were somehow in this together
but that 's absurd
i was getting to it
getting to what
the world council of ministers meets tomorrow to convene the new global defense initiative --
i fail to see --
privately owned by
let me guess wonderland weather
very good mrs. peel
i shall need a small plane
you 're not venturing alone surely
i 'm going to find out who killed my husband
will you take these documents to steed
a series of bizarre shifts in local weather patterns
global warming
jungle plants in the arctic
a lush english village transformed overnight into african scrubland
blizzards in summer
we know one thing
that suspect was not mrs. peel
so you say
oh hello
we want mrs. peel
dead i 'm afraid
steed
how did you guess
you reek of mrs. peel 's black leather
it was you who gave valentine peel his security clearance
you 're the mole who betrayed the ministry
mother betrayed me
she was going to replace me with a younger father
errand boy that 's all i was
find steed
well you found me
have a sniff of this why do n't you
careful the scent can be overpowering
mother
i thought you were burglars
brenda and i thought we 'd drop in
weather 's turning nasty
you did n't come to talk about the weather surely
oh yes i did
i want you to meet somebody
i expect you 'll like her
something went wrong
system malfunction
explosion
mrs. peel had a narrow escape
suspected sabotage
nothing proven
file still open
how come you took so much interest in her dr. darling
still does n't
better safe than sorry
she was in a dangerous game steed
high stakes
she may prove to be a risk
if she is there 's only one solution
termination
anyone particular in mind
you
we had a lead to wonderland weather but we got there too late
someone tipped them off
too late anyway
today 's escapade was only for starters
this is no ordinary weather
it 's manmade
a kind of weather bomb
impossible
this man -- did you see him
no
her husband she says
alice tried to warn us
a trap
tell mother beware
tell father that 's all
you 're accusing mrs. peel of killing her own husband
her husband suspected someone very close to the operation
on the day he died he was setting a test
to prove to himself -- to us that his wife was beyond suspicion
he had to be certain
he said he was going to give mrs. peel something
pity
i was growing fond of mrs. peel
unfortunately --
guilty until proven innocent
mother and father know best
i was hoping you could tell me
you 're getting yourself into terrible trouble my son
weather 's turning very nasty -- and so am i.
i 'm going to follow up on a hunch of my own
if i 'm right mrs. peel is innocent and you have a mole
where
in your operation
i 'm warning you for the last time steed whoever 's behind all this looks like mrs. peel walks like mrs. peel and kills like mrs. peel
are you alright young man
i think so thank you so much
wonderland weather ltd.
this way
mrs. peel --
ask not for whom the telephone rings
no please
i beg you
walk over to the window
let it be rain please let it be --
stay by the window
by the window
john steed
valentine peel
i see you 've gone back to using your original face
the last one you 'll ever see
perish the thought
you 're better than i expected
i was at harrow
but did they teach you this
bang bang
you 're dead
you wish
one shot -- for emergencies
that 's not playing by the rules
rules are made to be broken
if you say so
i do
you said
one shot
did i
my mistake
are n't you forgetting about something
you are and it 's behind you
come come
you do n't really expect me to fall for --
does cole know about this
really -- you went with him for two years
i 'm totally blown away
you 're getting married
it seems like only yesterday i showed you how to have oral sex
deb i want to throw you a shower
look at that guy
what a hunk
check out the other guy 's buns
debbie
i do n't believe it
i 'm so excited
bobbie what are you talking about
o'neill just tole me
it 's sooo great
i do n't believe it
he still thinks i 'm going with him
i 'm going to break the news to him tomorrow
he 's not gon na be happy
and your parents ca n't be too thrilled either
no
as far as they 're concerned the only good rick is a dead rick
but i do n't care
it 's my decision
what do you think 's gon na go on at the guys party
they 'll probably get drunk and watch dirty movies
but do n't worry about the dirty movies
what do you mean
i forgot to tell you
yesterday i found a bunch of pornos in the back seat of o'neill 's car
you 're kidding
nah
everything 's cool
i took care of 'em
that 's what we 're going to find out
i feel like i 'm spying on rick
deb we 're pretending to be hookers
right in here
the big show starts in one minute
yeah man
let 's throw a bachelor party with drugs booze and broads
yeah
right
all the things that make life worth living
where 's the women man
we got ta have women
chulo one thing at a time
sex is my one thing
i 'm good at it
i do n't get it but at least gary 's got the real stuff coming up here in a few minutes
women
hey you guys what 's going on
we 're going for a little liquid refreshment
great
i 'll go with you
wait a second
hey raul
move that car will you
i 've decided not to run for president
too bad man that blows my chance to be ambassador to france
man you 're losing your audience
okay
this is it
i 'm getting married
yes gentlemen
saturday after next i lose my amateur standing and turn pro
hey man congratulations
you sure gary 's got this whole party deal together
yeah man he 's got us a great room at the hotel and lots of chicks
i hope so
hundred bucks apiece is a lot of dinero
what time are we supposed to get to the hotel
and
bond
james bond
cole
do n't you know it 's bad luck to see the groom before the wedding
i want debbie
cole
you dump her and i 'll give you cash
what 's debbie 's blue book value right now
five thousand dollars
no
seventy five hundred
not interested
okay ten thousand plus a g.e. toaster oven a litton microwave a cuisinart
i 'm marrying debbie
michelin tires
brand new
a set of sears best metric tools
what is this person 's story here
thanks dad
cole go away
he 's gon na hurt you debbie
he 'll never be true to you the way i would
thank you
we 'll all keep that in mind
bye now
rick i want to talk to you
ah cole
i do n't remember ordering an asshole from room service
i do n't want any trouble
oh come on just a little
i 'm ready to make you another deal
ooh be still my heart
see that down there
that 's my most prized possession
my new porsche
great car
the best
i love that car
i 'm very happy for you two
i 'll trade you my porsche for debbie
an even swap
the car for debbie
i mean it
the car is yours
dump debbie
gee guys what should i do
the car or debbie
rick
debbie is mine
she 'll always be
cole when was the last time you had a lobotomy
you 've had it
i 'm gon na get you
cole what the hell are you doing
she 's mine
he and debbie stand outside the theater which is a multi plex cinema
fourteen movie theaters under one roof
prominent is a sign which reads 24 hour 3d festival
cole drags debbie into one of the theaters
the gang runs up to the theaters
fan out and look for them
hello
mr. thomerson
yes son did you find out where the bachelor party is
yes i did
fine
how 's everything going
not so good
he would n't listen to reason
he stole my car
my porsche
i ca n't find it anywhere
hi everybody
am i late
not at all
we 're just finishing lunch
so cole you been practicing your game
sure have
nice shot
thank you sir
i know you 're as unhappy as i am about debbie 's marriage to rick
yes sir i am
cole i do n't want you to give up on her
i 've tried to change her mind
it 's not her mind you need to change
it 's disneyland head in there
but how can i do that
if it were me i 'd reason with him first
then if that failed
i 'd take more persuasive action
thanks for the advise sir
keep me informed
cole my god boy what are you doing here
what happened
the bachelor party 's upstairs
they made me get naked
they hung me from the window so high up it was so scary i fell down
take hold of yourself
what room are they in
1002
all right i 'll go up there and take care of this myself
you look awful son
go find yourself some clothes
yes sir
cole
over here deb
in the smokehouse
cole we 've got to talk
finally realized rick 's a jerk huh
no cole i
it 's all right i forgive you
i 'm not the vengeful type
we 'll forget what happened
why do n't we take a trip together
maybe kill a few lions in kenya over christmas
cole listen to me
i 've got to tell you
you know when you dumped me for that wimp i thought cole she 'll be back
god wants the two of you to be together and sure enough
cole i 'm marrying rick
you 're marrying him
then why are you coming back to me
i 'm not
i just thought i should tell you myself before you heard it somewhere else
you know how that makes me feel deb
wanta know how that makes me feel
angry deb
yesss that 's the word angry
but if he makes you happy you go right ahead
i want you to be happy deb
no matter what no matter how angry it makes me no matter how much it hurts
be happy deb
be oh so very very happy
cole i 'm sorry i
that 's all right deb
go be happy and smile a lot deb
do it for me
i 'm going now cole
i understand deb
bye
be happy
god you 're a slob
but a fabulous cook
what are we having
it 's either meatloaf swiss steak or charred flesh
i wo n't know till it 's finished
i think your dinner 's burning
do n't worry
it 's supposed to do this
want to hear something great
bobbie and phoebe are throwing me a shower
it 's really gon na be fun
not as much fun as the bachelor party the guys are throwing for me
you 're going to have a bachelor party
of course
i 'm a traditional guy
it 's a traditional event
well what do you think
it looks awful
yes but looks are deceiving
not in this case however
are you going to have women at your party
no sweetheart it 's a stag party
does stay home
i 'm not talking about does
i 'm talking about hookers
oh those
why do you ask
because from what i 've heard it 's a tradition and you 're a traditional guy
huh
wha
i ca n't sleep
oh
i got something for that
stop fooling around
i need to talk
what 's the matter
i do n't know
i just feel scared
about what
the wedding my parents your family our friends my job the future our relationship the caterers my gown your tuxedo our honeymoon the apartment my shower your bachelor party
i think the only think you 've left out are our relations with the soviet union
sweetheart everything 's gon na be all right
before or after i have my nervous breakfown
c'mere
this is it lady
last stop
ca n't i just go with you guys
sorry we got men 's business to do
it 's no place for a lady
remember you promised
no screwing around
did i promise that
i do n't remember that
you 're really pissing me off
okay i promise
i swear on my mother 's grave
your mother 's not dead
well if i go back on my word i 'll kill her
have a good time
do n't make it too late
anything you say ma'am
have a fun shower
use soap
i love you
do n't turn on the lights sugar
i 'll lead you around
how wonderful
a seeing eye hooker
why do n't you get undressed
i ca n't trust you
c'mon i knew it was you
rick you 're lying
let go of me
debbie i 'm telling you i did n't do anything hardly
the marriage is off
now you can screw around with your friends for the rest of your life
i do n't want that
i want to be with you
and i want to be with someone who understands the meaning of the word commitment
i am committed
i love you
i do n't believe you
you do n't believe me
okay fine
if i were you i 'd worry less about the shower and more about rick 's bachelor party
ilene why would i want to do that
i trust rick
of course you do
i trusted my ex mel too
cousin i can only talk from experience
what do you think they do at these parties have tea and play scrabble
ilene rick promised
debbie do n't be naive
men are pigs
are you sure this is a good idea
look you heard what those hookers said
they were supposed to go to a bachelor party
that does n't mean it was rick 's party
debbie men are pigs -- if they can have women we can have men
let 's go
look girls -- i 'll stay behind and hold them off
the rest of you break for it
ilene are you crazy
i know what i 'm doing
go
i 'm using the same caterer for the shower i had for our christmas party last year
great mom
why is cole here
you know your father enjoys his company
a strange wang right in my palm
ilene we do n't really know that
what kind of job
i 'm a housewife
quiet mother
i hope ilene 's all right
i hope those guys are all right
great bathing suit
i think i screwed that one once
thanks for helping us out ed
we appreciate it
any time al
so we want your best girls the cream of your crop
let 's see your bread
park view hotel room 1002
they 'll be up there in a half hour
okay
nice to meet you both
jumbo where the hell are the women
what are you talking about asshole
your whores never showed up
they left an hour ago pink nuts
screw you
that 's it prick lips
what are you
i 've had it numb nuts
how much money you got
why
because i 'm pissed off
now give me your cash
this is bad public relations
i was planning to do a lot of business with you
but now i 'm going to have to go elsewhere
hey
i 'm sorry
you want girls
i 'll give you girls
give him the works
that 's more like it
okay
we 're all here
rick what 's the big announcement
all right gentlemen i 'm not gon na sugar coat this thing
i 've known you guys since grade school so i 'm gon na give it to you straight from the hip
right from the shoulder
without beating around the bush
nothing fancy just the plain hard facts
tell it like it is
wait a minute
you been living with debbie
why do you want to get married
because i love her
what can i tell you
sounds swell
i 'm really touched
and my getting married 's not gon na change a thing between me and my pals
we 're still gon na go bowling on tuesdays play cards on fridays and wear women 's clothes on sunday night
i love you guys
i always will
let 's have a toast
give the guy air
everyone to a neutral corner
what 's going on
it 's true
this place should have been wall to wall tits by now
guy paints a beautiful picture
i 'm going to see what the hell happened
looks like the only one who got screwed here was you
screw that
hookers beat you up
yes
i did n't know you were into that
gary how we doing big stallion
rick i really think i 'm in love
this is cause for celebration
she 'll probably charge half price for sex from now on
what can i be doing for you
you 're a pimp
i 'm telling you i am joe
i want women
that i got
very good women
they sit on your face anything you want
i 'll take some
big problem now
soon they go to customers
i need them for a bachelor party at the park view hotel
you are being in luck
customers in same hotel
i let you have them at cut rate price for 45 minutes
sold
45 minutes
no problem
not one minute longer or milt will come for you
milt
is that all the coke in the place
that 's it
good
you want to share it
naw two on a quaalude
bad luck
right
my marriage is the worst
all crap
a big pile of shit
maybe your marriage should lay off grains for a while
she hates me
it 's over
you 'll see as soon as you get married everything changes
you sure you want to go through with it man
what do you mean it changes
guys i think i 'd rather stay here
c'mon larry
be good for you
i just want to be alone
all right
now there 's milk and cookies in the refrigerator
go to bed right after falcon crest
lar
sometimes when people are mad they say things they do n't mean
no she hates me
i want to end everything here
now
you okay
yeah i guess so
really
yeah
i see you 're right
c'mon let 's party
what the hell are you doing
i 'm trying to slash my wrists
you 're trying to kill yourself with an electric razor
i could n't find any razor blades
well this is terrific
now you 're gon na have wrists that are smooth and kissable
just go out there
forget about everything and laugh it up
ha ha ha
no have fun first
then laugh
now forget about marriage for a while
go party
hi guys
we brought back a friend
it 's bullwinkle
it 's on the tenth floor
what do you know they moved it
catch you later
keep your voices down
this is a respectable establishment
we do n't go for any funny business here
just then a guy with a moosehead beer hat and two guys in a moose costume pass him and enter the elevator with the boys
i see what you mean
you 're a beautiful guy
and you 're doing a damn good job
you 're all under arrest
open up
your attention please
may i be the first to say it 's a raid
oops
all right who serves
rick hit the ball easier son
you do n't have to kill it
ca n't i just maim it a little
well i have to admit my game 's a little rusty but i love polo
it 's unrelenting a constant challenge to the senses
really a beautiful experience
rick i want to cut through the b.s
i 'd love that
good
i think you 're an asshole
no let me correct that an immature asshole
which is fine except you 're marrying my daughter and i 'm afraid my grandchildren are going to be little assholes
mr. thomerson i
let me finish
debbie 's an adult
she can do what she wants
but if you want your marriage to last you 're going to have to change some things about yourself
if i may make some suggestions
feel free
first you 're a slob
you have to dress for success
second your outlook on life
welcome welcome one and all
rick
oh no
the end
no sob story is going to change my mind
girls why do n't we go inside for lunch
boys would you mind bringing in that lemonade
in a second
and you 're irresponsible
show some initiative try to better yourself stop showing off actions speak louder than words
the thought of that person marrying my daughter makes me want to upchuck
you can tell a man by his friends
ed
you 're kinky
the phone made me do it
you 've been having strange sex
no brett i
it 's all right
so have i.
how are we doing
my name is o'neill
and you are
klupner
mrs. klupner
mrs.
i 'm separated
then there is a god
why do n't we take that baby picture
i 'm getting one heck of a glare off your dress there
could you undo a few buttons
of course
where 'd she go
she probably had sex scheduled for 12:30
o'neill let 's pick up the guys for a drink
i have major news to announce
where the hell is he
knowing larry he probably missed the flight
what 's the matter
nothing
let 's get crazy
do n't you love it when old friends stop by
hey i 'm starved
let 's go get something to eat
we 'll bring back food for everybody
i 'm not really hungry
c'mon
i insist
what the hell is that
my gift to you
under the table
the best table in the house
i think you 'll enjoy this table
so long father
i do n't get it
why did n't you go for it just now
i do n't know
maybe it 's because i love debbie or maybe it 's hard for me to get off in a place that smells like egg salad
i 'm not sure
rick i 'm concerned
about what
this is your bachelor party
you have n't had sex with anyone yet
get a few drinks into me we 'll dance and see what happens
i got something you ca n't resist
i have a friend tracey
she wants to meet you
she loves to please
oooooo
right in there pal
if i 'm not out in a half hour send for the paramedics
that 's the old rick
how 'd it go
put it to you this way -- you 're gon na have to pry her out of the bed with a spatula mister
i 'm proud of you lad
who was that
i do n't know
what 's this
got me
how 'bout this
still drawing a blank
hey you guys
who 's your friend
how about this a trojan donkey
and here 's mike 's partner in more ways than one
a gal who does n't think happiness ends with primates
the very lovely miss desiree
what are you going to do about it
what can i do
i 'm dead
debbie 's going to go crazy and end the whole thing
i 'll stop him
you stall him
reach out and snort someone
i 'm saved
let 's party
guess who 's here
another surprise guest
who
debbie
my debbie
what 's with her costume
i do n't know
go up to her make like you do n't know her and send her into the other bedroom
you got it
you always were sneaky stan very sneaky
rick marriage will be good for you
it 's done wonders for me
true you 're a lot handsomer now
do n't you have enough blood already
you wo n't miss a thing about being single
the wild parties the different girls every night running around like a maniac
god i miss that
stan you 're depressing me
hey i did n't know you were going to fill er up
just take a couple of gallons okay
that 's an even trade
a cotton ball for all my blood
okay rick all finished
i ca n't wait for that bachelor party
i need the action
oh
it 's
er
the guys from the beer convention
we 're bringing them to the party
great
i was wondering how do you guys go to the bathroom in that thing
you 're late again rick
i know sister but i have a very good excuse
there can be no excuse for tardiness
you 're absolutely right
i should never have stopped to save that drowning infant
i 'm just weak sister i 'm so weak
sister do you ever get lonely after vespers
if you do why do n't you give me a call
i 'm in the book
get going rick
you 're late enough as it is
right
think it over
how the hell are we supposed to get this donkey inside
i do n't know
what
i thought you told me you had it all figured out
maybe i did
i do n't remember
i 'd love to get you in an operating room
just once
can you believe how perfect it fits
yeah
who 'd have thought they 'd both be a size 138 regular
oh these moments do try me
be gentle
wash it to the windows
no we 'll hit the son of a bitch head on
it 's gon na flash stevie
we got ta get behind it
nah listen to it
it 's a pussy
it 'll just steam on us
it wo n't flash
go high in the ceiling
that 's franny
she likes firemen
tim fill out the alarm card
clean the pipe poles wipe down the ladders and hang some hose
biggest in two battalions
we 're gon na be okay man
adcox go with pengelly and check the other side
it is n't safe man
do n't go splittin us up
not with this one
-- what the hell 's the matter with you
you always check the other side
i have n't got time for bullshit right now okay
we got a job here
let me take the lead stephen
goddamn it adcox
just do your fucking job
aw man stephen listen to me
-- what the fuck were you thinking huh
burning people
you 're a fireman
they were killing firemen man
when sally showed me what was in swayzak 's files
they were my friends i had to do it
i had to do it for the department
-- knock it off
-- you ca n't let him turn you against your friends man --
... what do you want me to do stephen
talk to me
what am i supposed to do
there 's a fire
we 've got a job here
let 's get on with it
you stupid son of a bitch
what the fuck are you doing
stevie
i
hey baby mccaffrey
first one 's the clincher
you did okay
my lt
might have something to say about that
ah everybody screws up some brian
you 're working for the toughest lt
on the job
saw him once pick up a probie he thought was moving too slow and throw him into a burning building
it 's just bad luck you 're family
john when you 're in there
in the fire
do you ever see
is he
he 's alive
-- he killed people --
-- you know what swayzak would do to the department if this got out
--
-- stephen this is bullshit --
-- what he would do to your dad 's department
you got ta let me finish it --
it does n't go like that
who asked you
if you do it like that it 'll open in the fire
then you 'll get burned and die
well look what we have here
nice costume
rent it
i want to thank you for coming to my graduation stephen
it was a great inspiration to me
so you 're going to fight fires now huh
does n't work on you
see ya around little brother
not likely
well see you 're wrong already
had a talk with chief fitzgerald and we decided in the interest of brotherly love that maybe you should n't be way over on the other side of town
so starting tomorrow your assigned to company 17
my company
one case of scotch you 're getting cheap in your old age brian
i like what you 've done with the place
it 's comin along
want a beer
been ripping off fire stations
it 's old stuff adcox gave me that the department was going to throw out anyway
still good enough though for this tub
my god an actual operating 8-track
what you 've never seen one before
in the field museum once
it works
it worked when you were in sixth grade
people actually used to pay you for this
millions stephen -- and sexual favors
sheep do n't count
yeah
what about laura --
that was never proved
y'know i told myself a million times i did n't want to be a fireman
i said bullshit to that line about tradition and family legacy
i know i split and i know how you felt
yeah you know
you know what it felt like
i got ta do this stephen
i got ta know
i think you 're gon na find out brian
do n't be late tomorrow
ya love it probie
i 'm in heaven lt
hook us up to a stand pipe
y'know you got an awful short memory for direct orders
i told you to stay beside me
-- c'mon stephen
-- you split the team man
and what was that crap with the standpipe
you 'd think you and a hose were never introduced before
goddamn it stephen
-- i told you to stay next to me
-- i was doin' it
i was up there fucking doin' it
you do n't know man you do n't know what i did
what you did was drop the ball probie
get that right
c'mon ladies let 's roll some hose
-- never mind
thanks
brian -- -- see ya tonight
hey
hey
so you got a roid going with jackson or what
nah he 's nothin'
it 's just sometimes
sometimes you just got ta punch somebody out y'know
roll the hose
what are you kidding
by myself
what is it the stairs
christ i 'll let you win next time
you got a problem with drilling probie
no lt
i do n't have a problem with drilling
but let 's just have one drill
not one for the company and one for me
roll the hose
ready
christ stephen let 's wait for the hose team
listen to it brian
jump when i say
it wo n't get us
you okay
i waited
i would have fucking waited
that 's not what it 's about brian
the point is there was a kid in there
and what if there 'd been two
i went in because that 's what i do
it 's my way
it 's dad 's way
it is n't everybody 's way
dad 's way
where did he tell you that
in a fucking seance
you said you wanted to know something brian
what did you learn today
what do you say brian huh
time to move on
look you are sorta making yourself fair game
thanks for the insight
brian look --
just leave me alone okay
... not now brian
had to take on another fire bare- handed huh
had to be fucking myth man in there instead of looking out for your probie
is that what happened
is it stephen
i had that fire
he did n't listen
he did n't listen
he was a fucking candidate
he was your responsibility
he should n't have been there in the first place stephen
you burned him
fuck you
hey what are you doing here
just
just wanted to say hello
so hello
well long as you 're here you can help clean up a little
i 've got a guy coming to look at this in a few minutes
you 're selling dad 's boat
yeah it 's just another memory in my life right now
and i got way too many of them
i really should get back
there 's
there 's something i 'm supposed to do
yeah
what have you got to do
look at you
look at your face
all the things you must be thinking
man you must really hate my guts
well you know what
it 's okay
look stephen maybe we can talk about this some other --
-- okay so you do n't like me
you do n't like everything i 've done
what because i was n't such a genius the way i raised you
jesus christ dad was gone what was i supposed to do
you tell me what the fuck was i supposed to do
oh god stephen what 's going on with you
i do n't know brian
i do n't know
-- stephen wait a minute
i got ta talk to you
it 's adcox he 's --
-- what are you doing here
i saw adcox 's back
i saw the burn
i put it there
jesus christ stephen he 's been killing people
i know
how do you know
i knew when you came looking for the chemicals
looking for me
-- what were they doing there
they were for the fucking boat brian
anything else
what are we going to do about this
i 'll handle it
we got ta go to rimgale stephen
i 'm his lt
he 's my responsibility
i 'll handle it
me
you 're his lt
stephen
are you gon na handle it
are you stephen
shut up
you crazy son of a bitch why could n't you stay behind a desk where you belong
you never know till the fire stares you down if you 're gon na be --
oh shut up huh
i think i broke my goddamn arm
do n't tell them about adcox
do n't let 'em
i 'm sorry
i 'm sorry i thought
i wo n't
brian
jennifer
you 're back
you look great
thanks for calling
uh
i 've been sorta keeping a low profile
the academy
i graduated today
huh
so
i see you 're still in the neighborhood
not quite
just visiting
i live in lincoln park now
yeah
what have you been up to
i work for city hall
really
no kidding
what you think i just dried up and blew away when you left
the world does turn once in awhile brian even without your permission
well if nothing else it 's nice to know we can still be friends
i do n't want to be your friend brian
what was that
oh man you have picked up a few moves since john paul ii boulevard
yeah well i like to think i 'm just a little past hanging out on jp ii watching the irish pick fights and litwalks barf in the planters
i seem to remember some pretty good nights on jp ii
boy took you all of thirty seconds to blow that
c'mon jennifer he 's just another north side jag off with a mouth
brian do you always have to be so stupid
think about your future for once
so now you suddenly care about my future
look i did n't mean to take a piece out of you back there i just thought you 'd call when you came back
you did n't and
do n't blow it just because of this garbage between us
hey sorry if i made you look bad in front of your boss
but i 'm not gon na be a poster boy for him i 'm trying to do something here
there 's five hundred smoke eaters in this room that do that stuff for real every day
tell swayzak to talk to one of them
i 've been thinking about what you said the other night
if the offer 's still on the table i 'd like to talk about it
... okay
i 'll arrange things with your assignment captain
marty 's a good man brian
yeah
arson
straightest answer your department 's given me all week
hey
how 's it going
boss and i are up to about three words an hour
green committed to a thousand
there 's another fund raising party tonight
marty'd really like you to come
i do n't know i 'm kinda swamped here
i could use a date
yeah
well maybe i can fit it in
hi
hey
so are you dating your boss or what
if you were n't at least the 300th person to ask me that i 'd probably be pissed
boy you sure know it 's a man 's world sometimes
sorry
are you dating anyone
you think that 's really any of your business
well you did invite me here
marty did
but i wanted you to come to
okay
boy rimgale 's as slow as a snail is n't he
no he 's more of a dinosaur
guy 's not a dummy though
he 's juggling alot of balls on this one
yeah but it does n't take albert einstein just to figure out if these guys were killed by accidents or not
jesus give him a break
there is n't enough proof yet to go public
sure we found some chemical shit we think somebody dumped in the plugs to torch 'em and we 've maybe figured out why backdrafts but you ca n't rush this stuff
not till it 's locked
but rimgale 's probably going to come around to arson
in a dinosaur kinda way yeah
well our specimen here is your basic standard issue piece of primary suppression equipment
this area is the pumping panel which controls the rate of liquid insertion into the hose
uh huh
brian
what 's wrong
you told swayzak about our arson lead
it 's all over the fucking news
i did n't know it was a secret
there are n't supposed to be secrets between the city and its investigators --
-- bullshit
you knew what i told you was n't ready for the papers --
will you please keep your voice down there 's people --
-- you could have scared the son of a bitch off
we may never bust him now
all for a couple 's political points
i was doing my job
yeah
and just how much of all this has been doing your job
let me ask you something do you really think marty had you assigned to arson because of your firefighting skills
who the hell are you kidding
i was there remember
i saw you and your brother --
leave stephen out of this --
oh yeah he 's the real fireman
who are you
just another probie working for swayzak --
-- i work for the city
you knew what we were asking you to do
do n't suddenly pull out a conscience now
the fit is n't right
hi
hi
we still talking
look i 'm sorry about the other day --
swayzak knows something about the guys that were murdered
i want to know why he keeps that hidden
i do n't know anything about it
you could check
it 'd be in his files
do you know what you 're asking me to do
yes
y'know four years ago i was working in a bakery
two years ago i was bringing marty coffee and he did n't even know my name
i run that office now
marty believed in me and i believe in him
you want me to just throw that away
your boss is lying jennifer
what is --
just take it
i 'm sorry
that 's a dumb thing to say
you 're right
i think your boss is going to need some spin control
i quit two days ago brian
what 'll you do
i do n't have the slightest idea
i 'll see ya around huh
it 's a small town
brian mccaffrey
oh this is really a treat
brian mccaffrey
lost a dad to the animal huh
hey do i know you
i 'm close
but i ca n't get who it is
so you came to me
well this is going to be an interesting afternoon after all
who the fuck is doing this
after it took your dad
the fire
did it look at you brian
did it talk to you
oh jesus christ
not such a far walk after all is it brian
if it was a joke sir you 'd be laughing
you walked out on this academy six years ago
one week to graduation
you think we forgot that
you think i did
i want another shot sir
look everybody remembers your old man
being his son all you had to do was breathe to graduate here
dead hero father rule
but you blew us off
why should i take you back
if you remember sir my test scores were in the top --
-- i do n't give a damn what your test scores were maybe you could have been a good firemen but you had your shot
i need another one sir
sorry but it 's out of my hands
try again next year
no it is n't out of your hands or you would n't even have met me
if i push you have to let me back in
dead hero father rule
sir
even if you graduate this academy you 've still got nine months of probation
that 's hard duty son
if you do n't really love this job it 'll kill you
see you monday
sir
uh i 'm brian mccaffrey
your new assistant
your dennis kid
i work alone
are you still here
get used to me inspector
i 'm not going anywhere
then go find a corner
i do n't want you in my way
i think we should get something straight here
i was assigned to this office by the city
look i knew your father he had a helluva reputation on this job
but that do n't mean you get any slack
swayzak sends you down here okay i got ta eat you that 's the rules and i got nothing to say about that
but swayzak or no you live with me
step out of line and i do n't care who knows you i 'll swing the hammer
you think you 're the first
where are you going
pest control
-- shhh
what are you listening to
so you were happy here
warm and cozy and in no hurry
soot high clean unburned wall low indicates slow burn in thermal balance
find me some glass
glass
do we have a language barrier here
glass
uh i do n't think that 's in my contract
i just re wrote your contract
c'mere
read
trychtichlorate is a binary structured --
-- go to the bottom
under heat properties
during heat episodes of 2000 kelvin or higher trych breaks down and dissipates
will consume magnesium
ever burned magnesium
it 's so hot it takes water molecules and bamm
son of a bitch tears 'em apart just to eat the oxygen
would n't take much at all to melt ten gauge wire
problem 's burnt magnesium leaves a powder trace -- unless you could find something that would eat its residue
trychticholorate
then swayzak can announce seagrave was a murder
look it is n't proof okay
someone may have put the chemical in the outlet but we found it as a vapor in cosgrove 's clothes
and the putty around the door
even if it was used to seal the air off that does n't explain why someone would go to the trouble of a backdraft
a gun 's a helluva lot easier
but the right guess on this is arson
i do n't guess
some people say you do n't do much of anything when it comes to this case
i do n't work for them either
that 's it
oh that son of a bitch he 's different goddamn it
you see what this tells us huh
our killer does n't love fire
what
i got it after we talked to ronald
torches
want to fry the whole goddamn world
but the fires that killed those guys never really burned up much
-- the burns were all lit in outlets surrounded by double firebreaks in the walls
and he made his burns backdrafts
but he killed these guys
but he could have killed everybody there
the firebreaks kept it from spreading in the wall
the backdraft blew out the flame
that 's it
that 's the reason
what reason
why backdrafts
whoever fried seagrave and cosgrove went to a helluva lot of trouble to make sure they died by fire but also made sure the fire blew itself out
that 's why the sealant on the doors
so what have we got a torch with a conscience
no we have a stone killer trying to make a point
are you going public with this
no
do that and i guarantee you 'll scare him off
i do n't want him running away
what the hell are you doing here
i 'm finished with swayzak
i 'll do whatever you want me to do
i just want to help catch the guy that burned tim
you got ta give me another shot
in a word brian what is this job all about
fire
hey boss dekom trust is owned by pan illinois
which is majority controlled by lakeside dynamics
which is a division of windy city ventures
who 's partners are
alan seagrave donald cosgrove and jeffrey holcomb
son of a bitch
they knew each other
i 've got three different drafts of the same report -- with different numbers that 're all over the place
looks like they were just making it up as they went along
did a little check on the consulting firm that wrote the report
they did exactly one job -- swayzak 's manpower study
it 's not even really a company
no employees no directors just a po box
then who wrote the report
it had to be someone who knows numbers
some kind of fancy accountant
but what 's the connection
well brian i guess you can say it 's arson now
how ya feeling
did you pull me out
yeah
did i say thanks
no
just wondering
i hate hospitals
you 're so
so goddamn useless
so what do you want me to do
i 've been lying here hours
just thinking
we 're close
we 're not looking in the right place brian
this one knows us and we 're not looking in the right place
your brother was a good man
yeah
another couple of good men get burned up for their city
is that how it 's going to read
you 're the only one that knows
like it never happened
brian
hi helen
man you look great
you look like
brian
bout written you off
how long have you been in town
four months
four months
i know i know should'a called
i 've been really busy
i joined the fire department
that 's sean
jeez he 's a giant
yeah you 'd be surprised what three years can do to a kid
sean come on out man
what you forget your favorite uncle
stephen told him you were killed in a hot tub accident
yeah
big fan
and i 'm a huge fan of what you did to save that woman brian
uh i think there 's been a mistake
i did n't save that woman
no need to be modest brian
no you do n't understand i saved a mannequin
-- that really was incredibly work you did
you and your brother fighting fires together helluva image is n't it
you must feel lucky to be assigned under his command
every little boy 's fantasy
brian let me come to the point
i 'd like to offer you a job
i have a job
this one 's still with the fire department
one of our best investigators don rimgale is working on a very difficult visible case right now
we think he could use another pair of hands and you 're exactly the kind of guy i want representing us an authentic hero from a traditional firefighting clan
yeah we got all kinds of traditions -- like dying young
not every job in the fire department comes with a tombstone brian
this could be a great opportunity to move
beyond a fire engine
mr. mccaffrey
nice boat
it is n't mine
let 's get a picture
mr. mccaffrey
keeping busy
yeah
in fact i just dropped off a letter to the times explaining how yesterday 's arson announcement was a fabrication by your office
they loved it
and you know what
you were right my family background in firefighting gave it weight
completely out of control
what the hell are we waiting for
are n't you even curious
engine 115 right
how 'd you know
these are supposed to be sealed
lucky guess
and a case of scotch to a captain in station assignments
you crooked son of a bitch
why 115
lots of fires
they promote faster there
take a look at the last lt
's list half the guys on it came from that battalion
got ta think about your future timmy
115 's the station
ah man if you 're gon na bribe your way into a station why not 17 with me and your brother
man
something sure put a crimp in his evening
backdraft
do you have to do that
could you believe that fire
man
first day
there i was adcox and me pullin that lady right out of the fire 's fuckin throat
i love it here -- no surround and drown for this company
fighting 17th
goddamn stephen 's amazing
you see how he took that fire by the balls
i 'm gon na be that good some day you watch
y'know what stephen said to me right when all the shit was coming hard
you never know till the moment the fire stares you down if you 're just gon na do this job or be great at it
ah man is he usin that line now on you
what you think he made that little gem up
jesus christ i used to have to listen to my old man use that every morning
well if it is n't the littlest mccaffrey
hey
you break anything with that you buy it
sorry there must be something wrong with my eyes
i keep thinking that 's a fire department uniform
it 's in my blood willy
really
well let 's have a look at what else was in your blood
i always look forward to getting these they make such a nice collage for the bar
assistant director sales aspen snowmobile tours
did n't offer the kinda growth and challenge i need
uh huh
and pioneer 's pride mobile log cabins
that was in your blood about six months was n't it
management were pin heads
laguna jamming custom surfboards
coffee sucked
and just this year brian 's sound spectrum
your own company even
big step
i was ahead of my time
you know i 've got a perfect little spot here for brian mccaffrey fireman
who 's going to die
brian
he 's not doing it right dad
he never does it right
well let 's have a look
your brother 's right
if you do n't fasten these correctly they could open and you 'd get burned
and die
fireman shit
hey what 's with the mouth
where 'd you grow up a barn
firehouse
cute
dad
you 've come along a dozen times stephen give your brother a chance
we 'll be back in a few minutes
how 'bout it sport
i hate it when we got ta fucking go look for it
call in another alarm
we 're gon na need some back up
stevie
rimgale 's here to see you
i 'm busy
he just wants to --
-- i 'm busy goddamn it okay
you ca n't talk about my brother like that
here we go
stephen what are you doing here
fixing my roof
it 's not your roof anymore
where 's sean
he 's got piano lessons
oh yeah
how 's he doing
he 's going to be a fireman
give up babe
you ca n't fight it
believe me my mom tried
stephen you got ta stop just showing up on the roof like this
i just wanted to i do n't know not exactly apologize for the other night -- especially since i do n't remember much of it --
-- you remember
yeah
i just thought i should say i do n't know something
the great communicator
sorry i hit jackson
he deserved it
he was born deserving it
he treats you okay
okay
i treated you better
you treated me like shit
you want some coffee
coffee
nah i got ta go
what 's wrong stephen
c'mon you only beat up the roof when something 's on your mind
how 's brian doing
he 's out
i know he 's out but how 's he doing
y'know i treated him better than any other probie i ever had
he probably hates my guts but i did the best thing for him
i made him finally look in the mirror
ah stephen that 's what this is really about is n't it
you always have to be right
hey i 'm the first one to admit when i 'm wrong
yeah
when was the last time
in a fire
never
look i 'm his brother
i care about him y'know
he was going to get himself killed
maybe not today maybe not in a year but it would 've happened
and i could n't -- i just could n't
you ca n't keep being his father
i 'm sorry
i
could n't sleep
what 's wrong
i
it used to be when i was a kid what meant most to me about this job was there were no ifs
life and death right and wrong
when someone called the fire department we came
those guys do n't know how much i love them
you do n't leave people hanging
cause that 's what it 's all about
it 's loyalty
it 's till death do us part
is n't that what you heard
it 's you go we go
cause without that it 's the end of families it 's the end of the fire department
and when the fire department stops coming
that 's the end of the fucking world
i 'm sorry i came helen it 's just
it 's just there 's nobody i can talk to
i miss you
cook and i are almost finished here
have a seat
stephen
i
can i talk to you a second
look i 'm sorry i --
-- no that 's okay
it 's just sean
-- he 's gettin good on those eggs
and y'know he told me he actually likes the piano
i do n't want to confuse him stephen
they ran the residue you scraped from both crispers front doors
it 's a combination of plumber 's putty and rayophene gum
burns almost completely away when you light it
putty
on both doors
there 's something else kinda interesting
shadow
how ya doin' ronald
staying comfortable
did n't think you 'd make it
would n't miss this for the world pal
who 's this
he works for me
is he a fireman
i like firemen
you like everybody ronald
you do n't know him
i know you
knock it off
now
tell him about me shadow
ronald here likes telephones
used to tape wooden matches to the bell striker and wrap it in cotton
came up with a whole little thing there did n't you ronald
when you got bored what did you do
you just started making calls
mostly day care centers and retirement homes was n't it
did he tell you how we finally met
nobody cares ronald
oh but it 's a good story shadow
you 're depriving our famous young friend here
sure ronald
you 're ready alright
absolutely
-- burn them
and old ladies
-- burn them
and the world -- the whole world
-- burn it all
got a cause
are the glory boys actually showing interest in investigation 's work
i may have a stroke
the glory boys just want to finish their report so they can go home
i 'm working on it
i deal with this stuff every day
but a fireman
you never get used to it
what happened up there
he was a candidate
did he pay attention
was he listening
... he was n't listening to the right thing
what do you listen to stephen
you do n't know
nobody knows
i might
it knows us
this one knows us
i need that report lt
when are you going to catch the prick that 's doing this don
don
do n't you have any leads at all
no marty i do n't
we still have n't found a connection between the victims
jesus open your eyes
seagrave cosgrove and now holcomb -- fried in a goddamn high rise
holcomb
i did n't know the name of that victim had even been released yet
is there a connection between them alderman
just catch the son of a bitch
mr. swayzak
how ya doin'
investigator
i 'm a little busy right now --
this'll only take a minute
there 's two cops outside that want to ask you about this --
i 'm gon na need some bread man
this ai n't fair
i 'm always here for you and you ca n't even take decent care of me
my landlord is bitching like a motherfucker
you 're two months behind on the rent lieutenant
didya ever think of moving to a cheaper apartment
3,500 a month is crazy man
it 's nothing
this is new york man
oh -- i forgot
bowtay needs some cash to buy her new acting headshots out of the developers
it 's a good investment man
she could make serious money
brown downtown
there has n't been any smoking brown on the street in --
who said anything about the fucking street
i 've got more connects than you have lieutenant
i ca n't get over what those guys did to her
i just ca n't
they 're alive are n't they
come on man
everyone 's making such a fucking fuss just because she 's a nun
just because she wears a penguin suit the church puts up 50 g for the guys who dared to rape her
do you think they 'd put up a dime if you got raped
of course not
or even for your little sister
the virgin
like shit they would
susie 's not a virgin anymore
she 's fucking nine years old
jesus christ
people
you believe that man is the be all and end all
yeah
ok
ok
fine
but -- do you believe in god
it 's not the drugs ariane it 's -- it 's someone who wants to kill me
you got ta believe me
why
christ
shit
i could kill them all with my bare hands
who
those fucking mob assholes
c'mere
you got some good blow right
yeah
then c'mere
i got something for you
first i 'll put your uptown in the spoon then to make it more exciting i 'm gon na add some downtown
they call this thing a speedball honey but then you must know that
first time shooting up
nah
sure it is
you 're a virgin
just like that nun
and i 'm gon na rape you
can you believe the nerve of this fucking guy
he kills people for fun and then he puts up 100 g to bring in some guys who raped a nun
what a sick fuck
man
who
a wiseguy
paying 100 grand for the rapists if i turn then over direct to him
but you could do it baby
we could use the bread
you mean you could use it
i got it man
i will find those kids
and i 'll get the 50 g from the church
then the kids'll go to jail
i 'll be in charge of course
after a little while i 'll break the fuckers out -- and i 'll turn them in to shithead i was just talking to
and pick up his 100 g. no
i 'll hit him up for 200 g. or 250 g. l can do it -- 'cause i 've got the kids
then of course there 's the 180 g i 'm gon na pick up on the game tonight -- when the strawberries win
the strawberries
the mets
so anyway chalk up another 180 g for the game
jesus christ
that 's almost half a million dollars
ariane
wait
that 's not good enough i 'll ask the shithead for 280 g for the kids
then it 'll be a perfect 500 thousand
yeah
perfect
280 g for the kids
yeah it 's good i prepared or i would n't have thought to --
are you all right honey
i was gon na bring it back myself
so what are you doing here
he wants to know who brought in the chalice
that 's no mystery
julio and paolo brought it in you do n't want to hurt those boys do you
i mean they sure as hell have got something coming but it ai n't what the law wants to give them
you understand
no
how could you understand
that stuff'll kill you quick man
what the fuck are you
a drug counselor or a drug dealer
and you do n't even do your own product
what kind of businessman are you
the rich kind
jeez man
the way you smoke that shit is suicide
fuck you
just give me back a little something for the road
how are you doing man
very good
very good
the mets are gon na win tomorrow
there
now you 've got your profit and more
you 'll have more product day after tomorrow right
uh right
sure
the mets are gon na win tomorrow
i know
take care of yourself man ok
be cool
i forgive you
me
i forgive you
you ca n't forgive me
after what i 've done
i 've fucked up bigtime
i 've been bad
real bad
i forgive you
please
please do n't forgive me
i 've always hated you for that
i forgive you
why
why ca n't you hate me
hate me
please
help me
hate me
help me
hate me
i forgive you
why
jesus
why me
why ca n't i wash the ashes from my forehead year after year after year
and why am i still drunk on your blood the taste of your flesh on my tongue
worst of all why ca n't i feel the nails in my palms the spear in my side the crown of thorns round my head
why do i have to know over and over that it was you
you who died died for my sins
and that i will die for nothing
why
i forgive you
why do i dream every night of the whore who brought you water on your road to death
and why have i never forgotten that if she then i --
oh really
yeah really
i 'm no fucking asshole man
i 'm a fucking cop
ok cop
i want you to give yourself and your friends on the force a message
tell them i 've got my own reasons to be very interested in whomever did the job on the nuns
i 'll double the church reward if you bring those punks direct to me
100 g cash
get it
here 's the deal you meet me tonight across from the garden
33rd 8th
at the beginning of the ninth inning
we 'll listen to the end of the game together
you bring your cash i 'll bring mine
yeah sucker
you better be there
i got them all going for oakland
with bullshit money
we 'll cover the 800
all right
what are you gon na do
i want 15 on the mets
how about 7 1/2
hey man
do n't give me that bullshit
do n't pussy out on me
the mets are a fucking lock
i wanna make some money
are you sure
yeah
i 'm sure
ok asshole
you owe thirty grand
now what are you gon na do
i wanna go double or nothing on the next game
double or nothing
are you fucking out of your mind
i 'm not gon na let that bastard take my money
take your money
this guy will blow up your house and everyone in it
there 's just no way the mets will lose this game
gooden is pitching and strawberry is ready to break out
fuck strawberry
you 're gon na end up owing 60 g to a homicidal maniac
that 's my problem
just put in my bet
do you have the money
what money
do n't bullshit me
i do n't got it
not tonight
you ca n't get blood from a stone
this psycho can
oooo
big fucking scary guy
just put 120,000 on tomorrow 's game
you 're a fucking joke you know that
he 's been waiting for the money since the fucking game ended
and i 've been waiting here since -- forget it
listen up
you 're gon na get us both fucking killed
you know that
uh uh
i 'm gon na win
just make sure the bet gets in
get this man
i was at the game today
face to fucking face with strawberry
jesus
i saw him strikeout
and you know what
he looked at me and i looked at him and he laughed and i laughed and it was like we were all alone in that whole stadium and only we understood that it was all a racket that he struck out on purpose and that he 's saving it up for the big one
tomorrow
today i understood for the very first time that --
you 've really got a problem
-- that there was never any other way it could have gone
never any other way
so you had better just put in my fucking bet
120,000 on the last game
the big one
come on
are you a bookmaker or fucking what
here
look i 'll give you the psyho 's number you call him yourself and tell him wnat you want
forgive me father for i have sinned
it has been two days since my last confession
father my sin is a terrible sin
a sin of omission
there was another sin that happened at the same time and in the same place but my sin i think was graver stil
sister we all know what happened to you yesterday morning
i expected that you would want to speak to me about it
but you could have come to my office
your being here in the confessional implies that you sister have done something wrong
you have n't
i assure you
i feared you might have misplaced feelings of guilt
if you condemn yourself because you experienced feelings of
curiosity or even
pleasure you must n't --
father if it was so trivial so natural so -- no
i have sinned
and you must listen if you are to prescribe an appropriate act of contrition and to absolve me
father what would you do if you had but one day in which to use your arms to serve god
it 's funny you knew
but the first thing i think of is kneading the bread that i help bake for the soup kitchen
maybe that 's because my the muscles in my arms still hurt
i also thought of that bread father
and of that night six days ago when the mother superior died and i kept the cool damp cloth on her forehead freshly moist
father what would you do if you had but one day in which to use your legs to serve god
i think of running for help and falling to my knees in prayer
as i have prayed day and night since the desecration of this church yesterday morning -- and my sin
you see father --
yes sister
yesterday morning god gave me but one chance to use something else to serve him
not my arms or my legs but something i used for the first time for the last time and will never use again
my vagina
those boys those sad raging boys
they came to me as the needy do
and like many of the needy they were rude
like all the needy they took
and like all the needy they needed
father
i knew them they learn in our school
and play in our schoolyard
and they are good boys
you knew them
who were they sister
who are these boys
what are the names of these -- good boys you knew
yo big black we needs a name for this joint
how 'bout
blak out
blak listed
blak ball
need i say more
b l a k it is
keep trying
i 'm on it
he gots to be did
did he gots to be
you truly are a dancing fool
yo black you looking for trouble
everybody say ho
ho
that'swhati'mtalkin'bout
that'swhati'mtalkin'bout
i want to be the first to welcome you to the second taping of mantan the new millennium minstrel show
my name is honeycutt and i want to try something different
can you do this for me
yeah
i 'm gon na start a chant and i want y' all to follow me
let 's make our own 2 real coons know you 're ready to start the show
c'mon
it 's easy
it 's the same thing y' all do out at the yankee game no different cept we changing one word
everybody go it
yeah
alright
here we go
let 's go niggers
let 's go niggers
let 's go niggers
let 's go niggers
louder
they ca n't hear you
you idiot
you almost gave me a massive coronary
i did n't mean to scare you like that
well you did
give me some
i 'm not huggin you in the middle of the street
you must be crazy julius
whoa hold up li'l sis
i done told you 'bout that
julius ai n't my name you better recognize hopkins was our slave name
my true name is
i 'm not callin you big black africa
mommy and daddy named you julius
big black is the first name and africa is the last
damn sis you do n't keep no food up in here in dis piece
i order out mostly
so what do i owe this visit to
the mau mau 's are up in dis place
that 's right the mau mau 's
what 's your name
my righteous name is big black
and what are the mau mau 's going to do for us today
we gon na drop some knowledge wisdom and understanding
the mau- mau 's we be scientists
we drop science
we 're ready when you are
microphone check
one
two
one
two
one
two
hold up
i gots to give my peeps some props
brothers introduce yourself
our first caller is big black from brooklyn
go head
microphone check one two
one two
yo tavis i be lovin' yo show but mantan you is foul
why you perpetrating
you a sellout
and big black from brooklyn what do you do
what do i do
what do you do
i 'm a revolutionary
and another thing you better stay away from my sister or you better
ladies and gentlemen there is no need to go there
we can all agree to disagree without making threats
life is beginning to look up
it 's all good in da neighborhood
you might be right
why are you smiling so
i 'm not smiling
naw not you
it ca n't be
that hottie sloan hopkins
it 's that bad huh
it 's all over my face
no shame in ya game
she got ya nostrils ya chnoz is wide open
sloan 's what we certified ladies men call low hanging fruit
certified ladies man huh
she 's also moorish
what 's that
moorish
ya get a little taste of dat booty ya wanna get some more
seconds and thirds too
sloan is all dat
i try her
i 'm a tri sexual
you 'd try anything
i got first dibs
you get ya own stuff
naw just jokin
that 's you
that 's you
please have a seat
sloan never told us she had friends like you
in fact we never knew she had any friends period
why they got ta make my nose so big
look at my lips
i 'm not drinking the kool aid
what are you talkin about
jim jones y'know
i 'm not drinking the kool aid
meaning
i 'm out
good
i 've got a broken back from carrying you all these years anyway
so that 's what you been doing
damn skippy
you 're in this up till ya neck
do n't shoot me i 'm just the piano players
you can walk away
we both can
yeah that 's easy for you to do
you never had any talent
i 'm so tired of you running that
i always worked hard for you
you think i 'm a leech a kling on i quit
good morning cheeba
good morning to you mr. delapot
de la croix
y'know what i mean
got a gig yet for manray and i yet
sloan and i have been looking all over for you
you 'd take no offense if we called you dela for short
no offense
manray needs a job
i have this concept for a tv pilot
there 's no guarantee it will get made but regardless you 'll still make some money
how much
first things first
i have to know if manray is up for this
what kind of show is this gon na be
different
what about in the mean time
not the in between time
you 'll both get an advance and you can stay with me
i 'm starvin like marvin
my world famous famous world arroz con pollo will be ready very soon
hurry up i wanna watch hbo
did we get our bill yet
ahh the luxuries of life
yo check it
this is good and all that but one day soon i want to have much benjamins so i can have a nice crib and pay all my bills
you hear me
chill i 'm the brains behind this outfit
and i 'm the feet
yo you got ta show some patience
you want me to snap my fingers and presto chango you 're an overnight sensation
son there is no such thing
i 'm tired of waiting
we ran out without my shoes and the floor
i got ta get my stuff
what about our savings
are you crazy
the joint is crawling with cops now
you wanna go to rikers
go to the hoosegow
we got evicted from our home
we 've both been on the streets for the last week
we was coming to see you
if it 's not too much trouble could you order us some food
we 're starving
that ai n't funny
dela i do n't know 'bout this
manray sloan says you 're too talented to be dancing on the street
well do something about it
my tap shoes
eureka
what do i have to do
some tap dancing some singing
where do i sign
i want you to start using the name mantan and not manray if you do n't mind
why
you have to start getting into your character
mantan
mantan
i 'm not playin myself no mo
how you sound
i wo n't do it anymore
manray i 'm very sorry about ya boy cheeba and sloan
believe me it gave me no joy pulling ya coattail about her just lookin out for a brother
i feel you all this stuff happenin at once but you ca n't let if affect your work
you got ta be professional
i 'm always gon na be that
but i ai n't doing no more buck dancing
no costume
no blackface
our guest today is pierre delacroix
he is the creator of the highly controversial tv show mantan
let 's get right into it
you have been called by some in the community a traitor a sellout an uncle tom
why does your show generate such feelings
because race has always been a sensitive issue in this country
gary i have no problem with people disagreeing with the show it 's when folks start trying to mess with my inherent right as an artist that 's when i get mad
no one in any way shape or form should be censored
no matter how sexist or racist the material may be
yes
and i say yes because who is to judge
who is to stand before us and say this is righteous and this is not
who
who can play god
but the line has to be drawn
do n't you people get it
we 're in the 21st century
slavery was over four hundred years ago
all that stuff people talked in the old days it 's over
folks always crying white man this white man that
let 's all grow up
are you trying to excuse our holocaust
can i finish
thank you
i had a great aunt we called her sister
she went to her grave not believing man had walked on the moon
... exactly thirty two minutes ago
i 'm sorry i 'm late
do you know how much information can be dispensed in one minute alone
i did n't find out about this very important staff meeting until
four minutes ago
so are you telling me everyone knew about this get together except you
i was n't told about this until marie informed me as soon as i got off the elevator
do you know what c.p. time is
c.p. time is colored people 's time
the stereotypical belief that negroes are always late
that negroes have no sense of time time except when it comes to music or dance
i 'm sorry about my blowup but i have to have a whipping boy every meeting
i understand
but again in all honesty i was not informed
forget it
i believe you 're my most creative person i 've got on staff
you 're hip
you know what 's happening
i got some corny white boys and girls writing for me
the middle class black family moves into a white suburban enclave
the middle class black family moves into a small southern town that is run by the kkk
the middle class single black father raises his teenage daughter
the middle class single black father raises his teenage daughter
the middle class single black mother raises her teenage son
and so on and so forth
it 's too clean too antiseptic
... to white
i still feel all of my scripts would make good shows
delacroix wake up brother man
the reason why they did n't get picked up was because nobody and i mean nobody niggers and crackers alike wants to see that junk
i 've never been given a fair shot
you got your head stuck up your ass with your harvard education and your pretentious ways
brother man i 'm blacker than you
i 'm keepin it real and you 're frontin trying to be white
i 'm an oreo a sell out
because i do n't aspire to do homeboys from out of space secret diary of desmond pfeiffer a pj 's or some as you might put it some nigger show
i 'm a tom
i 'm whiter than white and you 're blacker than black
is that what you think
that 's exactly what i think
i want you to create something that people want to see
let 's be honest the majority of the people in the country are deaf dumb and blind and i 'm including 35 million african americans
you know and i know niggers set the trend set the styles
this is a golden opportunity now
these idiots have to be led to the water
i 'm not sure if i can deliver what you want
you will or you 'll be back at bet so quick you 'll never know what hit you
i need a mid season replacement and pronto
it will be on the fast track
what is it you want from me
some plantation follies
some sitcom that takes place on a watermelon patch
some show that follows four nigger generations of junkies and crackheads
you want me to go back to the ante bellum days
yes
yes
yes
i want a show that will make headlines that will have millions and millions of households tuned in glued to their televisions every week
i want advertisers dying to buy on this show
i 'm gon na squeeze this show out of you if it kills you
delacroix i 'm glad you got your mind right
it 's right and tight
good morning let me introduce you to everybody
you know my assistant sloan
we 're all happy to be here and i 'm going to paint a picture for you
i 'm wid it
i 've done a lot of soul searching and once again you are right
in my previous work it 's been all surface superficial
i have never really dug deep
not anymore
as mark twain fully understood satire is the way
race has always been a hot button in this country 's history and it needs to be pushed harder
if we are ever to live side by side in peace and harmony
it 's about promoting racial healing
go on
good so far
i know you 're familiar with minstrel shows
they came about at the turn of the 19th century
it was a variety show in which the talent was in blackface singing dancing telling jokes doing skits
dunwitty i ask you when was the last time there was a good variety show on the air
carol burnett
heehaw
word
so let 's take this great form this very american tradition of entertainment into the 21st century into the new millennium
the name of the show
it is called mantan the new millennium minstrel show
i 'm lovin' it
you know how i know
because i 'm getting a boner my johnson is hard no disrespect my sister
i 'm feelin dis
it will take a lot of courage and backbone on the part of the cns to get this on the air
in fact i would understand fully if the subject matter is deemed too risque too controversial
do n't worry about that that 's my department
now who do we cast
we need a star
can whoopi sing or dance
i do n't know if whoopi is the way to go
are these our two stars sitting here in front of my nose
which one is mantan again
that 's a great handle
mantan and sleep n eat
two real coons
i know we 're way out there but it 's satire
i want you take it there
all the way to the edge and back
negroes would be in an uproar
so what
we would just give the naacp a donation that would be the end of that
no such thing as bad publicity
so what
earlier you said singing and dancing
mantan right here is a gifted hoofer
he has educated feet
who are the other characters
do we have characters
how about honeycutt snowflake rastus nigger jim sambo jungle bunny and how could we forget aunt jemima
we gon na hit 'em wid da bomb dickey on dis one
what 's the setting
in the projects
like eddie murphy 's the pj 's
ya first bad move
projects been done
that 's one of the problems now everything movies tv are set in the urban jungle da hood
that 's so tired
mantan 's millennium minstrel show should be set on a plantation
in alabama
and every week these alabama porch monkeys will make us cry make us laugh make us look at our own humanity
make us feel good to be alive
i do n't know about that plantation angle
what are you talkin 'bout
it 's the move
stay wid me now
we 're movin fast
what does everybody else think about this
that'swhati'mtalkin''bout
that'swhati'mtalkin''bout
he 's off the hiz hook
we think so
sleep n eat what do you do
i strongly feel that a negro should direct this
this kind of satire is a high wire act in a gale storm
one misstep and we 're doing amos and andy
only a negro will have the sensitivity and cultural awareness to navigate this dangerous terrain
to hire someone solely on their ethnicity gender or religion is not right
it 's un american
i will hire someone who is most qualified for this particular job
i was hoping to perhaps direct some episodes myself if not the pilot soon after
i want a hot young white director
maybe the kid that pheenom who just did that hot new sexy madonna video
you 're telling me some white boy is gon na direct this pilot
i just want you to meet him
keep an open mind
besides what does he know about negroes
probably nuthin' but that 's why it 's such a sexy way to go
sometimes an outsider has a fresh new outlook a different unique perspective
a black director y'know what he 's gon na do given the subject matter
with this kid the possibilities are endless
what are his qualifications besides being a white male and directing a hot new sexy freaky madonna video
if spielburg can direct the color purple and amistad our whiz kid can direct the mantan pilot
that 's exactly my point
has he even directed actors before in anything
no
just meet the guy
that 's all i 'm asking
look i 'll even let you choose your own musical director
you can have that
in the immortal words of derrick coleman whooopdeedamndoo
derrick coleman he possessed all the talent in the world coulda shoulda been a great ballplayer but alas d.c. did n't want it bad enough
delacroix do you want it
bad enough to kill for it
do you want it that much
i 'm gon na leave you two creative geniuses alone
dunwitty do n't leave
yo dela i just got the news from the cns brass
they saw some clips from the pilot and they 're rushing it onto the air
yo we 're a midseason replacement ordered 12 shows
we 're on in 3 weeks
didya hear what i just said yo
they did n't even view a rough cut just some scenes we quickly cut together
this has to be a big mistake
the big mistake was my not believing in your genius earlier
from the gitgo from jump street
hold on a sec i got a call
hello mommy let me get rid of this other call
i gots to go it 's my moms
i want to meet her one day please tell her the great news
i 'm out like vanilla ice
what do you want
i want to speak with you
go away unless you got my money
it 's me peerless
son
good to seeya
good to seeya
it 's been a long time
pull up a chair
oh excuse me this is my lady dot
pleased to meet you
good woman
i trained her right
daddy she 's younger than me
my game is still strong
no viagra for me do n't need no chemicals
just my tonic
purely for medicinal purposes
i thought you had promised mommy you stopped
i did
i 'm not an alcoholic
i just like to drink
how did you end up here
how did i end up at the third rate chittlin circuit greasy hole in the wall in west hell virginny
is that what you 're asking ya daddy
that 's what i 'm askin
because i had too much pride
too much integrity
i would n't lick nobody 's butt
some material i refused to do
daddy it ca n't be just because of that
there had to be other factors
that 's the only reason period
they only want one certain kind of black comic
another one of your conspiracies to hold ya career back
all i know is what happened to me
all that other mess i just file into the life 's too short category
let 's get him over to the bed
baby you treat me so good
peerless you 're a good son i love you
you never gave me no trouble
i love you too daddy
always keep 'em laughing
glad to meet you too
you are all your father talks about
is that so
how long has my father been like this
not that often
he was excited to see you
so he drank himself into a stuper
the drinking is for the pain
it does n't kill it just dulls it
so what 's up with you
i was a hostess at this club your daddy was performing and i had never laughed so hard in my life
he asked me to come with him
i quit my job and we 've been together ever since
do n't tell him it 's from me or he wo n't take it
your father is proud of you
he never showed it
he did the best way he knew how junebug is stubborn just like you
how was it
why did n't you tell me about this staff meeting
nobody told me anything
what good are you if you do n't tell me stuff like this
it was n't my fault
if i would have known i would have known
manray
manray
you lost me
dunwitty wants a coon show
and that 's what i 'm going to give him it 's going to be so racist so negative he wo n't have the balls to put it on the air
hence i 'll prove my point
what point is that
the point being that him the networks do n't want black people on television unless they are buffoons
sounds risky to me
you getting cold feet
i 'm in till the end
good
i 'm going to need your support
ca n't you just quit
walk away
and lose out on my money
the only way i get paid is if i get fired
and that 's what i intend to do
maybe something happened to them
maybe they 're lying in an alley bleed to death
manray better not be bleeding to death
i need him
after we 're done he can do whatever he wants to do until then he 's ours
hello
this is cheeba
you okay
i feel like somebody hit me upside da head with a sledgehammer
what is your problem
my problem is mantan the new millenium minstrel show
why did you even come up with that shit if you did n't want it made
it was the principle
dunwitty had to be enlightened
i was making a point
i take pride in my work
plus i already told you i was n't gon na walk away from my money
fuck da money
why do through all this effort
why
are you looking for love from dunwitty
for respect
dunwitty and his likes do n't give a goddamn about you
so now what are you gon na do
even if money was n't an issue dunwitty will still go ahead without me and that could be more dangerous
what 's the chances of mantan being picked up
i would n't bet against it
my negroidal ass is stuck between the proverbial rock and a hard place
like i said all this for some twisted distorted sense of principal
dunwitty he just tolerates your negroidal ass he does n't respect it
good morning for those of you who do n't know me i 'm pierre delacroix
i 'm running things and this here is my assistant sloan hopkins
hello
i 've never worked with any of you and you 've never worked with me so we 'll be starting from scratch
i 'm a fair person a straight shooter and i do n't hold my tongue
everybody up in here should know i had nothing to do with you being hired
this is the group i was telling you about
which one is your brother
the big one
your life will never be the same
let 's leave the man in peace so he can get ready
we both lied to him
what do you want me to say
just do n't lie to me
same here
the pleasure is mine
i want to apologize about my brother and the mau mau 's
i should not have imposed them on you
c'mon
you were only doing what family is supposed to be doing for family
you gave your brother a shot
that 's all anybody can ask for an opportunity a chance a shot
he got his
who 's side are you on
i 'm sorry i ca n't help it
it 's too funny
what would their reaction be
i had n't the foggiest
everybody shut up
so you have your small victory now what
a small victory is n't that small when you 've been use to losing
what is this
a gift
for what
no matter what you think you did come up with something unique
open it
the jolly nigger bank
this is authentic not a repro circa turn of the century
thanks
i thought it was appropiate
is that good or bad
it 's all good
you got a hit show you 're gon na need a bank
plus i love these old black collectibles
how so
to me it shows part of our history in this country a time when we were considered inferior sub human
this is crazy
that 's why it will be so much fun
that was a mistake but i do n't regret it
the first and only time
a big mistake
i 'm gon na have to ask you not to see mantan anymore
work related or otherwise
otherwise
i trust you know the difference
you 're an intelligent woman finished at nyu
dela kiss my big black ass
and that 's how you got me in the first place
do n't make me have to use this
i did n't think this was in your studies at nyu
i told you but you would n't listen
you never listened to me
give me the gun
yes your name
he i 'm mona
hi mona
i perfectly understand where you 're coming from
as a minority i can relate to your struggle also
but i think you should give us all a chance
we want this pilot to be successful just as much as you
please do n't be so quick to judge us based only on our whiteness
oh is that what i 'm doing
this thing was rigged the deck was stacked the fix was in
could don king be near
good thing sloan had my back
she 's my rock
this was going to be a whole lot of work
david i appreciate your comments
anybody got an ideas
everybody just talk out loud
i 've always liked the format of rowan and martin 's laugh in
i 'm happy for all of us
it 's just we have a great responsibility now
the pressure is on
pressure
dela you do n't know what the hell real pressure is
sheeett
this is lightstuff
now when you scramblin out on the street in da january winter and the hawk is talkin to you with no money and no prospects of money anytime soon now that there is some pressure
i did n't mean it to sound like that
so they can be on tv
you sound like the media
this is nothing
it will blow over by tomorrow
same thing giuliani said
tomorrow it will be all about cruelty to animals or some sex scandal
besides there is no such thing as bad publicity
no joke
serious
hope the same thing does n't happen to me
that 's some big shoes to fill
in time
what are you
a man or a mouse
are you a punk
punking out on me
no
you getting scared because some people do n't like what you are doing
yo dela they tried to lynch my black ass up in dat piece
you 've made it from the guttermost to the uppermost
do n't you know you should never let them see you sweat
y'knowwhati'msayin
yeah
and now is definitely not the time to bitch up
you should n't even be mad at me over sloan
what you did is dead wrong
oh is it
buddy boy in this business if people do n't produce they get fired
sloan is the hardest working person i 've ever met
let me ask you a question if i may
how do you think she got the job in the first place
i do n't mean to burst your bubble mantan the marvelous but sloan is an opportunity
i do n't believe it
do i have to spell it out for you
in fact go ask sloan yourself
mantan we got a show to tape
my name is manray goddamnit
kook and the gang it 's manray
let 's do the taping
you go back to your dressing room get dressed and blacken up
you must think i 'm some kind of fool
it looks delicious
you hear me talkin to you
the only time you come up here when something is wrong
c'mon mommy do n't start with that i 'm an ungrateful son stuff
i said no such thing
all i said is that something must be wrong
how 's the food
ca n't beat it with a hammer
well since you asked it looks like i may have a new show a pilot being shot
that 's wonderful
is n't that what you always wanted a show of your own
he wants you to come and see him
he said that
yes he did
where is he
he 's performing at some place outside of richmond virginia
i ca n't go all the way down south
richmond is not all the way down south
i do n't even know why you 're still concerned over him
daddy 's not with you
regardless he still is your father
it 's gon na be hard for me to get away with the show taking off
even more reason to see him
he 'll be overjoyed with your success
c'mon mommy
daddy has n't been impressed with anything i 've ever done
from winning my fifth grade spelling bee to the present
peerless last time go see your father
i 'm doing okay
been reading about your show it 's all over everywhere
i watched it 's all over everywhere
i watched it once
i thought you said there would be no buffoonery
you going to attack me too
the show is a hit
are n't you happy for me
of course i 'm happy for you
you 've worked very hard for your success
yes i have very hard
has daddy called
no
not at all
you know how your daddy is
if and when he calls please do n't forget to ask him if he 's seen mantan
i wo n't forget
when are you coming up here to see your mother
soon
nice to meet you
if you do n't mind me asking you how old are you
i just turned twenty
where are you from
helsinki which is the capital of finland
finland
you know finlandia vodka
yes
yes i know
jukka have you ever seen a negro person before
even had a real conversation with a real negro before
what 's a negro
a fiasco
a disaster
a boondoggle
an abomination
did you just ask me what 's a negro
i'm a negro
ahhh
i never heard of that term before
i thought you were black of african american
no
well before there was black or african american there were negroes
i'm a negro
thank you for correcting my ignorance
i 'm looking forward to working side by side with you
i feel we make a good team
how did you get this gig
my visual style is very erotic sexy how do you say hot
this is a tv show not a music video
then will you teach me what i need to know
maybe we learn from each other if that 's possible no
this is a travesty
a debacle
good luck jukka
do a good show
thank you very much
i always try my best
the mantan manifesto
catchy ai n't it
number one
we gainfully employ african americans in front of and behind the cameras
two
let the audience decide
three
who put these critics in charge
these so called cultural police
four
who determines what is black
five
mantan is a satire
six
if they ca n't take a joke f 'em
we all stick to this it 's smooth sailing
let myrna finish
thank you
and always smile
yes you
this show was created conceived by you a non threatening african- american male
voila
end of argument
it ca n't be racist because you 're black
i never had a really real pair before
you 've never had any formal training either
not a class not a thing just picked stuff up by myself
i wish i had your natural talent
god only makes that visit once in a while
you sing and dance
a little
i just graduated from nyu film school
cinema studies
so what 's up with you and dela
what do you mean
are you and him kicking it
knocking boots
y'knowwhati'mtalkin'bout
no we 're not knocking boots
i got this internship while i still was at nyu dela was impressed with my get up and go and hired me to be his assistant
i 'm sure that was the only thing he was impressed with
you look beautiful like that
if that was suppose to be a compliment i thank you
you 're welcome
you should n't give up on performing
why do you say that
you 've never seen me
i think that would probably make you the happiest
when i 'm hoofing i mean really doing my thing hitting it nothing compares to that feeling in the world
i envy you
that 's the way i want to feel about my work
our guest tonight is the extraordinary talented performer mantan
thanks for coming in
tavis thank you for having me
before we begin i want to thank you for coming on my show for your first television interview
you could have chosen mike wallace barbara walters jane pauley whatnot but you 're here
i 'm more comfortable around my people
let 's jump right into it
your show has sparked a world of controversy provoked a tone of dialogue
how do you see all of this
yo tavis check it out
this is the two one the 21st century and it 's all about the money
like my man mase says it 's all about the benjamins
money and nothing else
money makes the world go round
it ai n't no joke being poor
i know whati'mtalkin''bout
y'knowwhati'msayin
i 've lived on the street
i 've been homeless
i 've learned how to play the game work the game be in the game
is it inevitable that the game plays you
no if you go with the flow tavis
that 's what a lot of negroes do n't understand
protesting is n't gon na do a damn thing
if people do n't like our satire in our number one hit show then do n't watch it
or better yet write your own show
do it better
do n't you feel that is a simplistic retort
i do n't know what a retort is but it 's simple
mantan the new millennium minstrel show is universal
it 's not just for negroes in compton or 125th in harlem
this is america
our ancestors helped build this country we got a right just like everybody else
i 'm not gon na box myself in
this show makes people think and they 're laughing at the same time
i admit that 's a very hard thing to do
quickly let 's go to the phones before we pay the bills and hear from our proud sponsors da bomb
125 pure pleasure malt liquor
it makes you wanna get ya freak on and timmi hillnigger
125 authentic git toe gear when you want to be git toed fabulous
this is my best friend sleep n eat
and this is my very best friend mantan
y'know my lady lucindy
the one with da big
not her the one with the little
oh her
tomorrow is her birthday and i want to get her something really nice like a
no not that
how 'bout
she hates dem
too bad
how 'bout a dress
sleep n eat one of dem slinky sexy little foxy
mantan way too short too tight
get her one of dose
... to big
the in between one not too tight not too lose
that 'll work
i just bought one for myself
not for me my woolly headed cotton pickin friend for
i thought you got rid of
... that was vicki her best friend
dat dress will cast ya round
... dat 's too much money
i ca n't ford it
i needs me a dress that cost no mo than
... aconite get it dat cheap
i 'll buy her a less expensive dress so i can have some money left over to take her out to dinner
we should go out on a double date
i heard ya lady is wild
no
that 's her second cousin
who 's married to li'l bit
oh because on our first date she let me
... no she did n't
... yes she did
... i heard different thought that was
... not that time
so when are you comin to pick us up
around
... too early
... then what about
... too late maybe around
... perfect
that 's what i like about you and me
we git along
... like macaroni and cheese
... like grits and butter
... like fried and chicken
i fell out of my bed last night
you slept too near where you got in
i slept too near where i fell out
you expect the unexpected in circumstances of that peculiarity
sleep n eat what 's the matter with you
using all dose ten dollar words
mantan it is possible that my hyphenated sentences are entirely too complex for all the intellect contained in that diminutive coconut
hold on you allegorical hypothesis
do n't cross words with me
ai n't jemima on the pancake box
dat 's yo uncle ben
that reminds me i 've seen a lot of troubles lately
how be dat
i do n't know who i am
well i 'll be an alabama porch monkey 's uncle
years ago i married a widow who had a grown up daughter
my daddy visited us often fell in love with my stepdaughter and married her
thusly he became my son in law and my stepdaughter became my mother because she was my father 's wife
soon after dis my wife gave birth to a son which of course was my father 's brother in law and my uncle for he was the brother of my step mother
my father 's wife also became the mother of a son
he was of course my brother and also my grandchild for he was the son of my daughter
accordingly my wife was my grandmother because she was my mother 's mother
sleep n eat i was my wife 's husband and grandchild at one and the same time
and lo and behold as the husband of a person 's grandmother is his grandfather i mantan became my own grandfather
mantan dat sho is a whopper
i feel a song a comin on
a song a comin i feel
so what 's up with you
what do you want to know
the good stuff
i 'm an asthmatic
been one all my life
ca n't go anywhere without an inhaler
what else
are you trying to rap to me
this is a nice place
it must have cost a pretty penny
sloan i got it like dat
oh you do huh
just a little something somethin'
i hope you save a little somethin' somethin'
gots no intention of ending up broke
y'know at the beginnin of the century african american had to perform in blackface
you ever heard of bert williams
he was a great artist
no before my time
you do n't read do you
never read a book in my whole life
maybe you need to start
maybe i need to do a lot of things
bert williams and the rest they had to black up
they had no choice
they were considered 3/5ths of a human being
did you know that 's written in the constitution of the united states
why all of a sudden are you flippin on me
this blackface thing was part of the deal from the git go
do n't even try to play it like you ai n't a part of all this
you down with delacroix
i just do n't want you and cheeba to get hurt
we can look out for ourselves
why do n't you call him
for what
he left
not me
you 're sure this is a good idea
my people love me
i 'll be down front
you better start putting your face on
y'know what
what
you look beautiful like that
how did you get this gig
worked my black ass off first as an intern then worked my way up to this position
you leave something out
after my internship expired dela was impressed and offered me a position as his assistant
and
and what
stop playing me sloan
just ask me what you want to know
oh you gon na make me say it
say what manray
did you ever sleep with dela
we did it one time only once
it had nothing to do with the job it was stupid
everything i 've got i 've earned
aw c'mon
that 's ancient history
that has nothing to do with you and i.
so you say
sloan you wuz gon na use me up just like you used dela
work it to the top
i never imagined people in this biz could flip on you like ihop
i 'm damn happy dela fired ya ass
forget about me are you a puppet for dela
do n't try to change to the subject
why do n't you answer
i know i wo n't be your puppet
you can go now
i wuz leaving anyway for good
both of us ride home with best here
i 'm not afraid of highwaymen
my man is armed and so am i.
you know the use of arms very well best and no one can doubt your courage but michael and i will see you home for all that
there 's nothing else for it
take your ground grogan -- twelve paces i suppose
ten sir and make them short ones do you hear captain grogan
do n't bully mr. best
here are the pistols
god bless you my boy and when i count three fire
hoity toity
john best what 's the matter here
i 'll tell you what it is mr. dugan
i have had enough of miss dugan here and your irish ways
i ai n't used to 'em sir
well well
what is it
we 'll make you used to our ways or adopt english ones
it 's not the english way for ladies to have two lovers and so mr. dugan i 'll thank you to pay me the sum you owe me and i resign all claims to this young lady
if she has a fancy for school boys let her take 'em sir
pooh
pooh
best you are joking
i never was more in earnest
my companion treated me with great civility and asked me a thousand questions about england which i answered as best i might
but this best i am bound to say was bad enough
i knew nothing about england and i invented a thousand stories which i told him described the king and the ministers to him said the british ambassador in berlin was my uncle and promised my acquaintance a letter of recommendation to him
what is your uncle 's name
o'grady
oh yes of course ambassador o'grady
this is a very good inn
shall we stop for dinner
this may be a very good inn for germany but it would not pass in old ireland
corbach is only a league off let us push on for corbach
do you want to see the loveliest woman in europe
ah
you sly rogue i see that will influence you
the place seems more a farm than an inn yard
the people are great farmers as well as inn keepers
where 's the beauty you promised me
it was my joke
i was tired and did not care to go farther
there 's not prettier woman here than that
if she wo n't suit your fancy my friend then you must wait awhile
upon my word sir i think you have acted very coolly
i have acted as i think fit
sir i 'm a british officer
it 's a lie
you 're a deserter
you 're an impostor sir your lies and folly have confirmed this to me
you pretend to carry dispatches to a general who has been dead these ten months you have an uncle who is an ambassador and whose name you do n't know
will you join and take the bounty sir or will you be given up
neither
you are a hungarian you served in the army and left on account of weakness in the loins
he gambles a great deal and wins
do you know the cards well
only a very little as soldiers do
i had thought you more expert
you must find out if the chevalier cheats
he sees the english and austrian envoys continually and the young men of either ministry sup repeatedly at his house
find out what they talk of for how much each plays especially if any of them play on parole
if you are able to read his private letters though about those which go to the post you need not trouble yourself -- we look at them there
but never see him write a note without finding out to whom it goes and by what channel or messenger
he sleeps with the keys of his dispatch box with a string around his neck -- twenty frederics if you get an impression of the keys
what are the chevalier 's intentions
i am not sure
the prince told him quite clearly that if he wished to have the money he would have to fight for it
has he sent the challenge yet
not yet but i believe he intends to
you say he drives after breakfast and before dinner
when he comes out to his carriage a couple of gendarmes will mount the box and the coachman will get his orders to move on
and his baggage
oh
that will be sent after him
i have a fancy to look into that red box which contains his papers you say and at noon after parade shall be at the inn
you will not say a word to any one there regarding the affair and will wait for me at the chevalier 's rooms until my arrival
we must force that box
you are a clumsy hound or you would have got the key long ago
this is a pretty way to recommend yourself to the family
the man that marries dorothy dugan must first kill me -- do you mind that
dorothy might love me or not as she likes but best will have to fight me before he marries her
faith i think you are a lad that 's likely to keep your word
a pretty day 's work of it you have made master roderick
knowing your uncle to be distressed for money and try and break off a match which will bring fifteen hundred a year into the family
best has promised to pay off the four thousand pounds which is bothering your uncle so
he takes a girl without a penny -- a girl that has been flinging herself at the head of every man in these parts these ten years past and missing them all and a boy who ought to be attached to your uncle as to your father
and so i am
and this is the return you make for his kindness
did n't he harbor you in his house when your father died and has n't he given you and your mother rent free your fine house of jamesville yonder
mark this come what will of it i swear i will fight the man who pretends to the hand of dorothy dugan
i 'll follow him if it 's into the church and meet him there
i 'll have his blood or he shall have mine
will you take my message to him and arrange the meeting
well if it must be it must
for a young fellow you are the most bloodthirsty i ever saw
no officer bearing his majesty 's commission can receive a glass of wine on his nose without resenting it -- fight you must and best is a huge strong fellow
he 'll give the better mark
i am not afraid of him
in faith i believe you are not for a lad i never saw more game in my life
give me a kiss my dear boy
you 're after my own soul
as long as jack grogan lives you shall never want a friend or a second
have you taken my message to him
the meeting is arranged
captain best is waiting for you now
my mare is saddled and ready who 's the captain 's second
your cousins go out with him
look here roderick my boy this is silly business
the girl will marry best mark my words and as sure as she does you 'll forget her
you are but a boy
best is willing to consider you as such
dublin 's a fine place and if you have a mind to take a ride thither and see the town for a month here are twenty guineas at your service
make best an apology and be off
a man of honor dies but never apologizes
i 'll see the captain hanged before i apologize
grogan gave me a wink of recognition but offered no public token of acquaintance and it was not until two days afterwards that he called me into his quarters and then shaking hands with me cordially gave me news which i wanted of my family
i had news of you in dublin
faith you 've begun early like your father 's son but i think you could not do better than as you have done
but why did you not write home to your poor mother
she has sent half a dozen letters to you in dublin
i suppose she addressed them to me in my real name by which i never thought to ask for them at the post office
we must write to her today and you can tell her that you are safe and married to brown bess
i see you are thinking of a certain young lady at duganstown
is miss dugan well
there 's only six miss dugans now
poor dorothy
good heavens
whatever
has she died of grief
she took on so at your going away that she was obliged to console herself with a husband
she is now mrs. john best
mrs. john best
was there another mr. john best
no the very same one my boy
he recovered from his wound
the ball you hit him with was not likely to hurt him
it was only made of tow
do you think the dugans would let you kill fifteen hundred a year out of the family
the plan of the duel was all arranged in order to get you out of the way for the cowardly englishman could never be brought to marry from fear of you
but hit him you certainly did roderick and with a fine thick plugget of tow and the fellow was so frightened that he was an hour in coming to
we told your mother the story afterwards and a pretty scene she made
the coward
he has paid off your uncle 's mortgage
he gave dorothy a coach- and six
that coward of a fellow has been making of your uncle 's family
faith the business was well done
your cousins michael and harry never let him out of their sight though he was for deserting to england until the marriage was completed and the happy couple off on their road to dublin
are you in want of cash my boy
you may draw upon me for i got a couple of hundred out of master best for my share and while they last you shall never want
mr. o'higgins i can not say how grateful i am for your timely assistance to my wife
i am only sorry that i was unable to prevent the villain from carrying off all her ladyship 's money and pearls
mr. o'higgins we are in your debt and rest assured sir you have friends in this house whenever you are in dublin
mister o'higgins i wonder if i know your good father
which o'higgins do you know
for i have never heard your name mentioned in my family
oh i am thinking of the o'higgins of redmondstown
general o'higgins was a close friend of my wife 's dear father colonel granby somerset
ah -- i see
no i 'm afraid mine are the o'higgins of watertown
i have heard of them
whom have i been harboring in my house
who are you sirrah
sirrah
sirrah i am as good a gentleman as any in ireland
you 're an impostor young man a schemer a deceiver
repeat the words again and i run you through the body
tut tut
i can play at fencing as well as you mr. roderick james
ah
you change color do you
your secret is known is it
you come like a viper into the bosom of innocent families you represent yourself as the heir to my friends the o'higgins of castle o'higgins i introduce you to the nobility and gentry of this methropolis i take you to my tradesmen who give you credit
i accept your note for near two hundred pounds and what do i find
a fraud
chevalier though i can not say how i believe you have cheated me
i deny your grace 's accusations and beg you to say how you have been cheated
i do n't know
your grace owes me seventy thousand frederics which i have honorably won
chevalier if you will have your money now you must fight for it
if you will be patient maybe i will pay you something another time
your grace if i am so tame as to take this then i must give up an honorable and lucrative occupation
i have said all there is to be said
i am at your disposal for whatever purposes you wish
good night
where is my rascal lazlo
i will let down the steps for your honor
good gracious
what is this
you are going to drive to the frontier
it is shameful -- infamous
i insist upon being put down at the austrian ambassador 's house
i have orders to gag your honor if you cry out and to give you this purse containing ten thousand frederics if you do not
ten thousand
but the scoundrel owes me seventy thousand
your honor must lower his voice
all europe shall hear of this
as you please
your name is lazlo zilagyi
yes sir
you come highly recommended by herr seebach
herr seebach was a very kind employer
for whom else have you worked
no one sir
before that i served in the army but had to leave due to weakness of the loins
who else can give me information about you
only the agency of servants
and i think he was as much affected as i was at thus finding one of his kindred for he too was an exile from home and a friendly voice a look brought the old country back to his memory again and the old days of his boyhood
i 'd give five years of my life to see the old country again the greenfields and the river and the old round tower and the burying place
the cards are now my only livelihood
sometimes i am in luck and then i lay out my money in these trinkets you see
it 's property look you and the only way i have found of keeping a little about me
when the luck goes against me why my dear my diamonds go to the pawnbrokers and i wear paste
do you understand the cards
i can play as soldiers do but have no great skill
we will practice in the mornings my boy and i 'll put you up to a thing or two worth knowing
but they will prevent a meeting at whatever the cost
have no fear
it will come out well for me
i believe they will deport you
i have faced that problem before
but if they send you away then what is to become of me
make your mind easy you shall not be left behind i warrant you
do take a last look at your barracks make your mind easy say a farewell to your friends in berlin
the dear souls how they will weep when they hear you are out of the country and out of it you shall go
but how sir
gentlemen i wish you a good day
will you please go to the house from whence we set out this morning and tell my man there to send my baggage on to three kings at dresden
then ordering fresh horses the chevalier set off on his journey for that capital
i need not tell you that i was the chevalier
when the duke of courland brought fourteen lackeys each with bags of florins and challenged our bank to play against the sealed bags what did we ask
sir we have but eighty thousand florins in bank or two hundred thousand at three months if your highness bags do not contain more than eight thousand we will meet you
it is distasteful to kill a scoundrel -- that should be work for a hangman
to risk one 's life against such people is an imposition
i risk nothing for i am certain to kill him
certain
perfectly certain because i shall make him tremble
i entered here monsieur at a bad moment for you it seems that you love this lady
certainly monseigneur does not your excellency consider her worthy of love
perfectly so and what is more i will tell you that i love her and that i am not of a humor to put up with rivals
very well
now that i know it i will no longer love her
then you yield to me
on the instant
everyone must yield to such a nobleman as you
very well but a man who yields takes to his legs
that is a trifle strong
take to your legs low irish dog
be so good as to tell me with whom you think you are
with a woman who is completely charming be she a princess or a woman of the lowest condition and who regardless of her rank will show me some kindness tonight
and if she does not choose to show you some kindness
then i will respectfully take leave of her
you will do as you please
it seems to me that such a matter can hardly be discussed until after people know each other
do you not agree
yes -- but i am afraid of being deceived
poor man
and for that reason you want to begin where people end
i ask only a payment on account today -- after that you will find me undemanding obedient and discreet
will we always leave it at this
always my dear one never any further
love is a child to be pacified with trifles
a full diet can only kill it
i know better than you do
love wants a more substantial fare and if it is stubbornly withheld it withers away
our abstinence makes our love immortal
if i loved you a quarter of an hour ago now i should love you even more
but i should love you less if you exhausted my joy by satisfying all my desires
let us give each other complete happiness and let us be sure that as many times as we satisfy our desires they will each time be born anew
my husband has convinced me of the contrary
sir william cosgrove is a man who is dying and yet i envy him more than any man in christendom
he enjoys a privilege of which i am deprived
he may take you in his arms whenever he pleases and no veil keeps his senses his eyes his soul from enjoying your beauty
shall i tell you something -- i believed what was called love came after the union -- and i was surprised when my husband making me a woman made me know it only by pain unaccompanied by any pleasure
i saw that my imaginings had stood me in better stead
and so we became only friends seldom sleeping together and arousing no curiosity in each other yet on good terms for a while as whenever he wanted me i was at his service but since the offering was not seasoned with love he found it tasteless and seldom demanded it
o my dearest love
enough
i beg you
stop believing in your experience
you have never known love
my very soul is leaving me
catch it on your lips and give me yours
without you my dearest i might have died without ever knowing love
inexpressible love
god of nature
bitterness than which nothing is sweeter sweetness than which nothing is more bitter
divine monster which can only be defined by paradoxes
let me give a thousand kisses to that heavenly mouth which has told me that i am happy
as soon as i saw you loved me i was pleased and i gave you every opportunity to fall more in love with me being certain that for my part i would never love you
but after our first kiss i found that i had no power over myself
i did not know that one kiss could matter so much
we then spent an hour in the most eloquent silence except that from time to time her ladyship cried out oh my god
is it true -- i am not dreaming
my lady cosgrove 's relationship with me was a singular one
her life was passed in a series of crack brained sort of alternation between love and hatred for me
we would quarrel for a fortnight then we should be friends for a month together sometimes
one day i was joking her and asking her whether she would take the water again whether she had found another lover and so forth
she suddenly burst out into tears and after a while said to me
roderick you know well enough that i have never loved but you
was i ever so wretched that a kind word from you did not make me happy
ever so angry but the least offer of good will on your part did not bring me to your side
did i not give a sufficient proof of my affection for you in bestowing one of the finest fortunes of england upon you
have i repined or rebuked you for the way you have wasted it
no i loved you too much and too fondly i have always loved you
from the first moment i saw you i saw your bad qualities and trembled at your violence but i could not help loving you
i married you though i knew i was sealing my own fate in doing so and in spite of reason and duty
what sacrifice do you want from me
i am ready to make any so you will but love me or if not that at least you will gently us me
lady cosgrove you are an old fool
old fool
i accept but i insist on a wager
the loser must do whatever the winner pleases
agreed
do you see the gate at the end of the field
the first to touch it will be the winner
i hate miss clancy you know i do
and i only danced with her because -- because -- the person with whom i intended to dance chose to be engaged the whole night
i had not been in the room five minutes before i was engaged for every single set
were you obliged to dance five times with captain best and then stroll out with him into the garden
i do n't care a fig for captain best he dances prettily to be sure and is a pleasant rattle of a man
he looks well in his regimentals too and if he chose to ask me to dance how could i refuse him
but you refused me dorothy
oh
i can dance with you any day and to dance with your own cousin at a ball as if you could find no other partner
besides roderick captain best 's a man and you are only a boy and you have n't a guinea in the world
if ever i meet him again you shall see which is the best man of the two
i 'll fight him with sword or with pistol captain as he is
but captain best is already known as a valiant soldier and is famous as a man of fashion in london
it is mighty well of you to fight farmers boys but to fight an englishman is a very different matter
suppose now roderick you who are such a hero was passing over the bridge and the enemy on the other side
i 'd draw my sword and cut my way through them
what with me on the pillion
would you kill poor me
well then i 'll tell you what i 'd do
i 'd jump daisy into the river and swim you both across where no enemy could follow us
jump twenty feet
you would n't dare to do any such thing on daisy
there 's the captain 's horse black george i 've heard say that captain bes --
monster
your father was a tailor and you are always thinking of the shop
but i 'll have my revenge i will
roddy will you see me insulted
indeed miss dorothy i intend to have his blood as sure as my name 's roderick
i am at your service mr. cosgrove
how much do you wish to spend
as much as possible
as much as possible
yes for i wish to entertain splendidly
all the same you must name an amount
it is entirely up to you
i want the best
last month the duke of suffolk spent no more
all right five hundred guineas
and to be sure i did know someone who knew precisely how these things were done and this was the distinguished solicitor and former government minister lord west whose acquaintance i made as i had so many others at the gaming table
do you happen to know gustavus adolphus the thirteenth earl of crabs
by name only
well sir this nobleman is one of the gentlemen of his majesty 's closet and one with whom our revered monarch is on terms of considerable intimacy
i should say you would be wise to fix upon this nobleman your chief reliance for the advancement of your claim to the viscounty which you propose to get
have you done mr. cosgrove
yes
well mr. cosgrove i 'll answer you point by point
the king is exceedingly averse to make peers as you know
your claim as you call them have been laid before him and his majesty 's gracious reply was that you were the most impudent man in his dominions and merited a halter rather than a coronet
as for withdrawing your support from us you are perfectly welcome to carry yourself whithersoever you please
and now as i have a great deal of occupation perhaps you will do me the favor to retire or tell me if there is anything else in the world in which i can oblige you
does this assignment interest you
yes minister i am interested in any work in which i can be of service to captain galgenstein
the king has determined to send the chevalier out of the country
when is he to go
then this must be done tomorrow
what is to be done
what has happened madam to annoy your ladyship
oh i am grateful to you sir
i am the wife of captain o'reilly hastening to join him at dublin
my chair was stopped by a highwayman this great oaf of a servant man fell down on his knees armed as he was and though there were thirty people in the next field working when the ruffian attacked not one of them would help but on the contrary wished him good luck
be off to your work you pack of rascals or you will have a good taste of my thong
have you lost much
everything -- my purse containing upwards of a hundred guineas my jewels my snuff boxes watches
and all because this blundering coward fell to his knees
that fool did n't know what was the meaning of a hundred pound bill which was in the pocket book that the fellow took from me
i am riding to dublin myself and if your ladyship will allow me the honor of riding with you i shall do my best to protect you from further mishap
but i should n't like to put you to such trouble mister
o'higgins
mohawk o'higgins
as you have been robbed of your purse may i have permission to lend your ladyship a couple of pieces to pay any expenses which you might incur before reaching your home
that 's very kind of you mr. o'higgins
how different was her lively rattle to the vulgar wenches at kilwangan assemblies
in every sentence she mentioned a lord or a person of quality
to the lady 's question about my birth and parentage i replied that i was a young gentleman of large fortune that i was going to dublin for my studies and that my mother allowed me five hundred per annum
you must be very cautious with regard to the company you should meet in dublin where rogues and adventurers of all countries abound
i hope you will do me the honor of accepting lodgings in my own house where captain o'reilly will welcome with delight my gallant young preserver
i have good news for you mr. cosgrove
the firm of bracegirdle and chatwick in the city of london are prepared to lend you 20,000 pounds pledged against your interest in the edric mines
they will redeem the encumbrances against the property which amount to some 10,000 pounds and take a twenty- year working lease on the mines
they will lend you the 20,000 pounds against the lease income which they will apply to the loan as it comes in and they will make a charge of 18 per annum interest on the outstanding loan balance
mr. newcombe i have made some difficult loans during the past few years at very onerous terms but 18 a year interest seems very stiff indeed
considering your financial circumstances mr. cosgrove it has been impossible to find anyone at all prepared to do any business with you
i think you may count yourself lucky to have this opportunity
but obviously if you would reject this offer i shall keep trying to find a better one
i am prepared to accept the terms mr. newcombe
there are a few other points we should discuss
the loan agreement can only be executed by her ladyship 's signature and provided that bracegirdle and chatwick can be assured of her ladyship 's freewill in giving her signature
provided that they can be assured of her ladyship 's freewill
are you serious
may i be quite frank with you
yes of course
mister bracegirdle said to me that he had heard her ladyship lives in some fear of her life and meditated a separation in which case she might later repudiate any documents signed by herself while in durance and subject them at any rate to a doubtful and expensive litigation
they were quite insistent on this point and said they must have absolute assurance of her ladyship 's perfect freewill in the transaction before they would advance a shilling of their capital
i see
when i asked them in what form they would accept her ladyship 's assurances they said that they were only prepared to accept them if her ladyship confirms her written consent by word of mouth in their presence at their counting house in birchin lane london
i requested they come here and save her ladyship and yourself the inconvenience of the trip to london but they declined saying that they did not wish to incur the risk of a visit to castle hackton to negotiate as they were aware of how other respectable parties such as messrs. sharp and salomon had been treated here
i promise your lordship a good flogging if you even so much as go to doolan 's farm to see him
yes papa
your bother is in america fighting the rebels
is he all right papa
yes he 's fine
brooksy was better than you papa he used not to swear so and he taught me many good things while you were away
i made sir william cosgrove 's acquaintance as usual at the play- table
one could not but admire the spirit and gallantry with which he pursued his favorite pastime for though worn out with gout and a myriad of diseases a cripple wheeled about in a chair and suffering pangs of agony yet you would see him every morning and every evening at his post behind the delightful green cloth
hang it mr. roderick james you have no more manners than a barber and i think my black footman has been better educated than you but you are a young fellow of originality and pluck and i like you sir
because you seem determined to go to the devil by a way of your own
indeed you are right sir
look at me
marriage has added forty years to my life
i am dying a worn out cripple at the age of fifty
when i took off lady cosgrove there was no man of my years who looked so young as myself
fool that i was
i had enough with my pensions perfect freedom the best society in europe -- and i gave up all these and married and was miserable
take a warning from me mr. roderick and stick to the trumps
do anything but marry
would you have me spend my life all alone
in truth sir yes but if you must marry then marry a virtuous drudge
the milkmaid 's daughter
well why not a milkmaid 's daughter
no man of sense need restrict himself or deny himself a single amusement for his wife 's sake on the contrary if he selects the animal properly he will choose such a one as shall be no bar to his pleasure but a comfort in his hours of annoyance
for instance i have got the gout who tends me
a hired valet who robs me whenever he has the power
my wife never comes near me
what friend have i
none in the wide world
men of the world as you and i are do n't make friends and we are fools for our pains
sir william cosgrove with his complication of ills was dying before us by inches
he was continually tinkered up by doctors and what with my usual luck he might be restored to health and live i do n't know how many years
if cosgrove would not die where was the use of my pursing his lady
but my fears were to prove groundless for on that very night patient nature would claim her account
good evening mr. james have you done with my lady
i beg your pardon
come come sir
i am a man who would rather be known as a cuckold than a fool
i think sir william cosgrove you have had too much drink
your chaplin mr. hunt has introduced me into the company of your lady to advise me on a religious matter of which she is a considerable expert
gentlemen see this amiable youth
he has been troubled by religious scruples and has flown for refuge to my chaplin mr. hunt who has asked for advise from my wife lady cosgrove and between them both they are confirming my ingenious young friend in his faith
did you ever hear of such doctors and such a disciple
faith sir if i want to learn good principles it 's surely better i should apply for them to your lady and your chaplin than to you
he wants to step into my shoes
he wants to step into my shoes
well if my intentions are what you think they are -- if i do wish to step into your shoes what then
i have no other intentions than you had yourself
lady cosgrove 's wealth may be great but am i not of a generous nature enough to use it worthily
her rank is lofty but not so lofty as my ambition
i will be sworn to muster just as much regard for my lady cosgrove as you ever showed her and if i win her and wear her when you are dead and gone corbleu knight do you think that it will be the fear of your ghost will deter me
is it not a pleasure gentlemen for me as i am drawing near the goal to find my home such a happy one my wife so fond of me that she is even now thinking of appointing a successor
is n't it a comfort to see her like a prudent housewife getting everything ready for her husband 's departure
i hope that you are not thinking of leaving us soon knight
not so soon my dear as you may fancy perhaps
why man i have been given over many times these four years and there was always a candidate or two waiting to apply for the situation
who knows how long i may keep you waiting
sir let those laugh that win
i am sorry for you mr. james
i 'm grieved to keep you or any gentleman waiting
had you not better to arrange with my doctor or get the cook to flavor my omelette with arsenic
what are the odds gentlemen that i do n't live to see mr. james hang yet
charming schuvaloff
black eyed sczortarska
dark valdez
do you expect me to believe that your lover brought you here tonight
yes
he brought me in his carriage and he will call for me at midnight
and he does n't care about me
he is only curious to know who you are
if his love were like mine he would not permit you to come here
he loves me as i love you
will he wish to know the details of this night
he will believe that it will please me if he asks about it and i shall tell him everything except some circumstances which might humiliate him
tender hegenheim
hurricane kept you up too
yeah and i could 've used the sleep
i 'm supposed to meet people here tonight try and get some work going
bill styles
who
old friend
have n't talked to him in -- 911
can i use your phone
do n't you ever point a gun at me
i 'm -- i 'm sorry
a target kendall cap a fucking target
what 's wrong with you
i thought i was gon na have an attack
go into a fit and bite off my own tongue in the middle of the bayou
childs could tell i was n't right
just safety your shit and get behind me okay
i 'll take care of this
fuck what the fuck is going on --
what do we do
whoever it is is n't shooting at us
i do n't want to go --
fine
did -- did you --
it was the grenade you fucking idiot
look at him
what about pike
maybe he 'll be there
either way we have to go
this is n't our area
whose area is this --
can anybody hear me
hey i -- holy fuck
holy fuck what the fuck did you guys do
we found him like this --
you killed him you fucking faggot --
we found him like this
kendall was with me the whole -- listen to me
we got -- i do n't know we got separated
before or after the explosion
mueller --
i do n't know
shut the fuck up you fucking faggot you just shut the fuck up
hey
west was one thing but this --
shut up mueller
we finished the course and came here then heard an explosion -- where 's pike
we do n't know
west is dead
what about you wandering around alone
at least we have an alibi --
what do you mean alone
you too
we can still come out of this okay
pike got free he got a gun he came after us
that 's the story
why not
i asked for a policeman
you 're under military arrest it 's not gon na happen
what 's wrong with baseball
it 's
too slow
well it 's a game of anticipation that 's the beauty
i just do n't like it
what do you like then
i do n't know
i like the army
c'mon ray everyone hates the army during basic
i 'll tell you straight i hated it here
you did basic here
fifteen years ago under sergeant west
piece of work that guy
i remember he used to have these two silver
45 's with ivory handles and if you were n't quick enough he 'd knock you on the head with one of them
he still carry those guns
there 's no need
they 're dead are n't they
right
now i 'm gon na go get you another donut and you think about whether you want to talk more okay
okay
why 'd you ask for a cop ray
i 'm not telling you what happened
okay
but i would like to know about the other cadets
what they were like -- nice guys
some
tell me about them
and those were the guys who went on the exercise with you
yeah
and that 's all i 'm saying
fuck you 're serious raymond you got exactly zero truck with us right now we 'd take the word of a crackhead over yours so if you 've got something to say say it
did kendall tell you about the px
so childs made some side money so what
people are dead ray and the only one we have to blame is you --
i did n't shoot west --
yeah we know pike did
i apologize --
you saw west 's body
of course --
and he 'd been shot
yeah --
you shot childs and nunez
they would have killed us both
you want me to write a confession i 'll write a confession
you saved kendall 's life --
but not pike 's
raymond for you to have any chance of coming out of this we need to locate the other bodies and examine them to corroborate your testimony
otherwise this is just another story --
mr. hardy i joined the army for college money
i did n't ask for any of this -- i tried to do the right thing out there and people got killed
you say finding those bodies'll help me then go find them
i do n't want to die
we 're not finished yet --
you wanna bet
we do n't need the tapes --
oh you do n't
what else do you have on me
you have n't found any bodies yet have you
we 've found all of them
i guess nunez was n't dead after all
he came after us with a vengeance
you know the rest
and the bodies
you wo n't find them
wo n't find west either
he 's too good
i promised them i 'd ask you where west and the others are
washout rejects guys he said were dumbfucks too stupid to know they dead
he 's telling the truth up to a point
are you saying sergeant west tried to kill you
no ma'am he just wanted us to quit
making it through was kind of an honor
some of the other guys on the base told us that if you could hack section eight command would consider you at the top of the class
that first night with pike
i made the mistake of letting him sit down at around 0300
tell us about the other guys the ones west weeded out
there were six of us
he was sickly
had that shaking thing whatd'yacall it epoxy
epilepsy
yeah
spent half his time in the infirmary
only reason he enlisted was his father
west did n't section him till last week
he said he worked there --
no did he tell you about it
about the business childs ran
what business
pills shots you name it basic 's a lot easier when you do n't feel pain --
where
the creek bed --
what about the phosphorous grenade
one went off yeah but it did n't touch him -- i thought you knew this --
where 's the cabin
do n't know on a map
west told us it was there we just found it
maybe the hurricane took it away
you kept kendall alive to corroborate your story and he did it all they way up to the end
you even gave him his own motive in case we decided to burn him too
ca n't do that now though can you
is that what i did now
and of course you can prove all of it
we can prove that you 're not ray dunbar
impersonating a fellow cadet is a court martial in and of itself --
did i ever claim i was raymond dunbar
was i ever told to state my name rank and serial number for the record
no
you assumed who i was because i was wearing this uniform
do n't believe me
ohhhh i do n't think so
how do you know that
just a guess
maybe they 're not where they 're supposed to be
maybe somebody moved them
habeas corpus -- no bodies no crime and nunez still plays as self defense
face it detectives
you have nothing
cadet what 's your name
sir dunbar sir
you know how to work a pistol dunbar
sir yes sir
dunbar you are to stand here and guard this nigger for the next twenty- four hours
he is not to be given food water or clothes
if he so much as moves you are to blow his nigger brains out is that clear
sir yes sir
the rest of you fallout for physicals
what the fuck is going on
your weapons sergeant
he would n't kill anybody
oh bullshit he 's a fucking convict
you know how much he hated west --
i hated west childs hated west everyone with a goddamn brain hated west but that does n't mean we killed him
pike and i got separated
then i heard gunfire
close
so did we
why did n't you come
so you killed him
i
whose blood is that jay
west 's
any kindling for afire
what do you mean west 's
i mean i killed him
is n't that what we all wanted
where have you been jay
wandering through a hurricane trying to find this place
it 's gettin bad out there -- where 's west
roberto what the fuck
we just want to check your pack --
why
you know it 's not like that --
do i
right
yeah
you hated west mueller loved him --
enough to go to prison
childs px scam mueller was in on it --
bullshit
look in my pack
why
just look
little pocket
combat grade morphine
mueller sold it to me
you 're lying --
pull up my sleeve
right arm
why
why did n't you tell me
becoming a morphine addict during basic ai n't exactly something you want to broadcast
only mueller and childs know
that still does n't mean you did n't kill him
you saw west right
how was he killed
full clip to the body --
from up close or far away
his chest was hamburger --
that 's close range
you go full auto on a guy from close range you 're gon na be swimming in blood
look at my uniform
nothing
way i figure it west must have found out about their little business and was gon na bust them so they decided to get rid of him first
they
mueller and childs
one of them must 've taken the grenade from my pack on the chopper
i
i do n't know
what do n't you know
this is a lot of information to be getting
i have to think --
there 's no time to think ray we got ta get out of here
you untie me we grab the guns get kendall and nunez and make a run for it --
no
no we can just wait till we get back and then tell the m.p. 's --
we wait and i 'm a dead man
i got a black face a criminal record and over a hundred other cadets who 'll testify how much i hated west -- my court martial will take six minutes
it 's either me or them ray and you got ta decide right now
a test will no doubt link you to the killing --
put it down
i 've done nothing wrong
i 'm the victim here
but not the only victim right
my my my how did things turn so hostile so quickly
if i did n't know better i 'd say you two were out to get me
my father is a powerful man
over the years he 's used that power to protect me in one form or another from certain
unpleasantries
i am a homosexual
senator daddy must be thrilled
he is not shall we say wild about the idea
he has asked me on numerous occasions to be more discreet about my proclivities and i have done my best to oblige him
however in the last four weeks i began a relationship with another cadet
what do you think of that
i think you just blew do n't ask do n't tell out of the fucking water
the sergeant discovered this relationship and wanted me expelled
my father interceded so instead west sectioned me and made sure every other cadet knew that i was gay
levi i do n't know if you 're familiar with investigative work but we have this little thing called motive and you just gave yourself one
you said you wanted to know what happened -- i 'm telling you the truth
what happened to degrees
i did n't kill him --
then who did
maybe i should n't tell you that
maybe i should tell you i was n't scared at all
but i was
enough to almost kill him
but you did n't
no
poetic justice though
he admitted it
right in front of us
mueller went after him but we held him back
why did he come back for you
i honestly do n't know
maybe to have someone to cover for him
and i wish i could but there 's no doubt in my mind he killed those men
okay
i think that 's it
he rises and walks to the door
mr. hardy
somebody emptied a full clip into him --
stop
is it the truth
there 's that word again
as i told you i was n't in the room when everyone started shooting
why did you tell us he shot everybody levi
you put him in for three murders the man saved your life --
so i should stay silent about his misdeeds
the guns went off i ran in childs shot me pike and mueller were dead and dunbar was running out the door with the smoking gun --
dunbar was running out the door
ohhhhhh
see that 's where i was confused because i thought you said nunez was running out the door
no
i said dunbar
huh
you know i really thought you said nunez
i thought you said dunbar was gone my fault i got ta check the tape on that
oh yeah we taped the last interview
this one too
cause it 'd be a real break for us to catch you in a lie
i believe your next line is what are you trying to hide
well
sorry to disappoint
i 'm on painkillers for the injury -- they cloud the mind
you 're right it was nunez
any more questions
dunbar will testify that you were
then we 'll leave it up to the courts -- his word against mine
what does his father do again
steelworker
does n't matter i 'm sure justice will be served
in any case my father will definitely want to talk to you about all these questions these accusations on his son
he 's quite protective
something funny levi
i was just thinking of what 's going to happen to your careers when my father gets through with you
jail if he 's lucky the gas chamber if he 's not --
i did n't do anything --
why
because of what i saw
who really killed west
how do you know
because i was standing next to him
how are you
been better
i read about what 's been happening with you
i should have called --
what kind of trouble are you in
that bad
would i have called you if it was n't
if there was any other way --
tell me what i can do
this is warrant officer julia osborne the closest thing we have to an in- house investigator
and here you are going out of house
how 's that make you feel jules
the official term for it is clusterfuck
by the time beth hit us i 'd canceled all off base exercises save one -- a six man cadet team and their drill out in the bush
we 're missing three and the sergeant
the cadets are in their eighth week of the cycle nobody here knows much about them up to and including their names
but the sergeant
it 's not west is it
tell me it 's not west
a few years ago the army picked our good buddy as their go to non com to trot out to the press to talk about the kinder gentler military
he even did the standard video greeting played to all incoming basic cadets across the country
well he 's a good soldier
the exercise was one of his section eight private sessions
left around 2100 yesterday and were scheduled for pick up at 0630 this morning
and the problem is you only got three
no the problem is one 's dead one 's got a bullet in his arm and one wo n't talk
the one who wo n't talk was trading live fire with the dead one as we reached the pick up
i 'm assuming that 's what made him the dead one
cadet roberto r. nunez
killed right in front of me
which gives us about five hours
why 'd you call me
the guy in interrogation said he 'd only talk to a cop
and i 'm the closest thing to it right
tom bottom line i let those kids go out there
if jag shows up and i do n't have any answers for them my career is finished --
i 'm not gon na let that happen
we 've already been over the terrain twice
nothing
there was a hurricane bill the wind probably moved it
habeas corpus -- you have to have a body to have a crime
okay then let 's widen the search to include the endzone in giants stadium and the trunk of my car --
without the body we have no physical proof
we need a confession
from dunbar
i hate to break this to you but i do n't think he 's gon na be all that psyched to put himself in for the death penalty
nevertheless --
nevertheless what
kendall will testify and that 'll be enough
not for me
you mean not enough to save you
jag gets here in three hours
try for the confession
tom where are you going --
home i 'm done
what about the confession
you want a confession
why do n't you confess bill people are dead and you do n't give a shit about it
only reason you called me is to protect your fucking job you know this is your fault --
what the hell are you talking about --
i 'm talking about west
we had him bill we were there
you 're the fucking base commander you knew what he did to cadets and you let him go on the way he always he has --
what i said before --
was dead right
you think dunbar 's on the level
yeah
does osborne agree
it 's over
time of death was 4:42
jag 's been notified and i called the senator myself
my report will reflect that his medical condition made this unavoidable
you two had no culpability in the matter
that 's horseshit and you know it
maybe
but it 's my fault and i 'll carry it
you think you could explain all this to me
i would n't know where to start
i guess it was about one man framing another
he thought if the other guy got blamed people would over look his own wrong doings
they 're taking your command are n't they
the senator
stay where you are
or what
you 've gone round the bend --
west had a partner
someone who knew how to get things done
what i ca n't understand is why you signed these
if you 'd just let west take care of the paperwork no one would have known but you got careless
so when pike finally told the truth you had to get rid of him too
that 's preposterous --
toxicology report came back
kendall 's attack was caused by a drug known as anephadrine maybe you 've heard of it
it 's for asthmatics
if an epileptic takes enough it kills them
i checked with the nurses at the hospital -- you 're the only other person who visited kendall
i wanted to see if he was okay --
you poisoned him bill
you heard our interrogation you knew he was ready to crack so you killed him just like pike
i 'm not even going to dignify that --
no
you will stand there and you will listen
what happened to you bill
you were the one who joined up to do good in the world
you were the one who believed in it --
you want to get into a finger pointing contest about character
the army kicked you out for drugs the cops fired you for taking bribes from a mobster and you think you can stand there and lecture me on codes of conduct
there 's only one criminal standing in this room and it 's you
not for long
no more witnesses
west 's a ghost
but it does n't matter because we have your signature the hospital log and kendall 's toxicology report
and that 'll be enough
you 're crazy --
you ca n't duck this bill
i may have done every goddamn thing in my life wrong but i wo n't let this happen
for the last time i have no idea what you 're talking about --
get your hands away from the desk
hostile and uncooperative
fantastic
you want to tell me what 's going on
ah christ
you knew sergeant west
he was our drill here
man 's older than sand
i did n't mean that as a compliment
sergeant west 's served for twenty- three years
he 's the public face of the modern army
and you notice i 'm not in the army anymore
got ta be honest i love what you 've done with the place --
you and the colonel go back
he got me through basic and a lot of other stuff
i owe him
you 're the tom hardy i 've been reading about in the papers right
new orleans pd fired you for taking bribes from guissepe torres
it was for suspicion of bribery it 's really all in the wording --
wording and your friendship with the colonel aside i 'm not comfortable having you involved in this
subtlety really is n't one of you finer points is it osborne
three things
first -- you do n't have a choice
second -- i 've never taken a bribe in my life
and third -- i 'm still a little drunk from last night so if i skip over the witty banter and move forward to straight hitting on you try not to take offense
tell me about the two guys
hurricane knocked out our mainframe so all we have are their dogtags
cadets raymond dunbar and levi kendall --
levi
who names their kid levi --
senator jonathan kendall of ohio
christ
remind me to thank bill for mentioning that on the phone --
kendall junior is still in surgery so he wo n't be available to answer for his name or anything else for another hour -- the cadet we 're talking to first is dunbar
he 's in interrogation
yes
move him
why
because interrogation rooms look suspiciously like interrogation rooms which does n't exactly put people at ease
is he cute
excuse me
is dunbar cute
that is the most unprofessional --
is he handsome self assured carry himself well does he look you in the eyes or down at the floor does he have good bones suggesting good breeding does he slouch or sit up straight -- these are important questions as they reveal a great deal about this man 's character so please get over yourself for two and a half seconds and tell me is he cute
the colonel saw you shoot nunez you 're a murderer --
see ray this is what we call good cop bad cop
she shouts i stand up for you you 're grateful a bond of trust is established
baseball
i believe somebody owes me ten dollars --
you made me look like an idiot --
oh i 'm sorry i did n't know the object of the interrogation is to make you look good -- everyone knows good cop bad cop -- by admitting it i appeared trustworthy
you really want to make banal chit- chat like that now
you 're right
we should sit in silence
we 're in the middle of a murder case --
best time for banal chit chat
what is that
microrecorder for kendall -- did n't have time to wire his room
now tell me why you joined the army or i 'll jab this pen through your neck
typical army brat story
dad was noncom mom was a nurse
there was never any real doubt of joining up
you had a mobile of bayonets above your crib
something like that
you
i lost a bet
you 're kidding
yeah
that 's just the story i tell the girls to get them into bed
truth is
i do n't know
the whole honor and duty thing
make a difference in the world crap like that
did n't really work out
this is the straight hitting on me you were talking about is n't it
the very same
you do understand that there 's absolutely no way i could ever be attracted to you right
i plan to grow on you
you 're off to a late start
so noted
you guys really got the shit kicked out of you here
imagine what it must have been like for them out there
what do you think of dunbar
he 's telling the truth up to a point
what point
that was kid gloves
have no fear osborne we have not yet begun to fight
but we have to question him -- thought you did n't have cigarettes --
i lied
wait for it
too neat
how long have you been an investigator
i do n't think that has anything to do with --
that means under a year
let me explain what ten years of police work has taught me -- murder is basic
there are no conspiracies no grand mysteries and no evil puppet masters behind it all pulling the strings murder is shitty people doing a shitty thing to other shitty people -- it does n't always make sense but it 's always neat
dunbar 's our guy
i just
he came back for kendall
i do n't think he 's capable of murder
everyone 's capable of murder osborne
look all we 've got is what kendall says and he did n't actually witness any deaths except nunez
he found west he saw mueller and pike but just their bodies -- he did n't see any crime committed
well i 'm sure if he 'd known this was all going to happen he 'd have tried harder to witness it for you --
why the fuck was n't he in restraints
i do n't know
styles could n't reassign him he 's a legend --
you knew what he was capable of and you just stood by
it was just a matter of time till somebody fragged his ass and you know what
he deserved it
there 's your confession
goddammit hardy you ca n't just leave --
watch me
you said you owed styles and now you 're gon na turn your back on him
why do you care
because it 's my job
because people are dead
because of the whole honor and duty thing make a difference in the world crap like that
we can do this hardy
i did n't shoot west
what
dunbar
he said he did n't shoot west
west was n't shot kendall said he was blown apart by a phosphorous grenade and dunbar never saw the body
at least you and kendall agree on that
what happened next
talk it through childs mueller and nunez know they 're going out on the regular tuesday night drill hurricane or no hurricane so they plan it kill west pin it on pike
and they 're smart about it
they know when you commit a crime you know is going to be investigated you need a fall guy and for that to work you have to have a witness
dunbar
exactly someone who 's not involved who 's word ca n't be questioned
you only let them see what you want them to see you make them believe so when the time comes they 've totally bought into your version of events
they believe the innocent are guilty and the guilty are innocent
and if they 're asked that 's what they 'll tell the world
so it 's a good plan but it goes wrong mueller flips out and shoots their fall guy which means they have to bring dunbar and kendall into the cover story --
kendall maybe would have agreed but the hurricane buttfucks the cabin --
buttfucks the cabin
and all hell breaks loose
a lot of good guys shoot a lot of bad guys and whiz bang zoom happy ending
so why after dunbar drags kendall out from under a house does the senator 's son try and get us to put his savior in the gas chamber
that bugs you too
little bit
let 's go talk to bill
we 're fucked i know --
they got their stories straight
what
what kendall said -- the type of guys you do n't feel comfortable going to sleep around
that 's what dunbar said about childs to the letter
are you sure
positive
hardy they planned this
why do n't you talk to levi off the record for a second
good idea
that 's a fantastic idea --
see i just take your gun to the morgue and fire it into one of their skulls then i call every newspaper in the country with the story about how senator kendall 's gay son went nuts on a training mission --
i pushed him too hard
you could n't have known --
yeah i could 've
should 've
you wanted to get the truth
no i did n't
i wanted to humiliate him
for what he did to dunbar
for fucking over the little guy
you mean the falsely accused
you know you never told me why you left the army
it dawned on me one day that we were supposed to be a nation founded on the principle of questioning authority
and all i did here was follow orders
it did n't add up
plus i got kicked out
for what
that 's gon na stay my secret
we were close to something with kendall
maybe
maybe we were nowhere near
sometimes mysteries stay mysteries
i have n't by any chance grown on you have i
no
good just making sure
four --
get in
we got maybe three minutes till they break it down
right back where we started
hardy what are you doing --
is n't this how your story goes
we can tie you to the chair if it 'll work better for you --
hardy for chrissakes --
where 's west 's body
no bodies no west
no death certificates
no crime
we need to talk --
seven
that 's not true
there are degrees of truth officer
always degrees
you 're a good man hardy
really
far as i 'm concerned whatever you did in the past can stay in the past
west
nobody saw
but i do n't think so
do i have a choice in this
yeah
i can wait till you 're off the base and do it myself
what are you doing out here
leaving without saying goodbye
what are you gon na do
go home get drunk and try and forget this ever happened
think it 'll work
nah
want company
a word of advice about women -- that first hour or so after they kill their boss
probably not the best time to hit on them
i should probably write that down
yeah
your phone number
in case you need me to testify about the shooting
they 'll clear you
he was your friend
yeah
but he was a lot of other things too
thanks
the thing is we 've got a real opportunity here
you turn me in tomorrow and we 're both fucked --
what are you talking about
a gay senator 's son who let his sarge get fragged on a training exercise
the press'll crucify you and your father
his career will be over and it 'll be your fault
but we do this different and you come out a hero
maybe we should n't go
the faggot speaks
you ever been in a hurricane mueller
you ever been in a hurricane mueller
we should tell him we 're not going
oh yeah excuse me sergeant sir we do n't feel like going out -- we do n't want to get rained on
he 'll kick our asses from here to cleveland
they found him
poor fucker was practically blown in half --
poor fucker my ass
you better watch it faggot i 'm not sure you and childs did n't do him --
pike and i got separated --
yeah and he does n't know when --
i remember now it was before the explosion --
oh you remember now --
i 'm about two seconds away from seeing if fairies really can fly --
i was freezing from the hurricane --
so you took off your shirt
to start a fire goddammit
what about him huh
maybe he offed the sarge and changed shirts brought an extra one in his pack
y'ever think of that
go ahead cut him loose
first chance he gets he 'll waste the rest of us that 's how they work --
we just want --
what the truth
please
there are degrees of truth officer always degrees
things are not what they seem
he could n't kick you out so he wanted you to quit on your own
he wanted more than that
he said what
you 're gon na die tonight faggot
clear as day
no one else heard it
he whispered it in my ear
running out of time are we
tick- tock tick tock how long till your witnesses fly the coop
fifty minutes
not much time to solve the crime
tell me detective how did it feel taking blood money from guissepe torres
did it weigh on your conscience or did you just not think about it
pike never confessed
no but it got you interested did n't it
got you to dig
inspired ray to tell you terribly sordid tales about drugs and creek beds and dead little sergeants who stuck their noses where they did n't belong
dunbar says you were
then he 's mistaken
you know i really do n't think my father would approve of this line of questioning --
you and dunbar got your stories straight
little details little inconsistencies designed to bounce us back from one of you to the other asking questions killing time until the transport arrives and whisks you away to where senator daddy can protect you
you think you 're just going to slide out of this
you 're an accessory to murder levi you 're going to jail --
you ca n't threaten me --
it does n't matter levi
we 're going to find those bodies and when we do i 'm going to make sure one of them has a bullet in them that matches your weapon --
what
it wo n't work --
it will and you know why
because you 're not a person anymore you 're a cadet in the united states army you have no identity no miranda warning and no rights
so i 'm gon na throw you to the wolves and unlike you i 'm gon na get away with it because you 're pissing me off
enjoy your flight to washington --
wait --
what
dunbar 's telling the truth
wrong answer --
we did get our stories straight but not because we killed anyone
it was because i threatened him
what happened with nunez
he came after us
and i told dunbar he had to kill him
hurricane 's due after midnight and we 're still going out
toughens us up pike
you do n't like it quit
what the fuck happened to you --
what the fuck happened to you
one minute you 're next to me and the next you 're gone and the sky lights up like fucking christmas --
whoever shot the sarge blew a grenade first --
blame the nigger then huh
someone turns up dead you just look for the darkest face in the crowd --
thank god
what the fuck are you doing
this place is going mueller
we got ta move --
shut the fuck up
he was gon na cut him loose
we all know what you did pike
i do n't know what kind of nigger voodoo you been working in here but --
where 's your shirt mueller
i used it to start the fire --
still got mine on not a speck of blood on it
not a bad trick for a murderer -- you said you burned yours
goddammit ray we got ta get out of here --
we 're not going anywhere
sign here and here
hey ai n't you the folks workin on that whole hulabaloo from last night
yeah
terrible tragedy
one of those section eight boys worked in here
pike
heard he got out okay
funny
i swear i saw them bring him and the smaller guy in this morning
no no that was cadet dunbar --
you mean ray dunbar
well that ai n't right
so
ma'am ray dunbar 's black
this is totally unnecessary --
he asked to see a policeman we 're getting him a policeman
but this guy you called he 's not even army --
he 's former army and the best i 've ever seen in a room
besides he knows the territory we did basic together here
you 've had three hours with dunbar and have n't gotten a peep we need to take a different tack
he 's not army it 's not official --
then it 's unofficial
search parties for the others are fanning out in a ten click radius from the pickup
if they 're hurt and we can get to them in time
i called the jag corps the two cadets we retrieved are to be flown to d.c. on a transport leaving here at 1700 --
you think he did it
no --
what do you think
it 's too neat
you want kendall do n't you
he tried to burn dunbar to us
you do n't do that if you 're not involved
you never told me why you got kicked out of
the army kicked you out for drugs
you motherfuckers have just made the worst mistake of your lives
you have chosen to join my army
this army is my mother my father and my little virgin sister and i will not allow anyone or anything that is not up to my standards near her pretty little virgin cooze do you understand me -- give me a sir yes sir
sir yes sir
those who i deem unworthy to pass through this camp will quit and those who refuse to quit i will kill
you ever hear of a training accident -- give me a sir yes sir
sir yes sir
in my time i have killed sixteen men for the good of my country sixteen men whose entrance into this army i could not condone as it would weaken the fabric of this nation 's defense
this base suffers an average of three training accidents a year unfortunate incidents that i will not hesitate to repeat if you cross me understand -- give me a sir yes sir
sir yes sir
so forget what you 've seen on sixty fucking minutes about the kinder gentler military -- you will either succeed quit or die by my hand
some of you may have heard there 's a hurricane coming
american soldiers do not wait for good weather -- they do not wait for a bright sunshiney day to do their duty
an american soldier learns to operate in the worst conditions and turn said conditions into an advantage against their enemy
anyone who thinks these conditions are too harsh feel free to lay down and die you get me
sir yes sir
lz is two clicks north of a cabin you are to split into teams of two and work your way through your designated area blasting as many targets as you can find
each area has twenty targets first team to take all twenty and find the cabin wins
teams are as follows -- dunbar and nunez pike and mueller kendall and childs
great great
that 's fantastic
it was on that night karl met his destiny
and i met mine
almost
hey kid
your friend just made himself a star
that 's great
see
the big guy likes it
i just saw the woman i 'm going to marry i know it
but then i lost her
tough break
most men have to get married before they lose their wives
i 'm going to spend the rest of my life looking for her
that or die alone
jesus kid
let me guess
real pretty blonde hair blue hat
yes
i know her uncle
friends of the family
who is she
where does she live
kid
do n't waste your time
she 's out of your league
what do you mean
you do n't even know me
sure i do
you were hot shit back in hickville but here in the real world you got squat
you do n't have a plan
you do n't have a job
you do n't have anything but the clothes on your back
i 've got a whole backpack full of clothes
someone stole my backpack
kid you were a big fish in a small pond
this here is the ocean and you 're drowning
take my advice and go back to puddleville
you 'll be happy there
i was wrong about you kid
you may not have much but what you got you got a lot of
you could get any girl
there 's only one i want
her name is sandra templeton
she 's going to auburn
the semester 's almost over so you better hurry
thank you
good luck kid
welcome to ya
what 's your name
edward bloom
bloom like a flower
yes
oh
here
right here
edward bloom
we were n't expecting you yet
you were expecting me
not yet
what is this place
the town of spectre
best kept secret in alabama
says here you 're from ashton right
last person we had from ashton was norther winslow
the poet
what ever happened to him
he 's still here
let me buy you a drink
i 'll tell you all about it
hell i 'll have him tell you
no
i 've got ta meet somebody
i 'm already running late
now tell me if that is n't the best pie you ever ate
it truly is
i have to leave
tonight
why
this town is everything a man could ask for
and if i were to end up here i 'd consider myself lucky
but the fact is i 'm not ready to end up anywhere
no one 's ever left
you get the eye
i brought it
let 's see it
bloom
don
what the hell are you doing
this is my girl
mine
i did n't know she belonged to anybody
will
dr. bennett
it 's good to see you
my wife josephine
a pleasure
can i see him
absolutely
be good for you to talk to him
glad to see you 're not trying to have a heartfelt talk
it 's one of my greatest annoyances when people talk to those who ca n't hear them
my father and i have an advantage
we never talk
how long have you known my father
thirty years
maybe more
how would you describe him
five eleven
one eighty
regulated hypertension
how would his son describe him
did your father ever tell you about the day you were born
a thousand times
he caught an uncatchable fish
not that one
the real story
did he ever tell you that
no
your mother came in about three in the afternoon
her neighbor drove her on account of your father was on business in wichita
you were born a week early but there were no complications
it was a perfect delivery
now your father was sorry to miss it but it was n't the custom for the men to be in the room for deliveries then so i ca n't see as it would have been much different had he been there
and that 's the real story of how you were born
did you see that woman
what did she look like
well she
uh
was she nekkid
how are you gon na make it without your shoes
i suspect it will hurt a lot
promise me you 'll come back
i promise
someday
when i 'm really supposed to
you must be edward bloom
how did you know
no one would come out here unless they had business
and no one would have business with me except for you
you 're buying the town
apparently i 've overlooked this one piece of it and i 'd like to remedy that
you see in order for the town to be preserved the trust must own it in its entirety
so i 've heard
i 'll offer you more than it 's worth
and you know you wo n't have to move
nothing will change except the name on the deed you have my word
in so many words yes
then i do n't think so mr. bloom
if nothing is going to change i 'd just as soon it not change in the way it has n't been changing all this time
it 's not like you 're going to lose anything
you can ask anyone in town
i 've been nothing if not generous
i want the best for everyone
helping people makes me happy
i 'm not convinced you should be happy
i 'm sorry
have i offended you
you 're beamen 's daughter
your last name is different
you married
i was 18
he was 28
turns out that was a big difference
i wo n't be selling you this house mr. bloom
i see
i thank you for your time
do n't
do n't be embarrassed
i should never have let you think that
i am in love with my wife
i know
and from the moment i saw her until the moment i die she 's the only one
lucky girl
i 'm sorry jenny
i am
really
you 're lucky to get four words out of them in english
but if you were to walk through the jungle you 'd hear them speaking the most elaborate french
those parrots talk about everything politics movies fashion -- everything but religion
hi
how are you feeling
i was dreaming
what were you dreaming about
means when you dream about something that 's going to happen
like one night i had a dream where this crow came and told me your aunt is going to die
i was so scared i woke up my parents
they told me it was just a dream to go back to bed
but the next morning my aunt stacy was dead
that 's terrible
terrible for her but think about me young boy with that kind of power
was n't three weeks later that the crow came back to me in a dream and said your grampa is going to die
well i ran right back to my parents
my father said no gramps is fine but i could see there was trepidation
and true enough that next morning my grampa was dead
because see my mother was banging the milkman
no i understand
he was slipping her a little extra cream
he was buttering her rolls
pumping her churn
splashing milk in her box
stop
they were squeezing the cheese
clanking the bottles
licking the popsicle
spooning the sherbet
can i take your picture
you do n't need a picture
just look up handsome in the dictionary
please
that 's because we did n't have a wedding
your mother in law was never supposed to marry me
she was engaged to somebody else
i never knew
will never told you that
probably just as well
he would have told it all wrong anyway
all the facts and none of the flavor
oh so this is a tall tale
well it 's not a short one
there was one time when i was eleven
you were talking about your wedding
i did n't forget
i was just working on a tangent
see most men they 'll tell a story straight through and it wo n't be complicated but it wo n't be interesting either
i like your stories
and i like you
hardly two stories in the whole place
now i 've heard in real cities they 've got buildings so tall you ca n't even see the tops of 'em
really
would n't lie to you
and they 've got all you can eat buffets
you can eat a lot ca n't you
i can
so why are you wasting your time in a small town
you 're a big man
you should be in the big city
you 're just trying to get me to leave are n't you
that 's why they sent you here
what 's your name giant
karl
mine 's edward
and truthfully i do want you to leave karl
but i want to leave with you
you think this town is too small for you well it 's too small for a man of my ambition
i ca n't see staying here a day longer
you do n't like it
i love every square inch of it
but i can feel the edges closing in on me
a man 's life can only grow to a certain size in a place like this
so what do you say
join me
okay
okay
what did she say
beats me
you know anyone 's who 's taken it
that poet norther winslow did
he was going to paris france
he must have liked it because no one ever heard from him again
tell you what
you take the other way and i 'll cut through here
meet you on the far side
you 're not trying to run away
just to be sure you can take my pack
you can see my predicament
my wedding ring the symbol of fidelity to my wife soon to be the mother of my child was now lost in the gut of an uncatchable fish
make him stop
you -- -- are in for a surprise
am i
having a kid changes everything
i mean there 's the diapers and the burping and the midnight feedings
did you do any of that
no but i hear it 's terrible
then you spend years trying to corrupt and mislead this child fill its head with nonsense and still it turns out perfectly fine
you think i 'm up for it
you learned from the best
people need n't worry so much
it 's not my time yet
this is n't how i go
really
truly
i saw it in the eye
the old lady by the swamp
she was a witch
no she was old and probably senile
maybe schizophrenic
i saw my death in that eye
and this is not how it happens
so how does it happen
surprise ending
would n't want to ruin it for you
there was this panhandler who used to stop me every morning when i came out of this coffee shop near the office
okay
and every day i gave him a quarter
every day
then i got sick and was out for a couple of weeks
and when i went back there you know what he said
what did he say
you owe me three fifty
really
true story
when did you ever work in an office
there 's a lot you do n't know about me
you 're right
dad i 'm hoping we can talk about some things while i 'm here
you mean while i 'm here
i 'd just like to know the true versions of things
events
stories
you
your mother has n't been keeping up the pool
if you wanted to you could
i will
you know where the chemicals are
i used to do it when you were gone remember
i used to do it a lot
i thought you were n't dying
i said this is n't how i go
the last part is much more unusual
trust me on that
why not religion dad
it 's rude to talk about religion
you never know who you 're going to offend
the maple tree and the buick
we heard it
i think someone has n't
but the real story is how i got the car
you see
dad
son
can we talk
do you know much about icebergs dad
do i
i saw an iceberg once
they were hauling it down to texas for drinking water only they did n't count on an elephant being frozen inside
the woolly kind
a mammoth
dad
what
i 'm trying to make a metaphor here
then you should n't have started with a question
because people want to answer questions
you should have started with the thing about icebergs is
the thing about icebergs is you only see 10 percent of them
the other 90 percent is below the water where you ca n't see it
and that 's what it is with you dad
i 'm only seeing this little bit that sticks above the water
what you 're seeing down to my nose
my chin
i have no idea who you are because you have never told me a single fact
i 've told you a thousand facts
that 's all i do will
i tell stories
you tell lies dad
you tell amusing lies
stories are what you tell a five year old at bedtime
they 're not elaborate mythologies you maintain when your son is ten and fifteen and twenty and thirty
and the thing is i believed you
i believed your stories so much longer than i should have
and then when i realized that everything you said was impossible -- everything
-- i felt like such a fool to have trusted you
you were like santa claus and the easter bunny combined
just as charming and just as fake
you think i 'm fake
only on the surface
but that 's all i 've ever seen
dad i 'm about to have a kid of my own here
it would kill me if he went through his whole life never understanding me
it would kill you huh
what do you want will
who do you want me to be
yourself
good bad everything
just show me who you are for once
i have been nothing but myself since the day i was born
and if you ca n't see that it 's your failing not mine
the river
the river
tell me how it happens
how what happens
how i go
i can try dad
if you help
just tell me how it starts
like this
okay
okay
it 's unbelievable
story of my life
you become what you always were
a very big fish
and that 's the way it happens
yes
exactly
i 'm sorry
do n't need to apologize to me
i mean i 'm the luckiest person you 're going to find today
oh
but you 're wrong
i do know you at least by reputation
edward bloom from ashton
see i 'm actually engaged to a boy from ashton
don price
he was a few years older than you
daffodils
they 're your favorite flower
how did you get so many
i called everywhere in five states and explained this was the only way i could get my wife to marry me
you do n't even know me
i have the rest of my life to find out
how can i convince you to stop
go out with me
i was drying out
i see
we need to get you one of those plant misters
we can spray you like a fern
this is why you do n't show work in progress
norther do you ever regret not making it to paris
i ca n't imagine any place better than here
you 're a poet
you oughta be able to
and maybe if you 'd seen more you could
it 's me
norther winslow
i was astonished to see the greatest poet of both ashton and spectre all the way out in texas
i do n't believe it
i want you to know when you left spectre it opened my eyes
there was a whole life out there that i was not living
so i travelled
i saw france and africa half of south america
every day a new adventure that 's my motto
that 's great norther
i 'm happy for you
i ca n't believe i helped
so what are you up to now
i 'm robbing this place
this is it
the whole vault
fraid so
edward it 's got your deposit slip on it
oh
oh
hello
i was n't expecting you
are you jenny hill
i am
and you 're will
i 've seen your picture that 's how i recognize you
i almost said something at the store but it would have been awkward
like this
how did you know my father
this was on his sales route so he was through here all the time
everyone in town knew him
look i do n't know how much you want to know about any of this
you have one image of your father and it would be wrong for me to go and change it
especially this late in the game
my father talked about a lot of things he never did and i 'm sure he did a lot of things he never talked about
i 'm just trying to reconcile the two
logically you could n't be the witch because she was old back when he was young
no it 's logical if you think like your father
see to him there 's only two women your mother and everyone else
you did n't become crazy
well therapy
and one day i realized i was in love with a man who could never love me back
i was living in a fairy tale
thank you
i 'll bet you need to --
yes
down the hall on the right
the door sticks
you have to really pull it
i spent a week in morocco for the story
it was incredible
we 'll have to pick up a copy
i 'm going to get started on dishes
i 'll help you
i 'm going to check on him
i need to lie down for a bit
i 'm sorry
it seems every hour i have to
i know
it was the same when i was carrying will
like clockwork
do you like it being pregnant
i do
i loved it
it sounds peculiar but i loved every minute of it
i did
eddie was travelling a lot so he was gone but i felt like i always had a piece of him with me
a little part of his soul inside me
i could feel it
it was alive and kicking
i talked with your father last night
did you
you never told me how your parents met
they met at auburn
what about the details
how they fell in love
the circus
the war
you never told me any of that
that 's because most of it never happened
but it 's romantic
mmm
mmm what
mmm what
i know better than to argue romance with a french woman
do you love your father
everyone loves my father
he 's a very likeable guy
do you love him
you have to understand
when i was growing up he was gone more than he was here
and i started thinking -- maybe he has a second life somewhere else
with another house another family
he leaves us he goes to them
or maybe there is no family
maybe he never wanted a family
but whatever it is maybe he likes that second life better
and the reason he tells all those stories is because he ca n't stand this boring place
but it 's not true
what is true
i 've never heard my father say a single true thing
look i know why you like him
i know why everyone likes him
but i need you to tell me i 'm not crazy
you 're not
i need you on my side
i am always on your side
and i think you should talk to him
what happened
your father had a stroke
he 's upstairs with your mom and dr. bennett
is he going to be okay
how did you get here
we swam
the atlantic it 's not that big really
ruth mchibbon offered to pick you up at the airport
we rented a car
you did n't need to do that
you just did n't
i do n't know if you 've seen it but josephine has some photos in the most recent newsweek
really
that 's wonderful
mom would you say you understand dad
of course
what i mean is do you really know what 's going on in his head
yes
how is that possible
i mean you try to ask him a question and suddenly it 's another one of his stories
you ca n't honestly say you know him
yes will i do
and do n't presume things you do n't know
would you say you understand josephine
yes
but that 's a different
no it 's not
it 's exactly the same
your father and i met we dated and we married -- we chose each other -- because we understood each other on some fundamental level
just the same as you two
josephine and i have a lot in common
yes you both think william bloom is a very smart man
the problem is you only see me as your mother and not as someone 's wife
and i 've been his wife longer than i 've been your mother
you ca n't discount that
true
but i 've known him my whole life and i do n't feel like i know him at all
or ever will
i know it 's not easy
just remember he did n't choose to be your father and you did n't choose to be his son
you just ended up together
you could pick numbers out of a dark bag and it 'd be just the same
if you ask me it 's a wonder parents and children can stand each other at all
but i understand you mom
i always have
well clearly you do n't
but i 'm not the mystery you 're trying to solve right now
before i forget your father has papers in the basement i 'd like you to go through
i would n't know what 's important
mom do you know who that is
blonde hair
was she one of your teachers
no
but it 's weird
she seemed to recognize me
do you know who that is
that really happened
not everything your father says is a complete fabrication
did you and dad have any other property
i suppose your grandmother 's house when she passed on
but we sold that right away
your cousin shirley bought it
so you never bought any land
heavens no
we had a hard enough time keeping the mortgage on this place
i do n't suppose one of us could stay with him
in case he
in case he wakes up one of us should be there
i 'll stay
why do n't you go home with josephine and i 'll stay tonight
that 's okay
mom do you want some time with dad
yes
thank you
you first
fifty thousand
almost exactly
put it in the cases
split it up
and do n't forget you owe me 150
what for
you know what for
no i do n't
i got you those trousers from paul smith
i 've been buying you stuff all week
i 've been buying him stuff all week
such as
when we went to the hard rock cafe
who paid
when we went to see cats
who paid
those are n't presents
that 's normal friendship stuff
i paid for those guitar cases
yeah it was okay
yeah
it was quite good actually
some bits i really liked
the sets were good
the sets were excellent
everything was big you know all the rubbish coke cans sweet wrappers dustbins so when you were watching it you felt cat size
it was really clever
sixty four thousand eight hundred
there 's over eighty thousand here
do you like it
yeah
say thank you
thank you
what
you heard what i said
i 'm pregnant
i 've been throwing up for weeks
a baby
what are we supposed to do with a baby
name it
what
what are you doing
what are you doing here
what
you 're what
you 're with this creep now
leave him
you have
you 've actually fallen for this prick
no i have n't
this is sensitive
your car
lovely car
does n't necessarily give the right impression
ch
to customers approaching the bank from the rear
right
you can see why it 's sensitive
uh
yes
hello
i thought you could give us the tour this morning
sort of be our indian guide
right
what did he say
he says he feels safe here
i need to know who you are first please
oh
we are russian
yes
i know
good
and
and what
you mean from the beginning
jesus
can i uh okay as we say in russia can i cut a long story short
okay
nadia is my little cousin
except she 's not
but we say cousin
this is for you
hold on
toast first then we talk seriously i can see you are serious about us
so hang on
you 're both nadia 's cousins
of course not
alexei he 's is my problem
right
we better watch him
he 's crazy
right
i am actor he is actor although he is an actor stroke musician
i just noodle along i 'm not so good
he makes me look like a retard -- he smokes me
i do n't mean he smokes me
no
right
so i can say he smokes me
so
so
so i come to england with other actors to make shows i meet this freak from novgorod i tell him of you and chicken and the birthday here we are
what was that
i asked her if you were happy to see us
i find it hard to tell with you
yes it 's okay
thank you for the food
so how long will you be in england
plans are for the architects politicians and so forth
you must have a visa or something
you 're asking for my documents
no no
when
i saw you waiting there by the gate
i
i have these uh
she explains to you
when i was a little girl my father had these beautiful old glasses
like
i do n't know the word
like for watching uh
for watching the birds
binoculars
binoculars
he had these binoculars he has kept from the war
what was that
oh nothing
tell me
no
it is too judgmental
tell me what he said
he says why did you send to russia for a wife
you are not ashamed of it
it 's no surprise to want to love
no
it 's not that
do you believe in love
i suppose it 's
i mean define your terms
it 's very strange
how many people are truly themselves with their love
it is the greatest human disaster and it is never in the newspapers
there are no marches against heartache no ministries against loneliness no concerts against disappointment
we look away
and still we know in secret that nothing is more important to us
the one thing we all share but do n't say
look john i will show you something
how is bank
fine
i thought you were leaving today
to be indoors on such a day
it 's crime
i understand
i 'm so sorry
you can stay tonight
i have brought you trouble
maybe i should have come alone
good night
put the fucking kettle down
john
put the fucking kettle down
tell yuri tell him put it down or i 'm going to make him
he says you scare him so much he must go to the toilet in his trousers
john he is a soldier
a trained killer
we must do what he says
what
what does he want
oh jesus
he is sure you can do this
of course you can not
oh jesus
of course i ca n't
just leave her alone
i 'm so sorry
leave her alone
is that everything
yes
right
okay
good
it 's about forty miles from here
i do n't know if you 've looked at a map it 's close to london but it 's a city in itself
a roman city
it 's a nice house
i 'm having a problem with ants
i uh
it 's the warmer weather
i ca n't seem to find the nest
sorry do you understand ants
yes
i just ca n't find a nest
the root of the problem
i 've looked everywhere
what 's the russian for ant
sorry that 's a stupid
sorry
this is strange is n't it
yes
i 'm pretty nervous
are you
yes
i mean
ants
i 've got a problem with ants
so
is it different to how you imagined it
yes
i bet
what about me
am i how you imagined
yes
and how was the flight
sorry am i speaking too fast for you
yes
do uh
sorry
can you follow me
do you understand what i 'm saying
yes
good
or should i speak slower
yes
do you follow or should i speak slower
yes
uh
are you a giraffe
yes
syevodnya
syevodnya
happy birthday
happy birthday
frenzy
yes i know
they go
john
they go
what 's wrong
they go
of course
they go
yes
yes
they go
oh i do n't know
in my job as deputy assistant of new business at the bank would have to listen to the problems of a great many individuals
this took a lot of understanding and sympathy to try to work out solutions to their problems
but you see i 'm not in that line of work anymore
nowadays i 'm a bank robber
you do n't understand anything
i think that about covers it
i think i have grasped the part about you being dumped though
that 's got to hurt i imagine
that 's got to smart a bit
i mean strictly in my observer 's capacity it seemed you two were getting on pretty fucking famously
unless
unless this is part of the routine
you get tied up stick around distract me they both bust in and steal my cup of coffee
it 's makes it easier
okay
i do n't want to know
it makes it faster
if i do n't speak to the men they fall faster
it 's pretty obvious why
that 's a relief
it 's nice to know i 'm a regular guy
so what are you going to do
i 'm going to drink my coffee
then we 're going to the police station
where there will be lawyers loss of job house humiliation gutter press and probably prison
they do n't blame you
when a bank employee does this they understand
you get your life back
anyway i bet you hated that bank
even so i always felt the decision to burst in and rob it very much remained with me
why else would you send off for me
if you just wanted sex just go to a prostitute
well as it turns out i did
you must think
i 'm the biggest pillock
in the world
no i do n't
in the world
i know you just want to punish me --
i do
i want to very badly
so you 're just going to be vindictive
in every sense
if at all possible
you ca n't hurt me more than i 'm hurt already
well nadia it it 's all the same to you i 'd like to give it a bash
where 's the restroom
what
i 'm going to be sick
where 's the
what
no you 're not
i 'm going
i am
i 'm going to be sick
no you 're not
how
nice one
how dumb do you think i am
what
i said i do n't have any
so uh alexei which i know is n't his name
i do n't want to talk about him
fine
it 's none of your business
fine
absolutely
must be disappointing though
must come as a hell of a shock
so uh
look if you want to know is he better in bed than you then yes he is
oh jesus
if what you want to know is does he have a bigger cock than you then yes he does
of course
of course
of course he does
of course
thank you
thanks
but you know so what
not the kids type then is he
not that broody
you must be pretty miffed
he will come back
excuse me
he left me my passport and ticket
it 's pretty clear he wants to see me again
yeah
i tend to tie up and abandon women i really want to see again too
no
but you tend to tie them up
i do n't want to talk about it
why not
shut up
i 'm not listening
you do n't want to talk about it
no
okay we wo n't talk about it
we 'll pretend it never happened
so
what 's it like having to fuck men you hate
i do n't hate you
okay
let 's
okay
okay
you have had sex with people you do n't like have n't you
for money
to make money
and
what are you saying
and
it 's wrong
and who says what is wrong
and that would be morals
that would be one 's own moral sense of decency
what 's a moral orgasm john
tell me how it feels exactly
so
what then
you just detach sex from everything
whereas wet n wild is an emotional journey
tied and tethered
it 's pretty moving huh
like anna karenina
listen
i did n't go rooting around in your private stuff
so what
do you just switch off in your head or do you imagine you 're with him or what
sometimes
sometimes which
sometimes neither
some
what does that mean
there 's nothing wrong in liking sex john
i do n't like sex
i do n't think i 'll be having sex ever again
why
well it 's just that the thought trying to charm up an erection in front of a woman or alone for that matter makes me want to die
so now you hate all women
i think it 's my safest bet do n't you
oh
i think you will recover okay
i think you got what you paid for
what
you
i got what i paid for
you did n't mind too much
you know in russia there 's no work for women
it 's a different world
you do n't have to say anything
what
i
i was n't saying
please there 's no
oh
i was n't saying anything
then okay
so how old were you when you met him
fifteen
you do n't know him
he was very kind and strong
yeah
he 's a smashing bloke
the rest of the world john it 's not all like st. albans
thank christ for that
you are pretty naive if you think it is
i 'm pretty naive
look at you
you have to do all this and what have you got to show for it
nothing
i do n't have nothing
well what have you got
do you know if it 's a boy or a girl
no
have you had any before
no
are you scared
not really
maybe a little
what happened between you and the blonde
what
the thin
the girl with small eyes
the one in your cupboard
it 's none of your business
she did n't have small eyes
did she leave you
come on
it 's nothing to be ashamed of
who did she leave you for
your best friend
her boss
a woman
did she leave you for a woman john
she 's dead
i 'm sorry
i do n't know why i said that
she 's not dead at all
what
i do n't know why i said it
i 'm sorry
she 's alive
she 's alive
she is not dead
laugh it up
you should stop smoking
you 're pregnant
you smoke like a fucking lab dog
i 'm trying to quit
i 've got news for you
it 's not working
i smoke more these days
i smoke more when i 'm unhappy
nobody 's that unhappy
maybe i want to die
do n't you want me to die
i do n't want anyone to die
except for small eyes
except for small eyes
i 've got an hour
can i buy you a coffee
no
i think i better just go
okay
thank you
whatever
yeah
no thanks
please
why not
because it was a lie
okay
goodbye
goodbye
something else
okay
promise
you can probably buy them on the flight
i 'm quitting
this will be my last one
so
goodbye
goodbye
you did n't deserve me john buckingham
whatever
i 'm sorry
please
it 's not mine
it 's not mine either
it 's what you came back for
why
i 'm not asking you to marry me
no
what
no
i know
it 's more like a date
it 's a long way to go for a date
tell me about it
what does it mean
maybe you will find out
is the flight full
i 'm sorry sir
i believe the flight is closed
please check
is it full
please could you check
you have excellent english
thanks
how do you want to pay
cash
what are you doing
just wanted to see
you know the rules
you do know the rules do n't you
yeah i know
then start taking them seriously
yes ma'am
lazarus
oh
gave me a start
i 'm sorry
it 's these soft shoes i wear for my back
you hurt it
i 'm standing most of my day
they 're for support
did n't see you in church this mornin
been on the crop
may need to get some extra hands if i do n't want to work on sundays
well
it 's good to see you
angela
yes
i need to uh
go on laz
you can talk to me
my little niece
she got this deep cough
you take her to a doctor
no
no she ca n't go
mean to say
they 's just no money fo'a doctor
her daddy left for a job and uh
give her to me to look on
i just
i do n't know what to do
is your niece older than 12
oh she older than that
my sister got a bad cough with her pneumonia
i just copied her prescription
you do n't need to pay anything
just take it
but if she gets worse you give me a call
i wrote my number on the box
this gon na get you in trouble
not if no one finds out
thank you
oh
my wife
she had a card here for her migraine pills
she ai n't gon na be around no more
so if you
i already tossed that out
somethin' you should'a done to that woman long ago
how she treated you
of course that 's none of my business
do n't make it less true
i bet you have loyal customers
you liked what i brung ya
been eatin like a princess all week
even got enough for us to take a picnic under the gazebo
that 'd be nice
i put on the lotion you got me
can you smell it
i 's thinkin about singing in the choir
at church
mm hm
i do n't know if i got a good voice or not but
practice is only on mondays and wednesdays so
you gon na sing me somethin'
when
now
oh
no
come on just a little somethin'
right here
go'on now do n't be shy
hey
hey
you was n't at'cha work but that nosey gal up at the counter give me your home address
hope you do n't mind me comin over
what do you need
i need ya help again
more cough syrup
can i come in
i lied to you
it was wrong
but at the time
i did n't know what to do
imagine you got an earful from folks about that gal i 's carryin
laz
you do n't need to explain yourself to me
yes i do
cuz i feel for you
mean to say
i got feelings for you
and i did n't want you to think
i did n't
i do n't want you to go away
there 's better ways to say what i 'm trying to say but
they it is
do n't go away
laz
i 'm gon na put my trust in you
i 'm gon na do it knowin all too well i can get hurt like this
and i have been hurt
just like you
woman like me i got a lot of livin to do
but my days are precious to me
they all i got left
do n't want no more fuss
i want love in my life
you understanding me laz
i do
god 's truth
i do
he black alright he just ai n't blue
why you stop havin' dancin on saturday
used to have bands
all kind 's live shit
like a wake up in here now
folks can dance when they want
did n't buy that mirror ball for nothin'
you seen my snake skin shoes
naw
they got some blue dye though
you think them boots you got on come from a black cow
wanna get on somebody 'bout live music get on ol' laz there
he the one got this place shakin back in the day
do n't got ta tell me
me and my girlfriends use ta talk 'bout them hard fingertips he got pickin that guitar
mind i ask what 's all this business here
these are whipped body creams
it 's like a lotion
for your hands
some women prefer not to scent their bodies with perfume
so now they have scented creams
they help moisturize a woman 's skin
this one 's my favorite
it 's called ginger souffle
i recommend
applying the cream while the skin is still damp
so
perhaps just after a shower
i 'll take a jar of that too
still need a lift
yeah
transmission 's shot
look it
i got somethin' for us
this is gon na help okay
you gon na miss your bus
holy shit
yeah
sit down man
need a beer
sure
marv let 's get ronnie set up here
what happened
they been keepin a folder on me cuz of my stomach
like how it was just before we 'd play ball back in school
thought it was just some tic i got or ulcers like my daddy had
i ca n't
shoot
target practice i 'm a pro
i tag between the numbers each time but
but when there 's really loud noises around me
somethin' happens
i get shaky and
i lose my breath
they called it anxiety
severe anxiety
it can be fixed and all
just not in time for
it 's a long process but
they sent me home
i guess it could be worse
you could be comin back in a body bag
i ca n't get rae on the phone
she 's not at home
none of her friends seen her anywhere
she 's around
always is
i do n't know
she 's gettin crazy like she gets
begged me not to go
got real down
i just think somethin 's happened
like she run off with someone
you 'd tell me if you knew somethin' right
you been home yet
uh uh
i 's hitchin up the interstate when i seen your truck outside
you need a ride
this do n't feel right
kitchen looks just like i left it
i know cuz i cleaned it
she ever tell you she was thinkin of taking off
i just been so mixed up lately gill
and you know with her history i can see how she could get scared
and run
ronnie
you ca n't see cuz you 're too close to it
these nervous spells you get
you never had that shit back in school
that 's not right really cuz i
you joined up in that monkey troop cuz you had a plan for yourself
army'd pay for school
you were gon na get a degree maybe somethin' in business or agriculture and you were gon na make somethin' of yourself
you gon na steal my truck
make yourself at home
you done it already
it 's not like i ca n't go out and have fun with my friends
you think i 'm ronnie 's spy or somethin'
come tomorrow that dumb- ass gon na be halfway round the world tryin to keep his head on his shoulders
you think he 's gon na be thinkin about you
you go to hell
jes
jesse
oh shit
wait
wait
stop
stop what
thought you had a skirt earlier
i got others
this thing you got
i 've heard people say you 'd fuck a tree if it was handy
i can see that
but that nigger tehronne
thinks he 's some player cuz he hustles dope and stolen hubcaps
i mean i can see a tree
but that piece of shit
i begged him
do n't see why he had to go
i bet you did
just had to get that black cock up in you
i swear to god
what ronnie sees
you disgust me
the fuck you laughin at
you do n't got half what tehronne got
ronnie ship out this mornin
it 's so stupid
says to me that he do n't want nothin' to do with no military career
says he wants to move
open up an auto shop with his uncle up in knoxville
i said okay
how about now
let 's go
nothing 's gon na happen
not like everybody over there is in the line of fire with them arabs blowin themselves up
ca n't be thinkin bout him every second of my day
i 'll go outta my gourd
why should you waste your life waitin and wonderin
not like you 're married
i begged him not to go
and he did
ca n't remember the last time i saw you in that suit
your mother 's funeral
i 's a pallbearer remember
we leavin this weekend
deke got a friend in mobile gon na get him a job at the water company
if you come to talk about that muthafucka i 'm gon na get up and leave you sittin pretty in that new suit he bought'cha
think this about money still ya old fool
say what you got ta say but i ai n't gon na hear you speak his name to me
not never
you hear
how many times we been over this laz
how many times
thought we was gon na be friendly about this
carryin on behind my back
make me out to look like a fool to all our people
tell me what 's friendly about that
i 'm not ready to grow old laz
livin with you
i feel it
like i 'm one foot in the dirt
saw it happen to my momma
and that 's not gon na happen to me
i got living to do
and you gon na live it with him
rose
folks get sick
but you do what you can to get on the mend
our marriage
it just got sick
that 's all
talk to me about sick
ai n't been right since i moved into that drafty house
i keep the heat on
that damned rusty radiator bout burned the skin off my legs each time i passed
kept us warm for twelve years
i deserve better than this
better'n me
better than what you give
rose
please
laz
you ca n't say nothin'
if we get with a counselor
at the church maybe they 's
i do n't love ya no more
god forgive you for how you done me
let go
my daddy told me that a younger woman would bleed me dry
and that 's what you did
ya bled me
let go of my arm
would'a chopped my arm off if you asked
and this how you do me
laz i said let
you better pray gal
you better pray
do n't you lay a curse on me
you shut up
careful how you point that gun boy
or what
or what
boy
you here to make a point or you here to kill somebody
ai n't gon na be callin me boy when i blow your face off
you sayin you 'll do what
you heard me mother fucker
i 'll fuckin kill
boy
you so green you could n't stomp a baby duck
you testing me
huh
you testin me old man
test
shit
what kind'a test you thinkin
you mean like if you a man or not
if you a killer
only one way to prove that
you just look me in the eye boy and you squeeze that trigger back
like a man
yes
i mean that 's it
i wanna feel like a man with her
i wanna feel like the only man with her
teh
tehronne
tehronne
tehronne done this
nn nn
nn nn
no
n'ronnie
gal
you hearin my voice
mm mm
mm mm
come on gal
take it easy now
do n't rush it
how long
how long i been out
you been in and out goin' on two
maybe two days
two days
after your fever broke you 'd wake up in spells
long enough to get that medicine in ya
where 's ronnie
well i do n't
wait
he left
i do n't got any money
for fixin me up and all
do n't need none
then i better be on my way
do n't wanna put you out no more
think it 'd be best if you stayed put while we talk
naw'sir
i got ta be on my way
best try gettin ya wits about you fore you try to
let me say somethin' first
why you got me chained
way i see it it 's gon na take a while for you to get right
the fuck you been doin' to me
i ai n't laid a hand on ya but to ease yo fever
remember like i say i found you in the road
get this goddamn thing off me
i give ya enough chain so 's you can get about the house
get you to the kitchen
you need the bathroom it 'll reach
what do you want
we got everything we need
plenty of food
ya medicine still got a few good swallows in it
what do you want from me
whatever you gonna do to me just do it
and let me go
god saw to it to put you in my path
and i aim to cure ya of your wickedness
you some kind'a pervert
no ma'am
some crazy jesus freak gon na fuck the spirit into me
in my house you watch that lip
look it mister
you wanna have your way you take it
i 'll do whatever you want
but you got ta let me go
you ca n't do this
you ca n't keep me here
you sick
you got a sickness
we broke that fever
we gon na break that hold the devil got on ya
let me go
you can holla y'self hoarse
ai n't gon na bend my will
right or wrong you gon na mind me
gon na suffer you like jesus say to the faithless and the perverse generation
now you get up
and you get in my house
or what
stop it
stop it
it hurts
whose doin' is that
wicked little bitch
gon na cut me
you gon na get a lot more a'that you keep me locked up like this
no ma'am
you stop that foolishness
hm mm
hm mm
i said
stop
i can't
you like this
walkin me through this field like i 's your mule
ca n't sit all day on that sofa
need to get your legs strong
if i break one you gon na shoot me
the seed that land on good soil is for them who hear the word of god
and understand the word of god
not enough for you to hear what i 'm sayin you got ta understand
i know
i get it
what 's matthew doin'
gal
matthew ai n't doin' shit
this just a story
look it
i 've seen it in nature i 've seen it in men
ya got to change up your crop
cuz that seed ai n't gettin in
ya got ta cut this shit out
got no cause to be up under these fools ruttin on ya like you a bitch
like you somebody 's dog
no woman
who joins in union with almighty god
or man
in the sanctity of marriage
should degrade herself
and bend to another man 's will
my god gal do n't you got no sense
i ai n't sayin i ai n't weak
shit
playin guitar in the blood bucket jukes all ya life
a nigga learn how to sin let me tell you
i got sin in me
i ain't go'n lie
but i got respect
and all you got is bile gal
let go of me
givin up that switch like a tramp
behind my back and kill my baby
now that 's sharp
that is sharp
chain give you any trouble
uh uh
good
now i got the steaks on potatoes at a boil and biscuits ready to pop in the oven
r.l. and lincoln out yonder grillin up the corn
what do you know how to make
i do n't fuckin cook
gal i been around hard cursin folk all my life
and let me tell you
look it
i put the goddamn dress on did n't i
i think i 'm handlin myself with some
fuckin restraint here
how you got me locked up like a dog on a
if all you got is filth comin out'cha mouth
people just gon na tune ya out
rae
rae
i 'm not fightin with ya
i just know you got more in you than junk
now you sayin you do n't know how to cook anything at all
you know how to boil water
i can handle that
well get to it
they sure liked them devilled eggs
you drink whiskey
you take it straight
sure
want another
we drinkin buddies now
to freedom
still makin jokes
no joke
if you want
i can take you back to town now
i ai n't in a hurry
tell me what to do
the
chain helps
i seen a man die
he could n't breathe
his heart was
was givin out
you just havin' a fit
you ai n't goin' nowhere
he told me
get help
i just stood there and watched him
i watched him die laz
oh god
goddammit
oh laz
he hurt me
he
hurt me so many times
no one 's gon na hurt you no more
you think god forgives people like that
you think god forgives people like me
where you gon na be
right here
be here all afternoon
you ready for this
i 'm gon na just get some girl stuff like make up and
stuff
you took care of your wife like you do me
i tried
what is it
nothin'
get'chu at that table up yonder
by myself
you can handle it
are you drunk
keep drinkin water and you wo n't get a headache in the mornin
yeah gal i been here before
i guess you have
how you feelin today
you know how you feel when you come out of a bad hangover
like your eyes can open a little bit more
i know that
woke up real early
sun was shining
just thought i 'd mess around try to learn a song
go'on and sing it i 'll play
no you do it
i ca n't sing
stop that foolishness
just do as i say and close your eyes
close your eyes
and think about
well for a song like this i 'd say you think about what you love
what i love
get a good picture in your mind
now that 's sharp
that 's real sharp
miss ella mae set you up did n't she
you like it
i 've had nice things before but i always ruined 'em somehow
well this one 's yours now
you ready to take care of it
i do n't want you to let go
maybe i wo n't
do you call it a game when only one man win each time
i think you call it a damn shame
word wit'cha
in private
you need some weed
been years since i fooled with that
you know a white girl
dirty blond hair split down the middle like
that ai n't up to me to hook you up
naw what i mean
she her own you know
huh
i do n't pimp that
you talkin about who i think you talkin about you mean rae
rae doole
sexy little split tail like you say
i ca n't hook you up with that
i got two girls
one ai n't in town the other one pregnant
so
you on your own
this rae
you get with her
shit
who has n't
why you say that
she got a spare minute she 'll snatch up anyone
but me i 'm different
sometimes she need the real deal so she call me up
girl got an itch
you know
what 's a nigga to do
she like it rough
you like beatin on her
that ai n't my scene
if that 's somethin' you into
now hold up
see that girl is in my favor
you heard me nigga
you fuck with her rough and you got me to fuck wit
you collar that dog boy
i ai n't gon na hurt nobody
just wanted to know who she was
like i say you wanna hook that up
i ai n't in ya way
that switch of hers been all over this town
got that sickness you know
what'chu sayin
she a freak
got what you call a sexual addiction
what'chu sayin
what i 'm tellin you
girl got ta get dick or she go crazy
she a freak
got what you call a sexual addiction
what'chu sayin
what i 'm tellin you
girl got ta get dick or she go crazy
first hooked up with that bitch when she was 16
girl was fuckin the principal and two of her teachers
you know coach reynolds
uh huh
he tapped that
naw
go ask him
it got some miles on it but my boys say she run good
got fresh 22 's on her
ai n't my doin'
that 's just how it came to me
do n't worry
nobody gon na come lookin for it
i got the pinks
got no problem
ai n't gon na have my girl ridin no bus
do n't see generosity much these days
everything always got a catch
guess i 'm tryin to say
thank you
nobody ever asks me to do shit like this for people
and you know what
i 'm good at it
naw what i mean
you ai n't gon na make a fuss are you
nothing a man can do when a woman make up her mind
i never laid a hand on her in anger
not a day
not even when i 's drinkin
but this business got me wonderin what a good shake and slap would do for her
that kind of talk is between us
do n't you go in there with that shit on your tongue
i did n't start this r.l.
bojo called
said you got to see your brother at the long end of a broken bottle
you gon na preach 'bout turnin the other cheek
i think you did alright by god under the circumstances
your people are here for you laz
this is your home
no shame in showing your face
do n't know if god wanna see me
he knows where ya at
just answer the door if he come knockin
was that lincoln james i seen run off
he 's fine
just had a bad fall
why 's his britches round his knees
r.l. you gon na have to get on
i ca n't have nobody round my place
you get a call from rose
this ai n't got nothin' to do with that woman
just do n't want nobody around me now
somethin' wrong with ya phone
been callin the last few days
goin' dove huntin
you got ta go r.l
i ai n't foolin this time
you sayin that gun 's for me if i do n't
you ai n't gon na talk me outta shit no more
i got my mind made up and i ai n't gon na be moved on this
ai n't gon na be moved
got no place for preachin here
not now
so you do as i say
or what
i told you to turn back
are you outta ya goddamn mind
man like you ought not take the lord 's name like you just done
a naked woman chained in ya house
i 'm tellin you the truth dammit
i found her beat
left for dead
so i brung her home
laz i know about that girl
good number of this town 's sinners got my ear you know
oh laz
she 's had a mess of crabs and them std 's
what'chu thinking
i have n't laid a hand
on my life r.l. my wick is dry on this
you say she was beat on
you call the sheriff on that
put yo'self in my shoes
say you out here alone with a beaten half naked white woman loves to fuck
i been toe to toe with the law in this town for no more than being black and nearby
what 's that chain around her for
pass them potatoes lincoln
y'all let me know if these steaks are too dry
this all looks wonderful
mm
mm
now these eggs got some kick to it
what'chu got in this
ask the chef
got ta get that chain off her laz
somethin' like this gets out you could land in a heap of trouble
i 'm dealin with what god put before me
you believe he wants this
a woman chained to ya radiator
not like that
then what
she 's tied to me r.l
we tied to each other
the hell is this shit
what
i called bojo like you say
called up the fellas in the band
the fuck are all these people doin' here
been drinkin in this shit hole for years ai n't seen this many people since i do n't know
there you go preacher man
get me drunk so i do n't stick my foot up yo ass
i just know how you get
good to know them butterflies still in ya gut
heard about this morning
we ai n't here to talk about that shit
yeah you know you home old man
you just walked through the door
i do n't know but i been told them georgia women sweet jelly roll
and now these three remain faith hope and love
but the greatest of these is love
who gives this girl in marriage
i do
what happened in there
that wo n't your fault
ai n't a young man alive could keep they britches on with that girl being in heat like she is
why she got a chain on her
that 's between her and me
it 's private
and i do n't want you goin' off and tellin ya daddy
please do n't tell my daddy
my mouth is shut boy
and that 's how we gon na keep it
do n't go braggin to ya buddies ya heard me
so
that your first time
yes'sir
you struck some gold did n't ya
i skipped lunch
well dig in son
got plenty to eat
thank you
i got ta ask you
why do you think laz is keepin you chained like this
you know how like they say you save someone 's life you responsible for them
guess he just do n't think it 's safe for me
so he got it into his head that the only thing gon na keep you from endin up bleedin on the side of the road again without a stitch of clothing on is
you think he 's crazy for thinkin that
you a preacher
that 's right
can i ask you a question
people always say you got ta get good with jesus if you want not to go to hell
that you say sorry for all you done and
and jesus would let you go on to heaven
you could put it that way
but that 's so fuckin stupid
i 'm sorry
did n't mean to curse
what 's on your mind
you ca n't hurt people
and then just say i 'm sorry and then everything just gets washed away
why would heaven want people like that
people who
do what they want and then
switch
i 'm gon na tell you somethin' and it 's just gon na be between you and me
i think folks carry on about heaven too much
like it 's some all you can- eat buffet up in the clouds
and folks just gon na do as they 're told so they can eat what they want behind some pearly gates
i can go to shoney 's for that
it starts like this
fire
that spreads
starts in my head
then moves to my stomach
then it goes lower
i can stop it sometimes but mostly i just jump on and ride it out
then everything'll go back to normal you know
only thing ever took that feeling away was
was
when i met ronnie
cuz i love him so much
he 's all i got in my life that 's special
and i like taking care of him and helping him when he gets nervous
when i can do that for him
it 's like i 'm givin somethin' of myself that i have n't givin nobody else
rae look at ronnie
and tell him how you feel
this ai n't gon na work
rae
i do n't see why we got ta lie 'bout it when you and i know this ai n't gon na work
rae do n't do this now
it 's stupid
it 's so fucking stupid
rae
hey
hey
you do n't got ta get up but
i got ta go
well
that 's my vomit
i came in here to get sick
i thought i 'd make the toilet but
anyway i got sick
are you wasted
no
i just got a messed up stomach
holy shit
what
holy shit ronnie
you 're a fuckin rock star
i 'm a what
all them people shoutin your name like they were doing tonight
shit
that arm you got'll get'chu on a box of cereal
i feel better
do you
yeah i do
ai n't been a week and you already some nigger 's whore
gill told me
told me how you and he
you and everybody
ronnie
please baby
did ya have fun with her
sweet as a peach i bet
huh
huh
goddamn it i ask you a question you better answer it or i 'm gon na blast a hole in ya
ronnie
did n't know you was workin here now
i just like dressin up in these goddamn blue vests
your money ticket get shipped today
what happened to your face
got in a little accident
yeah
since you workin on the square now maybe we could get some coffee in the morning if you want
you need money again
no
that 's not why
why we always got ta do this
i mean you and me been at each other as far back as i can remember
was n't no love between us
and i 'm your daughter
i 'm the only family you got
you never needed nobody
always made that clear to me
yeah
i know i did
but
i 'm tryin to be dif'rent
i 'm tryin to
get some peace you know
i 'm workin here rae
can you see that
i just wanted some make up
all that shit 's on aisle 5
i just think you should'a kept him off me that 's all
the hell are you talkin about
now see
do n't do that
i 'll go along with all you say about me
but that
you ca n't pretend no more on that
cuz i was just a kid momma
i did n't know about any of that stuff he was doin' to me
and you let him do it
some big nobody in your life
and you let him do as he wanted
with the only somebody you had
mobile technology is the new fix for these niggaz i 'm tellin you
i 'm just lookin ahead
anyways ai n't no money in drugs no more with these rednecks popping cough pills like they 's skittles
hey that 's what you need girl
get you some cough medicine
what you sick
just a cough
sugar and a spoonful of jack'll do it
alright
how much you need ho
the hell you call me
eh if the bootie fits
i think she got to you pappy
you want a popsicle go to good humor
and do n't call me pappy
still you got ta wonder how she 'd look in handcuffs
... it 's not like you were slow or anything
i think you did just fine
i think you did great
thanks
hey hey where you goin'
home
wait up
you know the guy who did the weismuller through the window --
-- cavello
ronnie cavello
he works for frank abolofia
atlantic city
casinos
so why dive through the glass for a nickel and dime bust
what 's this
let go
back up
get rid of it
why
it 's not regulation
and the only way you 're gon na stop anybody with it is to show it to him and while he 's laughing you can shove it down his throat
i 'll get rid of it when you get rid of the egg beater
what are they doing now
eating scungilli just like the last time you asked
who do you think the jap is
maybe cavello 's buying a subaru
how would i know
i do n't blame you for being sore
it 'll pass when we bag him
charlie do n't do anything
promise me
what
frank abolofia
the wolf
some party
maybe we should do something
charlie take your gum stick it under your ass and keep it warm
what are you doing
saving your life
... nick you 're the one that 's always saying you never go anywhere
i was thinking the poconos charlie
maybe vegas
what are you missing
riding your motorcycle to the nurse 's house
that shit is sadder than ethiopia
beats forty hours on a plane
they say we got to turn around and come right back
that 's what they say
i got a plan
i call right
i say i got the dreaded thirty six hour asian shits from some raw clam and we stretch it into three days
you and i become a driving force on the local geisha scene
not a prayer
hey come on big guy like you cop from new york
you 're gon na be the biggest thing to hit town since godzilla
what 'd you say
where is the subway station please
i just want you to know
i mean anybody who says you ever took has got to deal with me
go to sleep charlie
you did n't take did you
you hear things
i worked the three nine in queens charlie
i did n't know
the lieutenant was on the pad along with the rest of the squad
i was new did n't know shit
when the feathers flew i got called in front of the special prosecutor
it 's on the top of my personnel file
they think i 'm dirty or i cut a deal
does n't leave you with a lot of friends either way
givin you a book is like givin a baby a gun
hey when in rome --
in rome i 'll bow
let 's go
nick we ca n't just --
i said let 's go charlie
... detective ich iro matsu moto
hey we 're getting mr. moto on our side
let 's grab some food
first decent idea you 've had
this should be it
you said that in the last two places
this the right place
i hope not
getting very weird
i 'd feel better if we had some heat
maybe we should bail
now that 's the kind of motorcycle i want to see you on
sure a rice burning crotch rocket
nick how we gon na bag this guy without any help
maybe i should work on that girl joyce she speaks the language
squid
pussy ass soft personnel
joyce can be nice
what 'd she say
that i should let you pay for the drinks
kampai
you cool ich
cool
you all right
you okay
what does ichiro mean anyway
what does charlie mean
hey all right
short shift
yeah
i came to save you
if you 're hopeless i 'll pull the plug
it 's getting too cold even for me nick
connie
all right how 's the new partner
high spirits desire commitment
you 'll take care of that
give me a break would you
if you give me one
are you expecting anyone
i was n't expecting you
goodness gracious great balls of fire
to the killer
jerry lee lewis
jerry lee lewis elvis dinky doo and the do n't 's
let 's book charlie
if he starts on motown we 'll be here all night
no this is the place for the young yakuza
that 's what you said in the last three piss pots
... we got to keep looking
track him down
great balls of fire
what 's the problem here
nick
give us a break
it 's ichiro
ich
leave the rice cake outside and go home
you know inspector you take shit once you take shit forever
i do n't deserve ohashi 's respect
why the hell not
i do n't that 's all
what happened
they made you leave your hotel
you caused a disturbance
it may be too soon to talk about it
when someone we care for dies we
keep something of their 's
a tie a pen
why were n't you at the platform
i could n't keep up
my shame is complete
you must leave
yeah
i 'll get him for you nick
i 've continued working on the case
i can see that
what 's he saying
he says they 're very nice
he wants to know if you have anymore
nick no one 's seen kobo in three days
he might not even be in tokyo
only one way to find out
get her up in the morning and put her to bed at night
you said you could keep up with her
no problem nick san
no
do n't say anything
do n't do anything and for christ 's sake do n't apologize
nick
what 'd i tell you
there she is
did i say that
you toler -- yes tolerate me
are we getting married
you 're doing fine ich
now drop it okay
sure
nick
if you 're gon na give me a hard time wait outside
work lunch groceries laundry
fabulous
four goddamn days
this is going nowhere
she disappeared
shit
you were too far behind
you ca n't come in
they do n't want --
gaiijin
i 'll check it out
if i smell one drop of scotch on your breath my friend --
you can trust me
i 'm not drunk
we 're through
i mean it
this is the end of the line matsumoto
nick --
shut up
... a godfather
his man was killed at the printing plant
i want to yank kobo
not without a small army nicklaus- san
ich my name is nick
not nicklaus not nicklaus san not nick san
nick
san is an honorable title
nick
a few minutes faster we might 've nailed him
where does this sugai live
a resort city beppu
i want to go talk to him
what
why
because he knows how to get to our man
he 'll never speak to a gaiijin
i 'll be a nice gaiijin
no
let 's go
him first
nick you ca n't do this
it 's done
you do n't have to come
grab the keys ich and get inside
no
not now man okay not now
work with me
start it
i ca n't
just one compadre
kampai
kampai
you did great ichiro
i called ohashi he 'll be waiting
i like him waiting
i was ready to have your ass for taking off on me
i followed them
an hour from the train station
how many men
i could n't tell
joyce
i do n't know
we need the plate to negotiate with
someone attacked him
now we 've got nothing to negotiate with
thank you
you have one
a wife
she left
i 'm sorry
me too
you all right
yes
call for help
louder pal louder
joyce give the assistant chief inspector a drink would you
think we 'll get him nick
we ca n't lose
how can you be so sure
do n't give him any more
he gets as much as he wants
ich said you left
there was a change in plans
dead gaiijin 's are big news
gaiijin
an outside person
a foreigner
a barbarian
you me
more you
i could use some help
show me around
i 'll pay you for your time
i do n't give tours
you can count on the truth from people who do n't like you
you have a helluva way of asking for help
you have a helluva way of answering
look you need ich
i 've been here five years and i still ca n't read all the street signs
maybe i 'm a quicker learner
i do n't think so
you know where i can get a decent cup of coffee this time of night
i 'm buying
somebody must be suffering somewhere you 're being so nice
i need your help joyce
where 's ich
unavailable
i 've heard of sugai
i 've also heard of the emperor
they 're both national treasures
one 's a hood
i need someone to translate for me
my japanese is n't that hot
besides you 'll never get in
it 's my last shot
i have to be on a plane home tomorrow night
and i 'm supposed to care
you could fake it
you 're wrong to sell ich short
he drinks
he 's got a reason
where 's the wife
you met her
i 'd invite you up but i know you 'd hate the incense
i chant
what do you chant
nam oyo ranged kyo
you think it 's dumb of course
not if it works
i 'll meet you at the train
i do n't remember saying yes
i do n't remember you saying no
they want your autograph
who am i supposed to be
this little guy thinks you 're robert redford
the other one thinks you 're charles bronson
tell them i 'm not
we 're in
the cheese
ca n't make you change your mind
last time you asked me to come along i nearly got a hole in my head
might be different in new york
maybe
if i come visit we can find out
i 'd like that
keep the change
i 'm taking you back
ugly
a couple of thousand years they 've been bound by these little rules
looking in
always afraid
ugly little lives
save it i already took the tour
you are a lucky man
where you come from a man can stand out
it 's expected
here a man is made to look a fool for standing out
i like your friend joyce
you 're lucky
guess i 'm on a roll
she 's such a long way home for you
time i 've got plenty of
this is my stop
i 'm amused
do n't be
sugai wo n't give it to me you know that
then take it from him
how big a package we talking about
this by this
dope
not in that company
the old man was a japanese paper manufacturer
hotel room and rental car were full of it
one guy do all the damage
yeah
thought you knew your way around dark alleys detective
it 's not your job
he was my partner
they 're blaming it on you
christ conklin you did n't even tell me you lost the prisoner
i planned on catching him captain
how
you do n't know the place
you do n't know the language
get on the plane
he killed a police officer
your plane 's at nine a.m. be on it
that 's orders
period
... remember counterfeiting is the feds
they 'll be all over abolofia 's place
stick tight
you i.d. the other plate he does real time
right
you lost a man we wanted for some time
it was very incompetent on your part officer
incompetent is letting people waltz through a secure area wearing your uniforms carrying official documents
i want a gun
it is not allowed
we 're police officers
you 're foreigners
work with me
i want your best detective
hey inspector i do n't intend to take the rap for this
do you know what this is
could you fill me in
why do n't you ask your chief detective
because i want you to tell me
the young are eating the old something that usually does n't happen here
can we skip the poetry inspector
what 's this
your visa has expired
be on a plane in twenty four hours or you will be deported
while you were hanging out at the visa office we found the son of a- bitch
look
seven years work by the finest engraver
mass produced sequentially numbered
the best there has ever been mr. conklin
i 'm impressed
but let 's use the short form
i 'm looking for --
-- kobo
i know
he killed two of my partners
one in new york one at the printing plant
i took kobo from the street
i gave him a home a future
but my ways were too slow for him
i served seven years in prison for my boss when i was a young man
kobo would n't serve seven minutes for his oyabun
he was supposed to take over this syndicate when i retired
i want him
he 'll be dealt with
our associates in new york were close to closing a deal with us
the families who control the casinos
yes
unlike our syndicates your criminals do n't understand the words honor and duty
we ca n't afford not to deal with them
imagine if your families could pay their gambling and drug debts with perfect counterfeit bought for cents on the dollar
the feds would be onto you in a month
not with these bills
and even if it only took them six months do you know what our profit margin would be
why tell me this
the other plate is currently in new york in the hands of kobo 's man
find it for me
you trust me
i 'll pay you
with these
swiss bank deposit
gold bullion
whatever you want
you know the city and the police
if i say no
you 're smarter than kobo
you know the price of deceit
think about it
i do n't have to
good
he 'll find out you took me
i 'm unprotected
he 'll kill us
all of us
you do n't stand a chance
that was n't our deal
you want him dead too
after a court convicts him
he belongs to me
he knows what he 's doing
if he wo n't cooperate
mr. sebastian is a host who wants to be appreciated
we 'll appreciate him and he 'll cooperate
i 'm sure glad you found us sebastian
what do you think mary
i do n't think there is another human being in this whole world who would have helped us
pris
let 's go while there is still time
where
anywhere
what 's the point
not to be trapped
you underestimate the trap mary
one man
he must be good
then go get him
that would n't be very sporting
the name is batty
roy batty
oh
yeah
it might be better if we talk in private sebastian
why do n't you go home
here 's your check my boy
thank you
i 'm surprised you did n't come to me sooner
it 's not an easy thing to meet your maker
and what can he do for you
can the maker repair what he makes
would you like to be modified
had in mind something a little more radical
what 's the problem
death
i 'm afraid that 's a little out of my
then a repressor protein that blocks the operating cells
would n't obstruct replication but it does give rise to an error in replication so that the newly formed dna strand carries a mutation and you 're got a virus again
but all this is academic -- you are made as good as we could make you
but not to last
put it this way
rolls royces are made to last -- as least they were
but i 'm afraid you 're a ferrari
a high strung racing car -- built to win not to last
also you 're too valuable to experiment with
i am
i 've done some questionable things
also extraordinary things
nothing the god of biomechanics would n't let you in heaven for
i like a man who stays put
an admirable thing to be able to sustain yourself in these times
you live here all by yourself do you
well no not really
there 's mr. deetchum he 's the watchman he lives on the first floor
how about breakfast i was just going to make some
if it would n't be too much of a bother
a little bite to eat would be
oh no bother i 'd be glad to
well actually
why are you staring at us
you 're just all so
so different
what sebastian
you 're androids
what generation are you
nexus 6
what about your friend the man who owns this building
dr. tyrell
he 's not really my friend
i just do a job for him now and then
tyrell could help us sebastian
he could
his company made us
i 'd be happy to mention it to him
be better if i could talk to him in person
but he 's not an easy man to get to
no
when do you deliver your project
this afternoon
you 're our best and only friend
thank you
where are you going sebastian
just thought i 'd
no you stay here with us
out last night together
what 's going on down there
he 's not ready yet
when
tomorrow he says
this is my uncle roy sebastian
hello glad to meet you
then we 're stupid and we 'll die
not if everybody is doing their job here at home
how are things at home
i think therefore i am
very good pris
now show him why
you got a machine on it yet
we 're using esper -- a 231 -- that picked up holden 's alarm
its guess is that all five are in the city
where do we start
the tyrell corporation has a demo model
check it out on the voight kampff
there 's a chance the nexus-6 is beyond out ability to detect
if that 's the case everybody 's up shit creek
what was the cover on the one that got holden
industrial refuse
garbage man
yeah
bryant here
regarding the rundown you requested on job applicants esper 's concluded that the only irregular category that tyrell 's got is the entertainment section
you better get on it
i was just about to have my dinner
if you hurry you 'll get back before it gets cold
i got a spinner on your roof in five minutes
good luck
she was gon na get away
then let her get away
i thought you were a pro -- you 're supposed to be a fuckin tracker
i did n't like her
you did n't like her
look go home
get some rest
take an aspirin
yeah
yeah
this is bryant
are you alone
yeah
she 's not with you
who
take a number
canapt 1700 tenth floor villa vita district olympia south
got it
okay here it is
eldon tyrell his family and half his staff were just massacred
the cat is about to get out of the bag
pressure is definitely on
the nexus program is terminated
when you finish there locate nexus designated rachael and retire
well when do you get paid
soon as i finish the job
when might that be
day after tomorrow
oh
day after tomorrow
machines can be helpful sometimes but they can also be a pain in the ass
ask for a trace on a forger and you might wind up at a steel- mill
i do n't mind a bum steer once in a while -- it 's their personalities that usually get me
somebody once said that man makes machines in his own image
if that 's true whoever made esper should have been shot
this is esper and i 'm ready
go ahead please
you equipped for random questions
why yes of course
you start
the five in question are third generation nexus sixes constructed of skin flesh culture selected enogenic transfer conversion capable of self perpetuating thought para physical abilities and developed for emigration program
are you with me
how do i stop one
unlike a five they can sustain massive traumas to several parts of the body without debilitating another
sever a leg and it will perform quicker on the remaining leg than the fastest man can run
okay but
i 'm coming to that
vulnerable zone is the base of the skull the occipital bone
a direct hit is a positive retirement
here 's something you might find interesting
they have been built to emulate the human in every way except in its emotional spectrum
however after a period of time it is only logical that such a mechanism would create its own emotional responses hate love fear anger envy
i know all that
what about a summary then
i think we 're through for the night
yes
do you have something against science
not if it works
and what in your estimation works
the umbrella
four years
which would make her termination date
never mind
do they have that knowledge
longevity is classified
no
okay gimme a run down on the three females
nexus designated mary incept november 1 2017 domestic conditioning non competitive trained for day care position
next
nexus designated pris incept data december 13 2017 competitive programmed to provide pleasure for long term spacers
number three
nexus designated zhora incept june 13th 2017 athletic conditioning highly competitive special abilities in the entertainment field
i think i have no money
it 's okay
forget it
but i would like to buy you drink
i 'll but you one
what 'll you have
vodka
shot of vodka please
thank you very much
my pleasure
those cockroaches
ya
how long you had these guys
two months
but this one is not guy
it is girl
his girl
prosit
prosit
you like to kiss her goodbye
no thanks
i like you
i like you too
one more eh
i got ta piss
how old am i
i do n't know
my birthday is april 10 2015
how long do i live
four years
i 'm great
i mean i know i 'm not really great but i feel just great
how you like my new suit
well you do n't have to worry about getting it wrinkled
love is just another name for sex
love is sexy and sex is lovely -- i do n't care what you call it an android ca n't have it
these are n't just
i know what they are deck -- look maybe they can pretend to feel but far as the raw hot emotions of the old heart -- no way
nerves of steel
no rust
i did n't say that
your motivity rate checked out a little slower than last time
meaning
meaning you do n't run as fast as you used to
during the road test
yeah
your mind kept wandering
that bothered me
huh huh
considering the nature of your work that could be unhealthy
true
but you have n't put in for emigration
nope
you 're going to be over the limit
listen i could make you a long list of complaints about this fucken city but i still rather be here than up there
what if you change your mind
they 'll change the limit before i change my mind
you sure
never been more sure of anything in my life
why did n't you go
too old
but if you could
my job is here
me too
taffey lewis
yes
can i come in
i 'd like you to take a look at these pictures
of course
book the good ones for where
lots of places
the tours the clubs the silicone shows private parties
what shows
silicone valley
lots of these science guys never leave that place
we book two shows a month in there
those big time techs and bio- guys might be real high zoners up here but when it comes to the arts they like it loud and lewd
yeah
i 'm with the american federation of variety artists
there 's been reports of management sexually abusing the artists in this place
i do n't know nothing about it
you have n't felt yourself to be exploited by the management in any way
how do you mean exploited
like to get this position
did you or were you asked to do anything lewd or unsavory or otherwise repulsive to your person
are you for real
oh yeah
you 'd be surprised what goes on around here
i 'd like to check the dressing room if i could
what the fuck for
for holes
it that mother real
of course he 's not real
you think i 'd be working here if i could afford a real snake
it 's a good job
you mean the snake
the best
does it eat
come on
jeezus
sorry
hey
do your job but do n't wreck mine huh
you 'd be surprised what a guy'll go through to get a glimpse of a beautiful body
i bet i would
little dirty holes the bastards drill in the wall so they can watch a lady undress
it 's artificial
of course not
are you apprehensive
why should i be
for the responsibility of your power
being a police bureaucrat you 've got more than your share
i would n't accept it
also i 'd report the person who gave it to me to the police
you have a little boy
he shows you his butterfly collection plus the killing jar
i 'd take him to the doctor
you 're watching t.v. and suddenly you notice a wasp crawling on your wrist
i 'd kill it
in a magazine you come across a full page photo of a nude girl
is this testing whether i 'm an android or a lesbian
you show the picture to your husband
he likes it and hangs it on the wall
the girl is lying on a bearskin rug
you become pregnant by a man who runs off with your best friend and you decide to get an abortion
i 'd never get an abortion
why not
that would be murder mr. deckard
in your opinion
it would be my child
sounds like you speaks from experience
last question
you 're watching an old movie
it shows a banquet in progress the guests are enjoying raw oysters
ugh
is there anything else
i know you think it complicates your work but i 'm here to help
i 've already got more help than i need
i think you need more help than you 've got
do i make you nervous
yeah
i 'm sorry
i can imagine
can you
i could n't
they probably want to find out when they were made
right
do n't just stand there looking at me
it 's not polite
what do you want me to do
sit
you ever take a bath with a man before
there 's a lot i have n't done with a man before
i told you i 'd come back
you did
you did n't hear me
you were sleeping
who is this
me and my dad
where is he
dead
oh
how come you 're not on the job
i am
part of my job is to sit on a couch and try and figure things out
how are you doing
not too good
did you cry when your father died
yeah
that 's another thing i ca n't do
nobody is freer than when he dreams
i read that
it was n't very good last night was it
i do n't know i have nothing to compare it to
i guess i thought there was something more to it
what
i do n't know
i think i missed something
like
i 'm not sure
is there a secret
when was the last time you cleaned this place
hmmm
have you ever cleaned your apartment
do n't be fooled by appearances
it appears to be dirty -- why do n't you get somebody
they could clean around the arrangement
i do n't like people snooping around my stuff
but if i do n't plug it in how can i
never mind the plug just go through the motions
but then how can you
i do n't like the noise
just practice
practice makes perfect
this feels stupid
good for a smart girl to feel stupid
part of your education
you 're sick deckard
i never felt better
have you ever known anybody a long time
you mean a woman
uh huh
what 's a long time
ten years
nope
nobody could stand me that long
you know what i think
what
that some of the folks around here are more programmed then me
where the hell you been
you know where i been
i been on vacation
next time you go on vacation do me a favor let us know where it is
what 's up
holden got hit
bad
severed spine
you 'd better get in here
bryant 's waiting for you
i 'll see you in a minute
thanks
black
please
is this to be an empathy test
yes
capillary dilation of the so called blush response
plus fluctuation of the pupil plus involuntary dilation of the iris
may i ask a personal question
go ahead
have you ever retired a human by mistake
no
but in your profession that is a risk
nothing is infallible but so far the voight kampff scale bas been foolproof
like you said mr. deckard a machine can be a hazard
the voight kampff scale is a machine is n't it
one that relies on human interpretation
where 's the subject
sitting next to you
well
if she is the machine works
the machine works
she is
how many questions did it take
thirteen
and how is it one man will be able to cover so much ground
discreetly
all pertinent information is being fed into your departmental computer an esper 231 -- i believe -- and a photo over lay packet is being produced
let 's keep our eyes on the road deckard
sorry
we 're going to have to start the sequence again if you do n't stay with me deckard
concentrate
how do you know i 'm not
you 're not responding to the stimulus
i can see right here i 'm not getting a reading
i 'm tired of this
almost through
i kinda get nervous when i take tests
do n't move
sorry
already had i.q. test this year -- but i do n't think i never had a
reaction time is a factor in this so please pay attention
answer quickly as you can
you 're in a desert walking along in the sand when all of a sudden you look down and see a
what one
what
what desert
does n't make any difference what desert -- it 's completely hypothetical
but how come i 'd be there
maybe you 're fed up maybe you want to be by yourself -- who knows
so you look down and see a tortoise
it 's crawling towards you
a tortoise
what 's that
know what a turtle is
of course
same thing
i never seen a turtle
but i understand what you mean
you reach down and flip the tortoise over on its back leon
what 's your name
pris
mine 's j.f. sebastian
hi
you want to go home
i do n't have one
oh
where are your folks
they left
what about friends
i have some but i have to find out where they are staying
we scared each other pretty good did n't we
we sure did
i 'm hungry j.f.
i 've got stuff
if you wanna go to my place
i was hoping you 'd say that
whatcha doin'
you scared me
you look
better
just better
beautiful
thanks
and you live in this building all by yourself
yeah i live here pretty much alone right now
ah you get hold of your friends
as a matter of fact i did
they 've got some work to do tonight but they 're gon na come tomorrow
good
sebastian does n't like to go out too much
i keep a lot of provisions right here
what makes you think so
you 're all so perfect
hi
yes
i was wondering if you might help me
i
i seem to have lost my congressional medal of honor somewhere around here
oh now that 's a great one
you like it
bravo
thank q
this is my new friend
i 'm adam webber
he 's really funny
we work on rodeo drive
but we 're both professional dancers
really
you 're kidding
no i 'm not
my mom taught me
your mom was a dancer
she is a dancer
and a lovely one
you would like her very much
shall we dance
sure
let 's go talk first adam
yes ma'am
the key to my hotel room
i want you to have my baseball cards
and please be sure to pay my bill
young man stop right there
how do you do
i do fine adam
how 'bout yourself
you doin' any good
but i do miss that green sport coat of yours
thank you very much
but cliff that 's my seat
and i was just--
how 'bout a drink at the bar
please excuse this interruption
oh brother
eve i do n't mean to be rude and please excuse me cliff but eve is n't cliff just a butt with hair
what
i 'm sorry and legs
legs butt and hair
well is n't he
and shallow as well
shallow
i 'm shallow
cliff i must warn you
i know how to defend myself
do ya
maybe we should n't fight at all
fighting is pretty immature
it certainly is
i agree with you completely
eve
i 'm leaving
come on heathcliff i 'll walk you to the corner
yes ma'am
but my name is adam
where are we going
we
i 'm going home
and judging by that coat i 'd say you have to get back to the barber college
no i 'm lost
you 're lost
say,
did you just lose your job because of me
forget it
i 'm sick of working for that dickhead
dickhead
a walking penis capable of intelligent speech
a dickhead
what 's wrong with you
i just had a mental picture of
here pick these up
i came on a bus
why does n't that surprise me
i do n't know
why does n't it
well i guess because i 'm a little psychic
i have this thing
oh that 's nice
let me guess something
this is your first visit to la la land
you 're staying somewhere over in hollywood because like an idiot you thought that would be an exciting place to stay
right so far
so far
yes i 'm right
right
i knew it
so anyhow you get on a bus and before you know it you 're out here in the san fernando valley without a clue
which brings us to here
correct again
again
where are you staying
the holiday inn
yes
yes
the holiday inn
that 's exactly right
see
i 'm psychic
not completely but pretty much
that was pretty good was n't it
it was amazing
yeah
thanks
anyhow let me predict a bus for you to get on
do you own a car
i 'm not taking you there sweetie
rule number one in north america no strangers in the car
if it will make you feel any better i do n't have a gun
you do n't
nope
well that changes everything
get the fuck away from me
i mean it
i 'm sorry
i said something wrong did n't i
please forgive me
get away from me
wait
please wait
i 'll make a deal with you
i 'll give you a rogers hornsby if you 'll take me to the hotel
rogers hornsby
he 's all yours
i was holding him back
so
mister andretti your first time on the freeway
it 's webber
adam webber
mind if i change the station
better traffic reports on am
wait
wait
what is it
it 's perry
perry
perry como
you had him
go back
go back
okay okay
take it easy
how 's that
oh i could die
over this
yeah
listen to this part
this is where it really takes off
you are one scary son of a gun
hey what are you doing
i know a short cut
gee zooie
you better slow down
i ca n't help it
perry como always does this to me
i just get so cranked
that was
wonderful
i 've never felt anything like that in my life
yeah same here
do n't forget your suitcase
right
i am so glad to see you
i thought i 'd never see you again
okay down boy
i ca n't take this for driving you home
i wish i could but i ca n't
so here take it back
i could have just left it for you at the desk but it 's very valuable
now take it
i ca n't it 's yours
take it
damn it
okay
why are you doing that
i have n't brushed yet
oh
okay
well so long
enjoy your visit
troy
is he your husband
or a boyfriend
no
thank q
oh stop that
god
listen i know you like me
i can tell
but you know what
a lot of guys like me
not me exactly
it 's more like the legs or the butt or the hair
or some combination of the above
i think it 's the eyes
the eyes
okay
an eye man
anyhow it never works out
okay
not that you even need to know that
you look like crap by the way
what have you been doing
watching television in color
hey no kidding
in color
cross my heart and hope to die
see ya
why does n't it never work out
what
why does it never work out
you and
men
why
who the hell knows
... okay
it never works out because i 'm into legs and butts and hair myself
that 's why
so i wind up with guys who are very good looking but even more shallow than i am if you can picture that
now if you 'll excuse me i have to go find another low paying demeaning job where some guy named jerry keeps telling me how lousy his marriage is
why not go to work for me
doing what
selling all my baseball cards
and helping me buy enough food and supplies to fill several large trucks
food and supplies
who for
like starving people
well they 're not starving yet but they need help
how long would you need me
two weeks
what 's the pay
what 's fair
i 've got to make at least a thousand a week
you got it
wait here while i change
sure
why not buy them milk or something-- instead of dr. pepper
they like dr. pepper
who are these people
my mom and dad
very funny smart ass
hey
pipe tobacco
i 'm going to need all of this
this is swell
wait
wait
what
well another day another dollar
stop staring at me
sorry
thank you
and um
i guess
i guess you and i uh
adam
do n't even think about it
okay
i 'm sorry
i know that sounds mean but believe me it would be meaner if i did n't say it
okay
okay
now let 's take the truck back and get something to eat
there 's something else i would like you to help me with
name it
well this is going to sound a little crazy
oh i 'm sure it will
then forget it
no no
i 'm sorry
what is it
this is for me
think of me as your genie
just ask
well
okay
i would like you to help me find a
wife
a wife
yes
what for
because i want to get married
why
i do n't want to be alone
you can be single and not alone
marriage bites
bites what
the big one
it does
sure
i did n't know that
everybody knows that
ask my divorced sisters
or ask my divorced mom and dad
they 're all divorced
everybody 's divorced
it did n't used to be that way
i would n't know
what kind of wife are you looking for
one who 's not a mutant
no dogs huh
okay
and if possible i 'd like to marry someone from pasadena
when do you need her by
two weeks
well i could probably get you laid in two weeks but to locate a non mutant wife from pasadena
that could take some time
that 's what i was afraid of
could we talk about that a little later
of course
thank you
get out
the engine is still running
now get out
yes ma'am
stop that ma'am crap
sorry
you almost got us killed
i told you i 've never driven before
never drive again
you said it would be easy
i was wrong
is this your house
yes
i like it
okay let 's see
i'm not promising anything
you okay
um hum
i 'm seeing
snow
lots of snow
way up north
are we getting hot
yes
you live in
alaska
the only way in or out of your place is by plane and
you 've definitely come down here for food and supplies and
to find a wife
wow
yeah right
that 's where you 'd go to find girls
nome
he 's gay by the way
good for you
where 's he gone
he 's gone to check your answers on his computer
he has a computer
sure
in the house
no
we keep it in the backyard
of course in the house
it 's in there
may i please be excused
uh
yeah
all right
so what are you seeing
the what
wazoo
try to listen
whataya think
surfer grunge hip- hop euro trash
the guy with the underpants
that 's boring
about clothing
yeah
whatever you two want
if you 've got the time i 've got the wazoo
what about holding your right arm up like that all the time
it 's fine
just give it a try
and for gosh sake eve take your foot off the chair
my goodness gracious
this place is something
look unimpressed
no
not crazy
do i look crazy
yes
quit showing off
we 're here on business
good bye
i thought i was here to meet women
not that one
i like her
and do n't be so obvious
what have you ordered
it 's a rob roy
a very popular drink i 'm told
what about her
no way
why
i think she 's very attractive
adam
she 's got bitch written all over her
you do know what bitch means do n't you
yes i have a dictionary
but i ca n't understand for the life of me why you would call her that
or why cliff would say that about you
because we 're bitches
look at her
look at the expression on her face
the walk the jewelry the fingernails
please
how 'bout this one
okay
i like that
yeah sweet
that 's a nice way of putting it
what do i say to miss sweet when i meet her
really
yes really
basically they want what they think they ca n't have
same with guys
that 's why everybody is walking around here sending off you ca n't have me signals
what
romeo and juliet
i cried at the end
did you
you wanted to see me
you 're not from alaska
where 'd you learn to dance like that
and there are no starving people are there
why are you suddenly so mad at me
do n't change the subject
i want you to tell me the truth about yourself
i 've never lied to you
i 've maybe let you believe things that you wanted to believe but i 've never lied
you think i 'm some sort of sap
do n't you
no
i admire you
i
i fell in love with you the first time i saw you
i did
i think that you are the most--
i want to know exactly who you are and what you 're really up to
all right
let me tell you the whole thing
in 1962
adam
i 'm sorry
i do n't blame you
eve i 'm sorry
i 'm leaving too
but eve i would--
and tomorrow maybe troy will help you out -- because i quit
this is ridiculous
you 're ridiculous
i 'm ridiculous
eve
scare me why do n't you
you stupid son of a bitch
i 'm really sorry
what in the hell are you doing here
you 're supposed to be over on san vicente boulevard having unsafe sex with that slut sophie
i know
and i 'm really sorry
well you should be
thanks to you my heart is in my neck
what
goodnight
eve if you 'll let me i can --
look
i 'm limping
how attractive is that
what if this is for life
i know first aid
well you had better
there
thanks
uh huh
adam
yes eve
i want you to go back to the hotel now
i 'll call you a cab
of course
i should n't be over here at this hour
that 's right
and i 'll see you in the morning in the lobby
do you mind waiting outside for the taxi
not at all
and eve thank you for tonight
and for the kiss
my first
my pleasure
it was at least as good as the sky
really
okay
and i think better than the ocean
i 'm serious
neat
goodnight
hi eve
hi adam
this is uh
adam
you should go with dr. aron
it 's the best thing
the best thing for you
i promise
... all right eve
if you say so
... i do
could i please just go home
i was lost but this morning i found home and i promise not to bother any of you ever again
no
see
i ca n't tell them that
i ca n't ever let them know
it makes their life
well frankly
a joke
i ca n't let that happen
you understand
we can make this work adam
believe me
i 'm very good at making things work
my mother 's like that
is that a birthday cake
yes it is
gee ma nee
is this because of the radiation
what
nothing
good evening
i want to stay at this hotel
fill this out please
and i 'll need a card
a card
yes sir
of course
this is what money looks like
it comes like this in coin or like this in paper
or you can have an investment
these are stock certificates that we bought in your name
of course they 're worthless now but at one time they were quite valuable
they 're pretty
can i have them
sure
now let 's move on to our french exam
latin exam dad
it 's tuesday
you 're right
it 's tuesday already
by gosh time flies does n't it
tempus fugit
en arte voluptus
que les bons temps roul
gerade aus dann links
sorgen sie bitte dafur das die gepack sorgfaltic behandeldt warren
haben sie etuas nettes in leder
you know you have a wonderful sense of humor son
i must say the acorn does n't fall very far from the tree
by the way it 's time i gave you something
come with me
these are wonderful
it 's my entire baseball collection
it 's yours now
what 's baseball
it 's a game son
i can explain it pretty easily
there 's a pitcher
like a painting
no son
a pitcher
like one of mom 's
uh no
there 's a man who throws the ball -- to a man who has a bat
the nocturnal flying mammal
no
sit down
no no
the runner on second goes to third
he 's out there
why
because he 's forced out at third
it 's a force
then why go there
because he must
thank you mom
thanks dad
blow out the candles
oh boy
a jacket
your mom made that all by herself
no kidding
holy cow
what the heck are these
your roller skates
i redesigned them
i think this new design will work even better
these are really swell
i mean swell
well do we just go on up
no son
we wait for night
now
is precisely when
we must be at our
most cautious
helen thomas webber
maybe we have been down here a little too long
please excuse her french
shit is a french word
also
stay out of the adult bookstore
adult bookstore
why
poison gas
invisible
do n't forget
i promise
is that all
one more thing
if you find a healthy young woman bring her back with you
i 'll try
but i do n't understand
and i 'm asking you to trust me without understanding why
well in that case
of course son
this is great son just great
by the way eve 's last name
rus to kov that 's not russian is it
it 's ukrainian
her grandparents immigrated here
uh huh
dad i do n't know how to tell you this
and i was going to wait a while but i think
dad there was no bomb
a plane crashed into our backyard
i looked it up in old newspapers
you 're sure
positive
the soviet union collapsed without a shot being fired
the cold war is over
that 's what everybody believes
yes sir
it 's true
what
did the politburo just one day say we give up
yes
that 's kind of how it was
uh huh
my gosh those commies are brilliant
you 've got to hand it to 'em
no we did n't drop any bombs
oh yes our evil empire has collapsed
poor poor us
i bet they 've even asked the west for aid
right
uh i think they have
hah
those cagey rascals
those sly dissemblers
those uh
they 've finally pulled the wool over everybody 's eyes
you have very nice ceilings
i do
well thank you
you like ceilings
not particularly
well i hope you like these
fresh sea urchin wrapped in seaweed
or nori if you prefer
i love sushi
i love lucy
you nut
it 's a very small place
people do n't even know it 's there
and it 's called
maybe eve can guess
she 's psychic
really
since when
right on the button
well dionne warwick guess his home town
that 's right
i 've never met anyone like you in my life
she 's right
this must be very new
yeah
it 's so small
what are you talking about
this is the new mac
you a hacker
i do n't think so
you do n't have a computer in your cabin
no
how do you get through those winters
well you 're right
juneau
what 's the highest peak
mt. mckinley
it 's also the highest point in north america
okay maybe she is psychic
let 's go eat
that would knock my father out
yeah
oh yes
it would probably kill him
he 's a windows guy then huh
yes
he likes windows
well i think windows stink
what do you think of that
... i guess it's
just a matter of personal taste
true
not on him
i 'm not wearing his pants
why not
he has great pants
i just do n't want to
okay
is n't it a little tiring to sit up straight like that
no
i guess a lot of those tall buildings we saw this morning are new
almost all of them
the recovery is very impressive
the recovery
oh yeah
hey they rebuilt the freeway in six months
amazing
i 'm very impressed
that 's why little things mean so much to him
i love this
why did you park way back there
miss rustokov refuses to let total strangers drive her car
oh
i see
what
ladies first troy
that was close
yes
lying is always a very effective dating tool
okay
thank you my friends
good bye adam
goodbye
bye troy
bye adam
and thanks for always being happy
what
you dial nine to get out
of what
the hotel
i see
well thank you very much
you 've been very very nice
thank you
your father is a smart guy
my father is a genius
no kiddin
well
good night
good night
sleep tight
do n't let the bedbugs bite
that 's what my mom always says
who i 'm really beginning to miss
i 'm sorry
it 's my first night away from home
how old are you
thirty five
you do n't look thirty five
how old do i look
twenty five
around there
i guess living up here makes people look older
up here on the fifteenth floor
yes
up here on the fifteenth floor
goodnight
goodnight
what
what is it
the sky
the sky
where
up there
i do n't see anything
just look
help you
yes please
i 'm looking for all beef patties
come on
frozen
how much are they
frozen they 're six thirty a dozen in the three pound box
then i 'll need twelve into nine hundred seventy five boxes
and that 's almost
five hundred dollars just for the hamburger
and my mom only gave me three thousand dollars for everything
the yacht batteries
the diesel oil
the birthday candles
you could have a meat order that big delivered to your home
sure
well that 's great then
terrific
except
it just occurred to me
i do n't know where i live
i 'm lost
i do n't know where home is
would you excuse me
gladly
how -- how much do you want for the mickey mantle rookie season
i was thinking of selling all the cards
really
no kidding
see my problem is all i have are hundred dollar bills and i need something smaller
ones fives tens
like that
i see what ya mean
tell you what
i'll give you five hundred dollars in small bills for the whole box
oh that would be wonderful
well we 're here to help
sir
i would really appreciate it if you would n't take the lord 's name in vain again
oh you got a problem with that
i did n't want to leave without saying how much i admire your jewelry
hey smart ass how 'bout i kick your butt
oh
a nice one i hope
yes ma'am
elbows son
sorry mom
you never know
you may someday dine at the white house with the president
dad
oh no
oh my goodness
let 's get him into the bedroom
he seems to be doing all right now
i do n't know if he 's had a heart attack or just
a horrifying experience
but we need supplies and i 've got to stay with him
i 'll go up
right
i just hope this is still good up there
mom
yes
i was thinking that uh
you know while i was up there and all
that maybe i could you know
try to meet a girl
i 've been thinking about that a little
just these last
fifteen years or so
oh adam that would be wonderful if you could find a girl
one who 's not a mutant
and hopefully comes from pasadena
nothing against valley girls but in my day anyhow the girls from pasadena i do n't know
always just seemed a little nicer
yes ma'am
here 's the shopping list and 3,000 which should take care of everything
yes ma'am
your father has a few final words for you
you know he 'd fight a buzz saw for you he loves you so much
we both do
heck i know that mom
you 're my parents
... and his church group have volunteered to help us bring the supplies down
but we 've got to hurry
are you in trouble son
i think i 'm being chased by a psychiatrist
a psychiatrist
mom
eve and i have to go
what
i ca n't explain it now
but i want you to set the locks for two months
you have more than enough of everything
then we 'll be back to get you
we have to go
no wait
at least stay for dinner
this is your bedroom
no mom i 've turned it into dad 's office
well where are you --
eve and i
eloped
we 're married
no
yes
you got a light honey
what
a light
yes i 've got a light
good
so
you
survived the blast did you
the blast
honey i have survived a host of things
like the song says a country boy can survive
yes yes the song
so tell me
has it been
hell up here
hell up here
honey it 's been hell up here down there and over yonder
hell everywhere
yes i can tell that just looking around
boy
did you say you were a country boy
cute little old man if you want a boy i can be a boy
and if you want a girl i can be a girl
i can be anything you want me to be
really
uh huh
and it 's all yours for the remarkably low price of only 200
and if you act now i might even throw in some free lawn furniture
no i ca n't
i 'm sorry
i have to go
i have to
for pete 's sake calvin
we 've got guests
sorry honey
i just got to fooling with this darn rheostat
well put it down and come in
you bet hon
i 'm sorry everyone but given this extraordinary turn of events i think it 's prudent that we cut the evening short
i 'm sure this cuban thing will resolve itself but in the meantime
i'd suggest taking a prayerful watch and wait stance
we 'll do this again
maybe next week
here 's your hat
could i wrap something up for you
did you have a coat
it 's time
time
oh no calvin
it 's not time yet
i still have--
it shuts off automatically
did you rig it to do that
you 're so clever
no
they all do
i never know anymore
you hear that
yes
calvin i wish you would have at least let me do the dishes
it 's not going to be that easy getting all that dried- on food off my nice plates
i just hope those plates are n't radioactive by tomorrow morning
cheese is particularly troublesome
worse than your kraft holiday dip
oh much worse
but not as bad as that mexican jumping bean dip
you remember that
yeah yeah
okay
give me the roast and watch your step
i 'll come back for the radio
what 's that noise
the locks
the locks
to keep us from trying to leave
after an atomic blast there 's a radiation half life that lasts thirty five years
thirty -five years
then after that it 's safe
it 's safe
to go up
to go up
hi honey
feeling better
no
we have to be strong sweetheart
if not for ourselves for the child
all our friends
burnt to a crisp
i 've given you the most well done cut
i 'm not hungry
hot dr. pepper
your favorite
no calvin you 're favorite
really
maybe i 've just got the creeps
how could you
this is just like home
no
no
calvin this is different
believe me
would you like a tranquilizer
you have tranquilizers
i told you
i 've got everything
oh no
what
uh oh
now it 's time
honey
is there a problem
no calvin
babies cry
i 've noticed
what shall we call him
watch this
what
not bad for a three and a half year old
i 'd like to see the public school system match that
i do n't care how terrific it is
yes he 's very bright dear
much like his father
but you know calvin maybe he 's a little
young for school
nonsense
people have no idea what the human mind is capable of
look at us
yes you certainly will
and you 'll find a nice girl and rebuild america
just the way it used to be
oh calvin i 'm not sure we should be making promises that perhaps ca n't be kept
i believe there will be other survivors
in fact i 'm guessing there 's life on the surface even now
it 's not life worth living perhaps but believe me something 's moving around up there
and i do n't just mean the cockroaches
hi honey
hi
calvin
coming
get the presents and do the lights
you bet
no kidding
who else would have done it
and i made these
what did you wish for adam
if he tells it wo n't come true
oh that 's just a bunch of baloney
we never believed that in my family
well we did in my family
if we still have one
yes
you know when we do go up
i'm going to miss this old place
how 'bout you hon
would you excuse me
sure
in the generator room again
oh yes
it just fascinates me how all these things work
i know exactly what you mean
hey honey
should we say a little prayer first
just open the door
yes yes it is
it 's an archaic colloquialism roughly meaning
"good
yes
that 's right
i 'm going to give it to you straight
there 's no point in beating around the bush
there were survivors
apparently the fallout has created
a subspecies of mutants
mutants
it 's not a pretty sight
some eat out of garbage cans
others are
cover your ears son and hum
i mean that literally and i mean right now
others are
multi sexual
it seems
they can be both masculine and feminine
simultaneously
no
yes
i do n't believe it
they 've done a lot of re building but society at least as we knew it has utterly collapsed
people throw up in the streets
others point guns
there 's something terribly wrong with the automobiles and
and i
i ca n't tell you the rest
i just ca n't
oh my
oh my oh my oh my
so what do we do now
we stay down here
we do
yes
excuse me
for how long
we 've just about run out of everything
we 'll make do
i 'm of the opinion that these mutants will eventually kill each other off and then--
no calvin
we 're not going to make do
not me
not adam
we 're going up no matter what
we deserve it
even if it 's terrible
well i am the head of this household--
i want him to at least see the sky
--and we will--
and the ocean
a mountain range
--do as i say
how long will you set it for this time
i thought ten years
well that's
considerably shorter than before
i was wondering calvin why set the locks at all
i mean the radiation is gone and
to keep what 's up there from getting down here
it 's not the radiation i 'm worried about
well please excuse us
we
we have n't entertained a guest in
um
some time
what can i offer you eve
what are you bitching about now
what are you doing here
i forgot some of my stuff
your stuff
let me see that
you came back for these
hey they 're ralph laurens
and who 's this interesting looking fellow
this is adam
adam meet cliff
go home cliff wherever that might be
shana gillroy 's apartment
remember her
the model who went to harvard
well i better get going
bye adam
nice coat
so where is your roommate the model
you know i do n't know
and looking at you i do n't care
it 's been too long eve
go home adam
go to your hotel
yeah
before i kick your ass
stop it you two
i guess we should n't fight in here
since that guy rear ended me in palm springs
oh yes
i even guessed his hotel did n't i
give me your hand
oh my god
but first you have to start with the clothes
exactly
you understand that do n't you
you have no chance of meeting a woman dressed like that
i do n't know
money is no object
he 's got cards up the wazoo
you 're serious are n't you
what 's that supposed to mean
it means that your taste in men 's apparel is as bad as your taste in men
well that 's blunt
i 'm sorry
but if the shoe fits
and i suppose you see him in some sort of strapless thing do n't you
i see elegant
yeah
like ralph lauren
that 's what i 'm sensing
alright i will
i 'm busy tomorrow anyway
i have to buy six thousand paper napkins
what do you think adam
well what do you think
i think
it
works
let me show you the entire trousseau
how 'bout it eve
can he skate around your block
no
are you kidding
you would n't even be a crumb on her table
you do n't see that
eve
well i 'm trying to educate him
it 's nothing personal
adam i think for you we should go for sweet
um
eve
it 's not so much what you say but how you say it
women like men who are unpredictable
go to the bathroom
right here
well you 're being so bossy i was n't sure
he go back to the hotel
uh
he might of
what 's that mean
we did not leave together
who did he leave with
what 's it to you
i 'm his pimp
he left with the dancers did n't he
hey you 're the psychic
eve the psychic pimp
you tell me
those sluts
yeah
but who 's not a slut these days
where are you going
to bed
to bed
yeah
i 'm not the one who 's in love with the guy
what
now hold on
wait one damn minute
in the first place i do n't fall in love with weirdos i 've only known for four or five days
yes you do
and i do n't fall in love with grown men who collect baseball cards
uh yes you do
or pee in their pants when they see the ocean
yes you do
or have perfect table manners
you know i asked him about that
and he said that good manners are a way we have of showing other people that we respect them
see you 'd eat like a slob if you were alone but since another human being is present you show that person respect by going to the trouble of having proper manners
i did n't know that
i thought it was a way of appearing superior
know what else he told me
what
he thinks that i am a gentleman and that you are a lady
well consider the source
i do n't even know what a lady is
exactly
i thought a gentleman was somebody who owned horses
turns out the short and very simple definition of a gentleman or a lady is someone who always attempts to make the people around him or her feel as comfortable as possible
that 's it
if you do n't do that nothing else matters
the cars the clothes the houses
where did he get all that information
from the oddest place
his parent 's told him
i do n't think i got that memo
so now i suppose he 's trying to make those two dancers feel as comfortable as possible
he did n't leave with them
well
i admit it
i 'm glad to hear that
he left with sophie
what
it 's true
she swept him out the door whispering little french things into his ear
oh no
not sophie
no way
please do n't tell me that
well what was i supposed to do
he wants me to live underground with him
that 's like silence of the lambs do n't you think
i know
i know
you did the right thing
oh no
what
gay
oh
well you're
certainly welcome
good god
you do n't think there really is a bomb shelter do you
fallout shelter
what do you want to do with it
give it back to him
and if we ca n't find him
we 'll find him
what 's wrong
i do n't know
everything 's so neat
it 's all just so
goddamn dear
damn
see these
found them in the box with the cards
these are stock certificates
ibm
at&t. polaroid
millions upon millions upon millions
the cards
the stock
the clothes
the toothpaste
the guy was on the level
and you blew it
a man walks into your life who is the kindest most polite honest trustworthy incredibly rich guy you have ever met in your life
and what do you do
have him committed
yeah
that 's thinking
he was always so nice
how was i supposed to know that 's a good thing
nice is weird
nice is
what is nice
it 's not cool
i 'll tell you that
was it ever
i do n't know
i like to think so
well at least i fell for him before i found out he was rich
that 's new
wait a minute
he said today he knew where home was
what happened this morning
where did you go
to get some frozen poultry
then what
we came back to the house
you did n't stop anywhere else
no
no wait a minute
we stopped at a porno store
what
an adult bookstore
he was very excited about seeing it
you think home is under a dirty bookstore in the valley
come on
why would you put a fallout shelter under a porno shop
none of this stuff was here in 1962
the valley was mostly small homes and fruit orchards
well we 've come a long way have n't we
i want to go home
yeah
maybe he 'll call
i ca n't tell the boys from the girls anymore
uh
yeah
it 's like hard
i miss those nice flower power kids
how 'bout you
um
uh
i 'm selling this place
i want out of this hell hole
could i like
oh wow
like uh
buy it from me
yeah
yeah that 's it
i 'll give it to ya no money down
the neighborhood has gone to hell anyway
tower
wolf one
i 've got a problem here
say your problem wolf one
are you declaring an emergency
stand by
one
wolf one -- say intentions
i 've got secondaries of an engine fire and i 'll need to find a clear area to eject
roger wolf one
can you make it to the ocean
tower say again
the sar helo is airborne with you in sight
i 'm marking the 180 radial for five and ejecting
roger wolf one
i sent a trunk home yesterday
this is all i have
you look good jeffrey
did you have a nice flight
yeah
how 's dad
i think it 's important not to get depressed
depression is a terrible thing
they say it can bring on illness
aunt barbara
i 'll try not to get depressed
will you tell mom when she gets home from the hospital that i 've gone to dinner at sandy williams house
okay honey
that sounds nice
jeffrey
i think you 've got termites in the house
oh yeah
have you seen any
i 've seen a few
well i have n't seen any
i would n't worry about it
look i better go
okay honey
i do n't want to talk about it
everything 's okay now
i do n't want to talk about it
sometimes it helps to talk things over
for instance many marriages are saved by
aunt barbara
i love you but you 're not gon na get it
frank
come in
hey i brought some friends
and some beer
fine
welcome
come sit down
suave
goddam are you suave you fucker
you want some beer
certainly frank
darling get some glasses
we 'll have some beer with frank
wo n't you sit down
shit ben
how the shit are ya
fine frank
fine
how are you
fuckin good real fuckin good
you know this little tid bit dorothy and this thing here is a neighbor
what the shit we 're doin' with a neighbor i do n't know
goddam
this is the suavest guy i know
look at you
you 're one beautiful fucker ben
i love this jacket and that cigarette holder of yours
shit that is too fuckin much
where 's those glasses
this beer 's gon na get too warm
i ca n't stand fuckin warm beer
it makes me puke
darling where are the glasses
oh here they are
to your health frank
shit
let 's drink to something else
let 's drink to fuckin
say here 's to your fuck frank
if you like frank
here 's to your fuck
cheers
frank i have something for you
excuse us everyone
excuse us por favor
hey
let tits see her kid
see you tuesday frank
right ben
let 's go fuck
i 'll fuck anything that moves
come into the study a minute
excuse me mrs. williams
detective williams here
yeah
tell him to go to sergeant milton
yeah copy
well jeffrey you found something which is very interesting to us
very interesting
i know you must be curious to know more
but
i 'm afraid i 'm going to have to ask you not only not to tell anyone about your find but also not to ask more about the case
one day when it 's all sewed up i 'll let you know all the details
right now though i ca n't
i understand
i 'm just real curious like you said
i was the same way when i was your age
i guess that 's what got me into this business
it must be great
and it 's horrible too
i 'm sorry jeffrey
that 's the way it has to be
anyway
i 'm sure you do understand
jeffrey
yes
if you want to come up a minute i 'll show you some pictures
these are beautiful
how 's the case coming
okay
anything you can tell me
the criminals are winning
is that why you say it 's horrible
yes
i guess you 've seen some bad things
yes i have so bad i would n't poison your mind by telling you
why do you do it
i wo n't let the bastards get me up against the wall
it 's an act of defiance
yeah
i get it
what is this
what color is it
blue
it 's blue velvet
what color is it
it 's blue
blue velvet
jeffrey
come on in
hi
hi sandy
i 'm sorry to bother you but i 've got to talk to you
okay come on in
looks like you had a bad face lift
yeah
okay
okay i got ta tell you
i 've discovered some things
anyway i have to show you some pictures and tell you some things about them
the first picture is this
detective williams
detective williams
detective williams here
is that you jeffrey
yes it 's me
frank is on his way up to dorothy 's apartment
oh no
frank has a radio and is hearing everything we say
detective williams
hurry
i 'm in the apartment
hurry
i 'm hiding in the back bedroom
we 're ten minutes away and moving as fast as we can
because of your information i alerted internal affairs to check out detective gordon
i had to keep on with him as if nothing was different
he slipped off on his own when he found out we were going to raid frank 's place
does dorothy know her husband is dead
not yet
oh my god
is her son ok
yes
what is it
pest control got ta do your apartment
oh god that stuff stinks
nope it 's new stuff
no smell
oh yeah that 's good
that oughta do it
yeah
get out of there
get out
put your hands up on your head
go on
get down on your knees do it
what are you doing
who are you
what 's your name
what 's your name
jeffrey
jeffrey
jeffrey what
jeffrey nothing
you tell me
let me see that wallet
jeffrey beaumont
what 're you doing in my apartment jeffrey beaumont
i wanted to see you
what
are you kidding me
who sent you here
nobody
shit
you better tell me something
i was an experiment
just to see if i could do it
an experiment
hey i 've seen you before
i sprayed your apartment
i took your key
i really did n't mean to do anything but see you
tell me what you saw tonight
tell me
i saw you come in talk on the phone
get undressed
the phone
what did you hear on the phone
tell me
word for word
you said hello to frank
you wanted to talk to someone
don
and little donny
you said something about momma loves you
and something about a meadow lane
something in an hour
i do n't remember any more
that 's right
that 's what i said
you have a good memory
then what
well
then what
then you got undressed
how many times have you sneaked into girls apartments and watched them undress
never before this
how 'd you like it if someone sneaked into your house and watched you
get undressed
i want to see you
no
come on
no you come on
take off your pants
i want to see you
look
i 'm sorry
just let me leave
no way
what do you want from me
i i do n't know
what do you want
do you like that
yes
don
no
don
hold me
i 'm scared
hold me
please
thank you
honey
it 's okay
it 's okay
do you like the way i feel
yes
see my breasts
see
yes
see my nipples
yes
you can kiss them if you want
feel them
they 're getting hard
you can hit me if you want to
no please
i wo n't
do you like me
yes i like you
you can be my special friend and come and put that in me
i made it go down the toilet
what
next christmas
is he santa claus who has left a present for dorothy
what was it
an ear
another ear
what was it
do you know
no
you do n't
no
what is happening
maybe you do n't know
i know you though
you 're jeffrey beaumont and i know where you live and i know ways to get you and i know ways to kill you
please do n't talk like that
you 're upset
i 'm not helping you
i 'm sorry for what i did
i better go
go then
i ca n't let you put it in me now but i want you
i like you
then do n't talk about killing
did i say that
i did n't mean it or did i
sometimes i think it would be fun
go ahead you better leave now
i ca n't open myself to you now
i 'll tell you a little secret
i want to die
do n't say that
it 's a secret so do n't tell anyone
some day i 'll show you where
i 've got ta go to sleep now
ok
i liked being with you last night
same here
oh shit
frank
can you stand up
i 'm alright
go hide
this wo n't take long
be quiet
nice guy
who 's he
who 's it you mean
oh god
don
why ca n't i just die
there you go again
stop saying that
you can make it
i ca n't
i ca n't
you think you know so much
take it easy
what 's goin' on anyway
why are you in so much trouble
look
no
falling
no
please dorothy
why are you in so much trouble
who is don
don
are you in with them
no
but you 're in very big trouble
why are you so interested
why do you keep asking me
i came back to help you
you said do i let girls sneak into my house
you know where i live
if you need to come to where i live ok
who are you
maybe i 'll need to
you like me huh
yes
or do you just want me
i 'm going to let you enter me now
no
i should go
please please stay
come in
hello
it used to make me laugh but
i 'm sorry maybe i better go dorothy
yes
frank--
frank is coming
no
how could he
do n't go
you think i 'm crazy do n't you
i want you to stay
do n't hate me
i sure do n't hate you
i 'm not crazy
i know the difference between right and wrong
that 's good
you like to open me do n't you
yes
what if i told frank that you opened me
that would n't be too good would it
frank would open you
okay
i know you 've been scared
now you want to scare someone
does that scare you
shut up
beeeee careful
come on dorothy
what if frank came over here and found us
look snap out of it will ya
kiss me
do you love me
do you love me
i asked first
sometimes i think i do
and sometimes you think you do n't
well get away then
wait a minute
wait
whatiya want
for cryin out loud
just get outta my bed
i love you don with all my heart
no it 's not don
i did n't mean to hurt you
shhhhhh
now i have your disease
you what
you put your disease in me
your semen
it 's hot and full of disease
there 's no disease i can tell you
men are crazy
then they put their craziness into me
then it makes me crazy
then they are n't so crazy for awhile
then they put their craziness in me again
it 's burning me but i love you
i do i do
did you know that
did you know that i love you
i 'm glad you do
there 's so much i want to tell you
i 'm in so much darkness though with things moving
there is darkness sucking me
it 's kissing me and darkness is entering me
in every hole
it 's opening me to a death
dorothy
no
if i die then they 'll be free
it 's getting late is n't it
i can tell it 's a cold feeling when it 's late
it 's warm then it gets cold
jeffrey
i feel it getting cold
you called me jeffrey
i did
are you
yes
why are you here
hmmmmmmmm
ok
no
not really
but also because i really want you to be alright
i guess i should go
i want you to stay with me
i think i better go
yeah it 's me
oh god jeffrey is that you
oh god
where have you been
oh god they hurt him jeffrey
jeffrey jeffrey jeffrey hold me
hold me
oh god
it 's okay
it 's okay
my secret lover
they hurt his head
who dorothy
don
help him
help him
donny
hold me don
don
where is he
help him
promise me you 'll help him
i promise dorothy
i promise
hold me
i'm falling
frank gone
yeah but get outta here
he 's comin back
bull
alright suit yourself
he 's comin back
what for
'cause he 's comin back that 's what for
frank 's got you really loaded tonight
yeah maybe so
frank 's got me and you and really it 's all thanks to don is n't it
remember that
your husband was the one who started fucking my mind with drugs
oh he forced you huh
he 's the reformed dealer though who wanted to turn himself in
he 's the one that caused frank to come and frank 's fucking us real good
i just feel so horny
i 'm supposed to be here watching you why ca n't i be here fucking you
listen
i know his cock 's the size of a pin let me give you the real thing
let me wet my whistle baby
no way get out
i 'm gon na tell frank
i 'm gon na tell him what you said
okay i 'm goin'
you 'll see i 'll get you
hello baby
shut up
it 's daddy shit head
hello daddy
my bourbon
mommy
mommy 's here
baby wants to fuck
who 's this fuck
he 's a friend
from the neighborhood
we were just talking
from the neighborhood
shut the fuck up
you like telephones
huh
you wanta go for a ride
do n't say please fuckhead
what are these
those are my breasts
can i feel 'em
if you want to
frank he did n't mean it
leave him alone
come on
he did n't mean it
shut up
gimme your lipstick
hey pretty pretty
we 're looking for him
in your opinion why did frank kidnap dorothy 's son and husband
he became obsessed with her
she hated him
he had to have her
he kidnapped them to control her
to make her do things
then she wanted to commit suicide so he started cutting off ears as a warning to her to stay alive
i 'm not kidding
frank loved blue blue velvet
he had to have dorothy cause her whole life was blue
you seemed to see some very interesting things on your little escapade with dorothy vallens
yeah
i guess i did
what 's going to happen to me
we 're going to leave that up to detective williams
i 'll tell you though you 're okay
you shot a real son of a bitch
yeah
i sure know that
yeah but how many more are out there
hello
speak to me fucker
no thanks
no thanks
what does that mean
i do n't want to go
go where
on a ride
a ride
hell that 's a good idea
okay let 's go
hey let 's go
heineken
fuck that shit
pabst blue ribbon
hey neighbor
here 's to ben
here 's to ben
do you see ben
i can make him do anything i fuckin please
hey
you like to walk
what
let 's take our neighbor out
let him fuckin walk back
come on
i wancha to meet a frienda mine
raymond get enough beer for ben too
okay frank
what kinda beer do you like
raymond
where 's the fuckin beer
right here frank
you want me to pour it
no i want ya to fuck it
shit yes pour the fuckin beer
there ya go
good let 's drink up
i mean for good jeffrey
for good
i ca n't mom
not right in the middle of the term
jeffrey honey
your father 's condition is serious
it 's going to cost so much
we just wo n't have the money to keep you in school
i 'm telling you this now so that you can get your things together and check out of school honey or whatever you have to do it 'll save you another trip back
you 're going to have to work at the store
mom
where 's all your things jeffrey
this is it
jeffrey breakfast is ready
be right down
what time are visiting hours
i 've made arrangements with dr. gynde for 10:30
but jeffrey you 'll have to walk over i need the car this morning
well
okay
jeffrey when you see your father
yeah
he does n't know you 're out of school
he thinks it 's a vacation for you
what
it would be too much for him
so please let him think as he does that you 're home just to see him
thanks a lot mom
jeffrey
nobody wanted you to leave school and go to work in the store maybe going back to school will be an option one day
i hope so
i 'm going out for awhile
do you want the car
no i 'm just gon na walk around
alright
can i use the car tonight
of course jeffrey
i was sorry to hear about your father
i know your mother from church
it 's such a shame
yeah i know
would you like a piece of cake
no
no thank you
it 's a real good chocolate cake
duncan hines devil 's food
real good
yeah
okay
he comes over to study
yeah
mrs. williams
thanks for the cake
oh you 're welcome
nice to finally meet you jeffrey
say goodnight to sandy
here you are
would anyone like coffee
that sounds great
anyone else
alright jeffrey just a minute
please excuse me a moment jeffrey and i 'll get to the dishes
sure thing please do n't worry about me
can i help you with the dishes
nice of you to offer jeffrey but certainly not
just relax and enjoy your coffee
i 'm sure sandy will be back soon
sandy
sandy please
i 'll get a coat for her
no
looks like you 'd make a good runner
well
i mean you do n't exactly have the build for a football
i mean no offense
no you 're right
i mean some guys play anyway but they usually get slaughtered
yeah well i never wanted to get slaughtered much
well most guys do n't
i mean that 's the point
you all mind if i take my vitamins
looks like they 've got you strapped in pretty good
uh uh
are you feeling okay
uh uh
good to see you son
it 's good to see you dad
how ya doin' dad
hey jeff
i 'm feelin so much better
good deal dad
yeah how did you know
i just know that 's all
i remember you from central
oh yeah
you were pretty popular
did n't you run for some office
yeah i did treasurer
should n't you be studying or something
am i bothering you
no
you 're not bothering me
you a senior
yes
how is central these days
terrible boring
what else is new
right
yeah
what are you doing now
i 'm home from school
my father 's in the hospital
that 's too bad
what do you know about the ear
anything
did n't my father tell you not to talk about it
come on you brought it up
do you know anything
i do n't really know much but bits and pieces
i hear things
my room is right above my father 's office
the ear there 's no corpse in the morgue missing an ear and it did come off a living person
that 's direct from the coroner 's office
the person is unknown
there are a couple of cases i get mixed up on but i think there are some people who were brought in for questioning on a murder case that could have something to do with the ear
i heard some of the same names
do you know who was brought in for questioning
there were at least three maybe four
but a name that keeps coming up is this woman who lives in an apartment building very close to your house and also close to the field where you found the ear
there 's also a business man over by the franklin factory district that was questioned
and a musician
and some others
were all these people questioned this afternoon
no this has been going on for some time
several months
about six months ago some parts of bodies were found down by the river
they were from people who were reported missing
they never found one complete body only parts
the ear is from a missing person maybe
maybe so
it 's a strange world is n't it
do you know what building the woman lives in
yeah
it 's close by that 's what 's creepy
they 've had her under surveillance for a couple of months except i do n't know what they 've found out because my father is n't in charge of her
i guess you have to get back home soon
not really why
you want to see the building
come on i 'll show you
that 's the building
she lives on the seventh floor
do n't stop to look long the police are watching
where are they
i do n't know you 're not supposed to see them
they 're supposed to see you
did they find out anything when they questioned her
i do n't know like i said she 's not my father 's case
oh yeah
what about those other people
anything
my father is watching the businessman
the businessman had a partner who disappeared
left his whole business and family his wife and two kids
they think he 's been murdered
you really do hear a lot do n't you
yeah i guess so
what are you going to do now that you 're home
i have to help out in my father 's hardware store
they 're giving me sort of my own hours for a while which is nice
still it must be kinda rough
it 's not bad but it 's bad enough
it 's a lot worse for my father
i used to know a kid who lived there and who had the biggest tongue in the world
what happened to him
i do n't know
he moved away
you hungry or thirsty or both
i do n't know
i 'd like to talk to you about something
just a minute pull over and wait a minute
i do n't want to cause any trouble
i 'm here are n't i
i guess mike 's got some sort of sports practice in the afternoon
ooooo you are smart
just do n't get too smart
alright now tell me
what is it
there are opportunities in life for gaining knowledge and experience
sometimes in some cases it 's necessary to take a risk
i got to thinking
i 'll bet a person could learn a lot by getting into that woman 's apartment you know sneak in and hide and observe
you said it was a strange world
and you 're the strangest part of it
are you crazy
she is possibly involved in murder
this gives me the creeps
settle down
i have a plan which i think will work
there is very little for you to do but i do need your help
are n't you curious about my plan
it would n't hurt to hear the plan i guess
alright
the first thing is to get into her apartment and open a window that i could crawl into later
now how are you going to do that
right out in the car i happen to have some old overalls and a bug spraying rig
i will go to her apartment and be the pest control man
i will spray her apartment
after a few minutes you will knock on her door drawing her attention away from me and i will then jimmy a window
what will i say when she comes to the door
you will be a jehovah 's witness
i have a few awake magazines for you
you do n't have to keep her very long
a few seconds is all i 'll need
whatiya think
i do n't know it sounds like a good daydream but actually doing it is too weird
too dangerous
let 's just try the first part
if that goes well we 'll see about the rest
no one will suspect us because no one would believe two people like us would be crazy enough to do something like this
you 've got a point there
now we 'll walk over so there 's no license plates and you give me at least three minutes
i can stall if it 's more but i need time to find a good window alright
alright
let 's go
okay i 'm going ahead
wait a minute what 's her name
oh brother
dorothy vallens seventh floor
look on the mailbox for her number bright boy
thanks
dorothy vallens
okay goodluck
three minutes no sooner
alright
good luck yourself
are you alright
yeah let 's get outta here
what happened
i was just about to go to the door when that man did my job for me
was it alright
yes and no
did you recognize him
no
i only saw his back
he went down another stairwell at the end of the hall
i did n't get a good look at him either but he sure looked at me
i did n't have time to get a window but i found this key
pretty nifty huh
yeah if it opens the door
yeah
so what 's next
pretty clever
are you game for more
i owe you since i goofed up this one
you did n't goof it up but you still owe me one
i want to sneak in tonight
it 's friday do you have a date tonight
yes
i do
well it 's friday night and you 're a beautiful girl
i guess you would have a date that does that
what 's the plan
first of all we 're going to the slow club to see dorothy vallens
we 'll watch her for awhile
i 'd like to hear her sing anyway and then also we 'll know she is there and not in her apartment
brilliant
then we 'll drive back to her apartment and i will plant myself there
this is not my usual friday night
that sounds good
two
here 's to
an interesting experience
i 'll drink to that
jeffrey i do n't think you ought to do it
why not
it 's crazy and dangerous
my god i should n't have told you
it 'll be okay
i do n't think you should wait out here though
i think you should go home
can you drive this car
yeah but
leave it in the front of your house for me okay
ok
could you wait a little while this key may not fit
i wish you would n't do this
it does n't make any sense
let 's go somewhere and have some coffee
i 'm going in sandy
i 'll see you tomorrow and tell you how it went
i i do n't want to see you tomorrow
mike 's coming over
oh okay can i call
okay yeah call
look it can wait till sunday
call tomorrow
it 's okay
good luck
i hope you can sneak out okay
you 're going to wait until she 's asleep
yeah
i 'm going to wait here until she comes
are you sure
i 'll honk four times so you 'll hear it and know she 's on her way up
okay
okay thanks
i do n't know if you 're a detective or a pervert
that 's for me to know and for you to find out
i 'll see you
i mean call you okay
okay okay
bye
well how did it go
what happened
well i 've found out some things nothing really for certain
there are some strange people involved
what did you see
well
maybe we should discuss this somewhere else you know what i mean
what 's with mike
he got a little jealous
i 'm sorry i did n't
it 's okay
do n't worry about it
you want a dairy queen
no way
i 'm about to blow up
okay be careful
okay sandy
can i give you a kiss good night
you better not jeffrey
okay okay
goodnight
see ya tomorrow
you were late
i 'm really sorry
what am i going to do
you want to go talk to him
yeah but i do n't think it 's going to do much good
let 's go
i 'll try to talk to him later
you know that cheese is practically all chemicals
that 's what makes it so good
you wanta hear what i saw today
shoot
number one
i saw the yellow man go into frank 's building laughing with frank
now the only trouble is what does this prove
nothing really but it 's interesting
they know each other
they seem to like each other
maybe
but i think the yellow man is on drugs
i think frank supplies him
oh yeah
number two
i saw the yellow man come out
this time with a well- dressed man with an alligator briefcase
they drove down this factory building and stood on a staircase looking at something in the distance
number three
now get this
in the distance was a murder
a drug dealer shot to death and a woman with her legs broken
jeffrey
then these guys told me the police will find a huge amount of drugs inside the dead man 's place
i ca n't believe what you are finding out
are you going to continue with this
are you going back to her apartment
yeah
jeffrey
why
i 'm seeing something that was always hidden
i 'm involved in a mystery
i 'm learning
and it 's all secret
you like mysteries that much
yeah you 're a mystery
i like you
very much
you worry about me really
yes
is that so surprising
yeah i worry a lot
i got you into this
great
hey i 've got a bit of a problem
i know some things that could help your father but you might get into trouble
jeffrey are they important things
well forget me you have to tell him
jeffrey i mean it
okay but i promise i wo n't mention you
okay
i 'll see him at the police station okay
see you friday night if not before
everything okay
yeah
i think so
i just had to tell him some of what i knew
is friday still on
you did n't tell him about me
no
i should never had gotten you going on this
yes jeffrey
friday 's on
okay
great
you want to dance
i ca n't dance fast
really
really
you want to dance with someone else
no
let 's wait for some slow one
just a minute
you want to dance
okay
oh my god
what 's wrong
frank
my father has a gun at home
no
sandy this guy is a killer
i promise you
dorothy
dorothy
dorothy vallens
yes
take her to my house
my dad can get an ambulance faster than anyone
do you have anything to put around her
no
is detective gordon going to be at your house
probably not
no
why
okay
let 's get her over to your father 's
right
watch out for mike there
jeffrey
what 's going on
shhh
i 'll tell you
i should go with her sandy
go ahead
sandy
go ahead
mike 's got ta go
nice to meet you
yeah nice meetin you
what are watchin this junk for
you can change it if you want to
i do n't know why we have to watch tv
mike
we do n't have to watch it
come on
sandy
could i talk to you a minute
sure just a sec
excuse me
come on out a minute okay
okay
hey come here you stole my girl you bastard
i 'm gon na kick your ass right in front of your stupid house
stop it mike
you shut up
nobody 's talkin to you
hey who 's that jeffrey
your mother
what did he bring him in for
needed an outsider
the package boy knows everyone
he 'd spot our hitters a mile away
just for him
well he 's the one shooting up all his guys right
he 's scared of the kid
says he 's real good got every available gun in the city up there
up where
up his house
i do n't know what 's going on but i know it 's got ta have something to do with this kid
oh fuck
fuck you
hey augustus i need your help i got a serious problem here
i 'm not screwing around
i bounced you on my knee at family reunions for christ sakes
your dad and me ran the whole east coast syndicate you snot nosed little prick
and when you took the wheel who was beside you
hey i just
do n't start with your shit
do n't you talk to me
oh hey uncle gussy thanks for years of service
here 's a gold watch and a job sniffing other guys shit eight hours a day
what am i a retired bus driver
i need il duce
the duke
what did you do
this kid this package boy could bring down the whole east coast
if he decides to turn states he could dismantle us
totally
but it looks like for now he 's content with just killing us one by one
and even worse the kid is good at it
i mean i had a prodigy on my hands the whole time and did n't even know it
lord 's name
mother mary full of grace
what did you do connor
well listen i know how my boys take ta scrappin when they take ta drinkin
yes mother
i mean it now
i carried the two of you little bastards around in my belly at the same time you ungrateful pissants
ya ruined my girlish figure in one fell swoop and then ya sucked me dry
my tits are saggin down ta my ankles
i trip over em for christ sakes now ya listen ta me no fighten
are ya ready
aye
yes sir
look in the trash around their hands
see if you can find me two bullet casings
45 's if my eye serves me right
do n't disturb them
mark them as they lay
newman root through this shit
if this was a sink find me some metal parts
gimme a faucet or a drain cover or something
paraffin came up positive
and bullet holes are usually a big clue
i ca n't find the second one sir
look under the body
got it
are these me considered armed and dangerous
well not armed
if they had guns they 'd have used them
but dangerous
oh yeah
look look
i 'm not saying one way or the other
just be careful and go by the protocol on this one
any tips on where these guys may be
any word back from the e.r.s
ah agent smecker we have a problem
what
the press is everywhere outside
they 're going nuts for these guys
what do you want to do
you 're not being charged
it 's up to you
do you want to talk to them
what did you do
fuckin
what the fuckin fuck
who the fuck fucked this fuckin
fuck
how did you two fuckin fucks
...... fuck
certainly illustrates the diversity of the word
what the fuck are you doing here
what huh
what
what
what
answers
i want fuckin answers
get a hold of yourself man
anybody you think is evil
yes
do n't you think that 's a little psycho
a little weird
weird huh
know what i think is weird
decent men with loving families go home every day after work
they turn on the news and see rapists murderers and child molesters all getting out of prison
climb the corporate ladder boy
don rocco
fuck it
i 'm doing it
i deserve it
i 've been working for those fat bastards since i was in high school and look at this place
donna 's gon na be angry about her cat
shit
she 's on every drug know to man
she 'd have sold that thing for a dime bag
screw her
but i do kinda feel like an ass hole
you sound real remorseful
she ai n't been around in weeks anyhow
listen
something 's been bothering me about last night
what
well
what if your boss knew how many guys were supposed to be there
in that room
what are you saying
think about it man
nine men six bullets
you think they sold me out
no way
he probably knew you 'd end up nailing the fat guy maybe one or two more but he had to know you were n't walking out of there
figure it out
shooter 's dead on the scene
no in depth investigation
it 'd slide right off his back
'cause as much as i love ya you 're not exactly don corleone
what would he be losing
a thirty- five year old delivery boy
no no
that 's just not the way things are done
besides how 's he know i do n't just get in there see there 's too many and just serve em their fuckin food and beat it
he knows you man
he knows all you want is to move up
that 's all
a smooth hitter woulda gone in there seen it was a wash and slipped out
but a guy like you
knowin this is your only chance
waitin eighteen years
no
no man
that 's
that 's
you do n't know what you 're talking about
that 's bullshit
i know these guys
i mean thanks for your concern but that just ai n't the thing of it
do me a favor and roll it around for a bit on your way in
no look
no rolling
nothing needs to be rolled
pack your shit
we got ta get outta here
we got ta get out
what happened
i killed em
oh jesus
i killed em all
what did i fuckin do
in the middle of the lakeview
lakeview the deli
oh shit
i guess we really do n't have a system of deciding who
meee
me
i 'm the guy
i know everyone their habits where they hang out who they talk to
i know where they fuckin live
we could kill everyone
what the fuck are you doing
i i'll tip her
what
what is it
this place is like a scumbag yard sale
oh man
you got ta let me do these guys
i 'm such a moron
i got ta make up for the tit thing
no way
i 've been waitin for this asshole
aw c'mon
i got ta clear my family name here
i 've brought shame to the house of della rocco
you guys got ta teach me that prayer man
that 's some good shit
forget it
it 's a family prayer
my father his father before him that sort of shit
c'mon
who the fuck was he rocco
i know you fuckin know
fuck you
i told you i never saw him before
look again for fuck sake
i know what the fuck he looks like
shit
what
what that guy
you guys
we 're here brother
you got ta keep going
hello
connor is that you
mother is that you
is that worthless brother of your there
i want you both ta hear this
ma what 's wrong
it 's all your fault
both you little bastards
i was a fool to believe you would bring me any peace
the day your da left us when you were almost too young to remember he said the two of you would do me right and make me proud but he was wrong and i got nothin' ta live for
mother what are you sayin
you 're talkin crazy here
i finally found your da 's army revolver connor
what the hell are you doin' with da 's gun
what
what are you doin'
i want ta tell ya one last thing before i pull the trigger
pull the trigger
have ya lost it woman
now just calm down here
no ma
no
blame
how 's uncle sibeal
well you know how it is with him
always complainin he 's never turnin a profit on st. patty 's
whole damn family goes down there with no money cause we know he ca n't bear ta charge us
still bickerin over that huh
come on ma
out with it
who came out first
all right i suppose you have the right ta know
you guys are not under oath here
i am assuming you knew these two guys from before huh
we
met them last night
they had some pretty interesting bandages
know anything about that
so how is it that you guys are fluent in russian
we paid attention in school
know any other languages
well we could try the bag over the head thing
walk you right out the front
our mother can see through bags
well the light caught the side of his face for a second
and it looked like he had a gray beard maybe
late fifties early sixties
so you 're telling me it was one guy with six guns
a and he was a senior fucking citizen
i think it 's better if we find this man before he finds us again
i 'll see what i can do
how do i get in touch with you
we 're going to hit poppa joe tonight right in the comfort of his own home
then we move on to new york
it 's getting a bit hot for us here
be careful
i 'll call you tonight afterwards
we 're alive
an f.b.i. agent came by the bar
he left me his c c he left me his c c he left me this
what are you going to do
we 're going to turn ourselves in
it was self defense
y y yeah that 's what he said
hold this shit for us doc
we 'll be comin back for it when we get out
right
hey murphy
aye
how many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb
how many
two
one ta screw it in and one ta suck my cock
no fuckin hot water man
that
shut it
it 's ma
aaaww shit
evil woman
lord have mercy
that was a good one ma
oh jesus
i gave him his first lesson in sensitivity toward the fairer sex just today
do n't even do it ya bastard
he got beat up by a girl
if that was a girl i want ta see some papers
she had ta be just preoperative for christ sakes
all right love ya ma
listen before ya go just give us the goods eh
yeah
it 's been twenty seven years
what do we tell him about the guns and money
we just got up and left
bum musta rolled them before the police got there
okay
we 're ready
a p penny saved is worth two in the bush
do n't c cross the road if ya ca n't get out of the kitchen
listen fellas y'know he 's got til this week 's end
ya do n't have ta be hard asses do ya
yeah it 's st. patty 's day
everyone 's irish tonight
now why do n't ya pull up a stool and have a drink with us
i have no idea
maybe someone saw and talked
german
not in our neighborhood man
a hundred percent irish
no one talks to cops
period
spanish
then i guess he 's just real
real good
absolutely not
no pictures either
destroy all that which is evil
... so that which is good may flourish
know what we need man
some rope
for what
charlie bronson 's always got rope
what
yeah these guys always got a lot of rope strapped around em in the movies and they always end up using it
oh you 've lost it have n't ya
i 'm serious
me too
that 's stupid
name one thing we 're gon na need it for
i do n't know they just always need it
what is all this they shit
this ai n't a movie
is that right rambo
all right get the stupid fuckin rope
nervous
a bit
me too
see
i told you there 'd be a shaft
just like on tv
where the fuck are you going
we 'll find it
just calm down
no fuck you
this rope is bullshit
i 'm sweatin my ass off draggin this stupid thing around
must weigh 30 pounds
nine bodies
oh you 're good
what were you gon na do
laugh the last three to death funny man
mafiosos getting caught with 20 kilos and walkin on bail the same day
little girls catchin stray bullets in their heads playin hopscotch in their front yards
and everyone thinks the same thing
someone should just go kill those motherfuckers
kill em all
admit it even you 've thought about it
where are you goin'
did you tell him
yes
then what the fuck
who did you kill
holy shit
who
how many
so what do you think
i 'm strangely comfortable with it
we 've teamed up with a sex offender
so when are you getting a plastic fuck doll
give the guy a shot
rocco this is the real deal
we must kill without hesitation without guilt or remorse
evil man dead man
there he goes
okay gentlemen
are we ready to bring this man into the light
are we ready to truly do the work of the lord
a fuckin'-men
now you will receive us
we do not ask for your poor or your hungry
we do not want your tired and sick
it is your corrupt we claim
it is your evil who will be sought by us
with every breath we shall hunt them down
each day we will spill their blood till it rains down from the skies
do not kill do not rape do not steal
these are principles which every man of every faith can embrace
these are not polite suggestions
they are codes of behavior and those that ignore them will pay the dearest cost
there are varying degrees of evil
we urge you lesser forms of filth not to push the bounds and cross over into true corruption
into our domain
for if you do there will come the day when you look behind you and see we three
and on that day you will reap it
and we will send you to whatever god you wish
i prefer to be called rozengurtle by men
okay then
let 's get ya started
okay just cut off as much fat as you can as it goes by and the rule of thumb here is
rule of thumb
yeah
do you know where that term comes from
in the early 1900 's it was legal for men to beat their wives as long as they used a stick no wider than their thumb
i knew you two pricks would give me problems
give me shit cause i 'm a woman
i 'm not gon na take your male dominance bullshit
oh come on now rozengurtle
i was just tryin ta get a rise outta ya
baumgartner sound irish to you fuck face
now look rozengurtle we 're sorry
just relax
holy shit
you 're the first one that 's ever got that
yeah well
i 'm an expert in name- ology
and number three dolly
uh
two shooters
fan fuckin tastic
so what do we do now
that depends
you either do your job or get ethical
maybe the three of them had something in common
no
this guy is big time
these two are street walking scum
and it 's the same story over here
why the crossover
theories
that 's just fucking weird
i have no idea
the shooter knew these guys huh
how do you figure
friends gentlemen
they were friends
no
fuck you
you start getting excited
we got ta fucking go
rocco
what
where 's my cat
i killed your fuckin cat you druggie bitch
you
oh god why
i felt it would bring closure to our relationship
you killed my
my
your what
your fuckin what
my my
your what bitch
i 'll shoot myself in the head you can tell me that cats name
go ahead
your what
your precious little
pee
per
man
peeperman
wrong
what color was it
it was
it was
male or female bitch
so what are you thinkin here
really want to know
so duffy got any theories to go with that
tie
these guys were pros
i think they were coming for one target the fag man he was the
the what man
the fat man
well freud was right
so you think they came for the fag man huh
and what do you base this upon
he was the only one done right
two in the back of the head
and the pennies
new hitman wants to leave his mark
that 's a possibility
y'know you boston cops are perking up
that 's two sound theories in one day neither of which deal with abnormally sized men
another possibility is that they were placed there with religious intent
yeah
some cultures still put pennies in the eyes of the dead or silver
the greeks
the italians
the sicilians
now what is this going to look like to those who do not know what i just told you
it 's gon na look like the bad guys are killing each other
and is there an american shit is there a man seated among us that has n't thought about it many times let 's just put them all on an island give them guns and let them kill each other
this is our wet dream come true
you can expect federal and local law enforcement to go only deep enough to satisfy the law then bury it from here on out
allow me to enlighten you gentlemen to the protocol of the porno industry as i 'm sure you 've never been in one of these places before
a man goes into the booth puts the money in the slot
the dancer gets it on the other side
she hits the button door goes up now there is only glass between you and it 's little fireman time
no way they could have seen it
those doors were down
which means this
they looked down in through the peep hole saw these guys and opened the doors from the inside
pop pop pop right through the glass
why
jesus
i just ca n't think anymore
that scene over at the coffee shop today tapped me out
what
a guy went nuts over off of commonwealth today
shot three guys to death in a coffee shop in broad daylight
fled the scene
do n't have much on him
why was i not informed of this
these two fucking scenes are related
too many coincidences
same day
five hours apart
dead mobsters on both scenes
now why did he kill the bartender
crime of passion
he just went nuts
he would have shot everyone in here
he just ran out of bullets
duffy
this look like a fucking post office to you
this guy came in here with intent
maybe he did n't know exactly what he was gon na do but he had a pretty good idea
the bartender was n't a fucking accident
well we did n't get any help on that
a lot of people saw it
nobody 's talking
fucking figures
look are you guys seeing the pattern here
we got big questions at both of these crime scenes with no answers
why did they kill the guys in the other two booths
why did he do the bartender
it would seem unnecessary even stupid
god i hate cold crime scenes
i 'm fucking leaving now
and do me a favor tell me when the next guy dies cause these guys are not done yet
that 's one big fuckin shoe
and think about it
of all the ways to kill a guy crushin him to death
that 's very particular
you do n't get many of those
i dunno
i feel something big here
i would n't be surprised if we see more of these turning up
brilliant
so now we got a huge guy theory and serial crusher theory
top fucking notch
what 's your name
detective greenly
who the fuck are you
who the
twist of lemon
chief what the fuck is this
sweet n low
he 's struck again has n't he greenly
why do you always disrespect me like that
respect is earned greenly never given
guys like you should have to follow me around squabbling for the scraps from my table
how many bodies greenly
eight
after talking to the dancer we know that their mark was the guy in the middle booth
after she watches them whack him she passes out
why the two extra victims
witness
no way they could have seen it
they were n't related
the guy used a 38
no pennies
totally amateur
who were the victims
a couple of peons for the mob and
oh that 's just beautiful
all the scumbags in the quiet city of boston start dropping dead and you think it 's unrelated
greenly the day i want the boston police doing my thinking for me i will have a fucking tag on my toe
now get me a squad car and get me over there
i want the crime scene photos and any witness statements
now
what if it was just one guy with six guns
why do n't you let me do the thinking huh genius
what the
i got it ta my head now
i got it ta my head now
oh my god
i
oh she 's quite proud of herself
okay seriously both you listen ta me now
it 's only 11:00 here boys so i got lot 's more drinkin ta do with your worthless relatives down at the anvil
just called ta torture us did ya
but he 's been havin' himself a nip or two as well
been up the waitress skirt all night poor girl
well you tell him ta take it easy with that
he 's got ta learn ta respect women the way connor does
this is some heavy shit
this is like lone ranger heavy man
fuck it
there 's so much shit that pisses me off
you guys should recruit 'cause i am sick and fuckin tired of walkin down the street waitin for one of these assholes to get me y'know
hallelujah jaffar
so you 're not just talkin mob guys
you 're talkin anyone right
even like pimps and drug dealers and all that shit
well fuck you guys could do this every day
we 're like 7-eleven
we ai n't always doing business but we 're always open
you fuckin guys
you ruined me
i 'm fuckin done
permanent package boy
who says that
you could take credit on it
what are you serious
yeah fuck it
if you think about it it 's all you can do really
you ca n't tell him it was us
go in braggin and shit
hey
you do n't know that shit for sure
oh jesus
you 're such a fuckin retard
fuck you
use your brain for once
is it so unbelievable they do n't care about you
you are fuckin dead you go in there today
dead
oh yeah
you two fuckin micks know what 's going on huh
fuck you
fuck it
what kind of flowers ya want at your funeral
ya dumb wop
this is the last time i 'll see you
bye bye ya stupid son of a bitch
i 'll be back at 9:00
hello
hey murph
roc
you okay
yeah
anybody call for me
no
you sure you 're okay
i 'm fuckin fine
catch you on the flip side
hello
hey murph
roc
you okay
yeah
anybody call for me
no
you sure you 're okay
i 'm fuckin fine
catch you on the flip side
hurry the fuck up
this is some crazy shit man
those cocksuckers sold me out
vincenzo that fat motherfucker yakavetta 's right hand
he 's the one who set me up
then he went around shooting his mouth off telling everyone i was as good as dead
he goes in there every wednesday night around 10:00 he jerks off in the same booth to the same titty dancer
never misses
so
so let 's kill the motherfucker
i mean what are you guys
like that 's your new thing right
well truth be known those first ones just kinda fell into our laps
well what'ya do
you look like mush mouth from fat albert
fine
fuck it
when we 're done she can i.d. me
i do n't care
just tryin to be professional but no
worst day of my life man
well i 'm sold
well he sure as fuck knew you
fuck you both
ya ask me he was aiming at you
shit
shit
he ai n't here
what the fuck do you mean
i mean he ai n't here
you bet your ass he will
well i 'd say that makes him a lia- fuckin bility
hey
we got ta talk about this early morning church shit
we have to go now
we 're on the lamb
why have you come to a church for council if you 're not religious
why have i come to a church
i never have before
i guess i just
felt i should
what is it my son
it 's ethics
i put evil men behind bars but the law has miles of red tape and loopholes for these
cocksuckers to slip through
i 've found out there are these two young men who fix the situation with an iron fist
as if they have god 's permission
but what they do is wrong and i should arrest them
technically
god 's permission
god does n't
but in this day and age i believe what they do is
necessary
i feel it is
correct
you believe
yes
you feel
yes
you feel
a soul is what gives you feelings
happiness guilt right or wrong
it is a conduit through which the lord speaks to us
you felt that your answers would be here in the house of god today
you feel these men are necessary
the lord has spoken to you twice this day
has he now
you have entered the house of the lord of your own free will speaking of beliefs and feelings
is it so much to believe that god has brought you here
i guess not
it is easy to be sarcastic about religion
it is harder to take small hints from god your feelings and listen to them
to take a stand
you 're right
those who do not act are in a constant state of ethical indecision
i want to stand for what i believe in father
then you must find out what your beliefs are
i believe these young men are right
you know them personally
yes
do you think they would harm an innocent man for any reason
no
they would never do that
the laws of god are higher than the laws of man
yes
yes
i was thinking that too
no
i was feeling it
all i needed was to hear you say it
amen
i 'll help them
forgive me father
thank you father thank you
whatever
goodbye amen
you gon na do what i say got it
yes
i 'm sorry you 're gon na hafta see this
do n't look at me
i 'm sorry i 'm sorry
i did n't see
shut up
shut the fuck up
do n't do this my son
open it
have you no fear of god
that 's who i 'm doing this for now open the fuckin thing
father i 'll do you right here
god have mercy on my soul
poppa joe you want me to go now
yeah
thanks rocco
see ya
hey rocco wait
come back here
yeah boss
i always see you talking to the boys and making them laugh
they always come around telling me what a crack up you are
what is it they call you
the
the funny man
the funny man
well i got a new job for you just for now
roc i 'm having a real shitty day
i 'm depressed
tell me a funny story or a joke
uh
okay
um
you hear the one about the no fuck that one
uh
oh
oh
well
shit
okay there 's a white guy
he 's walkin along the beach and he finds a a pot y'know and ah he rubs it and this genie pops out
but this genie he 's a ni
he 's a black guy
he 's a nigger
yeah
and uh he 's pissed off
he says why you crackers always got ta find my mother fuckin pot
and he tells him he 's gon na grant all his three wishes but he 's gon na give all the black guys
continue the joke
he says what 's your third wish
and the guys says i i want you to beat me half to death
well it 's the funny man
give it here package boy
joey bevo said it was important
said i had to give it to him myself
gimme the fuckin thing
now sit the fuck down
i 'm rocco
i 'm the funny man
heee hee
i 'm so fuckin funny
hee hee
fuck you vincenzo
tell me a joke funny man
hee hee
i caught your show down at the velvet room at the holiday inn loved it when you busted into viva las vegas
what color hair does he have
black hair
paul michael glaser
making hutch david soul
right
the blond guy
ok
that 's wrong
dignan it 's --
plus where 's huggie bear
he 's not there
huggie bear is n't in every single episode
i think you might of dreamed this one anthony
no
it 's a real episode
the killer is leading him across the city by calling different pay phones
why
as part of his plan
i do n't know why
see that 's what i 'm saying
it has the logic of a dream
the point is the killer always goes may i speak to starsky
he says his name
what does starsky say
he says
this is he
this is he
no
this is he
she 's really kind of hot
she 's an attractive older woman
it 's got a v-8 dignan
what do you think the cops have
anthony we 'll get two hundred for the coin collection alone
that 's less than what it 's appraised at
but dignan do you really know that much about rare coins
i know about money anthony
i know the value of money
plus the earrings are worth three times that
the list dignan
i know you remember the list because you signed it
things dignan was not supposed to touch
every valuable item in the house was on that list
that does n't make any difference
i bought those earrings for my mother on her birthday
they have a very special value for her
yeah but i ca n't be sorting through that shit in the middle of a burglary
there 's just not time for it
then you should n't of gone in there dignan
maybe we should of robbed your house
did you ever think of that
where are you going
i do n't appreciate you ridiculing me
how was i ridiculing you
you 're making fun of my family
you know there 's nothing to steal from my mom and craig
you know exactly what you 're saying
that 's not what i meant dignan
did you see that
yeah i saw it
i 'm lookout
dignan it 's got an alarm
i do n't think so
just reach on in
that sets it off
no just do it real quick
i 'll meet you down there
it had an alarm
yeah i heard that
five seven eight dollars
holy shit
what 'd i tell you
eight dollars
that 's not bad
loop around real fast
just turn right here
ok
escape route
the most important thing you can have is an escape route
just in case somebody 's tailing us
or even chasing us as the case may be --
you think we 're going to be chased
that 's a good question
no
i do n't
i 'm just being hypocritical here
however i will say --
now
one thing we need to discuss is timing
timing is absolutely crucial
what are you doing
anthony
nothing
go ahead
anthony give me the fucking gun
no dignan
it 's not your gun
it 's all of ours
dignan calm down
you 're out
i 'm not working with either one of you
dignan
stop
calm down
take a deep breath
you 're right
you 're right
where 's the manager
where 's the other stocker
there 's another stocker right
we know there 's another stocker
is that the manager
unlock that door
check the aisles
i swear to god
in a very quiet voice
like he meant it
yeah
like he would find dignan
one day
like i 'm going to hunt you down and kill you
what 's wrong with him
what do you think
anthony he sat in the car and watched a 4 11 in progress
he got what he deserved
he was the driver dignan
he did what he 's supposed to do
i did n't realize you were so sensitive to bob 's feelings
considering i did the plans you 're actually lucky you got --
do n't even say it man
can i get that credit card from you
i do n't like to use that credit card dignan
why not
because my mom gets the bill
she 's not going to notice anthony
i do n't want to use it
well then cut it in half
i keep it for emergencies
anthony we 're on the run
this is an emergency
it 's only fair that
see if mine are in there
dignan those are n't running shoes
yes they are
look at the treads on those
what about them
they obviously were n't designed for racing
well those treads stink
you 'd blow a knee out racing on those
really
ok dad
but seriously anthony
these are fast shoes
you 've never had a pair of fast shoes in your life dignan
in fifth grade dignan used to wear cowboy boots for p.e.
that 's real cool anthony
yeah i wore boots
my parents would n't buy me any 200 running shoes like yours
i was n't spoiled
do n't call me spoiled dignan
you were spoiled rotten
i 'll just say it
i 'll say it
ok
go ahead
on your marks
get set go
you owe me fifty bucks
bob
look man
she did n't know anything about shirts
no i 'm not saying her
i 'm just saying i do n't know
it 's a great shirt
do n't worry about it
no dignan
i 'm sorry
i ca n't do that
even if it 's the difference between some trooper recognizing us and throwing us in prison or not
i thought you guys went to get your hair cut
no
we did n't
this is inez
carmen
anita
hi
inez this is --
jerry
and this is my associate cornelius
may i have a word with you please
sure
what the fuck is going on here
what
what 's the matter
anthony we 're on the run from the law here
did you tell these people your real name
no
i did n't
dignan they do n't speak english
they do n't
no
not really
inez speaks a little
which one was that
on the left
she 's from cuba
no kidding
he needs to hire an attorney
no no
look
ok
let 's stay here until we find out what 's going on
now that makes sense
we 'll hang out for a couple of days
get a little r&r. make sure future man 's ok and then get back on the road
as long as he gets out ok
obviously
that 's a given
bob
but if it was n't for dignan i probably would of died
yes
it 's true
he 's gone
he stole the car
where was it parked
right here
that coward
son of a bitch
maybe he just went to the store
he took his stuff
he 's gone
i should of seen this
i should of expected it
bob does n't have any character
he went back for his brother
we said 48 hours
that 's a long time to be in jail
when 'd he tell you
this morning
where was i
you were asleep
he told you and you let him do it
he told me because he wanted to know if i wanted to go
if you wanted to go
what were you going to do
just leave me here by myself
well i did n't do it did i
so when you were saying bob 's at the store and acting real surprised that was just an act
you were just --
bob went to help his brother
i understand that and i ca n't help it if you do n't
i understand that if i had a few more friends like you and bob i 'd be dead
if you say so
if you 'd gone with bob you 'd probably be in weatherford by now
of course i 'd be here frantically worrying thinking you must of got kidnapped
i did n't realize you had such an incredible ability to feel sorry for yourself dignan
well the world is a little bit colder today
we 're going over to this bar if you feel like going
no
i 'm going to swim
i 'll see you later
why do n't you come with us
ok
man
i 'm sorry
we just went for a walk --
i do n't really feel like talking about it
the only thing i feel like is getting the fuck out of this place
we need a car
i have an idea for that
what
inez has a master key to all these rooms does n't she
does n't she
i do n't think we can do that
i know we can
it 's real simple
we go into a room grab some car keys and --
what i 'm saying is she would n't go for that
she does n't need to know
i do n't know dignan
i just --
look
i 'm ready to get the fuck out of here
it 's real torture for me to be here
getting the shit kicked out of me by mexicans
shh
no one to back me up
now i have a good idea
so unless you come up with something better --
dignan
i ca n't do that
all right
i just ca n't
i do n't think we need any keys dignan
i think i can hotwire a car for us
you do n't know how to hotwire
yes i do
bob taught me
bob taught you how to get electrocuted
no i 'm serious
he made me a diagram
i think we better go home
do n't panic anthony
i 'm not
but there 's --
you ca n't just run home every time things get tough
first of all we 've got enough dough to --
our money situation is not good
you 're so spoiled
what is not good to you
only a few hundred --
we 've got sixteen dollars
that 's not correct
sixteen dollars
i know
where 's the rest
i had to give some to inez
how much
383
you gave 383 to the goddamn housekeeper
what the fuck is your problem
she needed it
a 500 tip
for the housekeeper
her name 's inez
stop calling her the housekeeper
that 's what she is
i know that
but --
you 're in love with the fucking housekeeper
shut up
what are you going to do get married
have a bunch of little idiot janitor brats
and go around scrubbing the --
when 'd you get back
ah
couple days ago
i want you to look at this
what is it
it 's big anthony
real big
it 's called hinckley cold storage
what 's hinckley cold storage
mr. henry has an inside source
we call him steve
that 's where we get our information
who 's mr. henry
you 'll meet him this afternoon
he 's helping us set it up
what exactly is this place
freezers
right
freezers
imported foods
what time did he say to be here
right now
you could give somebody a concussion
let me feel that
what do you think
he seems pretty good
dignan
take it easy
bob
he does n't want to fight
get out of the way
no dignan
this is n't --
ok
man in blue jeans just left by southwest door
he is entering a white van
what time is it
eleven fifteen
ok
mark that down
i did
god
is n't this great
working on the job
got a wheel man
got a safecracker
good friends with mr. henry
yeah
it 's pretty good
it 's like we 've finally arrived
next week we 'll be drinking pia coladas
hopefully this trip'll go a little smoother than the last one
or i might end up with a broken nose
did that hurt
i 'll try not to hold you back tomorrow
i do n't think you will
i do n't want to be too much of a liability
look you 're going to do fine
it 's ok to be scared
i do n't think i ever said this to you
but it meant a lot to me the way you were after that swifty stuff happened
he was a nice guy
he was all right
do you like inez
as a person
yeah
as a girl
yes
i do
so do i.
bird dog to scarecrow
bird dog to scarecrow
go ahead bird dog
you 're all clear
roger
we all set
hang on a second
i do n't know
check the fucking elevator
it 's moving
what 's happening
what 's going on
it was bob
his walkie talkie 's busted
who did that
what the fuck is that
it 's going back down
applejack
what 's happening
freeze
nobody move
get against the wall
help me move him
careful
check his pulse
who tripped the alarm
it 's the fire alarm
somebody pulled the fire alarm
where 's kumar
i do n't know
jesus christ anthony
did you lose him
what are you doing
let 's go
come on
wait for kumar
come on kumar
dignan it 's too late
i do n't think so
like amnesia
ca n't remember shit
crs
so is mr. henry going to come by and see me or anything
i do n't think so
i mean
actually he robbed bob 's house
he did
yeah
you got to be kidding me
i 'm not kidding
what 'd he get
pretty much everything
the grandfather clock
you think applejack knew
we have n't heard from applejack since he got out of the hospital
his case got dismissed
why
we 're not sure
mr. henry never gave you a test did he
what do you mean
nothing
you 're living on a sailboat
it belongs to bob 's uncle
how big is it
oh i 'd say about --
where
behind bob 's house
what 's he in for
he stole a tractor
i think i may have found a way out of here
you 're kidding
no
i 'm not
how
shhh
wait for my instructions
dignan i --
when we go through the next gate you 'll have 30 seconds to take out the tower guard
what
have the car running at the north- west checkpoint
bob and i 'll --
dignan i --
scale the barricade and tunnel through no man 's land
and bob
remember
scale the --
shield me from the bullets
they wo n't shoot civilians
ready
this is my business manager rowboat
nice to meet you
that 's a sharp jacket
thanks
it 's hard to get much spin with this kind of paddle
it 's called a racquet anthony and you 're holding it wrong
that 's ghetto play
hold it like this
you know your form is for shit but you 've got a hell of a talent
thanks
every once in a while some cat comes to me
he wants to know how i made it
how did i become a success
the first thing i tell them is follow your instincts
let your instincts guide you
the second thing i tell them is for christ 's sake you got to know your grammar
grammar
you mean a safecracker
yeah
and i 'll tell you who we 're going to want kumar banijamali
look at that woman
she 's what
fifty
fifty five
but she has n't let herself go
i appreciate an older woman who has a commitment to her body
so do i.
tell me something
what the hell kind of name is dignan
i 'm not really sure
i think it 's irish
or maybe --
i guess what i 'm trying to say is what the hell kind of person is this dignan
what do you mean what kind of person
he 's a good person
sure sure
he 's a great person and i 'd call bullshit on anybody who said differently
but i wonder if the kid has the goods up here
i do n't think you 're giving him enough credit
i know sometimes he does n't think an idea through
he gets too excited
but --
as far as i can tell he has n't thought his life through
he 'd be fine cutting my grass or parking my car
but business
you i can work with
you i could groom
dignan 's not going to make it
and you 're wrong if you think i 'd turn my back on a friend
hold it
congratulations
you passed the test
what do you mean
the abe henry double cross test
you just made a perfect score
that was a test
take a deep breath
how does that feel
it feels good
did dignan take the test
yes he did
how 'd he do
this is good
i want to ask a favor boys
one day when i 'm long gone and all but forgotten make one last toast to abe henry
and remember me as a friend
but you 're thieves
it 's what you are
yeah
it 's an esoteric journey
we 're renegades from despair
can i ask you something mr. henry
absolutely
why 'd you want to help us
because i was like you once
and there was no one there to help me
future man
who
future man
you know
cause he looks like he 's from the future
did you ever steal a car before
yeah
i 've stolen two cars before
one jaguar
and one trans am
with t- tops
that trans am was fun to drive
what do herbs have to do with it
i do n't understand the --
pot is an herb
it 's just like any type of gardening
in your backyard
how do you protect them
it 's private property
plus i have hector
hector woudn't do anything
but he 's got a loud bark
that 's the most important thing is a loud bark
could you grow cinnamon
i do n't know
sure i guess
you could make your own cinnamon toast
see you
see you bob
you 'll probably have them the rest of your life
what was that
what the fuck is dignan doing with that cop
he loves them
there 's a million places to hide around here
oh yeah
they 'll never catch the guy
i hope not
phil probably provoked him
where 's he going
where you going
move
why do n't you just tell them the truth
those belong to my neighbor phil
i do n't know
i personally do n't need that shit in my life right now
nobody does
will you guys shut up
god
it 's like having two little kids in the car
ok dad
you think he got my license plates
he looked too shaken up
how long are they going to hold him
i do n't know
i do n't know anything
except phil says they got him
and he 's in jail
bob where you going
i 'm not playing any more golf
why not
cause i 'm not getting any better
it 's a waste of time
you 've only been playing for two weeks bob
it takes a long time to learn this game
you think i 'm improving
yes
you just got to stick with it
you do n't have to talk about it if you do n't want to
no i do n't mind
i know it must of been a bad experience
but it does n't sound like it was your fault
well i did n't mean to electrocute him
but the whole operation was my idea
it took six months of research
i did all the wiring myself
switched ac to dc
doubled the voltage
shorted out the generator
the whole school was shut down
that 's pretty complicated for a senior prank
i do n't like that word prank bob
i was trying to do something more than a prank
at first they were going to charge me with manslaughter
that 's partly why i was in custody so long
sixty days
sixty days
yeah
one minute you 're studying great expectations and the next minute you 're drawing the holy mary for some kid who tried to stab his girlfriend
why were you drawing the holy mary
prison tatoos
i got to be pretty good
it 's not like drawing on paper
i thought he did n't have to pay anything because of the technicality
yeah but he still has the aggravation
three days sitting in a cell
were you adopted bob
why do you say that
well because you guys do n't look alike
no
i was n't adopted
was future man adopted
jesus christ
no
let 's not even talk about it
it was stupid
yeah
let 's keep it --
cause you would of let my brother rot in jail
no i know
i 'm just saying
i feel fine
you want a piece of cake
sure
what are you doing
my walkie talkie 's busted
i ca n't tell what 's going on
let me see it
did you drop it
no
jesus bob
i did n't do anything
yeah
who 's got the car keys
we think mr. henry maybe --
his health is n't very good you know
they take that into account
it 's in the driveway
temporarily
how do you say nineteen
dies y nueve
right
yeah
yo soy dies y nueve
how old are you
are you ever scared of finding a dead body in one of these rooms
no
it could happen
this is the exact kind of place where it happens
but i do n't want to scare you
what
what
like silk
god
that does sound corny
oh your skin feels so soft and silky
but it really kind of does
nice to meet you applejack
you 're anthony
yeah
i hear you 're a good thief
did you ever hear of the s. cooper trust robbery
uh uh
s. cooper trust in san francisco
uh uh
let 's go abdul shabazz
abdul shabazz
i can knock a man out with a six inch punch
what do you mean
feel this
where 'd they come from
the front stairs
where were you
there 's a lot of valuable shit in there applejack
the silver and the china
the crystal
and the grandfather clock
goddammit i bet that clock 's worth ten grand
why the fuck do we need to blow up the car
it does n't make any goddamn sense
just settling an old score
you might say revenge
that sounds like a lot of bullshit that 'll land us in jail
we might have to take that chance
cause i feel pretty strongly about this
is that buckethead
is that him
wait a second
mr. henry pulled that job in 1965
it 's famous
applejack was the wheel man
did you use this same car applejack
hell no
this is a 72
i was driving a 63 pontiac
i do n't know why the fuck we 're having a party
the damn job 's not over yet
well this is n't really a party per se
you do n't celebrate til it 's over
true
what
bob
get back in position
are you a fag
you 're the faggot
dignan and anthony this is little richard
he 's crazy
totally nuts
i do n't know about that
little richard
trust me
you 're insane
jesus this guy used to carry a percussion bomb around in his trunk
you do not want a guy like that loose on the streets
it seemed like a good idea at the time
the one and only little richard
well what do you think
i do n't know bob
what about one of those
i 'm not allowed to drive those
not even for emergencies
no
i thought your parents were in italy
they are
so who 's going to know
my brother
he looks like he was designed by scientists
for desert warfare
that never would of --
let 's cut the bullshit
how much could you grow
realistically
as much as i want
when these plants bud i 'll probably have about six thousand dollars worth of weed
six thousand dollars
come on bob
you should take a look
i have an entire crop in my backyard
if it 's that easy why does n't everybody grow them
good question
do n't you guys tell anybody about my plants
you 're paranoid bob
yeah but do n't tell anybody
what was that all about
i ca n't believe you said that
what did i say
i told you he 's crazy
the guy is fucking insane
i warned you dignan
you said it like it was a big joke bob
like he 's wild
no i was saying crazy like a lunatic
i know that now
he 's a fucking psycho
well do n't blame me
i told you
i do blame you bob
and woah
look at her
where 'd she go
maybe she turned
i think we might of scared her
let 's just go
i 'm going to take a look at this
hang on
this is important bob
anthony and i are responsible for the internal situation
the money and the people
you 're responsible for the external situation
the streets and the getaway
that 's my responsibility
that 's your domain
ok
he does n't get it
held never understand what we 're trying to accomplish here
it 's too dangerous for him
well in reality it 's not that dangerous bob
it 's only dangerous if you do n't know what you 're doing
yeah but what if some nut pulled gun on you
you know bob anthony did kill someone
he electrocuted our janitor senior year
he electrocuted someone
it was an accidental
i do n't want to go into the details
it was just one of those senior pranks that did n't really go right
i mean obviously since swifty 's dead
that 's why anthony never graduated
his name was swifty
yeah
one of the nicest old guys you 'd ever know
that 's too bad
you know when somebody gets electrocuted their skin starts smoking
at least swifty 's did
what are you doing
i 'm putting a piece of tape on my nose
what happened
shhh
slow down bob
drive natural
this is natural
that 's good
keep it at forty
did we get it
be cool bob
be cool
make that light
how much is there
do n't count it
was dignan screaming like get me a bag
no
i was calm
you really think he 'll remember you
no
all he 'll remember is a guy with a piece of tape on his nose
bob will you please listen
i do n't want to talk about it
in all probability nothing would of happened
but why take the chance
that 's why i ran
i mean how many plants were even back there
five
ten
there were more than that
shit bob
what the fuck did you do that for
he would n't move
is he chasing us
i do n't know
i 'm sure he did
we 'll have to get new plates
it 's registered in my mother 's name
what the fuck possessed you
you 're the one who kept saying ram him
bob
are you coming
see you in a little while
you can go first bob
my brother 's in jail
what are you talking about
the weed
but it 's not his
how can they arrest future man
they said he 's a drug dealer
i do n't think they can make it stick bob
i mean what do they actually have on future man
well the marijuana crop is a good start
that could be anybody 's
they also found my two beam scale in the garage
since when is it a crime to have a scale in your house
everybody has a scale
the cops say it 's a special kind of scale drug dealers use in selling marijuana
so tell them the truth
what do you use it for
i was just going to use it to see how much i had
give me the keys dignan
i ca n't do that bob
dignan
you 're going to give me those keys or you 're going to get hurt
do n't threaten me bob
goddammit dignan
it 's my car
if you do n't give me my keys i swear to god --
future man would never go to jail for you i 'll tell you that
his name 's not future man dignan
i know it 's not
you do n't even know his name
yes i do
what is it
just get in the car bob
what 's his name
ok bob
i do n't know his name
you know why
because i do n't care
he 's future man
but i care about you
and to me it does n't make sense to go back to the scene of a crime
will you get in the car bob
this is stupid
it 's not your decision and he 's not your brother dignan
that 's right
i only have one vote
we 'll go talk with anthony and figure it out
you 've got a beautiful walk bob
let 's go
dignan
anthony
bad news
hey dignan
how 's it going
not bad
come on in
what you been up to
not a whole lot bob
it 's too bad about what happened on the road
yeah
it is
right
it was extremely stupid
i do n't expect an apology and i do n't even want one
i just want us to --
i ca n't fucking believe this guy
an apology bob
man i do n't want to go into this
it was n't your fault bob
you had your brother
i did n't have any choice
i 'm sorry bob
that 's ok
that 's ok
look
we want you on the job
come on bob
i know it man
hang on
jesus christ
scarecrow
yeah
everything ok
yeah
we 're in the elevator
how 's it look back there
it looks pretty good
there 's nobody back here
stand by
bird dog
i could n't hear anything
who 's watching the door
what the fuck are you doing
get back in position
what 's wrong with applejack
he 's having a heart attack or something
let 's go
the elevator broke
where 's applejack
he 's stuck between two floors
applejack drove
run
run
let 's go
i said to the da that cop who hit me must of given me crs disease
what 's that
that 's just what the da asked
crs is a disease where you ca n't remember shit
do you have your own room
we do n't have rooms bob
we have cells
do you have your own cell
no
i have a cellmate
his name 's carl
do they let you --
i do n't really want to talk about it bob
hold on --
here we go
wait a second --
now
how 's that 700 bucks coming
i 'm working on it
hard to find it sitting by the pool drinking beer and bullshitting
fancy seeing you here bob
yeah
hey clay
you keeping out of trouble
i 'm trying
this boy 's a troublemaker
he used to tear this place apart
your brother was up here the other day
he said you ran away from home
he said what
he said you ran away from home
no
i did n't run away
i went out of town
how long do you have to go
26 weeks
and what does that cover
social issues
crime prevention
hand to hand combat
ground defense
did you hear that
dignan
good to see you
good to see you applejack
who are you
this is anthony adams mr. henry
this is no good
is he in
i do n't know
are you in anthony
what do you mean grammar
the basic grammatical rules of robbing
the grammar
crowd control
crowd control
wake up guys
oh yeah
you 're going to need a boxman for this one
but that can be arranged
you got to have fun with it
there 's no point if you 're not having any fun
would you like me to be there tomorrow
yes
why
well i think --
no if i go out on this job then it 's just another score by mr. henry
and i do n't see it like that
this is your job
your creation
i want you to try this
where did he go
who
applejack
why did he go that way
he 's going to watch the back stairwell remember
do n't worry about it
what 's the story
ca n't get it
it wo n't
what can we do
we 're closed sir
where 's that guy going
he left his sweater
well i left some money in there
where
in the cash register
step away from the door
where is he
where is rob
i do n't know
maybe in literature
that 's his section
you got that
hello my friend
you in the army yes
no
i just have short hair
is that your chiquita
no my friend knows her
she chicano yes
you like chicanos
sure
you a good pool player
got a little lucky
where 's your friend
he go with the chiquita
no
just pool
you hoto
fuck you
you a hoto
no
me no hoto
tecate
right
how 's the weather down there
mr. henry
come on in
it 's locked
no it 's not
john mapplethorpe
how are you
hi
good to know you john
the world needs dreamers son
what
the world needs dreamers
to relieve the pain of consciousness
well we 'll see you later bob
pleasure to meet you john
nice to meet you
you told me bourne was dead
there was a mistake
i 'll say
you killed his goddam girlfriend instead
now they 're onto neski
they 're at the brecker hotel even as we speak
will it track back to us
no
the files are spotless
whatever they find it 's just going to make conklin look worse
and the landy woman
she 's done everything i wanted
she bit on conklin so fast it was laughable
she even found his bogus swiss account
anything else
neski was a roadblock
without me there 's no company no fortune
you owe me uri
one last push
one last push
one
leaving was a business decision
we 're both rich come enjoy it
what do you mean
go to the airport
get a plane
i 'll have a brass band waiting for you
save it for bourne
what
and what are we looking for
i want to know about treadstone
to know about it
it was a kill squad
black on black
closed down two years ago
nobody wants to know about treadstone
not around here
you better take this back to marty and make sure he knows what you 're doing
he does
i 've been down to the archives
i have the files ward
let 's talk about conklin
what are you after pam
you want to fry me
you want my desk
is that it
i want to know what happened
what happened
jason bourne happened
you 've got the files
then let 's cut the crap
it went wrong
conklin had these guys wound so tight they were bound to snap
bourne was his number one -- guy went out to work screwed the op and never came back
conklin could n't fix it could n't find bourne could n't adjust
it all went sideways
finally there were no options left
so you had conklin killed
i mean if we 're cutting the crap
i 've given thirty years and two marriages to this agency
i 've shoveled shit on four continents
i 'm due to retire next year and believe me i need my pension but if you think i 'm gon na sit here and let you dangle me with this you can go to hell
marshall too
it had to be done
and bourne
where 's he now
dead in a ditch
drunk in a bar in mogadishu
who knows
i think i do
we had a deal going down in berlin last week
during the buy both our field agent and the seller were killed
we pulled a fingerprint from a timing charge that did n't go off
they were killed by jason bourne
... ivan mevedev -- senior financial manager -- worked for one of the new russian petroleum companies pecos oil
he claimed to know where the money landed
we believe this could have only happened with help from someone inside the agency
this
... this is conklin 's computer
... at the time of his death conklin was sitting on a personal account in the amount of seven hundred and sixty thousand dollars
do you know what his budget was
excuse me
we were throwing money at him
throwing it at him and asking him to keep it dark
may i finish
conklin might 've been a nut but he was n't a mole
you have me his calendar for a couple of days i 'll prove he killed lincoln
this is supposed to be definitive
what 's definitive is that i just lost two people in berlin
so what 's your theory
conklin 's reaching out from the grave to protect his good name
the man is dead
berlin
i 've already got a team there
i doubt bourne 's in naples to settle down and raise a family
you do n't know what you 're getting into here
and you do
from the moment he left treadstone he has killed and eluded every person that you sent to find him
call a mayday into berlin station
we need snipers dod whatever they got
snipers
hold on -- he said he wants to come in
my ass he does
you 're playing with fire pamela
marshall said nail him to the wall
i do n't know how you interpreted that but i do n't think he meant repatriate him
do n't you want answers
there are no answers
there 's either jason bourne alive or jason bourne dead
and i for one would prefer the latter
and what about her
you just send her out to this lunatic with no protection
so what 's he doing
you believe him
it 's hard to swallow
the confusion -- the amnesia -- but he keeps on killing
it 's more calculated than sick
what about nicky
she 's the last one to see bourne in paris
she 's the one he asks for
they disappear
well whatever he 's doing i 've had enough -- this is now a search and destroy mission
i want the berlin police fully briefed and -- -- get this out to all the agencies
sorry to wake you
i was n't sleeping
you ok
what
they found danny zorn 's body
dead in the basement at the building where my people got hit the first time
oh god
it must have been bourne
did he say anything to you
no
it must have been bourne
sir
thanks
she say what time i should call
the sooner the better
i did my box work but i wanted to show you before i showed landy
i came out here last night because none of this was making any sense
i mean i 'm with you on this conklin was a nut but a traitor
i just ca n't get there
what do you have danny
you put a four gam kel on here and it 's gon na take out power to the building
you know that
what you ca n't know is if it 's gon na blow the room with it
and
there were two charges they were supposed to go off simultaneously
the second one the one that did n't go off was down here
first of all this is nothing it 's a sub line for the breaker above
second why put the charge all the way down here
if you 're good enough to get in here and handle the gear you 're good enough to know you do n't need this
bourne would know
it was staged
is it a slam dunk
no but
jesus
okay
what if someone decided to cover their tracks by blaming conklin and bourne
what if bourne did n't have anything to do with this
keep going
something 's been going on here in europe
and it 's still going on
post conklin
who 's been in berlin
lots of people
including landy
she had access to the archives
who else knows about this
nobody
you
i had to tell you right
show me again
okay
sit
can you
the chair
have the chair
i speak english
of all the people in the world you 're the only one i have anything to offer
that 's why i came here
okay
it 's nice
does this picture mean anything to you
hmm
it 's nothing
it 's just a picture
no
it 's because you do n't know how they died
no i do
i would want to know
i would want to know that my mother did n't kill my father
i would want to know that she did n't kill herself
what
they loved you
and i killed them
how
how can
how can you be here and say this
i do n't want you to forgive me
it does n't matter
your life is hard enough
you 're a liar
you know i 'm not
you're a liar
look at me
i should kill you
if it 's true you should die
i should kill you now
i ca n't let you do that either
because you 're afraid
no
because you do n't want to know how it feels
i have to go now
is this really happening
i 'm sorry
i emptied it
felt a little light
drop it
front
use your teeth
sorry
old habits
you still should 've moved
i like it here
last time i saw you was greece
you had a good spot
so why did n't you kill me then
she would n't let me
she 's the only reason you 're alive
you 're lying
if it 's over why are they after me
i do n't know
who sent you to greece
a voice
a voice from the states
someone new
pamela landy
i do n't know who that is
what 's going on in berlin
i do n't know
why would i lie
she really did that
told you not to kill me
i had a woman once
but after a while what do you talk about
i mean for us
the work
you ca n't tell them who you are
i did
you called it in
i 'm sorry
how long
how long do i have --
-- car keys
-- my coat -- but we should --
-- what
--
-- take the back -- get another car --
where were you jason
in the car
conklin up front
i 'll get the book
no
there 's nothing new
you 're sure
we should still -- we should write it down
two years we 're scribbling in a notebook --
-- it has n't been two years --
-- it 's always bad and it 's never anything but bits and pieces anyway
you ever think that maybe it 's just making it worse
you do n't wonder that
we write them down because sooner or later you 're going to remember something good
i do remember something good
all the time
i remember you
i 'm trying marie okay
i worry when you get like this
it 's just a nightmare
i do n't mean that
i worry when you try to ignore it
sleep
sleep now
i should be better by now
you are better
and i think it 's not memories at all
it 's just a dream you keep having over and over
but it ends up the same
one day it will be different
it just takes time
we 'll make new memories
you and me
that 's crazy
no
not this
this is real
and he 's right there
where --
back there -- at the corner -- hyundai -- silver --
... but you 're not -- you 're not sure
we ca n't wait to be sure
i do n't want to move again
i like it here
look we clear out we get to the shack we get safe
we hang there awhile
i 'll come back
i 'll check it out
but right now we ca n't --
-- where 's left to go
--
-- there 's places -- we ca n't afford to be wrong
you drive
what
switch
you drive
-- where
-- make the left -- toward the bridge --
jesus
-- -- is he back there
--
-- not yet --
-- it 's just him
--
-- yeah -- one guy -- i do n't think he was ready --
-- hang on --
you keep going to the shack
i 'll meet you there in an hour
where are you going
i 'm going to bail on the other side and wait
this bridge is the only way he can follow
what if it 's not who you think it is
if he crosses the bridge it is
there must be another way
i warned them marie
i told them to leave us alone
jason please do n't do this
it wo n't ever be over like this
there 's no choice
i love you too
tell me later
i wanted to kill him
but you found another choice
i did
it would n't have changed the way you feel
it might have
i know it 's a dream
you do
i only dream about people who are dead
i did
jason i swear i did
i told them
i told them i believed you
who is pamela landy
you hear me
i believed you
is she running treadstone
why is she trying to kill me
they know
they know you were here
they know you killed these two guys
they know you and conklin had something on the side
they do n't know what it is but they know
how do they know that
how can they know any of that
what is this a game
i want to hear it from you
say it
last week an agency field officer went to make a buy from a russian national
a russian
it was pamela landy 's op
the guy was going to sell out a mole or something
i have n't been debriefed on exactly what it was
last week
when
and you got to him before we could
i killed him
you left a print
there was kel that did n't go off
there was a partial print they tracked it back to treadstone
they know it 's you
i left a fingerprint
you fucking people
what was landy buying
what kind of files
what was she buying
conklin
stuff on conklin
why are you here then
please -- i 'm only here because of paris -- because they ca n't figure out what you 're doing -- i 'm here because of abbott --
abbott
he closed down treadstone -- he took care of me after paris
so when was i here
what do you mean
for treadstone
in berlin
you know my file
i did a job here
when
no
you never worked berlin
my first job
your first assignment was geneva
that 's a lie
you never worked berlin
no
jason
please
i was here
... it 's not in the file
i swear
i know your file
your first job was geneva
i swear to god you never worked here
okay how do you want to do it
i want someone i know to take me in
who
there was a girl in paris
part of the program
she used to handle the medication
okay jason your move
alexanderplatz
30 minutes
under the world clock
alone
give her your phone
where am i
ramstein air base germany
before the wall fell you would have woken up in a russian prison hospital
oh shit
careful
why am i alive
are you disappointed
thank you for your gift
i 'm sorry about marie
what 's that
do you think you can read
are you well enough
do n't need it
i remember everything
sounds like a threat
you did n't answer my question
why you 're alive
you 're alive because you 're special
because she kept you alive
because we want you back on our side
we need to get in there
i 'm working on it
-- kurt 's reopening all the wyfi and sat links --
-- uplink all relevant files to kim -- -- and i want them to contact anyone who had anything to do with treadstone --
-- go -- take the van
--
-- the hotel -- how far
--
maybe he just needed a place to spend the night
i want to look at the room
check it out
alright
take it down
what
this stays between you and i. we finally have an edge
i do n't want to lose it
we 'll know for sure when we get the security tapes
but we can relax
we tracked him
he 's on a train to moscow
you 're sure
what
the tapes
hold on
yep
and abbott just direct dialed moscow from his room
show me
here
now
show now
this is everything
is there
is there
is all there
okay cut to the chase pam
what are you selling
i think that bourne and conklin were in business
that bourne is still involved
and that whatever information i was going to buy in berlin it was big enough to make bourne come out from wherever he 's been hiding to kill again
how 's that scan
mr. nevins
who 's this
pamela landy again
where do we stand
how long have you worked for the agency
me
four years
if you ever want to make it to five you 're gon na listen to me real close
jason bourne is armed and extremely dangerous
a week ago he assassinated two men in berlin one of whom was a highly experienced field officer
i want that area secured i want any evidence secured and i want it done now
is that clear
yes sir -- ma'am
i 'm getting on a plane to berlin in 45 minutes which means you are going to call me back in 30 and when i ask you where we stand i had better be impressed
my mobile number is
what kind of problems
depression
anger
compulsive behaviors
they had physical symptoms -- headaches -- sensitivity to light --
amnesia
before this
before bourne
no
good luck
you were his local contact
you were with him the night conklin died
you 're coming with us
i 'm curious about bourne
your interpretation of his condition
you have specific training in the identification and diagnosis of psychological conditions
am i a doctor no but
are you an expert in amnesia
look what do you want me to say
i was there
i believed him
believed what
i believed jason bourne had suffered a severe traumatic breakdown
so he fooled you
if you say so
not good enough
you 're the person who floated this amnesia story
ever feel sorry for him
for what he 'd been through
you 're making it out like we 're friends here or something
i met him alone twice
you felt nothing
no spark
two young people in paris
dangerous missions
life and death
you mean did i want a date
did you
these were killers
conklin had them all jacked up
they were dobermans
some women like dobermans --
what do you want from me
i was reassigned
i 'm out
see that 's a problem for me nicky
whatever he 's doing we need to end it
this is n't the kind of mess you walk away from
i do n't think we need to keep looking for him anyway
and why is that
because he 's doing just what he said he 'd do
he 's coming for us
let 's give him half an hour
so
felt promising
it 's a start
do we know what this says
yup
the main word there the file heading translates as treadstone
what the hell is a treadstone
anything
no
munich 's a bust
he 's loose
are we locked up
black coat possibly leather
dark slacks
dark t shirt
he says they 're gon na try and corral the guests on the street over there and then check them out but
yeah that 'll work
what the hell was he doing here
here 's what i 've got
remember vladimir neski
russian politician
seven years ago he was due to speak to a group of european oil ministers here at the hotel
he never did
he was murdered
by who
his wife
in room 645
then she shot herself
alright
i want you kurt and kim to stay on bourne track everything that 's out there
we 're looking at all berlin outbound
good news is every train station in berlin has thirty to forty fixed digital security cameras
common feed
are we hacking or asking
yes
in that order
and what about you anything
someone dead from this household
we just had a funeral is n't that what it means in england as well
what it means in england -- and in scotland too -- is that rebels have forfeited their lands
we were ambushed last night
but the scots dragged their dead away
my brother and nephew perished two days ago when their hay cart turned over
then we 'll just have a peek at the wounds
dig 'em up
they 've been sanctified and buried in the holy rites of god 's church and any hand that disturbs them now takes on eternal damnation
so please -- do it
we 'll sleep here tonight
you 'll come home with me
we 'll let the house and the lands too plenty of willing neighbors
i do n't want to leave
did n't want your father to die either did ya
but it happened
but
what will you do
i will invade england
and defeat the english on their own ground
invade
that 's impossible it --
a thousand
you have made me guardian of scotland
so i tell you this is what we face
we must sue for peace
peace
we can not defeat this --
with cavalry -- not heavy like the english but light fast horsemen like you nobles employ -- we could outmaneuver their bowmen
it is suicide
sir william
we come to seek a meeting
you 've all sworn to longshanks
an oath to a liar is no oath at all
an oath to a patriot is a vow indeed
every man of us is ready to swear loyalty to you
so let the council swear publicly
we can not
some scarcely believe you are alive
other think you 'll pay them mornay 's wages
we bid you to edinburgh
meet us at the city gates two days from now at sunset
pledge us your pardon and we will unite behind you
scotland will be one
i will meet you but only one way -- if robert the bruce is there and puts his hand on my bible and swears his loyalty to scotland
he has already agreed to come
young robert we are honored --
my father hears that longshanks has granted prima noctes
clearly meant to draw more of his supporters here
a wise plan
and how is your father
we have missed him at the council
he strained his leg so that it pains him to ride
but he sends his greetings -- and says that i speak for all the bruces
and for scotland
does anyone know his politics
no
but his weight with the commoners could unbalance everything
the balliols will kiss his ass so we must
may he rest in peace
you have already sealed the coffin
he was a modest man
it will not be long before longshanks too is encased in stone and his crowns divided for others to wear
longshanks promised
you are surprised he would lie
balliol was murdered in a church yesterday
you are longshanks new designate
you will be king
scottish rebels have routed lord bottoms
i hear
this wallace is a bandit nothing more
what news of the north
nothing new majesty
we have sent riders to speed any word
while i am in france fighting to expand your future kingdom i learn that stirling castle is lost our entire northern army wiped out
and you have done nothing
i have ordered conscriptions
wallace has sacked york
impossible
how dare you bring a panicky lie
the weapon has been outlawed by the pope himself
so the scots will have none of them will they
my armorers have already made a thousand
now we kill two birds at one stroke
we recruit from scotland for our armies in france
the scots will fight for us
what choice do they have
now they must serve us or starve
but if we have not caught wallace --
he is gone
finished
dead
if he has not yet bled to death or had his throat cut for him he will not survive the winter
it is very cold -- is it not our flower
his legend grows
it will be worse than before
you let wallace escape your whole army
you can not blame me for this
what is it
you directed me to report to you the moment the king 's conference was ended
so i did
and what was so important about it
scotland
he intends --
now my flower do you understand
yes
i had thought that
i was loathsome to you
perhaps i am
if i may be excused m'lord
you may
good day to you m'lords
you mock us with a smile
i am cheerful with a plan to soothe your miseries
all of england shudders with the news of renewed rebellion
wallace 's followers
wallace himself
if you wish to pretend a ghost rallies new volunteers in every scottish town i leave you to your hauntings
if you wish to take him i know a way
the little cow is insane --
grant as you do everything else with treachery
offer him a truce to discuss terms and send me to my castle at locharmbie as your emissary
he trusts me
pick thirty of your finest assassins for me to take along
and i will set the meeting and the ambush
is it true
wallace is captured
simply because he eluded your trap do you think he is more than a man
my father is dying
perhaps you should think of our coronation
when will his trial be
wallace 's
for treason there is no trial
tomorrow he will be charged then executed
i have come to beg for the life of william wallace
you fancy him
i respect him
at worst he was a worthy enemy
show mercy
oh thou great king
and win the respect of your own people
nor you
to you that word is as unfamiliar as love
before he lost his powers of speech he told me his one comfort was that he would live to know wallace was dead
i 'll wait
back there
hamish i
thank
we make spears
a hundred spears
fourteen feet long
fourteen
--
thanks for the food and drink
and for bringing 'em yourselves
we 're here to stay
we do n't care to live if we ca n't fight beside ya
rest william
i rest
your rest is making me exhausted
you know it 's a trap
probably
but we ca n't win alone
we know that
this is the only way
i do n't want to be a martyr
nor i
i want to live
i want a home and children and peace
i 've asked god for those things
but he 's brought me this sword
and if he wills that i must lay it down to have what he wants for my country then i 'll do that too
that 's just a dream william
we 've lived a dream together
a dream of freedom
your dreams are n't about freedom
they 're about marion
you have to be a hero because you think she sees you
is that it
my dreams of marion are gone
i killed them myself
if i knew i could live with her on the other side of death i 'd welcome it
keep these
we 're going too
no
one of us is enough
they 're coming
how many
three maybe more
armed
they 're english soldiers ai n't they
with your father and brother gone they 'll kill us and burn the farm
it 's up to us hamish
wanna stay with me tonight
i wanna have supper waitin
we 'll get those english pigs tomorrow
aye we 'll get 'em
test of manhood
you win
call it a test of soldiery then
the english wo n't let us train with weapons so we train with stones
the test of a soldier is not in his arm
it 's here
i still say this is no test
a catapult can throw a stone farther than a man can
that depends on the man
good to see you again
i should'a remembered the eggs
all right father i 'll ask him
if i risk my neck for you will i get a chance to kill englishmen
is your poppa a ghost -- or do you converse with god almighty
in order to find his equal and irishman is forced to talk to god
yes father
the almighty says do n't change the subject just answer the fookin question
excellent
stephen is my name
i 'm the most wanted man on the emerald isle
except i 'm not on the emerald isle of course more 's the pity
a common thief
a patriot
we must run in different directions
we do n't split up
they used hounds on us in ireland it 's the only way
i am the one who is rotting
but i think your face looks graver than mine
he was so brave
with courage alone he nearly won
so more men were slaughtered uselessly
he broke because of me
i saw it
he lost all will to fight
we must have alliance with england to prevail here
you achieved that
you saved your family increased your lands
in time you will have all the power in scotland
yet you grieve
in my heart i had begun to hope that he would never break
all men lose heart
all betray
it is exactly why we must make the choices we make
where is my son
your pardon m'lord he asked me to come in his stead
i sent for him -- and the little coward send you
shall i leave m'lord
if he wants his queen to rule then you stay and learn how
i will deal with him
my son 's loyal wife returns unkilled by the heathen
so he accepted our bribe
no
he did not
then why does he stay
my scouts say he has not advanced
he waits
for you
he says he will attack no more towns -- if you are man enough to come fight him
you spoke with this wallace in private
what kind of man is he
... a mindless barbarian
not a king like you m'lord
the scottish nobles have sent him no support
his army starves
our stall has worked he must withdraw
you may return to your embroidery
humbly m'lord
treason
against whom
against thy king thou vile fool
hast thou anything to say
never in my whole life did i swear allegiance to your king --
it matters not he is thy king
-- while many who serve him have taken and broken his oath many times
i can not commit treason if i have never been his subject
confess and you may receive a quick death
deny and you must be purified by pain
do you confess
do you confess
i do not confess
then on the morrow thou shalt receive they purification
and in the end i promise you 'll beg for the axe
your father does n't like me does he
it 's not you
he dislikes that you 're a wallace
he just says
the wallaces do n't seem to live for very long
thank you for accepting
thank you for inviting
i 'll invite you again but your mother thinks i 'm crazy
you are
and i 'll come again
you 've been here before
some nights
i have dreams
mostly dreams i do n't want
i started riding at night to fill up my mind so that when i did sleep i 'd dream only of the ride and the adventure
did it work
no
you do n't choose your dreams
your dreams choose you
i want
to marry you
i
accept your proposal
i 'm not just saying it
nor i
but i wo n't give you up to any nobleman
you scare me
i do n't want to scare you
i want to be yours and you mine
every night like this one
this night is too beautiful to have again
i will be with you like this
forever
i 've missed you
shush
it 's only been a day
and it 's seemed like forever
tonight then
my parents are growing suspicious
i ca n't keep meeting you every night
then when
... tonight
i 'm dreaming
yes you are
and you must wake
i do n't want to wake
i want to stay with you
and i with you
but you must wake
i need you so much
i love you
wake up william
wake up
when the king returns he will bury them in those new clothes
scotland is in chaos
your husband is secretly sending an army north
how do you know this
last night i slept with a member of the war council
he should n't be telling secrets in bed
ah oui
englishmen do n't know what a tongue is for
i am the princess of wales
wife of edward the king 's son
i come as the king 's servant and with his authority
it 's battle i want not talk
but now that i am here will you speak with a woman
i understand that you have recently been given the rank of knight
i have been given nothing
god makes men what they are
did god make you the sacker of peaceful cities
the executioner of the king 's nephew my husband 's own cousin
york was the staging point for every invasion of my country
and that royal cousin hanged a hundred scots even women and children from the city walls
that is not possible
let us talk plainly
you invade england
but you can not complete the conquest so far from your shelter and supply
the king proposes that you withdraw your attack
in return he grants you title estates and this chest with a thousand pounds of gold which i am to pay to you personally
a lordship
and gold
that i should become judas
peace is made is such ways
slaves are made in such ways
i understand you have suffered
i know
about your woman
she was my wife
we married in secret because i would not share her with an english lord
they killed her to get to me
and she was pregnant
a meeting in a barn
it had to be a trap
and only you would know i would be aware of it
it does me good to see you
why did you
because of the way you 're looking at me now
the same way
as when we met
you have
you have a husband
i have taken vows
more than one
i 've vowed faithfulness to my husband and sworn to give him a son
and i can not keep both promises
you will die
it will be awful
every man dies
not every man really lives
drink this
it will dull your pain
it will numb my wits and i must have them all
if i 'm senseless or if i wail then longshanks will have broken me
i ca n't bear the thought of your torture
take it
wait
i respect what you said
but remember these men have lands castles
much to risk
and the common man who bleeds on the battlefield does he risk less
no
but from top to bottom this country has no sense of itself
its nobles share allegiance with england and its clans war with each other
if you make enemies on both sides of the border you 'll end up dead
we all end up dead
it 's only a question of how
and why
i 'm no coward
i want what you want
but we need the nobles
nobles
what does that mean -- to be noble
your title gives you claim to the throne of our country
but men do n't follow titles they follow courage
your arm speaks louder than your tongue
our people know you
noble and common they respect you
if you would lead them toward freedom they would follow you
and so would i.
war finds me willing
i know it wo n't bring back all i have lost
but it can bring what none of us have ever had -- a country of our own
for that we need a king
we need you
i am trying
then tell me what a king is
is he a man who believes only what others believe
is he one who calculates the numbers for and against him but never weighs the strength in your own heart
there is strength in you
i see it
i know it
i must
consult with my father
and i will consult with mine
we ca n't stop
they 've tricked us
what 's the crazy man saying lord
the dogs have a scent
my scent
someone must have given it to them
who would do such a thing
exactly
i thought i was dead when ya pulled that dagger
no english lord would trust an irishman
fine speech
now what do we do
bring out our spearmen and set them in the field
i was going to show this to the principal but i wanted to talk to you first
what is it
yesterday i had all the children draw pictures of what they wanted to be when they grew up
most of them made drawings of what their parents did but this
thank you for showing it to me first
i 'll
i 'll take care of it
can i have the picture
of course
there is one more thing mrs. treborn
and i feel bad for mentioning it
what
when i asked evan about his drawing well he did n't remember doing it
and you say he does n't remember any of it
not according to his teacher
it just got me thinking about jason and what if evan 's inherited his father 's condition
hold it hold it andrea
let 's not jump to conclusions
i 'll run some preliminary tests see what we can rule out
just tell me that evan does n't have jason 's illness
look andrea i 'm sure he 'll test negative for brain disorders
but there 's something else you can try to monitor his memory
anything
a journal
just have him write down everything he does
why
what for
it could be extremely useful to jog his memory
see if he remembers anything new the next day
and i 'll have the test results back in a few days
well the good news is that the results are negative
i 've found no evidence in the way of lesions hemorrhaging tumors
and the bad news
unfortunately we 've got nothing to work with
it 's harder playing detective now
but you must have something to go on
if i had to guess i 'd say the blackouts are stress related
but he 's seven
what kind of stress can he have
plenty
who knows
maybe he 's got severe coping problems about not having a father
did you say the last blackout occurred when he was with his friend 's dad
come on i doubt the answer 's that simple
you 'd be surprised how often they are
well he has been pushing me to meet his father but i 've been putting it off
it 's worth a shot
i can arrange a controlled meeting
a careful dose of sedatives for jason some security you and i monitoring
evan comes in for a quick visit and with any luck no more missing father complex
how soon
evan wake up oh please wake up
nine ten
and you 're awake
open your eyes dammit
actually these tests were n't available twenty years ago
so what did you find
no dances just tell me
the hemorrhaging
the neural damage is irreparable
i 'm frankly surprised he still has use of his motor functions
darn it
um
can dad come this time
you know the answer to that
ca n't he come out for one day
we 've been over this a hundred times
it 's too dangerous for him
but lenny said that his dad 's coming
and tommy and kayleigh 's dad
all the dads are gon na be there
i get the point kiddo
but i 'm not so bad am i
no
good
because i 've been waiting to see your art projects all week and i 'd feel terrible if all you thought about was your father not being there
i do n't like this place mom
it 's creepy
please can we go
i promise i wo n't make any more bad pictures
you 'll be fine
dr. redfield just wants to give you some tests
you 'll like him
that 's why i wanted you to come here evan
dr. redfield already has a background in memory loss
my father has a bad memory too
these'll bring you luck crockett
great
i 'll see you soon
what happened
honey
what were you doing with that
i
i do n't remember
now your father may seem sleepy to you but that 's just because of his medicine okay
okay
i do n't know
i do n't remember
something must 've happened
what set him off
i
i blacked out
do n't try to use your blackouts to get out of this one
i could n't tell if they were real memories or just phantoms
you know he might only have thought he actually remembered them
sure
and then just before it got so bad that he had to be committed he said that he could
what
what could he do
... i spoke to your new lawyer about the appeal
he 's sure he can get you off on self defense so if you 're patient
how long will i be in here
i do n't know
these things take time
how 's kayleigh doing
she all right
i found these
the others are still in storage
damn it mom
i told you i need them all
fine
you 'll get them evan
but i think it 's far more important to focus on your case right now
okay doc
what 's the damage
how much time have i got
cute evan
what does that mean for evan
he 's saying it 's like forty years worth of new memories have been jammed in my brain since last year
overload city
sat about the gist of it doc
there must be a way to fix this
fix
i just need the entry about the blockbuster
wait shit no arms
i never even got the chance to write it
you 're
acting
like your father
come on mom
just 'cause dad was my age when he started going crazy does n't mean that i 'm nuts
how
did you
know that
you told me that on parents weekend
remember
wait that was n't me
or you
you 're religious carlos you believe that bit about the lord works in mysterious ways
straight up
because i think he sent me to your cell on purpose
for you to help me
shit
i knew you were crazy
i ai n't bullshitting
jesus speaks to me in my dreams
so when i 'm out i need you to watch my face and hands closely
you need to see the prison shrink man
just tell me if anything weird happens
weirder than this
marks scars i dunno
anything could happen i guess
what did you see
what did it look like
signs of the lord
they just appeared out of nowhere
i thought you were loco
so you believe me
hello evan
it 's very nice to meet you
he 's as handsome as his father
you know my father
dad lives here
not in this wing actually
no
now i want you to go back to the time you were in the woods with lenny
think of it like a movie
you can pause rewind or slow down any details you wish
understand
yes
where are you now
i 'm standing next to kayleigh my hands are over her ears
are you hurting her
no protecting her
okay
then go a little forward in time
what do you see now
i see a car
this is where we 're finding most of the hemorrhaging
the outer lining of the cerebral cortex
lemme guess
would that be where the memories are stored
hey evan
what 's the big rush
we do n't meet for another hour
where are my goddamn books
books
my journals
where are they
think evan
you 've invented a disease that does n't exist
alternate universes with colleges prisons paraplegia
but i
i need those books
you remind me of your father
he always screamed for a photo album even though he never had one
photos
get dressed thumper you 're taking me out for my birthday
i thought you were a december baby
this is bigger
seven years to the day
no blackouts
it 's an experiment with flatworms and a maze
you take a flatworm and run it through the maze until he 's memorized it
then you put a new flatworm in the maze
he 's clueless
banging into walls getting lost whatever
like ozzy
just by absorbing the first worm into its cellular structure it gets all of the worm 's memories
that 's probably why hannibal lecter 's so smart
you really think he wanted to kill you
all i know is that i might be able to unblock some of my repressed memories
i never wanted to be in the movie anyway and it was cold so i wanted to wear my clothes but mr. miller took his shirt off --
what the fuck are you doing
shhh
i need quiet for this
get out
both of you
sorry dude
just figured it 'd be okay with you bein sick and all
we should go soon
if dad catches us smoking down here we 're dead
so let 's go
this place creeps me out
oh god
what did we do
shit lenny
what 's happened to you
we 've got ta get help
i 'm sorry kayleigh
this was a bad idea
you really do n't remember anything that happened
ouch
i 'm sorry
it 's not your fault
mrs. kagan called dad and blamed us for what happened to lenny
damn
your dad did this
i deserve a lot worse
what are you talking about
what you deserve is a better brother and father
all they do is make you feel like shit
i ca n't believe tommy 's still pissed at me
he knows i 'm moving away right
he 's been acting real strange lately
he wo n't even look me in the eyes anymore
duck here they come
god evan
i never thought i 'd see you again
how 've you been
oh comme si comme ca you know
no evan
i do n't know
it 's been a long time
fill me in
i 'm going to state now
things are going okay
i guess
mom 's good
not since we were kids
i 've stopped a hundred times
so how 's tommy
they kept him in juvy for a few years
now he works over at dale 's autobody
no
i emancipated myself when i was fifteen
wow
that must 've taken some courage
not if you remember my dad
could n't you have moved in with your mom
she had a new family
not enough space for me
said i should have moved in with her when we were kids
but
whatever
actually kayleigh the reason i came back to town was to talk to you
me
are you kidding
why
remember when i was a kid i had all these blackouts
of course
well lately some of the memories have begun to come back and i 'd kinda like to talk to you about one of them in particular
it 'd be a big help
well sure
i 'll try to remember
shoot
when we were kids
your dad was making a movie
robin hood or something
what do you want to know evan
it 's just
did he
what happened in the basement
it was a long time ago
i know but
is that why you came all the way back
to ask a lot of stupid questions about robin hood
no but i think something really bad might 've happened to us
just shut up evan
you 're wasting your breath
you ca n't hate yourself just because your dad 's a twisted freak
who are you trying to convince evan
you come all the way out here to stir up my shit just because you had a bad memory
you want me to cry on your shoulder and tell you that everything 's all better now
well fuck you evan
nothing 's gon na be all better
okay
nothing ever gets better
jesus kayleigh you 're
incredible
mmmm
you give good compliment
clean up and come back to bed
where
where are my clothes
those are your clothes silly
hey uh do n't go freaking out on me over this but do you remember when your dad first got his video camera
well i remember he had one
but he like put it away after the first day
why would that freak me out
i dunno
just being weird
i do n't understand where are you taking me
you 'll see
i do n't know what to say
it 's beautiful
go on
sit down
why are you doing all this for me
simple math
when i woke up this morning and saw your smile
i knew that i wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
it 's my fault
i should have told you he was released a few weeks ago
might'a been nice
like this is gon na do any good
maybe one of the frat guys has a gun
please evan
do n't even joke
he would n't hurt you
he 's just trying to scare you away from me
yeah right
tell that to crockett
it 's not his fault evan
you knew how bad he had it when we were kids
do n't give me this oprah book club bad upbringing shit because you turned out fine
my father never laid a hand on me
it 's like the prick saved it all up for tommy
are you okay
what do you mean
it 's just
you 've been acting kinda strange you know
like how
i do n't know
you seem
different
you make weird jokes
your accents changed
you do n't even walk the same
i walk differently
i ca n't put my finger on it but everything 's a bit off
even the dinner tonight
it was beautiful but
i know i 've been actin strange lately
it 's just that
i do n't want anything to happen to us
wait
something 's not right
is n't that your jacket
what
evan stop
you 're gon na kill him
he 's a fucking maniac
i want you to take this lenny
today 's your day of atonement
i know how guilty you feel about that woman and her baby --
evan
stop it
it 's not the time
now 's the only time
today you get a chance to redeem yourself
start over with a clean slate
tabula rasa --
what 's happened to you
you would n't believe me
i mean people always say you would n't believe me but in this case it 's not even worth trying
i 've seen some sickening shit
i do n't blink twice anymore especially in your case
why 's that
because you 're
different
different
how
let me ask you a question
just a little one that 's been gnawing at me for years
yeah
on the bridge
how did you know that tommy had your dog
that was no fucking hunch
do you remember when i was a kid and i had those blackouts
you 're right evan i do n't believe you
i never thought you would
that 's why i 've never bothered to tell a soul until now and why i never will again
i 'm the only person you 've told
that 's a great line
does that make other girls swoon
do they actually eat up this bullshit
i could n't give a shit if you believe me or not and frankly i 'm too tired to prove it to you
oh
there 's proof now
shit
i dunno
how would i know about the twin moles on your inner thigh
anyone with fifty bucks could tell you that
then forget that
how about
you prefer the smell of a skunk to flowers you hate cilantro because for reasons unknown to you it reminds you of your step sister
i just thought you should know
know what
that i did n't leave you there to rot
there 's one major hole in your story
which is
there is no fuckin way on this planet or any other that i was in some fuckin sorority
sure you do n't want your wallet
do n't think i 'll need it where i 'm going
off to change everyone 's life again is that it
maybe this time you 'll pop up in some mansion while i wind up in tijuana doing the donkey act
i 'm over it
whenever i try to help anyone it all turns to shit
well do n't give up now slick
you 've already done so much for me
hell why do n't you go back in time and save mrs. halpern and her baby
then maybe lenny would n't freak out and ruin my family
where are we going
we have to get you to sunnyvale
you 're having one of your famous hemorrhages
stop
take me back
you know how spiritual he 's gotten ever since he saved mrs. halpern and katie
he saved mrs. halpern
please the twisted fuck
is something the matter
yeah i think i got ta get these fixed or something
where am i
what happened
where did we all go
calm down kid
stand still
i was just somewhere else -- how did i get here
quit acting like some retard or i 'll call your mother and tell her what a naughty little shit you 've been
kayleigh
what happened
what time is it
it 's time for you to stand where the hell i told you
wrong answer fuckbag
this is the very moment of your reckoning
in the next thirty seconds you 're going to open one of two doors
the first door will forever traumatize your own flesh and blood
what 's happened to -- how are you doing that
it 'll change your daughter from a beautiful child into an empty shell whose only concept of trust was betrayed by her own sick pedophile father
ultimately it 'll lead to her suicide
nice work daddy
who -- who are you
let 's just say you 're being closely watched george
your other option is to get your porn off the rack and treat kayleigh like
oh let 's say like how a loving father treats his daughter
sound okay to you papa
... yes
listen close then fuckbag
you screw up again and i swear i 'll flat out castrate you
easy does it evan
do n't be a bad boy or i 'll tell mommy you were naughty
and i 'll tell the child protective services about your kiddie porn endeavors
one step closer and i 'll shove this up your ass
that 's dangerous
you could blow your hands off
been there done that
it 's okay
i wo n't bite
you 've seen pictures of me right
uh huh
mom says i have your eyes and your --
you ca n't play god son
it must end with me
just by being here you may be killing your mother
bullshit
i 'll send you a postcard when i 've made everything perfect again
evan you 're hysterical
you study for this
we 'll find out soon enough
me neither
you 're kidding
are these the answers
damn evan on the d.l.
thanks
wow
hey i want to do something really special for kayleigh tomorrow
if i said i needed some help from you and the brothers
i 'd say blow me
get the pledges to do it
i 'm not sure
i might have gotten some stories mixed up
did pavlov condition his dogs to lick his nuts
typical psych major
a complete wise ass
and how 's your project coming
still planning to change the way we humble scientists view memory assimilation
hey i got no choice
whoa
did n't mean to scare you evan
just wanted to know how the flatworms project was coming
oh fine i guess
it 's been kind of crazy lately with my mom coming up so i have n't
i know i know
who can think of worms when your libido 's in full swing right
just do n't drop the ball okay
i wo n't let you down professor carter
remember everyone
only two weeks until your science projects are due
i still owe you an essay from last week
is there any way i could get an extension
and you are
evan treborn
the answer 's no mr. treborn
now take a seat
the exam 's about to begin
so what 's the point
maybe if i can figure out how the memories of a simple worm function it 'll help me understand the complexities of the human brain
freeze
no worm boy
no mr. worm and no worm master general
once you get a nickname like that you ca n't shake it
and i do n't want everyone thinking i 've got tapeworms coming out of my ass or something okay
deal
now read me something
come on go on
it was like tommy was possessed or something
there was a hate in his eyes that i could n't really call human
it did n't feel like a dream
maybe because they never do
so don juan you pass out on all your dates
can
can
can i have this
sure
i was gon na make a new one anyway
that should buy you ten minutes at least
gee thanks friend
i could n't cut the rope
yeah good what else do you remember
drop it or i 'll slit your mother 's throat in her sleep
you knew the whole time did n't you
when you put the blade in my hand you knew something big was going to happen
did n't you
y
yes
i guess i did
uh we should be getting to class now
forget it
what 's the point of psych now
tomorrow i could wake up as some dirt farmer in bangladesh
hey what 'd you do that for
fat little baby crying for mommy
tommy i 'm bored shitless over here
what 's up already
hold your horses man
it 's here somewhere
i saw it when i was a kid
hurry
let 's go
get him up evan
come on
what happened
where are we
look what you made me do
what 's wrong with you
leave us alone you sick fuck
get this us shit
as if i was gon na lay a hand on my own sister
you 've done nicely for yourself evan
nice friends nice life not to mention you 're fucking my sister
not a bad piece of ass if i say so myself
what the hell are you doing
it was n't enough that the whole world loves you but you had to take away the last person on earth who did n't think i was a piece of shit
no one thinks you 're a piece of shit tommy
right evan
i believe you just said sick fuck
listen to me good evan
i 'll do whatever you want
you do n't want me to ever see kayleigh again fine
just let crockett go
besides you kill him now and they 'll stick you in juvy for sure
and i know you 'd never leave your sister alone with your father
i did what you said man
we 're pooling our student funds with hillel house and we 're going to have an awareness dance
oh goody nothing like spinning my chair around to a techno mix of hava nagila til i puke
just get out didja
huh
nothing
just that my brother did a stint in the pen and he used to eat like that
i come from a big family
meant no offense
none taken
hey uh does kayleigh miller still work here
sorry
never heard of her
evan guess what
dad got a new video camera and we 're all gon na be in a movie
i do n't think evan gets to be in it --
quit it tommy
evan gets to be robin hood
i 'm gon na be maid marian and you 're the sheriff of nottingham
i thought i was the bad guy
you are silly
he 's a bad sheriff
what did i say about mentioning that bitch
where the hell are you taking us anyway
just blow something up already
just blow something up
are you nuts
there 's an art to mass destruction
would you just paint the mona lisa
no
besides we 're here already
wipe that sad assed look off your face before you get us all busted
you see the way evan 's mom was looking at you
i 'm sorry
lenny
come on
oh my god oh my god
shut up tommy
aw hey now that was a compliment
you put the mommy too far away
mrs. boswell has macaroni and glue if you wanna fix it
you 're such a retard
here you go buddy
what
no frigging way man
i 'm not touching that thing
the hell you are n't
anyone of us does it you 'll puss out and narc for sure
ai n't gon na work this time buddy
look how small that fuse is
i 'll get killed
how did you get in here
you 're under age
i came with captain renault
i should have known
my husband is with me too
he is
well captain renault 's getting broadminded
sit down
will you have a drink
no of course not
do you mind if i do
no
monsieur rick what kind of man is captain renault
oh he 's just like any other man only more so
no i mean is he trustworthy
is his word --
-- now just a minute
who told you to ask me that
he did
captain renault did
i thought so
where 's your husband
at the roulette table trying to win enough for our exit visa
well of course he 's losing
how long have you been married
eight weeks
we come from bulgaria
oh things are very bad there monsieur
a devil has the people by the throat
so jan and i we we do not want our children to grow up in such a country
so you decided to go to america
yes but we have not much money and traveling is so expensive and difficult
it was much more than we thought to get here
and then captain renault sees us and he is so kind
he wants to help us
yes i 'll bet
he tells me he can give us an exit visa but we have no money
does he know that
oh yes
and he is still willing to give you a visa
yes monsieur
and you want to know --
-- will he keep his word
he always has
nobody ever loved me that much
and he never knew and the girl kept this bad thing locked in her heart
that would be all right would n't it
you want my advice
oh yes please
go back to bulgaria
oh but if you knew what it means to us to leave europe to get to america
oh but if jan should find out
he is such a boy
in many ways i am so much older than he is
yes well everybody in casablanca has problems
yours may work out
you 'll excuse me
monsieur rick i --
-- he 's just a lucky guy
excuse me but you look like a couple who are on their way to america
well
you will find a market there for this ring
i am forced to sell it at a great sacrifice
thank you but i hardly think --
-- then perhaps for the lady
the ring is quite unique
mr. berger the ring could i see it again
yes monsieur
a champagne cocktail please
i recognize you from the news photographs monsieur laszlo
in a concentration camp one is apt to lose a little weight
we read five times that you were killed in five different places
as you see it was true every single time
thank heaven i found you berger
i am looking for a man by the name of ugarte
he is supposed to help me
i see
but we who are still free will do all we can
we are organized monsieur underground like everywhere else
tomorrow night there is a meeting at the caverne du bois
if you would come
monsieur rick may i get you a cup of coffee
no thanks carl
monsieur rick
well you are in pretty good shape herr rick
how long can i afford to stay closed
oh two weeks maybe three
maybe i wo n't have to
a bribe has worked before
in the meantime everybody stays on salary
oh thank you herr rick
sacha will be happy to hear it
i owe him money
now you finish locking up will you carl
i will
then i am going to the meeting of the --
-- do n't tell me where you 're going
i wo n't
goodnight
goodnight monsieur rick
the police break up our meeting
herr rick
we escaped in the last moment
come up here a minute
yes i come
i want you to turn out the light in the rear entrance
it might attract the police
but sacha always puts out that light --
-- tonight he forgot
yes i come i will do it
here you are
it shall not happen again monsieur
that 's all right
here 's to you sir
er good luck yes
i 'd better be going
er my check please
i have to warn you sir
i beseech you
er goodbye sir
it has been a pleasure to meet you
hello rick
hello ferrari
how 's business at the blue parrot
fine but i would like to buy your cafe
it 's not for sale
you have n't heard my offer
it 's not for sale at any price
what do you want for sam
i do n't buy or sell human beings
that 's too bad
that 's casablanca 's leading commodity
in refugees alone we could make a fortune if you would work with me through the black market
suppose you run your business and let me run mine
suppose we ask sam
maybe he 'd like to make a change
suppose we do
my dear rick when will you realize that in this world today isolationism is no longer a practical policy
i see the bus is in
i 'll take my shipment with me
no hurry
i 'll have it sent over
have a drink with me
i never drink in the morning
and every time you send my shipment over it 's always just a little bit short
carrying charges my boy carrying charges
here sit down
there 's something i want to talk over with you anyhow
the bourbon
the news about ugarte upset me very much
you 're a fat hypocrite
you do n't feel any sorrier for ugarte than i do
of course not
what upsets me is the fact that ugarte is dead and no one knows where those letters of transit are
practically no one
if i could lay my hands on those letters i could make a fortune
so could i. and i 'm a poor businessman
i have a proposition for whoever has those letters
i will handle the entire transaction get rid of the letters take all the risk for a small percentage
and the carrying charges
naturally there will be a few incidental expenses
that is the proposition i have for whoever has those letters
i 'll tell him when he comes in
rick i 'll put my cards on the table
i think you know where those letters are
well you 're in good company
renault and strasser probably think so too
that 's why i came over here to give them a chance to ransack my place
rick do n't be a fool
take me into your confidence
you need a partner
do n't forget you owe rick 's a hundred cartons of american cigarettes
i shall remember to pay it
to myself
you see my dear the word has gone around
as leader of all illegal activities in casablanca i am an influential and respected man
it would not be worth my life to do anything for monsieur laszlo
you however are a different matter
signor ferrari thinks it might just be possible to get an exit visa for you
i will stay here and keep on trying
i 'm sure in a little while --
-- we might as well be frank monsieur
it will take a miracle to get you out of casablanca
and the germans have outlawed miracles
we 've decided signor ferrari
for the present we 'll go on looking for two exit visas
thank you very much
well good luck
but be careful
you know you 're being shadowed
i observe that you in one respect are a very fortunate man monsieur
i am moved to make one more suggestion why i do not know because it can not possibly profit me but have you heard about signor ugarte and the letters of transit
yes something
those letters were not found on ugarte when they arrested him
do you know where they are
not for sure monsieur but i will venture to guess that ugarte left those letters with monsieur rick
rick
he is a difficult customer that rick
one never knows what he 'll do or why
but it is worth a chance
thank you very much
good day
it was gracious of you to share it with me
good day mademoiselle monsieur
good day
-- it was la belle aurore
how nice
you remembered
but of course that was the day the germans marched into paris
not an easy day to forget
no
i remember every detail
the germans wore gray you wore blue
yes
i put that dress away
when the germans march out i 'll wear it again
say goodnight to sam for me
i will
there 's still nobody in the world who can play as time goes by like sam
he has n't played it in a long time
who are you really
and what were you before
what did you do and what did you think
huh
we said no questions
here 's looking at you kid
a franc for your thoughts
in america they 'd bring only a penny
i guess that 's about all they 're worth
i 'm willing to be overcharged
tell me
and i was wondering
yes
why i 'm so lucky
why i should find you waiting for me to come along
why there is no other man in my life
uh huh
that 's easy
there was
he 's dead
i 'm sorry for asking
i forgot we said no questions
well only one answer can take care of all our questions
richard they 'll find out your record
it wo n't be safe for you here
i 'm on their blacklist already their roll of honor
my german 's a little rusty
it 's the gestapo
they say they expect to be in paris tomorrow
with the whole world crumbling we pick this time to fall in love
yeah
it 's pretty bad timing
where were you say ten years ago
ten years ago
let 's see
yes
i was having a brace put on my teeth
where were you
looking for a job
was that cannon fire or is it my heart pounding
ah that 's the new german 77
and judging by the sound only about thirty five miles away
that 's too far ahead to plan
yes i guess it is a little too far ahead
well let 's see
what about the engineer
why ca n't he marry us on the train
oh darling
well why not
the captain on a ship can
it does n't seem fair that
hey hey what 's wrong kid
i love you so much and i hate this war so much
oh it 's a crazy world
anything can happen
if you should n't get away i mean if if something should keep us apart wherever they put you and wherever i 'll be i want you to know
oh
i saved my first drink to have with you
here
no
no rick
not tonight
especially tonight
please
why did you have to come to casablanca
there are other places
i would n't have come if i had known that you were here
believe me rick it 's true
i did n't know
it 's funny about your voice how it has n't changed
i can still hear it
richard dear i 'll go with you any place
we 'll get on a train together and never stop
please do n't
do n't rick
i can understand how you feel
huh
you understand how i feel
how long was it we had honey
i did n't count the days
well i did
every one of them
mostly i remember the last one
a wow finish
a guy standing on a station platform in the rain with a comical look on his face because his insides had been kicked out
can i tell you a story rick
has it got a wow finish
i do n't know the finish yet
well go on tell it
maybe one will come to you as you go along
it 's about a girl who had just come to paris from her home in oslo
at the house of some friends she met a man about whom she 'd heard her whole life a very great and courageous man
he opened up for her a whole beautiful world full of knowledge and thoughts and ideals
everything she knew or ever became was because of him
and she looked up to him and worshipped him with a feeling she supposed was love
yes that 's very pretty
i heard a story once
as a matter of fact i 've heard a lot of stories in my time
they went along with the sound of a tinny piano playing in the parlor downstairs mister i met a man once when i was a kid it 'd always begin
huh
i guess neither one of our stories was very funny
tell me who was it you left me for
was it laszlo or were there others in between
or are n't you the kind that tells
i 'm sorry i was in no condition to receive you when you called on me last night
it does n't matter
why did you come back
to tell me why you ran out on me at the railway station
yes
well you can tell me now
i 'm reasonably sober
i do n't think i will rick
why not
after all i got stuck with a railway ticket
i think i 'm entitled to know
last night i saw what has happened to you
the rick i knew in paris i could tell him
he 'd understand
but the one who looked at me with such hatred
well i 'll be leaving casablanca soon and we 'll never see each other again
we knew very little about each other when we were in love in paris
if we leave it that way maybe we 'll remember those days and not casablanca not last night
did you run out on me because you could n't take it
because you knew what it would be like hiding from the police running away all the time
you can believe that if you want to
well i 'm not running away any more
i 'm settled now above a saloon it 's true but
walk up a flight
i 'll be expecting you
all the same someday you 'll lie to laszlo
you 'll be there
no rick
no you see victor laszlo is my husband
and was even when i knew you in paris
richard richard we loved each other once
if those days meant anything at all to you --
-- i would n't bring up paris if i were you
it 's poor salesmanship
please
please listen to me
if you knew what really happened if you only knew the truth --
-- i would n't believe you no matter what you told me
you 'd say anything now to get what you want
no
oh richard i 'm sorry
i 'm sorry but but you you are our last hope
if you do n't help us victor laszlo will die in casablanca
what of it
i 'm going to die in casablanca
it 's a good spot for it
-- all right
i tried to reason with you
i tried everything
now i want those letters
get them for me
i do n't have to
i 've got them right here
put them on the table
no
for the last time put them on the table
if laszlo and the cause mean so much to you you wo n't stop at anything
all right i 'll make it easier for you
and then
it was n't long after we were married that victor went back to czechoslovakia
they needed him in prague but there the gestapo were waiting for him
just a two line item in the paper victor laszlo apprehended
sent to concentration camp
i was frantic
for months i tried to get word
then it came
he was dead shot trying to escape
i was lonely
i had nothing
not even hope
then i met you
why were n't you honest with me
why did you keep your marriage a secret
oh it was n't my secret richard
victor wanted it that way
not even our closest friends knew about our marriage
that was his way of protecting me
i knew so much about his work and if the gestapo found out i was his wife it would be dangerous for me and for those working with me
when did you first find out he was alive
just before you and i were to leave paris together
a friend came and told me that victor was alive
they were hiding him in a freight car on the outskirts of paris
he was sick he needed me
i wanted to tell you but i i did n't care
i knew i knew you would n't have left paris and the gestapo would have caught you
so i
well well you know the rest
huh
but it 's still a story without an ending
what about now
now
i do n't know
i know that i 'll never have the strength to leave you again
and laszlo
oh you 'll help him now richard wo n't you
you 'll see that he gets out
then he 'll have his work all that he 's been living for
all except one
he wo n't have you
i ca n't fight it anymore
i ran away from you once
i ca n't do it again
oh i do n't know what 's right any longer
you 'll have to think for both of us for all of us
all right i will
here 's looking at you kid
i wish i did n't love you so much
richard victor thinks i 'm leaving with him
have n't you told him
no not yet
but it 's all right is n't it
you were able to arrange everything
everything is quite all right
oh rick
but why my name richard
because you 're getting on that plane
i do n't understand
what about you
i 'm staying here with him til the plane gets safely away
yes
she tried everything to get them and nothing worked
she did her best to convince me that she was still in love with me but that was all over long ago
for your sake she pretended it was n't and i let her pretend
hello sam
hello miss ilsa
i never expected to see you again
it 's been a long time
yes ma'am
a lot of water under the bridge
some of the old songs sam
yes ma'am
where is rick
i do n't know
i ai n't seen him all night
when will he be back
not tonight no more
he ai n't coming
uh he went home
does he always leave so early
oh he never
well
he 's got a girl up at the blue parrot
he goes up there all the time
you used to be a much better liar sam
leave him alone miss ilsa
you 're bad luck to him
play it once sam for old time 's sake
i do n't know what you mean miss ilsa
play it sam
play as time goes by
oh i ca n't remember it miss ilsa
i 'm a little rusty on it
victor i i feel somehow we should n't stay here
if we would walk out so soon it would only call attention to us
perhaps ugarte 's in some other part of the cafe
you are very kind
wo n't you join us
this time they really mean to stop me
victor i 'm afraid for you
we have been in difficult places before have n't we
goodnight
goodnight
we are only interested in two visas signor
please ilsa do n't be hasty
no victor no
no ilsa i wo n't let you stay here
you must get to america
and believe me somehow i will get out and join you
but victor if the situation were different if i had to stay and there were only a visa for one would you take it
yes i would
yes i see
when i had trouble getting out of lille why did n't you leave me there
and when i was sick in marseilles and held you up for two weeks and you were in danger every minute of the time why did n't you leave me then
i meant to but something always held me up
i love you very much ilsa
he does
could we have a table close to him
and as far away from major strasser as possible
what happened with rick
we 'll discuss it later
our faithful friend is still there
victor please do n't go to the underground meeting tonight
i must
besides it is n't often that a man has a chance to display heroics before his wife
do n't joke
after major strasser 's warning tonight i am frightened
to tell you the truth i am frightened too
shall i remain here in our hotel room hiding or shall i carry on the best i can
ilsa i --
-- yes
when i was in the concentration camp were you lonely in paris
yes victor i was
i know how it is to be lonely
is there anything you wish to tell me
no victor there is n't
i love you very much my dear
yes yes i know
victor whatever i do will you believe that i that --
-- you do n't even have to say it
i 'll believe
goodnight dear
be careful
of course i 'll be careful
are you ready ilsa
yes i 'm ready
goodbye rick
god bless you
captain the boy who is playing the piano somewhere i have seen him
sam
yes
he came from paris with rick
rick
who 's he
mademoiselle you are in rick 's and rick is --
-- is what
well mademoiselle he 's the kind of a man that well if i were a woman and i
were not around i should be in love with rick
but what a fool i am talking to a beautiful woman about another man
hello rick
oh you 've already met rick mademoiselle
well then perhaps you also ---
-- this is mr. laszlo
how do you do
how do you do
one hears a great deal about rick in casablanca
and about victor laszlo everywhere
wo n't you join us for a drink
and i congratulate you
what for
your work
thank you
i try
we all try
you succeed
i hope we did n't overstay our welcome
not at all
we 'll come again
any time
good morning
signor ferrari is the fat gent at the table
good evening
good evening
you see here we are again
i take that as a great compliment to sam
i suppose he means to you paris of well happier days
monsieur blaine i wonder if i could talk to you
go ahead
well is n't there some other place
it 's rather confidential what i have to say
my office
right
you must know it 's very important i get out of casablanca
it 's my privilege to be one of the leaders of a great movement
you know what i have been doing
you know what it means to the work to the lives of thousands and thousands of people that i be free to reach america and continue my work
i 'm not interested in politics
the problems of the world are not in my department
i 'm a saloon keeper
my friends in the underground tell me that you have quite a record
you ran guns to ethiopia
you fought against the fascists in spain
what of it
is n't it strange that you always happened to be fighting on the side of the underdog
yes
i found that a very expensive hobby too
but then i never was much of a businessman
do n't you sometimes wonder if it 's worth all this
i mean what you 're fighting for
we might as well question why we breathe
if we stop breathing we 'll die
if we stop fighting our enemies the world will die
what of it
then it 'll be out of it 's misery
you know how you sound monsieur blaine
like a man who 's trying to convince himself of something he does n't believe in his heart
each of us has a destiny for good or for evil
yes i get the point
i wonder if you do
i wonder if you know that you 're trying to escape from yourself and that you 'll never succeed
you seem to know all about my destiny
i know a good deal more about you than you suspect
i know for instance that you are in love with a woman
it is perhaps strange that we both should be in love with the same woman
the first evening i came here in this cafe i knew there was something between you and ilsa
since no one is to blame i i demand no explanation
i ask only one thing
you wo n't give me the letters of transit
all right
but i want my wife to be safe
i ask you as a favor to use the letters to take her away from casablanca
you love her that much
apparently you think of me only as the leader of a cause
well i am also a human being
monsieur blaine i do n't know how to thank you
oh save it
we 've still lots of things to do
i brought the money monsieur blaine
keep it
you 'll need it in america
but we made a deal
oh never mind about that
you wo n't have any trouble in lisbon will you
no
it 's all arranged
good
i 've got the letters right here all made out in blank
everything in order
all except one thing
there 's something you should know before you leave
monsieur blaine i do n't ask you to explain anything
i 'm going to anyway because it may make a difference to you later on
you said you knew about ilsa and me
yes
but you did n't know she was at my place last night when you were
she came there for the letters of transit
is n't that true ilsa
i understand
here it is
monsieur laszlo is it not
yes
i am captain renault prefect of police
yes
what is it you want
merely to welcome you to casablanca and wish you a pleasant stay
it is not often we have so distinguished a visitor
thank you
i hope you 'll forgive me captain but the present french administration has not always been so cordial
may i present miss ilsa lund
i was informed you were the most beautiful woman ever to visit casablanca
that was a gross understatement
my bill
no
two champagne cocktails please
well
a precedent is being broken
er emil
this is a very interesting cafe
i congratulate you
ricky you 're becoming quite human
i suppose we have to thank you for that mademoiselle
ilsa i do n't wish to be the one to say it but it 's late
so it is
and we have a curfew here in casablanca
it would never do for the chief of police to be found drinking after hours and have to fine himself
tomorrow at ten at the prefect 's office
we 'll be there
goodnight
i am delighted to see you both
did you have a good night 's rest
i slept very well
that 's strange
nobody is supposed to sleep well in casablanca
may we proceed with the business
with pleasure
wo n't you sit down
thank you
i am afraid not
my regrets monsieur
well perhaps i shall like it in casablanca
and the honor of having served the third reich
i was in a german concentration camp for a year
that 's honor enough for a lifetime
monsieur insofar as it is in my power --
-- thank you
by the way monsieur last night you evinced an interest in signor ugarte
yes
i believe you have a message for him
nothing important but may i speak to him now
i 've never accepted that privilege and i 'm now on french soil
i should like to discuss some matters arising from your presence on french soil
this is hardly the time or the place
then we shall state another time and another place
tomorrow at ten in the prefect 's office with mademoiselle
captain renault i am under your authority
is it your order that we come to your office
very well herr laszlo we will not mince words
you are an escaped prisoner of the reich
so far you have been fortunate enough in eluding us
you have reached casablanca
it is my duty to see that you stay in casablanca
whether or not you succeed is of course problematical
not at all
captain renault 's signature is necessary on every exit visa
captain would you think it is possible that herr laszlo will receive a visa
is that all you wish to tell us
do n't be in such a hurry
you have all the time in the world
you may be in casablanca indefinitely
or you may leave for lisbon tomorrow on one condition
and that is
you know the leaders of the underground movement in paris in prague in brussels in amsterdam in oslo in belgrade in athens
even in berlin
yes even in berlin
if you will furnish me with their names and their exact whereabouts you will have your visa in the morning
you will give us the names
if i did n't give them to you in a concentration camp where you had more persuasive methods at your disposal i certainly wo n't give them to you now
and what if you track down these men and kill them
what if you murdered all of us
from every corner of europe hundreds thousands would rise to take our places
even nazis ca n't kill that fast
herr laszlo you have a reputation for eloquence which i can now understand
but in one respect you are mistaken
you said the enemies of the reich could all be replaced but there is one exception
no one could take your place in the event anything unfortunate should occur to you while you were trying to escape
you wo n't dare to interfere with me here
this is still unoccupied france
any violation of neutrality would reflect on captain renault
for the time being
good day
unoccupied france welcomes you to casablanca
thank you captain
it 's very good to be here
major strasser my aide lieutenant casselle
you may find the climate of casablanca a trifle warm major
oh we germans must get used to all climates from russia to the sahara
but perhaps you were not referring to the weather
what else my dear major
by the way the murder of the couriers what has been done
realizing the importance of the case my men are rounding up twice the usual number of suspects
thank you
it is a pleasure to have you here major
champagne and a tin of caviar
may i recommend veuve cliquot 26 a good french wine
thank you
especially so tonight major
in a few minutes you will see the arrest of the man who murdered your couriers
i expected no less captain
rick this is major heinrich strasser of the third reich
how do you do mr. rick
you repeat third reich as though you expected there to be others
well personally major i will take what comes
do you mind if i ask you a few questions
unofficially of course
ho diplomatist
how about new york
rick is completely neutral about everything
and that takes in the field of women too
you were n't always so carefully neutral
we have a complete dossier on you
of course one must admit he has great courage
i admit he is very clever
three times he slipped through our fingers
in paris he continued his activities
we intend not to let it happen again
you see major you have nothing to worry about rick
perhaps
as to laszlo we want him watched twenty four hours a day
it may interest you to know that at this very moment he is on his way here
you see captain the situation is not as much under control as you believe
my dear major we are trying to cooperate with your government but we can not regulate the feelings of our people
captain renault are you entirely certain which side you 're on
i have no conviction if that 's what you mean
i blow with the wind and the prevailing wind happens to be from vichy
and if it should change
we are concerned about more than casablanca
we know that every french province in africa is honeycombed with traitors waiting for their chance waiting perhaps for a leader
a leader like laszlo
uh huh
i have been thinking
it is too dangerous if we let him go
it may be too dangerous if we let him stay
i see what you mean
you see what i mean
if laszlo 's presence in a cafe can inspire this unfortunate demonstration what more will his presence in casablanca bring on
i advise that this place be shut up at once
but everybody 's having such a good time
yes much too good a time
the place is to be closed
but i have no excuse to close it
find one
what is the meaning of that phone call
victor laszlo is on that plane
why do you stand here
why do n't you stop him
ask monsieur rick
hello louis
how extravagant you are throwing away women like that
someday they may be scarce
it was a combination of all three
and what in heaven 's name brought you to casablanca
my health
i came to casablanca for the waters
waters
what waters
we 're in the desert
i was misinformed
huh
rick there 's going to be some excitement here tonight
we are going to make an arrest in your cafe
what again
this is no ordinary arrest
a murderer no less
if you are thinking of warning him do n't put yourself out
he can not possibly escape
i stick my neck out for nobody
a wise foreign policy
you know rick we could have made this arrest earlier in the evening at the blue parrot but out of my high regard for you we are staging it here
it will amuse your customers
our entertainment is enough
i see
and what 's strasser doing here
he certainly did n't come all the way to casablanca to witness a demonstration of your efficiency
perhaps not
how observant you are
as a matter of fact i wanted to give you a word of advice
yeah
have a brandy
thank you
rick there are many exit visas sold in this cafe but we know that you have never sold one
that is the reason we permit you to remain open
i thought it was because we let you win at roulette
that is another reason
there is a man who 's arrived in casablanca on his way to america
he will offer a fortune to anyone who will furnish him with an exit visa
yeah
what 's his name
victor laszlo
victor laszlo
rick that is the first time i have ever seen you so impressed
well he 's succeeded in impressing half the world
it is my duty to see that he does n't impress the other half
rick laszlo must never reach america
he stays in casablanca
it 'll be interesting to see how he manages
manages what
his escape
oh but i just told you
--
-- stop it
he escaped from a concentration camp and the nazis have been chasing him all over europe
this is the end of the chase
twenty thousand francs says it is n't
is that a serious offer
i just paid out twenty
i 'd like to get it back
make it ten
i am only a poor corrupt official
okay
done
no matter how clever he is he still needs an exit visa or i should say two
why two
he is traveling with a lady
he 'll take one
i think not
i have seen the lady
and if he did not leave her in marseilles or in oran he certainly wo n't leave her in casablanca
maybe he 's not quite as romantic as you are
it does n't matter
there is no exit visa for him
louis whatever gave you the impression that i might be interested in helping laszlo escape
because my dear ricky i suspect that under that cynical shell you 're at heart a sentimentalist
oh how do you do
and you already know herr heinze of the third reich
that makes rick a citizen of the world
i was born in new york city if that 'll help you any
well you were asking about rick and here he is
mademoiselle may i present --
-- hello ilsa
oh no rick never --
-- thanks
i will
oh it 's my party
another precedent gone
this has been a very interesting evening
i 'll call you a cab
gasoline rationing time of night
well ricky
i 'm very pleased with you
now you 're beginning to live like a frenchman
that was some going over your men gave my place this afternoon
we just barely got cleaned up in time to open
well i told strasser he would n't find the letters here
but i told my men to be especially destructive
you know how that impresses germans
rick have you got these letters of transit
louis are you pro vichy or free french
serves me right for asking a direct question
the subject is closed
well it looks like you 're a little late
huh
so yvonne 's gone over to the enemy
who knows
in her own way she may constitute an entire second front
i think it 's time for me to flatter major strasser a little
i 'll see you later rick
but you have n't any actual proof and you know it
this is n't germany or occupied france
all you can do is fine him a few thousand francs and give him thirty days
you might as well let him go now
ricky i 'd advise you not to be too interested in what happens to laszlo
if by any chance you were to help him escape --
-- what makes you think i 'd stick my neck out for laszlo
because one you 've bet ten thousand francs he 'd escape
two you have the letters of transit now do n't bother to deny it
and well you might do it simply because you do n't like strasser 's looks
as a matter of fact i do n't like him either
well they 're all excellent reasons
do n't count too much on my friendship ricky
in this matter i 'm powerless
besides i might lose ten thousand francs
you 're not very subtle but you are effective
i i get the point
yes i have the letters but i intend using them myself
i 'm leaving casablanca on tonight 's plane the last plane
huh
and i 'm taking a friend with me
one you 'll appreciate
what friend
ilsa lund
that ought to put your mind to rest about my helping laszlo escape
the last man i want to see in america
you did n't come here to tell me this
you have the letters of transit
you can fill in your name and hers and leave any time you please
why are you interested in what happens to laszlo
ilsa is laszlo 's wife
she probably knows things that strasser would like to know
louis i 'll make a deal with you
instead of this petty charge you have against him you can get something really big something that would chuck him in a concentration camp for years
that would be quite a feather in your cap would n't it
it certainly would
germany
vichy would be very grateful
then release him
you be at my place a half hour before the plane leaves
i 'll arrange to have laszlo come there to pick up the letters of transit and that 'll give you the criminal grounds on which to make the arrest
you get him and we get away
to the germans that last will be just a minor annoyance
there 's still something about this business i do n't quite understand
miss lund she 's very beautiful yes but you were never interested in any woman
well she is n't just any woman
i see
how do i know you 'll keep your end of the bargain
i 'll make the arrangements right now with laszlo in the visitor 's pen
ricky i 'm going to miss you
apparently you 're the only one in casablanca who has even less scruples than i.
oh thanks
go ahead ricky
you 're late
i was informed just as laszlo was about to leave the hotel so i knew i 'd be on time
i thought i asked you to tie up your watchdogs
oh he wo n't be followed here
you know this place will never be the same without you ricky
yes i know what you mean but i 've already spoken to ferrari
you 'll still win at roulette
is everything ready
i have the letters right here
tell me when we searched the place where were they
sam 's piano
serves me right for not being musical
-- not so fast louis
nobody 's going to be arrested
not for a while yet
have you taken leave of your senses
i have
sit down over there
put that gun down
well i was right
you are a sentimentalist
stay where you are
i do n't know what you 're talking about
what you just did for laszlo and that fairy tale that you invented to send ilsa away with him
i know a little about women my friend
she went but she knew you were lying
anyway thanks for helping me out
i suppose you know this is n't going to be pleasant for either of us especially for you
i 'll have to arrest you of course
as soon as the plane goes louis
well rick you 're not only a sentimentalist but you 've become a patriot
maybe but it seemed like a good time to start
i think perhaps you 're right
it might be a good idea for you to disappear from casablanca for a while
there 's a free french garrison over at brazzaville
i could be induced to arrange a passage
my letter of transit
i could use a trip
but it does n't make any difference about our bet
you still owe me ten thousand francs
and that ten thousand francs should pay our expenses
our expenses
uh huh
louis i think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship
where were you last night
that 's so long ago i do n't remember
will i see you tonight
i never make plans that far ahead
give me another
sacha she 's had enough
do n't listen to him sacha
fill it up
rick i 'm sick and tired of having you --
-- sacha call a cab
come on we 're going to get your coat
take your hands off me
well there are certain sections of new york major that i would n't advise you to try to invade
aha
who do you think will win the war
i have n't the slightest idea
are my eyes really brown
you will forgive my curiosity mr. blaine
the point is an enemy of the reich has come to casablanca and we are checking up on anybody who can be of any help to us
my interest in whether victor laszlo stays or goes is purely a sporting one
in this case you have no sympathy for the fox huh
not particularly
i understand the point of view of the hound too
victor laszlo published the foulest lies in the prague newspapers until the very day we marched in and even after that he continued to print scandal sheets in a cellar
you 'll excuse me gentlemen
your business is politics
mine is running a saloon
good evening mr. blaine
i would advise you not to interfere
i was willing to shoot captain renault and i 'm willing to shoot you
hello
put that phone down
get me the radio tower
put it down
uh excuse me please
hello rick
hello ugarte
huh
you know rick watching you just now with the deutsches bank one would think you 'd been doing this all your life
well what makes you think i have n't
oh nothing
but when you first came to casablanca i thought --
-- you thought what
may i
too bad about those two german couriers was n't it
they got a lucky break
yesterday they were just two german clerks
today they 're the honored dead
you are a very cynical person rick if you 'll forgive me for saying so
rick
rick help me
do n't be a fool
you ca n't get away
rick hide me
do something
you must help me rick
do something
sam ferrari wants you to work for him at the blue parrot
i like it fine here
he 'll double what i pay you
yeah but i ai n't got time to spend the money i make here
sorry
boss
yeah
boss ai n't you going to bed
not right now
ai n't you planning on going to bed in the near future
no
you ever going to bed
no
well i ai n't sleepy either
good
then have a drink
no
not me boss
then do n't have a drink
boss let 's get out of here
no sir
i 'm waiting for a lady
please boss let 's go
ai n't nothing but trouble for you here
she 's coming back
i know she 's coming back
we 'll take the car and drive all night
we 'll get drunk
we 'll go fishing and stay away until she 's gone
shut up and go home will you
no sir
i 'm staying right here
they grab ugarte and she walks in
well that 's the way it goes
one in one out
sam
yeah boss
sam if it 's december 1941 in casablanca what time is it in new york
uh my watch stopped
i bet they 're asleep in new york
i 'll bet they 're asleep all over america
what 's that you 're playing
just a little something of my own
well stop it
you know what i want to hear
no i do n't
you played it for her and you can play it for me
well i do n't think i can remember it
if she can stand it i can
play it
yes boss
this sort of takes the sting out of being occupied does n't it mr. richard
you said it
here 's looking at you kid
and getting closer every minute
here
drink up
we 'll never finish the other three
the germans'll be here pretty soon now and they 'll come looking for you
and do n't forget there 's a price on your head
it 's bad
worse than warsaw
nobody remembers that
the failures they remember
it 's the successes they forget
save some for tomorrow
catch another fish tomorrow
shit
shit
shit
stay calm identify the problem
problem rope fraying
solution fix rope
with what
there 's nothing to fix it with
this rope comes undone you 're going to drown
get up
feels so good to lie here
get up damn you
ca n't
need water
you 've had today 's water
thirsty
come on shape up get going you can do it
no water no work
okay look i know you 're tired i know you 're thirsty but give it one more shot you 've just got to do a little more
do too much i 'll die
do too little you 'll die
going to die anyway
no more water you said
take it
no
take it damn it
no
wilson do you believe this
take the damn water
if they ca n't see you what 's the point
survive today that 's the point
get water
fix raft first
water water water --
you 're beautiful
marry me
you idiot if he dives he 'll capsize the raft
what are you doing
ca n't kill another one
ca n't
ca n't kill my friends anymore
you fucking bleeding heart you kill or you die
why do they have to die for me
they 'd eat you if they could
they 're laughing at you
listen
i 'm lost
goodbye
no
look just slip off the raft
the ocean would feel so good the water 's so soft and warm
take a little swim
sleep
you quitter you quitter you quitter
the sea is lovely dark and deep
but i have promises to keep
and miles to go before i sleep
and miles to go before i sleep
got to fix the sea anchor
use the sail
use the sail for a sea anchor and you wo n't move
if i do n't have a sea anchor i 'll capsize
die tomorrow or die today
that 's death knocking knocking on your door
crazy little woman come knocking knocking at my front door
grow up stop being such a baby
other people get through a lot worse
yeah sure what
you know wilson every now and then we should say thank you
thank you god
thank you for fucking up my life
what are you smiling about
they 'll be back
i 'm dancing on the roof of the peabody hotel
with kelly
what 's so damn funny
you are
jesus
look again asshole
it 's a mirage
it 's real
nothing out there but ocean
let 's get a second opinion
wilson
what do you see
what did it matter if fedex was five minutes late one day
the next day we just start over again
it matters
we do the best we can that 's all we have
then we 've just got shit
you ca n't make it
shut up
i do n't feel like dying today
you came on a bicycle
no wonder it 's so late
there was an unavoidable delay
well i have to say i 'm impressed
you never gave up
no
you know what happened to this
as much as anybody
want to come in
get dry for a minute
okay
sure
i ca n't believe this
i -- i -- they are
you 're a gifted artist
you 're into something very powerful
primal
truly
well not really i --
you are
yes you are
what gave you the idea to paint on that cave
to tell you the truth -- you did
do you
have any more packages to deliver
no
that was the last one
just sit here i 'll get us some lunch
keep painting
promise me
sure
did you really steal a crippled kid 's bicycle to make your deliveries or is that just some bullshit story
i did n't steal it and he was n't crippled
what brings you out to the sticks
had a package to deliver
you
personally
i had it on the island with me
must be a story there
yeah a long one
i 've got lots of time
so do i.
sonofabitch
hey be nice to it it 'll be nice to you
your eyes are puffy
did you take valium again
you smell like formaldehyde
got to follow the paper path here
chuck forget the xerox
so russia did n't turn out well
chuck
what do you want me to say
that i thought i 'd done a great job but it all turned to shit
that i might as well have gone sailing for all the good i did
yeah tell me
tell me all of it
merry christmas eve
not if you work for fedex
four four
a record
you do n't seem too happy about it
ah the staff meeting could have gone better
let me guess russia came up
hey look at you
i figure if we could take care of a puppy we could you know take care of --
he is a cute thing
he 's your cute thing
i ca n't even keep fish alive
a puppy 's got a little more personality than a fish
and for you --
you know for when you travel
for when i travel
i have to go
i 'm on call for overflow down at the hub
a ring
i wanted a ring
you did
that 's your dog
it 's our dog
it belongs to us
there is n't any us
yes there is
i 'm sorry about the presents
i got a little carried away
no it was great
maybe a little overkill --
i burned the christmas tree
why did n't you come over get mad at me tell me what a stupid bitch i was
i guess i had n't thought through how i felt
what you were going to come over the next day all calm and say kelly that really made me mad
do n't tell me you 're mad
be mad
be who you are right now
look we 'll do our trip as soon as i get back
do n't even start
get back
from where
malaysia
they 're holding the sweep
chuck you 're breaking my heart
a week max
okay
okay
go on
we 'll be fine
i 'll feed jango to the frogs
i 'm sorry
i 'm sorry
hey
hey
it 's okay
right back you said you 'd be right back
a few things came up
or went down
i got married
i thought you might have
i would never --
i know
if i 'd known you were alive --
i would have done the same thing
what 's that
that 's my sea anchor
my second one
made it out of part of the sail
it keeps you from capsizing in a storm
in theory
and this this i used to collect water
about half a cup a day
all that time i waited to go on a cruise and you went without me
yeah well
couldn't be helped
what 's that written on the sail
my epitaph
there was a coffin
yeah coffin headstone the whole thing
what was inside
your calendar your cell phone your whoo pig sooey hat some pictures of that ketch you wanted
that about sums it up
maybe now 's when you tell me about it
the plane went down
my friends died
i washed up on an island
then i found these barrels built the raft and here i am
yeah
the tide came in the tide went out
i survived
that 's the headline
i survived
do n't overwhelm me with the details
you know how i hate that
come on
try
cliches mainly
do n't take anyone for granted
do n't sweat the small stuff
live each day like it 's your last
so simple to say so hard to do
not when you have no choice
you hated being alone
could n't stand it
busy every minute
always plugged into something
i did n't know what really being alone was
no one back here does
this is so unfair
that 's what i told the fish i caught
but i ate them anyway
you okay
great
really
i love you chuck
you too
i 'm so glad you 're alive
i need the latest pdrs on st. petersburg
and how was your christmas
terrific
yours
when 's the next jumbo
the regular flight is scheduled for oh three hundred tomorrow
anything else
there 's a sweep leaving memphis in an hour goes through sydney
my favorite doctor
what 's the verdict
under the circumstances your overall health is good
those salt water boils you picked up on the raft are ulcerated but they 're healing nicely
sorry
sorry
why do my joints still ache
dehydration
vitamin deficiency
protein deficiency
any or all of the above
all i ate was fish
that 's solid protein
protein digestion is very costly in water usage
which i did n't have
and fish are very low in fat which is energy inefficient
so you 're going to burn up your own cells no matter how much you eat
luckily you ate the eyes and pancreas which contain some vitamin c so you did n't get scurvy
i am one lucky guy
your body chemistry and your exposure to the elements would normally lead to irritability depression anxiety periods of self reproach
it 's almost like schizophrenia
different sides of your personality might come to life speak out act out
but all that 's behind me
i 'm fine now
if you say you are
i most definitely say i am
doctor hegel tells me he discussed the vietnam pow syndrome with you
yes yes he did
you are aware of the potential disruptiveness on your loved ones when you return to your old life
not to mention on me
you 're not out of pascagoula are you
no
i used to drive one of those
a long time ago
hey once a driver always a driver
you want a lift
i 've just got one more pickup
sure
you 're chuck noland
yeah
bless us o lord and these thy gifts which we are about to receive from thou bounty through christ the lord
amen
let 's eat
thought you were going to bring her
so did i.
but chickens
sixty three pounds consumed per capita up from twenty seven in 1960
going to pass beef
chicken 's global
no religious taboos
you do n't see your hindus and your muslims boycotting poultry
true enough
no sacred chickens nowhere so far as i know
really
come on down to the plant
it 's state of the art
we 're doing for chickens what fedex did for the delivery business
just do n't count 'em before they hatch
what happened to your pants
mom meet jango
mom this is a farm
we 've got real strawberries growing outside we 've got real cream
oh no the prodigal son 's home
we bring out the store bought
maybe i should take a few days off
roger 's working now you could use some help around here
do n't you even think about it
the place is falling apart
i 'm doing fine
doing great mom do n't worry about me
there 's settled folks and there 's nomads
you 're just not a settled folk
you never belonged here
when 'd you start working here
roger got me on
i was n't doing anything and -- but you 're back you 're really back
i would have come to memphis but --
i wanted to come here
i 've got all this back pay coming
why do n't you let me get you a place in town
this is my home
i 'm part of the wallpaper
what a journey you 've had
it seems more than a person should have to bear
the tide saved me mom
i lived by it
i 'm just wondering where it will take me next
trying
kamal you 're breaking up
can you hear us
okay
after three years the ptr reverts to tape storage which is okay because we access it through the cpc
here it is
ten packages from the same sender
baku
delhi
st. petersburg
the guy was a real road warrior
this package was kuala lampur
no activity in his account after this package
no forwarding addresses after k.l.
what about the sender
sure
bettina peterson
marfa texas
let 's run a current check
what do you expect from the guy who stole a kid 's bicycle when his truck broke down
borrowed
i borrowed it
how 'd it go
great
terrific
the good guys won one for a change
you what
it was fifteen minutes late
i checked the weather you had the jet stream you could have made it up
but i might not have
jesus
i got it working
you have no idea how hard it was
they 're finally a team
i 'm touched
you fucked us over
the point of fedex as i understand it is to make the damn connection
i was making a point
what
let paris hold its plane
let memphis take care of it
let somebody down the line clean up your mess
every person counts every package counts that 's my point
you know what your problem is
you just see the packages in front of you
you do n't see the big picture
baloney
i do see the damn big picture
i did n't know we had sailboats
it 's a ketch kelly and i had chartered
for all those vacation days you got coming
and never take
look i 'm sorry about your plane
but i could n't risk being late into memphis
forget it
you know general mclelland he would n't attack unless he had everything just right
finally abe lincoln came to him and said general if you 're not going to use my army could i borrow it for a while
so he gave it to grant and grant just said let 's go
i 'm from arkansas
tell me a story with robert e. lee in it and maybe i 'll pay attention
we 're warriors not desk jockeys
we 've got to be bold
you always want all your ducks lined up
but nothing 's 100 percent
it 's always 60 40 maybe 51 49
hell i 'd take 40 60
then roll the dice
that 's why you 're a gambling man
that 's why i 'm running foreign and you 're not
that 's why you 're not married and i am
for the third time
take the plunge admit your mistakes move on to tomorrow
that 's fedex that 's women that 's life
you are one sick fucker
i 'm trying to help you here
there 's warsaw there 's this --
this was nothing like warsaw
i held the truck then minutes it 's not that big a deal
a hundred rubles st. petersburg hits 95 percent in a month
ninety five percent
just give me the money now
talk is cheap
are we on or not
we 're on
god damn
god damn
chuck it 's you
it 's me
you 're fucking dead
i 'm most definitely not dead
and as i recall you 're the sick fucker
i beat the odds
you beat 'em to shit pal
jesus
hello
this is amber
her boyfriend lost his foot in a shark attack
how about we go somewhere else
want to see my raft
this stinks really bad
you should have smelled me
cool ropes
i braided them
must have taken a hell of a long time
time i had lots of
you were how long on this
forty three days
when i first showed up i thought you 'd lost your fucking marbles
i never thought it would end
then it did
it was so great to be saved i could n't stop laughing
i 'm serious
the burning bush the big picture the words in neon
what 's it all about
it 's about being so thirsty you 'd crush a fish 's backbone to suck out the spinal fluid -- that 's what it 's about
to life
fuck 'em if they ca n't take a joke
to life
that 's all there is
believe me i know
digital laser readers
digital laser readers
wow
terrific
take your time
what
that 's what it 's about
being patient
do n't rush things
i get it
not just that
take your time
use it
live it
deep real deep
what then
deliver this package
then i dunno
you want that delivered we 'll deliver it
that 's what we do
i need to do it
finish what you started
you have n't changed chuck
it 's still you
thanks
for everything
no sweat
permission to come aboard sir
permission granted
may i ask where are you bound
san francisco
and you
as it happens i 'm headed for frisco myself
would you do us the honor of joining us
we 're just sitting down at mess
pork chops and gravy cranberries baked potatoes with all the trimmings fresh- baked bread apple pie
no please join me
some sundried fish strips a few eyeballs some gills to munch on
wilbur the adopting couple is waiting in your office
life is waiting
i was dreaming about you
how beautiful you were
you were n't dreaming about me
i was
then i was n't beautiful
you were
you are
it was fantastic
it was just the ether wilbur
they want to replace me
the board of trustees wants to replace me
they just want you to hire some new help
some new things would be useful
i do n't need any new help
he 'll need clothes
some money
let him try to make some money
that 's part of seeing the world is n't it
oh just stop it
you knew this was going to happen
he 's a young man
he 's still a boy -- out in the world he 's still a boy
just find him some clothes wilbur
he could use some clothes
he is a goddamn psychiatrist -- of course he wants to help
he 'd be happy if he could help commit me
it 's that mrs. goodhall you have to be careful of wilbur
one has to be more than careful of mrs. goodhall -- she has sufficient christian zeal to start her own country
i 'd like to give her a little ether
this is your life story wilbur
you just changed the dates
an internship and two years of training at the boston lying in south end branch
for his age he was judged an accomplished gynecological obstetrical surgeon he is also experienced in pediatric care
you invented him
you 've completely made his up
do n't you understand
the board is going to replace me
that 's what the new blood is for
these credentials are against the law
we all know who trained homer -- his credentials are as good as mine are
do n't you be holy to me about the law
what has the law done for any of us here
he sniffs that ether
i 've seen him do it
it 's because he 's too tired to sleep
he has to
he smells like he could put you to sleep
he 's a doctor buster -- doctors smell like ether
you 're a doctor homer -- you do n't smell like ether
i 'm not a doctor
i have n't been to medical school -- i have n't even been to high school
but you 've studied with the old man for years
i 'm not a doctor
i 'm sorry homer
i mean your parents
i know who you mean
i think about leaving here but not to find them*.
why not
whoever they were they did n't do any of the things parents are supposed to do
dr. larch did those things and nurse edna and nurse angela
yeah
but sometimes i wish i could meet mine anyway
what for buster
what would you do if you met them
uh
i 'd like to show them that i can cook a little
you cook very well
and that i can drive a truck
better than i can
sometimes i want to meet them so i can kill them
just sometimes
homer you know i would never kill anyone -- you know i would n't
i know
i think mary agnes could kill someone
i doubt it
she 's just an
what 's she so emotional about
i do n't know
she got left here like the rest of us did n't she
what 'd she die of
she died of secrecy she died of ignorance
what are you going to tell the little ones
i 'll tell them fuzzy was adopted
why would the little ones believe that anyone would adopt him
they 'll believe it because they want to believe it
should n't we tell homer
if homer wanted to know what was happening here he could pick up a telephone and call us
it 's time somebody ate them*.
i was lookin for wally 's letter
i was gon na show it to homer
they made him a captain already-- captain worthington
daddy it 's a letter to me*.
he mentions homer too you know
wally said to say hello
good night kids
do n't catch cold-- it 's gettin cold already
good night daddy
so mrs
candy
candy kendall
how many months are you
two
is your family in the apple business too
no but i work there -- i like it
my dad 's a lobsterman
i 've never seen a lobster
really
i 've never seen the ocean either
i know
he 's going to be dropping bombs on mandalay
they 're going to be shooting at him
where 's mandalay
burma
oh
i ca n't have a baby alone
i do n't even know if he 's coming back
i understand
i 'm a little worried about the
about how much bleeding is okay
it should taper off tomorrow but it can come back again
you have cramps
they 'll ease up almost entirely
as long as the bleeding is n't heavy it 's normal
i guess i 'll see you around the orchards
thanks for everything
sure
i 'll see you around
so
not bored yet
i 'm never bored
it 's all very
different for me
here
i better go
i do n't think mr. rose would leave without you
a movie outside
yes
but it 's closed all the time now because of the blackout
people watched the movies in their cars
when they watched at all
do you like movies
yes
i 've only seen one though
you 've seen only one movie
which one
king kong
it 's really good
but you looked as if you liked it
i did like it
all i said was it 's not king kong
first she loved him then she did n't then no one else could have him
she did love him
how many women have you known
and what did she die of exactly
she was torn apart
she died of a broken heart
oh sure
what 's the medical explanation
well she was in a weakened condition
i do n't know
what about king kong
is that medically possible
you 're a natural
you were born to drive a car like this
you think
maybe i was
i love this place
you do n't miss it
i miss things
i miss
people
i miss reading to the boys
but you had so much responsibility*.
i never asked for any responsibility
just a little privacy
privacy is exactly the point of drive- in movies
did you come here with wally -- to not watch movies
sometimes
movies mostly bore wally
ah ha
so what is that -- a radio
the speaker*. for the movie sound
how could you not care about the movie
you just cuddle
you come to hug
to kiss
you do n't come here to watch the movie
that 's what i 'd come here for
i 'd watch the movie
not with the right girl you would n't
are n't you worried that people will cut their feet
nobody will swim here until next summer
by then the water will have rubbed the glass smooth against the sand -- there wo n't be any sharp edges
i know this was right
right
just tell me
do you want me to go
do you want me to stay
it will be okay
what will be okay
we have to wait and see
i think that for everything in life you have to wait and see
olive told me
you might have told me yourself
i 'm just waiting and seeing
like you said
she wo n't go to st. cloud 's
well we ca n't force her
it 's her decision
you do n't understand
it 's her father
mr. rose knows
he 's the father
he 's her baby 's father
wait
wait
are you sure
we 've got to keep her away from that bastard
just tell me
i 'll do whatever you want to do
nothing
is n't that like waiting and seeing
no
nothing is nothing
i want wally to come home
i 'm afraid to see him too
i know
is that nothing
no don't -- that 's something
nothing is nothing
do n't even look at me
i want
please do n't move do n't go anywhere
go anywhere
of course not
that would be doing something would n't it
we would n't want to do something
let 's just sit here all night
if you 're trying to be funny homer
i 'm not trying to be anything -- i'm just doing nothing
if i wait and see long enough then -- with any luck-- i wo n't ever have to make up my mind
decisions can be painful after all
stop it
just cut it out
you got up
you did something
if you keep this up you might be in danger of making a decision
for god 's sake homer wally 's been shot down
i know i 'm sorry
he 's paralyzed
he 's alive*. he still loves you
so do i.
what do you want me to do
please do n't make me say it again
no that 's not it -- i just want to be sure i understand you
i helped you not to think about wally
you were so upset -- you could n't stand worrying about him about his being killed and not coming back-- but when you were with me you could stop worrying
well for a while anyway
this is how i helped you right
please
that 's enough
i loved you too -- you know i did
did
well okay
please do n't
and now that wally 's coming back and because he 'll certainly need you
you say that as though it 's some awful thing
i never stopped loving wally
i know you do n't think much of being needed or of me for that matter
i 'm sorry for what i said about wally needing you
it was
unnecessary
no i 'm the one who should be sorry
you have every right to be angry
no
you warned me
i did n't listen but you warned me
how is that wally doing
oh he 's fine
i just heard from him
he 's bombing all these places
hi
hi
i 've got some more clothes for you-- i just keep forgetting to bring them with me
i do n't need no more clothes thank you
rose i know what 's going on
homer told me
i got pregnant too -- about a year ago
i 've been through this
you ai n't been through what i been through candy
yes i have
i know where you can go
homer and i can take you
i ca n't go nowhere
why
you can trust me
is it jack
it 's not jack is it
it 's muddy
is it muddy
no
it ai n't muddy
muddy 's just
so many children
are they all orphans
well this is an orphanage
there
you said it was boring
well picking them is
it 's about as exciting as
walking
i love you wally
i love you too
see you tomorrow
i was just showing homer the orchards
kind of a geography lesson
i know what you 've been doing
you 've been giving him a flying lesson
he loved it
did n't you
he thinks people like to get whacked by branches
homer liked it
did n't you
i thought they might take me
they wanted a girl
nobody ever wants me
you 're one of the best curly -- we could n't let just anyone take you
dr. larch would n't let just anyone take any of us
that 's true
nobody 's asked for me have they
nobody special enough curly
you mean somebody asked
only the right people can have you curly
her temperature is a hundred and four
how old are you dear
thirteen
homer wells born portland maine march 2 1915
homer was born here in what was it 1922
graduated bowdoin college 1935 and harvard school of medicine 1939
you mean they 'll replace you with someone who wo n't perform abortions
well we can only guess about that edna
they are against the law
so here is my candidate
what do you think
but what about school records
homer does n't have any diplomas
or that he ca n't be bothered to write us a proper letter
a dissertation on apples we do n't need
he probably does n't make much money picking apples -- he must have had to pay to send them too
i would n't worry edna that he does n't have money
if he gets hungry he can pick his dinner
i just wanted to ask you
edna
come dance with me
let 's be foolish tonight
does he know he 's supposed to be in india
does he even want to come back
is your father dead
cirrhosis -- it 's a disease of the liver
liver killed him
alcohol killed him -- he drank himself to death
but did you know him
barely
it hardly mattered that i knew him
did you know your mother better
she 's dead now too
she was a nanny
what 's a nanny do
she looks after other people 's children
did you grow up around here
no
she was an immigrant
what 's an immigrant
someone not from maine
homer
does n't king kong think the woman is his mother
uh sure -- that 's what kong thinks all right
that 's why kong loves her
i was a posthumous child
my father 's eyes had closed upon the light of this world six months when mine opened on it
his father 's dead right
did you bite it
i do n't remember
it looks like you bit it -- it'll be all right
maybe i was kissing someone and he bit me
no you did it yourself
maybe in your sleep
i must have been dreaming of kissing someone
i 'm sorry
they 're not used to seeing a car like this
it 's okay -- i do n't mind
so now uh
you 're not
i mean do you do the--
no
dr. larch will be performing the procedure
ah well
okay
good
i just wondered
what kind of plane are you flying
a b-24 liberator
liberator
have you enlisted
they would n't take me
i 'm class iv-- i 've got a heart defect
really
is it serious
no it 's not serious
i 'm just not supposed to get excited
you know-- no strain no stress
i try to keep calm all the time
has anyone offered you anything to eat
actually someone did
i just did n't think i could eat anything
i wonder if you might give me a ride
sure
be glad to
uh
a ride where
where are you going
we 're heading back to cape kenneth
i think i 'd probably like the apple business
you 're a little overqualified are n't you
no i 'm not
i need a job
the only jobs are picking jobs
picking apples is truly boring
this is all normal
do n't worry
the abortion procedure
it affects you
it 's the ether too
it 'll take a little time
i do n't have any time
there 's a war
it 's all very normal
what lousy luck -- i mean your orders
to draw an assignment like that
actually i volunteered
uh look
if you 're serious about wanting a job picking apples is n't that boring
oh i would love that wally
they 're migrants
migrants
yes
they pick fruit all kinds
they travel up and down the coast with the seasons
the trick to mr. rose is you have to let him be the boss
it 's almost like flying
what about the trees
the trees are flak -- antiaircraft fire from those geeks on the ground
uh
i 'm shipping out sooner than i thought
i just wanted to be sure you were settled in -- and happy enough considering
are you bored stiff
or can you stick it out for a bit
uh
actually picking apples is as much excitement as i want for a while
i 'm grateful for the job
you 're the one who 's helping me homer
you 're going to give my mom a little peace of mind while i 'm gone
candy too
well sure
that 's good then
all i mean is i 'm lucky i met you
i do n't think so homer
i 'm the lucky one
so
what should i do now
out back there 's a shed
it 's just a mess
if that shed was better organized i could put my truck in there
it 's big enough to keep you out of the war i suppose
ai n't that right
right
stop it homer
they are n't our rules
we did n't write them
i do n't see no reason to read them
okay
cider do n't have no taste till later in october -- it 's too watery now when we 're usin just them early macs and them gravensteins
you do n't get no good cider till you 're pickin them golden delicious and them winter bananas them baldwins and them russerts
what about the worms
most of these apples are the drops -- off the ground right
there have to be worms
of course there 's worms homer
and what is them worms really
they just protein them worms
they is good for you
slow down homer -- don't be in such a big hurry
this is easy -- i'm not hurrying
you still doin' it too fast
i did n't see where you was pickin this mornin homer but you musta worked up a big appetite
you look like you 're serious about gettin to your lunch today
is it true
i think you been stayin up too late at night homer
you 're actually having sex with your own little girl
is that possible
ai n't nobody havin' sex with my little girl homer -- that 's somethin' a father knows
you 're lying
how can you
with your own daughter
homer do n't you know what business you in
you do n't wanna go into no business with me homer -- ain't that right
go on cut my clothes
i 've got other clothes
but she 's your daughter
and i love her
there ai n't nobody else gon na treat her as good as i do
i would n't do nothin' to hurt her homer -- you must know that
please listen to me
both of you
you forget yourself homer
this here 's my daughter
you got your own mess to deal with -- ain't that right
what business is you in homer
mr. rose i 'm in the doctor business
if you want i can help you
you do n't have to go anywhere
i 'm stayin homer
okay
then you can be of use
if that was your knife muddy i wanna thank you for givin it to her-- no girl should be goin' hitch hikin if she do n't got a good knife with her
where 'd she get you
she just plan misunderstand me -- i was tryin to give her my knife i was just reachin to touch her hand
but i understand if she misunderstand me -- it 's all my fault ai n't that right
there 's more than one laceration more than one cut
that 's 'cause i sticked my own knife in the wound -- after she go i sticked my own knife in there
i poked it all around i just tryin to find the same place she got me
let me hear you say that
i so unhappy she runned away that i killed myself-- that what happen here ai n't that right
right
first pregnancy
yes for both
i presume you 'd prefer handling the delivery
all i said was i do n't want to perform abortions
i have no argument with you performing them
you know how to help these women-- how can you not feel obligated to help them when they ca n't get help anywhere else
one it 's illegal
two i did n't ask how to do it -- you just showed me
what else could i have showed you homer
the only thing i can teach you is what i know
in every life you 've got to be of use
there was no visible wound
no
the fetus was dead
her uterus was virtually disintegrating*--my stitches pulled right through the tissue
it looks like scurvy
scurvy
ah yes the curse of the old- time sailor suffering long periods at sea with no fresh fruits or vegetables
homer dorothy is n't a sailor
it 's obviously an aborticide
obviously
christ it 's oil of tansy
i do n't know it
if you take enough of it your intestines lose their ability to absorb vitamin c.
in other words scurvy
good boy
good job
and you call yourself not a doctor
keep an eye on her -- she 's in trouble
he does n't like it
he 's a boy that 's why
ca n't a boy be a dorrit
i do n't think so
you do it then
henceforth you shall be
little wilbur
i 'm not crazy about the little
okay he 's just a wilbur then
we have n't had a wilbur here in a year or so have we
we used to have dozens
i thought you took care of this
it always breaks in the same place
it 's your splice is n't it
it 's your splice
you blame me for everything
i thought it was my turn
it is
i 'll get this
you go ahead
how about expecting people to be responsible enough to control themselves to begin with
how about this child
you expect her to be responsible
it 's just a marvel to me that you still have such high expectations of people
i 'm happy i amuse you
try to look at it this way
what choice does buster have
what are his options
nobody will ever adopt him
try to look at it this way
buster and i are sitting right here beside you
we could have ended up in the incinerator
happy to be alive under any circumstances -- is that your point
doubtless you 'll let me know what immensely worthwhile or at least useful thing it is that you find to do
i was n't intending to leave here in order to be entirely useless -- i expect i 'll find some ways to be of use
in other parts of the world i suppose there are other ways
of course
are you really so stupid that you imagine you 're going to find a more gratifying life
what you 're going to find is people like the poor people who get left here -- only nobody takes care of them as well
and you wo n't be able to take care of them either
there 's no taking care of anybody*-- not out there
you know i 'm grateful for everything you 've done for me
i do n't need your gratitude
what i mean is
i would like it very much if you thought you could be happy here homer
mrs. worthington i feel i 'm very lucky to be here
there 's not a lot of work in the winter and you 'll have to tolerate vernon -- even wally despises him and wally likes everyone
i think wally will be fine mrs. worthington -- he seems indestructible to me
i do n't know
just promise me one thing
uh
sure
just promise me that if there 's a blizzard you 'll move into wally 's room until it 's over
good bye arthur
homer i 'll see you tomorrow
right
do n't mess in this homer if you know what 's good for you
how long 's this been going on muddy
long enough
you ai n't gon na stop it
one please do n't smoke in bed
we heard that one already homer
two please do n't go up to the roof to eat your lunch
thanks guys
i 'd like to go with you
but i 've got to move on
yeah well
you could move on with us man
you could move on somewhere warm
rose rose
pretty ai n't it
you a plumber
do you like to read
i ca n't read
nobody taught me
you ai n't gettin in no trouble i hope
no trouble
i 'm not in trouble
yeah you is
i know when people is in trouble and you is
give men that
i know how to do it
oh i suppose you is a doctor homer
almost
you okay rose
i guess you must like watchin me be sick
i do n't like watching anyone be sick
you 're not yet three months are you
not yet
what do you know about it
i know more than i want to know about it
who 's the father
do n't trouble yourself about it homer -- this ai n't your business
but you do n't look very happy
happy
what are you thinkin
how am i supposed to take care of a baby
i ca n't have a baby
rose please listen
whatever you want to do i can help you
what i mean is if you do n't want to
keep the baby i know a place where you can go
you think daddy 's gon na let me go anywhere
i ai n't going nowhere*.
why do n't you just go back to your pickin homer
i can take care of it myself
rose listen -- don't do anything
you know i mean to yourself
please listen
i bet the view looks better from the worthin'tons
you think so jack
well
i would n't want to be in that wally 's shoes tonight
that just ai n't right jack -- your cigarette 's gon na end up in nine or ten gallons of this batch of cider
that ai n't right
them people drinkin that cider they do n't know there 's a cigarette in there
it 's not that hard to find it in there jack -- it'll take you just a minute
you just got ta go fishin
you mean swimmin'*. i ai n't goin' in that vat to fish out no cigarette
what business is you in jack
just tell me what your business is
do you know him
no
i do n't want to know him
he 's doing missionary work -- in india
i wrote him weeks ago but he 's either too holy or too busy to answer
maybe he got killed in the war
i fail to see how someone courageous enough to make a commitment to a foreign mission is automatically to be dismissed -- that part of the world requires precisely the kind of dedication that is needed here
does it snow in bombay
one winter here and we 'll be shipping him south in a coffin
you ca n't think that a man who has served under such conditions as exist over there will be in the slightest daunted by a little snow*-- have you no idea how harsh and primitive and full of disease that part of the world is
then i suppose we can look forward to catching various diseases from him
i fail to see how a little christianity could hurt anyone here
anyway i was just showing you this guy as an example of what 's available-- i did n't think you 'd be interested
when the plane was hit the crew chief and the radioman jumped close together
the copilot jumped third
all on captain worthington 's orders-- the captain was still flying the plane
none of the men of the ground could see the sky -- that 's how thick the jungle was
they never saw the plane crash -- they never heard it crash
they never saw captain worthington 's parachute either
why was he missing for twenty days
because the crew thought he 'd gone down with the plane
they were hospitalized for almost a week in china before they were flown back to india
it was n't until that they sorted through their gear
then it 's malaria
it 's encephalitis b. he 's recovering at mount lavinia hospital ceylon
uh
captain worthington is paralyzed
waist down
he wo n't walk
no autonomic effects
that 's correct
when will he be home major
four weeks or so right around halloween
you all take care of yourself too homer
we see you next harvest
do n't this place look like home
it look nicer then home
what have you two been doin' to make it look so nice
you pickin nothin' but cider apples peaches -- i hope you understand that
they ai n't drops -- i picked 'em off the tree
then you pickin 'em too fast -- they ai n't no better than drops to me
see that bruise and that one
half of these is bruised
look at this one
it ai n't got no stem
you might as well step on 'em too -- they only good for cider
they 're outrageous them rules
who live here in this cider house peaches
who grind them apples who press that cider who clean up the mess and who just plain live here
just breathin in the vinegar
somebody who do n't live here made them rules
them rules ai n't for us*. we the ones who make up them rules
we makin our own rules every day
ai n't that right homer
where 's your manners
make room for homer so 's he can enjoy the view
what view
what view
well muddy we can look at all these angry stars homer 's been readin to us about
do n't let us make you nervous or nothin'--we know you got ta job to do
yeah we can wait all night for the water to come back on -- you just go on and take your time
it 's that vernon -- he keeps askin where you and homer and rose rose is at
tell that vernon to mind his own business muddy
i told him that you all is sick
tell him what you want muddy--*you is the crew boss today
daddy i 'd like to be in that wally 's shoes every night
you lucky you in your work boots tonight girl
what 's lucky about that
that sounds like you is in trouble already homer
that 's right -- that sounds like trouble to me
we should drown that damn jack in the vat
now now darlin
jack just needs to know what business he 's in
yeah you really showed him daddy-- you just about cut your own hand off and all you cut off him was his clothes
you oughta know you do n't go to jail for cuttin a guy 's clothes*. ai n't that right homer
now now jack -- that just ai n't right
you just stay out of trouble homer
where do you think you 're going
you got ta let me go daddy
please
you ai n't goin' nowhere in the middle of the night girl
i ai n't your business no more daddy
please let me go
you just go inside homer
we do n't need no help
that 's right homer
this ai n't your business
that candy -- she 's the nicest girl i know
she 's about the most beautiful girl i ever seen -- i do n't know if she 's the nicest
you ever see a palm tree homer
he ai n't never been outta maine
but i 'm not that late
you did n't have to give away my seat
i was n't sure if you 'd make it
thanks for playing along
i just have to sit for a while
tough day
brutal day
they say the streets are lined with money down here but i guess you have to know the secret handshake
what are you drinking
uh maker 's mark
rocks
my name 's grant
grant ashby
oh god
i 'm overbearing and rude
lily
lily finn
so what do you do
it 's more like what are n't i doing
my partners and i are trying to secure start up capital for a small tech company
we tried the venture capitalist route in the valley but then again who has n't up there
silicon valley
that 's right
so brainiacs that we are we thought we 'd be innovative and relocate east
try our luck with a straight corporate loan out here
can --
on me
for the seat
cheers
so we 've been meeting with banks all day
it 's amazing how many ways they can say no without ever using the word
well typically corporate loans are relatively simple matters but you do need to demonstrate a capacity for gross fund recovery
do n't tell me you started a tech firm here before us
no no
nothing like that
i work in a bank
really
wish we had met eight hours ago
what do you do over at your bank grant
what do i do
i 'm the vp of finance
here 's where a little research comes in handy
corporate banks give out vp titles like calendars
it 's a small lie but now we 're sure he 's playing
maybe you can help us understand what 's so hard about getting a corporate loan
well typically speaking they 're not
as long as you can demonstrate --
a capacity for gross fund recovery
yeah we got that part
that 's right
and tech firms
they tend to scare people off
they scare people off because most people lack vision
vision and balls
present company excluded of course
banks need to know how they 're going to get their money back
we know exactly how we 're going to make the money back
there in lies the catch-22
i do n't follow
listen what i 'm about to tell you i 'm telling you in confidence okay
have you ever heard of a company called big
com
big
com
that internet thing
right
the guys who started that did what a lot of companies in the valley do
they get a good idea shop it around raise some capital then sell it off to a bigger company
microsoft intel oracle whatever
the beauty of it is they 've pretty much sold the company before they 're even real
the bigger company is already set to buy it all they want to do is make sure that the idea actually works
so they get some start up capital make it work then sell it for like five times the initial loan
sort of like a letter of intent
exactly
but the catch-22 is that you ca n't tell anyone about the offer because if it 's public you could start a bidding war and that 's considered a breach of etiquette
it could kill a deal
but wait too long and you 're not considered hot anymore
and you have this letter of intent
yes
that 's why i wish there were guys willing to take a chance and live a little
we had to finalize the deal
everything looks in order
this has to happen fast
i know
it wo n't go unnoticed
there 'll be red flags
what 's this
you need some convincing
consider it a convincer
let 's just slow down for a second
you 're worried about recouping the loan
i already told you
no i understand that
what i mean
what i 'm trying to say
i was actually wondering about
well my cut
then there it is
ashby gets the itch
the standard ten
ten percent
of how much
two million
same thing with playing a con
you have to be able to see that deep
jake
right
uh huh
uh huh
yeah it 's going through --
and i think it 's because of this redhead
know who i am jake
the anti christ
no
i 'm not the anti christ
or the prince of darkness
i 'm just a guy looking for some answers
things are probably going to end badly for you jake
gee
what makes you say that
your life flashing before your eyes
just the last three weeks
that 's not a bad place to start
grifters
we ca n't all be model citizens such as yourself
it 's all about the money is n't it
is n't it always
i 'm not saying anything
besides you 're one to talk
you 're the one who 's got me on my knees in a dark alley
and these cops
what do they get
keeping the fix happy
you never know when you can use a crooked cop
keep going
i want to know how you got lionel dolby
so you want to know how to play the big con
in this case you might say i want to know how not to play the big con
so how 'd you get caught
suits used to say that in any con sooner or later someone 's going to start asking the right questions
usually it takes a little longer
i can see why you liked her
that was it
we had our crew
now we needed the mark
but there were other factors
factors that were n't clear to me until now
thanks
did you know you should n't light three cigarettes with a match
back in wwi or wwii one of the ww 's if you took the time to light three cigarettes with one match some nazi would be able to figure out where you were
then well
it was the last cigarette you and your two buddies ever had
so three on a match is bad luck
you 're a superstitious fucker
luck 's a funny thing
especially the bad
like what
having a gun pointed at you for one
it 's not like breaking a mirror bad luck but it 's bad
three on a match black cats
believe it
believe it all
she had you tempting fate
my father used to play the same fucking lotto numbers with these other guys in the pharmacy
the same numbers everyday for sixteen years
one day he gets pissed off tells them he 's out and plays his own numbers
they hit the lucky seven for one point two million
is that what it was jake
was it love
you know when the first con was ever played
it was when adam fell for eve in the garden of eden
so much for honor among thieves
you would have cut loose your friends your girl
i was doing it for them
bullshit
you were scared jake
you lost your nerve
you lost your confidence
you were n't being noble
you were n't trying to save anybody but yourself
admit it
it 's not true
yes it is jake
yes it is
they were right there for you
she was right there for you
look at her
we were back on
after you cut her loose
she walked
alrlght alrlght
what happened today
today
started off great
alright
turn around
she does n't get shit unless i get that money
where is it
probably safe in the hands of the federal government
oh jake
you disappoint me
and you just let lily here down again
what was it you said about playing the big con
it 's like putting on a play where everyone knows their part except for the mark
like putting on a play
guess some people forgot their lines
guess so
so why do n't you take a deep breath jake and i 'll count to ten
one
two
three
who 's that
the cash we fleeced off of him was collection money
he was supposed to take that money and give it to the king earlier yesterday like he does every thursday
cept this time he figured he could make a little something for himself off us and still get the king 's money back before any body says boo
what 's a king pin
currently the king pin is a very large type pole stuck up our asses
mob
independent
same shit just independent
they call him the king pin because he looks like that guy from the comic book
big
fat
bald
so what
we hide right
what are you
new
let me tell you how good this guy is
last night al calls this bookie to settle up
apparently he 's been ducking him for like a month
so the guy asks him where he 's got all this money all of a sudden right
what does al do
does he tell him that he cashed in a fucking bar mitzvah bond
does he tell him he 's been giving head out back for twenty bucks a pop
no
he starts going on about this job he just pulled and how he fleeced some wall street asshole type
how he fleeced
you 're pissed we did n't get credit
no that was the only semi fucking smart thing he said
except anybody that 's ever met big al knows that the only thing he 's comfortable doing alone is eating
this guys tells this guy that guy tells some other guy eventually it works it 's way back to someone who works for the king and --
big al gets whacked mid egg foo young
the whole thing took about two and a half hours
that 's how good he is
we sure big al threw him to us
come on
whoa
what
we 're going to give him the money back
fuck that
we 're going too
alright let 's all put our dicks back in our pants for a second
is this the best thing to do
this might just be me but that is hands down the dumbest fucking idea i 've ever heard
people have tried this before jake
it 's never worked
teddy fraiser and his crew went on vacation in chicago for it
last year mumps got pinched in l.a.
the red hair
it 's bad luck
it 's not like she 's a real redhead jake
poor bastard never knew what hit him
jesus i almost felt sorry for the guy
i got ta work off some of this adrenaline
i got a line on this pawn shop guy over in brooklyn
anybody want in
i 'm going home
let 's go jake
moonan
here
shit
so what
we just stay clear of him
that 's it
what are you talking about
we can still do this
jake i mean come on --
shit
i told you use less powder
but you wo n't get that splatter effect
what
i can feel you looking at me
that 's a lot of cash
he came up with it pretty quick
probably some investment banker or convertible bonds broker dickhead
did you see how fast he ran out of here
it 's done
he 's not coming back
i guess
i got ta drop a dime
did anybody mess up the hoop
it can buy you a new and better you
i just do n't know if this says me
what 's the fabric
seems lionel dolby came down with a sudden case of drowning last night
they just pulled him out of the east river
well this is just fucking great
it gets worse
now i know why he was such a good rope
i mean cash
that much and we never had to put him on the send
turns out this ducking moe was an accountant for the king pin
you know what we 're doing with the money
and what about big al
leave him
someone 's going to find him eventually
then they 'll start looking for us too
how much we going after
two million
we only owe the king a hundred and fifty
we get fifty percent
and we get clear of the king
we meet him with corporate papers inquiring about a corporate loan for start up capital
the corporate papers are in order but we need things to happen fast
our guy fudges numbers in the right places moves our papers to the top of the pile or to the bottom depending upon what we need
how 's that
he works for gillette
we pay better
yeah
whatever jake
no not whatever
you 're either in or you 're out
you laugh now but wait until you need a clean place to powder
this is new york city sister
public sanitation does not run very high on the city hall agenda
you know what you can get off a toilet or doorknob
let 's do the list
hepatitis influenza the flesh eating disease --
here 's what 's going to happen
gordo we need to find a guy in gillette 's bank
miles we need papers corporate insurance
she up for this
she 's up for it
she got one leg out from under him
now we had to lean
so then miles walks straight into the creative director 's office and says the code 's fine the program 's for shit and throws down like a thousand pages of code on the guy 's desk
uh
no thanks
i 'm not going all the way to brooklyn for a hundred dollar pay off
you sure
jake --
what do i always tell you guys
do n't spend it all
sooner or later we 're going to run into some bad luck
save some
put it away so when shit like this happens you 're not desperate
that 's it
the gig 's up
so that 's it
that 's it
then he had to bang it out across the street at the bank of the caymens
i 'd like this cashed please
you ever use the bathroom in kennedy
what
no
use the bathroom on the plane
grifter huh
where have you been on the grift
could n't been here long 'cause i would have heard of you skippy
jake
you can call me jake
here and there
here and there scooter
here and there like boston chicago houston
the bay area
some action in london til it turned nickel and dime
or how about that little stint down in miami
heard you actually got into some trouble with the feds down there
you guy 's pretty good
i have a good crew
minus one
minus one
you know back in the day grafting was considered a gentleman 's racket
good suits good food
the underworld of the underworld
a grifter had to survive on his wits his instincts
i like that
i like the idea of that
these days things being what they are guys like me got ta stay low
it 's all take take take
you ca n't just be fucking witty about it
i guess it lacks a certain style
of course your line of work 's only as good as the people you find
you ca n't cheat an honest man
you ca n't cheat an honest man
but a man like lionel dolby
i apologize for the inconvenience
honest mistake
just give me the money back and all will be forgiven
i ca n't do that
why not
let me rephrase -- i wo n't do that
let me repeat -- why not
because you killed one of my crew
buddy that was business
besides you have more crew
then there 's you
i 'll get the money back plus interest
i go on the grift for you
you get a cat i get a cut
and we get square
fucking grifters
i love it
you got balls i 'll give you that much
no
just confidence
i ll be honest with you kid
a grifter comes in here with a fifteen hundred dollar d k fucking n y suit cooler than an eskimo in winter and tells me he wants to grift for me
first thing i have to ask myself is is he playing for me or is he just plain playing me
you tried it once
we got caught
so you know it wo n't happen again
that 's more than you already owe me
what happens if you fuck this up
nothing ventured nothing gained
hey skippy
do i have the word chump tattooed on my forehead
listen scooter --
no you listen
we 're partners now and even though i 'm running the show for you i 'm still running the show
that means i get a little respect
so i do n't want to hear anymore of this scooter buddy junior skippy tiger bullshit
it 's jake
and i got ta tell you for a guy who spends all his time in a gym you could be in better shape
excuse me
i said take off your fucking shirt
look at you you skinny prick
you 're not going to bust out baby oil and start rubbing me down or anything are you
come here
feel this
no thanks
i 'm good
come here
come on
harder
i think i just broke my hand
harder
remember i killed your buddy
what are you talking about
ten 's standard
yeah well sobo 's kid needs braces
do n't get me wrong jake
i like you boys
you guys are the steadiest business in town
but what can i say
twenty percent 's still better than what we give to any of the other criminals
all the shit we pulled with you and you 're trying to shake us down
you guys got sack
was that a threat
did i hear a threat
last i remember we were talking economics then this
what happens next time if we got ta stop and help a little old lady cross the street
well shit
then we got ta pass the call to someone else
oh yeah
moonan
i remember now
thanks
well he 's in town and he sure as shit remembers you
what are we going to do about this jake
we ca n't afford to have a fed onto us
would n't dream of it
i do n't know what you 're into with the king pin but whatever it is we get a piece understand
we get a big piece
if we find out you 're keeping us out i may suddenly develop a conscious and give you up to moonan myself
say something stupid if we got a deal jake
something stupid
good boy
kennedy
international terminal
gordo with a black suitcase
you got moonan under control
do n't worry about moonan
we got him covered
when
it was him
there 's a shipment coming through tonight
kennedy
sorry i --
jake
jake pearson
i go to lawschool with your daughter
carolyn
we met once or twice
of course
jake
nice to see you
well it certainly is a coincidence
here of all places
how is mrs. lewis
great
thank you
what brings you down from boston jake
taking advantage of the long weekend
my wife and i are just taking a little vacation
attractive girl
thank you
actually it 's our first anniversary this weekend
she thinks i 'm here to pick up something for my mother but it 's actually a gift for her
think i 've fooled her
take it from me you never do
but congratulations
nice to be married is n't it
very much so
thank you sir
you know i hope this is n't too much of an inconvenience but if carolyn is coming down for the weekend perhaps i could give you something for her
it 's a check
we split the cost on a few books and i have n't had the chance to pay her back yet
could you
sure
oh jesus
listen to me
we do n't have much time
we can still get through this but you have to keep your head and trust me
what -- what do we do
help me
what about
the money
what about this situation makes you think i can answer that question right now
what is this
you guys cops or something
we 're not cops
that 's not --
you interested in a little work
sorry about your wallet but if you think i 'm going to suck dick over thirty seven dollars a maxed out visa and a bad fake i.d. you 're fucking crazy
jake
take a deep breath and count to ten
it 's not that kind of work
you 're lily right
says who
you 're working daffy 's block
he was going to break your kneecaps
pick- pockets can be so bitchy sometimes
i told him you were with us so that 's two you owe me
we have work
it pays a lot
unless you figure on getting rich lifting wallets while old guys feel you up
oooh
sassy
what do you care who feels me up jake
unless it kinda gotcha going
did it jake
getcha going
alright
hold up
you win
you got the job
gee thanks
now i do n't have to find that bridge to jump off
what about customs
i 'll worry about customs
hey i 'm not just along for the ride so i do n't want to hear any bullshit later about a smaller cut
take a deep breath
you sound like you just broke up with your boyfriend or something
mr. king i think --
hey i got it
take some mental notes
you just might learn something here
what the hell 's his problem
do n't worry about it
it 's just that i left my asshole decoder ring at home so how do i know not to worry
you need to get a haircut
what
and some new clothes
why
we 're going to rope this banker tomorrow and you got ta at least look classy if not be classy
you got ta do this thing and i do n't even know if you can
you 're just going to have to trust me
i do n't trust anyone
then show me how
uh
everything okay
honey this is mr. lewis
carolyn lewis 's father
mr. lewis this is my wife lily
he 's gone
uh huh
i got ta go get a haircut
uh huh
you just put a mother of a jinx on us
lighten up
but the fucking grand poo bah of all jinxes
a bird in your house
you told me to change my hair
what about this
do you have any idea what this means
you 've killed us
we 're dead
did i miss something
you have really soft hands
like a baby 's
do n't ruin this for me
how do you deal with --
what
i said how do -- deal with that
who says you have to know the king to be in a hole
i actually did have a real job once
when i was in high school i worked as a candy striper
sounds respectable
not the way i did it
i was loaded half the time
i do n't know how you could change bedpans sober
i used to hang out with this guy glenn
he was an x ray technician or something
you want to talk about an old boyfriend right now
he was n't my boyfriend
i had a boyfriend at the time
what was his name
anyway glenn was like thirty
i was only fifteen
but he was a nice guy
real sweet
liked to talk
we used to get loaded on pills from the nurses station and then listen to morrisey or some stupid shit like that
yeah the sensitive guy thing never worked for me
we were friends
i trusted him
i should have known it was weird
but then again i was weird
you guys got busted
this is a great neck
no we never got busted
we were done with a shift one night both a couple of percocets down and i was telling glenn about my boyfriend about how we were thinking about doing it you know
i was thinking about letting him be my first because i loved him
what the hell was his name
glenn talked you out of it
sort of
i was telling him about this great love of my life who 's name i do n't remember and i could see
he was getting pissed
i thought it was just because he was worried about me but
he told me that i was stupid because my boyfriend did n't really love me
he was looking out for you
then he grabbed me and threw me down on the floor that really cold linoleum tiled hospital floor and started ripping my uniform off
he said he was going to fuck some sense into me
shit what was that guy 's name
i really liked him
lily
jesus christ
after glenn was finished he gave me a couple of valiums and i went home
the next day i finished my shift and met him around back like we always did
i stuck a number eight scalpel into his chest
three or four times
did uh
did you kill him
i do n't know
i packed up my shit and ran away
to this
so unlike you i guess i do have something to prove in a repressed anger sort of way
you are such a raving pussy sometimes
hey we fucked once honey
that hardly makes you a good judge of character
and do n't think i did n't know you were working some angle with that either
everyone 's working an angle right
there are three people i trust -- him him and a guy who got killed
i do n't know who you are
you 're like some stray dog that wandered into the house
so i 'm telling you to cut loose of this
no one 's looking for you not the king not moonan and not gillette
just go wherever it is you would go
it 's over
what about
what about what
what about the money
so there it is
you got that big itch you need to scratch
it 's all about the fucking money
what do you want an apology
no i want my cut
i 'm going to say this one last time for you so take a deep breath and count to ten
there is no cut
sorry
i did n't know
your friend big al
it should have been you
you got my cell
leave a message
it 's me
it 's jake
listen
it 's happening
gordo 's landing right now
meet me at the euclid
for your cut i mean
it 's
i want you to have it
what do you get lily
finder 's fee
because it is all about the money right
you sold me out
you should have trusted me like i trusted you
you fucked up
you fucked up huge
you tell them the tale
what do you want
an apology
no i want my cut
tick tock
if you wanna help then help
if not shut up
your mess
then shut up
my place
i was supposed to meet him for breakfast
he likes that new ihop they just opened you know
he likes to order that thing
the rutti- tutti fresh and fruity thing they got
miles
sorry
i 'm just
look what they did to him
right in the middle of his egg foo young
it 's bad luck
just an idea but let 's just fucking split
we 'll meet up anywhere
akron or austin or atlanta
anywhere
he 'll find us
we go talk to him
do we want insurance
i 'm just asking
just mail it to the hospital
mr. king please
it 's regarding an accounting problem
yes
correct
i know where it is
that will be fine
thank you
meet me at my place later
how do you know the king 's going to let you walk
i 'm getting a ride
you better hurry
the police will be here any second
i do n't really understand my motivation with this
why am i washing glasses
now you 're an accomplice in a homicide
everything you thought you were in control of just flew out the window or is dripping down your leg
we 're working for the king
wait a second
who 's the mope
no
big con
one rag
one rag and we get out from under all this
but we need another shill
what do we need another shill for
breasts
why
because that 's who the king pin wants us to fleece
and gillette 's perfect
is it all fugasi
no the corporate papers have to be legit
but you got ta score an i.d. a clean one
talk to suits
i got ta get us a banker
what you 're looking for in a mark is someone who 's weakness you can exploit
michelle strigo
loan officer
him
you sure
but if you wanna talk about bad luck
where the hell is she
so this is our boss right
he chases me and miles out of his office and he 's yelling and screaming you 're fired
your whole team 's fired
he starts looking for lily lupus gordo --
but the best part was that he could n't find gordo
he was in the bathroom
so he finally goes in there kicks in a stall door and starts yelling
and there 's gordo pants at the ankles holding a pc world magazine
what do we do
we change the scam
there is no scam
i 've got a fucking sign on my back
i ca n't leave town now and come back with a suitcase full of money
you get it
it 's over
we walk
no no no
not this time
i am doing this for your own good
you guys have got to learn when to stop
you with the armani
you with the hookers
escorts
do you even remember al
do you remember what he looked like sitting there
feeling lucky today miles
found a penny -- heads up
there was an empty cab right outside my building
we hit every green light
and we got rid of the red head
i 'm sorry
nothing under pearson
you 're sure
this is
just a complete disaster
what was it
a ring for my wife
a lot like that one
in fact it was that one
that 's no problem
we have those in stock
thank you
sorry i 'm just a little anxious to give it to her
you take out of state checks
with identification
i understand that but i had my wallet stolen last night
is there any way
i 'm sorry
i know it 's policy but
the thing is
it 's our first anniversary and we 're only in town for the weekend
it 's a very very special night for my wife and i. this ring is my gift to her and i think she 's going to really love it
i can give you phone numbers to call for people who 'll vouch
i can send you i.d. later
i 'm sorry
this is embarrassing
when this is all over you 're going to tell me who the king put on al
you going to have the time
i 'll find the time
king ai n't gon na like this
do n't worry i 'll settle up with your boss
we have n't skipped town yet
what i 'm saying is is that the king ai n't gon na care
see he had a real thing with getting this gillette guy if you ask me i think he 's jealous
of what
they 're both crooks
exactly
cept this gillette guy
he gets to walk around in three piece suits hob knob with the mayor own a bank that kinda shit
meanwhile the king sits holed up in the steam afraid to even take a leak without me or harlin watching the door
my fucking heart bleeds
your buddy
that fat guy
the king could n't wait to have that guy whacked
he did n't even know who the guy was but he was so pissed off at him he gets him drilled
it ai n't personal
it 's business
point lupus
give us a point
point is you do n't go through with this he 's going to go after you next
and he do n't even like you jake
what 'd he say
oh you know
do n't fuck this up
i 'll kill you
i 'll kill your family
i 'll shoot your dog
all the usual
then he said good luck
so that 's it huh
you get the cops to give you a safe ride
let me ask you something
you really think i 'm going to come this close this fucking close and let my guard down
i 'll get square with your boss
i 'll get square with whoever did al
i 'll get square with everybody
then i 'm going going to cash in my chips and be on my way to a new and better me far away from here
you 're a weasel
you really like that bitch do n't you
i got ta tell you i was pretty convinced that the whole thing before was blowing her off for her cut
you know how it is get her to do some shit for you throw her a bang to keep her happy
but if you 're into her
that 's cool
that 's what i like about you lupus
you 're a free thinker
do n't let the king tell you different
egg foo young
stand up
what
stand up
no offense but i 've seen you fight
you got ta be kidding m-
what happened
eee oott auught
sorry
what
he got caught
your boss tried to pull a switch and he got us all fucking pinched
and like in a game of chess you 've played every possible move in your head
you were right
he 's trying to fuck you
you want it you got ta get it at the airport
aces suits
not easy pickin 's
papers like these speak to larger issues
sorry about alfonse
you into something big
pretty much
in over your head
pretty much
can i speak to you in confidence
huh
oh
she 's alright
try and keep up
you ask for the advantage goods then you guys come in looking to be bean traps
so i got ta think you 're either working the mace or playing the jug mob
a little bit of both
hey i been on the ramp all my life so i got no problem with the way you help yourself jake
i saw you go up from the knecker working that grind learning the barnard 's law and i thought the kid 's a prodigy
but i know that if you 're using these goods
so then i figure what 's worth that
you 're either looking for a little history or a retirement fund
who 's the mark
ca n't say
then who 's the banker
the king
ten percent
you guys got sack i 'll give you that much
confidence
it 's just confidence
do you have any idea what those monks charge for that medieval torture
we got a good thing going here
you want to blow it over an overbite
the king huh
nice going
i try
just a tip
what are we gon na do with this stuff anyway
heroin
what the hell do you do with heroin
what
consider him part of your crew
consider him a part of me
coupla things
they got this fed looking around and the girl just split
a fed
is he close
i do n't think so
their fix gave us the heads up and jake 's got a plan that 'll probably keep him off
speak
he 's landing
he 's got a suitcase on wheels
so do half the other people in this place
how do i know which one
i got it figured out
he 's got this thing with bathrooms
if he makes it through customs he 'll be heading for the john
good
good
do not let vig out of your sight
special agent
you are officer richard rottovich
and this would be officer walter sobozinski
i 'm looking for jake vig
like we told you before we think he 's into something with the king pin --
look i 'm not a confrontational person by nature
did he buy it
i think so
what 'd he ever do to you anyway
let 's just say he burned me once
you guys awake
we 're here
who
i 've been looking for this jake vig for some time now
problem is the guy 's the invisible man
a spook a spectre a ghost
then like a gift jake 's good buddy and member of his crew alfonse moorely is found the other day with a hole in his head
do you want to know the first time i had a line on vig
he sent me a birthday card
belated but it 's the thought right
oh this prick 's got a sense of humor
but then again you guys probably know him better than i do
in fact i 've only met the guy once
but now now i have you
the next best thing
his partners
his fix
what do you want
you help me catch him
whatever he 's into next i want you to be into
and what you 're into i 'm into
if it all goes well those two guys from iad will never have to hear this tape
i 'll clear you guys of anything you 've ever done with vig under the guise of some cross- departmental investigation
this prick 's been on the wish list for so long you 'll probably get gold shields out of it
what do you get out of it
peace of mind
that 's it
not everyone 's on the take walter
this guy must have been a real pain in your dick
literally
it 's not a bad deal gentleman
i get peace of mind
you get detective sheilds
but this is the best part walter
walter your daughter will get to keep her braces and have that winning smile
capice
good
i got ta go
so what do you have for me
whaddya mean
we got dick
you guy 's are not working with me here
i just got off the phone with my boss
after he got done ripping me a new lincoln tunnel size asshole he let me know exactly how little i 'm welcome back if we come up short
and now here you guys are wasting my fucking time
he 's headed towards the eastern most exit
do not under any circumstances approach
i want to follow this all the way down to vig
roger that
bullshit it 's cosmetic
my fucking tooth was cracked in half
i made the son of a bitch write it in as a cavity
the department 's dental is for shit
whoa whoa
there he is
you trust this moonan guy
i do n't trust anybody
you see how bad this guy wants vig
it 's like a sickness
i say we collar vig ourselves
we got vig then we got leverage
and we trade vig for that tape
i want to see it right in front of my face
it 's just insurance
that 's what i 'm talking about
i 'm down
what are you doing
high five
put your hand down
i do n't high five
i 'm bella
jack manfred
hi jack
welcome to the cesspit
is it that bad
how do i look
jack
do you need a ride
no
thanks
my car 's in the garage
maybe another time
i 'll take you up on that
goodnight
you 're shaking
it 's the tension
i hate cheats
all men are cheats
but do n't worry i 'm clean as a whistle
i only did s m. no blow jobs
no screwing
why did you quit
i got scared
i can imagine
can you
i 'm happy being a dealer
at least the punters keep their hands to themselves
you called the casino a cesspit
well it is
but i know where i am
ouch
sorry
you fucking little shit
you shopped me
what are you talking about
reynolds got a doctor in
they forced me to take a dope test
it was positive
as you knew
i do n't know anything about it
your boyfriend fucked me smoked my dope then shopped me
what do you think of that
i ca n't get a job now
you bastard
you 're no different from matt
a pair of vicious little shits that 's what you are
look bella i do n't know anything about this
you should talk to matt
you 're all scumbags
what are you laughing at
who was that on the phone
a couple i know are getting married
what kind of deal you looking to
what 's the blue book price
that 's not relevant
an old car like this it depends on the condition
how about fifteen hundred
how about five hundred
what
how about we split the diff
seven fifty
is that your idea of arithmetic
i 'm not a mathematician
i 'm in business
eight fifty
seven fifty
three years two months
march 93
what a memory you 've got
maths always was your strong suit
what happened to the moaning lisa
she went back to south africa
did she
you were pretty thick at one time
we all played the field
jack look next weekend i 'm having a house party
here
it 's near oxford
why do n't you come
it 'll just be social
no business
bring a friend
i 've plenty of room
i 'll try and make it
looking forward
she 's a dab hand with a racquet your friend
south african women are very sporty
i found her in bed with someone
who was he
she
i do n't gamble
do n't be a spoilsport
it 's only a few quid
it 's nothing to do with money
i do n't gamble
last hand
hey
i 've got an idea
why do n't we
i get it
get what
are you accusing me of cheating
good god no
but with skill like that what do you want a job for
you do n't need to work
good night
not particularly
and your lady
she had to leave early
she asked me to thank you
a bit unexpected was n't it
not entirely
how 's that football story corning along
you said it was going to be social giles
no business
i could n't resist them
you mean i wo n't resist them
where did you get it
i. sold the car
you should n't have done that
i know what it meant to you
i owe you for the rent
it 's only a car
i can get another
take it back
till you sell your book
come on marion
let 's face the truth
nobody 's going to publish it
of course they will
you just have to be patient
i 'm betting on you
you 're my prisoner
i 've got something to tell you
i want to hear it
i 've got a job
what job
in a casino
as a croupier
a dealer
how did you land that
it came my way
450 a week
450
what did you do just walked in and said i want to be a croupier
do n't you need training
i had training
in the republic
you were a croupier there
you never told me that
i thought you just knew some gamblers
i start monday week
you sold the car
you got a job
what 's the third thing
tell me
there 's no third thing
do n't be superstitious
i love you jack you know that
are you trying to read my palm
you 've got such beautiful hands
what 's the time
i do n't know
how did it go
fine
you 're shaking
what is it
tension
it 'll go
poor baby
this'll relax you
where 've you been
i 've got to give evidence in court at nine
do n't play the cop with me marion
take that back
fucking take that back
i 'm not a cop any more
i take it back
you 're not a cop any more
you 're a store detective
are you drunk
probably
this fucking job 's getting to you
you have n't written a fucking word since you started
do you have to swear all the time
well that 's my poor upbringing
i did n't go to no private school
i have n't got no class
i want to live with a writer
not a fucking croupier
i do n't even know what the word means
croupier
marion stop this
what do i mean to you
i want to know
tell me
you 're my conscience
have n't you got a conscience of your own
what are you doing here
you know the rules
what about a drink on the way home
i do n't finish till eight
make it nine and you 're on
i 'm on at nine
well that 's our life now is n't it
i do n't like it
why not
i do n't like it at all
you had a wonderful character before the gambler
he was so romantic
he was a loser
this guy 's a croupier
he ca n't lose
people have shat on him all his life
now he 's in control
he 's a winner
is that your idea of a winner
he does n't give a shit about anyone
he uses people and --
-- it 's because of the sex is n't it
you do n't like the sex in it
i do n't give a fuck about the sex
most men'll fuck a lamppost
he 's just a miserable zombie
is that the way you feel now
is that what 's happened to you
marion
it 's a book
oh really
then why is he called jake
why do n't you come clean and call him jack
there 's no hope in it
it 's the truth
without hope there 's no point to anything
now wait a minute
what 's so hopeful about your job
spending the day catching poor people stealing
you said yourself the organised gangs get away with it
at least in the casino everybody gets caught
rich or poor the odds are the same
it 's all relative
crap
it 's not relative
it 's unfair
like your casino
it 's designed unfair
and your croupier 's a little shit because he goes along with it
the door jack
leave it
no
answer it
it 's beautiful
thank you
i hope it brings you luck
it will
that girl she works at the casino --
-- i do n't care about her
of course i was angry
but not with you
the book is yours not mine
i was wrong what i said about it
i hurt you did n't i
you 're entitled to your opinion
it 's none of my business what you write
and your job that 's none of my business either
i love you
and i 've done everything wrong
i 'll leave the casino soon
i promise
you will
within a month
believe me i 'm going to quit
how did you know i was here
i thought you would n't want to spend christmas day alone in here
i do n't want a criminal for a boyfriend
there was a message was n't there
it 's probably easier for you to eat the rice
marion
what did you tell the police
nothing about you
then what
give up being a croupier jack
or i 'll shop you
all you have to do is keep your word
it 's that simple
here
use a spoon
leave me alone marion
you 're already alone
why did you take the money
i hate public transport
what
i want to buy a car
how can anyone be that naive
great
found a job
no
well i 've got something for you
in london i mean
i 've been chatting to some friends
do you know the golden lion casino
it 's in bayswater i believe
they 're looking for a dealer a croupier
do n't be stubborn
the pay wo n't be grand but it 's regular
that 's what you need is n't it
i know you do n't like taking my advice
it 's not that
i 've set this up for you
call the golden lion and ask for mr reynolds he 's the manager
i do n't know him personally but i 've spoken to his boss
do n't say no jacko
give yourself a break
for christ 's sake jacko do n't look a gift horse in the mouth
have you written that name down
reynolds at the golden lion
all right dad
yes i 'll call him
so how are you doing dad
great
i 've just started a new company
solid financing
it 's good
i love you jacko you know that
yes i know that
do n't let yourself down
i wo n't
goodbye dad
oh hello
you know what
i 'd like to buy you a drink
it 's against the rules
dealers are forbidden to talk to punters
that 's stupid
what are the odds of you being seen with me
impossible to calculate
to coincidence
there 's a casino in this hotel
i 'm not much of a gambler really
i just like this bar
so why did you come to my casino
i was at a loose end
a friend of a friend gave me a courtesy membership
first visit to london
no no
i come every couple of years
i always think i 'm going to stay
i 'm from cape town originally
i was born in the transkei on the wild coast
near the casino
in the casino
now there 's a coincidence
my father used to gamble there
your father
i loved the atmosphere
but it destroyed my poor mother
the debts
and the lies
gamblers are born liars
and superstitious too
it 's like witchcraft
that 's africa
there 's an african in all of us is n't there
we all came from africa supposedly
do you believe in astrology
absolutely not
but then i 'm a gemini and geminis do n't believe in astrology
i 'm not married
i wear it to keep the flies off
i must go
let me pay for this
absolutely not
toss you for it
i do n't gamble
how did you hurt your hand
just an accident
nothing
turn left ahead
jani there 's something i want to say
before we get there
i do n't know what the sleeping arrangements are
giles probably expects us to share a room
that 's fine
he does n't gamble
i 'll watch
what happened
remember the guy who cheated at the table
you do n't like cheats do you
which side do you like
you choose
they mean it
who 's they
my creditors
one night around three in the morning they 'll come into the casino
forget it jani
it 'll never work
the point is they want a man inside
and i thought you were a bright woman
just listen
you do n't have to do anything criminal
robbery 's not criminal
you do n't have to be criminal
a man will come up to your table and deliberately cheat
you 'll see him stop him and the guy will make a big scene
there 'll be chaos
and that 's when it 'll happen
you 're serious
you wo n't be committing a crime
the man will cheat you 'll just be doing your job that 's all
and i thought you were only after my body
i 've come to know you
you 're honest
i trust you
what 'll you do when it all goes wrong
it wo n't
but if it does
you keep the ten thousand pounds
what ten thousand pounds
these people will pay you ten thousand before and ten thousand after
they want someone they can be sure of an honest dealer
that 's the point
not all dealers are honest
mr reynolds will never suspect you
reynolds
you 've done your research
next time it 'll be my neck
what about my neck
i want to go back to cape town i want to start again clean
i ca n't do it jani
i 'm asking you as a
friend
you 'd be saving the life of a friend
i want you to forget what i said
wait a minute
no forget it
the bet 's off
how much do you owe
let it go
did they tell you to sleep with me
i told you all bets are off
it does n't seem fair
you 're offering me ten grand in cash but you ca n't afford a decent place
well life 's not fair
we know that
it 's all relative
i need the money too
do you
yes
the date 's not set yet
i 'll call you
one last thing the man you 're going to catch cheating he may get violent
but you know how to deal with cheats
that bruise has cleared up nicely
bruise
oh yes
it 's better
i 've still got mine
and your hand too
i took the bandage off yesterday
would you like a drink
no thank you
i do n't think we should meet again
it 's a shame there are n't more men in the world like you
hello
jack
it 's jani
jani
where are you
sun city
i 've been meaning to call you for months
how are you
great
i 'm getting married
at least i think i am
did you solve your problems
yes
i 'm all over that now
jack hold on a minute
there 's someone here who wants to talk to you
detective inspector ross
who
ross
who did it
tell me
of course i recognised him
you did
i know a cheat when i see one
the man was a cheat
where to
turn left at the lights
where do you live jack
over the river
have you got transport
i 'm going over the river
i 'll give you a lift if you like
thanks
so how do you feel your first night
i 'll bet you 're on a high
nice car
she 's my baby
how long have you worked at the casino
coming up to two years now
but i was away for six months
you 've done pretty well
not bad
i have other interests of course
i 'm off to a little watering hole
why do n't you join me
relax
no thanks matt
i need my eight hours
i 'll lay you five to one you wo n't sleep
in this job you have to unwind
otherwise it 'll kill you
i mean that
some other time
look matt there 's something i have to say to you
i saw you cheating
what the fuck are you talking about
that greek guy who won at the end
you paid him out in 25s not 20s
i do n't cheat jack
you 've got it wrong
i 'm not going to report it
what are you a cop
if i see you do it again i 'll report it
i do n't get you
even if it was true which it is n't what the fuck difference would it make to you
because if a supervisor knew i 'd seen you and i had n't reported it i 'd lose my job as well
and i ca n't afford that
so it 's mr clean
wise up jack this whole business is bent
the casino is nothing but legal theft
and that 's ok
it 's the system
half the punters who come in are using stolen money drug money they have n't earned it
we earn our money
i 'm on your side jack
i do n't need an enemy
you 're talking about complicity
i do n't know what that means
i 'm talking about not rocking the boat
who are these guys
mostly people in the casino business
a few drug dealers
and the girls
just girls
what are you drinking
vodka
straight
on the rocks
good call
help yourself
i 'm off
i need to sleep
loosen up jack
if you do n't this job'll get to you
the pressure 's too much believe me it 'll break you
the world breaks everyone and afterwards many are strong in the broken places
ernest hemingway
i ca n't give you a lift back tonight
do n't worry
rough day
rough life jack
what happened to bella
i 'll tell you later
what
you know what happened to me do n't you
that bitch bella shopped me
i 'd like to beat the shit out of her
i 'd like to buy you a drink
cheers
happy new year
i really like you jacko you 're so fucking straight
hey you have n't changed your clothes
i 'm sorry sir that 's a late bet
what are you talking about
it 's 11 i 've won
with this lady
you 've won with the two chips you placed earlier but the third chip was a late bet
i put them on together
i 'm afraid that 's not so sir
you do n't recognise me
you had me barred
you fucking little worm
wait a minute
you got yourself barred
it was you you shit
david reynolds i 'm the manager here
sit down john
jack
there are three types of casino in the u.k. high volume
small faction
and motr
that 's middle of the road
us
do you have a salon prive
we tried
but there was n't enough business
the punters like company
i have to assume the serial numbers on the bowl and cylinder correspond
we check every four days
why four
and not three or five
it 's the procedure here
now sort the chips
stacks of 20
rows of 5
any exceptions
25 pounds or 25 pence in fours
give me 365
you use two alternating do n't you
we do
where 's the magnet
they 've been tested
have n't you forgotten something
i do n't think so
wipe your hands
not with your own cloth
besides your pockets will be stitched
what happens if i want to sneeze
you wo n't
not without permission
how many aces are left
five
i make it six
five
what makes you so sure
it 's a rule
always stand by your first count
the odds are you 're right
good call
next point
friendships between croupiers inside or outside the casino are discouraged
relationships with females working here are expressly forbidden
we had the same rule at sun city but it was impossible to check
this is n't south africa
we 'd know because someone would report it
believe me someone always does
does know
or does report
what would happen if i knew something like that and did n't report it
we 'd know
there are no secrets in this casino
you 'd be punished
how
first offence verbal warning
second offence written warning
that one 's filed and sometimes copied to the gaming board
my discretion
third offence you 're sacked on the spot
you 'd never work in a casino in this country again
there 's another rule you 're forbidden to talk to or recognise a punter outside the casino
if you see someone who 's gambled here even if it 's just casually on the street you must ignore him
or her
you 're not married are you
girlfriend
yes
she 's not in the gaming business is she
no
this is our crow 's nest
i 'm showing it to you now but you 'll never see it again
very impressive
we have tapes in here that go back six months
let me show you something
you can start monday week
fine
that hair will have to go
fine
i just want the job
jack you 're not the usual type we get here
why do n't you take a break jack
all right mr reynolds
mr tchai always likes to play at that table and only with bella
does he win
he 's a good customer
he 's paying out in stacks of 25
i can see
i have a reduced drive reading of seven thousand
right that checks out here
ninety seven million minus eight corrected to mass critical
i read that with a quantum increase of seven
i 'm getting this flickering light on one of my panels
what flickering light
the one on unit
oh i think it 's gmr twelve zero zero
oh
what 's wrong now
i 'm not sure
i think something is fucked up somewhere in the ship though
i hope it 's not the oven again
yeah
remember when the artificial gravity went out in the toilet
there she is
definite 99%-plus probability that the planet is going to deviate from its normal orbit in another twelve thousand rotations
it 'll spiral in toward its sun and --
eventual supernova
i can tell the damn thing just does n't understand
look bomb
what 's he doin'
i think he 's talking to it
the key
key
key
what is the key
no no the key the key to the fail- safe lock
key
where 's the fail safe key
the key
where is it
what did you do with it
i do n't have it
i do n't know where it is
you must have it you idiot we can stop the bomb
the key goddamit the key
christ twenty seconds christ
where is the key
we 're gon na die boiler
we 're gon na die
what was that i did n't hear
it 's talby
he 's drifting away from the ship without his jetpack
what the hell
yoo hoo bomb
pinback i have a computer reading of nine five seven seven
time to start talking
well
now what
what do you have for us now
boiler
not much
nothing at all in this sector
find me something i do n't care where it is
well i show a 95 probability of sentient life in the horsehead nebula
fuck that shit
well it is kind of a long shot
it 's a goddamn wild goose chase
remember when commander powell found that 99 plus probability of sentient life in the magellanic cloud
well there 's the possibility of
remember what we found
fourteen light years for a fucking mindless vegetable that looked like a limp balloon and went squawk and let a fart when you touched it
remember
all right then
so do n't give me any of that sentient life crap
find me something i can blow up
hey doolittle here 's one
an unstable planet
85 probability of an unstable planet in the veil nebula that will probably go off its orbit and hit a star
sounds good
chart a course for the veil nebula
pinback throw me the chart log
why does n't talby ever eat down here with the rest of us
he just likes it up in the dome that 's all
quantum is up thirty five
i read the same here
rechannel all safety relays --
-- open quantum latches --
armed
well then everything sounds fine
we 'll drop you off in thirty five seconds
good luck
thanks
begin main sequence
mark at 10 9 8- 7 6 5 4 3 2 1-drop
fail safe in lock
four minutes to drop 22 minutes to detonation
this is sergeant pinback calling bomb 20
do you read me bomb
bomb 20 to sergeant pinback
roger i read you continue
one hundred twenty seconds to drop bomb have you checked your platinum euridium energy shielding
energy shielding positive function
do you remember the detonation time
detonation in twenty minutes
right that synchronizes here
okay bomb arm yourself
armed
everything sounds fine bomb
dropping you off in sixty seconds
good luck
thanks
but you ca n't explode in the bomb bay
it 's foolish
you 'll kill us all
there 's no reason for it
i am programmed to detonate in nine minutes
detonation will occur at the programmed time
you wo n't consider another course of action for instance just waiting around awhile so we can disarm you
no
you are false data
huh
therefore i shall ignore you
hello bomb
false data can act only as a distraction
therefore
i shall refuse to perceive you
hey bomb
the only thing which exists is myself
bomb
snap out of it bomb
in the beginning there was darkness and the darkness was without form and void
hey bomb
and i saw that i was alone
well of course i exist
but how do you know you exist
it is intuitively obvious
intuition is no proof
what concrete evidence do you have of your own existence
hmm
well i think therefore i am
that 's good
very good
now then how do you know that anything else exists
my sensory apparatus reveals it to me
right
this is fun
all right now here 's the big question how do you know that the evidence your sensory apparatus reveals to you is correct
what i 'm getting at is this the only experience that is directly available to you is your sensory data
and this data is merely a stream of electrical impulses which stimulate your computing center
in other words all i really know about the outside universe relayed to me through my electrical connections
exactly
why that would mean
i really do n't know what the outside universe is like at all for certain
that 's it
intriguing
i wish i had more time to discuss this matter
why do n't you have more time
because i must detonate in seventy- five seconds
now bomb consider this next question very carefully
what is your one purpose in life
to explode of course
and you can only do it once right
that is correct
and you would n't want to explode on the basis of false data would you
of course not
well then you 've already admitted that you have no real proof of the existence of the outside universe
yes well
so you have no absolute proof that sergeant pinback ordered you to detonate
i recall distinctly the detonation order
my memory is good on matters like these
yes of course you remember it but what you are remembering is merely a series of electrical impulses which you now realize have no necessary connection with outside reality
true but since this is so i have no proof that you are really telling me all this
that 's all beside the point
the concepts are valid wherever they originate
hmmm
so if you detonate in
... nine seconds
... you may be doing so on the basis of false data
i have no proof that it was false data
you have no proof that it was correct data
ah what 'd you say pinback
mafhkin oble groop
ah what was that again i still ca n't hear you
i said i 'm trying to reach talby
something 's wrong with the damn intercom
i need a last minute diameter approximation
i need a ghf reading on the gravity correction
i 'll check it
pinback
yes doolittle
your ghf reading is minus fifteen
doolittle
yes
i need a computer reading on a fail- safe mark
in a second
boiler can you set me up with some temp figures
new star
hey guess what
i got a new star on the readout
which one
another unknown
not on the charts
a red dwarf
any planets
yeah
eight it says here
any of 'em any good
naah
all stable
come on doolittle give it a name
fred
wha
i hereby name this star fred
hey doolittle think we 'll ever find real intelligent life out there
out where
veil nebula
who cares
mark at 5 4 3 2 1-drop
ah negative drop
-- open circuit breakers --
-- remove thrust drive repellant --
-- automatic channels open --
-- remark
5 4 3 2 1-drop drop drop
i 'm coming in now
i 'm down by the emergency air lock
too much trouble to come in the ventral lock
would you blow the seal on the emergency hatch so i can come in
oh sure
hello pinback are you there
yeah doolittle
what 's up
talby was in the air lock
you blew him out of the ship
i 'm going after him
turn on his helmet radio so i can contact him
talby
oh
ah yes doolittle
what is it
i need a diameter approximation
okay doolittle i 'll have it in a minute
ah doolittle i do have a malfunction on this readout but i ca n't seem to pinpoint exactly where it is
do n't worry about it
we 'll find out when it goes bad
i really think i should try and locate it immediately
might be something important
i wish i had my board with me now
even if i could only polish it once in awhile
lieutenant doolittle this is talby
lieutenant
yes talby what is it
sorry to interrupt your lunch sir but i 'm in the computer room and i think i 've located the malfunction
the scanner shows it to be some sort of fault in the communications laser down by the emergency air lock
ca n't pinpoint it exactly but i 'm going down there with a starsuit and try to find it
sounds good talby
let me know if anything important comes up
ah lieutenant doolittle
sir
sh talby do n't bother me now
ah well i think i 've found the malfunction sir
i 'm in the emergency air lock
not now
well i 'm in the emergency air lock and --
doolittle
help me
calm down talby
i 'm coming
doolittle doolittle where are you
here i am
i think i 'm spinning
we 're both falling talby in opposite directions away from each other
my -- my jetpack 's gone
what happened doolittle
bomb must have gone off inside the ship
nothing we can do about it now
hey it looks like
the skipper
he made it
commander powell made it
looks like i 'm headed for the planet talby
going right toward it
when you fall doolittle if there 's anyone down there on the planet somebody may see you
they may see you coming down
what a beautiful way to die
as a falling star
guess you 're right
oh yeah
doolittle
i think it 's the phoenix asteroids
phoenix
it is doolittle it 's the phoenix
they glow with all the colors of the rainbow just like everybody said
no kidding
i 'm going into them i 'm going to hit them
doolittle
yeah
before we get too far away and our signals start to fade i just wanted to tell you
you were my favorite
i really liked you doolittle
i really liked you too talby
hey some debris from the ship
it 's coming right by me
commander
are you still there
oh yes doolittle i 'm thinking
we 're running out of time sir
oh yes
well doolittle if you ca n't get it to drop you 'll have to talk to it
sir
talk to the bomb
i already have sir and pinback is talking to it now
no no doolittle you talk to it
teach it phenomenology doolittle
sir
phenomenology
men
men
what happened men
yeah the skipper always was lucky
who are you
bruno 's girlfriend
oh yeah
yeah
but see tonight wives and girlfriends are n't invited
no
no
cause tonight the girls are here in a more or less professional capacity
all of them work for me and you do n't
let 's go
okay okay
i can explain
you ever have to do something you really do n't want to
how i make my living what 's your point
this
mr. sonrisa saw you on the cameras
he wants you to come see him
i 'm on a break
guess again
no wire
now that that 's out of the way
you want the woman here 's how it works
you pull fifty large out of your mattress or wherever and i make a call to bring her in
or we can work on your face with a pair of pliers for a couple of hours and you tell us where she is
or we could go another way 'cause your boss seems to like my face just the way it is
look that thing about the pliers i was just doing what the man pays me to do
ya know
comin off hard
yeah sure i understand
man you got a bad attitude
i like to keep it professional that 's all
fine
so call her
get her over here
actually that 's not gon na be necessary
what
that 's not why we 're here
what the hell are you talkin about
call her
call the skank now or i start redecorating
you have n't figured this out yet have you
you walk in here thinking you 're gon na cap her then cap me and take the money back to your boss with your tail wagging
but see it 's really the other way around
you think i 'm the whack when actually you 're the whack
see what you do n't know is you 're already in the last two minutes of your life
you 're in the last two seconds you do n't cut the crap
you can hardly blame him the way you 've been taking care of business
or should i say not taking care of it
what 're you talkin about
i 'm hired to do a piece of work my mark goes down and stays down
your 's makes it to the hospital where you then got ta go finish the job
only the cops got the whole thing on video tape
that 's a lotta crap
security camera got you coming outta the stairwell weapon in your hand going to room one oh four and greasing the patient
it 's embarrassing to the professional community is what it is
how come i never hearda you before
i 'm outta portland
sonrisa did n't want local talent
this is what your life 's worth bruno
but the boss knows i always been loyal
he 's got exposure
he sees you starin at fifteen to life there 's a chance you could roll over cop a plea who knows
man 's figured the odds
and he ca n't take a chance
ass like your i can see why he 's worried you 'll punk
what the hell are you doing
who 's camille
none of your business
this wo n't hurt
triple dose of insulin you 'll go into a coma couple minutes you 'll stop breathing and on a busy night the coroner will probably mistake it for an o.d. plus it 's way classier than blowin your brains out
some of us are trying to sleep
you did n't tell me you lived with her
you know each other
how 're ya doin' max
you mean until you showed up
you 're not still pissed
'cause you went out the back door and nailed her girlfriend
who would take offense to that
justine was not an unwilling participant
do you know why i went after justine
she was there
trying to have a relationship with you max is like standing in a fog bank
you know you 're in the middle of something only you have absolutely no idea where you are
and when the fog lifted there 's darren with his head under justine 's skirt
could you give us a moment
why would i be pissed
it was a complicated situation which could have been misconstrued causing you to maybe take offense
i was crazy about you
am crazy about you
but you keep everyone at arm 's length like there 's some great big dark something going on that-- i do n't know
it 's just that the more i tried to get close to you the more you pulled away
i 'm really glad we 're having this conversation
you 're right
i was angry at you
but talking about it-- the scales have fallen from my eyes and i see now that it was all my fault
can you ever forgive me
i see the perimeter defense system is still fully intact
at least i tried
what are you doing here
i live here
guess i do n't have to ask what you 're doing here
you 're roommates
what is it
police drone
it 's a sweep
c'mon
what
where 're we going
but i 'm afraid of--
do n't look down
nobody there to sign for it mon
what 's a bruddah s'posed to do ride around all day with the damn package
so you just decided to return it to the sender
or in this case the sender 's wife
like de prophets say only the unrighteous husband sends expensive gift- wrapped underpants to another woman
which is none of your business
or mine
it concerns only jah
but in this case i was the instrument of the most high
yeah well around here i 'm the most high
from now on before you do anything call in for instructions
what 're you lookin at me for
i 'm not his next of kin
anyway i do n't got that kind of cash lyin around
theo rode for this place a long time man
where 'd you clip this
i did n't
it was a present from a guy
must think you 're pretty special laying this on you
thought so
turned out he wanted me for something else though
same old story
not interested
thought i 'd let you have first crack
later
what 're you looking for
a grand
which means i got ta fence it for two
who 's got that kinda scrilla lying around these being the worst of the times
i ai n't mad at you
i 'll give you seventy five bucks for it
later
i should n't do this
but i got a client lookin to score some fire power
maybe you 'll keep your eyes open for me
i do n't get involved with guns
i 'll make it worth your while
it 's a rule
you 're light a deuce
am i
he 's a mistake i made about six months before you did
but do n't feel bad
justine made the same mistake along with renee jada tia brooke--
yech
what a creep
and for all his cattin around not much of a stick man either
what 's with you
every week this scumbag puts the squeeze on us and every week you roll out the welcome wagon like he 's family
just thought maybe he 'd like a little coffee with his saliva
you did n't
every week
oh my god
in here
in here
shhh
do n't do that
damn
are you alright
they took my daughter
i know
i could n't get to her
it all happened so fast
logan had her and i saw him fall
then peter told me to run
and then he
and i remember so clearly thinking it 's me they want
if i run maybe they 'll come after me
maybe they wo n't think about her
so i ran
your daughter 's the only leverage they have to keep you quiet
can you help me get her back
look i 'd really like to
if i give myself up in exchange for sophy would you make sure she 's okay
we 're not going that route
sonrisa 's not someone you make deals with
what else can we do
like i said-- this is n't my regular line of work so i 'm making it up as i go
look we got ta keep the momentum up here not give her a chance to think
if she hears her kid 's voice
hello
hang on lauren
we 're conferencing in sophy
sophy
are you okay
mommy where are you
do n't worry i 'm coming to get you
when
soon baby
mommy i 'm scared
there 's nothing to be afraid of
everything 's going to be alright
you 're a thief
girl 's got ta make a living
thank god
first time i ever heard that
i was expecting someone else
guess it was n't the pizza delivery guy
you 're lucky
i almost pulled the trigger
i 'm sorry if i caught you at a bad time
we 're just a little tense right now
it 's okay
you have good taste
french 1920 's attributed to chitarus
whoever that is
so what you liked it because it was shiny
no because it 's the egyptian goddess bast
who is
the goddess who comprehends all goddesses eye of ra protector avenger and destroyer giver of life who lives forever
i could keep going
so this guy walks into a bar and says
we did n't get a chance to finish our conversation the other night
original cindy say hi to my good friend--
logan cale
sorry about your window
can we go somewhere and talk
lemme get my coat
the one you 're wearing
like following me around and pestering the people i work with was n't bad enough but breaking into my apartment--
it was open
you got a lotta nerve
me
you 're the one who tried to rip off this piece
completely different situation
i steal things in order to sell them
for money
it 's called commerce
but some stranger sneaking into a girl 's bedroom is
bent
bent
bent
you make it sound i pawed through your priceless collection of underwear
how do i know you did n't
so saw my hands off i left you a present
am i s'posed to be grateful
that would be appropriate yes
how'm i s'posed to ever sleep there again knowing some pervo 's probably touched everything i own
you 're that nervous you 're welcome to stay here
whoa there tex
we 've been through all this
it 's alright peter we 're fine
we are not fine
look if i made you nervous or uncomfortable or creeped you out--
yes on all counts
i 'm sorry
it was n't my intention
but i had to see you
you 'd think a guy who 's taken on the job of saving the world would have a few more important things to do than traipse around after some girl
i have n't been able to get you off my mind
you need to get out more
c'mere i want to show you something
gold leaf art nouveau french early nineteen hundreds
i could probably fence this for three or four grand
no i meant this
expensive gifts surprise late night visits over the top flattery
you always come on this strong
only when i meet someone i have to know everything about
suppose i could help you locate the other ones
the other ones
the other one like you
you lost me
c'mon max
first i watch you dive headfirst out the window fifteen stories up like you 're rocky the flying squirrel
then i found this in your apartment
l triptophane
a neurotransmitter sometimes used in homeopathy to control seizures
then the lightbulb went off
you did go through my stuff
i do n't know what kind of game you 're playing here but i 'm out because you are a whack job
he was working on something called project manticore which was using recombinant dna to produce a superior human
a warrior
an advanced infantry soldier
not that i do n't enjoy a good urban legend now and then but what does any of this have to do with me
the bar code on your neck max
i know who you are and i know who you 're running from
they 've lost track of me and i plan to keep it that way
you 're a soldier max
that 's what you were put here for
but soldiers need a mission otherwise they tear themselves up
that 's deep
but before you lecture me about the meaning of life maybe you oughta get one
ta ta
see you 're back and still rocking the boat
somebody 's got to
i would 've come sooner but
i did n't
how 're you doin'
not in any pain
the good and bad news of a blown out spinal cord
i 'm sorry
my mother used to say the universe is right on schedule
everything happens like it 's supposed to
you believe that
i 've never been much for trying to understand why bad things happen i just know they do
so the job 's to figure out how to deal with the consequences
which you did
you took that sonuvabitch out
well not me personally
on accounta you sonrisa did n't get to buy off the jury or kill the judge
he 's gone
once and for all
it was war max and you won
that 's what soldiers do right
what 's this
open it
it turned up on the black market
one of my sources thought i might be interested
i do n't know what to say
deeds not words
i need your help
forty seven people drowned last night off the coast of vancouver after paying smugglers twenty thousand apiece to get into canada so they could get work in order to eat
only they got marched overboard at gunpoint instead
look thank you for this but--
these girls kidnapped during the last month and sold overseas to the highest bidder
the oldest is twelve
the youngest about the same age you were when you escaped
and i feel real bad about all that but it does n't mean i need to get involved
you are involved
by being alive you 're involved
we 're quoting mom again
maybe we got screwed outta living in a time when we could sit in a cafe sipping our lattes wearing two thousand dollar wrist watches while we plan our next vacation
but the world got a whole lot meaner all of a sudden
was n't s'posed to but it did
and it 's back to the law of the jungle
you got your predators and you got your victims
and you still think you can do something to change that
with your help
civilization as we know it is unraveling before our eyes
but logan and max with a song in their hearts are gon na march into battle to keep that from happening
and whether you want to believe it or not you already fired the first shot
on another matter federal corrections used to keep records on distinguishing marks-- scars tattoos
i did a search and came up with this
that was taken nine years ago
i.d.'d as michael hanover
sentenced to 18 months in the state penn at rawlins wyoming for armed robbery
he escaped from custody after 4 days
has n't been seen or heard from since
zack
he made it
he 's alive
max something
i got no clue where she stays
any idea when she 'll be back
none
i 'll wait
who is it
a friend of your fiance 's
what do you want
to set the record straight about where he was the other night when he said he was working late
who are you
my name 's lydia
and it seems you and i have a lot in common
you said you knew where my fiance was the other night
with me where he 's been after work three sometimes four nights a week for the last two months
we have what you might call an intimate relationship
how do i know you 're telling the truth
he been sleeping in a t shirt lately
that 's so you wo n't see the fingernail marks on his back
bet you did n't know your boyfriend finds a little pain exciting
he did n't either
at first
look i do n't know what you want--
i thought it was important for you to know the facts
and so should you
sketchy told me i could expect a visit from you
i know all about how you threatened him
that if he did n't break it off with me you 'd save him the trouble
oh
well it 's over between you and him
we 're getting married next month
how sweet
standing by your man even after what he did
you 're a very understanding person
big part of loving someone 's being able to forgive them
you 're also a fool
i think you should go now
not before we get something straight you prissy little bitch
i decide when i 'm done with your boyfriend
not him and certainly not you
unless maybe you want to find out just how sharp these nails really are
this is not a place you wanna go
let go of my hand
help
lemme go
no do n't let me go
help
now here 's how it 's gon na be lydia
you 're gon na take your threats and your acrylic nails and you 're gon na go home and figure out your marriage instead of trying to make other people feel as miserable as you do understand
okay okay
say the words i understand
i understand
and if i ever catch you coming near my man again
i asked you to keep that thing outside
you did
you drive away business roarin in like that
yeah does kinda break the elegant atmosphere you got goin' on here
you got a punk ass mouth on you kid
my name 's not kid
it 's client
as in the person who pays for your opulent lifestyle
now you got something for me or not
right here someplace
i got a hit on the car
an oh five tahoe blue with wyoming tags
agt349
it was n't easy 'cause you were off in one of the numbers
sorry i was seven at the time
she was a nurse
she must 've lived near there somewhere near the
the clinic
there must be some registry of nurses or medical technicians or whatever for wyoming
only a last name would be nice
or the nearest town to this
clinic
what about the other kids
you get anything on them
they do n't exactly have a search engine for finding a bunch of kids with bar- codes on their necks which is something i 'm not even going to ask about--
you were gon na run through the law enforcement databases for a match on identifying marks
nothing so far from arrests hospital admissions or coroners
this kind of search
it 's heavy spadework
i 'm gon na need--
more money
like i 'm shocked to hear you say that
as long as you 're okay
i 'll live
regarding your case
i'm afraid i 've come up with some bad news on your fiance
lemme get the file
i do n't know what your story is and i do n't want to
here 's your money
whoever tossed this place wants you
and i 'm looking to stay outta the line of fire
how 's this about me
they lifted my wallet to make it look like a robbery
but there 's a bug in my computer keyboard a tap on the phone and a mike in the light fixture
like you said maybe somebody 's tracking one of your investigations
hardware 's too sophisticated
it 's got ta be the government
and why do i think they 're looking for you
you 're crazy
i 'm you i take that money and get outta town while you can
your fiance has four previous wives
his m.o. is to clean 'em out and take off
which is what you oughta do
bastard
i 'm sorry i could n't come up with something more positive
you and me both
i need a favor
i need you to trace a number for me
sure you wanna be havin' this conversation over the phone
just do it
five seven five oh- eight
now why ca n't i find a girlfriend like that
brings him lunch everyday thoughtful sweet legs from here to there--
straight
shame wastin a girl like that on a guy but what 're you gon na do
craps all over everything and everyone and then wants mommy to forgive him
what guys do
nother order
you 're way more philosophical than i could ever be
i just do n't go in with any expectations
that 's odd
what
tell me the truth
am i a female fog bank
you 're not seriously buying into darren 's nonsense
no
he was just trying to blame you 'cause he 's a slut
yeah
hell yeah
there 's not the slightest grain of truth in anything that idiot was saying
you are a totally down ass female and a straight up friend who happens to be a little
a little what
you know what i 'm saying
if i knew what you were saying i would n't be asking
how long you and me known each other
a long time
long enough for you to pretty much read me like a book right
because you 're probably my closest friend in the whole world
and back at ya
only there 's a part of you that 's
i do n't know--
a fog bank
more like a mystery
which is n't bad
it 's just kinduv
mysterious
got ta go
where
it 's a secret
you 're actually gon na bail sketchy out
yeah 'cause maybe he 's learned his lesson
unlikely
and because he 's my friend
friends do n't help other friends cheat
and because i actually kinda feel sorry for guys sometimes
please
they 're prisoners to their genes
so are dogs
they do n't have a lot of moving parts
only one i can think of
besides think of the drama i 'm sparing natalie
i say hang the bastard out to dry let her see him for the heel he is then maybe she 'll step to the all girl team and let mama licious ease her pain
but of course there 's nothing self- serving in that scenario
yeah i can see to it your winning streak continues
i 'll bet you can
sit
not right now
not right now
okay when
right after you change your wardrobe your personality and drop about thirty pounds
quite a mouth on a girl so young
but my guess is talking is not what it does best
only way you 're ever gon na find out is reincarnation
fact is you are gon na pay me and i am gon na provide you with a service
i actually know how this works
you 're gon na pay me fifty thousand dollars
so how do you get the woman to come to me
i told her it 's just business to you that all you want is a reasonable solution to this
you give her daughter back she agrees to leave the country
i play the guarantor drive her down to mexico tonight and put her on a train to brazil or wherever
and she bought that
i have sincere eyes
make the call
she 's gon na need to know that her little girl 's alright
she 's got my word
she 's gon na want to hear for herself
can you put that in a bag or something
you get it when i get her
okay
idea
compromise right
bruno here comes with me
he holds the money until mommy shows up then we close escrow
what you do with her after i 'm gone does n't keep me awake nights
it 's payday need me to pick up your check
you 're the best maxie
playing hooky again
feel like the dog 's dinner
probably a touch of what 's going around
i know what i got max
they put me back on that drug they 're giving the other vets
only the guy does those cable hacks says the stuff 's no good
do n't believe everything you hear on tv
what if he 's on the level
here 's the dealio on eyes only
he 's probably some wack rich dude sitting around in a trick ass apartment bored stupid
so he gets off on scarin the poop outta folks like you-- i got ta go
tell everybody hey
you can tell 'em yourself tomorrow
catch you back at the wall
later
quitting time
grab a cold one
i got ta meet natalie for dinner
right the big one oh
but i 'll take a rain check
i do n't see how you cheating on natalie involves me
i know what you 're thinking
but the truth is this other person is not someone i 'm in love with
as a matter of fact after what she just did she 's not even someone i like much
so in a technical sense i 'm not sure you could call me and her cheating
officially
do guys actually believe their lame self- serving excuses
max--
or do you think we 're just so grateful to have one of you idiots we 'll look the other way which is arrogant and condescending
lame self serving arrogant
guilty as charged
you left out condescending
but there 's another side--
here it comes
the part where the guy turns everything around
i 'm the victim here
really
hear me out
this person i 've been seeing is a jam pony client who happens to be married--
and you were a sympathetic ear
exactly
then a sympathetic mouth then a sympathetic--
she had me followed the other day and found out about natalie
now this person 's demanding i blow her off or she 'll do it for me by telling nat about us
does this person have a name
lydia
and lydia telling natalie the truth makes you a victim in what way
i 'm a toy to her
a toy
she 's as much as said so
but she does n't want to share her toy with anyone else
it 's just an ego thing with her
fight fire with fire
threaten to go to her husband
who either does n't care or could have me killed
either way natalie 's still gon na find out
what happens if you level with her
even if she does n't dump me which is unlikely she 'd never be able to trust me again
and why should she
look max i made a terrible mistake
one i 'll never ever make again
natalie and i are soulmates
i know that now
she 's the woman i want to spend the rest of my life with
i guess it took the thought of losing her for me to understand that
so you 're straight on how this is gon na go down
you set up on lydia
when she 's on her way over to the apartment you give me the heads up
i answer the door and pretend to be natalie
she tells you how i 've been--
--a philandering pig
but you explain that you 're a compassionate and understanding person who can find it in your heart to forgive me
or i dissolve into an angry hysterical wreck who never wants to see your lying ass again which is probably what would really happen
i just do n't want natalie to ever find out
she deserves better
how 'd you get her out of town
convinced her she needed to visit her mom in san mateo
and we 're sure lydia 's gon na make her move
she came by the apartment once already
fortunately i 'd disconnected the doorbell as a precaution
lydia 's not gon na back off until she gets her pound of flesh
i 'll give it my best shot
max what did i do to deserve a friend like you
you do n't
you rock max
you
rock
easy sketchy
no i 'm serious
that psycho got exactly what she deserved
yes
lydia may not have been one of humanity 's finer specimens but--
she 's toxic
monster in bed but toxic
you would be making a mistake to come away from this thinking she 's the villain in the piece
you are
she was the one--
none of this would 've happened if you had exercised even a smidgen of good judgement or self restraint which you did n't
true but--
you were trying to have it both ways and you were being completely selfish
and if i ever find out you 're going out the back door on natalie again you 're the one who 's gon na be hanging by your ankles three stories up
understand
okay okay okay--
say the words i understand
that was extreme
did you see that one guy--
shut up
this is a hot run
beat it
you 're late
i was on call
i want you on call here
what 's the difference if i 'm on call here or deployed in the field
more like deployed in bed asleep
i do n't sleep
theo asked me to pick up his check
and theo ca n't pick up his own check because
he 's sick
for a change
how 'bout you do n't break my sneakers on this
the guy is seriously not well
you tell theo he 's not in tomorrow he can start looking for another job
i do n't know how to break this to you normal we 're all looking for another job
fourteen thirteen market
get a signature then take it to this address
by the way that guy who was in here sniffing after you yesterday called twice already
tell him i took the day off 'cause i was n't feeling so hot
what about this
i 'm taking the rest of the day off 'cause i 'm not feeling so hot
what the hell is that
gin
whoa
some of this hard liquor 's a tad too manly for me
i 'm a brewski man myself
better ease up then hawk
would n't want to give you whiskey dick would we
who 's whiskey dick
well
obviously no one you have to worry about
woody
my name 's not woody it 's haw haw
well amanda this has been quite a night
so far you 've seen me and my dick throw up
what 's next
projectile diarrhea
man
what a stud huh
believe it or not you still have a way to go before you start competing with my soon to be ex husband
the champion of lousy lovemaking
the man who thinks he 's the biggest and the best
the man who thinks every secretary stewardess and cocktail waitress he fucks should lick his feet for the honor
the man for whom faking it was invented
christ if i had n't gotten pregnant with our son i would have never known i even had sex with the prick
you love him
i just told you he 's a big hairy
no i mean
you love your son
more than anything in the world
and he loves you back does n't he
he 's a little spoiled but i know he does
well shame on him if he does n't
amanda as ironic as this is gon na sound i ca n't take any money for
i 'm no midnight cowboy y'know
it would only cheapen the whole deal for me
i 'm not paying you for the lovemaking hawk
i just want you to have whatever you needed the money for when you took me up on my offer
you 're a little scrawny but thanks to the concert we 're low on amateurs
name
hawk
pick a song hawk
got any kiss
you kidding
this is detroit
drink
yeah a man 's drink
what 's that
you mean you never seen a jack daniels on the rocks before
sure i have
but not one with ice in it that 's all
save your money stud muffin
the lady at the end of the bar sends her love
no problem
thanks
sorry
it 's okay
jeremiah
yeah
beth
i ca n't believe it
believe it
i did n't mean for that to be so
intense
forgive me
i do n't care
i wanna hear more
i 've loved you ever since i first laid eyes on you jeremiah
i 've just always been too scared to show it
beth i ca n't believe you just said that because that 's exactly how i 've always felt about you
call me jam
it 's my band name
you do n't know how long i 've been waiting to hear that
jam
we 've got to take this slow
right slow
oh screw it
so
is it true that gene simmons had a cow 's tongue grafted onto his real one
y'know to make it so long
i dunno
i think he had the piece of skin under his tongue removed so he could stick it out farther
i 'm not too up on gene trivia
your man is the drummer peter criss right
peter criss is my inspiration man
if i paid a hundred bucks for a kiss show and all i saw was his solo i 'd consider it
money
hey how 'd you know that
i have all your notebook doodles memorized jam
here
i feel like such an idiot
why did n't i just say something a year and a half ago
man think of how much time we wasted
let 's not think about the past
let 's just think about from today on
i 'll never forget you jam
tell me about it
church will never be the same again
coming dad
i 'll call you
soon as we get a phone
bye
bye
oh great
i just hitched a ride with a bunch of potheads
i 'm hooking up with some people at this funky place in downtown detroit called disco inferno
mind droppin me there
what 's it worth to you
what the hell is that supposed to mean
so are you like gon na polish our nobs or what
what
that 's disgusting
tease
what the hell did i do to tease you mongoloids
you got in the car did n't you
oh god how calculating of me to lead you all on like that after you offered me a ride in the middle of nowhere
whatever
stella
what are you high
yeah
for once lex is right
it 's over
things ca n't get any worse from here
wonder if you could smoke shit out of this
maybe some tunage'll chase those blues away
this is the best thing that ever happened to me at school
not only are we on again for kiss in detroit but we 're actually sitting right at the fifty yard line
i dare you dudes to find a curlier scenario
stan lee could n't think of a better one
i 'm starvin and it 's way past lunchtime
totally
all i 've had for chow was a packet of pop rocks and a yoo hoo
let 's stop in sandusky hawk
what 's in sandusky
pizza and i been jones in for a pizza ever since we left st. bernard 's
you call that john travolta denny terio shit dancing
i would n't dance like that in private if you paid me
disco blows dogs for quarters
what was that d.j. 's name again
oh i 'll remember it till the day i die
his name was
simpleton the simian
no samson samoan
no simply similar
i have one question
how could a kid who wails on the drums like it 's the only thing keeping him alive even think of such a femmy thing to say
really jam you tryin to make us barf
so maybe we got enough for one ticket
fuck
waitaminit dudes
i got it
we find four really small kids beat the shit outta them and steal their tickets
what do you think
brilliance trip
sheer brilliance
give albert einstein here the nobel prize
... at twenty thirty hours
one more time in english
for the next hour and a half it 's every dude for himself
try to get at least one ticket and at 8:30 p.m. we 'll meet over there
any luck
plenty but it was all bad
yeah she gives you shit and you take it
okay enough
enough
gimme the tickets
i wanna hold onto them
second floor girls john
two minutes
he 'll never look there
check
that 's sherry vanhafton
i 've been in love with her since the second grade
whoa
she just farted
i have never heard a girl squeeze cheese in my entire life
weird
too bad we 're stuck in electronics or
never mind with the too bad shit
i got a crazy plan but only the craziest among us can pull it off
but
but st. bernard 's is way the hell over in the next county
so
your mom 's car has a cb radar detector and cruise control check
we are not stealing my mom 's car
damn straight we are
hawk all i need is one ding on the volvo and presto
there are my balls hanging from the rearview mirror after she gets back from cincinnati
and when is she due back from that groinecologist 's convention anyway
sunday but
then lighten up
she 'll never know we touched it
alright here 's the plan
we bus it to chez lex grab the volvo bail jam the hell outta st. bernard 's and arrive at the train station precisely on time for the 2:45 to detroit
there 's only so much trouble an individual can get into till it just does n't matter anymore lex
you familiar with a condition known as absolute zero
the hypothetical temperature characterized by the absence of heat and even the slightest amount of molecular activity
yeah i 'm vaguely familiar
well jam is in absolute trouble
he could n't get any deeper into shit if he was a fly sitting in a horse 's ass
you know as well as me he 'd give his right arm just to see peter criss 's drum solo never mind a whole kiss concert check
very funny hawk
okay i 'm in on this hare brained scheme but if anything happens to my mom 's car i 'm blaming you
i 'll say you drugged me or something
curly
we got you a change of duds when we picked up the car
next stop the 2:45 to detroit rock city
jeezis hawk can you at least keep it within twenty miles of the speed limit
lex am i gon na have to lock you in the trunk till we reach detroit
do n't worry these babies are built for speed
what the fuck
the paint
uh
dudes
now there 's a woman who totally abuses the privilege of motherhood
dudes
here 's a suggestion
let 's stop worrying about the concert for the time being and get the cops in on this volvo situation
wake up lex
this is detroit
the cops are n't gon na waste city dollars looking for a swedish car
face it the volvo 's on a cutting board as we speak getting sliced diced and julienned by christine the chop shop gourmet
now listen up
here 's the game plan
... i mean my mom 's got insurance
what 's the worst thing she could do
ground me for the entire year
i can handle that
cool bro now listen up
... holy shit
i am in absolute trouble
i never should have let you drive man
absolute fuckin trouble
okay shut the fuck up lex
now then step number one we find us a scalper
i got
twenty five
i think we should try sneaking in
four dudes sneaking in
we 'd get busted fer sure
bad plan
okay one of us sneaks in gets four ticket stubs off some kids in the audience comes back out and we all re enter the concerto
voila
still too risky for my money
we 're running out of time here
this is kiss
a victory for one is a victory for the team
i 'm sure i can barter with a scalper but if you dudes think you got better plans go for it
we 'll reconvene at that intersection
i found the volvo
tickets
could be
and if it ai n't cleaned off
are you gettin wise with me
no i 'm dumber than a goddamn slug
now can i please clean your windshield and leave without further ado
well let 's recap shall we
you slapped all of us yelled at me used my head for a rag threw me on the ground and tossed our love gun 8- track under the wheels of a passing semi
so if the lesson was that you 're a dick with ears and a really bad haircut then yes
i 'd say we learned it
excuse me i 'm a little deef a- hearin
can you repeat yourself
okay
ahem
you
are
a. dick
with
ears
and
a. really
bad
haircut
oh yeah
how would you like a nice hawaiian punch
sure
dude this is all i got
sorry man no can do
but i 'll be here for a while if you scare up the extra gravy
where the hell am i gon na scare up that kinda gravy in one hour
the easy way
you look a little scrawny but it 's worth a shot
i ca n't just walk in and take my clothes off
it 's embarrasskin
guess you do n't want to see the greatest show on earth
and in detroit no less
well take care chief
dude if it were dancing the way fred astaire did it i 'd give it my best shot
i 'd learn the steps and practice in my spare time
but this
tribal ritualistic bullshit it 's way too spontaneous for me
yeah you 're probably too young anyhow
hey i invented fake i.d.s alright
that 's not the problem
they 're playing disco music in there man
chief here 's a little secret
drink heavily your feet will know what to do
now shit or get off the pot
do you wanna dance or do you wanna see kiss only on their album covers
jam listen up
hawk
just listen up man cause we are in a quandary
they 're still at my house in trip 's jacket
they 're what
she was standing right over me when i was changing for fuck 's sake
do n't worry about it
they 're perfectly safe
we can pick them up after school
my mom wo n't be home
it 's no problem
all right
after school we double- time it to your house for the tix before heading to the train station for the 2:45 to detroit rock city
check
if he offers you a slice you 're not the least bit hungry check
check
do n't you think we should at least pull over and offer to clean it off
what
are you mentally deranged jam
oh no jam
i 'm not falling for that twice
well could n't you slow down so i can at least state my case hawk
if you do n't like it you can speed up and i 'll never mention it again
it does n't mean anything
do n't pay attention to him
disco inferno
disco 's infernal morelike
hey look at the front entrance
a car 's pulling out
the parking space from heaven
god is surely smiling down upon us tonight dudes
kind of funny i thought he 'd be pissed as hell at me
oh i 'm sorry trip
what you made was a big brainless pile of horse shit
no offense
guys guys
come on if this is anyone 's fault it 's mine
i was the one who grabbed trip 's jacket by mistake
it 's my fault and i apologize
please jam we 're trying to vent some hostility here
sure the whole thing may be your fault but who 's gon na get pissed off at you
i got
uh uh
do n't tell us jam
just show us
wait
i know how we can get in
jam shut up
you 're not allowed to speak remember
go use whatever femmy idea you have to get yourself a ticket or four
i do n't wanna hear it
but
my plan involves all four of us acting together
see you at 8:30 jam
later
dudes
later
well
i still got my idea if anybody will let me speak
go ahead jam
we all beat each other up then once we 're nice and bruised we run over to the ticket takers and say we got mugged and our tickets were stolen
they got ta let us in then
oh hi mom
now
jeremiah what are you doing
uhh
nothing
ahh sunshine
you 're going to be late if you do n't hurry up and change soon
change
what 's wrong with what i got on
it 's dirty laundry for one thing and for another you still have n't worn the clothes i bought you
you 're skating on thin ice already young man so i would n't push my luck
now get out of those rags
but mom
besides those jeans are so tight i can see your penis
they 're not idiots
now do n't forget you 're on the honor system tonight
i 'll be home a little after one and if you 've been partying or playing that satanic kiss music
well need i remind you of the consequences
grounded for the rest of the year
you 're a smart boy jeremiah
and so handsome
i made an appointment with father phillip mcnulty at st. bernard 's
we 're to see him directly where he will register you on the spot
you mean you 're sending me to
b- b boarding school
what else can i do
oh records and magazines and comic books are one thing but tickets
tickets
jeremiah do you realize what this means
that you 're no longer content merely hearing their awful songs or looking at photos of their horrific faces
now you want to see the devil in the flesh
you want to reach out and touch pure evil
and in detroit no less
jeremiah
what 's gotten into you
i just lost my virginity in a confessional booth
lord have mercy
forgive me father for i have sinned
this is my first confession in
well
a really long time
prepare to receive the act of penance
how many sins have you committed since your last confession
just one father but boy was it a doozy
so you see if it was n't for me me and my friends would be at that kiss concert right now
together
that 's it
yeah
well this is a unique confession to say the least son
and not exactly the most interesting one i 've ever heard either
you sure you do n't want to talk about
oh carnal knowledge with a neighborhood girl or impure thoughts about the new student teacher maybe
or how about finding a box of magazines under your dad 's bed
no
well then i suggest you have a seat on the bench behind you and think of something a little juicier to confess than losing kiss tickets
i realize this is detroit but i personally find what that rock and roll band is all about to be boring as lucifer 's kingdom
i 'll return in a little while
okay you better have something really sinful for me this time son
my patience is worn to threads and your mom will be here any minute
alright father here it is
about two weeks ago i went to my cousin 's wedding and one of the bridesmaids asked me if i wanted to take a bath
no
i was insulted so i asked her if i was wreaking some wicked b.o
right
then she said no she wanted to take a bath with me
oh this is terrible
please go on
well she was a very tempting siren father
built like you would n't believe
so i gave into temptation about a block away from the wedding reception at this little motel that charges by the hour
well
continue
continue
okay
when she peeled off that gown you 'll never guess what she was wearing underneath
was it a teddy
no
much bet
i mean much more sinful than that
a bustier
tell you what
you keep guessing and i 'll say something when you get it
splendid
i love a good game of name that nightie
jam has yet to do an overnight with us
i had a nightmare once that something like this might happen
i hope he does n't get grounded again
if he misses peter criss 's drum solo i do n't know if he 'll be able to handle it
trip you fuckin asshole
what
yeah right
she wishes
look at that big ass
you know what they say about a big ass
big shit
that 's some sick shit right there
did she comb your ass hair for you too
if your mom so much as smells those tickets they 're history and we get screwed outta seeing kiss for the third year in a row the third year
i knew it
i knew this was gon na happen
i had a bad feeling since last night
remember
we are so totally fucked
waitaminit dudes
i got it
maybe we can glue the tickets back together
hey take it easy man
this is the girls crapper remember
wake up lex
we just watched jam 's mom torch our fuckin kiss tickets
not reo speedwagon
not journey
not the bay city rollers
kiss
if you can think of a better reason to trash a bathroom i 'd sure like to hear it
trip it 's not the end of the world okay
quit acting all squeezed out
oh everything 's hunky dory now that the shit hit the fan just like you said it would you snug sonofabitch
you fuckin jinxed us
smug trip
not snug smug
i did it
i did it
we won
we won
the chinese have a proverb that which appears too good to be true usually is
there 's got ta be a catch
yeah
i have a saying too lex
it goes catch my jizz in your mouth and stop jinxing us asshole
we 're going this time and that 's all there is to it
well here we are back at fucking school again
huh
st. bernard 's
figures it 's named after a canine
eyowch
this is one hot pizza
trip huck that out before it stains the upholstery
man that weed knocked christine on her ass
she 's sleeping like a baby stella
let 's lift up her shirt
really trip can we bore holes in your head and use it as a bong so it actually does us some good for a change
fuck you lex
this whole thing would n't have happened if it was n't for you jinxing us
i just made an honest mistake
it 's gone
i can see that bright boy
what happened to it
but we took the keys
damn she musta hot wired it
we picked up a professional car thief in the shape of olivia newton john
okay i 'm just a little mad now
jam why 'd you talk us into picking that bitch up in the first place
twenty five more'n i got
all i got is five
the rest is in the volvo
please sir do n't beat me up
i do have a kiss ticket but not on me
a likely story
hand it over kid
no really
my brother 's hanging onto it for safe keeping
please let me get him for you
two hundred bucks
you heard me nad breath
my time 's precious and i think that 's a reasonable price to pay for your sorry life
look i want to live but i do n't know where the fuck i 'm gon na find two hundred bucks
oh yeah
you and what army
the kiss army
gimme your gun boy
no you gimme your gun boy
do n't tempt me i 'll shoot
not if i shoot first
i do n't even think you have a gun
neither do i
simple simon on the rock go caller
hello
is this me
i 'm trip
am i on the air
i should hang up on you right now but you 're the right caller so answer quick or get your battleship sunk
what are the names of the four members of kiss
gene klein stanley eisen paul frehley and peter
criscula
yeah that 's it
is that your final answer
yeah
trip
you just got yourself four tickets and four backstage passes to kiss live at cobo hall tonight
i did
yeah you did
yeeeehaaawww
this is totally fuckin curly man
thank you god
whoa easy trip this is radio not taxi driver
now listen up cause this next part is crucial
stay on the line so we can get your full name information and
good morning mongrels
good morning
that 's all the gusta you can musta
i said good morning
good morning
now that 's better
but i still sense some students out there
who are afraid
just to say good morning
good morning
are you afraid
good morning
now that 's what i like to hear
because too many young men and women today are paralysed by their fears
they give in to their feelings of self doubt
they surrender their bodies to the temptations of drugs alcohol and premarital sex
empty solutions
these are toxic chemicals
and disease spreading behaviour
hi
what 's going on here
horrible accident
my neighbour
he got killed
what happened
he got smooshed
by a jet engine
dr. monnitoff
donnie
i know that this is gon na sound kinda weird
but do you know anything about time travel
so
according to hawking
wormholes might be able to provide a short cut for jumping between two distant regions of space time
so
in order to travel back in time you 'd have to have a big spaceship or something that can travel faster than the speed of light --
theoretically
-- and be able to find one of these wormholes
a wormhole with an einstein rosen bridge which is theoretically
a wormhole in space controlled by man
so
that 's it
the basic principles of time travel are there
so you have the vessel and the portal
and the vessel can be anything
most likely a spacecraft
like a delorean
a metal craft of any kind
what effect do you think this would have on an infant
well
the thing is nobody remembers their infancy
and anyone who says they do is lying
we think that this would help develop memory earlier in life
did you stop and think that maybe infants need darkness
that darkness is part of their natural development
each vessel travels along a vector path through space time
along its centre of gravity
like a spear
beg pardon
like a spear that comes out of your stomach
uhh
sure
and in order for the vessel to travel through time it must find the portal in this case the wormhole or some unforeseen portal that lies undiscovered
could these wormholes appear in nature
that
is highly unlikely
you 're talking about an act of god
if god controls time
then all time is pre decided
then every living thing travels along a set path
i 'm not following you
if you could see your path or channel growing out of your stomach you could see into the future
and that 's a form of time travel right
you are contradicting yourself donnie
if we could see our destines manifest themselves visually
then we would be given the choice to betray our chosen destinies
the very fact that this choice exists
would mean that all pre formed destiny would end
not if you chose to stay within god 's channel
donnie i 'm afraid i ca n't continue this conversation
i could lose my job
when can i squeeze one out
not until like
eighth grade
why do i have to sleep with donnie
he stinks
when you fall asleep tonight i 'm gon na fart in your face
i 'm telling mom
what happens if you tell mom and dad about this samantha
you 'll put ariel in the garbage disposal
dea ex machina
what did you say
our saviour
how can you do that
i can do anything i want
and so can you
why did you make me flood the school
we just want to guide you in the right direction
who is
we
you 'll know soon enough
where did you come from
do you believe in time travel donnie
i want to show you something
you have to do something for me first
you have a request
yeah
tell me why you 're wearing that stupid bunny suit
why are you wearing that stupid man suit
take it off
i want to see you
what happened to your eye
i am so sorry
why do they call you frank
it is the name of my father
and his father before me
how much longer is this gon na last
you should already know that
watch the movie donnie
i have something to show you
darko cheats death
man
you 're famous
i called you like a jillion times last night
we went to a hotel
my dad said he found you on the golf course
are you sleepwalking again
i do n't wanna talk about it
how old is grandma death
a hundred and one i think
every day she does the same thing
but there 's never any mail
what 'd you do donnie
what 'd you do
go home
go home and tell your parents that everything is going to be just fine
do n't look so freaked
i 'm not
but you should check your backpack 'cause those guys like to steal shit
fuck them
so
you just moved here
yeah
my parents got divorced
my mom has a restraining order against my stepdad
he has
emotional problems
oh i
have those too
what kind of problems does your dad have
he stabbed my mom four times in the chest
wow
did he go to jail
he fled
they still ca n't find him
my mom and i had to change our names and stuff
i thought gretchen sounded kind of cool
i 'm sorry
i was in jail once
i accidentally burned down this house
it was abandoned
i got held back in school again
ca n't drive until i 'm eighteen
i think when i grow up i want to be a painter
or maybe a writer or maybe both
then i 'll write a book and draw the illustrations like a comic book
you know change things
donnie darko is a cool name
sounds like a superhero
what makes you think i 'm not
i should go
for physics
monnitoff says i have to write an essay on the greatest invention ever to benefit mankind
that 's easy
antiseptics
i mean the whole sanitation thing
joseph lister
1895
before antiseptics there was no sanitation especially in medicine
you mean soap
do n't knock soap
without it disease would spread rapidly
if we ran out
you and i would never live to see the year 2000
wonder where we 'll be then
the best thing about soap is that it 's the only thing on earth that can never get dirty
no matter what crap you throw on it
it always rubs off
and there it is again
perfect
until it withers away
it 's a good thing the school was flooded today
why is that
we never would have had this conversation
you 're weird
i 'm sorry
that was a compliment
will you go with me
where are we going
no
i mean will you go with me
that 's like
what they call it here
going together
sure
where are you going
i 'm going home
donnie
yeah
do you ever feel as though there 's always someone watching you
why
well
maybe someone is like
giving you these dream steroids
and sleepwalking
is someone showing you the way
what happened to your neck
i do n't want to talk about it
so what happened to your neck
babies cry because they 're afraid of the dark
and because they have no memories
for all they know
every night could be the last forever
like perpetual darkness
why not just buy your baby a night light
that 's not good enough
you 've got to go back in time and take all those hours of darkness and pain and replace them
with whatever you wanted
with like images
like
a hawaiian sunset
the grand canyon
things that remind you how beautiful the world can be
you know
we 've been going together for a week and a half
and what
well
you want to kiss me
that 's alright
i understand
no
donnie wait
i 've never
i always wanted it to be at a time when
when it reminds you how beautiful the world can be
yeah
and right now there 's some fat guy over there watching us
we 're moving through time
what
they suspended me for two days
are you okay
i 've been seeing stuff
a lot of really messed up stuff
do you know who grandma death is
who
the old crazy woman who lives off old gun road
oh yeah
the philosophy of time travel
what is this
she wrote it
there are chapters in this book that describe the stuff i 've been seeing
it ca n't just be a coincidence
will you come see her with me
what
how long was i asleep
the whole movie
let 's go
you want to skip fourth period and go to the ridge
what 's wrong with you
what do you mean
will you please talk to me
not now donnie
it is n't a good time
then when
i have to talk to you
hey
hey
you ok
my mom is gone
where is she
i do n't know
she did n't leave a note
the house is all messed up
but you 're ok
did you call the cops
yeah they told me to get out of the house
i 'm so scared
i just keep thinking that something awful has happened
it 's my fucking stepdad
i know it
it 's safe here
what
there 's something you have to know gretchen
everything is going to be just fine
come with me
where are we going
i 'm sorry ms. farmer i just do n't get this
just place an x in the appropriate place on the lifeline
i just do n't get this
everything ca n't be lumped into two categories
that 's too simple
the lifeline is divided that way
well life is n't that simple
so what if ling ling kept the cash and returned the wallet
that has nothing to do with either fear or love
fear and love are the deepest of human emotions
well yeah
ok but you 're not listening to me
there are other things that need to be taken into account here
like the whole spectrum of human emotion
you 're just lumping everything into these two categories
and like denying everything else
people are n't that simple
if you do n't complete the assignment you 'll get a zero for the day
will you still be working at yarn barn
'cause that 's a great place to raise children
no a year of partying is enough
she 'll be going to harvard this fall
you 're such a fuck ass
when did you stop taking your medication
oh please tell me elizabeth how exactly does one suck a fuck
we will not have this kind of language at the dinner table
i wish i knew where you went at night
did you toilet paper the johnson 's house
i stopped rolling houses in the sixth grade mom
get out of my room
you know
it would be nice to look at you some time
and see my son
i do n't recognise this person today
then why do n't you start taking the goddamn pills
grandma death
that is a terrible nickname
he ca n't samantha
he 's been suspended from after school activities
donnie
are you still with us
how was your therapy session tonight
fine
you know dr. thurman is n't so bad a lady
i can tell her anything
oh shit
grandma death
grandma death
you know roberta sparrow
we almost hit her with the car the other day
you 're right
roberta sparrow was famous for her gem collections
kids used to try and steal stuff from her all the time
over the years
as she got older she became more and more of a recluse
now she just likes to stay up there all by herself
i guess she just lost faith in the world
who 's been giving you weird looks
a lot of people
teachers
younger kids
it 's like they 're afraid of me for some reason
but that 's ok
because i know i deserve it
you 're my only son
i know dad
i know i 'm not the best
communicator
but whatever happens in your life
whatever obstacles you come up against
you just say
and do whatever is in your heart
you be honest
and tell the truth
even if they look at you funny
and they will
they 'll tell you that you 're wrong
they 'll call you a fool
but what you 've got to understand son is that almost all of those people are full of bullshit
and they 're scared of people like you
because you 're smarter than all of them
donnie darko perhaps given your recent brush with mass destruction you can give us your opinion
well
they say it right when they are ripping the place to shreds
when they flood the house
that like
destruction is a form of creation
so the fact that they burn the money is
ironic
they just want to see what happens when they tear the world apart
they want to change things
who is frank
a six foot tall bunny rabbit
and when the other rabbits hear of fiver 's vision do they believe him
it could be the death of an entire way of life the end of an era
why should we care
because the rabbits are us donnie
why should i mourn for a rabbit like it was a human
is the death of one species less tragic than another
of course
a rabbit is not like us
it has no history books
it has no knowledge of sorrow or regret
i like bunnies and all
they 're cute
and they 're horny
and if you 're cute and horny
then you 're probably happy that you do n't know who you are
or why you 're even alive
but the only thing i 've known rabbits to do is have sex as many times as possible before they die
cellar door
sometimes it 's the only thing that keeps us going
so
will donnie find his cellar door
i think i already have
but now she wo n't even talk to me
then go find her donnie
do n't let her get away
she was right about the rabbits
go
your mother said that you 've been skipping cycles of your medication
i 've been taking it
i just like to make her feel guilty for all of this
you know abuse her
psychologically
all of this
certainly is n't your mother 's fault donald
so i met a new friend
would you like to talk about this friend
his name is frank
frank
i think he saved my life
how so
do n't you watch the news
i do n't own a television
a jet engine fell on my house
landed on my bed
while i was talking to frank on the golf course
frank
instructed you
to get out of bed
just before this happened
he said to follow him
follow him where
into the future
then he said that the world was coming to an end
do you believe that the world is coming to an end
no
that 's stupid
and when i clap my hands twice you will wake up
do you understand
yes
so tell me about your day donald
i met a girl
what is her name
gretchen
we 're going together now
do you think a lot about girls
yes
how are things going at school
i think about girls a lot
i asked you about school
i think about
fucking a lot during school
what else do you think about during school
i think
about
who 's the boss
who is the boss
i just turn the volume down and think about fucking alyssa milano
what about your family donnie
no i do n't think about fucking my family
that 's sick
donnie
i want to hear about your friend frank
how many times have you seen frank
four times
so far
can anyone else see him
i do n't think so
it 's like a tv station
and they 're tuned into mine and no one else 's
who is they
is frank part of some larger group
i do n't know
gretchen has a theory
that frank is a sign
i told her i thought it was ridiculous
a sign from whom
i think that frank wants me to go to this woman
she wrote a book about time travel
frank asked me if i believed in time travel
that ca n't just be a random coincidence
my dad almost hit her with the car the other day and she said the creepiest thing
she said that every living creature on this earth dies alone
how does that make you feel
it reminded me of my dog callie
is callie still around
no
she died when i was eight
we could n't find her for days
she went and crawled underneath our back porch
do you feel alone right now
nothing
have you told gretchen about the spears
yeah but if i told her about the other stuff about frank
are you embarrassed by these things that you see
you know
every week i come in here and i tell you stuff
and it 's all embarrassing
i tell you stuff that i do n't tell anyone else
and you know what
it 's your turn dr. thurman
i 'm not saying anything else until you tell me something embarrassing about yourself
whoa
that 's ok dr. thurman it 's nothing to be embarrassed about
i have sexual fantasies all the time too
i know
i mean
gretchen
she wo n't even let me kiss her
she says because it 's our first kiss
she 's like waiting for this big
moment or something
i just do n't get it
i just want to get it over with so we can move on to the good stuff
the good stuff
yeah
you know
fucking
have you ever made love donald
and when i clap my hands together twice you will wake up
do you understand
yes
so your parents
why did you disappoint them
i
i was playing with fire
is it frank who wants you to destroy the world to set the world on fire
people get hurt
but it was an accident
the house was under construction
people get hurt
i do n't want to hurt anyone
but you were punished
yes
i went to jail
do you wish that you were punished by your parents instead
they
did n't buy me what i wanted for christmas that year
what did you want for christmas that year
hungry hungry hippos
how did you feel
being denied those hungry hungry hippos
regret
what else makes you feel regret
that i did it again
you 've done it again
yes
i flooded my school
and i burned down that pervert 's house
i think i only have a few days left
before they catch me
why did you do these things donnie
did frank tell you to commit these crimes
i have to obey him
because he saved my life
he controls me and i have to obey him or i 'll be left all alone
and i 'll never figure out what all of this means
if god exists
i think now that he might
why
because i 'm so horny
god exists because you 're horny
i think so
i think that 's one of the clues
it 's a clue that tells us
to keep going
where are we going
where are we going donald
i have the power to build a time machine
how is that possible
grandma death will teach me how
soon
then how is time travel possible
it would have to be god 's portal
they will lead me to it
then i will go back in time
and i wo n't feel regret anymore
when will this happen
soon
time is almost up
what is going to happen
frank is going to kill
who is he going to kill
i can see him right now
where is he donald
he 's right there
he can read my mind and he 'll show me the way out of this
the sky is going to open up
and then he will reveal himself to me
if the sky were to suddenly open up
there would be no law
there would be no rule
there would only be you and your memories
the choices you 've made and the people you 've touched
the life that has been carved out from your subconscious is the only evidence by which you will be judged
by which you must judge yourself
because when this world ends there will only be you and him
and no one else
it 's too late
i 've already ruined my life
you will survive this
donald
i promise you that you will survive
you must let me help you
and when i clap my hands together you will wake up
it 's called the philosophy of time travel
what does time travel have to do with philosophy
guess who wrote it
so i hear you have a girlfriend
yeah
what 's her name
you 're not gon na tell mom are you
why would i tell mom
because you tell mom everything
no i do n't
she worries about you
well do n't worry
i 'm taking my medication
it 's not that
i mean mouthing off to your teachers
i 'll admit
when dad told me what you said to ms. farmer i laughed my ass off
i was just being honest
yeah
well that 's not the way the world works
if you keep being too honest the world will eventually find a way to destroy you
her name is gretchen
that 's a nice name
ok let me see it
i got in
i 'm going to harvard
congratulations
mom and dad wo n't be back until sunday night
it 's halloween carnival
we should throw a party
we could totally get away with it
okay but it has to be a small one
everything is going to be just fine
how much are they paying you to be here
excuse me
what 's your name son
gerald
well gerald i think you 're afraid
well jim i think you 're full of shit
i think you are afraid to ask me for advice
i think that you are a very troubled
confused young man
i think you 're searching for answers in all the wrong places
well i think you 're the fucking anti christ
thank you for seeing us
we
just felt that it was time to discuss
what i think is going on with your son
well you know about his past
and when you said to look for signs of aggression
he was recently suspended from school for insulting his gym teacher
has your son ever told you about frank
come again
frank
the giant bunny rabbit
frank
donnie is experiencing what is commonly called a daylight hallucination
you 're telling me my son has an imaginary friend
he has described lengthy conversations
physical encounters with what i believe to be a manifestation of his subconscious mind
our son just called me a bitch
you 're not a bitch
so let me get this straight
no airline will claim ownership of the engine
so we have to wait for the faa to decide who fixes my roof
fuck that
we 're taking the money out of savings
you are entering a new dimension of sight and sound
what
frankie feedler
you remember him from high school
he was a year ahead of us
he died remember
on the way to the prom
he was doomed
i have n't been accepted yet mother
if you think michael dukakis will provide for this country prior to the point when you decide to squeeze one out then i think you 're misinformed
excuse me
donnie
you 're a dick
did you just call me a fuck ass
that 's enough
you can suck a fuck
no
i took a year off to be with you
of course i care
do n't get angry
what
how did you know --
i did n't realise it was such a big deal
it is a big deal
i caught him flushing pills down the toilet
he knows you check the container
here are the keys to the taurus
there 's plenty of groceries in the fridge
and i left money on the kitchen table
and do n't forget
do n't worry mom
just go you 'll miss your flight
excuse me
but what is the real issue here
the pta does n't ban books from school
the pta is here to acknowledge that there is pornography in our school 's curriculum
do you even know who graham greene is
i think we 've all seen bonanza
kitty i do n't know what to say
they 've suspended him for two days
ever since this jet fiasco i honestly do n't know what has gotten into him
rose i 'll tell you this because our daughters have been on dance team together for two years and i respect you as a woman
but after witnessing your son 's behaviour today i have
significant doubts
our paths through life must be righteous
i urge you to go home and look in the mirror and pray that your son does not succumb to the path of fear
rose
kitty
rose we have a crisis
i am sure that you are aware of the horrible allegations against jim cunningham
yes i saw the news
something about a kiddie porn dungeon
please
do n't say those words
well
as you can see
many of us are devastated by this news
this is obviously some kind of conspiracy meant to destroy an innocent man
and i have taken it upon myself to spearhead the jim cunningham defence campaign
but unfortunately my civic duties have created a conflict of interest
which involves you
beg pardon
rose
i have to appear at his arraignment tomorrow morning
and as you know the girls also leave for los angeles tomorrow morning
now as their coach
i was the obvious choice to chaperone them on the trip
but now you ca n't go
yes
and believe me of all the other mothers i would never dream of asking you given the predicament with your son
but none of the other mothers are able to go
oh kitty i do n't know
this is so last minute
eddie is in new york
rose
i do n't know if you realise how great an opportunity this is for our daughters
this has been a dream of ours for a long time
sometimes i doubt your commitment to sparkle motion
kitty i would appreciate
if you could wait
mr. cole
not only am i a teacher
but i am also a parent of a middlesex child
therefore i am the only person here who transcends the parent teacher bridge
kitty
the bottom line
mr. cole
is that there is material being taught to our children that is cause for this destructive behaviour
and how do they do this
they flood the house
by breaking through the water main
this meeting of the pta was called to inform the parents of our ongoing investigation
i am the pta
and i say that this filth is directly related to this vandalism
chut up
go back to china bitch
maybe martha moo finally went nuts and hijacked the bus
you know there 's like this rule
we get to go home at 7:55
there 's no rule
fuck yeah there is
if the bus does n't show up in thirty minutes you 're supposed to go straight home
wicked
no more fuckin for her
smurfette does n't fuck
bullshit
smurfette fucks all the other smurfs
that 's why papa smurf made her 'cause the other smurfs were getting too horny
not vanity
he 's a homo
we got eggs water balloons and a dozen rolls of toilet paper
i stole four beers from my dad
is mom okay
she 's alive sweetie
where is she
she 's right over there
mommmm
i 'll be right behind you in the hearse
do n't let that worry you annette
you 're what
i -- i 'm quittin the pageant
i heard you i was just tryin to scare you into changin your mind
oh for chrissakes amber the woman clung to your tap shoes while flyin through the air like a goddamn lawn dart
oh god i 'm dead
so what do i say
simple
just say mom i know you sacrificed everything -- relationships dreams -- your tummy ass and thighs -- all to bring me into this world
all so i could have tap lessons and be in the pageant -- the same one you were in
but y'know what
i 'm quittin
there
easy as pie
oh my god
i 'm so dead
yeah you betcha
hell no she ai n't quittin
no
mom said if i did she 'd look up my dad and marry him
once a carnie always a carnie
oh yah
what is wrong with you
i do n't know
i just did n't wanna win like this
you stop right there
you are a good person
good things happen to good people
really
no
it 's pure bullshit sweetie
you 're lucky as hell so you might as well enjoy it
let 's get you a root beer float
okay
do you guys want some shots
i 'm buyin
i never liked her but she did n't deserve to die in the belly of a swan like that
the whole thing 's just kinda sad and lame at the same time
this came for you sweetie
ah
it 's from state
oh my god
it 's all the stuff i get to do
oh my god oh my god
okay okay
we get a personal consultation with a make up artist -- eeeh
okay um there 'll be a choreographer to the stars and oh no -- no way
oh
my
god
what
for chrissakes spit it out
i 'll be stayin overnight at
the airport howard johnsons
right by the airport -- oh amber
there 's an indoor swimming pool
ahhhh
all right say airport ho jo
airport ho jo
i got it
yeah why do n't ya take a
loretta do n't do that
i 'm sorry
they 're just starin
i got ta work with these women
okay sweetie that 's all right
let 's go
let 's go
i just i just ca n't believe it
i 'm minnesota 's american teen princess
our baby 's going to nationals
lincoln alabama -- look out
i 'm gon na be on tv
just like diane sawyer
oh amber
i -- i -- i -- i -- i -- j uh j uh- just wanted to compe e e e ete
i ca n't believe this is happenin
i ca n't believe she said you could n't
amber
here
here wh wh what
my jacket
take it 'cause y'know i got my costume okay'd before the pageant
you can wear it
mrs. leeman
huh
i -- i 'm wearin this costume
i 'm uh i 'm gon na do my talent tonight
oh really -- i do n't think so
uh amber i hate to be the bearer of bad news but rules state that a costume must be okay'd at least a week in advance
and this
this is why we have the rule
my goodness gracious i could n't allow a neckline this low on stage
we have kids in the audience
but you -- i mean
it 's not my fault
i -- i
please
i did n't do anything wrong
sorry
i just thought she might not wanna meet her maker lookin like a cheap whore
well your cheap whore is this family 's lovin' mother
the clemens said to make him look like he just came from snowmobilin
pink cheeks and
-- red nose and ears
i know i know
amber
no do n't say it
another stray bullet to the head
i 'm gon na need more caps
you hafta go home
there 's some kinda emergency at the trailer park
relax that 's my ma 's code for bring home milk and a carton a luckys
no
loretta called
there 's been a
a fire
... yah -- 1963
her beauty worked against her when she started as a reporter in louisville her hometown
those were different times
hey amber y'get my smokes
that 's my mom
i 'll get 'em in a sec
oh shit
they 're from l.a. they wanted to see my room and film me for their movie
oh
how quickly they grow up
hey if they ask you to take off your shirt get the money first
oh mom it 's so ugly
ruined a brand new pair of lee press- ons
well i sat down for a beer and ka- blewey
next thing i know somethin' blows through my kitchen window
next thing i know i 'm ass up in loretta 's flower bed
go on
get out
mom look do n't say anything
first of all i 'm not pregnant
nice mouth you got there mom but i -- i 'm not goin' through this again
you 're not goin' through this again
you
you 're not the one who knows how jiffy pop feels
oh c'mon
first the picture of tammy then brett clemens now this
it 's scary
let me tell you scary amber
look at me
do you wanna look like you been rode hard and put away wet at my age
i 'm a lifer here
best i can hope for is to end up in a descent raisin ranch where they 'll change me twice a day
that 's it i 'm goin'
honest to god if i got to do it over
i 'd start walkin outta this town the minute i took my first step
practically the only thing i would n't do different is have you
god i hope that 's you and not your concussion talkin
it 's me
i just do n't want this to be the thing you 'd do over
this pageant 's your ticket outta here
i know you can win amber
c'mere
i love you so much
i love you much
bye mom
we was robbed
it 's okay
okay okay
listen up
coupla notes from last night 's dress rehearsal
number one gladys says a coupla yous are gettin sexy with your hips durin the physical fitness routine
oh my god
my -- my tap costume 's gone
uh amber
we 're not puttin on our talent costumes
you need to put on your physical fitness outfit
and let 's shake a leg ladies
no wait
it -- it was here before the openin number
wait
what am i sayin
i should just ask you becky
where is it
i hate her
we all do
now let 's go
mrs. clark why are you doing this to me
why 're you pretendin you do n't know what 's goin' on
amber i 'm sorry
i really am
but you know the rules
all talent costumes hafta be okay'd by gladys before the pageant
but does n't someone taking your costume so you ca n't compete overrule that rule
sorry
i -- i do n't make the rules
this this
this is bullshit
amber atkins
that is not american teen princess language
good 'cause this is n't an american teen princess pageant -- it 's it 's nazi germany
what 're you doin' here
oh amber like you 're the only one who visits mary
oh -- oh you bring me some of that snotty attitude becky -- bring it on
well as my mother says at sunday dinner come and get it bitch
oh i 'll get it
i 'll get it all right
i might even take seconds
if you want seconds then i 'll make sure it 's hot enough for ya
bitch
here i did n't get any
here have some
so anyone talk to janelle
yah -- i brought her some flowers this morning
she 's in the room next to my mom
she 's super happy
amber if i die from these fumes will you be sure to cover the hickies on my neck
yeah
and the bite marks on my ears
yes
i know it does n't matter but on my inner thighs
yes leslie
hi
hi
here i 'll take it
it 's my job
no
it 's all right
i got it
do n't worry about it
oh man you got leutefisk in your hair
then it must be wednesday
what do you mean they take out her butt
oh jesus h. christ
are we on cops again
you could be quiet
hi
hi
it 's just the guys that are
you know makin the movie about the pageant
i told you about 'em
oh naw
hi
this here 's loretta
i tell annette i says you talk to me durin my stories you might as well be talkin to the wall
you guys want a beer
say yous boys been to the leeman 's
loretta shut it
y'know if you have you got all the pictures of the winner you need
shut it up loretta
oh christ it 's true
let 's just say who should win who deserves to win is amber
why do n't you paint a big red target on your ass loretta
she 's the prettiest y'know
the best damn tapper
the most smartest
most smartest
oh that 's good loretta
make sure you get a picture of that
most smartest
we 're cuttin you off and sendin you home
well excuse me annette but i 'm braggin up your kid here
amber 's gon na be the next diane sawyer y'know
i 'll be right back
see ya later
they 're makin a movie here goddamn it
all right they 're makin a movie
you do n't know where this is gon na
i got a hairdo
do n't fall for it
she lives two trailers down
so
be real easy
go on home loretta
come on
go on the party 's over
anyone
oh jesus mary n joseph she 's pregnant
if you are -- come back sweetie
mommy wants to talk then kill you
annette why do n't you just see if there 's any beer left in that can and relax a bit
we was robbed
okay
take her purse
c'mon rebecca you wanted it
now get up there
ride it side saddle if you have to -- like a horse
c'mon now
it smells funny
like gasoline
oh for chrissakes everything smells like that in mexico
my dress'll reek
listen little missy this cost your dad a pretty penny
now get your ass up there and show me some teeth
i 'm a mirror
correction
this spunky monkey on my right is terry macey
and we are your minnesota american teen princess state board
we 're also the co founders of the minnesota modeling academy
applications are at the tiki bar
we 'll wave the fifty dollar application fee if you list a friend and put her address
that 's right
okay
mm hm
people people -- wait wait a minute here
uh while we have n't ruled out sabotage from neighboring state pageants -- iowa wisconsin north dakota
yeah
dakota
ohio
that bitch from
what
wisconsin
all right then
the bitch
the important thing is that we have a winner
do you think that most people would say that teenage beauty pageants are a good idea
oh yah sure i know what some of your big city no bra wearin hairy- legged women 's libbers say pageants are old fashioned and uh and demeaning to the girls --
so what was the theme of the pageant last year
last year
it was buy american
and the year before that
u.s.a. is a okay
can you remember the theme of your favorite pageant
can i
i 'm amer i can
people ask me where i get this
i do n't know it 's
maybe a gift from god or somethin'
... oh yeah right
i ai n't gon na be in no goddamn pageant
look what happened to that dork ass farm girl
tammy curry
yah -- yah
everyone says this is a big accident
she got iced because she wins everything and this time someone did n't want her to win
this pageant 's like a roach motel
girls check in but they do n't check out
yeah
and they say smokin is bad for your health
yeah
what a surprise
gladys leeman 's finally gon na go to state
and she 'll probably ride on becky 's ass all the way to nationals too
i wonder how she 's gon na fix that one
... you betcha
s'posed to be colder- n a witches tit tonight
oh lester
he loves his weather y'know
hey ya like it
open it
yah -- the globe
pull at the equator there
we 're not in the showroom dear
hey
turn that float around
you think a swan 's gon na swim ass first up main street
yah -- gladys had me order that swan special made from mexico in case becky won
i do a lotta business with those people
i always offer to pay 'em in tacos
whoo they love that
hey ted sorry
i did n't know your family was in the garage when i set it on fire
gladys
stop it
guess it was n't a garage sale as much as it was a bake sale
ah- hahahahahahahaha
so help me gladys
becky was my only shot at state
that 's enough
let go
let go of me
oh my god it 's cops
... that filth is better left in the sin cities
a.k.a
minneapolis -- st. paul
... today 's to do list includes a trip to the mall of america
we need outfits for the physical fitness number --
nothin' too showy
y'betcha iris
we still need a third judge and we need to think of a theme
gladys -- gladys
look out
oh my
hello father donigan
sidewalks sidewalks
iris stop
it 's not his fault
the communal wine just proves too temptin for some of them
that 's why we lutherans use grape koolaid for the blood of christ
oh there 's a parking space over there
oh no that 's just a compact
sorry
you 'd think they 'd build the parking lot of america to go with the mall of america
well you know i think everyone 's doing really well considering the fact that she was so young
it 's always hard to see the young ones called home especially on an exploding thresher
it 's just so odd and gross
you know that sometimes it 's hard to understand god 's great plan
yeah
so remember the three most important parts of a good interview
okay everybody listen up
number one american teen princess do n't cross their legs like streetwalkers
okay i designed the float you know
and what 's gon na happen here is that this is going to look like a glistening lake beneath the swan
uh gladys
what
we need more bars
this is -- what
enid ate a whole pan
i swear to god she ca n't do anything by herself
are we on cops
are we on cops
are we on cops
shut up hank
this here 's business
ow harold -- mom said not the head
well mom 's dead so shut your fly trap
i will if you shut your piehole
do n't make me kick ya where the good lord split ya
close up shop
close up shop hank
harold
close up shop
ee aaayeeee aaaayouiaaaeeeeeeee
come on
hankey here ca n't help it if he was born crazier than a shithouse rat
let 's get this straight right now
we would n't have been late at all if it was n't for you
i want to have the big bag of little donuts
you get nothing hank okay
i want to get the big bag of little donuts
there 's your paint can
the next time you drink window cleaner i 'm just gon na leave it in ya
from what i have been gathering i think they think i should be king i think they think i should be king
he should be king
and wear a crown and everything
and everything
he should be king
of course you 're all aware a king must have an heir some one to pass the family name along will some one tell me where i 'd ever get an heir if a king can do no wrong
the king can do no wrong
suppose a pretty dame into my castle came and let us say that i was going strong
she might be stuck on me but what good would it be if the king can do no wrong
the king can do to wrong
king solomon was game he gave each girl his name to number them would make a list that long i 'll bet his thousand wives led miserable lives if the king can do no wrong
we really think he should be king and wear a crown and everything
they think i should they think i should they think i should they think i should be king
here i am father
take a letter
who to
the president of the united states
my dear president
read it back
my dear president
that does n't sound right
take out president
now read it
my dear
that 's not right yet
put back president and take out dear
how does it read now
my president
there 's still something wrong with it
take out president
now what 've you got
my
now we 're on the right track
put back dear
how does it read
my dear
you ca n't say that to the president
put back president
now let 's hear how sounds
my dear president
that 's what i wanted in the first place
tear it up and send it airmail
is that all
take another letter
to my tailor
dear sir
enclosed find check for 100
yours very truly
send that immediately
i 'll have to enclose the check first
you do and i 'll fire you
here i am father
send for my car
his excellency 's car
go out and chase that peanut vendor away from the building -- get rid of him if you have to use violence if necessary call out the militia and if he is n't looking get me a bag of peanuts
i 've tried to chase him but it 's no use he wo n't go
he wo n't eh
we 'll see about that send for your father immediately
but you 're my father
never mind then i 'll get in touch with him myself
in case of fire how long will it take to empty this place
about thirty four seconds
we 'll start a fire -- -- and get rid of these microbes
eureka ammunition company -- gentlemen -- your shipment of sailor hats arrived this morning by freight -- gloria i could go for you in a big way -- however the rifles you sent were a little rusty -- -- and i do n't say that to everybody -- have not received last month 's drawing account
how come
your neck is like a swan
yours very truly
now read it back
eureka ammunition company gentlemen
your shipment of sailor hats arrived this morning by freight
gloria i could go for you in a big way
however the rifles you sent were a little rusty and i do n't say that to everybody
have not received last month 's drawing account how come your neck is like a swan
yours very truly
they 'll know i mean business then they get that letter
see that that gets out immediately and that goes for you too
yes sir
gloria much as i hate to leave i 'd be crazy to stay here
i wonder what 's keeping his excellency
never mind his excellency -- you got ta your pocketbook
yes -- why
i wanna powder my nose
in her dressing room
why what could he be doing there
he could be playing solitaire but i do n't think so
what 's the matter with you
what 's the matter with you
you have n't been still a moment since you 've been here
you act as if you had neurosis --
i no got ta new rosis
my uncle he's- a got a flower shop -- he's a got ta new rosis
hey you
all right
have you got a license
no but my dog he 's a got millions of them --
what kind of a dog is he
he used to be a bloodhound but he 's anemic --
well what is he now
he 's half poodle and half watch dog
half watch dog
yeh he 's only got one eye
i do n't know much about dogs but you ought to be on the end of a leash a ninety nine year leash look what do you call your dog
i do n't call him i whistle
what do you whistle
yankee poodle
i 've got just the place for a man like you but i 'm too busy right now to do any digging
what do you call your dog when you want him
i do n't want him
well if you do n't want your dog why do n't you put him in a pound
he only weighs ten ounces --
i can use you in the house of representatives
we need a man who understands dogs -- and that 's where this country is going to
step inside
that was for you
i 'm sorry i 'm not in
i wanted to have a long talk with you
now look here my good man you 've got to stop yelling peanuts in front of the house of representatives
oh no i ca n't do it
you do n't want to be a public nuisance do you
sure
how much does the job pay
sure if there 's a chance for advancement
you would n't consider going over niagara falls without a barrel
at's a no good
i went to niagara falls once
did you shoot the rapids
no but i shot some ducks
if there was an open season for fellows like you i 'd get myself a hunting license
anyway i 'm going to make you a sporting proposition
you give up the peanut stand and i 'll make you vice president of the country
oh no -- nothing doing
i had a brother who was a vice president once and that 's the last we ever heard of him
well maybe he 's still the vice- president
now if i were to offer you --
hello
yes
no not yet
all right
goodbye
that was for you again
he wants you to call him up as soon as you get back
i do n't know what 's keeping me
i should 've been here a long time ago
now how about my proposition
what other job you got
let 's see -- what 've i got in my cabinet besides mice -- i 've got it -- how would you like to be secretary of the interior
that 's no good
i like to work on the outside
i must have something easy
then you do n't wanna work hard
i do n't wanna work at all
in that case you 'll have to take a civil service examination -- if you pass i 'll put you in the post office -- stick out your tongue
i do n't wanna stick out my tongue
well if you wanna work in the post- office you 'll have to stick out your tongue
look i 'm a very nervous man
i got ta have a job where i come to work at eleven -- go to lunch at twelve -- and quit at one
and twice a year i got ta have a six month vacation
i 've got just the job for you -- secretary of war
at's a fine
you 're lucky i do n't slap your face -- you oughtta be ashamed of yourself
where did you hear that story
you told it to me
oh yes i remember -- and i should have slapped mrs. teasdale 's face when she told it to me
i 'm going right out and find trentino
you go right out and get yourself an army
wait a minute
what kind of an army do you think we oughtta have
i think we oughtta have a standing army so we can save money on chairs
send in the next girl
by the way are you sure we need a spy
sure we got ta have a spy
if we no got a spy who 's gon na tell the other side what we 're doing
i 'm glad i did n't ask you for washington crossing the delaware
we 've got ta have somebody who knows how to get secrets from men
you know how to make love
he 's going to make a good spy
that 's not bad for the first day
that 's not bad for any day
you 're right about that guy -- i think we 've got something
i do n't know about us but i know he's a got something
you no got ta no gun
who said i had a gun
gimme those plans you paper snatchers --
late again eh
you have n't been on time once since this war started
get out there and fight
i ca n't do it
why not
you 're the secretary of war are n't you
yes but i 'm not working for you any more
i 'm on the other side
is that so
i used to think you were two faced but you ca n't be or you would n't be wearing that one
now let 's talk this thing over
how'm i doing boss
fine keep on yelling do everything you can to disturb firefly now what about your cousin
he 's working very hard i got him a job driving firefly 's car he's a driving him crazy and i 'm driving him nuts p e a n u t s
chicolini you 've come just in time
we need a man who 's fearless brave
a man who 's willing to die if necessary
all right -- i 'll go out and find one
firefly must be captured at any cost
that 's easy i 'll get him for you wholesale
it must be done right away
i ca n't do it right away
we 're not allowed to tell a dirty joke hail hail freedonia
if chewing gum is chewed the chewer is pursued and in the hoosegow hidden
if we should choose to chew we 'll be pursued
if any form of pleasure is exhibited report to me and it will be prohibited
i 'll put my foot down so shall it be this is the land of the free
the last man nearly ruined this place he did n't know what to do with it
if you think this country 's bad off now just wait till i get through with it
the treasury is low on dough the last man went and flew with it
if you think we 're short of money now just wait till i get through with it
the country 's taxes must be fixed and i know what to do with it if you think you 're paying too much now just wait till i get through with it
i will not stand for anything that 's crooked or unfair i 'm strictly on the up and up so everyone beware
if anyone 's caught taking graft and i do n't get my share we 'll stand 'em up against the wall and pop goes the weasel
so everyone beware who 's crooked or unfair no one must take a bit of graft unless he gets his share
if any man should come between a husband and his bride we find out which one she prefers by letting her decide
if she prefers the other man the husband steps outside we stand him up against the wall and pop goes the weasel
the husband steps outside relinquishes his bride we stand him up against the wall and take him for a ride
the population must increase with great rapidity
we give a couple seven years to raise a family
if by that time there is no branch upon the family tree we stand 'em up against the wall and pop goes the weasel
your excellency please do n't think me silly but i 'd love to have a picture of you
i want to hang it in my bedroom
you could n't hang me in your bedroom -- i 'll make a note of it
where 's my secretary
you keep that up and you 'll crab the whole war
carry out this tragic folly if you will -- but i for one will not be a part of it
i will stay here in freedonia
oh your excellency is n't there something i can do
yes but i 'll talk to you about that when we 're alone
i shall dance for you tonight as i 've never danced before
this is a fine thing to be doing at my age
are you getting tired
not at all
when i was a boy back on the farm i used to pump my own water
excellency may i present my niece
go ahead
you do n't understand
this is my niece vera
and vera niece too
when you get through with her feet you can start on mine
i have n't been to a chiropodist in two years
if that 's not an insult i do n't know what is
gloria i love you
i --
ca n't we go some place where we can be alone
what can this mug offer you
wealth and family
i ca n't give you wealth
but we can have a little family of our own
this has gone far enough
this interruption is humiliating to say the least
well why not say the least and get it over with
that 's what you think
you swine
give me that again
you worm
once more
you upstart
that 's it
no man lives who can call a firefly an upstart
then it 's war
yes
how 're ya fixed for ammunition
bah
then it 's war
i 'm sorry we lost our tempers
i 'm willing to forget if you are
forget
you ask me to forget
why my ancestors would rise from their graves
and i 'd only have to bury them again
a firefly never forgets
i am willing to apologize
i 'm willing to do anything to prevent this war
nothing doing
i 've taken a lease on the battlefield
i 'd lose my deposit besides i 've already ordered the ammunition
what i called you
why what did i call you
i do n't remember
oh -- you mean
worm
no that was n't it
was it -- swine
no
it was a seven letter word
oh yes
-- upstart
that 's it
why er mrs. teasdale this is an outrage
this man is impossible
my course is clear
this means war
you runt
i still like upstart the best
your excellency the eyes of the world are upon you
notables from every land are gathered here in your honor -- this is a gala day for us
well a gal a day is enough for me
i could n't handle any more
if it 's not asking too much -- for our information just for illustration tell us how you intend to run the nation
these are the laws of my administration no one 's allowed to smoke or tell a dirty joke -- and whistling is forbidden
you 've made a wonderful impression
your views are liberal
it is easy to see you have an open mind
that 's what i get for dressing in a hurry
your excellency you must n't forget your appointment at the house of representatives
have you got your speech ready
i wrote a speech last night that 'll knock them off their seats
four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation --
why that 's the speech that lincoln made at gettysburg
he did
i told my son not to leave it laying around
where is son
oh rufus
all i can offer you is a rufus over your head
oh your excellency i do n't know what to say
i would n't know what to say either if i was in your place
maybe you can suggest something
so -- you 've come to ask for clemency
i 'll give the enemy no quarter -- not a dime
but your excellency -- the ambassador is here on a friendly visit
he came to ask you to patch up the breach
let him patch up his own breeches
oh wo n't you reconsider
well maybe i am a little headstrong
but you know it 's awfully hard to forget what he called me
guard them with your life
do n't leave them out of your sight
if the enemy gets those papers we 're lost
if they do n't get them we 're lost
ca n't you see what i 'm trying to tell you
i love you
mrs. teasdale you 're the salt of the earth
they do n't come any better than you
now -- er --
well -- they might come better but they do n't come any bigger
and the bigger the better
the bigger the betta you 've got on a horse the more you lose and speaking about horses why do n't you marry me
come come -- say yes and you 'll never see me again
i 'll go way if it means your happiness
oh your excellency you take me off my feet
gloria -- may i call you gloria
why -- why -- of course
you can call me gloria too
gloria -- what a beautiful name
when i was born my mother named me gloria -- two minutes later she found out her mistake
i hope i 'm not interrupting
take a seat -- you 're next
your excellency something terrible has just happened
that 's all right
i 'll fix you right up
you know i think they think i should be king
although it would please me to govern the throng suppose i were king and then everything went wrong
the king can do no wrong
your uncle has been such a friend to us in every crisis
without his country 's financial aid --
what is money
mrs. teasdale for you -- i would do anything
ambassador
i am so anxious for you to meet our new dictator
mrs. teasdale -- no matter who rules freedonia to me you will always be the first lady of the land
... but would further cement the relations of our countries
ambassador trentino i am indeed honored
but you see well i --
oh
then there his somebody else
well no -- not exactly -- but --
gloria -- i 've waited for years
i wo n't be put off
i love you
i want you
ca n't you see that i 'm at your feet
gentlemen
gentlemen
i did n't come here to be insulted
i shall report this indignity the my president
mrs. teasdale i feel this regrettable occurrence will plunge our countries into war
this is terrible
mrs. teasdale i 'm willing to pocket my pride and do anything i can to make up with his excellency
oh would you
for you i would do anything
so that 's the one you want to marry
with mrs. teasdale as my wife and freedonia under my control --
maybe it 's not going to be so easy
from what i 've heard mrs. teasdale is rather sweet on this rufus t. firefly
that 's where you come in
i 'll leave him in your hands and do n't forget you 're supposed to be my niece
uncle you ca n't do this
my dear niece -- i must ask you not to interfere
war is not a woman 's problem
it is every woman 's problem
who supplies the sons
-- the brothers
-- the husbands
who
mr. merrick sugar
yes please two
one or two
two please
oh yes
you have so many nice things and so much room
oh
and here is one of frederick 's mother
how lovely
they have noble faces
i 've always thought that myself
oh yes
oh
why mr. merrick she 's beautiful
she has the face of an angel
she was an angel
she was so kind
so kind to me
it 's not her fault for in the fourth month of her maternal condition she was knocked down by an elephant
i 'm sure i must have been a great disappointment to her
oh no mr. merrick
no
no son as loving as you are could ever be a disappointment
if only i could find her
if only she could see me now here with such lovely kind friends
you mrs. treves and you mr. treves
then maybe she would love me as i am
i 've tried to hard to be good
you wo n't be long
i 'll join you shortly
did it go well darling
yes very well i think
are the girls in bed
yes and they send their kisses
would you like your sherry now
no i think a whiskey
freddie
freddie do n't look so discouraged
i should n't be
we made great progress today
i taught him to repeat a few basic phrases
he did rather well too but i had to lead him every step of the way
though frankly at times i was unsure of who was leading whom
what do you mean
well i was n't sure whether he was parroting me because that 's all he was capable of or whether he sensed that that 's all i wanted to hear and he was trying to please me
but i thought you said that he was rather
simple
he is
i mean i 've always thought he was
i think he must be
is he simple
or is that just something i 've wished upon him to make things simpler for myself
i 'm sorry
i do n't know either
i just do n't know
well these things take time
i 've only got until two o'clock tomorrow afternoon when carr gomm meets him
somehow between now and then i 've got to make john merrick at least seem like an intelligent man
why am i fooling myself
nothing short of john delivering the sermon on the mount is going to sway carr gomm
john loves the house
do you
yes
and here are my mother and father
you stay with me
dinner will be served shortly dear
more romances for john
hmmm
... freddie
what 's the matter
you 've been like this all evening
oh
i 've just been thinking about something that man bytes said
oh freddie
what could that wretched vampire say to upset you
that i am very little different from him
oh that 's absurd frederick
no no frederick that 's all wrong
john is happier and more fulfilled now than he has ever been in his entire life
and that is completely due to you
but why did i do it
what was this all for
so john merrick could live out his last days in peace and comfort
or so i could become famous
frederick just what is it that you are saying
... am i a good man or am i a bad man
oh frederick
excuse me mr. treves sir
yes
i found it
did you see it
our man is sick
come right away
what is it
like this
i 'll get my bag
you sly bastard
you 're doing this to spite me are n't you
aw bytes he 's sick
he 's doing it to spite me i tell you and it 's got to stop
he 's sick bytes
he 's going to die
if he does it 's his own fault
but i 'm not burying that swollen bag of flesh
what did you do to him
he 's been like this all night
what do you mean
he was fine when he left here and now look at him
i intend to
what happened
he fell
he falls
he must have taken quite a fall
he 's a clumsy git
never watches where he is going
why is he sitting up like this
he needs rest
that 's the way he sleeps
if he lays down he 'll die
head 's too heavy
this man belongs in hospital
ca n't you fix him up here
he 's my livelihood
listen
you listen you 're not going to have much of a livelihood if this man dies
he 's got the rale he 's very weak and i do n't know how much damage has been done by his fall
now stop wasting time and fetch a cab
i like doing business with you
you and i understand each other completely
i know i can trust you
ca n't i
everything will be seen to
i want my man back
just a moment how did you get in here
never mind that i want my man
he 's still very sick
please come downstairs with me
i 'll explain the situation
don't
do n't muck me about
you 've had plenty of time to fix him up and he 's leaving with me now
do you understand me
now mr. treves
we had a bargain
you misunderstood
this man suffered a severe fall if you take my meaning
he 's my patient now and i must do what
pull the other one why do n't you
we made a deal
i know what you 've done to him and he 's never going back to that
he 's a freak
that 's how they live
we 're partners him and i business partners
you 're willfully deprivin me of my livlihood
all you do is profit from another man 's misery
you think you 're better n me
you wanted the freak to show all your doctor chums and make a name for yourself you guv
so i gave him to you
on trust in the name of science
and now i want him back
you do n't own this man
i want him back
so you can beat him
so you can starve him
a dog in the street would fare better with you
i 've got my rights damn you and i 'm going to the authorities
now i think we really do understand one another
right
right
good morning treves
good morning sir
you 've acquired a taste for this
it 's quite nutritious sir
do n't be mad
this muck can kill you
i certainly sympathize with your problem treves
why do n't you try the british home or the royal hospital for perhaps they would have a place for him
yes sir i 'll look into that
would you like to meet him sir
have you contacted the british home and the royal hospital
ah no sir
i had planned to see them in the morning
good
how is the patient
he 's doing very well
in fact that 's why i came to see you
i think that if i were to present mr. merrick to the hospital committee then they would have a chance to see for themselves not only the extraordinary nature of the disease but of the man as well
if the committee had a chance to speak with him hear him say a few words for himself i 'm sure they would see him as a patient rather than as a violation of the rules
a few words
i thought he was imbecile
well sir perhaps i should explain
i really do n't think that 's necessary treves
i 'm quite sure the committee will be able to make an equitable decision on the merits of the case such as they are
i do n't agree
no one can make a reasonable decision about this man 's future without at least meeting him
no doctor would presume to diagnose a patient he had never met
no treves it 's out of the question
now if it was up to me i 'd say certainly let 's meet the fellow by all means i 'm sorry i simply ca n't speak for the other members of the committee
then will you meet him as a representative of the committee
mr. treves it 's out of the question
i want to hear as soon as possible what the other hospitals can do
i 'm sorry
singularly unpleasant chap
uh
i do n't suppose there would be any harm in my meeting your
patient mr. treves
thank you very much sir
shall we say in a few days then
shall we say two o'clock tomorrow afternoon
wh
whatever is most convenient for you sir
two o'clock then
you know treves
it seems this acquaintance of yours has become rather more than just an acquaintance
... yes sir
it 's only a physical problem
he has trouble with certain sounds because of the constrictive deformity of the mouth
but he can talk and has a great eagerness to make contact with people who will let him
so if you have any difficulty understanding what he is saying just tell me and i 'll make it clear
speaking is one thing treves but can the man comprehend
... as i said it 's only a physical problem
but i do feel that mr. merrick is very flattered that you 're taking the time and trouble to meet him and he 's most anxious to make a good impression so he might seem rather nervous
he need n't
i have no desire to cause him any discomfort
did you make those inquiries we spoke about
yes i spoke to both the british home and royal hospital for incurables
i 'm afraid that they were n't very encouraging but they said they 'd bring it up at their next committee meeting so we should have their answers shortly
fine fine
you know your dedication to this patient is an inspiring thing treves
but you must remember that this is a hospital and there are many patients here
patients who can be made well and you owe them your first consideration
just do n't become so obsessed old man that you begin to neglect them
oh yes
and what was that john
it was a nice try treves but the man is so obviously mouthing your words
yes i 'm very sorry to have wasted your time sir
i just felt that i had to do anything i could to protect him
i 'm sorry too
he simply does n't belong here
he 's be much happier somewhere else where he could be constantly looked after
believe me frederick it 's better that it worked out this way
good day
how did you know the rest
i never taught you the rest of it
i do n't understand
tell me john how did you know the rest of the 23rd psalm
you are quite right treves this is an exceptional case
and i quite agree that the committee should see mr. merrick
i could easily arrange
no not that way
broadneck and the others do n't like to deal with patients directly
it makes them queasy
do you have any photographs of mr. merrick
well yes
excellent
we shall present them along with the other particulars of the case to the committee
i want them to see exactly how horribly his body has been affected
you and i shall vouch for his inner qualities
do you think they 'll go along with us
of course they will
they 're reasonable men
do n't we
no we do n't
their committees have informed me that they 're unwilling to take mr. merrick even if they were supplied with funds
they do n't want him
well it 's up to us then is n't it
has the response picked up
frankly treves it 's not what i 'd expected
a few small cheques
well- wishers
do n't worry these things undoubtedly take time
but he 's so afraid he 's going to be carted off
i 've promised him that wo n't happen
well
i 'll let you know if there 's something in the afternoon post
please do
do n't you think this is a bit premature
we do n't have the backing yet to
steady on treves
have a seat
how are you feeling today
i feel much better
thank you for asking
and you
i 'm feeling very fit thank you
how is your bronchitis
i feel much better
thank you
are you comfortable here
everyone has been very kind
i am extremely grateful
... i
everyone has been very kind to me
of course
how long did you and mr. treves prepare for this interview
... everyone has been very kind
yes of course
well it 's been a pleasure meeting you mr. merrick
good day
what is it treves
thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies thou anointest my head with oil
abominable things these machines
one ca n't reason with them
what a mess
i say freddie what are you about
oh nothing
nothing of any great importance
good lord freddie
what have you got in there
you 'll know presently
at the meeting of the society
but until then i beg of you fox keep it to yourself
certainly if you insist
you must have quite a find there
i do n't know what i 've got
nothing of any importance eh
you never mentioned his mental state
he 's imbecile no doubt from birth
he speaks but
it 's all gibberish
no the man 's a homeless idiot
i pray god he 's an idiot
fair katharine and most fair will you vouchsafe to teach a soldier terms such as will enter at a lady 's ear and plead his love suit to her gentle heart
your majesty shall mock at me i can not speak your england
o fair katharine if you will love me soundly with your french heart i will be glad to hear you confess it brokenly with your english tongue
do you like me kate
pardonnez moi i can not tell vat is like me
an angel is like you kate and you are like an angel
o bon dieu
les langues des hommes sont pleines de tramperies
what say you fair one
that the tongues of men are full of deceits
oui dat de tongues of de mans is be full of deceits
i know no way to mince it in love but directly to say i love you
what
a speaker is but a prater a rhyme is but a ballad
a good leg will fall a straight back will stoop a black beard will turn white a curl'd pate will grow bald a fair face will wither a full eye will wax hollow but a good heart kate is the sun and the moon or rather the sun and not the moon for it shines bright and never changes but keeps his course truly
good day
i 've brought you some things
i hope you 'll like mr. merrick
i hope you do n't think it too forward
oh no
i knew you 'd understand
here
i want you to know that i do n't go about giving my pictures to just anyone
oh no
i would never think it
it 's so beautiful
you are so
i 'll give it a place of honor here next to my mother
she 's very pretty your mother
yes
have not saints lips and holy palmers too
ay pilgrim lips that they must use in prayer
o then dear saint let lips do what hands do
they pray grant thou lest faith turn to despair
why mr. merrick you 're not an elephant man at all
oh no
oh no
no
you 're a romeo
john i 'd like you to meet one of the brightest lights of the british stage mrs. kendal
mrs. kendal john merrick
good day mr. merrick
it 's all arranged
i 'll send over some evening gowns for the sisters that you select to accompany mr. merrick
you 'll be using the royal entrance and princess alexandra herself will be there to welcome him to her private box
i 'm very grateful to you mrs. kendal
this is just the thing to help him forget his ordeal
john will be very excited
well it is a miracle he ever got back
and i 'm sure mr. treves under your expert care he 'll have many happy years ahead
i fear not mrs. kendal
even in the short time he was gone the size of his head has increased rapidly
as is his pain
how awful for john
and yet not once have any of us heard him complain
is he
dying then
yes
there is nothing more frustrating nothing that makes a physician feel more useless than standing by watching his patient deteriorate
and when that patient is a friend no
no there 's absolutely nothing i can do
well it 's all quite
i 've never heard
it 's quite
yes
you alright
y y yes--
want to come out
you 're english
of course
you want out
yes
wo n't be a moment
i 'm sorry i could only get you a third class ticket but it 's all we had
oh no my friend
say hello to london for me
i miss her
oh yes
you know i saw you once there in london
you 're a great attraction
feeling better now mr. merrick
yes
thank you very much
well if there is nothing more i suppose we 'll be leaving you now
no nothing
the hallway
oh the wastecan
i meant no harm it was the only place where i could find cardboard
i thought it has been thrown away
it 's alright it was thrown away
no one wants it
it 's just that it 's a little dirty that 's all
what 's this
the main spire
the
oh the spire
how silly of me it 's as plain as day
mr. merrick where did you learn to do this
... i learned a long time ago
i 'll have to find some more
yes
well good day mr. merrick
yyyy
yyye
yyyess
yes john
... yyes
yyyess
yyess
that 's much better
i could understand that yes
yes
very good
oh yes
now listen
i 'm going to say some things to you and i want you to repeat them
um
i want you to say them back to me
do you understand
i 'm going to say some things to you and i want you to say them back to me
do you understand
yes
excellent
now say
hello
hello
my name is
my
name is
john merrick
john
merrick
say merrick
merrick
say mmmerrick
mmmerrick
say mmmerrick
mmmerrick
well that 's alright
i understand you
now say the whole thing again hello
hello
my name is
john merrick
why my dear mrs. mothershead how good of you to join us
mr. merrick will you please introduce yourself
hello my name is john merrick
the lord is my shepherd i shall not want he maketh me to lie down in green pastures he leadeth me beside still waters
he restoreth my soul he guideth me in the paths of righteousness
righteousness
righteousness for his namesake
very good very good
now when your visitor comes today i want you to say it exactly the way you said it just now
i will introduce him to you and you will say the words you 've learned
if you have any trouble with any of the words i 'll help you
i 'm sure you 'll be just fine
if you do as well for him as you 've done for me these last two days then i 'm sure our visitor will be very pleased
now let 's go through the whole thing again shall we
i will say may i introduce you to mr. carr gomm
and you will say
hello my name is john merrick
i am very pleased to meet you
john may i introduce you to sir carr gomm
hello
my name is john merrick
i am very pleased to meet you
why did you let me go on like that teaching you what you already knew
why did n't you tell me you could read
you did not ask me
i never thought to ask
how can you ever forgive me
oh no do not say that
you have been so kind to me
i was afraid to say too much
people always want me to be quiet
you wanted me to speak but i was afraid
forgive me
we do have a lot to talk about do n't we
good evening
how are you feeling
good evening
very well thank you
and you
very well thank you
i have something for you john
i 'm sure you 'll enjoy it it 's very popular
this
is my new home
yes
the hospital
of course
what did you think
how long will i stay here
i promise you
you will never see the inside of that horrible place again
you will never ever go back to the workhouse
or that man
it 's a splendid room do n't you think
you look splendid john
thank you very much
when one is invited to tea one must look one 's best
john
what 's the matter
john
why are you upset
i 'm not used to such kindness
from a beautiful woman
well it 's a lovely bedroom
what do you call that thing above the bed
that 's a canopy john
ohhh
how is your tea john
it 's very good
i 'm enjoying my visit with you very much
it 's so very kind of you to have me as a guest in your home
i 'm sorry i made a spectacle of myself
not at all john
i love the way you 've arranged your pictures on the mantlepiece
is that the way it 's done in most houses
oh yes
who are they of
oh our relatives
the children
the children
may i see
of course
the children
where are your children
oh they 're gone for the day
with friends
friends
ah yes friends
how nice
when will the stream be aweary of flowing under my eye
when will the wind be aweary of blowing over the sky
when will the clouds be aweary of fleeting
when will the heart be aweary of beating and nature die
never oh
never nothing will die
the stream flows the wind blows the heart beats nothing will die
mr. treves there is something i 've been meaning to ask you for some time
yes john
... can you cure me
no john i ca n't
i can care for you but i ca n't cure you
i thought as much
the cathedral is coming along nicely
yes soon i will start the main spire but i must finish these columns first how kind of her
how blind of me
is there anything else john anything at all that i could get for you
oh no
there is nothing
i have everything you have given me everything i could possibly want
i am happy every hour of the day
i only wish there was something i could give to you
please john it would give me so much pleasure to give you something
something just for yourself
is n't there something you would like to have
you want a dressing bag john
you do n't think it 's too gaudy do you
... my
home
yes john
you did this for me
yes
please
please thank the governing committee for me
i will do my utmost to merit their kindness
my home
there is one more thing john
here
stand up john
let them see you
oh no i could n't
it 's for you john
it 's all for you
go ahead let them see you
will the cathedral be finished soon john
yes very soon
splendid
it 's truly a masterpiece
well i suppose i 'll be on my way now
i hoped your enjoyed yourself this evening
oh yes
it was wonderful
i 'm glad john
goodnight
yes john
mr. treves tell me
tell me truly
is it alright did i make any mistakes that you can see
no john not one that i can see
then i should n't change anything
no no i would n't change a thing
goodnight john
sleep well
you too my friend
goodnight
ah mothershead
how are you feeling today
fine
good
excellent
now then mrs. mothershead i want you to come into this room with me
inside there is a man with a rather
unfortunate appearance
i 've heard
yes
well i want you to clear up a little mess a breakfast tray was spilt
and bring up another breakfast
when you 've done that you and i shall give the man a bath
but mothershead i 'm counting on your many years of experience to get you through this above all do not scream do not cry out or in any way show this man that you are frightened of him
sir you do n't have to worry about me
i 'm not the sort to cry out
shall we go in
yes
yes let 's go in
the workhouse
yes
the workhouse
good morning mr. treves
it 'll be his bath time soon
has he eaten
not quite yet mrs. mothershead
there seems to be some difficulty this morning
wo n't come out eh
no he 's very upset about something
just being obstinate sir
i 'll handle it
watery headed bunch
i regret that i must leave you here m lord m lady
thank you so much for coming
it was an act of the greatest charity
incredible is n't it
well i think john has had enough visitors for one day mothershead
i 've got a lecture at the college i 'll be back this evening
excuse me sir
i 'd like to have a word with you
oh
well quickly please mothershead i 'm overdue
i ca n't understand why you let those people go in there sir
now mothershead you have to understand that this is very good for john
he relishes contact with people outside the hospital
but you saw them sir
they could n't hide their disgust
they do n't care anything for john they 're just trying to impress their friends
are n't you being just a little harsh mothershead
you yourself hardly treated john with much loving kindness when he first arrived
i bathed him did n't i
i fed him and cleaned up after him
if loving kindness can be called care and practical concern then yes i did treat him with loving kindness and i 'm not ashamed to say it
you 're right mothershead please forgive me
of course i appreciate everything you 've done for john and i 'm glad that you are concerned about his welfare
but i 'm the physician in charge and i must do what i think best
i 'm also very late so please forgive me
mr. treves some more books arrived for mr. merrick
thank you mothershead
have a porter put them in my office
yes sir
what 's that
a dressing bag
very smart indeed
yes
john wants it
a dressing bag
you do n't think it 's too gaudy do you
well
john thinks it 's very dashing
something no gentleman should be without
i 'm inclined to agree
so you see john there 's no need for a lighthouse
all your friends are here
welcome home john
where is mr
merrick
i
i do n't know what you mean sir
do n't lie to me
i know all about it
you were seen
where did you take him
take him
now wait
i did n't take him anywhere
we were just having some fun
we did n't hurt him
just having a laugh that 's all
he 's gone
when i left him he was in his bed safe and sound
you bastard
you tortured him
you tortured him you bastard
where is he
you're not listening to me
i ai n't done nothing wrong
people pay to see your monster mr. treves
i just take the money
you're the monster
you're the freak
get out
you're finished
are you the proprietor
and who might you be sir
just one of the curious
i 'd like to see it
i do n't think so
no sir we 're closed
i 'd pay handsomely for a private showing
are you the proprietor
handsomely
who sent you
pardon me
never mind
i 'm the owner
right
where is he
who father
who
who
whoever you 've got in here of course
there is no one
well
where is he
there 's nobody here father
look for yourself
ah
so you admit there is someone
you 're losing your temper
it 's all in your own mind father
it 's you who imagine that i 'm always up here with some man or other
i do n't know how you do it aud
i sometimes think you 've got some of your mother 's magic
there is no magic father
my mother had no magic
she did i tell you
she could blind me as easily as the night the day
it 's your fantasy
but one day i 'll catch you
like i caught her
it 's all right
it is n't happening
but father it is
it 's sinking
hy brasil is sinking
well my dear i think you 'll find it 's all a question of what you want to believe in
i have slightly more experience of these matters than you
what did you say
i said welcome
welcome
well of course
we always welcome friends
what 's the matter
please
you do n't know what you 're doing
what
put them down
please make them put them down
why
yes
but surely you know
have you ever felt like this about anyone else
what
you mean got into bed with them
no of course not silly -- i mean felt like this about them
you mean
you have got into bed with somebody else
no i mean have you ever felt that for the first time in your life you 'd met somebody you could believe in with your whole heart
someone whose goals suddenly seem to be your goals
whose dreams seem to be your dreams
have you ever been to bed with anyone else
what does that matter
but you 've
you 've
felt like this before
it was different
what was she like
oh
oh i did n't know her very well
but you loved her all the same
we never went to bed together
why do you go on about that
what does it matter
you 've been to bed with somebody else have n't you
i 've never loved anybody
i 've never been to bed with anybody
the cloak invisible
it was my mother 's parting gift
the fifth one this week
oh for goodness sake
and i thought you said it was something special
that 's just what i was trying to tell you
you are
five this week how many the week before
you 're as bad as my father
and the week before that
we must n't let him land
who
halfdan the black
but erik
just give me a hand
i mean you could have killed yourself
where 's the cloak invisible
why
no
no
we are in the spell of the horn
hatred will destroy us
that 's right
no
do n't look
the abyss will suck away your strength
i must look
keitel
hold this
you still want to go to asgaard
of course
do you believe i love you
i
but i
you do n't have to love me
just do you believe i love you
yes -- i believe you do
then let go
the second note
the second note to wake the gods
erik
you 've done what you came to do
not quite
blow the third note
the note to take us home
there is something i must ask the gods
no living man has ever set foot in the halls of asgaard
the gods will never let you return
then i shall come too
no
no
i do n't want to live without you
but aud
i
i came to find someone
loki
where did you come from
halfdan wanted to stop you waking the gods
so
i disguised myself to sabotage their plans
how do we know this is the way
we blew the horn resounding
she blew the horn resounding
now what can you want with me erik the viking
i should n't have come
they will make fun of you for listening to an old woman 's stories
what do you see erik
i see the world
is it night or day erik
it is day of course freya
is it summer or winter erik
have you ever seen the sun erik
the sun is up beyond the clouds -- where it always is
but have you ever seen it
think back
of course not
but
when i was a child
i remember a dream
it was as if the whole sky was blue
the sky was blue erik
once
is there nothing men can do
the gods are asleep erik
i will go and wake them up
and will the dead ever return freya
that i can not tell you
no
we do n't
the gods decreed that if ever a sword spills human blood upon these shores the whole of hy brasil will sink beneath the waves
how
well
for a start
er
there 's no killing
well obviously there 's no killing
well
is n't it great
er
well
we
we
would be terribly grateful if you
all
would sing for us
you 're just saying that
of course we 're not we 'd genuinely like to hear you sing
really
really
and you 're not just saying it because you think we want you to
no
right
summon the musicians
we 'll do the one that goes tum tum tum- tum ti tum tum
we 're just not a very musical nation
no no
it was very
er nice
now i want you to be absolutely totally genuinely honest with me
did you really truly honestly like it
no
they did n't like it
oh god
i want to die
your majesty
we come from a world where there is no music
where men live and die by the axe and by the sword
well how d'you think i feel
the gods are asleep king arnulf
you try to be nice to people when they 're rude about your singing
i 'll tell you what
yes
careful
they 're not supposed to hurt you
you 've got to let me go
is there something the matter with it
oh
no
no
of course not
it 's just i had n't expected it to be quite so big
well it 's not called the horn resounding for nothing
you do know how to play the horn do n't you
yes
oh yes
then i expect you 'll be leaving first thing in the morning
but it is
look
the important thing is not to panic
have you done this sort of thing before
me
of course
i 've been looting and pillaging up and down the coast
looting and pillaging eh
yes
what about the raping
shut up
it 's obvious you have n't raped anyone in your life
sh
of course i like women
i love 'em
you do n't love me
no
right
this is rape
mark you i 'm not saying i could n't get to like you
in fact
well to be quite honest i prefer it when there 's some sort of mutual feeling between two people
what -- rape
no
it is n't rape then is it
oh get it over with
i do n't suppose
no
what
i do n't suppose you
you do like me at all
what d'you expect
you come in here burn my village kill my family and try to rape me
i 'll kill you if you say anything about this to anyone
about raping me
about not raping you
you don't like it do you
well it just seems a little bit crude that 's all
what about the killing and looting
that 's just as crude is n't it
oh well -- you 've got to do them
why
why have you got to go round killing and looting
to pay for the next expedition of course
but that 's a circular argument
if the only reason for going on an expedition is the killing and looting and the only reason for the killing and looting is to pay for the next expedition they cancel each other out
oh
stop talking as if we were married
well you started it
i just said i did n't feel like raping you
and i was just saying that rape is no more pointless or crude than all the killing and looting that goes on
scream
ah
louder
aaagh
rape
oh thanks
thanks for saving me from a fate worse than death
i did n't mean to
oh that 's all right then
it 's the thought
that counts
you told them i raped you -- why
i dunno
you looked so
so vulnerable
why should you care
why
should you care
tell me your name
is that odin
you 'll have to wait till he 's finished his game
odin
why should you care
i do n't know
i just did
find the rainbow bridge
find it
and cross it
but what
but
what
nothing
halfdan the black chopped his hand off last night
he was lucky
sit there
what are you talking about
come on move it
it 's halfdan the black
i know
snorri
get your oar out
erik
row
what are you doing
it saved my father
what 's wrong with making friends
you do n't go through all the hardships of an ocean voyage to make friends
that 's terrible
you mean if just one person gets killed
halfdan the black 's here
i know
he wants to kill us
but
you 're not even afraid of death thorfinn
i know
i know
it 's not magic
it 's just a trick
do n't you feel it
we 're missing all the fun
what 's it all about
what
we toil and labor we loot and pillage rape and kill
and yet
you talking piffle son
where does it all get us grandpa
who have you been talking to
i met this girl
it 's always the women that start the trouble
she got me thinking
so
what 'd you do to her
i
i
killed her
that 's my boy
he can have my place
i do n't want to go anyway
well you are
slower
in
out
sorry
faster
make your mind up
what are you doing here
you may need a real berserk
ohh
i wanted to sit next to leif
shut up
you there
you there and you there
shut up
row
look the sky is blue
the sun
that 's it
it 's magic
what magic
i 've heard stories of a magic that strikes fear into the heart so you can not fight
what magic have you brought erik
you 'll see
erik the viking
the things you seek are not in our power
we do n't make men love each other or hate each other
but you 're the gods
look
erik
you mean we 'd be dead
no
we 'd be the first living men to set foot in the halls of the gods
thank you very much indeed
now stop it
it 's so nice to feel wanted
leif you sit there
even you sit there
harald you 'd better sit over there
trust me to get the missionary
you ca n't have sven 's father sitting next to sven
they 'll argue the whole time
that 's true
you 'd better sit there
you there and ornulf there
now you 've got all the big ones on one side
that 's better
now you 've got all the ones with beards on one side and all the moustaches on the other
row
has anyone told him we 've got a dragon eating our boat
first we 're flying -- now we 're sinking
well come on
listen
maybe we wo n't get to hy- brasil
maybe we wo n't find the horn resounding
but at least we 've tried
and at least we shall have died like men
like fish
no
let go snorri
i 've got you
you 'll be sucked down too
no
arrgh
there is another way
who gets killed
nobody gets killed
you need to say a bit more than that
oh
er
yes
what 's the matter with them
just say something cheerful
oh
right
well
cheers everybody
i think we should go
right
farewell
for the last time
may the gods prevent
no do n't say anything else
wait erik
keitel blacksmith
bjorn 's not
he could have bjorn 's place
what 's the matter with bjorn
what do you think
but how could he know
unless
so halfdan the black 's using magic is he
well i have a magic to match his
what is it
do n't you see erik
she wants revenge
what are you talking about
and you sven are n't you afraid of crossing the rainbow bridge to asgaard
i will join my grandfather there
what are you talking about erik
what if we could find bi frost the rainbow bridge
only the dead reach asgaard erik
what 's the matter
are you afraid to try
nobody 's ever crossed the rainbow bridge to asgaard
we 'd be the first
but how
i do n't know -- but i 'm not afraid to try
hey you two
what 's going on
i was sitting there
row
death
she has n't got any
she must have a knife or something
hy brasil
is this hy brasil
we must blow the first note
he note that will take us to asgaard
over the edge of the world
sven
let me do something for myself for a change
i came to find my grandfather
i have to go
bye leif
bye
sorry
yeah
well
you will wait
what d'you expect me to do
that 's why they call me
leif the lucky
please
how did he do that
do what
vanish into thin air
he has n't
well where is he then
you coming
you do n't even believe in asgaard
i thought i might do a bit of business on the way
you 're wasting your time
listen
i 've been in this dump for sixteen years and i have n't made a single convert
there was thorbjorn vifilsson 's wife
you converted her
thorbjorn vifilsson 's wife became a buddhist not a christian
same thing is n't it
no it is not
you know my son our lord said
your lord
quite
my lord
said the prayer of faith shall have the sick
i hope the dragon of the north sea gets you and your lord
are you all right
no i 'm not
you do n't need to feel bad about being sea sick you know
how can you help feeling bad when you 're sea sick
i mean many of the greatest sailors were
i know
i know
olaf tryggvason used to throw up on every single voyage
the whole time
non stop
puke
puke
puke
look
i do n't feel bad about it
i just feel ill
he used to puke in his sleep
bastard
is it sort of
like a sinking feeling in your stomach
that 's it
and a sort of slightly sick feeling
that 's it
and you keep wanting to go to the lavatory
oh yes
i had n't noticed that
let me go sven
what are you talking about
i 'm not worth risking your life for
i 've got you keitel blacksmith
if you go
i go too
for your own sake
for the others
i
hang on
well
come on
i
i
who 's that
it 's me
i 'm just going to water the dragon
oh
what
what are you doing keitel blacksmith
get away snorri
what have you got there
ooh that 's a good one
you could charge halfdan fifteen for that one
yes it is good
but i told him ten
you could charge him what you like
you just ca n't make enough swords and spears and knives and daggers to satisfy the demand
you could charge halfdan twenty and he 'd pay it
oh i could n't do that
the blacksmith 's code says
yes yes
of course
the blacksmith 's code
if this is the age of ragnarok keitel blacksmith it is good to us
ca n't make enough swords
ca n't make enough axe heads
but keitel if erik ever finds the horn resounding
if he ever crosses bi frost the rainbow bridge
if he ever wakens the gods
they chase fenrir the wolf from the sky
the age of ragnarok ends
the bottom falls out of the sword business
it 's not just your livelihood that 's at stake but your son 's and the livelihood of all blacksmiths
my brother blacksmiths
that 's right
the blacksmith 's code says i must
honour and protect all blacksmiths
together we stand
you ca n't let erik do that
sh
hurry
you do it
you 'll be able to throw it further than i could
i ca n't swim
i ca n't swim
relax
i 'm drowning
help
urrgh
argh
let go you idiot
help
you 'll drown us bo
help
help
shut up
she knows it was our fault
keep your mouth shut keitel
no
it 's you loki
i should never have listened to you
you 've lost your mind
we came to stop you waking the gods erik
but i did n't want anyone to get hurt
you fool
i should have got rid of you long ago
like you got rid of snorri
made by you loki
by you -- keitel blacksmith
do n't you know erik that is why he went with you
ragnarok was good for his business
it 's not my business any more
kill
kill
stop it
hold it
hold it in
death to dragons
well of course he is
sh
there
that 's a true berserk
i 'm just building up to it dad
well go on
go berserk
give us a chance dad
there is nothing we can do
helpless
he drove me mad
easy dad
and his you 'll never be a berserk if you lose your temper
dad
i hate you
i hate you
he 's not in valhalla
he died of old age
you liar
shut up
erik 's right
we 'll all meet in valhalla
thorfinn
you ca n't die
i 'm not frightened
of anything
you 'll see my grandfather in valhalla
no
he 's not
not
there
tell him i 'm coming
and you 've got both axes
yes mother
and something to sharpen them with
yes mum
and do n't forget never let your enemy get behind you
no mother
and keep your sword greased
yes mother
goodbye dad
and if you have to kill somebody kill them
do n't stop to think about it
i never do
i do n't know honey
it 's horrible
she 's punishing me for being honest
i should just go to her house
maybe you need to look at this as a sign to move on
just make a clean break
i do n't know
i 'm so
i ca n't believe she 'd be so goddamn immature
you were n't supposed to see that
they ca n't erase memories
it 's a joke
it 's a nasty clementine hoax
sweetie we called the company
thanks guys
i hope you feel better sweetie
yeah
say hi to naomi
who was the girl you walked off with
no one
shit
the last time i saw you
anyhoo sweetie i done a bad thing
i kinda sorta wrecked your car
but i thought i do n't know i thought it was cool that you were sensitive enough to know what i was feeling and that you were attracted to it
but i do n't know maybe we 're the normal ones y'know
i mean what kind of people do well at this stuff
and i just liked you so much
you did
you liked me
no it was lovely
hi joel
so no jokes about my name
may i help you
yeah hi i have a one o'clock with dr. mierzwiak
clementine kruczynski
yes please have a seat
he 'll be right with you
ms. kruczynski
hi
how are you today
okay i guess
here we are
i just thought i 'd say hi
i was in the neighborhood
you were not
i was not
oh baby what 's going on
i do n't know
i 'm lost
i 'm scared
i feel like i 'm disappearing
i 'm getting old and nothing makes any sense to me
oh tangerine
nothing makes any sense
nothing makes any sense
come up to boston with me
sure
we 'll go next weekend and --
now
now
i have to go now
i have to see the frozen charles
now
tonight
um okay
i 'll call my study partner
yay
it 'll be great
i 'll get my shit
i 'm so excited
yay
i 'm excited too
oh and i wanted to give you this
it 's a little
thing
i did n't have a chance to wrap it
it 's gorgeous
just my taste
i 've never gone out with a guy who brought me a piece of jewelry i liked
thanks
so let 's get going
long drive
what 's wrong with me
nothing is wrong with you
you 're the most wonderful person i 've ever met
how are you today
okay i guess
well why do n't you tell me what 's going on
do you mind if i turn this on
well i 've been having a bad time of it with um my boyfriend i guess
you guess he 's your boyfriend
or you guess you 're having a bad time with him
what
no
i do n't like the term boyfriend
it 's so gay
maybe gay is n't the right word
but anyway it 's been rough with him
whatever the fuck he is
heheh
my significant other
heh heh
and i guess on a certain level i want to break it off but i feel
y'know
it 's like this constant questioning and re questioning
do i end it
should i give it more time
i 'm not happy but what do i expect
relationships require work
you know the drill
the thing that i keep coming back to is i 'm not getting any younger i want to have a baby
at some point
maybe
right
so then i think i should settle -- which is not necessarily the best word -- i mean he 's a good guy
it 's not really settling
then i think maybe i 'm just a victim of movies y'know
that i have some completely unrealistic notion of what a relationship can be
but then i think no this is what i really want so i should allow myself the freedom to go out and fucking find it
you know
agreed
but then i think he is a good guy and
it 's complicated
y'know
i think i know
i think we can help
why do n't you start by telling me about your relationship
everything you can think of
everything about him
everything about you
and we 'll take it from there
it 's okay if i sit closer
so i do n't have to scream
not that i do n't need to scream sometimes believe me
but i do n't want to bug you if you 're trying to write or something
no i mean i do n't know
i ca n't really think of much to say probably
oh
so
i mean it 's okay if you want to sit down here
i did n't mean to --
no i do n't want to bug you if you 're trying to --
it 's okay really
just you know to chat a little maybe
i have a long trip ahead of me
how far are you going
on the train i mean of course
rockville center
get out
me too
what are the odds
the weirder part is i think actually i recognize you
i thought that earlier in the diner
that 's why i was looking at you
you work at borders right
ucch really
you 're kidding
god
bizarre small world huh
yeah that 's me book slave there for like five years now
really
because --
jesus is it five years
i got ta quit right now
-- because i go there all the time
i do n't think i ever saw you before
well i 'm there
i hide in the back as much as is humanly possible
you have a cell phone
i need to quit right this minute
i 'll call in dead
i do n't have one
i 'll go on the dole
like my daddy before me
i noticed your hair
i guess it made an impression on me that 's why i was pretty sure i recognized you
ah the hair
blue right
it 's called blue ruin
the color
snappy name huh
i like it
blue ruin is cheap gin in case you were wondering
yeah
tom waits says it in --
exactly
tom waits
which song
i ca n't remember
anyway this company makes a whole line of colors with equally snappy names
red menace yellow fever green revolution
that 'd be a job coming up with those names
how do you get a job like that
that 's what i 'll do
fuck the dole
i do n't really know how --
purple haze pink eraser
you think that could possibly be a full time job
how many hair colors could there be
someone 's got that job
agent orange
i came up with that one
anyway there are endless color possibilities and i 'd be great at it
i 'm sure you would
my writing career
your hair written by clementine kruczynski
the tom waits album is rain dogs
you sure
that does n't sound --
i think
anyway i 've tried all their colors
more than once
i 'm getting too old for this
but it keeps me from having to develop an actual personality
i apply my personality in a paste
you
oh i doubt that 's the case
well you do n't know me so
you do n't know do you
sorry
i was just trying to be nice
yeah i got it
my name 's clementine by the way
i 'm joel
no jokes about my name
oh you would n't do that you 're trying to be nice
i do n't know any jokes about your name
huckleberry hound
i do n't know what that means
huckleberry hound
what are you nuts
i 'm not nuts
oh my darlin oh my darlin oh my darlin clementine
no
sorry
it 's a pretty name though
it means merciful right
yeah
although it hardly fits
i 'm a vindictive little bitch truth be told
see i would n't think that about you
why would n't you think that about me
oh
i do n't know
i was just
i do n't know
i was
you seemed nice so --
now i 'm nice
do n't you know any other adjectives
there 's careless and snotty and overbearing and argumentative
mumpish
well anyway
sorry
i do n't need nice
i do n't need myself to be it and i do n't need anyone else to be it at me
okay
shit
shit
i know it 's here
hold on
joel
it 's joel right
yes
i 'm sorry i
yelled at you
was it yelling
i ca n't really tell
whatever i 'm a little out of sorts today
that 's okay
my embarrassing admission is i really like that you 're nice
right now anyway
i ca n't tell from one moment to the next what i 'm going to like
but right now i 'm glad you said that 's okay to me
that was nice of you
it 's no problem
anyway i have some stuff i need to --
oh okay
well sure i 'll just
take care then
probably see you at the book store
unless i get that hair color naming job
hi
i could give you a ride if you need
no that 's okay
thanks though
you 're sure
it 's cold
i do n't want to take you out of your way
it 's okay
yeah
where do you live
you 're not a stalker or anything right
well i probably would n't say if i were but no
you ca n't be too careful
i 've been stalked
i 've been told i 'm highly stalkable
i do n't need that
i 'm not a stalker
you know wilmont
yeah
wilmont
near the high school
look i 'm very sorry i came off sort of nutso
i 'm not really
it 's okay
i did n't think you were
take care
hey do you want to have a drink
i have lots of drinks
and i could --
um --
never mind
sorry that was stupid
i 'm embarrassed
good night joel
you like that
very much
this
someone gave that to me just like recently
i like it too
i like crows
i think i used to be a crow
thanks
that was good that crow sound
do you believe in that stuff
reincarnation
i do n't know
me neither
oh there 's an inscription on the back
the way a crow shook down on me the dust of snow from a hemlock tree has given my heart a change of mood and saved some part of a day i rued
frost
yeah
i 'm not like a robert frost lover by any stretch
his stuff seems strictly grade school to me
but this made me cry for some reason
maybe because it is grade school
y'know
it 's pretty
i miss grade school
i do n't know why i 'm calling it grade school all of a sudden
when i went we called it elementary school
but i like grade school better
sounds like something someone from the forties would call it
i 'd like to be from then
everyone wore hats
anyway cheers
cheers
god that feels so fucking good
take yours off
i 'm fine
yeah
well have a seat anyway
ready for another
no i 'm okay for now
what do you want to hear
you pick it
you just say
i 'm not really --
i do n't know
i ca n't see them from here joel
just pick something good
well i should probably get going
no stay
just for a little while
refill
no
i --
i know a man who needs a refill
thanks
drink up young man
it 'll make the whole seduction part less repugnant
well for the last week anyway
he 's kind of a kid
kind of a goofball but he 's really stuck on me which is flattering
who would n't like that
and he 's like a dope but he says these smart and moving things sometimes out of nowhere that just break my heart
he 's the one who gave me that crow photograph
oh yeah
that made me cry
but anyway we went up to boston because i had this urge to lie on my back on the charles river
it gets frozen this time of year
that 's scary sounding
exactly
i used to do it in college and i had this urge to go do it again so i got patrick and we drove all night to get there and he was sweet and said nice things to me but i was really disappointment to be there with him
y'know
and that 's where psychic stuff comes in
like it just is n't right with him
y'know
i think so
i do n't believe in that soulmate crap anymore but
he says so many great things
we like the same writers
this writer stephen dixon he turned me on to
and he 's cute
it 's fucked up
joel you should come up to the charles with me sometime
okay
yeah
oh great
i 'll pack a picnic -- a night picnic -- night picnics are different -- and --
sounds good
but right now i should go
you should stay
i have to get up early in the morning tomorrow so
okay
i would like you to call me
would you do that
i would like that
yes
so i enjoyed meeting you
you 'll call me right
yeah
when
tomorrow
tonight
just to test out the phone lines and all
okay
how could she have done this to me
how could anyone do this to anyone
you did n't say anything about my hair
yo ho ho
it 's three
i ca n't believe you wrecked my car
you 're driving drunk
it 's pathetic
... a little
i was a little tipsy
do n't call me pathetic
well it is pathetic
and fucking irresponsible
you could 've killed somebody
i do n't know maybe you did kill somebody
oh christ i did n't kill anybody
it 's just a fucking dent
you 're like some old lady or something
how can you watch this crap
where are you going
i 'm fucking crawling out of my skin
oh shit
i remember this
want to go
i want to have a baby
let 's talk about it later
no
i want to have a baby
i have to have a baby
i do n't think we 're ready
you 're not ready
clementine do you really think you could take care of a kid
what
i do n't want to talk about this here
joel we 're fucking gon na talk about it
you ca n't fucking say something like that and say you do n't want to talk about it
clem i 'm sorry
i should n't have --
i 'd make a fucking good mother
i love children
i 'm creative and smart and i 'd make a fucking good mother
oh thank god
it 's going
it 's you
it 's you who ca n't commit to anything
you have no idea how lucky you are i 'm interested in you
i do n't even know why i am
i should just end it right here joel
leave you in the zoo
maybe you could find a nice sloth to hang out with
so um --
would you get me another joely
you 're drunk
you 're a whiz kid
so perceptive so --
you do n't tell me things joel
i 'm an open book
i tell you everything
every damn embarrassing thing
you do n't trust me
no it is n't that
i want to know you
i just do n't have anything very interesting about my life
joel you 're a liar
such a beautiful view
yes indeed
fuck
they 're erasing you clem
oh
i hired them to
we 're in my brain
but i want it to stop before i wake up and do n't know you anymore
wow
um well
ca n't you just force yourself awake
i do n't know
what if you hide me
what do you mean
well
if they 're looking for me in memories i 'm in what if you take me to a memory i 'm not in
and we can hide there till morning
i want my mommy
i do n't want to lose you clem
i 'm right here
i 'm scared
i want my mommy
i do n't want to lose you
i do n't want to lose
joel joely look
it 's not fading
the memory
i think we 're hidden
you know we 're okay
they 're not finding us
you 'll remember me in the morning
and you 'll come to me and tell me about us and we 'll start over
i loved you so much this day
on my bed in your panties
i remember i thought how impossibly lucky am i to have you on my bed in your panties
you remember what happened next
i came over to the bed and you smelled so good like you just woke up slightly sweaty
and i climbed on the bed with you and you said something like --
-- another rainy day
whatever shall we do
there 's this guy
what
there 's this guy
i heard him talking in my apartment
he 's one of the eraser guys
and he fell for you when they were erasing you so he introduced himself the next day as if he were a stranger and now you 're dating him
really
is he cute
he stole a pair of your panties while you were being erased
gross
you must remember to tell me this in the morning
i 'm like so freaked out now
but ca n't you see
i love you antoine
do n't call me antoine
my name is wally
yes but i ca n't love a man named wally
they found us before
the plan did n't work
i do n't know what to do now
hide me somewhere deeper
somewhere buried
happy birthday
thanks joely
a present
oh boy
i scoured the city for it
i love it
i 'm done clem
i 'm just going to ride it out
hiding is clearly not working
yeah
i want to enjoy my little time left with you
this is our first date date
do you remember what we talked about
naomi i guess
yeah
what was i wearing
god i should know
your hair was red
i remember it matched the wallpaper
egad were you horrified
no
i think you were wearing that black dress y'know with the buttons
right
something black though
i 'll buy that
black 's always good
we did talk about naomi
i said are you sure
you seem unsure
i 'm sure i said
but you were n't
i could tell
i was so nervous
i remember i could n't think of anything to say
there were long silences
i thought i was foolish
i thought i 'd mistaken infatuation for love
you said
so what
infatuation is good too
and i did n't have an argument
i dropped you off after
you said --
come up and see me
now
it 's very late
yes exactly
exactly my point
i told her today i need to end it
is that what you want
i did it
i guess that means something
i did n't think you 'd show your face around me again
i figured you were humiliated
you did run away after all
sorry to track you down like this
i 'm not a stalker
but i needed to see you
yeah
i 'd like to
take you out or something
well you 're married
not yet
not married
look man i 'm telling you right off the bat i 'm high maintenance
so i 'm not going to tiptoe around your marriage or whatever it is you got going there
if you want to be with me you 're with me
okay
so make your domestic decisions and maybe we 'll talk again
you said
i saw you sitting over here
by yourself
i thought thank god someone normal who does n't know how interact at these things either
yeah
i do n't ever know what to say
i ca n't tell you how happy i am to hear that
i mean i do n't mean i 'm happy you 're uncomfortable but yknow
i 'm such a loser
every time i come to a party i tell myself i 'm going to be different and it 's always exactly the same and then i hate myself after for being such a clod
even then i did n't believe you entirely
i thought how could you be talking to me if you could n't talk to people
you know what i did
yeah i know
i 'm fishing
you said --
i 'm clementine
can i borrow a piece of your chicken
and you picked it out of my plate before i could answer and it felt so intimate like we were already lovers
oh god how horrid
i 'm joel
you mean like
oh my darlin oh my darlin oh my darlin clementine
huckleberry hound
that sort of thing
yeah like that
nope
no jokes
my favorite thing when i was a kid was my huckleberry hound doll
i think your name is magic
this is it joel
it 's gon na be gone soon
i know
what do we do
enjoy it
say good bye
no i stopped
i did n't want to feel like i was being artificially modulated
i know what you mean
that 's why i stopped
but my sleeping is really fucked up
i do n't think i 've slept in a year
you should try xanax
i mean it 's a chemical and all but it works
and it works just having it around knowing that it 's there
like insurance
yeah
i 'll give you a couple
see what you think
okay
have you ever read any anna akhmatova
i love her
really
me too
i do n't meet people who even know who she is and i work in a book store
i think she 's great
me too
there 's this poem --
did this conversation come before or after we saw the house
i think before
seems too coincidental that way
yeah maybe
do you know her poem that starts seaside gusts of wind,/and a house in which we do n't live
yeah yeah
it goes perhaps there is someone in this world to whom i could send all these lines
yes
i love that poem
it breaks my heart
i 'm so excited you know it
look houses in which we do n't live
male or female
female
at least i have n't been barking up the wrong tree
cool
what are you doing
it 's freezing out here
c'mon man
the water 's fine
nobody 's coming here tonight believe me
this place is closed up
electricity 's off
i hesitated for what seemed like forever
i could see you wanted to come in joel
i knew
i knew by your nervousness that naomi was n't the kind of girl who forced you to criminally trespass
it 's dark
yeah
what 's your girlfriend 's name
naomi
ah ha
now i can look for candles matches and the liquor cabinet
i think we should go
no it 's our house
just tonight -- -- we 're david and ruth laskin
which one do you want to be
i prefer to be ruth but i 'm flexible
alcohol
you make drinks
i 'm going find the bedroom and slip into something more ruth
i 'm ruthless at the moment
so go
i did
i walked out the door
i felt like i was a scared little kid
i thought you knew that about me
i ran back to the bonfire trying to outrun my humiliation
you said so go with such disdain
what if you stay this time
i walked out the door
there 's no more memory
come back and make up a good bye at least
let 's pretend we had one
bye joel
i love you
so you 'll call me right
yeah
when
tomorrow
tonight
just to test out the phone lines
yeah
i think i should go back
joel come here
please
listen did you want to make love
make love
have sex
y'know --
oh um
because i just am not drunk enough or stoned enough to make that happen right now
that 's okay
i --
i 'm sorry
i just wanted to say that
this seems like the perfect romantic exotic place to do it and --
hey joel --
-- and i 'm just too nervous around you right now
i 'm nervous too
yeah
i would n't have thought that
well you obviously do n't know me
i 'm nervous because i have and enormous crush on you
says you were closed off non communicative never told me what you were feeling
says you were a bully
a bully
moi
that 's what it says
you drank too much you picked on me for being passive and timid
well sounds like me
sorry man
says you were jealous and suspicious
says you would sometimes disappear all night then brag to me about your sexual conquests
did i use the term sexual conquests or is that your way of putting it
i do n't know
does n't sound like me
says you were a slob leaving trails of panties and dirty socks in your wake
says you were constantly calling me a slob
it 's sexy that we were like a married couple griping and overly familiar and bored
do n't you think
i sort of do
but i only see it as a fantasy version of reality
cleaned up enough to be erotic
we should have sex
it 's old hat for us
you 're still excited by my irreverence
you have n't yet started to think of it as my gratuitous need to shock
i ca n't stop thinking about you
yay
meet me after work by the old mill
what old mill
is that somewhere we --
i just wanted to say that
come by my house
what took you so long
i just walked in
hmmm
do you miss me
oddly enough i do
ha ha
you said i do
i guess that means we 're married
i guess so
tomorrow night
honeymoon on ice
yeah
did you send this
is it a joke
i probably got the same thing as you
i mean i have n't even told anyone i 've met you
who would even know to do this
maybe it 's true then
it 's my voice on the tape
that 's what you have to say
how could it be true
i never even heard of any procedure like this
it 's a joke
it 's true
i know
i spoke to my friend magda
look i have to go
i have to think
joel we 've fucked
we 've made love
like a million times
and we were so sweet and shy and inept with each other last night
is n't that lovely
that 's me
there you are
naomi it 's just
i 'm afraid if we fall back into this fast without considering the problems we had
it was snowing
there are two of them
could n't make them out
the orange glow of a cigarette
the driver waved
so casual friendly
i 'm like a joke to them
i might be making a mistake
maybe i 'm making a mistake
maybe i just need to learn to live with this
first of all i 'll get over it
secondly it happened
those who do not remember history are condemned to repeat it
who said that
churchill
i 'm not sure
but i do n't care
she did it to me
i have to rid myself of this
fuck her
fuck you clementine
pink
there was a number on it
i remember
al 1718
i have to follow through with this
i have no choice
the pill was pink i remember
it had some letters and numbers on it
what were they
al 1718
al something
four digits
i do n't like taking pills when i do n't know what they are
i have no choice
it 's them
it 's too late
i should maybe talk to you
clementine
i should just maybe talk to her
i love you and if you knew that
if i told you what happened
i 'll explain everything what we meant to each other
i 'll tell you everything about our time together
you 'll know everything again and
maybe if i just explain what happened i would n't have to go through this and i could tell you everything and it would be like you knew and we could rebuild and we could be happy again and
so then she just stops calling
i was n't going to call her
not after the way she was
any messages carmen
right
she called me an old lady here too
and i remember i said
and what are you like
a wino
how 's the chicken
is that like us
are we just bored with each other
she 's so sexy
i loved you on this day
i love this memory
the rain
us just hanging
i ca n't
i have to go home
i 'll do it later
i did n't want to do this
but i had to or they would 've called me a girl
naomi
on the couch
dark
quiet
i wondered if i had made a terrible mistake
i almost reached for the phone about a thousand times
i thought i could take it back erase it explain i had momentarily lost my mind
then i told myself we were n't happy
that was the truth
that what we were was safe
it was unfair to you and to me to stay in a relationship for that reason
i thought about clementine and the spark when i was with her but then i thought what you and i had was real and adult and therefore significant even if it was n't much fun
but i wanted fun
i saw other people having fun and i wanted it
then i thought fun is a lie that no one is really having fun i 'm being suckered by advertising and movie bullshit
then i thought maybe not maybe not
and then i thought as i always do at this point in my argument about dying
okay
i wish you could come
this is it
the night we met
my god it 's over
your back to me
in that orange sweatshirt i would come to know so well and even hate eventually
at the time i thought how cool an orange sweatshirt
i remember being drawn to you even then
i thought i love this woman because she 's alone down there looking out at the black ocean
but i went back to my food
the next thing i remember i felt someone sitting next to me and i saw the orange sleeve out of the corner of my eye
i really should go
i really need to catch my ride
i did n't want to go
i was too nervous
i thought maybe you were a nut
but you were exciting
you called from upstairs
we 'll start with your most recent memories and go backwards -- there is an emotional core to each of our memories -- as we eradicate this core it starts its degradation process -- by the time you wake up in the morning all memories we 've targeted will have withered and disappeared
like a dream upon waking
is there any sort of risk of brain damage
well technically the procedure itself is brain damage but on a par with a night of heavy drinking
nothing you 'll miss
i 'm sorry you saw one of our notification cards
you never should have
well
i did
we can help you through this
why do n't you start now by telling me everything you can remember about your relationship with clementine
it was a mess
i do n't know how it got this way
we can help you through this
why do n't you start now by telling me everything you can remember about --
you have to stop this
what
what do you mean
i 'm trapped in my head and everything i love is being erased
stop it now
yes but
i 'm just something you 're imagining
what can i do
i 'm in your head too
yours
you take it
i do n't know
naomi i really value our relationship
i hope it 's possible for us to stay in touch
do n't do this to me now joel
really
so what 's going on joel
i do n't know i 've just been thinking maybe we 're not happy with each other
what
y'know we 've been i do n't know sort of unhappy with each other and --
do n't say we when you mean you
i think maybe we 're both so used to operating at this level that -- how can one person be unhappy
if one person is unhappy both have to be
by definition
bullshit
who is it
you met someone
no
i just need some space maybe
the thing is joel whatever it is you think you have with this chick once the thrill wears off you 're just going to be joel with the same fucking problems
it 's not somebody else
hi
hi
how was it
you did n't miss much
rob and carrie say hello
hi rob and carrie
go back to sleep
say hi to rob and carrie
have some fun
i hope you get your work done
yeah
so
you have n't been involved with anyone in all this time
it 's been a pretty lonely couple of years
i 'm sorry
well it was my fault -- the break- up
i 'm sorry
oh sweetie
it really does cut both ways
we were taking each other for granted and --
i miss you
miss you too
i have been seeing someone for a little while
oh
great
that 's great
a religion instructor at columbia
a good guy
he 's a good guy
i 'm sorry
i really should n't have --
i 'm glad you called
so you think the dissertation will get published
i do n't know
i 'm not sure there 's a big public demand for books on calvinism and misogyny
okay joel
i suppose you 're right
i had a good time last night
i really did
so i 'm going to get some sleep
i 'm glad you 're okay
we 'll speak soon
night
oh hey patrick
hi mary
how 's it going
oh patrick you did n't want any did you
nah i do n't know
i love quotes
so did winston churchill
he actually has a quotation in bartlett 's about bartlett 's
is n't that trippy
yeah
cool
the quotations when engraved upon the memory give you good thoughts
very cool
trippy
i like to read what smart people say
so many beautiful important things
definitely
i think he 'll be in bartlett 's one day
see you later alligator
kay
hey if you 're ordering lunch for mierzwiak would you --
i better do this stan
it 's freezing out
you found us okay
yeah
poor guy
have anything to drink
we have n't checked
well allow me to do the honors
it 's fucking freezing and i need something
nietzsche
beyond good and evil
found it my bartletts
that 's a good one
yeah i ca n't wait to tell howard
it seems really appropriate
it 's a good one all right
yup
do n't you think howard 's like that
smart
important
yup
let him go stan
i can help
go
it 's amazing is n't it
such a gift howard gave the world
yeah
to let people begin again
it 's beautiful
you look at a baby and it 's so fresh so clean so free
and adults
they 're like this messy tangle of anger and phobias and sadness
hopelessness
and howard just makes it go away
you love him do n't you
it 's stopped
what
listen it 's not erasing
it 's not erasing
he 's off the screen
where
i do n't know
he 's not on the map
he 's coming
you better go
hell no
hey
do you swear you did n't know
i swear
and you never even suspected
never saw us behaving in any unusual way together
once maybe
it was here
at his car
i was coming back from a job and spotted you together
you seemed caught
i waved
you giggled
how did i look
happy
happy with a secret
and after that
i never saw you together like that again
so i figured i was imagining things
i really like you mary
you know that
do you remember anything else
what i was wearing
was i standing close to him
was i leaning against his car like i owned it
how did he look at me when i giggled
tell me everything
you were in red
that red sweater with the little flowers i think
you were leaning against his car
he looked a little like a kid
kind of goofy and wide eyed
i 'd never seen him look like that before
happy
you looked beautiful
you looked in love
thanks stan
oh
hi
what do you want stan
can i
i brought some --
what 's this
nothing
i know what it is
then why did you ask me
i do n't know
i just -- there are a lot of really confused people showing up at the office
they have a right to know
howard is a thief
he steals the truth
i ca n't remember my baby
i ca n't remember my baby
it existed and i ca n't even remember
do you understand that
mary people come to him voluntarily
i wo n't allow it
those who can not remember the past are condemned to repeat it
what do you think of that
that 's from my quote book
the office is filled with people who want their memories re erased
remember the alamo
remember the alamo
mary
please
this is hurting people
okay we 're back in
that was beautiful to watch howard
like a surgeon or a concert pianist
well thank you mary
do you like quotes howard
how do you mean
oh um like famous quotes
i find reading them inspirational to me
and in my reading i 've come across some i thought you might like too
oh
well i 'd love to hear some
okay um there 's one that goes blessed are the forgetful for they get the better even of their blunders
is that nietzsche
yeah yeah it is howard
and here i was thinking i could tell you something you did n't know
it 's a good quote mary
i 'm glad we both know it
there 's another one i like i read
it 's by pope alexander
alexander pope
yes shit
oops sorry
sorry
it 's just i told myself i was n't going to say pope alexander and sound like a dope and then i go ahead and do it
like i psyched myself out
it 's no big deal
you are such a sweetheart
that 's lovely
really
i thought it was appropriate maybe
that 's all
i really admire the work that you do
i know it 's not proper to be so familiar but i guess since we 're outside the workplace i feel a certain liberty to --
it 's fine mary
i 'm happy to hear it
okay
good
great
thanks
i like you howard
an awful lot
is that terrible
i 've loved you for a very long time
i 'm sorry
i should n't have said that
i 've got a wife mary
kids
you know that
i wish i was your wife
i wish i had your kids
we ca n't do this
no you 're right
once again
you 're a decent man howard
what howard
we
have a history
i 'm sorry
you wanted the procedure
you wanted it done
to get past
i have to finish in there
it 's almost morning
we 'll talk later
ah your journal
this will be invaluable
december 15th 2004
i met someone tonight
oh christ i do n't know what to do
her name is clementine and she 's amazing
so alive and spontaneous and passionate and sensitive
things with naomi and i have been stagnant for so long
mary
what are you doing here
she came to help howard
i tried that already
did you try going through c gate
yeah
of course
you get some sleep howard
i 'll take it from here
yeah probably a good idea
howard they 've disappeared again
oh dear
i 'll go out for a smoke
if no one minds
that 's fine stan
so i 've got to drop the van off
thanks stan
thanks
she should not have done this stan
as mad as she was
as justifiably --
i do n't know what you 're talking about howard
mary has stolen our files and is sending them back to people
jesus
the voltage looks fine
then check the connections
does that help
yeah that looks better
thanks
it 's an apartment
not a dump then but kind of plain
uninspired
and there 's a stale smell
sort of stuffy
i do n't know
stuffy
patrick let 's just get through this
we have a long night ahead of us
yeah
yeah
just wanted to let you know
i like mary
i like when she comes to visit
i just do n't think she likes me
she likes you okay
i wonder if i should invite my girlfriend over too
i have a girlfriend now
you can if you want
did i tell you i have a new girlfriend
this one 's history
moving on
the thing is
my situation is a little weird
my girlfriend situation
patrick we need to focus
i got ta tell you something
i kind of fell in love with her last night
she was unconscious patrick
she was beautiful
so sweet and funky and voluptuous
i kind of stole a pair of her panties is what
jesus patrick
mary hates me
i 've never been popular with the ladies
maybe if you stopped stealing their panties
okay there 's more stan --
what 's your bartlett 's
it 's a quote book
hold on
let me ask my friend
stan can i leave for a little while
my girlfriend is very --
patrick we 're in the middle of --
she 's right in the neighborhood
she 's upset
but i do n't know how to polka
neither do i
ha ha ho ho hee hee
what was that
clockworks
clockworks
the clockworks is one reason that i am here on siwash ridge
i accepted the invitation to be initiated as a shaman by an aged siwash chief who was the principle outside confederate of the clock people
siwash huh
he was a degenerated warlock who could turn urine into beer and the honor that he extended me gave me rights of occupancy in this sacred cave on this far away siwash ridge
i came to the dakota hills to construct a clockworks of my own
but unlike the clockworks of the clock people my ticks more accurately echo the ticks of the universe
... ha ha ho ho and hee hee
the clock people
during the second world war i busted out of tule lake detention camp as a japanese american i had been put there and watched over
i found refuge with the clock people who discovered me in a snow bank near dead i had been climbing across the sierra nevada mountains
then if you are japanese then why are you called the chink
the clock people mistook me for chinese
and the name stuck
in the same way that all indian tribes came to be labeled indians through the ignorance of an italian sailor with a taste for oranges it is only fitting that indians misnamed me
the clock people however are not a tribe rather they are a gathering of indians from various tribes
they have lived together since 1906
what do you believe in then
ha ha ho ho and hee hee
is everything getting worse
yes everything is getting worse
but everything is also getting better
the countess has come to our aid
the rubber rose ranch is officially deeded to all the cowgirls
and i have been asked to oversee the ranch
for 300 a week
and as it turns out the countess is not going to be the vegetable the doctors thought he was
here 's a picture
i want to go back to the clock people
i kind of miss those fool redskins and wonder what they 're up to
what 's happened to jelly
she had a one way ticket to kansas city
you mean she 's dead
suppose that you bear five or six children with your characteristics
all in siwash cave
in a postcatastrophe world your offspring would of necessity intermarry forming in time a tribe
a tribe every member of which had giant thumbs
a tribe of big thumbs would relate to the environment in very special ways
it could not use weapons or produce sophisticated tools
it would have to rely on its wits and its senses
it would have to live with animals -- and plants
-- as virtual equals
it 's extremely pleasant to me to think about a tribe of physical eccentrics living peacefully with animals and plants learning their languages perhaps and paying them the respect they deserve
how am i going to be the progenitor of a tribe when i 'm living on an isolated ridgetop with delores
that 's your problem
where do you live miss hankshaw
i 'm staying with the countess
i know but where do you reside when you are n't visiting new york
i do n't
you do n't
well no i do n't reside anywhere in particular
i just keep moving
a traveler eh
you might say that although i do n't think of it as traveling
where are the others
oh rupert and carla had a little hassle and went home
welcome podner
by god it 's great to have you here
it 's an honor
sorry i took so long getting to you but we 've had a mess of hard work these past few days -- and a heap of planning to do
er you seem to know who i am and maybe even what i am
thanks for the breakfast
oh i know about sissy hankshaw all right
i 've done a little hitchhiking myself
ah shucks that 's like telling annie oakley you 're a sharpshooter because you once knocked a tomato can off a stump with a fieldstone
i 'd heard tales about you from people i 'd meet in jail cells and truckstops
i heard about your uh your ah your wonderful thumbs and i heard how you were jack kerouac 's girl friend
no i 'm afraid that part is n't true
jack was in awe of me and tracked me down
we spent a night talking and hugging in a corn field but he was hardly my lover
besides i always travel alone
well that does n't matter that part never interested me anyway
the beatnicks were before my time and i never got anything outta the hippies but bad dope clichs and the clap
but the example of your life helped me in my struggle to be a cowgirl
tell me about it
about
about being a cowgirl
what 's it all about
when you say the word you make it sound like it was painted in radium on the side of a pearl
cowgirls exist as an image
a fairly common image
the idea of cowgirls especially for little girls prevails in our culture
therefore it seems to me the existence of cowgirls should prevail
otherwise they 're being fooled
in the rodeo hall of fame in oklahoma city there are just two cowgirls
two
and both of 'em are trick riders
trick riding is what cowgirls have almost always done in rodeos
our society sure likes to see its unconventional women do tricks
that 's what prostitutes call it you know tricking
you 're political then
no ma'am
no way
there 's girls on the rubber rose who are political but i do n't share their views
i got no cowgirl ideology to expound
politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it
that 's jellybean
from men the whooping crane has received neither love nor respect
men have drained the crane 's marshes stolen its eggs invaded its privacy polluted its food fouled its air blown it apart with buckshot
looks like every time we get together things are in a mess
so be it
it looks serious this time though
all these guns
are you actually prepared to kill and die for whooping cranes
hell no the cranes are wonderful okay but i 'm not in this for whooping cranes
i 'm in it for cowgirls
if we cowgirls give in to authority on this crane issue then cowgirls become just another compromise
i want a finer fate than that -- for me and for every other cowgirl
better no cowgirls at all than cowgirls compromised
how did this business get started anyhow
why are the birds nesting here
no i guess not
drugged is a stupid word
but the peyote is obviously affecting their brains
it 's made them break a migratory pattern that goes back thousands of years
every time i tell you that i love you you flinch
but that 's your problem
if i flinch when you say you love me it 's both our problems
my confusion becomes your confusion
students confuse teachers patients confuse psychiatrists lovers with confused hearts confuse lovers with clear hearts
extraordinary
she 's obviously that
jesus
which would you rather have a million dollars or one of sissy 's thumbs full of pennies
oh you
i 'm not talking about her hands
they 're difficult to ignore i confess but i 'm speaking of her whole being
her whole being is extraordinary
the way she talks for example
she 's so articulate
it 's high time you realized honey babe that a woman does n't have to give the best years of her life to radcliffe or smith in order to speak the english language
countess
i 'm really in a dither
she 's turned my head
ninety degrees to the left i hope
how does she feel about you
i think she 's disappointed that i 'm not more ah sort of atavistic
she 's got some naive sentimental notions about indians
i 'm sure she liked me though but
then she left town
she always leaves town you dummy
that does n't mean anything
what about in bed
how does she like it in bed
how does she like what in bed
like what
what do you think
well
er
shit o dear julian
do you mean to tell me you did n't get it on
oh we did n't get it all the way on
whose fault was that
i suppose it was mine
yes it definitely was my fault
what do they do to you boys in those ivy league schools anyway
strap you down and pump the nature out of you
they can even press the last drop of nature out of a mohawk buck
why send a shaman or cannibal to yale for four years and all he 'd be fit for would be a desk in the military industrial complex and a seat in the third row at a neil simon comedy
jesus h.m.s. christ
if harvard or princeton could get hold of the chink for a couple of semesters they 'd turn him into a candidate for the bow tie wing of the hall of wimps
oogie boogie
if we ivy leaguers are n't earthy enough to suit you hillbillies at least we do n't go around indulging in racist terms such as chink
next thing i know you 'll be calling me chief
chink 's the guy 's name for christ 's sake
what guy
aw he 's some old fart holyman who lives in the hills out west
gives my ranch the creeps and the willies too
but though he be old and dirty he 's alive i 'll bet clear down to his toes
they do n't have his juice in a jar in new haven
well i suppose that i 'll have to write sissy out on the road
i 'm cold
here
i 'll turn down the air conditioner
it 's not the air conditioner that 's making me cold
nothing moves in here
not even your birds
thanks
american cheese
the king of road food
are you in show business
i was a successful model once
for magazines
i was the yoni yum feminine hygiene dew girl from 1965 to 1970 but got laid off
so now you 're bummin around
yep
hitchhiking
i 'm the best
you 're the best
when i was younger i hitchhiked one hundred and twenty seven hours without stopping without food or sleep crossed the continent twice in six days cooled my thumbs in both oceans and caught rides after midnight on unlighted highways
whooee
as i developed however i grew more concerned with subtleties and nuances of style
time in terms of m.p.h. no longer interested me
i began to hitchhike in something akin to geological time slow ancient vast
when i am really moving stopping car after car after car moving so freely so clearly so delicately that even the sex maniacs and the cops can only blink and let me pass then i embody the rhythms of the universe
i am in a state of grace
to my own special sissy
cheers
and welcome
so my letter brought ya flying eh
where were you
salt lake city
la conner
well i may have a little surprise for you
but first tell me about yourself
it 's been six months has n't it
in some circles that 's half a year
how are you
tired
that 's the very first time in the eons that i 've known you that i 've ever heard you complain
and now you 're tired poor darling
a born freak can only go uphill
freak schmeek
most of us are freaks in one way or another
try being born a male russian countess into a white middle class baptist family in mississippi and you 'll see what i mean
i 've always been proud of the way nature singled me out
it 's the people who have been deformed by society i feel sorry for
i 've been steady moving for eleven years and some months
maybe i should rest up for a spell i 'm not as young as i used to be
shit o goodness you wo n't be thirty for another year and you 're more beautiful than ever
does that mean you might have an assignment for me
you were the yoni yum girl from let 's see from nineteen sixty eight through nineteen seventy
you 've always smelled so nice
like a little sister
the irony has just killed me
you the dew girl one of the few girls who does n't need dew
i loath the stink of females
they are so sweet the way god made them then they start fooling around with men and soon they 're stinking
like rotten mushrooms like an excessively chlorinated swimming pool like a tuna fish 's retirement party
they all stink
from the queen of england to bonanza jellybean they stink
bonanza jellybean
what
oh yes
tee hee
jellybean
she 's a young thing who works on my ranch
real name is sally jones or something wooden like that
she 's cute as a hot fudge taco and of course it takes verve to change one 's name so charmingly
but she stinks like a slut just the same
your ranch
oh my dear yes i bought a little ranch out west sort of a tribute to the women of america who have cooperated with me in eliminating their odor by using my vaginal products dew spray mist and yoni yum spray powder
a tax write off actually
sissy sissy blushing bride you can desist from wearing paths in those forgotten highways
the countess has arranged a job for you
and what a job
a job for me
i am once more about to make advertising history
and only you the original yoni yum dew girl could possibly assist me
the food and drug administration said wednesday female deodorant sprays may cause such harmful reactions as blisters burns and rashes
although the fda judges that the reported reactions are not sufficient to justify removal of these products from the market they are sufficient to warrant the proposed mandatory label warnings
shit o dear that 's enough to make me asthmatic
the nerve of those twits
what do they know about female odor
do n't interrupt
here 's my concept
my ranch out west
it 's a beauty ranch
oh it 's got a few head of cattle for atmosphere and tax purposes
but it 's a beauty ranch a place where unhappy women -- divorcees and widows mainly -- can go to lose weight remove wrinkles change their hair styles and pretty themselves up for the next disappointment
my ranch is named the rubber rose after the rubber rose douche bag my own invention and bless its little red bladder the most popular douche bag in the world
so get this
it 's on the migratory flight path of the whooping cranes
the last flock of wild whooping cranes left in existence
well these cranes stop off at my little pond -- siwash lake it 's called -- twice a year autumn and spring and spend a few days each time resting up eating doing whatever whooping cranes do
i 've never seen them understand but i hear they 're magnificent
very big specimens -- i mean huge mothers -- and white as snow to coin a phrase except for black tips on their wings and tail feathers and bright red heads
now whooping cranes in case you did n't know it are noted for their mating dance
it 's just the wildest show in nature
it 's probably the reason why birdwatching used to be so popular with old maids and deacons
picture these rare beautiful gigantic birds in full dance -- leaping six feet off the mud arching their backs flapping their wings strutting low to the ground
dears it 's overwhelming
and picture the birds doing their sex dance on tv
right there on the home screen creation 's most elaborate sex ritual -- yet clean and pure enough to suit the pope
with lovely sissy hankshaw in the foreground
in a white gown red hood attached and big feathery sleeves trimmed in black
in a very subdued imitation of the female whooping crane she dance walks over to a large nest in which there sits a can of yoni yum
and a can of dew
off camera a string quartet is playing debussy
a sensuous voice is reading a few poetic lines about courtship and love
are you starting to get it
does n't it make the hair on your neck stand up and applaud
my very goodness gracious
grandiose lyrical erotic and girl scout- oriented you ca n't top it
i 've hired a crew of experts from walt disney studios the best wildlife cinematographers around
you 're my eternal favorite
princess grace herself could n't be better not even if she had your personality which she does n't anyway dear i 'm out of photography now and into water colors
ah how circuitous conversation is
we 're back at the beginning
the exact man i 've wanted you to meet is my artist the watercolorist
if you do n't want me to pose for him why do you want me to meet him
purely personal
i believe you might enjoy one another
but countess
now now
do n't get exasperated
i realize that you 've always avoided all but the most rudimentary involvements with men and i might add you 've been wise
heterosexual relationships seem to lead only to marriage
for men marriage is a matter of efficient logistics the male gets his food bed laundry tv pussy offspring and creature comforts all under one roof where he does n't have to dissipate his psychic energy thinking about them too much then he is free to go out and fight the battles of life which is what existence is all about
but for a woman marriage is surrender
ballast
i am your best friend
i am a lifesaver and a heartbreaker
that means top secret cooper
i heard it
i can see why they sent you along
so if the ship did n't blow up what happened
you still need the rope
i thought you were one a those spacemen with ice in ya veins
i 'd rather be on the rope and not need it than need it and not have it
now step aside old man
... do you copy
uh yeah coop i 'm still here
shit
do not do that
where the fuck are you
i 'm in the second containment area
it 's pitch black in here
there must have been a coolant leak
man this shit is everywhere
i ca n't see a damn thing
holy shit
justin
i think i found something
time to play spam in the can
do n't start with me cooper
okay listen up
as you all know by now we have an addition to our crew
dr. weir this is starck navigation smith pilot justin ship 's engineer --
you can call him baby bear he loves that
this is cooper what the hell do you do on this ship anyway
... come on skipper i already put my shoes on
you 've had plenty eva coop it 's justin 's turn
stay on station
if anything happens
i 'll be all over it
we have a man down
coop where are you
the containment second containment
hold on coop
but justin
i 'll get him
captain miller we 're ready to repressurize the clark
on my way
... and the gravity drive goes where no man has gone before
you prep the gravity couches
i 'm going to manually arm those explosives
will it work
it worked for weir
prep the tanks
you been out there a long time
trying to break my record
i 'd rather spend the next twelve hours outside than another five minutes in this can
this ship is bad
it watches you
what
you heard me
this ship it 's crazy trying to go faster'n light that 's like the tower of babel
shit smith you 're going biblical on me
you know what happened to the tower of babel do n't you
it fell down
you 're sucking too much nitrogen in your mix
we 'll have to re route through the port conduit to the apu
what about the accumulator
it 's holding
she 's holding
we 're still venting trace gasses gimme twenty minutes to plug the hole
the event horizon only had life support for eighteen months
it seems impossible but in light of the transmission
i have to think that someone has managed to endure until now
skipper do we get hazard pay for this
it was like
nothing was there
and then justin appeared and the core
became metal
no he did n't
you were n't there
i saw it
saw what mr. cooper
what did you really see because what you 're describing is not physically possible
i do n't know what happened to justin
i 'm telling you i saw it
what you saw could have been an optical effect caused by gravitational distortion
i know what i saw and it was n't a fucking optical effect
is that an offer
it is not
what 's happening
i do n't know the screens are dead
let me breathe let me breathe
you 're okay now it 's over
how
the bridge is gone
there must be a way
what about engineering
can you shut it down
i do n't know the process dr. weir was the expert
i do n't want to go where the last crew went
i 'd rather be dead
i 'm gon na activate the emergency beacon
hurry
we have n't tested the air yet
it could be contaminated
no time
we need whatever 's left in our suits to repair the clark
like it or not this is the only oxygen for three billion kilometers
how is he
his vitals are stable but he 's unresponsive to stimuli
he might wake up in fifteen minutes
he might not wake up at all
carbon dioxide poisoning produces hallucinations impaired judgement
goddammit dj it was not a hallucination
i saw a man he was on fire
and then he disappeared
to conserve our oxygen we should severely restrict our activity
anyone who can should get some sleep
i do n't need sleep dj
i need answers
he 'll live
if we ever make it back
we 'll make it
of course not
justin just climbed into the airlock because he felt like it
just one of those things
i swore i 'd never lose another man
i came close today
real close
another man
who
i i tried to go back for him to save him but i could n't get to him in time
the fire
have you ever seen fire in zero gravity
it 's like a liquid it slides over everything
it was like a wave breaking over him a wave of fire
and then he was gone
i never told anyone until now
but this ship knew dj
it knows about the goliath it knows about corrick
it knows our secrets
it knows what we 're afraid of
and now you 're going to tell me it 's carbon dioxide
no
what is it
i 've been listening to the transmission
and i think houston made a mistake in the translation
go on
dj
the clark 's gone
smith and cooper are dead
what happened
weir
he used one of the explosives from the corridor
please
oh god dj what do i
how do i
please
kill
oh god
what 's wrong
nothing
it 's nothing
what 's happening
a power drain --
what 's wrong
you did n't hear it
you must have heard it
i 've got a pulse he 's alive
pressure
90 over 50 and falling
he 's crashing
intubate pure oxygen feed get the nitrogen out of his blood
his peritoneum has ruptured
one thing at a time let 's keep him breathing
start the drip 15cc 's fibrinogen christ he 's bleeding out
you wanted to see me admiral
i apologize for the short notice bill but we 've had something come up that requires your immediate attention
lyle
it 's against my better judgement but i 'll run this by the man downstairs
you 'll know my decision by the end of the day
thank you
do n't thank me bill
i 'm not doing you any favors
it 's not that simple
lyle play the recording for dr. weir
navigation control tried to hail the vessel
this was the only response
you 're not seriously considering sending him
you do n't just dismiss bill weir
the man held oppenheimer 's chair at princeton
if the event horizon had worked he would have gone down in history as the greatest mind in physics since einstein
the official inquiry blamed weir 's design for the ship 's loss
that does n't mean a damn thing
they were looking for a scapegoat and weir fit the bill
but he 's not responsible for what happened to the ship
does he know that
what 's on your mind
he does n't belong on this mission
responsible or not he blames himself
he 's too close to it
and then there 's his wife
it 's been two years since she died
he 's over it
some things you do n't get over
i want our best people on this
where 's miller
the lewis and clark just returned from patrol in the asteroid belt she 's docked in bay four
what justin what shows you
it wo n't stop it goes on and on and on
what does
the dark inside me
... it 's inside and it eats and eats until there 's nothing left
the dark inside
i do n't understand
from the other place
oh my god oh my god
starck
... is zero
that 's what the singularity does it folds space so that point a and point b coexist in the same space and time
after the ship passes through this gateway space returns to normal
it 's called a gravity drive
how do you know all this
i built it
everything green on my boards skipper
start the countdown
okay
we do it the hard way
deck by deck room by room
starck deploy the umbilicus
i believe you 're up for a walk mr. justin
go get your bonnet on
yes sir
justin finish your sweep
almost done i just got ta check one thing
patch me through to him
justin
skipper you got ta help me
... i do n't want to die
you 're not going to die
not today
i want you to do exactly as i say and i 'm gon na get you out of there alright
but i ca n't
i got ta get out of here
skipper please
justin
i wo n't let you die
this is weir
dr. weir admiral hollis would like to see you as soon as possible
dr. weir you have no experience with salvage procedures
i designed the ship 's propulsion system
i am the only person capable of evaluating the performance of the gravity drive
you ca n't send a search and rescue team out there alone and expect them to succeed
that would be like
like sending an auto- mechanic to work on the shuttle
i can understand your desire to redeem your reputation dr. weir but it does n't factor into this
this is not about my reputation
this is not about me at all
the event horizon was created for one reason to go faster than light
imagine mankind exploring new solar systems colonizing new worlds
seven years ago we did n't just lose the ship and the crew
we lost the dream
i have to go
since the initial transmission there 's been no further contact
just the beacon every two minutes
the crew
could they still be alive
the ship had life support systems for eighteen months
they 're been gone seven years
someone sent that message
admiral you have to put me on that ship
jesus its huge
ice crystals everywhere
this place is a deep freeze
that means they did n't abandon ship
so where are they
starck any luck with the bio scan
peters is right no one 's here
i do n't know this place is really dark i ca n't see a thing
i can see the hatch
starck you still showing those readings
the blood came from somewhere peters
there 's no one here skipper
okay
i 'm on the bridge
what you got peters
everything 's been shut down
conserving power i guess
green light on the hull it 's intact
the science workstation has power i 'll see if i can find the crew from here
i found one
alive
frozen
peters i want you to go through the ship 's log see if we ca n't find some answers
i can use the station in medical keep an eye on justin
fine
starck i want you to repeat the bio scan
i can run the image through a series of filters try to clean it up
do it
that 's a negative starck
justin
peters
we need to know what happened to the crew
before it happens to us
i 'll get back to the log
but on the bridge i wo n't go back back in there
thanks
captain miller i just want to say
the clock is running dr. weir
if you 'll follow the rest of the crew they 'll show you to the gravity tanks
captain miller i appreciate this opportunity
doctor weir my crew is not going on your mission because we want to
we were pulled off a well deserved leave to be sent out to the middle of nowhere and no one 's even told us why
i 've been authorized to brief you and the crew once we reach neptune space
until then do what you 're told and stay out of my way
it was the ship 's maiden voyage to test the drive
the event horizon moved to safe distance using ion thrusters
they received the go ahead to activate the gravity drive
and the ship vanished from all our scopes
no radar contact no enhanced optical no radio contact of any kind
they disappeared without a trace
until now
where has it been for the last seven years
that 's what we 're here to find out
what does it say
nsa encryption specialists have deciphered some of the message
you 're in the central corridor
it connects the personnel areas to engineering
peters and i will search the forward decks
justin take engineering
no hot dogging not on this one alright
i can see that what 're they for
in an emergency the charges detonate in series destroying the central section and separating the personnel areas from the rest of the ship
that way if the gravity drive malfunctions the crew could use the foredecks as a lifeboat
easy peters we 're okay we 're okay
let 's finish the sweep
captain miller the foredecks are just ahead
any survivors
negative
no one
they 're empty dr. weir
moving forward
it beats dying mister smith
dr. weir 's right
get on board the event horizon
i 'll meet you at the airlock
yes
one of my men is down
i want to know what happened to him
hold on what 's this gravitational distortion
it 's possible that a burst of gravity waves escaped from the core distorting space time
they could be what hit the lewis and clark
what could cause them
what 's in the core
it 's complicated
how much time do you need
we have seventeen hours and forty two minutes
now what is in the core
you have something dr. weir
the date
what about it
the event horizon 's computer think 's it 's 2034
it 's 2041
exactly
the ship 's internal clock is off by seven years
explanation
intense gravitational fields effect the passage of time it 's possible
black holes make sense on paper it 's all math you see but as to what really happened
the event horizon has passed beyond our plane of reality and like lazarus returned from the dead
what the hell is that
dr. weir
i do n't know
we barely have enough power for life support as it is if we ca n't stop the drain we 're not gon na make it
the core
we do n't get the power back our air 's gon na go bad
check the core for radiation
carbon dioxide may be the least of our worries
we 're a long way from home and we 're in a bad place
let 's not make it worse
if anyone has any constructive suggestions now is the time
i think i can stabilize the fields around the singularity that should prevent another power drain
do it
is that your expert opinion
the only answer we 've had out of you is i do n't know
justin just tried to kill himself
the man is clearly insane
i want to know what caused that noise
i want to know why one of my crew tried to throw himself out of the airlock
thermal changes in the hull could have caused the metal to expand and contract very suddenly causing reverberations --
that 's bullshit and you know it
you built this fucking ship and all i 've heard from you is bullshit
what do you want me to say
you said this ship creates a gateway
yes
to what
where did this ship go
where did you send it
i do n't know
where has it been for the past seven years
i do n't know
the other place what is that
i don't know
i do n't know
there 's a lot of things going on here that i do n't understand
truth takes time
that 's exactly what we do n't have doctor
you ca n't leave
she wo n't let you
just get your gear back onto the lewis and clark doctor or you 'll find yourself looking for a ride home
i told you
she wo n't let you leave
son of a bitch
your eyes
i do n't need them anymore
where we 're going we wo n't need eyes to see
what are you talking about
do you know what a singularity is miller
does your mind truly fathom what a black hole is
it is nothing
absolute and eternal nothing
and if god is everything then i have seen the devil
it 's a liberating experience
if you miss me you 'll blow out the hull
you 'll die too
what makes you think i 'll miss
weir is dead
then who the fuck are you
your fear
do you remember the goliath miller
what are you
you know
you want me to believe you 're the devil well i do n't that 's bullshit
i 'm not the devil
then what what are you
tell me
better if i just show you
there is no devil
there is no god
there is only
nothing
you 're lying
i 'm not asking you to believe me
you 'll see for yourself
and so will your crew
you 're all coming with me
starck
cooper
you ca n't have them
go to hell
nooo
heading three three four
... make your approach vector negative fourteen degrees
one four degrees
we have a lock on the event horizon 's navigation beacon
it 's in the upper ionosphere we 're in for some chop
bring us in tight
starck get on the horn see if anyone 's listening
we 're all on edge smith
we 're a long way out
that 's not it
that ship was built to go faster than light
that 's just wrong it goes against everything we know
what are you trying to say
if god had intended man to fly he would have given us wings
something like that yeah
i guess we 're about to find out
keep us slow and steady
yes sir
dr. weir
we 've got some weather
i noticed
starck anybody home
1500 meters
we 're getting too close
where is it
proximity warning
900 800 meters 700
we 're right on top of it we 're gon na hit
starck
put it through tacs
smith you up for a flyby
love to
do we have enough time for a weld
we do n't have time to fart
we 're losing pressure at 280 liters a second and our oxygen tanks are cracked
in three minutes our atmosphere will be gone
we are fucking dead
no one 's dying on my watch smith
what about the reserve tanks
they 're gone
but
you heard me smith
peters are you with me
captain miller you copy
i 'm here smith how 's the clark
i 've found a six inch fracture in the outer hull
we should be able to repair it and re pressurize it 's gon na take some time
we do n't have time smith
in twenty hours we run out of air
understood
... you break all the laws of physics you think there wo n't be a price
you already killed the first crew
that 's enough
sir
get outside go back to work
i 'll join you shortly
thank you
captain we got a problem
now what
she was right behind me i turn around she 's gone
she could be anywhere
alright
prep the clark for launch
i 'll find her
skipper
what is it smith
i just saw weir i think he was messing around on the clark
smith get out of there
come again skipper
one of the explosives is missing from the corridor
i think weir may have put it on the clark
we 're past the outer marker we can engage the ion drive whenever you 're ready
justin
ion drive will engage in
t minus ten minutes
let 's go
starck why are n't you on the bridge
i just finished drying
then what are you doing here
come on people let 's go
and cooper
put some pants on
crossing the horizon
optimum approach angle is fourteen degrees
come around to three three four
something 's wrong with the bio scan
radiation interference
there 's not enough radiation to throw off the scan
i 'm picking up trace life forms but i ca n't get a lock on the location
that 's an affirmative
keep your eyes open
everybody okay
we 're all here
okay
let 's find out how much time we just bought
it tastes bad
but you can breathe it
maybe one of the original crew
no
it was someone else
who
dr. weir you were right there you must have heard something seen something
miller
what is it starck
... i ran the bio scan with the dna rna filter
the results were bio readings of indeterminate origin
bio readings of indeterminate origin do n't you have anything useful to tell me
i 've got a theory
go ahead
there was a another surge in the bio- readings right before you
you saw what you saw
we picked up a similar readings right before the clarke was damaged
what if there were a connection between the two
the gravity waves the hallucination all part of an defensive reaction like an immune system
you 've got to listen
to what
what are you saying
this ship is alive
i did n't say that i said the bio- readings correspond to what happened to you the ship is reacting to us
we 're hanging on by our fingernails and you 're giving me bullshit stories
it 's not bullshit it 's the only conclusion the data supports
starck do you know how crazy that sounds
it 's impossible
i know that
if you knew it was impossible then why 'd you waste my time
i thought you wanted an answer
and that 's the only one i have
what i want is to survive the next ten hours
nine hours and twenty two minutes
i 'm going outside to work on the clark
and starck
do n't tell anyone what you just told me
we 've got enough to worry about
miller come in
what 's going on in there starck
justin 's in the airlock
tuck yourself into a crouched position shut your eyes as tight as you can
five seconds
weir ca n't be alive
whatever was on that bridge was n't weir
weir activated the drive
he 's sending us to the other place
we 've got to shut it down we 've got to
blow the fucker up
blow it up
we blow the corridor
use the foredecks as a lifeboat separate it from the rest of the ship
we stay put
i 'll do it --
no
i 'll be right back
we 're armed
this fucker 's ready to blow
... repeat we 're armed
miller he 's back he was in the tank
weir
he 's dead
first time in a grav couch
yes
here 's another one
they 're all over the place
they 're explosive charges
dr. weir what 's this the door to
you 're at the bridge ms. peters
you still have n't seen any crew
yes we can see some kind of mist
what is that
blood
looks like arterial spray
can you see a body
there 's no one here
no
i saw nothing
i did
about an hour ago
in medical
i saw my son
he was lying on one of the examination tables and his legs were
is n't it possible that you were traumatized by finding the body on the bridge
i 've seen bodies before
this is different
there 's no one in the corridor but us
not according to the computer
he 's engaged the override
can you shut it down
yes
yes justin we heard it
keep him talking
do you know what it was
you got any coffee
it 's cold
i do n't care
hey
say this paper represents space time and you want to get from point a here
to point b here
now what 's the shortest distance between two points
where is she
dead ahead 5000 meters
jesus that is one big ugly fat fucker
she 's not ugly
foredecks
crew quarters bridge medical and science labs hydroponics what have you
that central section connects the forward decks to the engineering containment area
can we move in closer
shit doc any closer and we 're gon na need a rubber
what the hell is that
that 's the core the gravity drive
the heart of the ship
the safety circuit 's failed
we 're losing atmosphere
what
it still has air and reserve power we can activate gravity and life support
30 hours to neptune orbit
all boards are green everything 's five by five
you ca n't do that
the law of relativity prohibits faster- than light travel
this is u.s. aerospace command vessel lewis and clark hailing event horizon event horizon do you read
this is the lewis and clark hailing
matching speed
now
range to target ten thousand meters and closing
skipper i got a bad feeling about this
if they are they 're screening their calls
range 3000 meters and closing
the scope is lit it 's right in front of us
1000 meters
range 500 meters and holding
turbulence is dropping off
picking up magnetic interference
what happened to his eyes
explosive decompression
decompression would n't do that
miller do you read me peters --
get them back --
i 'm trying goddammit --
a straight line
wrong
the shortest distance between two points
the reactor 's still hot
we 've got several small radiation sources leaks probably
nothing serious
do they have pressure
affirmative
the hull 's intact
but there 's no gravity and the thermal units are off line
i 'm showing deep cold
the crew could n't survive unless they were in stasis
could it be the crew
if they were in suspended animation would n't that effect the scan
if they were in stasis i 'd get a location but these readings they 're all over the ship
it does n't make any sense
what is it
ship 's log
what is it
i do n't know
the life readings just went off the scale
that 's how the gravity drive works you see it focuses the black hole 's immense gravitational power to create the gateway
that 's how the event horizon travels faster than light
i ca n't believe we built this
why dr. weir i think you 're in love
hmmm
claire used to tell me i loved the event horizon more than i loved her
i told her that was n't true i just knew the event horizon better that 's all
claire is your wife
yes
it must be hard being so far away from her
yes
i miss her
she died
two years now
i 'm sorry
maybe a power interruption crashed the system
no there 's no evidence of a surge or spike of any kind
it 's as if time just
stopped for seven years
what is it
the forward airlock
miller smith cooper any of you in the airlock
justin said something about the dark inside me
what did he mean
it means nothing
i do n't think she 's real big on hate
you would n't say that if you could see me
such a sad face
you know sometimes being different is n't a bad thing
trust me this ai n't one of those times
how 'd you know it was me
i 'm blind not deaf
wanna come in
i 'm not really dressed for a party
relax it 's casual
no i mean
i 'm a little
dusty
those yours too
my step dad 's
i 'm strictly into stone
i was wondering when you 'd walk by
we 're going to have to work on your touch
i like the sound of that
way to not overthink it
so when do we leave
i 'll schedule the launch
call me in the morning to talk about resources and crew
i can handle the ship
i can even handle mr. blonde ambition
but i do n't know if i should be flying or playing vegas in these suits
who the hell came up with them
victor did
we can monitor the cloud 's approach and observe the tests from here
is it safe
i can only stay for one drink ben
i 've got to meet with victor
would n't want to keep vic waiting
we need to give you a physical so we know what got zapped
well why did n't you say so
you want me to lift some weights or something
you look like an eighties rock band
the suit will stretch
you should try it --
i would n't be caught dead in that
he did n't
oh he did
what did he do to the uniform
he did n't mean it
you know johnny
he 's always been a hothead --
it 's not him
it 's them
i ca n't live like this
just give reed a little more time
you know how he works -- analyzing every little step before he takes one --
it 's easy for you to be patient
no it 's not
i thought i was done waiting for reed
we 're all in this together now ben
ben come in
what is this
where 's reed
where do you think
with sue
what do you want vic
to help you
i 've run every test known to man
and they all yield the same result the machine is ready
reed said it 'd be weeks till --
he also said we 'd avoid that storm in space
and we know how that turned out
he could n't generate enough power for the machine to reach critical mass
yet another mistake for mr. fantastic
and you can
power it up
i 'll be watching over you
just get back soon or i start looking for a new groom
soon as i 'm back i 'm gon na trade that in for a bigger rock
i do n't care about rocks i care about you
you bring him back in one piece or you can forget being best man
deb
it 's me
i need you to step out front
out front
you home baby
i got a surprise for you
ben
do n't come any closer for a sec
this is gon na be kind of a shock
you remember when we said together forever no matter what
baby you 're scaring me
good thing it ai n't workin
reed what are we doing here
this guy 's fast food strip mall science --
this was n't our first stop in case you forgot nasa
and victor 's not that bad
he 's just a little
larger than life
he 's financed some of the biggest breakthroughs of this century
you 'd never know it
i ca n't take this
ben
this is business
just work
what about his first born
ben the money 's not important
we could save lives
he knew about nasa
what if he made the call to shut us down --
ben think about all the people we can help if this works --
maybe you should think about yourself for once
you always let this guy push you round --
we got what we wanted
that 's enough
i know i know
i 'm just worried about what he wants
speaking of which
ca n't do it
i can not do it
external srbs orbital system engines
its just like the shuttles you flew in --
no
i can not take orders from that underwear model
that wingnut washed out of nasa for sneaking two victoria secret wannabes into a flight simulator
youthful high spirits
they crashed it into a wall
a flight simulator
i 'm sure he 's matured since then
when have i asked you to do something you absolutely said you could not do
five times
i had it at four
this makes five
i ai n't done arranging your flowers egghead
ben
this is serious
turn around
how long was i out
three days
i was worried about you
how are you feeling
solid
i do n't know
i just keep going over and over the numbers
reed
even you ca n't compute every little thing
i should have done more run more tests --
you go through something like this makes you appreciate having the right woman in your life
yeah you and debbie and perfect --
reed i 'm not talking about debbie
what
come on
she 's got a good thing with victor --
i 'm sorry did that cosmic bath loosen your screws
he 's smart powerful successful --
well maybe you should date him
are you alright
i think i need to lie down
bad shrimp
what the --
ben
are you okay
am i okay
you wanna explain that
we had a tough year
yeah nine years straight
it 's about to be a broken face
this is n't permanent johnny
we need to be careful until we 're normal again
ben --
oh you remember my name do you
you happen to remember what you swore to do with every breath in your body
we 're working as hard as we can --
yeah
i can tell
victor was right
glad nothing could take you away from your work
ben i do n't know if this thing'll change us back or make us worse
i need you to be patient for a little while longe--
time for your lesson vic
chem 101 what happens when you supercool hot metal
ben
got it teach
ben i 've been crunching the numbers on the machine
i think if we can rework the power settings
forget it egghead
i 'm good as is
what the hell you smiling at
just keep your mouth shut and your mind on those smbs --
actually the engines are smes
hydrogenbase carbon propellant
couple generations past your last ride
i 'm not as dumb as you look
if you behave maybe next time daddy'll let you drive
keep talking there wo n't be a next time
please tell me your dawg 's not trying to rekindle things with my sister
course not
strictly business
yeah well his eyes say different
hey two hearts got busted last time
maybe she 's not over it either
let 's see you got victor stud of the year more coin than god
or reed the world 's dumbest smart guy worth less than a postage stamp
hmmm it 's a toss up
put your tiny little mind at ease
do n't you wander off boy
they said that 's not such a good idea the shock alone could --
give me the god damn mirror
hey
that 's a prototype
go back to the drawing board
the machine works
and vic 's gone mister hyde on us --
really
with a name like von doom
never saw that one coming
no more cracks about how i look
hey i 'm mr. sensitivity now
clear the way wide load coming through
your tissue your organs your entire biophysical structure is changing
every system is still functioning somehow --
and they 're changing into
i do n't really know
a compound organic metallic alloy
stronger than titanium or carbon steel
harder than diamonds --
like the shields reed said would protect us
how long
at this rate the infection should be complete in two maybe three weeks --
what do you mean complete
i wish i could tell you
i ca n't pretend to know what we 're dealing with here
i 'll notify the cdc and --
what
the center for disease control
if this thing is contagious --
but
this disease
is progressive
degenerative
that 's terrible news
and where do we think we 're going
i do n't know if we 've noticed but the sickest runs this side of the alps are right outside that window --
you 're on fire
not this again --
no you 're on fire
victor 's right
johnny get to the command center
close the shields
what about you
he 's not responsive --
ben
ben
now what is up with that
the cloud has fundamentally altered our dna
cool
what 'd it do to you guys
oh you dawg you
better not be my nurse
ben are you there
this is wrong in so many ways
you 've been working out
ben grimm is a genuine american hero who 's been through a terrible orde--
what he 's trying to say is every team needs a mascot
twenty
from outside the place looks a lot taller
oh it is
not only could you kill yourself but you could set fire to earth 's atmosphere and destroy all human life as we know it
gotcha
okay
supernova bad
is there something about flames
about flaming that you --
what are you trying to say
just because i dress well and like to dance --
what
no
i 'm trying to figure out why we each ended up with different symptoms
oh well that 's easy i 'm hot
you 're
well you 're a little limp
sue 's easy to see through
and ben 's always been a hardass
why are n't you writing this down
he 's right
these costumes are
missing something
i ca n't put my finger on it --
they 're not costumes
that 's what i 'm trying to calculate
and it 's not rubber
it 's muscle tendon
i seem to have the ability to manipulate the malleability of my molecular structure and redistribute my density to --
right whatever have fun
you need to control yourself and think before you --
act
here we go again
reed what if we got these gifts for a reason
what if we have some you know
like calling
a higher calling like getting girls and making money
johnny
supernova
but all these people
now
the synthetics act as a second skin adapting to your individual needs to --
keep the hot side hot and the cool side cool
apparently i can disappear
please tell me you go silent too
what is that thing
i think that thing is ben
wait
you mean there 's chance we could be full on-24 7-fantastic
grow up johnny
you want to run around on fire for the rest of your life
is that a trick question
c'mon i ca n't be the only one who thinks this is cool
you 're really cramping my style here
you were at 4000 kelvin
any hotter you 're approaching supernova --
sweet
that 's the temperature of the sun
uh we call my sister the invisible girl
the invisible girl
girl
i 'm driving
dude
that 's my sister
you 're gon na pay for that pebbles
what
you gave us names
what are you the face of the fantastic four now
you two need a time out
blockhead started it
johnny
did you see ben
yeah for the last time i hope
i 'm done with this freak show
i 'm moving back to the real world
is that what you call it
real
at least it beats living in a lab like somebody 's science project
what are you doing --
sis
let me take care of you for once
but johnny
you ca n't fly
if reed 's right then this little trip will double our stock offering
and if he 's not
reed 's always right
good thing he does n't always know what he 's got
they 're ready for you sir
showtime
our numbers are through the roof
the ipo 's tracking at fifty sixty a share
the bank 's five times oversubscribed --
it 's not just the money
i could make money in my sleep
then what is it
history leonard
history
everything else is conversation
how 's the other matter
leonard how 's the feed
recording sir
we see you perfectly
how 's the ipo
stable
we 're looking at low twenties
it 's a good number considering the fallout from --
reed 's disaster
you know i half- think he did this to me on purpose
sir i 'm sure he would n't put himself --
get me on the am shows larry king cover of the journal
i 've got to do something about this scar
make sure they only shoot my right side
actually uh people seem to think the scar humanizes you
and that 's a good thing
you know maybe you should get some rest --
later
first i 've got some unfinished business
a deal that needs closing
you 're you 've i mean how have you bee--
never better
those solar winds are flaring but i factored them into my coordinates and --
i was talking about us
working together
well uh based on our history
you can handle the biogenetics and i 'll focus on the molecular physics
or uhm maybe i should take the biotech you work the microscopes since you have some background in electropho--
right
that 's exactly what i meant
i uh think i remember the number
it 's been changed
as far as crew i was hoping ben could pilot the mission --
well he 's welcome to ride shotgun but we already have a pilot on our payroll
you remember my brother johnny
material made from self regulating unstable molecules
i 've been working on a formula for this
great minds think alike
feeling better
yes thanks
that 's good
that 's uh
good
you always had a way with words
i should be getting back
you 're happy for me and victor
i can tell you guys are enjoying what was the best part of our relationship --
which was
passion
it has to be the cloud
it 's fundamentally altered our dna
let 's not jump to conclusions we need a massive amount of evidence before making that leap
what
we need to get past them
sue
your clothes
lose them
what
oh
how come ben ca n't turn it on and off like us
that 's what we 're here to find out
if it happened to him then it could
it 's not invisibility per se
you 're bending the light around you with some kind of malleable force field
that 's what you projected on the bridge
what about you
you have n't eaten in days
how come you 're never on this side of the microscope
you should be able to bend light around other objects even people if you could control your emotional state better --
excuse me
i 'm saying if you had a little more self control you could locate the trigger
can you remember the exact emotions when --
anger
rage
frustration
okay
is there any way to duplicate that feeling
some memory or
i 'm sure i can come up with something
i 'm sorry i 'm sorry i did n't mean to do that
you must think that was some kind of latent hostility or --
what in the world would give me that idea
there were a lot of variables to consider --
no
there were n't
there was you
and me
no variables no math
it was actually the simplest thing in the world
but your head got in the way
like it always does
what are you doing
the plants from space
their particles are still charged
with the right amount of energy those ions could create the elemental profile of the cosmic storm
if we can build a machine to re create the storm we can reverse the polarity --
and reverse the mutations --
curing countless diseases not just ours
but we 're the focus right reed
reed
of course
of course
and you sure you can control this thing
last time did n't work out so well
with the right energy we can stabilize the storm
maybe tie into the city grid
reed
how close are we to a cure
no way to know
without more tests experiments
do n't let victor push you into making a mistake --
he was going to take away all my data equipment --
better than your life
victor 's not the one who has to get into that thing
we are
which is why i 'm working twenty hours a day checking every variable --
every variable but yourself
you do n't eat sleep
you ca n't live in your head like --
i 'm not the only one in there
i got you vic ben johnny all rattling around in there
i could get ben to tap into the baxter 's main power to generate enough voltage --
reed
shh
just be quiet
and look up
you always talked about how you liked the kind of man who could approach you
speak his mind
one who was n't afraid to tell you what he wanted
i did
i did reed
but i wanted you to be that man
when i walked out i waited ten minutes outside your door
ten
waiting for you to come find me
why did n't you say something
that would have kinda defeated the purpose
and reed
i 'm saying it now
i can
make it work
reed stop you need to rest your --
the power
i need
more power
to control
the storm --
you need a doctor
sue i need some of that anger rage frustration --
i 'm sure i can come up with something
i found a broken gasket from space --
a gasket
reed we 're at a party
but dreams do n't pay the bills do they
same old reed the hopeless optimist
still reaching for the stars with the world on your back
you remember in school we talked about working together
that 's what i was about to explain
this is n't going to be a problem is it
not at all
you back this mission and i 'll sign over a fair percentage of any applications or --
the number 's seventy five
and it 's applications and patents
we 've got minutes until it hits not hours
victor that storm 's deadly -- the radiation 's lethal
we need to abort
get a grip
reed
we did n't come all this way to lose our nerve at the first little glitch
just close the shields
ben 's still out there --
so reel him in
but we came here to do a job
so let 's do it
quickly
come on ben come on
reed we 're running out of time
not until ben is back inside
it 's too late for him and soon it 'll be too late for all of us
just a little banged up
a couple scrapes
why
ben did this
ben did this
he 's had some kind of
reaction to exposure from the cloud
and he 's not the only one
i 'm starting to wonder the same thing
how much do you know about what happened to you
not much
we need to run tests to see the extent of the damage
did n't go as planned
it was a catastrophe
you ruined the lives of four people --
i ruined
with all due respect i told you to abort --
abort
reed i put my company my name billions of dollars on the line and i will not let you make me look like a fool --
victor if we could understand what happened to us --
i do n't want to understand it
this is n't one of your science projects
i just want to fix it
fast
what are you doing here
what i should have done a long time ago
applications and patents reed
this all belongs to me
but i 'm not done with the machine --
which is precisely the point
analysis is over
it 's time for action
my men could have mass produced this by now
it 's been a good two years victor
the company 's accomplished so much
right of course the company
but you see i 've come to realize all the accomplishments in the world mean nothing without someone to share them with --
uh victor i hope i have n't done something to make you think
sue i 've lived my life unafraid of taking big steps
and this is the biggest step yet
if it helps think of this as a promotion
a merger of sorts
four little words that can change our lives
what are you doing
raising the shields
you ca n't leave them out there
what 's going on
victor are you feeling alright
victor i 'm sorry i --
just find him
victor your scar --
i told you i 'm fine
it 's you i 'm worried about
i 'm sorry i did n't get a chance to --
please no apologies
i 've arranged for your things to be moved to one of my condos
you 'll have round the clock care
you said it was urgent
it is
there 's something we need to talk about
something i need to ask you
victor wait slow down a second
i want you to know i appreciate everything you 've done for me but i just do n't --
susan
what are you doing
he 's working round the clock
but the data needs to be tested analyzed before --
same old reed
all analysis no action
was n't that the problem with you two
scuse me
i know it ca n't be easy
life has n't changed that much for reed sue and johnny
at least they can go out in public
but for you
people staring
whispering behind your back
if you 're trying to cheer me up you 're doing a helluva job --
i 'm just saying i know what it 's like to lose something you love
to see it slip away and know it 's never coming back
reed 's gon na fix me up --
for your sake i hope you 're right
i 'm sorry if that sounds a little skeptical
skeptical
brad can i talk to you a minute
arnold
what 's happening
brad i really fuckin hate mcdonald 's man
ever since they started in with the chicken everything went downhill
you want to work at carl 's
oh man if you could swing something there i 'd do anything for you
i want to work with you guys
i can probably get you in there
just let me talk to dennis taylor
all right
were those flowers really for me brad
of course
how much did they cost
do n't worry about it
what 's there to do at the point
god lisa we 've been going together almost two years and
brad
i do n't want to have to use sex as a tool
tool
tool for what
we 've been going together almost two years
i do n't want to talk about it here brad
man i do n't even want to see those guys from carl 's again
if you 'd apologize i think dennis would take you back
apologize to that wimp
no way
fuck dennis taylor
i 'm just glad we 're still together lisa because i need you this year
look brad i 've been trying to think of a way to tell you this
we 're almost out of high school this is our last year
i think we owe it to ourselves to be free and meet some new people
then if we get back together we 'll know it 's the right thing
i ca n't find it mon
it 's the first door on your left
on the ledge
first door on your left
there it is
easy mon
later
hamilton come over here
what is that you 've got on
this is how i dress all the time
but you took off your captain kidd uniform
i thought i 'd take it off for the drive over to ibm
it 's kind of uncomfortable
come on hamilton
you 're going over there to represent captain kidd fish and chips
we have stores all over southern california
part of our image part of our appeal is in our uniforms
you know that
you really want me to put all this stuff back on
yes
i think so
show some pride hamilton
well i believe you have to fill out a form
there 's a pad right around here
no
i want my money back right now
well that 's not the way it works really
and you ate most of your food already too
see that sign
it says 100 money back guarantee
do you know the meaning of the word guarantee
do they teach you that here
give me my money back
i ca n't do that
but if you wait a minute
look
just put your little hand back in the cash register and give me my 2.75 back
okay
please brad
i 'm sorry sir
just let me find the forms here
i am so tired
i am so tired of dealing with morons
how hard is it to
mister if you do n't shut up i 'm gon na kick 100 of your ass
manager
hi brad
sis
brad
have mom or dad seen this
they 're not home yet
brad what would you say if i asked you to just put these flowers in the trunk of the cruising vessel and get rid of them at work
i 'd say
who the hell is ron johnson
i 'll explain everything later
thanks for getting rid of those flowers
do n't worry about it
who sent the flowers
it 's just some guy i met at swenson 's
you do n't know him
i do n't care it you tell me or not
i got problems of my own
is everything okay at work
are you kidding
work is great
i kill at work
i do n't even mind mom and dad making me pay rent
you 're going to break up with lisa are n't you
i 've been doing some thinking
it 's my last school year
i 'm a single successful guy
i think i want my freedom
why
because she wo n't sleep with you
where did you hear that
i 'm just guessing
well
it 's true
maybe you just need to give her some time
she 's so nice brad
everybody loves lisa
everybody loves lisa
everybody loves lisa
but everybody does n't have to be her boyfriend
hey brad
are you still a virgin
why
i do n't know
i was just curious
maybe yes
maybe no
you are a virgin
i did n't say that
but your face did
are you still a virgin
maybe yes
maybe no
do n't give me that shit
i know you 're still a virgin
does mom know you have company
it 's just linda
and mark from school
yeah
this is it
i have some shopping to do
see you later
thanks a lot brad
i really appreciate it
since when do you shop at the flea market anyway
brad
please do n't tell mom and dad
did you throw away those fries hamilton
they were left over from the last shift
those were perfectly good fries hamilton
perfectly good
but they were n't mine
come on
clean that counter off brad
let 's go
play ball
okay dennis
did you threaten this man or use profanity in any way
he insulted me first
he called me a moron
did you threaten this customer or use profanity in any way
yes sir
you 're fired
dad says you have to get up
ugh
leave me alone
dad says you 're late again you butthole
leave me alone
dad says
jeff you have company
go away curtis
if you ca n't knock i ca n't hear you
nice to meet you stacy
nice to meet you
hey
we came over to help you with math homework
oh really
you know mark ratner really likes you
you like him
mark is a really nice boy
do you have any ice tea
sure
come on in
i guess the annuals are coming in pretty soon
are you going to get one
i do n't know
are n't you curious to see how your class picture turned out
i know what i look like
do you want to take a quick swim
well
brad probably has some trunks you can borrow
i 'm going to my room to change
pick a suit
i do n't know
it 's getting pretty late
are you really a virgin
come on
listen
i feel pretty strange here
because mark really likes you and he 's my friend
he 's my friend too
you 're a really good kisser
so are you
are you shaking
no
are you crazy
hey mike
what
are you all right
i think we 're making a lot of noise
i 'm sorry
i 'm really sorry
what 's wrong
i think i came
did n't you feel it
i guess i did
oh
hi
i did n't see you this morning
look i 'm kind of in a hurry
i 'm in a hurry too
i just thought i could say hi to you
hello
what 's going on
mike there 's something that 's been on my mind and i have to tell you about it
what
now
why do n't you call me up tonight
mike
i want you to know that i 'm pregnant
how do you know it 's mine
we only did it once
i know it 's yours
take that back
all right i take it back
there 's only one thing we can do
we 've got to get rid of it
we 've got to get an abortion
we 've got to get an abortion
yeah
my brother art got his girlfriend one once
it 's already planned mike
it 's going to cost 150 at the free clinic
does n't sound free to me
so you want me to pay for it
half
okay
seventy five dollars
and a ride to the clinic
seventy five dollars and a ride
okay
you
are a wuss
part wimp
part pussy
what do you mean -- wuss
this girl is my exact type
it 's her
definitely her
it 's definitely your mama
damone you got ta listen to me
all right
where did you see her
she 's in my biology class
did you get her number
no
did you get her name
no
it 's too soon
it 's never too soon
girls decide how far to let you go in the first five minutes
well what do you want me to do
go up to this strange girl in my biology class and say hello
i 'd like you to take your clothes off and jump on me
i would
yeah
really
i can see it all now
this is going to be just like the girl you fell in love with at fotomat this summer
you bought forty bucks of fuckin film and you never even talked to her
you tell me mike
what do i do
okay
okay
here 's what you do
do n't talk to her
let her know
use your face
use your body
use everything
this is what i do
i just sent out the vibe and i have personally found that
girls do respond
something happens
of course something happens
you put the vibe out to thirty million chicks you know something 's gon na happen
that 's the idea rat
that 's the attitude
the attitude
the attitude dictates that you do n't care if she comes stays lays or prays
whatever happens your toes are still tappin
when you are the cruelest and the coolest
then you have the attitude
the business is changing rat
i 'll tell you these kids today
they do n't even listen to aerosmith
i hear they all dress like that at lincoln now
there used to be three or four of those guys
now we see 'em every time we come to the mall
hey rat
yeah
ace the jacket
knock it off damone
i need real help
what do you mean
men have died trying to obtain this information
i will give it to you for free
okay
tell me
what 's the five point plan
all right
pay attention
and that is how you talk to a girl rat
voila
you ca n't miss
i think i 've got it
once i get going i 'll be okay
but
how do i get started
i mean i hardly know her
you wuss
it 's no problem
one person says something to the other and that 's how it starts
hey mark
is that you
damone
you come here
i come for the seafood
it 's great
hey
you know what mark
i found your wallet the other day
you want it back
wow
i 've been looking for that thing
hey damone have you met stacy hamilton
stacy this is mike damone
well i 've got ta be running
okay
see ya
poor guy
really
no
i do n't think so
not right now
chicken
if you ask me she 's pretty aggressive
you understand what i 'm saying
no damone
i do n't understand
she was n't really your girlfriend anyway
hey fuck you damone
there 's a lot of girls out there and you mess around with stacy
what have you got to prove
jesus
i 'm sorry
i always stick up for you
whenever people say aw that damone is a loudmouth -- and they say that a lot -- i say you just do n't know damone
when someone says you 're an idiot i tell them damone 's not an idiot
you just do n't know him
well you know damone maybe they do know you pretty good
and i 'm just finding out
fine
get lost
you 're losing it damone
you 're crazy
those girls love me
the attitude damone is only good until you meet the right girl
whatever you say rat
and
you can only tell it 's the right girl if you 're sensitive
sensitive -- what is that
sensitive is when you can tell how people feel without asking
so what makes you so sensitive
well for one i read
i do n't watch as much television as you
i 'm trying to feel things more
i 'm learning a lot about people
what do you read
what 's the last book you read
lust for life
it 's the story of vincent van gough
yeah well i saw the movie
that must mean i 'm sensitive too
it 's a way damone
it 's a vibe
i put it out and i have personally found that girls do respond
how 've you been
outrageous merv
nice to be here
i feel great
i was going to say
your eyes look a little red
i 've been swimming merv
seriously merv everything is great
i was thinking about picking up some hash this weekend maybe going up to the mountains
i wanted to talk a little bit about school if i could
school
school is no problem
all you have to do is go to get the grades
and if you know something all you have to do is go about half the time
how often do you go
i do n't go at all
i hear you brought a film clip with you
do you want to set it up for us
well it pretty much speaks for itself
peter you want to run with it
merv this is the action down at sunset cliffs at about six in the morning
fascinating
who 's that
that 's me merv
are you going to ride that wave
totally
what 's going through your mind right here jeff
the danger of it all
merv i 'm thinking
i 've only got about four good hours of surfing left before these little clowns from junior high start showing up with their boogie boards
hey slow down
this is my brother 's car
i thought he was out of town
he is
then do n't hassle it
it 's a bunch of jocks in a granada
they 're fuckin with us
my brother 's car
all right
die granada jocks
we just missed the turnoff to the party
you know the thing i love about mustangs
the steering wheel
my brother is going to kill us
he 's gon na kill you and then he 's gon na kill me
he 's gon na kill us
just be glad you 're all right
my brother is gon na shit
make up your mind
is he gon na shit or is he gon na kill us
first he 's gon na shit
and then he 's gon na kill us
will you just relax mon
he 's not gon na kill us
my father is a television repairman
he 's got all kinds of tools
i can fix this car
you ca n't fix this car spicoli
that 's him
he did it
hey mon i do n't know what your trip is but
how 's it going
do you think that guy 's cute
do n't you like him
yeah but i fucked up
you can take it
really
come on stacy it 's your section and your man
what should i do
just take his order look him in the eye and if he says anything remotely funny laugh a lot
he gave me his card
ron johnson audio consultant
should we buy a frame for that
come on linda i have n't had a boyfriend all summer
you promised when i started working at the mall that my life would change
do you think he 'll call this week
listen stace you want to know about guys
i 'll tell you
they 're mostly chicken
before i met doug i chased after every guy i thought was cute
i thought if i gave out a vibe they 'd get the message and call me up
well guess what
they do n't call
so what did you do
i called them
if i was sitting next to a guy and i wanted to sit closer i 'd sit closer
if i wanted to kiss him i 'd just do it
you want ron johnson
grab him
i ca n't do that
i hear some surfer pulled a knife on mr. hand this morning
no way
he just called him a dick
god
people exaggerate so much at this school
linda
that girl looks just like pat benatar
i know
do you think guys find that attractive
oh give me a break stacy
you 're much prettier than them
yeah but they look more sophisticated
you 'd probably think they 'd be better in bed
what do you mean better in bed
you either do it or you do n't
no there are variables that like i might not be good at
what variables
like you know giving blow jobs
what 's the big deal
well i never did it
there 's nothing to it
just kidding
about 10cc
oh
that 's where that group got its name from
was it great
it was okay
you 'll always remember your first time
it was nice
so tell me do you like ron
is it serious
come on linda
it 's just sex
hey
that 's my line
there
there 's his car
i know he 's at work tonight
he has n't come into swenson 's since he called my house
my mother told him i was still at high school after i told him i was nineteen
i guess i should tell him i 'm fifteen
do n't you dare you 'll never hear from him again
does doug care that you 're seventeen
doug sees beyond that stuff to what the person inside is like
that 's why i 'm marrying him
if he ever calls again i 'll say i 'm eighteen
boy i am so glad to be through with all these games
you 've got to get used to working christmas
people are always screaming and yelling
then they get home and they 're all christmasy
i think christmas brings out the worst in people
i guess ron has n't called yet
not since november
what do you think of that guy who works at the theatre
you know mark ratner
oh come on
what is he
fifteen
sixteen
i sent a letter to doug today
i 'll be so glad when he gets out here
you really ought to look at this linda
there 's a drawing on every page
and all these quizzes
it 's like school
why do n't you put your mother 's secret book back
listen to this
what are your mate 's three most erogenous zones
okay penis that 's one balls
would n't penis and balls be the same category
you 're right
probably penis mouth and neck
all right
here 's another one
the most satisfactory lovemaking occurs when your mate climaxes first you climax first you and your mate climax together
climax together
does that ever happen
no
but it 's a nice idea
listen to this
it says most women derive pleasure from sex but they do n't have real orgasms
how long does doug take
i do n't know
thirty to forty minutes
what 's doug do in chicago
he works for the airline
he 'll be out here
you 'll meet him
what do you think
i think they 're both virgins
i did n't ask for any help
did you linda
no
god he hardly even talks anymore
i know
he hates to have to wear uniforms
stacy
i 've got water in my ears
do you have any q tips
god i do n't think so
better look in the house
what do you think it is
what do you think it is
it could n't be
it could be
i had a pregnancy test at the clinic
i 'll find out monday
i guess it was damone
of course it was damone
if it was ron johnson you 'd be out to here
i 'm not going to tell him
he 's an asshole
i hate him
but it costs money to have an abortion
even at the free clinic
you tell damone to pay for it
it 's the least he can do
it 's the guy 's responsibility too
you know there 's one thing you did n't tell me about guys
what
you did n't tell me that they can be so nice so great
but then you sleep with them and they start acting like they 're five years old
you 're right
i did n't tell you that
i really thought he would show up
i waited
and waited
and waited
that little prick
then i called his house and his mother told me he was in the garage helping his father
that little prick
i paid for it and everything
there goes your stereo for another year
mike damone is a no brain little prick
i 'm not letting him get away with this
do n't do anything linda
i 'd rather just forget about it
i do n't even like the guy
stacy he 's not a guy
he 's a little prick
another summer of working at swenson 's
come on
there 's lots of men around here
keep your eyes open
you know linda
i 've finally figured it out
it 's not sex i want
anyone can have sex
what do you want
i want romance
romance in ridgemont
we do n't even get cable tv
where 's doug
he 's not coming
not coming
what happened
he says he 's got to stay in chicago
he says i should visit him sometimes
sometime
yeah like maybe never
but what are you going to do
well i might go to dartmouth
dartmouth
i did n't tell anyone i applied cause i never thought i 'd make it
i ca n't believe it
but what about doug
there 's a world of guys out there
i just wish i did n't have to date any of them
hey -- doug stallworth
it 's his loss
yeah
i 'm registered for this class
what class
this is u.s. history right
i saw the globe in the window
really
can i come in
oh please
i get so lonely when that third attendance bell rings and i do n't see all my kids here
mr. spicoli
that 's the name they gave me
am i hallucinating here
just what in the hell do you think you 're doing
learning about cuba
having some food
mr. spicoli you 're on dangerous ground here
you 're causing a major disturbance in my class and on my time
i 've been thinking about this mr. hand
if i 'm here
and you 're here
does n't that make it our time
you better save some for me you swine
and you my friend
i 'll see you for a two hour detention every afternoon this week
mr
mr. hand
that 's right jeff
mind if i come in
were you going somewhere tonight jeff
yeah
the graduation dance mr. hand
it 's the last school event of the year
i 'm afraid we 've got some things to discuss here jeff
did i do something wrong mr. hand
do you want to sit there jeff
i do n't know
i guess so
fine
you sit right here on your bed
i 'll use the chair here
as i explained to your parents just a moment ago and to you many times since the very beginning of the school year -- i do n't like to spend my time waiting for late students or detention cases
i 'd rather be preparing the lesson
now mr. spicoli comes a rare moment for me
now i have the unique pleasure of squaring our account
tonight you and i are going to talk in great detail about the davis agreement all the associated treaties and the american revolution in particular
now if you can just turn to chapter 47 of lord of truth and liberty
hey it 's in my locker mr. hand
well then i 'm glad i remembered to bring an extra copy just for you
i think i 've made my point with you tonight
hey mr. hand can i ask you a question
what 's that
do you have a guy like me every year
a guy to
i do n't know make a show of
teach other kids lessons and stuff
well you 'll find out next year
no way mon
when i graduate u.s. history i ai n't even coming over to your side of the building
if you graduate
you 're gon na flunk me
do n't worry spicoli
you 'll probably squeak by
all right
oh yeah
what can i get for you tonight
how about your phone number
thanks for picking me up
no problem
the cuer vo gold the fi ine columbian
you look nice tonight
thanks
so do you
where do you feel like going
i do n't know
wherever you want
how about the point
the point sounds fine
all right the point it is
that 's a nice shirt
thanks
thanks a lot
it 's very warm out tonight
it is
it 's very warm
i wonder how long it will last
are you really nineteen
yes
i am really nineteen
i think i better take you home
what about those other guys you live with
no
i mean back to your home
is this your first time
yes
do you have a pen
this one 's out of ink
oh
yes
thanks for coming to get me
sure thing
this is a nice car
yeah
it 's my sister 's
do you have mrs. george for english
yeah
she is pretty good
yeah
she is pretty good
joey at cinema four said this is a pretty good restaurant
i 've heard that too
do you know what you want
i think i 'll have the seafood salad special
excellent
are you all right
oh yeah
do you mind if i excuse myself for a moment
not at all
i never thought it would happen at the atlantis
jeez
do you want to come inside
are n't your parents asleep
no they 're away for the weekend
brad and i are watching the house
okay
sure
i 'll come in
where 's your brother
i do n't know
probably out
want something to drink
no
that 's okay
well i 'm going to change real quick
i hope you do n't mind
naw
i do n't mind
so
pretty nice house you 've got here
thanks
so
what do you want to do
i do n't know
do you want to see some pictures
i kept a lot of scrapbooks and pictures and stuff from junior high
how stupid right
sure
this is me in the eighth grade
did you have mr. deegan
oh yeah
i had mr. deegan
... i 've got to go home
do you really have to go
well
it 's getting kind of late
where 's mike today
today 's april 16th
damone never comes to school on april 16th
what 's april 16th
it 's john bonham 's birthday
john bonham
john bonham
the drummer for led zeppelin
he died a couple years ago
every birthday he stays home and plays everything john bonham ever recorded
it 's like his own holiday
oh
i see
i made a fool of myself
nobody noticed
do n't worry about it
we 'll just stay out here until everyone comes out we 'll blend back in
what about the notes
i 'll get you the notes
really
yeah
i want you to have this picture so you wo n't forget what i look like
and so you 'll remember to call me over the summer
well i do n't know i may be doing some traveling this summer
i do n't know how much i 'll be around
but i 'll give you a call sometime
i 'd like that
are you ready to order here
well
sure
she will have the seafood salad special
and i will have
the same
anything to drink
two cokes
okay
thanks
are you sure there 's nothing else i can bring you
i 'll have one more coke
do you want another coke stacy
sir
this telegram came for you
actually it is n't for you
it 's for somebody named thompson but it says care of raoul duke
does that make sense
yes
it makes sense
i checked the register for this man thompson
we do n't show him but i figured he might be part of your team
he is
do n't worry i 'll get it to him
what confused us was dr. gonzo 's signature on the telegram from los angeles
when we knew he was right here in the hotel
you did the right thing
never try to understand a press message
about half the time we use codes -- especially with dr. gonzo
tell me
when will the doctor be awake
awake
what do you mean
well
the manager mr. heem would like to meet him
nothing unusual
mr. heem likes to meet all our large accounts
put them on a personal basis
just a chat and a handshake you understand
of course
but if i were you i 'd leave the doctor alone until after he 's eaten breakfast
he 's a very crude man
of course i could hear what the clerk was really saying
listen you fuzzy little shithead -- i 've been fucked around in my time by a fairly good cross section of mean tempered rule crazy cops and now it 's my turn
fuck you officer i 'm in charge here and i 'm telling you we do n't have room for you
certainly mr. duke
my bags are out there in that white cadillac convertible
can you have someone drive it around to the room
oh and could i get a quart of wild turkey two fifths of baccardi and a night 's worth of ice delivered to my room please
do n't worry about a thing sir
just enjoy your stay
well thank you
what 's the message
my light is blinking
ah yes
mr. duke
you have one message call lucy at the americana hotel room 1600
holy shit
mr. duke
hello mr. duke i 'm sorry we were cut off a moment ago
i thought i should call again because i was wondering
what
what was that crazy bitch said to him
there 's a war on man
people are being killed
killed
in vietnam
on the goddamn television
oh
yes
yes
this terrible war
when will it end
tell me
what do you want
the woman who left that message for you sounded very disturbed
i think she was crying
crying
why was she crying
well uh
she did n't say mr. duke
but since i know you 're here with the police convention
look you want to be gentle with that woman if she ever calls again
we 're watching her very carefully
this woman has been into laudanum
it 's a controlled experiment but i suspect we 'll need your cooperation before this thing is over
well certainly
we 're always happy to cooperate with the police
do n't worry
you 're protected
just treat this poor woman like you 'd treat any other human being in trouble
what
ah
yes yes i see what you mean
yes
so you 'll be responsible then
of course
and now i have to get back to the news
send up some ice
rum and ice please
you 're another one of these california boys
your friend here 's been tellin us about dope fiends
they 're everywhere
nobody 's safe
and sure as hell not in the south
they like warm weather
you 'd never believe it
in l.a. it 's out of control
first it was drugs now it 's witchcraft
witchcraft
shit you ca n't mean it
naw
that 's science fiction stuff
not where we operate
hell no
we 'd never hear the goddamn end of it
dobermans do n't talk
what
i 'm a whiskey man myself
we do n't have much trouble from drugs where i come from
you will
one of these nights you 'll wake up and find a junkie tearing your bedroom apart
naw
they 'll climb right into your bedroom and sit on your chest with big bowie knives
they might even sit on your wife 's chest
put the blade right down on her throat
not down in my parts
what happened
what did they do to her
do
jesus christ man
they chopped her goddamn head off right there in the parking lot
then they cut all kinds of holes in her head and sucked out the blood
and nobody did anything
yeh
the big guy used to be a major in the marines
a major
we know where he lives but we ca n't get near the house
naw
not a major
he wanted the pineal gland
really
that 's how he got so big
when he quit the marines he was just a little guy
hell i really hate to hear this
because everything that happens in california seems to get down our way sooner or later
mostly atlanta
but that was back when the goddamn bastards were peaceful
all we had to do was to keep 'em under surveillance
they did n't roam around much
but now jesus it seems nobody 's safe
you 're going to need to take the bull by the horns -- go to the mat with this scum
what do you mean by that
you know what i mean
we 've done it before and we can damn well do it again
where ya comin from young man
las vegas
a great town that vegas
i bet you had good luck there
you 're the type
i know
i 'm a triple scorpio
that 's a fine combination
you ca n't lose
oh my god
this is my granddaughter
do n't worry
and i 'm actually the district attorney from ignoto county
just another good american like yourself
i want you to understand that this man at the wheel is my attorney
he 's not just some dingbat i found on the strip
he 's a foreigner
i think he 's probably samoan
but it does n't matter does it
are you prejudiced
hell no
i did n't think so
because in spite of his race this man is extremely valuable to me
hell i forgot all about this beer
you want one
how about some ether
what
never mind
let 's get right to the heart of this thing
twenty four hours ago we were sitting in the pogo lounge of the beverly wills hotel
we 're your friends
we 're not like the others
no more of that talk or i 'll put the leeches on you
if so -- well we 'll just have to cut his head off and bury him somewhere
because it goes without saying that we ca n't turn him loose
he 'd report us at once to some kind of outback nazi law enforcement agency and they 'll run us down like dogs
jesus
did i say that
or just think it
was i talking
did they hear me
it 's okay
he 's admiring the shape of your skull
god hell
i think i see the pattern
this one sounds like real trouble
you 're going to need plenty of legal advice before this thing is over
as your attorney i must advise you that you 'll need a very fast car with no top and after that the cocaine
and then the tape recorder for special music and some acapulco shirts
this blows my weekend because naturally i 'll have to go with you -- and we 'll have to arm ourselves
why not
if a thing 's worth doing it 's worth doing right
i tell you my man
this is the american dream in action
we 'd be fools not to ride this strange torpedo all the way to the end
indeed
we must do it
what kind of story is this
o.k. o.k. yes
hang onto it
we 'll be there in thirty minutes
i finally located a car with adequate horsepower and the proper coloring
what
of course the gentleman has a major credit card
do you realize who the fuck you 're talking to
do n't take any guff from these swine
now we need a sound store with the finest equipment
nothing dinky
one of those new belgian heliowatts with a voice activated shotgun mike for picking up conversations in oncoming cars
we wo n't make the nut unless we have unlimited credit
we will
you samoans are all the same
you have no faith in the essential decency of the white man 's culture
... and we 're chock full of that
damn right
my attorney understands this concept despite his racial handicap
but do you
he said he understood but i could see in his eyes that he did n't
he was lying to me
my heart
where 's the medicine
the medicine
yes it 's right here
oh jesus
did you see what god just did to us
god did n't do that
you did it
you 're a fucking narcotics agent that was our cocaine you pig
you better be careful
plenty of vultures out here
they 'll pick your bones clean before morning
you whore
how long do i have
maybe thirty more minutes
as your attorney i advise you to drive at top speed
it 'll be a goddamn miracle if we can get there before you turn into a wild animal
are you ready for that
checking into a vegas hotel under a phony name with intent to commit capital fraud and a head full of acid
thirty minutes
it was going to be very close
two cuba libres with beer and mescal on the side
who 's lacerda he 's waiting for us in a room on the twelfth floor
lacerda
i was right in the middle of a fucking reptile zoo
and somebody was giving booze to these goddamn things
it wo n't be long before they tear us to shreds
if you think we 're in trouble now wait until you see what 's happening in the elevators
i just went upstairs to see this man lacerda
i told him i knew what he was up to
he says he 's a photographer
but when i mentioned savage henry he freaked
he knows we 're onto him
but what about our room
and the golf shoes
that 's the press table
where you have to sign in for our credentials
shit let 's get it over with
you handle that and i 'll check on the room
no no
do n't leave me
shoot it
not yet
i want to study its habits
what are you talking about
you bastard
they 'll never let us back in that place
i leave you alone for three minutes and you start waving that goddamn marlin spike around -- yelling about reptiles
you scared the shit out of those people
they were ready to call the cops
hell the only reason they gave us press passes was to get you out of there
why
why what
holy shit
they almost had us there
that was quick thinking
what do you expect
i 'm your attorney
you owe me five bucks
i want it now
jesus creeping shit
did the mescaline just kick in
or was that debbie reynolds in a silver afro wig
we wandered into a fucking time capsule
this is the place
they 'll never fuck with us here
where 's the ether
this mescaline is n't working
some angry rotarian shoves you and you think what 's happening here
what 's going on
then you hear yourself mumbling
dogs fucked the pope no fault of mine
watch out
why money
my name is brinks i was born
born
get sheep over side
women and children to armored car
orders from captain zeep
i hate to say this but this place is getting to me
i think i 'm getting the fear
nonsense
we came here to find the american dream and now we 're right in the vortex you want to quit
you must realize that we 've found the main nerve
that 's what gives me the fear
look over there
two women fucking a polar bear
please do n't tell me those things
not now
this is my last drink
how much money can you lend me
not much
why
i have to go
go
yes
leave the country
tonight
calm down
you 'll be straight in a few hours
no
this is serious
one more hour in this town and i 'll kill somebody
ok
i 'll lend you some money
let 's go outside and see how much we have left
can we make it
that depends on how many people we fuck with between here and the door
i want to leave fast
ok
lets pay this bill and get up very slowly
it 's going to be a long walk
do they pay you to screw that bear
when does this thing stop
it wo n't stop
it 's not ever going to stop
did you see that
some sonofabitch kicked me in the back
probably the bartender
he wanted to stomp you for what you said to the waitress
good god
let 's get out of here
where 's the elevator
do n't go near that elevator
that 's just what they want us to do
trap us in a steel box and take us down to the basement
let 's go up there and blast him out of bed with the fire hose
no we should leave the poor bastard alone
i get the feeling that he 's avoiding us for some reason
do n't kid yourself
that portuguese son of a bitch is dangerous
he 's watching us like a hawk
he told me he was turning in early
that dirty bastard
i knew it
he 's got hold of my woman
that little blonde groupie with the film crew
you think he sodomized her
that 's right laugh about it
you goddamn honkies are all the same
where 'd you get that knife
room service sent it up
i wanted something to cut the limes
what limes
they did n't have any
they do n't grow in the desert
have you made a deal with him
did you put him on to her
look you better put that blade away and get your head straight
i have to put the car in the lot
you evil son of a bitch
you better hope there 's some thorazine in that bag because if there 's not you 're in bad trouble
music
turn it up
put that tape on
what tape
jefferson airplane
white rabbit
i want a rising sound
you 're doomed
i 'm leaving here in two hours and then they 're going to come up here and beat the mortal shit out of you with big saps
right there in that tub
i dig my own graves
green water and the white rabbit
put it on
ok
but do me one last favor will you
can you give me two hours
that 's all i ask -- just two hours to sleep before tomorrow
i suspect it 's going to be a very difficult day
of course i 'm your attorney i 'll give you all the time you need at my normal rates 45 an hour -- but you 'll be wanting a cushion so why do n't you just lay one of those 100 bills down there beside the radio and fuck off
how about a check
whatever 's right
i want that fucking radio
do n't touch it
get back in that tub
back the tape up
i need it again
let it roll
just as high as the fucker can go
and when it comes to that fantastic note where the rabbit bites its own head off i want you to throw that fucking radio into the tub with me
not me
it would blast you through the wall -- stone dead in ten seconds and they 'd make me explain it
bullshit
do n't make me use this
jesus
do it
i want to get higher
you bastard
i need a lawyer immediately
what are you doing in baker
did n't you get my telegram
what
fuck telegrams
i 'm in trouble
you worthless bastard
i 'll cripple your ass for this
all that shit in the car is yours
you understand that
when i finish testifying out here you 'll be disbarred
you 're supposed to be in vegas
we have a suite at the flamingo
i was just about to leave for the airport
you degenerate pig
it ca n't be helped
this is lucy
you know -- like lucy in the sky with diamonds
well
what are your plans
plans
lucy
shit
i met her on the plane and i had all that acid
you know those little blue barrels
i gave her a cap before i realized
she 's a religious freak
jesus she 's never even had a drink
well
it 'll probably work out
we can keep her loaded and peddle her ass at the drug convention
listen she 's running away from home for something like the fifth time in six months
it 's terrible
she 's perfect for this gig
these cops will go fifty bucks a head to beat her into submission and then gang fuck her
we can set her up in one of these back street motels hang pictures of jesus all over the room then turn these pigs loose on her
hell she 's strong she 'll hold her own
jesus christ
i knew you were sick but i never expected to hear you actually say that kind of stuff
it 's straight economics
this girl is a god send
shit she can make us a grand a day
no
stop talking like that
i figure she can do about four at a time
christ if we keep her full of acid that 's more like two grand a day
maybe three
you filthy bastard
i should cave your fucking head in
in a few hours she 'll probably be sane enough to work herself into a towering jesus based rage at the hazy recollection of being seduced by some kind of cruel samoan who fed her liquor and lsd dragged her to a vegas hotel room and savagely penetrated every orifice in her body with his throbbing uncircumcised member
no
i felt sorry for the girl i wanted to help her
you 'll go straight to the gas chamber
and even if you manage to beat that they 'll send you back to nevada for rape and consentual sodomy
she 's got to go
the only alternative was to take her out to the desert and feed her remains to the lizards
but it seemed a bit heavy for the thing we were trying to protect my attorney
we have to cut her loose
she 's got two hundred dollars
and we can always call the cops up there in montana where she lives and turn her in
what
what kind of goddamn monster are you
it just occurred to me that she has no witnesses
anything that she says about us is completely worthless
us
okay lucy it 's time to go meet barbra
i felt like a nazi but it had to be done
read the newspapers
man you do n't know trouble until you have to face down a bunch of these addicts gone crazy for human sacrifice
hell in malibu alone these goddamn satan worshippers kill six or eight people every day
all they want is the blood
they 'll take people right off the street if they have to
just the other day we had a case where they grabbed a girl right out of a mcdonald 's hamburger stand
she was a waitress about sixteen years old
with a lot of people watching too
what could they do
the guy that took the head was about six seven and maybe three hundred pounds
he was packing two lugers and the others had m-16s
they just ran back out into death valley -- you know where manson turned up
like big lizards
... and every one of them stacked naked
yeh naked
except for the weapons
they were all veterans
what 's wrong with you
hell somebody has to do it
hurry up with those drinks
we 're thirsty
only two rums
make mine a bloody mary
sure
it 's all on the q.t. but everybody who matters is with us all the way down the line
we keep it quiet
it 's not the kind of thing you 'd want to talk about upstairs
not with the press around
sometimes it 's easier to just rip out the backstraps
they 'll fight like hell if you try to take the head without the dogs
good work
they 'll treat us like goddamn lepers after that
lucy is looking for you
no she 's looking for you
me
she really flipped over you
the only way i could get rid of her was by saying you were taking me out to the desert for a showdown -- that you wanted me out of the way so you could have her all to yourself
i guess she figures you won
that phone message was n't for me was it
adrenochrome
hi lucy
yeah it 's me
i got your message
what
hell no i taught the bastard a lesson he 'll never forget
what
no not dead but he wo n't be bothering anybody for a while
yeah
i left him out there i stomped him then pulled all his teeth out
i remember thinking jesus what a terrible thing to lay on somebody with a head full of acid
i remember slumping on the bed his performance had given me a bad jolt
for a moment i thought his mind had snapped -- that he actually believed he was being attacked by invisible enemies
but the room was quiet again
where 'd you get this
never mind it 's absolutely pure
jesus
what kind of monster client have you picked up this time
there 's only one source for this stuff -- the adrenaline gland from a living human body
i know but the guy did n't have any cash to pay me
he 's one of these satanism freaks
he offered me human blood -- said it would take me higher than i 've ever been in my life
i thought he was kidding so i told him i 'd just as soon have an ounce or so of pure adrenochrome -- or maybe just a fresh adrenaline gland to chew on
i could already feel the stuff working on me -- the first wave felt like a combination of mescaline and methedrine -- maybe i should take a swim i thought
why not
we should get some of that
just eat a big handful and see what happens
some of what
extract of pineal
sure
that 's a good idea
one whiff of that shit would turn you into something out of a goddamn medical encyclopedia
man your head would swell up like a watermelon you 'd probably gain about a hundred pounds in two hours
right
... grow claws
bleeding warts
yes
... then you 'd notice about six huge hairy tits swelling up on your back
man i 'll try about anything but i 'd never touch a pineal gland
finish the fucking story
what happened
what about the glands
so do we lady
i think we should put her on the payroll
see what she comes up with
do you think you can handle it
alright alice
you 'll be contacted by inspector rock
arthur rock
he 'll be posing as a politician
inspector rock will pay you
in cash
a thousand dollars on the ninth of every month
fuck the car
they should make these things with a goddamn fm radio
yeh
this foreign made crap -- is sucking our dollar balance dry
what are you doing
you were supposed to turn back there
we had abused every rule that vegas lived by -- burning the locals abusing the tourists terrifying the help
the only chance now i felt was the possibility that we 'd gone to such excess that nobody in the position to bring the hammer down on us could possibility believe it
the airport is over there
never missed a plane yet
no
i ca n't get out
they 'll crucify me
i 'll have to take the blame
ridiculous
just say you were hitchhiking to the airport and i picked you up
you never saw me before
shit this town is full of white cadillac convertibles
i plan to go through there so fast that nobody will even glimpse the goddamn license plate
you ready
why not
but for christ 's sake just do it fast
do n't take any guff from those swine
remember if you have any trouble you can always send a telegram to the right people
yeah
explaining my position
some asshole wrote a poem about that once
please
please
i 'm only the maid
i did n't mean nothin
you're under arrest
what made you do it
who paid you off
nobody
i 'm the maid
the dope ring
you must know what 's going on in this hotel
why do you think we 're here
i know you 're cops but i thought you were just here for that convention
i swear
all i wanted to do was clean up the room
i do n't know anything about dope
maybe she 's telling the truth
maybe she 's not part of it
no
i swear i 'm not
may i see your license
of course officer
could i have that please
why not
it was getting warm anyway
you realize
yeah
i know
i 'm guilty
i understand that
i knew it was a crime but i did it anyway
shit why argue
i 'm a fucking criminal
that 's a strange attitude
you know -- i get the feeling you could use a nap
there 's a rest area up ahead
why do n't you pull over and sleep a few hours
a nap wo n't help
i 've been awake for too long -- three or four nights
i ca n't even remember
if i go to sleep now i 'm dead for twenty hours
okay
here 's how it is
what goes into my book as of noon is that i apprehended you
for driving too fast and advised you to proceed no further than the next rest area
your stated destination right
where you plan to take a long nap
do i make myself clear
how far is baker
i was hoping to stop there for lunch
not my jurisdiction
the city limits are two point two miles beyond the rest area
can you make it that far
i 'll try
i 've been wanting to go to baker for a long time
i 've heard a lot about it
you 're lying
you were after the evidence
who put you up to this -- the manager
i do n't know what you 're talking about
bullshit
you 're just as much a part of it as they are
part of what
come on baby do n't try to tell us you never heard of the grange gorman
no
no
i swear to jesus i never heard of that stuff
in that case maybe she can help
yes
i 'll help you all you need
i hate dope
oh and do n't bother to make up the room
that way we wo n't have to risk another of these little incidents will we
whatever you say gentlemen
i ca n't tell you how sorry i am about what happened
do n't worry it 's all over now
thank god for the decent people
it serves you right
you cheatin jerk
spare me
i figure it 's karma
you wronged me and you wronged your wife and you wronged your children so this is karma biting you on the ass or in your case
on the eye
stop
what the fuck are you doing he 's in there
they ca n't get in here
you said it yourself they 'll get in
you're killing him
they 'll get in
we 'll all die
you ca n't keep me here
this is bullshit
fuckin bullshit
this is fucking bullshit
we ca n't risk letting them in
right
careful
i 'm telling you i do n't see a thing --
i will not die because of him
do n't be stupid drop the gun
we should go
we should go right now
he 's right let 's move
be quiet and get to the exit
pair up grab the weapons
we 'll meet in three hours
i do n't wanna go home alone
i do n't wanna see what might have
where are you two going
we 're going to get my little girl
sorry did n't mean to scare you
where is everyone
i do n't know i just got here
did you find your girl
is it clear
yeah
is there a gun pointing at you
nah i got the gun
my god damn foot is gone
who fuckin shot me
who fuckin shot me
her fella
well it do n't look pretty
but it 's got teeth
i got my
38 here
that 's six shots and two refills
downstairs i think we got another rifle maybe a scatterer and some gardening tools
maybe a couple boxes of shells for the judge
i got shells too box and a half tops
i do n't think you should
with what just happened upstairs --
stop it
hey
you noticed that no one 's been killed or maimed for awhile
we shot a skunk
we 're lucky to be alive
hey
get quiet or get out
c'mon guys--
i think i know where a cb is
where 's that
upstairs
okay now
easy steps
easy breaths
easy steps
come on come on
oh
oh
what is oh
what does oh mean
wha
open the door
you got something better
if we move in a group we are one target
if we scatter they can't get us all
and that 's how i ended up here
and the head
so your husband ditched you
no no no it was
it was wild out there no time to think we just moved
he did n't leave me
he just ran
he just ran
well justice is funny
they 're right here
hey
jesus christ i 'm gon na have a stroke
easy
do n't bullshit me
if you know a way out of this place and you 're holding out --
there 's a tunnel
what tunnel
where
it 's in the basement about a hundred yards long
it spits out on the backside of that hill down the way
there 's a truck there
what 's it for
hey
no i 'm not trusting him either that 's why you and i will both be going with him
what
i 'm not going down there again
this is it
this is our only way out
they have this place surrounded
we go out the front we 're dead
we go out the back we 're dead but if we go under them
we might just make it
now who else is in
seven can go
this is a bottleneck waiting to happen
you all sure about this
follow me
i 'm gon na shoot him if they do n't get him first
just move
you seem mighty collected about this
buddy i 'm a full blooded chucktow
i ca n't think of a time my people have n't been takin it dry
the fact that we are being eaten now does n't even faze me
this is just another tuesday
you 're trusting that guy
he 'll ditch us and never look back
fuck you too
get in line
scared
no
you
of course not
i fight monsters all the time
i 'd love to be macho but this is a pants wetter from all angles
the door
on three
ohhh
what
look
that 's an unwise thing to say you know that
just an observation
well why do n't you keep your observations to yourself
so what now
did those things leave
why do n't you go check it out
fuck no
do you drive a short beer bus or something
you go out there you get eaten you stay in here you get eaten anyone comes to help they get eaten
do n't you see a pattern here spuds makenzie
well then i guess we should just give up
believe me i 'd love to save the day and get some heroic snatch
but it 's not in the cards partner
we 're better off
who 's with me
come on
he 's dead
what now geronimo
my truck
why do you take shit from him
look yeah he 's an ass but he 's my brother
que sera sera
your brother huh
yep
your parents of relation
we lived near power lines
i 'm in
anyone else
we 're going to get help
we got ta try
anybody else
we got ta be close
what
yeah the lot 's right there
my truck is right out back
but not flush against the tunnel
it 's imperative that you get that truck moving
just cover me
it was built to move
how are you holding up
well
push and twist it 's child proof
oh
gimme a couple dabs on the tongue
what is this
magic potion
you should try a little
oh no
it 'll calm your nerves
works like a charm
really
uh huh
just put a dab on your tongue
will i go crazy or something
no no it calms you makes everything nice and smooth
just takes the edge off like a beer but in a fraction of the time
why not then
wait before you do that help me to the kitchen i need to lay down
there 's a cot back there
but --
it 's much safer in there sweety
okay then
does n't your foot hurt
i ca n't feel a thing hon
um hmmm
the girl 's got rhythm
what
really
uh huh now wiggle that sweet little ass over here and sit on daddy 's face i wanna do some appraising
my husband
well where 's the sonuvabitch
he 's dead
what
jesus christ on the cross
someone make sense
easy
we 're surrounded by something the likes none of you have ever seen before
some kind of animals
real fast volatile predators
one went through three of your patrons like they were kleenex
so your dead hubby shot me twice three of my customers have been eaten and there are angry creatures outside
he only shot you once
huh
he shot you the other time
will these boards hold
the boards are solid oak planks and the floor is reinforced by a steel grid beneath
nothing real or supernatural is busting through this least nothing the size of the beasts
good
in the kitchen under the sink
no one goes anywhere alone
least of all unarmed
go for it
it 's by the far wall
a small wave band
channel 9 is the emergency frequency
but i do n't see the point
you 're wasting your time there 's no one out there
what
what
what do you mean what
huh
what 's going on between you two
nothing
what 's it for
grass
i grow some pot down there
it 's no big deal just something i dabble in
the truck 's for a quick get away deliveries whatever
is it gassed up
fully
four door
two
open
covered
how many
holds four
max
seven
nine
seven
keys
what
so you can just get the hell outta here and forget about all of us
no way
that 's my god damn truck
let me make this clear if we stay we die
i do n't trust you
no way
i pick who goes
and i 'm holding you responsible
you young'uns worry about weapons i 'm thinkin bout strategy
oh
and what 's that
sit still look less like a meal
i think that 's for bears and sharks chunky chew
i would n't do that son
they 're probably on to the next buffet by now
there 's a retirement home up the road
they 'd be easy
i 'll go with ya
what are you gon na do
throw your teeth at 'em
sit down cocoon
welcome back
f f fuck you
they were all over the place
you smell like ass
look the armed surround the unarmed in a circle and we move as a tight group
those that can shoot protect the rest to his ride
hey when this plan completely goes to shit what are ya gon na do
bullshit
no bullshit
clever fuckers
what the hell 's going on here
eh chief
duh hickey
fine chief
gimme the keys
no but i will lock you in
what
we 'll be on the other side waiting for you
if you become food i do n't want the only set of keys in the belly of one of those things
it 's your funeral
you are taking a chance that is not worth the risk
well we are one miracle short tonight
so just guard the stairs
done
but you 're locked in
will you hold the keys
what
move slow and move quiet
no shit
move it
you keep that key handy
shit
i 'm fine
i 'm fine
just a bat
i'm fine
just a bat
sorry
if he does n't shut up
hurry
repeat
we need help
sos
calling all cars
we need help at the united nations tav--
yeah maybe
get something on that
where the hell are we going to go then billy jack
there 's a bomb shelter over in durant by the iga on first
you all know where that is
you do n't want the rag to touch the booze that way you can hold it awhile and ensure it explodes when you throw it
you sure
i thought the rag had to touch
i 'm sure
help meee
bonsai
i 'm in a wheelchair the truck sounds pretty good
amazing you made it this far
nothin' will happen to you
you get on my back hold on tight and we truck out of here together
am i too heavy for you
do n't worry you 'll be like my little papoose
oh jesus
helllppp
well maybe they migrate
as long as it 's dark they 're around
they hide wait for you to drop your guard and then attack
yeah i 'll go
ok
let 's see what happens
let 's move
i 'm done drinking
that 's it
just church and grocery stores
nothin' else
do we have anything else to defend ourselves with
anything
right
were going to need some fire power
do you have any sort of guns or ammunition here
anything at all
what 's wrong
nothing just lookin
let 's go
she 's not very nice is she
don't
you'll hit us
let 's wait it out
they 'll tear this place down within the hour
if you are face to face with her dive left
and the last one is the
father
the biggest the strongest
hold it
whoa
let 's go
wait god dammit
if there is only one way out for us there is only one way in for them
make a distraction out front and go for it out the back
there 's cars back there right
go
go
not without you
go
get to your cars
go go go
oh my god
what is that
that 's one piece of four problems
cody
cody are you all right
mommy 's coming
mommy 's coming baby
do n't move
mommy 's coming
stop her
oh sweetheart
what was i thinking
mommy is never gon na let you go
oh jesus
never ever never let you go
let 's lock off this room
her name is charlie
oh
she 's still alive i hope
i would n't have made it this far if it were n't for the chance of seeing my little girl again
i need to get to her
i 'll do anything to help
i know
thanks
just do n't tell anyone i have a soft side
deal
we should stick together out there
i 'd love to
did we make it
i think --
hey little bear are n't you going to join the others
um my allergist told me not to engage in physically demanding activities where ragweed or spores might be present sir
do you have a note to corroborate these claims
um well
are you lying to me
well
what did we say about lying
i 'm not lying
you know that no one likes a liar right
i said i 'm not lying
what have you done now broke the darn thing
i just hit it like you said
well
come on
this is a mistake
no
this is a disaster
come on it 's just what you need
let everyone see you
talk to them live it up
but we 've been at it since six this morning
at least you could 've let me go home and change
look frances i did n't want this job
think i 'm crazy
but you begged me improve your image
so please
lemme try huh
you 're right
i 'm sorry
okay let 's go get 'em
here take a few of these
studio makes 'em in the basement
they keep the fat off
so not only am i a troublesome bitch but i 'm fat too
come on
they make you feel nice and peppy
frances
oh no
refill my drink will you bob
what 're you doing
putting on my armor
come on frances
louella parsons is here
she wants to talk to you help you out
louella
did n't she call me a spoiled little bitch
come on she 's an important columnist
what 's the matter
i thought you wanted these people to forgive you
forgive
for what
i 'm sorry
that was an unfortunate choice of words
good morning mr. bebe
who 's this
frances farmer contract player six- month option
okay
good tits
ca n't we show them off a little more
i guess so sir
very fine bone structure
that 's frances
i 'm not the cookbook
you see we 've got to change that name
i like your looks
you have the classical bone structure of the very great beauties
garbo dietrich --
thank you --
i intend to make a great deal of money off you
since we have you on a seven year contract i 'm planning long range
i 'm going to loan you out to sam goldwyn to make a picture called come and get it
really
that 's a very good book
it 'd make a terrific --
never mind that
i 'm concerned about you
your attitude
society is falling apart miss farmer and people have to buckle down do their jobs
you see i view myself as the henry ford of motion picture industry and i ca n't have the fellow who puts on the wheels arguing with the man who installs head lights now can i
but i 'm concerned with everything mr. bebe
no i 'm concerned with everything
but i 'm the one up there on the screen
that 's right
you 're an actress miss farmer and your job is to act
look mr. bebe you can hold me to my contract but you ca n't break me
i 'm back and i 'm gon na make the best of it
i 'd like nothing better
hi frances got a minute
sure claire
if you do n't mind walking my way
well i suppose i should just say it
it 's your clothes
my clothes
yeah i mean slacks
and work clothes
and that awful car --
it 's a perfectly good car
it runs
yes but
really i hate to sound
it 's just that the public expects something different from its stars
people wo n't take you seriously
i do n't care if my clothes are taken seriously
or my car
you know what i mean
uh huh
you mean what if the public finds out i perspire
and wear slacks
and drive an old jalopy
what if they find out i 'm a real person
oh no
say it ai n't so
not a real person
good good
give them that
what
madam
thank you
oh my god
frances i 'm such a cad
i ca n't go through with this
my wife is in europe but this is her house
her bedroom
i ca n't ask you to
oh well
i guess i better leave then
okay but come here first
huh
come here
i want to show you something
the group is more than a theatre company
it 's the embodiment of an ideal
our approach allows the actor to be an artist in the fullest sense a creative individual and an instrument of change
you see --
really mr. clurman you do n't have to sell me
forgive my indulgence
seems we always lecture those who are on time for those who are tardy
the point is mr. odets here has written a wonderful play
most of the roles are cast but we have n't found our female lead
who is she
... not only an artist but an instrument of change
we must look to the world around us not content to observe but to take an active hand in redressing its wrongs
we will not stand idly by as fascist bombs obliterate democracy
we contribute our profits for if fascism is not stopped in spain it will spread across europe jeopardizing the struggle of civilized man to survive
the artist to be vital must be a soldier too
i 'm not afraid of struggle clifford
hello harold
frances
where 's clifford
he 's not here
oh
what 's up
i hear you 're meeting with the studio lawyers to get out of your contract
that 's right
i do n't want them breathing down my neck while we 're in london
well
well you see that 's the point
you wo n't be opening in london
get your clothes on
you have no right
you have no fucking right you bastards
get the hell out of here --
get your clothes on lady --
get out
you 're under arrest
you learn your lines
sort of
there 've been some calls
who
well
about half an hour ago that woman from the talent department called what 's her name
claire
yeah claire
she said she was fired
too bad huh
fired
yeah
she said she delivered your message and that you 'd understand
there was another call too
from your agent
he says your summer stock deal is all set
so you 're going back east huh
... yes
without me
showdown
you were n't going to tell me were you
just pack up and leave is that it
dick we need some time apart --
hey i 'm not a complete fool you know
i can see you 're going sour on me and when i try to do something about it you turn your back and say it 's nothing
dick i ca n't even breathe here
dwayne
i 'm dwayne now
and you damn well better get used to it
dick
i do n't suppose it occurred to you that i might want to leave too that i might want to do theatre
no 'cause you do n't want me along do you
and the reason has nothing to do with summer stock
no
no
it 's all about that night is n't it
what night
the premiere
i never pressed you about it but god damn it you 're gon na tell me right here and right now what happened and where the hell you were
you want his name
oh god
let 's get her out of here tonight right now
let 's take her with us
the hearing 's tomorrow
if she gets out legally they ca n't come after her
look at her
she 'll never pass that sanity test tomorrow
i 'm taking care of that harry
just hold her
reserpine
i guarantee you this'll clear her head
she 'll wake up feeling smart and sailright through the hearing
let 's get out of here
i 'll lose my job
frances we got ta do it this way
just remember tomorrow remember what i told you
what 're you gon na tell 'em
harry
i got ta go now
we 're all square now harry
right
all square doc
good
'cause i do n't want to see you again
doctor it may sound odd but i believe i 've profited from my stay here
it 's just what i 've needed to get away like this
but i 'm recuperated now
i 've had lots of time to think and i 've made a few decisions about my life
i 'm ready to get on with it
i know you believe that
... do n't you
i 'm afraid not
you see we observe things that you 're unaware of signs indicators
your problem cuts very deep frances and we have to get at that deeper stuff so that when you do get out you 'll really feel secure
does that make sense
this is the answer a subscription drive to voice of action
first prize is a trip to moscow
you could visit the art theatre maybe even meet stanislavski
but i 'll never win that
yes yes it 's all arranged
everyone 's collecting subscriptions in your name
and the best part is the trip returns you to new york
really
new york frances
broadway
this is your chance
you belong on the stage
thank you
... until finally your mother finds it necessary to commit you to a state mental institution
were you mentally ill frances
... no ralph
i do n't believe i ever was sick
but when you 're treated like a patient long enough you 're apt to act like one
were you an alcoholic
no
were you a drug addict
no
never
thank you ralph
thank you frances
and after the show we 're hosting a reception for you and your friends at hollywood 's own roosevelt hotel
bye baby
see you next weekend dad
i 'm
i 'm really proud of you frances
thanks dad
an essay contest
a national contest
that 's pretty impressive
i did n't have much to do with it
you wrote it did n't you
yeah i suppose
dad who 's harry york
well harry york is a guy who
well he does a lot of things
why do you ask
he talked to me today
told me to keep my mouth shut or i 'd get everybody in trouble
yeah
well
it 's possible
harry york and i both work for mr. kaminski right now and
well
there are lots of folks in this country who never got a square break
that 's the way of things but mr. kaminski wants to change it and when it comes to new ideas the people in power get nervous
is kaminski a communist
no no no
all he wants to do is see the common man get a little representation
he 's a socialist then
it 's already started dad
with me
i know
and i ca n't understand how it can hurt to be honest but the more i tried to explain --
dad please do n't leave early
just because of mama --
francie you 'll learn that sometimes it 's best to stay low and just walk away
... so what do you think
i do n't know honey
your mother has such big plans for you
i know that dad but --
what you have to understand francie is that she
well
she wanted so much for herself too and for me and she never really got to
the only time i ever saw her happy was if her name was in the papers
but she could have been
if times were different she could have been a politician or
i do n't know
but dad i 'm asking about me
what do you think i should do
well francie sometimes after you get your hands on something you want it just does n't look the same
then you have to be real smart to know if you should hold onto it because it 's all you 've got
or just let it go
this is the way of things but i guess you already know that
dad
whatever i decide will it be okay with you
always
always
i 'm sorry i
i do n't have a desk in my room and
i do n't care dad
i love you
i love you too francie
francie you know i ca n't do that
why
it 's such a simple thing
you just let me out and i disappear down a road and you never have to see me again
they 'll just catch you again francie
besides your mother will know
dad here
you do n't have to stop just slow down
you can tell mama i jumped out
she knows that 's the kind of thing i 'd do
she wo n't blame you
but i gave her my word
besides she 's still your legal guardian
my hands are tied
you know where you 're taking me
you know what she 'll do
just give me a minute slow down give me an instant for once in your life please
please francie
daddy
are you
are you hungry
i pity us dad
i pity us both
it always amazes me lil how you can whip up a hot hearty meal out of thin air
i can thank you for that
it was a hard earned talent
bread
thank you
when 's the last time you saw a hundred dollars ernest farmer
lillian
i 'm more than willing to meet you halfway
do n't make me sick
i 'd sooner drown myself in puget sound
that 's a thought lil
that sure is a thought
kurt
oh angela
go with these trappers
they 'll lead you safely down the mountain
but kurt i
no no arguments
be my good girl and go
there 's a forest a burning forest and you know what i have to do
oh kurt
oh angela my own
angela
name
i do n't believe this
you jerks drag me down here in the middle of the night and you do n't even know who the hell i am
age
fifteen
address
just put me down as a avg -- a vagrant vagabond
come on this is a joke
assault and battery
i barely touched that bitch
occupation
i 'm really sad it 's closing
now what am i gon na do on tuesday nights
you can always come see it in london
only if you were in it
are you
i would n't miss it
boy i 'd love to
but i 'm going to hollywood
are you an actor
hell yes
well okay i 'm still in school
but as soon as i graduate
california here i come
are you really serious
about acting
why
yes
then do n't go to hollywood
why
i 'm telling you straight if you have any serious ambitions stay clear of the place
it 'll crush you
you sound as if you hate it
no i do n't hate it
are n't you ever going back
... not if i can help it
gosh
you 'll break a lot of hearts
they 'll mend
what about your husband
what
will you be getting back together
when you quit hollywood i mean
what is this
is it true you 're getting a divorce
comrade
why you
you little bastard
okay then
well
you 're causin trouble you know that
i 'm causing trouble
you 're a pain in the butt
you newshounds've been after me and my folks ever since i won that dumb contest
i 'm just sixteen you know
who the hell cares what i think
not me
but other people seem to
yeah
well if you did n't put it in the papers -- nobody'd even know about it
now wait a minute sweetie
do i look like a newshound to you
no
actually you look more like a cop
i 'll
take your word for it
so who are you then
harry york
i work for martoni kaminski he 's running for congress here
oh yeah
i saw you in the newsreel
yeah well --
you know my dad 's done some work for kaminski
now you 're catchin on
do n't wanna get your daddy in hot water do you
whattaya mean
well
see the papers've got us pegged as pinkos then you come along the friendly neighborhood atheist --
but i 'm not
the newspapers're --
right again
you 're no more an atheist than my man 's a red but what they 're doin' see they 're addin up their version of your ideas with their version of ours
could look bad for your daddy
yeah
could look bad for you and kaminski too i guess
sure do n't talk like you 're sixteen
well are n't you the smoothie
now you 're going to ask for my number i suppose
i suppose not
got ta ask you this though for all our sakes you better keep your trap shut
well
i 'll give it a try mr. york
harry
harry
hi harry
did you see the play
you think i 'd miss it
well
what 'd you think
i just wanted to see how you looked
how 'd i look
enh
do n't be a rat harry
you looked okay
joint 's pretty dead
how 'bout i take you home
honest
when you were up there you were really
there know what i mean
everyone else looked stupid
i do n't know
i did
feel different
alive
yeah it 's a gift
you got ta do something with it
yeah but if i win this trip mama'll kill me
she hates russians
i do want to go though
to new york especially
but i wanted to do it
what
quietly
you 're not the quiet type frances
you know my old man was an inventor
spent his whole life down in the basement trying to design transcontinental underground railroads stuff like that
well i was supposed to be his partner
when i told him the smell of his workshop made me sick i thought he was going to die right there
what happened to him
he retired to florida
made a killing in vending machines
i kick myself sometimes but the thing is i would have been miserable living his life
... so you think i should go
sure
try this acting thing
you can make good money at it
i do n't know harry
i
i want so many
you do n't know what you want
yeah
frances
what
well
do n't you think it 's up to me to
come on harry
this is america land of the free
i thought we might go skinny dipping
for starters
jesus
yup
poor bastard lay there on the sidewalk and he could n't die
too god damn much heart
he just did n't want to die
but
but why harry
why 'd they do it
he would n't play ball
what can i tell ya
it 's done
anyway i did n't want to be next so i skipped town came down here to work for some big wig
tail and nail job
i 'm sort of a non gentleman 's non- gentleman
how d'ya like the camouflage
you jackass
c'mon let 's get out of here
not bad
it was slow at first but i 'm doing bits now
i always told ya frances
you got real ability
i know what ability you 're interested in
hey i 'm a man are n't i
whattaya say we have dinner then maybe head out to the beach rub some of this tan off each other
for old time 's sake
harry
i met someone
yeah
what is he -- muscleman
lifeguard
serious huh
yeah
hey that 's great farmer just great
shit
i meant the other way around
well the studio told me not to
is that why you did it
who ever thought they 'd be right for once
jesus harry
it 's a zoo back there --
you 're telling me
dick
and my mother
she acts like she 's on mars or something --
well she 's back to earth now
they 're all pretty huffed up about your leaving
i think you better go back kid
forget it
you know the funny thing is it 's not a great movie
i mean it could 've been but they screwed it up gave it a happy ending
and all my friends i know they 're going to smile and say they loved it
if they say they love it they 'll probably love it
not everybody lies you know
no they do n't do they
frances you 're a movie star now
if you give them what they want you can get anything
i do n't have what they want harry
harry will you tell me something
how can i keep making movies when people in the streets are starving
some people starve kid
until we can do something about it they might as well see a movie
makes 'em feel better
but i do n't want to be like that
i want to do something
what 're you gon na do waste your talent
why not use it to make something worthwhile
you can do that you know
yeah if i do n't make too big an ass of myself
tell you what
let 's ditch the limo
let me drive you up to that red carpet in my beat up chevy
the hell you will harry york
come on cinderella your pumpkin awaits
do n't start farmer
it 's midnight harry
my glittering raiments are dissolving
the chauffeur
he 's watching
he deserves a show
he missed the movie
i 'm serious frances
this is important
i know
how the hell do you find me anyway
animal magnetism
no ginger beer
what 's this red stuff
what 's left of my blood
think i 'll have a glass
help yourself
everyone else has
nice joint
can you afford it
nope
the studio pays
thank you harry
what for
for not chopping off his head and serving it to me on a platter
well i would have you know
i just did n't know how to cook it
six months probation
you got ta learn when to do battle farmer
you 're not going to win many bouts with 200 pound cops
i took the early rounds
i 'll bet
i do n't know
it hurts harry
some things no matter what you do with them they just hurt
so you drink and you fight with a cop
yeah and you look at people and you wonder who the hell they are what 's going on inside their heads
sometimes you can hear it like a buzzing the things that happen in their heads
and you wonder does anybody ever love anybody really
beats me
hey look i got some business down in san diego
whattaya say you come with me stay a few days
no harry i ca n't --
you 're coming
i just wanted to be part of something
one thing one play or one movie something that was really fine
memorable
and i could say i did that i made something good
and
well
to get a crack at something good you got ta earn it you got ta climb the ladder first
so you do you work hard and all these people behind you are pushing you up shouting you on
and then one day you realize you are you 're at the top
and there 's nothing there
and you look behind you and there 's no one below
you 're just left there all alone
swaying in the god damned breeze
take a walk pal
who said i was a lady
oh my god i look awful
you 've looked a whole lot better
c'mon
evening gorgeous
that sure looks like fun
you know how long it 's been since i was behind the wheel
forget it frances
you 're not driving
have i told you how mean you 're turning york
harry i have to go home
i have to talk to mama
frances you 're fulla drugs
you do n't know what you 're saying
who do you think put you into meadow wood
your mother thinks you 're crazy and she 'll keep on thinking it as long as it suits her
no she just did n't want me going to jail that 's all
yeah
she 's a shark frances
i 'm not taking you there and that 's that
you know something harry
i guess
aside from meanness you 're almost perfect
there 's only one other thing wrong with you
what 's that
you ca n't drink
ohhh that 's lousy scotch
hey
another shot for the lady and a double for me
what a man
hey you 're a good quarter horse kid but you ca n't go a route of ground
to quarter horses
no
to thoroughbreds
why are you always leaving me harry
huh
you should stickaround sometimes
look out for me
look frances i 'm only gon na ask this one time
i mean it
i swear after this i 'll never ask again will you marry me
i know a thing or two about marriage
you
you understand me more than anyone harry
maybe even more than mama
but
you 're too important to me
i 'd fail you
i do n't know how or why but i would
and that 's a chance i just ca n't take
do you understand
well
i 'll act like i do until i do
there 's just one more thing
what 's that
will you marry me
it 's not too late to keep going up to vancouver
be the smartest thing
thanks harry really but
i ca n't explain it
she 's my mother
she 's just
i ca n't give up on her that easy
you give up on her
yeah
it 's just
something i got ta do i guess
frances you 're crazy
i know
do n't tell anyone
anyway
if you need me
i got your number mister man
frances
frances
who
frances it 's me harry
... touch me again and i 'll kill you you pig
this is it kid
this is our chance
when you got a chance you better take it
yeah
i do n't know
you do n't need to screw around anymore
you do n't need dwayne steele or odets or your mother
you need me
i know but
there were so many people in there harry
every time i turned around someone was pressing against me
watching looking over my shoulder touching me grabbing sticking things into me
when i feel somebody near me now
anybody
my skin starts to crawl
been a lot of years you know
a long time waiting
for what
end up feeling like a sap
oh please harry
do n't even think it
you 're the only person who ever
it 's just
ca n't you wait for me
i do n't know
yes you do
if you love me you can wait right
a month six months whatever it takes
right
except
time has a way of --
no harry it 's not time it 's us
you and me
and i 'm telling you now that i 'll come to you okay
i 'll find you
i will
i hope so frances
c'mere
i want to talk to you
oh
why harry york
how nice to see you
how
how ya doin' farmer
fine thank you
did you watch the show
sure i did that 's why i 'm here
how did i look
oh you
ennh
well
you 're looking well
i got a new car
only it 's red
did you know mama died
yeah
yeah i heard about that
dad too
i sold the house
i 'm a faceless sinner harry
why do you say that
i 'd ask you to take me home but i 'm a faceless sinner
you smell good harry
familiar you know
i 'd ask you to take me home but
it 's going to be slow from now on
do you know what i mean harry
i 'm not sure
very slow
but we 're not going to stop are we
no
no we 're not
goodbye harry
it was very good to see you again
yes
would you like me to walk a little way with you
that would be okay
just a little way
pretty morning
it 's always beautiful at this time
peaceful
and no people
yes
shit
run
... is that not true
who 's writing this guy 's lines
answer the question
have you driven a car since you were placed on probation
no i could n't get my hands on one
have you reported to your probation officer as directed
i never saw him
why did n't he show up
did you expect him to look you up
why certainly
i wanted to get a peek at his face
you 're on your way to a contempt citation young lady
that 's fine with me
get it
fine
a fine
hey c'mon c'mon what is this an audience or a jury
miss farmer is it true you fought with the policeman who arrested you last night
sure it 's true
i was fighting for my country as well as myself
miss farmer you were advised at the last hearing that if you took one drink of liquor or failed to be a law abiding citizen --
miss farmer
in light of your flagrant disregard for the conditions of your probation coupled with the unwarranted assault on the plaintiff here
i am forced to order you to begin serving a sentence of 180 days in the county jail
fine
you are a deeply troubled young lady
i only hope you change your course before it 's too late
what happened
who 're you
who 're you
i live here
you 're farmer
oh
well look they took your stuff out
moved it to some hotel i think
what
i 'm preparin it for the next tenant he 's coming in tomorrow
and what 's the title of this seduc
assault
golden boy
that 's me clifford
i know but i 'm not seeing it
it 's there frances the fire is there but it 's not coming through
you 're lazy --
i 'm not
yes you win them you bring them into your heart touch them but you do n't set them on fire
but i want to
i 'm trying
i need an incendiary
an arsonist
then show me
that 's what i 'm here for to learn to grow
good
then it 's very simple
you have to stop being afraid frances
it 's in you
mama
i 'm not hungry
you two just enjoy yourselves
after all this is a celebration
do n't listen to him little sister
when you 're proud of what you are you do n't refuse the label understand
yes ma
and you
should be proud
you won that contest and made a name for yourself
but they 're using you
oh ma they 're not using me
it 's just a chance to travel see things
besides it 's the only way i can get to new york
i 'll pay your way to new york
i 'll work i 'll slave
i 'll sell my vegetables to the truck farmers or --
oh mama do n't you understand
it is n't in your hands mama
it 's my life
yes but important people are concerned about this
judge hillier spoke to alma styles --
i do n't care
... you will
it 's okay
smile little sister smile
it 's alright now little sister everything 's going to be just fine
mama what 's
shhh shhh
you 're not going to jail frances
the judge has put you under my care
i 'll see you get the rest you need
you 're taking me home
tell them who i am
tell them who i am
are you crazy
unhand that woman
that 's amelia earhart
oh mama i 'm so
tired of that song
please
i want you to
it would make me so happy
i think i need a little air
what 's wrong
nothing
i think i 'll just go out for awhile
where are you going
for a walk mama
just a walk
how long will you be
not long
i 'll have lunch ready by one
i 'll be back
at one
promise
sure
say you promise
i promise i 'll
i promise mama
you know the surest way to lose an appetite is to drink little sister
yes mama
i do n't want you drinking frances
yes mama
i 'm back mama
oh frances do i have news for you
guess who --
wait mama wait
i have something to tell you
i 've decided
well
i 'm not going to make movies anymore
i thought that 's what i wanted and i went after it with all my soul the way you taught me but i was miserable mama and it nearly killed me
so now
now it 's over
i want a different kind of life something
simple
i want to live someplace quiet and peaceful
in the country maybe and i 'll have dogs and cats -- i feel so light suddenly so clear for the first time in
it 's going to be okay mama i know it
and i love you
do n't
talk crazy
mama
they want you back
your agent called today
do n't you understand
he 's sending the scripts
he wants to fly up here in a week with the publicity people
frances you ca n't do this to your fans
why they 've been praying for you all through this nightmare
you ca n't turn your back on them now
look at this fan mail i 've been answering
of course she has n't anything definite in mind
no
no it all depends on what offers i get
oh just leave those things for now
no mama i 'll take care of it
i 'll wash them in the morning
you know little sister i never resented you for refusing to see me in the
the hospital
i knew you had to manage on your own before you could come back
thank you for understanding mama
little sister i do n't want you to feel any rush to get back to work
i want you to rest
for a while anyway
i will i promise
do i go right away or do i have time to take a bath
i was hoping for a kind word little sister
you were hoping for a kind word
you 're my mother
you 're supposed to nourish me
support me
i have
no
all you 've done is try to break my spirit try to turn me into you
but i 'm not you mother and i never will be and thank god for it
that goes for you too
and frankly i do n't know how with the two of you i turned out as sane as i am -- wait right there gentlemen i 'll be with you in a minute
and believe me i do n't want to stay here one second longer than i have to
but i 've got to tell you lillian that one day before you die you will realize what you 've done and hang your head in shame
in shame
but what --
no
you 're not talking now
you listen
you can send me away lillian you can pretend i 'm crazy and pretend i 'm still your little girl who ca n't take care of herself but one thing you ca n't pretend anymore
you ca n't pretend i love you because i do n't
i ca n't
not after what you 've done to me
because you see
i 'm still me
i 'm trying real hard all this time to be me
and you little sister you have n't been any help at all
okay boys i 'm ready
on behalf of the seattle ladies club as a token of our vast admiration --
excuse me
yes
do n't i know you
i do n't believe so
sure
you shouted at me in the auditorium when i read my essay
no my dear
you must be mistaken
oh bullshit
i find these initial meetings to be much easier without the concerned relatives in attendance
am i supposed to say thank you
thanks are hardly necessary
aw shucks ma'am
t'weren't nothin'
i 'm glad to see you have n't lost your sense of humor
it ai n't for lack of trying
so it seems
may we be serious for a moment
why doctor
we 've only just met
is there something else
you did n't say symington says
... i 'm sorry to keep you waiting the staff review ran over
did you enjoy your mother 's visit
yes
it was very good to see her
really
any problems
not at all
she brought me my fan mail
i had no idea there were so many strangers concerned about me
but i guess that 's the best thing about working in the movies
you make so many friends
i want to go back and show them that the faith they put in me was n't a mistake
you 're telling me you feel guilty
no
what i mean is
i 'm just very excited by the prospect of getting on with my life that 's all
do you really believe your mother 's trying to kill you
what
she told me you said mama you want to kill me
i never said
oh look
that 's just a figure of speech
she said something funny and i said
and you accused her of tampering with your mail
oh for christ 's
i 'm sorry
she misunderstood that 's all
but you tell me you had a pleasant visit and your mother says you were sullen and uncommunicative
whom do you think i should believe
doctor i hate to break this to you but my mother is a little batty
frances you 're still filled with anxiety
you feel guilty and hostile toward your family and friends
consequently i did n't recommend your release at the staff review
you what
mental illness is an elusive thing and though i 'm pleased you 're feeling more
capable it 's perhaps unrealistic to expect you to be completely cured after so short a time
do n't you agree
i 'm sure you 'll see it my way in the end
dr. symington how big is your dick
huh
'cause if it 's long enough which i doubt why do n't you wrap it around and fuck yourself in the ass
i want outta here you understand
i 'm ready to get out
so you go back there
you go back and you tell them to let me out
frances i 'm warning you
no i 'm warning you
who do you think you are god
you bumble around with your folders
and your pencils
and your god damn buttons
all your badges of authority
but you have no authority
you 're nothing
you 're a zero
symington says
sedate her
and do you think it 's radical for a man to have a job and feed a family
no
is it radical for you to have a hand in shaping your future and the future of your children
no
is it radical for the wealth of this country to be turned back to the people who built the country
no
no
good
because brothers that 's you
i longed to be with him
but i wanted his final moments to have peace
i could see you were a friend to him
what is that to you
evil as you are
i am as he made me
in his own image
you drove him to his torment
and he drove me to mine
then why weep for him
would you not
he was father
and mother
we fell from grace together
he from his god
i from mine
i 've never been shown a kindness
show me one now
what kindness
build for him a pyre
light up the sky with his passing
nice
the music
or the fire
i 'm glad you finally came to the door
a man should n't have to scurry in the shadows
better that way
for me
why
i 'm
very very ugly
people are afraid
except you
it ca n't be as bad as that
worse
you 're an outcast
yes
i have been seeking my friends
friends
do they live around here
yes
very close
why do you not go to them
i have been
afraid
afraid
they will hate me
because i am so very ugly
and they are so very beautiful
people can be kinder than you think
i am afraid
come warm yourself if you like
you speak
yes i speak
and read
and think
and know the ways of man
i 've been waiting for you
two months now
how did you find me
the letters in your journal
that and a geography book
your elizabeth sounds lovely
kill me and have done with it
kill you
hardly that
then why am i here
what did you want with me
more to the point why am i here
what did you want with me
what does one say to one 's maker having finally met him face to face
milton gave it voice
did i request thee maker from my clay to mould me man
did i solicit thee from darkness to promote me
fine words from a child killer
you who murdered my brother
your crime
as well as mine
how dare you
you 're disgusting and evil
evil
do you believe in evil
i see it before me
i 'm not sure i believe
but then i had no one to instruct me
i had no mother
and my father abandoned me at birth
what can i do
there is something i want
a friend
friend
a companion
a female
like me so she wo n't hate me
like you
oh god you do n't know what you 're asking
i do know that for the sympathy of one living being i would make peace with all
i have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine
and rage the likes of which you would not believe
if i can not satisfy the one i will demonically indulge the other
that choice is yours
you 're the one who set this in motion frankenstein
and if i consent
we 'd travel north my bride and i. to the furthest reaches of the pole where no man has ever set foot
there we would live out our lives
together
no human eye would ever see us again
this i vow
soon
yes
i want this over and done with
i 'll be waiting
and watching
why
her
her body pleases me
what is this
a brain
extremities
this was not taken from a grave
what does it matter
she 'll live again
you 'll make her
no
i draw the line
you will honor your promise to me
i will not
kill me now
that is mild compared to what will come
if you deny me my wedding night
i 'll be with you on yours
she 's beautiful
she 's not for you
i 'm sure the lady knows her own mind
does n't she
let her decide the proper suitor
get away from her
she 's mine
she'll never be yours
she said my name
she remembers
poor william
what indignant tears
there there
shhh
you dance so beautifully together
and you look so lovely
must 've been a terrible row
he was almost expelled for calling one of his professors a pompous
fellow
nothing
still nothing
it 's been months
it 's not like him
something 's wrong
i know it
i 've heard rumors of cholera spreading south from hamburg
so have i
i should go
i should leave today
elizabeth
if it 's true travel into germany would be banned
you 'd never get near ingolstadt
besides they 're only rumors
and not a word of them to father
he 's agitated enough not hearing from victor
read him one of the old letters and rephrase it
we 'll say it came today
it 'll set his mind at ease
are you all right
fine
he always was opinionated
he set things right with a proper apology
and now they 've put him in charge of dissection lab
what does it say
let this locket be a token of the vow we took the night i left
he 's coming home to marry me
have you seen willie
is he not back yet
claude rode over there to see if held lost track of time
they say he never arrived
it 's far too late for him to still be out
do n't cry elizabeth
are n't you
what kind of god is he to will this
she was mother to me as well
but ours is the job of the living
it 's up to us now to hold this family together
we must think of father and be strong for him
i can not do that alone
god took her from us
he left a beautiful gift in her place
a baby boy
to cherish and love as our very own
your brother
victor have a care
you 'll make him dizzy
the world is a dizzying place
oh do give him here
he needs to be comforted and held
he needs to vent his outrage to the skies
make yourself heard willie
learning to walk is not an easy thing
why should it be so
do n't listen willie
progress is a feast to be consumed
women would have you believe you must walk before you can run
or run before you can waltz
give me that child before you fill his head with drivel
smell the air
wonderful
quite a send off is n't it
father 's so proud
and you
prouder still
you 'll be the handsomest student there
i 'll have to do better than that
you will
what do you want victor
to be the best there ever was
to push our knowledge beyond our dreams
to eradicate disease and pestilence
to purge mankind of ignorance and fear
i 've loved you all my life
all my life i 've known
this feels
incestuous
is that what makes it so delicious
brother and sister still
i wish to be your husband
i wish to be your wife
then come with me to ingolstadt
marry me now
if only i could
but one of us must stay
father 's not strong
willie 's just a child
who can look after them in your absence
who can run the estate
only you
i will be here when you return
my mind was not playing tricks
he was there in the storm
gloating over his crimes
challenging me to come
but why risk yourself
has n't this family suffered enough
i 've no choice
if what you say is true it is a matter for the police
they 've done a fine job
hanging an innocent for the crime of a fiend
do you know this man
is there something between you
i know only that he is a killer
and i shall bring back his carcass
i thought i 'd never see you again
i 'm all right
i 'm safe
what sort of task
it 's not something i can explain now
perhaps someday
what of our marriage
victor we 've had so much tragedy
i want this family to live again
so do i.
we need each other now i need your comfort and strength not separation and solitude
a month at most that 's all i ask
elizabeth please
things have not yet resolved
i must take steps to see that they do
for our family 's sake
for our sake
you are life itself
we shall seal our vow
the moment i am done
no
not tomorrow not next week marry me today
why the change
what about your work
it was misguided and pointless
is your answer yes
it is
we 'll leave this afternoon right after the ceremony
pack only what you need
does this have something to do with that man you saw
yes
we 're in danger here
every moment we stay
victor tell me why
trust me
i do
but you must trust me for now
brother and sister no more
now husband and wife
i remember the first time i ever saw you
crossing the floor of the grand ballroom with my parents at your side
so beautiful even then
i have been waiting for this ever since
victor
open this door for no one
a warming wind
this ice will break yet
how 's our guest
he died
raving about phantoms
he was mad poor devil
gather a detail
have the body removed from my cabin
aye captain
i 'm quite serious
look at all the charity and clinic work we do
up until thirty years ago the concept of vaccine was unheard of
you 're saying all disease will eventually be eradicated
i 'm convinced
not by treating symptoms but by diving nature 's most jealously guarded secrets
do you foresee this happening in our lifetimes
no
but someday
thank goodness
we 'd be out of work
professor
oh god
i was just clearing my throat
very well then
i am not mad
as a march hare
are you having me on
of course i am
it pays to humor the insane
henry clerval
victor victor frankenstein
i know
you have a way of making an impression
do you really think i 'm mad
come now
magnus
agrippa
next thing you know you 'll be teaching toadstools to speak
now you 've got him started
these are exciting times henry
we 're entering an era of amazing breakthroughs
look at edward jenner
he was n't content to bleed people with leeches he pioneered a new frontier of thought
... yes and thanks to him smallpox has been virtually eliminated
i 've heard this speech before
but you have n't listened never in history has so much seemed possible
we 're on the verge of answers undreamt of
but only if we have the courage to ask the questions
only you would think of that
somebody has to
and here 's to him
everything in moderation frankenstein
nothing in moderation clerval
they just caught the man who did it
he was a frightened soul who acted out of fear and ignorance
they 'll hang him all the same
good
i 'll be there to hear his worthless neck snap
keep your voice down
you do n't know what you 're saying
it was wrong henry
it should n't have happened
the bastard deserves to die
you 're making a scene
why waldman
he of all people should have cheated death
you ca n't
death is god 's will
i resent god 's monopoly
that 's blasphemy
blasphemy be damned
waldman spent his life trying to help people
all the more reason for us to continue his work with the poor
no
he had more important work
there are sick people who need our help
here and now
not in some future time
consider that
victor
this has got to stop
nobody 's seen you in months
you have n't attended a single class
i 've been preoccupied
we all know how hard you took waldman 's death
even krempe is sympathetic
but it is time to move on
it is time to concern yourself with life
that is my concern
i 'm involved in something just now
i want to finish it in waldman 's memory
how much longer
few months perhaps
i 'm gathering the raw materials even now
this is a bad time henry
i 'm busy just now
what do you want
things have gone worse with this cholera outbreak
thousand new cases a day now
classes have been suspended
university 's shut down
yes
and
listen to what i 'm saying
the militia 's arriving to quarantine the city
most of us are getting out while we still can
you 'll be leaving then
just as well
you never were cut out for this henry
goodbye
quite a place
thank you henry
for what
this
my home
my family
if not for you i 'd be dead in a burial pit somewhere
what happened up there
i did n't find what i was looking for
are you sure you 'll be all right
yes do n't worry
i 'll look after your father
you look after her
i 'll be back as soon as i 've got her far away and safe
we 'll hunt this fiend down together
only if you 'll tell me who he is
i owe you that
done
all that i once loved lies in a shallow grave
by my hand
let it go
yes
i took refuge in the barn
would n't you
lost in the storm
freezing and wet
i was exhausted and could search no longer
and is it true miss moritz that you love victor frankenstein
that your heart was broken
answer the question
do you love victor frankenstein
i have always loved him
is it also not true that you murdered his brother william in a misdirected crime of passion
murder willie
in my heart he was our child
victor 's and mine
such a thing could never have entered my mind
so you have claimed
yet you have no explanation for this
the locket last seen in the hands of the poor murdered child was found hidden in your dress the morning following the murder
the locket you so coveted
how did it come to be in your possession
i have no knowledge of that
in science the letter of fact is the letter of law
our pursuit is as dogmatic as any religious precept
think of yourselves as disciples of a strict and hallowed sect
someday you may be priests
but only if you learn the scripture chapter and verse
any questions
but surely professor you do n't intend we disregard the more
philosophical works
philosophical
those which stir the imagination as well as the intellect
paracelsus for one
paracelsus
or albertus magnus
cornelius agrippa
what is your name
victor frankenstein sir
of geneva
of geneva
tell me mr. frankenstein of geneva
do you wish to study medicine
or mysticism
preposterous
i once saw it done as a boy in canton
my parents were missionaries
the cure was nothing short of miraculous
i 've never forgotten it
been fascinated ever since
electricity
it 's utterly fantastic
this is the sort of thing i 'm talking about
we should be learning this
why
god alone knows what it means
until it has proven value it 's nothing more than a ghoulish parlor trick
hardly fit for the classroom
but the possibilities
combining ancient knowledge with new
something like this could change our fundamental views
it is a thrilling direction to explore
thrilling and dangerous
nature can be wonderful and terrible
science is not a realm for the reckless it needs a conscience
we must proceed cautiously
assess as we go
what i do on my own time is my own business
the same holds true for you
you wish to expand your mind
fine do so
you can even join me here if you like
but not at the expense of your normal studies
i doubt that decision is still mine to make
nonsense
tonight you will draft an apology to professor krempe
a sincere and heartfelt apology which you will then read aloud to him before the assembled student body and faculty
why
our profession needs talent like yours
destroy your career over an issue of pride
what a waste
re configure the leads
numbers four and twelve directly into the nervous system
victor
he was trying to be gracious
the strain was evident
i tell you what we need my friends
forget the symptoms and diseases
what we need is a vaccine for death itself
oh now you have gone too far
there 's only one god victor
you 're awake
i 've prepared some broth
it 'll help restore you
i 'm
dying
frostbite
gangrene
a simple diagnosis
are you a physician
how is it you come to be here
there 's a startling question coming from you
i 'm captain of this ship
we sailed from archangel a month ago seeking a passage to the north pole
ah
an explorer
would be
i 'm plagued with my share of difficulties just at the moment
i heard
i ca n't say i blame them
we 're trapped in this ice and bedeviled by some sort of
creature
creature
a
human like creature
you know of it
your men are right to be afraid
then explain it whatever it is
it could save the voyage
i 've spent years planning this
my entire fortune
you 'd persist at the cost of your own life
the lives of your crew
lives are ephemeral
the knowledge we gain the achievements we leave behind
those live on
he 's dead
she 's dead
all dead
please save me
oh
poor bill
oh my god oh my god
oh god
it will be all right
i 'll take care of you
jack
marcie
ned
it 's just this place
the storm
that 's why you 're all upset
no no they 're all dead
so young so pretty
what monster could have done such a thing
bill -- bill -- bill is out there
the killer is still out there
i will protect you
we should go now
maybe we should wait for mr. christy
what 'd you see
i do n't know
marcie 's got me paranoid
shows how much you know
it 's something about tomorrow
tomorrow is another day
right
right
melvin belli
i was careless
cabin b is ready
push on this side
alice this is jack marcie and ned
push
that 's got her
thanks
i 'm steve christy
welcome to camp crystal lake
you got some grubby clothes
climb into 'em
alice see if bill has cleaned out the boathouse
i want him to start with the canoes
what happened to brenda
you told her to sweep the courts
you draw very well
oh thanks
i wish i could spend more time at it
any particular reason
just a feeling
nothing personal
you want to leave
i do n't know
probably be best for everybody
you may not care a lot about this place alice but i mean to make it my whole life
it 's been my whole life
gimme a chance
stay a week
help get it ready
next friday if you 're not happy i 'll put you on the bus myself
i 'll be grateful
next friday
thanks alice
i 've got to go to town and pick up the trailer and all that other stuff but i 'll be back around ten
if you 're still up we can talk okay
sure
steve said for you to start on the boats
i finished the boats
alice
the others show up
everybody except the girl who 's supposed to handle the kitchen
annie
oh my god
you okay
how come you 're leaving
it 's long and personal
it has nothing to do with you or the other kids
maybe i can help
and it 's this place
it makes no sense but it spooks me
you 're right
it makes no sense
filmmaker
artist
it still hurts
i walked into it knowing i 'd get hurt but i thought i could stand anything
i just was n't ready for that kind of pain
we were supposed to meet in l.a. when i got back there he sent a telegram saying he was going back to his wife
what 'll you do when you leave here
i do n't know
i did n't know i was asleep
what time is it
almost five
you can only do what you can do
and then steve looks at you with those hurt eyes -- like you do n't care about children
jack and marcie are gon na be drenched
not if they 're where i think they are
it would n't matter except steve should be getting back pretty soon
it would n't look so great if he fell over them
good point
well it has n't been that long
help you clean up
absolutely
i do n't hear it anymore
ca n't hear anything through that wind and rain
it sounded like brenda
i 'll go take a look
did somebody leave the lights on at the softball field
where
they 're off now
i 'll go check on brenda
okay
jack
marcie
hey guys
it 's dead
try the pay phone
do you have a dime
a quarter
no
there must be some in the desk somewhere
how come
some campers drowned
then some counselors got killed
i 'll be along
do n't burn that gorgeous body or i 'll scratch your eyes out
i 'm sorry
ned
we 're gon na be working together for a while
you 're a nice guy without all the entertainment okay
sure
i 'm gon na go lie down and catch some z 's
today wiped me out
thanks alice
you 're welcome
you said we were special
i meant everything
you know what i said though
i ca n't barry
i would n't know
oh you
claudette
somebody'll see
no they wo n't
give me a hand
for sure
this is almost like the one at my uncle 's cabin in maine
here we go
i 'll be okay
holy shit
do n't get up
take a second
you saved my life
i had to
thanks
i figured if i did n't save you
i 'd have to give you mouth to mouth and that would have ruined my appetite
floor probably leaks
this area is full of springs
a short somewhere
what is it
is it stuck
roll him over
get behind him more
chance to get even
i 'll spot you five points
you ever fire one of those bows again and i 'll tack you up on the wall to dry
god but i love that sexy talk
what do you want to be when you grow up
dancer
holy shit
we would n't want you thinking you 're the only show off in camp would we
no wonder they lost america
how could you sneak around in the bushes wearing that
what 's to eat
whatever you make yourself
what hath god wrought
that was the telephone
ha
you wily oriental
the phone was mr. watson come in here i need you
what hath god wrought was the telegraph
ha
sometimes i only think about kissing women
ow
i was just wondering if you thought there 'd by any other gorgeous women at camp crystal lake
besides yourself
what about the dope paragraph in mr. christy 's letter
quote controlled substances are expressly forbidden
possession or use of marijuana or alcohol on campgrounds will means instant dismissal
unquote
steve taught me how to use the emergency generator
the town power lines are supposed to be real shitty
god but i love that macho talk
emergency generators
the indian used campfires
how about our last jay
good call
just a walk for chrissakes
boy we sure do have a lot of filthy small minded people around here
wait a minute i 'll get my diaphragm and be right with you
wind 's up
it 's shifted a good hundred and eighty degrees
makes me want to hold on and never let go
i love you
i love you
what about neddy
i do n't love neddy
he keeps on acting like such an asshole
ned
do n't call him
i thought you wanted to give him one of your motherly lectures
ned is gon na do whatever he wants to do you know
i guess
looks like a storm
i 'm a little scared of storms
always have been
since i was a kid
you
the brick
it 's just a dream
i call it my shower dream
this is no dream
want to escape for a while
lead the way
sex is all you ever think of neddy
there you are dead wrong
it 's beautiful
yeah and it also look like it has n't seen a coat of paint in six years
cowboy
girls ca n't be cowboys
okay fireman
doctor
now if you were a flavor of ice cream what would you be
rocky road
last line of gone with the wind
frankly scarlet i do n't give a damn
you okay
those things can be nasty
wait'll you 're really in trouble and see what happens
but it 's in the brochure
camp crystal lake has a full drama program
you just saw it
anything else you want
no thanks
i 'm fine
sandy
you ca n't go back there tonight
not in that stuff
less you wanta get drownded
i got to
aw
i told you not to buy that hunk of junk
i think water got into the electrical system
you ride me back to camp
i 'll get one of my counselors to drive me back tomorrow morning
why not
bad enough we got a full moon it 's friday the 13th
they keep statistics
we get more accidents more robberies more rapes more homicides more of everything when there 's a full moon
it affects people
makes 'em nuts
you 've made a science out of coincidence
have to drop you here steve
sure
good luck
another coincidence
yeah
how many with you
just my son and i.
what is your purpose in mexico
vacation
i 'm taking him to see his first bullfight
what was that
oh that 's just my daughter in the bathroom
you said it was just you and your son
i meant me my son and my daughter
open the door
i 'm coming aboard
whatsamatter with you
are you crazy
why the fuck outta all the god forsaken shit holes in mexico did you have us rendezvous at that place
i do n't know one place 's as good as another
have you ever been there before
no but i passed by it a couple of times
it 's out in the middle of nowhere
it seems like a rowdy place so there would n't be a lot of police
and it 's open from dusk till dawn
you said meet you in the morning
well because you picked that place out of a hat my brother 's dead now
and this girl 's family 's dead
i 'm sorry to hear that
what were they psychos
did they look like psychos
they were fuckin vampires
psychos do n't explode when sunlight hits 'em i do n't care how crazy they are
we got about two more hours of day light left
that 'll get us into el paso which is right next to the border
we 'll stop at a motel --
stop
we 're not going to actually stop at a motel are we
unless you two wiseacres wanna be introduced to the joys of hitchhiking what say we drop this
the truth hurts
why do you want to stop
i 'm exhausted
lie in the back dad i 'll drive us into mexico
what 's this guy 's problem
i have no idea
what are you gon na do
i 'm gon na try and get us across the border
no dad you got ta tell 'em that they 're back there
have you forgotten about your sister
they 're gon na kill us
they get us across the border they 're gon na take us out in the desert and shoot us
if they get over the border they 're gon na let us go
dad i watch those reality shows
they never let anybody go
any cop will tell you in a situation like this you get a chance you go for it
this is our chance
what about kate
they 're gon na kill her anyway
at least now with all these cops we 've got a fighting chance
son i have this situation under control
i know exactly what i 'm doing
you 're going to have to trust me on this
if trusting you means trusting those fuckin killers i ca n't do that
if you do n't tell the cops i will
now you listen to me
you ai n't gon na do a goddamn fucking thing you hear me
nobody cares what you think i 'm running this show i make the decisions
he 's running the show
i 'm running the show
i make the plays and you back the plays i make
stop thinking with your fucking balls
kate in a room with a couple of desperate men with nothing to fucking lose ai n't the time to go for it
i need your cover
cover my ass
you do n't believe in suicide
it 's not suicide if you 're already dead
two
okay i 'll kill you when you change i swear to god in jesus christ 's name
thank you son
what 's the story with you two
you a couple of fags
he 's my son
how does that happen
you do n't look japanese
neither does he
he looks vietnamese
oh well excuse me all to hell
what 's this about money
it 's about money all right but not yours
you see me and my brother here are in a little hot water and we need your assistance
it 's okay honey
everything 's going to be all right
just listen to daddy sugar and do n't do nothin' stupid
you two simon says sit the fuck down
where are the keys to the motor home
on the dresser
richie take the keys
start that big bastard up and drive it up front
not a chance
come again
if you 're taking people take me
but my kids are n't going anywhere with you
sorry i need everybody
my children are not going with you and that 's that
that 's not fuckin that
this is fuckin this
go sit over there
yes
good
your old man 's all right he just saved your life
jacob fuller
jacob that 's biblical ai n't it
what am i askin for of course it is
what are their names
scott and kate
who 's this
my wife
where is the little lady
in heaven
she 's dead
yes she is
how 'd she die
auto wreck
come on gimme some more details
how 'd it happen
some fuckin drunk kill her
no
it was a rainy night the brakes on the car were n't great
she had to stop suddenly
she slid on the road she crashed she died
died instantly
not quite
she was trapped in the wreck for about six hours before she passed on
whewww
those acts of god really stick it in and break it off do n't they
yes they do
is this real
yes
i 've seen one of these before
a friend of mine had himself declared a minister of his own religion
away to fuck the irs
is that what you 're doing or are you the real mccoy
real mccoy
you 're a preacher
i was a minister
was
as in not anymore
yes
why 'd ya quit
i think i 've gotten about as up close and personal with you as i 'm gon na get
now if you need me like i think you need me you 're not gon na kill me 'cause i wo n't answer your stupid prying questions
so with all due respect mind your own business
i seem to have touched a nerve
do n't be so sensitive pops let 's keep this friendly
but you 're right enough with the getting to know you shit
now there 's two ways we can play this hand
one way is me and you go round an round all fuckin night
the other way is we reach some sort of an understanding
now if we go down that first path at the end of the day i 'll win
but we go down the second we 'll both win
now i do n't give a rat 's ass about you or your fuckin family
y'all can live forever or die this second and i do n't care which
the only things i do care about are me that son of a bitch in the back and our money
and right now i need to get those three things into mexico
now stop me if i 'm wrong but i take it you do n't give a shit about seeing me and my brother receiving justice or the bank getting its money back
right now all you care about is the safety of your daughter your son and possibly yourself
am i correct
yes
i thought so
you help us get across the border without incident stay with us the rest of the night without trying anything funny and in the morning we 'll let you and your family go
that way everybody gets what they want
you and your kids get out of this alive and we get into mexico
everybody 's happy
how do i know you 'll keep your word
jesus christ pops do n't start with this shit
you want me to sit here and be passive
the only way being passive in this situation makes sense is if i believe you 'll let us go
i 'm not there yet
you have to convince me you 're telling the truth
look dickhead the only thing you need to be convinced about is that you 're stuck in a situation with a coupla real mean motor scooters
i do n't wanna hafta worry about you all fuckin night
and i do n't think you wanna be worrying about my brother 's intentions toward your daughter all night
you notice the way he looked at her did n't ya
yes
did n't like it did ya
no i did n't
did n't think so
so as i was saying i 'm willing to make a deal
you behave get us into mexico and do n't try to escape
i 'll keep my brother off your daughter and let you all loose in the morning
you wo n't let him touch her
i can handle richie do n't worry
i 'm telling you do n't hurt her
as long as you 're cool she 'll be cool
what 're ya gon na say
i do n't have the slightest idea
well you just keep thinkin of that gun next to kate 's temple
we did our part we gotcha in mexico
now it 's time for your part letting us go
pops when you 're right you 're right and you are right
then
then stop 'cause that 's where we 're going
out of the stew pot and into the fire
shit i been to bars make this place look like a fuckin 4-h club
who else
pass
why not against your religion
no i do drink i 'm just not drinking now
suit yourself more for me
scotty
why are you so agitated
i 'm still stewing about that ape laying hands on me
and that fuckin bartender sticks a weed up my ass too
he backed down
he 's smilin at us
but behind his smile he 's sayin fuck you jack
i hear that loud and clear
what are you going to do
i 'm gon na just sit here and drain this bottle
and when i 've drunk the last drop if i still feel then the way i feel now i 'm gon na take this bottle and break it over his melon head
before we stepped in here you told all of us to be cool
that means you too
i never said do what i do i said do what i say
are you so much a fucking loser you ca n't tell when you 've won
what did you call me
nothing
i did n't make a statement
i asked a question
would you like me to ask it again
very well
are you such a loser you ca n't tell when you 've won
the entire state of texas along with the fbi is looking for you
did they find you
no
they could n't
they had every entrance to the border covered
there 's no way you could get across
did you
yes you did
you 've won seth enjoy it
to your family
to yours
you too preacher
i 'm like you
i do n't believe in vampires but i believe in what i saw
good for you
now since we all believe we 're dealing with vampires what do we know about vampires
crosses hurt vampires
do you have a cross
in the winnebago
in other words no
i do n't know about that
in order for it to have any power i think it 's got ta be an official crucifix
what 's an official cross
some piece of tin made in taiwan
what makes that official
if a cross works against vampires it 's not the cross itself it 's what the cross represents
the cross is a symbol of holiness
okay i 'll buy that
so we got crosses covered moving right along what else
did he
yep
you all are gon na fuckin die
i 'm gon na fuckin kill every last one of you godless pieces of shit
you bet your sweet ass you are and i 'm gon na help you do it
but we ai n't got much time
what 's this stuff
my guess is that this little dive 's been feeding on nomad road waifs like bikers and truckers for a longtime
this is probably some of the shipments they stole off the trucks
well i say lets tear this place apart for weapons
so when they burst through that door we 'll make 'em wish they never did
i do n't give a shit about living or dying anymore
i just want to send as many of these devils back to hell as i can
amen
i promise
kate scott
it 's the bitterest of pills
you two ought to start a stand up act because you 're just wasting your humor on me
ai n't it the truth
i just bet you would
do n't even think about it
besides i want to have one night 's sleep in an honest- to goodness bed
the beds in the home are okay but they 're not like a real bed
hey if we go to a motel we can swim
it has a bed
that 's all i care about
other places have beds they also have cable tv a gym room service
about two hours from now
so all we have to do is get by for a few more hours and then we can walk right out the front door
you 're gon na be okay are n't you daddy
no i 'm not
i 've been bit
in effect i 'm already dead
i promise
scott
kate we do n't have all day so i 'm only gon na count to five
one
two
three
four
okay okay i promise i 'll do it
not good enough swear to god
i swear to god our father that when you change into one of the undead i will kill you
good girl
now scott we have even less time so i 'm only giving you the count of three
one
i 'm going for 'em
no
everybody goes home
what 's going on
we 're having a wet bikini contest and you just won
richie will you do me a favor and eat my pussy
sure
creepy guy
the sword of damocles is lifted from above seth 's head
he 's just solved a problem that a mere thirty seconds ago seemed unsolvable
he knows exactly how he 's going to cross the border
whistling a happy tune he turns and walks back into room 9
you got three minutes
one second longer i shoot your father in the face
do you understand what i just said
yes
do you believe me
yes
you damn well better
go
yeah
you must have a bible in here do n't cha
yeah we got a bible
get it and bring it up here will ya please
you 're gon na let us go
in the morning darlin in the morning we are g o n e and you are f r e e. now i know i put you guys through hell and i know i 've been one rough pecker but from here on end you guys are in my cool book
scotty help me pick richie up and lay him down
jacob keep going on this road till you get to a sign that says digayo
when you get to digayo turn this big bastard left go on down for a few miles then you see a bar called the titty twister
from what i hear you ca n't miss it
how about you cutie pie
ready for round two
okay
are you okay
peachy
why should n't i be
the world 's my oyster except for the fact that i just rammed a wooden stake in my brother 's heart because he turned into a vampire even though i do n't believe in vampires
aside from that unfortunate business everything 's hunky dory
i 'm really sorry
bullshit
you hate us
if you had half a chance you 'd feed us to them
we have to go back for daddy
daddy 's dead
noooo
watch my back
anytime
i 'm sorry
me too
see ya
later
why just look at all this
you got your kitchen --
-- you got your microwave --
-- you got your sink --
-- you got your shower --
-- see this television
feel this real wood paneling
that 's real wood too not that fake stuff
for the time being we are very confident we will apprehend the fugitives in the next forty eight hours
the bureau local law enforcement and the texas rangers have all joined forces in forming a dragnet to snare seth and richard gecko
agent chase does it appear that they are heading for mexico
yes it does kelly
we have already alerted the mexican authorities
they intend to cooperate every way possible in bringing these fugitives to justice
are you optimistic about the safety of the hostage they took in abilene gloria hill
we 've received no news one way or the other
we can only hope for the best
what about the report from an eyewitness at the liquor store who said one of the brothers was shot
this ca n't be confirmed at this time but we do believe it to be true
we have reason to believe it was the youngest brother richard and he was shot in the vicinity of his neck and shoulders by the store 's clerk
is it safe to assume that because the death count involved and the loss of life of law enforcement officers that the bureau the rangers and the police force are taking this manhunt personally
i would say that 's a very safe assumption
hot goddamn day
have n't felt it a bit
been inside with the air conditioner blastin all day long
not even for lunch
i 'm by myself today ate my lunch outta the microwave
jesus christ man that microwave food will kill ya as quick as a bullet
those burritos are only fit for a hippie high on weed
pull me down a bottle of jack daniels
i 'm gettin tanked tonight
whatsamatter
awww it 's just been a shitass day
every inch of it hot and miserable
first off nadine at the blue chip got some sorta sick so that mongoloid boy of hers was workin the grill
that fuckin idiot do n't know rat shit from rice krispies
i ate breakfast at nine was pukin up pigs in a blanket like a sick dog by ten thirty
is n't there a law or something against retards serving food to the public
well if there ai n't there sure oughta be
who knows what goes on inside mongoloid 's mind
you could sue the shit out of her ya know
that kid belongs under a circus tent not flippin burgers
you could own that fuckin place
what the hell would i do with that grease pit
besides nadine 's got enough of a cross to bear just taking care of that potato head
then all this abilene shit happened
you heard about that bank robbery in abilene did n't ya
that 's all that 's been on the box all day
they killed some people did n't they
four rangers three cops and two civilians
and they took a lady bank teller as a hostage
they 'll probably make a run for the border which would bring 'em this way
and if we get our hands on those shit asses we 're talking payback time
we 'll get 'em all right
i got ta piss
i 'm gon na use your commode
knock yourself out
yeah and i 'm gon na be right back at it tomorrow
so tonight i 'm gon na sit in front of the box and just drink booze
how much is the bottle
six fifty
he says you were scratching
i was n't scratching
you callin him a liar
i never said help us
well that do n't matter now 'cause you got about two fuckin seconds to live
richie
whiskey
you ca n't come in here
what dya mean
this is a private club
you 're not welcome
are you tellin me i 'm not good enough to drink here
this bar is for bikers and truckers only
you get out
best in mexico
i kinda doubt that
we 're grabbin a table send over a waitress to take our order
what the fuck was that about
he signaled the ranger
what the fuck is wrong with you --
seth he did it
you were by the beer cooler with your back turned
i was by the magazines i could see his face
and i saw him mouth
start the car
you believe me do n't cha
shut up and start the car
richie
you okay
i 'm not dead but i 'm definitely shot
i told you that bastard said help us
do they have cable
no
do they have an x rated channel
no
do they have a waterbed
they do n't have anything except four walls and a roof and that 's all we need
how 's it feel
how ya think it hurts like a son of- a bitch
i got both rooms on either side of us so we do n't got ta worry about eavesdropping assholes
how 's that feel
you okay
feels good
i 'm gon na go get the money
hey when you talk to him see if you can arrange a better deal than thirty percent
that 's their standard deal brother
they ai n't about to change it for us
did you even to try to negotiate
these guys ai n't spic firecracker salesman from tijuana
they do n't even know the meaning of the word barter
you wanna stay in el ray
you give them thirty percent of your loot
it 's scripture
so it is written so shall it be done
you want sanctuary you pay the price and the price is thirty percent
all i 'm saying --
-- this conversation is over
shit i started to get worried
where the fuck ya been
sight seein
what 'd ya see
cops
didya look at the border
yeah i saw the border
through binoculars from on top of a high building
that 's about as close as i risked getting
what 's the tv say
they 're going to apprehend us in forty eight hours
i got ta figure a way to get across that goddamn border
longer we fuck around el paso our lives ai n't worth a shit
look fuck the border
let 's just dig in and wait for things to cool down
richie it 's gon na get a lot fuckin worse before it gets any fuckin better
we showed our ass in texas
we killed texas fuckin rangers
they ai n't gon na stop lookin till they find us and when they find us they 're gon na kill us
texans take it very personal when ya kill their law enforcement officers
the el paso police have already started a motel and hotel search for us
how do you know
i heard it on the radio
we got ta get our asses into mexico tonight
carlos is gon na meet us tomorrow morning at a rendezvous on the other side then carlos and his boys will escort us to el ray and --
where 's the woman
what
is this my fault
do you think this is what i am
what
this is not me
i am a professional fucking thief
i steal money
you try to stop me god help you
but i do n't kill people i do n't have to and i do n't rape women
what you doin' ai n't how it 's done
do you understand
seth if you were me --
just say yes
nothing else just say yes
yes
yes seth i understand
yes seth i understand
richard
what
this is n't gon na work
shut up
it 's gon na work just fine
i just want to go on record as saying this is a bad idea
duly noted
now shut up
they 're gon na search the van
as long as you do n't act like a fuckin nut we 'll be just fine
what does that mean
what
you just called me a fuckin nut
no i did n't
yes you did
you said as long as i do n't act like a fuckin nut implying that i 've been acting like a fuckin nut
take a pill kid
i just meant stay cool
you meant that but you meant the other too
this ai n't the time richard
fuck those spic pigs
you called me a fuckin nut and where i come from that stops the train on its tracks
keep your voice down
or what
i 'm curious
what was the nuttiest thing i did
this ai n't the time
oh i know was it possibly when your ass was rotting in jail and i broke it out
yeah you 're right that was pretty fuckin nutty
not to mention stupid
but you know what
i can fix that right now
you okay
yeah i think so
what happened
i do n't know you just passed out
i did
yeah we were just standing there
you said something about your shoulder hurting then you just hit the ground like a sack of potatoes
really
yeah when you fell your head smacked the toilet hard
it scared the shit outta me
sure you 're okay
yeah i guess
i 'm just a little fucked up
well let me tell ya something gon na clear your head right up
we are officially mexicans
what
we are
south of the border down mexico way
we are
yep
we 're heading for the rendezvous right now
we get there we pound booze till carlos shows up he escorts us to el ray
and then me and you brother kick fuckin back
how ya like them apples
how
where are you right now
what do you mean
where are you
i 'm here with you
no you 're not
you 're sippin margaritas in el ray
but we 're not in el ray
we 're here -- getting ready to go in there
you 're so pleased with yourself about getting into mexico you think the job 's down
it ai n't
get back on the clock
that 's a fuck with you bar
we hang around there for a coupla hours in all likelihood we 'll get fucked with
so get your shit together brother
my shit is together
it do n't look together
well it is
just because i 'm happy does n't mean i 'm on vacation
you 're just not used to seein me happy 'cause it 's been about fifteen fuckin years since i been happy
but my shit is forever together
earth to richie
do n't you wanna ask your new friend to join us
yeah
well then ask her dumb ass
por favor senorita
would you care to join us
how are you
scarred for life that 's how i am
how 'bout you
you are safer in here with us than wandering around a mexican border town all night long
just do n't do nothin' stupid and we 'll all get along fine
scotty you sure you do n't want a drink
okay i 'll have one
in that camper out there i saw a guitar
i take it that 's yours
yeah it 's mine
go out and bring it in
i feel a song coming on
you could take their head off
actually our best weapon against these satanic cocksuckers is this man
he 's a preacher
he 's right kate
daddy 's dead
he was too far away
if flinging that door and filling this room with those bat things would save him i 'd fling it
the only thing it 'll do is turn us into one of them
he needs our help
he 's beyond our help
you saw him get bit
i saw him get bit
we all saw it
you ca n't help him
i 've got no one left to lose but you
i ca n't be alone again
we 're sticking together
b.o.q. south side
take a starboard tack out the door
thank you ensign
no problem lieutenant
administration ensign blondell
do n't say my name
who 's
lieuten --
or rank
but can you do me a favor and pull a transfer order
okay but
you did n't have to do what you did
not for me
wickwire thomas dane
see what you can find
got it
who signed as his sponsoring officer
uh
do n't see it
there 's no signature
but hang on -- there 's a note to see addendum
checking
wow
what 'd you find kathy
commander are you of the habit of letting photographers traipse around your base snappin their fill
these were supposed to have been discreet test cases --
senator they stand out on the public highway with telephoto lenses --
-- and now i got reporters from toadsquat iowa calling my office and askin what i know about this g.i. jane thing
-- nothing i can do about it unless you 're suggesting i infringe on their civil liberties -- which i 'd happily do if you 'll just trim a little fat off the constitution
are you truly mouthin off to a senior member of the senate arms committee
i mean i 'll give you points for style -- just nothin' for smarts
well seein 's how this thing is out you let me handle the r.p.m
from this point forward i want all press matters coordinated via my office
i 'll be god damned if i 'm gon na watch hayes pull flowers out of his ass and take credit for this one
him or the president
this my shade
midnight mahogany
'cuz i 'm comin dangerously close to lookin like ronald reagan here
your prerogative senator
awright
how 's our girl doin' anyway
standing right here in my office
jordan dear
how are they treating you
uh v.i.p. security arrangements generally take some time senator
security
what the hell you talkin about
your base is n't secure
of course but there 's more --
then set out the good plates we 'll all have lunch
my office will follow up with details
jumping off now
yes of course
please have a seat lieutenant
thank you sir
would you care for a beverage
tea
i 'm fine sir
so
we 're still coming to terms with the exact protocol for this -- for integrating the spec recon training
it may not always be smooth but we 're trying to make it as painless as possible for you
thank you sir
but i expect a certain amount of pain
barber was my next stop sir
would 've had it regulation sooner only --
do n't worry about it
if it 's off your collar and out of your eyes that 's all i 'm going to ask
really i have no problem with --
i 'm not out to change your sex lieutenant
you 'll have separate beds separate heads
if you have specific medical needs inform the infirmary
if a classmate or superior acts in an harassing or otherwise unbecoming manner please inform me immediately so i can deal with it immediately
questions
none at this time sir
then that 's all i have to say
dismissed
all right lieutenant give me a name and specifics i 'll have the x.o. file an action first thing in the morning
a name
it 's you sir
and it started the day i came here
oh really
it 's this double standard the separate quarters the deferential treatment
it 's how you pulled out my chair and nearly served high tea the first time we met
because i was civil now you 're complaining
i ca n't afford civility sir
how am i supposed to fit in with these guys when you 've got me set up as an outsider
even if i make it under these rules i still lose because there 'll always be a flag in my file -- yeah she made it but
i mean really -- why did n't you just issue me a goddamn petticoat to wear around the base
did you just have a brain fart
pardon
did you just barge in here and curse at your base commander
if so i regard that as a bonafide brain- fart and i resent it when people fart inside my home
i think you 've resented me from the start sir
what i resent lieutenant is some politician using my base as a test tube for her grand social experiment
what i resent is the sensitivity training that is now mandatory for my men
the day care center i have to build where an officer 's lounge used to be
and the ob gyn i have to keep on staff just so someone can keep track of your personal pap smears
but most of all lieutenant i resent your perfume however subtle it may be competing with the aroma of my fine three dollar and fifty- nine cent cigar which i will happily put out this very instant if the phallic nature of it happens to offend your goddamn fragile sensibilities
does it
no sir
no sir what
the shape does n't bother me
it 's just that goddamn rotten stench
well
least now we 're talking the same language
so one standard
is that what you 're after
same rules for everyone sir
straight up
across the board sir
and if you just happen to wash out i wo n't have to contend with you bitchin to some hairy chested female senator
and please note i did not identify any one in particular
would n't dream of it sir
then good night
so i 'll get a fair shot
you 'll get everything you want o'neil
let 's see if you want what you 're gon na get
see me sir
you makin friends with the press lieutenant
sir i want you to know that i had nothing to do with any of this
not this article not --
we 'll all have lunch
good idea
oh and let 's be sure to invite this sociologist too -- just in case we want to have a fucking bridge game afterwards
permission to leave sir
permission to evaporate o'neil
i do n't know of any delicate way to say this lieutenant so i wo n't try
claims have been made that you have engaged in fraternization -- of the same sex variety
specifically that you were
seen leaving the apartment of another female officer at such a time and in such a manner as to suggest conduct unbecoming
sir if someone is suggesting that i 'm a lesbian they 're wrong
well if you had to go over my head lieutenant that 's the way to do it
christ nothin' like a 0 200 call from the commander and chief to get the bowels movin
sir
what did he say
basically -- he asked me if i could unring a bell
aw what is this
sir
ah c'mon
motherachrist
fine by me sir
no problem sir
newberry get a photo
south
entering my scan now
west
shit
think we 're had
smoke her
i ai n't gon na shoot her
only blanks
lemme do it
hey
ai n't your call man
banditos on the east perimeter
150 yards
shit she was part of it
fuck me
what we 're gon na pry 'em out with paddles
o'neil
our air 's gon na crap out as soon as we get down there
you know that do n't you
yes
did you hear
she made it through s.e.r.e. training
got a call this morning from --
not that
the white house just announced that it was sponsoring legislation that would in one stroke void all remaining elements of the 1948 combat exclusion laws
... last few years have brought many advances in the interests of women in naval service particularly in the land based maritime specialties
what 's more the navy has instituted special sensitivity courses with an eye on --
whoa whoa whoa
land based maritime specialties
gimme a second here to de euphemize that
hardly the case senator
well i 'm just an old dame without much time left so you 'll pardon me if i jump right in here before they discontinue my blood type
i am deeply concerned over the navy 's seemingly incontrovertible attitude toward women in the military
case in point
the lark report
madam senator
this is an internal document of the u.s. navy
i must seriously question whether --
the navy 's conclusion regarding the crash of an f-14 aboard an aircraft carrier
female aviator it just so happens
you 're familiar with this report and its conclusion am i right
i was one member of the investigating commission
yes i see your signature right here -- twice the size of everyone else 's
and your conclusion was pilot error hmm
i 'm really not prepared for any kind of in depth review of --
i 'd like to think our next secretary of the navy would be prepared for anything mr. hayes
the commission concluded that the aviator in question failed to execute a proper approach to the carrier
that aside for the moment i 'm struck by the tenor the ill spirit of your report
the degrading remarks by other aviators
innuendo about her performance in unrelated situations
even a reference to her sexual activity the weekend prior
in my seven years on this committee i 've never seen a downed aviator treated like this
never
i 'm deeply disturbed by this report mr. hayes
not just what it bodes for women in the military -- but for your own confirmation as well
so everyone i talk to says you 're top drawer with silk stockings inside
thank you ma'am
um may i ask what this is regarding
high school pentathlete
rotc scholarship graduated with honors
top marks in basic training
and as it just so happens a constituent of my home state of virginia
oh the things i 'll do for one extra vote
coronado
california
i know that sir
ma'am
it 's just that
beggin your pardon senator but
do you understand that this involves combat training
this is just a test case o'neil
but if it works out -- if you work out -- it could well change the navy 's official policy on women in combat
or actually its official non policy
now who 's your immediate superior there
captain dwyer
technically
my office will fill him in and help expedite
look forward to meeting you at the proper time
jumping off now
uh question ma'am
yes dear
would i be the only one
the only woman
there 'll be more to follow -- but yes dear right now you 're the pick of a very large litter
and your success would mean a lot
jumping now
ca n't complain ma'am
hmmm
maybe i 'll ask when i see you in person
uh ma'am
gon na be visiting that all woman 's america 's cup team in a few weeks -- if i were a gambler i 'd say dennis o'conner 's days are numbered
but they 're in san diego so i thought i 'd take a quick promenade of the base
wickwire was there to help
to be my eyes on the inside to make sure you were getting a fair shot
at least that was the intent
what changed
should probably ask him that
if i have to ask again senator i 'll be asking in front of cameras
so
is n't the president jumping on your bandwagon
what he did was light the bandwagon on fire
because he knows what i know -- that american families are not prepared to put their daughters in harm 's way
you do n't know that
in face i do roper harris gallop -- they all come back the same
what are you saying
that a women 's life is more valuable than a man 's
that a women 's death hurts a family more
i 'm saying it 's not going to happen
not when the president is set to turn this into a third rail issue should i choose to ever campaign against him
he will fry me six ways to sunday for sending daughters and young mothers off to war -- and quite possibly for bringing them back in body bags
you were never going to let women serve in combat
you always had a safety net
or thought you did
jordan
i do n't expect you to fully understand this -- but sometimes there 's more to be gained from the fight than the victory
so the rhetoric gets you headlines
but the reality gets you in trouble
the reality is this we send far too many men off to war
i do n't need to compound the problem with women
can you honestly tell me you wanted that life
squat pissing in some third world jungle with --
i wanted the choice
the chance to prove myself my skills my work me
that 's how it should 've been
i once promised you a fast ticket jordan and i always meant to make good on that
come work for me
i can always use a hard charger on my team
you promise wickwire a fast ticket too
i 've had no direct communication with him since this whole thing began
and that 's quite verifiable
i 'm sure it is
you 'll think about my offer
you know i wonder what the secnav would think about it
if i spoke with him
well i spoke with mr. hayes this morning myself -- and told him the deal was off
no more test cases
he was only too happy to oblige
do n't play politics with me little darlin
you 'd be up way past your bedtime
so she picks the women we pick the programs
seals
i 'd go special reconnaissance
every bit as tough -- and we have a 60 percent drop out rate among the men
then i suggest we start there
does n't matter who she picks
no woman is going to last one week in a commando training course
and i do n't care who it is
what the hell is the president trying to do
steal dehaven 's thunder
i think it 's more important sir to decide what we 're going to do -- since it 's apparent this issue is not going away quietly
g.i. jane
and which one of you told me she would n't last a week
huh
montgomery why do they call you flea
it 's really f. lee montgomery -- but that gets whittled down to just flea
for short ma'am
so it really has nothing to do with actual brain size
no ma'am
well flea i appreciate the respect you just showed me
but i do n't need it and do n't want it -- not that kind of respect anyway
it 's just gon na hurt us both okay
i 'll work on it ma'am
do that
hey
you okay flea
snot me
it 's him
six o'clock
marking marking
spotted you chief
pri one is to slip you some air so we 're coming down with a tank -- just something until the a team shows
over
do n't have to use it o'neil but it 's got ta go out
five
four
three
i can make this wall without --
... two
one
mark
just do it okay
if you ca n't feel the other guy 's pecker you ai n't in tight enough
i want nuts to butts
come on montgomery
flea
o'neil
why is there a break in that line
o'neil
sir
you 're wanted at the c.o. 's
time
check your watch pyro
seems fast
miller
thought the guy was made of depleted uranium
really did n't expect to lose him
every class has its surprises pyro
this one'll be no different
boat five -- wickwire cozad vinyl intagliata ayers and wise
lieutenant wickwire is your senior officer
follow his orders to your death
get it up
you do n't think she 'd be raped if she were captured
you do n't think the threat of rape would be used to leverage the men
you broke a dozen training rules back there -- before i lost count
i 've had it
just because they pay me like a baby sitter does n't mean i 'm gon na be one
she 's a trainee just like the others
why are you coming down so hard
she 's an officer
there 's a higher standard
she 's a women and that 's why you 're ridin her bareback
of course it is
and i 'm gon na stay on her until everyone realizes this is not some bullshit equal rights thing that real lives are gon na be lost
maybe mine maybe yours
i oughtta report you
i think you probably would -- if you did n't know i was right
the navy cross
i believe he earned it for saving a man 's life in saudi arabia
he wanted you to have it
he was very clear on that point
i was looking for him earlier but
the chief was granted early retirement as of 17-hundred yesterday
by 18-hundred he was gone
out of the navy
just a coincidence
maybe it 's not my place to speculate on his private thoughts
but i think the chief knew that his way -- his world -- had come and gone
lieutenant o'neil
got ta situation here
where are you
stuck in traffic
not due in for 22 minutes sir
watcha got
do we know it 's him using the beacon
not a decoy
signals received only sparingly in such a pattern that leads us to conclude it is a downed aviator trying to conserve his batteries
chances of recovery
you 're the analyst for east china o'neil
analyze
north korean beaches are the best protected most heavily monitored in the world
the civilian population is so propagandized that it acts as an early warning system
extraction team has to be small and silent -- i 'd go with seals over delta force
problem is do n't want to hold a conventional sub off shore for target practice
where 's the polk
halfway round the world
so that 's the problem -- we can get the team in just not out
unless you whiskey run
blank faces here o'neil
quick hit technique used by capone
rigged a getaway car with running boards and handles
all his guys had to do was jump on and take a ride
check the files -- dprk-57 -- i doped it out as a contingency plan seal team infiltrates picks up the package links up with recovery sub
but do n't waste time opening and closing hatches
they just grab the periscope and hang on for neutral waters
you expect the extraction team to ride the sub bare back
is that correct o'neil
only four minutes to neutral waters sir
why not
that was good headwork lieutenant
thank you sir
we hear back from the pentagon
probably hear back from cnn first
hate this part
just sweating it out on the sidelines
intel has its own glory lieutenant -- no matter how subtle
by the way i 'll need that option paper by 11-hundred today so i can review it with admiral hanover
and do we have any of that breakfast tea around here
is this my glory sir
so why 're you even considering it
are you
just like you would be
spec recon
those guys are world- class warriors
and they will not want you there jordan
i take it you do n't either
feet
i 've been trying you for five days
do n't they give you messages
it 's hard to find time to sleep royce
much less keep up with my phone life
how hard they making it on you
that bad
i feel like there 's men here there 's women here -- then there 's men
but hey what 'd i expect
well not this
i was doing the pentagon scene few nights ago
got some fresh stuff -- about you
you may be in a hostile camp
i think someone may be taking steps to ensure that you crash and burn
me
why me
do n't you know
how they 're talking about you
i saw an article
i ca n't walk two blocks in washington without hearing about g.i. jane
you 're all over the place and whether you wanted it or not the feminists are sizing you up for that poster
so why are you telling me this
big symbols make big targets jordan
i think someone 's gunning for you
you know royce i got enough heat on me without you turning up the jets too
i 'm only trying to warn you in case --
well let me warm you i 'm going though with this
the more everybody fucks with me fucks with my head the more it just makes me want to finish
so do n't expect me back crying in your arms any time soon okay
that 's not what i want jordan
i mean
it is and it is n't
still ca n't make up your mind huh
got ta go royce
jordan
you watch your ass
sure
i 'll join the crowd
all i wanted was an honest chance
and if i could n't get it i could n't stay
and this class officer
wickwire
you think he was just trying to get even
striking back for
maybe
though it did n't seem like he was getting any satisfaction out of it
almost like
did i say he was class officer
almost like someone put him up to it
okay who
no shortage of suspects
the chief
or maybe even turrentine
your c.o.
c'mon jordan
do the headwork with me
it 's done with royce
let it go
someone screwed you over like this left unanswered charges hanging over your head and you 're not gon na fight back
i 'm tired of fighting back
i just wanted to come home and be safe and have you here and the river there and just forget the rest of the world okay
well before you crawl off to die jordan give me five minutes of good headwork
john james urgayle
the chief
what about him
instructors typically pull three year assignments
this guy 's in and out in one year -- your year
that sound right
sounds like an amazing coincidence
or like maybe he was baby sitting a problem child for the navy
i do n't know i do n't care
well pardon me if i do
now who else
who could 've leveraged a class officer like that
c'mon jordan keep your head in the game
in washington
what
wickwire said he was dry docked in washington between stints at coronado
they 're more afraid of you
well now i feel so much better
it was made clear before you came -- harassment equals career suicide
ca n't say anything good so they do n't say much at all
to your face anyway
whose orders were those
it was made clear
anyway stay ballsy
first week 's hell then it levels out
until s.e.r.e. training anyway
that 's hell and a half
and how do you know that
made it to week 10 last time
i did n't know they let you try again
especially at your age
you 're kind of a surprise yourself
hey
way to gut it out
thanks wick
who is it
you know i had an apartment about this size once
wick
they got your crew too
intagliata was out chasing breakfast
they found his tracks
well shit
you really came back for more
of this
when i was sittin behind a desk in washington it made sense somehow
blame it on my big brother
he was spec recon
and the stories he used to tell
if you got a good one wick
one time he was doing a rekkie of the libyan coastline
this is like right before we bombed khadaffi into the past tense
so his crew does a nighttime infil maps all the big artillery placements and stuff then turns around to get the hell gone
but between them and the water are five libyan guards all armed to the nuts
they had to kill 'em
nah they were dead ass asleep
but on every guard 's chest they left one marlboro cigarette
just a little calling card to say they 'd been there -- and could come back any time they wanted
that 's a good story
so the shit you got ta go through
to get from here to there
brother said it was worth it
worth the training
worth the divorce
worth anything
he was married
at first
you got anybody wick
not me
you
o'neil
how 'd you make it last time wick
how 'd you get through this part
last time i did n't
let 's keep talkin wick
just keep talkin to me
sorry did n't mean to --
that 's okay
just an ex girlfriend
and know i remember why
first big night of liberty and no date
you 're pathetic wickwire
maybe i 'll just head over to mcp 's with the others have a drink or four
do n't wanna come do you
i ca n't go out
not like this
i think you look beautiful
thanks for lying
but you 're the class officer wick and it 'd just be weird if we hook up
besides
do you uh know
sure sure
we 're going over to her place to make salad and pasta
just you know nothing special
okay
well
thought i 'd ask
she part of the training
i do n't know
if not firing will only give away our position to hostiles in the area
now how smart is that
mighta been civilian
32 feet six inches
i 'm lookin i 'm lookin
cool
smoke it
so we got two full mini tanks three minutes each
cool
how much air in yours
maybe half
not even
grab an oar find a way to weight it down we 're gon na need it
cortez help him
flea
you take one of the two full minis -- and just follow my lead
say again sir
you heard me
move on
chief sir i do n't understand why --
educate her pyro
permission to get dressed sir
it seems the men could n't get used to the sight of women blown open and their viscera hanging from tree limbs
israeli men would linger over wounded females -- often to the detriment of the mission often endangering their own lives
they do n't use women anymore
sir someone mentioned you received the navy cross
may i ask what you got it for
for pulling a 210-pound man out of a burning barrack in saudi arabia
i see
so when a man tries to rescue another man he 's a hero
but when he tries to rescue a woman he 's gone soft
could you have pulled that 210-pound man clear lieutenant
simple question lieutenant
no reason not to answer
what is your father 's name
dad
any brothers
sisters
dick jane and spot
are you hungry
what 's your favorite food
we 'll try to get it for you
green eggs and ham
you 're not going to get anywhere
you might as well put me in the cage
you are in the cage o'neil
right here right now
should i be afraid
right down to your worthless womb and i 'll tell you why
this is my island
my world
and here i can get away with shit that would get me arrested anywhere else in the world
take another scan of my little joy- boy outside
if i can do that to a navy seal what 's gon na happen to you
huh
why did n't you shoot the woman o'neil
was n't deemed a threat
she led us right to you
that 's no threat
would you have shot if it was a man
no
yes
i mean depends on --
the others already told me o'neil
they wanted to shoot but you would n't let them
because you went soft on another women --
that 's not right
that 's what your crew said
are they lying
or are you
i think you 're the liar
i 'm not the one who got five good men thrown in a bamboo cage
you wear the bars you made the call and you got your whole crew --
we did n't know we were compromised
firing would only've given away our position
you think we should go easy on women o'neil
do you
no
i 'm so glad we agree
did n't you know you 'd be raped if you were captured
did n't you even think about that
sure
just like your men do
i think we oughtta practice it just so you know what to expect
well i 'm trying to figure out if you 're stupid unlucky gluttonous -- or some new alloy of all three
good to see you again too sir
okay o'neil
so you 've impressed all the others
now try me
managed to activate the elb
if you just radio base and let them know they 'll fix on that
oh and make sure they send a helo with a winch -- door 's blocked by a reef
over
chief sir -- rescue team wo n't be here for 15 minutes
what 's your air situation
over
say again
how many micks
15 sir
got it
show us where you are chief
anybody usin these drawers here
hey hey hey
no possibility
you ca n't stay in here
you ca n't sleep right next to me
funny the c.o. says i can
aw lookit this lookit this -- she 's bringin tampax in here
c'mon you got nothin' but rooms over there
that your desk
i 'll take this one
would you just get outta here
listen sex ape
i 'm here to stay
and if you do n't want me for a roommate or classmate you got two options -- move out or ring out
end of file
clear
north
all right fire and evade maneuvers
drop everything but weapons and the prc radio -- we 're gon na be high speed low drag all the way to the link up site
ready
sure
now she wants to shoot
move
i just wonder how that happened
cortez see if you can dig out the tools without losing the rest of out gear
try a wrench on that thing
you do n't suppose this is just part of
flea
keep your eyes on that spot
mark it mark it
cortez
what the hell you waiting for
maybe we should call the coast guard
shut your hole slutnik
we 're fucked
darth vader reads poetry
we are so fucked
this ai n't workin right
what 's our go to shit plan o'neil
this ai n't even workin wrong
subject
o'neil jordan
thought you two were file closed
you knew about us
sorry
thought you knew i knew
all right
so who stands to gain if jordan flames out in a big way
the e ringers
full integration is gon na cost the services billions at the worst possible time -- when congress is already swinging the axe
congress cuts military bleeds
but pentagon 's a big place
let 's narrow the sights
the navy
they 've made it clear they do n't want to pull missiles out of subs to make room for women 's heads
what 's it gon na cost to make a fleet of trident 's co ed
sabotage born of economics
would n't be a first
but is hayes really going to start his watch with such a public failure
possibly
just to spite dehaven
hmm
let 's aim higher
the white house
if jordan wins dehaven wins in spades
why
well it 's been said that the only man the president fears -- ai n't no man
the first female president
do n't for a second think she did n't leak this story
g.i. jane gives dehaven a symbol that taps into the biggest constituency of them all
women
if you were the president would n't that put a little piss in your shoes
i do n't know
seems
this ai n't about some little soldier girl sloggin her way through commando school
the implications go way beyond
christ i do n't want to see her take a fall
she thinks i do but
i take it this file is still open
even tough i do n't talk to her every day -- i still talk to her every day
know what i mean
okay so now work it from the other end
think about california -- and how things might be handled there
i do n't
what someone on base
a mole
this is what you get for brain- picking an old cia spook
but if i needed to control the outcome of this test case that 's how i 'd do it
a man in place
makes everything very controllable
that 's cuz i 'm married to you
shut up
how can you eat like that
big bites
i 'm telling you he 's dirt
he 's a douche bag gutter slime dog crap puke chunks
hey hey
i 'm eating here
audrey you 're too damned nice that 's your problem
nice gets you nothin' in this town
you got ta be a killer to get ahead you know what i 'm sayin
i 'm sorry baby but you just do n't got what it takes
audrey 's going to stay with us tonight
great
see ya then
who the hell are all these people
what
i just could n't just let them sleep in the street
where 's audrey
in the bedroom
crying her eyes out because of you
what
all that you got ta be vicious stuff you filled her head with
me
you where the one
go in there
talk to her
that why you dumped him
no
i just could n't see myself with some boring egg head who spends his summer picking apart cockroaches
i wanted to have some adventure some fun
how long where you and dis guy goin' steady
nearly four years
great stuff animal
were n't you scared
sure i was
i thought lucy was gon na kill me
he stole my report
that 's my report
we know audrey
you okay
it 's all my fault
what have i done animal
what have i become
look at me
this is n't me
i do n't do things like this
you made a mistake
yeah i just screwed up with the only man who ever really cared about me
did n't you tell me he left for the airport
yeah
why are you asking
i just saw him
he 's with a bunch of guys who want to sneak into the city tonight
my god
he 's going after the nest
perfect
you wanted a story well baby you got one
animal i ca n't
look you want to make it up to your friend
well if he 's right this is your chance
do n't you think we have enough
yes
definitely
definitely enough
think we can fit up in there
only one way to find out
he 's not going to do it
oh yes he will
cut uptown take 8th to 57th then cut up broadway
you 're crazy go to the east side and take the park avenue to the jfk
the jfk
in the rain
what are you talking about
the east side is always faster
but we can get to the west side faster
audrey did you take the tape out of the camera
no
i 'll take them all
you must have quite some harem
audrey
is that you
hi hello
you look wow uh how 've you been
it 's good to see you nick
so you still picking apart cockroaches
no i 'm into earthworms now
you would n't be interested
they 're real boring creatures
very reliable dependable no surprises
you 're still mad at me are n't you
you just left me without a phone call a letter nothing
all this time
yeah i guess i 'm still a little mad
that was eight years ago
some people change you know
most people do n't
i 'm sorry you feel that way
wait
i 'm sorry
you 're right
eight years is a long time
can i offer you a cup of tea
sure
i 'd like that
i still ca n't believe it
how does a guy go from an anti nuke activists to working for the nuclear regulatory commission
when you and i use to attend rallies in college we helped to create awareness
but from the inside now i can actually effect change
i never lost my idealism
and exactly what changes are you trying to effect
i have this theory that we 're inadvertently creating new species as a direct result of what we 've done to nature
and you think this creature is one of them
yes
the first of its kind
i found this blood sample earlier this evening
blood sample
how close did you get to that thing
i got pretty close
what else do you know about it
... he 's pregnant
are you sure
well obviously these tests were n't designed for this but fundamentally they 're looking for the same hormonal patterns that would indicate pregnancy
i do n't get it
if it 's the first of its kind how can it be pregnant
the ultimate expression of evolution it reproduces asexually
think about it all kinds of creatures have been known to travel great distances for reproduction
that 's why he came to new york
like every species of insufficient progenitors he 's nesting
nesting
yes
do you realize that a creature like this could lay as many as a dozen eggs at a time
is this cause of me
because of the story
well what the hell did you think was going to happen
you never said it was off the record
i should n't have to audrey
you 're supposed to be my friend
i trusted you
i did n't mean for it to turn out like this
look i lied to you
i 'm not a reporter
when we broke up and i came out to new york i was so sure i 'd make it
but i have n't
that 's why i needed this story so bad
i just could n't tell you i 'm a failure
so you thought that made it okay to steal my tapes
what are you doing here
i thought you said there 'd only be a dozen eggs
i was wrong
the network is on an intranet
it 's a direct feed into our computer system
your station wo n't have any easier time contacting the military than i did
if the military are listening they must immediately destroy this building before they can escape
oh my god
they 're coming
are you okay
somehow i never thought your life was this exciting
you 'd be surprised
really
i 'd like to find out
who was that french guy anyway
oh just some insurance guy
and i 'm supposed to remind you to call him on all of caiman 's expense p.o
's
speak of the devil
my life sucks
oh please your life does n't suck
his life sucks
i ca n't believe he put the moves on me
after everything i 've done for him
he 's scum
as far as he 's concerned you 're just a pair of breasts that talk
it 's nick
i know that guy
i know him
who is he
he was my college sweetie
look at him
he looks so handsome on t.v
what the hell is he doing in panama
what the hell are you doing
remember my friend we saw on t.v
your old sweetheart
yeah well he just turned up in new jersey at the military command post
somehow all this is related to what happened down in panama
there 's a story here
i know it
you got any tape or glue
i left my forgery kit back at the office
wish me luck
audrey i do n't think this is a very good idea
caiman finds out and he 'll have your job
i 'm tired of waiting for someone else to give me an opportunity luce
if there 's a story here i 'm going to find it
hey do you have any glue in your bag
what 's it to you
can i use some
what do i get
the warm feeling of helping your fellow man
five bucks
you 're kidding right
did you talk with humphries
this is not the place
just tell me did you talk with him
he said he 'd consider it
it 's between you and rodriguez
are you serious
he 's going to consider me for he job
what else did he say
mr. caiman you 're married
and you 're beautiful
mr. caiman
call me charlie
mr. caiman i 've been doing extra research for you after hours and weekends for nearly a year
and i 've never asked for anything but this job is really important to me
i 'm too old to be an assistant anymore
i need to know this job is going someplace
so have dinner with me tonight
i ca n't
it 's your choice
caiman wait
take me with you
what
i 've got something on this
i know a guy on the inside with the military
not now
you got my bag
you do n't understand i can get us information
listen this is the time when the big boys have to go to work okay honey
we did it
we 've got the exclusive
way to go audrey
we
i do n't think so
i want that story audrey
remember you work for me
not anymore
mr. caiman i quit
not for a long time now
well i think you 're cute
oh thank you
is she always like this
hence the radiation
more than that
i believe this is a mutated aberration a hybrid from the fall out in that region
evacuate manhattan
that 's over three million people
has that ever been done before
i do n't think so
i 'm sorry about all this
me too
make sure they find that nest before it 's too late
i 'll try
merde
allez allez
they will set the trap at thirty minutes to ten
that is when we will go in
we 've secured the doors on both levels
where 's luc and pierre
they did n't make it
nick my men and i will hold them here
you will have to go and get help
chargeures property and casualty insurance
we are preparing a report
you 're fast
that is our job
well your people are getting in the way of my job
major what do you think could have done this
get your people out of there or i will
dr. niko topopolosis
it 's tatopoulos
right
the worm guy
can someone get those people off the beach
excuse me would you mind telling me what the hell i 'm doing here
follow me
you did n't answer my question
in fact for the last 18 hours no one has answered any of my questions
we have a situation on our hands that requires your particular expertise
look i may work for the nuclear regulatory commission but accidents and spills are not my field
we know
do you know that you just interrupted a three year study of the chernobyl earthworm
yeah you 're the worm guy
the radioactive contamination in that area altered the earthworm 's dna
you have any idea what that means
no but i have the feeling i 'm about to find out
it means that due to a man made accident the chernobyl earthworms are now over seventeen percent larger than they were before
mutated by seventeen percent
seventeen percent huh
sounds big
they 're enormous
a new species created by man 's recklessness
that 's what i 've been trying to tell you i 'm only a biologist
i take radioactive samples and study them
then you 're perfect
here 's your radioactive sample
study it
what sample
you 're standing on it
that was a footprint
i was standing inside a footprint
that 's right
but there 's no animal in the world that can make prints like that
is there
we 're hoping you 're going to help us figure that out
you know he 's not an enemy trying to evade you
he 's just an animal
what are you suggesting
when i needed to catch earthworms i knew the best way to catch them was not to chase them
i had to draw them out
well yes
i did
clearly he was injured and bled
you see all we need to do is get a better shot at it with weapons that do n't rely on heat seeking
um excuse me sir but the situation 's more complicated than that
the blood i recovered revealed that the creature is either about to lay eggs or already has
no it reproduces asexually
that 's why we must find the nest
if we do n't dozens will be born each one capable of laying eggs of its own
very quickly we could be looking at an enormous population
so after we kill the creature we 'll begin a search for the nest
it may be too late by then
these eggs will hatch very quickly
you gave them the tape
no it 's still in my tent
it's
oh my god she took it
we think there 's a strong reason to believe it may be hiding inside one of the buildings within the sequestered area
but you do n't know for sure
general anderson the problem was the terrain
if we lure him out into a more open area such as this portion of central park
we should be able to take him down
last time you did n't even scratch it
that 's not true
our worm guy er i mean dr. tatopoulos found blood
do you have any idea what 's going on out there
the phones are ringing off the hook with people screaming to be let back into the city
we 're sending divers into the river now to retrieve the body
that thing 's dead
what the hell are we waiting for
organize a search party
i want a complete sweep of the entire city and subway system
you do n't have the authority to do that
sdece service de documentation exterieure et de contre espionnage
agent phillip raymond
sounds like a big company
it 's the french secret service
oh
we have learned that your american friends have decided not to look for the creature 's nest
are you sure
how do you know
we know
why are you telling this to me
i need you to trust me
why do you need that
i need your trust if you 're to help me find the nest
oh my bags
i 've checked them in
we have already taken care of them
how did you get all of this stuff into the country
this is america
there is nothing you can not buy
so why all the secrecy
why are n't you guys working with the us military
i am not permitted to speak of such things
i am a patriot
i love my country
can you understand that
sure
it is my job to protect my country
sometimes i must even protect it from itself
from mistakes we have made
mistakes that we do not want the world to know about
your talking about the nuclear testing in the pacific
yes
this testing done by my country left a terrible mess
we are here to clean it up
here
23rd street subway station
where we first found the fish
with a little luck this will lead us right to it
so you 're in
are you kidding
i always wanted to join the french foreign legion
what 's with the chewing gum
makes us look more american
they 've turned off the ventilation system
they 're calling him to dinner
let 's hope we are not the hors d'oeuvres
three eggs
i thought there would be more
you were right
what 'd they say
i ca n't get through
i do n't know what 's wrong
who the hell are you
it 's okay
i know her
hello
it 's raymond
where are you
i understand
i just wanted to say au revoir and thank you for your help my friend
wait
au revoir
dr. lazarus
i hope that i 'm not breaching protocol but
i am so very humbled to stand in your presence
i have studied your missions extensively
though i am thermian i have lived my life by your philosophy by the code of the mak'tar
well good that 's very
nice
by grabthar 's hammer dr. lazarus i-
do n't do that
i 'm not kidding
i 'm sorry sir i was only-
just do n't
... yes sir
your quarters sir
this is it
yes sir
marvelous is n't it
completely distractionless
where 's my bed
just as on your home planet sir
if i may say it took me three years to master the spikes but now i sleep with a peace i never thought possible
is that the bathroom
yes sir
the use of your waste facilities were strangely absent from the historical records so we had to extrapolate purely on the basis of your anatomy
dr. lazarus here is your surface mapper
i have programed it to the coordinates of a beryllium sphere of sufficient density
thanks
good luck on your mission sir
by grabthar 's hammer by the suns of warvan i wish you-
uh uh
what did we talk about
right
sorry sir
okay quellek let 's get back to the command deck and suddenly we hear a pistol blast and quellek 's chest turns red
alexander and quellek look down at the blood horrified
i 'm
i 'm shot
not so bad
we 'll get you to medical quarters
you 're going to be fine
i
i do n't think i 'm going to make it sir
no do n't talk like that son
we 're going to get you fixed up
... it has been my greatest honor to serve with you
living by your example these years my life has had meaning
i have been blessed
sir i
i
do n't speak quellek
you 'll forgive my impertinence sir but even though we had never before met always considered you as a father to me
come on old friend
friend
you stole all my best lines
you cut me out of episode two entirely
you will go out there
i wo n't and nothing you say-
the show must go on
... damn you
damn you
i 'm glad you asked
to me the most important qualities of a galaxy explorer are loyalty
... to camera center no matter whose shot you 're blocking
leadership
god what an ass
come in protector
protector
calm down everybody
we 're just here to negotiate general sarris surrender
just
no
we're almost through
don't be insane stop
full stop
keep going
keep going
about this much
what 's the scale
is that ten miles
a hundred miles
this much
there it is
the beryllium sphere
must be some sort of mining facility
go ahead
you go first
there 's no time
oh of course i forgot
you have to be the hero do n't you
heaven forbid anyone else get the spotlight once
oh no jason nesmith could n't possibly-
what
what
nothing
i heard something
a squeal
fred 's no good jason
you 're going to have to kill it
kill it
well i 'm open to ideas
alexander
please
you 're my advisor advise me
...
well you have to figure out what it wants
what 's its motivation
it 's a damn rock monster
it does n't have motivation
that 's your problem
you were never serious about the caraft
i 'm a rock
i just want to be a rock
still
peaceful
tranquil
oh but what 's this
something 's making noise
no not noise no
movement
vibrations
make the vibrations stop they go straight into me like a knife
i must crush the thing that makes the vibrations
am i crazy or do you actually have something there
hundreds dead all so you could play at being the commander
you 've murdered us all you egomaniacal sonofabitch
shut up
just shut up you purple skinned monstronsity
jason before we entered the black hole my instruments detected strange energy surge from sarris shid~ similar to
no time to worry about that alex
tommy let 's get this thing slowed down
gwen see if you can calculate the impact point
guy cet down to deck c and make sure tne injured are secured
also lets-
he 's a twit
oh and did you hear he booked another fan appearance without us
not again
i played richard iii
settle down alex
no
i ca n't go out there
i wo n't say that ridiculous catch phrase one more time
i wo n't
i ca n't
what the hell is going on
jason what have you gotten us into
he wants to think
no jason that 's a wrap
there 's nothing to think about
could you possibly try not to hit every single one
they 're drifting toward me
i think they 're magnetic
what 's happened
the engines are dead
we 're drifting
this is ludicrous
why are you listening to this man
must i remind you that he is wearing a costume not a uniform
he 's no more equipped to lead us than this fellow
no offense
you have a better plan alex
as a matter of fact i do
look at their eyes
they 're obviously nocturnal
come sundown they will go into the forest to hunt
so our plan is simply to wait for nightfall instead of mounting an insane assault in full daylight simply because we did it that way in episode 31
he 's a miserable twit
the guy is terminally selfish
oh alex get away from that thing
dear god
how did i come to this
alex you ca n't -just leave
oh ca n't i
watch me
oh good there 's nothing to eat
why did n't you stop at the market
i still have n't got this bloody thing off
you could order something in
a boy comes to the door
i do n't know
it just was n't like him
yes poor jason
as we speak he 's probably out somewhere talking rubbish to a roomful of hangers on
while here i sit eating christmas cheese in spring
oh my god it 's real
all this from watching the
historical records
we heard it the first time
shit
i 'm doing it
i 'm repeating the damn computer
may i get the check
the ships are gaining
look at that
will you look at that
they look like little children
could they be the miners
i do n't know
nobody was watching
those blue things ate everybody here
it does n't make sense
surely they could have fortified the compound against those creatures
he knocked me out the sonofabitch
where is he
down there
you said the commander
what
back there
you said the commander is down there with a bunch of cannibals
no i did n't
yes you did
he always has to make the big entrance
by grabthar 's hammer this is true
159 nt
living room somewhere night 159
he dissed us again brandon
he probably
has some very important business to attend to
hi brandon
no time for pleasantries kyle
we have a level five emergency
the commander needs us to get him to the core and shut it down before it overloads
oh
okay
you 've got the utility systems walkthrough right
i have sectors 1 28
i think hector has the upper levels
we 'd better get everybody online
and kyle stop downloading porn
your frame rate is unacceptable
... yes
we accidently traded vox units when we bumped into each other on saturday
oh
oh i see
oh
what 's your name son
brandon
brandon i remember you from the convention right
you had a lot of little technical observations about the ship and i spoke sharply to you
yes i know and i want you to know i thought about what you said
i know you meant it constructively but
it 's okay
listen-
... but i want you to know that i am not a complete braincase okay
i understand completely that it 's just a tv show
there is no ship there is no beryllium sphere no diagital conveyor
i mean obviously it 's all just a-
it 's real brandon
all of it it 's real
i knew it
i knew it
brandon
the crew and i are in trouble and we need your help
okay we got it
okay you can go on in
i 'm going to get kyle
he knows the utility tunnel system better than anybody alive
okay now left at the next turn
past the oxygen units
make a right there
then go through the antimatter vent
okay
okay now what
now make a right you 'll see a doorway that opens on the central manufacturing facility
the bowels of the ship
commander do you have a camera
i 'd die to see this in person
all they showed on t v was a machine here and a wall here
i do n't know why they did n't show the whole thing
we 'd never have the budget for this
okay so do you see a door marked core unit
should be down at the far end to your left
yes
okay that 's where you want to be
brandon
just in case i die there 's something i have to know
yes commander
what does the omega 13 do
well that 's the big question is n't it
what do you mean
it 's been the subject of an extremely heated debate on the internet for years
many believe that is a matter collapser a bomb capable of destroying all matter in the universe in a chain reaction lasting 13 seconds
but you do n't
no i am of the firm belief that in reality it is not a matter killer but a matter rearranger converting all molecules to the exact state they existed thirteen seconds previous to activation thus effecting a thirteen second time jump to the past
how did you come to that conclusion
my cousin 's boyfriend 's sister went out with the screenwriter
his favorite movie is the omegaman
he 's seen it 13 times
brandon
time to go
yes commander
all right you 're almost there
just go through the chompers and over the pit
commander you and lt
madison will have to go through the crushers one at a time in three second intervals
tell me when the first crusher hits the bottom
okay now
but-
wait two seconds then go
i 'm at the control oaneh
what do i do
raise the glass and push the blue button
that 's it
yeah
what 's wrong
jason ~~othino
i -ust oncuont ot wou o oc oomooooateo onan onat
structural damage at 68 percent
we 're getting major structural damage
i just ca n't believe it
any of it
look at this room
they designed it based on the tuaran pleasure ship from historical document thirty seven
oh and wait wait listen to this
computer
yes
what 's the weather like outside
there is no weather in space
i never get tired of that joke
the ship is sustaining structural damage
guys we 're sustaining structural damage
the enemy is matching velocity
the enemy is matching velocity
computer what about our engines
why do n't we have power
the beryllium sphere has fractured under stress
it 's fractured
negative
the beryllium sphere will have to be replaced
we need another one
negative no reserve beryllium sphere exists onboard
no we do n't have an extra beryllium sphere
u
what do you think
that possibly
the valence bonds have shifted bi laterally
... what does that mean
what does that mean
yes i see
yes
it means that perhaps
the
bonding molecules have become covalent
covalent
right
so
so our solution is to introduce a bonding substrate
a two molecule compound sharing a free electron and bombard the ions with their reflective isotopes
ok
hey commander
listen we found some beryllium on a nearby planet
we might be able to get there if we re configure the solar matrix in parallel for endothermic propulsion
what do you think
i
well uh
yes absolutely
a hologram
never mind fred
no no
i 'll think on it
the digital conveyer
you mean i 'm going to get diced into cubes and sorted up there in a thousand pieces
right
i 'll take my chances with gorignak
no i 'll kill you
listen fred
you did this for four years on the show
you can do it now
put your hands on the controls
fred i worked summer stock with hopkins
regional theater with hoffman
but i swear to god i have never met an actor who could hit his mark or nail his lines with the professional consistency of a freddy kwan
you 're mr. dependable
you can do this
you worked with hopkins
i worship hopkins
as good as hopkins
hopkins ca n't drink your bathwater fred
how do you remember this stuff
oh i make it up
use lots of k"s and v"s
we 've got to get that valve turned off
their oxygen is almost gone
listen i 'll go in create a distraction
have this
may be able to hold them back long enough for the aliens to escape
it 's suicide
i 'm just a glorified extra fred
i 'm a dead man anyway
if i 'm going to die i 'd rather go out a hero than a coward
maybe you 're the plucky comic relief you ever think of that
listen i was wondering would you guys mind if i sit in today
see if anybody 's interested in an autograph
never know
sure guy if you can stand the excitement
crewman 6
call me guy
you
know us
that 's why you built this ship
it 's
incredible
the omega 13
why does that sound so familiar
the lost footage
at the convention
the mysterious device in our last episo -- historical document
guy you have a last name
we just do n't know it
do i
do i
for all you know i 'm just crewman 6
okay it 's fleegman
guy fleegman
there
now i 'm a whole person
i ca n't die
fleegman
they can't kill me now can they
can they
where are the miners
something bad happened here
oh they 're so cute
of course they 're cute now
but in a second they 're going to turn mean and ugly somehow and then there are going to be a million more of them
... okay
all right
put me back on with him
they 're still behind us
we should have a turbo
i 'm always saying activate turbo boosters right
guy you 're not going to get killed on the planet okay
oh i 'm not
i 'm not
then what 's my last name
your last name
yeah what is it
it 's
i do n't know
no
nobody does
do you know why
because my character is n't important enough for a last name
because i 'm going to die five minutes in why bother to come up with a last name for me
we 're screwed
we 're so screwed
all right let 's all settle down
if we 're going to get through this we 're going to have to exercise self control
that 's it that 's what 's going to kill me
let 's just pick up the pace a little shall we
it does n't have to be a hologram
just a diversion
jason are we doing episode 31 or not
it 's a rough plan guy
what does it matter if we 're doing episode 31 or not
because i died in episode 31
i know
you contruct a weapon
look around can you form some sort of rudimentary lathe
a lathe
get off the line guy
we re oetting hammered jason
return fire
no
keep all energy to the armor
assault on voltareck iii
episode
31 i think
we 're doing episode 31
whatever the one with the hologram
the wall of fire
they 're gone
where 'd they go
back inside
you have no idea what a perimeter is do you
not a clue
you
i think he just likes pointing at things
we 're alive
we made it
commander we made it
m alexander sort ov by grabtnar s h mmer we ove to te ono tale
~e're alive
we made it
commander we made it
a few fans built a little set in their garage
i come in for an hour at most
it 's a nothing
how much of a nothing
not enough to split five ways kind of a nothing
what do you want me to say gwen
they wanted the commander
what
you smiled at me
this is n't mine
wait where is that kid
you know it 's one thing to treat us this way but how can you do this to your fans
wait
when are you going to tell them
tell them
about
who we are
do n't you think they 're going to be pissed
are you kidding
i 'm not going to tell them
well you have to tell them
what if something happens
we 're actors not astronauts
we ca n't do this stuff
it 's not the stuff
i mean anybody can learn the stuff
the important thing is commitmnt
99 of anything is just committing to it
ninty nine percent of acting is commitment
acting
stella adler never manned a resonance cannon she taught acting
hey
hey where are you going
we have no right to do this
they deserve to know
gwen
gwen c'mon wait no
we 're leaving jason
we 're leaving now
let me think
i need time to think
there 's nobody here
jason
mathesar maybe we should get some of your crew up here
all right now nobody panic i 've dealt with this guy before and believe me he 's as stupid as he is ugly
jason
we 're going to fire everything we 've got at him all right
jason
you just keep pushing those buttons those there send everything at him okay
i made the cut the line gesture
you nodded okay
i thought it was the we 're dead gesture
i was agreeing
like i know where the hold button is
listen sarris you ca n't blame me for trying
maybe we can lose them in that cloud
i do n't think that 's a cloud
are they behind us
no i do n't think so
wait
they 're not but
something is
oh my god
self control
that 's funny coming from the guy that slept with every moon princess and terrakian slave girl on the show
did it ever occur to you that if you had been a little more supportive you could have held on to me
i could have held on to you
you 're playing your good side
do n't be ridiculous
all right
here 's the plan first fred we need a diversion to clear those things out of the compound then gwen alex fred and i go down to get the sphere
any of those things come back give a signal
guy you set up a perimeter
why does this sound so familiar
how does the rolling help actually
it helps
clenched jaw
will you stop riding me
jason
can you hear me
yes
yes i 'm here
thank god
are you okay
yeah
but i 've got gorignak staring me in the face
i think i can take it though
jason we 're going to use the digital conveyer to get you out of there
what
what did he say
nothing
hold please
so
we get to shut down the neutron reactor
right
uh
i hate to break it to you jason but i do n't know how to shut down a neutron reactor and unless you took a learning annex course i do n't know about i 'm pretty sure you do n't know how to shut down a neutron reactor either
no i do n't
but i know somebody who does
there 's no hatch
there 's no hatch
wait
jason here
what is that thing
it serves no useful purpose to have a bunch of choppy crushy things in the middle of a catwalk
gwen
we should n't have to do this
it makes no logical sense
why is it here
because it was on the show
well forget it
i 'm not going
this episode was badly written
he 's accelerating to mark 6
mark 12
never doubted you for a second
tommy 270 degree turn to port
where the hell is he
an hour and a half late
an hour and a half
this is great
they 're going to start eating each other out there
you 're kidding
when for
tomorrow morning before the store opening
unbelievable
you are so full of shit
you should have let me hit him
i do n't know guys
i mean he almost looked
sincere
i know it 's bizarre
you know that 's really getting annoying
i have one job on this lousy ship
it 's stupid but i 'm going to do it
got it
sure no problem
oh my god
tommy
stop the pod
stop the pod
i ca n't
it 's on autopilot
we got the sphere but the commander 's down there with a bunch of cannibals
teb reset the pod we 're going back
that thing 's not going to get us down there fast enough
face it he 's dead
wait fred what about your thing you know
digitize me sergeant chen
i heard it too
is this really the most important thing we could be talking about right now
jason you think you could get any closer to those mines
closer
i can try
what are you doing
what are thev doino
~7c int
sarris ship h37c
tommy look
those lights
i see them
i see them
rd street pasadena 57
first i require the omega 13
second-
okey dokey let 's fire blue particle cannons full
fire red particle cannons full
fire gannet magnets left and right
fire pulse catapults from all chutes
and throw this thing at him too killer
yes
then tell me one thing
what does it do the device
the omega 13
i do n't know
is it a bomb
a booby trap
tell me
stop please
i do n't know
prepare a tear harness for the female
no
i swear i do n't know
please
do you think i 'm a fool
that the commander does not know every bolt every weld of his ship
wait
what did you say
please do n't hurt them it 's not their fault
i 'm not the commander i do n't know anything
explain
gwen
the show
there 's no choice
do it
my name is jason nesmith
i 'm an actor
we 're all actors
our dimwitted friends do n't understand the concept of acting
they have no theater no imagination these scientists
we pretend
simpler
we
we lie
yes
you understand that do n't you mathesar
accelerate to mark 4 tommy
this is embarrassing really
i sha n't tell this story when i return home
commander i must speak to you
it is a matter of supreme importance
we are thermians from the klatu nebula and we require your help
i beseech you to come with us back to our ship
a great many lives hang in the balance
right if this is about the thing tomorrow you can hammer out the details with my agent but make sure i have a limo from my house they jammed me into a toyota the last time i did one of these
i
certainly but-
catch me later okay
sir i understand this is a terrible breach of protocol but please i beg you to hear our plea
we are thermians from the klatu nebula
our people are being systematically hunted and slaughtered by roth'h'ar sarris of fatu krey
sarris wants the omega 13
we are to meet in negotiation
however our past efforts in this regard have been nothing short of disastrous
the flames the death
please captain you are our last hope
we have secured a limousine
oh right
the thing with the thing
come on in i 'll get some pants on
but commander
the negotiation
you
you
you fired on him
right
long live
what 's your planet
theramin
long live theramini
take a left here
but what if sarris survives
oh i do n't think so
i gave him both barrels
he has a very powerful ship
perhaps you would like to wait to see the results of-
i would but i am really running late and the 134 's a parking lot after 2:00
but listen the guy gives you any more trouble just give a call
an interstellar vox
thanks
how can we thank you commander
you- you have saved our people
it was a lot of fun
you kids are great
weapons storage
it 's perfectly safe
i promise
... maintenance facility
to our brave guests
few in this universe have the opportunity to meet their heroes
we are blessed to count ourselves among them
wherever a distress signal sounds among the stars we 'll be there this fine ship this fine crew
never give up never surrender
mathesar
has sarris seen the
historical records
no thank god he has not
then how did he find out about the device
our former commander was not
strong
former commander
i 'm sorry
you deserve to be shown
commander
mathesar i need you to prepare pods for my crew
mathesar
what is that
it 's the tothian mine field left standing from the great war of 12185
i 'm not a commander there is no national space exploration administration
there is no snip
but there it is
a model only as big as this
but
inside i have seen-
sections of rooms made of plywood
our beryllium sphere was painted wire and plaster
the digital conveyor was christmas lights
decorations
it 's all a fake
i 'm not him
i 'm a nothing
a nobody
but
why
it 's difficult to
on our planet we pretend in order to
entertain
the ship is a model
as big as this
a very clever deception indeed
he oan't oontaln his lauchter
a belle-----tommy set a course for home lommander
you can oc that
you said we do appearances together or not at all
i did n't say that
i said would n't it be great if we could always work together
that 's what i said
... to make sure craft service keeps those little butter cookies and plenty of them-
and determination
that 's right
just keep shaking it out
here have some gum it helps
wh
where are we
twenty third quadrant of gamma sector
i can show you on a map
what 's going on
i think we 're going to exit the space port
excuse me
they designed the ship from watching you
so
take her out lieutenant
well it 's
this was a device we
discovered on an alien planet
we do n't know what it does either
why do n't you just turn it on and see
could be this
push it
hold it down
do your best tommy
oh god
all right gwen alex fred follow me
guy set up the perimeter
tommy you keep a lookout make a signal if they come back
what kind of signal
anything
okay i 'll do this
caw caw
tommy we have these
oh right sorry
okay let 's go
sorry guys
it just went off
good work tommy
let 's go
okay
on what
how about the pig lizard
hey i was doing okay with the pig lizard
go for the eyes
like in episode 22 with-
it does n't have eyes
the throat the mouth
its vulnerable spots
it 's a rock
it does n't have vulnerable spots
no no no
we 've got to get out of here
c'mon hurry
let 's do it tommy
commander
call me laredo
mark 20 into the black hole areao
hold course laredo
i 'm trying commander
everything 's a blur but as long as i stay locked to that vox signal
continue forward sir
patience lt
patience
lieutenant lathe i confess i am beginning to feel a bit foolish myself
chasing across the universe to obtain what is i am now certain a bauble of fiction
tell me how best to obliterate this vessel
i would like nothing to remain
the core could be hardwired to overload without much effort
find them
but sir my men
the core implosion is not reversible
find them
enerao i 've host them
the maanetlsm o the field is disrupting our onstru- ~ait
there they are
get oack on their tail
what
wh
because they 're coming right at us
fire at will
hi d nt
protector
some say that hessians are invincible
they always say that
i 'm accused of using some government wagons to ship personal property
congress has been using our supply wagons for years to ship their black market goods -- probably their whores
we 've got to attack the british
now
have they put you in charge yet
do we have an army yet
what is happening
patience colonel arnold
active personalities terrify these men
but congratulations on your victory at ticonderoga
i capture quebec leading an army by river fordings through maine
if we do n't do it the british will come down champlain take back ticonderoga and attack us in the spring
you 'd have to travel hundreds of miles through the wilderness
over three hundred miles
you seem pleased by the prospect
exceedingly
besides if i had half the wagons that were used to lug the rum to philadelphia for this congress i could move a whole army to the moon
what 's your frank estimation of the british
well you fought with them against the french and iroquois how good were they then
they died well
otherwise they did n't do much right
but if we have war the british will surely send their best troops right now they have no other enemies
and a french alliance
ben franklin 's going to paris but i think the french will be long on talk and short on guns
our troops are mobs they wo n't take orders have no equipment
could they beat the british
it comes down to leaders
if our leaders are ordinary men who truly believe if they go into the forests with the troops eat what they eat fight with them perhaps to die
the most common soldier will defy your most depressing expectation
arnold
i 've come to report that we 've had a bit of luck
damn it
you 've given us a whole new season benedict
and congress thinks that the british are going to ride right over us come spring
now half their army is back in canada
congress has picked up it 's skirts and is racing for baltimore
they 're not waiting for spring
of course they still had time to deny my promotion
even john adams voted against it
why in hell would john do that
why in hell would any of them do that
after all you 've done it 's unbelievable
oh they have reasons
there 's a lot of confusion these days
they do n't trust me that 's the truth is n't it
sam adams never did
but trust you to do what
one side in congress wants compromise another glorious battle some surrender -- some of course just want power and money
but if you do n't mind my asking george what are your plans
we 're in bad shape benedict moral is low
before i can do anything i need lee and his seven thousand troops
i 've ordered him to join us three times
in my last letter i all but begged him to come here
the man is insubordinate
the man 's waiting for you to get wiped off the stage so he can become commander and chief
go on
i want to hear everything
congress is talking -- openly -- about replacing you with lee
is that a fact
it is
after visiting congress i know what it 's like being violated by come disproportionate asses
ah if she only knew that the most important men in the country -- possibly the world -- are sitting at this table
we 're so damned important
look at us -- nathanael you were a horse- shoer benedict before this
well truth be told
i was a pharmacist
alexander
well george who were you
i
you all know my history
our plan is to hit them as they leave
while they 're strung out
exactly
we 'd attack the baggage wagons and the rear guard
it would cause the line to buckle
then we hit the center with our main force and cut them in half
they 're ready
believe me the ones that stayed on here at valley forge are ready for anything
of course we get nothing from congress
they need boots coats
we desperately need food
same old story
there was this anonymous pamphlet circulated at congress which says i am personally responsible for all our hardships
and
that i have encouraged the people of america to make me into a god
benedict it says that i have gone mad
that ca n't be
there 's this whispering campaign against me ever since gates won at saratoga
gates
he used my battle plan and i humbly submit that without me he 'd still be back at saratoga waiting for the british to attack
george why have n't you moved into the potts house back at the creek
much more befitting of a commander and chief than your field tent
and
you could entertain
i think you need to entertain more
seriously
get a few new jersey whores up here invite some congressmen
could n't hurt
as soon as the men have good shelters i 'll move
perhaps martha will join me this winter
there then you can have sort of a normal life
have you heard
the british are negotiating to make a trade for general lee
i 'm sure his dogs will be overjoyed
the point being he 's also a candidate for my job
if we can pull this off maybe i can restore their faith in me
that scum joseph reed
they 're calling him the king of pennsylvania
the man 's a budding cromwell
he condemns rich tories to death and then appropriates their property for himself
naturally the pig hates me for every tory i 've saved
could n't you have appealed to congress
they love reed and his inquisition
i think they hope to share in his disgusting profits
it 's becoming the american way
you go too far benedict
you you just need a new flint general
you are never never to touch my guns
do you understand
yes general
but if you have to shoot somebody you ca n't
none of the servants is to touch a gun
you know that
well
i misunderstood then
misunderstood what
a lot of years have gone by
what
what are you talking about
that you would have known you can trust me
me
you apologizing to me
yes william
i am apologizing
wil
yes general
you 've served me loyally year after year without complaining
i 've thought hard about you this past winter
i want to free you wil
i want to give you your freedom after this battle is fought
yes general
wil i 'm giving you your freedom
do you understand
no
i guess
you 'd have money every year so you would n't have to work
you can stay at mount vernon as long as you want
wil i want to remind you of a conversation we started just before monmouth
i ai n't forgot about the freedom
well what have you thought
well general i think i ai n't got no school learning i ai n't got no trade
and i 'm a drunk
so i think there ai n't much left to be set free
no uniforms
no coats even
in this weather
no my lord
what sort of boots would you say he 's wearing
i should say no sort of boots at all
are n't those rags wrapped around his feet
is that what he marched here in
yes my lord
and is that a pitchfork beside him
many of them many did not possess proper arms
my lord
negroes
washington has black men in his army
are they good fighters
what 's that red ribbon on his arm colonel
because they have hardly any uniforms they designate officers with colored ribbons
my lord
by red what rank would you say this black officer soldier is colonel
i do n't know what color is what officer my lord
what the goddamned hell do you think you are doing
the british
these men can not stand against them
what do you know about these men
they can stand against anything
they 've seen more war than most field generals
they are not cowards sir
they are not afraid
who is that
that 's greene
he 's supporting our reconsolidation
marquis
get these men reformed send steuben and wayne out on the left
captain alexander hamilton sir
hamilton you 're going to have to cover our asses as we cross
we 've got powder but no ball
then use rocks
how old are you captain
i 'll be twenty next year sir
i 'll expect you for dinner this evening captain hamilton
for christ 's sake have a bath
delighted sir
excuse me general but may i ask how do you feel
no one wants to turn the table on the enemy more than i. but if victory is remote and there 's any hope for a negotiated peace we must keep this army intact
therefore retreat
i 'm so inclined
well sir then is it possible you called us all here just to hear what you wanted to hear
general washington is there actually going to be a compromise i mean a deal with england
and is that the most horrible thing in the world
captain i want you to know that i respect your openness
it would make me happy if you 'd join our table for dinner from now on
with pleasure
and an honor
did you hear about nathan hale
that young school teacher
i heard the british hung him as a spy
but it 's what he said just before they killed him i regret that i have but one life to give to my country
are you going to keep him sir
we better congress invented him
it 's impossible to stop these men deserting in winter you might as well stop geese from migrating
they go back home to keep their families alive stay into the spring to plant
then they start coming back to us
what are we going to do
get the body of our army up to greene 's vanguard as fast as we can
all the damned fool has to do is hit the british rearguard and then hold for us
general greene is here
there are two other divisions here
colonel hamilton
anyone who served under arnold i want them shipped north
i do n't want any troops here who served under arnold
yessir
did you know that arnold left the entire defenses of this fort in complete disrepair
most of our cannons are so neglected they may as well have been spiked
you realize what would happen if this fort fell
the whole hudson would be open to them
sir i think no such thing
do n't lie to me hamilton
if i had not court martialed arnold
sir arnold is a traitor
i must tell you sir you treat me with disrespect
i am not conscious of it sir
but since you have thought it necessary to tell me so we part
what is this
congress has informed the army that it is bankrupt and can not pay the soldiers pensions
this is a declaration of insurrection
who wrote this
no one knows
i want to address the officers all the officers
next friday
can we arrange it at the mess
yes i believe so
well if it 's my last order then i order them to be there
tell them i will give them my decision then
have you decided if you are going to join the virginia delegation to the constitutional convention
i 'm not sure
george you 're the only man the people trust
trust with power
they know you wo n't betray them
but it 's more than just that am i right
that 's why the people trust you george
without someone at the convention who has the people behind him everything will fail
will you do it
you 're asking me to be president of a republic not king
not a dictator over subjects
horatio
horatio gates of course you know john adams of the massachusetts delegation
good day mister adams
george what 's the word from boston
the last i heard a bunch of drunken militia have dug in on breed 's hill
with one stroke the british could cut them off and apparently their leaders are too dumb to see it
who 's in command out there
who the hell knows
everyone 's giving orders
it 's all very democratic
george we 've got to get you out there before we lose our whole army
well john adams your cousin has a marvelous gift
yes an astonishing power over weak minds
with your support horatio
as one of our own who has seen combat with the british your opinion counts
as does your ability horatio
we must talk further when it 's more convenient
you wo n't be needing his largess rhode island is already committed to your appointment
i do n't know delivering men and delivering men with their goodwill are two different things
and if he 's popular with his men
colonel charles lee
hounds and all
quite the character
he 's got a tremendous reputation
i think many would like to see him commander in chief
washington is perfect
he 's a southerner he 's a war hero and he 's rich
he 's from virginia -- there is no more classist elitist
english place on earth than virginia
and what in hell has he done for our cause
washington has been preaching compromise compromise compromise
hancock acts he led the boston tea party
that 's why new england loves him
hancock led the boston tea party because he 's a goddamned tea smuggler
he was n't protesting inequality he was eliminating competition
now you listen to me we need to get a southerner elected commander in chief or the south will not fight
what have we been struggling for all these years
for this moment
and if we fail now remember you stopped us
let 's not over do it
i tell you every damned place i go the man is adored
general washington
champion of trenton
savior of the republic
and you should hear the way people are deprecating congress
makes you gag
gag on your own invention then
oh come now
you invented this this
you think that
he has the soul of an aristocrat who 'd like nothing more than to become a king in the minds of the people
no one wants another failure right now god knows
but people like arnold and god knows i 'm having my fears about general washington
finally
it 's people like these who as soon as they get a little power want more and more
more ale here
again just to touch on a touchy subject but
would the people accept another leader over washington
partially
it 's the political cost of doing business george
i doubt arnold will be afraid
if he is n't then he 's stupid
did god ever make such a pitiful army
these men have suffered but i believe they will fight
no officer is going to get these men to fight
they had the life crushed out of them on long island
at the most perhaps we could make a feint at an outpost then retire to protect congress
i hear general lee is holding seven thousand fresh infantry back in new york -- why wo n't he come on
general lee is detained captain
detained by what
the british army sir
the british army is right back there across that river
sir
i think it must be something else that detains general lee
my god
they mean to finish us
what about arnold
he 's up there
what can he do
the british have massive superiority
if we have any hope for a compromise or truce with england now we have to hold on here our men must believe they can win -- the british must believe that somehow in some mad impossible way we might actually be able to hurt them
i understand george
colonel reed
george
so good to be back
that damned arnold is here is n't he
did you know he lost all his ships
outrageous and completely unacceptable
joseph the british spent thousands of pounds and precious months putting together a fleet that arnold stopped by sacrificing a heap of old barges
in my opinion he saved my army
well george congress just passed a resolution censuring arnold for destruction of government property
i would n't cast my fate with that man
a grand scheme
a ground swell christian movement george you see
no
as a matter of fact i have n't the slightest idea what you 're talking about
to assert the rights of our founding fathers
this country was colonized by christians
this shall become a christian revolution
surely as a good christian you understand that
what do you mean you 're not a christian
of course you 're a christian we 're all christians
i mean i 'm a deist
a belief i share with the likes of tom jefferson and ben franklin
surely you knew that
no i did not
really
well what the hell is a deist precisely
but the hessians are there
no one can beat them
that 's why cornwallis stationed them there
they have the post of honor
they are invincible
they are also very religious
so we will attack them three days from now on christmas
one force under me and another to the south under colonel cadwalader
george i 'm afraid if you go through with this madness i must tender my resignation as your aide
i see where we 're headed you 're putting your trust in the likes of hamilton and arnold
how many generals do we have like arnold
he 's got guts -- he 's vain and he fights
and hamilton
greene
they help me understand why we fight
understand
you need to be listening to people like john adams and to keep the best interest of the country first in your mind
joseph are you afraid to cross that river with me
i accept your resignation
with regret
you have leave to return to philadelphia
gentlemen let me get to the point i ca n't see the wisdom of pursuing this old court martial against general arnold
the man is a traitor
how can you say that
sir please accept my commission from congress
and
you must see this portrait of my beautiful wife adrienne we had the most perfect little baby girl just before i left
her name is henriette
what i want to know is sir where is your daddy
gentlemen my i introduce a french gentleman recently appointed major general by congress
marie joseph paul yves roch gilbert du motier marquis de lafayette
general lafayette has brought us the greetings and goodwill of his countrymen and
how many cases of muskets mon petite marquis
uh
none just now but
continentals congress paper money
it was worthless to start with but as you see counter feiters have made them even less than worthless
can you tell which one is fake
i
they look both the same
the one with philadelphia spelled correctly is the counterfeit
no please an advance on your salary
mon general i have come here to learn and to give not to take
i am serving without salary
you must be very rich
i am
then i understand you too serve without salary
you know since your charming little victories at trenton and princeton the french court is softening
i expect any time now a ship load of supplies
charming little victories
please do n't expect much more of us monsieur
i only meant
these supplies
muskets and uniforms and bayonets
and how rusty are these muskets
sir these are our finest firearms from the armory at charleville
they are a gift from the people of france
well we will accept these charming little gifts
when we see them
meanwhile please take your pick of a horse
i rode here on my horse
chose another
any general worth anything should have a brace of horses
because if the british got off their asses and came up here now we would be smashed
and the revolution would be finished
tell king louis it 's that bad
yes i will write him and tell his ministers and the court
like flowers after the snow melts
when the snow melts mon petite marquis i suspect the only thing blossoming will be bright red british soldiers
what is it marquis
my baby daughter has died
my baby
mon petite henriette
it 's another demonstration against the king
this is the wildest yet
my god these people mean to go to war
they really mean it
surely you knew this was coming
war
no
i did not
when you said compromise was possible i believed it was probable
there 's no middle ground at all
we 're the king 's children
our beloved father the king also refuses to bend
but to go to war over trade over money
surely there 's still time for a compromise
of course if it were that simple
these people
they 're after something else
my god what
the eternal dream of the disenfranchised my dear a classless world
not a very real expectation
well a very real expectation is the british will hang you
they 'll burn mount vernon and they 'll hang you
our marriage is a business just as surely as
i 'm very aware of that
i can not allow the fortune in slaves my first husband created and what our partnership has elevated to be destroyed
do n't be ridiculous of course that wo n't happen
have you been reading what minister jefferson has to say
if he had his way all our slaves would be freed no matter what the outcome
and that would destroy us as surely as a british victory
the day tom jefferson frees a slave i 'll ride naked through the streets of williamsburg on a mule
tom jefferson is one of those people who talks big and acts small
the only man out there who really does what he says is sam adams and everyone thinks he 's crazy
believe me this disturbance is n't going to last long
you have to understand congress is a chicken coop full of foxes martha each and every one has his eye on a nice fat prize
and what prize do you see
what could we possible gain
everything
if we force britain into concessions it will open up the western lands -- and that would be a boon for our family
we already have more slaves than we need but we need more land
but as usual it will not go well for
them
martha you must trust me
you 're no fool george
you never have been
liberty virtue country
that 's from cato
you know that play about the noble romans
as i was riding up to philadelphia i found myself thinking about the old days
when you lived with the fairfaxes
when i was a young man we used to recite cato
we would come together recite it like they were words from heaven
devotion to country duty purity of heart
purity of heart
i was drunk on something then
that 's when sally fairfax was tutoring you
that 's right
and have you heard anything from our dear friend sally
what with all the rumors getting back to england
i thought she might inquire after us
but then i believe she always looked down on us
did you know that jefferson has proposed a law in virginia aiming at an absolute separation of state from the church
i think i heard that
it 's an anti christian dogma
i can not believe you are so calm about it
what else
from virginia
well i would n't want to trouble you with this now
not today
i want you to see our hospital
i do n't want to see your hospital
we ca n't take them
are you all right
we 're leaving them
they 're finished they ca n't help us anymore
they 've done their duty general greene now you do yours
yessir
colonel washington
colonel nathanael greene rhode island militia
yes yes happy to meet you
i
i 'm possessed of the idea of a command in your army sir
it is n't my army yet colonel greene
looks like you 've seen some action -- did you hurt your leg in a fight
i was born with a limp sir
the militia used to hate it when i marches with them because my pike would always sway
but you do come from a military family
i have commanded the rhode island militia for a year now
my father is an ironmaster
as was i.
a horseshoer
yes but i 've spent the last winter studying all the great battles of history
and i read the lives of caesar alexander hannibal
sir i 'm volunteering you the wholehearted support of the rhode island army
the only way to get discipline into these men is to beat it into them
fifty lashes each
sir congress has n't issued their pay for two months many have not eaten properly for at least that long
you 're being a little hard on them do n't you think
nathanael someone bred to station bred to being a gentleman -- unlike these men -- his sense of duty naturally prevails over the baser needs
well sir i was an ironmaster before you got me
maybe i will let you down yet
i certainly did n't mean you
of course you are a gentleman an officer and a gentleman
you wrong me general i am an officer and a horse shoer
general greene
i 'm with captain hamilton
yes i thought that 's how you 'd feel nathanael
at one time i could have chosen not to be
then maybe i do see what you 're after -- perhaps
you get to chose again
what the hell are we doing
you 've got to stop them here or our whole line will cave in
it 's all right boys i 'm here
nathanael i 'm sending you to virginia to head the southern army to harass cornwallis
marquis you must go with him
i 'm honored but reluctant to leave you
sir i have to act on instructions from you ordering thirty copies of your own dress uniform
they 're for my bodyguard
i have an absolute conviction that arnold is planning to have me assassinated
it will be harder if i am surrounded by a body of men who look like me do n't you think
yes sir it 's a wise idea
well this must be about something
it is we need you george
if the constitution is ratified
we 'll have a country
they 'll want to elect you president of the convention which means president of the country
you know i came back to mount vernon to retire
i do n't need to be in government
well the widow curtis will bring you riches position land even half grown children
you wo n't have to do anything at all
you sha n't have to do another thing to prove yourself
you know very well who it is that i love
is that the truth
well we ca n't carry on like animals any longer
george you know i only love you but
but not more than your comfort
and what is this then
been off to fight the french because you are a patriot
or is this you gaining your long sought after rise in society by becoming victorious in war
that 's a lie
is it
william says now you have requested a british commission why not colonial
i 'll clear it up for you sir because as a british officer you can lord over colonial yokels -- more than that it will even get you into polite society
your dream come true george the only dream that really matters to you
perhaps you 've been counting my acres mrs. fairfax and discovered exactly how poor i really am
now that is a lie
see how much you want to create a scandal in exchange for a glowing reputation and polite society laid at your feet
when you break off your engagement to martha curtis i 'll divorce william
do you hear
you get what you want from this world then throw it all away on love
i 'd throw everything away for you
we can grow three primary crops in a season and if we have some luck we get a forth
the temperature is generally mild
except for that quite like home england that is
hear that george
sally 's actually taken to thinking of this clod of earth as her home
and it 's her first tour
we 're gratified are n't we george
think what the play means william
perhaps these words have a place in the real world
words words words
sally has been tutoring george in the philosophies is n't that right
where
do those men come from george
africa of course
africa
that 's so far
how do they get here
slavers capture them and bring them here
capture them
well i 've never seen anything like it so
of course i 'm curious
sally our slave system is a british law
the word minuet finds its source in minitus which is latin meaning small or orderly
or civilized
in the minuet george every movement is significant like the strut of cranes
cranes
who needs to walk like a crane
that 's just my interpretation
actually it 's a dance designed as a sentiment of courtly manners
you see
walk in a gently z
there are four distinct movements
what do you really think of the minuet anyway
it 's stupid of course
then why are you teaching me
perhaps you best ask why you wish it
you asked william to teach you manners philosophy decorum
as i said it 's completely stupid
i always though london was the place to be capital of the world the most spectacular city on earth
the place to want to be is america
every english child dreams of it
i dreamt it
i think america suits you
i do n't laugh at you george
i like you
i like you because you will never ever make it as an aristocrat
and that 's because you 're completely incompetent at hiding your feelings
i think i will disappoint you
what are you doing
let 's get you darker
you 're out of your mind
why
juba was an african and you want to look the part -- hold still
they can use their imaginations
those people
i doubt they 'd think of this
ooo you 're wonderful this color
i 've been surprised in an unguarded hour but must not now go back the love that lay half smothered in my breast has broke through all its weak restraints and burns in its full lustre
i can not if i would conceal it from thee
i 'm lost in ecstasy
and dost thou love thou charming maid
and dost thou live to ask it
remember george it is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong
that 's good
who
voltaire of course
you are a slave owner
you have been illegally surveying lands beyond the ohio valley
that land belongs to the natives
that land belongs to the strongest
all people have rights
just because they are born
yes
who says so
i say
i see
and others say
have you even read locke vattel voltaire diderot
are these philosopher going to be here to help you fight your war
you know why i do n't trust revolutions
because each of us is who we are we make speeches print pamphlets and we never change
the world is not a philosophical abstraction mister adams it 's us
and i do n't believe you can ever change human nature
you hear that
that
i hear a mob unemployed drunkards vagabonds
the world 's dregs
well i hear the people
indentured servants freed slaves
escaped slaves
the world 's castaways
and my fear is in the scramble for power that 's coming you will betray them
is that your test of patriotism george if a man will die for you
god damn you sam adams
you wanted a revolutionary army and now that we 've really got one it scares you more than it does the british
for god sake get that horrid stuff off your face
you look like a damned slave
it 's damned humiliating
juba was a numidian
he was not black
he was
tan
weathered
william we 've been studying hard i really know my stuff
do n't be silly you have whole worlds to fathom
what is this
an oldsmobile silhouette
i reserved a cadillac
yeah well this one 's the cadillac of minivans
you 're kidding me right
hey you want la tierra rent a car just over there but i think all they got are rabbit convertibles
shit now someone 's got ta climb down there and get him
you did n't have to shoot him bo
we coulda just beat him up some
you see that
the way the man just went right over
cat that 's the lamest idea i 've ever heard
yeah well i 'm bored bear
i wanna make movies
and i mean high up in it
that 's why harry 's gon na make mr. lovejoy with me not chili palmer
mr. lovejoy
that 's cute bo
does n't matter what it 's called harry 's got martin weir and it 's gon na be big
they all sound big at the talking stage
he knew it was a set up
he was ready for it
so where 's the money
i guess still in the locker
you guess
you mean you do n't know
i mean i do n't care
you see the paper
i seen it but i do n't believe it
says harry shot ronnie five times
four to the chest and one through his foot
his foot
jeez poor ronnie
yeah i 'm really gon na miss him
i heard in the federal joints they let you spend an extra five minutes at the glass with your daddy on father 's day
farrah
come here
after this one i 'm out cat you understand
this is the last time we talk to each other
remember harry 's story about the dry cleaner palmer was after
guy who stole the three hundred grand from the airline
what about him
i was thinking tonight you could go have a look around palmer 's hotel room while i go check out karen flores place
see if he has n't stashed it somewhere
and if we do n't happen to find it under palmer 's mattress or inside karen flores undie drawer
what then
just do what i told you and meet me back here at midnight
you get the money
no
what 's this
plan b. here ya go honey
trade for what
the money
fuck
i got ta think
you get life for kidnapping
calm down bear
calm down
we 're going away for life and you tell me to calm down
hell why not just shoot her
why not shoot everybody
fuckin shoot me
shoot the fuckin president
do n't fade on me now bear
not unless you wanna hold farrah on your lap in a room fulla felons
and that 's for the airport
hey he should have a weapon a knife or something
we 'll get it later
you keep hittin him like that he ai n't gon na look like he broke in anymore he gon na look like someone beat him up and then shot him
you 're right
look there 's no fuckin way i 'm gon na give you the key outside of you point a gun at my head
then we might have something to talk about
now step away from the car
i do n't need a gun
where is it
if it is n't on you it 's around here someplace
what 're you hanging around with a guy like that for
you were in the movies right
a stuntman
what 's he ever done he can talk about
you feel okay
not too bad
how 'bout when you went down the stairs
i think i pulled my quadriceps
so
how many movies you been in
about sixty
no shit
what 're some of 'em
where is my nephew
your who
yayo
where is he
he 's my sister 's kid
no papa
not too bright
personally i think he 's a retard
i only gave him the job as a favor for my sister you understand
sure
family
i know how that goes
he comes up here with our product
he suppose to come home with five hundred thousand dollars
he never shows up
meanwhile my sister 's going crazy calling me all the time worried about him
me i just wanna know what happened to my focking money
well i do n't know
i gave the man his money sent him on his way
you gave him the money
i gave him a key to a locker that had the money in it
now why would you do that
put the money in a locker
because there were a zillion dea guys hanging around the terminal
a zillion huh
that 's a lot
maybe your nephew panicked took off
where 's your partner the jumpy one
why is n't he here
he 's around someplace
i hear he 's around palm springs
dealing our product
product we sold to you for five hundred thousand dollars
why do you keep talking to me bullshit
i think maybe i have ramon and ceasar staple your tongue to your chin
what do you think
you know you speak very good english mr. escobar
i went to uc san diego
we 're gon na spend the weekend at the universal sheraton
we 're gon na take the tour
see the shark
check out the miami vice action spectacular
after we 'll come here get our money
what 's this movie you 're doing first
harry let me answer that
i 'm just explaining to you what i 'm doing here
case you think i come to rob the place rip off any of this dusty old shit the man has
i 'd never make you as a burglar not in that outfit
harry called you his associate but what does that mean
i never heard your name or read it in variety or the reporter or anyplace
it 's what he said i 'm his associate
you must bring something heavy to the deal
that 's right me
says here you 're getting martin weir for the part of lovejoy
yeah we 're getting martin
no shit come on
how you gon na do that
i put a gun right here
and i tell him sign the paper marty or your fuckin dead
like that
i wonder would that work
you know who i see for al roxy
harvey keitel
the man could do it in his sleep
harvey keitel
yeah
maybe
he was pretty good in the movie fingers
i missed that one
or hey you know who else
morgan freeman
you know morgan
yeah morgan freeman
but he 's a colored guy
so what
where 's it say in this script he 's white
color is what the part needs man somebody to do it has some style
the way it is now ronnie could do it play himself some cracked out asshole
so whatta you think of the script
title 's the first thing 's got to go
and the guy 's name
i mean even this writer 's name murray saffrin is better than lovejoy
i 'm with you on that
and do n't you think it needs a good female part
increase the romance angle
there 's ilona
what about her
get something going there
with ilona
you know how old ilona is
she 's
young
young
she 's fuckin nine years old same age as lovejoy 's kid
bernie
one she calls bernard
have you read the script
yeah i read it
i was just thinking you could make her older
we might even be able to get karen flores
who
she 's been out of movies a few years but she 's good
real good
you know how to write one of these
there 's nothin' to know
you have an idea you write down what you wanna say
then you get somebody to add in the commas and shit where they belong if you are n't positive yourself
maybe fix up the spelling where you have some tricky words
although i 've seen scripts where i know words were n't spelled right and there was hardly any commas in it at all
so i do n't think it 's too important
anyway you come to the last page you write in fade out and that 's the end you 're done
that 's all there is to it huh
that 's all
i really think i can be of service on this one
yeah well we need a ride somewhere we 'll let you know
i need the money
what money
the three hundred grand you got from a little dry cleaner named leo
lemme see if i got this right you break into karen flores house ask me for three hundred grand does n't even belong to you
karen
you okay
she ca n't talk right now
that 's a nice scream lady
you oughta be in movies
alright bo
you can have the money
but it 's not here
i have to go get it
okay
fine
the meantime i 'll just hang on to her for safe keeping
you know laurel canyon
i 'll find it
i 'm at 8150 wonderland avenue
it 's right off laurel
gimme an hour
where 's karen
in the can
that the money
she 's great
gimme the money
first you and me got ta get a couple things straight
you broke in my house and i have a witness to it
what
only this time no john wayne and dean martin shooting the bad guys in el dorado
it was rio bravo
robert mitchum was the drunk in el dorado dean martin in rio bravo practically the same part
john wayne he also did the same thing in both
he played john wayne
man i ca n't wait for you to be dead
bear you 're not really gon na
harry you think we go to see your movies
i 've seen better film on teeth
makes no difference to me which one our money 's in
so how 'bout you take our twenty points out of freaks and put 'em in this other one mr. loverboy
i ca n't do it
you positive about that
it 's a different kind of deal
listen harry how would you like to get your hands on five hundred grand
you pay me back at your convenience no interest
you serious
all i want in return is to work on the movie with you
fact i already got some ideas on how to fix it up
how 'bout another one for mr. zimm
a double
you 're gon na just give me five hundred grand
we 'll talk about that harry
but first i got ta know how 'd you hook up with chili palmer
he was watching letterman huh
sneaky that chili palmer
so he ever find this dry cleaner the one with all that money on him
leo i do n't know
assuming i go along with this when can i have the five hundred
whenever you want it
the money 's in hundred dollar bills inside one of those jock bags you know
in a locker at the airport waiting to be picked up
the airport
it was waiting out there on another deal one that did n't go through one you do n't want to know about
i do n't know
it 's not the kind of thing you do
c-18
that 's the magic number
i can hear you but where the fuck are you man
what i been wondering is where 's he been
yeah where 've you been
we have n't heard from you lately
okay
then be good enough to hand us our money back or you think about us coming in on this new one
by friday man or you 're fuckin dead as disco
hello
you there
yeah i 'm here
i just do n't like the anonymous crap
it means your either chickenshit or not for real
yeah
well trust me
i 'm very for real
okay
so who are you
i work for harry zimm alright
who
harry zimm
the man happens to be a major hollywood player
never heard of him
maybe that 's because you 've never been out've fuckin miami dipshit
maybe it 's time you got on a plane flew out to l.a. and took a meeting with mr. zimm
so what this zimm guy asking for some kinda finders fee that what we 're talking about here
hey zimm does n't ask for dick
zimm tells you the way it is
or else
or else what
or else use your fucking imagination
where 's leo devoe
where 's chili palmer
where 's my fuckin money
ray
look at me
what
look at me ray
you say look at you
that 's correct
look at me
how 'd you get in here
i told them i was you
i acted stupid and they believed me
so what brings you to l.a. bones
do n't insult me
get up and turn around
why would i do that
'cause the guy 's a customer now stupid
his ass belongs to me
i checked the bag at the airport when i came
yeah
which terminal
sovereign
you found leo did n't you
took the poor asshole 's money and put it in a locker ready to go
why have n't you left
i like it here
look there 's no reason you and i should n't get along
forget all the bullshit from before i do n't even remember how it started
you took a swing at me over some fuckin thing whatever it was forget it
you owe me some money right
forget that too
but you do n't say a fuckin word about this to anybody
it 's strictly between you and me right
whatever you want ray
you a quick draw
bro
you better be your piece stuck way down in your belt like that
whatta you got there
some kinda pop nine the fuckin fiat of guns always jammin at the wrong time
you live in miami
that 's right
what 're you doing in los angeles
i 'm in the movie business
you 're an investor is that it
i 'm a producer
you have a card in here
not yet
i just started
your wife a lakers fan
i am
i 'm a fan of everything that 's l.a. i love it out here
by the way you recall the number of the locker you used
it was c
i do n't know sixteen or seventeen one of those
why
you looking for anyway a bomb or something
something should n't be there
why do n't you get the attendant to open all the lockers and take a look
maybe you 'll find it
that 's the idea
i 'll think about it
that 's what i 'd do
make sure i got the right guy next time
get him out've here
anyway you want this guy he 's in l.a. we put him on a flight after he spanked one a my cocktail girls in the keno room
leo spanked a waitress
apparently way it went he invited her to come to santa anita to play the ponies with him
she told him what to do with that and he gave her one on the tush
my guess he 's by his lonesome at the track right now
hey chil
since you 're goin' out to l.a. anyway
what 've you got
guy owes us a hundred and fifty grand sixty days over a movie producer
movie producer
yeah why not
jesus if i have a heart attack i hope you know what to do
where you been harry
have we met
i do n't recall
we just did
i told you my name 's chili palmer
operator how do i get las vegas information
harry lemme give you some advice
a marker 's like a check harry
i know what a marker is
they do n't want to deposit yours and have it bounce
that annoys them
so your dear friend dick allen 's been calling leaving messages on your machine but you never get back to him
i happen to be in vegas on another matter and dick asks me as a favor would i look you up
i follow you over here see you in the window with this woman looks a lot like that actress karen flores was in grotesque except she 's not blond anymore
you 're not looking at me harry
why do i have to keep looking at you
i want you to
you gon na get rough now threaten me
i make good by tomorrow or get my legs broken
come on harry mesas
the worst they might do is get a judgment against you uttering a bad check
i ca n't imagine you want that to happen man in your position
fuckin basketball game
you make movies huh
i produce feature motion pictures no tv
you mentioned grotesque that happened to be grotesque part ii that karen flores was in
she starred in all three of my slime creatures releases you might have seen
karen say hello to chili palmer
chili this is karen flores
karen it 's a pleasure
how you doing
you want to hear this idea
it 's about a dry cleaner who scams an airline out of three hundred grand
go on tell her
you just did
i mean the way you told it to me
start at the beginning we see how the story line develops
it 's the kind of situation you do n't pay you get your legs broken
or the guy thinks he could get 'em broken
you have to understand the loan shark 's in business the same as anybody else
he is n't in it to hurt people
he 's in it to make money
without him
the guy 's so out of it he does n't even know it 's gone
that 's right
as a matter of fact
that 's it
that 's your movie
i said i had an idea that 's all
that 's half a movie with holes in it
maybe forty minutes of screen time
you do n't even have a girl a female lead and on top of that there 's no one to sympathize with you do n't have a good guy
the shylock 's the good guy
the shylock
he 's barely mentioned
and it 's not believable the wife would get a settlement that fast
part of it yeah
wait a minute you 're not the guy are you
the dry cleaner
you mean leo
you would n't be talking to me if you were
i 'm not the guy harry
but you work for the casino
i 'm out here looking for leo
i just looked you up as a favor to your dear friend dick allen
so you do n't work for the casino
is that right that 's what you do for a living
what i did till recently
after i get done here i 'll think about what i 'm gon na do next
i imagine in your line of work there were times you had to get rough you know say one of your customers stopped paying
they always paid
you pack a gun
not really
what does that mean
maybe a few times i have
ever shot anybody
once
really
you ever been arrested
i 've been picked up a couple times
loan sharking
racketeering
but i was never convicted
i 'm clean
racketeering that covers a lot of ground does n't it
these guys my investors they run a limo service came to me originally put money in a few of my pictures and did okay they 're happy
so they come in on another deal this was back a few months ago when i was planning what would be my next picture about this band of killer circus freaks that travel around the country leaving bodies in their wake
the characters there 's this seven- hundred pound fat lady who has a way of seducing guys gets them in her trailer
harry look at me
you 're trying to tell me how you fucked up without sounding stupid and that 's hard to do
let 's just get to where you 're at okay
you blew the two hundred grand the limo guys gave you in vegas on a basketball game and you have n't told 'em about it
why not
because they 're not the type of guys would take it with any degree of understanding or restraint
the first thing they 'd do is break my legs
you got that on the brain harry
if you 're so scared of 'em why 'd you take their money to vegas to begin with
because i need half a million to buy a script
for a movie
a blockbuster
but quality
no mutants or maniacs
this one 's gon na be my driving miss daisy
what 's it called
mr. lovejoy
mr. lovejoy
that 's the title
it 's not bad when you know what it 's about
murray saffrin guy who wrote it did all my grotesque pictures had it in a drawer for twenty years
he shows it to me one day tells me he 's got a star interested would i produce it
who 's the star
anyway murray has this shrink who also happens to be martin 's personal trainer 's shrink
murray gives the shrink the script and the shrink gives it to martin 's trainer who reads it to martin while they work out and martin flips
loves it
so what 's the problem
the problem is murray
he and a few other blocked screenwriters went river rafting down the kern a few weeks ago
murray never made it back
he drown
heart attack
apparently they brought a couple hookers along
doris murray 's widow finds out about this martin weir thing and says since murray and i never had any written contract she wants five hundred grand for the script
so you 're thinking what if i was to put you next to my dry cleaner
ask him if he wants to invest his money in a movie
that or i 'm thinking what if some tragic accident were to befall the widow saffrin
i 'm not gon na pop her harry
just a thought
but i could talk to the limo guys
tell 'em to leave you alone for a while
make the point in a way they 'd understand it
you do n't even know these guys
harry i probably know 'em better than you do
what do you get out of this
let 's see how we get along
lovejoy sits behind the wheel watching the bar across the street getting his video camera ready for action
what 's he doing
following a guy
read it
it 's a grabber
no leave 'em up we want the light in their eyes
i 'll be at the desk
but do n't introduce me let it go just start talking
you 're gon na be here behind 'em when they sit down
they 'll be looking at you
they do n't know who you are
that 's right they 're wondering who 's this guy
you do n't tell 'em
understand harry
do not tell 'em who i am
you do n't say any more'n you have to
you say well i 'm glad you assholes stopped by so i can set you straight
you 're kidding right
what
i do n't know maybe i was n't clear
but i thought
i told you to keep your mouth shut
i had to tell 'em something
never say anything unless you have to
you tell me you want these guys off your back
next thing i know you 're saying yeah maybe they can have a piece of mr. lovejoy
i could n't believe my fuckin ears
i said i 'd think about it
what does that mean
in this town nothing
that 's the difference between you and me harry
i say what i mean
i want something from someone i ask 'em straight out
i want martin weir i go get martin weir
i do n't fuck around with his trainer 's shrink
his shrink 's trainer
how 's anyone gon na see anything from way up there
hey harry
yeah chili
hi
you 're fifty feet in the air
okay harry i 'm wrong
you 're not the one he 's setting up
i mean at least bo 's invested in three of my movies
really
yeah he wants us to talk to buddy set up a meeting
a meeting with who
you and karen
so how 'bout it mr. selznick do i make my deal with bo
or you gon na finally help me out have a word with your dry cleaner when you find him
i found him
forget about leo 's money harry
you have it
harry if i gave you leo 's money you 'd have ray bones all over your ass and then you 'd be in a whole new kinda trouble
who
ray barboni
guy from miami owns leo now that momo died
who the fuck is momo
jesus these fucking names
tell you what harry tomorrow morning when the airport 's crowded i 'll go check it out
if i do n't see a problem i 'll pick up the money
maybe i oughta talk to this ray bones character myself
see if he wants to invest in my movie
do n't waste your time harry
the guy 's not much of a movie fan
now c'mon gimme the key
you cut straight hair in this place or just fags
hey bones looks like you 're gon na have a nice scar up there
maybe these guys can fit you with a rug cover it up for ya
you got a miss
leo devoe
guy 's six weeks over
he died
how 'd you know he died he tell you
yeah he told me
personally
yeah ray he personally told me he got killed in that get away airlines jet went down last month
what get away jet
it was in the herald
yeah well maybe the guy took out flight insurance
check with the wife
hey it 's your book now
you want to check it out go ahead
he 's got a dry cleaning business out on federal highway
yeah
that was a good party
you know marty you were good in the cyclone
martin
it was a beautiful role
all i had to do was find the character 's center the stem i 'd used to wind him up and he 'd play man he 'd play
well you had it down cold
watching you in the movie if i did n't know better i 'd have to believe you were a made guy and not acting
even the fink part
i never met a fink and i hope to god i never do but how you did it must be the way finks act
a few weeks before shooting i went back to bensonhurst just to listen to you guys
see i 'm italian but i grew up in tarzana
so i wanted to pick up your rhythms of speech
we talk different
it 's more like your attitude
your tone your speech patterns demonstrate a certain confidence in yourselves in your opinions your indifference to conventional views
you mean like we do n't give a shit
yeah
kinda
anyway once i have the authentic sounds of speech the rhythms man the patois i can actually begin to think the way those guys do get inside their heads
so you do n't know what i 'm thinking
no i do n't
though i have to say i 'm curious
so you want to know
if you 'd like to tell me yeah
i 'm thinking of a movie
one of mine
one we 're producing
with what
wiseguy money
martin i 'm not connected to those people anymore
not since i walked out of a loanshark operation in miami
what happened
the pressure got to you
pressure
i 'm the one applied the pressure
guy owes me fifteen large and takes off i go after him
the fuck you think i do
martin look at me
i 'm looking at you
no i want you to look at me the way i 'm looking at you
put it in your eyes you 're mine asshole without saying it
like this
what you 're telling me you 're tired
you wanna go to bed
wait
how about this
now you 're squinting like you need glasses
how about this
that 's not bad
that 's what i think of you asshole
nothing
i believe it
i turn it on when i confront the guy
yeah but you have n't found him yet
the guy took off for las vegas
how do i know that
the wife sues the airline
this is a gutsy babe
good looking too
like karen
lemme talk to buddy set up a meeting
buddy
very nice
yeah i like it i 'm high up i can see everything you know
it 's the cadillac of minivans
what 's that
compass
wow
mind if i take it for a spin
whatta you think chill
that 's not bad
i think you got it down
i would n't think you 're that dumb leave over three hundred grand in the closet underneath the extra blanket but i guess you are
i did n't know where else to keep it
where would you
you 're here a while what 's wrong with a bank
they report it to the irs
you do n't open an account leo you put it in a safe deposit box
dip in whenever you want
you 've been losing
i 'm up twelve grand today
from when
you left vegas with four- fifty
who told you that
now you 're down to three ten in the case
you must 've cooled off quite a bit since you got here
how 'd you know i was here
here 's another tip
it was fay was n't it told you about the money
she tell you my whole life history for christ 's sake
i would n't let her if she tried
why i 'm here leo basically is to save your ass
how
by taking my money
you can keep what you won today
that 's yours
it 's all mine
sit down leo
you take all my money but you 're borrowing part of it
at eighteen percent okay
and do n't ask me no more fuckin questions
i 'm leaving
but you wo n't know where i am
i do n't even know where i 'll be
i 'll find you leo
the door from the patio in back
you broke in
no it was open
it was n't locked
what if it was
well basically this guy owes a shylock fifteen thousand plus he 's a few weeks behind on the vig the interest you have to pay
i know what a vig is
the interest is four hundred and fifty dollars a week on fifteen thousand
that 's right
three percent
but a week
that 's a hundred and fifty percent a year
a hundred and fifty six
some'll charge you more'n that go as high as six for five on a short term loan
so three a week 's not too bad
a real bargain
a couple days ago by people from the airliner come to see his wife tell her how sorry they are and all that their plane exploded and offer her a settlement the amount based on what he would 've earned operating the dry cleaner 's the rest of his life
leo had some kind of trouble with his kidneys so they were giving him about ten years
how much is the wife offered
hey
karen
how ya doin'
what 're you doing here
i wanted to come by apologize for coming into your house like i did last night
lemme get this straight you broke in again to apologize for breaking in before
no no
you left the patio door open
you got ta stop doin' that all the nice things you got around here
yeah well make sure you lock it on the way out
rough day on the set
i spent all day crawling out of a grave
the costumer kept bitching 'cause i was ripping my nylons
ripped nylons work
makes the shot more real
... that 's what we finally decided
like in bride of the mutant when you played the whole end with that torn top
you saw that one
yeah
when you turn to the camera to tell the alien mother that her time on earth is finished
when you give us all that look joan crawford wishes on her best day she had that much presence
not even in mildred pierce which by the way was a better book than a movie did crawford even touch the intensity you had in that look
yeah
that was a good scene
i mean for a horror movie
for any movie
i know i 'm better than what i 've been doing the last ten years walking around in a tank top and fuck me pumps waiting till it 's time to scream
man can you scream
yeah
it 's a real gift
i 'm just saying it 'd be nice one time in my career to get the chance to say one great line
you know like in that bette davis picture cabin in the
cotton
yeah you know when bette comes up to the guy on the porch gives him a flirty look and says i 'd kiss you but
how come you stopped making movies with harry
i married martin
that was a full- time job
you read harry 's new one
he says it 's the best thing he 's ever read
he must mean after slime creature 3
that why harry came over last night
see if you could help him get martin in his movie
harry 's dreaming of a forty million- dollar production he 'll never get off the ground with a star he 'll never sign
with or without my help
harry told me martin loves it he flipped
yeah well martin is known for his flipping
he flips over a script and when the time comes to make a deal he flips out
tell you what i 'll stop by harry 's office and pick up a copy for you
do n't go out of your way
well i got ta have a talk with leo my runaway dry cleaner
right
see how your story ends
yeah
right
listen touch of evil 's playing near my hotel
you wanna go check it out
watch charlton heston play a mexican
i think it 's not horrible
i do n't like the title
or the main guy 's name
then you 've read it
not yet
you and harry'll make a great team
i 'm gon na make a deal with him
there a part in it for you
i do n't want to act in it i want to produce it with harry
especially if i help him get martin
sounds fair
what do you get out of it
that why you came over here to ask me that
i want to know
why does anyone want to be in movies
yesterday you were a loan shark
i was never much into it
all that bullshit having to do with respect
it 's bad enough having to treat those guys like they 're your heroes having to smile when they make some stupid remark they think 's real funny
and you think the movie business is any different
yeah well
i like movies
i figure if i help harry make one i 'll find out what you have to do outside of have an idea and raise the money
that does n't sound too hard
i was in the money business and i get ideas all the time
this thing 's actually accurate
i bought it for ten bucks from a kid in a lawn chair on sunset
you were supposed to wait for me with harry at the restaurant
well actually martin the movie we came to talk about is mr. lovejoy
yeah
we understand you read the script and like it
a lot
a locker at the airport
jesus christ harry
tell me you 're not really that stupid
the guy 's setting you up
you pulled out of their freaks deal so he 's paying you back
that was martin
he wants to have lunch tomorrow
that is if you can make it
depends who pays
definitely not martin
movie stars never pick up the check
they have no idea what things cost
most of them do n't know their zip code and a lot do n't even know their own phone number
how 'd you meet martin anyway
not unlike the way nicki met him
except it was a wrap party
why
i do n't know i 'm just havin' some trouble seeing you two together
you do n't like martin much do you
oh i like him
i just think he 's
short
i mean he 's a good actor and all but i 'm wondering what it was exactly you saw in marty
for starters marty was n't martin back then
i think you could be an actor
i know you 're acting sometimes but you do n't show it
you thought i was faking
no
i do n't mean that
i just meant in general
oh
you do n't mean a movie star
more like a character actor
whichever
let 's talk about it tomorrow
i mean i could see myself in movies robert de niro had been in
or i could maybe do an al pacino movie play a hard on
but i could n't see myself in ones like say the one where the three guys get stuck with a baby
they do n't know how to take care of it and you see these big grown up assholes acting cute
hey chili
look at me
harry
my god
what happened
what kinda food they serve at this ivy place anyway
continental but it does n't matter
martin wo n't order from the menu
why not
because a movie star can never order straight from the menu
they have to think of something they have to have that is n't on the menu
harry what 're you doing
you 're supposed to be in the hospital
yeah harry you look like you belong in one of your horror movies
you sure
he 's doing the same thing you did to him playing letterman on tv
it 's not dave
it 's a movie
are you going down
i do n't know
you 're as bad as harry
i 'll go
i 'll go
were you scared up there
you bet
you do n't act like it
i was scared then not now
how long you want me to be scared
i 'll be right back
go get your stuff
what took you so long
could n't find my toothbrush
they 're closing the granview
you know theater down on biscayne
yeah the guy owes momo a few g 's
what i 'm thinkin is maybe momo could buy it
momo could buy it i could run it for him
show some cagney films
what 's momo gon na want with an old place shows old movies people do n't care about no more
outside of maybe turnin it into a porno house i do n't think he 's gon na give much of a fuck
and you already got a job
you sure it was ray bones took the coat
that 's what the guy said
tomorrow i see on the tv weather it 's gon na be nice and warm
you wo n't need the coat
hey chili
get your coat but do n't piss the guy off okay
it could get complicated and we 'd have to call momo to straighten it out
then momo gets pissed for wasting his time and we do n't need that
do n't worry about it
i wo n't say any more than i have to if that
no i said i 'm never goin' to bed
there 's a difference
see the article says most people die in their beds
i figure long as i stay outta bed i 'm safe
that 's the dumbest thing i ever heard
where do you sleep
in an armchair
or i go to a coffee shop sleep there
sit in a booth pull my hat down
yeah but whose point of view
whatta you mean whose point of view the audience 's point of view
get down here
i wanna talk to you
come on
right now
she 's gon na talk to martin
all these camera moves and weird angles and shit are gon na distance us from the emotion of the scene
what emotion
girl just got stabbed in the ear with an ice pick
she 's scared
fear is an emotion
look kid if you remember anything from your time working with harry zimm let it be the three key words to filmmaking
yeah
what three words harry
pick n save
hm
you heard me pick n save
so mildred says to the cashier i saw the new streisand picture
god i just love it at the end when she brushed robert redford 's hair off his forehead the way she did when they were together and the way they gave each other this look that said they still loved each other but knew they could n't be together
that look was so
romantic
that 's great harry
so what 's the --
what she did not say was i just loved the way the director moved the camera so much it made me fuckin seasick
all she cared about was that look
all she remembered was that look
and why do we remember things in movies
because we can see them
hello doris
harry zimm
you look like a wet kiss
well are n't you gon na offer me whatever it is you taste like
come on in
what a spectacular view
yeah lovely
last night i watched two guys carjack a camaro down on the corner of argyle there
what do you want doris
i miss murray harry
yeah me too
he was a helluva good writer
and i would know
i discovered him
made him what he was
what he was was a hack could n't get a job writing for anybody but you
i 'm being honest
he was a lousy writer but he was a good husband
i just did n't know it until too late
what 's wrong
be quiet and listen
i do n't hear anything
when i came upstairs you stayed to finish your drink
i told you to turn off the tv when you were through
come to think of it i also told you you could sleep in the maid 's room
yeah well i turned off the set
i used the remote control thing and laid it on the floor
you know what could 've happened
the dog came in and stepped on it turned the tv back on
i do n't have a dog
you do n't
what happened to muff
harry are you going down or you want me to
anyone skim the pool
it needs it
harry
i 'm going
how did you get in the house
he 's telling me an idea for a movie
it 's not bad so far
sit down have a drink
tell karen let 's see what she thinks
maybe you did n't hear me
that miami flight that went down it was on the news every day for about a week
harry must 've been busy
that 's where you got the idea
with your experience you could always become an agent
right harry
yeah that 's what we need
more agents
well
i got an audition tomorrow
no problem
you go on off to bed
what i 'm saying harry is i want you and your new buddy to get out of my house
oh yeah sure
harry what 're you still doing with those guys
he happens to be loaning me five hundred grand no strings i write any kind of agreement i want
which two
once their lives are in danger and you have the mob guy coming after them it not only heightens the tension it adds a wistful element to their love
mob guy
i have to run
but what i hope to see they begin to have misgivings about wanting the money
it becomes their moral dilemma and they try to rationalize keeping it but in the end they ca n't
can they
what money
the three hundred large
what other money is there
i should keep quiet i know till i 've read the script but i 've got a feeling about this one
i 'm that shylock
shylock
karen
wow
look at you
hello martin
i 'm sitting here i 'm looking at you and i 'm having these flashes
you know flashbacks of memories
of us
really
yeah and i 'm wondering how did it go wrong
how did it all
slip away
it did n't slip away martin you did
when you went off to fuck nicki in the middle of my birthday party
oh for christ 's sake
i know
i 'm doing shylock instead of a shylock
okay what 's my motivation
the acquisition of money
to collect
inflict pain if i have to
lufkin
his
agent
yeah karen knows him
but you are interested
i 'm intrigued yeah
you know what might help you take a look at the cylone again the way a visual fabric is maintained even while the metaphor plays on different levels
hey this your ride chili
hi sweetface
you look great
and mmmmm you smell good too
thanks
i have to consider i mean as the mob guy this is another man 's wife i 'm sleeping with
and after all you have such morals
north island please repeat
over
arctic warrior passenger vessel chimera was lost at sea day two month two year one nine five three
over
north island have you got any additional information
over
affirmative arctic warrior
the vessel chimera was registered to the dobbins kirk line halifax
nova scotia
date of commission day nine month seven year one nine three two
over
roger north island
i am tied to the passenger vessel chimera
and she is afloat
repeat she is afloat
over
roger arctic warrior
i say again our records indicate the passenger vessel chimera was lost at sea
over
roger north island
please advise pending further information
over
affirmative arctic warrior
this is united states coast guard north island station
over and out
arctic warrior arctic warrior arctic warrior
this is united states coastguard station north island
your radio check is affirmative
over
roger that north island
arctic warrior whiskey alpha sierra bravo four zero niner two
over and out
hear that dodge
epps do n't think it 's a problem
i 'll sleep good tonight knowing that
looks like epps gon na get some tonight
with that coxswain dickhead
hypothetically speaking what if we get this boat to sitka and find out somebody wants it back
they shoulda thought of that when they let her float away
i do n't care what ai n't nobody just gon na let us walk away with a ship that size
you think the extra strain caused it
nah
everything was cool
it 's just one of those things
fucker
take it easy dodge
it 's only a piece of metal
damn mind of it 's own
morning skipper
one minute i 'm minding my own business the next thing i know the whole place is burning up
an oxygen tank must 've blown on the welder
started an oil fire
looks like it took out the backup genny too
what 's so great about sweden
it 's a beautiful country
very clean
very civilized
and cold
yeah but not as cold as those swedish girls you only gon na dream about
we 'll see who 's dreamin m'man
where 's his boat then
where 's his crew
he ai n't gon na be out here by himself that 's for damn sure
she 's so big somebody could come alongside her on the other side and we 'd never know it
let 's not be too hasty
yeah
hell what difference does it make if we report it now or later
we call this in now gon na be coastguard fbi who knows who all over the place
i need lag bolts especially one inch standard
and sheet metal
preferably steel about a sixteenth of an inch
aluminium even tin'll do
i ai n't no mechanic just so you know
you find anything that even looks like a compressor
i do n't care what grab it
what day is it
i do n't know
tuesday
wrong
it 's friday
you 'd think on a ship this size there 'd be something left to eat
after fifty years there ai n't nothin' left but shoe leather
where from
amidships starboard at the beam
just under the waterline
i do n't think it 's a problem
one more
why not
what is your first name
what
it just occurred to me i do n't know your first name
all this time and i do n't know it
maureen
what
maureen
maureen
roger
roger
yeah
you think that 's funny
no
probably slipped her moorings got tangled up in a current
out here
what so a seven hundred foot passenger liner drifted out of spokane harbor and nobody managed to bump into her until now
somebody 's probably looking for her as we speak
nobody just scuttles a passenger liner either
ever heard of insurance big boy
if this thing turns out to be a ship everybody thought sank a long time ago we just hit the jackpot
yeah well how the hell you get something like that wrong
that 's a damn big boat
it 's either sunk or it ai n't
last thing we want is extra partners
or uninvited guests
this 's gon na hurt a little
thanks for the warning -- ow
damn
what other choices have we got
i tell you one thing we 're not gon na be towing no ship now
guess i 'll just keep working
what 're you crazy
i like my job
light in those passages ai n't so good
i 'm telling you i saw somebody
i do n't know who it was
but i saw somebody
maybe that is his boat
gimme a break
pretty handy with that scatter gun epps
you raised on a farm
seen a lota movies
smokes
oh yeah
i 'm no doctor
but i 'd say he 's in a coma
a what
i do n't know what else you 'd call it
he 's breathing on his own but his pupils are completely blown out
he 's totally unresponsive to pain
what happened up there
i heard a scream
when i got there i found him on the floor
he was having some kind of seizure
i did n't see anybody else
other than the obvious there 's nothing wrong with him that i can see not on the outside
then what the hell happened to him
try wednesday
right
wednesday
did you
hell no
you think i 'm crazy
what say epps
you up for some roasted albatross
why not
dodge
dodge
what
get up
yeah yeah
yeah from one side of the harbor to the other
but we got half the bering sea and the whole alaskan gulf to drag her over
you have any idea how much a ship like that could be worth in salvage
the fittings alone could go for a few million
if you get it back in one piece
it 's a risk i 'm willing to take
it 's a bloody navigation hazard
one boat ca n't control a ship that size
the damn thing 's been floating around for god knows how long and it has n't hit anything yet
so we take it easy
a little of the old push pull
with a little extra fuel weather permitting we should make sitka in five days without another stop
sounds reasonable
mother fucker
what is it
threw a turbine blade
the number one turbine 's pretty well trashed
number two runs but it 's way underpowered
how long to fix
hard to say
i got ta get in there and have a look
at least a couple days
depending
what 's this
turbine rotor 's shot
i thought you said it was just a blade
metal 's crystallized
got ta replace the whole deal
how much longer 's that gon na take
like i always say --
i know i know two ways to do anything --
the right way and the wrong way
but how long
hard to say
we got ta get outa here dodge
a storm blows up and we 're history
i 'm telling you you do n't want to be running that fan like it is
what about running number two by itself
it 's a full 2500 horses down
we could n't drag that boat down hill on ice with it
how long then
i got ta pull the blades and re seat everything in a new rotor --
how long
three four days
goddamit dodge
what do you want me to tell you that we can throw this sucker back in and start pulling her like nothing happened
ca n't do it skipper
obviously it 's some kind of screw up
the shipping records are n't a hundred percent accurate
man it gives me the creeps
we got no business towing a ship that size anyway
i say we fix the turbines and hit the highway
went aboard
she take a radio
or somebody stopped them
either way they must 've had a pretty good reason
so what 're we gon na do
that 's the big question right
a salvage claim to a vessel 's cargo 's as valid as a claim to the vessel itself
it 's ours
then we 're rich
we 're damn filthy stinking rich
it looks like it
you got ta be kidding
what the hell we need that tub for we got fifty million bucks
so we get a little more for the boat
besides the gold'll be safer where it is
yeah yeah
i 'm on it
the sooner we get under way the sooner we are to spending what 's ours
i 'm buyin me a nice outrigger
spend my time hauling rich seattle business men through the puget
how about you epps
dreamin 's all any of you 're gon na be doing if we do n't get this boat running
yeah yeah
sounds like the hull
warm water current maybe making the metal expand
if somebody 's aboard her already she ai n't ours
she 's theirs
bullshit
that boat has n't made steam for fifty years
we found her
she 's ours
not in the eyes of the law
if he 's reasonable maybe we can make some kind of deal
if not
we 'll have to re consider our options
yeah reconsider fucking his shit up
bodies're too fresh
fresh ai n't the first word that comes to mind
damn barbaric is what it is
could be meant as a warning
that 'd be my guess
so whoever did this might still be around
ca n't you use something else
i might be able to find something on the ship
but it 's gon na take time
do what you need to do
just do it fast
right
dodge to murphy
murphy
you better get down here quick skipper
i 'm on c deck
cabin 400
what is it
i think you better see this for yourself
it was a man 's voice
repeating some sort of children 's rhyme
i do n't know it did n't make any sense
you did n't hear it
not me
on a passenger ship in 1953
if they knew what they were carrying
just what the hell do you think you 're doing
i do n't know what you 're talking about
i think you know
maybe you can tell me then
the radio
the radio
oh yeah the radio
take it easy willya
what about the radio
you smashed it
what
do n't lie to me
what the fuck --
you did n't want us calling anybody
too liable to ruin your big payday
i did n't touch the fucking radio
i did n't touch the fucking radio
ever occur to you there 's somebody else on that boat skipper
conveniently enough for you
look i did n't touch it
alright
yeah
you better get down here right now
we 're taking water
big time
what the hell happened
turbine chamber on number two must 've blown
took out part of the hull
that oughta buy a man pretty much anything he wants
if money can buy what he wants
i do n't figure there 's much i want money ca n't buy
then you 're a lucky man
we 'll stand the watch on deck tonight
you 're up first
right
what 's slow
maybe twenty gallons an hour
morning everybody
show your tatoos to that coxswain last night did you epps
showed him a hell of a lot more than that
i bet you did
could be a fishing boat
too big
more like a freighter
looks like one hell of a stick up his ass
he 'd let you off at the nearest port that 's for sure
you mean before she sank
cargo like this could make a crew think twice
then why did n't they take it
probably did n't have time
two hundred twenty two kilograms of solid gold
that 's what i call a payday
hell yeah
that 's a good thing
hell yeah
i like it cold
colder the better
stay away
or else
because of the gold
any dizziness
no
headache nausea lights
lights
sudden flashes of light
i feel fine
i do n't even want to know what that 's gon na taste like now
better than starving to death
you okay
yeah
fine
i just thought i heard something is all
what
nothing
let 's get outa here
i ca n't believe you
dodge 's dead and all you can think about is cashing in your share
i did n't sign up to go home empty handed
and i sure ai n't gon na roll over for the freaky motherfucker did this
candy
it 's my pen name
go on
salvage fees on a vessel like this could come in around four million bucks
at least
who knows could be more
could be a lot more
what i 'm proposing is
we split it four ways
the law 's on our side
if they want to challenge it let them try
they must 've scuttled it
nobody just lets a ship float away
ever heard of the mary celeste
nope
she was a two masted brig boat sailing out of new york in 1872
one day she was sighted off the coast of portugal by a merchant vessel the dei gratia
as the crew of the dei gratia got closer they discovered that no one was at the helm of the mary celeste
on boarding they found her completely deserted
the captain his wife their daughter and the entire crew all gone
the last entry in their log made no mention of any trouble
the table was even set for dinner
and in the nine days after the last entry she sailed 700 miles without anyone aboard
so what did happen
nobody knows
there 've been a lot of theories of course
but we 'll never really know for sure
you think she 's sailing without a crew
i think we 'd be surprised where a drifting ship might wind up with a little wind and the right current
you 're more practical than superstitious
only way to be
maybe they did n't want it back
maybe the whole fat deal was insured
maybe
but there 's always somebody whose interest 's at stake
why not call for help
for now the best thing we can do is to keep quiet about this
take it easy you 'll live longer
did you see him
who
the guy
he just came this way
what guy
there 's somebody else on this boat
what
what the hell're you talking about
i saw him
just a minute ago
some guy
are you sure
of course i 'm sure
i saw him
you sure it was n't me
it was n't you
it was somebody else
there 's somebody else aboard
so we find this guy and make a deal with him
we do n't exactly have the best bargaining position
guess that 'd be me
again
dodge get on that turbine
i do n't care if you do n't sleep for a week
the sooner you 're done the sooner we can get out of here
how 's the food situation
no cowboy shit up there understand
no cowboy shit
right
just before i heard him yell there was somebody on the radio
greer
i do n't know
no
not greer
somebody
he needs a doctor
i 'll call us in
dodge see how many signal flares you can scrounge up
keep an eye on him
how 's he doing
same
any luck
no
i 'll try again later
they 're dead in the water that morning
four hours later the captain 's relieved of his command
and that evening they issue a general sos
possibly false
hence the ima record of being lost at sea
i do n't think mutiny 's out of the question here
you 're saying they mutinied for the gold
if they were close enough to shore they probably figured they could get away in the lifeboats
only something must 've gone wrong
the ah
the radio 's out
what
somebody took it out of commission last night
smashed it up pretty bad
but who --
the crew have gone mad with greed and fight among themselves like wild dogs over fresh kill
february first
the same day she supposedly went down
must not 've been the captain 's entry
he was probably out of the picture by then
it 's not gon na hold us
does n't matter
hey
hey
could n't sleep
wish i could say the same
what do you think happened on this boat
i guess that 's the sixty four thousand dollar question is n't it
the what
never mind
before your time
i think at least some of the crew went a little nuts
the usual stuff that happens when people stumble on a fortune
equal parts greed and paranoia usually resulting in homicide
what happened after that is anybody 's guess
but judging by our greek friends down below it does n't look like the last time
are we smart enough to avoid that
i do n't know are we
when you found me yesterday at the pool
i 'd seen
something
someone
not our mystery guest again
no
someone else
a girl
i 'm not sure she was
real
what like some kind of ghost
i do n't know what else you 'd call her
one second she was there the next she was gone
maybe hallucination is the wrong word
it was more than that
as though they were showing me
showing you what
what happened
maybe it was one of them did the handy work on those greeks
no
i think they are were just passengers
innocent victims
victims of what
something bad happened here murphy
that much i think we 've already established
more than just a mutiny
more than just the gold
she said the ship was evil
that we had to leave right away
that if we did n't we might never leave
what 's that supposed to mean
i do n't know
why you
how come the rest of us have n't seen these people
just lucky i guess
epps
you there
right here
what do we do with him
leave him till we can get some help
from now on nobody comes down here
what do you think
could be a stroke
who knows
the general log said the crew were fighting among themselves
like wild dogs
over the gold
maybe it was more than that
they went crazy
crazy with greed
not crazy
not like him
hard to say which is worse staying here or taking our chances in open water
if the weather holds it might not be so bad
it 's not the weather i 'm worried about
the wrong current could drag us as far as the aleutians before we come across another boat
what happened
we hit land
what
we 're in an island chain
it 's only a matter of time before we hit another one
greer 's gone
he broke out of the tank
you killed them
it was only a matter of time before somebody killed somebody
you saw it coming as well as i did
dodge had his plans starting with scuttling the boat
and greer too except he went nuts
could n't take it i guess
could 've happened in the middle of downtown anchorage
but did it make him any less dangerous
i do n't think so
so you killed them
the way i figure it it was them or me
i thought putting dodge up on that pipe was a nice touch
bought a little time
made it look like whoever killed those greeks was still around
but it 's just us on this ship
us and your
spirit friends
and now you 're gon na kill me is that it
i did n't want it to turn out this way
murphy do n't you see what 's happening
i think i see it pretty well
it 's the ship
the ship 's making you think this way
i know a little bit about human nature and what i 've seen only confirms that
it 's a trap
there was no way we were gon na get away with that gold
nobody ever does
it 's just the bait
this ship sucks people in and it never lets them out
i think maybe you been on this boat a little too long with all that supernatural mumbo jumbo
there 's nothing supernatural about greed
and that 's what it comes down to pure and simple
i do n't give a damn about the gold
i wish i could believe that
either way you know what i 've done
i 've got no choice
greer to murphy
go
red sky at night sailor 's delight
red sky in morning sailor take warning
yeah
there 's a large vessel out about ten miles to the north west
i been watching it for close to an hour and it has n't moved
i ca n't raise it on the radio either
makes me think it might be in trouble
alright
i 'll be right up
too deep to anchor out there
looks like it 's adrift
call the coastguard
steer to one eight five
let 's check her out
it 's funny
how 's that
besides a little rust everything 's pretty well preserved
murphy goddamit
sorry
whatever the reason she 's adrift and abandoned
we 've got every right to salvage her
you mean tow her back
that 's a thirty thousand ton ship you 're talking about
we 've done it before
morning
you 're up late
guess i must 've fallen back to sleep
where 's epps
how much you figure that 's worth skipper
hard to say
maybe forty fifty million
ho baby
if they thought it was lost at sea they probably just wrote it off
not for fifty million
an ocean liner maybe
but fifty million in gold they come looking for
so what
we gon na unload the gold and get a move on
we leave it where it is
stick to the plan
yeah but we still got ta haul that big piece of shit all the way back to sitka
it 's worth the effort
believe me
besides we 're gon na need her to prove the salvage
i heard that
dodge you got ta get on those repairs
what now
we could call for help
and get a bunch of fools sniffin around here
fifty million four ways
that 's twelve million and change a piece
what you gon na do with your share skipper
not much at all i guess
retire
live out my golden years and all that
i say we off load some of that gold now
would you hold on just a minute here please
look there 's no reason to panic now
epps saw somebody
fine
it 's a big boat
chances're real good he does n't even know about the gold
if we stay cool nobody'll be the wiser
the gold stays where it is til we 're ready to go
like i said it 'll be a hell of a lot safer there than here
pretty low all around
we 'll have to take it easy then
i do n't think we 'll find much aboard the ship but it 's probably worth looking around
ho ly shit
could n't have happened much more than a month ago
greek citizen
merchant navy
obviously we are n't the first to come across this ship
they probably stumbled across it just like we did
and look what happened
maybe epps 's mystery man had something to do with it
maybe
never been more thirsty in my life
drink up then
how 're you feeling
lost my sea legs
what happened
you do n't remember
last thing i remember i was aboard the chimera
down somewhere in there scavenging around
you 've been out for about a day
say what
dodge found you out cold in one of the cabins
we ai n't exactly in what you 'd call your high traffic neighborhood either
the coast guard has our last position
they 'll send somebody out soon enough
a ship this size you ca n't exactly miss
gettin a little hot under the collar i 'd say
shut up
must be a little too the truth eh dodge
it 's a noaa buoy
a what
government weather
it 's got a transmitter aboard
we 're still drifting
the mooring has n't come taught
he took the shotgun and a light
must 've heard something below deck and went down to check it out
ca n't find the shotgun
so whoever did this now has our shotgun
does n't look like it much matters
what about the gold
leave it
now hold up just a minute
let 's be reasonable here
you think whoever did this is reasonable
all i 'm saying is that gold 's worth a lot more to us now than it ever was
nobody 's going anywhere with that gold now
anybody tries to board we 'll know about it
you can do what you want greer
but neither of us is gon na risk saving your ass down here if it comes to that
fine with me
these ladies was having themselves a discussion and you 're interrupting it
you got about two seconds to get your paws off me tarzan
or what
i thought you say tuesday
better late than never
what 's this
you got a leak in the number nine compartment
no no
you got leak
you pump it out and re seam the hull she 'll be good as new
that cost me twenty grand at least
fifteen at the most
twenty
you knock off twenty and then we see
after my guy looks at it
you 're kidding right
you want fair pay make hamburger for mickey d. otherwise please to sign
have you seen my blue spatula
nope
what are you making pancakes
not if i do n't find that goddamn spatula
will you get off my back for once
it 's tough to find a good job without any kind of training
look i told you i 'm not going to college
well i think it 's good to keep all your options open
you can always enroll for the winter quarter
you could even live here and go to the city college part time and still get a job if you wanted to
look at me -- i 'm not even listening to a word you 're saying
did i tell you who i ran into at the bagel place
who
guess
how should i know
someone from the past
who
give up
yes
maxine
not the maxine
yup
god how horrifying
hi
look i 'm kind of tired i think i 'll go to bed
i made spaghetti
do you want some
i i really have to get up early for class tomorrow
i have some good news for you pumpkin
what is it now
are you still looking for a job
i guess
well maxine thinks she can get you a sales job at computer station
normally you have to have references and at least two years of experience but she thinks she can convince them
tell her to forget it i do n't need her help
pumpkin are you in there
are you going to yell at me
about what
yeah i heard about that
i was in a horrible mood tell her not to worry i 'll be completely out of her life in a few days
she understands what you 're going through and she really wants to help you
she says that job at computer station is still available if you want it
i i'm not sure
yeah maybe
actually i was just checking to see if you were here your friend seymour is on his way up
what do you mean on his way up
i just buzzed him in
what 's wrong with you
tell him i 'm not here
but i ca n't --
just do it
that was great jeez thanks again for cooking all this
oh i love to cook
i guess most women would n't invite a man over on the first date but i believe you should trust your instincts
when i talked to you on the phone you just seemed so
i do n't know
harmless
ready for ice cream
here we are
it 's mocha mint from lickety splits
oh is n't that photograph just heart rending
yeah
where is this
bosnia
was it bosnia
i forget
it 's so sad the tragedy of an entire country eloquently captured in the face of one little boy
a soul funk song starts up on the radio that catches her attention
she goes over and turns it up
oh i just love this song
is n't it great
does n't it make you want to dance
c'mon
uh well that 's okay i do n't dance heh heh
do n't be silly anyone can dance
here just follow me
watch my feet
no really i --
hey it 's nearly nine already we 're gon na have to leave now if we 're going to make that movie
oh all right
party pooper
just let me put a few things away
i 'm so excited to see this film dustoffvarnya is such a brilliant director
did you see his last film the flower that drank the moon
it was simply glorious
uh no
i missed that one
but what do i know
i like laurel and hardy movies
really
i never really cared for those
why does the fat one always have to be so mean to the skinny one
seymour
uh
hello
i guess i 'm a little early
dana
hi
uh dana
this is enid
hello
seymour
hello
what are you doing here
oh -- please do n't let me interrupt finish your phone call
we 're almost done
hi
yeah
no it 's excluded
they 've already paid the earnest money
well let them bring it up if they notice it at the final walk through
right great sounds good
and what can you tell us about this
enid
it 's sort of like a diary i guess
who is this enid
it 's supposed to be don knotts
and what was your reason for choosing him as your subject
i dunno
i just like don knotts
i see
interesting
these are all valid comments but i think we should see if the artist has anything to bring to this
well i got the idea when i was doing some research and i discovered that cook 's chicken used to be called coon 's chicken and so i decided to do my project based on this discovery as kind of a comment on racism
and the way racism is whitewashed over in our culture
did you actually do this painting
well no it 's more like a found art object
and how do you think this addresses the subject of racism
it 's complicated
i guess i 'm trying to show how racism used to -- more out in the open and now it 's hidden or something
and how does an image like this help us to see that
i 'm not sure
i mean
i guess because when we see something like this it seems really shocking and we have to figure out why it 's so shocking
enid can i talk to you for a minute
uh oh
do n't worry it 's nothing bad
i was just wondering what your plans were for next year
i 'm not really sure working i guess
well i know this is really short notice but i got a call from a very close friend at the academy of art design and she tells me that i 'm allowed to place one student from your graduating class in a one year scholarship program
and well i hope you do n't mind enid but i took the liberty of submitting your name
hmm
as far as i know it includes housing and meals and everything
it is really quite an offer
... wow
so what do you think
i dunno
would i have to take classes and stuff
well yes
i
let me know as soon as you can enid
this could be a great thing for you
enid
i 'm so sorry about what happened
what do you mean
the whole business with the art show and the newspaper -- it 's absolutely --
huh
did n't principal jaffee call you
i did n't check my messages
oh my goodness
well the whole thing is just ridiculous and as soon as the school board is back in session next fall i 'm going to do everything i can to help you
help me what
well they 're forcing me to give you a non passing grade in the class because of what happened at the exhibition
but do n't worry -- i 'm sure i 'll be able to get you your diploma in the fall
but
can i still get that scholarship to the art academy
i 'm sorry enid you have to be an official high school graduate before i can nominate you
i had to give it to someone else
but i 'm sure next year i can --
i 'm gon na let you handle the four thirty crowd by yourself that way i can evaluate your performance while it 's slow and ease you into the bigger crowds
you can count on me sir
what are you doing
you do n't ever criticize the feature
why
what difference does it make
you already got his money
look that 's the policy
if you want to make up your own rules you can open your own theater
but i was only trying to be friendly
look we do n't pay you to be a movie critic -- just do your job
okay okay
i wo n't say a word
so josh
look can we talk in a minute
i 'm almost done
that guy rules
who doug
he spends more time here than i do
so josh will you give us a ride
please
pretty please
it 's going to be super fun
no
why do you even need a ride
you could walk there in two minutes
it 's just an excuse for us to spend time with you
are n't there a million places like this
this is the ultimate
it 's like the taj mahal of bad fake 50 's diners
so where 's weird al
shh
he 's back there
i can see his hair bobbing up and down
yeah right
no i 'm serious
give us your whole basic philosophy in a nutshell
that 's not him
jesus stop freaking me out
in answer to your question i suppose i endorse policies that are opposed to stupidity and violence and cruelty in any form
i figured something like that
jesus look at this guy
oh my god that 's him
forget it
come on josh
do n't you want to see where he lives
no
but this guy is like a one of kind rare butterfly and we have to follow him back to his natural habitat
you need counseling
are you the one who left that note
i guess
do you want something to drink
why
what do you mean why
are you trying to get me wasted so you can take advantage of my womanly charms
yeah right
yeah right
well why not
what 's so wrong with me
nothing
then why do you hate me so much
when did i say i hated you
you 've never once said anything even remotely nice to me
you make me nervous
i always feel like you 're going out of your way to make me feel uncomfortable so you can laugh at me
that 's just the way i am
yeah well --
it 's just my stupid way of getting attention
god i practically love you josh
you must have known all along how i -- you know -- how i felt about you -- it must be totally obvious
god
i always used to dream about this
why do you have that stupid poster
oh hi
why do all guys have to play stupid guitars
it 's so typical
either they 're into cars or guns or sports or guitars
it 's so obvious
how long have you been up
i could n't sleep
i should get going i feel really weird
do you want to go get breakfast somewhere
i do n't think we should
look you have to totally promise me you wo n't tell becky about this
why not
because if you do i 'll kill you
okay
i promise
just take my word for it
if she ever finds out about this i 'll never hear the end of it
hi enid
hey josh
are you ready to go
god what a bunch of retards
i thought chipmunk face was never going to shut up
i know i liked her better when she was an alcoholic crack addict
she gets in one car wreck and all of a sudden she 's little miss perfect and everybody loves her
it 's totally sickening
let 's see if they gave me the right diploma
what
oh suck my fucking dick
what
these assholes are saying that i have to go to summer school and take some stupid art class
why
remember that stupid hippie art teacher who failed me sophomore year
i did n't think that just because you get an f that means you have to take the class over again
you loser
this is so bad it 's almost good
this is so bad it 's gone past good and back to bad again
oh my god look
is stacy himmler going out with rod harbaugh
how perfect
he better watch out or he 'll get aids when he date rapes her
god just think we 'll never see dennis again
good
god think about that
that 's actually totally depressing
hi
look at these people behind you
i 'm totally convinced they 're satanists
why
just look at them
so when are we going to start looking for our apartment
soon
i have to wait and see how this summer class goes
did you sign up yet
yeah i just picked the one that sounded the easiest
god it 's so weird that we 're finally out of high school
we 've been waiting for this our whole life
now we can get our own apartment and do anything we want
it 's such a weird feeling
i know it has n't really hit me yet
hey look the satanists are leaving
we should follow them
much later
in fact never
what do you do if you 're a satanist anyway
you know sacrifice virgins and stuff
that lets us off the hook
maybe there 's some weird secret satanic society that meets at the quality cafe and all of the other regular customers are in on it except for us
or maybe not
maybe they 're slowly poisoning us or they 're planning to brainwash us and --
okay okay
hey look at this
hi al
can we call you weird al
i might actually get the pasta special
you loser
did you notice all those weird things on the menu
like the salad explosion
i know
and instead of dessert it says mindbenders
what does that even mean
check out the personals
maybe our future husbands are trying to contact us
god this paper is so boring
who reads all this shit
here we go
windsurfing doctor mensan iq maverick sagittarius
let 's hit the clubs make each other laugh
you can have that one
okay well here 's yours
who said all the most eligible bachelors are taken
not this one
stunning bod very snugglelicious ocean sunset dreamer
gross
jesus
listen to this one do you remember me
airport shuttle june 7th
you striking redhead with yellow dress pearl necklace brown shoes
i was the bookish fellow in the green cardigan who helped you find your contact lens
am i crazy or did we have a moment
god that 's so pathetic
i bet she did n't even notice him
i know
and he 's like psychotically obsessing over every little detail
we should call him and pretend to be the redhead
oh we totally have to
does oomie really like this show
is n't it weird
it 's her favorite
so what should we do
wait
i just want to see what 's on this tape
what is this
i dunno
john ellis always puts on all this sick stuff that i have to fast forward past to get to the good stuff
there 's supposed to be a don knotts movie on here someplace
hey why do you have this
you lent it to me in like tenth grade
i 've been looking all over for this
i want to do him
i bet
actually he reminds me of that one creep you went out with -- you always go for guys with some lame fake shtick
what are you talking about -- who
that larry guy -- what look was he going for
a gay tennis player from the forties
fuck you
hey
we forgot to call the loser
which loser
you know the green cardigan guy
oh yeah
you call
why do i always have to do it
you 're better at it
i remember when i first started reading these i thought dwf stood for dwarf
what does it stand for
shh it 's his answering machine
we hear the indistinct traces of a musical message followed by a faint beep
god i think josh is too mature for us
i know look at the way he drives
he 's like an old man
yeah josh c'mon
move it
look maybe that 's him
it 's still twenty five minutes early
i want to make love to him
i 'm going to tell him you said that
shut up
she says she wants to mmph
is he wearing a green cardigan
what exactly is a cardigan anyway
what 's he doing now
he 's still just sitting there
god this is totally unbearable
do you think he knows
i dunno
are you sure
totally
look
he 's insane
we should follow him home
he does n't even look that bummed out really
i know
would n't you be totally pissed off
this kind of thing must happen to him all the time
this is way too creepy
he wo n't see us
we 'll just stalk him from a distance
i 'm afraid if i see him i 'll start feeling really bad again
the w.c. fields fan club newsletter
oh my god the national psoriasis foundation
bingo
what should we do
what if he recognizes us
come on it 's too late now
he was so excited when you bought that record -- you 're a saint
god these apartments are super expensive
it was so cute how he had his own little bags
i thought i was going to start crying
do you think they 're gay
what about the striking redhead in the yellow dress
oh yeah
he should totally just kill himself
hey here 's one
oh wait
you have to share it with a non smoking feminist and her two cats
i dunno
i kind of like him
he 's the exact opposite of everything i really hate
in a way he 's such a clueless dork that he 's almost cool
that guy is many things but he definitely is n't cool
this one would be okay but there 's no kitchen
yeah but
you know what i mean
not really
forget it i ca n't explain it
we 're not sure yet that 's why we 're looking
somewhere downtown
funky
what is she black now
i 've been thinking about when we look for our apartment how we have to try and convince people that we 're like these totally rich yuppies
what are you talking about
that 's who people want to rent to
it 's a known fact that it 's way easier to get a job and everything if you 're rich
all we have to do is buy a few semi expensive outfits and act like it 's no big deal
it 'll be fun
you just want an excuse to dress like some stupid fashion model without me making fun of you
just promise you 'll do it
okay okay i promise
jesus you 're out of your mind
what
how long have you been standing there
did you have to buy new hair dye or did you still have some left over from eighth grade
fuck you bitch
we still have to go in there sometime
it 's always closed
i bet they have tons of incredible shoes hidden in the back
where are we going
let 's go hassle josh
hassle
there he is
as always
waiting for the bus that never comes
i wonder if he 's just totally insane and he really thinks a bus is coming or --
why do n't you ask him
why are we going here
i hate this place
it 'll only take a second
what was that all about
it 's not like i 'm some modern punk dickhead
it 's obviously supposed to be a 1977 punk look but i guess johnny fuckface is too stupid to get it
i did n't get it either
everybody 's too stupid
how about this one
hey you have to see my new good luck charm
ew
when did you get that
this morning at seymour 's garage sale
god are n't you tired of seymour yet
how about this
forget it
i 'm sure it sucks
all these movies suck
let 's get out of here this place makes me sick
we have to do something fun tonight this is my last weekend of freedom before i start my stupid job
i know a party we could go to
what
where
it 's a surprise
i do n't believe you
if i promise you there 's really a party with a lot of guys do you promise you 'll go
i totally totally hate you
aw c'mon this is a fun party
i 'll be right back i 'm gon na go get a beer
wait
god how can you stand all these assholes
i do n't know
some people are okay but mostly i feel like poisoning everybody
at least the wheelchair guy is sort of entertaining
he 's a total asshole
he does n't even need that wheelchair he 's just totally lazy
that rules
no it does n't
you 'll see
you get totally sick of all the creeps and losers and weirdos
but those are our people
yeah well
so when are you going to get your job
i 'm working on it
i 've got a few leads
it 's just that right now i have all these projects that take up all my time
like what
nothing
do n't worry
i promise i 'll get a job next week
god i ca n't believe you went to anthony 's without me
... you do n't have to make a million dollars -- just get any stupid job so we can at least start looking for an apartment
i wonder if i hang around with you because you 're like my surrogate mother figure or something
like i have this subconscious biological need to be nagged and bitched at constantly
you hang out with me because nobody else can stand to be around you
or maybe
did you ever think that deep down we really might be lesbos
maybe that 's why we spend so much time together
you 're gross
see that guy
which one
he gives me a total boner
he 's like the biggest idiot of all time
you 're just jealous
yeah right
believe me at this point i 'm over the fact that every single guy likes you better than me
face it you hate every single boy on the face of the earth
that 's not true i just hate all these obnoxious extroverted pseudo- bohemian losers
sometimes i think i act so weird because i 'm crazy from sexual frustration
have n't you heard about the miracle of masturbation
... maybe we should be lesbos
get away from me
are you kidding
it 's a dream job
i ca n't believe you got a job like that without even trying
god i wish that was my job
yeah maybe it 'll be okay
at least i 'll get to see every movie for free i guess
i had to lie and tell them i already graduated
when are you finally going to get your diploma
i dunno but next week is my last class
anyway now we can start looking for the apartment
do you remember when we first came up with that whole idea of renting our own apartment
was n't it like eighth grade
seventh
you wanted to move out right then
that must have been when my dad was married to maxine
i remember our big plan was as soon as we got the apartment we were going to trick daniel dusentrieb into coming over and then fuck him
we were such desperate sluts back then
what are you talking about
what kind of loser gets fired after one day
i told you my manager was a total asshole
do n't worry i 'm going to get another job
and anyway i have some ideas for how to make money in the meantime
this is it
i ca n't believe you 're selling some of this stuff
fuck it
everything must go
oh my god i remember this hat
this was during your little old lady phase
what was that all about
i thought everything must go
oh yeah right like i 'm gon na let some asshole with a goatee own goofy gus
now are you going to get a regular job
do n't worry
if it makes you feel any better i do n't think you could 've gotten more than ten bucks for all this stuff
yeah thanks
look we have to get these
i ca n't afford stuff like this right now
i 'm sick of waiting we need to start getting stuff if we 're ever going to move
are n't these the greatest towels
why do you care about this kind of stuff
do n't you want nice stuff
i ca n't imagine spending money on towels
you do n't have to
i 'll pay for all the stuff right now and you can pay me back when you finally get a job
you 're insane
do you still want to go to that thing tonight
what thing
that guy 's band is playing tonight
alien autopsy
oh yeah
maybe
seymour 's going on his big date tonight and i kind of want to be around when he calls so i can hear how bad it went
god i 'm so sick of seymour
hello
do you still want to do something tonight
what happened to seymour
i ca n't believe it he actually scored
how repulsive
so should i come over
actually i 'm just about to go out with some friends
what are you talking about
who
just some people from work
i do n't believe you
yeah well you said you were busy
look i 'd better get going
i 'll call you tomorrow
where are we
this is a weird neighborhood
it 's a totally normal average neighborhood
i just mean it 's weird to me
i 've never been anywhere near here in my life
josh says this is a really good neighborhood
what
when did you see josh
he came into work
why
what did he say
nothing
when was this
i do n't know
god do n't act so jealous i only talked to him for two minutes
twenty seven fifty three
do you see it
that must be it
great
what
it looks totally normal
what 's wrong with it
i said great
oh yeah i can tell you really love it
well what am i supposed to say
i ca n't wait to live in some depressing shit hole in the middle of nowhere
there 's something wrong with every single place we look at
why do n't you just come right out and tell me you do n't want to move in with me
because you 'll freak out and act like a total psycho about it
you 're the psycho
you have n't been able to deal with anything since high school ended
you 're the one who 's still living out some stupid seventh grade fantasy
fuck you
have fun living with your dad for the rest of your life
hello
i need to talk to you
i 'm sorry about the other day
i do n't know what 's wrong with me
i really do want to move in with you
i do n't know
i was thinking maybe i should live alone
i decided to rent that place we looked at
i 'm moving in next week
please let me come with you
please please please
i do n't know i 'm not sure it 's a good idea
of course it 's a good idea
it 's our plan
but how are you gon na pay rent and everything
you do n't even have a job
i 'll get a job tomorrow i promise
if i do n't you can totally tell me to fuck off
so whaddya think
it 's fine
so where 's all your stuff
do you want anything
maybe an orange juice
wow
finally
it just came yesterday
what about me
am i not even here
oh hey enid
so
we finally made it
we 're not
really
both of you
why not
just because
what are you going to be when you grow up todd
well i 'm going to major in business administration and i think minor in communications
see that 's exactly the kind of thing we 're trying to avoid
oh my god you guys
i ca n't believe we made it
yeah we graduated high school -- how totally amazing
so what are you guys doing this summer
nothing
i 'm going to be in this actor 's workshop and i 'm hoping to start going on auditions soon
i 'm so excited to finally have some free time
we have to get together this summer
oh yeah that 'll definitely happen
well bye you guys
congratulations
oh my god what are you guys doing here
what are you doing here melorra
my acting workshop is across the street from here
i 'm just on my break
well we wo n't keep you
i love this place
it 's so you know funky
it 's really quite something to see you all grown up like this enid
i 'd love to hear about what you 're doing
i ca n't help but feel that i had some small part in how you turned out
what are you studying
you were always such a smart little girl
i 'm taking a remedial high school art class for fuck ups and retards
perhaps the jam in ator appeals to you
absolutely no practice necessary
you shread like a giant
just press a button
that 's okay
do you have any other old records besides these
seymour does
who does
him
seymour
he 's the man with the records
you still interested in that
i thought it was n't for sale
i 'm thinkin maybe i could let it go
it 's kind of falling apart
do n't mind me i 'll just be in my room
where did you get those pants
did n't they tell you
tell me what
punk rock is over
i know it 's over asshole i --
if you really want to fuck up the system you should go to business school -- that 's what i 'm gon na do get a job at some big corporation and fuck things up from the inside
that 's not even --
yeah yeah yeah
do you have my money
oh how punk
that tape sucked by the way
i 'm so sorry if you were offended
go die asshole
get a job
hi
what 's your name
norman
... are you waiting for a bus
yes
i hate to tell you this but they cancelled this bus line two years ago
there are no buses on this street
you do n't know what you 're talking about
thanks for the tape i 'll have to pay you later i 'm broke
hey where are you going
later dude
that 's five hundred dollars
what
five hundred
you 're crazy -- it should be like two dollars
i was wearing that dress the day i lost my virginity
well why do i care about that
why do you even want it
it would look stupid on you
god fuck you
do you have any old indian records
indian records
you know like weird 1960 's indian rock n roll music
i do n't have anything after about 1935
i may have one hindu 78 from the twenties in my collection but it 's not really for sale
i do n't really collect foreign
those are all 78s
can you play 78s
sure
wait maybe not 78s but i can play regular records
there 's some good stuff in here
do you like old music
sure i guess
well there 's a few choice lps in here that re issue some really great old blues stuff
is this one any good
nah it 's not so great
here 's the one i 'd recommend
this track alone by memphis minnie is worth about 500 if you have the original 78
she was one of the greatest guitar players that ever lived and a great singer and songwriter as well
i know the guy who owns the original and lent it for use on this reissue
wow
how much is it
a dollar seventy five
okay
what was all that stuff about enlarged holes and tight cracks
i
i did n't think you would have any interest in this get together
i mean if you had told me you were coming i would have warned you -- it 's not like a real party or anything
you 're right about that
so this is your record collection
oh god no
this is just junk i have for sale or trade
the record room is off limits
really
can i see it
yeah well sure
you can if you want to
it 's just i do n't want all these guys in there at once
you know
wow
this is like my dream room
are these all records
i have about fifteen hundred 78s at this point
i 've tried to pare down my collection to the essential
god look at this poster
i ca n't believe this room
you 're the luckiest guy in the world
i 'd kill to have stuff like this
please
go ahead and kill me
this stuff does n't make you happy believe me
oh come on
what are you talking about
you think it 's healthy to obsessively collect things
you ca n't connect with other people so you fill your life with stuff
i 'm just like all the rest of these pathetic collector losers
no you 're not
you 're a cool guy seymour
yeah right
if i 'm so cool why have n't i had a girlfriend in four years
i ca n't even remember the last time a girl talked to me
i 'm talking to you
i 'll bet there are tons of women who would go out with you in a minute
oh right
no really
i guarantee i could get you a date in like two seconds
good luck
i 'm totally serious
yeah well
i mean it -- you leave everything to me -- i 'm going to be your own personal dating service
i appreciate the offer but you really do n't --
mark my words by the end of this summer you 'll be up to your neck in pussy
jesus
that 's very nice of you enid but i i really --
what about her
would you go out with her
i do n't know what kind of question is that
i mean it 's totally irrelevant because a girl like that would never be caught dead with me
but putting that aside for now would you go out with her
i really did n't get a good look at her
okay what about this one
are you into girls with big tits
jesus
c'mon seymour i 'm trying to collect data here
do n't you want me to find you your perfect dream girl
i 'm just not one of those guys who has a type
every guy has a type
i mean as long as she 's not a complete imbecile and she 's even remotely attractive
we need to narrow this down somehow
we need to find a place where you can meet women who share your interests
maybe i do n't want to meet someone who shares my interests
i hate my interests
where can i go to meet the exact opposite of myself
yeah yeah yeah
just tell me your five main interests in order of importance
well let 's see
i guess i 'd have to put traditional jazz blues and ragtime music at the top of the list then probably
let 's just say music that way you only use up one
wait we have to go in here for a second
so is that your boyfriend
josh
he 's nobody 's boyfriend
he 's just this guy that becky and i like to torture
well are --
oh my god
we have to go in here
yeah sure
very funny
please seymour
becky and i have been dying to go in here but we ca n't get any boys to take us
please
i i 'd really rather not
we 'll just go in for one minute -- it 'll be a riot
i do n't think so
please
we have to
i really do n't think it 's a good idea
fine i 'll go by myself then
uh i do n't have much money with me right now
c'mon seymour please
relax seymour relax
that thing is just so shrill and piercing and loud it 's like someone jabbing me in the face
kfto comin atchya on this beautiful evening
so why did you bring this along
i brought it for him to autograph
he 's going to be amazed to see it it 's one of two known copies
i ca n't believe they have him for the opening act and not the headliner
what an insult
this bar 's going to be packed with girls for you to pick from
i 'm not holding my breath in that department
what are we in slow motion here
what are ya hypnotized
have some more kids why do n't you
for christ 's sake would you move
jesus seymour
yes that would certainly do
well offer her a seat
you want me to do it
wait a minute
hang on
jesus i got ta think of something to talk to her about
no
no
just wait here
what did you tell that girl
i told her you were a big record executive and you were thinking of signing that band to your label
jesus
now i remember why i have n't gone anywhere in months
i 'm not even in the same universe as those creatures back there
i might as well be from another planet
we just need to figure out a place where you can meet somebody who is n't a total idiot that 's all
look i really appreciate your help enid but let 's face it this is hopeless
it 's not hopeless
yeah well it 's simple for everybody else give 'em a big mac and a pair of nikes and they 're happy
i just ca n't relate to 99.9 of humanity
yeah well i ca n't relate to humanity either but i do n't think it 's totally hopeless
but it 's not totally hopeless for you
i 've had it
i do n't even have the energy to try anymore
you should make sure you do the exact opposite of everything i do so you do n't end up like me
i 'd rather end up like you than those people at that stupid bar
at least you 're an interesting person
at least you 're not exactly like everybody else
hooray for me
i 'm not sure i have anything to drink
there might be some --
it does n't matter i 'm not staying long
i just want to make sure i convince you not to give up yet
yet
wow this is so cool
if you do n't mind my asking -- why do you care so much if i get a date or not
i dunno
because i ca n't stand the idea of a world where a guy like you ca n't get a date
so i do n't really get it -- are you saying that things were better back then even though there was stuff like this
no in a lot of ways things are better now
i dunno
it 's complicated
everybody still hates each other but they know how to hide it better or something
hey can i borrow this
what
why
i promise i 'll take good care of it
i dunno
they 're very sensitive at work about all this stuff
maybe it would be better if you --
do n't you trust me seymour
you can open your eyes now
oh
uh thanks a lot enid
i really appreciate it
no doofus
blow it out
arrrghhh
ah jeez
christ
are you okay
it 's just my stupid back
i 'll be all right in a minute
what is that
oh
uh
it 's just this elastic thing i have to wear for lumbar support
what like a girdle
maybe now you understand why i ca n't get a date
yeah well you 're not the only one
everybody i know has totally fucked up problems
it seems like only stupid people have good relationships
that 's the spirit
i mean i 'm eighteen years old and i 've never even had a real steady boyfriend for more than like two weeks
really
never
i 'm starting to think that even if i did get a girlfriend it really would n't change anything
i know
it 's not like it makes all your problems go away
then again that 's easy for me to say since i 'll never even get a date
i 'm sure you have hundreds of guys who are interested in you
actually i 've got a total crush on this one guy right now but it 's a really fucked up situation
oh yeah
oh wait you met him
remember that guy josh
i 'm like practically obsessed with him but i ca n't do anything about it because becky would freak out
why
never mind it 's way too complicated
did you have problems like this when you were my age where you 're totally confused all the time
i wo n't even dignify that with a response
i wonder if you really like all these old records or if you only like the fact that nobody else likes them
who knows
are n't you going to get that
let the machine get it
i have no desire to talk to anyone who would be calling me
wow
what was that all about
it 's just somebody 's idea of a joke
that did n't sound like a joke to me
what did you write a personal ad or something
uh yeah
a long time ago
she called before once
it 's just somebody trying to humiliate me
seymour
i promise you that was n't a joke -- you have to call her back
how can you be so sure
well uh
i 'm an expert about stuff like this -- she was totally for real
uh
hello
hi it 's me
oh hi
so what happened
actually it 's kind of still happening
she 's over here right now
i think everything 's going pretty well
what
you 're kidding me
yeah so i better go -- it 's not really the best time to talk
what are you going to like have sex with her on your first date
jesus enid
i 'll talk to you later
bye
we really should get together sometime soon
i i'll definitely call you this week --
what are you trying to get rid of me
no
no it 's just that i should get going in a few minutes and --
are n't you even going to ask me how i 'm doing
i i'm sorry
uh so
uh
how --
i dunno
okay i guess
i fucked that guy josh finally
... so
is he your boyfriend now
maybe
i dunno
he wants to be of course
i 'm weighing several offers at the present time
i 'm going to this stupid art show and i want you to be my date
there 's something i have to show you
i
i do n't know
i do n't really think i should
of course you should
c'mon i 'm already a million hours late
... i better not
well forget the art show
let 's do something else
i
i wish i could enid but i really ca n't right now
i -- it 's just that i --
well when can we do something
it 's just that well you know dana just got out of a really bad relationship and i do n't want to give her the wrong idea
you know
oh uh
they were a present from dana
and you like them
well you know
what do i know about clothes
i 've never been the most fashionable guy -- it 's nice to have someone do all the work for me
so that 's it
you do n't ever want to see me again
no of course i do
it 's just that right now i need to --
what 's her problem anyway
did she actually tell you you could n't see me
no no
not exactly
she just does n't understand how i would know somebody like you
what does she mean by that somebody like me
just someone so young
you must have done something to make her think you like me
i
i do n't think so
does that mean you do n't like me
no of course not
so do you like me seymour
in what way do you mean
in whatever way you think i mean
i do n't know
i 'm sorry but dana 's a very jealous person
i just do n't want to screw that up right now
i 'm sure she 'll dump me soon and we can go back to being friends
i do n't think you understand how i really feel about you seymour
... what do you mean
nothing
do n't worry i wo n't bother you any more
what are you doing here
i had to see you
what 's up
can you at least let me in
uh
sure
come in
look i just need somebody to be nice to me for five minutes and then i 'll leave you alone
what 's the matter
do you have anything to drink
uh
i think there 's some root beer
what about this
that 's dana 's i 'm supposed to be saving it for our two month anniversary
you better not --
fuck dana
i 'm sick of dana
you need a bigger place this is like a little kid 's room
i could never move i 've got too much stuff
where did you get this
dana bought it when we went antique shopping
she said it did n't go with her stuff so she gave it to me
she thought it fit in better with my old time thingamajigs
jesus how can you stand her
god dana 's going to kill you
... do you really want us to drive away somewhere
what
maybe
no
i dunno
i will if you want to
no
forget it
i i never expected anything like this to happen
yeah well
me neither
you must know i always
did you really mean all that about moving in with me
i was just thinking out loud
i mean you 've got this whole thing with dana -- i 'm not going to let you fuck that up
but i
shhh
i really need to get some sleep
i really want to talk to you
i 've been thinking about what you said about moving in here
i can treat him any way i want to i 'm an adult
leave me alone
so what 's the story with the two cheerleaders over here
they 're seymour 's
seymour
you got ta be kidding me
do n't worry about it
he 's not gettin any and neither are you
let me tell ya somethin' joe
listen to me joe
you ca n't hit a home run without swinging the bat
right
well here 's where the fun never stops
yeah i 'm really really happy
really having a good time
still torturing yourself over that enid huh
where else am i ever going to find another girl who likes geeshie wiley records
she could at least have the decency to call me back
maybe she was just using you to try and get back at some guy
who knows
it could be a million things
it 's wasted time trying to logically figure out the female brain that 's for sure
maybe she 's got another boyfriend
yeah well
thanks for cheering me up
no problem
please josh
forget it there 's no way
find some other poor sucker to abuse
so josh if this guy freaks out will you protect us
he has every reason to freak out -- this is a totally fucked up thing to do to somebody
i think that phillip and enid can help us to see that there are many different ways we can express ourselves
we can do things like these cartoons that are amusing as a sort of light entertainment or we can do work that is more serious in scope and feeling and that deals with issues emotional spiritual political of great importance
i hope that you will each have the tools to do that type of work by the end of this class
who is responsible for this
i am
talk to us about it
it 's my response to the issue of a woman 's right to choose
it 's something i feel super strongly about
is n't this a wonderful piece class
this definitely falls into that higher category of art i was speaking of earlier
what do we have here margaret
it 's a tampon in a teacup
i can see that
now what can you tell us about it
first of all what kind of sculpture is this
it 's a found object
that 's when an artist takes an ordinary object and places it in an artistic context and thus it becomes art
very good
now what can you tell us about it in regard to your artistic intent
i guess i see the teacup as a symbol for womanhood because of tea parties in the olden days but instead of tea i was trying to kind of confront people with this
like
this shocking image of repressed femininity
right exactly
i think it 's really a wonderful piece margaret
uh
hi
uh
enid 's stepmother told me i 'd find her here
she 's not at home
no
they said she was here
what the fuck is she doing
she was supposed to be here three hours ago
uh do you mind if i wait
i really need to talk to her
are you sure she was n't there
maybe she was just hiding from you
why would she be hiding from me
i do n't know
where is she then
maybe she 's with josh
josh
why would she be with josh
i do n't know
why
what did she tell you
she just mentioned him a few times and said that they had been dating i thought maybe she was
what
is she having some secret affair with josh
i have no idea i just want to
why would n't she tell me
there 's no way
she could never keep that to herself
you 're crazy
really i do n't know enough about it to
that slut
why did you say she might be hiding from me
did she say anything to you about me
yeah she thinks you 're a dork
did she say that
look what do you expect
considering how we met you
what do you mean
on that pathetic fake blind date
what are you talking about
did n't she ever tell you about that
god she really is pathological
what fake blind date
what are you talking about
i have to admit things have really started looking up for me since my life turned to shit
so tell me more about this job
what exactly will you be doing
well mostly archival research cataloguing old records and writing liner notes for their cd reissues
it 's really
i ca n't believe it
remember what i said when we first started -- this little breakdown might turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to you
it does n't pay very much but i should be able to afford my own place in a few months
do you think that 's too soon
i 'm really anxious to get my record collection out of storage
why do n't we start with that next week
thank you doctor
do n't thank me
you 're doing all the work
seymour
yes
do you have a check for me
you were contracted to work-
-malaria epidemic very sudden
let me see the sick
oh you 're a doctor now too
there is no reason for fear
on that i choose to remain dubious
two are dead now in two nights
morning friend glorious day
as are they all
the next time will be as this time- the devil has come to tsavo-
-that 's ridiculous talk and you ca n't seriously believe it-
-now you 're telling me my beliefs?- i do n't think so-
i was n't and you know it and do n't push it- just listen- we have a problem in tsavo-
-at last you 're right- we do- you are the problem in tsavo-
-careful abdullah-
no hints samuel
you do n't know all that has happened here- the devil has come to tsavo
you 're right
the devil has come
look at me
i am the devil
i am a man of peace
am i to take it you want to live
most certainly
absolutely
yes
excellent decision
your name is abdullah
i 'm sure we 'll meet again
go and enjoy the splendid morning
i think it 's been a pleasure
starting now we attack them
how we do n't know where they are
we 'll have to make them come to us wo n't we
and since there are two of them we 're going to set two plans in motion
first we must move the entire hospital by tomorrow night
john henry patterson come in
i 'm robert beaumont
firm- i like that tells me a lot about you- -now why do n't you tell me about me
to get you started many people find me handsome with a wonderful smile
i 'm sure you agree
winning personality heaps of charm
my wife is the game player in the family sir
games
look at me closely patterson i am a monster
my only pleasure is tormenting people who work for me such as yourself
one mistake and i promise you this i 'll make you hate me
-build the bridge over the tsavo river
and be finished in four months time
can you do that
i 'm sure you 've examined my record
so you know i 've never yet been late on a bridge
you 've never built in africa
but i have in india- every country presents problems
you 'll need your confidence i promise you
i 've got a reason far beyond confidence my wife is having our firstborn in five months and i promised i 'd be with her when the baby comes
very moving patterson i 'm touched you confided in me
but i do n't really give a shit about your upcoming litter
i 've made you with this assignment- -don't make me break you
you wo n't have the chance
any further words of encouragement
then i 've a train to catch
truthfully
there has been the occasional odd hiccup- but then as you so wisely told me i 'd never built in africa
but overall you 're pleased
i do need to see starling
starling
awhile back he ordered some bibles- -i've brought them
is he here
yes he is
well i need to speak to him
it 's what the natives are calling the lions- -two lions have been causing trouble-
-what 's the surprise in that this is africa
it has n't been that simple so far
what have they done besides kill starling
how many have they killed
this is supposed to be salvation
what kind of idiocy are we dealing with here
i 'm calling it my contraption"- we 're going to surround it with a boma- a fence to you- and we 're going to leave a small opening opposite that door
in that half will be bait- human bait- i 'll start things off- -a sliding door will fit above that and a trip wire will run across the floor
genius- the beast will enter tripping the wire the door will slide down trapping him you safe behind the bars will have him at your mercy and will shoot him
are you running a high fever man
how could you expect something as lunatic as this to succeed
how could you even conceive of it
i did n't conceive of it for the lions- i built one in india when there was trouble with a tiger
and it worked
in point of fact it did n't
but i 'm convinced the theory is sound
what
i made a mistake hiring you- you 're simply not up to the job
you genuinely enjoy trying to terrify people do n't you
well fine- -except there is n't a higher rated engineer and we both know that
and since time is so important to you how long do you think it would take to find someone else qualified and bring him here
let me explain about time- you 've been here three months and already two months behind
and the germans and the french are gearing up
and i do n't care about you and i do n't care about the thirty dead- i care about my knighthood and if this railroad finishes on schedule i 'll get my knighthood and i want it
professional hunters may be the answer
all they 'll bring is more chaos and we 've plenty of that already- and if they come in word will get out- and what happens to your knighthood then
i 'm going to try and locate redbeard- i assume you 've heard of him
every man who 's ever fired a rifle has heard of him- by the time you find him the lions will be dead
very well the job 's still yours i 'll go
but if i have to return you 're finished
and i will then do everything i can to destroy your reputation
am i not fair
told you you 'd hate me
i know it 's your first day and of course you must be tired from the journey- -but what are you going to do about it
karim will have to show me where it happened
and of course i 'll need the donkey
with any luck i 'll sort it out tonight
you 're certain about tomorrow
but you do n't seem excited
you do n't enjoy killing do you
then why do it
i 'm david hawthorne this is my hospital
and my advice to you is do n't get sick in front of it
that was meant to be charming sorry
i seem to have lost the knack
you never had it
nigel and i do n't like each other much
a man eater attacks and you 're such a buffoon you almost forget to mention it
well he got away did n't he
riding a donkey not far from here when the lion sprang on them- donkey took the brunt of it- then suddenly the lion ran off
-then he feasted on him starting with his feet-
-please- you need n't be so graphic-
you intend sorting this out tonight
that 's a terrible idea-
-is it i 'm sorry but then of course you 're the doctor you should know
silliest thing i ever heard of- why in the world should we go through all that
i suppose i could answer you
i suppose i could explain that the place is so inviting what with the smell of blood and flesh that they have to strike
it 's even possible that i tell you i found some fresh paw marks around back which means they 're already contemplating feasting here
but i do n't want to answer you because when you question me you are really saying that i do n't have the least idea what i am doing that i am nothing but an incompetent that i am a fool
anyone who finds me a fool please say so now
i have been desperate for patterson to let me move the hospital since the day he arrived
then we agree
i tried to be late john- it would have been easier if you 'd gone
we 're not much good at goodbyes helena
tell me about beaumont- does he understand how brilliant you are how lucky he is to have you
it was embarrassing- the man showered me with compliments
oh dear- -you're geting that downtrodden look again-
-well it 's just
other men do n't abandon their wives at such a time-
-oh please- if i 'd been against your taking this you would have abandoned me
you 've been desperate to see africa your whole life
what if there are complications?-
-not what if"- there will be there always are
which only means that our son and i- note my confidence- will have an excuse to come visit
not once?- you did n't hit it once?-
-i would never make excuses- but a fire broke out- the light was bad- he kept moving-
-well of course he kept moving- but he could n't have been more than ten feet away from the three of you- surely you must have wounded the thing-
i assure you we came close many times-
many thanks
you 're patterson yes
nigel starling- i 'll be assisting you at tsavo- but surely beaumont must have told you that
he just gave me his monster speech
that
i know robert seems dreadful but when you truly get to know the man well he 's much worse
and i 'm one of his defenders
forget him for now- it 's your first ride to tsavo- i think you 'll find it breathtaking
do n't much like them
the females are bigger- only animal here like that- have to be or they would n't survive because the males eat the young
anything special about them
just that they fart through their mouths
must make kissing something of a gamble
i 've lived in africa a year and i do n't know what you know
how long have you been here
almost three hours
but i 've been getting ready all my life
every time i see something like that i know we 're right to be here- to bring christianity into their lives enrich their souls
beaumont says it 's to end slavery
we all have our reasons
mine is simply to make them understand happiness accept salvation know the serenity that comes- -best i stop
one of the by products of my belief is that i can become amazingly boring
but i know god smiles on me
have you got that in writing
samuel is camp liaison- absolutely indispensable- the only man here everyone trusts
does he speak english
excellent
could i see the bridge site
i 've got medical supplies to deliver
come along to the hospital when you 're done
finish your tour
and anxious to get started
what is this mostly malaria
yes- but their suffering is only transitory- once they except god into their hearts he will vanquish all pain
i do n't suppose i could watch
might be exciting for you
i 've never been all that adventurous
i would n't be in the way
i 'd love the company
and i 've hunted all my life
well why not
you seem so calm and experienced
why not indeed
i hate to be a bother john but the cramp 's getting worse
the pain is actually quite unbearable now
shhh
i 'm sure you mean that to be comforting but-
-you'll have to deal with it nigel
that is precisely my plan- but back in my tent
john
i know this is n't the time to ask but-
what
since you 'd only been here three hours when we met are you sure this is how you hunt lions
not to terrify you nigel but it 's worse than you think- i 've never even seen one
... one shot
so that 's what a lion looks like
with much more on the way- -john- we could have had this chat on flatter ground-
-true enough- but without the comedy relief
how lucky we are
are n't we full of ourselves today
i think it 's because of the lion
possibly
all right- thee second embankment will go there
you do plan to mark it a bit more precisely than just- -"there
in your honor nigel
and you and singh will be in charge of building them- and you 'll also build the roadbeds and the three foundation pillars- and you 'll be finished in eight thrilling weeks
john it will not be easy
nigel you 'll just have to use your hands-
i 'll try- but this feels so different- that old lion i killed could never carry off a man singh 's size
but you said they were always old
that 's what the books say
i did n't have a chance to thank you
what did i do
got me out of trouble
nonsense- samuel would have done something
we need to talk
let me save time- you are the engineer you are in charge you 're sorry i 'm here
right so far
good- because i am not an engineer i do n't want to be in charge and i 'm sorrier than you are that i 'm here- i hate tsavo
so i will help you by killing the lions and leaving and you will help me by doing what i tell you so i can leave
see any problems
actually no
all right- let 's go into battle
i 'm redbeard
somehow i guessed
i do n't really
but understand something- even though it may take me two or three days to sort this out- -when i 'm gone you 'll still have to build the bridge
and i do n't want the men to have lost respect for you
that 's very considerate
i 'm always considerate- my mother taught me that
have you got it
no but you do- -see you were needed after all
and fifty warriors at the camp before dawn
the best way to ensure the kill when you 're using trackers is for one to shoot while the other uses the trackers to force the lion toward the shooter
have you ever led trackers
i can try
samuel says you killed a lion
it was probably luck- i 'd rather you did the shooting
you 'd never force the lion to me- and nobody ever got a lion with one shot by luck
around there 's a clearing- you 'll know it from the anthills- get there and hide and listen to the sounds- i 'll make the lion come directly to you
... misfire
it jammed
has it ever done that before
... do n't know
think about something else
have you ever failed
only in life
goddammit
it 's all right
stay ready
they know it 's there
meant to ask you- the railroad car trap
your idea
excellent notion- i used the same device myself once
but of course yours worked
in point of fact it didn't- but i 'm convinced the idea is sound
their den
have you ever seen anything like this
nobody 's seen anything like this
lions do n't have caves like this- -they're doing it for pleasure
where could it have gone
how could it get across the water
they 're only lions yes
do n't they have to be
they 're used to people in trees not in a clearing
it may be tight
not for me- i 'm too bulky and it 's your idea you go up there
take the others to the water tower for the night
i 'll be bait alone
yes
and i 'll be in some distant tree where i can provide no assistance whatsoever
can you control your fear
i 'll have to
i ca n't control mine- i 'd be lost without the shame factor driving me
was that supposed to make me feel better
it 's certainly the best chance they 've had to kill you
you think they 'll come then
why
good luck
why
because i think they 're after you
how many do you think they 've killed
the most of any lions
a hundred
probably more
johnny
i never thought i 'd say this but i 'm glad you came
understood- you realize now you could never have done it without me
actually i could have done it much more easily without you but for whatever reason i 'm glad you came
why do the workers look unhappy
because they are here
because tsavo is the worst place in the world
come john- to the bridge
it 's all wonderfully under control samuel- you 've done a splendid job
thank you
the truth is this you have to work at it constantly
the workers do n't get on
get on
they detest each other
obviously the africans hate the indians
but the indians also hate the other indians
some of them worship cows while others eat them
what are they looking at
you- they can not believe you 're still here
nonsense
you do n't know what tsavo means do you
it means slaughter
we should construct thorn fences around every tent area
fires burning at night
fine
get started
and a strict curfew- no one allowed out at night
send half your men to the bridge the rest with these two
and i 'm sorry for my tone earlier
but i repeat- there is no reason for fear
i will kill the lion and i will build the bridge
oh yes i think so
look out samuel here it comes
for you
thank you samuel
good news
i expect so- it 's from my wife
do you love her
i do actually very much
you give me hope john
soon
i have to ask- why do you need me
you like him do n't you
oh yes
but it takes time
you 've known him long
since his beard was red
thank you
why does he need you by him
he does n't
he needs nobody
but we have hunted many times
he knows i am afraid of lions
three years i 've worked for the railroad
now i do n't know why
it seemed a good idea once
i feel the same about the bridge
this country certainly did n't ask for it does n't need it
afraid of lions
it 's all right samuel- we all get hit-
why do you laugh?- you do n't believe she taught me
i do n't believe you had a mother
how many cattle
four should do it
they will want a lot of money
why so many
because i have two plans to kill the lions- one involving the cattle the other the men
did you ever see a lion that size
not even close
what happened
gentlemen there 's no sickness smell at all here and little blood
when we leave close the gate securely do n't open it til morning and keep your fires high
any questions ask them now
you two will sleep beautifully in your tents
and stay there
and where will you sleep beautifully
patterson and i will be in the old hospital- where the enticing smell of sickness still lingers- -and by the time we 're done i promise you the odor of blood will be irresistible
where do you go next
some russian princes want to hunt the himalayas
you
help finish the railroad
my life was shaped because someone invented gunpowder
our lives have crossed because two lions went mad
but what if in the future the three of us do something grand for humanity
was that worth all the lives
too soon to tell
some mysteries should not have solutions
hold your son high
every day i ask you and every day you 've got something else to do
do i have bad breath or something
i 'm sorry
perhaps some other time
okay i 'll take a raincheck on that
janosz
hello dana
i happened to be in the neighborhood and i thought i 'd stop by to see if everything 's all right with you -- you know with the blackout and everything
are you okay
is the baby all right
do you need anything
you want me to come in
no everything 's fine
honestly
thanks anyway
okay just thought i 'd check
good night dana
sleep well
do n't let the bedbugs bite you
good night janosz
dana are n't you going to introduce me to your friend
oh i 'm sorry
this is peter venkman
peter janosz poha
what do you want with my baby
no harm will come to the child
you might even say it 's a privilege
he will be the vessel for the spirit of vigo
and you -- well you will be the mother of the ruler of the world
does n't that sound nice
if this is what the world will be like i do n't want to live in it
i do n't believe we have the luxury of choice
everybody has a choice
not in this case my dear
take a look
that 's not gainsborough 's blue boy up there
he 's vigo
i do n't care who he is
he 's not taking my baby
time is running out dana
soon it will be midnight and the city will be mine -- and vigo 's
well mainly vigo 's
but we have a spectacular opportunity to make the best of our relationship
we do n't have a relationship
i know
marry me dana and together we will raise vigo as our son
there are many perks that come with being the mother of a living god
i 'm sure he will supply for us a magnificent apartment
and perhaps a car and free parking
i hate and despise you and everything you stand for with all my heart and soul
i could never forgive what you 've done to me and my child
many marriages begin with a certain amount of distance but after a while i believe we could learn to love each other
think about it
i 'd rather not
hundreds of people
believe me i did n't imagine this
i 'm not saying you did
in science we always look for the simplest explanation
what are you working on egon
i 'm trying to determine whether human emotional states have a measurable effect on the psychomagnetheric energy field
it 's a theory ray and i were working on when we had to dissolve ghostbusters
frank do you think you could give me a hand with these bags
i 'm not a doorman miss barrett
i 'm a building superintendent
you 're also a human being frank
okay okay
it 's not my job but what the hell
i 'll do you a favor
he takes the grocery bags from her
thank you frank
i 'll get the hang of this eventually
hiya oscar
what do you say slugger
that 's a good looking kid you got there ms. barrett
thank you frank
oh are you ever going to fix the radiator in my bedroom
i asked you last week
did n't i do it
no you did n't frank
okay that 's no problem
that 's exactly what you said last week
hello peter
you know dana i 'm very very hurt that you did n't call me first
i 'm still into all this stuff you know
have n't you ever seen my show
i have
that 's why i did n't call you first
i can see that you 're still very bitter about us but in the interest of science i 'm going to give it my best shot
let 's go to work boys
so what happened to mr. right
i hear he ditched you and the kid and moved to europe
he did n't ditch me
we had some problems he got a good offer from an orchestra in england and he took it
he ditched you
you should 've married me you know
you never asked me and every time i brought it up you 'd get drowsy and fall asleep
men are very sensitive you know
we need to feel loved and desired too
well when you started introducing me as the old ball and chain that 's when i left
i may have a few personal problems but one thing i am is a total professional
what do you think
there 's no doubt about it
he 's got his father 's looks
the kid is ugly -- extremely ugly
and smelly
you stink
it 's just horrible
you are the stinkiest baby i ever smelled
what 's his name
his name is oscar
oscar
you poor kid
peter this is serious
i need to know if you think there 's anything unusual about him
unusual
i do n't know
i have n't had a lot of experience with babies
i 'll do it
i 'll supervise
brings back a lot of sweet memories does n't it
there 's our old cash machine
and the dry cleaners we used to go to
and the old video store
we really had some good times did n't we
we definitely had a moment or two
so this is what you do huh
oh hello peter
you 're really good you know
i did n't paint it
i 'm just cleaning it
it 's an original ver meer
it 's worth about ten million dollars
i 'm sure you did n't come here just to talk about art
as a matter of fact i stopped by to tell you that i have n't forgotten your problem and that we 're still on the case
he was also a lunatic and a genocidal madman
i hate this painting
i 've felt very uncomfortable since they brought it up from storage
yeah it 's not the kind of thing you 'd want to hang in the rec room
you know what it needs
a fluffy little white kitten in the corner
i may be wrong but i think you 've got a little crush on this guy
good bye peter
i 'd like to stay but i really do n't have time to hang around here
i 'll call you
later johnny
i 'm sorry
were you on your way out
no i just got in -- a couple hours ago
come on in
are we having a pajama party
peter the bathtub tried to eat oscar
you know if anyone else told me that i 'd have serious doubts
but coming from you i ca n't honestly say i 'm surprised
i must be losing my mind
at the museum today i could have sworn that terrible painting of vigo looked right at me
who could blame him
were you wearing this nightgown
i do n't know what to do anymore
i 'll get ray and egon to check out the bathtub
you better stay here
this is joe namath 's old number you know
you could get a lot of chicks with this
just do n't pee in it
peter what about the bathtub
we 'll take care of that
ray pete
listen get over to dana 's right away
her bathtub pulled a fast one -- tried to eat the kid
it was full of this awful pink ooze
sounds like another slime job
no they 're all right
they 're here now
right
let me know
bathroom 's right here -- let me just tidy up a few things
peter this is very nice but you do n't have to do any of this you know
they did n't find anything
in the bathtub
the pink ooze
nothing
so what do i do now
now you get dressed and we go out
i got a babysitter and everything
trust me you need it
i 'm not here to date
i ca n't leave oscar in a strange place with someone i do n't know
it 's janine melnitz from my staff
she 's one of my most valuable employees
does she know anything about babies
janine melnitz are you kidding
do i have a vase
i brought some of your clothes
wear something intriguing
i brought along some interesting possibilities
okay but it 's not a date
it 's a dinner
did you happen to see some shirts on the floor in here
i put them in your hamper
i thought they were dirty
i have a hamper
next time ask me first okay
i have more than two grades of laundry
there 're lots of subtle levels between clean and dirty
so -- are you making any new year 's resolutions
i want to stop getting involved with men who are n't good for me
does that start exactly at midnight tomorrow or could you hold off for a few days maybe
for one night in your life do you think it 's possible for us to be completely real
all right you want to be real
so tell me why did you dump me
oh peter i did n't dump you
i just had to protect myself
you really were n't very good for me you know
i 'm not even good for me
why do you say things like that
you 're so much better than you know
thank you
if i had that kind of support on a daily basis i could definitely shape up by the turn of the century
so why do n't you give me a jingle in the year 2000
let me jingle you right now
maybe i should call janine
do n't worry
janine has a very special way with children
i think he likes you
i think i do too
finally came to your senses huh
that 's not true
it was 1620
same difference
that 's a terrible thing to say
so what
it 's a free country
thanks lib
hi ray
it 's good to see you
thanks for coming
no problem
always glad to help -- and hug
hi egon
sorry
maybe we should discuss this somewhere else
according to my sources the world will end on february 14 in the year 2016
valentine 's day
that 's got to be a bummer
where did you get that date elaine
i received this information from an alien
i was at the paramus holiday inn i was having a drink in the bar when he approached me and started talking
then he must have used some sort of ray or a mind control device because he made me follow him to his room and that 's where he told me about the end of the world
your alien had a room in the holiday inn
it may have been a room on the spacecraft made up to look like a room in the holiday inn
i ca n't be sure peter
no you ca n't and i think that 's the whole problem with aliens you just ca n't trust them
you may get some nice ones occasionally like starman or e.t. but most of them turn out to be some kind of lizard
anyway we 're just about out of time
next week on world of the psychic hairless pets
until then this is peter venkman saying
good night
can i help you
yeah you can get your hand off my chest
i 'm jack hardemeyer
i 'm the mayor 's assistant
what can i do for you
i 'm an old friend of the mayor 's
i just want to say hello to him
i know who you are doctor venkman
busting any ghosts lately
no that 's what i want to talk to the mayor about
we did a little job for the city a while back and we ended up getting sued screwed and tattooed by deskworms like you
look you stay away from the mayor
next fall barring a disaster he 's going to be elected governor of this state and the last thing we need is for him to be associated with two bit frauds and publicity hounds like you and your friends
you read me
that 's quite a story
yeah i think the times might be interested do n't you
the post might have a lot of fun with it too
before you go running to the newspapers with this would you consider telling this slime thing to some people downtown
now you 're talking
look i 've had it with you
get your stuff together get back in that clown car and get out of here
this is a city matter and everything 's under control
oh you think so
well i 've got news for you
you 've got dracula 's brother in law in there and he 's got my girlfriend and her kid
around about midnight tonight when you 're partying uptown this guy 's going to come to life and start doing amateur head transplants
and that 's just round one
what is it honey
it 's that darn ghost again
i do n't know what to do anymore
he just wo n't leave us alone
i guess we 'll just have to move
do n't worry
we 're not moving
he is
have you made any plans yet
you know tomorrow is new year 's eve
no i celebrate at the beginning of my corporate tax year which is march first
that way i beat the crowds
that 's very practical
i hate going out on new year 's eve too
well good night louis
janine do you feel like maybe getting something to eat on the way home
i 'd like to but i told dr. venkman i 'd babysit
do you want to babysit with me
oh sure that sounds great
i ca n't believe a person could actually live like this
so these dwarfs had a limited partnership in a small mining operation and then one day a beautiful princess came to live with them
it 's really not a bad place
it just needs a woman 's touch
so they bartered room and board in exchange for housekeeping services which was a good deal for all of them because then they did n't have to withhold tax and social security which i 'm not saying is right but it 's just a story so i guess it 's all right
i can finish this later if you 're tired
you 're really good with children louis
i can tell
why do n't you come here and sit with me
okay
motherhood is a very natural instinct for me
i 'd like to have a baby myself
would n't you
tonight
should we go
i do n't think we should leave her alone
you 're right
we should stay
i 'm not sure this is such a good idea
do they know you 're doing this
oh yeah sure -- no
but there 's really not much to do here and they might need some back up at the museum
you 're very brave louis
good luck
pleasure to meet you
i 've seen you on television
how are you
what 's that you 're working on johnny
i 'll let you get back to it
nice meeting you
my pleasure
dr. venkman
dana is not here
i know
then why have you come
we got a major creep alert and we 're just going down the list
your name was first
you know i never got to ask you
where you from johnny
the upper west side
this is the one that looked at dana
it must be the chemical fumes in the studio
people start imagining things --
i 'm going to rule out the glue sniffing theory
if she says it looked at her it looked at her
hey you
vigie
look at me
i 'm talking to you
hey
look at me when i 'm talking to you
so you see everything is in order is it not
not
do n't leave town and report any change in your address to the proper authorities
we 'll be back
you pitiful miserable creatures
you dare to challenge the power of darkness
do n't you realize what you are dealing with
he 's vigo
you are like the buzzing of flies to him
oh johnny
did you back the wrong horse
i vigo the scourge of carpathia the sorrow of moldavia command you
command me lord
on a mountain of skulls in a castle of pain i sat on a throne of blood
what was will be what is will be no more
now is the season of evil
find me a child that i might live again
i vigo the scourge of carpathia --
yes the scourge --
-- the sorrow of moldavia --
-- the sorrow --
i command you
i await the word of vigo
the season of evil begins with the birth of the new year
bring me the child that i might live again
lord vigo the mother dana is fine and strong
i was wondering -- well would it be possible -- if i bring the baby could i have the woman
so be it
on this the day of darkness she will be ours wife to you and mother to me
these boys are n't playing around
you 've got to stop them
please
the witness is leading him
sustained
okay let me rephrase that question
did n't you once coach a basketball team for underprivileged children
sustained
mr. tully do you have anything to ask this witness that may have some bearing on this case
do i
your honor may i approach the bench
yes
can i have some of your water
get on with it counselor
your honor ladies and gentlemen of the -- audience
i do n't think it 's fair to call my clients frauds
okay the blackout was a big problem for everybody
i was stuck in an elevator for about three hours and i had to go to the bathroom the whole time but i do n't blame them because once i turned into a dog and they helped me
thank you
that 's it
that 's all you have to say
did i forget something
come on sherm
you 're my cousin
do this for me
i 'm begging you
i ca n't do it louis
it is n't ethical
i could lose my license
why ca n't you just have them released
you 're a doctor
i 'm a dermatologist
i ca n't write orders on the psych ward
sherman i 've done lots of favors for you
like what
i got you out of those bad tax shelters
you were the one who got me in
i fixed you up with diane troxler and she put out did n't she
yeah i had to give her free dermabrasion for a year
forget it louis
i could get in a lot of trouble
i 'm telling you we 're all going to be in big trouble if we do n't do something fast
that ghost guy came and took my friend 's baby and we got to get it back
it 's just a scared little baby sherm
then you should go to the police
i do n't believe in any of that stuff
this is my cousin sherman
sherm say hello to the ghostbusters
i promised him a ride in the car if he got you out
hi it 's really great to meet you guys
i know this sounds weird but once i had a dream that my grandfather was standing at the foot of my bed but i knew it was impossible because he died and he started to tell me that --
yes i did
we were city champs
objection
irrelevant and immaterial
so dr. venkman please explain to the court why it is you and your co defendants took it upon yourselves to dig a big hole in the middle of the street
seventy seventh and first avenue has so many holes already we did n't think anyone would notice
i 'll ask you again dr. venkman
why were you digging the hole
and please remember that you 're under oath
i had my fingers crossed when they swore me in but i 'm going to tell you the truth
there are things in this world that go way beyond human understanding things that ca n't be explained and that most people do n't want to know about anyway
that 's where we come in
so what are you saying
that the world of the supernatural is your special province
no i guess i 'm just saying that shit happens and somebody has to deal with it
egon
hello venkman
how 've you been
how 's teaching
i bet those science chicks really dig that big cranium of yours huh
i think they 're more interested in my epididymis
i do n't even want to know where that is
i 'd like to have a stool specimen
yeah you would
is that for personal or professional reasons
what now brainiac
i think we should see if we can find anything abnormal on the street
finding something abnormal on the street should n't be too hard
that 's a thousand million electron volts
i knew that
you were supposed to help me with this
you need the exercise
you know animals and lower life forms often anticipate major disasters
given the new magnetheric readings we could see a tremendous breeding surge in the cockroach population
roach breeding
sounds better and better
dana
the boys are going down under the sewers tonight to look for slime
egon thinks there might even be some kind of big roach breeding surge
should we forget about dinner and go with them instead
boys listen
you 're scaring the straights
let 's save this until tomorrow okay
this wo n't wait until tomorrow venkman
it 's hot and it 's ready to pop
it 's working
the positive gev 's are climbing
they love you lib
keep it up
so far so good
i 'm worried
the vibrations could shake her to pieces
we should have padded her feet
pretty impressive huh
it 's probably the first thing my grandparents saw when they came to this country
from where -- neptune
they came from ostrov in eastern poland
ostrov
i 've been there
good party town
who was that
some crank
looking for goat hooves
come up with anything
this one 's interesting
berlin 1939 a flower cart took off by itself and rolled approximately half a kilometer over level ground
three hundred eyewitnesses
you might want to check those duke university mean averaging studies on controlled psychokinesis
good idea
nothing
not a trace
why do n't we try the giga meter
the new york pneumatic railway
it was an experimental subway system
fan forced air trains built around 1870
this is about as deep as you can go under manhattan without digging your own hole
what 's the reading
i 'm egon --
and we 're the
no not exactly a man of the people
also known as vigo the cruel vigo the torturer vigo the despised and vigo the unholy
this guy was a bad monkey
he dabbled in all the black arts and listen to this prophecy
just before his head died his last words were death is but a door time is but a window
i 'll be back
six feet -- seven -- eight --
that 's it
it 's on the bottom
nine feet -- ten --
if you two are looking for a fight you got one
who wants it first
come on ray
try me sucker
butt out you pencil necked geek
i 've had it with you
it wo n't work
there 's no way we could generate enough positive energy to crack that shell
i ca n't believe things have gotten so bad in this city that there 's no way back
sure it 's crowded it 's dirty it 's noisy
and there are too many people who 'd just as soon step on your face as look at you
but there 've got to be a few sparks of sweet humanity left in this burned out burg
we just have to mobilize it
we need something that everyone can get behind a symbol --
something that appeals to the best in each and every one of us --
something good --
do n't shoot
you 'll hit ray
do it
just do it
we 've found it at every event site we 've been to lately
you mean this stuff actually feeds on bad vibes
rivers of the stuff
and it 's all flowing toward the museum
late renaissance i think
caravaggio or brunelleschi
there 's something very familiar about this painting
oh hello perhaps you could help me
i 'm looking for an aerosol love potion i could spray on a certain penthouse pet that would make her unconditionally submit to an unusual personal request
oh hiya pete
so no goat hooves huh
i knew that voice sounded familiar
what 's up
how 's it going
nowhere -- fast
why do n't you lock up and buy me a sub
uh i ca n't
i 'm kind of working on something
great
so what are you guys working on
oh just checking something for an old friend
who
who
just -- someone we know
oh ray --
who
who
who
aaah
nobody
i ca n't tell you
who ray
dana
dana barrett
well holmes what do you think
it 's an interesting one pete
if anything was going on it 's totally subdued now
what 's that
egon and i have been working on a gauge to measure psychomagnetheric energy in gevs giga electron volts
i love this
we 're onto something really big
i can smell it ray
we 're going to make some headlines with this one
hey hey hey stresshound
are you nuts
if anybody found out about this we 'd be in serious trouble
the judge could n't have been clearer no ghostbusting
relax
we 're going to keep this whole thing nice and quiet low key no profile
careful winston
he 's a mean one
and to celebrate our grand reopening we 're giving you twice the value with our special half price welcome back service plan
hold on ray
half price
have you gone crazy
i guess so pete because that 's not all
tell them what else we 've got egon
you know he ran that last lap in under six minutes
if he was n't dead he 'd be an olympic prospect
oh good you 're here
spengler and i have something really amazing to show you
it 's not that thing you do with your nostrils is it
and now you 're going to eat it
no i 'm just restoring it to its normal state
this is what you do with your spare time
this is an incredible breakthrough venkman
a psychoreactive substance
whatever this is it clearly responds to human emotional states
mood slime
we ought to bottle this stuff and sell it
like a goat on garbage
we 're running tests to see if we can get an equally strong positive reaction
what kind of tests
well we sing to it we talk to it we say supportive nurturing things --
you 're not sleeping with this stuff are you
did you find anything at dana 's
nothing
just some mood slime residue in and around the bathtub
but we did turn up some interesting stuff on this vigo character you mentioned
i found the name vigo the carpathian in leon zundinger 's magicians martyrs and madmen
listen to this
beautiful beautiful
work with me baby
just have fun with it
okay he 's playing it cool
let 's finish up and get out of here
i 'll get one more reading
i think we 're going to have to pass on the sewer trip boys
let me know what you find out
okay but you 're missing all the fun
you should 've been there venkman
absolutely incredible
yeah sorry i missed it
i guess you guys did n't know about the dress code here
it 's really kind of a coat and tie place
it 's all over the city pete -- well under it actually
it looks like a giant jello mold
i hate jello
forget it
the vienna boys choir could n't get through this stuff
good effort
now what
should we say supportive nurturing things to it ray
i hope we have enough stuff to do the job
only one way to find out
ready teddy
i 'll keep to the middle of the channel
we 're okay to 59th street then we 'll go ashore and take first avenue to 79th
are you kidding
we 'll hit all that bridge traffic at 59th
i 'm going to take 72nd straight up to fifth
trust me i used to drive a cab
i do n't think they make nikes in her size
we 're almost there lib
step on it
my fault
she 's new in town
my great grandparents were swiss
i still have the pictures they took of the statue from the boat when they arrived
oh right you told me that
they came to america seeking other kinds of cheese as i recall
how about you winston
what 's your story pete
me
i 'm a little of everything
some irish some german some french dutch -- the women in my family slept around
and that 's what made this country great
ready
i 'm ready
then let 's do it
that 's it ray
i 've had it
no more parties
i 'm tired of taking abuse from over privileged nine year olds
come on winston
we ca n't quit now
the holidays are coming up
it 's our best season
give it up ray
you 're living in the past
ghostbusters does n't exist anymore
in a year these kids wo n't even remember who we are
ungrateful little yuppie larvae
after all we did for this city
yeah what did we do ray
the last real job we had we bubbled up a hundred foot marshmallow man and blew the top three floors off an uptown highrise
yeah but what a ride
you ca n't make a hamburger without chopping up a cow
does it have any favorites
it likes all the sappy stuff cumbaya everything is beautiful it 's a small world -- but it loves jackie wilson
and he did n't die of old age either
he was poisoned stabbed shot hung stretched disemboweled drawn and quartered
i guess he was n't too popular at the end there
you got a flux and a half
now if you do n't want to be the -- -- fifth person ever to die in meta shock from a planar rift i suggest you get down behind that desk and do n't move until we give you the signal stabilize -- all clear
are you all right
yeah i guess so
it was the strangest thing
i knew what i was doing but i could n't stop
this really terrible feeling came over me and -- i do n't know -- i just felt like driving into that tree and ending it all
whew
sorry boys
nice going ray
what were you trying to do -- drown me
look zeddemore it was n't my fault you were too stupid to drop that line
you better watch your mouth man or i 'll punch your lights out
oh yeah
anytime anytime
just go ahead and try it
what are we doing
ray i was ready to kill you
do n't you see
it 's the slime
that stuff is like pure concentrated evil
she 's moving
i 've lived in new york all my life and i never visited the statue of liberty
now i finally get here and we 're taking her out for a walk
ray -- ray -- how do you feel man
groovy
i 've never felt better in my life
i do n't care what you say
this could be a major christmas gift item
right and the first time someone gets mad their toaster will eat their hand
so we 'll put a warning on the label
tell him about the toaster
i do n't think he 's ready for the toaster
it better not start yet
i 'm trying to finish my potholder before lunch
you think all those predictions about the world coming to an end in the 1990s are true
how deep does it get
that water 's cold and i ca n't swim
it 's okay
i have my senior lifesaving card
my people were n't taking any pictures from those slave ships man
and there was n't any statue in charleston harbor to welcome them either
what are you dana
miss blue blood
her family 's been here since the year 12
are n't you glad we waited
i do n't know
it probably would 've been the same
well thanks a lot
roy
your clock broke
nice going honey
it was brand new
i did n't break your precious clock roy
now where are you going
to the bathroom where do you think
have i done the right thing
hey sweetheart will you cut that out
uuuuuuugh
what 's the matter dear
is it a star
it is a star
that 's great
you 're very good
ready
what is it
ummm -- figure eight
incredible
five for five
you 're not cheating on me here are you
no
they 're just coming to me
well you 're doing great
keep it up
oh dana it 's you
hi louis
... i thought it was the drug store
are you sick louis
oh no i feel great
i just ordered some more vitamins
i see you were exercising
so was i. i taped 20 minute workout and played it back at high speed so it only took ten minutes and i got a really good workout
you wanna have a mineral water with me
no thanks louis
i 'm really tired
i 've been rehearsing all morning
okay
i 'll take a raincheck
i always have plenty of mineral water and other nutritious health foods but you know that
listen that reminds me i 'm having a party for all my clients
it 's gon na be my fourth anniversary as an accountant
i know you fill out your own tax return but i 'd like you to come being that you 're my next door neighbor and all
oh that 's nice louis
i 'll stop by if i 'm around
you know you should n't leave your tv on so loud when you go out
that creep down the hall phoned the manager
i thought i turned it off
i guess i forgot
oh dana it 's you
hi louis
hey it 's crazy in here
you 're missing a classic party
well actually louis i have a friend coming by
great
bring her too
but you better hurry
i made nachos with non fat cheese and they 're almost gone
i 'll make some more though
fine louis
we 'll stop in for a drink
i got the twister game for later
are you the gatekeeper
i am zuul
oh sure
i 'm getting used to this
i 'm innocent
honest dana
i never touched you
not that i remember anyway
all right what happened to me
hello
i 'm peter venkman
may i help you
yes
well
i 'm not sure
what i have to say may sound a little
unusual
we 're all professionals here miss
barrett
dana barrett
... and then i opened the door again but it was gone
there was nothing there
so what do you think it was
why would anyone make up a thing like that
some people like the attention
some people are just crazy
have you ever thought of moving out -- at least until this disturbance blows over
no
if i moved out now i 'd be acknowledging that what happened was real
i 'm not ready to do that
you play the cello
it 's my favorite instrument
really
do you have a favorite piece
i 'd have to say prokofiev 's third concerto
that 's a violin concerto
yeah but it 's got a great cello break
you really do n't act like a scientist
no
what do i act like
like a used car salesman
thanks
what 's in there
that 's too bad
what
nothing
is that the kitchen
uh huh
well let 's check it out
i 'll wait here if you do n't mind
you 're quite a housekeeper
i told you i
i know
it happened by itself
damn
are you all right
yeah yeah
there 's nothing there now and i do n't get any significant readings
this is terrible
either there 's a monster in my kitchen or i 'm completely crazy
if it 's any comfort to you i do n't think you 're crazy
thanks
coming from you that really means a lot to me
i 'm a qualified psychologist
i 've got a degree and everything
i believe that something happened here and i want to do something about it
all right
what do you want to do
i think i should spend the night here
that 's it
get out
on a purely scientific basis
out
i want to help you
i 'll scream
do n't scream
then leave
okay okay
but if anything else happens you have to promise you 'll call me
all right
okay
then i 'll go
goodbye
no kiss
hey dana
what is it
what happened
i am zuul
i am the gatekeeper
we must prepare for the coming of gozer
okay i 'll help you
should we make some dip or something
he is the destructor
really
ca n't wait to meet him
as long as we 're waiting for him i 'd really like to try something with you -- in the bedroom
do you want this body
well i 'll just use it for a while and get it right back to you
take me now
actually it 's more of a policy than a rule
i want you inside me
i do n't know
you 've got two people in there already
it could get a little crowded
i want you to close your eyes and relax
now i 'm going to speak to dana and i want dana to answer
i am zuul
i am
right
you 're the gatekeeper
but i want dana
dana speak to me
there is no dana
i am zuul
whoa
nice voice
nothing
we just got rid of that thing in your kitchen
really
is it gone
yeah along with most of your furniture and a lot of your personal possessions
this one took some work
thank you
next time i want to break a lease i 'll know who to call
this is going to cost you you know
our fees are ridiculously high
talk to my accountant
i trust you 're moving us to a better space somewhere on campus
no we 're moving you off campus
the board of regents has decided to terminate your grant
you are to vacate these premises immediately
this is preposterous
i demand an explanation
fine
this university will no longer continue any funding of any kind for your group 's activities
but why
the students love us
dr. venkman we believe that the purpose of science is to serve mankind
you however seem to regard science as some kind of dodge or hustle
your theories are the worst kind of popular tripe your methods are sloppy and your conclusions are highly questionable
you 're a poor scientist dr. venkman and you have no place in this department or in this university
i see
that is one speedy mutt
he 's a big one
you do n't want to mess with that particular breed
definitely some sort of fighting spaniel i think
what 's that got to do with it
back off man
i 'm a scientist
did you see it
what was it
we 'll get back to you
you 're very handy i can tell
i bet you like to read a lot too
print is dead
that 's very fascinating to me
i read a lot myself
some people think i 'm too intellectual
but i think reading is a fabulous way to spend your spare time
i also play racketball
do you ever play
is that a game
it 's a great game
you should play sometime
i bet you 'd be good
you seem very athletic
do you have any hobbies
i collect spores molds and fungus
oh that 's very unusual
i think it 's the food of the future
remind me not to go to lunch with you
egon there 's something very strange about that man
i 'm very psychic usually and right now i have this terrible feeling that something awful is going to happen to you
i 'm afraid you 're going to die
die in what sense
in the physical sense
i do n't care
i see us as tiny parts of a vast organism like two bacteria living on a rotting speck of dust floating in an infinite void
that 's so romantic
i want you to have this
what is it
it 's a souvenir from the 1964 world 's fair at flushing meadow
it 's my lucky coin
i do n't believe in luck
keep it anyway
i have another one at home
thank you
why do n't you step into the office and we 'll talk about it
hold all my calls janine
what calls
here 's the paper on the brooklyn job
she paid with a visa card
here are tonight 's calls
and someone from the epa is here to see you
the epa
what 's he want
i did n't ask him
all i know is that i have n't had a break in two weeks and you promised you 'd hire more help
janine i 'm sure a woman with your qualifications would have no trouble finding a top flight job in the housekeeping or food service industry
oh really
well i 've quit better jobs than this one believe me
exactly what are you a doctor of mr. venkman
i have ph
d 's in psychology and parapsychology
i see
and now you catch ghosts
you could say that
and how many ghosts have you caught mr. venkman
i 'm not at liberty to say
and where do you put these ghosts once you catch them
in a storage facility
and would this storage facility be located on these premises
yes it would
and may i see this storage facility
no you may not
and why not mr. venkman
because you did n't say the magic word
and what is the magic word mr. venkman
the magic word is please
may i please see the storage facility
why do you want to see it
well because i 'm curious
i want to know more about what you do here
frankly there have been a lot of wild stories in the media and we want to assess any possible environmental impact from your operation
for instance the storage of noxious possibly hazardous waste materials in your basement
now either you show me what 's down there or i come back with a court order
go ahead
get a court order
then i 'm gon na sue your ass off for wrongful prosecution
have it your way mr. venkman
hey
make yourself useful
go save a tree
at ease officers
i 'm peter venkman
i think there 's been some kind of misunderstanding here and i want to cooperate in every way i can
forget it venkman
you had your chance to cooperate but you thought it was more fun to insult me
now it 's my turn smart ass
you turned off the power
look there was another man here
you have to find him and bring him back
a short determined looking guy with the eyes of a happy zombie
see
they are using drugs
the man is a psychopath your honor
probably a mixture of gases no doubt stolen from the army
mr. mayor it 's a pretty simple choice
you can believe mr. pecker here
that 's peck
... or you can accept the fact that this city is heading for a disaster of really biblical proportions
all right
what is it
a square
good guess -- but no
circle
close -- but definitely wrong
hey mister
can i see those guns
they 're not guns
they 're particle throwers
yeah yeah
i just want to see 'em
i could n't do that
you might hurt someone
wait
wait
let me ask you something
if you like shot superman with those guns would he feel it or what
on earth -- no
but on krypton we could slice him up like oscar mayer bologna
wow
yes
were you recently in the bathroom
what on earth gave you that idea
the wet towels residual moisture on your lower limbs and hair the redness in your cheeks indicating
you 're a regular sherlock holmes
now what do you want
when you were in the bathroom did you notice anything that was yellow and unusually smelly
oh
you 're here
what have you got egon
oh this is big peter
this is very big
there 's definitely something here
egon somehow this reminds me of the time you tried to drill a hole in your head
do you remember that
spengler are you serious about actually catching a ghost
i 'm always serious
wow
just for your information ray the interest payments alone for the first five years come to over 75,000
will you guys relax
we are on the threshold of establishing the indispensable defense science of the next decade professional paranormal investigations and eliminations
the franchise rights alone will make us wealthy beyond your wildest dreams
generally you do n't see that kind of behavior in a major appliance
what do you think egon
she 's telling the truth -- or at least she thinks she is
did you see anything
did n't see anything did n't get anything
nice girl no ghost
i 'm starting to worry
you said your graph was pointing to something big
you told me things were going to start popping
it 's peter egon
i 've got a problem
what is it
i 'm with dana barrett and she 's floating three feet off the bed
does she want to be
i do n't think so
it 's more of that gozer thing
she says she 's the gatekeeper
does that make any sense to you
some
i just met the keymaster
he 's here with me now
venkman
are you there
yeah yeah
i was just thinking
it probably would n't be a good idea for them to get together at this point
i agree
you have to keep him there
do whatever you have to but do n't let him leave he could be very dangerous
all right
i 'll try
i 'll spend the night here and get back first thing in the morning
all right peter
good night
he wants to shut down the storage grid
if you turn that thing off we wo n't be responsible for the consequences
where 's the keymaster
oh shit
of course
ivo shandor i saw his name in tobin 's spirit guide
he started a secret society in 1920
let me guess -- gozer worshippers
yes
after the first world war shandor decided that society was too sick to survive
and he was n't alone
he had close to a thousand followers when he died
they conducted rituals bizarre rituals intended to bring about the end of the world
she said he was the destructor
who
gozer
you talked to gozer
get a grip on yourself egon
i talked to dana barrett and she referred to gozer as the destructor
what now
full stream with strogon pulse
on the count of three
one
two
no
them
shoot them
cross the beams
no
you said crossing the beams would be bad
it 'll kill her
and us
life is just a state of mind
but it 's my favorite state
sorry buddy
we 'd better adjust our streams
ray
where are you
are you all right
god it 's ugly
it 's working
easy
easy
i 'm going to throw in my trap now
set entry grid
neutronize
system shut
i 've got to sleep
i need two new purge valves
how 's the grid around the storage facility holding up
i 'm worried ray
it 's getting crowded in there
and all my recent data points to something big on the bottom
what happened
the storage facility blew
this one
shut off the protection grid
look at the structure of the roof cap
it looks exactly like the kind of telemetry tracker nasa uses to identify dead pulsars in other galaxies
and look at this peter cold riveted girders with selenium cores
you mean if i stand here and concentrate on the image of roberto clemente gozer will appear as roberto clemente and wipe us out
that appears to be the case
what is it
it looks like a big pair of breasts and a pot belly
i told you it 's real
what do we do now
i do n't know
talk to it
what do i say
anything
just make contact
hey lady
lady
can you talk
who are you
this is not working
think of something else
okay
okay
i got it
i know what to do
stay close
i have a plan
get her
that was your whole plan
you call that science
i guess i got a little overexcited
was n't it incredible
i 'm telling you this is a first
you know what this could mean to the university
oh yeah
this could be bigger than the microchip
they 'll probably throw out the entire engineering department and turn their building over to us
we 're probably the first serious scientists to ever molest a dead old lady
if you guys are right if we can actually trap a ghost and hold it somehow i think i could win the nobel prize
if anyone deserves it it 's spengler and me
we 're doing all the hard research and designing the equipment
yeah but i introduced you guys
you never would 've met if not for me
that 's got to be worth something
you said you floored 'em at the regents meeting
ray i apologize
i guess my confidence in the regents was misplaced
they did this to galileo too
this is like a major disgrace
forget m.i.t. or stanford now
they would n't touch us with a three meter cattle prod
you 're always so worried about your reputation
we do n't need the university
einstein did his best stuff while he was working as a patent clerk.'they ca n't stop progress
do you know what a patent clerk makes
i liked the university
they gave us money they gave us the facilities and we did n't have to produce anything
i 've worked in the private sector
they expect results
you 've never been out of college
you do n't know what it 's like out there
let me tell you ray everything in life happens for a reason
call it fate call it luck karma whatever
i think we were destined to get kicked out of there
for what purpose
to go into business for ourselves
you 'll never regret this ray
my parents left me that house i was born there
you 're not going to lose the house
everybody has three mortgages these days
but at nineteen percent interest
you did n't even bargain with the guy
but most people are afraid to even report these things
maybe
but no one ever advertised before
why do n't i check out the building
it may have a history of psychic turbulence
good idea
were any other words spoken that you remember
how was your date
it was n't a date
it was an investigation
they will
do you know when that might be
we 're on the brink of a very serious cash flow problem
so do i.
no sense worrying about it now
sure
each of us is wearing an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on our back
no problem
i 'm getting high readings near the air vents
it must be using the duct system to get around
see i told you we 'd get something
so far all we got is a shit smell on the twelfth floor and we almost fried a puerto rican bellboy
all right
let 's cool the negative vibes
these things can sense them
ray -- something 's here
where are you pete
third floor
get down here
sit tight
i 'm on my way
well hurry up
the needle 's going wild
it 's here ray
it 's looking at me
do n't move
it wo n't hurt you
how do you know
i do n't know
i 'm just guessing
boy that was a rough one
i ca n't take much more of this
the pace is killing me
it does n't seem to have slowed him down any
i do n't think it 's shandor
as a duly constituted representative of the city of new york and on behalf of the county and state of new york the united states of america the planet earth and all its inhabitants i hereby order you to cease and desist any and all supernatural activity and return at once to your place of origin or next parallel dimension
well that ought to do it
agile bastard is n't he
forget the trapping
just blast him
i could n't help it
it just popped in there
what
what popped in there
look
and you came up with that
the stay puft marshmallow man
he was on all the packages we used to buy when i was a kid
we used to roast stay puft marshmallows at camp waconda
great
the marshmallows are about to get their revenge
very impressive resume
electronic countermeasures strategic air command
black belt in karate
small arms expert
mr. zeddemore as you may have heard we locate ghosts and spirits trap them with streams of concentrated quantum energy and remove them from people 's homes offices and places of worship
yeah i heard that
now tell me what you really do
hey man
what is it you 're so involved with there
uh
oh these are blueprints of the structural ironwork in dana barrett 's apartment building
and they 're most unusual
are you a christian ray
mmmhmmm
me too
boy
solid cores of shielded selenium
325
do you believe in god
no
but i liked jesus style
me too
parts of the bible are great
the whole roof cap was fabricated with a magnesium tungsten alloy
ray do you remember something in the bible about a day when the dead would rise up from their graves
and the seas would boil
right
and the sky would fall
judgement day
yeah judgement day
every ancient religion had its own myth about the end of the world
well has it ever occurred to you that the reason you 've been so busy lately is because the dead have been rising from their graves
you do n't have to worry about that with us sir
right
we 'll believe anything
where are we now commodus
can you see the camp
my gods
the air is turning into ice
we 're nearly there lucilla
that 's what you told me two days ago
will you please get back in your wagon
and stay there
i 'm tired of being stuck in that wagon
more wine sister
surely you can drink more than that
i was suddenly thinking about going to bed
oh stay
do n't you want to join the chorus of praises for narcissus glory
just remember he is a married man
quite so
narcissus and his courageous men may they live long to serve rome
and caesar
let 's not forget to serve caesar
do n't you think you should at least wave
why
then they 'll notice when i 'm gone
well
i 'm making a public appearance are n't i
they hate me they really hate me do n't they
maybe you should get married
pick one of your cousins it would demonstrate a profound stability
i should at least have you do n't you think
if you get me pregnant with a boy he 'll be a double direct heir and will end up killing you for the throne
did narcissus die today
was n't this his day to die
i 'm sure i do n't know
no one in rome has ever heard of him
do you want to remind those few in the senate who have
the whole sordid thing is far beneath your position to begin with
forget about him
let some time pass
then ask quietly without anyone knowing it comes from me
how about in the forum
right in front of the senate
if i may be so bold
for the gods spit it out
why not do it in the colosseum
kill him
tribuus -- execute that bastard
you ca n't do that
you came here to turn the crowd around not make them hate you
tribuus
tomorrow
you 're coming back
i have to come back
if i do n't come back the people will think i 'm a coward
tribuus tomorrow he dies -- i want his blood on the sand
do you understand
where have you been
taking my pleasure
do i need to clear my lovers with you
you must start clearing everything with me -- especially your lovers
why are you so surly -- you 've won brother
the people have bread and the city is quiet
what is that
wailing
the fans of narcissus
they were on vigil outside the school of proximo
they believe he 's dying
now that is a happy sound
tomorrow i want the citizens -- my people -- back in the arena
the gods know i 'm tired
come to bed now tonight we 're celebrating
what are you talking about
now that we 're done with that infatuation forever
if i ever loved narcissus it was n't like you want
but i get what i want always do n't i
encased in the armor of a demigod narcissus the good continues his impossible climb in the arena where he was unjustly cast
yes
go on
by the emperor of rome
this writer asks between a senate that debates truth until they choke an emperor who has the birth sign of a woman is it possible there is more virtue within the arena than without
tell lykas to send a retiarius and a samnite to help tiger
you ca n't do that
listen to the mood of the crowd
i want that bastard dead
you want control of the crowd -- you ca n't get it by killing their hero
i am their hero
not yet dear brother
send them out
lykas pick a man
someone who will look good
jerses i want it built up in the daily action
do you want posters too
do you expect marcus to be well enough by morning for an audience
that 's difficult to say general
perhaps master galen you may say
then you 'd be out of a job
gladly caesar
or perhaps into a new one
but here 's to your god and the courage of our legions
i back rome against all her enemies -- if that answer disappoints you i 'm not a politician
oh but with the army behind you you could become extremely political
not a republican by any chance
i would say there 's nothing more dangerous than a man who knows what right is
the dangerous man caesar is the man who does n't care
but they 're not destroyed not yet
do we really need to repair this fort
it seems like an expensive undertaking
i propose we burn it to the ground
that way if the germans cross the danube here there will be nothing to help them build an offensive position
you and my father have become very close
perhaps one day i may say the same for us
you flatter me caesar
being as close i 'm certain you 've noticed what we all have noticed
caesar
that this illness has clouded his mind
i 'm ordering a general stand down in preparation for withdrawal back across the danube
we have to stop the germans now
forgive me caesar but do two senator represent the mood of the whole senate or the will of the roman people
besides every truce we make with the germans they break
they wo n't break this one
apparently my opinion was n't needed
endorse me in public
do that and i 'll make you rich and set you free
i 'll return your estates
i know you would give anything to be outside again
endorse me and you will be free
think of it
what would you do with your freedom
if you set me free i will find my way back to the army march on rome and depose you
then the army and i will restore the republic so that animals like you will never control human destinies again
insubordination
to the emperor
and the senate
quintus will tell the army that you are being called to rome to celebrate your victory
they will hear that you are living in luxury
he will let them feel you have betrayed them for the good life
and soon the army wo n't even remember your name
the senate is out to sink you
i swear it caesar your generosity is being repaid with public attacks on your honor
your enemies want you weak enough so by the first of janus when you must be confirmed the senate will be able to deny you
how can they
who else is there
i have no heir
caesar ignore them
ignore that
the sooner we leave this disgusting place the better
at least stay for the running of the animals
you are paying for it you know
gods of hell
this must cost a fortune
how many days is this going to go on
until your confirmation date
and like children everywhere they scream freedom the most when they desire it least
i beg you please continue caesar
at the opening of the month of janus i will ask this noble body to confirm my emperorship
throw it down into the streets
down into the forum
if it 's my father they want then give him to them
yes
you know that 's not a bad idea
maybe it 'll crush gaius
i 'm serious
so am i.
we can crush gaius another way
what if you do throw something to the people they really want
make them a gift of food
give away food
sacks of grain even bread
i own the grain licenses for the military i can arrange to divert a shipment bound for the army of the danube
take grain away from the army
make a gift to the people
it 's your money anyway so it 's only fair
caesar let me sponsor your first wager in the arena
i would n't know who to bet on
we must obey our emperor and the senate
i met with falco and the senators have agreed to call for a truce with the germans
this is the only place in rome where i thought -- i believed -- i was wholly in power
narcissus will never support you caesar he has too much of a philosophical temperament
it 's because he comes off as the underdog
underdog
how can he be an underdog -- he wins all the time
i 'm the emperor why ca n't i kill him
he could be poisoned or somehow killed to look like an accident
you do n't want to kill him
if anything happens to him now you will be blamed
and he knows it
besides that gladiator school is a fortress
it would take the army to break in there
what you want is to
offer him the wooden sword
if he takes it he 's no longer the champion of the people is he
he 's gone
and you are a hero for awarding it
where is my father
where is the emperor and the army soldier
tribuus what happened in the arena
was narcissus killed
he must have been
he was on the list of prisoners to be executed
why is n't he dead
damn you you promised me he would be dead
caesar i did my best
the colosseum is n't under my control
yes caesar
jerses -- tomorrow
tribuus
go left here i want to see my new statue at via claudia
yes caesar
we need more statues -- perhaps i should open medical clinics
for the poor
citizens only though
cos what in hades is the emperor up to
and do n't tell me you do n't know
i do n't know
agh
please
he 's having a secret device constructed for the circus
the brass craftsmen are working overtime
i 'll nose around
you know there were riots last night
now the unrest has started again and commodus has sent for an army division
you understand what you are doing
so tell me what happened between you and the emperor
what really happened on the german front
you know the senate 's arguing your case
that 's their job is n't it
to argue
so i think my case will be long on talk and short on action
i am prepared to write anything you tell me
my birth sign is water bearer twenty fifth day in the month of janus
the exact month when the emperor must be confirmed
the emperor and i are bound by the threads of the fates
he was born on august thirty first you know
that makes his birth sign
virgo
why that 's the sign of a little girl
can you tell my readers more about your star crossed connection with emperor commodus
proximo we need to talk about my one third
i imagine the betting booths will be doing good business
and what was the name of that olive oil company
it 's time for you to tell the citizens that commodus stole the money allocated for defending the german border
it 's time to tell the citizens everything
will you write it
yes because i know they 'll read it
the battle was won today and i prefer to believe it was a gift of janus the eldest god of rome
god of my ancestors
god of passages and changes
i believe we are arriving in an enlightened age an age of peace that will bring rome her greatest glory
thanks to marcus aurelius
you know general there is a gate of janus in rome which is only closed in time of peace
sadly it has remained open for three hundred years
i 've read of it
but have never been
my only visits to rome senator have been through books
but the war 's over time to close the door of war once and for all
i would venture with all respect the emperor 's health is the business of every soul in the empire
yes
the days of imperial prerogative and disdain for the senate are over -- thanks to your father
now report to the senate master galen what is marcus state
a republican is a man who strives to create equality among all classes
at the core he 's a man who believes in doing what 's right
the trouble is defining exactly what right is
we all know what right is senator
you on your way to trial too general
or do you think they 've already had our trial
why you
my loyalties
were in doubt
fools to let us both live we 'll be our own best witnesses at our trial
that 's what worries me
is this rome
are we just going to be executed
they ca n't
if this is rome
no future telling please i 've been terrified enough for one day
narcissus
terrified
you
the only thing he 's scared of is me
you know our two most senior senators gaius cantus and falco verus
only from a distance
i thought all good generals were quick to recognize opportunities
sneaking around with your brother
without him
he 'd be weeping if he overheard that
well
the idea of you as my adopted brother is very
exciting
i 'm not fit for the job and as a matter of fact i 'm not taking the job
why do you keep playing at being so humble
it 's a little embarrassing
why do you play at being drunk
how do you know i am playing
well the clown is always harmless
is n't that right
and how did you ever get to know me so well
the last we spent any time together i was fourteen
i think you know me better than my father
he 's going to die is n't he
i do n't believe that
he 's got the best doctor in the world and a will of iron
you know we 're preparing for a full blown invasion of germany
of course i know -- who do you think is paying for it
the emperor himself did n't you know
why do you think commodus came rushing up to the front
burning patriotism
filial love
he wants to be sure when he takes over there 's enough cash left in the treasury to
play emperor
watch out for him narcissus he 's inexperienced but
be careful
it 's my brother 's neck you want not mine
yours will do
i came here to see that you stay alive
the people need a living breathing alternative to commodus a hero
you mean a symbol of someone who does n't exist
but you do exist
narcissus hero of the battle of the danube
twenty years i 've led men to die
for me it was the glory of rome
but that was something
if it was n't that then it was the pay or the loot of the next whore -- but that was something
these men here are butchered for laughs
their lives are like jokes delivered in the back alley theaters where their death is a punch line
for the sake of the gods you 're not leading these men
how like my father you are
you believe
i guess that 's why you 're still alive
you can not die
would that marcus had lived
marcus would have lived but
was poisoned by his son
he killed his father and then my family
narcissus i have your family
they 're alive
all of them
where are they
hidden
where my brother can not place hands on them
he did n't have the guts to watch them die so
i took care of it all
the sooner he is put out of our misery the sooner will they be safe
commodus it 's we who are going on the offensive
the fort helps position us for a final invasion in the spring when they 're most vulnerable
commodus -- listen to narcissus listen to the man who has never lost a battle for rome
you 're young with years ahead of you before you gain the experience to wear the purple
i want you to start your work for the last phase of the campaign
i will marcus
but you 're going to be well enough to direct it yourself
i 've made so many mistakes narcissus
we all put off the very last duties of our lives because we 're afraid of admitting when our lives are over
there 's no reason to say that
everyone knows you 're going to be well
i had servis groom your horse for a triumphal visit to the front at first light
servis made it through again
he 's like you sir too tough for the gods to swallow
if i 'd ever had a sign that you wanted to rule i would have
no again it 's my own bullheadedness
narcissus i should have adopted you years ago
and now the gods are begging me to make you my son
commodus is just a young man he 'll learn what you had to learn
it 's not because he 's young it 's because he 's ignorant and arrogant
his sister is a better man
that 's why i have undertaken to begin sweeping changes in the relationship between the emperor and the senate
so i understand
everyone talking about it
i would n't wonder
all i seek is a genuine balance of power between the emperor and the senate
thus i have transferred legal power -- which was theirs to begin with -- back to the senators
this includes a shared right to taxation too but some bite in the plan
it 's a start only a start
if the emperor and the senate can share power then the people will be ready to take their share
this means commodus has to bend does he strike you as that type
you 're too hard on him
he is a strong young man with you as his guide
a man should be upright not be kept upright
history shows us that a good general is quick to recognize opportunities -- even if it means making a complete about face at the last minute
i want you to consider becoming my heir
marcus you honor me but i 'm a soldier politics scare the hell out of me
the senators admire you
they fear me
they fear change
the new caesar must be honest enough to know when the emperorship is no longer feasible
you could be the one the emperor the man who oversees the rebirth of the republic
i 'll do anything in my power to help you restore the republic but i ca n't be that power
i made the plume from a quail feather
much more colorful than the ones we wear
and of course less dented
do n't stop to visit -- take the children straight home and i 'll follow as soon as i can
tomorrow
as soon as i can
on your honor as a roman officer daddy
on my honor as your daddy
i see the emperor 's little boy has finally caught up with the army
let 's hope he does n't start giving orders
everyone knew you would have been outspoken against this deal
what deal
rome is going to pay an allotment to the german tribes on an annual basis
rome is going to pay tribute -- like a defeated nation begging for mercy
have you told your troops that
my troops do n't make policy
well they die for it
on his death bed i promised marcus i would complete our work here
the senate may be vacillating but i have the army behind me
i 'm taking half a cohort and restocking that fort
i ca n't let you do that
you brought the army into rome
i was summoned
it 's your job as a roman officer to disobey such a summons
it 's my job to keep my job
and that by the way is now head of praetorian guard
good ole tribuus has been retired
quintus you 've got at least a division with you -- we could take rome away from commodus and give it back to the senate
you seem to be doing a great job of it single hand
narcissus the republic is dead
you think those senators could govern
for the last hundred and fifty years they 've worked hard at kissing an endless succession of imperial asses
then give the empire back to the people
the children who will grow up to become senators
the people
listen to the people they know what they want a government that gives them what they need and does n't bother them with messy thoughts of issues
you know messy
thinking
they want a dictator
as far as the children there is only one thing that every roman child dreams of being you
a famous gladiator
what are you fighting for in here
the good of rome
i can end this madness now
take the job for the sake of the gods live
can you stop that slaughter
can you free these men
he 's very realistic
is n't the helmet magnificent
well you wanted the girls to have the best teachers
greeks
athenians
what about their philosophy lessons
they 're studying with cynics
of course
very fancy
did you design the bottle
who else
i 'm the one who runs the estates while you 're here risking everything we have for the glory of rome
or for the glory of you
i 'm a soldier -- we 're at war
i ca n't stay home tending the damned olive groves
we do n't need your help we 're doing great on our own
i want to come home of course i do i 'd have to be mad not to want that
it 's just that marcus trusts me
let him trust quintus
quintus is overly idealistic
i never knew a more idealistic man than you
me
well i believe in rome
you 'd have to after what i 've seen how people outside the empire treat each other
i do n't even want to imagine the things you 've seen
what you do n't want to imagine is the things i 've done
when you get to ostia use this -- bribe passage to africa or spain
save my family
you should be able to find a merchant ship that will take you to egypt then to numidia
no
you 're not going
you have to stay with us
how long do you think commodus will let us live once he 's in power
a month
half a year
paestum will be a prison where he 'll hold us until it 's time
narcissus
do you want to see themis and manto butchered
if i die fighting commodus he wo n't care about you
if i live i 'll come and get you
i do n't want you to die
i 'll never die
you tell the girls that
you honor our ancestors and i 'll be there
every night
at the table of life
your daughters need more than some vapors they need you
they 'll have me
teach them
do n't let them become like these ignorant heaps of citizens without history without philosophy without meaning
teach them of the greeks the babylonians the hebrews the numidians the egyptians and the great romans
teach them who we are
you teach them
that 's what i 'm going to do
that 's what i 'm going to do
you 're a legate in the roman army
huh
and you act like one
what was your crime
i killed too many barbarians
i 'm a greek thank you
and i was brought up believing romans were the barbarians
give our new colleague some of the cretan white
relax tell me everything i 'm your friend
who the hell are you
i am the man who might save your life -- give you a bit more life at any rate
i am proximo palindromos head of this gladiatorial school which is named after me
i own this school and everything that 's in it
you 're in it
but why
what did a roman general do to get himself condemned to the colosseum
understand we usually get corn thieves and pick pockets
please i separated you from the others because
my nose tells me you 've been condemned for important reasons
condemned
are n't i owed a trial before being condemned
general all i know is you have been condemned to the colosseum and a trial is nowhere to be seen
impossible
every citizen has a right to trial -- this is rome
thank you
what is going to happen tomorrow
exactly
you are to be killed exactly
they 'll give you a sporting chance but just enough to make your murder
entertaining
romans like to mix their metaphors laughter with their executions you know
if you survive though you will become a gladiator
a gladiator at least gets a fair fight
death is a very light thing for you
death is
everything for me
now you have to go to your cell and i to dicker with jerses
you 'll be fed well
i want you to be fit as you can be i want you to win for me tomorrow
i want all my gladiators to win and be happy
besides i 've never owned a roman general before
legate narcissus meridas general of the spanish felix legions
i 'm proud to have you in my school
now show them what you can do
i 'm not a gladiator
i refuse to fight
then you 'll die
just know this because you asked i asked i 'm sorry but
general do you realize what happened out there today
i did n't get killed and everyone else did
that 's one way to look at it
at the end of the day i was approached by the golden pompeii olive oil company
small but profitable
they asked if you would endorse their oil
we could get some very nice posters
make some very big money
what would the poster say narcissus would kill for a taste of golden pompeii olive oil
think about it
just think about it
general hang on
drink slowly
you are blessed by the gods to have a physician and a divine of janus with you tonight
a fan sent them to you
alive
i 'm alive
proximo if this is her doctor he 's an assassin
do n't be ridiculous
it will be good luck for you to wear that helmet
it belonged to cimon of smyrna
he was crushed by an elephant
lucky it did n't step on his head
no more bad luck now
the people are anticipating you
i have posters up over half the city advertising you as the great warrior -- the true roman
the man who fought side by side with the wolf of rome
make us rich proximo make us very rich
tiger 's challenged you and jerses has made me an offer made us both an offer you take a fall
what the hell are you talking about greek
how much money is involved
a great deal
they designed and build tiger 's chariot
they want to dump tiger and have me endorse their damned chariot right
they do n't waste time
i can really rape them on this
can i at least tell them you 'll think about it
no
tell them i 'll do it
but i want more posters all over rome
fantastic
wonderful
but posters are very expensive
then get a large cash advance
right right
but they 'll have to bring in a lawyer
i do n't want to get sued over this
before they leave get gold
right right what am i thinking of
i want another interview with cos
tell him to bring plenty of ink
i 'll do it
sure as there 's shit in the tiber we 're all going to die but for you -- anything
so things change
the government has moved to the circus
you 're going to fight last
and commodus is going to fight first
you were a soldier and then a gladiator were n't you
was i
let 's talk about this later
right now we have other things to settle
you and your family will be leaving with a supply ship returning in the morning to ostia
from there caesar has decreed you be given an estate in paestum
it 's beautiful an old greek town right on the ocean
rich soil
perhaps we could keep our financial arrangements
although caesar will give you a sort of pension it 's always good to look to the future keep your hand in the arena
so to speak
i want nothing to do with the arena
something else then
do the chariot races interest you
commodus must hate you
free your gladiators and come with us
are you mad
with all this unrest the colosseum will be open day and night
anyway i 'm not political i 'm in the entertainment business
hello
hello
you 're living at home now
is that right
yes
do you know what you 're going to do
no
are you going to graduate school
no
do you always drive like this
yes
do you want some dinner
i 'd love some
could you do it
no
will you take me home now
i 'm sorry i took you in there
i think i 'd better go home now please
but elaine --
where is the car
i just want to tell you something
i want to go home
but could i just tell you this one thing
what
this whole idea -- this date and everything
it was my parents idea
they forced me into it
oh -- that 's very nice of you to tell me
no
what i mean is -- that 's why i 've been acting this way
i 'm not like this
i hate myself like this
listen -- could you stop crying please
no i could n't
but could you try
no
i 've had this feeling -- ever since i 've graduated -- this -- kind of compulsion that i have to be rude all the time
do you know what i mean
yes i do
would you like to come in
i could make some coffee
no i mean -- i would n't want to wake anyone up
we wo n't
let 's go inside
wait a minute
is anything wrong
no -- i was just thinking -- look -- it 's still early -- we could do something -- go somewhere else
all right
where we going
i 'm trying to think of where there 's a place to have a drink around here
is n't there one in the taft hotel
what is the matter
nothing
i 'm just wondering if they have a bar or not
i mean let 's go see
let 's go see if they do or not
ben -- what 's happening
who is mr. gladstone
i do n't know
they must think i look like this guy gladstone
do you
yes
you 're the first -- you 're the first thing for so long that i 've liked
the first person i could stand to be with
i 'm sorry
that is not my business
it just happened
it was just this thing that happened along with everything else
can you understand that
was she married or something
yes
with a family
yes
she had a husband and a son
did they ever find out
no
and it 's all over now
yes
i 'm glad
all right
during the day
we 'll go for a drive or something
okay
you sure you really want to
yes
because i would n't want you to do it unless you really wanted to
i do
you do
benjamin -- i really do
what 's the matter
you 've got to go over the back fence and i 'll meet you on the corner
benjamin -- what 's happening
hurry up
put your shoes on
why are n't you ready
because i want to know what 's happening
what is it
that woman --
what
that woman
the older woman
you mean the one who --
yes
the married woman -- it was n't just some woman --
i 'm meeting someone
ah
where
where are you meeting this person
at the zoo
the zoo
they have a pretty good one here do they
i 've never been to it
oh
well i have n't either
i might just ride out there with you
is that him over there
no
where did he say he was going to meet you
i thought he said by the monkey house
oh
benjamin -- i would like to know what you 're doing here
here
in berkeley
yes
well i have this very pleasant room on carter street -- and i 've been getting to some classes --
but you 're not enrolled
no
i just sit in
they do n't seem to mind
they 've been very congenial about it
benjamin -- you 're -- i do n't know what to say -- you 're --
maybe we could get together some time and talk about it
-- really incredible --
here he comes
what
i 've got a real feeling that this is the fellow
i want to ask you a question
come in
no
i want to know why you 're here in berkeley
because -- i am
is it because i 'm here
what do you think
i think it is
i said i think it is
all right then
yes
well i want you to leave
elaine -- i love you
how could you do that benjamin
do you just hate everything
how could you possibly rape my
what
i do n't understand --
did you say rape her
-- how you -- how anyone -- could do a thing like that
what did she say
let me go
you 've got to tell me what she said
please let me go
all right -- but listen to me
what happened was there was this party at my parents
i drove your mother home -- then we went upstairs to see your portrait --
do n't tell me --
-- and when we got up in the room she starts taking her her clothes off -- and --
benjamin -- this is my mother
-- suddenly there she was without any clothes on -- i mean really naked --
benjamin when you came up here what did you think was going to happen between us
elaine -- right now i do n't feel like talking much
i 'm sorry about everything but i think i 'll just do this now
can i just sit here while you 're packing
if you want
what are you looking for
my belt
do n't you have it on
no
i have two
the other one is the one i 'm looking for
what 's this
it 's from my grandmother
the marble
the belt i 'm looking for was from my grandmother
oh
what are you going to do now
i do n't know
are you going home
no
well -- where are you going
i do n't want you to leave tomorrow
i do n't understand
i do n't want you to go anywhere until you have a definite plan
but elaine --
goodbye
well -- look -- do n't be confused
we 're getting married
i do n't see how we can
we just can
i have to go back now
elaine -- are you serious about this
i 'll think about it
you really will
yes
we could go down and get our blood tests tomorrow
tomorrow
or this afternoon
it 's a good day for it
benjamin -- i have n't even said i 'll marry you yet
we 'll need our birth certificates
i happen to have mine with me
where 's yours
i just do n't think it would work
why would n't it
why would n't it
i just do n't think it would
why do n't you just drag me off if you want to marry me so much
why do n't i just drag you off
all right -- i will
right after we get the blood tests
well -- i have to see carl first
carl who
carl who
carl smith
he 's a medical student
we 've known him for years
who -- that guy at the zoo
yes
why do you have to see him
well -- i said i might marry him
how did he do it
did he get down on his knees
he did n't get down on his knees i hope
no benjamin
well what did he say
i 'm curious
he said he thought we 'd make a pretty good team
oh no
he said that
shhhh
where did he do it
657 2036
hello -- who is this
this is dr. smith 's answering service
is the doctor anywhere
well -- you see -- the doctor is at his son 's wedding but i 'm sure it 's over by now
he should be checking in any moment --
listen to me
i am dr. smith 's brother -- reverend smith -- and i am supposed to perform the ceremony
i just got in -- from -- portland -- and i 've forgotten what church -- you see
oh
well -- i 'm not sure -- but you might try the first presbyterian
that 's on allan street
thank you
i certainly hope you --
ben
excuse me
mr. mcquire
ben
mr. mcquire
ben -- i just want to say one word to you -- just one word --
yes sir
are you listening
yes i am
plastics
exactly how do you mean
there is a great future in plastics
think about it
will you think about it
yes i will
okay
enough said
that 's a deal
you a student
not exactly
what 's that
i said -- not exactly -- no
what are you then
well -- i 'm just sort of traveling through
i like to know who 's living in my house
i like to know what my boys are up to
ahhh
what did you do to her
look -- she 's all right
she 's upset and she screamed
but she 's okay now
see -- she 's just having some water
now there 's no need for the cops or anything
all right boys -- i think you can get back to your rooms
i do n't think we 'll have any more of this agitation
will we braddock
no sir
mr. mccleery
you heard me
out of here
what for
because i do n't like you
mr. mccleery -- do you have some change
i need to use the phone
i want you out of here
look -- i 'll give you ten dollars for a dime -- i 'll give you twenty -- for god 's sake will you let me use that phone
i am going to call the police now
could i make one phone call first
get out
benjamin
yes
will you bring up my purse before you go
i have to go now
i 'm sorry
mrs. robinson
i 'm in the bathroom
well here 's the purse
could you bring it up
well i 'll hand it to you
come to the railing and i 'll hand it up
benjamin -- i am getting pretty tired of all this suspicion
now if you wo n't do me a simple favor i do n't know what
i 'm putting it on the top step
for god 's sake benjamin will you stop acting that way and bring me the purse
can i help you sir
what
oh -- no -- i 'm just --
what
the singleman party sir
oh -- yes
the singleman party
it 's in the main ballroom
ahh -- thank you
yes sir
a room
i 'd like a room please
a single room or a double room
a single
just for myself please
will you sign the register please
is anything wrong sir
what
no
nothing
do you have any luggage mister -- gladstone
luggage
yes
yes
i do
where is it
what
where is your luggage
well it 's in the car
it 's out in the car
very good sir
i 'll have a porter bring it in
oh no
sir
i mean i 'd -- i 'd rather not go to the trouble of bringing it all in
i just have a toothbrush
i can get it myself
if that 's all right
of course
i 'll have a porter show you the room
oh
well actually i 'd just as soon find it myself
i just have the toothbrush to carry up and i think i can manage it myself
whatever you say sir
oh
i guess this is n't the bathroom is it
it 's down the hall
how are you benjamin
fine thank you
the bathroom is down at the end of the hall
is there an ashtray in here
no
oh -- i forgot
the track star does n't smoke
you do n't
no
let 's go
thank you
right
will you come in please
what
i want you to come in till i get the lights on
what for
because i do n't feel safe until i get the lights on
would you mind walking ahead of me to the sun porch
i feel funny about coming into a dark house
but it 's light in there now
please
what do you drink
bourbon
look -- i drove you home
i was glad to do it
but i have some things on my mind
can you understand that
all right then
what do you drink
benjamin -- i 'm sorry to be this way but i do n't want to be alone in this house
why not
please wait till my husband gets home
when is he coming back
i do n't know
drink
no
oh my god
pardon
oh no mrs. robinson oh no
what 's wrong
mrs. robinson you did n't -- i mean you did n't expect --
what
i mean -- you did n't really think that i would do something like that
like what
what do you think
well i do n't know
for god 's sake mrs. robinson here we are you 've got me into your house
you give me a drink
you put on music now you start opening up your personal life to me and tell me your husband wo n't be home for hours
so
mrs. robinson -- you are trying to seduce me
are n't you
why no
i had n't thought of it
i feel rather flattered that you --
mrs. robinson will you forgive me for what i just said
it 's all right
it 's not all right it 's the worst thing i 've ever said to anyone
sit down
please forgive me
because i like you
i do n't think of you that way
but i 'm mixed up
all right
now finish your drink
mrs. robinson it makes me sick that i said that to you
we 'll forget it right now
finish your drink
what is wrong with me
have you ever seen elaine 's portrait
her portrait
yes
no
we had it done last christmas
would you like to see it
very much
i do n't remember her as having brown eyes
benjamin
yes
will you unzip my dress
i think i 'll go to bed
oh
well goodnight
wo n't you unzip my dress
i 'd rather not mrs. robinson
if you still think i 'm trying to seduce you --
no i do n't
but i just feel a little funny
benjamin -- you 've known me all your life
i know that
but i 'm --
come on
thank you
right
what are you so scared of
i 'm not scared mrs. robinson
then why do you keep running away
because you 're going to bed
i do n't think i should be up here
have n't you ever seen anybody in a slip before
yes i have --
but i just -- look -- what if mr. robinson walked in right now
what if he did
well it would look pretty funny would n't it
do n't you think he trusts us together
of course he does
but he might get the wrong idea
anyone might
i do n't see why
i 'm twice as old as you are
how could anyone think --
but they would
do n't you see
benjamin -- i 'm not trying to seduce you
i wish you 'd --
i know that
but please mrs. robinson
this is difficult for me
why is it
because i am confused about things
i ca n't tell what i 'm imagining
i ca n't tell what 's real
i ca n't --
would you like me to seduce you
what
is that what you 're trying to tell me
i 'm going home now
i apologize for what i said
i hope you can forget it
but i 'm going home right now
yes i do
i 've got to go
benjamin
yes
thank you for taking me home
hello benjamin
oh
hello
hello
may i sit down
of course
how are you
very well
thank you
may i have a drink
a drink
of course
he did n't see me
waiter
you do n't have to be so nervous you know
nervous
well i am a bit nervous
i mean it 's -- it 's pretty hard to be suave when you 're --
well
benjamin
yes
i 'll get undressed now
is that all right
sure
shall i -- i mean shall i just stand here
i mean -- i do n't know what you want me to do
why do n't you watch
oh -- sure
thank you
will you bring me a hanger
what
a hanger
oh -- yes
wood
what
wood or wire
they have both
either one will be fine
okay
thank you
you 're welcome
would this be easier for you in the dark
mrs. robinson -- i ca n't do this
you what
this is all terribly wrong
benjamin -- do you find me undesirable
oh no mrs. robinson
i think -- i think you 're the most attractive of all my parents friends
i just do n't think we could possibly --
are you afraid of me
no -- but look -- maybe we could do something else together mrs. robinson -- would you like to go to a movie
benjamin is this your first time
is this -- what
it is is n't it
it is your first time
that 's a laugh mrs. robinson
that 's really a laugh
ha ha
you can admit that ca n't you
are you kidding
it 's nothing to be ashamed of --
wait a minute
on your first time --
who said it was my first time
that you 're afraid --
wait a minute
-- of bring -- inadequate -- i mean just because you happen to be inadequate in one way --
inadequate
now -- do you think we could say a few words to each other first this time
if you want
good
i mean are we dead or something
well i just do n't think we have much to say to each other
all we ever do is come up here and throw off the clothes and leap into bed together
are you tired of it
i 'm not
no
but do you think we could liven it up with a few words now and then
well what do you want to talk about
anything
anything at all
do you want to tell me about some of your college experiences
oh my god
well
mrs. robinson
if that 's the best we can do let 's just get the goddamn clothes off and --
leave it on
now we are going to do this thing
we are going to have a conversation
think of another topic
how about art
art
that 's a good subject
you start it off
you start it off
i do n't know anything about it
oh
do n't you
yes i do
i know quite a bit about it
go ahead then
art
well what do you want to know about it
are you interested more in modern art or more in classical art
neither
you 're not interested in art
no
then why do you want to talk about it
i do n't
then i fixed supper for my husband and waited until --
there
what
your husband
mrs. robinson
there 's something we could have a conversation about
him
i mean everything
i do n't know anything about how you -- how you work this
i do n't know how you get out of the house at night
i do n't know the risk involved
there is n't any
there 's no risk
how do you get out of the house
i walk out
you walk right out the door
what do you say to him
he 's asleep
always
benjamin this is n't a very interesting topic
please
now tell me
how do you know he wo n't wake up sometime and follow you
because he takes sleeping pills
he takes three sleeping pills every night at ten o'clock
but what about the noise from the car
what if --
the driveway 's on my side of the house
we 're talking
what
we 're talking mrs. robinson
we 're talking
calm down benjamin
now let 's keep going here
can i undress and talk at the same time
right
thank you
now
you say the driveway 's on your side of the house
so i guess you do n't sleep in the same room
we do n't
so you do n't -- i mean i do n't like to seem like i 'm prying but i guess you do n't sleep together or anything
no we do n't
well how long has this been going on
about five years
oh no
are you kidding me
no
you have not slept with your husband for five years
now and then
he gets drunk a few times a year
how many times a year
on new year 's eve
sometimes on his birthday
man is this interesting
is it
so you do n't love him
you would n't say you --
we 've talked enough benjamin
wait a minute
so you would n't say you loved him
not exactly
but you do n't hate him
no benjamin
i do n't hate him
unhook my blouse
well how do you feel about him then
i do n't
well that 's kind of a bad situation then is n't it
is it
i mean it does n't sound like it could be much worse
if you hated him at least you 'd hate him
well you loved him once i assume
when you first knew him
no
what
i never did benjamin
now let 's --
well wait a minute
you married him
why did you do that
see if you can guess
well i ca n't
think real hard benjamin
i ca n't see why you did unless
you did n't have to marry him or anything did you
do n't tell elaine
oh no
you had to marry him because you got pregnant
are you shocked
well i never thought of you and mr. robinson as the kind of people who
all right
now let 's get to bed
wait a minute
wait a minute
so how did it happen
what
i mean do you feel like telling me what were the circumstances
not particularly
was he a law student at the time
and you were a student also
yes
at college
yes
what was your major
why are you asking me all this
because i 'm interested mrs. robinson
now what was your major subject at college
art
art
but i thought you -- i guess you kind of lost interest in it over the years then
kind of
well how did it happen
how do you think
i mean did he take you up to his room with him
did you go to a hotel
benjamin what does it possibly matter
i 'm curious
we 'd go to his car
oh no
in the car you did it
i do n't think we were the first
what kind of car was it
what
do you remember the make of the car
oh my god
really
i want to know
it was a ford benjamin
a ford
a ford
goddamnit a ford
that 's great
that 's enough
so old elaine robinson got started in a ford
well -- i guess i 'll have to ask her out on a date and find out what 's --
benjamin do n't you ever take that girl out
do you understand that
well look
i have no intention of taking her out
good
i was just kidding around
good
but why should n't i
i have my reasons
then let 's hear them
no
let 's hear your reasons mrs. robinson
because i think i know what they are
i 'm not good enough for her to associate with am i
i 'm not good enough to even talk about her am i
let 's drop it
we 're not dropping it
now that 's the reason is n't it
i 'm a dirty degenerate are n't i
i 'm not fit to --
benjamin
i 'm good enough for you but i 'm too slimy to associate with your daughter
that 's it is n't it
isn't it
yes
you go to hell
you go straight to hell mrs. robinson
do you think i 'm proud of myself
do you think i 'm proud of this
i would n't know
well i 'm not
you 're not
no sir
i am not proud that i spend my time with a broken down alcoholic
i see
and if you think i come here for any reason besides pure boredom then you 're all wrong
because -- mrs. robinson this is the sickest most perverted thing that ever happened to me
and you do what you want but i 'm getting the hell out
are you
you 're goddamn right i am
that i 'm a sick and disgusting person
now do n't start this
what
do n't start acting hurt
do n't you expect me to be a little hurt
mrs. robinson you stand there and tell me i 'm not good enough for your daughter
did i say that
of course you did
benjamin i want to apologize to you if that 's the impression you got
well two minutes ago you told me i was n't good enough for your daughter
now you say you 're sorry i got that impression
i did n't mean it
i do n't think you 'd be right for each other
but i would never say you were n't as good a person as she is
you would n't
of course i would n't
what are you doing
well it 's pretty obvious you do n't want me around any more
well look -- i was kind of upset there
i 'm sorry i said those things
if that 's how you feel --
but it 's not
that 's all right
i think i can understand why i 'm disgusting to you
oh no
look -- i like you
i would n't keep coming here if i did n't like you
but if it 's sickening for you --
it 's not
i enjoy it
i look forward to it
it 's the one thing i have to look forward to
you do n't have to say that
well i would n't
i would never say it if it was n't true
may i stay then
yes
please
i want you to
thank you
well do n't thank me because i want you to
look
why the hell did you bring this up
it never occurred to me to take her out
then give me your word you wo n't
this is absurd
promise me benjamin
all right for christ 's sake
i promise i will never take out elaine robinson
thank you
benjamin --
let 's not talk about it
let 's not talk at all
now it seems to me --
listen to me very carefully benjamin
you are not to see elaine again
ever
those are my orders
is that clear
mrs. robinson --
i can makes things quite unpleasant
how
in order to keep elaine away from you -- i am prepared to tell her everything
i do n't believe you
then you 'd better start believing me
mrs. robinson do n't wreck it
i 'm asking you please not to wreck it
go home now
i just do n't believe you would do that
hello
get me the police please
where is elaine
i 'll be with you in a moment benjamin
will you send a police car to twelve hundred glenview road
we have a burgler here
just a second
i 'll ask him
are you armed
no -- i do n't believe he is
thank you
what have you done to her
i think we have everything quite under control now benjamin
would you like a quick drink before you go
you ca n't stop me from seeing her mrs. robinson
i 'll find her
i 'm sorry we wo n't be able to invite you to the wedding benjamin but the arrangements have been so rushed --
what the hell have you done
ahh
i do n't think you 'll have time for that drink after all
i 'll find her
i do n't think so
i say i 've got it
sir
the toothbrush
i got it all right
very good sir
yes
well -- goodnight
goodnight sir
no -- actually i 'm not --
i 'd like you to know my sister miss dewitte --
can i talk to you a minute
sure
benjamin
i 'm going to ask you something but you do n't have to tell me if you do n't want
what
well i 'm going to ask you what you do when you go off at night
when i go off
you do n't have to tell me if you do n't want
no i do
i want to tell you
i drive around
what else
nothing else
well you do n't drive around from midnight until noon the next day benjamin
oh no
then what do you do
do you meet someone
meet someone
why did you say that
well this is your business benjamin
if you --
no wait
wait
i do n't meet anyone mother but why did you say that
benjamin i 'm not going to pry into your affairs but i 'd rather you did n't say anything at all than be dishonest
goodnight benjamin
well wait
well why do you -- why do you think that
because i know you do n't drive around for twelve hours
oh
well i do n't
shall i tell you what i do
not if you do n't want to
i do
but i do n't want you to make up something
i 'm not
but i 'm -- i 'm not very proud of what i do
i usually get kind of drunk
i usually drive over to los angeles and go to some bars and get kind of drunk
then i take a hotel room
so i wo n't have to drive home on the freeway
i mean it kind of scares me to drive home after --
goodnight benjamin
you believe me do n't you
no
you do n't
but i want you to
please
please will you believe me
goodnight
it 's pretty embarrassing
i really do n't know what to tell mr. robinson
it 's awkward and strained for me every time he suggests that you call up elaine
next time he suggests it i 'll tell him i have no intention of ever calling her up in my life
do n't go on like this
now if benjamin absolutely refuses to take her out --
i do
-- then i 'll simply invite all the robinsons over for dinner on thursday
when did you two talk this over
we have n't
i 'm just --
-- worried
well --
about what
i guess -- about my future
what about it
i do n't know
i want it to be --
to be what
different
why
well -- it 's very comfortable -- just to drift here
have you thought about graduate school
no
would you mind telling me then -- what were those four years of college for
what was the point of all that hard work
you got me
now listen ben
i think it 's a very good thing that a young man -- after he 's done some very good work -- should have a chance to relax and enjoy himself and lie around and drink beer and so on
but after a few weeks i believe that person would want to take some stock in himself and his situation and start to think about getting off his ass
i guess she 's not good enough for you is that it
look -- elaine robinson and i do not get along
how do you know
you have n't seen her since high school
i guess your evenings whatever you do with them are just too valuable
that has nothing to do with it --
i guess i 'll just tell mr. robinson that you 're just too busy every evening -- doing god knows what --
say that again
i 'm going to marry elaine robinson
come on let 's call the robinsons
we 've got something to celebrate
no
i think you 'll want to wait on that
wait a minute
you talked to elaine this morning
no
she does n't know about it
she does n't know that you 're coming up to berkeley
no
actually -- she does n't know about us getting married yet
ben -- this whole idea sounds pretty half baked
no -- it 's not
it 's completely baked
it 's a decision i 've made
thank you very much sir
ben -- how old are you now
twenty
i 'll be twenty one next week
that 's a hell of a good age to be
thank you
i wish i was that age again
because ben --
sir
you 'll never be young again
i know
ben can i say something to you
what
how long have we known each other now
how long have you and i known each other
how long have your dad and i been partners
quite a while
i 've watched you grow up ben
yes sir
in many ways i feel as though you were my own son
thank you
so i hope you wo n't mind my giving you a friendly piece of advice
i 'd like to hear it
ben -- i think -- i think you ought to be taking it a little easier right now than you seem to
you have yourself a few flings this summer
i bet you 're quite a ladies man
oh no
what
you look like the kind of guy that has to fight them off
does n't he look to you like the kind of guy who has to fight them off
oh say -- elaine gets down from berkeley on saturday
oh yes
ben -- i want you to give her a call
i will
great
hi ben
what are you doing with yourself these days
oh -- not too much
taking it easy
that 's what i 'd do if i could
nothing wrong with that
hey ben elaine 's coming down from berkeley soon
i want you to call her up this time
i will
because i just think you two would hit it off real well together
hello
what would you say to a short one
bourbon still your drink
yes
do you want -- do you want to try and tell me why you did it
mr. robinson
do you have a special grudge against me
do you feel a particularly strong resentment for me
no it 's not --
is there something i 've said that 's caused this contempt
or is it just the things i stand for that you despise
it was nothing to do with you sir
well ben it was quite a bit to do with me
now look -- please --
ben i think we 're two civilized human beings
do you think it 's necessary to threaten each other
i am not threatening you
do you want to unclench your fists please
thank you
i can see in the dark you know
i 've been here quite a while
i am trying to tell you i have no personal feelings about you mr. robinson
i am trying to tell you i do not resent you
you do n't respect me terribly much either do you
no i do n't
well i do n't think we have a whole lot to say to each other ben
i do think you should know the consequences of what you 've done
i do think you should know that my wife and i are getting a divorce soon
but why
why
it should n't make any difference what happened
that 's quite a statement
listen to me
we got -- we got into bed with each other
but it was nothing
it was nothing at all
we might -- we might just as well have been shaking hands
shaking hands
well that 's not saying much for my wife is it
you miss the point
do n't shout at me ben
the point is -- i do n't love your wife
i love your daughter sir
well -- i 'm sure you think you do ben but after a few times in bed with elaine i feel quite sure you 'd get over that as quickly as you --
huh
i think i 've talked about this enough
i do n't know how far i can go ben
i do n't know if i can prosecute or not but i think maybe i can
in the light of what 's happened i think maybe i can get you behind bars if you ever look at my daughter again
i have seen elaine and i have spent the afternoon taking steps to insure
are you ready in there feature attraction
could i speak to you for a second dad
dad -- could we just talk about this for a second
twenty one years old ladies and gentlemen four of those years spent accomplishing some rather extraordinary things at one of our nation 's leading seats of learning --
i ca n't hold them much longer ben
you better get out here
i 'd like to discuss this
this boy -- i 'm sorry -- this young man -- is soon to continue his education as a frank halpingham award scholar -- but before he does --
-- before he does -- you 're disappointing them ben
you 're disappointing them
dad -- can you listen --
i 'll give you ten seconds
he is going to give us a practical demonstration of what i feel safe in saying is a pretty exciting birthday present -- and it better work or i 'm out over two hundred bucks -- so let 's hear it for --
is anything wrong
no
no -- we 're just on our way downstairs
the carlsons are here
they are
come on
they came all the way from tarzana
it 's a wonderful thing to have so many devoted friends
what 's happening
ben says he and elaine are getting married
i do n't believe it
that what he says
right
i ought n't to presume but i -- i 'm so grateful to you -- it 's been so marvelous
the first time in my life i have gambled -- i 've danced
oh you can laugh gentlemen but it 's the first time in my life i 've ever tasted life
splendid
life gentlemen is wonderful but very dangerous
you must have courage for it then it 's wonderful
you gentlemen do n't know that because you are all healthy and happy but i -- believe me -- a man must know death and not until then does a man know anything about life
rejoice in life while yet the small lamp burns
it 's a short life and a gay one
every glass high to life -- the splendid dangerous mighty brief -- brief life -- and the courage to live it
baron you know -- i 've only lived since last night -- but that little while seems longer than all the time before -- all the --
have you a minute now
no -- i told you not to come in this lobby
time 's getting short
i 've told you a hundred times not to speak to me with a cigarette in your mouth
i want to speak --
not now
yes sir
you are late -- the dancer 's gone to the theatre
well
she 's gone to the theatre -- do n't you know
yes
and what are you going to do
the pearls are in her room
now listen to me
the others are getting suspicious of you
i was on the telephone to amsterdam today they think you 're scared
i 've been careful i 've been waiting my chance
you 've been waiting your chance
you 're too much of a gentleman -- that 's the trouble with you
i told you i 'll get the pearls tonight
need any help
no
have you got that skeleton key
no --
why
the floor clerk is out there in the corridor -- she sees everything ---
i could take care of her
how
chloroform on a handkerchief from behind -- while you
no -- no -- no -- no
why
poor girl -- chloroform would give her a rotten headache
i know -- i had it in the war
besides she 's very pretty -- not young but --
you 're no good for this business
it 's just a joke to you
i do n't like your tone
no --
get out and leave it to me
be ready to leave on the night train for amsterdam
with the pearls
with the pearls --
never
you 're a fool
yes i am rather
he must be very nice
who
whoever is keeping you waiting
have you seen it
oh my large and noisy neighbor -- really
that
that
you
oh -- work
oh
dictation
you know
oh
poor child
if you were free i 'd ask you to come and have some tea -- but --
tea would spoil my dinner
one meal a day i 'd hate to spoil it
reducing
no -- why
-- should i
lord no -- charming -- but why one meal a day
money -- ever heard of it
yes -- yes indeed -- but you are a
a stenographer
do n't little stenographers earn little pennies
very little
too bad
did you ever see a stenographer with a decent frock on
-- one that she 'd bought herself
poor child -- i wish i were free tonight -- we could --
are n't you
what
free --
unfortunately no -- to bad -- tomorrow though
tomorrow
what time tomorrow
shall we say five o'clock -- downstairs
where downstairs
yellow room where they dance --
you 're very funny --
yes
-- tomorrow
of course
really
we 'll dance
all right
we 'll dance
i 'd given you up
sorry
chasing around
chasing what
money
you were very different yesterday
yesterday -- yes -- that was yesterday
that was lovely
will you do me a big favor
i 'll do anything for you
would you like to make a man happy
yes -- i 'd love to
then dance the next number with kringelein
why
i feel sorry for him
you 're not a bit like you were yesterday
i fell in love last night -- the real thing
oh -- there 's no real thing -- it does n't exist
i thought that too -- but i found that it does
come along dance with kringelein
anything for you
going
yes --
poor little grusinskaya
does it do you good to cry
are you afraid
shall i go
i was so alone -- always alone -- and suddenly you were there and said that
no
i am not afraid
it is strange
do n't cry -- it tears my heart to see you sob like that
nerves -- just nerves
you must forgive me
i have had a bad evening
i am very tired
do you know what it is to be tired -- tired of a routine existence
i 'm afraid not -- i usually do just what i feel like doing at the moment
so you feel like coming into a lady 's room -- and you come
what now
i 'd like to smoke a cigarette
certainly
why do you look at me like that
i did not know you were so beautiful
and --
and then --
no irony
you 're so appealing -- so soft -- so tired
i feel like taking you in my arms and not letting anything more happen to you -- ever
and -- and --
how tired you are
yes -- tired
so alone
alone
all alone
oh you strange -- strange creature
you must n't talk russian to me
strange man
am i quite strange to you
not quite strange now
it is as if i had been expecting you
you know once when the grand duke was alive i found a man hiding in my room -- a young officer --
and
he disappeared
later he was found dead
i never knew it was so dangerous to hide in a woman 's room when she 's alone
go away
who are you --
a man who could love -- that is all who has forgotten everything else for you
you could love me
it is so long since i have heard that word
nobody has loved me for a long time
it is so icy cold to be famous
one is so cruelly alone
how is it that you -- let me look at you
your hands
your eyes
why could you love me
i saw you just now -- then i saw you cry -- and now i see you in the mirror -- grusinskaya
grusinskaya
oh -- oh if you knew how i slaved and slaved for grusinskaya -- for the success of grusinskaya -- for the triumph of grusinskaya
and what is she now
just someone who has found that on the day success ceases life ceases -- are you listening to me -- do you understand
-- i want you to understand
yes -- i do understand
i think you must go now -- the key is on the floor
i 'm not going -- you know i 'm not going -- let me stay here
i want to be alone
that is not so -- you do n't want to be alone
i want to be alone --
no -- you do n't want to be alone at all -- you were in despair before -- if i left you you 'd feel worse than you did before you must not be alone -- you must n't cry -- you must forget
tell me that i can stay with you -- tell me
just for a minute then
the stage frays one 's nerves
the discipline -- it 's so exacting
discipline means doing what you do n't want to do and take no pleasure in doing
do you know what i mean
have you ever experienced the weariness that comes from discipline
i
-- oh no
i do only what i take pleasure in doing
i see -- you do only what you take pleasure in doing
you take pleasure in coming into a woman 's bedroom and you come
you take pleasure in a dangerous climb onto a balcony so you do it
and what is your pleasure now
i should like to smoke
why do you smile
because i can see something in the mirror that you can not
my dear --
what can you see
you are beautiful
no
beautiful but so sad
i did not know it was so dangerous to look into a woman 's bedroom
i 'm not going
you know that i 'm not going
do you think i could leave you alone here
after that --
what
the veronal -- you
i 'm going to stay here with you
i want to be alone
that is not the truth
you do not want to be alone -- you 're afraid of being alone -- i know you 're afraid
i know you
you were desperate just now if i go away you 'll be more desperate than ever
say i am to stay with you
say it
oh -- i was ambitious then -- ambition was in my blood -- no rest no stopping
we were drilled like little soldiers -- we danced in the school of the imperial ballet in st. petersburg
i was little and slim but hard as diamond -- a duty machine -- no rest no stopping
and then -- i became famous and whoever is famous is alone
but why should i be telling you this
last night i did not know you at all -- who are you really
-- i do not even know your name
i am felix benvenuto von gaigern
my mother called me flix
flix
-- and how do you live
what kind of a person are you
i 'm a prodigal son the black sheep of a white flock -- i shall die on the gallows
really
really i have n't a bit of character
none at all
no
when i was a little boy i was taught to ride and be a gentleman -- at school it was a monastery i learned to pray and lie -- and ---
and
and then in the war to kill and hide
that 's all
and what do you do -- now
i 'm a gambler -- i 'm running at large like a happy pig devouring anything of life that pleases me i really belong in jail
oh
what a picture -- and what else
i 'm also a criminal and a hotel thief
that 's a silly joke
please look at me
you must believe me -- you must believe that i love you -- that i have never known what love is -- until last night
what is the matter
do you understand
yes -- yes -- yes
grusinskaya --
yes
you do believe that i really love you
yes -- if i did n't believe that i 'd die after last night
i want to be good to you -- madly good
suzette will be back here in a minute
i 'll go -- good bye
shall i see you again
i --
suzette will be back here any minute
when are you leaving berlin
very early in the morning
for vienna
ca n't -- ca n't you -- could n't you come too -- i think it would be better -- for us -- for us both
oh -- yes but -- later
why later
i have no money now -- i must get some first -- i must get some
i 'll give you what you need -- i have money
oh no -- that would spoil everything
i 'll -- i will manage somehow -- i 'll manage myself
i will go with you
when does the train leave
six twenty seven in the morning
but the money
never mind -- i 'll get it
i have a whole day
i 'll be on that train
you must go now
be careful on your way to your room
i 'll go
-- i love you
i 'll be on that train
i 'll get the money
do n't do anything foolish -- i 'm alarmed about you
do n't worry
i 'll be on the train
he leaves
bless you
are you coming to the theatre
oh -- i shall dance tonight -- how i shall dance -- i want to feel that you are in the theatre
i ca n't
no
no
i ca n't explain now
oh look -- the pearls
you wear them now
why do you think --
why
they 've brought me such good luck -- you --
i 'm worried about you
do n't
on the train
yes -- i will be on the train
till then
bless you --
thank you sir
not at all sir
permit me -- my name is kringelein -- from fredersdorf
i 'm baron von gaigern
oh a baron
baron we must have gone a hundred miles an hour at least
yes quite
we 've been together all day
and in an aeroplane
i 'm going to change and we 'll meet for a drink in the yellow room
in the yellow room where the music 's playing and the ladies are
where the music 's playing and the ladies are
hello -- sorry i 'm late
oh -- here you are baron
a drink -- a louisiana flip
hello mr. kringelein
how do you feel now
a little strange baron
a drink baron -- a louisiana flip
no thanks -- keeping my head clear
the baron is tired
no kringelein not tired -- just -- well -- well --
perhaps this evening baron we could go to the casino -- the place we passed with the marvelous bright lights
i 'd like to kringelein but i ca n't -- i am broke
broke -- a baron
but baron --
was the baron joking or is it really true that the baron is -- in financial straits
absolutely true kringelein and i have to raise some money immediately
if the baron -- if you would permit me --
what
i would be awfully glad to oblige you 've been so decent to me
three hundred
if i could get into a game i might win some
gambling
i 'd like that
i have over six thousand eight hundred marks with me
if we could scare up some men to play
we could come to my room
good
ready kringelein
ready baron
drink to me kringelein -- it 's my last chance
i do drink baron -- i drink to you baron and to win
it 's good -- come along baron
i take five hundred
all of that at once baron
here -- here it is
here 's your pocketbook kringelein
oh -- yes -- that 's it -- you found it -- you found it for me baron
goodnight kringelein
no -- no please -- oh do n't go -- do n't go -- do n't leave me alone baron
you 're all right now -- it 's very late -- goodnight kringelein
oh no stay here baron -- stay
good evening -- my key -- one sixty- eight
good evening mr. pimenov
oh -- good evening baron
how 's the beautiful lady
grusinskaya -- well to tell the truth baron -- tonight we are a little bit nervous
were you at the theatre last night
certainly -- always when grusinskaya dances
well -- last night was not so good
i thought she was splendid
yes -- but the audience
it 's always so quiet here
if you occupied the room next to madam grusinskaya you would appreciate the quiet of a hotel lobby
my dear sir i would gladly change rooms with you
no doubt you would baron
but do you know i 'm quite indispensable to her
i 'm her ballet master and her nurse
i hardly belong to myself anymore
but there you are it 's grusinskaya -- you ca n't help adoring her
the war
that is doctor otternschlag -- you know him
yes -- he always seems to be waiting for something -- and nothing ever comes
the war dropped him here and forgot him
yes i was in the war
perhaps you could present me now mr. pimenov
please baron -- forgive me -- not now -- here she is
i think it would be much better if you went away
we shall see who remains here the longer
as you will
aha
-- the baron
what do you want here
i must have made a mistake
made a mistake -- remarkable
we shall soon see if you made a mistake
stay here
give me that money
so that 's how we stand baron
look here sir -- i 'm completely at your mercy -- i 'm desperate -- it 's a matter of life or death -- i had to get some money -- tonight
indeed you must baron -- you must
humm -- humm but you must go to jail baron you 're a thief
be quiet
i 'm going to call the police
i 'm going to watch you play the great baron with the police
aristocrat
aristocrat
hello
hello
--
do n't do that
is that for me
no -- madam grusinskaya 's car is to be brought
madam grusinskaya 's car is to be brought
for me
no -- madam grusinskaya 's car is not to be brought
madam grusinskaya 's car is not to be brought
for me
no -- letters to two eighty
if a young woman a stenographer -- etc
the stenographer is to go up -- mr. preysing telephoned
mr. preysing -- one sixty four
any letters
no doctor
telegrams
no doctor
anyone asked for me
nobody doctor
any letters
no doctor
i came here from a long distance to stay at the grand hotel
i want a room -- a big room -- like you would give general director preysing -- i 'm as good as mr. preysing -- i can pay like mr. preysing -- would you give him a little room way up in the corner with the hot water pipes going -- bang -- bang -- bang
this gentleman can have my room
oh
send his bags up to my room
oh -- but -- i --
you 're tired
i can see that
yes -- yes -- i am tired
i have been ill
you are ill
i know -- i know -- when a man 's collar is an inch too big for him -- i know he is ill
yes -- oh -- oh -- yes --
you will stay doctor -- if you have nothing better to do
i have nothing better to do mr. kringelein
oh but doctor
is n't this wonderful
to live -- to live -- in the grand hotel
the grand hotel
oh but doctor
the music -- the champagne -- girls when they dance -- all the shining ice in those big silver things -- that 's life --
life
-- mr. kringelein you are drunk -- good night
but doctor --
life is changing you mr. kringelein
yes thanks to the baron
the best shops the very best
look doctor silk -- feels so nice on the skin
a london hat see -- made in england that 's silk too -- fifty marks
look the price is on it
that was half my salary before
the baron is a very fine gentleman -- no one in my life has been so nice to me as the baron
no pain mr. kringelein
pain
oh no doctor
i think if i had pain i 'd be too happy to notice it
excuse me gentlemen
i 'll take the bank -- all right gentlemen
over -- over so soon -- it has just begun
oh the pain
try and sleep kringelein do n't be afraid
i 'd like to live a little longer but -- i 'm not afraid to die -- i 'm not
there is no pocketbook here
on the floor probably
more than fourteen thousand marks
were in that pocketbook
fourteen thousand marks
one can travel -- one 's happiness might depend on fourteen thousand marks -- do n't you think so baron
oh i 've got to find it
stay where you are
no -- i must find it -- fourteen thousand two hundred marks
you 've nothing to fear kringelein
no
if i could trouble the baron to come and see this beautiful room
i have ordered champagne
perhaps the baroness could join us
waiter oh waiter
wait a minute
we are having caviar -- it 's expensive but that makes no difference -- i see the baroness is laughing
have caviar if you like but it tastes like herring to me
you may laugh
caviar and champagne may mean nothing to you but to me -- they mean a great deal
you see i 'm ill and all of a sudden i got a fear of missing life
i do n't want to miss life -- do you understand
you are funny
you speak of life as if it were a train you wanted to catch
yes -- and for me it 's going to leave at any minute
let 's drink
i 'm sure this beautiful room must appeal to your taste -- distinctive do n't you think
velvet upholstery -- a number one
i 'm in the textile trade and i know
and these are real silk drapes
silk -- think of that -- silk -- they are too
have you seen the bathroom
-- hot and cold running water -- you see i can get a bath whenever i like
you like music
yes -- it 's stimulating -- a man might --
a man might what
i do n't know -- i 'd like to do anything --
oh -- you would
dance then
she 's beautiful -- is n't she
you must look at my face and not at the floor
yes
you 're trembling
i never danced before -- in public
you dance splendidly
i 'm happy miss flaemm
really
for the first time in my life i 'm happy
please -- please
you do n't like to see me enjoying myself
quick -- mr. kringelein
oh -- what -- what --
oh -- oh miss flaemmchen
it 's you --
quick -- something awful -- awful has happened
go -- go at once -- mr. preysing --
preysing
what 's the matter
oh -- i was thinking -- poor baron -- lying there his eyes so open
you loved the baron did n't you
yes --
so did i. he was friendly to me as no man ever was
perhaps he really was a burglar -- but they do n't kill a man for that
he was in desperate straits
he 'd been trying to raise money all day
he laughed -- poor devil
and then a man like preysing kills him
i did n't like preysing right off
then why did you have anything to do with him
money
yes of course -- money
you do n't understand that do you
of course i do -- i never knew what money really meant till i started spending it
do you know -- i can hardly believe that anything so beautiful should come to me from preysing -- i 'll take care of you
will -- will you let me
what
you 'll have a good time with me
want to
i 've got enough money
ten thousand two hundred in my pocketbook
three thousand four hundred that i won
it will last a long time
i can win more -- we 'll travel
yes -- to paris
i wanted to go there always
wherever you like
here i 'll give you the money i won three thousand four hundred
later you can have more
later
when i -- i 'm ill flaemmchen -- it will not be long -- i 'll not last long
will you stay with me until
nonsense
we 'll find a great doctor he 'll cure you
they can cure anything these days
do you believe that you will have a better time with me than you would with preysing
oh yes of course
do you like me better
you 're a good man mr. kringelein -- a very good man
am i
is the bill ready -- the lady 's too
moreover --
moreover --
moreover
moreover
do you work in justice zinnowitz office
no -- only occasional jobs
tired
you pay me
you 're a very unusual stenographer --
moreover
moreover
i do n't see why it 's unusual for a stenographer to be pretty -- if she does her work well -- seems so silly
i do n't know why they do n't like girls like me in offices
personally i hate offices -- i 'd much rather be in the movies
movies
yes i photograph very well
look --
what is this
i got ten marks for that
you
me
you
moreover
what
only in mutual advantages -- moreover
what brown hands you have
that 's from skiing
skiing
yes
a man i know took me to switzerland last month
a man
-- to switzerland
-- that must have been nice -- for him
only in mutual advantages -- moreover
no
moreover the possibility of the successful termination of negotiations now pending with the manchester cotton company
not too quickly
what
you 're a little too fast
ca n't you understand me
i understand you perfectly
have you got it now
cotton company --
should throw a great weight into the balance
... weight into the balance
how nice -- your daughters
my daughters -- yes my daughters
is that mrs. preysing
definitely off
oh -- too bad
did you quarrel
that 'll be all -- be here tomorrow at nine o'clock
miss flaemm
hello
i must speak with you miss flaemm
presently mr. preysing
it 's urgent
come and dance with me mr. kringelein
i must speak to you miss flaemm -- business
tomorrow morning
no -- now
do you gentlemen know each other mr. kringelein -- mr. preysing -- baron von gaigern
now children no fighting -- save that for the office
let 's have our dance
i 'll remember you mr. kringelein
oh yes mr. preysing
sit here
cognac -- for you
nothing
i 'm going to keep an eye on that kringelein fellow
i 'll find out where he gets the money to hang around the grand hotel
well -- you want me
yes
well
i must go to england -- at once
well
you see i 'd like to take a secretary with me for my correspondence and -- humm -- humm -- for company on the trip -- i 'm nervous -- i need somebody -- i do n't know if you quite understand me
you said you have travelled with gentlemen -- and i mean --
i understand perfectly
what do you think your salary would be -- for such a trip
wait -- i must figure it up
first i 'll need -- clothes -- shoes -- it 's cold in england in march i 'll need a suit
you 'd want me to look nice
of course -- of course
a thousand marks --
it 's agreed -- i will get a room here for you
can you pay some attention to me
oh yes
insolent young cub
you mean baron von gaigern
baron
well he 's a gentleman
oh -- careful mr. preysing
call me -- do you know -- would you -- would you like to call me by my first name
oh no
why not
i could n't do that you 're a stranger to me
you 're a funny little creature flaemmchen
i ca n't make you out
it 's not funny at all
one ca n't get intimate just off hand
i could go to england with you and everything like that -- supposing i met you next year and i said how do you do mr. preysing
and you said that was the young lady who was my secretary in manchester
and ask me what it 's costing us to hammer it down
exactly
if the preysing people get the manchester contract we shall certainly merge with the preysing company -- but if they have n't they 're ruined -- preysing will have to declare himself
shhh -- here he is now
oh -- ho -- you want legal aid against us
-- the whole thing seems to me to be very simple
very simple -- i 've always liked the way you dressed preysing -- english is n't it
what we want to know about is manchester
yes mr. preysing -- that 's what we want to know
what
they turn out marvelous material in manchester
manchester -- yes
yes yes they do
yes -- now gentlemen shall we begin at the beginning
-- have we cigars -- water and everything
there 's a lot of business to be done with the manchester cotton company
they 've the whole english market right in their hands
have you any connections with -- manchester
we have a good many connections in england naturally
i mean with the manchester people
we are here to discuss our merger
naturally i can make no statement at this time
we must begin at the beginning
all right
since on the eleventh of june this year -- when the first negotiations for a merger between our respective firms was entered into -- both parties have fully agreed that this merger can result only in mutual advantages
oh -- yes -- i beg your pardon
i 'm laying before you the last general statement of our concern
active capital plant and machinery raw material and finished product -- for instance -- mop rags --
mop rags --
i 'd like to wait for justice zinnowitz before i commit myself
oh -- preysing preysing --
no water -- what a place
all you have to do is phone for it
i know you did -- i said you did --
and i said we did n't
evil days -- i 've shown you here -- -- my company exports to the balkans alone sixty five thousand marks worth of mop rags a year
mop rags -- mop rags -- we 're interested in something quite different
what
sorry preysing
you 've decided against the merger
yes --
then it 's all over
yes --
goodbye preysing i hope you pull through
this is a very bad time to be in such a crisis
we 've
why talk -- it 's over -- it 's over -- it 's finished
you 've broken off negotiations
you did it
you 're calling them off
you had nothing on your mind all day but manchester -- manchester -- manchester
you do n't suppose for one moment that i 'm such a fool as not to have something that i could say definitely about manchester
what
oh no -- no -- the session is over
let 's go it 's off
thank you gentlemen
if you actually have news from manchester then
gentlemen i am now free to announce
that the deal between my firm and the manchester cotton company has been successfully negotiated
preysing you 're joking with us
i thought we 'd suspended negotiations gentlemen
under these circumstances it 's quite a different matter
under these circumstances we might refuse to sign
see you soon preysing
next week we 'll meet and discuss further details
next week
how clear is manchester
foggy -- frightfully foggy always i 'm told
have you said anything about manchester mr. preysing
since on the eleventh of june of this year -- when the first negotiations for a merger
thank god we 're beginning at the beginning
as you remember it -- when you approached us
we did not approach you
here 's my signature -- here preysing sign here
what a session this has been
nine thirty mr. preysing keeps us waiting
he likes to play the great man
shall i tell them again
why waste time -- it 's getting late
you see -- what we are interested in --
ah come on -- we 're going home
you 're a deep one
in that case give us the articles
we 'll sign at once
we know all the details
always the performance -- every day the performance -- time for the performance
i think suzette i have never been so tired in my life
veronal did n't even help me to sleep
madam grusinskaya 's car is to be brought
i ca n't dance tonight --
it will pass -- it will pass -- come
let us cancel the engagement
but madam
can not do that
now is the time to cancel to stop entirely
i feel it -- everything tells me -- enough -- enough
mon dieu -- the pearls -- if they were to break --
the pearls wo n't break -- they hold together and bring me bad luck ---- i hate them
orchids come again madam -- no card -- i think perhaps they are from the same young man -- he is at the end of the corridor -- tall -- he walks like a soldier -- madam must have noticed how often he is in the elevator with us
last night for instance --
oh suzette -- suzette -- sshh -- quiet
good morning suzette
good morning madam
madam has slept well
oh yes suzette
madam will dress now it is late
five minutes suzette come back in five minutes
i 'll ring
yes madam suzette knows all about it
madam should sleep
i 've done my hair differently -- do you like that
when a lady falls in love she does her hair differently
in the middle of the night -- those flowers make me think of a funeral
laurels and tube roses
oh think suzette -- the villa and the sun at tremezzo -- quiet -- simple -- happy -- we 'll have a guest suzette
yes madam
and now madam will sleep
it is not long till the train
goodnight suzette
madam it is mr. meierheim -- he is waiting downstairs
where is pimenov
where is pimenov
what is this that you have cancelled your car
who am i that i should wait like a fool at the door
and here on a whim you cancel your car
have you forgotten there is a performance
do you know the time
or are we all mad
am i your manager
have we a contract
have we obligations
am i blind
or is that the time
i 'm cancelling the engagement
oh
oh
madam is cancelling the engagement
madam has chosen a funny time for such a funny joke
ha ha ha -- hurry come on
tonight -- there 's a line in front of the theatre since six o'clock
the house is jammed to the roof
the house is not full -- is it really full
packed to the ceiling
hurry -- get dressed
and what an audience -- the french ambassador -- american millionaires -- princess ratzville -- er -- er --
oh -- but it ca n't be
suzette -- i told you not to bring the pearls
i will not wear them tonight
why not
take them back suzette
you have n't time
hurry suzette
such nonsense
oh the sun -- it will be sunny in tremezzo --
every seat for the opening has been sold at vienna
sold out for three days
i know -- i know -- but it will be sunny in tremezzo
we 'll have a guest then
it is time for the performance
the performance -- the performance -- the performance
it is not stage fright -- it 's something more --
what -- what is it
last night
last night
there was no applause
there was -- there was
that theatre -- half empty -- dancing for those few -- i was frantic -- i finished -- the last beat and
i waited -- i listened -- but the applause did n't come -- nothing
a man in the box -- and just the claques behind -- it is passed pimenov
we are dead -- it 's finished
good morning pimenov
good morning gru -- your --
gru -- you are positively radiant
yes pimenov
one minute suzette i will call you
he will be on the train
but when did he go
how do you know
mr. kringelein will take room number one seventy six one of our most expensive rooms
it is large and on the front with bath
does that mean that the bath is my own
--- private
certainly sir
well now that 's very kind -- thanks
that 's what i want -- a large room on the front with a private bath -- yes that 's what i want
i can pay now if you like
will mr. kringelein kindly register
again
please
well now miss flaemm we can talk
some champagne miss flaemm
you may go mr. kringelein
does the world belong to you mr. preysing
what is this insolence
do you think you have free license to be insulting
believe me you have not
you think you 're superior but you 're quite an ordinary man
go away -- go away
who are you
-- an embezzler most likely
an embezzler -- you 're going to take that back right here in the presence of this young lady -- who do you think you 're talking to
you think i 'm dirt if i 'm dirt you 're a lot dirtier mr. industrial magnate preysing
you 're discharged
me
yes you -- shut your mouth -- get out -- you 're discharged
oh -- the baron -- the baron
he tried to rob me -- he is dead --
my best friend -- poor baron -- dead -- just like that
-- we must do something
yes the police must be called
no -- no -- wait -- the man was a burglar -- he was going to steal my money
oh no -- no -- not the baron
where is that girl -- she was working with him -- she enticed me into her room
her room -- oh -- i see mr. preysing -- i understand mr. general director preysing
i can answer for this it was self- defense -- i can answer for this -- but that girl -- the scandal -- my wife -- my daughters you know them
yes i know them --
the scandal -- we are men -- you -- you could take that affair of the young lady upon yourself -- take her and hold your tongue
then you can travel -- i 'll give you anything -- anything -- she was with you
we must call the police your excellency
how much -- how much do you want -- you need money -- you have nothing
do n't worry about me mr. general director pryesing -- worry about yourself
there has been a murder -- this is room one sixty four
if you will wait one moment sir
i wo n't wait -- i ca n't wait -- i waited three days before i got a room at all and what a room that is
it 's a very nice room and inexpensive sir
did i say i wanted a cheap room to live in -- when i came here did i ask for a cheap room
did i
just one moment sir
no i wo n't wait -- i ca n't -- every day is precious -- every hour -- every minute
the gentleman is dissatisfied with room number five fifty nine
i certainly have a complaint -- and a fair one
we will wait
you are late
hurry
four minutes past
please come
come lisaveta he will be there -- he will be there
madam grusinskaya 's car
ach
here you are doctor zinnowitz
have i kept you waiting
waiting -- i 'm waiting for news from manchester
no news yet
no
no word
everything depends on the manchester merger
i know -- i know
i saw gerstenkorn at lunch -- and as your lawyer i made it my business to broach the matter ---
no news from manchester yet -- do you think we ought to postpone the conference
good heavens no
that 'd create the very worst impression
you must be optimistic
you must convince them
you know as well as i do that the merger must go through
yes -- the merger must go through -- but i am used to making my deals on a solid basis
i am not a liar
i am an honest business man -- a good husband and father -- i have a sense of honor -- i have nothing to conceal
i could n't live happily otherwise
well do n't get excited about it
we agreed that the merger with the saxonia people must go through
i want to dictate my statement for tomorrow
i ca n't speak without notes
i like to have things down before me in black and white
i 'll see you in the morning then at the conference
everything'll be all right preysing
do n't worry
goodnight
good night
good morning gentlemen -- i see the conference is already underway
oh here you are justice zinnowitz -- i 'm at cross purposes with these gentlemen -- will you clear up the situation
but the situation is perfectly clear if you will allow me --
i can make no statement about manchester at this time
well -- gentlemen
next week
you let me talk till i 'm hoarse and you had manchester sewed up all the time
why
what 's the matter with you
bluff -- bluff -- all bluff
what 's bluff
that
deal with manchester definitely off
preysing oh -- i 'd never have thought it of you
no one would have thought it of me
i 've been getting rusty in fredersdorf
well if bluff is what the world wants i guess i can put up as big a bluff as anyone
from now on
you must go to manchester at once yourself and really see it through
yes -- i must go to england -- i was desperate -- now i do n't care -- this sort of thing goes to a man 's head
what you need is some relaxation
yes -- that 's what i want -- i 'd like to tear loose -- i 'd like a drink
i 'd like to go down to that dancing place
i 'd like to start something
i can understand that -- after your -- uh --
say it -- say it -- my lie -- it 's the first time in thirty years that i 've ever
where 's that stenographer
miss flaemm
what do you want with her
i want to see her i want to do some dictating -- report of the conference for my father in law
she had an engagement in the yellow room at five o'clock -- she was in a hurry
zinnowitz would you say she was pretty
pretty as a picture
let 's go down and find her -- i need a drink -- come along zinnowitz
i do n't know anything about women -- been married for twenty six years
bluff does it preysing bluff does it
goodnight
hi bobo
did i buy you that dress you piece of shit
one question
do you want to stick to that story or do you want to keep your teeth
i want to keep my teeth
now i 'll ask you another
you think i got no contacts out here
that nag paid off at just the opening price
there was n't hardly a flutter on the tote board from the time the odds were posted
there ai n't enough action to tickle the tote but you claim a ten grand win
you send me ten thousand dollars like i 'm some mark you can blow off
bobo no i --
you wanna talk to me straight up
my son --
your what
my son was in the hospital --
what the fuck are you doin with a son
he left home a long time ago
he was in the hospital up in los ang gleez real sick
motherhood
i never fucked up before bobo
you expect me to buy this
i got a lot of people work for me lilly
i ca n't have shit like this
it 'll never happen again
i swear
it happened once
with me that 's making a habit of it
you 're calling the shots
you got any kind of long coat in the car
anything you can wear home over your clothes
no
i 'll loan you a raincoat
you ever hear about the oranges
you mean the insurance frammis
tell me about the oranges lilly
you hit a person with the oranges in the towel they get big awful looking bruises but they do n't really get hurt not if you do it right
it 's for working scams against insurance companies
and if you do it wrong
it can louse up your insides
you can get puh puh puh
what 's that lilly
permanent damage
you 'll never shit right again
almost forgot
that ten grand of yours
it 's in the envelope by the door
oh thanks bobo
you want a drink
gee i better not if it 's okay
i still got ta drive back up to los ang gleez
see your son huh
well that 's nice
a side of you i did n't know lilly
he 's a good kid
a salesman
on the square huh
and how are you making out these days
stealing much
come on kid let 's see if there 's any food in the house
hah
evening
welcome to phoenix
good evening
i 'd like a single for tonight
oh everything 's the same size same price
i 'm a very light sleeper traffic noise keeps me wide awake all night
those trucks
i know exactly what you mean
do you have something around back facing away from the road
i 'll put you in one thirty one
very quiet
faces the desert
sounds perfect
i can park my car back there
right in front of the room
fine
and i 'll want to leave an early wake up call
no problem
my husband gets up the crack of dawn
it 's his kidneys
mary beth what we have here uh
oh i told mister hebbing all about it how brilliant you are at making money for your special clients
mary beth i hope you are n't spreading this good news too widely
well of course not
i know how dangerous this is
but i would trust mister hebbing with anything
would n't i darling
well i 'll have to take your word for it mary beth
here 's your money
goody
henry next time could n't mister hebbing --
mary beth
this has never been anything but --
oh i know i know and you 've been wonderful since i was widowed
but mister hebbing has-- -- you do n't mind my telling him darling -- -- suffered reverses
if he could
come take a look
an entire suite of main frame computer
we 're not really interested henry
you ruined me
you destroyed me
henry no
cole it 'll be all right
honey
ca n't move
it 's just the strain again the stress
we 'll take a vacation
it 's all hollow
nothing behind it
demon
demon
that 's why you can walk on it
demon
oh cole please
please come out of it
what would i do without you
well that 's what the law 's for is n't it
and i do n't just mean the sec
we could have the fbi breathing down our necks
i certainly hope not
loose talk is the one thing i worry about
i can keep my mouth shut mister fellowes
the tokyo exchange is nine hours ahead of us new york one hour behind
there is n't one hour of the day when both are open
information moves but it has to wait
now we have a young fellow working here -- do you know what a hacker is mister hebbing
one of those computer geniuses is n't it
you 're right
and this boy tapped into that main link between tokyo and the new york stock exchange
he can give us when it 's really useful a seven second delay in that movement of information
do you know what that means
well you 've got your information ahead of new york i see that
every once in a while a major change comes through
we have seven seconds to take advantage put our buy order our sell order into the computer in new york before the tokyo data comes in
not much time
we have to be ready
we have to have the money and we have to know what the information means and we have to move immediately
seven seconds
i do n't see how you do it
these machines -- they 're in here
here you are
two rich people
i must admit mister fellowes i had moments i was worried
you brought a case
good
bobo wants you to go on to delmar
delmar
i never go out to california
that 's a thousand miles from here
nine hundred
bobo needs somebody to handle playback this time
come on lilly you do n't argue with bobo
i know
take two three days
call when you get there
maybe i 'll swing around los ang gleez on the way
mrs. langtry i 'm sorry
why
what 's wrong
you are a valued customer as you know
but what 's wrong
i ca n't understand a thing like this
it 's something you almost never see
what is
this is some of the finest filigreed platinum i 've ever seen
but the stones no
they 're not diamonds mrs. langtry
but they must be
they cut glass
glass will cut glass mrs. langtry
do you know where it was purchased
it was a gift
it is n't worth anything at all
why of course it is
i can offer you -- well five hundred dollars
all right
i 'll get you a check
i hope you 're not too badly disappointed with us mrs. langtry
it 's not your fault
you 'll give us an opportunity to serve you again i hope
if there 's anything you think we might be interested in
i have only one thing now
are you interested
well i 'd have to see it of course
you are seeing it
you 're looking right at it
whadaya say
hello
kaggs
home office
roy dillon
i know that
knew it when i saw you out there
the best salesman here which is n't saying much
want to talk to you dillon
what 's up
that was a pretty backhanded compliment
if i let people get away with things like that i would n't be a good salesman
you 're right
i apologize
but i still want to talk to you
lead on
what
me
that 's just the first year
if you are n't worth a lot more than that the second year i 'll kick you out
what do you say
well uh
no
no
i ca n't take that job
i mean i mean i ca n't take it right away
i 'm still recuperating i just dropped in to say hello see everybody --
i did n't realize
yeah you do look a little pale
how soon will you be ready
a week
but you need a man right now
it would n't be fair to you to --
i take care of the being fair to me department
things've gone to hell this long they can go a little longer
well
see you in a week roy
i can call you roy
oh sure
fine
and i 'm perk
short for percy i 'm afraid
perk
good to have you back roy
i was just looking at --
mr. kaggs i 'm sorry
you 're turning me down
makes no sense roy
i guess i 'm just not a leader of men
oh come on roy
the truth is mr. kaggs --
perk remember
okay fine
perk the truth is i like things the way they are now
pick my own hours have time for uh other activities
a well rounded life
i respect that
but it has to have a center roy something you care about something you can think about
maybe i 'm just not ready for that yet
well roy if that 's the way you feel i wo n't badger you
do n't want to lose you as a salesman too
oh i 'd like to stay on
just keep everything the way it was
that 's what we 'll do then
but i tell you what roy
before i hire anybody else i 'll ask you one last time
fair enough
fair enough
so what 's your story today
they twisted my arm
only one arm
they knocked out my tooth
only one tooth
sure i am
what made you turn up after all these years
i 'm working down in san diego
just for a few weeks
thought i 'd drop in on my long lost son
nice to see you
what am i doing in here
well
you 're all right now i guess
i have to get down to the track
thanks uh lilly
do n't mention it
i guess i owe you my life
you always did
not as tough as you huh
no
and you have to be
up to you
my boss is a guy named bobo justus back in baltimore
when a long shot gets too much action i have to put money on that horse at the track because it 's the only way to get the odds down
sure
the first day of the delmar meet there was a nag called bluebell
i should have been on it
but that was the day after you came in here so i stuck around to see how you were gon na be
that was my choice nothing to do with you
i took a chance and it did n't work out
bluebell came in
i sent bobo ten grand of my own money like it was the winnings from my bets
i hoped that would cover me
it did n't
lucky
you call that lucky
he let me live
he let me be his friend
you do n't put up with that
nobody has to put up with that
you do if you 're where i am
where you want to be
how 'd you get that punch in the stomach roy
i tripped over a chair
get off the grift roy
why
you do n't have the stomach for it
i just give you your life
what you do with it is up to you
that 's right
roy
what are you doing in san diego
myra and me come down to lajolla for the weekend
expecting visitors
no
that was the point
you ought to put a bandage on that
no can do
have to dip in and out of my bag too much
besides it 'll heal in the air
i thought
i was hoping we could play it straight with one another
i guess not
you 'll be heading east from here huh
after the meet
back to baltimore
well
nice to see you again lilly
you too roy
well sure roy
you want me to drive up --
okay fine come on down
it wo n't be a home cooked meal you know
well that 's good news
going somewhere
somewhere else that 's for sure
i just came back from phoenix
oh yeah
is the frame holding
looks very solid lilly
sit down
take a minute tell me about it
i 've really got to --
you 're dead lilly it worked
not for long
not when they do a fingerprint check
why should they
the cops are satisfied
bobo wo n't be
he 'll spend the money to make sure
even so
you still got time
relax a minute tell me what happened
sit down
myra followed you huh
she must have been the one that blew me off with bobo
i guess to get me running
did you tell her about my stash
no
no you would n't
that 's what she was after though
but why hit on me
i would n't go in on a deal with her
she blamed you for it
as though you do what i say
that 's pretty funny all right
what happened in phoenix
i sat in there with her i thought what do i do now
run and i 've got bobo and the law after me
stay and how do i explain
this way 's perfect
it is is n't it
and maybe it 's a break for me after all
i 've been wanting out of the racket for years and now i 'm out
i can make a clean start and --
you 've already made a start
does n't look that clean though
you want a drink
i do n't think so
you probably should n't either
no but i 'm goddamn thirsty
ice water
yeah sure that sounds nice
i 'll get it
you do n't know what i 'd do roy
you have no idea
to live
oh you 'll live lilly
i know what 's bugging you of course
oh
i did n't know anything was
oh really
you 've got a legitimate complaint roy i do n't deny that
i was n't a very good mother when you were a kid
not very good
a bad mother
by any standards
i 've thought about it you know from your side since then
i know just how bad i was
uh huh
i wonder did you ever think about it from my side
never
no i guess not
it was pretty lousy of me i guess to be a child at the same time you were
not to stop being a child just because i had a child
i guess i was a real stinker not to be a grown up when you needed a grown up
what do you want me to do
pin a halo on you
you 're doing a pretty good job of that yourself
and making you feel bad at the same time huh
but that 's the way i am you know the way i 've always been
always picking on poor little roy
for god 's sake lilly
i gave you your life twice
i 'm asking you to give me mine once
i need the money
no
you 're getting off the grift
that 's right
that 's good
you do n't really belong on this side of the fence you know
i do n't
if you stayed a crook do you think you 'd live to be my ripe age
i do n't see why not
well i guess i got it wrong then
seems to me i heard about a guy just your age that got hit so hard in the guts it almost killed him
well uh
sure sure that does n't count
that 's different
well it does n't matter does it
i 'm getting out
and that 's why you 've got to get rid of this money
if you keep it around it 'll just make you think how clever you are
it 'll be a temptation to get back into the game
oh that 's it
you 're stealing my money for my own good
how very motherly of you lilly
if i should get out of the racket that goes double for you
that 's why you 've got to change your life completely go to some town get a square job live like a john yourself
if you try to do it your way what future is in it
a future
the only future i 've got
that money would n't last forever
and then what
you 'd be back in some other part of the rackets
another bobo justus to slap you around and burn holes in your hands
this way you 've got to go the square route
you could send me a card when you 're settled i could maybe help out sometimes
that 's what it is is n't it
keep me down
your turn to be in charge have the power
just trying to help lilly
lilly jesus what are you doing
is there nothing i can do roy nothing at --
no
you heard the shower did n't you
i do n't care about that
this time i got ta have the rent
joe i thought i was gon na be all right by now i just need a little more --
it is n't the owner myra it 's my wife
she knows what 's going on
this time i got ta have the money
joe you know you 'll --
joe could we talk it over
do you want a drink
my wife sent me here myra
for the money
she 's waiting
i 'll have it tonight
nine o'clock
ten
this time
we 'll work something out joe
i did n't teach you that
you taught me a lot
then i invented
let me see how you did that one
scram
go home
i ca n't
i just left home
you 're too young
you should be in school
i am in school
where 's the five
in your other hand
well well
in a real hurry are we
always for you baby
roy
mm
look at me
oh i am baby believe me
roy
it this all we have
all
it ai n't bad
no more than this
what are you talking abut myra
marriage
i did n't say that
you are n't marriage material
ow
hey what are you trying to do throw me off my game
no baby
come to mama
you were bleeding inside honey
remember that bruise you had
you called the doctor huh
well no roy
your mother found you
oh yeah
thanks
how long do they say i 'm in here
her job
i want to know everything about you
you do
and once i 'm out of here i 'll remind you of the best parts
i do n't see why you 're still here
you look healthy to me
i just do what the doctor says babe
you 're just comfortable that 's all
you do n't even ask to go home
you just lie around let your mama take care of you
mama
who else is paying for all this
you badmouth the woman all the time but you sure do take the payoffs she gives you
i 'll pay lilly back do n't you worry about that
i do n't like to come here roy
every time i do your mother comes in and makes remarks
that 's just lilly 's way
and you never defend me
you 're afraid of her
oh do n't be stupid
you 're a mama 's boy if you want the truth
get well soon
every day in every way
i 'll see you when you get home
i do n't see why we have to take the train
because it 's comfortable
no
see you soon
you were right i had to get out of that hospital
nothing wrong with me any more
i 'll sign that affidavit
great to get away take it easy
next week i 'll get back to work
you already went back to work
what
i watched you
working the tap on those soldier boys
working the what
oh come on roy
the tap
what you do for a living
i 'm a salesman
you 're on the grift
same as me
myra i 'm not following this
roy you 're a short con operator
and a good one i think
do n't talk to me like i 'm another square
you talk the lingo
what 's your pitch
the long end
big con
nobody does that single o
i was teamed ten years with the best in the business
cole langley
i 've heard the name
it was beautiful
and getting better all the time
is that right
it is roy
and now right now it 's the perfect time the best time since i 've been in the game
he did n't think they were risks
he was so good roy he could just play with the mark
and when he got serious
he 'd explain he had to have cash so there would n't be any paper trail for the sec
and a lot of cash or it was n't worth while
the least we ever took was forty thousand and the most was one hundred eighty five thousand dollars
from one sucker
i thought these people were broke
no no roy just cash poor
they had savings accounts stocks to sell houses to mortgage
sell their wife 's jewelry
oh they had a lot of money when they put their minds to it
or when i put their minds to it
i stayed with them that 's the roper 's job made them get up every penny they could raise turn it all over to cole
and a month later the sucker calls the cops and you 're on the run
no no
he never calls the cops not after we give him the blow off
yeah
how
oh roy it was great
we were rolling in dough lived wherever we wanted only pulled two or three scams a year
what happened to cole
he retired
where
upstate
upstate where
atascadero
that 's where they keep the criminally insane is n't it
i just bet you are too
and now you 're trying to rope me
join up with you
i watched you roy i 've been watching you wondering if i should talk about this at all or maybe just
take a hike you mean
i need a partner roy
i need an inside man and you 're it
you could be as wonderful as cole
i do n't know myra i never had partners
i never needed them
not to take soldiers for a hundred bucks
but how about taking a bank president for a hundred grand
think about it
okay
sure
you -- i do n't know
if you could have seen your face when i told you good night
you looked so so
ah
oh come here
you were gone for a while
i went out to delmar
the track
did you run into lilly
i saw her
she did n't see you in other words
i 'm not trying to make trouble roy
it 's just she 's always so nasty to me i thought who is she to be so high and mighty
i saw her out there and i called a friend of mine in baltimore so now i know who she is
you must have some very knowledgeable friends
i 'm well connected roy cole introduced me to a lot of people
very valuable
valuable for us
running your broker scam you mean
you and me roy
what a team we 'll make
we think alike we get along together
once or twice a year we take some slob the rest of the time we live like this
you wo n't regret this roy
regret what
i did n't say i was coming aboard
but why not
i thought it was settled
what 's holding you back
come on myra do n't talk business here
this is time out
you mean it would be too tough to give me a turndown here
easier on home grounds
yes or no
they 're both easier at home
okay
and hello to you too
i called a fellow i know in tulsa the one who plays my chauffeur
there 's a sucker there he says is made for us
and a boroker that just shut down we can use their office not change a thing
now i can scrape up ten grand without much trouble
that leaves fifteen or twenty for your end
we could start this weekend get the sucker into position --
wait a minute
when did this happen that we 're partners
what
the last i looked we were just talking things over
but the setup 's there
it 's there now
i do n't think i need it
you 're too good for the small time roy
move up to where there 's big dough to be made and you do n't have to stick your neck out every day
maybe i like it where i am
do n't i get any say in this
no
because i --
that 's what i say
what
what i say is no
we do n't do partners
for christ 's sake why not
mostly because you scare the shit out of me
i 've seen people like you before baby
double tough and sharp as they come and you get what you want or else
but you do n't make it work forever
bullshit
no history
sooner or later the lightning hits
i do n't want to be around when it hits you
what is it
what 's going on
i 'm happy the way i am
by god it 's your mother
it 's lilly
what
sure it is
that 's why you act so funny around each other
what 's that
do n't act so goddamned innocent
you and your own mother gah
you like to go back where you been huh
you watch that mouth
i 'm wise to you i should have seen it before you rotten son of a bitch
how is it huh
how do you like --
not that it matters
this is the morgue
you up to it now
sure
let 's get it over
one thing i have to caution you about
a gunshot wound
yes i know i know
well uh you know she ate the gun
what
i 'm sorry that 's an unfortunate phrase it slipped out i 'm to tell you the truth mr. dillon this is n't an everyday occurrence around here
ate the gun
oh
someone who knows her well could still identify her that 's not the problem
it 's just there 's uh it 's likely to be a shock
well let 's get the shock over with
not many laughs in this room eh
not many
oh jesus
no question huh
no its -- why did she--
that 's that then
oh yeah
that 's that
mr. simms
why yes mr. dillon
here 's a potential new neighbor looking at--
uh huh
mrs. langtry may drop by
well thank you
and thank them
sickness comes to us all mister dillon
that 's true mr. simms
we never know when and we never know why
we never know how
the only blessed thing we know is it 'll be at the most inconvenient and unexpected time
just when you 've got tickets to the world series
and that 's the way the permanent waves
well i 'm back now
i just wanted you to know
got ta rush
happy to see you looking so good
no thanks i 'm not thirsty
it 's for your cigarette
i prefer not to contaminate my crime scene with micropollutants
why am i here
they said on the phone you were assigned to the meyers case
with all due respect detective you ca n't go blaming every brutal murder in illinois on michael meyers
pamela whittington was a long time associate of dr. loomis
her home office was ransacked
it was chock full of loomis files on meyers
it 'd say that makes meyers a suspect would n't you
well when you put it that way
right
so why do n't we get on with this investigation
i like a woman who takes control
the killer knocks the knife out of her hand with the wrought iron poker
broken blood vessels on her right forearm
as which point she drops to her knees in pain
explaining the low height of the blood splatter on the curtains
impressive blake
where 'd you learn how to do that
girl scouts
carter
it 's blake
meet me at grand view
where
the cemetery
yeah alright
i 'll be there in ten
you take all your dates here
blake
only the real stiffs
i can be real stiff
charming
that 's it
care to join me
come on carter
you know it 's michael
what do you want me to do put out an a.p.b. on a man in overalls wearing a white mask dragging a headstone
yes
sweet dreams blake
carter
it 's blake
how do you feel about wisconsin
we 're sorry to startle you miss tate
the door was open so we let ourselves in
mind if we sit down
i 'd prefer you did n't
i 'm very busy
okay then how 'bout we ask you a few questions
detective
carter
... i think it would be best if you both left
might want to stop and think about the safety of your students miss tate
i never stop thinking about it detective
the only way in or out of this school is through that gate and it is secured at all times
funny we just drove right in
well i can assure you it wo n't happen again
thanks for your concern
goodbye
bruce
what 's going on
the kids are here to pick out their costumes for the festival
better take 'em to virgil 's downtown
we got a dead body in there
a dead body
it 's amy kramer
my god
pretty messy
parents have already been notified
our office has been trying to get a hold of you
do you know who did this
well eddie catero did n't show up for work this morning
parents say he never came home last night
car 's still missing
think eddie had something to do with it
does n't look good
besides it 's historically inaccurate
what the fuck are you talking about
michael meyers never used a meat cleaver
it was a butcher knife
who are you the serial killer police
what difference does it make
it 's not historically accurate that 's all
another historical inaccuracy
would somebody shut this guy up
hey mis whittington what 's up
my blood pleasure
you scared the hell out of me
oh
sorry
i 'm on my way to the ring and --
i think someone broke into my house
no shit
no shit
jimmy what are you doing
checking out your place
no
wait for the police
and miss the big game
no way
what the --
betcha did n't predict that
i 'm sixteen keri
i should be able to live wherever i want
and i should have a son who calls me mom
looks like we 're both shit out of luck
okay you win
i 'll call you mom
now can i move into the dorms
no
well dad thinks it 's okay
you 're father thinks it 's okay to run off to cancun with a blonde bimbo in a halter top
somehow his opinion does n't count
i promise not to run off to cancun
forget it
the dorms are only fifty feet away
you could practically see into my window
so what difference does it make
my point exactly
see we both agree
alright i was wrong
there is a big difference between rooming with your buddies and living with your mother and school headmaster
i took the padlock off your door
what more do you want
my life is a living hell
where are you going
to the bathroom
can i do that alone or do you want to watch
i thought you 'd never ask
you 're twisted
i know
shit john
what the hell were you doing out there
nothing
you 're kidding with that answer right
i just went for a walk
it 's no big deal
wrong
there are rules in this house and you 're going to follow them whether you like it or not
or what
you 're gon na shoot me
it 's an option
well maybe if you 'd let me live in the dorms i would n't have to sneak out to spend time with my friends
oh so now it 's my fault
just forget it
i 'm sorry alright
it was just a stupid joke
will sit down
wait a minute
slow down
you 're telling me michael meyers is my uncle
yes
any other psychotic relatives i should know about
jason
freddy krueger
no
why did n't you tell me
i was trying to protect you from this
where are you going
i do n't know
he found you did n't he
get on the bus
where 's molly
she 's not in her room
just get on the bus
i 'm not leaving without her
john you ca n't help her now
what
where is she
john
oh god
no
not molly
please get on the bus
yeah me too keri
call me laurie will ya
keri
laurie
how about if i just call you mom
that would work
shelve the barf bag
it 's the key to the main gate
where 'd you get it
swiped it from my mom 's desk yesterday
you stole it
i borrowed it
not me
why not
i ca n't afford to get caught
nah i did n't tell her where i went
is that all you guys can think about
amy never came back last night
maybe she 's in trouble
you look kind of cold
i 'm okay
here take my jacket
better
yeah
molly of all the people
if i ca n't trust my resident assistant then what
i know
i 'm really really sorry miss tate
please let me keep the job
it 's the only way i can afford to stay here
okay tell you what
you can still be the school r.a. but no dance tomorrow night
okay
thank you
linda
he killed linda
who
michael meyers
are n't they doing a terrific job this year
looks great
it does
you okay
you seem a little off
nothing a good stiff drink ca n't fix
it 's john is n't it
it 's always john
still wants to move out
he 's been living out of moving boxes for three months
this kid just wants his freedom
it 's not going to happen
the tighter you squeeze the harder he 'll try to break free
oh please
you get that out of a fortune cookie
does n't make it bad advice
i 'm going into town
run a few errands before dark
need anything
a box of fortune cookies
i 'm running out of advice
bye will
hey you alright
what
what are you looking at
i 'm fine
i just need to lie down
no will this is n't the alcohol talking
it 's the truth
i ca n't believe this is happening
shit happens
you just dropped a shitload on him
give him some time to digest it
are you going to leave too
never
so you 're really michael meyers sister
yeah
do we have to invite him to the wedding
not a real fan of halloween humor will
oh right
sorry
i 'm gon na head back to the office
finish up some things
ca n't it wait till monday
i thought maybe we could dance
i 'm very light of my feet
keri you all right
we 've got to get these kids out of here
i 'll make sure there 's no kids left in the dorms
look they 're staring right at us
you think your mom knows we snuck out last night
wait
what is it
i have to pee
ca n't you hold it
ca n't you
you aced it did n't you
i did alright
better her than me
you 're unbelievable
ooooh busted
big time
and news travels fast
would n't be surprised if the whole school knows about this one by tonight
shane 's going as a condom
i thought you were allergic to latex
i 'll pop a benadryl
you think they 'll let him in dressed like that
oh they 're so stupid
i 'll just tell them he 's going as a sausage casing
blaaaaaggghhhhh
shit linda
you 're so easy
was n't scaring the hell out of me once today enough
nope
hey you think i 'll win scariest costume
linda you are without a doubt the scariest person on campus
thanks
where 's shane
condom boy is waiting for me in the cafeteria
but the dance is in the gymnasium
very insightful
let the party begin
have enough fun for the both of us
oh do n't be such a victim
he do that to you
another episode of daddy knows best at the strode house
pig
what the hell happened this time
beth who 's that guy that lives across the hall from you
why
you interested
no
i keep seeing him staring out his window
watching me
you mean tommy
yeah on the weirdness scale he 's about an eleven
supposedly some scary shit happened to him when he was a kid
messed up his head
he 's harmless though
probably just lonely
mom -- who is this
kara
no this is beth
what are you doing there
where 's my mother
we were worried about you guys so we left early to see if you were --
is tim there
he 's in the bathroom
happy fuckin halloween
someone 's trying to scare us out of having this fair
and it 's not gon na work
seven thirty is the costume pageant
carving jack o'-lanterns at eight
photos for the school paper at nine
then harry lights the tree at nine- thirty
i just know i 'm forgetting something
relax
everything 's cool
did n't i tell you harry would be here
jesus that 's my neighbor
tommy
is n't he that psycho who 's been spying on my sister
kara and danny never showed up tonight
we 'd better go home and check on them
there 's nothing else for us to do here
but they 're gon na light the tree in a few minutes --
we can light our own tree at home
guess they -- went to the fair after all
guess so
what if your parents come home
then they can watch
are n't you gon na answer that
answer what
what if it 's kara
shh
mommy 's here
what is it
the voice man
he 's here
home is here in grandma and grandpa 's new house
at least while i 'm in college
remember our deal
the kids at school said this is a haunted house -- that a bad man used to live here
they did did they
since when did we start listening to the kids at school
but i 've seen him
you 've been watching too much tv
he says things
bad things
like what
come on mom
we 're gon na miss all the fun stuff
danny you 're just going to have to wait
mommy i 'm scared
there 's nothing to be scared of baby
it 's just another storm
try to get some sleep
i ca n't
the voice man is coming to get me
no one 's coming to get you
not while i 'm around
promise
i promise
mommy
danny
shitheads
defacing my property
i showed them
relax john
they were just kids
kids are what 's ruining this country
everywhere you go it 's the same
no goddamn respect
see what i 'm talkin about
you 'll never pass that exam on an empty stomach kara
what is it this time
a man came by the house
a psychiatrist by the name of loomis
he told me about the terrible things that happened here
in our house
what the fuck are you doing letting strangers in without --
john they sound jamie lloyd this morning
someone tried to kill her
what in god 's name are you talking about woman
when are you gon na stop listening to those damned talk shows
i 'm getting the children out of here
at least until we know what we 're dealing with
john i want you to come with us
debra you 're fuckin insane
you knew did n't you john
you knew
i 've been knocking
the door was open
is everything all right in here
who are you
i 've come to help your family
so they 're trying to kill you and your baby
do n't tell me
your name also happens to be rosemary
no -- please listen
they 're coming
coming for me and my baby
come on sweetheart -- what is this
who 's coming
it 's
michael
michael myers
so they 're trying to kill you and your baby
do n't tell me
your name also happens to be rosemary
no please listen
they 're coming
coming for me and my baby
come on sweetheart -- what is this
who 's coming
it 's
michael
michael myers
she was n't here when i brought danny home from --
danny go downstairs -- now
my god
what have you done to him
i did n't -- he got in a fight and i --
you stay away from him
do you know how insane this is
who am i supposed to be looking for
him
god what 's wrong with him
here
let me try
kyle 's mother might be dead for all i know
now i 'm afraid he could be next
why would anyone want to kill an innocent baby
not just kyle
all of you
his entire family
here
look at this
where are you going
to find the rest of your family before michael myers does -- or whoever 's been controlling him
danny
danny
mrs. blankenship have you seen the little boy who came in with me and --
where 's the baby
he 's gone
danny
danny where are you
kara no
what now
wait a minute
come on
it 's not working
christ what a night
not even so much as a sign for five miles on that road
that 's the whole idea of living in the country
i thrive on the seclusion
unlike you sam i learned many years ago not to second guess the motives of my fellow man
remember what freud said sometimes a cigar is just a cigar
or in this case a drink is just a drink
i hope you did n't come all the way out here in this storm just to quote freud
as always your keen powers of perception astound me
and you 're right
i 've come to celebrate
after thirty two years as psychiatric administrator guess who has been named smith 's groves new chief of staff
but surely rogers is n't --
retiring
it was her voice
on the radio
it was jamie
calling for me
you do n't know that for sure
it could have been anyone
a practical joke
kids
it was jamie lloyd
she came back as i knew she would one day
and whatever has brought her back has brought michael back as well
after six years
sam she died with him in that explosion after the --
that 's what someone wants us to believe but i tell you michael is alive
i feel him
i sense the evil that lives inside just as i did all those years as i watched him
sitting behind these very same walls
staring
growing stronger
as my colleague as my friend please
i ca n't go through this again
not alone
i need your help to stop him
notify haddonfield 's sheriff tell him we 're on our way
i want the entire staff on alert
we go to code red lockdown for twenty four hours
if he is alive i plan on bringing him back
or what 's left of him
what is that
it 's a sign
he 's come home
sam do n't -- let them take care of her
i 'm here now jamie
you 're going to live
you have to
there you are
who was that boy
an old friend
there 's more people moving eastbound down old reservoir road past the elementary school
any word on the location of the strodes
no one 's home
checked it out myself
good
i want around the clock surveillance on that house
what 's wrong
what 's happened to jamie
i 'll meet you over there
where 's the child
sam you know you never fail to amaze me
yesterday happily retired today right back in the thick of things
somehow i knew you still had it in you
no
stay away sam
leave the boy
take me
yes
dr. loomis thank god you 're here
you heard her did n't you
it was jamie
i 'm sorry but do i know you --
i 'm tommy
tommy doyle
laurie strode -- jamie 's mother -- she was baby sitting for me that night --
yes
tommy
what are you doing here
please -- just tell me the truth
has michael myers come home
what do you know about michael
i know he 's alive
people in this town -- they want us to believe he 's dead
but i know
i 've always known
right now at least one girl is dead and jamie lloyd is in there fighting for her life
she is the last of his blood line
if she dies --
no dr. loomis
she 's not the last night
who else knew i had the baby
no one
no -- there had to be someone else
who knew
only me -- -- and dr. wynn
run tommy
run
no
miss me baby
i dunno boy
hm
it 's a bitch
a bitch
did n't recognize you
we 've never met
i wonder who 'll recognize us first
they 'll wet their pants
i hope the men do
i would rather the women did n't
i 'm gon na wet my pants
home sweet home
one thing anyway -- at least penelope did n't throw out all your crap
i bet alice threw out all my crap after i 'd been gone a week
we 'll see
you know what gets me
oh shit
how everybody says fuck and shit all the time
i used to be scared shitless i 'd say fuck or shit in public by accident
now everybody says fuck and shit fuck and shit all the time
something very big must have happened while we were out of the country
looseleaf -- will you get the hell home
at least we found the diamonds
at least
i 'd really feel stupid if we did n't bring anything back home
it 's enough that you 've brought yourself home
i wish you 'd tell alice that
and that goddamn mrs. wheeler
tell them yourself
you do n't know my mother in law boy
after eight years in the jungle with you i know mrs. wheeler better than i know anybody in the universe
i did n't tell you everything
the time we were in a tree for fourteen days you certainly tried to tell me everything about mrs. wheeler
i did n't even scratch the surface
you 're lucky boy
you come home and nobody 's here
when i go home everybody 's going to be there
this room is full of ghosts
you 're lucky boy
my house is gon na be filled with people
you know what gets me
go home
thank god we found the fucking diamonds
the hell with the diamonds
you were rich before
this is the first time i was ever rich
go home
show them how rich you are for a change
can i have the cadillac
take the cadillac and drive it off a cliff for all i care
what 'll you do for transportation
i 'll buy a hundred more cadillacs
go home
you know what gets me about that cadillac
go home
when i drive it i feel like i 'm in the middle of a great big wad of bubblegum
i do n't hear anything i do n't feel anything
i figure somebody else is driving
it 's a bitch
go home
i 'm liable to find anything
that 's the point
walk in there and find whatever there is to find -- before alice can cover it up
i know i know
i dunno
at least she 's in the same house
sure was spooky looking in the window there and there she was
so long colonel
you know what gets me
let 's talk about it some other time
how short the skirts are
good night colonel
it 's been beautiful
something very important about sex must have happened while we were gone
you know what gets me
those guys who went to the moon
to the moon boy
leave me alone
after eight years of horrendously close association the time has come to part
i crave solitude and time for reflection-- and then a reunion in privacy with my own flesh and blood
you and i may not meet again for months
months
i 'm certainly not going to come horning back into your life tomorrow and i will not welcome your horning back into mine
a chapter has ended
we are old comrades -- at a parting of the ways
i 'm lonesome already
i 've been looking at motorcycles
go home
you ever own a motorcycle
you 're right
we 'll take a trip
a trip is what we 'll take
i do n't want to talk about motorcycles
i do n't want to talk about tits
go home
have n't got one
and how were things
let 's talk about something else
otherwise how are things
i sure did n't expect her to drop dead
could have happened to anybody
first nagasaki -- now this
how about breakfast wife
i dunno boy
the educational process
i guess
you 're lucky you do n't have any old people around here
she was about to get married again
she locked me out of the bedroom last night
go to the funeral
of course
not only go to it but go to it in full uniform
rent a uniform
that 's against the law is n't it
i ca n't wear a uniform anymore
wear your uniform and every decoration and let them despise you if they dare
alice would be absolutely tear ass
when i was a naive young recruit in spain i used to wonder why soldiers bayoneted oil paintings shot the noses off of statues and defecated into grand pianos
i now understand it was to teach civilians the deepest sort of respect for men in uniform-- uncontrollable fear
to our women
i did n't know we had any women left
the world is teeming with women-- ours to enjoy
every time i start thinking like that i get the clap
i told you the uniform would n't help
it helped more than you know
down deep people were deeply affected
you keep on saying deep and deeply
i wish something good would happen on the surface sometime
so kid -- how they hanging
or do n't you say that to a little kid
he 's a man
tell him you 're a man
of course you 'll go
you 're going to fly the helicopter
i dunno
you 're so low
look at that beautiful red meat
you have n't touched it
sorry
at least you 've got a place to come back to
i do n't have a place to come back to anymore
all the more reason to go to africa
i dunno
you know
i used to really love that alice
do you know that
you know her for what she is now-- garbage
i dunno
she was always a rotten wife
she was against everything manly you ever wanted to do
he was the most daring test pilot in the country at one time and his wife made him quit
she made him become a life insurance salesman instead
hi penelope
shut up you ninny
you were never to come here again-- for any reason whatsoever
go live in a safe deposit box -- with your things
looseleaf jesus -- i would n't want to be married to him
you know
what 's this
i would n't want to be married to me
we 're too crazy
you know
in what way pray tell
i did n't like that violin thing
that was sad
tit for tat -- as simple as that
you never played a violin
you did
yeah
i practically forgot
but after you busted that thing i got to thinking jesus -- maybe i 'll start the violin again
that did n't just belong to woodly
that belonged to everybody
maybe he would have sold it to me and i could have some fun
after you busted the violin boy and penelope walked out i thought to myself jesus -- who could blame her
maybe it 's time you got out
me
you
okay
okay
you 're an imbecile
i know you think that
everybody thinks that
anybody who 'd drop an atom bomb on a city has to be pretty dumb
the one direct decisive intelligent act of your life
i do n't think so
it could have been
if what
if i had n't done it
if i 'd said to myself screw it
i 'm going to let all those people down there live
they were enemies
we were at war
yeah jesus -- but wars would be a lot better i think if guys would say to themselves sometimes jesus -- i'm not going to do that to the enemy
that 's too much
you could have been the manufacturer of that violin there even though you do n't know how to make a violin just by not busting it up
i could have been the father of all those people in nagasaki and the mother too just by not dropping the bomb
i sent 'em to heaven instead -- and i do n't think there is one
goodbye looseleaf
hello
how are you honeybunch
is penelope in
the posies are for her
i wanted to apologize
you 've come to the right man
i forgot my vacuum cleaner
i forget mine for years on end
oh my god-- and you are looseleaf harper
i ca n't get over how you guys are my friends
harold ryan and looseleaf harper are my friends
our pleasure
eight years you guys were together-- through thick and thin
for seven and a half of those years we were heavily drugged -- or we would have been home long before now believe me
we were saved from starvation by the lupi loopo indians who fed us a strange blue soup
blue soup
it sapped our will -- made us peaceful and unenterprising
it was a form of chemical castration
we became two more sleepy indians
what an awful sound
get used to it
back door paul
it 's possible of course that you 'll die in africa
i 've considered that
selling vacuum cleaners is n't the best preparation you could have
i just want one true adventure before i die
that can be arranged
fifty years
you 're making a joke
i 'm interested in long term expectations
it 's engineered to last about fifteen years
things
oh -- you silly people and your things
things things things
if i were married to him i sure would n't walk out
never mind the condition of your body and your spirit
look after your things your things
who 's going to fly our helicopter now
what
we got to get another pilot
for what
for africa
do you really think that harold ryan would go to africa with a vacuum cleaner salesman
you invited me
to make an ass of yourself
what went wrong
we 're ahead of schedule that 's all
you 're finding out here what you would have found out in africa-- that you are a rabbit born to be eaten alive
gee whiz--
it would have been fun to see you drop your rifle and run the first time an elephant charged us
i would n't drop my gun
you 're hollow like a woman
i 'm smarter than looseleaf
he can shoot
he can hold his ground
he can attack
you 're in your proper profession right now-- sucking up dirt for frumpish housewives closet drunkards every one
how do you know how i 'd act in africa
look how you 're acting now
this is a moment of truth and you 're almost crying
slug me
you 're my buddy
out
out
no matter what you say to me i still think you 're the greatest guy i ever knew
out
you -- you are n't going to have any friends left if you do n't watch out
thank god
anybody home
as a matter of fact--
sir
as a matter of fact -- i am home
hello
hello
are you--
you were about to ask a question
are you -- do you--
ask it
do you know who wanda june is
life has denied me that thrill
do you mind if i ask who you are
mind
god yes i mind
i 'm your father 's friend
a man claiming to be the family physician let me in a while ago
dr. woodly
dr. woodly
i should make a little list
is anybody besides you here now
the doctor was called away on an emergency
i think it was birth
where 's mom
you do n't know where your mother is
does she put on a short skirt and go drinking all night
she went to the fight with herb shuttle i guess
you think you could find me a pencil and paper
i 'll see
and you 've been roaming the streets while your mother is god knows where
i was going to a funny movie but i changed my mind
if you 're depressed laughing does n't help much
when did you know my father
man and boy
everybody says he was so brave
even this--"herb shuttle you said
he worships father
ah
and what sort of man is this worshiper
he 's a vacuum cleaner salesman
i see
and he came into the apartment one day to demonstrate his wares and your mother as it happened was charmingly en deshabille--
she met him at college
college
they were in the same creative writing class
college
she has a master 's degree in english literature
what a pity
educating a beautiful woman is like pouring honey into a fine swiss watch
everything stops
and the doctor
he worships your father too
he insults him all the time
excellent
what 's good about that
it makes life spicy
he does n't do it in front of me but he does it with mother
you know what he called father one time
no
harold the patron saint of taxidermy
what does he do -- of an athletic nature
nothing
he plays a violin in a doctors quartet
aha
he has a brilliant military record i 'm sure
he was a stretcher bearer in the korean war
were you in a war with father
big ones little ones teeny weeny ones -- just and otherwise
tell me some true stories about dad
dad
dad
the boy wants tales of derring do
name a country
england
oh hell
dad was never in england
behind a desk for a little while
a desk
they had him planning air raids
a city ca n't flee like a coward or fight like a man and the choice between fleeing and fighting was at the core of the life of harold ryan
there was only one thing he enjoyed more than watching someone make that choice and that was making the choice himself
ask about spain where he was the youngest soldier in the abraham lincoln brigade
he was a famous sniper
they called him la picadura"--"the sting
the sting
as in death where is thy sting
he killed at least fifty men wounded hundreds more
the sting
ask about the time he and i were parachuted into yugoslavia to join a guerrilla band -- in the war against the nazis
tell me that
i saw your father fight major siegfried von konigswald the beast of yugoslavia hand to hand
tell me that
tell me that
hid by day -- fought by night
at sunset one day your father and i peering through field glasses saw a black mercedes draw up to a village inn
it was escorted by two motorcyclists and an armored car
out of the mercedes stepped one of the most hateful men in all of history -- the beast of yugoslavia
wow
we blacked our hands and faces
at midnight we crept out of the forest and into the village
the name of the village was mhravitch
remember that name
mhravitch
we came up behind a sentry and your father slit his throat before he could utter a sound
uck
do n't care for cold steel
a knife is worse than a bullet
i do n't know
the story gets hairier
should i stop
go on
we caught another kraut alone in a back lane
your father choked him to death with a length of piano wire
your father was quite a virtuoso with piano wire
that 's nicer than a knife is n't it -- as long as you do n't look at the face afterwards
the face turns a curious shade of avocado
i must ask the doctor why that is
at any rate we stole into the back of the inn and with the permission of the management we poisoned the wine of six krauts who were carousing there
where did you get the poison
we carried cyanide capsules
we were supposed to swallow them in case we were captured
it was your father 's opinion that the krauts needed them more than we did at the time
and one of them was the beast of yugoslavia
harold the beast was upstairs and he came running downstairs for his men were making loud farewells and last wills and testaments -- editorializing about the hospitality they had received
and your father said to him in perfect german which he had learned in the spanish civil war major something tragic seems to have happened to your bodyguard
i am harold ryan of the united states of america
you i believe are the beast of yugoslavia
wants to fix up her makeup no doubt
is looseleaf harper alive
alive and hale
he 's throwing a little surprise party for his own family
is your mother often this unstable
penelope
she 's a real heavy sleeper sometimes
why do n't you go to bed -- son
i ca n't take my eyes off you
tomorrow 's another day
paul you know what my english literature teacher said about you
ca n't it keep till morning
she said you were legendary
i wrote a theme about you and she said your father is a legendary hero out of the golden age of heroes
that 's nice
you thank her for me
go to bed and get lots of sleep and then you thank her in the morning
tomorrow 's saturday
anyway she 's dead
penelope
she was killed in the park two months ago -- in the daytime
penelope
she was on her way home from a meeting of the african violet society and they got her
will you go to bed
yes sir
if you ca n't wake mom up i 've got double decker bunks
scat
dad 's got jungle fever mom
what 'll i do
mom
damn
mom
play
your mother and i do not wish to be disturbed for three full hours
a hundred dollars
the smallest thing i 've got
can i get dressed first
make it fast
dad--
could n't you have vanished quietly out the back door
a hundred dollars for breakfast
leave a tip
what kind of exercise
beat the shit out of someone who hates you
i 'm a man
we 've got to do something to make this boy 's voice change
i wonder if we could n't get bull balls somewhere and fry 'em up
still miss your mother
no
you 're free to go to her if you want
if you 'd rather be a woman and run with the women just say the word
dad
who was it
it 's mom
that 's a cartridge if i 'm not mistaken
gunpowder bullet cartridge case and fulminate of mercury percussion cap -- all set to go
paul i was cleaning it
pick up that cartridge and slip it back into the chamber -- where it belongs
gee whiz dad--
welcome to manhood you little sparrowfart
load that gun
dad--
too late
it 's man to man now
protecting your mother from me are you
protect her
then speak by god
can you fight with words
i do n't want to fight you
get mad
tell me you do n't like the way i treat your mother
tell me you wish i 'd never come home
it 's your house dad
everybody simply evaporates
there are guest issues to be fought out here -- or to be argued at least
the enemy the champion of all who oppose me is in east st. louis with his mother and his aunt
i have so far done battle with a woman and a child and a violin
i do n't know what i hope
but i do n't think you care what i hope anyway
you do n't know me
you do n't know her either
i do n't think you know anybody
you talk to everybody just the same
i 'm talking to you gently now
yeah
but it 's going to get loud again
how do you do
my name is penelope ryan
this is a simple minded play about men who enjoy killing -- and those who do n't
i am harold ryan her husband
i have killed perhaps two hundred men in wars of various sorts -- as a professional soldier
i have killed thousands of other animals as well -- for sport
hamburger heaven
heaven
can i help you sir
i think so daughter
how old are you
eighteen-- and a half
a springbok an oryx a gemsbok -- a gazelle
sir
raw hamburger please -- and a whole onion
i want to eat the onion like an apple
do you understand
yes sir
it was a very unusual automobile
it was a cadillac but it had water buffalo horns where the bumpers should be
and what to drink
what time do you get off work my child
i 'm sorry sir i 'm engaged to be married
my boyfriend would be mad if i went out with another man
did you ever daydream that you would one day meet a friendly millionaire
i 'm engaged
daughter -- i love you very much
you do n't even know me
you are woman
i know woman well
this is crazy
destiny often seems that way
you 're going to marry me
what do you do for a living
my parents died in an automobile accident when i was sixteen years old
they left me a brewery and a baseball team -- and other things
i live for a living
i 've just come back from kenya -- in africa
i 've been hunting mau mau there
some kind of animal
the pelt is black
it 's a kind of man
how do you do
how do you do mrs. ryan
i 'd heard you were beautiful and so you are
am i intruding here
not at all
i could n't help overhearing that you were about to get married again
what 's the matter
give us time
like hugging a lamp post
give us time harold -- to adjust to your being alive
you were well adjusted to my being dead
we adjust to what there is to adjust to
perhaps paul being young can adjust to joy or grief immediately
i hope he can
i will take a little longer
i 'll be as quick as i can
what sort of time period do you have in mind
half an hour
an hour
i do n't know
this is a new disease to me
disease
situation
this reunion is n't what i imagined it would be
a telegram -- a phone call might have helped
seemed the most honest way to begin life together again -- natural unrehearsed
well -- enjoy the natural honest unrehearsed result -- surgical shock
you feel that you 're behaving as a woman should
every fuse in my nervous system has been blown
you know what i want
i want you both to be friends
i know you both respect you both
you should be friends
nothing would please me more
thank god
i 'm so glad you like each other
i was so scared so scared
have some
harold
i could carve a better man out of a banana
please--
you and your damned bedside manner and your damned little black bag full of miracles
you know who filled that bag for you
not alice sit by the fires like yourself
men with guts filled it by god -- men with guts enough to pay the price for miracles -- suffering ingratitude loneliness death--
he does n't deserve this
you do n't know him
it is n't fair
he thought he could take my place
it is now my privilege to give an unambiguous account of why i do n't think he 's man enough to do that
awful
i ca n't tell you how sorry i am
say hello to your mother
do say hello to your mother
now that 's what i call fun
ghastly cruel unnecessary
you 'll get so you enjoy twitting weaklings again
you used to eat it up
i did
we were one hell of a pair -- and we 'll be one again
what we need is a honeymoon
let 's start right now
a trip you mean
i had a trip
we 'll honeymoon here
go out and play
he has n't had breakfast yet
buy yourself breakfast
there we go
honeymoon
honeymoon
say it honeymoon
it 's so -- so stark
you used to like it stark
just -- bang -- we have a honeymoon
i 'm not going to strike you
i am going to be as gentle as pie -- as lemon meringue pie
you must n't run away now
this is your loving husband approaching
i 'm your husband
society approves
i have some change
ram it up your ass
breakfast
scrambled eggs kippered herring fried potatoes -- and a whole onion
i want to eat the onion like an apple
do you understand
and lots of orange juice -- oceans of orange juice
mrs. wheeler is dead
all right -- bring me a side order of mrs. wheeler
oh hell -- sit down colonel
penelope will bring you some chow
that is the most heartless statement i ever heard pass between human lips
which one
bring me a side order of mrs. wheeler
she 's up in heaven now
she did n't hear
she is experiencing nothing but pure happiness
there 's nothing nicer than that
chow
harold ryan wants chow
what a honeymoon
honeymoon temporarily canceled
the boy should still go out and exercise
i have the impression he never gets any exercise
he simply bloats himself with fig newtons and bakes his brains over steam radiators
you 're wrong
then let me see him go out and get some exercise
right now
chow chow chow
god damn it-- nutriment
we 're all going to have to go out for breakfast
the cook quit yesterday
you 're a woman are n't you
cook by god
cook
you 're the nigger now
people do n't use that word any more
do n't lecture me on race relations
i do n't have a molecule of prejudice
i 've been in battle with every kind of man there is
i 've been in bed with every kind of woman there is -- from a laplander to a tierra del fuegian
if i 'd ever been to the south pole there 'd be a hell of a lot of penguins who looked like me
cook
you leave me so -- so without-- without dignity
people now have dignity when frying eggs
they do n't have to feel like slaves
then go now -- and fry with dignity-- sunnyside up
i should have torn that door off its hinges
should have scrogged her ears off
should have broken the bed
what do you want
well
i -- i was wondering -- is there anything you should n't eat -- because of jungle fever
i could eat a raw baby crocodile
the way to get your wife back is in bed
do such a job on her that she 'll be lucky if she can crawl around on all fours
we 're starving
do you mind
let me guess -- breakfast is served
no
what then
i do not wish to be scrogged -- ever
i never heard that word but when i heard it i knew it was one thing i never wanted to have happen to me
that 's what you 're supposed to say
this is not a coy deception
i do not want to be scrogged
i want love
i want tenderness
you do n't know you want
that 's the way god built you
i will not be scrogged
i remember one time i saw you wrench a hook from the throat of a fish with a pair of pliers and you promised me that the fish could n't feel
it could n't
i 'd like to have the expert opinion of the fish -- along with yours
fish ca n't feel
well i can
some injuries spiritual or physical can be excruciating to me
i 'm not a silly carhop any more
maybe you 're right about fish
when i was a carhop i did n't feel much more than a fish would
but i 've been sensitized
i have ideas now -- and solid information
i know a lot more now -- and a lot of it has to do with you
such as
the whole concept of heroism -- and its sexual roots
tell me about its sexual roots
it 's complicated and i do n't want to go into it now because it 's bound to sound insulting -- even though nobody means for anybody to be insulted
it 's just the truth
i like the truth
i would n't be alive today if i were n't one of the biggest fans truth ever had
well -- part of it is that heroes basically hate home and never stay there very long and make awful messes while they 're there
go on
and they have very mixed feelings about women
they hate them in a way
one reason they like war so much is that they can capture enemy women and not have to make love to them slowly and gently
they can scrog them as you say-- for revenge
you learned this in some college course
i learned a lot of things in college
actually -- it was norbert who told me that
the doctor
yes
and what is his most cherished possession
his most cherished possession
his violin i guess
and he keeps it in his apartment
yes
and no one 's there now
i do n't think so
that 's too bad
i would rather have him at home -- to see what i 'm going to do
what are you going to do
he did his best to destroy my most precious possession which is the high opinion women have of me
i 'm now going to even that score
i 'm going to break in his door and i 'm going to smash his violin
no you 're not
why not
because if you do -- i'll leave you
harold goodbye
i came for my clothes
sneaking in the back door
i rang
it seemed like the proper door for a servile worthless organism to use
your clothes are at the city dump by now
perhaps you can get a map from the department of sanitation
i came for paul as well
if he wants to go
you took him to the funeral i hear
he 'd never seen a corpse
he 's seen a dozen now
a dozen
it 's a big and busy funeral home
did you like it dear
it is n't a matter of liking
it 's a matter of getting used to death-- as a perfectly natural thing
would you mind leaving
no woman ever walks out on harold ryan and then comes back -- for anything
unless she has nerve
more nerve than the doctor i must admit
he has n't been home for two days
has he suddenly lost interest in sleep and color television -- and the violin
he knows you shattered his violin
i 'm dying to hear of his reaction
the thrill of smashing something is n't in the smashing but in the owner 's reactions
he cried
about a broomstick and a cigar box -- and the attenuated intestines of an alley cat
two hundred years old
he feels awful loss -- which was precisely my intention
he had hoped that someone would be playing it still -- two hundred years from now
hope
testimonials of that sort are -- are beyond my range
i do n't do them well
that 's a failing i know
i see
see how you 've upset him
he was so merry and hale before you came home
how unhappy he 's going to be -- alone in his room
he 'll play with his rifle i expect
that will cheer him up
rifle
i bought him a twenty two yesterday -- on the way home from hamburger heaven
and where is the good doctor
have you two feathered a love nest somewhere
he 's in east st. louis with his mother -- visiting an aunt
last i heard his mother was going alone
he 's afraid of you harold
he knew you 'd want to fight him
he does n't know anything about fighting
he hates pain
and you a supposedly healthy woman do not detest him for his cowardice
it seems highly intelligent to me
what kind of a country has this become
the men wear beads and refuse to fight -- and the woman adore them
america 's days of greatness are over
it has drunk the blue soup
blue soup
an indian narcotic we were forced to drink
it put us in a haze -- a honey colored haze which was lavender around the edge
we laughed we sang we snoozed
when a bird called we answered back
every living thing was our brother or our sister we thought
looseleaf stepped on a cockroach six inches long and we cried
we had a funeral that went on for five days -- for the cockroach
i sang oh promise me
can you imagine
where the hell did i ever learn the words to oh promise me
looseleaf delivered a lecture on maintenance procedures for the hydraulic system of a b-36
all the time we were drinking more blue soup more blue soup
never stopped drinking blue soup
blue soup all the time
we 'd go out after food in that honey colored haze and everything that was edible had a penumbra of lavender
sounds quite beautiful
beautiful you say
it was n't life it was n't death -- it was n't anything
beautiful
seven years gone-- like that like that
seven years of silliness and random dreams
seven years of nothingness when there could have been so much
like what
action
interaction
give and take
challenge and response
he 's a child
with an iron penis three feet long
load it boy
you 're begging him to kill you
if he thinks he 's man enough
that 's really what you want
you become furious when people wo n't make you dead
i 'm teaching my son to be a man
so he can kill you
you hate your own life that much
you beg for a hero to kill you
i plan to live one hundred years
no you do n't
if that 's the case -- what 's to prevent my killing myself
honor i suppose
what a handsome word
but it 's all balled up in your head with death
the highest honor is death
when you talk of these animals one by one you do n't just talk of killing them
you honored them with death
harold -- it is not honor to be killed
if you 've lived a good life fought well--
it 's still just death the absence of life -- no honor at all
it 's worse than the blue soup by far-- that nothingness
to you though it 's the honor that crowns them all
may i continue with the rearing of my son
load that gun
the old heroes are going to have to get used to this harold -- the new heroes who refuse to fight
they 're trying to save the planet
there 's no time for battle no point to battle anymore
i feel mocked insulted with no sort of satisfaction in prospect
we do n't have to fight with steel
i can fight with words
i 'm not an inarticulate ape you know who grabs a rock for want of a vocabulary
call him up in east st. louis penelope
tell him to come here
no
no
and my son the only son of harold ryan -- he 's going to grow up to be a vanisher too
i do n't know
i hope he never hunts
i hope he never kills another human being
you hope this too
i 'm going to call the police
do n't
this is suicide
go get the police
stop
no we wo n't
no matter how it begins it will end in death
because it always does
is n't that always how it ends harold -- in death
there has to be a threat of some sort nobility of some sort glamour of some sort sport of some sort
these elements are lacking
how do i load
load it for her
all right
am i exceedingly dangerous now
the national safety council would be appalled
then listen to me
you 're both disgusting -- with your pride your pride
i hate you for coming here -- like a federal marshal in a western film
i loved you when you stayed away
but here you are now -- high noon in the superbowl
you fool you fool
she 's right norbert -- go home
woodly i have n't said all i have to say
out
give me that goddamn thing
now get out of here or i might kill you
who knows
you 've killed women
seventeen of them -- eleven by accident
march
move
you too
norbert -- you come too
let him go harold
let him go
of course he can go -- if he 'll just go down on his hands and knees for a moment -- and promise me that he does not find me comical in the least degree
do it norbert
ooops
ooops
can i -- uh -- help you gentlemen
gentlemen -- that 's nice
you startled me
the door ws unlocked
is it always unlocked
it 's always locked
but here you are inside are n't you
you're -- you're old friends of harold ryan
we tried to be
we tried to be
he 's dead you know
dead
such a final word
dead
did you hear that
hello
oh -- hello mother
hello mother
... who
did she say how far apart the pains were
when was that
oh dear
oh dear
call her back -- tell her to head for the hospital
tell the hospital to expect her
i 'll leave right now
yes
yes
the boy
one boy
and what exactly is your relationship to mrs. ryan
neighbor
doctor
i live across the hall
and you come into mrs. ryan 's apartment as often as you please looking into various health matters
yes
please
you 've got to get out right now
just her neighbor and doctor
that 's all
and her fianc
and her fianc
how nice
i hope you 'll be very happy -- or is that what one says to the woman
i 've got to run
you wish the woman good luck and you tell the man how fortunate he is
that 's how it goes
i 've literally got to run
i wo n't try to keep up with you
i 'm not as fast on my feet as i once was
safe and sound i see
oh -- you came back
i came back
how was the emergency doctor
profitable i hope
a policeman delivered the baby in a taxicab
tough luck
you 'll have to split the fee
are -- are you crying penelope
she 's crying because she 's so happy
i feel the same way
what next
what next
you leave promptly of course
there is no question as to whose home this is--
none
whose son this is whose wife that is
a fianc is the most ridiculous appurtenance this household could have at this time
good night
good night
ah
you 're ambulatory
what a brilliant diagnosis
well now -- what seems to be the trouble with the patient today
a touch of malaria perhaps
i know malaria
malaria is n't caused by the bites of bats
you 've been bitten by bats
colonel harper and i once shared a treetop with a family of bats
there was a flash flood
there were piranha fish in the water
that 's how colonel harper lost his little toe
you have chills
chills fevers sweats
you can describe it and name it after yourself the woodly galloping crud
good lord
i can just hear the editorial wee- wee weeing when looseleaf and i start flying in pacqualinincheewa root
i can hear the alice sit by- the fires now we discovered it in the amazon rain forest
now we cure you with it
now we lower our eyes with becoming modesty as we receive heartfelt thanks
i thought she was a widow
you were wrong you quack
i 'm going to have to report you to the department of health
what for
quarantine possibly
you may be suffering from a loathsome disease which the american people could do without
goodbye
it died for your sins
this little corpse is intended as a lesson
there 's a certain amount of information there
lest we forget how cruel you are
this is man to man
it 's healer to killer
is that the same thing
what brought you back
the same hairy humorless old gods who move you from hither to yon
honor if you like
he 's a champion after all
woodly of the corpses and cripples you create for our instruction -- when all we can learn from them is this how cruel you are
there 's going to be no bloodshed here
i know how he 'll fight -- the only way he can fight with words
the truth
am i correct
yes
i can defeat him with anything from flavored toothpicks to siege howitzers
but he got it into his little head that he could come here and demolish harold ryan with words
the truth
correct
correct
what an hallucination
oh dear dear dear dear
oh dearie me
you have n't heard me yet
you intend to crack my eardrums with your voice
will i bleed from my every orifice
who will clean up this awful mess
we 'll find out now wo n't we
you 're a filthy rotten bastard
oooooo
that hurt
you 're old -- so old
now who 's being cruel
a living fossil
like the cockroaches and the horseshoe crabs
we do survive do n't we
you 're going to have to apologize of course for calling me a bastard
that 's a matter of form -- not allowing you or anybody to call me a bastard
no rush about that
just remember to apologize sometime soon
you 're a son of a bitch
yes -- well -- uh -- that 's another one of those statements which more or less automatically requires an apology
whenever you feel like it
it 's sort of like turning off an alarm clock that 's ringing loudly
your apology turns off the alarm
you 're in one hell of a jam
you realize that
i 'm high as a kite
glands
you 're supposed to be happy when you die
call me comical again
you 're a clown
you 're a clown who kills -- but you 're a clown
i love you
have a cigar
evolution has made you a clown-- with a cigar
simple butchers like you are obsolete
i 'm to be left behind -- in primordial ooze
if you 're at home in the ooze and nowhere else
this is going to become very physical
are you prepared for that
you 're not such a creature of the ooze that you 'd hurt an unarmed man
i 'm an honorable clown
king arthur
you hope
in any event i will not beg for mercy
no quarter asked
no quarter given
do n't you laugh even inwardly at the heroic balderdash you spew
cut me open
find out
i 've struck my blow
with spittle
i 've poisoned you
harold lucretia borgia
something i drank or touched
you refused a cigar
that 's it
potassium cyanide in the humidor
treacherous lover of peace
i put a poisoned thought in your head
even now that poison is seeping into every lobe of your mind
it 's saying obsolete obsolete obsolete and clown clown clown
poison
you have a very good mind or i would n't have come back
that mind is now asking itself cleverly and fairly is harold ryan really a clown
and the answer is yes
i -- i really must congratulate you
something is happening in there
you can never take yourself seriously again
look at all the creatures you 've protected us from
did you shoot them on the elevator as they were on their way up here to eat us alive
no
woodly the magic root you gave me -- i had it analyzed
it was discovered by a harvard botanist in 1893
he explored your famous jungle for five years armed with nothing but kindness a talent for languages and a pocketknife
i see
you are n't going to hurt me
you are n't going to hurt anybody any more
any violent gesture will seem ridiculous -- to yourself
don quixote
my violin is avenged
something seems to have happened to my self respect
and the hell with it
it was so tragically irrelevant so preposterously misinformed
the new hero is you
i hate crowds and i have no charisma--
you 're too modest
but the new hero will be a man of science and of peace -- like me
he 'll disarm you of course
no more guns no more guns
was i ever of use
never
for when you began to kill for the fun of it you became the chief source of agony of mankind
here
finish the job
i 'm utterly satisfied
you 're making a mistake
obsolete old carnivores like me are most dangerous when wounded
you 've wounded me
more clowning
do n't you see
we never quit fighting until we 're dead
you 'd be killing a friend
do n't you know how much i like you
i 'm going to shoot you now
no
my self respect is gone -- and my soldier 's honor with it
it is now very easy for me to shoot an unarmed man
new dignity can be yours -- as a merciful man
you can change
like the saber toothed tiger
oh god -- you're really going to kill me
harold it wo n't hurt as much as the sting of a bumblebee
heaven is very much like paradise they say
you 'll like it there
can i beg for mercy -- on my knees
if you want to be found that way
what is this thing that kills me
man as man was meant to be -- a vengeful ape who murders
he will soon be extinct
it 's time it 's time
do n't shoot
i 've enjoyed being man
no
no
get up
no
have it your way
we 'd both be better off dead now
ca n't do it
thank god
harold crawl home
thank you -- for my life
it 's trash now like mine
new lives begin
somewhere in this city
not here not here
tell penelope i loved her -- in my clownish way
and paul
tell him to be a healer by all means
what are you going to do
use the sanitary facilities if i may
leave the rifle here
i 'll put it in paul 's room where it belongs
give me your word of honor that that 's all you 're going to do
for what it 's worth now harold ryan the clown gives his sacred word
jesus -- i dunno
you know
what the heck
who knows
colonel harper retired now dropped an atom bomb on nagasaki during the second world war killing seventy four thousand people in a flash
i dunno boy
you do n't know
it was a bitch
thank you
you can leave now
we 'll begin
and you went home unannounced too
i dunno
yeah
yeah
yeah
i did
alice got married again
she did
you did n't even find that out
there was so much going on
she married an accountant named stanley kestenbaum
so that 's it
kestenbaum kestenbaum
everybody was yelling kestenbaum kestenbaum
i thought it was some foreign language
so long you guys
what will you do colonel
i dunno
marry the first whore who 's nice to me i guess
get a job in a motorcycle shop
so long you guys
mr. ryan just borrowed my birthday cake
i do n't really know him
thought you were another wife maybe
i 'm only ten years old
that 's what he wanted -- a ten year- old wife
he 'd come home from a war or a safari and he 'd wind up talking to the little kids
wo n't you please join our club
please
honey -- alcoholics anonymous takes all the time i 've got -- and harold ryan is an individual i would rather forget
he drove me to drink
he drove his first two wives to drink
aha
hello
you 're mildred right
i heard you were looking for me
you were harold ryan 's third wife
right
yes
you want to join the harold ryan fan club
wear a pink jacket with a yellow streak up the back
do i have to
who 's the little girl
because he was cruel
premature ejaculation
ach soooooooooo
mildred no grown woman is a fan of premature ejaculation
harold would come home trumpeting and roaring
he would the kick the furniture with his boots spit into corners and the fireplace
he would make me presents of stuffed fish and helmets with holes in them
he would tell me that he had now earned the reward that only a woman could give him and he 'd tear off my clothes
he would carry me into the bedroom telling me to scream and kick my feet
that was very important to him
i did it
i tried to be a good wife
he told me to imagine a herd of stampeding water buffalo
i could n't do that but i pretended i did
it was all over -- ten seconds after he 'd said the word buffalo
then he 'd zip up his pants and go outside and tell true war stories to the little kids
any little kids
that is sad
is it
i have this theory about why men kill each other and break things
ja
never mind
it 's a dumb theory
i was going to say it was all sexual
but everything is sexual
but alcohol
peace
she 's my date tonight
what do you want her to do -- bring the poor old jaguars back to life with a bicycle pump
bugger off
ask paul what he thinks
your mother looks beautiful -- right
kid
does n't your mother look nice
paul
i do n't care what she wears
something 's made you sore
do n't worry about it
you bet i 'll worry about it
i said something wrong
it 's my father 's birthday -- that 's all
that 's all
who cares about that
i had not the slightest inkling
why did n't you say so
she does n't care
she 's not married any more
she 's going to have fun
i hope you have so much fun you can hardly stand it
dr. woodly -- i hope you make up even better jokes about my father than the ones you 've said so far
kid -- kid--
and i wish you 'd quit touching me all the time
it drives me nuts
what 's this
do n't
you sure misunderstood something-- and we 'd better get it straight
explain it to them
i 'm bugging out of here
do n't touch me
get out of the way
men can touch other men and it does n't mean a thing
have n't you ever seen football players after they 've won the superbowl
i worship your father
that stuffed alligator your mother gave me -- the one he shot
it 's the proudest thing in my apartment
everybody talks about how rotten kids act
grownups can be pretty rotten too
thank god
what a relief
and this is my son paul
he was only four years old when his father disappeared
he 's coming back mom
he 's the bravest most wonderful man who ever lived
i told you this was a simple minded play
maybe he 'll come back tonight
it 's his birthday
i know
stay home tonight
oh paul--
you 're married
you 've already got a husband
he 's a ghost
he 's alive
not even mutual of omaha thinks so anymore
if you have to go out with some guy -- can't he be more like dad
herb shuttle and norbert woodly-- ca n't you do better than those two freaks
thank you kind sir
a vacuum cleaner salesman and a fairy doctor
a what kind of doctor
a fairy -- a queer
everybody in the building knows he 's a queer
that 's an interesting piece of news
you 're the only woman he ever took out
not true
still lives with his mother
you know she has no feet
you want him to abandon his mother who has no husband who has no money of her own who has no feet
how did she lose her feet
in a railroad accident many years ago
i was afraid to ask
norbert was just beginning practice
a real man would have sold her to a catfood company i suppose
as far as that goes j. edgar hoover still lives with his mother
i did n't know that
a lot of people do n't
j. edgar hoover plays sports
i do n't really know
to only exercise dr. woodly ever gets is playing the violin and making that stupid peace sign
peace
peace
peace everybody
i hate that thing
it 's beautiful
where will you be
anywhere but here
i 'd just sit here and cry about the way my father 's been forgotten
are you and dr. woodly engaged
who have you been talking to
what difference does that make
is dr. woodly going to be my father now
yes he is
aaaaaaaaaaaaaah
is norbert still here
no
then who flushed the toilet
father 's friend
what 's his name
do n't know
for heaven 's sakes
mom
that man is your father
what
there stands the loins from which you 've sprung
i do n't get it
it is you is n't it harold
that 's why i 'm crying
dr. woodly
you know who this is
peace everybody -- paul penelope
you 're taking mom out tonight
you 're going out
we do n't have a maid any more
oh
everything stays as it is
a monument to a man who thought that what the world needed most was more rhinoceros meat
my father
i apologize
but you did n't know him and neither did i. how 's your asthma
do n't worry about it
how 's the fungus around your thumbnail
it 's fine
it 's jungle rot
this room is making everybody sick
this is your family doctor speaking now
here -- i brought you something else to hang on your wall for the sake of variety
i hate that thing
keeps fairies away
it came yesterday
i have n't opened it yet
maybe it 's supposed to end now
maybe god would n't have it any other way
i did n't get his name
a friend of your father
he is n't any friend of father
he is n't
he is my father
no
please--
he 's not anybody to tell somebody else what to do in a master bedroom
i 'll get ready herb
i did n't expect you this soon
please -- won't everybody be nice to everybody else while i 'm gone
i keep having this nightmare -- that he catches us
doing what
he 'd kill me
he 'd be right to kill me too -- the kind of guy he is
or was
we have n't done anything wrong you know
he 'd assume we had
that 's something i suppose
all through the day i 'm so confident
that 's why i 'm such a good salesman you know
i have confidence and i look like i have confidence and that gives other people confidence
people laugh sometimes when they find out i 'm a vacuum cleaner salesman
they stop laughing though when they find out i made forty three thousand dollars last year
i 've got six other salesmen working under me and what they all plug into is my confidence
that 's what charges them up
i 'm glad
i was captain of the wrestling team at lehigh university
i know
if you want to wrestle you got lehigh
if you want to play tennis you go to vanderbilt
i do n't want to go to vanderbilt
you do n't wrestle if you do n't have supreme confidence and i wrestled
but when i get with you and i say to myself my god -- here i am with the wife of harold ryan one of the great heroes of all time--
gentlemen
is this right for a fight
it 's been so long
beautiful
i 've never seen that coat
seven jaguars skins i 'm told
harold shot every one
shall we go
what then
we could have had some kind of birthday party for him
we could have taken paul to the fight with us
did you see him
yeah
is he all right
far as i know
is he coming home
he ditched me
he started running and i started running then he lost me in the park
the park
it 's dark in there
penelope and that 's where he is
i figure he ducked in one place and ducked out another
you figure
then i saw this bakery store that was still open so i bought a birthday cake
a what
for harold
when paul comes home we can have some birthday cake
how nice
they had this cake somebody else had n't picked up
it says happy birthday somebody else
did you talk to paul
before he started to run
he said his father carried a key to this apartment around his neck -- and someday we 'd all hear the sound of that key in the door
we 've got to find him
i want you to show me exactly where you saw him last
and you stay here norbert in case he comes home
that 's all he said -- the thing about the key
he said one other thing
it was n't very nice
what was it
he told me to take a flying fuck at the moon
what 's the matter now
we got a birthday cake kid
did you see the cake
possibly
how long has this been going on
a week
we were waiting for the right time to--
i feel as though i had been made a perfect chump of
i 'm sorry
marry me instead
thank you herb
you 're a wonderful man
you really are
everybody respects you for what you 've done for scouting and the little league
you 're saying no
i 'm saying no -- and thank you
i did n't make my move fast enough
that 's it is n't it
i was too respectful
you were wonderful
what 's so wonderful if i lost the sale
you poor kid
it 's true
well -- it was nice while it lasted
thanks for the memories
you and harold are friends
he 's the most wonderful guy i ever met penelope
he 's the most complicated guy i ever met
i ca n't believe it but he 's going to take me to africa with him
the animals made her sneeze and cry too much
i 'm glad somebody finally cried
every time i come in here and see all this unnecessary death i want to cry
i do n't cry of course
not manly you know
did she try antihistamines
they made her so sleepy she could n't work
throw out all this junk
burn it
this room crawls with tropical disease
war is not healthy for children and other living things
how lovely
no doubt paul thinks it stinks
oh no
wear a coat of cotton -- wear a coat of wool
what
wear a coat of domestic mink
for the love of god though penelope do n't lightheartedly advertise that the last of the jaguars died for you
i never knew when to hold it -- or who to ask or what to say
tonight 's the night
this is very good for us
it is
the wilder paul is tonight the calmer he 'll be tomorrow
as long as he keeps out of the park
after this explosion i think he 'll be able to accept the fact that his mother is going to marry again
the only thing i ever told him about life was keep out of the park after the sun goes down
we 've got to dump shuttle
he brings his vacuum cleaner on dates
that 's the xke
the what
it 's an experimental model
he does n't dare leave it in his car for fear it will fall into the hands of competition
what kind of a life is that
he told me one time what the proudest moment of his life was
he made eagle scout when he was twenty nine years old
oh norbert -- promise me that paul has not gone into the park
if you warned him against it as much as you say it 's almost a certainty
no
oh no
three people murdered in there in the last six weeks
the police wo n't even go in there any more
i wish paul luck
it 's suicide
i 'd be dead by now if that were the case
meaning
every night penelope for the past two years i 've made it a point to walk through the park at midnight
why would you do that
to show myself how brave i am
the issue 's in doubt you know -- since i 'm always for peace--
i 'm amazed
me too
i know something not even the police know -- what 's in the park at midnight
nothing
or when i 'm in there there 's me in there
fear and nobody and me
and maybe paul
what about the murderers
they 're in there
they did n't murder me
paul 's only twelve years old
he can make the sound of human footsteps -- which is a terrifying sound
we 've got to rescue him
if he is in the park luck is all that can save him now and there 's plenty of that
he 's not your son
no
but he 's going to be
if he is in the park and he comes out safely on the other side i can say to him you and i are the only men with balls enough to walk through the park at midnight
on that we can build
it 's a jungle out there
that 's been said before
he 'd go to a movie
i think that 's what he 'd do
if i were sure he was in a movie i could stop worrying
we could have him paged
you know each other
we met here earlier this evening
how neat
how keen
thank you
thank you very much
i believe in miracles now
i 'm taking her to the airport a few minutes from now
she 's going to east st. louis -- to visit an aunt
tell her to have a nice trip
thanks
everything 's going to be beautiful
you fake
you 're no better than the dumbest general in the pentagon
you 're not going to beat harold
you 're not going to beat anybody
you 're not going to stay here either -- yammering and taunting until you 're most gloriously killed
go home
do it
goodbye
hi kid
would you look what the car dragged in
i 'm glad you brought your vacuum cleaner
is that a fact
that maid just quit
the place is a mess
you can start in the master bedroom
you 've got to fight from time to time
not true
or get eaten alive
that 's not true either -- or need n't be unless we make it true
phooey
which we do
but we can stop doing that
we simply stop doing that -- dropping things on each other eating each other alive
penelope
we 're late
the late mrs. harold ryan
i 'm sick of this argument
i just have one more thing to say if you elect a president you support him no matter what he does
that 's the only way you can have a country
it 's the planet that 's in ghastly trouble now and all our brothers and sisters thereon
none of my relatives are chinese communists
speak for yourself
chinese maniacs and russian maniacs and american maniacs and french maniacs and british maniacs have turned this lovely moist nourishing blue green ball into a doomsday device
let a radar set and a computer mistake a hawk or a meteor for a missile and that 's the end of mankind
you can believe that if you want
i talk to guys like you and i want to commit suicide
you get that weight lifting set i sent you
start with the smallest weights
every week add a pound or two
maybe god has let everybody who ever lived be reborn -- so he or she can see how it ends
even pithecanthropus erectus and australopithecus and sinanthropus pekensis and the neanderthalers are back on earth -- to see how it ends
they 're all on times square -- making change for peepshows
or recruiting marines
you ever hear the story about the boy who carried a calf around the barn every day
he died of a massive rupture
you think you 're so funny
you 're not even funny
right
right
you do n't hurt yourself if you start out slow
you 're preparing him for a career in the slaughterhouses of dubuque
take care of your body yes
but do n't become a bender of horseshoes and railroad spikes
do n't become obsessed by your musculature
any one of these poor dead animals here was a thousand times the athlete you can ever hope to be
their magic was in their muscles
your magic is in your brains
kid -- kid--
it 's good
let him go
if he 'd just come out for the little league the way i asked him he 'd find out we touch all the time -- shove each other slug each other and just horse around
i 'm going to go get him--
do n't
let him have all the privacy he wants
let him grieve let him rage
there has never been a funeral for his father
happy birthday wanda june
we can take off the wanda june with a butter knife
we have this new club up here in heaven
yes we do
we only have two members so far but it 's growing all the time
we have enough for a shuffleboard team
in heaven shuffleboard is everything
hitler plays shuffleboard
albert einstein plays shuffleboard
mozart plays shuffleboard
lewis carroll who wrote alice in wonderland plays shuffleboard
jack the ripper plays shuffleboard
walt disney who gave us snow white and the seven dwarfs plays shuffleboard
jesus christ plays shuffleboard
it was almost worth the trip -- to find out that jesus christ in heaven was just another guy playing shuffleboard
i like his sense of humor though -- you know
he 's got a blue and gold warm up jacket he wears
you know what it says on the back
pontius pilate athletic club
most people do n't get it
most people think there really is a pontius pilate athletic club
we 're going to have jackets are n't we
you bet
the harold ryan fan club
pink eh
with a yellow streak up the back
we got very good tailor shops up here
they 'll make you any kind of uniform any kind of sweatsuit you want
judas iscariot -- he 's got this black jacket with a skull and crossbones over the heart
he walks around all hunched over and he never looks anybody in the eye and written on the back of his jacket are the words go take a flying--
hello
my name is beatrice
have you been here before
no
what we offer here is nude body to body contact on a bed in a private room
it 's twenty dollars a half hour thirty dollars an hour
anything else you desire may be discussed in the privacy of your room
tips are allowed
we accept bank americard master charge and american express
i do n't really want
body to body contact
that you may discuss with the girl of your choice in the privacy of your room
no
i do n't think so
you sure
we have regular sessions too
only twenty dollars
you 're not exactly the type we 're looking for
you mean i 'm black
no just not the type
what do you mean not the type
do n't you know who i am
i 'm big dick brown
i 've been in more porno movies than you ever saw
i 've worked with harry reems
i 've worked with johnny wad
not the type
i can come ten times a day
i can keep it hard two hours at a time
my cock is nine inches long
i 'm sorry mr. brown
i 'm sure you 're very good but at the moment i 've got nothing for you
if something comes up we 'll give you a call
shit
you just do n't want to hire a nigger that 's all
i knew this was a scam
i shouldn'ta come
the boy your daughter was talking to did n't work at the park
we 've interviewed everybody there
but is she has
there 's no evidence of any foul play at present
i hope she 's just a runaway
there 's something wrong here
kristen is not the type of girl to just up and leave
i said i hope she 's a runaway
better that than she just disappears like so many others do
sometimes they turn up years later sometimes not
a lot of crimes go unreported unknown
these are realities
what are you doing
two officers have been assigned to the case
i ca n't keep them on indefinitely but we 'll go through every lead
apparently your friend has gone into mexico
a border guard responded to the apb
how does it feel to have the l.a.p.d. doing your work for you
you 're going to thank me for this
you know what the media 's like
they love this kinda shit
if that guy goes off half cocked and gets himself hurt you 're going to have so much bad publicity you
i heard you the first time
we had nothing to go on with this kid
just a runaway
do you really think he 's in danger
if he has anything to say about it yeah
i 've been asking a lot of questions and i do n't like the answers i 'm getting
he 's made a lot of people nervous including some poor faggot who thought he was going to be a movie star
we are n't gon na arrest him for that
big threat
tv would ream you
keep me informed of what he 's up to
you help me i 'll help you
no
we offer female wrestling that is nude body to body contact with a girl of your choice in a private room
twenty dollars a half hour thirty dollars hour
any other arrangements may be discussed in the privacy of your room
tipping is permitted
we accept bank americard master charge and american express
yeah
do you want to take a session
i just want to ask some questions
you may do that in the privacy of your room
okay
i 'll take a half hour
do you have any particular choice of girl
you 'll be fine
well actually i wanted to ask about this girl
i have her picture here
pull out your cock
what
cops are n't allowed to do that either
a judge ruled that that was entrapment
do n't ask me why
i guess he figured the sight of a vice officer 's dong would make a girl unable to stop herself
no felice i 'm not a cop
in fact right now i 've got as little respect for the police as you do
i 'm looking for a girl
a runaway
i need someone to help me
are you going to stiff me
what do you mean
look that twenty dollars you just paid i do n't get any of that
that goes to the guys that own this place
i get two bucks an hour minus ten percent for a bail fund
i make all my money on tips
you want a tip
sure
what do you want
tips can be anywhere from thirty dollars to seventy dollars
what do you mean
what do you want to tip me for
look you got to spell it out
whatever you want just say it
i 'll give you a tip
here 's forty dollars
now what do you want
i said i just wanted to talk to you
that 's cool
... about this woman
i 'm trying to find her
do you know her
look i do n't know anybody
i never seen her before
i 'm getting angry
wait a minute that 's going to cost you more than forty bucks
i 'm getting angry
i want some answers
where 's the guy who runs this place
who is it
that blond guy
where is he
i 'm going to talk to someone
wait
where is he
where 's the bastard that runs this shit hole
i 'd like to place a personals ad in the free press
how many weeks
just one
the rate is a dollar per line a dollar and a half bold face
film producer -- that should be in caps bold face
okay
film producer seeks young men 18 to 25 for hardcore film
prior film experience a must
call jake at players motel
777 vine
463 5671
hello
you want some information
yeah
we offer
yeah yeah
... the disciplines bondage domination and humiliation
i 'm looking for tod
is he in
i do n't know no tod
what girls you got here
my name is hope
this is faith
charity 's in back
that 's all you got three girls
man how many girls do you need
i was told there was a real nice girl here named joanne
quite young
that 's charity
she 's out back
she 'll be free in half hour
no that would be much too overpowering
yeah overpowering
that was the word i was looking for
mr. van dorn i 've worked on the color scheme for weeks
i think it 's just right
what 's that shade of blue called
pavonine
it 's the same tint as the stripe in the fabric
are you still going with that fella that teaches at grand valley
sam
yeah
he 's a nice guy
do n't lose him
maybe we could tone down this stripe a bit
it 's a little
overpowering
yeah
okay mr. van dorn i think we could knock that pavonine blue a bit
are you sure it 's all right
yes
i think it 'll look better
if you say so
kristen went on that convention today did n't she
yeah
how did you know
are you the star of this picture
you kidding
three days work
i finish tonight
the other girl is the star
she thinks so
what do you do
i work with ramada
we 're doing some pictures together
well next time you talk to him tell him to pay his actresses more
are you niki
sure
like in mikey and niki
did you see that picture
no
too bad
i was n't in it
it 's your money
you talk
i 'm making a film
jim sullivan 's going to be in it
he said you might know where tod is
do i know you
were n't you on the set the other night
with ramada
yeah
you making a feature
um hm
live sound
got any parts
i 'm free
not free- free but you know free
i do n't really do this
joanne
you know her
no
i saw her with tod
do you know where she lives
nah
do you know where she would be
where is she
tod might know
where 's he
last i heard he went to san diego
if we went there would you be able to find him
you 're not a film producer are you
how much do you make a week niki
no
huh
niki
calm down
relax
let 's just talk for a while
then later you 'll go back to your room and we 'll get some sleep
you have anything to drink
you want to go out and get something
i do n't drink but you can go out
you do n't drink
ulcers
you 're not a private detective either are you
no
i did n't think so
i 've fucked detectives
who are you
a friend
of joanne 's
yeah
i 'm her father
jesus
her name is kristen
she disappeared a couple of months ago
and your wife
where 's she
she 's dead
hey do n't worry about it
your daughter 's around
we 'll find her in a couple days
you really should n't eat like that
all that sugar
it 's not good for you
at least i 'm a growing person
you wo n't keep growing at this rate
what rate
you know what i 'm talking about
you never met a working girl before have you
you think i like sucking off guys all night
maybe i do
so what
you ca n't even say it can you
say what
sucking off
okay
sucking off
now does that make me as good as you
you do n't understand shit
okay tell me
why do you live like you do
did you ever live in a room with six people and you did n't have any money any food any furniture
have your brother come out his car break down he ca n't get a job
your friends stealing food going through trash behind a supermarket
is that the way it was with you
no
but does it make any difference
how did you get to be the way you are
do n't knock it
a girl can save up a lot money doing this -- big money
then you 're free
you can go off to europe meet somebody get married
my girlfriend 's going to buy her own beauty parlor
not me
i 'm gon na travel
keep movin that 's my motto
would you rather work at copper penny at a dollar eighty an hour having every two bit cocksucker able to yell at you
i can make more money suc
doing what i do for five minutes than i can all week at another job
you used to work at copper penny
no
you and i niki have very different ideas about sex
why
are you a sex fiend
no
neither am i.
but it 's all you do
how important do you think sex is
not very
we 're just alike
you think sex is so unimportant you do n't do it
i think sex is so unimportant i do n't care who i do it with
i do n't see why i must justify myself to you
i do n't care about the things you do
i do n't care what 's happening in new york or los angeles
i do n't care about movies or tv
i do n't care who 's on johnny carson
what do you care about
i care about my daughter
what 's t j
tijuana
they were here
tod was
he was with ratan
what does that mean
what does he do
he deals in pain
is kristen safe
you have to believe in something
what do they believe in -- the whatjamacillit church
christian reformed
it 's a dutch calvinist denomination
do they believe in reincarnation
i believe in reincarnation
they believe in the tulip
what the crap
it 's an anagram
it comes from the canons of dort
every letter stands for a different belief
t u l i p. like -- are you sure you 're interested in this
yeah yeah go on
t stands for total depravity that is all men through original sin are totally evil and incapable of good
all my works are like filthy rags in the sight of the lord
shit
tod'll meet you at the bookstore at eddy and o'farrell tomorrow noon
i told him you were a specialty customer
why ca n't i meet him now
rot in hell honey
he 's busy now
where does he live
just a second
it 's my ass i 'm risking
you better do it my way
these fuckers do n't mess around
i must have been in more motel rooms this week than in the rest of my life
at least it feels that way
i know what you mean
after a while they all look the same
they are the same
do you live in a house back in wherever
grand rapids
of course
on your own land
look i really do n't know your daughter but
but what
i would n't expect too much
i mean about her coming back
once a girl gets into the life
what makes you so sure
you wife is n't dead is she
why do you say that
just a guess
she ai n't dead though is she
she left you right
yeah
she was the one called joanne
how 'd you find that out
just a guess
did you have it good with your wife
you know sex
i do n't blame you niki
really i do n't
it 's this culture where everything 's based on sex sold on sex
magazines music tv
it 's destroying everything
buy this 'cause of sex use this 'cause of sex
kids think it 's normal
they think they 're supposed to talk dirty wear scanty clothes
do n't get upset
i lied too
i do n't make no five hundred dollars a week
everything i make goes to granville
granville
my man
pimp
i split 'cause he do n't treat me for shit
thinks he 's so cool 'cause he 's black
i once tried to take my clothes but he says you ca n't take 'em 'cause they 're my clothes -- i bought em
yeah with my fucking money
look niki this really is n't my business
i do n't know anything about
so i guess we 're both fucked huh
but at least you get to go to heaven
i do n't get shit
those cops like all cops are intelligent enough but they are masters of de ductive reason
that is you ask them what three and two are they 'll tell you five but if you ask them what five is they go blank
that 's spec u lative reasoning and that 's where i come in
well what do they know
dogshit
worse yet they do n't care
so then mr. mast
andy
... what do you have to offer
let me ask you a personal question a painful one
the first of many
tell me was your daughter the kind of girl to run around to ah play practical jokes maybe
no i did n't think she was
let me get the picture here
let me guess
she was an absolutely clean girl a model daughter she never had rebellious or impure thoughts she did n't fuck around
if i was you mr. mast i 'd watch my language
hey i 'm a private detective van dorn you want to hire a choir boy you can go back to grand rapids
i 've been to that scumbag town
it 's full of them
who 's paying you
you are
that 's right
as i was saying i 'll pick up the thread
there 's a number of ways i can go
there 's not much you can do here
stay if you want
maybe it 'd be better if you went back home
go through kristen 's personal stuff
ask around maybe she knew somebody out here
look i do this a lot
i work at a minimum rate of 750.00 a week
it may seem like a lot of money to you but it ai n't
you could hire cheaper
and better
i suppose
but i 'll tell you jake i 'm like a little animal
when i get my teeth into something i never let go
if your daughter 's here i 'll track her down
hello
mr. van dorn
mast
yeah
where are you
the connection sounds very good
i 'm back in grand rapids
in g.r.
why
can you meet me in about an hour
at the pantlind hotel
i 've got a meeting
what are you paying me for
i 'll be there
this used to be a real city
i was here about fifteen years ago
embezzlement case
it was always a little religious for my taste but at least it was a city
with a downtown and all
what have you found out
i 've got some news
your daughter 's all right
at least i think she is
where is she
i do n't know
what do you mean
have you ever seen any ah pornographic movies jake
no
do you know what a hardcore movie is
that 's like a stag film
yeah
you ever seen any of those
no
they 're legal now
they are
yeah
all over
even here in grand rapids
hmm
there 's a little stall theatre up here
it 's closed now but i 'm borrowing it for an hour
i think there 's something you 'd better see
where is she
i do n't know
where did you get that film
i bought it at a store in l.a.
who made it
i do n't know
what do you mean
wait
slow down
a film like this 16 mm cost two three hundred dollars sold outright shown in peep machines maybe theatres maybe not is almost impossible to track
nobody makes it nobody shows it nobody sees it
it 's like it does n't even exist
what 's it called
it was called slave of love when i bought it
next time it 's sold it 'll be called something else
but the police
the police
they know less than you do
do you think she 's safe
yeah
probably
you like this do n't you
showing me
this
i hate it
but you got ta know buddy
a lot of strange things happen in this world
things you do n't know about in grand rapids
things you do n't want to know about
doors that should never be opened
i 've known more about this sort of thing than a man should
do n't ask me why
i ai n't cheated you pilgrim
this is research damn it
that girl could have told us something
research my ass
i suppose these are the extra expenses i 've been paying for
and in the middle of the morning too
what are you doing here
i felt like such a shit pilgrim after what i did to you -- not that i did anything wrong -- that i kept investigating poking around
there 's some poor s.o.b
in l.a. with his face all bent out of shape who you 've damaged his movie career
lucky for him people do n't look at his face
do the police want to arrest me
nah
they do n't care about some faggot hustler
they 're more interested in your daughter 's health -- and yours
like i am
yeah sure
listen pilgrim you 're way out on a limb here
you do n't know what you 're into
you sure as hell have n't been any help
i 'm sorry about that
have you found anything out
you 've got to tell me
why do n't you tell me something for a change
like what
who is ratan
where 'd you hear that name
i just heard
who is he
you know it 's possible to buy anything on this earth
you can buy child whores slaves
you can have people raped killed
one of the men who supposedly arranges such things is named ratan
he usually is n't in this country
how 'd you hear about him
it 's just a name
do n't do anything more
i 'll find out what i can
does she know anything about this
who
the whore
no
she 's just a victim
a dime a dozen
what happened pilgrim
just leave me alone
but i 'm here to help you
andy can you do something for her
maybe money
go home pilgrim
there 's nothing you can do
forget this place
start over
you want to go for coffee after we send the girls off
no
thanks anyway
i 've got to get over to the office
anne wants to make sure you come over for dinner sunday
with kristen gone you 'll be all alone
what is it jake
wes anne come here a moment
what happened
they do n't know
they were having some recreation deal out at knott 's berry farm and kristen was n't there when they got back to the bus and they could n't find her
jake
how did you find me
i called every l.a. hotel
the holiday inn gave this as a referral number
your office said you had no business in new york so i figured you had come out here
what 's happening jake
what are you doing
nobody 's heard from you
anne 's worried sick
we did n't know if you were dead or alive
wes do me a favor
what
leave me alone
go home
go away
just do what i say
do n't ask
what is going on
i think i 've found a way to find kristen
i have a plan
but i have to be alone
what plan
you do n't want to know
now wes leave please
for me
what will i tell the others
they care about you
tell them anything you want
tell them i 'm on a vacation a business trip
tell them i needed a rest
tell them anything just do n't tell them
hey man
we 're casting for an explicit sex action feature
i know
word 's out on the street -- word 's also out you ai n't really hiring anyone
that 's not true mr
jim sullivan
sometimes they call me jism jim
that 's not true jim
in fact i think you 're very close to the type we 're looking for
oh yeah
i 've done a lot of good stuff
shorts features
no major roles it 's true
but good stuff
that 's what i wanted to talk to you about
oh yeah
i remember that
it was made by some college kids
it was called slave of love
god i do n't know what it was called
i never saw it
i only got twenty- five bucks for the whole goddamned thing
i thought you were quite good in it
i also like the girl in it
really thought she was good
i wondered if she was still around
if she was still working
hey stop stop
i 'll do anything you want
it 's okay
i can dig it
you can do anything you want to me
where is she
where is the girl
she 's got a man
a white guy
tod something or other
where does he hang out
i do n't know
where
look i know this chick niki
she works at les girls
she would know
honest
i hear you got money to spend
i hear you 're interested in
interesting things
yeah
do you work for the san francisco police department or do you have any other affiliation with any law enforcement agency
no
what you got in mind
i want to meet ratan
what is that
a kind of chair
i never heard of no ratan
i was told that there were certain things that only ratan could provide
you 're talking about real excitement
yeah
i heard you and ratan just came from mexico
and that you had a film of a girl being ah you know
who told you about this
rucker
i do n't know no ratan but i may be able to help you out
it 's not me of course
just helping out a friend
it 'll cost you five hundred bucks for a single screening
is this with a girl named kristen
um hm
you got the five hundred
well
take it or leave it
okay
meet me here today at seven o'clock
with the money
then we 'll go see the film
good
where 's ratan
who
that film was a fake
everything 's phony
ratan
who the fuck knows
the four aces
he goes there
let 's go
fifty cents admission
what
it 's fifty cents admission
it 's applicable to a purchase
do you have a ah film called slave of love
what we got is just these here
what you see
it 's a short film
they 're all about the same
you want something
this is from the movie i was talking about
i do n't know what you 're talking about
i wondered if you had ever seen this film or this woman
right here
that girl
no never saw her
i do n't know anybody
i 'm just trying to find
who owns this store
i do n't know
look man if you 're looking for somebody maybe you ought to see the cops
but i
i do n't know nothing man
you do n't want anything for your fifty cents
no
here
take your fifty cents back
that 's all right
no take it
i do n't want your goddamn fifty cents
i got a picture here
i want you to tell me where to find this woman
i been asking everybody
nobody knows anything
calm down mister
you do n't want to get the cops in here do you
you got a family
i do n't suppose you 've ever seen this girl before either
her name 's kristen but i suppose you 've never seen her
why do n't you just go outdoors mister
cool off
cool off huh
how 's this for cooling off
hold it mister
what do you think of that
or this
you going to knott 's berry farm with him
he asked me
you going with anybody
i do n't know
you ever play chicken
what 's that
you never heard of that
com'on tell me
well a boy goes like this see
what does that do
well each time he comes in closer like this
ssh
i 'm on a stakeout
oh
i 'm staking out this beer bottle
trying to find out if i 'll finish it or it 'll finish me
i 'm worried about jake
i 'm off that case
he fired me
he did n't look good at all
something strange is going on
he 's got himself into some trouble
he would n't say what
i 'll tell you that was an interesting case
the van dorn girl
i 've handled runaway cases like it before
usually when you put the pressure on the porn underworld for an underage kid she pops up in about a week
everybody denies ever seeing her but there she is at the airport with a prepaid ticket home
well i put pressure on all over town for this girl and it stayed cold as ice
in fact certain people for this girl and -- nothing
i guess i gave your brother in law sort of a raw deal
i want to rehire you
to find out what 's happening to my brother in- law
i 've been on another case
all day
i suppose i can move it over
seven fifty a week plus travel expenses
do you really think kristen is just a runaway
maybe
maybe not
i also want you to protect my brother- in law
huh
you have to understand
he can be mean self righteous
he had a vishund once
loved that dog
he came home one day and the dog bit him
he took that dog and staked him out in the back yard
it was winter
every day he came home and watched that dog until he froze
he 's capable of doing anything
to his own daughter
to anybody
jake'll take care of me
who
van dorn
you must be kidding yourself honey
you think once that guy finds his daughter he 'll care about you
hey piss head what brings you around
you do n't have to get uppity with me bill
i remember when you was running that car wash and could n't make it go
and what was that other thing you tried
a dairy queen
went busted too
at least i improved myself
what 's up
i want you to take a look at this girl here
she 's been in some porn stuff
no andy
do n't know the kid
look again billy boy
this is jail bait
could get you in a lotta trouble
nope never saw her before
kurt come over here
do n't use underage kids
would n't touch 'em for all the cow shit in mexico
you recognize this piece of wool kurt
you remember me
louise
rhymes with squeeze
you working in san diego now
i 'm still in l.a. but i 'm looking for tod
i heard he was around
was
he and that shitheel ratan went down to t j. maybe i should n't say that
anyway i hear he 's back in frisco now
was he with a girl
no
thanks
hello i 'm candy gulf
how do you do
i 'm mrs. chasen
come in
you are at the university candy
yes i am
and what are you studying
poli
sci
with a home ec minor
eh poli sci
political science
it 's all about what 's going on
he seems very nice
is harold interested in eh what 's going on
i think it 's such a super thing to study
and then of course i can always fall back on home ec
yes that 's good planning
tell me are you a regular candy in this computer club
i think i should mention candy that harold does have his eccentric moments
oh u yes</u
well that 's all right
i 've got a brother who 's a real cut up too
i 'll never forget the time we had this old tv set with no parts in it
well tommy stuck his head behind it and started giving a newscast before the whole family
we were all hysterical
and here 's little tommy pretending to be walter cronkite
have n't we met before
none of that lady
oh well
must have been your brother
out
but there is a family resemblance
you too buster
stand over here
lady you 're in a heap of trouble
i have you down here for several violations speeding resisting arrest driving without a license driving a stolen vehicle possession of a stolen tree
where 's the tree
we planted it
is this your shovel
no
possession of a stolen shovel
officer i can explain
lady resisting arrest is a serious criminal offense
under the state criminal code section 545 paragraph 10-b
oh do n't get officious
you 're not yourself when you 're officious
that 's the curse of a government job
lady is it true you 're driving without a license
check
and that truck is it registered in your name
oh no
not in u my</u name
then whose name is it registered in
well i do n't know
do you know harold
where are the papers
i suppose they are in the truck
are you going to take a lot of time with this
wait here
because if you are
lady
be quiet
this way edith
harold is out by the garage
he has a new car and he has been tuning it up
he 's very mechanical
what kind of a car is it
oh
it looks like a hearse
very nice
compact
edith i 'd like you to meet my son harold
harold this is edith
eh
fern
i 'm very pleased to make your acquaintance
and what do you do my dear
i 'm a file clerk harrison feed and grain
how interesting
not very
oh
well what is it exactly that you do
i 'm in charge of all the invoices for the southwest
we supply for example most of the egg farmers in southern california
so you can imagine
edith was just telling me about her job
i 'm a file clerk
yes
henderson feed and grain
harrison
harrison feed and grain
at hamilton and fourth
i 'm in charge of the invoices
and i type up the schedule for the trucking fleet
she supplies the whole southwest with chicken feed
well not all the southwest
although we do have a large business
barley was very big last week
fifteen hundred
what do you want
i 'm sorry
i was looking for maude
sorry i 'm late
a rather free translation but nonetheless correct
greetings to you too my little one
tell me what do you see
a block of ice
exactly
now ask me what i see
what do you see
i see the eternal goddess of beauty and love
i see aphrodite
the consummate woman
it 's a question of emphasis you might say
accentuate the positive so to speak
eh could i have my pen back now please
oh of course
what is your name
harold chasen
how do you do
i am dame marjorie chardin but you may call me maude
nice to meet you
oh thank you
i think we shall be great friends do n't you
can i drop you anywhere harold
no thank you
i have my car
well then i must be off
we shall have to meet again
do you dance
what
do you sing and dance
eh no
no
i thought not
yes
oh so do i. they 're such fun are n't they
it 's all change
all revolving
burials and births
the end to the beginning and the beginning to the end the great circle of life
my this old thing handles well
ever drive a hearse harold
yes
well it 's a new experience for me
good on curves
shall i take you home harold
but this is my car
your hearse
yearse
oh
of course i 've had to make some additions for the new models but not as many as you might think
once you have your basic set it 's then only a question of variation
and you get into any car you want and just drive off
not u any</u car
i like to keep a variety
i 'm always looking for the new experience like this one
i liked it
thank you
but when you take these cars do n't you think you are wronging the owners
what owners harold
we do n't u own</u anything
it 's a transitory world
we come on the earth with nothing and we go out with nothing so is n't ownership a little absurd
still i think you 'd upset people and i 'm not sure that 's right
well if some people are upset because they feel they have a hold on some things then i 'm merely acting as a gentle reminder i 'm sort of breaking it easy -- here today gone tomorrow so do n't get attached to u things</u>. now with that in mind i 'm not against collecting stuff
it 's all memorabilia but incidental and not integral if you know what i mean
it 's very interesting
oh look
the birds
she 's very sweet but so old- fashioned
please sit down harold
i 'll put on the kettle and we 'll have a nice hot cup of tea
thank you but i really have to go
but it 's oat straw tea
you 've never had oat straw tea have you
no
well then
thank you but it 's an appointment
i really should n't miss it
oh at the dentist 's
sort of
well then you must come back and visit
all right
my door is always open
all right
promise
do you often model for glaucus
heavens no
i do n't have the time
but i like to keep in practice and poor glaucus occasionally needs his memory refreshed as to the contours of the female form
do you disapprove
me
no
of course not
really
do you think it 's wrong
no
oh i 'm so happy you said that because i wanted to show you my paintings
this is the rape of rome and of course there in the corner is quite a graphic depiction of leda and the swan
a self portrait
but over here is my favorite
it 's titled rainbow with egg underneath and an elephant
do you like it
yes
very much
it was my last
i then became infatuated with these -- my odorifics
now i 'll pump it up
and you just turn the handles
okay
what do you smell
subways
perfume
cigarette
cologne
carpet
chestnuts
u snow!</u
it goes on and on
that 's really great
what do you think
oh
eh i like it
no you have to touch it
you have to run your hands over it get close to it really reach out and feel
you try it
here we are harold
oat straw tea and ginger pie
certainly a new experience for me
wonderful
try something new each day
after all we 're given life to find it out
it does n't last forever
you look as if you could
me
ha
did i tell you i 'll be eighty on saturday
you do n't look eighty
that 's the influence of the right food the right exercise and the right breathing
greet the dawn with the breath of fire
of course there 's no doubt the body is giving out
i 'm well into autumn
i 'll have to be giving it all up after saturday
sweeten the tea with honey harold
it 's delicious
that 's a nice teapot
sterling silver
it was my dear mother in law 's part of a dinner set of fifty pieces
it 's one of the few things that survived
oh but i do rattle on so
tell me about yourself harold
what do you do when you are n't visiting funerals
well it 's all very thrilling of course but i ask you harold
is it enough
what do you mean
i should like to change into a sunflower most of all
they are so u tall</u and simple
and you harold what flower would you like to be
i do n't know
just one of those
the universal language of mankind
what music do you like harold
well
what happened
look
what
over there by the courthouse
what is it
that little tree
it 's in trouble
come on
look at it harold
it 's suffocating
it 's the smog
people can live with it but it gives trees asthma
they ca n't breathe
see the leaves are all brown
harold we 've got to do something about this life
but what
we 'll transplant it
to the forest
but we ca n't just dig it up
why not
but this is public property
exactly
do n't you think we should get some tools maybe
yes you 're right
we 'll go see glaucus
come on
oh wait maude
look
oh my
we 're too late
is he all right
he 's fallen asleep as usual
we 'll come back in the morning
what is that he 's working on
an ice sculpture
it 's venus the goddess of love the completion of which is his unfulfilled dream
it is kind of rough
he 's never finished one yet
he has around him every kind of hand tool known to man but the poor dear has difficulty staying awake
look the ice is melting
yes
a little after dinner liqueur harold
well i really do n't drink
oh it 's all right
it 's organic
thank you
some nuts
some licorice
it has no nutritional value but then consistency is not really a human trait
thank you
oh that was fun
let 's play something together
but i do n't play anything
do n't play anything
dear me
everyone should be able to make some music
why it 's life
rhythm and harmony that 's the cosmic dance
come with me
okay
superb
i think he 's following us
is he
ah the police
always wanting to play games
well here goes
he 's stopped
the old double u turn
gets them every time
there
oh i like the feel of soil do n't you
and the smell
it 's the earth
the earth is my body
my head is in the stars
who said that
i do n't know
i suppose i did
well farewell little tree
grow up tall and change and fall to replenish the earth
is n't it wonderful harold
all around us
living things
oh those motorcycles are awfully chilly
yeah
and it is cold in here
hello glaucus
i u think</u i see it
yes
it 's almost there
the ice is melting
yes
do n't you think we should turn off the heat
why
there 'll be a new block of ice in the morning
look at that sky
it 's so big
it 's so blue
and beyond the blue is the blackness of the cosmos
spreckled with uncountable stars
the stars are shining right now
we just ca n't see them
just another instance of all that 's going on that is beyond human perception
maude do you pray
pray
no
i communicate
with god
with life
this is really nice
makes me feel like a kid
i want to do somersaults
well why do n't you
no
i 'd feel stupid
harold everyone has the right to make an ass out of themselves
you just ca n't let the world judge you too much
want to join me in some cartwheels
no
i feel more like yodeling
yodeling
it 's sinking harold
going over the horizon where we are all going to go
it 's getting dark
let each man hold on to his candle and get a light where'er he can
where 's that
from the guys who got the matches of course
boy
it sure has been a wonderful day
and you you are beautiful
oh harold
you make me feel like a schoolgirl
shall i drop by tomorrow
oh i have a luncheon date
with this girl
oh
i 've never met her
my mother set it up
well be kind
i 've lived a long time harold seen evil as well as good and it has been my experience that kindness
maude i must speak to you
what is it harold
they 're going to draft me
in the army
i 'm going to be sent away
but they ca n't do that
you have n't even got the vote
but they have
well do n't go
but they 'll put me in jail
really
just put it there harold
they 'd put you in jail eh
well historically you 'd be in very good company
that 's what my husband used to say when we were in the french underground dealing with the gestapo
would you like to do a little raking
work i 'm told done with no selfish interest purifies the mind
you sink your separate self and become one with the universal self
on the other hand senseless labor is a bloody bore and should be scrupulously avoided
maude do you think you can help me
what
with your skill and my experience
i think we can come up with something
just like this
give me that
i 'm going to throw it in the sewer where it belongs
she took my head
that was n't very scary
no
it had nothing on this afternoon
oh you were n't scared
scared
swimming underwater with that oxygen device of yours
i was petrified
come on you loved it
it was a new experience
how about some candy floss
right on
it would n't be a celebration without it
you sure have a way with people
well they 're my species
look at the stars
yes
they 're old friends
do you think there is any life up there
i do n't know
perhaps
science thinks there is n't
that we are all alone in the universe
we u are</u alone you and me and everybody
but we can look at those stars and maybe someone down the beach or across the sea in china is looking at them too
someone we do n't know and most likely will never see that someone is breathing along with us
and the star- gazers of the past from peasant to princes and the star gazers of the future all of us breathing and looking up there
we are alone but look at the stars and never feel lonely
you should have been a poet
oh no
but i should have liked to have been an astronaut
a private astronaut able to just go out and explore
like the men who sailed with magellan i want to see if we really can fall off the edge of the world
what a joke it will be if like them i
end where i began
maude
yes
here
why are there no photographs in these frames
i took them out
why
they mocked me
they were representations of people i dearly loved yet they knew these people were gradually fading from me and that in time all i would have left would be vague feelings but sharp photographs
so i tossed them out
my memory fades i know
but i prefer pictures made by me with feeling and not by kodak with silver nitrate
i 'll never forget you maude
but i would like a photo of you
it looks like you
thanks
harold that picture is almost twenty five years old
you have n't changed a bit
i 'll put it in my wallet
... which i hope will make you very happy
oh i am happy harold
ecstatically happy
i could n't imagine a lovelier farewell
farewell
why yes
it 's my eightieth birthday
but you 're not going anywhere are you
oh yes dear
i took the pills an hour ago
i should be gone by midnight
oh harold
what a fuss this is
so unnecessary
maude please
do n't die
i could n't bear it
please do n't die
but harold we begin to die as soon as we are born
what is so strange about death
it 's no surprise
it 's part of life
it 's change
but why now
i thought eighty was a good round number
i feel giddy
but maude you do n't understand
i love you
do you hear me
i 've never said that to anyone in my life before
you 're the first
maude
please do n't leave me
oh harold do n't upset yourself so
it 's true
i ca n't live without you
and this too shall pass away
never
never
i 'll never forget you
i wanted to marry you
do n't you understand
i love you
i love you
oh
that 's wonderful harold
go and love some more
chardin
dame marjorie
but you may call me maude
please
she has got to see a doctor right away
please do n't you realize
she is dying
well not u dying</u actually
i 'm changing
you know like from winter to spring
of course it is a big step to take
of course harold 's father had a similar sense of the absurd
i remember once in paris he stepped out for cigarettes and the next i hear he 's arrested for floating nude down the seine experimenting in river currents with a pair of yellow rubber water wings
well that cost quite a little bit of enfluence and d'argent to hush up i can tell you
harold dear stop playing with your food
do n't you feel well
i have a sore throat
well i want you to go to bed directly after dinner
you know how susceptible you are to colds
harold has always been a delicate child
even as a baby he seemed to be abnormally prone to illness harold dear eat up your beets
mother
not now harold
you ca n't put me down for monday
mother
harold please
i 'm on the phone
mother
i 'm going to get married
fay i 'll call you back
what did you say
i 'm getting married
to whom
to a girl
here
i suppose you think this is very funny harold
what
a sunflower
this is insane
perhaps it is
how do you do
ca n't complain
would you like a cigarette
no thank you
they stain my fingers
is sunshine your real name
well actually it was the name of my drama teacher louis sunshine
perhaps you 've heard of him
he was such an influence on the development of my instrument
that means my body in theatre talk
well when i came to hollywood i felt the need to express the emerging me in a new form so i took on sunshine
dore is my real name
well dore actually
my what a lovely place you have here
do you play
no
i 'm learning the banjo
do you
oh i studied the guitar
i had to give it up
gave me calluses on my fingers
as an actress i ca n't afford to have a tarnished instrument
oh is this your father
no
my uncle
oh he 's in the army
i do so like the military do n't you
those uniforms make men look so virile
i did what price glory
in summer stock
i played charmaine with a french accent
this one is particularly interesting
it 's a hari kari blade
ohhh
what 's hari kari
an ancient japanese ceremony
like a tea ceremony
no
like this
tell me harold how many of these eh suicides have you performed
an accurate number would be difficult to gauge
and why is that
well some worked out better than others some had to be abandoned in the planning stages do you include the first time
then there 's the question of maiming
just give me a rough estimate
well a rough estimate
i 'd say fifteen
fifteen
a rough estimate
and were they all done for your mother 's benefit
i would n't say benefit
no i suppose not
how do you feel about your mother
that 's very interesting harold and i think very illuminative
there seems to be a definite pattern emerging
your fondness for useless machines and demolitions seems indicative of your present emotional state your self destructive urges and your alienation from the regular social interaction
what do you think
and of course this pattern once isolated can be coped with
recognize the problem and you are half way on the road to its solution
but tell me what do you do for u fun</u
what activity gives you a different sense of enjoyment than the others
what do you find fulfilling
what gives you that certain satisfaction
i go to funerals
harold
huh
you do n't seem to be listening
i asked do you have any friends
no
none at all
well maybe one
would you care to talk about this friend
no
is this a friend you had when you were away at school
no
i see
were you happy at school harold
yes
you liked your teachers
yes
your classmates
yes
your studies
yes
then why did you leave
i burnt down the chemistry building
we are not relating today harold
i sense a definite resistance
a lack of true and helpful communication
i find you a very interesting case harold but this reluctance of yours is detrimental to the psycho analytical process and can only hinder the possibility of effective treatment
do you understand
yes
very well
now your mother tells me she is arranging several dates for you with some young ladies
how do you feel about that
i see
tell me harold do you remember your father at all
no
i 'd have liked to
why
i 'd have liked to talk to him
what would you say
i 'd show him my hearse
and my room and stuff
what kind of stuff
good idea of yours to come out here harold
it 's a lovely spot
thank you uncle
call me sir harold
first thing you learn in the army an officer deserves your respect
yes sir
perfectly lovely
you know this is what we 're defending
everything that 's good and beautiful in the american way of life
oh there 's some nut peace petitioner over there
let 's go off this way
those crazy commie bastards
i do n't know why we tolerate 'em
parasites
let 's examine the facts on it
i say this country has been too harsh in its outright condemnation of war
i say you can point to many material advantages brought about by a crisis and conflict policy
hell world war ii gave us the ballpoint pen
that 's common knowledge
during wartime the national suicide rate goes down
is that a fact
well that fits in right along with everything i 've been saying
war is not all black
war is not all black
and so i ask you why the hell did we give up on the germans
those damn politicians in washington chalked them up on our side and the wars ever since have been a national disgrace
hell look at history
the two best wars this country has fought were against the jerries
now i say get the krauts on the other side of the fence where they belong and let 's get back to the kind of enemy worth killing and the kind of war this whole country can support
jeez sir
that 's pretty strong stuff
they came at me from all sides hundreds of 'em
we kept firing zat tat tat tat
throw the grenades i shouted
mac throw the grenades
he 's dead joe said and kept right on feeding me bullets
zat tat tat tat
they kept falling but they kept coming
bullets whizzing all around me
zot
joe falls back with a neat red hole in his head
i thought i was done for
but i kept firing
zat tat tat
only one thought kept me going
kill
kill
for mac and joe and the rest of the guys
kill
a blinding flash
i wake up on a stretcher
did we hold
i asked the medic
yes sir he said and i slipped into unconsciousness
jeez
that 's a great story
well you 'll soon have stories like that to tell of your own
you think so sir
sure
be able to tell your children
something for them to look up to
be proud of
i hope so sir
golly i never knew it could be so exciting
it 's the greatest excitement in the world
to pit your own life against another
that 's right
to kill
the taste of blood in your mouth
the moment of truth
another man 's life in your sights
yes
zat
parasite
harold
crazy parasite
commie bastard
get out of here
harold calm down
this is
she 's a commie pig
we 're going to nail every last one
stay where you are harold
she took my head
good afternoon officer
bit of trouble here
yes ma'am
somebody had some trouble parking
well it 's a tricky turn
eh yes ma'm
tell me -- -- is that car parked all right
oh yes
that 's fine
well thank you
eh officer you might turn off the radio
saves the battery
ah
there you are madam
were not you the lady who drove my car off yesterday
was that the one with the st. christopher medal on the dashboard
yes
then i suppose it was me
get in harold
were you also the one who painted the statues
oh yes
how did you like that
well i did n't
oh do n't be too discouraged
for aesthetic appreciation always a little time
but wait
oh kirsty so eager to play so reluctant to admit it
perhaps you 're teasing us
are you teasing us
it 's different for us
we 've always been here
we have no more surprises
oh right
daddy 's died and gone to heaven eh
yes
shit
bull
shit
see
he 's here
you should learn to believe your uncle frank
no
he shouldn't be here
it should've been a trick
fraid not baby
he belongs here
with me
we 're the same
brothers
equal and opposite
pure appetite
pure banality
too much feeling
none at all
he
he loved me
do n't waste your tears
look at him
daddy
daddy
i love you
help me
i 'm your daddy now kirsty
yes
yes
you look
surreal
strange
nightmarish
no
you look
it 's a beautiful dress
i know
she 's done it
she certainly has
it 's coming
it certainly is
i want to go back
sorry friend
no day trips to hell
here you are
here you stay
and forward the only way to go
sad huh
she 's been here six months
her name 's tiffany
what 's the matter with her
almost complete withdrawal
she has n't said a word for nearly two years
god that 's terrible
yeah
doctor malahide 's got her doing these jig saws and things though
says it 's helping to bring her out
i
i had a visitor
what
oh jesus
i ca n't explain
it 's
it 's
i do n't know how to help
i have to save him and i do n't know how to help
kirsty i 'm sorry
do n't understand
i
i know
no one can
but i have to save him
where 's the other doctor
he said he 'd listen
he promised
help
no no one can help
i just want someone to listen or i will go crazy
if anyone can help he can
no bad dreams
so you slept o.k.
well the sofa is n't often used for sleeping on
oh yeah
on your own a lot huh
and you 're sure it was a woman
god i wish i could say no
this is going to do terrible things to my attitude you know
do n't worry about it
your attitude sucks anyway
hey so for it
do n't let pity stop you
i 'm down
nail me
the box
i need the box
the box
like in your story
like in his house
o.k. let 's go
kyle you do n't have
i know i do n't have to
it 's just my time of the month to be a complete fucking idiot
o.k.
i have to go back
or it 'll never stop
what are you talking
i 've got to finish it
finish what
i 'm scared
no
do n't let it
you 've come this far
well
g'bye
it 's been hell
but i did n't open it
i did n't
then why are you here
i 've come for my father
but it 's true he is his own hell
just as you are in yours
and what about you
wait
no more deals kirsty
it 's your flesh we want to experience not your skill at bargaining
no deals
just information
information
free of charge
no strings
just information
go on
but trick us again child and your suffering will be legendary even in hell
what is this
someone else you think escaped us like frank
no no this one did n't escape
you told me you 'd always been in hell
you were wrong
look at it
look
it 's you
nonsense i
it 's you
you haven't always been as you are
you were human
remember
remember all your confusions
think
what was it kid
smack
angel dust
do n't tell me acid 's back in fashion
what are you talking about
who are you
oh excuse me
i thought steve had talked to you
oh pardon me
i obviously did n't convey my hesitation to take his story at face value
no you talk to me
but -- do me a favor
-- none of this demons crap
he talked about demons huh
yeah
what the hell are you asking me for
tag it
move it
the mattress
the mattress
julia
easy easy
whatever happened whatever you saw it 's not here now
i saw it
him
but i got away
and i took the box
and i solved it
and they came
who
the cenobites
i need to touch it to see
see what
the past the future whatever this object holds
is he serious
do n't worry about fingerprints
i never had any
they were over here professor
oooh
who was here
nixon
houdini
you mind sharing your mystic insights
look at them ugly suckers blue
one sheet of glass between them and us
story of my life
i break it they see us happy halloween
no more hiding
outside
i could be outside --
you mean outside
with her
would'ya look at this babies
made 'em myself
holy water silver shavings white oak the works
behind this door
a dark entity -- evil ancient and hungry
hey
stinky
kitchen 's closed
whatcha havin'
six library guards raw
plus belts and boots
man you 're gon na need some heavy fiber to move that out --
red i found something --
nah -- he 's taken care of
no listen this sammael the desolate one lord of the shadows son of nergal --
you were burned by some organic acid
i 'm lucky that way
red
how long was it latched onto you
i dunno maybe five seconds -- ow
touched you five seconds
laid three eggs
did n't even buy me a drink
remind me why i keep doing this
rotten eggs and the safety of mankind
oh right --
that 's all for you sammy
red -- you need to hear the rest of the information --
this is an important mission sgt
whitman
i hope you realize that
oh -- you do n't wanna know what i think
topside now
sgt
whitman
sgt
whitman
may i have a word
what is it
in private if you do n't mind
you are a catholic
amongst other things yes -- but that 's hardly the point
here
you 'll need one of these
i abhor violence
sergeant whitman i hope you do n't think me mad --
three days too late for that one professor
you 're wasting our time there 's nothing on this island but sheep and rocks
ruins
not rocks
the remains of trondham abbey
built on an intersection of ley lines the boundaries between our world and the other --
what a load of crap
hell a week ago i had n't even heard the word parabnormal --
paranormal but -- you read the transmission
half transmission
nonsense -- german ghost stories
i have seen ghosts whitman
oh i 'll bet you have
the freak in the gas mask --
karl ruprecht kroenen one of the reich 's top scientists
head of the thule occult society
if he 's here this is worse than i thought
air and sea backup
what 's closest
cordon off the area
something came through
from where
what the hell was that
an ape
no
it was red
bright red
it 's got a big stone -- in its hand --
i think that is its hand
every time the media get a look at him they come to me
i 'm running out of lies trevor
i thought you liked being on tv
i do
how many escapes
this year alone five
tom -- he 's our guest not a prisoner
your guest happens to be six foot five bright red and is government funded
he 's just going through a phase --
these freaks trevor they give me the creeps
and i 'm not the only one
you 're up for review
you and your petting zoo
i know where to find him
i 'll get him back
a 16th century statue was destroyed
saint dionysius the aeropagite
who wards off demons
smuggled into this country by an overzealous curator
the statue however was hollow --
reliquary --
a prison
the vatican deemed its contents dangerous enough to include it on the list of avignon
of which we hold a copy
son
about rasputin --
do n't worry
i 'll get him soon enough --
listen to me
this time is different
there 's more at stake than ever before
how hard can it be
i punched the crap out of that thing that he sent -- ouch
i worry about you
me
c'mon --
well i wo n't be around forever you know
oh stop that -- damn
be careful there --
do n't look
turn around
is it bad
how many buildings does she have to burn
she belongs here
that 's not how she feels
she may never feel it
how does he know so much about me
abe possesses a unique frontal lobe
unique
that 's a word you 'll hear quite a bit around here
where am i -- exactly sir
as you entered the lobby there was an inscription --
on the desk yes
in latin
impressive
do you remember what it said
in absentia luci tenebrae vinciunt
in the absence of light darkness prevails
for there are things that go bump in the night agent myers
we are the ones who bump back
1958 the occult war finally ends when adolf hitler dies
1945 you mean
hitler died in 45
did he now
i 'm in way over my head i know that much
you 're doing fine
and as a father i worry about him
in medieval stories agent myers there 's often a young knight inexperienced but pure of heart
oh please
i 'm not pure of heart
who 's the squirt
agent myers is your new liaison
got tired of me
nah
i 'll be around red just back in the field
i do n't want him
manning says i 'm too soft on you -- the candy
give him the candy
well you did break out --
i wanted to see her
it 's nobody 's business
it is
you got yourself on tv again
myers huh
you have a first name
try not to stare
he hates when people stare
hey hey hey
they 're playing our song
we 're on the move
c'mon champ
happy halloween
you 're taking me for a walk
they 're not speaking
professor broom had him grounded
grounded
who 's grounded
okay
you saw the fish man right
he gets fed six times a day
he 's got a thing for cats
you 'll be his nanny his keeper his best friend
he never goes out unsupervised --
who
oh jesus
hellboy --
is real --
yup
sixty years old by our count
but he does n't age like we do -- think dog years he 's barely out of his teens
uh oh -- john
staring at what
his horns
he files 'em
to fit in
his what
sir may i go first
not so fast
he barely knows him --
that voice --
i sang the first lullaby you ever heard my child
i ushered you into this world
i alone know your true calling your true name
do n't tell me it 's zeppo
she 's dead
noooo
noooo
names hold the power and nature of things
mine for example
rasputin the crossroads
and crossroads i have become
your true name anung un rama
repeat it
become the key
anung un rama
no it does n't make it right but i stopped that creature did n't i
that 's what you do
that 's why we need you
you have an insight
you know monsters
what are you trying to say
in the end after you 've killed and captured every freak out there -- there 's still one left you
i wish i could be more gracious but --
one falls two shall arise
so you pop one two come out
you kill two you get four
you kill four you 're in trouble
we have to nail 'em all at once
and the eggs
when we do no mumbo jumbo
double- core vulcan-65 grenades
we 've installed a very handy timer
set it walk away
cable pulls the safety pins k boom
easy to clean easy to use
those things never work
never
each of us gets a belt
i wo n't take 'em
they never work
we should go back -- you -- you could tear that door apart --
do n't move
we --
-- should go back
now
no
do n't --
i 'm in charge
we go back
you 'd better stay here
i 'll find a way out
we 'll come back for you
you call that thing a cigar
yup
you never ever light a cigar that way
thank you
my job
you 're kidding --
those comics -- they never got the eyes right
oh
uh
hello
i -- i have these
for you
father 's back
still angry
myers
how 's your arm
my arm is fine
where are you
i just fried stinky
tell father i 'll be home
he should n't wait up
wait -- wait -- you ca n't go anywhere -- i got ta go with you --
no no no it 's fine i do my job i take a break
no
stop
do n't do this -- listen to me -- tell me where you are --
myers
yes
goodbye
what took you so long
c'mon time to go home
tape you up
what are you a boy scout
no
i never was
could 've fooled me
go away
you want me to hold him down
that 's right stud hold me down
down there
did you ever loose track of him
well let 's see -- there was that moment when i had a train on top of my head --
mmmh -- pamcakes
we 're going out --
professor that girl you were talking about --
hey
you think twice --
i think i can help -- talk to her -- i can bring her back
what landed you this job pushing pamcakes
punctuality
what was your area of expertise
what was that
hostage negotiations
where do you --
shh
just a second
anything else you --
not from you
well good n-
good night
are you sure about this
on a scale of one to ten two
but -- -- she 'll take care of you myers
she 's a tough one
keep her safe
no matter what
i 'll deal with whatever 's back there
alone
how big can it be
you better have that looked at
just a scratch
i wanted to see you
we miss you at the bureau
abe 's crazier every day
and father 's still mad at me -- come back liz
come back
i --
no
not this time h.b. it 's been months since i 've had an episode
and you know what
i 'm learning to control it
goodnight then
goodnight
um
liz -- i -- there 's something i 'd like you to -- something i need you to hear
well
is it long
i 'm going out but --
out
out out
for a cup of coffee but go ahead read
you 're going alone
no
myers is taking me
it 's nothing
just a list -- it 's not finished --
oh okay then
maybe later then
okay someone 's expecting us
turn on your locators -- anyone sees anything
marco
... polo
liz -- can i call you liz
it 's a beautiful name --
60 of the women in this world are named liz
it 's still impressive by my standards my name 's john
dr. broom asked me to invite you back to the bureau
no special precautions no security escorts
you and me in a taxi
like regular folks
does n't sounds like him
miss sherman he 's asking you back but it 's entirely your choice
i admire him
he 's a force of nature
he 's just pushy
no
he 's determined
unstoppable --
cocky
strong
a brute
my uncle used to say
we like people for their qualities but love them for their defects
he -- loves you
i know
what about you
do n't know
really
i grew up with him
i 've missed him too but now every time i see him i get confused
hardly a day goes by he 's not in my mind
even now i feel he 's here --
it 's freezing is n't it
coffee 's warming me up
but it 's not true is it
what --
that you feel that way about me
you want to know -- now --
here
red white whatever -- guys are all the same
hit me
what
christ
what 's the problem
my fucking hand
you fucking ass holes
who are you calling a fucking ass- hole
it 's this bastard bed that 's your fucking problem
it 's my lucky day
hi
want to buy a bed
not much
what 's happening
we 're leaving
where 's my father
will you sign for the bed
sure
eh chas slow it down like the man says
it 'll go in
alright let 's give it another try
do you really need this bed lady
that your daughter
uh huh
got her mother 's looks
her mother 's dead
this is n't for real
you solved the box
we came
now you must come with us
taste our pleasures
he does n't see us or hear us
we belong to you kirsty
and you to us
no
let me alone will you
no tears please
it 's a waste of good suffering
no time for argument
you did this before right
many times
to a man called frank cotton
nobody escapes us
he did
i 've seen him
suppose he had slipped us
what significance has that
i could lead you right to him
you could take him back to hell instead of me
we want the man who did this --
no
that was n't the deal
just in time
stay the fuck away from me
please listen to me --
first things first
you can have a telephone when we 've talked
do you know who did this to you
you were holding onto it like grim death
i do n't remember
well the police are going to want to speak to you
you know that
oh christ
we 'll get you a phone as long as you promise to stay put
julia
kirsty
kirsty
it 's frank
it 's uncle frank
no
you remember
no
come to daddy
do n't touch me
or so help me --
what
what will you do
what can you do
there 's nothing to be frightened of
i bet you make your daddy proud do n't you
beautiful
this is n't happening
i used to tell myself that
used to try and pretend i was dreaming all the pain
but why kid yourself
some things have to be endured
take it from me
and that makes the pleasures so much sweeter
no
one last time
give me the box
you want it
come to daddy
this is n't happening
some things have to be endured
you 're julia right
that 's right
who are you
i 'm brother frank
oh
i came for the wedding
there is going to be a wedding
oh
oh yes
well can i come in or not
i 'm sorry
of course
you 're very welcome
well
i do n't want to see the dress
but you said --
i do n't want to see the dress
what about larry --
forget him
wedded bliss
i 'm very happy
sure you are
julia
oh my god
do n't look at me
who are you
i said do n't look
help me
tell me who you are
frank
no
god no
believe me
it 's me
it 's really me
what happened to you
his blood
on the floor
it brought me back
back from where
just help will you
please god help me --
i 'm hurting
hurting
my nerves
are beginning to work again
good
one more
maybe two --
-- to heal me completely
then we can be away from here before they come looking
who
the cenobites
it 's only a matter of time before they find i 've slipped them
i have to get away from here
poor larry
obedient as ever
keep your voice down
ssh
do n't want babe to hear
you 're hurting
you wo n't cheat me will you
you 'll stay with me
help me
then we can be together the way we were before
we belong to each other now for better or worse
well
better
very much better
i 'd like something to wear
and some cigarettes
will you bring me some
later
what
i want an explanation first
i want to know what happened to you
not know
tell me damn you
a long time
you promised me an explanation
this is what began it
a box
it 's not any box
it 's called the lament configuration
it 's a puzzle
let me see
do n't touch it
it 's dangerous
it opens doors
what kind of doors
to experience beyond anything ever known
at least that 's what i was promised when i bought it
pleasure from heaven or hell
i did n't much care which
hell
i was bored
i 'd done everything
i 'd gone to the limits
there was nothing left to experience
at least nothing i could buy on earth
and you came back here to solve the puzzle --
sure
somewhere safe
safe
christ
they tortured me here
in this room
who did
the cenobites
the creatures the box set free
sometimes i think they 're still here
just behind the walls
them and their hooks and their beasts
just waiting to break out again
except that i 've got the box
you 're still afraid
you would be
they tore me apart
so you were cheated
no
they gave me experiences beyond the limits
pain and pleasure indivisible
they took my body but my spirit
they left that here
in the boards in the walls
watching the world but not able to touch it
and the blood let you out
it gave me a little chance and i took it
they wo n't get me back
i 'm going to live and you 're going to help me
yes
yes
they 'll never find us
kirsty
hi
i got soaked
there 's a towel in the bathroom
which is where
just to your left
what happened
just an accident
he 's all right
will you drive
he needs stitches
sure
the keys are in the kitchen
kirsty
it 's very late
where 's daddy
what 's the problem
i have to see my father
of course
there 's no need to shout
you look terrible
have you had an accident
i was here this afternoon
this afternoon
i saw everything
i 'm sorry i do n't follow
what was there to see
no damn you --
oh my god
it 's one of these
we 're going to freeze to death
o.k. o.k.
maybe somebody changed the lock
like who
just a thought --
ah
it smells damp
it 's just been empty a while
not exactly modern
we 'll sell it
sell everything
i thought half of it was your brother 's
he wo n't complain
he can pay off some of his creditors
you know we have to let kirsty see this place before we do anything to it
she 'll love it
you mean we 're moving in
you 're still blaming me
no
i 'm not
you wanted to come back to london
we came back
all right
so what 's the argument
no argument
oh christ
julia
larry
i hear you
where are you
in here
he 's here
he 's been here
there 's stuff in the kitchen
he must have made a hasty exit
well
why not
we 'll move in sunday
is it deep
i do n't know i have n't looked
you know me and blood
you 're not going to faint
shit
let me see
it 's probably going to need stitches
i 'm going to throw up
no you 're not
take it slowly
so damn stupid
you 're done worse
i 'll be scarred for life
no you wo n't
look i 'm going to have to leave you guys to keep each other company
larry
anyway it 's bad luck to see too much of the bride before the wedding
would you excuse me
i think i 'm going to go to bed
are you o.k.
julia
i 'm here
sweetheart
i 've been calling you
are you all right
just feeling a bit sick
oh babe
i 'll be o.k. just leave me be a while
can i get you anything
maybe a brandy
sure
i 'll be down in a minute
o.k.
is this upsetting you
i 've seen worse
are you all right
fine
only i 'll turn it off --
-- i 'll go see
no
i 'll do it
larry
what 's wrong with you
oh baby
do n't go upstairs
come with me then
huh
please
what 's wrong with you
please
i ca n't bear it
what 's wrong
i do n't know where to begin
what are you talking about
it 's better you see for yourself --
dead
he was insane baby a mad dog
i put him out of his misery --
you know it 's not often i
you know
there 's a first time for everything
i suppose that 's right
you want something to drink
i 'm already way over my usual limit
you know it 's funny
i feel like i 've known you for years
well is n't it
i
suppose so yes
so what 's your problem
let 's get to it
you 're not going to change your fucking mind
no
no
let 's go upstairs
that 's more like it
is this your place
do you care
no not much
let 's keep it that way shall we
no personal details
that 's right
this is n't the bedroom
no
what 's going on
we do n't need a bed do we
i suppose not
i prefer the floor
first time for everything
that 's right
why do n't you take off your jacket
you 're warm
yeah why do n't i
oh christ
what 's wrong
too much drink
better empty my bladder
you 're awake
good girl
what happened to me
i 'll get the doctor
wait a moment --
who brought me in here
i wo n't be a moment
what a pretty tune
my father does n't answer
i have to go find him
i 'm afraid you 'll have to wait until the police have spoken to you
keep trying your father he 'll answer eventually
i called another friend of mine and he 's coming over
will you let him in
of course
this is n't a prison you know
look if you 'd prefer to tell me what happened instead of a policeman --
you would n't believe me
try me
well if you change your mind
what 's this friend 's name
steve
who 's there
daddy
kirsty
i got through
where are you
i found a room
what did you say
i said i found a room
great
well come over will you
see the place
maybe later in the week
first i 've got to find myself a job
what for honey
you know we can look after you
you 've made the gesture --
it 's not a gesture
i want to do this on my own
come on trust me a little will you
i do
i 'd just feel happier if you were with us
i 'll come over and see you in the next few days
you can show me the mansion
o.k.
you will keep in touch
of course
every day
o.k.
take care dad
call me tomorrow
i will
see you
big house
you like
me like
i 'll show you around when we 've got this damn bed moved
is julia here
upstairs
treat her gently huh
she hates moving
surprise
kirsty
o.k. i 'll be nice
you get on with the muscle work
i 'll make myself some coffee
kitchen 's through on your left
are you o.k.
sure
what are you drinking love
i 've forgotten
steve
i just wanted to be sure you were o.k.
never better
you sleep well
yeah
i love you honey
i love you too
... maybe we should never have come back
maybe you should give it some time
i guess
she 's not like mom
she 's
i do n't know
moody
i thought that was what you liked about her
you do n't like her at all do you
she does n't even want to leave the house
really
it 's like she 's waiting for something
what
i do n't know
i do n't know
it 's beyond me
it 's all right sweetheart
julia 's told me everything and it 's all right
no
you do n't understand
your brother -- frank -- he 's here in the house
and he 's --
whatever frank did was his error
and it 's finished with now
finished
he 's gone
gone
poor frank
he 's better off dead
i do n't believe it
i 'm afraid it 's true
i want to see
no you do n't
yes
show her
get the fuck out of here
what 's the problem
please
you 're in danger
no
it 's all over
it is n't
i know what 's going on here and it is n't over --
where are you going
i have to get out
we 're on the cointreau
that 's right
cointreau
i wo n't be able to stand
so lie down
you 're not going
just upstairs
need any help
i am house trained
why do n't you stay at larry 's house
there 's plenty of room
yeah there 's room
and there 's julia
i see
she 's so damn
english
meaning what
oh i do n't know
up tight
frigid
i beg your pardon
there ya go
i beg your pardon
we 're not all frigid
oh no
oh no
it 's not what i heard
well you 've just been talking to the wrong people
oh
are you alright
i 've been better
your father told me you were working here
if i make it through the day
i 'm sorry i should n't have surprised you
no it 's good to see you
are you busy after work
just trying to get my apartment in order
can i lend you a hand
as long as you do n't mind the smell of fur --
it 's a fetish of mine
steve
thank god you came
what happened to you
these things
they want to take me --
what things
what 's wrong
do n't let them take me steve --
i wo n't let anybody take you
bye
bye
do i know you
i do n't know
alison 's
really
long time ago
i was just thinking about her
i was her first boyfriend
rob
rob gordon
circa junior high
i hate to quibble with you rob but she married her first boyfriend
kevin bannister
you got ta be kidding me
that 's right
kevin
she 's mrs. kevin bannister
she lives in australia
really
married kevin
her junior high sweetheart
what chance would i have had against that
none no chance
that 's just fate
i beg your pardon
technically i 'm number one
i went out with her a week before kevin did
her first boyfriend
me
turn it off barry
it won't go any louder
what are you doing
i do n't want to hear public enemy right now
public enemy
all i 'm trying to do is cheer us up
go ahead and put on some old sad bastard music see if i care
i do n't want old sad bastard music either
i just want something i can ignore
but it 's my new tape
my monday morning tape
i made it last night just for today
yeah well it 's fucking monday afternoon
you should get out of bed earlier
do n't you want to hear what 's next
what 's next
play it
say it
little latin lupe lu
how can it be bullshit to state a preference
since when did this shop become a fascist regime
since you brought that bullshit tape in
great
that 's the fun of working in a record store
playing crappy pap you do n't want to listen to
i thought this tape was going to be you know a conversation stimulator
i was going to ask you for your top five records to play on a monday morning and all that and you just had to ruin it
we 'll do it next monday
well what 's the point in that
yeah
but now i kind of like it
i wanna date a musician
i wanna live with a musician
she 'd write songs at home ask me what she thought of them maybe even include one of our private jokes in the liner notes
... maybe a picture of me in the liner notes
what did you tell her about the shop for
i did n't know it was classified information
i mean i know we do n't have any customers but i thought that was a bad thing not like a business strategy
we 're only on the fucking list for marie 's gig at the pulaski pub that 's all
all three of us
that 's fucking great barry
we can spend fifteen bucks on a cab to save five each
fantastic barry
we can take your car
it 's not my car now is it
it 's laura 's car and thus laura has it
so it 's an ass bumping double- transferring bus ride through bumblefuck or a fat wad on a cab
wow
fucking great
what
what do you mean what
what are you snickering about
i 'm not snickering
i 'm smiling
because i 'm happy
what am i missing
what do you have to be happy about
okay
top five side one track ones
number one
janie jones the clash from the clash
ehh
thunder road bruce springsteen from born to run
smells like teen spirit nirvana nevermind
oh no rob that 's not obvious enough
not at all
dick did you hear that
shut up
let 's get it on marvin gaye from let 's get it on
airbag radiohead from ok computer
ooh
a kind of recent record
rob 's sly declaration of new classic status slipped into a list of old classics
nice
let 's get it on
could n't you make it more obvious than that
there 's something different about the sound of her voice
and what did she mean last night she has n't slept with him yet
yet
what does yet mean anyway
i have n't seen
evil dead ii yet
what does that mean
it means you 're going to go does n't it
-- you 're like a little squirrel of music storing away dead little nuts of old garbage music musical lint old shit shit shit --
-- barry if i were to say to you i have n't seen evil dead ii yet what would that mean
just
come on what would it mean to you
that sentence
i have n't seen evil dead ii yet
to me it would mean that you 're a liar
you saw it twice
once with laura -- oops -- once with me and dick
we had that conversation about the possibilities of the guy making ammo off screen in the fourteenth century
yeah yeah i know
but say i had n't seen it and i said to you i have n't seen evil dead ii yet what would you think
why would they care
because it 's a brilliant film
it 's funny violent and the soundtrack kicks fucking ass
i never thought i would say this but can i go work now
let 's pack it up
we have n't had a customer in four hours
fine by me
i still want pay to 7 o'clock
ha
un fucking believable
dick 's out on a hot date rob 's boning marie lasalle and the best looking and most intelligent of all of us is n't getting anything at all
how do you know about that
oh come on rob
what am i an idiot
i 'm more bothered by dick 's thing
how did this happen dick
what rational explanation can there possibly be
what 's her name
shut the fuck up barry
yeah you would say that would n't you
you two have to stick together now
boners united
united in getting some
do n't be sad barry
you 'll find true love someday
suck my ass
terrific
hey
what the fuck is that
my band
what band
the band that found me and asked me to join
you are not in a band barry
you are not a musician
and no posters
thanks for your support rob
really appreciate it
barrytown
barrytown
is there no end to your arrogance
i did n't make up the name
it 's the steely dan song
and it was in the commitments
you ca n't be called barry and sing in a group called barrytown
they were fucking called that before i was in it okay
it was n't my idea
that 's why you got the gig is n't it
is n't it
that was one of the reasons they asked me to join originally yes
but --
great
that 's fucking great
they only asked you to sing because of your name
you can stick it above the browser racks over there
how many tickets can i put you down for
none
christ
you 're not even coming
of course i 'm not coming
do i look like i 'd want to listen to some terrible experimental racket played in some hideous cave
where is it
the fucking bucktown pub
ha
so much for friends then
you 're a bitter bastard rob you know that
bitter
because i 'm not in barrytown
you should be shot like a lame horse you jerk
just keep that out of my window
the little skate fuckers
no way
yes way
it 's really
what the fuck is that
what
i heard you man
do n't give me that what shit
you just told them that you 're gon na put out a record with them
so
you even said they 're good
hello
do you see anyone else around here with a band mr. branson
mr. phil spector
like fuck you are
laura said we could
if we helped out with the posters and stuff
and we did
and we are
i 'll give you 10 of the door if you do n't play
we 're getting that anyway
what is she doing
okay 20
no
we need the gig
110
that 's my final offer
i 'm not kidding
that 's how much it means to me not to hear you play
we 're not as bad as you think rob
you could n't be
look barry
there 's going to be people from laura 's work there people who own dogs and babies and tina turner albums
how are you going to cope with them
we 're not called barrytown anymore by the by
they got sick of the barry barrytown thing
we 're called sdm
sonic death monkey
sonic death monkey
what do you think
dick likes it
barry you 're over thirty years old
you owe it to yourself and your friends and to your parents not to sing in a group called sonic death monkey
i owe it to myself to go right to the edge rob and this group does exactly that
over the edge in fact
you 'll be going over the fucking edge if you come anywhere near me next friday night
that 's what we want
reaction
and if laura 's bourgeois lawyer friends ca n't take it then fuck 'em
let 'em riot we can handle it
we 'll be ready
i 'm looking for a record for my daughter
for her birthday
i just called to say i love you
do you have it
oh yeah
we got it
great
can i have it then
no you ca n't
why not
because it 's sentimental tacky crap that 's why not
do we look like the kind of store that sells i just called to say i loved you
go to the mall and stop wasting our time
what 's your problem
what did i
why are you --
do you even know your daughter
there is no way she likes that song
or is she in a coma
it 's almost impossible to find especially on cd
yet another cruel trick on all of the dumbasses who got rid of their turntables
but every other echo and the bunnymen album --
i have all of the others
oh really
well what about the first jesus and mary chain
they always seemed
they always seemed what
they always seemed really great is what they always seemed
they picked up where your precious echo left off and you 're sitting here complaining about no more echo albums
i ca n't believe that you do n't own that record
that 's insane
well what about the new echo --
do not get ahead of yourself
mitch ryder and the detroit wheels
no
the righteous brothers
oh well
nevermind
what
nothing
no not nothing
what 's wrong with the righteous brothers
nothing
i just prefer the other one
bullshit
she should n't done it on the number four with a smile
is n't her album called number four with a smile
that 's what i said
no no no you said the number four with a smile and there 's no the at the front of the title of the album
it 's a reference to a chinese meal in toronto and i think that there is a the
but i could be wrong
you can be and are wrong
he 's got one
on clark street
a couple blocks
about six
we work there
you 'd love it
i ca n't go to the club tonight guys
why
who are you going to see
nobody
anna
anna who
anna green gables
anna conda
anna moss
anna moss
mossy
the mossy thing
the swamp thing
is she all green and furry
do n't do it rob
he 's not worth it
hey barry
oh hi
where 's rob
the malcolm mcclaren of clark street is in his executive suite
do you have an appointment
what are you talking about
just that rob seems to think it would be wiser to start a record label by putting out a record with business- crippling nazi youth shoplifters than with someone he knows in his bitter jealous heart is a musical visionary
that 's all
may i help you
i 'm looking for deejay rob gordon
uh
that 's me
i 'm caroline fortis from the reader
i want to do a story on you
right
why
well i used to go to the dodger on your nights and i saw you 're doing it again and that your putting out a record and it 's sort of a then and- now story against the backdrop of the chicago music scene with the emphasis on now
oh
okay
i thought i would ask you a few questions if that 's okay
huh
you used to come to the club
i should n't have let you in
you must have only been about sixteen
what i mean is i did n't mean you look young
you do n't
you do n't look old either
you look just as old as you are
a bit younger maybe but not a lot
not much
just right
so
is now a good time
right
so
you must have an enormous record collection
yeah
i could show it to you if you want to come over and see it
yeah well
let 's see
what are you 're all time top five records
pardon me
your desert island top five
oh boy
in the club or at home
is there a difference
of course
well yeah a bit
sin city by the flying burrito brothers is an all time top five but i would n't play it at the club
it 's a country rock ballad
everybody'd go home
nevermind
any five
so four more
what do you mean four more
well if one of them is this sin city thing --
can i go home and work this out and let you know
in a week or so
look if you ca n't think of anything it does n't matter
i 'll do one
my five favorite from the old days at the dodger
oh i 'm sure i can manage something
sin city
new rose by the damned
hit it and quit it by funkadelic
shipbuilding elvis costello japanese import no horns or different horns anyway
um
mystery train by elvis presley
and
spaced cowboy by sly and the family stone
a bit controversial i know but
fine
that 's great
is that it
well i would n't mind a quick chat if you got the time
sure but is that it for the list
that 's five
so
why did you decide to deejay again
well it was a friend 's idea really and the record release party seemed like a good place to do it
so
i should really put a james brown in there --
nice friend
yeah
what 's his name
who
oh
my friend
my friend is laura
a girl
a friend who 's a girl
music for old people
what does that mean
look i 'm sorry about this but i 'd like the upsetter by lee scratch perry in there
instead of sin city
okay
dance music for old people
oh you know
a lot of people are n't too old for clubs but they 're too old for acid jazz and garage and ambient and all that
they want to hear old funk and stax and new wave and old school hip hop and some new stuff all together and there 's nowhere for them
and the new label
and the kinky wizards
oh well the kinky wizards are -- you know what
why do n't i just make you a tape
would you
really
wow
i could have deejay rob gordon play in my own home
haha
right
it 's no problem
i love making tapes
rob hi so sorry i missed your call
in la on business
you know how it gets
yeah sure
good
great
yeah
wow
rob gordon
seems like a 100 million years ago now
yeah
a billion
right
how are you
fantastic but i 'm a little busy right now
listen
do you want to come to dinner saturday
i 'm having some friends over and i need a spare man
are you a spare man
uh
yes at the moment
great
got ta go
see you then
morning dick
oh hi
hi rob
good weekend
yeah ok
i found the first licorice comfits album at vintage vinyl
the one on testament of youth
never released here
japanese import only
great
i 'll tape it for you
no that 's okay
really
'cause you like their second one you said pop girls
etc
the one with cheryl ladd on the cover
you did n't see the cover though
yeah i have n't really absorbed that one
well i 'll just make it for you
okay
what 's this
the new belle and sebastian
like it
hey
did n't you steal that one already
can i help you
are you all right
yeah
i 'm sorry
look dick laura and i broke up
she 's gone
and if we ever see barry again maybe you can tell him that
course i will rob
no problem
no problem at all
i 'll tell him next time i see him
i 've ah
got some other stuff to tell him anyway so it 's no problem
i 'll just tell him about you know laura when i tell him the other stuff
fine
i 'll start with your news before i tell him mine obviously
mine is n't much really just about marie lasalle playing at lounge ax tonight
i like her you know she 's kind of sheryl crowish
but you know good
so i 'll tell him before that
good news and bad news kind of thing
or rather bad news and good news because he likes this person playing tonight
i mean he liked laura too i did n't mean that
and he likes you
it 's just that --
i understand dick
sure
course
rob look
do you want to
talk about it that kind of thing
i always hated this song
yeah
let 's not
i want a tape
i will now sell four copies of cats and dogs by the royal trux
do it
do it
well we rang 900 today
yeah but more than that
i 'm happy because i 'm proud of us
because although our talents are small and peculiar we use them to their best advantage
do n't worry about it dick
barry 's an asshole
yeah
well
i 'll see you tomorrow rob
i 'm sorry rob that 's it 's --
you 're a horrible person barry
i mean it
can i do anything
abraham martin and john
that 's a nice one
what is this
it 's vince and justin
who 's that
laura
are you okay
i am fine
i got ta go
goodbye
yeah i 'm fine
i 'm off the phone
you look upset
i 'm upset but i 'm fine
maybe i should talk to him
mmmm no
not a good idea
conflict resolution is my job laura
nothing to resolve ian
let 's get a drink
good
so shall we leave it at that then
i 've already left it you pathetic rebound fuck
now get your patchouli stink out of my store
good
so shall we leave it at that then
we wo n't leave it ian
not ever
so shall we leave it at that then
i dunno
think about it rob
you do n't have to go this second
you can stay until whenever
we 've done the hard part now
i might as well you know
well stay for tonight then
jeez
he goes on long enough
i should be so lucky
shit
hi
hi
i thought i could give you a lift back
are you coming home
yes
well i 'm coming over to your house to get some things
my house
how can you like art garfunkel and marvin gaye
it 's like saying you support the israelis and the palestinians
it 's not like saying that at all actually rob
art garfunkel and marvin gaye make pop records --
-- made
made
marvin gaye is dead his father shot him in --
-- whatever and the israelis and the palestinians do n't
art garfunkel and marvin gaye are not engaged in a bitter territorial dispute and the israelis and the palestinians are
art garfunkel and marvin gaye --
-- alright alright but --
-- and who says i like marvin gaye anyway
hey
marvin gaye
got to give it up
that 's our song
marvin gaye is responsible for our entire relationship
is that right
i 'd like a word with him
but do n't you remember
i remember the song
i just could n't remember who sang it
yes
look at me
look at our -- the apartment
what else do i have other than records and cds
and do you like it that way
not really
have you tackled the great reorganization yet
do n't you think there are more important things to talk about than my record collection
so
where have you been staying for the last week
i think you know that
had to work it out for myself though did n't i
i 'm sorry
i have n't been very fair to you
that 's why i came here to the store this evening
i feel terrible rob
this is really hard you know
good
so
is it my job
what
gimme a fucking break
is that what you think
that your not big enough a deal for me
jesus gimme a little credit rob
i do n't know
it 's one of the things i thought of
what were the others
just the obvious stuff
what 's the obvious stuff
i do n't know
i guess it 's not that obvious then
no
what
what what
did you say something
no
so
is it working out with ian
rob
do n't be childish
why is that childish
your living with the guy
i 'm just asking how it 's going
i am not living with him
i 've just been staying with him for a few days until i work out what i 'm doing
look this has nothing to do with anyone else
you know that do n't you
i left because we were n't exactly getting along and we were n't talking about it
and i suddenly realized that i like my job and i like what my life is could be turning into and that i 'm getting to a point where i want to get my shit together and i ca n't really see that ever happening with you and yeah yeah i sort of get interested in someone else and that went further than it should have so it seemed like a good time to go
but i have no idea what will happen with ian in the long run
probably nothing
well then why do n't you quit it while you seem to not be ahead
look
maybe you 'll grow up and we 'll get it together you and me
maybe i 'll never see either of you again
i do n't know
all i know is that it 's not a good time to be living here
so what you have n't definitely decide to dump me
there 's still a chance we 'll get back together
i do n't know
well if you do n't know there 's a chance right
it 's like if someone was in the hospital and he was seriously ill and the doctor said i do n't know if he 's got a chance of survival or not then that does n't mean the patient 's definitely going to die now does it
it means he might live
even if it 's only a remote possibility
i suppose so
so we have a chance of getting back together again
oh rob shut up
hey i just want to know where i stand
what chance --
-- i do n't fucking know what chance you fucking have
so how are you
have you slept with him yet
i told you i slept with him
no not -- i mean have you you know --
is that why you wanted to see me
i guess
oh rob
what do you want me to say
i want you to say that you have n't and i want it to be the truth
you kind of have to start with elvis costello but where
motel matches
i want you
i hope you 're happy now
green shirt
his records should be sealed in cases that say in case of vicious betrayal smash glass
where did you sleep last night sure but by robert johnson or by nirvana
maybe a liz phair track
there are a couple to get angry at instead of being angry with
some devil 's advocate stuff
the silver jews could be good when you 're ready to start putting it all behind you
but i think we 're getting ahead of ourselves there
ah
dylan
bob fucking dylan
now bob dylan would --the phone rings
he pulls off his headphones and picks it up but says nothing
you must have known it would happen
you could n't have been entirely unprepared
like you said i 've been living with the guy
we were bound to get around to it sometime
and anyway i keep trying to tell you that 's not really the point is it
the point is we got ourselves into an awful mess rob
are you there
what are you thinking
nothing
we can meet for another drink if you want
so i can explain it better
i owe you that much
look i got ta go
i work too you know
will you call me
i do n't have your number
call me at work
we can arrange to meet properly
i do n't want this to be the last conversation we have
i know what you 're like
you do huh
hello
it 's me
i figured it was
where are you
i think the big question here is where are you if you do n't mind my saying so and i think i know where you are
you 're running
on the run
you 're running from a point that everyone hits in any relationship and you 're just going to hit it again with ian but it 's going to be with a world music bunny- rabbit looking earth shoe wearing doctor who "- watching twit who does n't really understand you not the way that i do and will more in the future and you 'll have just wasted more time and arrive in the exact same place that you 're in now only later
and with
him
i 'm not -- hold on
are you still in love with me
jesus
i do not know
i 'll talk to you later
think about what i said
i mean if you want to experiment or whatever --
i 'm not experimenting
why do n't you go experiment
i do n't want to
do n't need to
i love you
you do n't ever think about other people
no
not really
i mean i think about it
but no i do n't really think about it
i called and called but you were out
i thought i 'd be gone before you got back
is that the last of it
yep
i might have missed some stuff
i 'm so used to some things being here that i do n't even notice them
those look heavy
where 's ian
he 's at home
listen i ca n't believe he went to the store
i 'm mortified actually
i 'm really sorry
he had no right to do that and i told him so
it was kind of funny
i 'm sure
you still together
going all right
i do n't really want to talk about it to be honest
that bad eh
you know what i mean
fix it up
it 'll make you feel better
i 'll bet you ca n't remember what you were doing here can you
i mean how much are you making now
sixty
seventy
and you were living in this shitty place
you know i did n't mind
and it 's not as if ray 's place is any better
i 'm sorry but can we get this straight
what is his fucking name ian or ray
what do you call him
ray
i hate ian
i hate him too
so i just call him mavis
or sissyboy
or mavis the sissyboy
hello
hey how ya doin'
guess who i just saw right by my store
ian
in starbuck 's
neat huh
i ca n't talk right now
god that 's a cold and a half
maybe you should bet back in bed
are you alright
pigsty
do n't worry about it
just get into bed
worry about that when you 're better
pig died
who the fuck 's pig
my dad died
my dad my dad
i 'm sorry
no no
when are you going home
in a minute
when i get it together
me
my dad liked you
and mom never told him we 'd split because he was n't up to it and
oh i do n't know
i do n't really understand it
i think she thinks he 'll be able to see what 's going on
it 's like
he 's been through so much what with dying and everything that she does n't want to upset him any more than she has to
do you want me to be there
i do n't care
as long as you do n't expect me to hold your hand
look are you coming or not
yes of course
liz'll give you a lift
she knows where to go and everything
i do n't have time to talk rob
i 've got too much to do
sure
i 'll see you on friday
are you going to lie in that flower bed all night
uh
no
you 're soaking
mmnn
you 're also an idiot
hello
it does n't seem so long ago that i looked at you from here
hi
i knew there was a reason i wore a skirt today
you know with ray
oh rob we 're not going to go through that again
no no
it 's not
are you still on the pill
yes of course
there 's nothing to worry about
i did n't mean that
i mean
was that all you used
look we can do other things
i lived with you
you were my partner just a few weeks ago and now you 're worried i might kill you and you 're entitled to worry
is n't that a terrible thing
is n't that sad
laura
i 'm too tired not to go out with you
so if you had a bit more energy we 'd stay split
but things being how they are what with you wiped out you 'd like us to get back together
everything 's too hard
maybe another time i would have the guts to be on my own but not now i do n't
what about ian
ray 's a disaster
i do n't know what that was all about except that sometimes you need someone to lob into the middle of a bad relationship like a hand grenade i guess and blow it all apart
mission accomplished
i know it 's not very romantic but there will be romance again at some stage i 'm sure
i just
i need you rob
that 's it
and we know each other and we care for each other and you 've made it clear that you want me back so
let 's go home
okay
okay
c'mon
i want to know
want to know what exactly
what it was like
it was like sex
what else could it be like
was it like good sex or was it like bad sex
what 's the difference
you know the difference
look we 're okay now
we just had a nice time
let 's leave it at that
okay that 's cool okay
but the nice time we just had
was it nicer as nice or less nice than the nice times you were having a couple of weeks ago
oh c'mon laura
just say something
lie if you want
it 'd stop me asking you questions and it 'd make me feel better
well i was gon na lie and now i ca n't because you 'd know i was lying
well why the fuck would you want to lie anyway
to make you feel better
oh great
all i 'm saying is you have to allow for things to happen to people most of all to yourself
otherwise what 's the use
no use
hi
hi
what are you doing
nothing
wanna go to dinner
where
at paul and miranda 's
paul from work
oh
well
we do n't really get along
paul and i.
i know
but you 've never met
it just seems like a stone unturned in your relationship with him
ha
you did that deliberately
you knew all along i 'd like them
it was a trick
i tricked you into meeting some people you 'd think were great
i thought it would be fun to introduce you to someone with a tina turner album and then see whether you still felt the same way
i called dan koretzky because he --
has drag city records i know i know
you told dan koretzky about this
yeah and he said it 's a good way to break out a record
especially for what he said and i quote would be a highly anticipated event locally
he helped me put out a press release
what
just local of course
and the triumphant return of dj rob gordon
triumphant
return
i had that idea when i was living with ian and it was such a good idea that i was annoyed we were n't together anymore
it might even be why i came back
you had no right
supposing i was doing something that could n't be cancelled
what do you ever do that ca n't be cancelled
that 's not the point
i mean what if the single is n't done in time
barry said its done
barry
barry knows about this
yeah
his band is playing a set
they 'll go on early
nobody will even be there yet and i told them they ca n't play for more than a half hour
it 's no joke
i 'm responsible for what happens you know
embarrassment aside there 's a lot of money and effort in this at least by my standards
i have to put down a deposit for the room
i have to pay the pressing plant for the records sleeve them sticker them --
we took care of that
i 'm sorry i 've been acting like a jerk
i do appreciate what you 've done for me and i know you 've done it for the best possible reasons and i do love you even though i act like i do n't
that 's okay
you seem pissed off all the time though
i know
i do n't get it
are you worried about tomorrow night
not really
are you going to talk to me or shall i get my paper out
i 'm going to talk to you
right
rob here
hey
it 's liz
what 's happenin
you called this morning
yeah
i just wanted to thank you for that message last night
it made me feel like
like less of an asshole
how 're you holding up
actually i 'm fine
i 'm great
last night i got to thinking you know what
maybe it is time to move on
maybe we 're just not right for each other
or maybe we are
but time will tell and at this point i 'm going to be fine with whatever 's meant to be
you know
yeah
like i said i do n't want to take sides
and i like laura with you
she 's more fun more open
you guys are good together
i just wish you two could i do n't know
i do n't think much of this ian guy --
what 's the -- hey liz --
-- no no no do n't even
i talked to laura rob
i talked to her and she gave me a little background
and you 're a fucking asshole
to think i sympathized with you for two seconds
poor rob
laura left him out of nowhere for the schmuck upstairs
you let me believe that
it 's true
rob
two years ago you got laura pregnant you then proceeded to cheat on her
you borrowed money from her and never paid a dime back
and then just a few weeks ago you told her you were unhappy with her and were kind of looking around for somebody else
well she --
so the minister says nice things and then what we all troop outside and they bury him
it 's a crematorium
you 're kidding
a crematorium
jesus
what difference does it make
is ray going
no
they do n't know him
and ken liked you
rob ken did n't die for your benefit you know
it 's like everybody 's a supporting actor in the film of your life story
is n't that how it is for everybody
enough liz
enough of what
i know i ca n't speak now because laura 's father died and i just have to take it because otherwise i 'm a bad guy with the emphasis on guy self centered
well i 'm fucking not not all the time anyway i 'm really sorry jo
but you know liz
i can either stick up for myself or believe everything you say about me and end up hating myself
and maybe you think i should but it 's not much of a life you know
maybe i 've been a little unfair
but is this really the time
only because it 's never the time
i ca n't go on apologizing my whole life you know
if by we you are referring to men then i have to say that just the once would do
good
'cause i 'm enjoying myself
good
so you live in chicago now
yup
not far from here actually
do n't you like that
no no i love it 's just thinking you 're you must be so sick of it
well
is that why you came to chicago in the first place
because of you know dividing up your record collection and stuff
yup
you share a place with t bone
no way
i 'd cramp his style
and i would n't want to listen to all that stuff happening on the other side of the bedroom wall
i 'm way to unattached for that
i understand completely
awhile back dick and barry and i agreed that what really matters is what you like not what you are like
yeah but if you heard this band called the crumblers you 'd --
what do you mean the crumblers
you know the crumblers
nobody 's heard the crumblers
except me
yeah i know the crumblers
i bought a used blasters album in new york about ten years ago and somebody left a crumblers single in it
my everything changed for a couple of weeks
books records films -- these things matter
call me shallow but it 's the damn truth and by this measure i was having one of the best dates of my life
yeah but you know what 's his best film and nobody 's even seen it
the conformist
exactly
fucking ex actly
you have n't even seen it
nor have you
are you okay
yes
you
for now
but i would n't be if i thought this was the end of the evening
i 'm sure it is n't
good
in that case i 'll fix us something else to drink
you sticking to the whiskey or you want coffee
whiskey
tops off two whiskeys and starts into the other room where she sees rob standing and holding his jacket
i 'd better go
i got ta get up early
go over to my parents
when i said before that i hoped it was n't the end of the evening i was you know
talking about breakfast and stuff
i 'd like it if you could stay the night
oh right
alright
jesus so much for delicacy
i pegged you for a master of understatement beating around the bush and all that buzz
i use it but i do n't understand it when other people use it
so you 'll stay
yeah
good
would you like me to turn the lights out
or would you like them on
god you ask a lot of questions
hi mom
everything all right
great
super fantastic
how 's the store
so so
up and down
your lucky laura 's doing so well
if it was n't for her i do n't think either of us would ever sleep
she left
she 's gone
what do you mean
where did she go
how would i know
gone
girlfriend
leave
not say where gone
laura move out
well call her mother
she just called
she does n't even know
it 's probably the last time i 'll ever hear her voice
that 's weird is n't it
you spend christmas at somebody 's house you know and you worry about their operations and you see them in their bathrobe and
i dunno
hello
anybody there
i 'm all right if that 's what 's upsetting you
you know that 's not what 's upsetting me
well it fucking should be should n't it
i knew this would happen
what are you going to do rob
i 'm going to drink this bottle of wine watch tv and go to bed
then tomorrow i 'll get up and go to work
and after that
meet a nice girl and have children
i promise the next time we talk i 'll have it all sorted out
i knew this was going to happen
then what are you getting so upset about
what did laura say
do you know why she left
it 's got nothing to do with marriage if that 's what you 're getting at
so you say
i 'd like to hear her side of it
mom
for the last fucking time i 'm telling you laura did n't want to get married
she is not that kind of girl
to use a phrase
that 's not what happens now
well i do n't know what happens now apart from you meet someone you move in she goes
you meet someone you move in she goes
what do you think
it 's the best collection i 've ever seen
give me fifty bucks and they 're all yours
these are worth at least i do n't know --
i know what they 're worth
give me fifty and get them out
but you must have --
i must have nothing
their my husband 's
and you must not be getting along too well right now huh
he 's in jamaica with a twenty three- year old
a friend of my daughter 's
he had the fucking nerve to call me and ask me to borrow some money and i told him to fuck off so he asked me to sell his singles collection and send him a check for whatever i go minus a ten percent commission
which reminds me
can you make sure you give me a five
i want to frame it and put it on the wall
it must have taken him a long time to get them together
years
this collection is as close as he 's ever come to an achievement
look
can i pay you properly
you do n't have to tell him what you got
send him forty five bucks and blow the rest
give it to charity
or something
that was n't part of the deal
i want to be poisonous but fair
look
i
i 'm sorry
i do n't want to be any part of this
suit yourself
there are plenty of others who will
that 's why i 'm trying to compromise
what about fifteen hundred
they 're worth five times that
sixty
thirteen hundred
seventy five
eleven hundred
that 's my lowest offer
and i wo n't take a penny over ninety
with eleven hundred he could come home and that 's the last thing i want
i 'm sorry but i think you better talk to someone else
fine
can i buy this otis redding single off you
sure
ten cents
oh come on
let me give you ten dollars for this and you can give the rest away for all i care
okay
because you took the trouble to come up here
and because you 've got principles
but that 's it
i 'm not selling them to you one by one
jesus
that thing 's been in the bargain bin for six months
was it just your criminal nature or what
hell i would 've given it to you for free
no we
uh yes i like do
it 's simple
you make the tracks -- recording studio -- deliver them to the pressing plant where a master is cut the master is then dubbed to submasters which are the mothers as their called for each press in the plant
you press the cd 's or records put in your cover art and that 's it
records are those big round black things right
fuck off
it 's rough
but it shows promise
we record a couple of songs right in a studio
i 'll take care of the rest
i 'll put out your record
any profits after recouping expenses get split down the middle between us and you guys
wait a minute
island records charged u2 a million five against their overhead for one plane ride
we 're not there yet justin
i 'm vince
whatever
we saw this ad in the personals for two swingers lookin for a renaissance fair
nice
what 's the name of your label
i ca n't figure out why he 's doing it
he 's been richard taupin at least since 1967
and the guys rich
you should see the stuff he has in that shop
maybe he 's hiding from something
some guy named smith was asking about him in church hill
i passed his name around with your buddies downtown but they drew a blank
so he is n't a cop
district anyway
probably just some exec ducking an ex wife
dr. kidell had a picture in his file of the funeral
the father looked just like richard
even had a mark on his cheek
how old is richard
p.d. says 41 but he barely looks 30
find the father
that should clear things up
taupin is n't that the guy moran picked up the other night
yeah
he 'd want to know about all this
mr. congeniality
let him find his own clues
there 's a journal article in this somewhere
uncle joey 's little girl
ca n't get the taste out of her mouth
well the cream of society awaits
if you 're ever in the neighborhood
sure
how 's your uncle
i hardly ever see him anymore
fine
did n't look like it came from toys are us that 's why i called you
did n't think it was my buddy over there
figured you knew more about swords than i did
claymore
huh
scottish claymore
take a french epee add twenty pounds of ballast so it means business and you 've got a claymore
you 're the expert
it 's in good condition
that stuff'll put you away if you 're not careful
there was a count
count dusan
he would invite the local peasants to his chateau fill them full of wine then slice their bellies so he could reuse it
the symmetry of that somehow always appealed to me
you 're very macabre
it 's my birthday
happy birthday
thanks
would you like more tea
no thank you i 'm fine
he was unsual
why
well this is a small town and it was even smaller then
most all the babies i delivered were from local families
richard 's parents were just passing through when his mother 's time came
i did it right here at the house
then you did n't know richard later on
no
i 've been trying to find somebody who knew him and any connections his family might have had with museums or historical societies
do n't know about any of that
suppose nobody does
i do n't follow you
poor little tyke did n't have a chance
hopelessly premature
he died a few days after he was born
the boy died
mother too
sad case it was
the young lady just could n't make it through labor
never even saw her son
have you spoken to anyone else about this
there was this one fella
asked a lot of questions
i was out of town but i heard he spent near a full day in the records office
would you remember his name
carl smith
this is against the rules
so 's playing choo choo with two high school cheerleaders in the middle of-
-okay okay
you owe me
besides i 'm cute
taupin richard marshall
born march 16 1945 in church hill maryland
received first driver permit 1967 in philadelphia
church hill that 's pretty close is n't it
anything in maryland is close
byzantine
basil the ii
charming guy basil
once after beating an army of serbians he blinded all but-
-all but one out of a hundred i know
all left to be led like donkeys back home
now if you will please-
good reflexes
good day miss cartwright
someone beat you
have you taken to touring small town cemetaries miss cartwright
grave robbers
probably
who
people like that rarely leave business cards
does carl smith
i do n't know what you 're talking about
i think you do
better yet i do n't think anything was stolen because nothing was there in the first place
and i think mr. smith whoever he is now knows that
you have an active imagination
i 've been to church hill
miss cartwright you are involving yourself in matters that do not concern you
i strongly suggest you return to washington and stay out of small town cemetaries
i have friends
i doubt that
good day miss cartwright
jesus christ
you 'll be safe here
he wo n't kill in a church
why not
tradition
what the hell is going on
he tried to kill me last night
where
dupont circle
who is he
at the moment
carl smith
and you
no
no one knows you 're here
no
i had to talk to you
you had to do nothing
you 're wrong
you 're a fool
maybe
is this what you killed them with
you 've been listening to rumors
our cars were seen together in felton
they 're calling me an accessory to murder
you are
now
what 's all that
richard taupin has become cumbersome
it would be best if he just disappeared
you did kill those men
not all of them
when you finish what then
i go my way and you can write all you want about the big bad mr. taupin
you make it all sound so simple
the only real difficulty comes in changing over the ownership of property i 've aquired
that requires certain records and most importantly a personal appearance at the county seat in gettysburg
but that 's where you come in
you want me to front for you
the less exposure i recieve around government buildings the better
you as mrs. taupin will attract considerably less attention than i.
there was a man once
just a simple woodcarver
but he understood
more than anyone he could see to the heart of it
it never ends
today is the same as the first
tomorrow will be the same as today
so much time
and all of it wasted
you love history
yes
i wish i could
the estate stuff is pretty straight forward
just lots of forms and an appearance at the county seat
it will take some time for the forms to clear before you go to gettysburg
no
so what now
we just wait
yes
well as long as we 're stuck here
it 's some sort of party the town is throwing
they do it each year
i thought it might be a nice break from all of this
i do n't know any of these
i 'll make a fool of myself
follow me
william taupin seems to have left his mark
yes
and you are william taupin are n't you
yes
you 're using your son 's name
no
just the child of some lonely girl i gave a ride to
when they died i put them in a grave with my name on it
twenty years later i became the son
then you must be at least 70 years old
at least
that 's impossible
it 's frightening sometimes the way you talk about other people 's lives
a factor of age
i hope i never get that old
you wo n't
i must be insane
leaving work ditching cops
all to follow a murderer
a very old murderer but a murderer just the same
why are you here
i 've been telling myself it 's the award winning journal article i 'm going to write
but it 's not
it 's you
i see
i 'm not even sure why
hardly a reason to run off with a murderer
my life has been chock full of people with complications and weak- nesses
i ca n't stand it
but you 're different
it 's in your hands
a clarity
you are a very perceptive young woman
just a little crazy
who are you
that would be difficult to explain
i 'd like you to try
i carried that rifle in world war i. this book is a 16th century policy report for the king of austria
the diploma is my con- ference of degree in latin from trinity college
class of 1672
it goes on
that 's why smith called you macleod
yes
he knows about you
he is older than i.
what could possibly be worth all this murder and distruction
sometimes i think it 's just for something to do
a conquest to be the last
something to hold onto while everything else around you withers and blows away
some- thing to replace the love that can never work
that 's insane
perhaps
there is something more
an inheritance
of bodies
i did n't kill the watchman
you killed those other two
not the same
what about that family in 31
sometimes innocents become involved
you and your buddy make a real team do n't you
exchanging eloquent threats in iambic pen- tameter while hacking up all the innocents in between
there are differences
you kill with your left hand
i have n't killed you_.
is that a threat
gettysburg 's an hour 's drive at most
you should be back by nightfall
will i see you again
be careful
do n't stay any longer than you have to
what 's wrong
i ca n't stand it
oh god i ca n't stand it
what is it
i 'm the last
oh christ i 'm the last one
get out
no
i 'll destroy you
i 've destroyed everything i 've ever touched
oh god
the emptyness
the years and years of void
nothingness
bordered only by the quest for ultimate nothingness
who would have guessed
the inheritance
not power
not control
life
it is the gift and the under- standing of life
you have lived forever
life is only life when it is bounded by death
the inheritance is death
the gift is the finality of life
to be part of the fabric
the inside
i love you brenna
it will be horrible
the future
i may die tomorrow or 10,000 tomorrows
i can promise you nothing
nothing but a moment
maybe two
but a moment of love is that not worth a lifetime
yes
forget it
i 'm just curious
you 're never just curious
you 've met my neice brenna
a murder
you better have a warrant
that 's my notebook you 've got no right to be sticking your fingers into it
i 've got a morgue filling up with bodies
that 's my right
what do you want from me
well the man of the hour that we all would like to talk to about now has apparently skipped town
and all of a sudden the smithsonian 's ambulence chaser is an expert on missing persons
i 'm calling an attorney
you and i should talk first
we 've got nothing to say
what are you going to tell them
that you 're protecting a man who 's killed four people
four
all fashionably without heads
spare me the details
but there 's more
wednesday someone played javelin with the cemetary curator in felton delaware
some locals spotted two cars with d.c. plates and surprise surprise they turn out to be registered to our own brenna cartwright and the ever popular richard taupin
what are you getting at moran
you 've been a busy little beaver
especially with that records mess up in church hill
your notes are very complete
naturally my feelings were crushed when you did n't rush right over and tell us what you knew
in fact we 're considering book- ing the ambulence chaser as an accessory to murder
it 'll never stick
but we might just give it the ole college try
what with the court back ups it could be days before you got an arraignment
but then i 'm sure the flunk out neice of the d.a. knows all about that
you 're an asshole moran
i want taupin
what makes you so sure he 's the one
just for laughs we raided wonder boy 's house
there was a gallon of one of the corpse 's blood in his carpet
i think it was about then i withdrew his name for humanitarian of the year
what 's all of this got to do with me
what were you doing in felton
research
if your pal was there i never saw him
i have witnesses that can put the two of you together
never take up poker detective
do n't be stupid lady
your neck can be sliced as fast as anyone else 's
come on brenna your ass is already in a sling do n't drag me into it
all i need is for you to check the name
you talked to your supervisor lately
he 's burning up the place about you just dropping out of sight
that on top of the cops bugging him
i 'll take care of that corey but i need this now
corey you owe me
it 's that important
yeah
good way to lose your job
some job
card filing and cabinet dusting
four years in this dump and i have n't written anything for wilson that a wounded yak could n't do
i liked the bit you did about baltic chastity belts
too bad no one else did
it 's bullshit
everything
my job the people i get involved with i 'm up to here with it
you always were hard to impress
who is it
not who
what
worstick 's a town in pennsylvania
i do n't believe him
why
he 's too cool
too sharp
i think he 's got something to do with it
requiem acer'nam donaei-
what are you doing man
-et lux perpetua-
you 'll not be bringing the church into this
-luceat ei-
be quiet
-auditorium nostrum-
stop
-in nomine sanctus esperitu-
stop
afternoon
your name is conor
aye
juan cid romirez
chief surveyor and alchemist
you 're not from these parts
i am from spain
and i would like a moment of your time
i have n't much to offer mr. romirez from spain but you 're welcome to what 's here
please go to no trouble
your back it would seem perhaps you were injured in battle
five years past me clan fought another over some- thing i can not even re- member
your marks would suggest great injury
i was nearly killed
but you lived
i did at that
and but for a mark you are well as any man no
aye
i should imagine that your recovery must have alarmed your fellow villagers perhaps giving them reason to invent an explanation
and a solution
i was driven out
and now you live in a small village miles away from all you knew
how can you know this
first food no
a good meal makes conversation so much easier
hmm que rico
what is it you call this
pheasant
you scots have a way with game
it still has life in it
spirit
back home the food is so
domestic
why are you here
i was sent by his majesty of spain to inverness as a con- sultant on matters of metal
you 're a long way from inverness
in my travels i heard the story of the macleod boy struck down and brought from the hand of death by powers not of this earth
you know me home
me name
it was time for our paths to cross
conor you and i we can not be killed
what
we are immortal
it is as you are
no
listen to me
hear the words
this is madness
it is the truth
no
three days you 've laid there
it 's time you ate
this ca n't be
you are not dead boy
accept it
this is monstrous
i 'll burn in hell for all eternity
you 'd have to die first
aqui
what is to become of me
am i to wander the earth forever like a ghost
you will live
survive
then they were right
i am evil
this is god 's punishment
you have done nothing wrong conor macleod
oh my god
oh my god i 'm lost
why does he want to kill me
you recall how i spoke of the push you feel and how i make it less
aye
it is always less with my living
far or near
but if i were to die the push would become stronger than ever before
there is power in this
and as long as you and i live the knight can never have it all
but we can not be killed
there is an imperfection
for all your healing if your head ever leaves your neck you are dead
you can survive anything but steel against your threat
then it is over
the end
how can i stop such a man
hide
run to the ends of the earth till you learn
you must learn to defend yourself
in this i can help
why
we are brothers
and you are a defense- -of sorts
harder
concentrate harder
me arm hurts
again
try again
harder
you swing like an impotent cow
go to hell
oh the boy has a mouth now if only he had an arm
you have a gift
one you must protect
and what is this great gift that can not be seen or smelt
the fabric of life
the spark that allows the passing of existence from one generation to another
if that was meant to be an ex- planation mr. romirez from spain i 'm afraid you 've failed
you 're no match for scot mr. romirez
we 're raised as riders
point conceeded mr. macleod
what is the fascinatioon
it is only a leaf
all living things pay dues conor
they must be respected for that
as they age they contribute to a sum that is the kindling from which all future life comes
to feel it to know it is to be in touch with the will of every living thing
i do not think i like the sound of that
it does not feel nearly as frightening as it sounds
but the consequences of such feelings can be very frightening
for it gives you great strength
the strength of knowledge_. the ability to stand between the giving of what has always been to what will always be
i feel hardly nothing
you have not been fully trained
but you will learn
and you will be good i can feel that
you have apt- itude
this is why our friend is so concerned
but why be so concerned about me
this power is divided amongst you me and others like cuts in a pie
but the cuts are not equal
some like you and he have more
much more
and you
i am a small player
but if by helping you i can keep that monster from being the last then perhaps my life has meant something
i am not ready for this
you must be
you have responsibilities
you must learn the rules
you can never attract attention to yourself never show the side that will draw others to you
you will always know when you are in the presence of another
beware
but more importantly conor macleod will be your battle against time
in the coming years you will see kingdoms rise then rot like wheat
people will become a transitory pathetic lot
the only constant you will know will be the others and the tradition their greed and quest represent
but life without morality without the ability to truly taste the sweetness of wine and love is no life at all
that is how the others exist
nothing more than walking corpses living only to slaughter each other in an insane quest to be the last
keep your soul sewed to the earth
do not become one of them
of course
you are young inexperienced
you do not know what time can do
how it can sap all pity all love
that is not me
with the proper tools conor a naive man can be much more dangerous than an evil one
go ahead senor
i have my friend to keep me company
i 'll be back when i can
i 'm your future husband remember
i have no future husband
i do n't understand
not a week ago your father gave us his blessing
my future husband died in battle against the sutherlands
what are you saying
i 'm standing here as real as you
you can not be real conor
you had the last rites
no man has been cut half as bad and lived
but i did live
live
in less than a week you 're prancing about the country like a squirrel
so why the crazy talk
it 's a miracle it is
saint andrew has smiled on me
on us
some think not
who
there 's rumor in the village
some call it magic
that 's mad
surely you do n't take their word
i do n't know conor
it 's not natural
maybe something has touched you
you 're sounding like that mad woman widow baggins
me father has taken back my hand
please not be touching me conor
i 'll not take that kind of talk from you
from those others below maybe
but not from you
leave me alone conor
please
you 're not talking sense mara
that 's wonderful
where did you ever learn it
far away
kiss me
david
do you have cause to bothering us
who am i deceiving
certainly not me
state of grace and all that
tradition
it 's all we have
not so scared
perhaps not
you seem to have misplaced a private
no doubt by now his head is stranger to his neck
no doubt
you surprise me
eliminating a rival like that
such are the actions of a man of conquest
i was mistaken
300 years have turned the boy 's fear into ambit- ion
you 're wrong
i know you very well conor macleod
and i can see the truth beginning to make itself clear to you
mulet romirez they were fools without vision
it was destined that the board would be cleared for the real players
romirez understood
not you
romirez is dust
finish your prayers
finish yours
our common heritage
i am your only real friend you know
the only one who truly understands you
i look forward to the day we meet again
and i kill you
so sure
complete your inspection
they 're nothing but boys
it will be a slaughter tomorrow
i doubt much can change that
the enemy has five brigades waiting for us
we need more time
wo n't get it
we are a sacrifice
a diversion
i thought i gave orders the regiment was to drill
staff sargeant detailed me to prepare firewood for the break- fast cooking
what is your position
second musketeer
i understand you joined up in bremen
you seem to understand a great deal
i am a major private
you would do well remembering that when addressing me
excuse me sir
i thought we spoke as equals
equals
if you wish to play games major
wait
i think we understand each other
we have no understanding
then it is time two of us did
you are very young
i was once young
i can help
help
i 've seen others help
somehow a head always ended up on the counter
it can be different
it must be
it never changes major
we must talk
stay out of it
do n't threaten me private
who do you think i am
one of your freckle faced children waiting to die tomorrow
threaten you
you and i just living will always be a threat
forever
look at your life major
look at mine
nothing there but threat
threats and nothingness
it 's what we live for
do not turn your back on me
you are really going to force this are n't you
either you are with me or against me
you see major
you are not so different
i had no choice
ah conor how you look a man
have you time for some- thing to eat
your grandfather wore that in his service to the king and i to fight for the duke
must he go
aye
it is his duty
all of ours
but ian he 's still but a boy
he 's a macleod
i want people in here to check over every piece of this stuff
figure she 's with him
yeah
we ran down that church hill info
she 's right
there is no richard taupin
any other i.d.s come up
not yet
called fbi yesterday
thompson 's going to try cia this afternoon
y'never know
should have seen him the first night
son of a bitch stood there with a quart of blood on his pant leg and did n't even blink
you 'd think he 'd had practice
are you sure
wo n't know till the records department comes back with it this after- noon
looks good though
they found the receipt in his townhouse
it was pretty smeared but had taupin 's father listed as a signatory
round up who you can and put them on standby
think we should call the local p.d. out there first
no
i want this to be all ours
where
i do n't know
what name is he using
smith
carl smith
how many came
the last four
and the bulgarian
he got him
he always does
eventually
he knows i 'm here
how
none of this would be happening if you had n't run
answer me
we learned he 'd found the immigration notaries in liverpool and traced them to new york
then he figured out the birth records in church hill
spare a chair
kahn
are you going to offer me a chair or leave me standing here all night
sit
how are you
head still secure to the neck
how did you find me
how many places this side of the atlantic serve lager and lime
i 'll never forget the look on that papal commander 's face when his heretic stronghold turned out to be a rock full of whores climbing all over neuvich
neuvich the clown of the crusades
but then rides up pope pius who calmly brushes the dust from his papal cross climbs off his papal horse draws his papal sword and asks just what the hell is going on
and what did neuvich dear dear drunken neuvich do
offered the pope one of his whores
had a great swing with his blade
for a pope
good times then
a man could stretch his legs without bring- ing half the world down around his ears
not like now
he found us even there
he always did
i have n't drunk this much since-
-since you last saw me
i love zoos
ever since i was a kid
you were never a kid
i knew his great grandfather
you 're insane
no seriously
we used to shoot pool together in rangoon
how do you do it kahn
how do you live so full of life for so long
tasting and enjoying life is the only thing of value we have
all else is just marking time
you 're marking time
i 've had a few more concerns
the pressure only comes when you let the taste slip into your mouth
you 're wrong
you do n't run as hard macleod
you just do n't run as hard anymore
long time
not so long
run
macleod
you disappoint me
i thought you 'd finally gotten over that sort of thing
leave her out of this
as you wish
what 's the point
this is n't done
get up
what 's the point
you have me finish it
i have waited forever for this
you will not cheapen it little boy
tradition
it 's all we have
go to hell
perhaps miss cartwright would like to play
leave her alone
get up
we have some unfinished business
are you here
i want you to come to me
and if i refuse
give me an address where i can forward miss cart- wright 's head
yes laddie i have her
should i care
this your present address
yes
mr.- taupin what were you doing in that alley
i was walking by when i heard a shout
your men came right after
did you know the victim
no
his name was iman fasil if that jogs your memory
it does n't
he was carrying a syrian passport and had been in the country less than a week
two days ago a bulgarian national was murdered the same way
he 'd also been in the country less than a week
what is your citizenship
american
do you know what this is
i presume it 's a sword
a claymore to be exact
you would n't know anything about it would you
your murder weapon
it was covered with mr. fasil 's fingerprints but none of his blood
a mystery
for the moment
my condolences
where were you tuesday night
home
a neighbor saw your car leave
he 's mistaken
look i do n't know what the hell you 're up to but i think i 've got a pretty good idea
do you
all i need is time
i 've got all the time in the world
except right now
if you will excuse me lieutenant
ah steven it is good to see you
i only just heard of conor
i came up from catroch as soon as i could
you 're a kind man to be sure
i thought it only proper to pay me last respects to the family
steven conor did n't die
but i had heard his wounds were mortal
they were steven they were
it 's been a miracle it has
he lasted right through and healed
no one in the village has ever seen anything like it
ever
when your father died i saw to it that the grounds were kept up
the money in the estate was enough to cover your costs
oh yes more than enough
you 're one of william 's kids huh
his only kid
sure take after him
never seen a father and son look more alike
we were very close
the resemblance is amazing
when may i expect the cleaners
i 'll send them right up
morning mr. north
same
such a pretty day
if i live to be 90 i 'll never tire of mornings like this
mind you i 'm 74 now
no
yes sir
when you get older your priorities change
it 's the simple things that count
without them growing old can be a very lonely thing
i 'm sure that 's true
nothing to be sorry about
just your pappy scared some
ca n't you say hello to a fellow
hildy
are you back
no just a farewell appearance batting for sweeney
i 'm going into business for myself
what doing
i 'm getting married tomorrow
well congratulations
good luck
who is it
what 's the idea of locking this
that 's bensinger
that 's his desk
bensinger -- of the tribune
open this door
ai n't you got any more sense than to --
oh h hello mr. burns
why quite an honor having you come over here
hello bensinger
excuse me i just want to --
how do you mean
i was having a little chat about you just this afternoon -- with our mister duffy
nothing -- ah -- detrimental i hope
i should say not
that was one swell story you had in the paper this morning
oh did you -- care for the poem mr. burns
the poem
the poem was great
remember the ending
-- and all is well outside his cell but in his heart he hears the hangman calling and the gallows falling and his white haired mother 's tears
heartbreaking
how would you like to work for me
what
duffy
i 'm sending bensinger over to see you
mervyn is n't it
no
roy
roy v.
of course
roy bensinger the poet
of course you would n't know
you probably never heard of shakespeare either
put mr. bensinger right on the staff
how much are you getting on the tribune roy
seventy five
i 'll give you a hundred and a by- line
let him have everything he wants
now hustle and write me a story from the point of view of the escaped man
he hides cowering
afraid of every light of every sound
hears footsteps
his heart going like that
and all the time they 're closing in
get the sense of an animal at bay
sort of a jack london style
exactly
i wo n't be more than ten minutes i promise you
even ten minutes is a long time to be away from you
i said -- uh -- i said even ten minutes -- is a long time -- to be away from you
do n't be embarrassed bruce
i heard it but i just wanted to hear it again
i can stand being spoiled a little
the gentleman i 'm going to have a chat with did very little spoiling
i 'd like to spoil him just once
sure you do n't want me to go in with you
my job bruce
i started it -- and i 'll finish it
i suppose you 're right -- but if it gets rough remember i 'm here
i 'll come a running pardner
oh it is n't like that
it will be perfectly all right walter
mother is coming with us on the train
you know hildy he 's not a bad fellow
you 're so nice bruce you think everybody else is
oh he 's not the man for you
i can see that
but i sort of like him
got a lot of charm
he comes by it naturally
his grandfather was a snake
if anybody had told me i 'd be sitting at lunch with him -- but he swept me right off my feet
that 's what he did to me
swept me right off my feet -- and left me lying on the floor
too hot
no
it 's strong
but i like it that way
say what 's happened to burns
he looks sunk does n't he
he certainly -- hic -- does
i do n't use my wife for business purposes mr. burns
wait a minute bruce
what 's commission on a 100,000.00 policy
well at his age twenty payment life a little over a thousand dollars
and what 's the matter with a thousand dollars
but --
according to the budget we laid out that 's more than our food bill for a whole year
listen bruce i do n't want walter burns to use me but i 'm perfectly willing to use him
how long will it take to get him examined
i could get a company doctor in twenty minutes
about twenty five hundred dollars
better make that a certified check walter
all right
i 've done it
now are you satisfied
fine
and here 's a kiss for you
what 's the matter
i lost my wallet
the check bruce
that 's right here
gee it was lucky your telling me about that old newspaper superstition
yes was n't it
i ca n't imagine who did it
i ca n't think of any enemies i have
i 'm sure you have n't any
for a minute i thought maybe walter burns was at the back of it
but then i realized he could n't have been
oh no
how could you ever think of such a thing
oh i realized right away
he 's really a very nice fellow hildy -- i found that out
yes he is
look bruce we 're taking that next train -- and when i say next train this time i mean it
did you finish the interview
the criminal courts building
no -- but i 'm sure it 'll be all right with walter
but gee hildy -- he gave us that insurance business -- and you promised --
well the story 's practically finished
i 'll just go upstairs and send it over with a messenger
hildy
hello bruce
bruce
how 'd you get out
not through any help of yours hildy
bruce i know but i was in the biggest jam --
i waited and waited and then i had an idea and wired albany to send me a hundred dollars so i could get out on bail
i do n't know what they 'll think -- they sent it to the police station
we 'll explain the whole thing to them
i know i got you into this hildy but it does seem to me that you ca n't care much for me if you 're willing to let me stay locked up for two hours
bruce you know i 'm mad about you and stop talking like that
walter
oh she was here
where 'd she go
out some place
just a second walter
here bruce here 's the check
and oh bruce here 's your wallet
i got it back
you got it back eh
there 's something funny going on around here
i 'm taking the nine o'clock train hildy
and you can meet us at the station
fine
mr. burns --
i 've just told you i was busy with mr. bruce baldwin
i 'm bruce baldwin
you 're bruce baldwin
yes
then who are you
this is a pleasure mr. baldwin and i 'm sorry about the mistake
oh i thought there was something funny
you see bruce you do n't mind if i call you bruce do you
after all we 're practically related --
mr. -- well -- no -- no -- not at all
you see my wife -- i mean your wife -- that is i mean hildy -- had led me to expect that she was marrying a much older man
oh
but i see she did n't mean old in years
you always carry an umbrella bruce
well er -- it looked a little cloudy this morning
that 's right
-- rubbers too i hope
a man ought to be prepared for any emergency
attaboy
come on bruce
where are we going
where are we going
i 'm going to buy you two lunch -- did n't hildy tell you
no -- she did n't
just wanted to surprise you i guess
down
after you bruce
come on hildy my treat
well so you 're getting married tomorrow eh
how does it feel bruce
feels awful good
yes sir -- we 're taking the four o'clock train to albany and tomorrow we 'll be married
taking the train today -- and being married tomorrow
mother
but your mother --
no
my mother
oh
your mother -- well of course that relieves my mind
mighty nice little town albany
they 've got the state capitol there you know
yes i know
hildy will you ever forget the night you brought the governor back to your hotel room and found me taking a bath
she did n't even know i was in town
how 's business bruce
well albany 's a mighty good insurance town
most people there take it out pretty early in life
i do n't blame them
i sometimes wish i 'd taken out insurance -- but of course now it does n't matter
still i suppose it would have been the smart thing to do
well i honestly feel that way
i figure i 'm in one line of business that really helps people
of course we do n't help you much when you 're alive -- but afterward -- that 's what counts
i see what you mean
anything the matter
just sweeney again
one of my best reporters
just what is the lowdown on williams
it 's simple
a poor little dope who lost his job went berserk and shot a cop who was coming after him to quiet him down
are you sure williams is not all there
all you 've got to do is talk to him
but the mayor would hang his own grandmother to be re elected
but could n't you show the man was n't responsible
how
how long would the interview take
oh -- an hour for the interview
another hour to write it
we could take the six o'clock train hildy
if it would save a man 's life
i never knew hildy to be so determined before
you have n't seen anything yet
well she 'll know some day
that 's all i ask
oh wait a minute
do n't want to forget this you know
might start to rain again
thanks
i 'll phone hildy right away to get that story
well anyway i know hildy 's getting a good man
thanks a lot
well i got to get back
you can find your way out ca n't you
oh sure
well thanks for everything
do n't thank me
i should thank you
so long
so long
hildy
what the devil do you want
listen bruce you ca n't come in here now
we 're busy
where you been duffy
stick around
what
what chinese earthquake
the deuce with it
what 's that
no -- i was just talking to one of the guys at the office
oh
i wonder what 's keeping mother
she was supposed to come down and get you
and i 'll take that certified check too
i 've decided i can handle things around here
come on hildy we 've got to keep going
sorry bruce but --
i 'll see she 's there bruce i promise you
if she 's not there mother and i are leaving anyhow
oh this is all right bruce
i just wanted to be sure
say i want to be sure too
who do you think you are breaking in here like this
you ca n't bluff me burns
i do n't care who you are or what paper you 're editor of
if you 've any accusations to make hartman make them in the proper manner
otherwise i 'll have to ask you to get out
you 'll ask me to what
get out
close that door
do n't let anybody in or out
i can explain that hartman
when hildy told me she wanted to interview earl williams i thought it might be dangerous and i gave her a gun to defend herself
oh you did
well that 's very very interesting
this happens to be the gun that earl williams shot his way out with
you 're barking up the wrong tree hartman
i 'll give you three minutes to tell me where he is
no
well -- johnson you 're under arrest
you too burns
who 's under arrest
you pimple headed square toed spy -- do you realize what you 're doing
i 'll show you what i 'm doing
burns you 're guilty of obstructing justice and so is the morning post
i 'm going to see that the post is fined ten thousand dollars for this
you 'll see nothing of the kind sheriff
we 'll just start by impounding the post property
is that your desk
hartman if you take this desk out of this building i 'll put you behind bars
you will eh
well we 'll see about that
all right boys
take it
i 'm warning you -- it 'll be a federal offense
and you 'll be an accessory
we 'll take a chance on that burns
go ahead boys
what about this burns
kidnapping eh
oh trying to frame me eh
i never saw this woman before in my life
what 's this
get out of here you
does it
you forget the power that always watches over the morning post
your luck 's not with you now
duffy
get liebowitz
all the lawyers in the world are n't going to help you
this is the morning post you 're talking to
the power of the press huh
that 's absurd on the face of it mr. burns
he 's talking like a child
out of the mouths of babes
he 's insane or drunk or something
why if this unfortunate man williams has really been reprieved i personally am tickled to death
are n't you pete
save that for the tribune
what did you say your name was -- pinkus
what do you want
why i 'm surprised mr. burns
that 's no way to talk to your wife -- even if she 's no longer your wife
hello hildy
hello walter
hi louie -- how 's the slotmachine king
how long is what
you know what
how long since we 've seen each other
let 's see
i was in reno six weeks -- then bermuda
oh about four months i guess
seems like yesterday to me
maybe it was yesterday
been seeing me in your dreams
no -- mama does n't dream about you any more walter
you would n't know the old girl now
oh yes i would
i 'd know you any time --
you 're repeating yourself
that 's the speech you made the night you proposed
-- any time -- any place -- anywhere
i notice you still remember it
i 'll always remember it
if i had n't remembered it i would n't have divorced you
you know hildy i sort of wish you had n't done it
done what
divorced me
it sort of makes a fellow lose faith in himself
it almost gives him a feeling he was n't wanted
holy mackerel
look walter that 's what divorces are for
nonsense
you 've got the old fashioned idea that divorces are something that last forever -- till death us do part
why a divorce does n't mean anything today
it 's only a few words mumbled over you by a judge
we 've got something between us nothing can change
i suppose that 's true in a way
i am fond of you walter
i often wish you were n't such a stinker
now that 's a nice thing to say
well why did you promise me you would n't fight the divorce and then try and gum up the whole works
well i meant to let you go -- but you know you never miss the water till the well runs dry
a fellow your age hiring an airplane to write hildy do n't be hasty -- remember my dimple
walter
it held things up twenty minutes while the judge ran out to watch it
well i do n't want to brag but i 've still got the dimple -- and in the same place -- i just acted like any husband who does n't want to see his home broken up
what home
i tried to tell you right away but you started reminiscing
i 'm getting married walter and also getting as far away from the newspaper business as i can get
i 'm through
get married all you want to hildy but you ca n't quit the newspaper business
you ca n't sell me that walter
who says i ca n't
you 're a newspaper man
that 's why i 'm quitting
i want to go some place where i can be a woman
i know you hildy and i know what it would mean
it would kill you
a journalist
peeking through keyholes -- running after fire engines -- waking people up in the middle of the night to ask them if they think hitler 's going to start a war -- stealing pictures off old ladies of their daughters that got chased by apemen
i know all about reporters -- a lot of daffy buttinskies going around without a nickel in their pockets and for what
so a million hired girls and motormen 's wives will know what 's going on
no walter i 'm through
where 'd you meet this man
bermuda
bermuda
rich eh
not what you 'd call rich
makes about five thousand a year
what 's his line
he 's in the insurance business
the insurance business
it 's a good honest business is n't it
oh sure it 's honest
but somehow i ca n't picture you with a guy who sells policies
well i can and i love it
he forgets the office when he 's with me
he does n't treat me like an errand boy -- he treats me like a woman
he does does he
how did i treat you -- like a water buffalo
i do n't know about water buffaloes but i know about him
he 's kind and sweet and considerate
he wants a home -- and children
say sounds more like a guy i ought to marry
what 's his name
well i 'll give you a hint
by tomorrow they 'll be calling me mrs. bruce baldwin
tomorrow
tomorrow
as quick as that
the quicker the better
well -- i finally got out what i came in to tell you
so long walter and better luck next time
i wish you everything i could n't give you hildy
thanks
too bad i could n't see this guy first
i 'm pretty particular about whom my wife marries
well he 's waiting in the anteroom for me now
say could i meet him
oh better not walter
would n't do any good
you 're not afraid are you
afraid
i should say not
all right then come on and let 's see this paragon
is he as good as you say
better
then what does he want with you
now you got me
nothing personal
i was just asking
you would n't believe this walter but bruce holds the door open for me
no kidding
and he takes his hat off when he 's with a lady
what for
and when he walks with a lady he waits for her
oh i 'm sorry
allow me
thanks
i suppose i ca n't call this off without creating a scene -- but remember it 's your last fling
how do you like that
here i am being nice to you and your sweet heart and that 's the thanks i get
well i 'll tell you one thing old man she never looked at me the way she 's looking at you
i might have walter but you were never there
anyway i 'm glad you two are going to be happy and have all the things i could n't give her
you know hildy is about the best reporter in the country -- and that goes regardless of sex
but all she really ever wanted was a home
here 's luck to the bride and bridegroom
thank you
no bruce dear
do n't you see
this is a trick to get your sympathy
no walter i 've been waiting for something like this -- but i was n't sure when you 'd spring it
if you want to save earl williams life you can interview him yourself
you 're still a good reporter
bruce and i will be on that four o'clock train -- and thanks just the same
i 'm an editor
i know what ought to be written but i ca n't write it the way you could
it needs a woman 's heart --
why walter you 're getting poetic
you see what i had to put up with
she never trusted me
you argue with her -- otherwise you 're going on a honeymoon with blood on your hands
how can you have any happiness after that
all through the years you 'll remember that a man went to the gallows because you were too selfish to wait two hours
i tell you earl williams face will come between you on the train tonight -- and at the preacher 's tomorrow -- and all the rest of your lives
what a performance
bravo
do n't let him fool you bruce -- it 's only an act
what do you mean only an act
have n't you got any feeling
well it 's either an act on your part or a miracle on sweeney 's
what do you mean
i happen to know sweeney was married only three months ago
if he 's got twins this morning i claim it was done with mirrors
all right hildy i 'm licked
but i 'll make you and bruce a business proposition
we 're not interested
maybe you 'll be
you 're a smart young man
you let hildy do this story for me and you can write out a 100,000.00 insurance policy for me
what do you say
now you 're talking
you keep out of this
bruce suppose you examine mr. burns in his office
i 'll get my bag and go over to the press room in the criminal courts building
you phone me as soon as mr. burns has given you his check
then i 'll go get the interview and you phone mother that we 're taking the six o'clock train
and no tricks walter
what tricks would i pull
oh nothing
of course you might cancel the check
yes
wait a minute
what would be his first payment on that policy
what do you think i am -- a crook
yes --- and that 's putting it mildly
no certified check -- no story -- get me
all right
the check will be certified
want my fingerprints
no thanks i 've still got those
well i 'll step into some working clothes and hop over to the press room for the background on this yarn
it 'll be kind of fun to see the boys again too
remember bruce it must be certified
exclusive
that 's great
it cost me four hundred and fifty bucks to tear it out of cooley
never mind that
what 's the story
never mind it
that 's not my money
that 's bruce 's money
you 'll get it
now what 's the story
i 'll have the paper send the money right down to you
i swear it on my mother 's grave
wait a minute
your mother 's alive
i meant on my grandmother 's grave
do n't be so technical hildy
what 's the story
well this expert dr. egelhoffer from new york decides to make williams re enact the crime --
well i 'm coming to it
it seems the professor had to have a gun to re- enact the crime with -- and who do you suppose supplied it
nobody else but that great thinker sheriff hartman
no kidding hildy
say this is n't a rib
no this is on the level walter
i 'm not good enough to make this one up
the sheriff gave his gun to the professor the professor gave it to earl and earl gave it right back to the professor -- right in the stomach
who
no egelhoffer was n't hurt badly
they took him to the county hospital where they 're afraid he 'll recover
that 's great work hildy
huh
oh will you stop worrying about the money
i 'll see you get it in fifteen minutes
it better be fifteen minutes because bruce is waiting downstairs in a taxicab and that meter 's clicking away to beat the band
hold on a minute
walter
d did you see -- -- that
yes
where is he
she jumped out of the window
i know
where is he i said
where do you think you 're going
let go o me
i 've got to get bruce out of jail
oh walter why did you have to do this to me
get bruce out of jail
how can you worry about a man who 's resting comfortably in a quiet police station while this is going on
hildy this is war
you ca n't desert now
oh get off that trapeze
there 's your story
smear it all over the front page -- earl williams caught by the morning post
and take all the credit -- i covered your story for you and i got myself in a fine mess doing it -- and now i 'm getting out
i know i told you that twice before today -- but this time i mean it
you drooling idiot
what do you mean you 're getting out
there are three hundred and sixty five days in the year one can get married -- but how many times have you got a murderer locked up in a desk
-- once in a lifetime
hildy you 've got the whole city by the seat of the pants
i know but --
you know
you 've got the brain of a pancake
that was n't just a story you covered -- it was a revolution
hildy
this is the greatest yarn in journalism since livingstone discovered stanley for the new york herald
wait a minute -- was n't it stanley who discovered livingstone
do n't get technical at a time like this
do you realize what you 've done
you 've taken a city that 's been graft ridden for forty years under the same old gang and with this yarn you 're kicking 'em out and giving us a chance to have the same kind of government that new york 's having under la guardia
we 'll make such monkeys out of these ward heelers next tuesday that nobody'll vote for them -- not even their wives
i 'd like to think
well think it then because it 's true
we 'll crucify that mob
we 're going to keep williams under cover till morning so the post can break the story exclusive
then we 'll let the governor in on the capture -- share the glory with him
i get it
you 've kicked over the whole city hall like an apple cart
you 've got the mayor and hartman backed against a wall
you 've put one administration out and another in
this is n't a newspaper story -- it 's a career
and you stand there belly aching about whether you catch an eight o'clock train or a nine o'clock train
still a doll faced mugg
that 's all you are
let me get at that typewriter and i 'll show you how a doll faced mugg can write
attagirl
why they 'll be naming streets after you -- hildy johnson street
there 'll be statues of you in the parks hildy
the radio'll be after you -- the movies
by tomorrow morning i 'll betcha there 's a hildy johnson cigar
i can see the billboards now
light up with hildy johnson
whoa -- wait a minute
we ca n't leave williams here
one of the other fellows'll --
we 're going to take him over to my private office
where 's our phone
that one -- how you gon na take him
they 'll see him
can i call the mayor a bird of prey -- or is that libelous
call him a love child if you want to
duffy
how about the time he had his house painted by the fire department
give him the works
hello duffy get set
we 've got the biggest story in the world
earl williams caught by the morning post -- exclusive
for pete 's sake hildy they 're waiting for the rest of that story
okay walter
hildy
all right walter
listen did you impress it on butch that i want him and his gang here right away
you did
every minute counts
all right
duffy 's getting old
where 's butch
well keep going
we want an extra out on the streets before it 's too late
where 's bruce
bruce
oh -- er -- he went out to get the tickets
what tickets
railroad tickets
is he coming back here
did n't you hear him
of course he 's coming back here
keep going will you
double crossing swine
you said it
but this'll teach him a lesson
he wo n't quit his paper without giving notice after this
tear into it will you
do n't sit there like a frozen robin
i 'm finished
finished
where is she
tell me
louie
do n't tell me -- was she killed
was she
did you notice
it 's fate hildy
what will be will be
what am i going to say to bruce
what 'll i tell him
if he really loves you you wo n't have to tell him anything
snap out of it
would you rather have had the old dame dragging the whole police force in here
i killed her
i 'm responsible
oh- h
what can i do now
how can i ever face him
oh i hope he never comes back
look at me hildy --
i 'm looking at you -- you murderer
if it was my own mother i 'd carry on
you know i would
for the paper
louie where 'd it happen
i 'm going out
hello -- hello
gimme western four five five seven
who
hello butch
where are you
mission hospital
gimme the receiving room
what are you doing there
have n't you even started
hello -- eddie
hildy johnson
was there an old lady brought in from an auto smashup
oh for -- h. sebastian -- butch
listen it 's a matter of life and death
listen
nobody
morningside three one two four
i ca n't hear
you got who
speak up
a what
you ca n't stop for a dame now
is this the community hospital
i do n't care if you 've been after her for six years
butch our whole lives are at stake
are you going to let a woman come between us after all we 've been through
hello max hildy johnson
was there an old lady --
butch
i 'd put my arm in fire for you -- up to here
now you ca n't double cross me
she does
all right -- put her on
i 'll talk to her
hello
oh hello madam
now listen you ten cent glamour girl you ca n't keep butch away from his duty
what 's that
you say that again and i 'll come over there and knock your eye out
hello
i 'll kill 'em
i 'll kill both of 'em
duffy
mousing around with some big blonde annie on my time
that 's co operation
duffy
shut up will you
you sure
nobody
duffy
duffy
well where is duffy
diabetes
i ought to know better than to hire anybody with a disease
louie
lafayette two one hundred
that dumb immigrant'll flop on me
i know it
can you imagine butch doing this to me -- at a time like this
ring that number will you
come here
see if we can move it
hello -- hello
is this the lying -- in hospital
did you have an auto accident in the last --
will you come here
oh i see
i beg your pardon
when i 'm surrounded with my back against the wall you 're not going to lay down on me are you --
yes
hildy you just ca n't leave me out on a limb now
it -- it would n't be cricket
i do n't care what you say
i 'm going to find bruce 's mother
oh h
i 'm going out and find her
no
yes
what are you afraid of hildy
i dare him to move that desk out of here
wait a minute
let go there
murder uh
hanging an innocent man to win an election
when did you deliver this first
who did you talk to
which ought to be about three hours more i 'd say
just until we can get out a special edition asking for your impeachment
and your arrest
you 'll each get about ten years i think
how was that for a tight squeeze
do n't tell me you were worried
worried
i was petrified
were n't you
uh uh
as long as we were in there together pitching -- they could n't lick us
well it 's been a lot of fun
in a way
i mean -- working together
just like the old days
the things we 've been through hildy
we 've certainly been in some swell jams
remember the time we broke into the d.a. 's office and copied fifi randell 's diary
yeah
what about the time we hid the missing heiress in the sauerkraut factory
six scoop interviews
yeah but that time we stole old lady haggerty 's stomach off the coroner 's physician
we proved she was poisoned though did n't we
we sure did but we had to go in hiding for a week
in the shoreland hotel
and our only chaperon was the poor old lady 's stomach
do n't remind me
that 's how we happened to --
sorry hildy
i did n't mean to be making love to another man 's fiancee
that 's all right walter
it 's as much my fault as yours
bruce is making the nine o'clock train
i told him you 'd be on it -- unless you want to write this story yourself
well if it 's my last story i 'd like it to be a good one
but -- i guess i ca n't walter
suit yourself kid
this is n't for me to decide
of course you could make a later train and still be in albany tomorrow morning
yeah
i suppose i could
but walter --
he 's going to have you the rest of his life hildy
ca n't you give me another hour
i do n't know what to do walter
flip a coin
all right
heads i go -- tails i stay to write the story
ready
well -- what is it
what 's the difference
i 'm going to write that story -- and you know it
hildy
do n't touch me
i 'm not doing it for you
then why are you doing it
because i 'm a newspaper woman heaven help me
that 's what he said the last time
do n't believe him judge
hildy from this time on no tricks no double crossing -- everything on the level
you 're not fooling anybody
how about bruce 's
walter you ca n't do that
sure i can
look at the policy i gave him
with this ring i thee we d and with all my worldly goods i thee endow and thereto i plight thee my troth
hildy darling
yes -- hildy darling
i 'm just a fool
that 's what i am
i know what it 's going to be like
it 'll be heaven
sure heaven
you 've probably thought up another coal mine to send me down in -- to get a new story for your paper
but hildy -- i can explain --
you -- you
louie take this lady over to polack mike 's and lock her up
see that she does n't take to anyone on the way
what 's that -- what 's that
are you referring to me madam
you know you did
come on sheriff
we 've got to get bail
i was in here -- and they had some kind of murderer in with them
they were hiding him
oh dear
oh dear
you grey haired old judas
let me out
let me out of here
you stay here
i 'll find out everything
western an thirty fourth
anything you want boss
beat it out and get hold of some guys
who do you want
anybody with hair on his chest
get 'em off the street -- anywhere
offer them anything -- only get them
we 've got to get this desk out of here
you know me
the shirt off my back
you got plenty of money
sure boss
i mean real money -- not counterfeit
i always have both
walter
i 'm busy duffy
well you 're not too busy to know that the governor has n't signed that reprieve
what
and that means earl williams dies tomorrow morning and makes a sucker out of us
you 're crazy
where 's mac
he 's on my phone
he just called me
they ca n't do that to me
do n't blame me
i 'm city editor in name only
you do all the hiring around here
yeah
well i do the firing too
remember that duffy and keep a civil tongue in your head
here 's that certified check walter
i drew out my wife 's savings and if this is n't back by 5:30 i 'm a ruined man
do n't worry duffy you 'll have it back by five
thanks duffy
stick around
hello hildy
what are you doing around here
i want to interview earl williams warden
how about a little service
no more interviews
besides a doctor 's coming over
say is n't this your twenty dollars
i think it is
i thought so
come on i 'm in a hurry
how much
four hundred and fifty dollars
is it a deal
it 's a deal
let me up
let 's see the money
first we talk
how did earl williams get that gun
the newspapers
sheriff they 're the scum of modern civilization
you said it
they 're always after me for interviews
me too
of course i sort of promised them i would give out a statement when i got through here
you do n't mind
well i do n't know if that 's ethical
you see all statements are supposed to come from me
we 'll have to satisfy them
what would you say to giving them a joint interview
i could give them some of the psychological aspects of the case and you could give them the legal aspects
a joint interview eh
that might be all right
we could have our pictures taken together doctor
yes shaking hands
i do n't take a very good picture though
it does n't matter
the publicity 's the main thing
yes i suppose so
it all helps
i do n't know --
come come sheriff lightning does n't strike in the same place twice
nothing 's going to happen
are you gentlemen all through with me
oh i 'm sorry
i forgot you were here
no mr. williams we still have some questions for you
sheriff will you kindly extinguish the lights
you know you are to be executed mr. williams
who do you feel is responsible for that
the system
but i 'm not afraid to die doctor
i 'm dying for what i believe
i see
you realize however that you committed a crime
in a legal sense yes
but not actually
actually i 'm innocent
i did n't do anything
now the sheriff will be mollie malloy in whose room you were
you will be earl williams
and i will be the policeman
follow me mr. williams
yes sir
so -- now i say to you earl williams you are under arrest
and you point your gun at me
well it was n't exactly that way --
point the gun at me
i call
what you got
three bullets
any good
beats king up
who locked the door
just a second mike --- mollie i got it
open up there will you
all right -- all right
hey
mollie drop down here
you 've fainted
kind of exclusive ai n't you
we got calls to make you know
run down and get some smelling salts will you
mollie malloy -- what happened to her
came up here -- had hysterics and passed out
i 've been trying to get her to come to
she looks as though she 's going to come to
give me a hand with her will you
okay
up you go mollie
a fine bunch of reporters
biggest story in two years and they 're too lazy to go after it
it 's easy for you to talk
you 're retired
we 're still working
trouble is when the red menace shows up the sheriff will still be crying wolf
what have you got hildy
well a guy can win when hildy ai n't around
who 's this guy she 's gon na marry
she says she 's gon na write fiction
well if she 's gon na write fiction there 's nothing like being a reporter
you guys wanna play some more poker
what 's the use
i ca n't win a pot
boy did you see her go
lioness rushes to defense of cub
no i tell you
nobody knows where he got it
the crime commission has offered a reward of ten thousand dollars for williams capture
call you back
so have we
what 's the dope sheriff
who engineered this getaway
say hildy if i know you you sound pretty anxious to get rid of us
are you trying to scoop us or something
something smells around here
if you ask me mollie gave her the story on how williams got that gun
did you smuggle that gun into williams mollie
come on pinky
give 'em a little third degree
make them talk and you got williams pinky
hold the phone
i 'll have it in a minute
i 'll call
three sixes
is that any good
goodbye yonson
so long hildy
what a chase
no luck on williams yet -- call you back
you ai n't gettin out o here
now where is he
we know what you 're up to
probably goin' out to get williams
how 's everything gus
i ca n't complain
oh i 'm sorry gus
my foot must have slipped
that 's all right
gus this --
good coffee is n't it
same way you did
through that gate
i gave strict orders that nobody was to interview williams without my permission
all right then i 'll just run the story that sheriff hartman is afraid to let reporters interview his prisoner
of course with election coming that might do you a lot of harm but just as you say
now wait a minute
i 'm not afraid of anything
what were you going to write about williams
oh nothing much
just that the state had proved he was sane -- and he admits it himself
if you do n't want me to run it --
oh that 'll be all right hildy
go ahead run it
and you can say i treated him well too
lo earl
how are you feeling
no thanks sheriff
i 'm leaving town tonight
you ought to stay over
you always wrote a good hanging story hildy
that 's awful kind of you sheriff
i 've got to get started on my interview
see you later
just a minute johnson
let go o me
what 's the idea
take your paws off me
hold her boys
let me go
fellows something 's happened to my mother in law
hang onto her
keep her in here
i do n't know anything i tell you
there 's been an accident
johnson there 's something very peculiar going on
you can send somebody with me if you do n't believe me
i was n't born yesterday
now the boys tell me you and this mollie malloy --
nobody 's trying to put anything over on you
i 'm getting out of here and you ca n't stop me
he went over to the hospital to call on professor egelhoffer
what
with a bag of marshmallows
he 's harmless
do n't take any chances
shoot through the desk
he ca n't hurt anybody
you 've got his gun
that 's murder
all right
carl
frank
one of you get on each side of the desk
take hold of the cover
if the mayor wants me he knows where i am
this tear bomb went off unexpectedly in the hands of sheriff hartman 's bombing squad
what went off
four of mr. hartman 's deputy sheriffs were rushed to the hospital --
a fine fair weather friend you are
the names are merwyn d. mayor who is the mayor 's brother in law --
after all i 've done for you --
howard shenken the sheriff 's uncle on his mother 's side --
where is he
where he used to live
you can catch the riot squad -- it 's just going out
i 'm sheriff hartman
you want me
you 're certainly a hard fellow to find sheriff
for who
earl williams
the reprieve
read it
insane he says
he knows very well that williams ai n't insane
yeah
but i --
pete i want to talk to you
i ai n't got time fred honest
i 'll see you after
did you actually give williams that gun
the professor asked me for it -- i thought it was for something scientific
pete i 've got a mighty unpleasant task to perf --
now listen fred
just give me a few hours before you make any decisions
i 'll get results
i 'm doing everything humanly possible
i 've just sworn in four hundred deputies
four hundred
do you want to bankrupt this administration
i 'm getting them for twelve dollars a night
twelve dollars
-- for those rheumatic uncles of yours
out shooting everybody they see for the fun of it
if you 're talking about my brother- in law he 's worked for the city fifteen years
pete you 're through
what do you mean -- through
i mean i 'm scratching your name off the ticket tuesday and running czernecki in your place
it 's nothing personal
and pete -- it 's the only way out
it 's a sacrifice we all ought to be glad to make
fred
now pete
please do n't appeal to my sentimental side
fred i do n't know what to say
a thing like this almost destroys a man 's faith in human nature
i wish you would n't talk like that pete
our families fred
i 've always looked on bessie as my own sister
if there was any way out
that gives you an idea of what i 'm up against
we 're up against a lot more than that with that nutty slogan you invented reform the reds with a rope
williams ai n't a red and you know it
well there 's a lot of communistic sympathizers around --
i know it
but they 've got nothing to do with this case
do you realize there are two hundred thousand votes at stake and unless we hang earl williams we 're going to lose 'em
but we 're going to hang him fred
he ca n't get away
the governor gave me his word of honor he would n't interfere
two days ago
and you fell for it pete
it frightens me what i 'd like to do to you
who else knows about this
pure politics
an attempt to ruin us
dementia praecox oh h h
we got to think fast before those lying reporters get hold of this
what 'll we tell 'em
tell 'em the party is through in this state on account of you
ah fred -- hello
this is hartman --
and you can tell 'em as an afterthought that i want your resignation now
sssh
wait fred
what
where
where
holy moses
what is it
they got him
wait a minute -- hold the wire
they got earl williams surrounded -- the riot squad has -- in his house
tell 'em to hold the wire
i did
hold the wire
cover up that transmitter
we 'll fix that too
just -- one -- second
all right
tell 'em to shoot to kill
what
shoot to kill i said
i do n't know fred
there 's that reprieve if they ever find out
nobody reprieved that policeman he murdered
now do as i tell you
hello olsen
listen
shoot to kill
that 's the orders pass the word along
no
we do nt want him
and listen olsen five- hundred bucks for the guy that does the job
yes i 'll be right out there
well i hope that 's the right thing to do
now take that guilty look off your face pete -- and stop trembling like a horse
if we did n't have election tuesday i 'd have this on my conscience
fine work pete
you certainly delivered the goods
i 'm proud of you
look kind o natural do n't they fred
a sight for sore eyes
aiding an escaped criminal
and a little charge of kidnapping i 'm looking into
but that 's the jail
there must be somebody there
well
looks like about ten years apiece for you birds
who is this man
throw him out frank
you drunken idiot
arrest him
the idea of coming here with a cock and- bull story like that
it 's a frame up
some imposter
that 's a lie
i never saw him before
take those handcuffs off our friends pete
that was n't at all necessary
i was just going to
walter i ca n't tell you how badly i feel about this
there was no excuse for hartwell to fly off the handle
i was only doing my duty
nothing personal in it
i hope you 're pretty nearly through with me doctor i 'm getting a little fatigued
yeah you do n't want to tire him out doctor
got you williams
go on -- shoot me
let him out of here lieutenant
but hildy i ca n't
he 's accused of stealing a watch
and they found the watch on him
and who accused him
diamond louis
one of the worst crooks in town
why do n't you arrest louis instead of innocent people that he frames
now hildy --
do n't hildy me
are you going to let him out
i ca n't
all right
you ca n't
but tomorrow the post will run the story of that roulette game on 43rd street that your brother in law runs
and we 'll print that you get five hundred a month for forgetting about it
now hildy do n't be hasty
i ca n't let him out
you can let him out on bail ca n't you
five hundred dollars
you 'll take fifty and like it
well all right
but i 'm liable to get into a jam
oh i ai n't doing that any more
i 'm retired
i 'm one of you fellas now -- a newspaper man
editorials
wait a minute walter
you ca n't do that
my name is louis peluso
where 's the old lady
i 'm telling you
we run smack into a police patrol
you know what i mean
we broke it in half
oh h h
was she hurt
i 'm telling you
can you imagine bumping into a load of cops
they come rollin out like oranges
what did you do with her
search me
when i come to i was running down thirty fifth street
-- you were with her
you were in the cab were n't you
was i
the driver got knocked cold
there goes another scrub lady
i 'll go right after it
well anyhow i wo n't be covering stuff like this any more
what 's the matter
getting yellow
it 's getting so a girl ca n't step out of the room without being discussed by a bunch of old ladies
hello post
mr. walter burns please
well hildy we were only saying that a swell reporter like you would n't give this up so easily
this is hildy johnson
oh i can give it up all right
without a single quiver
i 'm going to live like a human being -- not like you rats
oh is that you walter dear
oh i did n't mean dear
that was just habit i guess
oh be yourself walter
i 've got some news for you
yes i got the interview but i 've got some news that 's more important
hello mr. burns
yes she 's still here
i 'll take it
what 's the matter mr. burns -- do n't you understand english
-- why your language is shocking mr. burns -- positively shocking
i do n't mind because i was married to you and know what to expect but suppose central is listening in
oh did you hear that central
we ought to report him do n't you think
oh fooey on you
any news
yeah
i was never so tired in my life
you fight it cut
and up a dime
i do n't know why you boys are so good to me
your poker 's improved a lot hildy
lend me two bucks will you
nothing doing
i 'm playing for keeps
certified eh
who is it -- your milkman
but bruce do n't keep it in your wallet
well you see -- -- there 's an old newspaper superstition that the first big check you get you -- you put in the lining of your hat
that brings you good luck for ten years
say i 've been a reporter twenty years and never heard any hooey like that
where 'd you get it
i made it up just now and who 's asking you
i know it 's silly honey but do it for me wo n't you
yes right now
if walter burns calls hold the wire for me will you
i 'll be right back
okay hildy
well we ca n't get any official statement --
okay
forget it
what 's the matter with you boys
afraid it might rain
if you want to go i 'll cover this end
look out you --
what 's the use of fighting hildy
have you got my dough
oh sure
the boss sent me over with it
four hundred dollars was n't it
four hundred and fifty and i 'll cut your throat if you try any tricks
all right all right
you ca n't blame a guy for tryin can you
come on with that money
first you got to sign a receipt
where 's the money
keep your shirt on
i got it -- right here
one hundred -- two hundred -- three hundred -- four hundred -- and fifty
now sign
here
thanks
so long hildy
so long nothing
where 's bruce baldwin 's wallet
huh
none of that innocent stuff you double crossing hyena
you stuck bruce baldwin in jail this afternoon on a phony charge that he swiped your watch and you frisked his wallet
now give me that wallet or i 'll stick you in jail and it wo n't be on any phony charge either
it 'll be for life
now do n't get excited hildy
i do n't know what you 're talking about -- but is this mr. baldwin 's wallet
you know it is
i did n't frisk him
he must have dropped it in burns office
i did n't know whose it was
no -- and you do n't know that your cheap boss has had mr. baldwin arrested again -- do you
what -- already
why the dame left only a minute before i did
kings and sixes
that 's good
kings and sixes the pot affixes
poetry
i learned that at my grandma 's knee
any dope yet on how he got out
from all i can get the sheriff let him out so 's he could vote for him
hildy i thought you were gone --
well -- i was going but mollie fainted away and i thought i ought to do what i could
some hallowe'en goin' on outside
the whole police force standing on it 's ear
i do n't know what she 's talking about
i never said any such thing
i 'm quoting my son and he has never lied to me
mother
that man there
mother
oh i 'm so glad to see you
are you all right
tell me
i could n't plead insanity because you see i 'm just as sane as anybody else
you did n't mean to kill that policeman
of course not
i could n't kill anybody -- it 's against everything i 've ever stood for
they know it was an accident
they 're not hanging me for that -- they 're hanging me for my beliefs
what are your beliefs earl
they 're very simple
i believe in the golden rule
i 'm not the first man to die for preaching it
but if they would only listen to it -- we could have a fine decent world instead of this mass of hate that makes man do such cruel things
how would you go about applying the golden rule earl
i 'd do away with the profit system and have production for use only
there 's enough food and clothing and shelter for everybody if we 'd use some sense
production for use only
well maybe that 's the answer
it 's the only answer
everything has a use and if we let it be used for its purpose we could solve all our problems
food was meant to be eaten not stored away in restaurants while poor people starved clothing was meant to be worn not piled up in stores while people went naked
does n't that make sense
yes that makes a lot of sense earl
a gun
why -- to shoot of course
is that how you came to shoot the policeman
sure
you see i 'd never had a gun in my hand before and i did n't know what to do with it
well when i get stuck i know that there 's an answer for everything in production for use
so it came to me in a flash what 's a gun for
to shoot
so i shot
simple is n't it
very simple earl
there 's nothing crazy about that is there
no earl not at all
who sent you the flowers earl
miss mollie malloy
she 's a wonderful person
is n't that her picture
yes
is n't she beautiful
do n't forget about production for use
i wo n't earl
you 're not going to phone anybody where i am
put down that gun earl
you 're not going to shoot me earl
i 'm your friend remember
i 've got to write that story about your production for use
yes -- that 's right
production for use
earl you do n't want to hurt your friends do you
do n't move
earl you must never do that again
oh i 'm awful tired
i could n't go through another day like this
well maybe you think i could
do n't talk too loud
wakin me up in the middle of the night -- talkin to me about things they do n't understand
callin me a bolshevik
i 'm an anarchist
it 's got nothin' to do with bombs
it 's the philosophy that guarantees every man freedom
you see that do n't you
sure i do earl
quiet mollie quiet
do n't cry mollie there 's nothing to cry about
how 'd you get here earl
down the drainpipe
i did n't mean to shoot him
you believe me do n't you mollie
stop screaming mollie or we 're sunk
i 'm trying to think of something before those reporters get back
let 'em take me
it 's better that way
what good'll it do
we 'll get you out in ten minutes
come on mollie
this is no place for you
they 're not human
they 're newspaper men mollie
they ca n't help themselves
the lord made them that way
it was n't the lord
it was the devil
where are they gone
you know where they are
wait a minute mollie
they got him surrounded some place -- gon na shoot him like a dog
mollie they have n't got him
you got ta help me mollie
we 've got to do something
what do you mean
i 'm coming
keep dead quiet
do n't even breathe
i 'll be right here
i wo n't leave you
what 's the idea
never mind
just play dead
hey --
shut up you
are you all right now
yeah i 'm feelin fine
what do you want
i 'm a messenger at the state house
this is from the governor
what 's from the governor
the reprieve for earl williams
they were all standing around when he wrote it
it was after they got back from fishing
get the governor on the phone
you ca n't get him on the phone
he 's out duckshooting now
fishing
duckshooting
how do you like that
a guy does nothing more strenuous for forty years than play pinochle -- he gets elected governor and right away he thinks he 's tarzan
now listen
you never arrived here with this -- reprieve
get it
yes i did just now
do n't you remember
how much do you make a week
huh
how much do you make a week
what 's your salary
forty dollars
who
me
who do you think
this puts me in a peculiar hole
no it does n't
now remember you never delivered this
you got caught in the traffic or something
now get out of here and do n't let anybody see you
but how do i know
come in and see me in my office tomorrow
what 's your name
pinkus
all right mr. pinkus all you 've got to do is lay low and keep your mouth shut
here
go to this address
it 's a nice homey little place and they 'll take care of you for the night
just tell 'em fred sent you
and here 's fifty dollars on account
you forgot to tell me what a city sealer has to do
i 'll explain it tomorrow
is it hard
no
it 's easy -- it 's very easy
get out of here
you ca n't bribe me
they would n't take it
you 're insane
here 's the picture of my wife
a very fine looking women
she 's good enough for me
and if i was to go home and tell my wife --
i understand perfectly mr. pinkus and as long as i am mayor --
if you ask us no
if you ask the state alienists the answer is yes
it 's a simple story
earl williams works for the e.j. mcclosky manufacturing company as a bookkeeper for fourteen years
he starts in at twenty dollars a week and gradually works his way up to twenty two fifty
a year ago the mcclosky company goes out of business and williams loses his job
take it away fred wilson
well well -- miss mollie malloy
hello mollie
look out
look out where you 're aiming will you
there she is
say hildy
what 's your hurry
we want to see you
williams put up a desperate struggle but the police overpowered --
-- tried to shoot it out with the cops but his gun would n't work so --
well -- williams goes a little balmy and begins making speeches on a plan he 's got to save the world
only he makes his speeches usually on a very busy street and neglects to get a license for it
well the cops let him alone as much as they can because he 's harmless and they 're kinda sorry for him
but one day he decides to hold a meeting right in the middle of a veteran 's parade and the cops chase him
he gets scared and goes into hiding
come in dave schwartz
his honor the mayor now comes out with a statement that earl williams is a dangerous character in the employ of two or three foreign governments and the police are going to get him dead or alive
somebody sends out a tip that this guy is hiding in molly malloy 's joint
and this colored policeman daniels goes over to pick williams up
williams has read the papers thinks the cop is going to kill him and shoots first
that is all
baldwin -- his name is
i give that marriage six months
who
hildy johnson
she just stepped out
she 'll be back in a second
who
oh mr. baldwin
well if you 'll hang on a minute she ought to be right in
all right
baldwin
the blushing bridegroom -- himself
what 's he want
wants hildy -- and sounds very excited
the door was locked
she and mollie were talking
what 's that
henry chapman 's daughter
it was sheila
i remember her from last year
so it was
sheila
this boy will go far
that was a googly
i know
you 're a dark horse bowling googlies at your age
toss me up another
no you 're out grandpa
it 's my turn
want to know why they 're called faith hope grace and charity
why
your grandmother
she named them after virtues i lack
that 's marriage for you
this is going too far young man
but grandpa you said
i concede i was insistent but how the devil
give him the you know what
very well grandpa
you miserable little tripe hound
i 'm the one who should be fed up sacrificing my last sup of black market petrol to take you to school
i have to live in rosehill avenue as well
only till they get you into the local school
with mrs. evans
i hate her
you 'll be at home for the weekends
now shut up or walk
it 's true
you 're much more convincing when you 're making it up
grandpa if you think of something hard enough can you make it happen
apparently so
pauline 's mum got killed
no she did n't
yes she did did n't she
i know a secret
what 's that
the germans are dropping men on bomb sites
who told you that
my uncle 's in the war office
he said do n't go on the bomb sites
boys are going missing all the time
they 're not
you want to join our gang
i do n't mind
do you know any swear words
yes
say them
well go on then
you ca n't join if you ca n't answer
i only know one
that word is special
that word is only for something really important
now repeat after me
bugger off
bugger off
sod
sod
bloody
bloody
now put them together
bugger off you bloody sod
bugger off you bloody sod
ok
you 're in
they pulled them up from all the crossroads so when the germans land they 'll lose their way
wo n't they have maps
they 'll have to go to a shop to buy a map stupid
then they 'll give zemselves avay viz ze vay zay tork
he 's never going to come back
he 's gone off to be a soldier and mummy does n't even know
it does n't matter i can drive the car home
you would n't
would
you could n't
could
go and ask her if she wants to play
ask her yourself
you do it
you 're a girl
i suppose they 're still learning that 's why they keep moving about
it 's easy
i 've done it
who with
pauline
liar
mummy keep still and daddy moves on top of her
that 's what they do when they know how
i did see them
i did
he 's the worst liar
you 're the biggest fibber
it 's dinner time
it really is
cross my heart
the next one is ours
either it hits us or it goes past us
... and four and five
please god
not on us
drop it on mrs. evans
she 's a cow
... and six
ca n't we just see the end
they 've got the real thing outside
it 's not the same
mind that shrapnel dawn thrusts a brass regimental hat badge in bill 's face
i 'm starting my own collection
it 's canadian
where 'd you get it
well i 'm not having any
even if it 's not poisoned
i do n't think it 's right
it 's not patriotic
you do n't like jam
you hate jam
you never eat jam
that 's not the point
you did that for me and on the last day of your holidays
well for the baby really
thank you billy from the baby and me
now the googly looks like a leg break but it 's really an off break
got it
like this
it 's like telling fibs
that 's it
when you tell a lie you hope to get away with it
when someone else does you want to find them out
a good batsman will spot a googly
a good bowler will hide it
always remember that son
you said that last year dad
the land and the king are one my son
if he stutters we falter
he 's getting batter and so are we
what 's that
big berthas shelling france
twenty five mile range they have
wow
they send over a few every day to let them know we 're still here
each shell costs as much as a ford 8
who pays for them
we will you will for the rest of our lives
it was great for me how was it for you
a bit too quick
well
now we can do it slow
are those some kind of stockings you 're wearing
they might be
i mean no suspenders
they just kinda disappear up your ass
take it away
i know your husband 's been away a long time but
do n't be so cheeky bruce
boy that was some air raid
air raid
did n't you feel the house rock
you must have seen all those shell bursts
what is it
we 're not supposed to say but we 're being shipped out tomorrow
where
i do n't know
you do you do
you 're just not saying
i swear i do n't know
here 's your christmas present
you expect me to spend the rest of the war sitting at home staring at a ring
and you 'll meet some french girl who can speak your own language
no thank you
please yourself
and jim
what 's left of him
he 'll never see outside of the star and garter
root it out clive
the thought of it before it takes hold
weeds will grow mac
consider grace the kids
i love them like my own
and you
kiss me hardy
you 're a mug clive
we did our bit in the last lot
if king and country call mac you go as soon as i will
what did we know
we were seventeen
i heard the drum and fife yesterday mac marching past
made my hair stand on end
i thought i 've been asleep for twenty years
what kind of war is this mac
up there in cumberland we never see an air raid
the worst problem i have is getting a new typewriter ribbon
when i rode in against the turks i knew what it was about
did you
you thought you did
we 've been gypsed all our lives
look at your street
what about it
rosehill avenue
no roses
no hill
and it 's certainly not an avenue
why not
you need trees for an avenue
there was talk of planting some when we first came
propaganda
we 've been had
how 's your war mac
never done better
on the fiddle
like everyone else
except the servicemen
naturally
i do n't understand
is there any point to it
there is all right
this hitter fellow
we 've got to winkle him out
and get shot of some of our lot at the same time
you always were clive
steady the buffs
bugger the buffs
here 's to music
and absent friends
and absent bridegrooms
and the bride
no turks
we did n't know that
it was a suicide mission
machetes against artillery
volunteers only
they 'd gone
we all had to write a last letter home
and it was the last
has n't written a letter since
not even a birthday card
has sue got it right
what 's that
you joined up
oh that
i wish you could have told me yourself
oh grace it 's not for long
they say it 'll be over by christmas
and what 's that
jam
we do n't know anything about it
well it 's off ration
we know that
how do we know they did n't plant it there
they know we 're mad on jam
they could poison half the country
well
it looks
foreign
jam is jam
it 's just jam
taste it
why do n't you taste it
you taste it
i 'm glad you did n't send them to your aunt
i 've had a letter from her
they 've moved house
where to
i 've found a bungalow to rent up the towpath clive
i never want to leave the river again
the children have had such a wonderful summer
fair enough
the river
i doubt if a few bombs would wake up dawn on a sunday morning
this phoney war get 's on my nerves
if we 're going to have a war i wish they 'd get it started
just ignore her mac
you know it
it must be an old one
ancient
have you finished your homework
after this dance
he always knows
half the time he 's bluffing
what would we do if a german came into the house
do n't be silly dawn
well why do you always bring the carving knife in here
tell me the truth
you had to get married did n't you
because of me
the ideas you get in your head
that 's why you never liked me
i 'm different from you
well everything 's different now so it does n't matter
so there
i wo n't have this vulgar talk in my house
it 's only a joke mummy
i 'm fifteen
i 'm still at school
i want to be a nun when i grow up
you better bring him home if you really love him
do n't kill love
you 'll regret it for the rest of your life
who said anything about love
what is it pet
he 's being posted
i was terrible to him
do n't leave it like that
go after him
swallow your pride
what did he say
he said i was right
i should n't wait for him
i was better to make a clean break
i think it 's very sensible in the circumstances
now he 's gone and made me fall in love with him which i never wanted to do
i told him that
i do n't believe this is happening to me
it 's not
it 's happening to me
it looks a bit fishy to me
could we salt them or smoke them do you think
now take deep breaths and push
why
it 's coming on its own
it does n't hurt
is it peace in out time
no mother
it 's war
war
or what
did they say how long it would take to get new ration books grace
up to six weeks i think
how are we going to cope
i ca n't do it
what 's the point
it 's just the wrench grace
it 's for their sake
please yourself
let them go if they want
grace
it seems to have survived
play something grace
mac that was wonderful
i have n't been to a concert since
... since i used to take you to the proms
that 's right
not since then not since i got married
remember this beach mac
all those summers
out two families together
happy days
when you 're bigger bill i 'll teach you the googly
mac did you ever find out who molly went off with
a polish pilot
it 's like one of those jokes on the wireless
she said i know you love me mac but you 've never loved me enough
not loving enough
that is a terrible thing to do to someone
i suppose i did it to clive
always held something back
it 's all better left unsaid grace
you were never apart you and clive
he kept asking and asking
and i waited and waited for you to say something
and you never did
clive had a job
i did n't
i could n't
to mary mcdonald thelma richardson bobo hinds lily sanderson
little sarah whats it now there was a spirit
and marjorie anderson
father that 's enough now
and
and
henry chapman 's girl was it thelma
no i can see those cornflower eyes
i've lost your name my sweetness
what did i do to deserve this
you married that fool clive that 's what
never mind you can stay with us
how long
what can you do with four daughters i asked myself a string quartet was all i could come up with
they hated me for making them learn
and now we 're glad you did
it 's not fair on them
it 's selfish to keep them with you
my aunt in australia has offered
it 's so far way
i could n't bear it
kids do n't care
you 're thinking of yourself
i did n't mean it like that grace
why does it always come out wrong
i know you mean well
god how i hate all this scrimping and squalor
i do n't mind it
it was harder before the war
trying to keep up appearances
now it 's patriotic to be poor
i do n't know how you cope grace
three kids army pay
on your own
you know something molly
i like it on my own
i never got used to sharing a bed not really
i 'm so glad you could come
here we are all together again
happy as can be
in the old groove
whoa thanks for stopping
i been standing out there in that toad strangling rain for like a hundred million years
really that 's a long time
yeah most people just whiz on by like i was invisible or something
or else they 're creeps who wanna jam their slimy hands down my pants and twiddle my naughty naughty
yikes
yeah icky
this one guy stops and i look in and he 's got his thing out waving it around like a drunk monkey
yeah i know where that is it 's right by my house
it 's dr. satan 's tree
i can show ya
really wow so it 's really a real thing
yeah it 's a tree
i used to play there all the time
but you ca n't find it without me
outsider ca n't find no deadwood
deadwood is that what it 's called
cool will you show us
maybe maybe maybe
hey you know what word i hate
what
cone
huh
what cone
any cone yeah
i hate that word
sounds ugly i do n't like crumple either
i always hate saying the word cheese every time you get your picture taken
smile say cheese
i know i hate swiss cheese the holes make me nervous
oh i know
i 'll show you where it 's at sweetie
are n't you just so cute all bundled up like a cinnamon roll of christmas love
cool
the lions were totally covered in this guy 's blood
i think they ate his face off tore open his rib cage pulled his legs off
it was a wild scene
things like that get a lot bloodier than ya think
i agree
yeah it wo n't take long and besides you sassy poodle girls will slow us down
please do n't kill us please do n't kill us
please do n't kill us please do n't kill us
tiny 's home
what about r.j.
oh he was already gone before i seen him
but tiny saw him and said he said he was going out to the yard to get a new wheel
come on ma
this bitch 's got it coming
no i told you
drink up it 's party time
enjoy your last night
where 's otis
oh he 's coming he got something real special this year
who 's your daddy
who 's your daddy
take his gag out it 's more fun with the screaming
yeah i like the screaming too
it 's so much more exciting
aw i was going home to my mamma 's house
yeah i was out doing this thing
where 's that
couple more miles up this road
what about the tree
oh yeah the tree
which way
go straight up about another mile
til we hit cherrypicker road and turn right
it ai n't far from there
i guess i 'll try to back it out on the rim
at least to the main road
if you keep going straight you can get back on the interstate
it 's easier
how much further
almost there
are you in a hurry or something
well yeah kind of
the door 's locked
i 'll got ta go around
wait here
ok
christ you scared the shit out of me
aw you ai n't seen nothing yet
is your brother ready to go
oh
yeah he already left
we 'll wait inside come on
he left
yeah come on
so you live here alone
i mean with just your brother
no
there 's a bunch a us round somewhere
i think mamma 's sleepin
she sleeps a lot now
do you want marshmallows
um yeah sure i guess
you sure do a lot of guessing
thank you
you 're welcome
hey um
what kind of animal is that
a dead one
mmmmm this is tasty
ai n't the only thing tasty in this house
i wonder what time it is
seems kind of late
do n't worry sugar
it ai n't past my bedtime
are you flirting with me
what
no i 'm was worried that
i was just wondering what 's taking so long
oh
maybe r.j. got into a crash and killed everbody
that 's not something to joke about
ok sorry
maybe the great pumpkin ate 'em up
hey great they 're back
whoopie fucking doo
no
he 's one of god 's creatures he ca n't help it if he 's dumb
i 'm just crazy about animals
the animals have got nothing to do with it
what the hell are you laughing about
i just pictured the tire sitting in a chair watching tv
oh wonderful
fucking psycho
he walks duh
fucking great
take that you fucking slut
fucking redneck whore
you should n't a done that
why
you gon na do something about it
yeah i 'll do something
you all having a halloween party tonight
now what makes you think that
you all sure are buying a lot of holy water for two people
yeah well we like to get fucked up and do fucked up shit you know what i mean
yeah yeah
i like to fuck shit up
i 'll bet you do
how much we owe ya
goober
actually it 's g. ober
gerry ober but the guys drew in the other o fucking assholes
great story goober how much
ummmm
two hundred and eighty five dollars
keep the change and get yourself a new name
holy crap thanks
come on bro
let 's go
hey wait take this
what 's this
a missing girl
i use'ta go to school with her she just up and disappeared some day
real weird
how long have you been running this place
how long is a piece of string
too god damn long that 's how long
hold on i 've heard this before
but i ca n't remember the end
so the guy goes to hell and the devil says do you smoke
the guy say yeah
the devil say great cause tuesday is cigar night sweetest cuban cigars you ever had
shit we really need to find some gas
then the devil asks do you drink
guy says yeah
devil say wonderful wednesday is free drinks night best booze you ever had
all made from the finest stuff
yeah
then the devil says are you gay
guy says fuck no
devil says well then i guess you 're gon na hate thursdays
oh yeah i remember now
yeah no shit i just told ya
hey you think this place called alien ed 's ufo welcoming center is still around
it says where the fact is separated from the fantasy
i dunno
we 'll ask around as we get closer
man i really do n't want to run out of gas out here in the middle of petticoat junction man
do n't panic yourself way too much caffeine guy
i see a sign
captain spaulding 's museum of madmen and monsters
cool
also
fried chicken and
gasoline
next exit
perfect
i hope this place is cool
we could use something interesting to liven up chapter 12
i 'll pump the gas
go inside and see if it 's worth thinking about
ok boss
holy crap
you got ta see this place
it 's awesome
how awesome
really fucking awesome
wake up the chicks and bust out the camera awesome
hell yeah
keep straight on this road here
how much further
i 'm not exactly sure
it looks close
did we pass an abandoned school bus yet
i do n't know
come on we need something like this
it could be the real deal
it 's too far out of the way to come back to
what 's that
it 's a hitchhiker
way out here
she looks like she stinks
cat fight cat fight
that reminds me of a film i saw once of a guy who got out of his car at lion country safari to take a picture of a lion cub and got eaten by the lions
oh yeah i heard about that
i always thought it was bullshit
no
yeah they ripped him to pieces while his family watched from the car
the wife is screaming the kids are crying
some dude in another car filmed the whole thing
i hope you fixed the spare like i asked ya
yeah i fixed it
well i ai n't
um i ca n't remember
i think i took it out to fit the bags and forgot to put it back
jesus christ jerry
well technically i did what ya said
you 're a real fucking piece of work
tire 's fucking gone crap on us man
there 's no saving it now
and the spare is safely sitting in jerry 's garage
do n't forget the flashlight it 's pretty dark out there
thanks
no problem
oh do n't worry she did n't get offended by what i said
you two got to lighten up
right bill
whatever at this point all i care about is food
i 'm starving and i got a fucking killer headache
hey i asked you if you wanted some chicken
did n't look like chicken to me more like fried pussy cat
tasted pretty good
i ca n't believe what i 'm seeing
i know this is fucking nuts
almost there
jesus you think she was really gon na cut you
i like sleep
here he comes
honk at him
scare him
he wo n't move
what 's he so excited about
yeah showtime for what
just grin and bear it
that food
ugh i feel like i 'm gon na puke
shit i 'm all for being a sport but this is ridiculous
man it 's already ten thirty
yeah i 'd say at this point all we can do is just wait it out
there 's nothing else
i suppose
i mean they 're obviously all bonkers but i guess they 're harmless
do n't look back just get in the car
lock the fucking doors
we 'll need pictures of the inside too
alright alright
i know
i wanted to be the photographer
well do n't even think about playing the good samaritan there 's way too many psychos wandering loose these days
it 's a girl
should we stop
we ca n't leave her out here in the rain
maybe we can just drop her at the next rest area
she looks like a freak
go around him
there 's not enough room
then run him over he 'll move
hey he moved
let 's get going before that thing tries to eat the car or something
well i got some bad news and some bad news
what
fine
i 'll go straight
what
fine
i 'll go straight
forget it
i 'll just go
screw that no way i ai n't letting you go by yourself
do n't worry i 'll be quick
just stay here no sense everybody getting drenched
i hope to christ she does n't expect us to wear these things
whatever it is just do it
the more we play along the faster we 'll get the hell out of here
check this out
well ya ca n't complain i never take you anyplace
this is starting to make me real uncomfortable
just sit back and enjoy the show
officers officers what can i do for you today
i ai n't fried up the birds yet
if that 's what you 're ring a ding dinging about
what i need are some answers
well i 'll try but i do n't know nothing 'bout nobody
i 'm a guy who likes to mind his own business if ya get what i 'm saying
you seen this girl
say
within the last 24 hours
come on get with the facts
hmmmmmmmmm
what 'd you see who was she with where were they going
aw she was with some nosey smartass high rise kids
they were poking around
asking stupid questions
and
and i gave 'em directions out there up by the old farm row
i figured what 's the harm
stupid kids probably going out to piss up a rope and got themselves turned around backasswards and got lost as shit
is that all
think real hard
yeah they were n't here but a few minutes did n't really have time to get as up close and personal as i do with most of the assholes that wander through here
how 's about you give me those same directions
yeah yeah sure
you do n't have to get all true grit all over my ass
i 'll give'm to ya
you can knock yourself silly for all i care
enough talk write
i
i got back a stack today
some nice shots
see a good topless june wilkinson
unfortunately she personalized it
to stucky love june
hmmmmm
shit this ai n't worth nothing now that my name gotten all over it
i was a fixin on trading it to jackie cobb
the retard over at molly 's fruit stand
yeah he 's all hot on her after he found some of his dad 's old nudie books hidden in the basement
he keeps 'em taped inside his school workbook
fascinating
that kid is one horny retard
christ ai n't they all
all them retards wanna do is fuck and eat
well yeah
i think that if you knew him
i mean if you 'd understand his urges shit the guy 's like forty or something
worse than a fucking rabid baboon
yeah i guess you know next to wacking his weasel his other favorite thing is twisting sharpened pencils in the corner of his eyes
what
yeah does n't hurt himself just spins it around next to his eyeball
i 'm sure that ai n't the only place he 's sticking those pencils
naw he do n't do anything else with 'em but he did get caught once with a planet of the apes doll hanging out his asshole
goddamn
had to take him to the hospital
kid had dr. zaius stuck half way up his butt could n't get it out
i always loved that mute broad that chuck heston was shacking up with
nova yeah she looked pretty sweet
yeah now there 's the perfect woman
can i get some stamps off ya
did you fix the toilet yet
ya hear me
you bust that crapper and i 'll beat your ass
i hear ya
fuck your grandmother
yeah i remember mr. alacard the shop teacher use'ta call you little dick wick
hey was n't there a song we made up to go with that
huh
oh hi
you really do n't have a phone
no none
i had one once back in 57 maybe
i do n't know
really ai n't nobody we wanna be jaw flapping at around here no more
tiny ai n't got no car he ai n't even got a bicycle
how 's he get around out here
you sure you do n't need any help in there
no dear i 'm fine
now what kind of host would i be if i put my guests to this kind of work
you 'll have to forgive tiny he ca n't hear so much
oh
yeah my poor baby
it 's his daddy 's fault
i mean earl was a good man
i mean he never hit me or nothing but one day he just got up and went pure devil on us all
what happened
oh i 'm sorry it 's none of my business
he tried to burn the house down said it was possessed by the spirits
tiny was sleeping in the basement where the fire started
i do n't think earl ever meant to harm us
but tiny was badly burnt his ears were destroyed and most of his skin
huh
grab mary and come inside
great you 're back
let 's go
we already paid for the tickets
tickets for what
this is n't everything
get ready for this
there 's a museum of murder and mayhem
i do n't want to see that
aw come on
it will be fun
oh yeah murder museum
sounds fun
ugh what 's that smell
fried chicken
anybody want some
hey maybe she knows where this is
that seems likely
hey nice outfit billy bob
thanks for coming to get us
little brother almost scared us to death
dude your chick 's a little high strung
thank you
yes thank you
thank you very much
really now is not the time to make waves
hey i 'm just waiting for cousin itt to show up
shhhhhh
what are you laughing at
i do n't know i think he 's funny
this is n't funny it 's twisted
you got ta be kidding me
this chick is wasted
shhhhhh
we 've got get out of here we got get out of here
think think
try to open the lid try to kick a hole in the wood
i ca n't
i ca n't move my arms
i hurt so much
i know but we can make it out of here
we can do it
that was good babe just keep doing that
that 's not me
i did n't
i 'm not doing that
someone is out there
help we 're in here
help help us
hello
hey denise
what what 's wrong did you break down
no nothing like that
yeah we 're gon na be a little late
we stopped for gas at this place called capt
spaulding 's outside of ruggsville and it turned into a whole thing so we 're kind of behind schedule
oh yeah yeah i 've driven by that place before
i seem to remember a crabby old bastard in a crummy clown suit running the place
yeah well he 's still here
i think him and jerry are fast becoming buddies you know jerry
yeah he 's got ta see everything
yeah i know
thinks there 's some unsolved mystery around every corner
well do n't take too long the kids are already knocking down the door demanding their sugar fix
i know i know i forgot to mention that halloween falls on a school night so they 're trick or treating tonight
i got the joint decked out this year built a graveyard in the front yard like when you were a kid
hopefully i can move things along here and make up the lost time by speeding all the way home
yes dad i 'm kidding
well just promise me you 'll be careful
alright alright see ya soon
good bye
it will be nice to have a few days off to regenerate
this trip is fun but it 's starting to get brutal
yeah i hit burn out mode back at that old stripper lady 's place
watching her dance around with those ratty looking animals was ridiculous
i know that was some crazy shit
i never in a million years would have believed it if i had n't seen it
a decent meal every once in a while would n't hurt either this road food is crap
if i never eat at another waffle house again i can die a happy girl
scattered smothered and covered
exactly
well i guess a couple more photos wo n't kill me
geez he never gets tired does he
never
i swear to god he never sleeps he goes to bed after me wakes up before me
he 's always working on 10
maybe he 's a cyborg
let 's just skip it
it is probably nothing anyway
aw christ jerry
we ca n't see anything now it 's too dark
let 's forget it
stick her in the front if you want to pick her up so bad
she 's soaked
she looks like she stinks
do n't even say it
you got to be fucking joking
god damn it i knew this witch hunt was fucking bullshit
i think i 'm going fucking crazy
i ca n't believe
she said we look like pussy lickers or some shit like that
yeah she said we looked queer
how long has it been
i do n't know
about half an hour
jesus christ
i think i 'm gon na have a fucking heart attack
excuse me may i please use your phone
bill why do n't you ask her
she 's your special friend
a couple hours
ca n't tiny drive us to a phone
do n't be such a fucking smart ass
yeah it 's really your fault that we 're stuck in this shithole in the first place
what 'd we here georgie
a vehicle registered to a william s. hudley
holy jesus somebody had themselves a field day beating the shit outta this thing
yeah no mercy here
recover any bodies
not yet
shit i wonder what these kids did to bring this much hell down on 'em
just in the wrong place at the wrong time
that 's the understatement of the year
yep i suppose it is
god damn
you find something georgie
yep i found something
what 'd ya got there
keys
well christ boy do n't stand there like a prize dog dick with his butthole caught up a tree
huh
open up the trunk
yes sir
hey maybe the guy with the tow truck could drive us to a phone
his name is rufus rufus jr. but we all call him r.j.
oh right
what do they call you sweety
um i 'm jerry
that 's bill
denise and mary
great
i thought i felt a certain attraction between mary and tiny soon as he walked in
maybe
he 's a real lady killer
did n't ya think mary
i 've been meaning to ask you mrs
ummmm
firefly
firefly
mmmmm odd name
mrs. firefly do you know anything about the legend of dr. satan
for the show
it 's halloween eve and time for our show
oh you mean on tv
no no no it 's so much more special than that
you 'll see you 'll be the first to ever see
i think this is something you 'll really love
great
bye sweety we could of been great together
please let us go we wo n't tell anybody
aw honey you know i ca n't do that
i 'm gon na go ask him
aw come on jerry
we 've gotten all we 're gon na get out of this place and its starting to rain
shit it is only sprinkling and it 's worth the trouble
hold on for two seconds
we hit the jackpot
let 's roll good buddy
we got ourselves a convoy
huh
just back up
i think we should go straight
i mean we know for a fact there ai n't nothing back that way right
i 'll go
it 's my fault
you said it not me
ok lassies i think it 's time you get to gripping reality
enough with the stupid voices
this is way too fucked up for words
i know the words
fucking psycho fucking bullshit that 's the words
i 'm with denise ca n't we just walk to someplace this is getting fucking stupid
negative
shit we are so deep in the sticks we could walk for hours and find zero
oh i get it
i guess you think you 're too good for the simple pleasures of halloween
no just a little too old
oh really well i hope something changes your mind some day
i know you 're my guests and welcome but i 'd please advise you to keep from cussing while in my house thank you
sorry
well even though i know it seems childish to you all
tonight is halloween eve and it special to us so you are all invited to stay for dinner
i suggest you kids leave now
do n't worry i 'm gone
why
why are you doing this
doing what
messy up your day
well fuck lady there are some bigger issues at hand
than your fucking have a nice fucking day bumper sticker shit
where 's bill
well bill
he 's a good guy he 's been great help to me
a real blessing
i could n't have asked for a better specimen
i mean you do n't know what a dry spell i 've had total block
total block
but bill he 's ok
where is he
let 's go see
what are you doing
no stop
please please
you my dear worm feeder are about to become immortalized
well hello officer
excuse me i 'm sorry for disturbing you this fine afternoon
aw you ai n't disturbing me but it kind of looks like rain do n't ya think
my name is lt
wydell i 'd like to ask you a few questions
questions
well heck i 'll tell you anything you want to know
i appreciate your cooperation
i 'm looking for a missing girl
this girl here denise willis
have you seen her
well i
mmmmm
no i ai n't seen her sorry
please could i please come in and talk to you for a minute
maybe you could take a better look at the picture
might stir up something
i um
no i do n't think so
please just a minute
oh alright
i guess i can trust you
being a man of the law and all
thank you
oh you are very welcome
lord knows how i love a man in uniform
think
do any of these kids look familiar in any way
no i ca n't say that i ever seen 'em before
he looks familiar is he on tv
grampa
watch the language
i ai n't sure that you really need to know
it 's better you go home still dreaming about your kitty cats and puppy dogs
otis
otis
come quick there 's cops outside
what
god damn how many
i do n't know
i only saw one
i 'm sure there 's more than that
fucking pigs always travel in packs
here take this
what should i do
go down stairs and play nice
i 'm a gon na go round back and handle things like i always fucking do
that 's true otis
not that we 're having a bad time but
well go get her
hey
george willis
any leads
local girl karen murphy been missing for a couple months figured for a runaway
fit the profile
no not really
good kid never been in any trouble
christ four kids could n't just disappear
no they could n't somebody had to see something
my denise is a smart girl she would n't do anything stupid and her boyfriend he always seemed like a good kid
turn up this road
where we headed
shit do n't these packrat hillbillies throw anything away
shhhh
you hear that
yeah i hear it
where 's it coming from
over here inside the smokehouse
we got ta break it open
i ai n't got a warrant
fuck go to the car
call for backup
tell 'em officer down
right
mr. willis
yes sir
i 'm wydell
this is naish
well we were on our way out to run a check on a couple farmhouses out on the edge of town
closest thing we got to a lead at this point
that 's it
well all we know is the kids were headed out to a spot the locals call deadwood to play nancy drew with some local legend about this character everybody calls dr. satan
dr. satan
what about the body you found
oh yeah you know about that
hmmm that 's a strange one
her part in this i ca n't figure
but i will
christ you know it 's crazy
i lived through so many other people 's nightmares you know
always cool and calm but
but i never thought i 'd be the one needing help ya know
i 'm sure there 's a logical explanation
i pray to god there is
well let 's go see if the nut that runs this place can help us
right
boss the way i see it is these kids probally stop off somewhere bought a bunch of booze and are off getting shitfaced
i hope you 're right but my guts are telling me different
your spidey senses tingling
yeah
huh what the hell are you talking about
you know your hyper sensitive spidey senses
like spider man
you know like in the comics
how old do you think i am
i know who the fuck spider man is
get to your point
you know his senses start tingling
when he was approaching danger and shit
i always favored the hulk
hulk was dumb as shit
aw fuck
what
yeah it 's horseshit just some boogieman crap that the kids like to scare each other with
anyway there 's not much else out that way
so i figure maybe there 's a chance the kids broke down and found their way over to one of the farms
do n't worry we 'll find her
let 's hit the road sooner we get a move on sooner we 'll find her
i 'm gon na see if anybody 's home
you and mr. willis take a look around the grounds for any sign of anything
right
come on
wydell
excuse me for a second
over
we found one
and furthermore
tell him harold
uh
we must never act like apes son
for you see the ape is our closest biological relative -- specifically the pygmy chimp
a single chromosome separates us
but you know what truly separates us from the apes what makes us better than apes
that is the wrong fork young man
harold tell the boy
that is the wrong fork young man
harold
tell the boy again
no buts
go to your room now
and
and think about what you 've done
lila what are you doing in there
i need to get ready for my date
nothing
i 'll be out in a minute
i do n't know why you did n't tell me about this
it 's embarrassing okay
it 's not so bad
so it just keeps growing
yeah natalie
it 's hair
it grows
well do n't jump down my throat
i 'm just trying to help
how is that helping natalie
how exactly
look if you 're going to be like that
you should be appreciative that i 'm interested
why because i 'm a freak and you are beautiful and you are being nice enough to come down to my freak nonbeautiful level and act concerned about my repulsive troubles
you 're fucked up lila
why do n't you fucking try electrolysis or something
figure it out for chrissake
hello my little boy
hey ma
did you bring any clothes
i 'm freezing my ass off
oui
nathan 's silk suit just like you asked
great
god i 've wanted you forever
say my name
gabrielle
you remind me so much of nathan
like father like son
you remind me so much of nathan plus so much of my little mongrel doggie
woof
as much as i loved nathan i 'm not sorry she killed him if it means i can have you
is that a terrible thing to say my sweet
hush
no it is never terrible to be in love
nathan 's memory lives on in our sacred union
i 'm not sorry she killed him either
nathan was wonderful
he was erudite and sophisticated and charming
you are all that too
but you have something more
you have a bit of the animal in you
let 's go eat i 'm starved
french
oui
only three shocks
a chimp takes fifteen
this is going to be tres simple no gabrielle
oui doctor oui
good morning
we need a name for him do n't we
oui
you decide
today is your day
really
my day
well i had a sweet little mongrel puppie named puff when i was a girl
this one reminds me of my dog all shaggy
so cute
i loved my doggie very much monsieur
puff it is then
puff bronfman
is that okay
oui
perfect
good morning puff bronfman
i 'm dr. bronfman and this is my assistant gabrielle
we 're your mommy and daddy while you are here
oh hi gabrielle
hi
i just wanted to tell you that i very much enjoy working with you
now i 'm embarrassed that i say this
listen you 're the best assistant i 've ever had
gabrielle
i like it when you say my name
is that stupid
oh doctor
i did not know
i 'm sorry to disturb you
i just came for some papers i left
gabrielle
no i 'm sorry if i startled you
i came to think
god did i hang up on you
oui
perhaps i called at a bad time
i am sorry
no
i just got distracted
i 'm so sorry
is everything fine
oui
now you 've got me talking french
i was in my p.j
's when i remembered i left some papers i need to go over
see
i rushed right out of the house
i must look a mess
i 'm so embarrassed
i 'm in my p.j
's too
funny huh
coincidence yes
and how is our son
our
oh
he seems fine
i guess we woke him
the lights and all
i should turn them off
maybe i sing him a lullaby my mama sang to me when i was a little girl
when you were a little french girl
oui
that would be good
shall we close up then
maybe we should just sit for a while
it 's very peaceful
it 's nice yes
i 'm glad i ran into you both in our silly pajamas
it is two happy coincidences no
yes
happy happy
yet you look so sad
a great man like you should not be sad
i 'm fine
life is funny that 's all
i am sleepy
i should n't say this but you 're pretty gabrielle
it 's unprofessional i know
really
i always think myself so ugly
no not ugly but plain
a wallflower
really
no
not at all
you 're a very pretty girl
you should know that
you should be confident
thank you so much
merci
it 's very wonderful to hear a man say such a nice compliment
it 's true
i would n't lie
you are sweet
so soft
so smooth
i 'm sorry
it 's just
shh
what is wrong my darling
nothing my darling
all is right with the world
dr. bronfman 's line
yes
one moment please
lila
shit
hi honey
my little french
stop
get away
what is it
you have to choose nathan
it 's like sophie 's choice
only it is nathan 's choice
did you ever see that movie sophie 's choice
it is like that
only it is this
gabby you know i 'm trying to sort things out
no
it is now that you must decide
i love you doctor nathan
but i will not wait
i will not be your chippy
i will not be your little mademoiselle parlez vous side dish
my love
i want to have a sweet tiny baby inside my belly
from you
i love you so much gabrielle
but
but
there is a but nathan
but i do n't know how to leave lila
you were wonderful today darling
such authority with the ape man boy
it made me so hot for you
unnhh
the way you are taming him it sends chills down my girlish spine and
everywhere else too
urgh
take me darling
tame your little monkey of love
yeah
what
hi
it 's nathan
call you back
you bastard
what do you want
i just want to talk
we have nothing to say
you are a rotten bastard that 's what
please
just one minute of your time
why
you 've made your decision mister stinky american
now i hate you
no i do n't hate you i do n't even think about you
i 've got some things to tell you
like what
well i think it would be easier if i could talk to you in person
what for
well i think
you think too much
i need a man who does n't think so much but acts more than he thinks
is what i need
what
you heard me
you make me sick when you pretend to not understand what i am saying to you
go away from here
well look i 'm sorry to have bothered you
so we 've got seventeen new bookings for speaking engagements my wonderful men
terrific
we 're all going to be rich and famous
lila
that 's lila
a penny for your thoughts mon cheri
i do n't know
something 's missing
yes please somebody ask him what is wrong
i do n't know
i want our boy back
oui
that bitch
i worked so hard
we worked so hard you and i. he would 've made us famous
we still have you and i.
i know
and that 's great
but it would be great in a better way not a better way but a different way if i could find him and bring him back
where do we look for little lost puff
i have some thoughts
i think that hairy bitch is somewhere trying to turn him back into an ape
that is horrible
apes are dirty
no
you better believe they 're dirty
and smelly
and messy
and they do n't know their forks from their assholes
i 'm going alone
this could be dangerous
okay my sweet
good night
a little resistance would be nice damn it
please let me go with you
no
okay
my apologies madam
it 's okay puff
sha n't happen again
it sha n't happen again
i swear it
i 'm just getting my sea legs you know
it 's an animal urge puff
it 's nothing to be ashamed of
you what
i want to be the way i was before
good
i 'll show you how apey
nice night
talking is to be kept to a minimum
eventually when we are ready there will be none
language was invented so that people could lie to each other and to themselves
there is no other reason
you 'll thank me eventually puff
well you wo n't thank me because we wo n't be speaking but you 'll sort of thank me with a special look the look a dog gives you to let you know he loves you
what an enchanting picture you paint of our future together
he 's dead
we bury the body
we disappear into the woods
nobody knows
no
this is the end of the road
there 's a dead human being here
for all of his faults he was a human being and certainly a victim of his culture as much as anybody
forget him lila
we 'll disappear
we 'll never talk about it again
we 'll never talk again period
i love you
puff what happened to you is as much my fault as nathan 's
maybe more so because i knew it was wrong and i went along with it anyway
i 'm taking responsibility for the murder
i want you to go back to your old life
i wo n't let you do that
i shot the bastard
and i 'm glad
no
go back to the woods
this is a sacrifice i need to make
in my world we have something called penance
it 's another abstraction but i had the concept drummed into my head during my years in the convent
it does n't exist for you and it should n't
see i could never be free again anyway so i might as well be in jail
then i 'll live for both of us lila
i 'll be the most free truest animal in the whole forest
for both of us
that 's what i 'm counting on
but first i 'll live among them just long enough to testify before congress about the waywardness of humankind
okay
if you think it will help
progress
ouch
yeah
oh yes honey
getting to be smooth smooth smooth all over
smooth as a baby 's butt
i love it rose
i 'm getting to be a real girl
you still in the market for a real boy
always
ow
cause there 's this guy
my brother knows him
might be right up your alley
tell me
i could use someone up my alley
i do n't get that
is that sexual
shut up and tell me
handsome thirties psychologist
loves animals
ouch
must love animals rose
loves animals
loves you
what do you mean
somehow it came up that you were a friend of mine
mr. handsome animal- loving psychologist said he would love to meet you
holy shit
your brother did n't tell him about the nature of our relationship did he
my brother is discreet
wo n't he be able to tell
my brother says the guy 's a thirty- five year old virgin so maybe he wo n't know how women usually feel
plus he 's got bad eyesight almost legally blind which is helpful in this situation
plus he 's got an extremely small penis of which he is mortifyingly ashamed so chances are he 'll be so grateful for any non- judgmental attention that he 'll be yours forever
god he must be really close to your brother to tell him such personal stuff
yeah well my brother is his shrink
so
i really like him rose
he 's so
passionate about his work
my brother says he likes you too
really
yeah
says he likes you even more than he likes his own mother
and according to my brother nathan 's abormally close with his mother
my brother says things are going really well between you and nathan
i can not believe how in love i am with this man
yeah
he 's so cute
i even like his cute little penis
it 's like a little pig 's penis or something
rose we connect on every level
i 've finally found someone i can feel completely safe with
do n't throw that away
i had that once with a guy
but i threw it away for a cheap thrill
one night stand
no
i married a midget
marrying a midget was a cheap thrill
well he was n't really a midget
he was on the cusp of midgethood
that 's what made it cheap
had he been an actual midget there would 've been nothing cheap about it my dear
i did n't know you were into that sort of thing
let me tell you honey midgets are the best kept secret in male companionship
they 're portable
they 're controllable
they 're eager
and they 're exactly the right height for a little covert oral fun on the dance floor
i have a friend you might like to meet
oh
three foot one
be still my crotch
rose nathan 's no midget but he 's asked me to move in with him
yeah
my brother told me
and i think i 'm going to
stand on a stepladder sometimes
no maid service
for god 's sake ca n't you read the fucking do not disturb sign on the fucking doorknob
lila it 's rosie
go the fuck away rosie
please honey let me in
rose please go away
lila i want to help you
done
ready
uh tie them up rosie
if you will
with pleasure
i 'm going to miss you
oh rosie
and i 'm going to miss the lifestyle having you as a client has afforded me
shut up you
i like you so much with or without hair
but do n't spread that around
bad for business
i 'm really glad you two found each other
i 'll be in touch
no you wo n't
but it 's okay
you have stuff you got ta do
meditations on a banana slug was a delightful read
thank you so much
i love slugs
all slugs not just banana slugs
as do i.
they 're so even keel
they forge ahead with slow determination
they do n't get distracted or side tracked
they do n't care what they look like
they do n't care that people look at them and go ewww
a slug
they do n't seem to be especially ego driven this is true
you 've got to respect that
i have to say that i 'm not there yet
where
slugdom
sluggishness
whatever you 'd call it
i 'm not there yet
i still have many human characteristics
that 's not necessarily a bad thing
yes
i suppose not
but still
one would like to move along
to move beyond
i 'm not sure we can escape our natures
believe me i 've tried
i 'm not even so sure anymore that we should want to
i love that you said that
it makes me feel a bit lighter
i 've been rather heavy lately
thinking about my childhood
realizing how much a product i am of my upbringing
i 've been seeing someone
a therapist
you are a therapist right
no no
i 'm a psychologist but i do research
i 'm a behaviorist
i work with animals
mice at the moment
i hope you do n't perform any of those dreadful torture experiments nathan
heavens no
my work now is
right now i 'm teaching mice
well table manners to be candid
how 's it going
quite well really
it 's a lot of work
a lot of reinforcement mostly positive
right now i 've gotten two of my subjects to use napkins
tiny napkins of course
paper or cloth
i hope you do n't think me daft
it 's important work
it 's part of a larger sociological experiment
i 'm federally funded
what 's the larger experiment
it 's my thesis that if table manners can be taught to mice they can be taught to humans
going out on a limb are n't you nathan
the truth is most people do n't have table manners today
and when the foundations of civilized society crumble and disappear civilized society in its entirely follows closely at its heels
i 'm not sure
courtesy decorum manners are all sadly lacking from our daily intercourse
rudeness vulgarity meanness are the norm
we are animals after all
ergo if i can teach table manners to mice i can teach them to humans
if i can teach table manners to humans i can save the world
it looks wonderful
you look wonderful
i 'm on top of the world tonight lila
work is going splendidly and my personal life is
um mmm
oh nathan this salad is delish
my god
the fork
the fork
i 'm sorry
tell her harold
it 's just that
it 's nothing
it 's just that the outside fork is the salad fork
one goes from the outside in as the dinner progresses
oh i 'm sorry
i 'm sorry nathan
i never really learned those things
no biggie
actually mother and father you look very very old
you look terrible
nathan
what are you doing in there
i 'll be out in a minute
i 'm sorry about my parents
you did n't seem sorry when you were laughing at all your mother 's stupid tasteless cruel animal jokes
i was simply attempting to keep the evening light
you know that i feel similarly to you about nature
do you
of course
i simply love the
naturalness of it all
do you
oh do you darling
why certainly
oh darling
i 'm so relieved
let 's celebrate with a long hike in the woods tomorrow
that 's a great idea
it 'll be wonderful
i 'll show you my old stomping grounds
terrific
ca n't wait
shaving cream
i do n't think so
why
darling did you bring the insect repellent lotion
yes darling
oh and the sun block
of course
what spf sweetie
fifteen
perfectomundo
we are ready
say would n't it be wonderful to have an insect repellent lotion that also worked as a sun block
think of all the time one would save
yes darling
i think i 'll get johannsen in chemistry on that
oh
did you bring the first aid kit
yes
flares
absolutely
we could call it quit bugging me sunny
get it
sunny
s u n n y
that 's very funny
i love you so much
did you see that
what
i do n't know
something
a deer
no
too
upright
might 've been a person
it might behoove us to turn back at this point
... what is it that makes us human if not the knowledge that we are indeed human
think of this poor soul 's education as the greatest gift we could bestow upon
all right
great
grab his feet
we 'll throw him in the trunk
what are you doing in there
nothing
be right out
who is it
uh huh
right gabrielle
right
who is it
absolutely gabrielle
someone from work
sorry about that gabrielle
uh huh
exactly
who from work
excuse me one second would you gabrielle
it 's hormonal nathan
i ca n't help it
i 'm sorry
your entire body
i 'm getting electrolysis
it 's working but it takes time
so meanwhile i have to
you have to shave
like an ape
apes do n't shave you son of a bitch
do n't quibble
you know what i mean
i 'm sorry
please do n't be mad at me for this
mad
i 'm i 'm
disgusted
i 'm the same person i was before you knew damn it
oh god
i have to think
i have to think
was that okay
i mean was i able to
satisfy you
you are an animal
really
wow
that 's that 's terrific to hear from someone so
feminine so female
i love being female because it how do you say allows me to be close to men
i 'm glad you 're female
do you think our boy witnessed the primal scene
so how 's it going today
good
making progress
honey can we talk tonight
you know about stuff
things have been so strained for the past three weeks since you know and i just want to talk
that 's great
it 's a great color for you
oh nathan let 's have a baby
oh
i did n't see you there sneaky boy
you 're like a boy sneaking in
... the back door of a movie theater
yes indeed
you remember that from my book
i 'm touched
what 's wrong
nothing
hard day
gon na have a drink
i 'll make it
i 'm so happy nathan
everything 's going to be so great
scotch on the rocks right
just kidding
i know what you drink mister
i know what you drink
voila
how 's work
cruddy okay
are you satisfied
no
i do n't want your work to be cruddy
my assistant quit today
okay
he was highly valuable to the project
oh baby
i 'm sorry
ca n't you hire somebody else
i guess
hey
i could come work for you
i know i have n't been all that supportive of this project but i 've come around
have you
oh yes baby
i think that this is a wonderful project you 're doing taking this poor unfortunate uncivilized creature and turning him into a human being
what a wonderful wonderful compassionate man you are
really
yes
and i want to help
you wo n't have to pay me and i was thinking of giving up that crazy nature writing anyway
how come
who needs it
i have you and i have being a woman and i have thinking about womanly things
i love being a woman because
such as what womanly things
such as my man and how to please him
such as making wonderful dinners for my man
such as looking pretty for my man
and i 'm writing an article on quilting for the ladies home journal
i had sold my fucking soul
i let her sell her soul
i stood by as she did it
it 's inexcusable
at the time though i thought it might help
bravo to you puff
that was wonderful
i think he 's ready
oh boy
you just have to control it
we 're not apes
thank you very much for that
puff i 'm proud of you
you did remarkably well under difficult circumstances
absolutely
shut up
yeah this is lila cunt
and do n't let the hirsutism fool you
i know more about being a woman and more about the black hearts of men than you in your pretty little powdered bullshit fantasy world can ever imagine
i know the darkness and cruelty of nature sweetie pie
lila you do n't intend to hurt us do you
eat shit thumbtack dick
thank you frank
you 're the best
aha
finally
i 've covered almost the entire seaboard and parts of eastern ohio
ugnh
look at you two
you both disgust me
oook
oook
shut up
i gave you
life
i created you in my image puff
i took you from this primordial ooze and brought you into the world of culture and art and manners
and this is how you repay me
by heading back to the ooze first chance you get
i should leave you here with lila the ape woman
it would serve you right you ungrateful piece of crap
but i 'm not going to
you 're too valuable to me
totally selfish of me
you serve my purpose
but if you had any smarts you would realize that i serve your purpose as well
life is so much more delightful when lived in a silk suit
ooka
do n't worry lila
you can stay
i do n't have any interest in you anymore
c'mon monkey boy
good eve n ing lay dees and gent- elmen
bravo puff
bravo
oh boy
now puff we 're leaving on the electronic collar
i do n't think we 'll need to shock you but just in case
okay
that 's fair
this is great puff
you 're doing fine
i 'm loving this
it 's such a treat to be out and about
what a wonderful invention a city is
the immense buildings of glass and steel glinting in the afternoon sun the smartly dressed women in their best summer frocks the colorful street vendors
i do n't think this aversion therapy is really necessary doctor
i understand the problem
humor me puff
it 's essential that i am able to trust you to function independently in the world
i bow to your expertise in these matters
lila
excellent work puff
extra desert tonight
yahoo
tomorrow the acid test
puff why do n't you say a few words to the assemblage
it would be my pleasure doctor
distinguished gentlemen and ladies of the psychological community i stand before you today a living testament to the amazing skill of dr. nathan bronfman
to say that he took me from crayons to perfume would be a vast understatement
dr. bronfman took me from playing with my own feces then to crayons and then to an appreciation of the complex works of franz kline joseph beuys and marcel duchamp
from compulsive masturbation to
thanks to you nate
thanks to you buddy
and your diligence and intelligence and perseverance
and of course to you my sweet for your
moral support
here here
interesting
now my diminutive friend what can i do for you
ugnh
oh please is that as articulate as you can be after all the time i spent teaching you
we 've discussed wittgenstein for christ 's sake
not that you ever had anything very original or challenging to say on the subject
unn
down from the tree
both of you
keep your hands where i can see them
do n't want you pulling any weapons out of your fur
puff put the gun down
ounpoo
ungh
let 's be reasonable human beings here
we 're all reasonable human beings are n't we
unka unka unka unka unka
look why do n't you and lila stay here and have your natural life
i 'll just go on my way
you 'll never see me again
i have to talk
is that okay
you did create me in your image nathan
before you i was a simple happy complete being in harmony with the world around me
after you i became duplicitous cynical angry anal totally out of touch with my surroundings
in a word nathan i became you
lila has reintroduced me to myself
and incidentally what i 'm about to do kill you is something that would never have occurred to me to do as a creature of the earth
before when i killed it was for food or in self defense
now i will kill for revenge
revenge is an abstract concept nathan
and i learned abstract thinking from you
no
so anyway that 's the nightmare i 've been having lately
do you suppose it has anything to do with lila 's unusually hairy body
no why
well it seems that since lila broached the subject of children you 've been on edge and i know you have an issue with the uh body hair
oh i see
yes that 's something to think about
that 's very good
that 's what you get the big bucks right
ha ha
i just think it might be important to explore your feelings for lila
i love lila
i mean she 's a wonderful person
and
she loves me
that 's no small potatoes
i mean she really loves me
she 's sacrificed so much to be in this relationship with me
and she 's a good person
a truly good person
how rare is that in this world eh
and how could i stop loving somebody because of a little physical imperfection if it can even be called that
i mean god knows i 'm not perfect
what about my eyesight
it 's lousy that 's what
lila 's not going to leave me because of my eyesight
what about my penis
and how do you feel about gabrielle
it 's a pleasure to meet you mother
but i 'm an ape like dad was
and i have to go back into the woods now
forever
yes i suppose so
i suppose i knew that was going to be what you would say
it 's good to see you again though
yes
i 'm in the book if you ever want to drop me a line or something
i 'm an ape mom
i 'm an ape
and apes do n't drop lines
boys just passing through
yep
pittsburgh
mm hmm
comin in or goin' out
goin' in
we got a sales convention
got ta be there tomorrow
what do you guys sell
thanks
sure is a hot day for driving
late afternoon is better
you guys have plenty of time
make pittsburgh in two maybe three hours
hey he 's right
whaddya say charlie huh
play a little pool
wait out the heat
about sixty seventy bucks
next game ten bucks
give me some bourbon
j. t. s. brown
you want a chaser
no
hey another one for me and another one for the lady
check
you look different
more relaxed
give me a bottle of beer
right
huh
it 's open
what 'll you have
what makes you know so much
how do you know what eddie was thinking
i know
been there myself
we 've all been there have n't we miss packard
does n't your lighter work mr. gordon
oh i forgot all about it
how 's the hands
it 's all right eddie
i 'm sure mr. gordon meant no offense
it was a figure of speech
that 's right miss packard
and a fact is a fact
she 's a smart girl eddie
oh wait a minute miss packard
we 're neighbors now
you can call me sarah
i want to talk to you
do we need words
yeah i think we do
we could try to cut each other up
but that would be bad for everybody
bad for me bad for you
and worst of all be bad for eddie
you know what 's good for him
to win
for whom and for what
for what makes the world go round
for money and for glory
you did n't answer my first question
for whom
all right
today for me tomorrow for himself
no there 's no tomorrow
not with you
you own all the tomorrows because you buy them today and you buy cheap
well nobody has to sell
you bastard
listen miss ladybird you 're here on a rain check and i know it
you 're hanging on by your nails
you let that glory whistle blow loud and clear for eddie and you 're a wreck on a railroad track
you 're a horse that finished last
so do n't make trouble miss ladybird
live and let live
while you can
i 'll make it up to you
how
you tell me
are you ready for another
thank you
could be
well mr. felson maybe you could come out to my place some evening
we could play a few games of billiards
we 'll be there
good good
oh we 'll start small
a hundred dollars a game
you ever played billiards before
i 'm sure mr. felson knows what he 's doing
certainly you can afford a hundred dollars to find out
deal the cards
how much
oh about five hundred
do you really think you can beat him
of course he thinks he can beat me bert
he would n't be playing me if he did n't
right felson
i did n't ask him can he beat you
i already know he can beat you
i asked him will he
with eddie that 's two different things
have you noticed bert
this fellow here bears a striking resemblance to you
it seems as though you might have modeled for the artist
it 's possible
that seems a shame
the night is young
the night is two thousand dollars old
will you take a check bert
cash
how much do i owe you
twelve thousand
okay
sit down
make it twenty
cut
deal
bourbon
j. t. s. brown
two
i 'm buyin
thought you only drank milk
only when i work
yeah
why
i like it
it 's good for you
besides you start drinking whisky gambling and it gives you an excuse for losing
that 's something you do n't need -- an excuse for losing
how did you make out in the poker game
i lost twenty bucks
poker 's not your game
what is
pool
you being cute
i do n't think there 's a pool player alive shoots better pool than i saw you shoot the other night at ames
you got talent
so i got talent
so what beat me
character
yeah
sure sure
you 're damned right i 'm sure
everybody 's got talent
i got talent
you think you can play big money straight pool or poker for forty straight hours on nothing but talent
you think they call minnesota fats the best in the country just 'cause he 's got talent
nah
minnesota fats 's got more character in one finger than you got in your whole skinny body
i got drunk
he drank as much whisky as you did
maybe he knows how to drink
you bet he knows how
you think that 's a talent too huh
knowin how to drink whisky
you think minnesota fats was born knowin how to drink
okay okay
what do i do now lie down on the floor and uh bow from the ankles
what do i do go home
that 's your problem
so i stay
stay until i hustle up enough to play fats again
maybe by that time i 'll develop myself some character
maybe by that time you 'll die of old age
how much do you think you 'll uh need
a thousand
no three thousand at least
he 'll start you off at five hundred a game -- he 'll beat the pants off you
that 's the way he plays when he comes up against a man who knows the way the game is
he 'll beat you flat four or five games -- maybe more depending on how uh
steady your nerves are
but he might -- he just might be a little scared of you and that could change things
but i would n't count on it
how do you know
huh
when nobody knows that much
see that big car parked out by the fireplug on the way in
well that 's mine
i like that car
but i get a new one every year because i make it my business to know what guys like you and minnesota fats are gon na do
i made enough off of you the other night to pay for it twice over
in that case you owe me another drink
eddie is it all right if i get personal
whaddya been so far
eddie you 're a born loser
what 's that supposed to mean
first time in ten years i ever saw minnesota fats hooked really hooked
but you let him off
i told you
i got drunk
sure you got drunk
that 's the best excuse in the world for losing
no trouble losing when you got a good excuse
and winning
that can be heavy on your back too
like a monkey
you drop that load too when you got an excuse
all you got ta do is learn to feel sorry for yourself
it 's one of the best indoor sports feeling sorry for yourself -- a sport enjoyed by all especially the born losers
thanks for the drink
wait a minute
maybe i can help you
to do what
get the three thousand
play minnesota fats again
why
ten reasons
maybe fifteen
and also there 's something in it for me
oh yeah i figured that
how much
seventy five per cent
for who
for me
that 's a -- that 's a pretty big slice
who do you think you are general motors
how much you think you 're worth these days
i 'm puttin up the money i 'm puttin up the time
for that i get seventy five per cent return on my money -- if you win
you think i can lose
i never saw you do anything else
you saw me beat minnesota fats for eighteen thousand dollars
look you wanna hustle pool do n't you
this game is n't like football
nobody pays you for yardage
when you hustle you keep score real simple
the end of the game you count up your money
that 's how you find out who 's best
that 's the only way
why back me then
why not back yourself
go find yourself a big fat poker game and get rich
you know all the angles
i 'm already rich
but i like action
that 's one thing i think you 're good for is action
besides like i say
you got talent
yeah you already told me that
you cut that slice down to bite size and maybe we can talk
no we do n't talk
i do n't make bad bets
seventy five twenty five
that 's it
kiss off
hey wait
what are you gon na do about the money
there are places
i 'll scuffle around
word 's out on you eddie
you walk in the wrong kind of place and they 'll eat you alive
now when did you adopt me
i do n't know when it was
hello eddie
hi
how 's business
ahh slow
why the open hand bridge
something wrong with your hand
yeah
had a little accident
a place called arthur 's
oh
you seem to do all right that way
i 'd say my game is about twenty per cent off
maybe more
what happened
somebody step on your hands
yeah
big creep
broke my thumbs
man named turk baker
you know everybody do n't you
everybody who can hurt me everybody who can help me
it pays
maybe you oughta give me lessons
sign up
where do i sign
the first match i got in mind for you is in louisville kentucky
you name the place boss
i 'll be there
what happened to you anyway
like i told ya
my thumbs
no i do n't mean the thumbs
you already told me about the thumbs
i been thinking
thinking about what
maybe i 'm not such a high class piece of property right now
and a twenty- five per cent slice of something big is better than a hundred per cent slice of nothin'
hey get us a couple of drinks here will ya
j. t. s. brown
you must have a lot of confidence in me
i do n't
but i got confidence in findley
what 's that supposed to mean
means i got confidence that he 's a loser
all the way a loser
you happen to be about only one half loser -- the other half winner
i 'm finished
here i got it
no no
when you play for me i pick up all the tabs
fats knew the game was in the clutch knew he had to do something to stop ya
he played it smart
i played that game bert
in my head i played it a thousand times
play it again
learn something
fats went in the john see
washed his face cleaned his fingernails made his mind a blank combed his hair came back all ready to go
you were through
you saw him you saw how he looked
clean all set to start all over again
hold tight and push hard
you know what you were doing
you were waitin to get beat
flattened out on your butt swimmin around in glory
and whisky
probably deciding how you could lose
fine
good
i 'd hate to think i was putting my money on a cripple
hey whaddya say something like that for
you know that 's real sweet music in there
you can almost smell the action and the money
you know i can feel it right down in the bottom of my shoes
come on let 's go
hey findley 's here
where
over there by the bar
are n't you gon na go over and talk to him
nah
sit tight
he 'll be over here
so does eddie
well i win sometimes
sure
you hustlin me
how do we stand
bout even
when do i raise the bet
i do n't know
bert if that 's his best game i can beat him
level with me eddie
you ever play billiards before
what 's the difference
you got a pool cue balls on the table
all you got ta do is get the feel of it
i can beat him
all right
five hundred
i 'll beat him the next game
how 're the hands
they 're fine
well rack up your cue
we 're leavin
hey bert
wait a minute
i said we 're leavin
i can beat him bert
now he suckered me 'cause he knows how to hustle
i did n't think he did
but i can outplay him
i can beat him
i do n't believe you eddie
i think you 're still a loser
all right then
i 'll play him with my own money
please do n't get off me now
i know when to quit
you do n't
win or lose you do n't know when to quit
what do you want me to do huh
what do you want me to do
just say it and you got it but please do n't get off me now
i wanna walk
it 's a long walk
i got time bert
you want me to tell her for you
tell her what
you got ta be hard eddie
maybe
you want to play
no
hell no
you eddie felson
who 's he
what 's your game
what do you shoot
you name it we shoot it
look friend i 'm not trying to hustle
i do n't never hustle people that walk into poolrooms with leather satchels
do n't try to hustle me
okay i 'm eddie felson
i shoot straight pool
you got any straight pool shooters in this here poolroom
what kind of straight pool game you like
the expensive kind
come up here to play straight pool with minnesota fats
yeah that 's right
want some free advice
he 's my partner
you well heeled partner
you got that wrong mister
i am
okay i told you what i wanted about minnesota fats
you just go ahead and play him friend
just tell me where i can find him friend
comes right in this poolroom every night eight o'clock on the nose
just stay where you are
he 'll find you
druggist supplies
buster here is gon na get an award
no he sold seventeen thousand bucks worth of stuff last month
fastest boy in the territory
yep
fastest and the bestest
hey give us another round will ya
one for him one for yourself
it 's gon na cost ya money
it always does
oh come on stop stalling
grab yourself a cue
you ought to take up crap shooting
talk about luck
luck
whaddya mean luck
you know what i mean
you could n't make that shot again in a million years
i could n't huh
okay
go ahead
set 'em up the way they were before
why
go ahead
set 'em up the way they were before
bet ya twenty bucks
make that shot just the way i made it before
nobody can make that shot and you know it
not even a lucky lush
set 'em up again
c'mon set 'em up again
you 're drunk boy
i 'm not gon na bet ya any more
whaddya mean
let 's get back on the road
you got ta be at that convention in the morning
up the flagpole with the convention
c'mon charlie
you 're into me now
i got my money on the table
i do n't want it
well
well now
do n't be a chump
do n't bet any more money on that damn fool shot
well now
i mean you figure i 'm a little drunk and i 'm loaded on the hip and you just want in real friendly while the money 's still floating huh
okay
go ahead
set 'em up
how do you feel
fast and loose man
in the gut i mean
i feel tight -- but good
quit
he 's too good
charlie i 'm gon na take him
hey how much are we ahead
approximately
one thousand bucks
fats let 's you and i shoot a game of pool for a thousand dollars a game
how much we got
eleven thousand four hundred cash
here in my pocket
preacher go on down and get me some breakfast will ya
egg sandwich and a cup of coffee
you want something charlie
now wait a minute
you 're coming with me
you 're gon na eat breakfast at the hotel
pool game is over
no it is n't charlie
eddie
the pool game is over when fats says it 's over
you wanted ten thousand
you got ten thousand
ah get with it will ya charlie
get with what
you ca n't see it can you charlie
i mean you 've never been able to see it
i came after him
and i 'm gon na get him
i 'm goin' with him all the way
the pool game is not over until minnesota fats says it 's over
is it over fats
twenty five hours eddie
twenty- five hours you been playin straight
give me a drink will ya
you do n't need a drink
will you shut up
just give me a drink
what are you trying to do eddie
you beat him
you beat him bad
you wanna kill yourself
what are ya chicken charlie
well maybe that 's it
i 'm chicken
go on home
just leave me the money
go to hell
charlie boy you better give me that money
c'mon now give it to me
it 's mine
okay here
be a damn fool
is this all we got left
if that 's all you got that 's all we got left
hello charlie
c'mon in
that 's my girl
hello eddie 's girl
i looked all over for you
oh yeah
how 'd you find me
i asked around
with what
do n't worry about it
i 'll raise the money
oh yeah
where
what 's the difference where
i 'll raise it
is it all right if i have another drink
how much
my twenty five per cent
approximately fifteen hundred bucks
oh you crumb
with that fifteen hundred i coulda beat him
that 's all i needed charlie
aw eddie
c'mon c'mon just give me the money
what for
to play fats again
yeah to play fats again
you wanna come back on the road with me okay the money 's yours
but if you wanna give it to minnesota fats
nothing doing
what do you say
you still do n't see it do you charlie
you are nothing but a small- time charlie
you 'd love to keep me hustling for you huh
would n't ya
i mean a couple more years with me scuffling around them little towns and those back alleys
you might make yourself enough to get a little poolroom back in oakland
six tables and a handbook on the side
is that when you say goodbye to me charlie
is that what you think
yeah that 's what i think
all right
that 's what i want
poolroom with a little handbook on the side
getting old
lay down and die by yourself
do n't take me with you
just like that
yeah
just like that
no no more for me
well hello
have n't seen you in a long time
findley
glad to meet you
and i you
i think i 've heard about you mr. felson
you play pocket billiards do n't you
now and then
why do you
a little although i 'm afraid i generally lose
i 'll bet you do mr. felson
i 'll just bet you do
how much
bert i believe mr. felson 's making a proposition
when
you 're very direct mr. felson
that 's right
when
would you like to come out tonight
what time
i 'm having some people over for drinks right after the races
why do n't you all come over
then about nine ten o'clock we can play
you gentlemen care for a drink
no none for me
come on let 's play
by all means
like to raise the stakes mr. felson
okay
there it is
i 'm broke
ah that 's unfortunate mr. felson
for who mr. findley
bert he only beat me by one point
now you ca n't get off me now
here
been an interestin evening
yeah sure has
charles will you call a cab for these gentlemen please
i 'd show you to the door but i
oh yeah yeah
you 're tired
and beat
yeah
you must come again
yeah
sure
hey uh mister
hey okay if i grab a cue
hey you 're eddie felson are n't you
who 's he
now look fella i saw you playing at ames the other night
hey i 'll tell you what -- i 'll play you jack up pool -- just keep one hand in my pocket
oh man you 're way out of our league
what 's the limit
half and a dollar
gimme ten bucks
ten dollars
hi
hi
how much you playin for
a dollar on the five two on the nine
yeah i 'll play you a couple
just for kicks
okay friend
you quittin too
you 're a pretty good player
how much are you ahead
couple of bucks
i guess it 's just you and me huh
yeah i guess it is boy
just you and me
you wanna raise the bet
two on the five five on the nine
you know what kid
i think maybe you 're a hustler
try me
shoot
okay
you quittin friend
yeah i 'm quittin
long wait for a bus
yes
how long you been waiting
what
how long have you been waiting
since four
just a cup of black coffee please
hey ma'am
wait a minute
would you uh like another cup
fine thanks
what time does the bus leave
what bus
yours
eight o'clock
that would n't give us much time would it
well you 're right
i guess it would n't
have a nice trip
thanks
i will
have a nice trip
fair
can i sit down
why not
we already know each other 's secrets
thanks for the uh for the breakfast
two ships that pass in the night should always buy each other breakfast
can i buy you another drink
why did you do that
i wanted to see what kind of a day it is
a day like any other
people come people go
give me a drag
what time is it
eleven o'clock
i 'll be back later
why
come here
oh you need a shave
you must n't go looking like that
there 's a razor and shaving cream in the bathroom
compliments of the house
what did you say that for sarah
how did you know my name was sarah
you told me
i lied
when i 'm drunk i lie
okay
so what 's your name today
sarah
eddie look
i 've got troubles and i think maybe you 've got troubles
maybe it 'd be better if we just leave each other alone
i got my things over at the hotel
i 'll bring them over later
come here
i 'm not sure
i do n't know
well what do you want to know
and why
where you been all day
at school
it 's thursday
oh i forgot
you were asleep when i left
i did n't want to wake you
did you go out
yeah i went out for a couple of hours
you know i 've been living here for almost three years
now in three days it seems as if i know everybody
when i pass people on the street i want to stop and say listen i got a fella
thanks
eddie where do you go when you go out
museums
art galleries
concerts
well i believe you when you say you go to school
you want to go with me
what are you kidding
see that book
i 've been trying to get through that book ever since i first got here
i have n't finished the first chapter
did you read all them books
mm hmm
you got it all in your head
when i 'm sober
they get a little mixed up when i 'm drunk
most of the time they 're mixed up
oh stop talking about yourself like you 're a lush or something
i do n't like it
maybe you ought to go to a clinic get some treatments
i 'm getting treatments right here
eddie what 's in that case
have n't you opened it
no why should i
it 's yours
it 's a machine gun
this guy told me when i came to the big city i 'd have to have a machine gun so i bought one
where do you get the money
to pay for all this
i mean the liquor and the groceries and the rent
from a rich old man who used to be my lover
do you want me to go
no stick around
can i get you something
drink
coffee
you going out
yeah
for a little while
what are you writing
oh it 's a story
a story i 'm making up
give it to me
what 's this supposed to mean
give it back to me
what 's this supposed to mean we have a contract of depravity
all we have to do is pull the blinds down
you told charlie to lay down and die
will you say that to me too
what happens eddie
you 'll find yourself another rich old lover
that 's right
and i 'm sure you 'll help me
who is it
me
it 's eddie
what happened
i got beat up
they
they broke my thumbs
you know someday sarah you 're gon na settle down
you 're gon na marry a college professor and you 're gon na write a great book
maybe about me huh
fast eddie felson hustler
i love you
you need the words
yes i need them very much
and if you ever say them i 'll never let you take them back
you glad
yes i 'm glad
sherry
very old very dry
two
sherry
nice joint
you look very pretty
i feel pretty
well what 's so funny
your tie
i never saw you wear one before
first time for everything
what is it eddie
nothin'
want another drink
what do you want to tell me
well i uh i 'll be leaving town for a little while
for how long
oh i do n't know
a week
a year
more like a week
look i 'll be back
sure
let 's go home
no i want to walk
come here
come on now
do n't you want to know where i 'm going
no
yes i want to know what for
but i do n't want to ask
i 'm going to kentucky
to louisville
with a friend
try to make some money
i need it the money
i 'll be leaving early in the morning
leave now
oh grow up
why should i
sarah i 'm going to kentucky to play pool with a guy by the name of findley
now i need the action and i need the money
i told you i 'd be back
if you were going to come back you would n't have taken me out tonight
you would n't have bought this dress
you 're hustling me eddie
you 've never stopped hustling me
now i never hustled you
even when i thought i was
you know it
what do you want me to do
just sit here and wait
faithful little sarah
pull the shades down and sit
when you feel like coming back you 'll come back
and you 'll love me
and then you 'll go away again
is that your idea of love
i got no idea of love
and neither have you
i mean neither one of us would know what it was if we saw it coming down the street
i 'd know it eddie
i 'd know
for god 's sakes what are you trying to do to me
i love you
well what 's your idea of love
chains
no
i made you up did n't i eddie
you were n't real
i made you up like everything else
there was no car crash eddie
when i was five i had polio
i was never an actress
the rich old man is my father
he walked out on us when i was seven
he sends me a check every month
that 's how he buys his way out of my life
the men i 've known
after they left i 'd say they were n't real i made them up
but you eddie
i wanted you to be real
fifty seven
i 'll be up later
go on back to the hotel
please eddie do n't beg him
would you go on back to the hotel
take a cab go on back to the hotel
does n't all of this come through to you eddie
does n't any of this mean anything to you
that man this place the people
they wear masks eddie
and underneath the masks they 're perverted twisted crippled
shut up
do n't wear a mask eddie
you do n't have to
that 's turk eddie the man who broke your thumbs
only he 's not going to break your thumbs
he 'll break your heart your guts
and for the same reason -- 'cause he hates you 'cause of what you are
'cause of what you have and he has n't
would you get off my back sarah
once and for all will you get out will you get off my back
now and then
you know how it is
you 're uh you 're minnesota fats are n't you
you know uh they say minnesota fats is the best in the country out where i come from
is that a fact
yes sir boy they heh they say that old fats just shoots the eyes right off them balls
where do you come from
california
oakland
california
is your name felson
eddie felson
that 's right
i hear you 've been looking for me
yeah
that 's right too
big john
you think this boy is a hustler
do you like to gamble eddie
gamble money on pool games
fats let 's you and i shoot a game of straight pool
hundred dollars
well you shoot big time pool fats
i mean that 's what everybody says you shoot big time pool
let 's make it two hundred dollars a game
now i know why they call you fast eddie
eddie you talk my kind of talk
sausage
rack 'em up
boy he is great
jeez that old fat man
look at the way he moves
like a dancer
twelve
cross side
and them fingers them chubby fingers
and that stroke
it 's like he 's uh like he 's playing a violin or something
nine ball
three ball
your shot
you miss
well you do n't leave much when you miss do you fat man
that 's what the game 's all about
mm hm
two ball side pocket
very good shot
you know i got ta hunch fat man
i got ta hunch it 's me from here on in
one ball corner pocket
i mean that ever happen to you
when all of a sudden you feel like you ca n't miss
i dreamed about this game fat man
i dreamed about this game every night on the road
five ball
you know this is my table man
i own it
i came to play pool fats
that 's good eddie
for how much
you name it
thousand dollars a game
let 's make it three thousand dollars a game fats
c'mon three thousand dollars
that 's my bankroll my life 's savings
what 's the matter fats
all you got ta do is beat me the first game and i 'm on my way back to oakland
let 's go
shoot pool fast eddie
i 'm shootin pool fats
when i miss you can shoot
i quit eddie
i ca n't beat you
willie give him the stakes
you got yourself a pool player
preacher gimme my coat will ya
... you shoot a great game of pool
so do you fast eddie
you -- think i am -- i 'm -- -- an animal
no
i ca n't live like you do -- all your machines and -- cold metal and sharp corners --
you lived like this once
that is not now human
my name is robert
it is not arguing to speak the truth
listen to me my blood somehow
helped you
it could help all of you
we could find some way to --
are you all right
yes
do you want to go on
when you 're here in the city where do you live
dark and large
with vines -- no not vines
not alive
who is this
my wife
was this -- beautiful
before
yes
do you remember where it is
what
where you lived with them
you want to find them
yes
you want to kill them
why do n't you start with me
you 're not them
what choice did i have --
you hunt us like animals -- do you know how many you have slaughtered
i only protect myself --
you are the human
the hunter
the thing that comes in the day and kills --
if i 'm a hunter it 's because you taught me to be
what do you want
what do you mean
you know what i mean
that 's who you are too emma
before
when i was one of them
i would look at this and it was just strangers
now i
remember
you want me to stay
yes
do you still want me to stay
yes
emma
he wanted me to see -- he thinks i was -- infected by you
shhh
do n't talk
i want to talk
i just learned again
you have to go
he 'll never stop
leave this place
find another
i 'll go
we 'll both go
far away
good evening
did you have a pleasant day today
busy
i went swimming and prepared a new vehicle
a big vehicle
that sounds charming
did you meet any interesting people today
yesterday
they 're back
have n't seen them for a few months
i have to be careful
tell me about the interesting people you met wo n't you
they are
sinister
they want to kill me
that sounds charming
what are you planning to do tomorrow
stay alive
i remember the first time we met
do you remember that
yes
it was at diane 's party in malibu and i had just broken up with todd and i was loaded for bear any man who had the nerve to come at me -- watch out
so you come sauntering in -- you know that saunter you do
that watch out baby here comes mr. smooth thing
you and that damned garden
yeah but when your mother came what 's the first thing you showed her
i surrender --
besides if we get a lot of work done this summer it 'll be done
it 's never gon na be done
you love puttering out there too much
well it 's not supposed to be done anyway
hell of a night
you got that right
so what do you do
i 'm am architect
i 'm working on a site back in --
you built things
i guess you could say that
bathroom
round back
son
are you awake
yes
we 're going to be moving son
do we have to
i know son
but you 'll like it where we 're going
i 'm getting a good job
it 's a pretty part of the country
i 'll have to go to a new school -- again
you 'll meet new friends
i know
it 's rough
but i have to move son
what 's that dad
that 's the air force base
wow
look at the mountains
this can be your room if you want it
what do you say
is the hill ours too
if we want it it is
let 's check it out dad
wow
there 's the town
and there 's the air base
this is a great hill
it 's got a name
copper ridge
there used to be a copper mine near here
let 's see what 's on the other side
maybe we 'll find some copper
... and rigel
and that one -- to the right of rigel
which one 's that
the dull red one
that 's mars
the closest planet to us now
that 's why it 's more than just a point in the sky
well son
should we call it a night
i for one have had a long day
okay
jim -- what 's wrong
you 've got to come see -- a big thing went down over the hill
it was big -- and it glowed -- and it went down over there -- behind the hill
what did it look like
it was -- it was -- it changed shape
first it was big and round then it was flat then it was long and thin
are you sure you saw that
in the rain -- it may have u looked</u like it changed shape --
i do n't know dad
but it was big
i 'll go take a look when the rain lets off
are you all right dad
sure
fine
i lost it
it 's kind of muddy out there
was there anything over the hill
i know ellen
we 'll settle down soon
i was so scared
better now son
i have to go over to the town this morning and do a lot of shopping
this house needs just u everything</u>. i 'll probably be gone all day
jimmy hurry up and eat or you 'll be late
i 'll take you to school
you do n't have to
the school bus stops right outside here at 7:30
i 've got to run
it 's probably the solenoid
take it back to gleason 's they said they 'd fix it if we found anything wrong
i will
but is n't that odd -- about my dream
what happened to you
who was that
that 's ed
ed works with the bell telephone switching division
where 's your car
i left it at work
you did
why
where were you
they said you left hours ago
we were worried
i 'm home now
yes -- but
you know it really is beautiful up there
let me show you
we 'll take a walk after dinner
george you 're acting very strangely
what 's wrong ellen
it 's his nightmare
he still has n't gotten over it
about the other side of the hill
better get some sleep son or you 'll be pretty tired at school tomorrow
good night
what did he talk to you about
he was upset with moving i believe
is that all he said
why yes
why
hello this is ms. magnuson speaking
i understand miss that you have my son in your office
yes i do mr. gardner
may i ask why
we were having a little talk
about what
children often have trouble adjusting to a new school
i do n't know what he 's told you -- what u has</u he told you
would you like to tell u me</u --
mr. gardner i --
you people have a lot of nerve taking it on yourselves to encourage young children to speak out of turn
i 'm of a mind to pull him out of school if this is your idea of how to handle
what sort of training do you have anyway
mr. gardner i do n't think this is the place to discuss this matter
i 'm not particularly interested u ms.</u magnuson in what you think is correct
my wife and i are going away on a business trip this afternoon and we want jimmy with us
keep him in your office until we arrive
of course
this is a new town for you
do you like it here
no
why not
moving is hard for anybody
was it hard for you to leave all your friends
i do n't have many friends
dad 's all the time moving
can you tell me about that
that 's quite a story
you know that do n't you
yes
a ufo lands in back of your house and puts something in your dad and mom 's necks
then it gets the police and your teacher too
how did it get mrs. mckeltch
she said the frog came from around the copper ridge
she must 've been behind the hill
what would you think if somebody told you a story like this
i 'd believe him
why
'cause he would n't lie
do you know how to follow a map
yes
i can even read star maps
this shows how to get to my home
i 'm giving you back roads and footpaths so there 's less chance of you being seen
jimmy calm down
what happened
tell me what happened
i got trapped in mrs. mckeltch 's van -- and she went to the tunnel and went down there with them -- behind my house
i saw them
where jimmy
behind my house up on the ridge
if we go and look and there 's nothing there you 'll have to admit to me that this is all in your mind
this is where it was -- the tunnel opening
i do n't see anything
no but it was here
does it look to you like anything landed here
maybe -- it landed in the bushes
stay here
i 'm going to make a phone call
who are you calling
the state police
did you call the state police
all their lines were busy
no one comes here after dark
hide the car
damn
i know a way
what is it
i do n't know
i do n't know what i 'm doing here --
but you saw -- the men go under the sand
yes
yes but i 'm not sure what i saw anymore
do n't go in
i 'm not
they must be tunneling under the whole town
we ca n't do this alone
we 've got to get help
there was a man named colonel wilson from the air force base
he was talking in our class
he said we could visit him any time we wanted
i 'll bet he could do something
let 's try
what do you think he saw
could it have been something from the air base
no mom
it was n't a plane
george where have you been
what happened to your other slipper
your father asked you a question
what
-- i
hi
sorry i 'm late
the back door was open
mom
i got ta talk to you
what
do n't go over the hill mom
please
when
this afternoon
it 's wonderful up there -- you still have n't seen the best part
i have school
i 'll pack us a lunch
hamburgers
you always like that do n't you
it 's all this moving from place to place
we 're never settled
i 'm having nightmares myself
what kind mom
oh i ca n't remember
but people do have bad dreams when their routine is disturbed
what 's the story on jimmy gardner
gardner
oh um -- he 's a new student
just moved here
why
his teacher brought him in to see me
said he 'd been acting up in class
creating a disturbance
i could n't get a thing out of him
oh
what 's his family background
they 're from out of state
father 's an engineer at the nuclear power plant
i really do n't know much about them
this could be our last night on earth
i do n't want to die a virgin
if we do we 'll both die virgins
but at last we 'll be together
what do you want
you have to leave the white house
this is not the time or the place to have this same old discussion
you do n't understand
you have to leave washington
in case you have n't noticed we 're in a little bit of a crisis here
i 've worked with embedded loading
they 're communicating with a hidden signal
they 're going to attack
you 're being paranoid
it 's not paranoia
the embedding is very subtle
it 's probably been overlooked
what
connie do n't hang up
david
how 'd you get this number
walk to the window
right in front of you
and when is the countdown supposed to expire
fifty six minutes forty five seconds
what do you want me to do
i want you to leave with us
right now
i ca n't leave
we have to tell this to the president
he 's not going to listen to me
you ca n't be seriously considering firing nuclear weapons
david do n't
just my luck no ice
i take it you 've heard
a toast to the end of the world
with you
i do n't understand why you ca n't just show someone how to plant the virus somebody trained for this kind of mission
if anything goes wrong i 'll have to think quickly adjust the signal who knows
are you all right
did it work
you bet it did
david thought i was having an affair which i was n't
punched the president
oh my god
moishe martinsburg mr. president
my ex husband works in satellite communications
he still gets air sick huh
in all of this i did n't get the chance to thank you two
think nothing of it spanky
spunky
he told you about that
all he could think about was getting to you
there 's still love there i think
love was never our problem
all you need is love
john lennon
smart man
shot in the back very sad
can we expect the same kid of panic here as in russia
more than likely
i do n't know how you put up with him
he used to run the nasa
he knows where all the bones are buried
comes in handy
i 'll bet
what the hell is the point of having a beeper if you do n't turn it on
it was turned on
i was ignoring you
what 's the big emergency
started this morning
every channel is making like it 's nineteen fifty
snow static all kinds of distortions
no one knows what the hell is going on
what the hell is this
so sue me
did you try to switch to transponder channels
please would i be this panicked if it was that simple
let 's retrofit the dish to another satellite
we 've tried
it 's not working
it 's almost as though they were n't even there
there 's good news and bad news
what 's the bad news
you 're in meal penalty for disturbing my lunch
and the good news is you wo n't charge me
no
the good news is i found the problem and it 's not our equipment
there 's some weird signal embedded within the satellite feed
that 's the good news
yes because the analog signal has a definite sequential digital patterns embedded within it
when i find the exact binary sequence and i apply a phase reversed signal to that calculated spectra analyzer i built you last christmas we should be able to block out the overlay completely
... and we 'll be the only guys in town with a clear picture
that 's my man
i 've got a lock on the signal pattern
we can filter it out
huh
oh good good
strange thing is if my calculations are right it 'll be gone in approximately seven hours anyway
the signal reduces itself every time it recycles
eventually it will disappear
are you listening
can you believe this
what 're you talking about
have n't you been watching
tell her to get the kids and leave town
what happened
just do it
what are you waiting
my social security will expire you 'll still be sitting there
i 'm thinking
so think already
you have any idea how long it takes for those things to decompose
you do n't move soon
i 'll begin to decompose
david i 've been meaning to talk with you
it 's nice you 've been spending so much time with me but
dad do n't start
i 'm only saying it 's been what
four years you still have n't signed your divorce papers
three years
three four
move on
it 's not healthy
pops
the television said they 've started with the looting already
vultures
you still got the olds
you want to borrow the car
you do n't have a license
that 's okay
you 're driving
it 's the white house for crying out loud
you ca n't just drive up and ring the bell
ca n't this thing go any faster
you think they do n't know what you know
believe me they know
she works for the president
they know everything
they do n't know this
and you 're going to educate them
tell me something you 're so smart how come you spent eight years at m.i.t. to become a cable repairman
dad
all i 'm saying is they 've got people who handle these things david
they want hbo they 'll call you
what the hell is that
this pops is every phone book in america
you think an important person like constance is going to be listed
she always keeps her portable phone listed for emergencies
sometimes it 's just her first initial sometime her nickname
not listed huh
i just have n't found it yet
i tried c. halbrook connie halbrook spunky halbrook
spunky
college nickname
you try martin
she did n't take my name when we were married
perfect she 's using it
it 's perfect the line is busy
yes
i can use he signal to triangulate her exact position in the white house
you can do that
dad please
what was it roswell
you had the space ship the bodies everything locked up in a bunker the what is it area fifty one
that 's it
area fifty one
you knew and you did n't do nothing
david david
what the hell are you doing
i 'm making a mess
this i can see
we 've got ta burn the rain forest pops
dump toxic waste pollute the air rip up the ozone
maybe if we screw this planet up enough they wo n't want it anymore
david you 're drunk
pops you 're a genius
what 'd i say
a cold
of course
thanks pops
i want you should know i 'm very proud of you son
i 'll see how they 're doing with the radio transmitter
oh shit we 're late
we 'll meet you there
i have a confession to make
i 'm not real big on flying
great
what the hell are you doing
just getting a feel for her
must be thousands of them
what are they doing
looks like they 're preparing the invasion
nice meeting you
you as well
we 're loose
does n't matter
game 's over
i do n't hear no fat lady
with your permission mr. president i 'd like to remain my your side
i had a feeling you would
sir what happens if they do become hostile
then god help us
general grey co ordinate with atlantic command
tell them they have twenty five minutes to get as many people out of the cities as they can
but mr. president
and get those helicopters away from the ship
call them back immediately
is my wife in the air
she should be shortly
any news on my wife
the helicopter never arrived at nellis and there 's been no radio contact
where are they
eta with target four minutes
atlanta chicago and philadelphia destroyed
and there are scattered reports of sightings over miami ft
worth and memphis
how 're we doing
better than we thought
we have confirmed divisions of troops from different armies all around the world
most of europe the middle east and asia are battle ready
and our troops here
we 've been collecting planes from all over but
but what general
pilots sir
we do n't have enough people to get them in the air
then find them
mr. president just what do you think you 're doing
i 'm a pilot will
this is where i belong
grey you read me
roger eagle one our primary target has shifted course
where 's it headed
i think our secret is out
they 're headed right for us
do not engage until we 've confirmed the package has been delivered
roger
get on the horn with atlantic command
let 's upgrade the situation to defcon 3
that 's not your call to make mr. nimziki
organize a military escort to crystal mountain
sir i strongly recommend we move you to a secured location immediately
you were the head of the national intelligence agency
you knew all about this
when were you planning on informing the rest of us
it had been deemed classified
christ why did n't you say anything about this when they first arrived
you could have warned us before we launched a counter attack that cost us hundreds of american pilots
this is ridiculous
how long would their shields be down
with their shields down it might be possible
please you 're not buying into any of this nonsense are you
we do n't have the manpower or the resources to launch that kind of a campaign
not to mention that this whole cockamamie plan is dependent on a machine that no one in the world is qualified to operate
a meteor
no sir
definitely not
how do you know
well er
it 's slowing down
it 's doing what
it 's
slowing down sir
he 's trying to impress you
he 's doing a good job
you ca n't go
call them back
baby you know how it is
i have to report to el toro right away
you said you were on leave for the fourth
they cancelled it
why are you acting like this
wait
i have to tell you something
what
be careful
look after your shift tonight why do n't you grab dylan and come stay with me on base
really
you do n't mind
naw
i 'll just tell my other girlfriends they ca n't come over tonight
you know you 're not as charming as you think you are
yes i am
dick weed
butt munch
before we do this i want you to know i 'm sorry
sorry for what
i should have done this a long long time ago
you scared the hell out of me
yeah but what an entrance
dick weed
butt munch
your son
he 's my angel
was his father stationed here
he was n't his father
i was kinda hoping he 'd want the job though
so what do you do for a living
i 'm a dancer
really
ballet
no
exotic
oh
sorry
do n't be
i 'm not
it 's good money
side he 's worth it
and when the dancing 's over
what about your future
funny it used to scare me when i thought about the future
guess it does n't really matter anymore
dylan come here
i want you to meet the first lady
i thought you did n't recognize me
did n't want to say anything
i voted for the other guy
i do n't believe it
they make you learn how to fly everything from an apache to a harrier and still they turn you down
what else do they want you to learn
how to kiss ass
jasmine has this thing for dolphins
i had them make it
i thought you said you were doing to break it off
damn it
i did n't even see them fire
command eagle one
switching to sidewinders
we 're moving in
jimmy kick it
they 're gaining
we 're already over mach 2
so push it
stevie
i ca n't
jimmy stay with me
stop it
it 's all fuzzy
you 're gon na break it
just leave it alone
here take your medicine
i do n't need it
just take it dick head
alicia
make sure he takes his medicine
he 's got that sega saturn cd 64 bit right
yeah
what would you think if we went there to live for a while
that 'd be cool
but i gave you some this morning
i did n't take it
i thought i did n't need it anymore
just what the hell do you think you 're doing
i 'm bringing home the bacon
earning my keep
and doing a fine job if i do say so myself
it 's the wrong field you idiot
lucas farm is on the other side of town
you sure
damn it he was doing you a favor
you know how hard it is to find someone who does n't think you 're completely crazy
what are we supposed to do now
huh
where are we supposed to go now
troy 's still my son no matter how you feel about me
for once in your life think about what 's best for troy
who has to beg for money to buy him medicine when you screw up
who
i could n't find anything
everyone is packing up they 're leaving
word is a space ship is heading this way
we should leave too
there 's a group heading south they said there 's a hospital just a couple hours away
i think we should follow them
how he doing
just fell asleep
he 's gon na be just fine
join me in a little celebration
i 'm not leaving
we must maintain a working government in a time of crisis
i want the vice president secretary of defense the whole cabinet and the joint chiefs taken to a secured location
i 'm staying here
i am not going to add to a public hysteria that could cost lives
but mr. president
so far these things have not become hostile
for the moment let 's assume they wo n't
connie let 's issue statements advising people not to panic to stay home and take cover
what the hell 's going on
we 're leaving
i spoke with the joint chief when they arrived at norad
they agree we must launch a counter offensive with a full nuclear strike
hit 'em with everything we 've got
above american soil
if we do n't strike soon there may not be much of an america left to defend
why the hell was n't i told about this place
two words mr. president
plausible deniability
mr. president
deploy
see we ca n't duplicate their type of power so we 've never been able to experiment
but since these guys started showing up all the gizmos inside turned on
the last twenty four hours have been really exciting
people are dying out there
i do n't think exciting is the word i 'd choose to describe it
what can you tell us about the enemy we 're facing
not all too dissimilar to us
breathes oxygen comparable tolerances to heat cold
probably why they 're interested in our planet
hey you wanna see them
can they be killed
these three died in the crash
their bodies are as frail as our own
you just have to get past their technology which is i 'm sorry to say far more advanced
why did you people come here
air
water
your sun
where do your people come from
where is your home
here
now
and before here
many worlds
can we negotiate a truce
is there room for co existance
can there be peace between us
peace
no peace
what do you want us to do
die
oh sallah
what a relief
marcus brody sir
and where is indy
oh he 's in austria
a slight detour
you are on your own
yes but do n't panic
everything 's under control
have you
have you arranged our supplies
oh yes of course
but where are we going
oh this map will show you
it was drawn by uh
oh what
your servant sir
and i am his
my reputation precedes me
there is no museum in iskenderun
may we go home now please
the dog
you are named after the dog
marcus
i did it
you 've got it
you know how long i 've been looking for that
all your life
all my life
well done indy
very well done indeed
this will find a place of honor in our spanish collection
your treat
yes
my treat
what has the old fool got himself into now
i do n't know
but whatever it is he 's in over his head
dad
it 's today 's mail
and it 's been opened
venice italy
what is it
it 's dad 's grail diary
every clue he ever followed
every discovery he made
a complete record of his search for the holy grail
this is his whole life
why would he have sent this to me
i do n't know
but someone must want it pretty badly
do you believe marcus
ah venice
yes
uh how will we recognize this doctor schneider when we see him
i do n't know
maybe he 'll know us
that does n't look much like a library
it looks like a converted church
marcus -- i 've seen this window before
where
look indy
the roman numerals
dad was onto something here
well now we know the source of the numbers but we still do n't know what they mean
how 's the head
it 's better now i 've seen this
it 's the name of a city
alexandretta
hmmm
the present city of iskenderun is built on its ruins
marcus -- you remember what the grail tablet said
across the desert and through the mountain to the canyon of the crescent moon
but where exactly
your father would know
your father did know
look
he made a map
now he knew there was a city with an oasis due east
here
he knew the course turned south through the desert to a river and the river led into the mountains
here
straight to the canyon
he knew everything except where to begin the name of the city
alexandretta
now we know
yes
now we know
marcus get hold of sallah
tell him to meet you in iskenderun
what about you
i 'm going after dad
henry
what are you doing here
it 's a rescue old boy
come on
henry the pen --
what
but do n't you see
the pen is mightier than the sword
look what you did
it 's war
the word of god
no henry
try not to talk
the name of god
indy
henry
follow met i know the way
haaa
got lost in his own museum huh
tell me what 's going to happen when we get to venice
do n't worry
doctor schneider will be there to meet you
schneider
i maintain an apartment in venice at your disposal
oh well
that 's good
thank you
care to wet your whistle marcus
i 'd rather spit in your face
but as i have n't got any spit
well marcus we are on the brink of the recovery of the greatest artifact in the history of mankind
you 're meddling with powers you can not possibly comprehend
well it 's sandstone
christian symbol
early latin text
mid twelfth century i should think
that was our assessment as well
where did this come from
my engineers unearthed it in the mountain region north of ankara while excavating for copper
can you translate the inscription
where the cup that holds the blood of jesus christ resides forever
the holy grail doctor jones
the chalice used by christ during the last supper
the cup that caught his blood at the crucifixion and was entrusted to joseph of arimathaea
the arthur legend
i 've heard this bedtime story before
eternal life doctor jones
the gift of youth to whoever drinks from the grail
oh now that 's a bedtime story i 'd like to wake up to
an old man 's dream
every man 's dream
including your father 's i believe
hard to resist is n't it
the holy grail 's final resting place described in detail
what good is it
this grail tablet speaks of deserts and mountains and canyons
pretty vague
where do you start looking
maybe if the tablet were intact you 'd have something to go on
but the entire top portion is missing
just the same an attempt to recover the grail is currently underway
let me tell you another bedtime story doctor jones
after the grail was entrusted to joseph of arimathaea it disappeared and was lost for a thousand years before it was found again by three knights of the first crusade
three brothers to be exact
i 've heard this one as well
two of these brothers walked out of the desert one hundred and fifty years after having found the grail and began the long journey back to france
but only one of them made it
and before dying of extreme old age he supposedly imparted his tale to a -- to a franciscan friar i think
not supposedly doctor jones
this is the manuscript in which the friar chronicled the knight 's story
it does n't reveal on location of the grail i 'm afraid
but the knight promised that two markers that had been left behind would
this tablet is one of those markers
it proves the knight 's story is true
but as you pointed out -- it 's incomplete
now the second marker is entombed with the knight 's dead brother
our project leader believes that tomb to be located within the city of venice italy
as you can now see doctor jones we 're about to complete a great quest that began almost two thousand years ago
we 're only one step away
that 's usually when the ground falls out from underneath your feet
you could be more right than you know
yes
we 've hit a snag
our project leader has vanished
along with all his research
uh we received a cable from his colleague doctor schneider who has no idea of his whereabouts or what 's become of him
i want you to pick up the trail where he left off
find the man and you will find the grail
you 've got the wrong jones mister donovan
why do n't you try my father
we already have
your father is the man who 's disappeared
donovan
did n't i warn you not to trust anybody doctor jones
impossible
what do you say jones
ready to go down in history
as what
a nazi stooge like you
nazis
-- is that the limit of your vision
the nazis want to write themselves into the grail legend and take on the world
well they 're welcome
but i want the grail itself
the cup that gives everlasting life
hitler can have the world but he ca n't take it with him
i 'm going to be drinking my own health when he 's gone the way of the dodo
the grail is mine and you 're going to get it for me
shooting me wo n't get you anywhere
you know something doctor jones
you 're absolutely right
and my mother 's ears
but the rest belongs to you
looks like the best parts have already been spoken for
the last time i saw your father we were in the library
he was very close to tracking down the knight 's tomb
i 've never seen him so excited
he was as giddy as a schoolboy
who
attila the professor
he was never giddy even when he was a schoolboy
fraulein -- will you permit me
i usually do n't
i usually do n't either
in that case i permit you
it would make me very happy
but i 'm already sad -- by tomorrow it will have faded
tomorrow i 'll steal you another
my dad sent me this diary for a reason
until we find out why i suggest we keep it to ourselves
find something
bingo
you do n't disappoint doctor jones
you 're a great deal like your father
except he 's lost and i 'm not
lower me down
pagan symbols
fourth or fifth century
right
six hundred years before the crusades
the christians would have dug their own passages and burial chambers centuries later
the ark of the covenant
are you sure
pretty sure
would n't it be wonderful if he were here now to see this
he never would have made it past the rats
he hates rats
he 's scared to death of them
do n't wander off
what
i said go around
you said go between them
i said do n't go between them
my room
mine too
what were they looking for
this
the grail diary
uh huh
you had it
you did n't trust me
at least i let you tag along
oh yes
give them a flower and they 'll follow you anywhere
knock it off
you 're not mad
no
no
you like the way i do things
it 's lucky i do n't do things the same way
you 'd still be standing at the venice pier
what do you know about this place
i know the brunwalds are famous art collectors
what are you going to do
do n't know
think of something
how did you get here
where is it
i want it
you came back for the book
why
my father did n't want it incinerated
is that what you think of me
i believe in the grail not the swastika
yet you stood up to be counted with the enemy of everything the grail stands for -- who gives a damn what you think
you do
all i have to do is squeeze
all i have to do is scream
i never expected to see you again
i 'm like a bad penny
i always turn up
elsa
elsa do n't move
it 's ours indy
yours and mine
elsa do n't cross the seal
the knight warned us not to take the grail from here
elsa
elsa do n't
elsa
elsa
give me your other hand honey
i ca n't hold you
i can reach it
i can reach it
dad
out
it 's important
then wait -- count to twenty
no dad
you listen to me --
junior
no
dad get your stuff
we 've got to get out of here
well i am sorry about your head though
but i thought you were one of them
dad they come in through the doors
good point
humpf -- so i was wrong this time
but by god i was n't wrong when i mailed you my diary
you obviously got it
i got it and i used it
we found the entrance to the catacombs
through the library
right
i knew it
and the tomb of sir richard
found it
he was actually there
you saw him
well what was left of him
and his shield
the inscription on sir richard 's shield
alexandretta
it 's a great moment in henry 's life
he turns aside lost to himself for a moment then turns to indy with joy
alexandretta
of course
on the pilgrim trail from the eastern empire
oh junior
... you did it
no dad
you did
forty years
if only i could have been with you
there were rats dad
rats
yeah big ones
what do the nazis want with you dad
they want my diary
yeah
you did n't did you
you did n't bring it did you
well uh
you did
look can we discuss this later
i should have mailed it to the marx brothers
will you take it easy
take it easy
why do you think i sent it home in the first place
so it would n't fall into their hands
i came here to save you
oh yeah
and who 's gon na come to save you junior
no
do n't shoot
do n't worry
he wo n't
she ransacked her own room and i fell for it
how did you know she was a nazi
umh
how did you she was a nazi
she talks in her sleep
ooooh
i like the austrian way better
so did i.
let 's try and get these ropes loose
we 've got to get to marcus before the nazis do
you said he had two days start
that he would blend in
disappear
are you kidding
-- i made that up
you know marcus -- he got lost once in his own museum
dad
what
dad
what
dad
what
head for the fireplace
oh
this is intolerable
i 'm out dad
dad
... the solution presents itself
come on dad
come on
what about the boat
we 're not going on the boat
stop
what
stop
stop
you 're going the wrong way
we have to get to berlin
brody 's this way
my diary 's in berlin
you do n't need the diary dad
marcus has the map
there is more in the diary than just the map
all right dad -- tell me
well he who finds the grail must face the final challenge
what final challenge
three devices of such lethal cunning
booby traps
oh yes
but i found the clues that will safely take us through in the chronicles of st. anselm
but what are they
ca n't you remember
i wrote them down in my diary so that i would n't have to remember
half the german army 's on our tail and you want me to go to berlin
into the lion 's den
yes
the only thing that matters is the grail
what about marcus
marcus would agree with me
two selfless martyrs
jesus christ
that 's for blasphemy
the quest for the grail is not archaeology
it 's a race against evil
if it is captured by the nazis the armies of darkness will march all over the face of the earth
do you understand me
this is an obsession dad
i never understood it
never
neither did mom
oh yes she did
only too well
unfortunately she kept her illness from me until all i could do was mourn her
you know sharing your adventures is an interesting experience
that 's not all we shared
it 's disgraceful
you 're old enough to be her fa
er her grandfather
well i 'm as human as the next man
i was the next man
ships that pass in the night
do you remember the last time we had a quiet drink
i had a milk shake
hmmm
what did we talk about
we did n't talk
we never talked
and do i detect a rebuke
a regret
it was just the two of us dad
it was a lonely way to grow up
for you too
if you had been an ordinary average father like the other guys dads you 'd have understood that
actually i was a wonderful father
when
did i ever tell you to eat up
go to bed
wash your ears
do your homework
no
i respected your privacy and i taught you self reliance
what you taught me was that i was less important to you than people who had been dead for five hundred years in another country
and i learned it so well that we 've hardly spoken for twenty years
you left just when you were becoming interesting
dad how can you
very well
i 'm here now
well
i ca n't think of anything
then what are you complaining about
look we have work to do
when we get to alexandretta we will face three challenges
first the breath of god
only the penitent man will pass
second the word of god only in the footsteps of god will he proceed
third the path of god only in the leap from the lion 's head will he prove his worth
what does that mean
i do n't know
we 'll find out
i did n't know you could fly a plane
fly
yes
land
no
dad -- eleven o'clock
what happens at eleven o'clock
dad are we hit
more or less
son i 'm sorry
they got us
nice landing
thanks
what do you think you 're doing
get down
dad we 're well out of range
now who are all these people
who cares
as long as they 're keeping donovan busy
dad you stay here while sallah and i organize some transportation
dad
you call this archaeology
get out of there dad
dad
junior
only the penitent man will pass
only the penitent man will pass
the penitent man will pass
the penitent
the penitent
the penitent man
the penitent man
the penitent
the penitent man is humble before god
penitent
penitent
the penitent man is humble
but in the latin alphabet jehovah begins with an i
j
junior give me your other hand
i ca n't hold on
i can get it -- i can almost reach it dad
i like indiana
we named the dog indiana
ready
ready
uh huh
after you junior
yes sir
haaa
i knew you 'd come but my strength has left me
who are you
the last of three brothers who swore an oath to find the grail and to guard it
that was seven hundred years ago
a long time to wait
you 're strangely dressed
for a knight
i 'm not exactly
a knight
what do you mean
i was chosen because i was the bravest and the most worthy
the honor was mine until another came to challenge me to single combat
i pass it to you who vanquished me
get that camel out of the way
what happened to marcus sallah
ah they set out across the desert this afternoon
i believe they took mister brody with them
that car belonged to my brother in- law
come on -- come on
i 'm going after those horses
i 'll take the camels
i do n't need camels
but indy --
no camels
this is your last chance
no doctor jones
it 's yours
all right
where 's my father
if you let me go i will tell you where he is
who are you
my name is kazim
and why were you trying to kill me
the secret of the grail has been safe for a thousand years
and for all that time the brotherhood of the cruciform sword has been prepared to do anything to keep it safe
ask yourself why do you seek the cup of christ
is it for his glory or for yours
i did n't come for the cup of christ
i came to find my father
in that case god be with you in your quest
your father is being held in the castle of brunwald on the austrian german border
captain blumburtt and his troops are here to check up on the natives
just a routine inspection tour
the british worry so about their empire -- it makes us feel like well- cared for children
dr. jones you know very well that the thuggee cult has been dead for nearly a century
of course
the thuggees were an obscenity that worshipped kali with human sacrifices
the british army wiped them out about the time of the mutiny of 1857
well mr. prime minister my report will duly note that we found nothing unusual here in pankot
i 'm sure that will please the maharajah captain
as i said before we 'd be happy to escort you to delhi
interested in local curios
no
but i am interested in the occult
and this is a kryta
charming
it 's like the voodoo dolls of west africa
the kryta represents your enemy -- and gives you complete power over him
thank god all that mumbo jumbo rubbish is disappearing
you think so
of course
admittedly it 's taken time
britain 's controlled india for almost two hundred years now
i 'm sure it 's nothing
just rumors
what was it they claimed was stolen
something magical
a sacred rock
rather bizarre menu would n't you say
even if they were trying to scare us away a devout hindu would never touch meat
makes you wonder what these people are
i 've spent by life crawling around in caves and tunnels -- i should n't have let somebody like willie go in there with me
miss scott panicked
when she saw the insects she passed out cold
i carried her back to her room
she was sleeping when i re- entered the tunnel to look around
then she must have run out of the room and you found her
did you discover anything in that tunnel dr. jones
i believe we 're being called to dinner
finally
jones is n't in his room
miss scott -- my troops are leaving at dawn if you want us to escort you to delhi --
no -- you ca n't go
something awful 's happened
they 've got short round and i think indy 's been --
what
we found a tunnel that leads to a temple below the palace
please come with me i 'll show you
who
it 's some kind of cult
and they 've got the sacred stones that indy was searching for
hard to believe is n't it
i remember first hearing your name when i was studying at oxford
i am chattar lal prime minister for his highness the maharajah of pankot
they will escort you to your rooms now
you will be provided with fresh clothes
tonight you will be dining with his highness
dinner
and with a prince
my luck is changing
but look at me -- my god i 've to get ready
listen mr. lal what do you call the maharajah 's wife
his highness has not yet taken a wife
no
well i guess he just has n't met the right woman
miss scott you 're not making any sense
i 'm afraid they 'll kill them
we saw horrible things down there -- they had a human sacrifice and they ripped a man 's heart out
i sense the fumes of opium in all this
perhaps miss scott picked up the habit in shanghai
what 're you talking about -- i 'm not a dope fiend
i saw it
i 'll show you
i would say you look rather lost
but then i can not imagine where in the world the three of you would look at home
lost
no we 're not lost
we 're on our way to delhi
this is miss scott -- and mr. round
my name 's indiana jones
dr. jones
the eminent archaeologist
we 'd appreciate it if the maharajah would let us stay tonight
we 'll be on out way in the morning
i am only his humble servant but the maharajah usually listens to my advice
i had a question mr. prime minister
i was examining some of the maharajah 's artifacts
a very fine collection of very old pieces do n't you think
yes very fine
but not all of the pieces look old
some were carved recently and look like images used by the thuggees to worship the goddess kali
i suppose stories of the thuggees die hard
there are no stories anymore
well i do n't know
we came here from a small village and the peasants there told us that the pankot palace was growing powerful again -- because of some ancient evil
there you see captain
a rock
when they lost this rock their fields and animals died
they also said their children were taken from them
i think that 's enough of this nonsense dr. jones
i was dubious myself at first
then something connected -- the village 's rock and the old legend of the sankara stones
dr. jones we are all vulnerable to vicious rumors
i seem to remember that in honduras you were accused of being a grave robber rather than a scientist
the newspapers exaggerated the incident
and did n't the sultan of madagascar threaten to cut your head off if you ever returned to his country
that was a misunderstanding
exactly what we have here dr. jones
mola ram is telling the faithful of out victory
he says the british have left the palace which proves kali ma 's new power
yes i understand
you understand what he tells us
kali ma protects us now and for ever and we must pledge our devotion by worshipping her with an offering of flesh and blood
dr. jones
lao she
nee chin lie how ma
you never told me you spoke my language dr. jones
i do n't like to show off
so it is true dr. jones
you found nurhachi
sure i found him
then last night i had a little trouble
somebody tried to slit my throat
you have insulted my son
next time i 'll cut off more than his finger
dr. jones -- i want nurhachi
wow
holy smoke
crash landing
step on it short round
okey doke indy
hold onto your potatoes
you got the tickets short round
sure indy -- three tickets
you me and wu han --
indy
okay shorty
indy they make our plane crash
to get you here
it 's just superstition shorty
like a ghost story
i ride with you indy
nope you got a little surprise over there shorty
indy look
that 's it
pankot palace
what you look at indy
just a statue
that little maharajah think he big stuff
you do n't like him do you
next time i flatten him
did you see his eyes
no
indy they glow like fire and get real crazy
then he talk in this real scary voice
what does it mean indy
follow in the footsteps of shiva
do not betray his truth
the village knew their rock was magic -- but they did n't know it was one of the lost sankara stones
why they glow like that
legend says that when the stones are brought together the diamonds inside of them will glow
this is nainsukh -- from the village
they bring him here to dig in the mines
why
come one what 's wrong
behind you
slow on the curves or we 'll fly off the tracks
read you loud and clear indy
let up on the brake
what
you were caught trying to steal the sankara stones
nobody 's perfect
the way i heard it you stole one of them from a small village
there were five stones in the beginning
over the centuries they were dispersed by wars sold off by thieves like you
two are still missing
no
they are here -- somewhere
a century ago when the british raided this temple and butchered my people a loyal priest hid the last two stones down here in the catacombs
that 's what you 've got these children -- these slaves digging for
they dig for the gems to support our cause
they also search for the last two stones
soon we will have all five sankara stones and the thuggees will be all powerful
nobody can say you do n't have a vivid imagination
you do not believe me
you will dr. jones
you will become a true believer
no the stones are mine
you 're betrayed shiva
on the way to delhi you will stop at pankot
pankot is n't on the way to delhi
you will go to palace there
has n't the pankot palace been deserted since the mutiny of 1857
no
now there is new maharajah -- and palace is powerful again
it is pankot palace that kills my village
i do n't understand
what 's happened here
the evil starts in pankot
then like monsoon it moves darkness over all country
what evil
they came from palace and took sivalinga from out village
it is why krishna brought you here
nobody brought us here
our plane crashed
we were shot down by --
no
we pray to krishna to help us find the stone
it was krishna who made you fall from sky -- so you can got to pankot palace
to find sivalinga -- and bring back to us
was the stone very smooth
it was probably brought here from a sacred river
long ago -- before my father 's father
and it had three lines painted across it
the lines represent the three levels of the universe
i 've seen stones like the one you lost
but why would the maharajah take this sacred stone
they say we must pray to their evil god
we say we will not
you will find them when you find sivlalinga
i 'm sorry i do n't know how i can help you here
i like the service here
hey he 's not a waiter
no wu han 's an old friend i brought along
so the game 's not over
put the antidote on the table lao
listen we just met for crissake
i 'm not that kind of girl
do n't get your hopes up -- where 's the antidote
you do n't look very good
poison never agrees with me
pull a right short round and head for the wang poo bridge
what 're we going to do
where 're we going
the airport
no look out short round
left left
i 'll take the extra ticket
where 's this plane going anyway
siam
siam
but i 'm not dressed for siam
so what 're you supposed to be a lion tamer
since i was nice enough to let you tag along why do n't you give your mouth a rest
okay doll
i 'm freezing
what do you mean tag along
from the minute you walked into that nightclub you have n't been able to keep your eyes off me
oh yeah
are you crazy a lift raft
we 're not sinking we 're crashing
get over here damn it
short round come on grab onto me tight
you all right
no
i 'm not cut out for the kind of life you lead
oh no
i ripped my dress
where are we anyway
god i am starving but i ca n't eat this
that 's more food than these people eat in a week
they 're starving too
took what
it 's a sacred stone in a shine that 's supposed to protect a village
and then they took their children
their children
what 'd he say now
it was destined that i came here -- and the future can not be changed
hey willie -- i think you better get out now
stark naked
you wish
if you 're trying to seduce me dr. jones this is a very primitive approach
me seduce you
honey you 're the one who took your clothes off
i just came over to remind you that you never know what else might be in the water
somehow i feel safer in here
indy
help me
do n't worry i 'm coming in
what is it
a snake
a what
a snake
hurry help me out of here
what 're you waiting for
uh listen -- willie -- i got a better idea
what
first of all -- do n't panic
oh -- my -- god -- it 's going to crush me
keep stroking it
what 's happening
it 's starting to let go
that 's good -- you 're doing fine
thanks for nothing
i hate snakes
i know the feeling
where 'd you find your little bodyguard
i met short round when he tried to pick my pocket
shorty 's family was killed when they bombed shanghai
he was living on the streets
he 'll be okay
he 's a good kid
by the way how 'd you end up in shanghai
well when my nightclub career was run over by the depression some pinhead convinced me that a girl could go places in the orient
so look where i got
what about the future
oh that 's easy -- i 'm going to latch onto a good looking incredibly rich prince
i 'd like to find one of those myself
oh really
yeah but he 's got to be dead and buried for a couple of thousand years
fortune and glory
is that what you 're hoping to find at this palace dr. jones
maybe
could n't keep away huh
just try and control yourself
he 's afraid of something
he said he could n't take us any farther
he has to go sell the elephants
you mean we have to walk the rest of the way
any more complaints
yeah i wish you 'd thought of this sooner
i 've always had a weakness for folk dancing
she might get away with that act here but she 'd never make it in a real nightclub
that 's the maharajah -- that kid
maybe he likes older women
cheer up you lost your prince but dinner 's on the way
i 've never been so hungry in my life
not leftovers
no -- real food
you 're nice
listen i 'm taking applications -- how 'd you like to be my palace slave
wearing your jewels to bed princess
you 're dying to come into my room are n't you
you want me so bad why do n't you invite me
too proud to admit you 're crazy about me dr. jones
i think you 're too used to getting you own way willie
we 'll see who gives in first -- i 'll leave my door open
do n't catch cold
dr. jones
five minutes
you 'll be back over here in five minutes
you 're dreaming willie
you want to make it real just knock on my door
no -- do n't you see -- crawling --
what -- the bug
get -- the -- bug -- off
gee i would n't want to touch an ugly critter like that
oh no -- oh no
you know willie i 'll bet he 's mad because they were eating his friends for dinner
please -- oh please i 'm going to die
get it off
what
willie come here
hurry up we 're in trouble
willie
i 'm coming what 's the rush
ohh
what 's that
there 's stuff all over the floor
i ca n't see a thing
a fulcrum release lever
i ca n't find any lever
help me indy
there 's a hole
i found a square hole
that 's it -- the release lever -- look inside
i am -- it looks horrible
oh god it 's soft -- it 's moving
willie
what is it
it 's a thuggee ceremony
they 're worshipping kali the goddess of death and destruction
oh my god
he ripped out his -- he killed him
no
the heart 's still beating
let 's go
let 's get out of here
quiet
wait -- what 're you doing
i 'm going down
down
down there
are you crazy
i 'm not leaving without those stones
you 're gon na get killed chasing after your damn fortune and glory
maybe
someday
not today
it 's okay
you 're all right now
they think i 'm insane
tell them i 'm not indy
please -- help me
i was scared to death last night when i thought they were going to kill you
no
they wo n't kill me
you know you 've been nothing but trouble since i hooked up with you -- but i have to admit i 'd miss you if i lost you
what 're we going to do
there 's got to be another way out
i ca n't
go
let her go
our only chance is outrunning them
what above the curves
anymore ideas
yeah -- this time you 're gon na help
i guess mola ram got what he wanted
not quite
the last sankara stone
and they do n't even know what it really is
well you did n't get your prince and there goes your diamond
you did n't do so well yourself
finding that stone could 've gotten you all the fortune and glory you were talking about
it 's still a long way to delhi
who knows what might happen
i get it
you got it
i do n't appreciate being cooked like a french fry
willie come on
i said something
i know you did
no not her
me
who 's you
my name is al
al
where are you,
al
you 're not gon na believe this
try me
i'm
inside you
i 'm reporting you to the
.. transit authority
what 's going on
... reporting
him
ventriloquism
on a bus
do n't do that
why not
arrrgh
it was n't him
who was it
me
who
al
no
no
it 's nothing
rehearsing a play
what light through yonder window breaks
it is al
and he 's in my head
what is your name
you 're in my head
you do n't know my name
i just got here
what
you lose your lease on a condo
where are we
where are we
we 're on the street
we 're walking down the street
we 're talking to ourselves
people are staring at us
what street
what street
we 're walking down queer street
we coming to dopey drive
we 're about to be put somewhere quiet where they wo n't mind that we talk to ourselves
why do n't we go home
go home
good idea
get some rest
... i need to make a phone call
do me a favor al
yeah
shut up
somebody 's been here
where are we now
my place ca n't you see
no
you 're in my head you can talk to me and hear what i say but you ca n't see anything
right
kind of an oversight would n't you say
i 'm working on it
soon as i find the right nerve bundle
nerve bundle
what are you doing
you just leave the nerve bundles right where they are
who are you
who am i
yeah
who
well
if you 're in my head
to you i'm
god
quit screwing around this is important
it 's my head i 'll be the judge of that
anyway who are you
i told you my name is al
what are you doing in my head al
you 've heard of the pem114
that a new datsun
are you threatening me
i 'm trying to get you to listen to reason
look
i did n't ask to be in you
do n't blame me for it
you did it
me
what 'd i do
yeah
what did you do
you explain it
why i 'm not at the lab right now in my tube with my crew
explain that
i do n't know what you 're talking about
the nicholson node
i suppose you have n't heard of that either
no
you 've heard of u.s.t.
i just went there for a job
then how 'd i get here
i know
it sounds insane
you said it
you 'll be alive
with a man in my head
yeah
what was that
who was that
somebody out there
you were n't listening
sorry
all this
buzzing in my head
why do n't i just take you back to ust
why do n't you
no they wo n't
why not
i 'll talk to them
oh
gooood
i 'll tell you what to say
if i get you back to the lab will you get out of my head
if i 'm real they 'll get me out
if i 'm not they 'll treat you
either way you 'll be better off than you are now
you 'll get a reward
anyone there
no one
maybe i dreamed it all up
behind us
still clear
just a motorcycle
what 's that
nothing
just the cyclist
he 's passed us
what 'd he look like
he 's not the problem
it 's the van in the back
i would n't say that
then what are you stopping for
get your breathing down
you sound like a cement mixer
ca n't see a goddamn thi
i want out
too late
they want you
why
al you know too much
i do n't know anything
i just want to go home
you have no choice you 're involved
will you help
calm down
act rational
how do you act when someone trys to kill you
i do n't know
to get al
no
do n't tell the guards
did you hear that
yeah
al wants to talk to you
it ca n't take that long
why
joe or what
i do n't know
i do n't want to find out
they 'll have to take you apart
piece by piece
why do n't you just get out leave me alone
sue them
i 'll sue
i do n't like the sound of that
we have to get out of here
door 's locked
see the codelock
punch this in
26993
now what
go out take your first left
just walk down the hall
with authority
which way do i go
what does it say
corridor a.
take a left and your next right
where are we going
a lab and equipment
is it familiar
have you been here before
i was thirsty
he told me to get a drink
who did
the man
oh my god
what did he look like the man
i ca n't remember
like the guys that attacked us
what do you mean
black suits and helmets
that 's it
they know i 'm in here
we 've got to find them
that 's not a good idea
they think we 're safe here
they do n't really need us
they 're probably long gone
gone where
do n't know
wait a minute
the fight
where did he get you
just scratched my arm why
i 'll be out of touch for a while
just get to the airport
the airport
hey wait a minute
i 'm back
i 'm at the airport
good
get to a phone
who is it
not who
a data bank
just keep your ear to the phone and do n't make a sound
do n't talk i told you
you just screwed it up
what am i supposed to do
nothing
you just do nothing
what is it
composition of the sand
trace elements
unique
what do we do
send a man there
a secret agent
who
wait a minute
i 'm no agent secret or otherwise
and
i'm alone
you are not alone
but you are incon- picuous
and with our abilities
you mean
just leave
we get on a plane
we get on which plane
what about money
what about it
i do n't have any
use my credit cards
i ca n't do that
why not
it 's illegal
who cares
i 'll get in trouble
you are in trouble
now do it
it 's just not enough
it 's attitude
how you carry yourself
what 's wrong with how i carry myself
nothing but it 's yours
change it
change your whole persona
oh yeah to what
you 'll be me
i do n't want to be you
i do n't even like you why would i want to be you
because you got my id
now brace yourself
i 'm gon na try something with your glands
you leave my glands alone
now what
the beach
the beach
how else do you get seaweed under your nails
eating sushi
just get there
holy shit
what is it
... just beautiful
do you notice anything
the sky the sun the sea
there 's no one here
it 's deserted
what now
swim
good idea
take it easy now
do n't want you in over your head
little late for that
here
all the seaweed you want
now what
you eat it
you eat it
you know what this stuff tastes like
i 'm living on freeze dried limas and ham
just eat it
now what
the sand
eat it
eat it
i do n't want to eat it
why not
it 's sand
for chrissakes it 's only sand
you should see some of the stuff that 's floating around in here
that sand 's the cleanest thing in you including me
now eat it
now lie down somewhere quiet and rest i 'll be back in a while
where are you going
wait
this must be business there 's nothing else here
follow it
she's
pretty fast
you 're out of shape
what is it
she 's beautiful
what do i do
you 're beautiful
what 's happening
she does n't seem to understand
try another language
which language
how should i know
help me out will you
what can i do
you 're on your own
what do i do
do n't just stand there say something
what
anything
aw hell
just tell her the truth
wait
wait
... joe
no
you idiot
what happened
... rene
where are you going
to the hotel
to register
without your pants
maybe they wo n't stand on ceremony
good thing i 'm here to do the thinking
yeah
some help
that poetry really killed her
it worked
i made it work
you stumbled around
remember you 've got my id you 've got to be me not some stumblebum
rene
i 'm not some hot shot test pilot
i 'm not some playboy
i do n't usually pick up girls
well you did it today
yeah
i did it
but you 've got to have
sophistication
savoir faire
now where would i be
what are you looking at
but what 's it look like
what 's nothing look like
it looks like nothing
is something glinting
what is it
looks like
the optic nerve
i can see out
you really like that shirt
this
is not going to work out
not that tie with that coat
why not
what did that cost
you want sophistication it do n't come cheap
does n't
which one is she
the beautiful one
they both look good to me
you have no taste
get close to them
that place
by the window
you 're not just after this girl are you
who me
you got a better idea you tell me
other than her there 's no one here i know
pan the group will you
if you 're right at least one of them
is involved
that 's a big if
who are they
stay on them will you
how can we find out
wait
the glasses
what glasses
the drinks
stay on them
which one
the blond
gruner
a killer
killer
just do n't show fear
i do n't know what 's going on
it lends you an air of mystery
he recognises you throw him off
my coast is maine actually
we have a place in bar harbor
and a bar in sutton place
do n't get too cute
joe be careful
... i 've lost something
i must get it back
they 're all in it
how do you know
voice stress analyzer
your data must be bad
everyone ca n't be lying all the time
even rene
she 's the toughest to read
maybe she 's telling the truth
ca n't tell
every time i try her you look away
or you make noises
maybe you do n't want to know
come on
look at her
do n't you know anything about women
the data is skewed
we might as well go with instinct
what is it your charm
this just wo n't work
you 're doing great with her
not her
you
what is it
you ca n't listen
you ca n't watch either
it 's embarrassing
what if she says something important
i 'll be right here
i 'll keep it in mind
i 'll get a lot more from her without you butting in
what am i supposed to do
you got any books in there
oh come on
you shut down your sensors
joe
it 's 56 hours
i mean it
you watch old tapes of the ballgame i 'll fill you in
later
i mean it
she 's got the most beautiful
s
shit
you 're in love
and on my time
it 's not your time
i get time off
you get time off to sleep
no
what do you hope
al i hope
i just hope
that someday you 're real small and you 've got no time
and you got no one to help you
and you depend on me
and you know what i 'll do
no
what will you do
i
i'll got to the movies
that 's what i 'll do
you been had
we have
it was n't like that
some agent you are
why do n't you get out of my face
bingo
you found her
better
i found ryuji
that 's good
it 's not better
where
osaka
osaka
fountainhead of high tech
do n't you think i stand out like this
we are trying to stand out
right near his address
easier to get them to come to us than to try and find them
now keep your eyes open something might present itself
i 'm running in circles in the middle of some foreign country
i do n't speak their language they do n't speak mine
i do n't even know where i am
what 's going to present itse
.....
what do i do
follow her
on what
run stupid
sapporo
just stay here and rest
where are you going
down to your heart
i 'm gon na clean some fat out before you drop on me
wait a minute
wait a minute
al you leave my heart alone
joe
i 'm here
you 're okay
what do i do
relax
let me do this
relax
make your mind a blank
it is a blank
this is no time for zen
what are you doing
wait a minute
lets think this through
you think
that 's what you 're good at
yeah
you've fallen for her
i told you i have a feeling
one of your instincts
i know she 's not with them
i know something else
what 's bothering you is n't her
do n't touch a thing
do n't worry
... drink it
too late
what next
drink lots of water
ow
a hard left
a hard left
door to the right
get up and run
i ca n't see a thing
neither can they
what
never mind just say it
he was with gruner
you were with gruner
i need a guide and you need a client
and 1000
no
you ca n't trust her
hiroshima
she 's going with us
are you out of your mind
probably
i do n't trust her
then why let her out of our sight
besides she 's all we 've got
it 's him
come on
plenty of circuits in a walkman
i 've got an idea
i was afraid of that
haka xuki
haka xuki
what 's that mean
cash
left
the one with the red dot
well
it 's not the one
wait
there 's a label
he hung us up dry
while he makes the run
where
it 's in the watch
he lead us on that chase while dieter brought the chip into hong kong
and dieter
he must not know
gruner just made the switch back
then why 'd he lead us here
he did n't
he left us that walkman chip to confuse us
would have kept most people busy
we were too fast for him
do it
i ca n't handle that thing
do n't worry i can
are you alright
just fine
i 'll do the driving from now on
aim just in front of his face
aim what
there 's a lot you do n't know
and do n't let her know either
this may hurt
well do n't let it
what are you doing
pretty advanced is n't it
ought to be they stole everything and reverse engineered it
looks like all they need is the chip
do something
what exactly
i do n't know
what happened
losing power
the laser drained it
be quiet
where 've you been
never mind that where are we now
we are in a dungeon
how do we get out
gimme a minute
looks like you can have all you want
i can always flush you down the toilet
keep thinking
i have been
i think you 're right
about what
dieter asked where i was
he expected me here
maybe someone was assigned to bring me here
rene
she works for them
now you 're too suspicious
you were the one who was always suspicious of her
i was wrong
she tried to help us get away
no
she just stayed with us
like she did all along
she is beautiful
you 've changed your mind
you 're a lucky man
yeah sure
she 's so lovely
it 's all my fault
i was wrong
you 're lovely
i do n't know how we 're gon na get out of this but we will somehow
i want you to know how much i appreciate what you 've done
i want to thank you for what you 've done
awwww
i mean it
no one else would have helped
i take it all back everything i 've said about you
do n't worry i owe you a lot
i 'm not gon na let us rot here
i 'm gon na find us a way out
i 'll get us out of here
do n't worry about me
you take this time for your own you two
..
in a way we 're like brothers
i ca n't have her
i want you to
that 's nice
what are you doing
sending what we know back to u.s.t. via satellite
joe go to what the hell does that mean
go toe
it 's some islands
joe what does some island have to do with this
it 's a mistake
it 's all we 've got
you just got a mickey
ryuji bandaio
grown near here
not that truth
are n't we all
sorry
it 'll remind me of you
works like a charm when i use it
you did n't say it right
does n't matter
what part what
the best part
she 'll love it
i 've seen that before
never had anyone actually do it
do what
what 'd you do
what is your name
do n't give her your name
no
oh i ca n't
good
we 've ruined his market in japan
where 's dieter
dieter
i'm
scared
look i do n't know how we 're gon na get out of this
i did n't do anything
i know we fight but i do n't mean it
you 're quite a guy
no one else could have dealt with this
nice
in my own way
i want you to know that
i love you
what kind of a deal
let us get to the border
then what
i knew you were trouble
trouble
is if we both get stuck here
what happened
joe 's escaped
dieter 's in him
in him
it 's a long story
ya hyutn slulptsa
they have stolen state property
what a nerve
i knew he was following us
he diverted attention exposed ryuji 's trap
rene
she found out what she could
and delivered him here
you did n't tell us you were coming
then how did you know
you 've cut your hair
i dyed it
we 're all getting old
pem115
newer more powerful design
how about a deal
we 'll let you go
you leave the pods and the pem
surveillance cameras
they took the tapes
you have nothing
we do n't even know where to start
what about these people
what do we do with them
we 'll have to let them go
surveilliance on them all
must be delayed effects of the drug
i 'll get him out of here
he work for us
ah
no sir
he was here for a job interview
what job
does n't matter
then put him away
sir
private clinic
best of care
total privacy
we 'll pay all costs
bit expensive sir
it 's the least we can do
after all it 's our responsibility
well i 'm glad to see you
sorry things broke up like that
it 's just money
hey sit in the car
i 'll get you a fee
make up for what you lost on the tour
yes
he 's not an ordinary man
enough romance
he's
more
somehow enhanced
he's
zxflbbgt
i do n't want to intrude
we insist
al viola
that name 's familiar
it is to me too
you remind me of someone
you from the west coast
... foreign service
and how do you service foreigners
well
i try to give them whatever they want
what brings you here
i came for a rest
as i imagine you did
to get away with it all
and
you know jan gruner
i think i 've heard of you
now remember your short term memory may have been affected
what
your memory
what about it
it may have been affected
oh
you may not remember things
what things
i do n't know
the last couple of hours
last few days
oh
that 's okay
when you do
do what
when you remember
remember what
anything
you call us right away
you got that
yeah
if i remember anything
i call
you
right
who
are you
sergeant finnegan
name 's right there on the card
are you sure you 're alright
how do i look
fine
you look fine
thanks
well
well what
we 're here
here
home
your home
the address on your form
oh
do n't you want to get out
oh
sure
why do n't you lie down until you feel better
i feel fine
you 'll feel better
i will
look we 'll bring your car home
just take it easy until the effects wear off
you need anything just call this number
al
the little man in my
head
i 'm not going anywhere until you get this guy out of my head
of course you 're not
we 'll take good care of you
ahhh
nothing
been complaning of hallucinations
not
complaining actually
been hearing voices
was quite excited when he came in
much better now thank you
just sit here quietly
see there 's nothing to worry about
just be my old self again
soon
sue who
you
him
ust
that rene
lovely girl
a killer
i noticed you staring
could n't help it
no offense
she 's not your wife is she
and you there are many places to get away
why here
a little voice in my head
you may you find all the solitude you want
thanks i appreciate that
how 's that trucklhouser beer
we have henekin kirin
very good sir
this sophistication ai n't tough
all it takes is a credit card
now you know what i know
sir
about cholesterol
you know what i know you 'd have the seafood
ahhh
good choice sir
the fresh tuna
yessir
very good sir
yes
what is it
what 's what
what do you want
nothing
what did you say
nothing
what
i said
i did n't say
anything
then who did
you did
joe no i did n't
you said something first
oh
and who is it
i did n't say anything
what do you do about what
... i 'm looking for someone
is someone else here
no
no one to speak of
i am confused
or maybe it 's you
i 'll be right there
where
dinner
tonight
oh
i ca n't
business
and you
... right here too
have n't seen you around
i ca n't do that
do what
let you leave without it
without what
what 's so funny
nothing
al
why do you talk that way
what way
like there 's someone else here
wait
what 's your name
... rene
you mean from it
yes of course
and you
i just work for the travel firm
you again
me still
they left you alone
i waited for you
why
... i
don't know
... ummm you really work for the foreign service
... naw
made that up
who do you work for
no one
no one at all
i 'm unemployed
who do you
trans ocean travel
is that ryuji
no
ryuji just hires us
hires you for what
to organize things
meetings and travel
whenever they come here i handle details
how often they come here
he likes the quiet
they were here last week
and you what do you like
that depends
joe
what happened to you
why 'd you run off
why did you leave
they left
i had to go with them
why did n't you tell me
why did you stay with me
wanted to get to know you
why
you seemed interesting
who else is interested in me
what do you mean
your friends did they ask about me
they kidded me a little
what did you tell them
there 's not much to tell
why did they leave
i do n't know ryuji said there was a change of plans
you work for ryuji
sometimes
i told you i did
were you working for him last night
last night
did he put you up to it
did he ask you to sleep with me
no he did n't do that
he did n't
no
who did
you did
i 'm not worried i 'm not going to eat it
this is a tough place to keep kosher
you 're leaving
food does n't agree with me
i 'm leaving too
why
this business is over
i 'm sorry
what will you do
go back to tokyo
try to get another tour
you're following gruner
i 'm just on vacation
now so am i
what 's so interesting about him
you know where he went
what 's he done
he stole something
from a friend of mine
he must be a good friend
we 're very close
what 'd he steal
a chip
goes in a computer
one chip
the most important one
can you help me find him
how do you know you can trust me
got to trust someone
i do n't know
he mentioned a city
what is it
hiroshima
get your things
where we going
beats me
this boat does n't go anywhere
just toots around the inland sea
must be a pick up a rendezvous
then where 's the chip
what
he plays it all the time
now what
we figure out if it 's in here
how
why do n't you get us some food
this may take some time
that must be him
water taxi
get us one
too late they wo n't come back out till morning
where what
where would you go to sell a chip
if gruner led us away who 'd he lead us away from
hong kong
what
dieter 's gone to shoot a still job
hong kong
wait a minute
how 'd you know dieter was coming here
i asked him
oh
chiang cho
... across the border
come on
that 's not this direction
it 's back the other way
you 've been there
i know the territory
you coming along
so do i.
this going to work
maybe they 're expecting gruner
i 'm gon na be him
he 's dutch
you ca n't even speak dutch
why not
can you
sure i can ca n't i
what happened
i ca n't fly it
what'd
you forget
are you alright
yes
no
i'm
okay
they ca n't do this
they ca n't hold us here
looks like they can
what did they do
they asked about you
what did you tell them
that i really do n't know
now what
they 'll listen to what we say in here
what
oh about dieter yes
it was him
gruner works for him
why
what a mess
you can say that again
what do we do
nothing we can do
what
they can hold us here forever
nobody knows about us
ca n't you do something
i encouraged you to come here
my fault as much as yours
i was
crazy
desperate
i took it out on you
i did n't mean it
i know what she sees in you
you 're kind and you 're brave
if i ever get out of you i 'll be glad to call you my friend
how
what
now what
i 've never met anyone like you
uh
wonderful
i know i 'm strange but in my own way i love you
i love you too
do n't worry
why not what are you going to do
escape
just like that
i 'll come back for you
are n't you a little optimistic
you son of a bitch
you conned me
you 're gon na laugh
kiss her you fool
her
it was me
he just told me how
i wish he could tell me now
if he was able what would he say
come on
that 's twenty feet high
like al says
"under stress the human body is capable of impossible feats
riuji
i told you i work for him
what is it
we 're not moving fast enough for him
he wants to apologise
he should do it in person
i mean ex person
yeah
i have to get away
i know a nice island
must be a fulfilling occupation
it keeps me busy
everybody always wants something
what could you find in this place
... piece of mind
excuse me
could have been drunk a little sooner but excellent
good character
what is it
is there anything else
a drink
water fountain 's through that door down the hall
thanks
wait
why
you ca n't take that
why not
the experiment
the danger
it 's alright
it is
it will be fine
you have another
just one
the back up
could i have it please
i ca n't get it out
it would take hours
that 's alright
just tear it apart
tear it apart
yes
ahhh
okay
mom
what are you doing here
leaving now go to sleep
all of you
right there
thank you
this the only spare
yes
the other working
perfectly
ow
it'l be alright
it will
it does n't hurt
no
screw the pem
what about al
poor bastard
it'l take months
so we better get started
what about al
hi honey
hi daddy
what 's new
ms. laufer gave me a star today
yeah
what for
for reading
that 's great
little early for cartoons is n't it
okay
sweetheart c'mon
c'mon
she was playing with my pooh doll again
here we go
deep breaths deep breaths
she was playing with the pooh doll
pooh 's dusty sweetheart
he 's dusty and you breathed him in okay
so what 's -- what 's happening to you now is
cells called mast cells told your lungs do n't breathe any more of that dust in
and the airways in your lungs are like branches
and when the branches close up you get an asthmatic attack
and we give you medicine and you get better
huh
okay
you 're better already are n't you
i 'll take some
instant rice
can i go over to janeane 's house
hey baby
what 's wrong
what 's that outside daddy
did you see somebody or did you hear them
i heard them
where
in the backyard
he 's into kind of little cars that
that remote control thing
yeah
alright we 'll do that tomorrow
mom
yes baby
there 's dad on tv
we 'll give you a heads up before we launch
how long
three hours
you got a deal
well are you or are you not charlie
you bet we are
and i ca n't talk to you now
we got ta hook up
sure
where
p.j. 's
i 'll be there
when 's your deadline
monday
push it
what
forget it
it 's a smear campaign charlie
it 's drawn from a selectively circulated
oh it 's real selective
about as hard to get a hold of as the manhattan phone book
well it 's authoritative and is overwhelmingly documented
and it 's bullshit
and if i 'm right are you going to put the journal 's reputation behind a story that 's going to blow up in your face
i 'll take a look at what you got
but i 'm not moving any deadlines 'cause you say so
are you all right
yeah
catch you later
these are their leads their sources
i want you to have your reporters
suein hwang and milo geyelin
have them make their own calls
they 'll find that these sources have a different story than the one that 's in the dossier
push the deadline charlie
i want you to get legal onto corporate confidentiality agreements
boundaries of their constraint
kentucky state law about
i want you to drop everything
okay
what does that do
what do you mean what 's it do
what i mean is like how does it cut through the confidentiality agreement
because he has to reveal it in a court of law
it 's on record it 's out
it 's no secret anymore
so how can they restrain his speech or retaliate
it 's out in the world
shit
oh we need cops on the street
we do n't need them on horses
i do n't know what he was thinking
oh for god 's sake what has this guy got a horse fetish
alright alright
get me to new orleans this afternoon
i 'll shoot the fucking thing myself
i ca n't get out of here til mid- morning
i 'll be in tomorrow night
listen could you call a number for me it 's in mississippi
okay
hold on a second
what is it
yeah
yeah sure
i 'll see if i can find him
hold on
yeah don 's looking for you
good
the sub heading is brown williamson has a 500-page dossier attacking chief critic
it quotes richard scruggs calling it the worst kind of an organized smear campaign against a whistle blower
can i go to dance tomorrow
i 'm better
... if you are then i 'll take barbara to soccer and take you to dance after
do you want more rice
maybe later
how about you
what are you cooking
i 'm cooking pasta primavera
oh i love that stuff
i heard wigand 's deposition got sealed
yeah they argued he was going to reveal the secret formula of kools to the world
sealed does n't hurt scruggs litigation and since we 're the only ones with the story i believe we 're sitting on an exclusive
tortious interference
sounds like a disease caught by a radio
lunch
since when has the paragon of investigative journalism allowed lawyers to determine the news content on 60 minutes
it 's an alternate version
so what if we have an alternate version
and i do n't think her being cautious is so damned unreasonable
so what are you going to do
well what do you think i 'm going to do
quit in protest
i 'm not going to do that
you 're taking no for an answer
no
i 'm not going to take no for an answer
no
then what are you going to do
i 'm staying right here
doing my job
fighting to get my show on the air
you do n't like it
hey i 'll tell you what
fire my ass
end up in a high profile lawsuit with lowell the first amendment martyr
i do n't think so
take a look at this
this is a summary of a dossier that 's being prepared
what the hell are you doing
what does it look like i 'm doing
i 'm editing
no not that
i 'm talking about the associated press
they got this story that we pulled this interview and they talked to mike and i. did you tell them that we were lying
no
i should have
i told them i disagreed with you mike and kluster that this segment is as good as the original
i 'm not lying for you
i 'm not gon na shut up for you
not on any of it
hey
i 'm not going to fire you okay
take a vacation
now
the new york times ran a blow by blow of what we talked about behind closed doors
you fucked us
no you fucked you
do n't invert stuff
big tobacco tried to smear wigand you bought it
the wall street journal here not exactly a bastion of anti capitalist sentiment refutes big tobacco 's smear campaign as the lowest form of character assassination
and now even now when every word of what wigand has said on our show is printed the entire deposition of his testimony in a court of law in the state of mississippi the cat totally out of the bag you 're still standing here debating
don what the hell else
do you need
there has been so much soul searching about this wigand i 've decided we should cut an alternate version of the show without his interview
so what happened to ms. caperelli 's checking with outside counsel first all that crap
that 's happening
and hopefully we wo n't have to use the alternate but we should have it in the can
i 'm not touching my film
i 'm afraid you are
no i 'm not
we 're doing this with or without you lowell
if you like i can assign another producer to edit your show
so now if you 'll excuse me gentlemen mr. rather 's been complaining about his chair again
as they start to leave
before you go
and what are you implying
i 'm not implying
i 'm quoting
more vested interests
persons who will profit from this merger
ms. helen caperelli general counsel of cbs news 3.9 million
mr. eric kluster president of cbs news 1.4 million
did you handle the round mr. wigand
yes i 'm afraid i did
that bullet was for a
38 caliber
do you own a
38
yes i do
a
38 target master
in my gun safe downstairs
a
45 gold cup
a
22 target pistol
so what
do you have a history of emotional problems mr. wigand
yes
yes i do
yes i get extremely emotional when assholes put bullets in my mailbox
you ca n't take that
it 's personal property
we have a search warrant mr. wigand
there 's been a death threat
... my files
personal correspondence
that computer has everything
you alright mr. wigand
debbie
hey lowell
oh bill
main justice is investigating a major new york bank
laundering narco dollars out of their mexico city branch
you want it for the evening news
what about you you got a crew already
i 'm gon na do a follow up
okay
catch ya later
shall i send for coffee
sorry i 'm late
no no we 're fine
are you sure
if this holds up and it very well may not mike
but if it did
and we aired this segment
and cbs was sued by brown williamson
i think we could be at grave risk
how grave
well at the end of the day
because of your segment
the brown williamson tobacco company
could own cbs
mike
mike
mike
mike
is cbs corporate telling cbs news do not go to air with this story
you 're getting ahead of yourself
we 're all in this together
we 're all cbs
we 'll find out soon
thank you gentlemen
hey lowell
how are you jim
hey listen i hear you guys are sitting on something sensational over there
hi baby
catch you later
how prominent
what kind of placement
oh c'mon lowell
this is the new york times
i do n't know
well until you do all i can tell you is what you already know
they will not air an interview
call me back in ten
hello
jim it 's lowell
here 's how it works
you ask me questions
i tell you if you 're wrong
okay
lowell
yeah
you 're sure you want to do this
why
hey it does n't work
you 've burned your bridges man
you ready
okay
about this whistle blower
did mike and don go along with the corporate decision
lowell
did i tell you you were wrong
no
i 'm assuming the cave in begins with the threat of litigation from big tobacco
are we talking
are we talking brown williamson here
i can take her
do n't you have to be at the office
is there any more rice
yes it 's on the stove
there 's a severance agreement
it includes cash payouts over time and continuing medical coverage
sure you do n't need anything
no thank you
what 's going on
i told him that you had an e mail death threat that said if you did n't shut the f up they were going to kill you
... taping
what are you taping
i 'm doing an interview
an interview
do you know what they will do to us
i thought
sorry
please do n't wash your hands in the sink
where should i wash them
use the bathroom
what 's the difference
that 's for food
i do n't think i can do this
i want to stand by my husband
i really do jeffrey
but i do n't think i can do this anymore
i am so sorry
can we talk about this when i get back
yes
jeffrey
thank you bob
who 's calling
my name 's lowell bergman
i 'm --
did you say berman
no bergman
b.e.r.g.m.a.n
i 'm a producer with 60 minutes
60 minutes
yeah
60 minutes the television show
yes
oh someone took a poll
are all things canadian boring
it 's stuart
he 's in mexico city
let me call you back
no classes this morning
will he go on camera and talk about the mexico city branch
two p.m. great
bye bye
... ignition propensity
you understand any of this
... no
this looks like a table of temperatures
who 's this from
... it 's anonymous
references to p.m. it 's got to be philip morris huh
i have to take a shower
what 's wrong
they 're killing the wigand interview
what
they 're pretending it 's process
bullshit it 's foregone
what are you and mike going to do
i 'm alone on this
oh baby
jeffrey wigand
jeffrey
i 'm lowell bergman i 'm from 60 minutes
you know you take the 60 minutes out of that sentence nobody returns your phone call
maybe wigand 's right
maybe i 'm hooked
what am i hooked on
the rush
60 minutes
what the hell for
infotainment
it 's so fucking useless all of it
so it 's a big country with a free press
you can go work somewhere else
free press
press is free
for anyone who owns one
larry tisch has a free press
get some perspective lowell
i got perspective
no you do not
from my perspective what 's been going on and what i 've been doing is ridiculous
it 's half measures
you 're not listening
really know what you 're going to do before you do it
yeah
... you fucked me
who is this
is it too late
no
no it 's okay
how 's -- how 's the new place
oh my god
you 're not even on this anymore
what do you care
jeff
wake the fuck up
everybody is on the line here
if they can catch you in a lie they can paint everything with that brush
do you understand
everything you say
has he decided to go public
because let me tell you we 've been doing this for three years now and we 've worked with a lot of corporate cases involving whistle blowers so we know
big tobacco will do everything in their power to stop him
so is your man truly committed
well actually no
well he 's on the fence
that 's the point
well we 'd certainly be interested in making his acquaintance but without knowing what he 's going to do
well would you want him to call you
or you want to call him
how do you want to do it
it would be better if he called us
yeah
alright
okay
thank you
yeah i 'm here
what chance is there of getting jeff 's interview on the air
... i 'd be lying to you if i did not tell you how important it was in the court of public opinion
... and i 'd be lying to you if i did n't tell you i 'm about out of moves dick
all right
see you
we 're there
good well ask him if arabic is his second language
do n't interpret that
hold it
hold it
hold it
slow slow
sheikh do you mind
if you would just turn your chair a little bit to face mr. wallace
... come in earlier on mike 's marine barracks line when he 's talking to sheikh mussawi
you eating with us
yeah
bring a tie so they 'll let us in the front door
he referred to this
the seven dwarfs
what seven dwarfs
the seven ceos of big tobacco
referred to this
said they should be afraid of him
i assume afraid of what he could reveal
now you tell me
what does this guy have to say that threatens these people
well it is n't cigarettes are bad for you
hardly new news
no shit
what 's this
thank you for saying that
do you think we could talk about the taping
tomorrow 's taping just so we can get it out of the way and order
yeah well questions will go toward what work you did there why you were fired
and others will deal
oh man
who are these people
ordinary people
under extraordinary pressure mike
what the hell do you expect
grace and consistency
it went great in mississippi mike
good
i think what we 're trying to tell you is that it happens all the time
this is a news organization
people are always telling us things they should n't
we have to verify if it 's true and in the public interest
and if it is we air it
after we corroborate it
that 's why we 've never lost a lawsuit and run a classy show
anything else
i discovered this
sec filing
for the sale of the cbs corporation to westinghouse corporation
what
lowell
put the corporation at risk
give me a fucking break
lowell
these people are putting our whole reason for doing what we do
on the line
lowell
what
i 'm with don on this
i 've been banished
in lieu of being fired
i took off on tisch
i took off on corporate
they 'll know they 're not going to see everything on sunday night
i do n't know
how does that get wigand on the air
do me a favor will you
spare me for god 's sake
get in the real world
what do you think
i 'm going to resign in protest
to force it on the air
the answer is no
i do n't plan to spend the end of my days wandering in the wilderness of national public radio
that decision i 've already made
yeah
you disappeared on me
how long you staying
i disappeared on you
alright
what did you think
i think it was a disgrace
mike
in my
you and i have been doing this together for fourteen years
that canada story
still interest you
everything interests me
c'mon it all worked out
you came out okay in the end
i did
what do i tell a source on the next tough story
hang in with us
you 'll be fine
maybe
coffee
yeah
thank you
how have you liked your stay
what i 've seen
i 've liked
please to explain why i should agree to interview
with pro zionist american media
because i think hezbollah is trying to broaden into a political party right now
so you care about what you 're thought of in america
and in america at this moment in time hezbollah does not have a face
that 's why
perhaps you prove journalism objectivity and i see the questions first
then i decide if i grant the interview
no
we do n't do that
you 've seen 60 minutes and mike wallace
so you know our reputation for integrity and objectivity
you also know we are the highest rated most respected tv magazine news show in america
tell him i will see him day after tomorrow
that 's good
that works
uh you know i want to ask you something
i know it sounds odd
but
who 's that
that 's room service
they usually knock first
come on in
over here please
i know what i have to know
just so i know you know when i talk to people in confidence it stays that way
how did a radical journalist from ramparts magazine end up at cbs
... but that 's as far as i go
far as you go where
this issue is a drop in the bucket
i can talk to you about what 's in here
but i ca n't talk to you about anything else
does n't cbs have confidentiality agreements mr. bergman
between journalists and management yes i believe they do
but i do n't take that seriously
where do you work
did work
did work
how much would i get paid
that you have to discuss with cbs business affairs
but for something like this i would say anywhere between 10 12 thousand
should i just take the documents now
if you want to do it
... protect your sources
you screwed me
you sold me out
what are you talking about
where are you
fuck you too
mrs. wigand how do you do
jump in quick c'mon
i 'm lowell bergman
we spoke on the phone remember
c'mere
i want to talk to you
good
i want to talk to you
what do
i did not burn you
i did not give you up to anyone
this is my house
in front of my wife my kids
what business do we have
to straighten something out with you
right here
right now
so you did n't mention my name
you have n't talked to anybody about me
why am i gon na mention your name
how did brown williamson know i spoke to you
how the hell do i know about brown williamson
it happened after i talked to you
i do not like coincidences
and i do n't like paranoid accusations
i 'm a journalist
think
use your head
how do i operate as a journalist by screwing the people who could provide me with information before they provided me with it
you came all the way down here to tell me that
no
i did not
big tobacco is a big story
and you got something important to say
i can tell
but yes
i did
i came all the way down here to tell you story no story fuck your story i do n't burn people
seven dwarfs
the seven ceos of big tobacco
they got up in front of congress that time
it was on television
... and swore under oath that they know nothing about addiction disease
it was on c span
yeah
okay so here you are
you go to work for tobacco
you come from corporate cultures where research really creative thinking these are core values
you go to tobacco
tobacco is a sales culture
market and sell enormous volume
go to a lot of golf tournaments
the hell with everything else
what are you doing
why are you working for tobacco in the first place
i ca n't talk about it
the work i was supposed to do
might have had some positive effect
i do n't know
it could have been beneficial
mostly i got paid a lot
i took the money
my wife was happy
my kids had good medical
good schools
got a great house
i mean what the hell is wrong with that
i 've always thought of myself
as a man of science
that 's what 's wrong with it
then
you 're in a state of conflict jeff
the new place
new
you okay
you know i was thinking of calling you tomorrow anyway
how are your kids handling the new house
good
you have kids
no you said you were going to call me tomorrow
so what about
oh yes yes yes i did
i wanted to talk to you
i wanted to hook up and talk to you
about what we were talking about in your car
... okay
makes you feel good
putting what you know to use
how 'd you know that lowell
it 's obvious is n't it
hello
you there
yeah
look thanks for talking
i 'm sorry i woke you up
it 's okay
what did you get us
tempura
excuse me
yeah
they 're terrorizing us
death threats
to my family
my kids
jeff call the fbi right away
they do this with impunity
jeff
they get to go home at night
what does it cost these people to do this to us
nothing
my girls are crying so fuck them
i want to tape
i 'm done thinking about it
good
but jeff
i 'll call them lowell
liane this is a preliminary
you did n't tell her we were taping
what did she think she was coming to new york for
... to talk about it
to think about it
i had a plan to ease her into it
but i really -- i did n't know how to do that
lowell i ca n't afford --
... they volunteered
a friend owns a large security company
i called richard scruggs in mississippi
i heard
i 'm going to be a witness for them in their litigation
so i 'm going to fly to pascagoula to give a deposition
i know
i 'm going to go there tonight
did you have a good day
you attract a crowd
yeah great
i heard about the kentucky gag order
i do n't know what to do
what 's changed
you mean
since this morning
no
i mean since whenever
oh you know what we do or do not need to know
since when have you become a media expert
what do you want to do lowell look up my ass too
i told the truth
everything
you
say
and i ca n't defend you man with one hand tied behind my back
because you keep from me
what they can discover
and they will discover everything
believe me
... i was young
i was young
confused
we did n't handle it the right way
she sued you for back payments of child support
she did not sue me
we had a dispute over money
i settled it she dropped the complaint
any other questions
yes
did you lie about being on the american judo team in the olympics
what
some public relations guy got a hold of a tape of an interview
where you 're saying you were on the american judo team in the olympics
what kind of shit is this
i was not on the team i sparred with the olympic team
okay
alright
the abc telemarketing company
abc
abc telemarketing company
a can opener
a 39.95 can opener
i canceled payment
it was junk
you ever bounce a check lowell
you ever look at another woman 's tits
you ever cheat a little on your taxes
whose life if you look at it under a microscope does n't have any flaws
that 's the whole point jeffrey
that 's the whole point
anyone 's
everyone 's
they are gon na look under every rock dig up every flaw every mistake you 've ever made
they are going to distort and exaggerate everything you 've ever done man
do n't you understand
what does this have to do with my testimony
that 's not the point
what does this have to do with my testimony
i told the truth
it 's valid and true and provable
that 's not the fucking point whether you told the truth or not
hello
i told the truth
i told the truth
i 've got to teach class
i 've got to go
i 've got to teach class
and i 've got to refute every fucking accusation made in this report before the wall street journal runs
i am trying to protect you man
you manipulated me into this
that 's bullshit jeff
you greased the rails
i greased the rails for a guy who wanted to say yes
i helped him to say yes
alright
you 're not a robot jeff
that 's all
you got a mind of your own do n't you
up to you jeffrey
that 's the power you have jeffrey
vital insider information the american public need to know
lowell bergman the hot show who never met a source he could n't turn around
i fought for you
and i still fight for you
you fought for me
you manipulated me
into where i am now
staring at the brown williamson building
it 's all dark
except the 10th floor
that 's the legal department
that 's where they fuck with my life
jeffrey where you going with this
so where you goin'
you are important to a lot of people jeffrey
you think about that
you think about them
did he hear you
you 're breaking up
i ca n't hear you
what about now
what
hello can you hear me now
what 's happening
he does n't seem to be listening
alright now listen to me
i want you -- i want you to tell him in these words get on the fucking phone
i ca n't say that
no you can
tell him to get on the fucking phone
just give me an example
for example
james burke the ceo of johnson johnson
when he found out that some lunatic had put poison in tylenol bottles he did n't argue with the fda
he did n't even wait for the fda to tell him
he just pulled tylenol off every shelf of every store right across america
instantly
and then he developed the safety cap
because look as a ceo sure he 's got ta be a great businessman right
but he 's also a man of science
he 's not going to allow his company
to put on the shelf
a product that might hurt people
not like the seven dwarfs
we have a couple
one 's hers one 's mine
everybody uses a different name
modern marriage
how 's liane
she 's okay
hold on a minute lowell
somebody
may be following me
i do n't know
they came on the property
what do you mean followed you
did you call the police
i do n't want to be paranoid
i mean maybe it 's a game
some kind of mind game
well what do you really think though
i do n't know what the fuck i really think
are they doing it
is some crank doing it
are they doing it to make me feel paranoid
are they doing it for real and do n't give a shit what i think
i do n't know
i do n't fucking know
well no look
i mean there was a footprint
forget it
it 's probably not important at all
you know i got a job now
i 'm teaching high school
japanese and chemistry
so what were you calling about
you called me
what are you talking about
someone put a bullet in my mailbox
and so i moved out
i see the girls a couple of days a week
where you staying now
our favorite hotel honey
i checked into room 930
odd choice
huh
jeff wigand michael moore
good to meet you dr. wigand
mike 's our attorney general down here
i was just explaining to jeff they got a kentucky court to issue a gag order to stop his deposition today
right
now they tried to get the mississippi court to honor it but the judge threw it out
however for you there is a more perilous effect to the kentucky gag order
dr. wigand you do understand what could happen do n't you
you heard mr. sandefur say before congress that he believed nicotine was not addictive
... i believe mr. sandefur perjured himself because i watched those testimonies very carefully
all of us did
there was this whole line of people
whole line of ceos up there all swearing
part of the reason i 'm here is i felt that their representation clearly misstated at least within brown williamson 's representation clearly misstated
what is common language within the company
we are in the nicotine delivery business
and that 's what cigarettes are for
a delivery device for nicotine
a delivery device for nicotine
put it in your mouth light it up and you 're gon na get your fix
you 're gon na get your fix
you 're saying that brown williamson manipulates and adjusts the nicotine fix not by artificially adding nicotine but by enhancing the effect of nicotine through the use of chemical elements such as ammonia
the process is known as impact boosting
while not spiking nicotine they clearly manipulate it
there 's extensive use of this technology know as ammonia chemistry
it allows for the nicotine to be more rapidly absorbed in the lung and therefore affect the brain and central nervous system
the straw that broke the camel 's back for me and really put me in trouble with sandefur was a compound called coumarin
when i came on board at b&w they had tried to transition from coumarin to a similar flavor that would give the same taste and had been unsuccessful
i wanted it out immediately
i was told that it would affect sales so i should mind my own business
i constructed a memo to mr. sandefur indicating i could not in conscience continue with coumarin in a product that we now knew we had documentation was similar to coumadin a lung specific carcinogen
and you sent the document forward to sandefur
i sent the document forward to sandefur
i was told that we would continue to work on a substitute we were n't going to remove it as it would impact sales and that that was his decision
in other words you were charging sandefur and brown williamson with ignoring health considerations consciously
most certainly
and on march 24 thomas sandefur ceo of brown williamson had you fired
and the reason he gave you
poor communication skills
and do you wish you had n't come forward
you wish you had n't blown the whistle
yeah there are times i wish i had n't done it
there are times i feel compelled to do it
if you asked me would i do it again
do i think it 's worth it
yeah i think it 's worth it
i would bet on it
the former executive has reason to bet on being sued for major cigarette manufacturers
you wish you had n't blown the whistle
there are times
i wish i had n't done it
but there are times that i feel compelled to do it
i 've -- if you asked me if i would do it again or if it 's -- do i think it 's worth it
yeah
i think it 's worth it
object to the form of the question
it acts as a drug on the body
object to the form
it acts as a
object
there an echo in here
your objection 's been recorded
she typed it into her little machine over there
it 's on the record
so now i 'll proceed with my deposition of my witness
does it act as a drug
dr. wigand
i am instructing you
not to answer that question in accordance to the terms of the contractual obligations undertaken by you not to disclose any information about your work at the brown williamson tobacco company
and in accordance with the force and effect of the temporary restraining order that has been entered against you to by the court in the state of kentucky
that means you do n't talk
mr. motley we have rights here
oh you got rights and lefts
ups and downs and middles
so what
you do n't get to instruct anything around here
this is not north carolina not south carolina nor kentucky
this is the sovereign state of mississippi 's proceeding
wipe that smirk off your face
dr. wigand 's deposition will be part of this record
and i 'm going to take my witness testimony
whether the hell you like it or not
answer the question dr
hello
mr. scruggs jeff wigand
lowell bergman said i should give you a call
my co counsel ron motley and i have filed a lawsuit against the tobacco industry on behalf of the state of mississippi to get the state reimbursed medicaid costs for treating people with smoking related illness
if you 'd be interested in talking to us we 'd certainly like to talk to you
when should we do this
jeffrey says exactly what 's on his mind
most people consider what they 're saying
social skills
jeffrey just charges right ahead
now i know you understood the nature of the confidentiality portion of your severance agreement with brown williamson jeff
chapter and verse
yeah i know you do
you know i came up through sales
one of the reasons i was a great salesman was i never made a promise i could n't keep
i knew that if i ever broke my promise i 'd suffer the consequence
is that a threat
... we worked together for what was it three years
now the work we did here is confidential not for public scrutiny
any more than are one 's family matters
you threatening my family now too
now do n't be paranoid jeff
about the direction of research here we may have had our differences of opinion
research
you declare as a badge of honor you do n't even know what makes water boil
that 's why we hire scientists
okay
i do n't believe you can maintain corporate integrity without confidentiality agreements
i was paid well for my work
the health and welfare benefits are good
the severance package is fair
i have no intention of violating my confidentiality agreement and disclosing that which i said i would n't
i appreciate all that jeff
but upon reflection
we 've decided to expand our zone of comfort with you
yes
your husband did show remarkable foresight in taking those pictures
and yes absent a swimming pool the presence of the pool man would appear to be suspicious
but bonnie who is the real victim here
let me suggest the following
your husband who on a prior occasion slapped you -- beat you --
well i would n't say --
your husband who has beaten you -- repeatedly --
he --
please -- was at the time brandishing your firearm trying in his rage to shoot an acquaintance -- friend of long standing --
they hate each other --
so he says now
but if not for your cool headed intervention his tantrum might have ended this schmoe 's life and ruined his own
as for the sexual indiscretion which he imagined had taken place was n't it in fact he who had been sleeping with the pool man
miles how nice of you to see us -- may i introduce howard d. doyle of doyle oil
i told you we know each other baby
mr. massey represented my ex brother- in law
martin reiser
yeah
i know
leather would be more practical but whatcha gon na do
miles i know you 're busy and that you charge by the hour so i 'll come to the point
howard and i are planning to marry
sixteen years
howard jr. is fourteen and mandy must be what -- twelve
here
got pictures
honey i do n't think this is really relevant to
... and one day this sweet girl calls me asks me to lunch
just a shoulder to cry on deal
one thing leads to another and before i know it --
-- we realized we 'd always been very attracted to one another
baby
you are so hot
howard
oh
right
wo n't you have a seat
after you doll
and how is mrs. reiser
few suicide attempts little inpatient stint
naturally she misses her kids
six weekends a year and alternate yom kippurs seemed harsh to us but -- hey -- all 's fair
anyhoo she lives with a nurse takes her meds and goes to occupational therapy at a local sheltered workshop
so she 's uh flourishing
she makes felt wallets
got one right here
muh -- well uh -- huh
yep
my divorce just came through
shoulda called you
coulda cut a better deal
my wife still has health insurance and gets to see the children
but i do n't know
guess i 'm just a softie
after all amanda and me were together for -- what -- you 'd know better than me marylin
she was your best friend
i
uh guess congratulations are in order
well -- marylin and rex broke up and
no
i had no idea until after but --
what a touching story
you know miles after my wife -- wife 's mastectomy -- things were never the same
this might sound cold well maybe not to you massey but
i like my women with two boobs
harvard
whoa daddy
i just want to make sure that you both --
-- understand what you 're asking for here
the massey pre nup provides that in the event of a dissolution of the marriage for any reason both parties shall leave it with whatever they brought in and earned during
no one can profit from the marriage
the pre nup protects the wealthier party
well -- at the moment that 'd be me
and without it that party is exposed -- a sitting duck
no wriggle room
a wriggle room
maybe we should put that in the malibu house
screw the screening room
-- and we are sure
you 're in a rush
mr. dumbarton is yes
whoever sent you i 'll pay double
mr. dumbarton
is this mr. dumbarton
no
that 's his lawyer
triple
who 's the pigeon
you 're calling me a pestilence
that 's a hoot
i 'm sorry
that was unkind and -- but we changed our minds
did you really mean what you said on the phone
it was n't because you found out about rex
lemme tell you something
you are the pestilence
i 'm the exterminator
oh joe be happy for us
i 'll pay you the twenty thousand
well actually all whores worship the dollar if you want to get technical
shut up
i was a lawyer
just like you
and my clients
whores just like you
objection your honor
grounds
uh
poetry recitation
she got absolutely nothing
zero
zip
so
i wo n't be seeing her
your clients usually visit me after the settlement
not this one
not unless her hmo covers plastic surgery which incidentally she does not need
everyone needs plastic surgery
you need it
i do n't need it
you want botox
what the hell is botox
it 's a form of botulism
i just inject it into your forehead and it paralyzes your eyebrows so you ca n't raise them
why in god 's name would i want
no frown lines
new watch
it 's a lecoultre revers
you can flip the face and set it for two time zones
why would you need two time zones
you never leave beverly hills
it was a gift from a client
set one side for bel air
botox
christ
we had aspirations when we were in college
we did not
you were going to be a cardiac surgeon
i was going to clerk for the supreme court
i was going to play golf
you were going to have asian girlfriends
denial is not a river in egypt
you 're in check
i should be in therapy
do you think i 'm going to end up like herb myerson with a colostomy bag instead of a family
got any symptoms
yes
the inability to experience pleasure
oh
that
do n't waste time with your queen
what
the center counter defense
the thing is not to move your queen too early
she ca n't really love that idiot can she
what
marylin rexroth
she came into my office and signed a pre nup with howard doyle
doyle oil
a massey pre nup
she loves him
he 's the wrong man
miles
do n't waste time with someone else 's queen either
i 'm happy for you pal
thanks buddy
is she asian
asian
no
well
i 'm still
i have it
you have the pre nup
no
i have the ring
was i supposed to have a pre nup
no
you have the ring
wrigley has the pre nup
oh
i thought maybe -- gee
they wo n't get a conviction
the husband called it in as a suicide
the forensic guys were n't thinking murder
i 'm sure some of the evidence was compromised
it 's your move miles
i already made my move kenneth
my god
what
that was marvin untermeyer
yes
he was rex rexroth 's personal attorney
what do you mean was
rex just had a massive coronary
in the middle of a business meeting
he 's dead
i 'm sorry to hear that
but you were n't close were you
marvin says that rex 's will is four years old
he never redrafted it
yes
marylin
what have i done
i do n't know but do n't call me marylin
mrs. guttman you have testified that you were your husband 's sexual slave for thirty six years ever since you were married --
except for two years when he was in the navy in korea
prior to your marriage what was your profession
i was a hostess
for trans world airlines
what is your husband 's profession
he manufactures staples and industrial brad tacks
he 's very successful
so who 'd you hire
ruth rabino
you should have tried to get pregnant marylin -- solidify your position
no
you like kids
i ca n't have a baby with a man i do n't love
and i ca n't submit a child to divorce
it was like that scene in the godfather
frankie pentangeli is called to testify against the family
and he 's in court and he looks into the spectators gallery and sees his brother
they brought the brother from sicily
and frankie ca n't say a word
he ca n't testify
that 's what it was like seeing pat in there
i could n't even have ruth cross examine her
why do you think she did it
maybe she wanted a free trip to la
maybe they offered her money
massey is very seductive
who knows
maybe they put a horse head in her bed
i begged you to have a baby
in the godfather after the courtroom scene frankie pentangeli opens his veins in the bathtub
you 're vulnerable
it 's about time
you said yes did n't you
i said yes
it sounded like a bell
i 'll be right back
-- ruth rabinow this is rex rexroth
and you must be mrs. rexroth
and you must be mr. massey
how nice
positano is beautiful
remember when we were there rex
we stayed in the santo pietro
that hotel on the cliff
these are yours
not according to mrs. rabinow
i assume this is on rex
is n't everything
your husband told me you were beautiful but i was unprepared
dismiss your vows your feigned tears your flattery for where a heart is hard they make no battery
do you have a hard heart marylin
did you see the tape
not yet
see the tape
then we can discuss my heart
tell me mr. massey
what was your performance about this afternoon
what does your lawyer think
ruth says you 've been too successful that you 're bored complacent and you 're on your way down
but you do n't agree
how do you know
why would you be here
i told you
i was hungry
all right miles
let me tell you everything you think you know
i was married to rex for a long time
i was an excellent wife a partner a lover a hostess and a friend
there was only one thing i did wrong during the five years we were together
i got five years older
think he should be able to ditch me for that
he wants a reconciliation
see the tape
then we can discuss reconciliation
rex screwed up and i nailed his ass
now i 'm going to have it mounted and have my girlfriends over to throw darts at it
then i 'm getting on with my life
that 's all i 'm after
gotcha
what is it you 're after miles
oh i 'm a lot like you -- just looking for an ass to mount
well do n't look at mine
yes
i loved my husband rex
and you 've always loved him
and you hoped to spend the rest of your life with him
yes
why is that so difficult for you to understand
he 'll regret this
have you ever met mr. rexroth
oh for the love of
that is true is n't it miles
your pre nup is the best there is
that is correct
not to blow my own horn but they devote an entire semester to it at harvard law
-- we are both sure that 's what we want
absolutely
getting married
to him
he 's a sick freak
he 's passionate
passionate
he 's a pervert
he should have to register when he moves
all girls enjoy a little rough trade from time to time
marylin
listen to me
no
you listen to me
you busted me miles
you left me with nothing
what did you expect me to do
get a degree in counseling
write a book about table linen
because that 's what wives do when they get dumped and frankly i 'm not quite ready for that
but why him
we told you
we realized we 've always been in love
the massey pre nup has never been pene -- successfully challenged
so i hear
is that all
no that 's not all
to victory
i do n't feel victorious miles
i feel betrayed abandoned and humiliated
i have pictures of him with another woman
more pictures
my god marylin
you can open an erotic art gallery
did you invite me here to score some cheap laughs
no
just to comfort you and appreciate you --
you really think i engineered the whole thing
you think the marriage and the divorce was part of some scheme
you came here to celebrate because you think i 'm without morality or soul
you -- sound like my mother
hello
miles
yes
marylin
you 're right about me
i am worthless
i am nothing
i do n't deserve to live
marylin
when did i say
i do n't blame them for betraying me
i do n't blame rex or howard or my father
you see miles i 'm going to tell you something about me
something you may or may not know
i suck
screw you asswipe
marylin
forgive me but are you -- drunk
a little
you get out of the car
that 's right fuctard
i 'm talkin to you
you should n't be driving
where are you
i 'm on sunset
near the beverly hills hotel
wanna meet me for a drink in the polo
i live right near there
the 800 block of maple
come here
marylin -- come here right now before -- just come here
okay
should i stop at starbucks and pick up a blended for --
no
do n't stop
okay miles
you have a very nice home miles
very inviting
thank you
you have wonderful art
i love that lithograph
hockney
yes
i just got that actually
it was a gift
from a -- girlfriend
no
no
i do n't have a
no
it was from a client
no kidding
i 'll bet you have some very grateful clients
what 'd rex buy you
rex sent me two humidors full of pre- castro cubans
is that you
me
yes
oh
and that is -- mom
yeah
mom
mom and brother
you look like you were a very sensitive child
you have expressive eyes
hmmm
and your mother was very beautiful
she must be proud of you
she never particularly cared for me
she did n't love you
no
she loved me
she would never not love her son
she just did n't
i was n't her type
she said i was a very colicky baby
you know
difficult
not a good sleeper
did n't eat well
we got off to a bad start and she never seemed to recoup --
she held that against you
apparently she was very disappointed
boy
boy oh boy
and here i thought my mother was
your mother was
oh right
you met patricia
we 're damaged goods
no we 're not
we are miles
you know i 'm right
there 's something off about you and me miles
and maybe it is n't because of these women -- maybe they were just extremely insightful and recognized our deficiencies very early on
maybe
that is bullshit
mine is a bitch and yours is a psycho
i ca n't believe you 're saying this marylin
there 's nothing wrong with us
we 're attractive and charismatic and successful and
i like us
i 'm sorry miles
you should n't listen to me
i 'm sure you have a very fulfilling life
i 'd better go
i 'm depressing
no
thank you for the coffee
it 's very robust
i want to be your -- your wife
huh
no
that was n't right
i want you to be my wife
did you just propose to me
yes
i am
what else could those words mean
i believe we belong together and we can make one another happy
and we should be happy because happiness is better than the alternative which is -- just jump in any old time marylin
you have more experience at this than i do
yes
yes
yes you do have more experience
yes miles
i accept
you do
do you want me to sleep on it
no
do you want to sleep on it
no ma'am
i have been asleep all my life up to this moment
marylin will you marry me
yes
again
i do n't have a ring
i know
i have a watch
was n't she the judge at my divorce hearing
yes
short notice you know but i think there 's nice closure to it
hello judge muson
a pleasure as always
no
judge -- just a sec
but marylin if we sign it i ca n't hope to benefit from the marriage
oh miles
what i mean is your wealth is completely protected
but
i want this to be a marriage based on love trust and community property
that 's all i 've ever wanted
i 'm sorry
i 'm squishing you
i 'll move to the
no
stay
i want you close to me
this couch is wrong
it 's not a married couch
honey i could sit
in fact this is not a married house -- it 's a bachelor pad
hardly
you have six bedrooms
i know
but i 've converted most of them into ridiculous guy rooms -- a billiard room a card room a gym -- honey want you to go out as soon as you feel up to it -- and buy married things
woman things
personalize it
marylinize it
make this your house
here 's my card
spend as much as you want
we get mileage
well i suppose i could girly it up for you with a little fortuny and some passementerie --
good
are those foods
fabric and fringe
exactly
and then -- maybe -- not right away -- there 's a room right off the bedroom -- it would be perfect for a nursery
it 's a walk in humidor right now -- but if i took out the refrigeration unit --
miles
i think a nursery should be right off the master suite
my parents put mine in the guest house
apparently they did have a fisher price intercom but my mother turned it off when i was seven months old because i was so --
miles
i have a very good relationship with all the salesmen
i can return everything
can you marylin
can you return the trust
can you return the hopes
the dreams
can you just
send it all back for store credit
miles
you 're scaring me
i 'm sorry darling
i love it
it 's chic and timeless and elegant and eclectic and
it 's you marylin
it is you
well
well
well
look who made bail
may i come in
i do n't know
maybe i should grab my mace
i 'm a civil attorney
i have little experience with the criminal mind
i 'd just like to pick up a few of my things
i do n't believe you have things
on the contrary
we 're married and we have no pre nup so a case could be made that everything in here is mine
comfy
what do you want
i want to nail you ass
are you threatening me because i 'm sure that 's a violation of the terms of your bail
i 'm reporting you to the irs
the irs
they owe me
i 'm expecting a refund
i 'm clean with the irs
i 've reported every dollar i 've ever made
try again girlfriend
i 'm not talking about dollars studmuffin
i 'm talking about --
stuff
got a light
what kind of stuff
arty farty stuff
lithographs and pre castro cubans
watches and mileage on private jets
stuff miles
stuff you get from grateful clients
those are gifts
salary
unreported income
by the way what time is it on bellagio road
you ca n't prove anything
i do n't have to
that 's what the irs guys do
and they do it with great zeal
see they work at these tortuous civil service jobs and when five hundred dollar an hour boys like you take their trade out in luxury goodies these saps feel
well they feel like saps
and they feel bitter and they feel vengeful and they feel wrath
what is this
a romeo and julieta
you 're out of your league marylin
rexroth was a primate
i 'm a professional
i know
so am i right
and so is agent wilson of the internal revenue service
he 's a dedicated underpaid graduate of southwestern university -- very tenacious and never more so than when he 's dealing with an unscrupulous colleague
i think it 's only fair to warn you i 'm going to file an action miles
and after a decent interval i plan to have ruth seek an injunction that will forbid your approach within 500 feet of my house
meaning my house
i believe the residence will be part of the settlement
did our marriage ever mean anything to you
drop the bogus forgery charge and i 'll forget about your generous friends slash clients
that 's blackmail
that 's marriage
hello
marylin
miles
miles
where have you been
i 've been trying to get in touch
you have to leave the house immediately
i will miles
i will leave
but miles --
no buts
now
out
just listen to me
i 'm sorry miles
it 's true that my initial intention was to
please
leave the house
i fell in love miles
so did i. now pack up a few basics and --
you do
you do love me
it 's a no go joe
marylin
it 's okay joe
marylin
run
i 'll distract him
i 'm not leaving you
i took self defense
hello marylin
hello miles
hard to believe this is the way it will end up for us
it 's not something i wanted either
but then -- i guess -- something inside me died when i realized that you 'd hired a goon to kill me
yes
i know
it 's exactly how i felt when i realized you 'd hired the goon to kill
you wounded me first marylin
your forgetting rex rexroth
you 're forgetting howard doyle
forgery
fraud
income tax evasion
murder
murder
i do n't see how we can ever find our way back from
pre castro
fine
they were created during a dictatorship
what if something happened to you
what would i tell little gus when he asked what was my daddy like
sweet
i thought so
rex
get away from the door
look marylin ca n't we have a civilized discussion about this
we are
and it 's winding down
but marylin you know a divorce would ruin me right now
everything i have -- everything we have -- is tied up in my business
the business is my entire life
are you forgetting about the atcheson topeka and the santa fe
marylin
rex
go away
i do n't want to have to sic the dogs on you
dogs
hello rex
marylin
are you alright
you lost weight
my whole metabolism is -- off
do you need a tagamet
you have some
i was devastated
of course
thank you mrs. rexroth
who 's that
jesus
is this a lover
please
forgery and fraud
you used his credit card
he told me to -- he said he wanted me to --
quite a little shopping spree
how do you spend six figures in less than six hours
oh never mind i 've seen it before
i 've seen everything
do you think he set me up
do you think that was his intention
like i know his intention
or yours for that matter
i should join sam
i 'm too old for this bullshit
he never even asked
he just assumed --
he was right was n't he
so
now what
now
well marylin now you cut a deal or find out how jean harris made it work for her
you want to come out to the beach house tomorrow
i did n't know barry had a beach house
neither did i until my lawyer found it -- quite a paper trail -- he had it in the dog 's name
she 's a legend
did n't she do kravis or a pearlman
she definitely did a factor
she did a harriman
wow
in the words of my private investigator we 're going to nail his ass
miles massey
of massey myerson
do you know him
by reputation
he got ann rumsey that cute little island of george 's
who 's she
now
she 's a night manager at mcdonalds
i do n't know what his game is
he dismissed every one of ruth 's proposals
and sarah we were n't unreasonable
well what does he want
i do n't know
ruth kept her cool but i could tell she was surprised
he has a reputation for being tough
lilly 's up
oh god
every week --
i 'm dying
anyway even rex seemed perplexed by his intransigence
if i did n't know better i 'd swear massey had some personal investment in my ruination
so where are you now
well if he continues to maintain this position -- we 're in court
shit
get this
he called and invited me to dinner
that stinks
they left you with absolutely nothing
it makes you wonder about the entire legal system
like rodney king
they bought her speech
if i was only in it for rex 's money he should n't have to give me any
nothing specific but i 'll have my own place soon
so marylin
is that what you said when you were a little girl
probably
every woman in my life was divorced at least twice
what was i supposed to say
anthropologist
you 're not
no
i 'll see some blood before this is over but it wo n't be mine
sarah sorkin
ramona barcelona -- this is miles massey
hello miles
i ca n't do this anymore
let 's get some lunch
what about rugs
i thought we were stopping at mansour
right
what
he 's not what i expected
he 's very -- he 's so -- happy
but you 're going through with it
yes yes it 's just -- you know i 've never been the first wife
rex was married before me
so what
miles is different
he 's still so idealistic
well that 's about to change big time
he has no cynicism or anger
for once i 'm not the repository of rage at some other woman
soon you 'll have your own rage
i guess
-- is not a challenge
i need something i can sink my teeth into professionally speaking
he would invite these girls home from the staple factory to our condominium in palm springs
he had a device he called the intruder
wait
i know you
yes
you 're miles massey
you probably do n't recognize me
the drugs made me put on weight and grow facial hair
excuse me
you ruined my life you sonofabitch
gimme those
yes i know howard doyle
he tricked you
with a phony wife and a fake pre nup
howard doyle
he got you
you married marylin did n't you
you thought she had money
ha ha ha
howard doyle made you think that because of what you did to me
and to marylin rexroth
yeah
i heard all about it
my brother howard doyle got you
neener neener neener
herb wants to see me
when you have a moment
mr. massey --
please
no calls
i 'm feeling very fragile
i 'm sorry mr. massey but i felt certain you 'd want to know -- marylin rexroth wants to see you
marylin rexroth
when does she --
she 's here now
so ruth
how 's sam
sam is sam
he 's taking up fly fishing
he 's in a yert in montana
a yert
ruth is a living legend rex
at a time when most women are in boca having early bird specials -- she 's working so her husband can be in montana
in a yert
-- so much for the icebreakers
what 're you after ruth
my client is prepared to settle for fifty percent of the marital assets
why only fifty percent ruth
why not ask for a hundred percent
oh brother
here we go
why not a hundred and fifty percent
yes
maybe you 're right miles
maybe we 're being too conservative
seventy five percent
are you familiar with kirshner
kirshner does not apply
kirshner was in kentucky
... arty farty
rephrase
mrs. rexroth have you ever been in love
he divorced his wife -- he married marylin -- he divorced marylin -- and he -- remarried his wife
what kind of sick --
marylin was friends with howard and amanda doyle
they do n't like the way you operate
they helped her
he never ate the pre nup did he
i have no idea what howard doyle eats
i 'm not a damn dietician
did marylin end up with money
she 's your wife
why do n't you ask her
anyway i assume she signed the highly over rated massey pre nup
i do n't have a pre nup
... the fault dear brutus is not in our stars
do n't give me that crap
that 's my crap
and it 's good
i 'll have you suspended
i 'll have you disbarred
do n't threaten me miles
i did nothing illegal
... why did she do it ruth
why
that 's attorney client privilege
sorry miles
but as a great and clever man once said what 's good for the goose --
where does that leave us
we 've outlined a settlement
mr. rexroth
rex please
miles massey
please sit relax and consider this office your office your haven your war room -- for the duration of the campaign
thank you
now rex
... well my wife has me between a rock and a hard place
that 's her job
you have to respect that
when i first met marylin -- well we were crazy about each other
not emotionally of course
we just could n't keep our hands off each other
mm
but then
but then
what 's kirshner
please -- let me handle this
okay ruth forget kirshner -- what 's your bottom line
i think that went as well as could be expected
she always looked out for me
and she had private investigators assisting her
she brought my digestive enzymes
in anticipation of making you sick
maybe i should reconsider my
wait
he wants to give her
nothing
and she has
video
what the fuck
wrigley
sorry
sometimes i have serious doubts about you
i am very sorry
am i mentoring the wrong mentee
no
you 're not
i could be mentoring kramer
kramer clerked for scalia
what the hell is wrong with you
i ca n't help it
even with the business we 're in i -- it gets me every time
it 's so -- optimistic
is she going through with it
what do you think
what are they
berry spoons
spoons
honestly wrigley i 'm surprised at you
what is this
some martha stewart suggestion
those are the most cockamamie things i 've ever --
miles -- why so angry
i 'm sorry i 'm late
i was having lunch with ruth rabinow 's assistant
guess what
marylin rexroth is divorced
ha
... and i hear she 's richer than croesus
ah but is she richer than mrs. croesus
she could buy and sell you ten times over
she deserves every penny
they pay great athletes a fortune
well marylin rexroth is an athlete at the peak of her power
get me marylin rexroth doyle
what
she owes me a meal
i 'd stay away from her miles
i know you would wrigley
but would kramer
yes
it 's for your protection sweetheart
you 're the one with the -- the
-- the coin
extinguish
should we counsel fear -- or trust
should we seek to destroy -- or to build
should we meet our clients problems with cynicism -- or with love
now mrs. banderas
what is your relationship to mrs. rexroth
we do n't have much of a relationship anymore
i have n't seen her since before she married rex
we had some very nice times prior to that
we were quite close
and how would you define your relationship to mrs. rexroth
you know -- you are her
mother
hi sweetie
hard to believe i know
i 'm sure you are frequently mistaken for sisters
no
i have n't
but i 've been out of town
hello rex
hello there
you were never invited to meet your son in law
no
uh uh
i do n't think so
hmm
no
well
no
did you know mrs. rexroth was married
of course
of course she was married
what else would she be
single
i do n't think so
let me tell you something about patty
who 's patty
oh
that 's her name
patricia
like mine
i was pat and she was patty
but she changed it after seeing some like it hot
to marylin
after marylin monroe
i see
and what were you going to tell us about patty slash marylin
when she was a tiny girl
and people asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up
she never said the usual things little girls say -- like -- nurse -- ballerina -- anchorwoman
she always said -- when i grow up i want to be divorced
george was so impressed he hired him when he divorced his second
muriel rumsey
it 's not so bad these days
kids like joint custody
two sets of toys
maybe next time
thorstenson gieselensen
he just separated from his third
he 's in fish
he is fish
she 's keeping his name
and one of his planes
and all seven of his children
and only two are hers
that does n't make sense
it 's like punishing you for being goal oriented
well you can live here as long as you want
do you have any plans
we ca n't do the impossible mr. andrews
what i 'm asking is n't impossible
my daughter is somewhere between here and miami
i want her found
i 've put extra men on all along the way
it 's not enough
are you certain she 's not with king westley
no
he 's been trailed twenty four hours a day since this thing started
he ca n't even get a phone call we do n't know about
i 'm worried lovington
after all something might have happened to her
ohmary
yes sir
how is she
whyuhshe 's all right sir
what 's the matter
anything wrong
oh no sir
no different than
yes
i know
still in the dumps huh
yes sir
if you 'll excuse me sirshe sent me for a drink
andrews stands a moment thoughtfully and then starts up the stairs following which the scene dissolves to the upstairs corridor in front of ellie 's door
andrews enters and knocks several times
receiving no response he gingerly opens the door
ca n't you get them to go any faster
this dissolves to a deserted road peter at the wheel of his car
his high spirits find expression in his efforts to sing
i found a million dollar baby
yeah but i do n't like the idea of walking in on your jamboree
just between you and methose things give me a stiff pain
you need n't see anybody
you can come directly to my study
i 'd appreciate it very much if
nono
what the deuce do i want to
i sold some drawers and socks too i 'm throwing those in
and this is what you wantthirty- nine dollars and sixty cents
why not
i 'm not charging you for the time i wasted
yes i knowbut
what 's the matter
is n't it cheap enough
a trip like that would cost you a thousand dollars
let me get this straight
you want this thirty nine sixty in addition to the ten thousand dollars
what ten thousand
the reward
who said anything about a reward
i 'm afraid i 'm a little confused
you see i assumed you were coming here for
all i want is thirty nine sixty
if you 'll give me a check i 'll get out of this place
it gives me the jitters
you 're a peculiar chap
we 'll go into that some other time
the average man would go after the reward
all you seem to
listen did anybody ever make a sucker out of you
this is a matter of principle
something you probably would n't understand
when somebody takes me for a buggy ride i do n't like the idea of having to pay for the privilege
you were taken for a buggy ride
yeahwith all the trimmings
now how about the check
do i get it
here you are
do you mind if i ask you something frankly
do you love my daughter
a guy that 'd fall in love with your daughter should have his head examined
that 's an evasion
she grabbed herself a perfect running mate
king westley
the pill of the century
what she needs is a guy that 'd take a sock at her every daywhether it 's coming to her or not
if you had half the brains you 're supposed to have you 'd have done it yourselflong ago
do you love her
a normal human being could n't live under the same roof with her without going nuts
she 's my idea of nothing
i asked you a question
do you love her
yes
but do n't hold that against me
i 'm a little screwy myself
what 's this about not eating
i do n't want to eat
and there 's one more thing i do n't want
definitely
that 's to see you
know what my next move is
no more cigarettes
why do n't you put me in chains
i might
all right
put me in chains
do anything you want
but i 'm not going to eat a thing until you let me off this boat
come on ellie
stop being silly
you know i 'm going to have my way
i wo n't stand for it
i wo n't stand for your running my life
why do you insist on it
you ought to know why
because
yes
i know
because i 'm your daughter and you love me
because you do n't want me to make any mistakes
because
because marrying that fool king westley is
you 're wasting your time
i 'm already married to him
not so far as i 'm concerned you 're not
yes
smart are n't you
so subtle
if gandhi had a chef like paul it would change the whole political situation in india
you ca n't tempt me
do you hear
i wo n't eat
please
i ca n't fight on an empty stomach
remember what napoleon said
i hope you 're not comparing yourself to napoleon
he was a strategist
your idea of strategy is to use a lead pipe
where are you taking me
south america
south america
we leave miami in an hour
soon 's we get some supplies aboard
you 'll have a corpse on your hands
that what you 'll have
i wo n't eat a thing while i 'm on this boat
in that event we wo n't need so many supplies
what do you expect to accomplish by all this
i 'm already married
i 'll get it annulled
you 'll never do it
you ca n't do it
i 'll do it if it takes every penny i 've got
i 'll do it if i have to bribe that musical comedy justice of the peace
i 'll do itif i have to prove that you were dragged in staggering drunk
you probably were
mmmmmm
this filet mignon is divine
what 've you got against king westley
nothing much
i just think he 's a fake that 's all
you only met him once
that was enough
do you mind handing me the ketchup
you talk as if he were a gigoloor something
never mindi'll get it myself
gigolo
why you took the word right out of my mouth
thanks
he 's one of the best fliers in the country
right now he 's planning a trip to japan
you 're going to finance him i suppose
why not
look what he 's doing for aviation
it takes courage to do what he does
and character
at least he 's accomplished something worthwhile
i suppose you 'd like to have me marry a business man
well i hate business menparticularly if you 're a shining example
ellie
oh hello dad
i knocked several times
sorry
must have been day dreaming
well everything 's set
creating quite a furor too
great stunt king 's going to pull
stunt
landing on the lawn in an autogyro
oh yes
i heard
yes
personally i think it 's silly too
what 's the matter ellie
what 's wrong
nothing
you 've been acting so strangely since you returned
i'mi'm worried
i have n't bothered to ask you any questionsi is n't all this what you wanted
you have n't changed your mind about king have you
oh no
if you have it is n't too late
you know how i feel about him
but i want to make you happy
you gave me such a scareiwhen i could n't find you
you know the old pump is n't what it used to be
sorry dad
i would n't hurt you for the world
you know that
i have n't seen you cry since you were a baby
this must be serious
where 'd you meet him
on the road
now do n't tell me you fell in love with a bus driver
no
who is he
i do n't know very much about him
except that i love him
well if it 's as serious as all thatwe'll move heaven and earth to
it 'll do no good
he despises me
oh come now
he despises everything i stand for
he thinks i 'm spoiled and pampered and selfish and thoroughly insincere
ridiculous
he does n't think so much of you either
well
he blames you for everything that 's wrong about me
thinks you raised me stupidly
fine man to fall in love with
he 's marvelous
well what are we going to do about it
where is he
i do n't know
i 'd like to have a talk with him
it 's no use dad
i practically threw myself at him
well under the circumstances do n't you think we ought to call this thing off
no i 'll go through with it
but that 's silly child
seeing how you feel why
it does n't matter
i do n't want to stir up any more trouble
i 've been doing it all my life
i 've been such a burden to youmade your life so miserableand mine too
i 'm tired dad
tired of running around in circles
he 's right that 's what i 've been doing ever since i can remember
yes i guess i have
i do n't want to hurt anybody any more
i want to get away from all this front page publicity
it suddenly strikes me as being cheap and loathsome
i ca n't walk out on king now
it 'll make us all look so ridiculous
besides what difference does it make
i 'll never see peter again
is that his name
yes
peter warne
peter warne
why
do you know him
oh nono
you have n't heard from him have you dad
why no
do n't be silly
oh please dad
looks like that was his only interest in me
the reward
i 'm sorry you read it
are you going to see him
i suppose so
certainly
pay him off
he 's entitled to it
he did an excellent job
kept me thoroughly entertained
it 's worth every penny he gets
i 'll be going
ellie swallows her drink and starts pouring herself another as king enters
well if it is n't the groom himself
you 're just in time king
might have been able to help if it were n't for you
i 've been watched so closely i
yes
i know
well you can help now
i issued a statement yesterday that i 've withdrawn my objections
begging her to come home
i have n't heard from her
apparently she does n't trust me
why should she
after all
all right
that 's why i sent for you
there 's a room full of reporters out there
i want you to make a statementthat you 've had a talk with methat we 've reached an understandingthat if ellen comes home i wo n't interfere with your marriage
will you do that
if you really mean it i will
of course i mean it
i do n't care whom she 's married to as long as i can get her back
what a hell cat
no controlling these modern girls
they 're terrible
terrible
nothing terrible about her
she 's great
marvelous youngster
got a mind of her own
knows just what she wants
she 's not going to get it though
she wo n't get very far
has no money
what about that diamond wrist watch she had onshe can raise some money on that
holy smoke
i forgot all about that
send a wireless at once lovington detective agency
daughter escaped again
watch all roadsall transports and railroad stations in miami
have your new york office keep tabs on king westley
intercept all messages
want her back at all costs
i have n't changed my mind westley i want you to understand that
i do n't like you
i never have
i never will
that 's clear enough is n't it
you 've made that quite evidentwith all your threats of annulment
well it has n't bothered me for a minute
ellie and i got married because we love each other
and she 's proving it as far as i 'm concerned there 's going to be no annulment
you 've got a good thing and you 're hanging on to it huh
all right you win
i 'll just have to get used to you
i admit i 'm licked
but only because i 'm worried
i 've had detectives all over the country searching for her
i 've seen thousands of photographs
fortune tellers nuts every crank in the country has written me
have n't slept one night this week
if i do n't find her i 'll go crazy
why naturally i
naturally
you 're going to become a partner in a big institution
it 's one of the largest in the world
you talk as if
someday perhaps you might even take charge
ellie
oh she 's no responsibility
no
say listeni've devoted a whole lifetime trying to tame that wildcat
toughest job i ever tackled
ever hear of j.p. clarkson
biggest man in the country is n't he
well i tamed him
got him eating out of the palm of my hand
i 've browbeaten financiers statesmen foreign ministerssome of the most powerful people in the worldbut i 've never been able to do a thing with her
she 's been too much for me
i 'm glad you think it 's easy
now listenif you 'll do what i tell you perhaps i might develop a little respect for you
you never can tell
what would you like to have me do
sock her
try
do me a favor
try
it 's your only chance
and hers too
do that for meand maybe we 'll be friends maybe
do we understand each other
yes sir
fine
i 'll see you at the reception
you thought that up all by yourself huh
why it 'll make all the front pages
a spectacular thing like that
personally i think it 's stupid
but go ahead
have a good time
as long as ellie does n't object
oh no
she 'll be crazy about it
well see you later
i 'm going out on the lawn and arrange for landing space
goodbye
we 've done that already
yes of course
what happened
i have n't the slightest idea
here 's another wire sir
this one 's from charleston
checking every northbound train
also assigned twenty operatives to watch main highways
no success yet
will continue to do everything possible
signed lovington detective agency charleston
any others
yessir
there 's a report here from every state along the east coast
want to hear them
what do they say
they 're practically all the same sir
amateurs
they 're the finest detective agency in the country sir
we ai n't ate nothin' since yestidday
what happened to your money
ma spent it all for the tickets
she did n't know it was gon na be so much
we shouldn'a come i guess but ma said there 's a job waitin for her in new yorkand if we did n't go she might lose it
going without food is bad business son
why did n't you ask somebody
i was gon na do it but ma would n't let me
she was ashamed i guess
me
forget it son
i got millions
thanks
hey hey are n't you afraid you 'll burn out a tonsil
tonsil
me
no
me burn a tonsil
my tonsils wo n't burn as life 's corners i
all right let it go
turn
no thanks
we 're not hungry
oh i see young people in love are never hungry
no
young people in love are very seldom hungry
people in love are very seldom hungry
whadda you want
if you 'll be good enough to remove those newspapers i 'll have a seat
okay
okay
keep your shirt on young feller
just between you and me i never intended taking it off
what do you think you 're doing
huh
the papers
the papers
whadda you mean throwin 'em out
ohthe papers
that 's a long story my friend
you see i do n't like sitting on newspapers
i did once and all the headlines came off on my white pants
hey whadda you tryin to dokid me
oh i would n't kid you
on the level it actually happened
nobody bought a paper that day
they followed me all over town and read the news from the seat of my pants
what 're you gon na do about the papers
somebody 's got ta pick 'em up
it 's okay with me
i 'm not arguing
fresh guy huh
what you need is a good sock on the nose
look here partner
you may not like my nose
but i do
it 's a good nose
the only one i 've got
i always keep it out in the open where anybody can take a sock at it
if you decide to do it make sure you do n't miss
oh yeah
now that 's a brilliant answer
why did n't i think of it
our conversation could have been over long ago
oh yeah
you win
i beg your pardon
now listen
i 'm in a very ugly mood
i put up a stiff battle for that seat
so if it 's just the same to you scram
driver
tell that man not to drive so fast
are you talking to me
yes
tell that man to drive slowly
i do n't know what you 're raving about young man
and furthermore i 'm not interested
wellof all thewell maybe you 'll be interested to know your bag 's gone
oh my heavens
it 's gone
yeah
i knew you 'd catch on eventually
what happened
that cadaverous looking yegg who sat in front of us just up and took it
boy how that baby can run
what am i going to do now
do n't tell me your ticket was in it
no i 've got that all right
but my money
all i have here is four dollars
i 've got to get to new york with it
you can wire home for some money when we get to jacksonville
why noi yes
i guess i will
i 'll report it to the driver
about your bag i mean
no
i 'd rather you did n't
do n't be a fool
you lost your bag
the company'll make good
what 's your name
i do n't want it reported
why that 's ridiculous
they 're responsible for everything that
see here can you understand english
i do n't want it reported
please stay out of my affairs
i want to be left alone
a close up of peter shows him glaring after her
why you ungrateful brat
oh thank you
we 're in jacksonville are n't we
yes
that was foolish of me
why did n't you shove me away
i hated to wake you up
how about some breakfast
no thank you
thank you so much
remember me
i 'm the fellow you slept on last night
seems to me i 've already thanked you for that
what time is the next bus to new york
what 's the matter
would n't the old meanies wait for you
say how old are you anyway
do n't you know these busses work on a schedule
you need a guardian
what are you excited about
you missed the bus too
do n't tell me you did it on my account
hope you 're not getting any idea that what happened last night is you need n't concern yourself about me young man
i can take care of myself
you 're doing a pretty sloppy job of it
here 's your ticket
my ticket
i found it on the seat
oh thank you
must have fallen out of my pocket
if you promise not to snap my head off i 'd like to thank you
forget it
i did n't do it for you
his voice got on my nerves
here boy
what 'd you do
wire one of your friends for money
no
it 'd be useless
father'd get the wire before they would
of course i do
what do you mean
beat it
you have your nerve
here boy
a dollar sixty
you had four dollars last night
how do you expect to get to new york at the rate you 're going
that 's none of your business
you 're on a budget from now on
now just a minuteyou ca n't
shut up
hey brat
the view moves to the rear door of the bus
ellie stands on the bottom step
are you talking to me
yeah
come onwe're stopping here for the night
darn clever these armenians
yeah
yeah it 's a gift
i just had the unpleasant sensation of hearing you referred to as my husband
oh i forgot to tell you
i registered as mr. and mrs.
oh you did
what am i expected to doleap for joy
i kind of half expected you to thank me
your ego is colossal
yeah
yeah not bad
how 's your 's
chalk up one for your side
now listen you want to get to king westley do n't you
all right i 'm here to help you
what i want is your story exclusive
a day to- day account
all about your mad flight to happiness
i need that story
just between you and me i 've got to have it
now is n't that just too cute
there 's a brain behind that face of yours is n't there
you 've got everything nicely figured out for yourself including this
this
oh that 's a matter of simple mathematics
these cabins cost two bucks a night and i 'm very sorry to inform you wifey dear but the family purse wo n't stand for our having separate establishments
well thank you
thank you very much but you 've been very kind
oh yeah
it 's all right with me
go on out in the storm but i 'm going to follow you see
yeah
and if you get tough i 'll just have to turn you over to your old man right now
savvy
now that 's my whole plot in a nutshell
a simple story for simple people
now if you behave yourself i 'll see that you get to king westley if not i 'll just have to spill the beans to papa
now which of these beds do you prefer
this one
all right
i have an idiosyncrasy all my own
you 'll notice my coat came firstthen the tiethen the shirtnow according to hoyle,[5 the pants should come next
but that 's where i 'm different
go for the shoes first
after that i
smart aleck
do you mind putting out the light
not at all
who are you
who me
why i 'm the whippoorwill that cries in the night
i 'm the soft morning breeze that caresses your lovely face
you 've got a name have n't you
yeah
i got a name
peter warne
peter warne
i do n't like it
do n't let it bother you
you 're giving it back to me in the morning
pleased to meet you mr. warne
the pleasure is all mine
here
what is it
why it 's a toothbrush
thanks
youyou had it pressed
come on
hurry up
breakfast'll be ready in no time
why you sweet thing you
where 'd you get it pressed
listen brati'm going to count to ten
if you 're not out of bed by then i 'm going to yank you out myself
you 'll find the showersand thingsright back of the second cottage
outside
certainly outside
all the best homes have 'em outside
i ca n't go out like this
like what
like this
i have no robe
heretake mine
where 'd you say the showersand thingswere
heyyou're little are n't you
where is the shower
your hair 's cute like that
you should never comb it
i 'll find it myself
high time you got back
i met some very interesting women at the showers
we got to chatting about this and that
you know how time files
very outspoken too
said i looked funny
was n't that cute
hurry up and get dressed
why peter
do n't you want to hear about our lovely friends
if you did n't waste so much time on that wise cracking drummerwe'd have been through with breakfast by this time
yeah
i got a letter from aunt betty
she says if we do n't stop over at wilkes barre she 'll never forgive us
what are you talking about
do n't get excited peter
they just asked a civil question
there you go again
how many times did i tell you to stop butting in when i have an argument
well you do n't have to lose your temper
you do n't have to lose your temper
that 's what you told me the last time too
every time i step in to protect you
at the elk 's dance[7 when that big swede made a pass at you
he did n't make a pass at me
i told you a million times
oh so now i was drunk
well you were
i 'm sorry i did n't take another sock at him
yeah and gotten yourself arrested
aw nuts
you 're just like your old man
once a plumber always a plumber
there is n't an ounce of brains in your whole family
peter warne you 've gone far enough
i wo n't stand being insulted like this another minute
say you were pretty good
jumping in like that
got a brain have n't you
you were n't so bad yourself
we could start a two person stock company
if things get toughwe can play some small town auditoriums
we 'll call this one the great deception."[8
next week east lynne
after that the three musketeers
i 'd make a great d'artagnan
how about cinderellaor a real hot love story
no mushy stuff
i 'm running this troupe
oh you are
who made you the manager
i did
it was my idea was n't it
you always want to run everything
if you do n't like it you can resign from the company
i refuse to resign
then i 'll fire you
i 'll do all the parts myself
i better go over and see her
do n't be silly
nothing you can do
must be tough on an old womana trip like this
yes
poor old shapeley
you should n't have frightened him like that
at the rate he started he 's probably passed two state lines by this time
the exercise is good for him
yes i noticed he was getting a little fat lately
ouch
what 's the matter
i was never built for these moonlight strolls
why did we have to leave the bus
i do n't trust that chatterbox
first town we hit in the morning you better wire your father
not as long as i 'm alive
okay with me if you can stand the starvation diet
what do you meanstarvation
it takes money to buy food
why have n't you
not a sou
i had some before the fainting scene
you did n't give that boy all your money
i did n't give him anything
you were the big hearted gal
how about wiring your father now
never
i 'll get to new york if i have to starve all the way
must be some strange power westley has over you women
how do you expect to get there
to new york
yeah
i 'm following you
are n't you afraid of me
no
okay
hang on to these
i wish you 'd stop being playful
sorry
it 's the first time i 've ridden piggy back in years
this is n't piggy back
of course it is
you 're crazy
remember distinctly father taking me for a piggy back ride
and he carried you like this i suppose
yes
your father did n't know beans about piggy back riding
my unclemother 's brotherhad four children
and i 've seen them ride piggy back
i do n't think there 's a piggy- back rider in your whole family
i never knew a rich man yet who was a good piggy back rider
that 's silly
to be a piggy backer it takes complete relaxationa warm heartand a loving nature
and rich people have none of those qualifications i suppose
not a one
you 're prejudiced
show me a good piggy back rider and i 'll show you somebody that 's human
take abraham lincoln for instancea natural piggy backer
where do you get off with your stuffed shirt family
why your father knew so much about piggy back riding that he
if you 're scared it scares the hunger out of you
not if you 're more hungry than scared
all right
you win
let 's forget it
i ca n't forget it
i 'm still hungry
holy smokes
why did i ever get mixed up with you
i 'll get my clothes all wrinkled
well take them off
what
all right
do n't take them off
do whatever you please
but shut up about it
what 's the matter
oh peter
what 's got into you
oh peter
i was so scared
i was n't gone more than a minute
just went out to find you something to eat
knowbut
here
eat your head off
i do n't want it now
thought you were hungry
wasbut
but what
was so scaredthat it scared
holy jumping catfish
you can drive a guy crazy
sure
what
nothing
nothing you 'd give two cents for
try me
i am
i only work when i have to
two years ago i got a notion and went to china
there was a war going on
swell
after a while it got stale
i went down to tahiti
just lay on the beach for six months
what could be sweeter
does n't sound very exciting
what are you thinking about
by a strange coincidence i was thinking of you
really
yeah
i was just wondering what makes dames like you so dizzy
what 'd you say we 're supposed to be doing
hitch hiking
well you 've given me a very good example of the hiking
if it 's just the same to you we 'll sit right here till they come
got a toothpick
no
but i 've got a penknife
hayin my teeth
but the thumb always works
different ways to do it though
depends on how you feel
for instance number one is a short jerky movement that shows independence
you do n't care if they stop or not
'cause you got some money in your pocket see
clever
number two is a wider movementa smile goes with that onelike this
that means you got a couple of brand new stories about the farmer 's daughter.[12
you figured that all out yourself huh
oh that 's nothing
now take number three for instance
that 's a pip
it 's the pathetic one
when you 're brokeand hungryand everything looks black
it 's a long movement like this with a follow through
amazing
hm
yeah but it 's no good if you have n't got a long face with it
here comes a car
now watch me
i 'm going to use number one
keep your eye on that thumb baby and see what happens
something must have gone wrong
i guess i 'll try number two
when you get up to a hundred wake me up
i guess maybe i wo n't write that book after all
yes
but look at all the fun you had
mind if i try
you
do n't make me laugh
you 're such a smart aleck
nobody can do anything but you
i 'll show you how to stop a carand i wo n't use my thumb
what 're you going to do
mind your own business
you might give me a little credit
what for
i proved once and for all that the limb is mightier than the thumb
why did n't you take all your clothes off
you could have stopped forty cars
we do n't need forty cars
what were you going to do
gold dig him for a meal?[13
why not
i 'm hungry
eat a carrot
never
i 'm going in and ask him
if you do i 'll break your neck
oh peter
what happened
are you all right
come onget in
oh you 've been hurt
there 's a cut on
come on
come on
what happened
just a road thief
picks people up and runs off with their stuff
what a racket
what 'd you give him for the car
a black eye
yes
you 'll have a great story wo n't you
yeah swell
thank you
am i going to see you in new york
nope
why not
have n't you ever wanted to fall in love
me
yes
have n't you thought about it at all
seems to me you could make some girl wonderfully happy
maybe
suresure i 've thought about it
who has n't
if i ever met the right sort of a girl i 'd yeah but where you going to find hersomebody that 's realsomebody that 's alive
they do n't come that way any more
better go back to your bed
i love you
you 're forgetting you 're married
i do n't care
i love you
nothing else matters
we can run away
everything'll take care of itself
please peter
you ca n't go out of my life now
i could n't live without you
oh peter
i hope you got your money
you bet i did
congratulations
same to you
why do n't you stay and watch the fun
you 'll enjoy it immensely
i would
but i 've got a weak stomach
compared to you my friend shapeley 's an amateur
whatever gave you an idea you can get away with this
you 're positively the most conceited
hey wait a minute
let 's get something straightened out right now
if you 've any peculiar ideas that i 'm interested in you forget it
you 're just a headline to me
a headline
you 're not a newspaper man are you
i 'll bet you 're in an awful hurry to get back to new york are n't you
goodnight mr. warne
onetwothreefourfive
why you bully
i believe you would
sixseveneightnine
i 'm out
i 'm out
no it is n't
i 'm hungry andand scared
you ca n't be hungry and scared at the same time
well i am
comical part of it is it is n't what you want at all
in a couple of weeks you 'll be looking for the nearest exit
people like you spend all your life on a merry go round
i guess that 's what makes you so dizzy
you 're always chasing after something
at least you think you are
truth is you 're just running away
from yourself mostly
'cause you 're miserable
you hate yourself
the world 's full of people like you
do n't know what they want
do you know
i just want to be let alone that 's all
life 's swell if you do n't try too hard
most people want to get a strangle hold on it
they 're not living
they 're just feverish
if they did n't get themselves all balled up with a lot of manufactured values they 'd find what they want
peace and calm
when you get right down to it what 's all the shootin for will you tell me
after all you can only eat three meals a day only sleep in one bed right now that hay feels pretty good to you does n't it
sure it does
'cause you were tiredand it 's the only thing around
you sound like a hobo
is that the walls of jericho going up
yep
the walls of jericho
no harm in your coming to see us
not interested
wo n't i ever see you again
how are you ellie
are you happy
happy
why should n't i be happy
i 'm getting the handsomest man in captivity
here you are king
let 's drink
let 's drink to us
we finally made it did n't we
you bet we did
it 's up to you now
i want our life to be full of excitement king
we 'll never let up will we
never a dull moment
we 'll get on a merry go round and never get off
promise you 'll never let me get off
it 's the only way to live is n't it
no time to think
we do n't want to stop to think do we
just want to keep going
whatever you say darling
i heard about your stunt
that 's swell king
just think of itthe groom lands on the lawn with a plane
it 's a perfect beginning for the life we 're going to lead
it sets just the right tempo
come on king
you 're lagging
where 's the bus to new york
left twenty minutes ago
why that 's ridiculous
i was on that busi told them to wait
sorry miss. it 's gone
ellie 's face clouds
the crowds surge about her
she looks around thoughtfully
suddenly her eyes open in surprise at something she sees and the view then moves over to peter who sits on his suitcase looking toward ellie
eight o'clock tonight
eight o'clock
why that 's twelve hours
sorry miss.
why you ca n't put me out in the middle of the
serves you right
oughta be careful who you take up with on the road
you ca n't go plyin your trade in my camp
but ca n't you wait until morning
ai n't gon na wait a minute
can i use your telephone
i want to talk to new york
you ai n't gon na stick me for no phone calls
you can go down to the sheriff 's office
you made no mistake sitting next to me
just between us the kinda muggs you meet on a hop like this ai n't nothing to write home to the wife about
you got ta be awful careful who you hit up with is what i always say and you ca n't be too particular neither
once when i was comin through north carolina i got to gabbin with a good lookin mama
one of those young ones you know and plenty classy too
kinda struck my fancy
you know how it is
well sir you could'a knocked me over with a mack truck
i was just warming up when she 's yanked offa the bus
who do you think she was
huh
might as well give up
the girl bandit
the one the papers been writin about
yessir you coulda knocked me over with a mack truck
what 's the matter sister
you ai n't sayin much
seems to me you 're doing excellently without any assistance
that 's pretty good
well shut my big nasty mouth
but i do n't go in for that kinda stuffmuch
i like to pick my fillies
take you for instance
you 're my type
no kiddin sister
i could go for you in a big way
fun on the side shapeley they call me and the accent is on the fun believe you me
believe you me you bore me to distraction
hey what 's this
wearing papa 's things
now that 's cute
that 's what i call real lovey dovey
yessir
if you do n't get out of here i 'll slap that fresh mouth of yours
sorryi did n't mean to
get out
okay
i was just trying to make conversation
do you mind taking those things off the walls of jericho
it 's tough enough as it is
oh excuse me
oh by the waywhat 's your name
what 's that
i 've been thinking about you
yes
you 've had a pretty tough break at that
twice a missus and still unkissed
the old man 's screwy
what 's at
i said the old man 's screwy
yeah
the dame 's too smart for him
how 'd you like to be married to a wild cat like that
what 's up
bridge washed outaround dawson
any of your passengers want a place to sleepthere 's an auto camp up yonder a piece
yeah
where
up yonder
see the lights
yeah
that 's it
dyke 's auto camp
thanks
mr. gordon
huh
did you know he reversed the charges on that call
what
say listen you
when you get back to new york take my advice and stay f a r away from this officeunless you do n't care what happens to that funny map of yours
here 's another wire from peter warne
throw it in the basket
what 's it say
have i got a story
it 's getting hotter and hotter
hope you 're the same
collect
yes
do n't accept any more
say listen you would n't know a story if it reached up and kicked you in the pants
yeah
sure sure i got your copy
why did n't you tell me you were going to write it in greek
i 'd start a new department
that was free verse you gashouse palooka
free verse huh
what the dickens was free about it
it cost this paper a gob of dough
well i 'm here to tell you it 's not gon na cost us any more
that 's okay by me
'cause as far as i 'm concerned i 'm through with newspapers
see
i 'm through with stupidity
i 'll never write another newspaper story for you or anybody else if i have to starve
yeah
what about my novel
when i get through with that
when you get through with that i 'll have a beard down to my ankles
get out of here
wait a minute gordoni
get out
i met her on a bus coming from miami
been with her every minute
i 'm in love with her joe
well i 'll be
listen palyou've got to get this money for me
now
minutes count
she 's waiting for me in an auto camp outside of philadelphia
i 've got to get right back
you see she does n't know i 'm gone
a guy ca n't propose to a girl without a cent in the world can he
thanks pal
you saved my life
okay pete
bye agnes
you 're beautiful
all women are beautiful
gordon is immediately electrified into action
oh boy
what a yarn
what a yarn
get me hank on the phone
got ta hold up the morning edition
hello joe
sorry
just a little gag of mine
thought i 'd have some fun with you
yeah
sure
had me going for a while
would n't have made a bad story would it
great
but that 's the way things go
you think you got a swell yarnthen something comes alongmesses up the finishand there you are
yeah where am i
when you sober upcome in and see me
thanks joe
all i 'm asking is enough gas to get me to new york
the bag 's worth twenty five dollars
yeah but i got a bag
my wife gave me one for christmas
listen mani'll tell you what i 'll do
when i come back in the morning i 'll buy it back from you and give you ten dollars profit
what do you say
ai n't got a hat
what
i ai n't got a hat
well you got one now
come on fill er up
funny couple ai n't they
yeah
if you ask me i do n't believe they 're married
they 're married all right
i just seen the license
they made me get 'em a rope and a blanket on a night like this
yeah
what do you reckon that 's for
blamed if i know
i just brung 'em a trumpet
a trumpet
yeah
you know one of those toy things
they sent me to the store to get it
but what in the world do they want a trumpet for
i dunno
you send telegrams here
i 'm just fine thanks and how are you
to joe gordon care of new york mail new york
am i laughing
the biggest scoop of the year just dropped in my lap
i know where ellen andrews is no do you really
go on
go on send the telegram
how would you like to have the story you big tub ofof
mush
mush
tub of mush
well try and get it
what i said about never writing another line for you still goes
are you burning
peter warne
well that will be 2.60
send it collect
collect
collect
there you gotrustin people again
how many times did i tell you
he looked like an upright young feller to me ma
yeah
they 're all upright till they walk out on you
said he was gon na stay a week
mebbe
worst comes to the worst we got his car for security
i do n't trust him
thenyou'll have to git
yeah you 'll have to git
not a minute
better start gettin into your clothes
yeah
zeke
git
yes ma
well you 're two up on me now
hey you
huh
there 's a seat over there for you
what 's the idea
i 'd like to sit with myuhwifeif you do n't mind
wife
yeah
come oncome on
oh excuse me
i was just tryin'you knowto make things pleasant
what 's up
looks like we 're going to be stuck for a long time
say buddy
travelin like this you kinda lose track of what 's goin' on in the world
thanks
if you wanna get anywhere nowadays you got ta keep in touch with all the news is what i always say
that 's right
take that story there for instance
be kinda sweet if we could collect that ten thousand smackers
yeahwouldn't it
it 's a lotta dough
if i was to run across that dame you know what i 'd do
what
i 'd go fifty fifty with you
why
cause i 'm a guy that do n't believe in hoggin it see
a bird that figures that way winds up behind the eight ball,[10 is what i always say
what 's on your mind
five g'sor i crab the works
you 're a pretty shrewd baby
we better get away from this gang
talk this thing over privately
lucky thing my running into you
just the man i need
you 're not making any mistake believe you me
i can use a smart guy like you
say listen when you 're talkin to old man shapeley you 're talking to
do you pack a gat?[11 a close view of the two shows the smile dying on shapeley 's face
he looks up quickly
huh
a gat
a gat
got any fireworks on you
whyno
that 's all right
i got a couple of machine guns in my suitcase
i 'll let you have one of them
yeahthe big boy"the boss of the outfit
you 're not kidnapping her are you
what else stupid
you do n't think we 're after that penny ante reward do you
ten thousand bucks
chicken feed
we 're holding her for a million smackers
say look
i did n't know it was anything like this seeand
what 's the matter with you
gettin yellow
but i 'm a married man
i got a couple of kids
i ca n't get mixed up with
sh sh sh
soft pedal you mug!before i what 're you trying to do
tell the whole world about it
now listen you 're in this thingand you 're staying in
get me
you know too much
i wo n't say anything
honest i wo n't
yeah
how do i know
i got ta good mind to plug you
i should n't take any chances on you
you can trust me mister
i 'll keep my mouth shut
boss oswald impersonators
sounds like james bond now
al you ca n't tell a mink from a coonskin unless you see the fur up close
goddamn sam
if we do n't start reading between the lines here
y'all got ta start thinking on a different level like the cia does
we 're through the looking glass
here white is black and black is white
if this is oswald it must be our third oswald
the interesting thing is the extent to which the warren commission went to make him a communist
they got almost 150 pages and 130 exhibits of the report on this mexico trip and the picture does n't even match
i 'm beginning to think the point of the mexican episode was to lay the blame at castro 's door
if oswald or someone purporting to be oswald had gotten into cuba come back then killed the president the american public once again would 've screamed for a cuban invasion
susie watch the language would you please
my instinct is that ferrie is going to keep on deteriorating and we 'll end up getting more out of him when he finally cracks
if we call him now he might freeze up and we could lose the best shot we 've ever had
i do n't care if he was doing it with giraffes in the zoo numa it 's none of our business
let 's keep this side of it quiet shall we
when you 're in a war boss you use every weapon you got
not one word
that 's an order
the u.s. attorney in washington declines to serve our subpoena on allen dulles charles cabell cia director richard helms or any fbi agent we named
well what do you expect from a pig but a grunt
without them it 's going to be near impossible chief to prove shaw 's connection to the cia
we got the same problem with the governors
all of them
reagan in california wo n't give us brading ohio refuses orville townsend texas on arcacha and nebraska on sandra moffet
william walter the night clerk on duty here in the fbi office gave me a copy of this
it went all over the country
nothing was done and the motorcade went ahead on schedule and this was n't even mentioned in the warren report
read it al
threat to assassinate president kennedy in dallas texas november 22 23
information received by the bureau has determined that a militant revolutionary group may attempt to assassinate president kennedy on his proposed trip to dallas texas etc etc
gentlemen i will not hear this
i value bill as much as anyone here
we all need to make room for someone else 's ideas lou especially me
maybe oswald is what everyone says he is and i 'm just plain dumb wrong
i 've seen him copying files leaving here late at night
why you keep dancing on my head for my man
we been thicker'n molasses pie since law school
because you keep conning me dean
i read your testimony to the warren commission and
there you go
grain of salt
two sides to every coin
you tell them the day after the assassination you were called on the phone by this clay bertrand and asked to fly to dallas and be lee oswald 's layer
right
now that 's pretty important dean
you also told the fbi when you met him he was six foot two
then you tell the commission he was five foot eight
how the hell did the man shrink like that dean
they put the heat on my man just like you 're doing
i gave'em anything that popped into my cabeza
truth is i never met the dude
recall any names
mario jose they wear names like you and i wear clothes
today the name is candy tomorrow it 's butsie
i wish i could help you jim
did you speak to oswald in dallas
hell no
i told this bertrand cat right off this is n't my scene man
i deal with muni court i 'm a hack in nigger town that kid needs a hot dog
then how the hell did you get in the warren commission dean
except through the phone records in the dallas jail
there were no phone records
of course there were n't
'cause they disappeared
and yet the commission found you dean
i do n't know how they got to me
maybe cause i repped him here
the feebees run background checks
on my mama 's breasts man that 's all i got
there was n't no conspiracy jim
if there were why the hell did n't bobby kennedy prosecute it as attorney general he was his brother for chrissake
how the fuck three people could keep a secret like that i do n't know
it was oswald
he was a nut job
faggot y'know hated this country
all this blubbering over that sonofabitch
they 're grieving like they knew the man
it makes me want to puke
god 's sake chief
the president was shot
a bullshit president
i do n't see any weeping for all the thousands of cubans that bastard condemned to death and torture at the bay of pigs
where are all the tears for the russians and hungarians and chinese living like slaves in prison camps run by kennedy 's communist buddies all these damned peace treaties
i 'm telling ya jack that 's what happens when you let the niggers vote
they get together with the jews and the catholics and elect an irish bleeding heart
chief maybe you had a little too much to drink
bullshit
bartender another round
here 's to the new frontier
camelot in smithereens
i 'll drink to that
well the kid musta gone nuts right
i said oswald must 've flipped
just did this crazy thing before anyone could stop him right
i think i 'll cut out here chief
i got ta get home
get home my ass
we 're going to the office have another drink
i want some company tonight
who 'd ever thought that goofy oswald kid would pull off a stunt like an assassination
just goes to show you can never know about some people
am i right jack
well bless my soul
your eyes are as red as two cherries jack
do n't tell me we have another bleeding heart here
hell all these years i thought you were on my side
chief sometimes i do n't know whether you 're kidding or not
i could n't be more serious jack
those big red eyes have me wondering about your loyalty
who the hell opened my files
you 've been looking through my private files have n't you you weasel
you may not like this chief but you 're beginning to act paranoid
i mean you really are
you found out about dave ferrie going to texas today and you went through all my files to see what was going on
you 're a goddamn spy
goddammit chief why would i ever need to look in your files
i saw enough here this summer to write a book
i always lock my files
and you were the only one here today
what do you mean you son of a bitch
you know what i mean
i saw a lot of strange things going on in this office this summer
and a lotta strange people
maybe there 's more to this susie
the cia 's keeping something from our enemies
yes but we 're talking about a dead warehouse employee of no political significance
three years later and he 's still classified
they gave us his grammar school records a study of his pubic hairs
put it in context bill of what we know about oswald
lonely kid no father unstable childhood high school dropout wants to grow up and be a spy joins the marines at 17
he learns russian he acts overtly marxist with two other marines but he 's stationed at a top secret base in japan where u2 spy flights over russia originate
he 's discharged from the marines supposedly because his mother 's sick
he stays home 3 days then with a 1500 ticket from a 203 bank account he goes to moscow
i do n't know if it 's coincidence but oswald had a top security clearance and knew about the u2 program from his days at atsugi air base in japan
six months after he arrives in russia francis gary powers u2 spy flight goes down in russia
that plane was untouchable
powers hinted that oswald could 've given the russians enough data to hit it
as a direct result the peace summit between khrushchev and eisenhower failed
i ca n't help thinking of that book seven days in may maybe someone in our military did n't want the peace conference to happen maybe oswald was part of that
it gets weirder
susie you 're an assistant d.a. remember
stick to what you can prove in court
you want facts bill
okay
from 1945 to 59 only two u.s. soldiers defect to russia
from 59 to 60 seven defect six return one of them another marine a month before oswald
all of them young men made to seem poor disenchanted
who
grab your socks and pull
clay bertrand is clay shaw
no
shaw
director of the trade mart
this is incredible
who do you think fed him that information
garrison 's going down
we 're talking your career here bill your life
you 're a young guy
we know you 're working that castro thing
no i 'm not
yes you are
look we know oswald did n't pull that trigger
castro did
but if that comes out there 's gon na be a war boy millions of people are gon na die
that 's a hell of a lot more important than jim garrison
goddammit look at me when i talk to you
you 're too goddamn self- opinionated now shut up
if you got a brain in that thick skull of yours listen to me
listen real hard
correct me if i 'm wrong
i thought we were on the same side
what the hell business is it of theirs to say that
pretty fast was n't it
the way they let him go
what do you think lou
i 'm just an investigator bill
i leave the theories to you lawyers
you numa
it 's addressed to no one and no signature
to leave this life is for me a sweet prospect
i find nothing in it that is desirable and on the other hand everything that is loathsome
pretty flowery for dave ferrie
the fact is he 's gone chief and so 's our case
not unless we go for shaw now
with whose testimony
willie o'keefe
a male prostitute
jack martini
a drunk
vernon bundy
a dope fiend
shaw 's got respect the newspaper editors the american bar association they 're not
yeah
they were seen together in clinton in early september
the civil rights movement was running a voter registration drive
... rumor is shaw a local boy was working on some arms deal to discredit the civil rights movement
no one really knows what they were doing there but everyone sure saw 'em
they stood out like cottonballs
i got whites and blacks saw 'em but last time i checked there was nothing illegal with registering to vote
we still got the negro junkie vernon bundy saw 'em talkin at the seawall near lake pontchartrain
but it 's tough boss no one wants to talk about shaw
he 's
you know you keep saying that
keep saying what
you 're not digging
clay bertrand
sure i know him
he comes around the quarter
who is he joe
i 've been to every bar no one wants to talk
i told your uncle i never met a lawman who was n't a punk
you too bill even if you 're family
he 's a big shot businessman
i seen him on the tv news a lot with all the other big shots
a fag you know
goes by another name down here
what 's the other name
shaw
clay shaw
clay bertrand is clay shaw
the guy who used to run the international trade mart
yeah what 's the big mystery
everybody down here knows the guy
so why does he call himself bertrand
who gives a shit what he calls himself
clay bertrand willie
yeah
clay
i met him sometime in june of 62 at the masquerade bar
dave ferrie took me there for the express reason to meet him
fuck yes
hell i 'm already in jail
i got no reason to lie to you
i ai n't no nigger
go on willie
... well the party got crazier and crazier one of those y'know beatnik type things
hold your horses
what kinda source
the anonymous kind chief
morning boys
ready for a walking tour
at 7:30 sunday morning
it 's not exactly fresh blood we 're sniffing here boss
old stains bill but just as telling
what the hell 's a communist like lee oswald doing working out of banister 's
y'ever heard of a double agent bill
i 'm beginning to doubt oswald was ever a communist
after the arrest 544 camp street never appeared on the pamphlets again
now here 's another one for you what would you say if i told you lee oswald had been trained in the russian language when he was a marine
lord wake me please
i must be dreaming
no you 're awake bill and i 'm dead serious
and we 're going to start by tracking down your anonymous source from three years ago
how did you find out dave ferrie drove to texas that day
well it 's a terrific yard chief but the man 's an obvious alcoholic with a reputation lower than crocodile piss
does that bother you bill
i always wondered in court why it is because a woman is a prostitute she has to have bad eyesight
he 'll never sign a statement boss let alone get on a witness stand
when something 's rotten in the land bill it generally is n't just one fish we 'll get corroboration
find this clay bertrand
if i were a betting man i 'd give you 10 to 1 it 's an alias
start checking around the quarter
and the six of us with almost no budget and in secret are going to solve the case that the warren commission with dozens of support staff and millions of dollars could n't solve
we ca n't keep up with the crimes in the parish as it is chief
the murder of a president bill is a crime in orleans parish too
i did n't pick you because of your legal skill you know
gee thanks boss
i 'm lost boss
what are we saying here
we 're saying that when oswald went to russia he was not a real defector that he was an intelligence agent on some kind of mission for our government and he remained one till the day he died that 's what we 're saying
and therefore because oswald pulled the trigger the intelligence community murdered their own commander in chief
that 's what you 're saying
i 'll go you one better
maybe oswald did n't even pull the trigger bill
the nitrate test indicates he did n't even fire a rifle on november 22nd
and on top of that they did n't even bother to check if the rifle had been fired that day
he had his palm print on the weapon
it went to the goddamn fbi and they did n't find a goddamn thing
it comes back a week later and one guy in the dallas police department suddenly finds a palm print which for all i know he could 've taken off oswald at the morgue
there 's no chain of evidence bill
and what about the tow guns actually seen in the depository
one an enfield photographed by a newsman and the other a mauser described by deputy weitzman
maybe just maybe lee oswald was exactly what he said he was bill a patsy
take it at face value
lou susie i 'm going with my gut here
he 's got an alias of hidell to buy the rifle o.h. lee to rent the room right
what 's in a name right
in intelligence they 're assumed to be fake
a name is sort of like a postbox number a code several different people can use the same name right
then why ca n't somebody be using oswald 's name
but why
to frame him obviously
you got to get in your minds how the hell spooks think bill
they 're not ordinary crooks
that 's fine numa but what about all the people who are n't writing letters
they 're sitting home reading all these lies
i just heard nbc crew 's in town to do a white paper not on the kennedy killing but on us
one of their top guys harry stoner is talking to everybody he can find about you boss
oh jesus stoner
why does n't he call me
those bastards
that 's proof enough right there of what we 're up against
the whole goddamn federal government bill
well they offered you the carrot and you turned it down
you know what 's coming next do n't you boss
found another note same thing no name no signature
when you receive this i will be quite dead so no answer will be possible
i offered you love
all i got in return in the end was a kick in the teeth
jesus they must 've been hard pressed to come up with that one
all right all right
break it up
where you going boss
i do n't know bill i just do n't know
i do n't buy it chief why would the fbi cover it up
you 're talking the whole fbi here
a telex that disappears from every single fbi office in the country
there 's a word orders
shaw 's our toehold bill
i do n't know exactly what he is where he fits and i do n't care
i do know he 's lying through his teeth and i 'm not gon na let go of him
so for those reasons you 're going to trial against clay shaw chief
well you 're gon na lose
we should be investigating all our mafia leads here in new orleans carlos marcello santos trafficante i can buy that a hell of a lot easier than the government
ruby 's all mob knows oswald sets him up
hoffa trafficante marcello they hire some guns and they do kennedy and maybe the government does n't want to open up a whole can o'worms there because it used the mob to get to castro
y'know castro being assassinated sounds pretty wild to john q. citizen
so they close the book on j.f.k. it makes sense to me
i do n't doubt their involvement bill but at a low level
could the mob change the parade route bill or eliminate the protection for the president
could the mob send oswald to russia and get him back
could the mob get the fbi the cia and the dallas police to make a mess of the investigation
could the mob appoint the warren commission to cover it up
could the mob wreck the autopsy
could the mob influence the national media to go to sleep
and since when has the mob used anything but
38 's for hits up close
the mob would n't have the guts or the power for something of this magnitude
assassins need payrolls orders times schedules
this was a military style ambush from start to finish
a coup d'etat with lyndon johnson waiting in the wings
oh now you 're saying lyndon johnson was involved
the president of the united states
i know this bill lyndon johnson got 1 billion for his texas friends brown and root to dredge cam ranh bay for the military in vietnam
that 's just for openers
boss are you calling the president a murderer
if i 'm so far from the truth why is the fbi bugging our offices
why are our witnesses being bought off and murdered
why are federal agencies blocking our extraditions and subpoenas when we were never blocked before
maybe 'cause there 's some rogue element in the government
with a full blown conspiracy to cover it up
y'ever read your shakespeare bill
yeah
julius caesar brutus and cassius they too are honorable men
who killed caesar
twenty twenty five senators
all it takes is one judas bill a few people on the inside pentagon cia
this is louisiana chief
how the hell do you know who your daddy is
'cause your momma told you so
you 're way out there taking a crap in the wind boss and i for one ai n't going along on this one
jim sighs saddened
bill was one of his best men
mr. goldberg you claim you met david ferrie and clay shaw while on a vacation here from your accounting business in new york you had drinks and under the influence discussed killing kennedy is that not so
i did
why
well i wanted to make sure she 's the same girl i sent
i see
and why are you experiencing this paranoia
well you see i 've been subject to hypnosis and psychological warfare ever since 1948 when i was in korea
... oswald
no i did not
... ever called dean andrews
no i did not
... and have you ever met david ferrie
no i would not even know what he looked like except for the pictures i 've been shown
... did you ever use the alias clay bertrand
no i did not
thank you
mr. shaw
you know damn well who it is
dave
yeah you got it
since you 're the only straight shooter in that fuckin office i 'd like an answer from you
did you plant it
dave do you think we 're out of our minds
the whole building 's been a zoo since that broke
we ca n't get a thing done
reporters crawling everywhere
you think we want that
somebody planted that fucking story
and somebody tipped off the press i 'm one of garrison 's fucking suspects
i ca n't go home
i 'm out on the street
the maggots are everywhere
do you know what you 've done to me
it 's all over the national news now
you know what you 've done to me
calm down dave what
i 'm a dead man
from here on believe me i 'm a dead man
what are you talking about dave
you were n't mentioned in the story
do n't jump to conclusions
you think your investigation 's been all that secret
you know when you talk to people they talk to other people
what did they
you still questioning any cubans
dave you know that 's where this road leads
it leads farther than that
dave just calm down
meet me in the lobby of the fontainbleau in 20 minutes
i 'll have a suite reserved for you under an assumed name
the fontainbleau
20 minutes
yeah
come on dave come on our side
i guarantee you the boss'll protect you
dave
... give me protection
yeah
he 'd kill for you dave
he likes you
your mind
i got no place to sleep
i 'll meet you in 20 minutes
i 'm caught in the middle
they 're after me
it 's almost over
listen dave why do n't we order some room service have a bite relax
i 'll stay as long as you want
i do n't know who to trust anymore
yeah sure i could use a pot of hot coffee and a few packs of camels
you got anything new in the investigation
dave i always play square
no bugs
i 'd love you to go on the record but i"m in no hurry
whenever you 're ready
i do n't have much time
they do n't even need bugs anymore
they got these fuckin satellite waves
they put a bug in a friend of mine when he was born right up his nostrils subcutaneous between his eyes
he was one of those products of a crossbreading experiment
a nazi rocket scientist father and a commie spy mother
you 'd never believe half the shit the agency does
i 'm so fuckin tired
have n't slept since that shit article came out
why 'd you guys have to go and get me involved with this
did we involve you dave or did clay shaw
that cocksuckin faggot
he 's got me by the balls
what do you mean
photographs compromising stuff
and he 'll use 'em
the agency plays for keeps
i knew oswald
he was in my civil air patrol unit
i taught him everything
a wanna be y'know nobody really liked him cause he was a snitch
i treated him good
he 'd talk about his kid y'know really wanted her to grow up with a chance but
he got a raw deal
the agency fucked him
just like they 're gon na fuck me
what about the mob dave
how do they figure in this
they 're agency too
do n't you get it
cia and mafia together
trying to whack out the beard
mutual interests
they been doing it for years
there 's more to this than you dream
fbi fucking hates the cia
navy intelligence got something to do with it too
check out alan pope in miami
jack youngblood
bill harvey
colonel roselli
the shooter i hear was a dallas cop the bagman at ruby 's club
i heard he shot his own partner
got that
check out the rich fucks in dallas
h.l. hunt
he 's dirty
that 's all i know
but the agency always runs the show
check out something called mongoose operation mongoose
government pentagon stuff they 're in charge but who the fuck pulls whose chain who the fuck knows fun n games man check out southeast asia that 's the next big number the heroin trail
oh what a deadly web we weave when we practice to deceive
come in dave
have a seat make yourself comfortable
coffee
do you remember me mr. garrison
i met you on carondolet street right after your election
i congratulated you remember
how could i forget
you make quite a first impression
sharon could you please bring us some coffee
i 've heard over the years you 're quite a first rate pilot dave
legend has it you can get in and out of any field no matter how small
i 'm a bit of a pilot myself you know
flew grasshoppers for the field artillery in the war
you mean about the cubans getting trained north of the lake
oh you got that
banister 's pet project
getting paid by the government to work against the government
beautiful
what a mind he had what a guy guy
he had all those files
who was paying you dave
you think i was a getaway pilot for the assassination do n't you
i do n't know
were you
who you scared of dave
everybody
the agency
the mob
the cubans
yeah follow the cubans
check them out
here in dallas miami
check out a guy named eladio del valle
my paymaster when i flew missions into cuba he 's somewhere in miami
you 're on the right track
let me get this straight now
clay shaw is blackmailing you
fuckin a. how do you think the agency gets people to do their bullshit
fuck knows what they got on oswald
was it the same oswald dave that was in dallas or was it an impersonator
same one
i did n't know no impersonator
did you take a good look at the tv when they had oswald
black black just give it to me
shit
i 'm so exhausted
my neck is killing me
i 've got cancer
had it for years
i been working with mice y'know trying to come up with a cure
dave can i just ask you this directly
did you ever work for the cia
you make it sound like some remote fuckin experience in ancient history
man you never leave the agency
once they got you you 're in for life
and shaw
shaw 's an untouchable man highest clearance
shaw oswald the cubans all agency
what about ruby
jack
jack was a pimp
a bagman in dallas for the mob
he used to run guns to castro when he was still on our side
check out jack youngblood
shit we almost had castro
then we tried to whack him
everybody 's flipping sides all the time
it 's fun n games man fun n games
then who killed the president
oh man why do n't you stop
this is too fuckin big for you
who did kennedy
it 's a mystery wrapped in a riddle inside an enigma
even the shooters do n't fuckin know
do n't you get it yet
i ca n't be talking like this
they 're gon na kill me
i 'm gon na die
i do n't know what happened
all i wanted in the world was to be a catholic priest live in a monastery study ancient latin manuscripts pray serve god
but i had this one terrible fatal weakness
they defrocked me
and then i started to lose everything
shit
forgot to glue this fuckin rug today
you know at one time i even had a full head of hair like everyone else
and then i lost that
that fuckin clay shaw
i hate the bastard
all i got left is in his rotten bloody hands
he tipped the newspapers i know it
that 's how the agency works
they use people chew them up spit 'em out
now it 's my turn
dave it 's going to be okay
just talk to us on the record and we 'll protect you
i guarantee it
they 'll get to you too they 'll destroy you
they 're untouchable man
i 'm so fucking exhausted i ca n't see straight
get some rest dave and you 'll feel better in the morning
we 'll talk then
yeah yeah
but leave me alone for awhile
i got to make some calls
colonel finck are you saying someone told you not to dissect the neck
i was told that the family wanted examination of the head
as a pathologist it was your obligation to explore all possible causes of death was it not
i had the cause of death
your honor i would ask you to direct the witness to answer my question
why did colonel finck not dissect the track of the bullet wound in the neck
well i heard dr. humes stating that he said
jesus ed from time immemorial it 's been standard booking procedure to ask an alias
you know that
there 's no constitutional requirement that says a lawyer has to be present for routine questions
i call'em as i see'em jim
i 'm ruling it inadmissible
that 's our case
if that 's your case you did n't have a case
i would n't believe whatever habighorst said anyway
i ca n't believe you 're saying this in the courtroom
well i am saying it
bring in the jury
daddy said it was all right if i was real quiet
sure it is
freckle face if i ever handled a minor felon like that it 'd be all over the papers
i 'd catch hell
and this is the alleged murderer of the president
dad look what i drew
that 's something jasper
what is it
a rhinoceros
can i stay up another hour
daddy
where have you been
hi freckle face
are we going away daddy
well it looks like it jasper
because of kennedy
are the same people gon na kill us daddy
no jasper nobody 's gon na kill us
i 'm scared
there 's nothing wrong with feeling a little scared jasper virginia
telling the truth can be a scary thing
it scared president kennedy but he was a brave man
if you let yourself be too scared then you let the bad guys take over the country do n't you and then everybody gets scared
he asked me why i thought i was in danger and i said
well if they can kill the president they can certainly get me
that does n't make sense mrs. hill
we have the man that killed the president
no you do n't
he kept trying to get me to change my story about the shots
he was getting hot under the collar and telling the woman not to write when he wanted
look do you want the truth or just what you want me to say
i want the truth
the truth is that i heard between four and six shots
i 'm not going to lie for you
... you heard echoes
no
i had guns all my life
i used to go turtle shooting
i realize you 're under a great deal of stress
it 's clouded your judgement
so off the record he starts talking about my family and even mentioned my marriage was in trouble like i did n't know it or something
he got angrier and angrier and then
look we can put you in a mental institution
we can make you look crazier'n marguerite oswald and everybody knows how crazy she is
i knew something was crooked as a dog 's hind leg 'cause no one who is just taking a deposition gets that involved and angry
sure enough when i finally read my testimony as published by the warren commission it was a fabrication from start to finish
these new people never identified themselves
they musta been watching the whole thing 'cause they knew everything mary and me had been doing that day
i guess i was n't too hard to find wearing that red raincoat
how many shots you say you heard
four to six
that 's impossible
you heard echoes
echoes
we have three bullets and three shots which came from the book depository and that 's all we 're willing to say
... which is strange 'cause this is less than 20 minutes after the assassination
no i saw a guy shooting from over there
he was behind that fence
what are you going to do about it
we have that taken care of
you only heard three shots and you are not to talk to anyone about this
no one you hear
i was scared
it was all kinda queer but it sure felt like two and two was coming up three
and then they took mary 's five snapshots from me sent them to washington and when they returned them weeks later two of them had the backgrounds mutilated
the only one we saved was in mary 's camera
i did n't want to go to washington when the warren commission subpoenaed me
so the lawyer come down here and interviewed me at parkland hospital
do n't get sidetracked
how does he get back to the states
that 's the point
does he have any problems
none
the state department issues him a new passport in 48 hours and loans him the money to travel
he 's never investigated or charged by the navy for revealing classified information or as far as we know debriefed by the cia
this is a man whose secrets cause us to change our radar patterns in the pacific
he should 've been prosecuted as a traitor
the fbi finally gets around to talking to him in dallas and runs a file on him as a miscreant communist type
but who meets him when he gets off the boat in new york in june 62
spas t. raikin a leading member of an anti communist group
and marina
does she have a problem getting out
none either
it 's bizarre
it 's next to impossible to get russian sweethearts out
nor does lee have any problem getting a new passport when he wants to go to cuba and russia in 63
a man who has defected once already
it 's crazy
dammit it does n't add up
ordinary people get blacklisted for leftist affiliations
the state department did everything short of dispatching a destroyer to minks to insure oswald 's return
only intelligence people can come and go like that
the next thing we know he 's living in dallas ft
worth in october 62 working 6 months at jaggars chiles- stovall a photographic firm that contracts to make maps for the u.s. army
he starts work only days before the government reveals russian missiles in cuba and the crisis explodes
oswald may have had access to missile site footage obtained by the u2 planes and works alongside a young man who 'd been in the army security agency
sort of like benedict arnold coming back to george washington 's cabinet
equally incongruous is oswald becoming chummy with the white russian community of dallas all rabid anti- communists
the oswalds are introduced by george de mohrenschildt to janet and bill williams
it 's through janet williams in october 63 that lee gets the warehouse job right smack on elm street at the book depository which is owned by another oilman with ties to defense and military intelligence
presumably so he can now exercise his intellect stacking school texts at 1.25 an hour
all i can find out about the williams is their tax returns are classified and that bill williams a descendant of the cabots of massachusetts has links through his family and united fruit to the cia and does classified work for bell helicopter which requires a security clearance so what is oswald a defector doing visiting his wife in his house
williams has a relationship at bell with general walter dornberger another one of the nazis we brought in after the war for our missile program
he used slave labor to build the v-2 rockets for hitler before bell needed him
i wonder about the williams
just where did the first description of oswald come from at 12:44
no one knows
they claimed it was brennan 's but his description came after 1 p.m. who called
somehow the fbi 's been tapping the williams and picks up a call between bell helicopter and janet 's phone an unidentified voice saying we both know who 's responsible
who called
why 's the bureau been tapping them
... now it gets positively spooky
in january 1961 in new orleans at the bolton ford dealership when the oswald we know is in russia there is a man using the name oswald to buy trucks for the friends of democratic cuba
the salesman never saw him again but guess who 's on the articles of incorporation of the friends of democratic cuba
guy banister
banister has someone using the name oswald to buy the trucks
hoover at the fbi writes a memo dated june 1960 that there could be someone using oswald 's passport and identity
goddamn
they put oswald together from day one
like some dummy corporation in the bahamas you just move him around a board
sent him to russia in and out no passport problems
you got the word microdots in his notebook you got the minox camera and the electronic devices they find in his possessions the sealed diz201 personnel file
for all we know there could be a dozen oswalds in different cities countries all of them leaving a trail of incriminating evidence that could easily be traced to a scapegoat after the assassination
does the real oswald know he 's been put together
who knows
it does n't matter does it
he 's a low level spy he does n't know who he really works for
i do n't believe it
bugging the district attorney 's office of new orleans
it 's outrageous
i think clinton is a breakthrough
shaw denies he knows ferrie or oswald
is that right
it proves he 's a liar
keep on it bill
this is interesting are you ready for this
oswald went to see the fbi two weeks before the assassination
it seems special agent hosty made three routine visits to his house supposedly to keep an eye on marina oswald
i 'm not sure i understand
well
in an investigation we 're conducting your name has come up a number of times
i would n't imagine where
we recently talked to a number of men who claim to know you
are you acquainted with a david logan
no
never heard of him
a perry russo
no
a willie o'keefe
no i do n't believe i know anyone by that name
mr. o'keefe told us he met you at the masquerade bar down in the quarter and several evenings later you had him over for dinner at your apartment on dauphine street
do you recall that
perhaps a few more details about the evening will refresh your memory
mr. o'keefe told us dinner was served by a uniformed waiter a colored man
he particularly remembers that you sat at one end and he at the other which he found rather unusual because the table was so long
does that bring back memories of willie o'keefe
not at all
but on the other hand i do have a lovely chippendale dining table and i often have a friend over sitting at one end while i sit at the other
that is precisely the point of a long dining table
the splendor of the meal adds to the enjoyment of it
i would imagine a uniformed waiter helps
it adds a taste of elegance for which i must confess a weakness for now and then
i call him smedley
his real name is frankie jenkins but i could hardly imagine anything more uncouth during dinner than my turning toward the kitchen and hollering frankie
where is this leading to mr. garrison
after dinner you paid him to have sex with you
pffft
absolute nonsense
the quarter is filled with vivid imaginations my dear mr. garrison grimy young hoodlums who 'll say and do anything
as you well know
... in the course of that night mr. o'keefe said a man named david ferrie stopped by the house
along with another young man
who
david ferrie
no
i have never known anyone by that name
of course never having met mr. o'keefe i could hardly have met mr. ferrie
... and that the four of you partied early into the morning hours
let me show you his picture
no
i 'm sure i 've never met anyone of such a bizarre appearance
does the name clay bertrand mean anything to you
clay bertrand
clay bertrand
i believe there was a man with a name similar to that who worked at the chamber of commerce
is that the man you had in mind
no it was not
do you know an attorney by the name of dean andrews
one meets so many attorneys in my business
no i do n't believe i know dean andrews
mr. shaw can you identify this man
naturally
are you claiming mr. garrison that mr. oswald also had dinner with me
mr. shaw did you ever meet lee harvey oswald
you really have me consorting with a cast of sordid characters do n't you mr. garrison
please answer the question
of course not
such a pity that assassination
in fact i admired president kennedy
a man with true panache and a wife with impeccable taste
mr. shaw this is an italian newspaper article saying you were a member of the board of centro mondo commerciale in italy that this company was a creature of the cia for the transfer of funds in italy for illegal political espionage activities
it says that this company was expelled from italy for those activities
i 'm well aware of this asinine article
and i am thinking very seriously of suing this rag of a newspaper
it says that this company has heavily fascist ties to the french secret army organization that tried to assassinate de gaulle in 1960
nonsense
what next
... and that this company is linked to the schlumber tool company here in houma louisiana which is where their arms may have come from to david ferrie and his cubans
mr. garrison you 're reaching
i am an international businessman
the trade mart which i founded is america 's commercial pipeline to latin america
i trade everywhere
i am accused as are all businessmen of all things
i somehow go about my business make money help society the best i can and try to promote free trade in this world
mr. shaw have you ever been a contract agent with the central intelligence agency
and if i was mr. garrison
do you think i would be here today
talking to somebody like you
no people like you do n't have to i guess people like you walk between the raindrops
may i go
regardless of what you may think of me mr. garrison i am a patriot first and foremost
i 've spent half my life in the united states military serving and defending this great country mr. shaw and you 're the first person i ever met who considered it an act of patriotism to kill his own president
now just a minute sir
you 're way out of line
this says mercer could not identify any of the photographs as being identical with the person she had observed slouched over the wheel of a green ford pickup truck
that 's not true
i recognized him and i told them so
they also said it was a dark green air conditioning truck which it was not
and here
on the dallas sheriff 's report
this is really strange
see that notarized signature on the bottom of each page
that 's not my signature
and there never was any notary present during any of my questioning
i guess that 's all
mrs. mercer as a former fbi man it 's difficult to accept this
i know but mr. garrison the fbi is just not doing their job
jim dinner 's just about ready
i 've got a surprise for you
tried something new
jim
jim dinner
mmmmm
sure smells good
but egghead do you realize oswald was interrogated for twelve hours after the assassination with no lawyer present and nobody recorded a word of it
i ca n't believe it
a police captain with 30 years experience and a crowd of federal agents just had to know that with no record anything that oswald said would be inadmissible in court
come on now we 'll talk about it at the table dinner 's getting cold
what are you doing in here
i ca n't believe a man as intelligent as earl warren ever read what 's in those volumes
well maybe you 're right jim
i 'll give you one hour to solve the case
until the kids are in bed
then you 're mine and mr. kennedy can wait til morning
come on everybody say goodnight to daddy
one hour y'hear
some saturday night date you are
mama warned me this would happen if i married such a serious man
oh she did huh
when i come up i 'll show you how saturday night got invented
honey you all right
it 's incredible honey the whole thing
a lieutenant colonel testifies that lee oswald was given a russian language exam as part of his marine training only a few months before he defects to the soviet union
a russian exam
i can not believe this
it 's four- thirty jim garrison
i have five children are gon na be awake in another hour and
honey in all my years in the service i never knew a single man who was given a russian test
oswald was a radar operator
he 'd have about as much use for russian as a cat has for pajamas
these books are getting to your mind mr. garrison
i wish you 'd stop readin them
and then this colonel tries to make it sound like nothing
oswald did badly on the test he says
he only had two more russian words right than wrong
ha
that 's like me saying touchdown here
is not very intelligent because i beat him three games out of five the last time we played chess
jim what is going on for heaven 's sake
you going to stay up all night every night
for what
so you 'll be the only man in america who read the entire 26 volumes of the warren report
liz do i have to spell it out for you
lee oswald was no ordinary soldier
that was no accident he was in russia
he was probably in military intelligence
that 's why he was trained in russian
honey go back to sleep please
goddammit
i been sleeping for three years
do you have any evidence against him jim
clay shaw 's done so much for the city with all that restoration in the quarter
he 's well connected all his friends the money people be careful jim
it 'll be off the record honey
i 'll bring him in on a sunday
a quiet little chat between gentlemen
jim come on honey get down on your hands and knees and hunt for jasper 's easter egg
you know i do n't like these tribal rituals freckle face
i 'm interviewing clay shaw this morning
no
i told you i was going to talk to shaw
but why in the lord 's name would you do it in the middle of easter sunday when you knew we were
because when i scheduled it i did n't realize it was a holiday
you were there why did n't you say something
look at the calendar for christ 's sake
you said a sunday not easter sunday
i 'm sorry but it 's important
clay shaw is important
i 'm sorry
you 're missing most of your life jim and you do n't even know it
the kids are missing out too
it 's not just you making the sacrifice here honey
look i 'll rush and be there by two i promise
go ahead without me
nothing is going to happen to you
i wo n't let it
leave us alone for god 's sake
oh it 's lou
did you enter virginia into a beauty contest
what
a man just called
he asked her everything
honey some crackpot
martin luther king was killed in memphis today
your daughter 's life was just threatened
just a crank making phone calls
happens a dozen times a day at the office
our home jim
a kidnapper a murderer who knows
only cowards make crank calls sweetheart nothing is going to happen
how do you know
how do you even know what goes on in this house anymore
you 're too busy making speeches stirring up every crazed klansman in louisiana after us
get a hold of yourself
i 'm leaving
i 'm taking the kids and i 'm leaving
i wo n't stand it anymore
honey come on
the government wants you to be scared
they want everybody to be scared to speak out
they count on it
but there 's nothing to be scared of
you and your government
what 's the matter with you
do n't you have any feelings
your daughter
what kind of man are you
i 'll take them up to my mother 's if it 'll make you feel better
spend a week
i 'll change the locks the phone lines i 'll even get a bodyguard all right
elizabeth get a hold of yourself
jim before this kennedy thing nothing mattered to you in this life more than your children
the other night jasper tried to show you a drawing
you did n't even notice he was there
he came to me bawling his little eyes out
jim he 's sensitive he needs more from you
i promise i 'll make more time for jasper
is it such a chore
i do n't understand you
damn it if i say i 'll spend more time with him i 'll spend more time with him
i ca n't fight you and the world too liz
i 'm not fighting you jim i 'm just trying to reach you
you 've changed
of course i 've changed
my eyes have opened and once they 're open believe me what used to look normal seems insane
and now king
do n't you think this has something to do with that
ca n't you see
i do n't want to see goddammit
i 'm tired
i 've had enough
they say you do n't have anything anyway
everybody in town 's talking
you 're ruining this man shaw 's life
you 're attacking him because he 's homosexual
going ahead with this stupid trial
did you ever once stop and consider what he 's going through
that 's not why i 'm attacking him
you do n't believe me all this time you never believed me
oh i do n't know anymore
i believe there was a conspiracy but not the government
i just want to raise our children and live a normal life
i want my life back
well so do i goddammit
so do i
i had a life too y'know i had a life too
but you just ca n't bury your head in the sand like some ostrich goddammit elizabeth
it 's not just about you and your well- being and your two cars and your kitchen and your tv and i 'm jes fine honey
while our kids grow up into a shithole of lies
well i 'm not fine about that i 'm angry
my life is fucked liz
and yours is too
and if you do n't want to support me i can understand that but do n't you go start making threats of taking the children away
you never talked to me this way before jim garrison
i 'm not making any threats
i 'm leaving you
i 'm taking the kids to my mother 's
i am i am
and if you 're wrong
i never doubted for a second that i was
will you come to the trial elizabeth
i do n't think so jim
they killed him honey
huh
he won
and they killed robert kennedy
they shot him down
oh no
no
i ca n't believe it
i ca n't believe it
both of them both brothers oh my god
anything else unusual about him you 'd be able to describe in a court of law willie
i remember he had some kinda thing wrong with his left leg
he limped
do n't get me wrong he 's not one of those you know limp wrists
he 's a butch john
you 'd meet him on the street you 'd never snap
you could go fishing with him play poker with him you 'd never snap in a million years
so one night we were over at ferrie 's place
having a party
sometime in the late summer of 63
willie are you willing to repeat your statements under sodium pentothal
under the supervision of a doctor
fuck yeah
i told you so
and you can tell'em all i told you so
you realize the things you 're saying willie are going to be attacked by a lot of different people
bring on all the motherfuckers
bring their college degrees in here
i got nuthin' to hide
they ca n't buy me
you ca n't buy me
i do n't even need the parole
this is about the truth coming out
you 're a goddamn liberal mr. garrison you do n't know shit cause you never been fucked in the ass
fascism is here now facism is
no one 's trying to buy you willie
it 's important to know why you 're telling us this
you wanna know why
'cause that mother fucker kennedy stole that fuckin election that 's why
nixon was gon na be one of the great presidents til kennedy wrecked this fuckin country
got niggers all over the fuckin place asking for their rights where do you think we got all this fuckin crime now 'cause kennedy promised 'em too damned much
revolution comin
fascism 's coming back
i tell ya this the day that communist sumbitch died was a great day for this country
i jes hate to think they 're blaming it on some silly fuckin oswald who did n't know shit anyway
people should know why that sumbitch was killed
'cause he was a communist
put me on the stand go ahead i 'll tell the same goddamn story i 'm proud of it do n't matter fuck all to me things do n't change
what 's wrong lou
boss the president 's been shot
in dallas
five minutes ago
oh no
how bad
no word yet
but they think it 's in the head
one little guy with a cheap rifle look what he can do
let 's get outta here lou
i saw too much stuff like this in the war
i know david a strange character
he 's been in trouble before
used to be a hot shot pilot for eastern airlines but he got canned after an alleged homosexual incident with a 14-year old boy
remember whose office this was back in 63
531 lafayette street
yeah guy banister
ex fbi man
he died couple years ago
i 'd say he was probably getting intelligence training
lou you were in the marines
who would be running that training
the office of naval intelligence
take a look across the street
they took 'em to the sheriff 's office not the police station and they let 'em go
no record of them ever being questioned
i ca n't say that comes as a surprise anymore
a photographer from the dallas times herald got some great shots of them never published
... take a good look chief do any of 'em look like the hoboes you remember
hoboes i knew of old used to sleep in their clothes these two look pretty young
... not a single frayed collar or cuff new haircuts fresh shaves clean hands new shoe leather
look at the ear of the cop
that 's a wire
what 's a cop wearing a headset for
i think they 're actors chief they 're not cops
graveyard dead
august this year
a single car accident on an empty road in midlothian texas
the doctor said he was in some kind of strange shock when he died
we need to find more witnesses lou
there was rose cheramie
a whore
two cubans threw her out of a car on the way to dallas
can we find her
graveyard dead near big sandy texas in 65
two in the morning on some highway
a hit and run
i never could figure out why this guy orders a traceable weapon to that post office box when you can go into any store in texas give a phony name and walk out with a cheap rifle which can never be traced
unless he or someone else wants him to get caught
maybe he never ordered the weapon lou
somebody else did
it was picked up at the post office early morning when oswald 's time sheet shows him clocked in at his job
lou come alive
these things are not adding up
mobbed up all the way
tight with the dallas cops
i 'm digging chief
i just need 10 more men and some more dollars
i know you do lou
i 'm doing three more lectures this month
you 're all doing an incredible job sue al numa
but this is one where if you do n't nail the other guy you 're dead
how did jack ruby dies so quick
of what
cancer right
a history of nazi germany lou
they were studying viral cancers as a weapon in the 30 's
we learned a lot more than you think from the nazis
read this
our biological warfare lab is in fort detrick maryland
close to where the national cancer institute is located
think about it
think the unthinkable question everything
goddamn sam
and it ai n't pretty
the ad has spent more than 8,000 on unexplained travel and investigative expenses since november 1966
you do n't get it guys he ca n't go down any further
we got to protect him full time
i have a plane to catch
going to washington
an interesting lead says he 's closely connected to these events but he wo n't come down here
i know what you 're going through with ferrie lou
we 'll talk tomorrow
i 'm onto ferrie 's cuban paymaster eladio del valle in miami
i got ta get him in boss
i need more men i ca n't even pull the teams to watch ferrie
this is our case
when kennedy gets to the kill zone it 's a turkey shoot
how many men
one shooter
one spotter on a radio
maybe three teams
i 'd say these were professional riflemen chief serious people
hunters
patient
it takes skill to kill with a rifle that 's why there 's been no execution of an executive with one in 200 years
3 2 1
green
or else abort
abort
who do you think changed the parade route
beats me
city officials
secret service
dallas police
they did a dry run with chief curry a few days before
but they did n't bother running through dealey
they stopped right there said something like and afterwards there 's only the freeway and went home
you know who the mayor was
no
earle cabell
and guess who his brother is
who
general charles cabell
deputy director of the cia
fired by kennedy in 61 because of the bay of pigs fiasco he moved back to the pentagon called kennedy a traitor
when he came to new orleans to address the foreign policy association you know who introduced him
our friend clay shaw
the warren commission call him
his boss was the one on the warren commission who handled all the leads to the intelligence community
allen dulles
head of the cia since 53
kennedy fired them both
cabell was his deputy for nine years
talk about the fox investigating the chicken coop
now we 'll have to subpoena them lou
they 're gon na love you chief
maybe we should just call it a day lou
go home
while we 're still a little behind
we got two people killed maybe more we never thought about
you never got anyone killed boss
their actions killed them years before
if we stopped now it 'd be even more wrong
chief i 've had my doubts about bill for a long time
he 's fighting everything
we need him back
i just plain do n't trust him anymore
maybe you did n't hear what i said
i will not tolerate this infighting among the staff i warn you that
boss then i 'm afraid i ca n't continue working with bill
are you giving me an ultimatum lou
well if that 's what you want to call it
i did n't ever think it would come to this
i guess i am boss
i will not have any damned ultimatums put to me lou
i 'll accept your resignation
you sure got it
you 're one stubborn and stupid sonofabitch d.a. and you 're making one hell of a mistake
sad thing is the way it 's screwing up this country all these hippies running around on drugs the way young people look you ca n't tell a boy from a girl anymore
i saw a girl the other day she was pregnant you could see her whole belly and you know what she painted on it
love child
it 's fuckin outa control
values've gone to hell jim
course it figures when you got somebody like that polecat johnson in the white house
i sometimes feel things've gone downhill since john kennedy was killed senator
do n't get me started on that
those warren commission fellows were pickin gnat shit out of pepper
no one 's gon na tell me that kid did the shooting job he did from that damned bookstore
i thought the fbi test fired the rifle to make sure it could be done
sure three experts and not one of them could do it
they 're telling us oswald got off three shots with world class precision from a manual bolt action rifle in less than six seconds and accordin to his marine buddies he got maggie 's drawers he was n't any good
average man would be lucky to get two shots off and i tell ya the first shot would always be the best
here the third shot 's perfect
do n't make sense
and then they got that crazy bullet zigzagging all over the place so it hits kennedy and connally seven times
one pristine bullet
that dog do n't hunt
you know something always bothered me about that from day one and i ca n't put my finger on it
if i were investigatin i 'd round up the 100 best riflemen in the world and find out which ones were in dallas that day
you been duck hunting
i think oswald was a good old fashioned decoy
what 'd he say
i 'm just a patsy
out of the mouth of babes y'ask me
you think there were other men involved russell
there have been a number of reports in reputable news media time newsweek our own nbc that you have gone way beyond the legal means available to a prosecutor that you 've intimidated and drugged witnesses bribed them urged them to commit perjury
what is your response
your faith in the veracity of the major media is touching jerry
it indicates that the age of innocence is not yet over
but seriously jerry people are n't interested in jim garrison they want the hard evidence
they want to know why he was killed and what forces were opposed to
some people would say you 're paranoid
well if i am why is the government concealing evidence
are they
why would they
that 's exactly my question jerry
maybe i 'd better show you some pictures so you can begin to understand what i am talking about
pictures like this do n't show up on television
sure they do
the camera can pick this up
no it ca n't
jim garrison
yes
i 'm glad you came
i 'm sorry about the precautions
well i just hope it was worth my while mr
i could give you a false name but i wo n't
just call me x.
i 've already been warned by the agency mr. whoever
if this is another type of threat i do n't
i 'm not with the agency mr. garrison and i assume if you 've come this far what i have to say interests you
but i 'm not going to name names or tell you who or what i represent
except to say you 're close you 're closer than you think
i do n't
i ca n't believe it
they killed him because he wanted to change things
in our time in our country
kings are killed mr. garrison
politics is power nothing more
but do n't believe me
do n't trust me
do your own work your own thinking
the size of this is
beyond me
testify
no chance in hell mr. garrison
i 'd be arrested and gagged declared insane and hospitalized
maybe worse
you too
i can only give you background you got to find the foreground the little things
keep digging
y'know you 're the only person to ever bring a trial in the murder of john kennedy
that 's important it 's historic
i have n't yet
i do n't have much of a case
but you do n't have a choice anymore
you 've become a significant threat to the national security structure
they would 've killed you already but you got a lot of light on you
instead they 're gon na destroy your credibility they already have in many circles in this town
you 're some kinda ego crazed southern caricature to many folks
be honest the best chance you got is come up with a case something anything make arrests stir the shitstorm
you got ta hope to reach a point of critical mass where other people will come forward and the government will crack
remember fundamentally people are suckers for the truth and the truth is on your side bubba
i hope you get a break
well thanks for coming
you did n't get that break you needed but you went as far as any man could bubba
what can i do for you
just speculating i guess
how do you think it started
i think it started in the wind
money arms big oil pentagon people contractors bankers politicians like l.b.j. were committed to a war in southeast asia
as early as 61 they knew kennedy was going to change things
he was not going to war in southeast asia
who knows
probably some boardroom or lunchroom somewhere houston new york hell maybe bonn germany
who knows it 's international now
he 's done it before
other countries
lumumba in the congo trujillo the dominican republic he 's working on castro
no big deal
in september kennedy announces the texas trip
at that moment second oswalds start popping up all over dallas where they have the mayor and the cops in their pocket
y flies in the assassins maybe from the special camp we keep outside athens greece pros maybe some locals cubans maria hire separate teams
does it really matter who shot from what rooftop
part of the scenery
the assassins by now are dead or well paid and long gone
any chance of one of them confessing someday
... do n't think so
when they start to drool they get rid of 'em
these guys are proud of what they did
they did dealey plaza
they took out the president of the united states
that 's entertainment
and they served their country doing it
... and your general
... got promoted to two stars but he was never military you know always cia
went to vietnam lost his credibility when we got beat over there retired lives in virginia
i say hello to him when i see him at the supermarket
ever ask him
you never ask a spook a question
no point
he 'll never give you a straight answer
general y still thinks of himself of the handsome young warrior who loved this country but loved the concept of war more
his name
does it matter
another technician
but an interesting thing he was there that day in dealey plaza
you know how i know
that picture of yours
the hoboes
you never looked deep enough
i knew the man 20 years
that 's him
the way he walked
arms at his side military the stoop the haircut the twisted left hand the large class ring
what was he doing there
if anyone had asked him he 'd probably say protection but i 'll tell you i think he was giving some kind of okay signal to those hoboes they 're about to get booked and he 's telling 'em it 's gon na be okay they 're covered
and in fact they were you never heard of them again
... some story
the whole thing
it 's like it never happened
it never did
just think
just think
what happened to our country
to the world
because of that murder
vietnam racial conflict breakdown of law drugs thought control guilt assassinations secret government fear of the frontier
i keep thinking of that day tuesday the 26th the day after they buried kennedy l.b.j. was signing the memorandum on vietnam with ambassador lodge
dave ferrie you know about him
was he there often
often
he practically lived there
it was real cloak and dagger stuff
they called it operation mongoose
the idea was to train all these cuban exiles for another invasion of cuba
banister 's office was part of a supply line that ran from dallas through new orleans to miami stockpiling arms and explosives
where is banister in all this
banister was running his camp north of lake pontchartrain
ferrie handled a lot of the training
there was a shooting range and a lot of tropical terrain like in cuba
a few americans got trained too
nazi types
mercenaries
but ferrie was the craziest
like i said a fuckin nuthouse
and oswald
yeah he was there too
sometimes he 'd be meeting with banister with the door shut
other times he 'd be shooting the bull with ferrie
but he was there all right
anything more specific jack
it 's important
anyone else involved at banister 's level
there was one guy i do n't know big guy business guy white hair i saw him come into the office once
he looked out of place y'know like a society guy
ca n't remember his name
oswald was with him
clay something that was his name clay
bertrand
clay bertrand
yeah
that 's it
i do n't know
maybe it was n't
i got ta go
clay bertrand
he 's in the warren report
he tried to get oswald a lawyer
was kennedy ever discussed jack
sure
course they hated the sonofabitch but
the assassination jack
never
not with me sir never
listen i think i 'd better go
i said enough
i said all i 'm going to say
hold on jack
what 's the problem
what 's the problem
what 's the problem
do i need to spell it out for you mr. garrison
i better go
nobody knows what we 're talking about jack
you 're so naive mister
did n't someone say he did n't speak good russian
it 's a contradiction numa get used to them
the only explanation for the royal treatment is he did give them radar secrets
or fake secrets
even my own wife chief who 's wondering where i am
even your own wife numa
any of you want to quit do me a favor
put us out of our misery
no she could get hurt
if you believe what 's happening to these other people
she 's the best damn witness we have
i just do n't want to do it
what else
hate mail here
fan mail here
the bad news is the irs has just requested an audit on your income from this office
i expected that two months ago and they 're wasting their time
the bad news is the national guard has just asked me to resign after 18 years
well maybe that 's good news it was never as good as combat but this is
bill any more on oswald and shaw
sure sounds like he 's winning
he 'll never make it
if he wins they 'll kill him
he wants to avenge his brother
he 'll stop that war
no they 'll kill him before they let him become president
i do n't think so al
you remember the hemingway story the old man and the sea
the old fisherman manages to catch this great fish a fish so huge he has to tie it to the side of the boat to get it back in
but by the time he reached shore the fish had long since been picked apart by sharks and nothing was left but the skeleton
then what are we going through all this trouble for
it 's a means to an end
this war has two fronts in the court of law we hope against the odds to nail clay shaw on a conspiracy charge
in the court of public opinion it could take another 25 or 30 years for the truth to come out but at least we 're going to strike the first blow
welcome mr. miller
jim garrison
would you care for some coffee
yes thank you mr. garrison
your coffee 's almost turkish down here but i could get used to it
i 'm glad you could find time to see me
i flew down from denver this morning on my private jet
yes your letter indicated you were in he oil business up there
i 've done quite well in denver mr. garrison but i have to admire someone like you and i have the means to back up what i say
we can use all the support we can get
i think these might interest you
they 've been enlarged and show a lot of detail
splendid love to see them
where were you
europe pacific
germany
you were lucky
i spent three years in the pacific
i 've never seen an avenue with such a profusion of bail bonding companies
why is that
i imagine because this is the criminal district court building this is an enlargement of a potential shooter standing behind the picket fence
we
i propose you accept an appointment to the bench in federal district court and move into a job worthy of your talent
do you have any idea do you have any conception of how easily such an appointment can be arranged
and what would i have to do
stop your investigation
it was a magnificent effort but it 's over and done with
the press is already on your behind and that 's only the beginning my boy only the beginning
how long do you think it would take me to be appointed
hello
is this jim garrison 's daughter
yes
virginia or elizabeth
virginia
virginia you 're a lucky little girl
your daddy has entered you in a beauty contest
would you like to be in a beauty contest
that sounds fun
i need some information from you then
how old are you
six
and how tall are you
and you get of from school at 3 every day
yes
do you walk home
uh huh
then do you understand that i can not tell the truth here
in dallas
that there are people here who do not want me to tell the truth
who do not want me to have a retrial
mr. ruby i really ca n't see why you ca n't tell us now
when are you going back to washington sir
i am going back very shortly after we finish this hearing i am going to have some lunch
can i make a statement
if you request me to go back to washington with you right now that is if you want to hear further testimony from me can you do that
can you take me with you
no that could not be done mr. ruby
there are a good many things involved in that
what are they
well the public attention it would attract
and we have no place for you there to be safe we 're not law enforcement officials and many things are at stake in this affair mr. ruby
but if i am eliminated there wo n't be any way of knowing
consequently a whole new form of government is going to take over this country and i know i wo n't live to see you another time
my life is in danger here
do i sound screwy
well i do n't know what can be done mr. ruby because i do n't know what you anticipate we will encounter
then you do n't stand a chance mr. chief justice you have a lost cause
all i want is a lie detector test and you refuse to give it to me
because as it stands now and the truth serum how do you pronounce it pentothal whatever it is
they will not give it to me because i want to tell the truth
and then i want to leave this world
can i help you
yes you have a suit i 've had my eye on
this looks pretty good on me
are you kidding it looks great
you wear this to a business meeting you 're the badass in the room
but you can go out dancing in this too
it 's a total power suit
i think i 'm gon na just get this for today
i 'm in kind of a hurry
would you mind ringing this up while i change out of it
not a problem
thanks
i do n't know
maybe it 's a language problem
anita you ever cause this much heartache over something that could easily be avoided i 'll never write you again
you understand
i understand
i mean it
i do n't care how many times your mother calls or how much she cries
i understand
then say yes max
i understand
yes max i understand
so you 're gon na call karen tomorrow
i 'll call her
wo n't forget
i wo n't forget
what the fuck can i say
i 'm serious man
what the fuck can i say
thank you
thank you
thank you
who was there for your ass
you were there for me
who
you
you see it works like this
you get your ass in trouble i get your ass out
that 's my job
and i do n't mind tellin ya nigga it 's steady work
i 'm still scared as a motherfucker ordell
they talkin like they serious 'bout me doin' that machine gun time
naw man
they just tryin to put a fright in your ass
if that 's what they want to do they 're doin' it
how old is that machine gun shit
three years
three years
that crime 's old man
they ai n't got room in prison for all the motherfuckers out there killin people
how they gon na find room for you
that 's not what they 're tellin me
that 's why they call it fuckin with ya
now you wanna hear how we retaliate
hey c'mon in man
i was just -- you know -- smokin a fatty watchin tv
naw man
i got ta be someplace
i was kinda hopin you could come with me
what 'd ya mean
look i hate to be the kinda nigga does a nigga a favor -- then bam -- hits a nigga up for a favor in return
but i 'm afraid i got ta be that kinda nigga
what
i need a favor
that requires me goin' out tonight
a bit
aaaaawww man i was n't plannin on goin' no place
it 's twelve o'clock man
i 'm home i 'm high --
why the fuck you at home
cause i spent ten thousand dollars gittin your ass home
look i got ta problem
i need help and you can help me
what 's the problem
well it ai n't so much a problem a a situation
remember i sold those three m-60 machine guns outta the five i got
uh huh
i 'm gon na sell the other two tonight
this group of koreans in koreatown have started a neighborhood watch kinda thing
and they want a few weapons so the neighborhood niggas know they mean business
so i 'm gon na sell 'em my two machine guns tonight
only problem i ai n't never dealt with these koreans before
now i ai n't worried
asians are by and large real dependable
they do n't want no trouble
you might argue about price but you ai n't got ta worry about them shootin you in the back
but i got me kind of a rule
never do business with nobody you ai n't never done business with before without backup
that 's why i need you backup
man i ai n't ready to be goin' out nowhere --
let me finish
can i finish
go ahead
fuck that shit man
i ai n't shootin anybody
what the fuck i tell you
you do n't hafta shoot nobody
just hold the gun
they 'll get the idea
i ai n't gittin in that trunk
we 're only goin' to koreatown
you 'll be in there -- ten minutes
uh uh
i ai n't riding in that trunk no minutes
why do n't i just ride with you
you ca n't ride with me
the surprise effect is ninety percent of it
well i 'm sorry man but i ai n't gittin in that trunk
i ca n't believe you do me this way
i ai n't doin' you no way
i just ai n't climbin in that trunk
i got a problem with small places
well my ass has got a problem spending ten thousand dollars of my own goddam money to get ungrateful peanuthead niggas outta jail but i do it --
look man i know i owe you --
well if you owe me git your ass in the trunk
i wanna help you but i do n't wanna be locked in the trunk of no car
you think i wanted to spend ten thousand dollars on your ass
why were you with him
i went to give him his refund so he would n't have to come here
how 'd you know where he was
i found out
and you did n't tell the police
i told jackie and jackie said you wanted him
i 'd say there 's about oh fifty thousand dollars here
what would you say ray
that looks like fifty thousand dollars from here
you got a good lawyer
can she afford a good one is the question
otherwise she 'll be in sybill brand three weeks easy before the public defender gets around to her
ever heard of a fella named beaumont livingston
great you 're here
hey jackie
what 's going on
she wants to make a deal
she sound scared
she almost sounds scared
what 's she want
she wants to go back to work
what 's she willing to give us
she has n't one into specifics yet she 's been waiting for you
she knows it 's my case
she ai n't said it but she 's not stupid she knows it 's you who wants her
we are
do n't worry about it
every step of this goes in my report
i am now taking a manila envelope from the subject 's flight bag
the envelope contains currency
all the same denomination one hundred- dollar bills
now i 'm counting it
what time do you have to be there
can i have a word with you
sure
would i mind
do i have a choice
you have the right to say no
and i have the right to make you wait here with ray while i go get a warrant
and if i do n't want to go through all that trouble i could just take you in on suspicion
suspicion of what
this is your money
if i were to tell you no it is n't
you should know if you bring in anything over ten thousand you have to declare it
you forgot or what
you could get a two hundred and fifty thousand dollar fine plus two years in prison
now you want to talk to us about it or you want to talk to customs
i 'm not saying another word
hey this is my office
there 's no smoking
arrest me
i 'm not a loser
oh you 're both
in 1985 you were flying for twa and got busted for carrying drugs
you were carrying them for a pilot husband of yours
he did time and you got off
but that ended your career with the big airlines
cut to thirteen years later
you 're forty four years of age
you 're flying for the shittiest little shuttle fucking piece of shit mexican airline that there is
where you make a whopping twelve thousand dollars a year
that ai n't a hulluva lot to show for a twenty year career
and to top it off you 're going to jail
now true the judge even with your prior will probably only give you a year or two
but this does n't seem like the time of life you got years to throw away
now we do n't like trying losers like they 're criminals
but in the absence of a criminal we will try you
now was n't this money given to you by an american living in mexico by the name of cedric walker
help yourself
while you 're at it let me see what else is in there
you mind
my pocketbook
what 's in it
beauty products
what 's this
that 's my diet shit
help us do what
help you get ordell robbie
but now you 're telling us now you do
course i do -- i deliver money for him
you do n't want much do you
can you do it or not
how was your flight
fine
bet you 're happy to be working again
four thirty
i 'm meeting a woman
what 's her name
he would n't say
you gon na follow her
she leaves somebody'll be on her
but you 're not going to stop her
i can give you a lift home if you 'd like
okay
are you really a bail bondsman
who do you think i am
i gave you my card there
can i see your i.d.
you 're serious
you gain weight
ten pounds
i lose it and put it back on
that 's why i do n't quit
if i ca n't fly anymore i 'm gon na have a bitch of a time gettin my brand
what 's your brand
davidoffs
i get 'em in mexico
they 're hard to find here
i was locked up with the last two getting legal advice from a woman who was in for bustin her boyfriend 's head open with a baseball bat
was she helpful
she was more helpful than the fuckin public defender
i do n't know -- i guess what i need is a lawyer find out what my options are
you know i figured out the other day i 've written something like fifteen thousand bonds since i 've been in the business
i 'd say about eighty percent of them were at least drug related
if you want i can help you look at your options
you 're not tired of it
i am as a matter of fact
what have they told you
so far i 've been told i can cooperate and get probation maybe
or i can stand mute and get as much as five years
does that sound right
i 'd say if you 're tried and found guilty you wo n't get more than a year and a day
that 's state time
prison
shit
but they wo n't want to take you to trial
they 'll offer you simple possession a few months of county time and a year or two probation
how 'bout another
sure
you know who put the dope in your bag
yeah but that 's not what this was about
they were fuckin waitin for my ass
they knew i had that money they even knew the amount
the one who searched my bag from l.a.p.d. dargus hardly even looked at it
oh i 'd say there 's fifty thousand here
what would you say
but all they could do was threaten me and hand me over to customs and i could tell they did n't want to do that
they wanted you to tell them what you know
i had 'em too
i burnt those two starky and hutch motherfuckers down
then their asses lucked out and found that coke
what did they want to know
who gave me the money and who i was giving it to
and some guy they found in a trunk with his head blown off
said it was him who told them 'bout me
that would be beaumont livingston
that 's him
how do you know 'em
i wrote him on monday
they found him dead on tuesday
ordell pick up his bond
same as you
ten thousand
the federal agent kinda half hinted ordell might of done beaumont
you mentioned a guy from l.a.p.d. but you did n't mention the federal
i did n't
no you did n't
what branch
ray nicolet with alcohol tobacco and firearms
he 's the one who wants you
it was the other guy who busted me
'cause if he busted you you 'd play hell bonding out of federal court
he does n't want you mad at him he wants you to tell him what you know
he uses you to get a line on ordell make a case then take him federal
you know what ordell 's into
i have a pretty good idea
ordell ai n't no bootlegger and i doubt he 's smugglin cuban cigars
so that only leaves one thing an a.t.f. man would be interested in
i used to bring over ten thousand at a time
that 's the legal limit so i never brought more than that
how many trips did you make
with ten thousand
nine
he 's got that kinda money
it 's all in lock boxes in a mexico bank
but he 's got a problem
he 's -- what do you call it when you got money but do n't have cash
cash poor
that 's it
he 's cash poor
he kept on me till i finally said okay
i 'll bring whatever fits in a nine by- twelve envelope
i got paid five hundred dollars and his friend mr. walker in mexico gave me the envelope
if you knew bringing anything over ten thousand was against the law why not pack a hundred grand
whatever it was had to fit in my bag and not hit you in the face if the bag was opened
this ai n't solvin my problem
i got ta figure out a way to either keep my job or get out of trouble
i 'm off today but if i ca n't leave the country i 'm out of a job
and if i do n't got a job i ca n't hire a lawyer
ask a.t.f. they might give you permission
yeah if i cooperate
well jackie you got caught you 're gon na have to give 'em something
but if all i can give 'em is ordell 's name -- i do n't really know shit about what he does or how he does it -- that do n't give me much to bargain with
give 'em what you got
offer to help
show a willingness to be helpful
you want to stay out of jail do n't you
you get a chance to use it
i felt a lot safer having it
my milk went bad when i was in jail
black 's fine
thanks but i have my own now
you went out this morning and bought a gun
what i could n't hear you
you went out this morning and bought a gun
somebody loan it to you
yeah
want to hear some music
sure
i could n't wait till i got home last night and wash my hair
it looks nice
you never got into the whole cd revolution
i got a few
but i ca n't afford to start all over again
i got too much time and money invested in my records
this is pretty
uh huh
who is this
the delfonics
76
74 i think
it 's nice
how do you get it out
same way i been doin' but first they got to let me go back to work
you 're gon na offer to set him up
if i get let off
otherwise fuck 'em
it 's very possible ordell 's killed somebody
i ai n't goin' to jail and i ai n't doin' that probation thing again
how do you feel about getting old
you 're not old
you look great
i 'm asking how you feel
does it bother you
it 's not really something i think about
really
okay i 'm a little sensitive about my hair
it started falling out ten years ago
so i did something about it
how 'd you feel about it
i 'm fine with it or i would n't of done it i did it to feel better about myself and i do
when i look in the mirror it looks like me
it 's different with men
you know i ca n't really feel too sorry for you in that department
my ass ai n't the same
bigger
yeah
does something else worry you
i just feel like i 'm always starting over
you said how many bonds you wrote
fifteen thousand
well i 've flown seven million miles
and i 've been waitin on people almost twenty years
the best job i could get after my bust was cabo air which is about the worst job you can get in this industry
i make about sixteen thousand with retirement benefits ai n't worth a damn
and now with this arrest hanging over my head i 'm scared
if i lose my job i got ta start all over again but i got nothin' to start over with
i 'll be stuck with whatever i can get
and that scares me more than ordell
well hello
surprise
i walked right past you
i know ignoring me
what 're you up to
catching a movie
what 'd ya see
american president
how was it
pretty good
me and annette bening are goin steady
oh are you
does she know that
no
i do n't believe she 's ever heard of me
but that does n't mean we 're not going steady
does it happen to all men
well i 'd never be so bold as to speak for all men but as or myself and a few of my friends that 's definitely the case
there 's a lot of actresses out there you like and there 's some you have crushes on
but there 's always one who you love
and with her it 's sorta like going steady
and annette 's it for you
for now
these relationships never last too long
who was your girl before annette
sandra bullock
you know her
yeah she 's the girl who drove the bus in speed
she 's cute
she 's adorable
but i had to end it
why
i 'm old enough to be her father
how old 's annette
i do n't care
he tries to act cool
no harm in that
he 's a young guy havin' fun being a cop
i know the type trust me on this
he 's more interested in ordell than the money
if he 's gon na do anything suspect it 'll be cutting corners to get the conviction but he would n't walk off with the money
it 's evidence
what about you max
what
if i was in nicolet 's place
no i mean you right now
not it you were somebody else
if i saw a way to walk off with a shopping bag full of money would i take it
you know where it came from
it 's not like it 's anybody 's life savings
it would n't even be missed
a half a million dollars will always be missed
you 're avoiding the question
okay sure
i might be tempted
especially now since i 'm getting out of the bail bonds business
i have to stand behind all my active bonds but i 'm not writing any new ones
why
a lot of reasons
but the main one would be i 'm tired of it
when did you decide
it 's been a long time coming
i finally made up my mind -- i guess it was thursday
hi i 'm max cherry
your bail bondsman
the day you got me out of jail
yeah that night i went to pick up a guy
i hear he 's staying at this house so i sneak in wait for him to come home
wait a minute
after we were together you went and snuck into a guy 's house
uh huh
got another gun and a stun gun
and went to this guy 's house in el monte and i waited for him
what do you do when he comes home
shoot him with the stun gun
while he 's incapacitated cuff him take 'em to county
you do that
that 's my job
did you do it that night
he never came home
but i 'm sitting on the couch in the dark holding my stun gun and the whole house smells of mildew -- so after a couple hours i think what am i doing here
nineteen years of this shit
so i made up my mind that 's it
and is that it
more or less
i 'm not sure you answered my question
which one
if you had a chance unemployed now to walk off with a half million dollars would you take it
i believe i said i 'd be tempted
do n't even think about it
you could get yourself killed go to prison
what if i 've figured a way
the feds
it 's evidence
it may be evidence once they get their hands on it but right now it 's only money
you 're rationalizing
that 's what you do to go through with the shit you start
you rationalize
i can do this max i know i can
but i ca n't do it without you
how 'd you find out
all winston had to do was ask around
ordell 's living in long beach with a woman junkie
how does winston find him if a.t.f. and all the local police ca n't
people talk to winston
he 's street same as them they trust him
they get busted they know somebody who can bond them out
i thought i might drop in on him
he 'll no doubt be surprised to see me
he 's liable to shoot you
on the phone i told him i have the ten thousand he put up for your bond
i could bring the money and the papers for him to sign
walk out and call the sheriff 's department
ray wants him
everybody wants him he 's a homicide suspect
it does n't matter who brings him in he 's gon na name you as an accessory
that 's why a.t.f. 's got ta make the case
i 'm their witness
they would n't have a case without me
if it 's his word against mine who are they gon na believe
it 's not that simple
it never was so i 'm not gon na start worrying about it now
look ray more or less believes my story and he more or less does n't care
all he really gives a shit about is getting ordell
so how do we give ordell to nicolet
get ordell to come to your office
set him up
uh huh
tell him you want to see him
tell him i want to give him his money
why
i 've chickened out
i 'm afraid of him
he 'll like that
what do you tell nicolet
ordell called and wants to meet me and i 'm scared
we get ordell to come to my office
nicolet -- is he already there or does he come busting in while we 're chatting
he 's already there
what if he hears something he 's not supposed to
well we do n't let that happen now do we
i got your package
it was fun getting a half a million dollars in the mail
less ten percent
yeah your fee
i had to figure that out since there was n't no note
only this is n't a bail bond max
i hesitated taking that much
you worked for it -- if you 're sure that 's all you want
i 'm sure
i saw ray the other day
boy is he pissed he missed all the excitement
what 's he doing
he 's on to a new thing
he 's after a guy who owns a gun shop he says is woefully and wantonly selling assault rifles to minors
he says he 's gon na take him down if it 's the last thing he does
did you tell him you were leaving
i told him i might
i 'd feel a whole lot better if you took some more money
you 'll get over that
where 're you going
spain
madrid or barcelona
start off in madrid
ever been there
wanna go
thanks but you have a good time
sure i ca n't twist your arm
thank you for saying that but no
my business
i thought you were tired of your business
i 'm just tired in general
are you scared of me
you tell those guys they 'll have to do one helluva lot better than that before i 'll even say hi to them
well that 's the state 's offer
if you plead to possession and tell l.a.p.d. what they want to know your bond will be set at one thousand dollars
if you do n't l.a.p.d. will request one at twenty five thousand based on your prior record and risk of flight
if you do n't post it or do n't know anyone who can you 'll spend six to eight weeks in county before your arraignment comes up
who 's side are you on
i beg your pardon
what if i plead guilty
and cooperate
you might get probation
if i do n't cooperate
with the prior
you could get anywhere from a year to five depending on the judge
you want to think about it
you got two minutes before we 're up
he say we like the same thing as married
do you live together
most of the times
not every day
sometimes every day for a while
then you do n't see him for a few days
yes'm
you know what 's in the bag you 're taking
he say is a surprise
well sheronda it was nice talking to you
look that shit ai n't mine
it is n't enough for trafficking but how 'bout posession with the intent to distribute
we 'll just be a minute
can i smoke
thanks for waiting jackie
now tell me what can we do for you
i need permission to leave the country so i keep my job
we can look into that
i need it tomorrow
if i do n't show up for work tomorrow i 'm fired
you know what we want
if i 'm working i can help you
oh so now you know him
you never asked me if i did or not
no shit
you know how he makes his money
he sells guns
you ever see him sell guns
no
then how do you know he sells guns
he told me
besides why else would an a.t.f. man be after him
how can you help us
short of wearing a wire i 'll do everything i can to help you throw his ass in jail
and in exchange for my help i need permission to leave the country and immunity
this is a.t.f. agent ray nicolet jackie brown ordell robbie money exchange trial run
it 's three p.m. july 4th 1997
the location is the parking structure at lax
what are you doing
i 'm recording this
i thought you were going to let this one through
the envelope contains ten thousand dollars
the subject will be delivering the currency in a
a broadway shopping bag
you said that the last time
well it 's true is n't it
after this is buttoned up we could meet someplace else
what do you think
we could if i 'm not in jail
oh that 's taken care of
i called the state attorney 's office
you were no filed this morning in circuit court
that 's fifty thousand huh
it does n't look like that much
i was told ten thousand in each pack
you did n't count it
i never have
it 's not my money
ever been tempted
what
to put one of these in my pocket
uh huh
if i did i 'd have to give you one would n't i
or we could take what we want
no one knows how much there is except us right
yes
all those things are true
after all it do n't belong to nobody right
that would be one point of view
yeah well it 's not a point of view that a.t.f. shares
once we make it evidence it belongs to us
you are now officially out of trouble
do n't do nothing stupid now
how can i do anything if i 'm being watched every second
i 'm glad you realize that
saves me the trouble of pointing it out to you
put this in your shopping bag
it 's what i expect to find when i look in sheronda 's
comprende
si
i thought i did
you did n't
i would think with all this on your mind you 'd wait till after
i got there early
i 've had my eye on this suit -- wait let 's start over
i got there early
the idea was to try on the suit see if i liked it
if i did get them to wrap it up and change back into my uniform
that 's what sheronda 's expecting me to wear
go meet sheronda give her the bag with fifty thousand and go home
but you did n't do that
because i did n't have it
ray i swear melanie came in and grabbed it
and someone killed her for it
where 's the bag she gave you
she did n't give me one
i told you before melanie was n't part of the plan
ordell must of told her to do it
she bursts in grabs the shopping bag and takes off
what am i supposed to do go after her
i 'm in my fucking underwear
i had to get dressed before i could do anything
so i put this back on 'cause could put this on faster than i could my uniform
you took the time to pay the saleswoman
i had to
i was frantic
i did n't know what to do
what did you do after that
i went looking for you
i went straight to the bookstore 'cause that 's where you were last time but you were n't there
how the hell else am i supposed to let anybody know what happened
you did n't tell me how to do that did you
i knew i was under surveillance so when i could n't spot anybody i started yelling
there was a guy with melanie
not in the fitting room
we had our agent on you
she sees a blonde come out of the fitting room carrying a robinson's may bag and tussle with a tough looking white guy
the white guy takes the shopping bag and they go
this guy with melanie that was louis gara
i did n't see him
i was in my underwear
if it was a white guy it was probably louis
he kill melanie
it 's possible
you 're saying you do n't have any idea what happened to that fifty thousand
i have no idea
you 'd take a polygraph on it
if it 'll make you happy
i sure hope you have n't done anything dumb jackie
louis gara 's dead
l.a.p.d. found him dead in a car on ninth
and we 've lost ordell
i thought you were watching him
we were and we lost him
he walked into a strip bar sometime around three thirty and never came out
the bar was on ninth less than a mile- and a half from where louis was found dead
it looks like louis 's friend shot him twice at point blank range
so what happens now
we pick up ordell
we 've got three murders we can link him to
we have the storage unit where he keeps his guns by tomorrow we 'll have a search warrant to go in and get him
and we have you
what about me
what about you
do you think i took some of that money
i have no evidence of your taking anything
you did n't pay for your snazzy new suit with marked bills i was glad to see that
you 've been helping us out you gave us melanie and louis
melanie had a packet of marked bills stuffed in her shorts when they found her which goes a long way backing up your story
oh hi
buy ya a beer
i 'm waiting for the phone
good luck
that guy 's been in there since i got here
well i guess i better look for another one then
thanks anyway
how long you been with ordell
this time
almost a year
i 've known him forever
what were you two fighting about
he told me to go outside
you may leave us now
it 's all part of his pathetic attempt to be the man
you know mr. walker do n't you
mr. walker 's my buddy
ask him about ordell
that coke was yours was n't it
he said he did n't know about it
you believe that
yeah well i guess you have to trust him
i 'd have second thoughts on that but then i know 'em
he killed a guy who works for him the other day
beaumont livingston
you already knew that
kinda
so tell me
having all that money in your flight bag -- is it tempting
you think i 'm kidding
dreaming
you know how easy it would be
he wo n't be anywhere near that mall
pull one more switch up front
that 's it
half a million dollars
need help
keep it between us girls
what 's that fucker ever done for us
i do n't think so but thanks for the beer
jackie
hi melanie
are you getting that black suit
yeah do you like it
it looks good on you
do you got something for me
you betcha
i put a little cherry on top
you 're right
what the hell he ever do for us
thanks
now be careful with that bag
you do n't want it ripping open on you in the middle of the store
how you doing ms. jackie
i was expecting you
come in
for what
who you think got your ass outta jail
the same guy who put me in thanks a lot
hey you get caught with blow that 's your business
i'magine they asked who you givin it to too
they asked
and what was your answer
i said i wanted to talk to a lawyer
you positive about that
you were n't nervous and let something slip by mistake
if you did i ai n't mad i just got ta know
beaumont livingston
i knew it
and they asked if i knew mr. walker
yeah
i did n't tell 'em anything
this fella beaumont they say what happened to him
they told me
what do you think it is
i think it 's a gun pressing against my dick
you thought right
now take your hands from around my throat nigga
what the hell you doin'
shut your ass up and grab the wall
i just came here to talk
way i see it me and you only got one thing to talk about
what you willing to do for me
let 's get realistic baby
sooner or later they 're gon na get around to offering me a plea deal and you know that
that 's why you came here to kill me
baby i did n't --
it 's okay
i forgive you
now let 's say if i tell on you i walk
and if i do n't i go to jail
yeah
one hundred thousand put in an escrow account in my name if i 'm convicted up to a year or put on probation
if i have to do more than a year you pay another hundred thousand
i got a problem
all your money 's in mexico
yeah
i been thinkin about that too and i got me a idea
i 'll talk to the cops tomorrow and tell you if it 's on
talk to you tomorrow
the cockatoo inn
the cockatoo inn
where 's that
it 's right on hawthorne boulevard and manhattan beach boulevard
it 's red brick
oh wait you mean that place that has the big sign with a rooster on it
it 's a cockatoo
i bet you come here on a saturday night you need nigga repellent keep 'em off your ass
i do okay
you a fine lookin woman jackie
i bet you do a damn sight better than okay
you think anybody followed you
i do n't think so but it do n't really matter
they know i 'm meeting you
how the fuck they know that
i told them
... i make two deliveries
the first one with ten thousand like a dry run
they watch it
see how it works
then we do a second delivery when i bring in the half mill
naw naw that 's too much exposure
i ai n't goin anywhere near that money
you do n't have to
i told 'em you 're real careful
you never pick up money yourself
you always send someone and i never know who it is
that 's a good idea
if you just listen you 'll see it 's a damn good idea
the first time i do it they 're lurking about
they see me hand the ten thousand to someone
who
i do n't know
one of your friends
a woman
if you want
yeah i think a woman
the next trip when i come with all the money it 'll look like i hand it to the same one i did before
but you do n't
no i give it to someone else first
and they follow the wrong one thinkin she 's bringing it to me
that 's the idea
so we need two people two women
can you cover that
i got the woman covered
where you thinkin about doin' this
i was thinkin the del amo mall
in the food court
i suppose you see a piece of this for yourself
well it 's my plan
we 're in this together
yeah but it 's my money and i do n't need me a partner
i ai n't your partner i 'm your manager
i 'm managing to get your money out of mexico into america in your hands and i 'm managing to do all this under the nose of the cops
that makes me your manager and managers get fifteen percent
managers get ten percent
that 's an agent
manager 's get fifteen percent
i 'll give ya ten
plus the same deal as before
i can do that
the money 's in a broadway shopping bag
i get some food and sit down here in the food court
then your girl comes -- you got somebody yet
uh huh
who
what 'd you care
look it 's my ass facin the penitentiary
you send some hard- headed roc whore and she fucks things up
i ai n't gon na send no roc whore
the woman 's cool i promise
drink
i need to talk to you alone
i do n't want no more fuckin surprises
we do this the way i laid it out or we do n't do it at all
what the hell you talkin bout
sheronda passin the money onto someone else that 's what the hell i 'm talkin 'bout
how do you know she did that
i was there i saw her do it
well you were n't supposed to be there
i know but i hung around 'cause i figured you 'd try an pull some shit like this
now hold on there
i ai n't pullin no shit
it 's my money i can do whatever the fuck i wanna do with it
not when it 's my ass on the line you do n't
we do this my way or fuck it
nicolet and dargus stop me at the airport and mark the bills
man i do n't like that part
it washes off
i tell them we 're doing it the same way as before
they 'll follow sheronda
i hate the idea of leaving her for a fall
she wo n't have no problems 'cause she do n't know nothin'
are you sure she do n't know about the money
she do n't know shit about the money
what does she think she 's gettin
i told her this is a game us rich folks play exchanging gifts
like a scavenger hunt
she did n't know what that was neither
no answer
no you gon na give her a robinson's may bag this time
right the one simone gives me
simone and i 'll make the switch at robinson's may
she knows what i look like
she saw you with sheronda
so simone goes to the dress department with her robinson's may bag
designer clothes
she waits for you to go in the place where you try things on
the fitting room
there 's a sign over the door
so you come out with her robinson's may bag go meet sheronda
simone peeks out waits for my man louis here to give her a signal nobody 's watchin
she leaves the store gets in her car -- mission accomplished
where you gon na be during all this
i 'm gon na be sittin at the titty bar in downtown l.a. till my man over here calls me and gives me the o.k. sign
who 's paging you
ray the a.t.f. guy
that works on my nerves you bein so buddy buddy with him
if i was n't this would n't work
now once i deliver i 'll have to trust you
well i 've been trusting you all this time have n't i
we agreed on ten percent of what you bring in and that 's what you gon na get
it 's boring is n't it
i can sit through it once
he thinks he 's joe gunn now
i 'm impressed
he knows a lot
he 's just repeating shit he overheard
he ai n't any more a gun expert than i am
want a hit
sure
when did you get out of jail
four days ago
where at
susanville
how long
two months shy of four years
four years
uh huh
what for
bank robbery
really i 'm impressed
is it ready to go
yeah there 's another hit left
you okay
yeah i 'm just gettin old
i ca n't smoke or laugh now it seems without coughing
coughing opens up the capillaries
when you cough you 're getting air -- in this case smoke -- to parts of the lung that do n't normally get used
coughing 's good -- gets ya higher
my dad coughs when he smokes all the time
want a metrix
what 's a metrix
it 's like this major meal in a shake you drink instead of having a big meal
it 's a diet thing
no it 's what body builders drink to beef up
no thanks
which one
the roller disco one
fourteen
were you a disco guy
no
c'mon do n't lie
i do n't like dancing
did you ever go i one
i went to a few just to meet women
but i do n't like to dance and it 's so fuckin loud
during that whole scene i just drank in bars
who did n't make the cut
that 's a picture of me in japan
you been to japan
i lived there for about nine months
you lived in japan when
about five years ago
who 's arm is that
that 's the guy i lived with
his name was
hirosh
must of made quite an impression
i never got to know him really
i could n't speak japanese and his english was terrible
but i could n't say anything because his english was better than my japanese
that sounds like a problem
not really
we did n't have much to say to each other anyway
i never got to know him that well but i knew enough to know i was n't missing much
i keep that because of all the fuckin time i was there that 's the only picture i got of me in japan
that 's japan
wanna fuck
sure
yeah that really hit the spot
now that 's over let 's get to know each other
is it dead
yeah
well so far he is
but you have to admit he 's not too bright
i would n't go so far as to say that
he killed a man worked for him the other night
so what are you trying to tell me
i should get out of here
that 's not what i 'm saying at all
you know where he went
no
he went to meet that stewardess
does that bother you
please
you live with him
i live here
he drops in and out
he tell you about that half million dollars he 's got in mexico
uh huh
course he did he tells everybody who 'll listen
that 's what he 's doin' with this stewardess
he 's scheming how he can get it over here
and your point is
let him and that stewardess get that money over here
uh huh
... and just take it from him
that 's a nice outfit on her
i 'm gon na go over and look at this michi moon display
just stay right fuckin here all right
are you sweating
what are you doin'
i 'm getting out of here
what do you think
lemme have the bag
fuck you
i can carry it
goddam you
gimme that bag
watch it dipshit
you wanna rip the fuckin bag
gimme that bag before i knock you out and take it
i 'm carrying it
okay you got it
just take a chill pill for christ sake
is it this aisle lou is
yeah down the end
you sure
is it this aisle or the next one over
this one
you sure
i mean it
do n't say one fuckin word
okay lou is
thanks baby
who 's your partner
i 'm going to wait in the car
sure
we almost done ai n't we
take the keys man
listen to music
which one is for the car
this one 's for the ignition
but you got ta hit this thing to shut the alarm off and unlock the door
what do i do
you ai n't got to do nothing
just point at it and push the button
you 'll hear the car go bleep
that means the alarm 's off and the doors are open
okay
now play the volume as loud as you want but do n't touch my levels
i got them set just the way i want 'em
louis my man
watcha doin'
oh i dunno
watching tv
whatcha watchin
nothin' really
just kinda goin' back and forth
they had some black girl from some black show on jay leno
i watched that for a bit but i kept flippin channels cause i did n't know who she was
guess where i am
i dunno
i know you do n't know
i said guess
the moon -- i dunno
i 'm talkin to you from the comfy- cozy interior of an oldsmobile parked outside your nasty ass welfare motel
you 're outside
uh huh
c'mon in
naw man
i just told you i 'm comfortable
i ai n't about to walk into that roach motel and get uncomfortable
you bring your ass out here
i 'm in my underwear
then put your goddam drawers on and get your ass out here
i got somethin' to show you
who was that
that was beaumont
who was beaumont
an employee i had to let go
what did he do
he put himself in a situation where he was gon na have to do ten years in the penetentiary that 's what he did
and if you know beaumont you know there ai n't no way in hell he can do no ten years
and if you know that you know beaumont 's gon na go any goddam thing beaumont can to keep from doin' those ten years including telling the federal government everything they want to know about my ass
now that my friend is a clear case of him or me
and you best believe it ai n't gon na be me
you know what i 'm sayin
you gon na come in on this with me you got ta be prepared to go all the way
i got me so far over a half a million dollars sittin in lockboxes in a bank in cabo san lucas
me and mr. walker make us one more delivery i 'm gon na have me over a million
you think i 'm gon na let this little cheese eatin nigga here fuck that up
shit you better think again
fore i let this deal get fucked up i 'll shoot that nigga in the head and ten niggas look just like em
understand what i 'm sayin
yeah
so we on the same page then
i follow
i did n't look like a bum
but you did have a salvation army- thing going
how much is there
over half million dollars worth of merchandise
can i ask you about melanie
sure
what 's your relationship
she one of the women i got set up
i got melanie in hermosa beach
i rent simone a small house in compton and about four blocks away i got me this nineteen year old country girl named sheronda
i found her waitin for a bus two days outta alabama barefoot country as a chicken coop
took her to my house in compton told her it was hollywood
she believed you
hell yeah
to her dumb country ass compton is hollywood
close as she 's ever been anyway
i still do n't understand why you keep her around
i told you man
she my fine little surfer gal
uh huh
hang it up she 's on her way
you got ta listen to this
this involves you
well you the one in motherfuckin charge
well she keeps saying in a minute
go in there snatch her by the hair and drag her big ass out
this is my goddam money we 're talking about
get your ass out the door
it 's louis
did you get it
i got it
listen there 's something else i have to tell you
when i see you
pick me up at sam 's
you count the money
i have n't even looked at it yet it 's still in the shopping bag
melanie must be dyin to see it
louis
that 's what i got to talk to you about
you see melanie was giving me a hard time --
not now pick me up
you keep drivin down ninth to where they got all them car dealerships
we 're gon na leave this heap in a parking lot and get one the cops do n't know about
hey where 's melanie
that 's what i got ta tell you
she bugged me the whole time
got pissy with me 'cause i would n't let her carry the bag
started running her fuckin mouth
i could n't remember right away when we came out where the car was parked so she got on me about that
is it this aisle lou- is is it that one
she was totally fuckin with my nerves
so what you left her there
i shot her
you shot melanie
twice
in the parking lot
could n't talk to her
you know how she is
you could n't just hit her
maybe
but at that moment
i dunno
you shot her twice
uh huh
so you 're sure she 's dead
pretty sure
where did you shoot her
in the chest and stomach
well if you had to do it you had to do it
what we do n't want is that bitch surviving on us
anybody but that woman
louis
what
where 's the rest of it
how much it there
maybe forty maybe not that much
you said five hundred and fifty
so you light ai n't you
you light about a half a million
look that 's the bag she came out with
she never even put her hand in it and neither did i.
came outta where
the fitting room
it went down exactly the way it was supposed to
how long was she in there
maybe a minute
she came right out
louis you tellin me the truth
look i swear to fucking god she came out with that bag and i took it from her
then what
we went to the parking lot
where you shot her
that 's right
you sure she ai n't somewhere with a half a million dollars i worked my ass off to earn
fuck you for asking me that
pull the car over
what 'd you shoot her with
it 's in there
you see max cherry in the dress department
we 're about to be handed half a million dollars -- man look at me when i 'm talking to you
and you do n't think nothing of him being there
do max cherry and jackie brown know each other
hell yes they know each other
he bonded her out of county
how am i supposed to know that
you know the motherfucker 's a bail bondsman do n't ya
you know every last one of them motherfuckers is crooked as hell
why should i think anything 's weird if i do n't know nothin' about them knowing each other
man i do n't want to hear your fuckin excuses
i ai n't givin you fuckin excuses i 'm givin you reasons
oh you gon na tell me the reason you lost all the goddam money i got in the world
let me tell you the reason motherfucker
the reason is your ass ai n't worth a shit no more
i 'm going out for a few hours
hold on a minute
where you going
i 'm going to del amo see a movie get something to eat
watcha gon na see
whatever looks best and starts the soonest
have fun
you 're right that was ordell
you have time you think you could find out for me where he 's staying
cops ca n't locate him huh
they do n't have your winning personality
sure thing
i do n't have to know what i 'm doing long as you know
i think i do
is that good enough
how can i help you
where would you like me to put my ash
that 's winston
he works here
he 's a big one
you two tight
yeah
it was our idea to take the picture was n't it
so you want a ten thousand dollar bond
what 've you got for collateral
gon na have to put up cash
you have it with you
it 's in my bag
you have cash
what do you need me for
c'mon you know how they do
black man comes in with ten thousand they wanna fuck with 'em
first off they gon na wanna know where i got it
second they gon na keep a big chunk of it -- start talkin that court cost shit
fuck that shit jack
i 'll go through you
cost you a thousand for the bond
i know that
what 's his full name
beaumont
that 's the only name i know
getting there
you go wait in the car
wait a minute
beaumont livingston
livingston huh
on his prior he served nine months and he 's working on four years probation
you do n't say
do you know what he 's on probation for
have n't a clue
possession of unregistered machine guns
will they consider this a violation of his probation
they do consider this a violation of his probation
your boy 's looking at ten years plus the concealed weapon
man he wo n't like that
beaumont do n't got a doin' time disposition
i need your name and address
ordell robbie
o r d e l l. r o b b- i e. 1436 florence boulevard
compton 90222
house or apartment
house
now i need you to count your money
across the street a great western
it goes in a trust account
you 'll need to fill out an application for appearance bond an indemnity agreement a contingent promissory note
that 's the one if beaumont skips and i go after him you pay the expenses
beaumont ai n't going nowhere
where do i sign
hey max
yes
i was wondering
what if before the court date gets here beaumont gets hit by a bus or something and dies
i get my money back do n't i
comfortable
the door was opened so i just came right in
i can see that
why
i got some more business for ya
oh yeah
what did he do
she is an airline stewardess
got caught coming back from mexico with some blow
they set her bond this afternoon at ten thousand
now what i was thinkin you could use the ten thousand you owe me from beaumont and move it over on to the stewardess
the bond for possession is only a thousand
they fuckin wit her
they callin it possession with intent
a black woman in her forties gets busted with less than two ounces on her they call that shit intent
same shit happened to a movie star
it 's possession
it still sounds high
she had i believe it was
fifty grand on her too
there was a cop at the hearing
young guy with l.a.p.d. wanted her bond set at twenty- five thousand saying there was a risk of flight
jackie being a stewardess and all
before we start talking about stewardess let 's get beaumont out of the way first
somebody already did
what
you did n't hear
hear what
somebody with a grudge blew beaumont 's brains out -- hey that rhymes -- blew beaumont 's brains out
did the police contact you
very first motherfuckin thing they did
they see i put up a big money bond on my boy they start thinking with that where there's smoke there 's fire logic
they roust my ass outta bed ten o'clock in the morning
fuckin scare my woman sherona half to death
she thought they were gon na take my ass away for sure
the stewardess
do you know her last name
brown jackie brown
what does she do for you
who says she does anything for me
she 's my friend
when my friends get into trouble i like to help 'em out
beaumont worked for you
that 's what the police thought
i told them i 'm unemployed how could i have anybody work for me
now i bail out jackie i 'm liable to have the police on me again huh
wanting to know was she doing things for me was she bringing me that money
was she
is this me and you like a lawyer- client relationship
the lawyer ca n't tell nothing he hears
you 're not my client until you get busted and i bond you out
if there 's no -- what do you call it -- confidentiality between us
why would i tell you anything
cause you want me to know what a slick guy you are
you got stewardesses bringing you fifty grand
why would a stewardess bring me fifty grand
you want me to speculate on what you do
i 'd say you 're in the drug business except the money 's moving in the wrong direction
whatever you 're into you seem to be getting away with it so more power to you
okay you want another bond and you want to move over the ten thousand you put down on beaumont to the stewardess
that means paperwork
i have to get a death certificate present it to the court fill out a receipt for return of bond collateral then type up another application
an indemnity agreement --
jackie ai n't got time for all that shit --
i 'm telling you what i have to do
what you have to do in case you forgot is come up with premium of a thousand bucks
i got it
i just do n't got it on me
well come back when you do and i 'll bond out the stewardess
man you know i 'm good for it
thousand bucks ai n't shit
if i do n't see it in front of me you 're right
it ai n't shit
man you need to look at this with a little compassion
jackie ai n't no criminal
she ai n't used to this kinda treatment
i mean gangsters do n't give a fuck -- but for the average citizen coupla nights in county fuck with your mind
ordell this is n't a bar an you do n't have a tab
just listen for a second
we got a forty year old gainfully employed black woman falsely accused --
falsely accused
she did n't come back from mexico with cocaine on her
falsely accused of intent
if she had that shit -- and mind you i said if -- it was just her shit to get high with
is white guilt supposed to make me forget i 'm running a business
where is it
is that what i think it is
the bond collateral on beaumont livingston you moved over to cover miss brown remember
she got off huh
they decided to no file
tell me where you are and i 'll bring you your money
you still there
looky here i know you helped her and i know you know what i want
jackie can tell me any story come in that pretty head of hers
long as at the end of that story she hands over my money
she do that we 're still friends
now she do n't wanna be my friend no more tell her to think about ol' louis
and if she tries to turn me in i 'll name her ass as my accessory
we 'll go upstate together
hand in handcuffed hand
now that shit 's a promise understand what i 'm sayin
you tell her that and i 'll call you back
what the fuck you doin' knockin on the door like the goddamn police
you lookin to get shot
i thought you might be asleep
you keep fuckin with me you 're gon na be asleep forever
i 'm alone
git your ass in here
that 's all
i have a bond receipt for you to sign
you know what the fuck i 'm talkin about
you talk to her
she wants to give you your money
if she did n't there 'd be cops batter- ramming the door right now
how 'd you find me
winston found you
how the fuck did he find me
that 's what winston does
he finds people who do n't want to be found
well bully for that nigga
you say she wants to give me the money huh
uh huh
well give it to me then
she wants to give it to you herself and collect her ten percent
she also wants to explain why she had to hold on to it
i 'd like to hear that too
turn around and put your hands on your head
jackie did n't trust melanie
she 'd already tried to get jackie to go in with her split the half million amongst themselves
what she did was take quite a risk to see you get your money
lift up your pant leg
you help her
all i did was walk out with it
and you did that to protect my interest
in a way yes
my ass be dumb but i 'm not a dumbass
go sit over there on the couch
this place stinks
you get used to it after a while
now tell me where my money 's at
my office
and where 's jackie
she 's been there since thursday night
she wanted to see me why was n't she home
she was afraid
that i got ta see
she still is
she does n't want to get shot before she can tell you what happened
have her bring the money here
it 's in the safe
she ca n't get at it
call her tell her the combination
i 'm telling you you got her spooked
she wo n't leave there till you have your money and you 're gone
you expect me to just walk in there
if she wanted to set you up you 'd be in custody right now
when you said you 'd name her as an accessory she believed you
that scares her more than anything
that 's why she 's givin up my money huh
not that bullshit about melanie
i did n't trust her ass neither but i knew how to handle her
she was my blonde headed little surfer gal
i fuckin told louis he could 've just given her a punch in the mouth he did n't need to shoot her
she 's at your office
uh huh
by herself
that big mandingo nigga winston ai n't there is he
she 's all alone
i call your office she better answer the phone
she will
it 's the next street
i know where it is
turn left
i know where to turn
who is it
it 's beaumont
we 're back
ola
hey hey hey
i think somebody 's got some new clothes
we been shoppin
ca n't have my boy running around lookin like a bum on the street
ha ha ha
i 'm serious you smoke too much of that shit
that shit robs you of your ambition
not if your ambition is to get high and watch tv
hello
hey jackie
no jackie i did n't get your message
i was gon na tell you
hope you do n't mind keeping him company
no problem
try not to rip his clothes off 'em they 're new
cherry bail bonds
let me speak to max cherry
he ai n't here right now
he leave town
he 's around
give me his home number
i 'll give you his beeper
dream on
no
oh god
go on jake
she reads 'em like a book
no thanks
it 's fun
hiya jake
that was some dance
della
you want to see me
well here i am
i see
what do you want
just to see you
that 's all
well how do i look
like della
dr. singer
it 's been a long time
hello sam
are you all right
i 'm okay
do you want some help
i can call upstairs
no do n't
but thanks
by who
why
paul did n't have an enemy in the world
how do you know
hey you 're talkin about paul
who 'd want to hurt him
something weird is going on here
what is it about us
even in nam it was always weird
are we all crazy or something
yeah ever since that
grass never did that to me
you know i 've been to three shrinks and a hypnotist
nothing penetrates that night
nothing
too late
i 've tried
i think you 're right jake
i 'm game
me too
you know you got a strange line here
it 's short huh
short
it 's ended
oh terrific
it 's not funny
according to this
you 're already dead
just my luck
what did he talk about when you guys went out
did he say anything
he was upset
he thought people were following him
hello
frank
it 's jake
jacob singer
listen i just got a strange call from geary
he said the guys backed down
what 's he talking about
that 's right
we did
what does that mean frank
i do n't get it
why
it 's hard to explain
well try huh
i do n't know if i can
it 's just that war is war
things happen
things happen
what the fuck are you talking about
they did something to us frank
we have to expose this
there 's nothing to expose
jesus christ
who 's been talking to you
what 's going on
how can you just turn away
what about the others
they 're not interested jake
shit
you know it 's not half the case if i go it alone
we 're all suffering the same symptoms frank
the army is to blame
they 've done something to us
how can you not want to know
maybe it 's not the army jake
what do you mean
maybe there 's a larger truth
what are you talking about
maybe the demons are real
goddamn it
what kind of bullshit is that
listen jake
i got ta go
what the hell
what kind of mumbo jumbo
i 'm hanging up
hey wait
do n't bother to call again okay
daddy what was that noise
gabe
what are you doing
there was a bang
it was the window
it 's cold
tell your mother
mom it 's
wait
daddy
now what
do n't go
do n't go
i 'm not going anywhere
i 'm right here gabe
come on go back to sleep
you can still get a couple of hours
i 'm sorry mr. singer but do you have any idea how many people come to me with the injustices of the world
it 'd break your heart
this is n't injustice mr. geary
the army did something to us and we 've got to find out what
the army
the army
what is it with you guys
we 're not talking about a trip to the library here
this is the united states government for god 's sake
this is red tape coming out of your ass
you know what i mean
exactly
and we need someone to cut through it
we hear you 're the man
oh yeah
what am i perry mason here
doctor
ph.d.
ah
i thought you were a mailman
i am
then why are n't you teaching
why are n't you in a university
i 'm too messed up to teach
ah
well then they 're going to have to pay for that are n't they
you mind
i 'm eating huh
something 's going on here
you 're not telling me something
what the hell 's gotten into you
i 'll tell you what 's gotten into me
i do n't know you from adam right
you come to my office with this bizarro story and demand i look into it
okay
i said i 'd check it out and i did
now i do n't know what kind of fool you take me for but you have used and abused me and i do n't like it
used you
i talked to the army 's bureau of records
you 've never even been to viet nam
what the hell is that supposed to mean
it means that you and your buddies are whacko that you were discharged on psychological grounds after some war games in thailand
war games
thailand
that 's not true
how can you believe that
ca n't you see what they 're doing
it 's all a lie
we were in da nang for god 's sake
you 've got to believe me
i do n't have to do any such thing
i 'm eating my lunch okay
bullshit
someone 's covering somethin'
that was no accident
why do you say that
cars do n't explode that way
any simpleton knows that
but the paper
that was set
i 'm tellin you
what 'd he say that for
what made him say that
strange huh
strange
what else did he say jake
what do you mean demons
he told me he was going to hell
he was scared
he saw these creatures coming out of the woodwork
they were tryin to get him he said
how long had that been going on
a couple of weeks i think
he say what they looked like
no
not really
excuse me a minute
i 'll be right back
you think they 're connected
i think something 's fucking connect- ed
i mean a car tried to run me over the other day
doug too right
we 've got six guys here going fucking crazy
it 's not worth goin' over again and again
whatever happened happened
it 's over
... i 've seen them too
shit
come on professor
the army 's not gon na give you any answers
you 'll be buttin your head against a stone wall
maybe that 's the only way to get through
besides six heads'll be better than one
not my head buddy
not me
i 'm gettin a headache just listenin to you
we should get ourselves a lawyer
i say you should get a shrink
come on jake
that did n't hurt
how do you know
i know you
how come you 're so tense today
what can i tell you
i saw sarah the other day
her knee acting up
a bit
what did she have to say
turn on your right side
how about the other right
i do n't understand you philosphers
you 've got the whole world figured out but you ca n't remember the difference between right and left
i was absent the day they taught that in school
what did she say
who
sarah
not much
she 's like you that way
two clams
no wonder your marriage did n't last
put your hand under your head
take a breath and then let it out
ah good
now turn to your left
she talk about the boys
she says she ca n't get them new coats because you have n't sent the alimony for three months
she told you that
did she tell you about the 2,000 i 'm still paying for the orthodontist
i 'll bet she did n't mention that
she said you were a son of a bitch and she regrets the day she set eyes on you
i thought you said she did n't say much
she did n't
that 's about all she said
put your hand up
good
i think she still loves you
take a breath and let it out
loves me
she has n't said a kind word about me in years
right
she does n't stop talking about you
you 're always on her mind
that 's love jake
she hates me louis
you should go back to her
what
she threw me out remember
she wanted some professor to carry her far away from brooklyn
only we did n't make it
she ca n't forgive me that she still lives in the same house she grew up in
her problem is that you spent eight years getting a phd and then went to work for the post office
what can i tell you louis
after nam i did n't want to think anymore
i decided my brain was too small an organ to comprehend this chaos
if it was any other brain but yours i might agree
relax this is going to be strong
i ca n't relax
wiggle your toes
god almighty
what did you do to me
i had to get in there
a deep adjustment
rest a moment and let it set a bit
i had this weird flash just then
what
i do n't know
i 've been having them recently
you know you look like an angel louis an overgrown cherub
anyone ever tell you that
yeah
you
every time i see you
no more errol flynn okay
your back wo n't take it
you tell your girl friend to calm down if she knows what 's good for you
louis you 're a life saver
i know
half an hour from now and you 'll be walking out of here all by yourself
mark my words
well you 've done it to yourself this time have n't you
am i dead louis
am i dead
from a slipped disc
that 'd be a first
i was in hell
i 've been there
it 's horrible
i do n't want to die louis
well i 'll see what i can do about it
i 've seen it
it 's all pain
you ever read meister eckart
how did you ever get your doctorate without reading eckart
good
okay let 's turn over gently
right side
perfect
we got it
okay
let 's just give it a little try
see if you can stand
what
by myself
you can do it
come on
easy
just give it a try
what are you doing
there 's something i 've got ta take care of louis
what are you talking about
you can barely stand
i 'm walking are n't i
jake you need to rest
not tonight louis
no more rest
i 've got a problem prof
more augus- tine than kierkegaard if you know what i mean
i need to know about
demons
demons jacob
why demons
are you writing
no
i see them
see them
what do you mean
physically
yes
i know very little about demons ja- cob fleshy ones anyway
i know them as literary figures biblical ones
dante milton
but jacob this is the 20th century
we do n't see demons now
i see them prof
everywhere
they 're invading my life
christ i know how it sounds
have you considered a doctor
a psy- chiatrist
yes
i do n't want them
i 'm not looking for analysis or drugs
it 's too easy to dismiss as some kind of psychosis
it 's more than that
i can feel it
i need you prof
you 're the only one i can talk to
i do n't know what to say
i need your insight your intuition
demons
i do n't know what to tell you
it sounds like a spiritual mat- ter to me
the problem jacob is that you have no context for it
you 're a renegade existentialist suf- fering demons a hundred years after freud
how the hell am i supposed to make it fit
i 'm afraid prof
nothing makes sense
please help me
jacob i do n't believe in demons not in the empirical sense
i do n't be- lieve in devils fighting for our souls
i do n't believe in enternal damnation
i do n't believe in other- worldly creatures tormenting us
we do n't need them
we do a good enough job on ourselves
but i see them
look
i do n't pretend to know what 's going on inside your head
for all i know it 's pathological and they should be pumping valium into your veins by the quart
but if you 're not willing to accept the help of sci- ence and believe me i admire you for that then you 'll have to do bat- tle on your own
what can i say
it 's a lonely pilgrimage through our times even for the strongest souls
but to be pursued by
demons no less
there are no guides jacob
you wanna know what i 'd do if i sud- denly started seeing demons
i 'd hail the first taxi that came along shoot over to bellvue and beg them for shock treatment
i 'm no saint
hell you think i am
i'venever understood you you know that
you were by far the best pupil i 've ever had bar none
intellectu- ally you were the most original the most imaginative
who knows maybe you 've been elected to see demons
maybe you 're in touch with
some- thing
nothing would surprise me about you jacob
nothing
i 'd like to speak to dr. carlson please
carlson
is he new here
new
he 's been here for years
not according to my charts
do you have an appointment
look i need to see him
i know where his room is
just give me a pass
i wo n't be long
ten minutes
our doctors are seen by appointment only
damn it
i was in the veteran 's out- patient program
he knows me
what 's your name
jacob singer
i 'm sorry but there 's no record of a jacob singer in our files
whataya mean no record
you want me to spell it out
there 's nothing here
that 's ridiculous
i 've been coming here for years
listen to me
i 'm going out of my fucking mind here
i need to see him
if this is an emergency we have a staff of psychiatric social workers
there 's about an hour 's wait
i 'll be glad to take your name
why do n't you just fill out this form
goddamn it
i do n't want a social worker
carlson knows me
what was that
it 's freezing
i 'm not cold
of course not
you have all the blankets
it must be ten degrees in here
i 'm telling you sarah if you want to sleep with fresh air you sleep on the fire escape
from now on that window is closed
it 's not healthy with it closed
this is healthy
i 'll probably die of pneumonia tomorrow and this is healthy
jacob what can i do
save me
my back
i ca n't move
i need my chiropractor
your back
did you fall
they stole it
who did
i do n't know
santa claus
i had my son 's picture in it
gabe 's picture
it 's the only one i had
we better get an orthopedic man in here
is dr. davis on call
i 'm going to have to move you a bit just to check for injuries
this may hurt a little
no
do n't move me
i do n't have to ask if you can feel that
goddamn it
i want louis
jake is that you
what the hell did you do move all the furniture
why did n't you turn on the light
i did n't want to wake you
gee thanks a lot
where is the lamp
where are you
if i knew i would n't have to ask
what did you do
i was happy the way it was
i moved the couch
that 's all
where to
that help
thanks
what do you think
what do you mean
the room
oh god jezzie ask me tomorrow
it is tomorrow
four a.m. how come you 're so late
roberts did n't show up
what could i say
besides it 's double time
what happened to you
do n't ask
look at these will ya
i do n't believe it
jesus these are fantastic
look here 's my dad
and here 's my brother when we were down in florida
lemme see
here
look
this is me and sarah when i was still at city college
that 's sarah
i can see what you mean
what
why you left
what do you mean you can see
look at her face
a real bitch
she looked good then
not to me
well you did n't marry her
is that the one who died
gabe
wait
do n't
i do n't like things that make you cry
i just want to look
ready
just gettin rid of the garbage
jake
how 's it going
i 'm going home
what 's wrong
i do n't know
one of these days i 'm gon na see louis
my back 's killing me
now
what about the boss
he 's not gon na like it
well i 'll miss riding home with you
i was looking forward to it
i 'll be glad to avoid the crush
i enjoy crushing into you
maybe it 's all the pressure jake
the money
things like that
or your wife
why do you bring her up
'cause she 's always on your mind
when was the last time i said a word
it has nothin' to do with talkin
ca n't you stop it
if i could stop it i 'd stop it
what 's it say
a hundred and two
i do n't believe this
i 'm calling the doctor
what does it say
it 's gone to the top
how high is that
the numbers stop at 107
what the hell are you doin'
get your clothes off
what are you talking about
i 'm freezing
get your clothes off
what 'd the doctor say
that you 'd die on the way to the hospital
now get into that tub
he 's coming right over
coming here
goddamn it
get in here
i ca n't stand around waiting
you 're out of your mind
i 'm not getting in there
i 'd rather die
that 's your decision
look at me
i 'm ice cold
you 're red hot damn it
get in there
i 've got to get more ice
i ca n't do it
what kind of man are you
jake
you 're gon na be all right jake
you 're gon na be fine
am i home
you 're here
home
the doctor said you 're lucky your brains did n't boil
what a night jake
it was crazy
you kept sayin sarah close the window over and over
and talkin to your kids
even the dead one
weird
you know you melted 200 pounds of ice in 8 hours
amazing huh
are we in brooklyn
you 're right here jake
you just rest
the doctor said you had a virus
that 's what they say when they do n't know what it is
you ca n't do anything for a week
he says you got ta recuperate
now you just lie here
mrs. sandelman made you some chicken soup
it 'll warm you up
you know you really ought to get out today
you ca n't just sit around like this all the time
it 's not healthy
it 's not good for your mind
go take a walk or somethin'
go to a movie
christ who 's gon na know
you think i care
i do n't give a shit
go
enjoy yourself
one of us should be having a good time
hello
anybody home
anybody in there
what
look i 'm horny
keep it in mind
love me a little
you are the most unbelievable woman i have ever met
one second you 're a screaming banshee and the next you 're florence nightingale
who are you
that 's what i want to know
will the real jezzie pipkin please stand up
so tell me
am i still an angel
with wings
you transport me you know that
you carry me away
we 're all angels you know
and devils
it 's just what you choose to see
i love you jez
i know
underneath all the bullshit just love
remember that
you know what
i feel
exorcised
like the demons are gone
how come
the army
in a way
at least now i have some idea of what was happening
if we can only get them to admit
to explain what they did
i do n't know
maybe it 'd clear things up in my head
i 'll tell you something jez honestly
i thought they were real
i put a frozen dinner in the oven a manhandler
it 'll be ready at a quarter of
i threw a little salad together
it 's in the fridge
i also bought some apple juice red cheek
do n't drink it all
oh and jake your lawyer called
he did
when
while you were in the shower
why did n't you call me
he did n't give me a chance
look honey do n't get upset but he 's not taking your case
what
what do you mean
he said you did n't have one
what 's he talking about
i do n't know
that 's all he said
he was n't very friendly
oh yeah
he said your buddies backed down
they chickened out he said
i do n't believe this
baby i 'm sorry
i feel terrible
i 'd stay and talk but i 'm so late
look do n't be upset
we 'll talk when i get home
see you around midnight
bye
and do n't brood
watch t.v. or something
it 's just me
jezzie
who else were you expecting
let go
where were you jake
where 've you been
why have n't you called
stay away from me jez
i want to know
you tell me
you wanna know
turn on the t.v. watch the fucking news
why are you doing this to me
you ca n't just go away like that
i can do anything i want
what are you doing here
are you all right
how do you expect to pay for this
everyone 's looking for you jake
i dodged people all over the place reporters police
i do n't know what you 're gon na do
i 'm gon na make love to you
that 's what i 'm gon na do
are you out of your mind
yep
finally
i love you jez
god i ca n't keep up with all your changes
me neither
what 's gotten into you
it 's amazing you know that a drug could change things like that destroy a life and then give it back
it 's hard to believe that the world could be so hellish on day and like heaven the next
i tell you it was so wonderful
i felt like a little boy
i saw paradise jezzie
it 's so hard to believe
this is one of my dreams jake
ever since i was a little girl
i never thought it would happen
stick with me kid
i want to go with you jake
wherever you go
it 's not practical jez
it 'll be hard enough alone
i can waitress
i 'm good
no
things are too hot
later
i 'll send for you
bullshit
i promise
please
no
i 'm a marked man jez
i 'm the only one left
i do n't want to expose you to that
it 's not right for you or me
be reasonable
reasonable
reasonable
jake
you 're gettin me angry
i love you when you 're angry
oh yeah
try leavin without me
what 're you
where 's sarah
where are the boys
sit down jake
where are they
sit down
no
what 's going on
where 's my family
it 's over jake
it 's all over
where have they gone
wake up
stop playing with yourself
it 's finished
what 's going on
your capacity for self delusion is remarkable dr. singer
what 's wrong jake
forget to take your antidote
who are you
what are you doing to me
you have quite a mind jake
i loved your friends
that chemist the ladder
what an imagination you have
who are you
how many times have you asked me that
how many times
tell me damn you
you know who i am
why wo n't you answer me
cause you know goddamn well who i am
i do n't know you
you 've lived with me for two years
that does n't mean shit
where do you come from huh
and i do n't mean indiana
what do you want me to say
my mother 's tummy
you know goddamn well what i mean
you 're out of your fucking mind
i 'm not gon na stand around here gettin interrogated by you
well leave then
go to hell
you son of a bitch
who do you think you are
i do n't deserve this
who takes care of you day and night
who cleans the floor and washes your goddamn underwear
well i 've had it
you flip out on your own you ungrateful bastard
i 'm done holding your hand
i do n't want anything to do with you you hear
nothing
what 'd you do that for
it 's an in- teresting story
all these people are still disappearing
right off the street
hey what 's wrong
are you all right
i 'm okay
i just do n't want to lis- ten
you look upset
i 'm not upset
jake what is it
i 'm tired
you look terrible
what happened
jake
is it the antidote
goddamn it
why do you say that
look at yourself
you look like you 've seen a ghost
shit
ca n't i just have a bad day
you can have anything you want
then do n't bug me
i 'm not bugging you
come and lie down
i 'll give you a massage
where 'd you go today
mid town mostly
oh yeah
what was happenin there
i picked up my ticket
i 'm leaving in the morning jez
oh
where you going
west
where 's west
new jersey
do n't be funny
i always liked the west west of il- linois anyway
but you got ta give me time to pack
stop it jez
do n't do that
do what
i have n't done a thing
do n't play games with me
there 's nothing more to say
where 's sarah
where are the boys
sit down jake
where are they
sit down
no
what 's going on
where 's my family
it 's over jake
it 's all over
where have they gone
wake up
stop playing with yourself
it 's finished
this is n't happening
your capacity for self delusion is remarkable dr. singer
oh god
what 's wrong jake
forget to take your antidote
goddamn you
i loved your chemist jake
the height of fantasy
and your vision of paradise
a most romantic creation
you 're quite a dreamer jake
only it 's time to wake up
who are you
how many times have you asked me that
how many times
tell me damn you
you know who i am
surprised huh
i told you you 'd know me
i 've been tracking you for a long time
i just wish i 'd spoken to you before tonight
i do n't get it
who are you
why have you been following me
observation mainly
clinical study
you were one of the survivors
so first i 'm arrested right
best lsd i ever made right down the drain
i figure this is it twenty years in the joint if i 'm lucky
that was 68
long time ago
next thing i know i 'm on rikers island
ever been there
suddenly they take me from my cell to the visitors room with those bank teller windows you know
four army colonels medals up their asses are standing on the other side
they tell me if i 'll come to vietnam for two years no action mind you just work in a lab they 'll drop all the charges and wipe the record clean
well i 'd only been in jail for thirteen hours and i already knew that nam could n't be any worse
shows how much you knew
no shit
they had me by the balls
next thing i know i 'm in saigon
in a secret lab synthesizing mind- altering drugs
not the street stuff mind you
they had us isolating special properties
the dark side you know
they wanted a drug that increased aggressive tendencies
yeah sure
we were losing the war
right
they were worried
they figured you guys were too soft
they wanted something to stir you up tap into your anger you know
and we did it
the most powerful thing i ever saw
even a bad trip and i had my share never compared to the fury of the ladder
the ladder
that 's what they called it
a fast trip right down the ladder
right to the primal fear the base anger
i 'm tellin you it was powerful stuff
but i do n't need to tell you
you know
i always suspected the effects might come back
that 's why i had to follow you
i had a hell of a time getting hold of your records
if you knew why did n't you say anything
the truth can kill my friend
five hundred men died out there
this is n't a story they 'd ever want out
when paul 's car blew up i realized the scope of the thing
i knew they meant business
so why tell me now
because i can get rid of the demons
i can block the ladder
i have an antidote
we can kill them off chemically speaking
they 'll all disappear
it 's chemistry my friend
i know
i created it
come with me
i can help
you come here often
sometimes
when it 's convenient
how do i know this is n't just some kind of you know seduction or something
hey i 'm not the problem
you 've got bigger problems than me
i came up with the formula back in nam but i never got a chance to use it
never
i 'd hoped i 'd never have to
just open your mouth and stick out your tongue
what is it
do n't worry
take it
it 'll free your head
come on
i do n't know
yea though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death i shall fear no evil but no one ever said i would n't be shittin in my pants every step of the way huh
stick out your tongue
that'a boy
now why do n't you just lie down and relax
one drop
it 's strong stuff
i think i 'm falling asleep
pleasant dreams
i ca n't move
just relax
what 's happening
help me
and no more demons
i told you they 'd be gone
i do n't believe this
it 's a miracle michael
a miracle
better living through chemistry that 's my motto
it was paradise michael
you showed it to me
you were there
well that 's good to know
mike it was real
it was glorious
glorious
i 'm not surprised
i fed you enough of that stuff to send a horse to heaven
i 'm just glad you came back
i would have stayed there if i could
i 'm sure
you 've got nothing but troubles waitin for you here
here
i 've got every credit card ever printed
take this
stay here till you can arrange to get away
it 's on me
no
i could n't
what
you want the plaza
do n't be foolish
here
take this too
this is my place on prince street
it 's got my phone everything
call if you need me
but you wo n't
everything 's gon na work out
you just get outta town as fast as you can
the new york police can be effective when they want to be
i do n't know what to say
save the words
just send back my credit card
where 's wong
that 's what i 'd like to know
if you see him on the street somewhere tell him he 's fired
how was palm springs
hot
where do i sign
you got a nice tan though
tan
what tan
it faded on the airplane
i 'd try to get my money back but who do you ask
two hundred dollars a night for what
no
i 'll take the other one
right
well it 's good to have you back
see you tomorrow probably
if you 're lucky
he 's burning up
total delirium
that 's some gash
his guts keep spilling out
push 'em back
help me
throw that torch away young man
give yourself up
you 're under arrest
for what
for seeking the truth
please come quietly
you come near me and i 'll blow us all up
we 're not going to hurt you
clear the area
this is an order
what is wrong with you
dream on
what
he 's burning up
total delirium
he 'll never make it
that 's some gash
his guts keep spilling out
push 'em back
help me
this is not a dream
this is my life
of course it is
what else could it be
hello
jacob singer
speaking
paul gruneger
paul gruneger
well i 'll be goddamned
paul
you son of a bitch how the hell are you
i have n't seen you in what five six years
a long time
jesus christ
how 've you been
what 's happening in your life
nothin' much
me neither
nothing too exciting
so tell me to what do i owe the honor
i need to see you jake
shit paul
i 'd love to see you
but i 'm kind of laid up here
i 've been sick
i need to see you
jesus man you look terrific
you must have put on twenty pounds
i work in a bakery
you 're lucky
how many vets you know are even employed
count 'em on one hand
it 's almost like a conspiracy huh
no joke
fuckin army
that goddamn war
i 'm still fightin it
it 's not worth it
you 'll never win
you tellin me
how many times can you die huh
still married jake
nope
you and everybody else
god i hate this area
makes me nervous
why the hell we drivin here
i just need to talk
you ca n't talk in brownsville
i 'm not sure where i can talk anymore
what 's wrong
let 's get a couple drinks okay
hey take a look behind us
do you think that car is followin us
that black car
pull the mirror down on the sun visor
just watch 'em
what 's goin' on paul
i do n't know
you in trouble
yeah
that 's as straight as i can put it
and do n't tell me that i 'm crazy 'cause i know i 'm not
i 'm goin' to hell
they 're comin after me
who is
they 've been followin me
they 're comin outta the walls
i do n't trust anyone
i 'm not even sure i trust you
but i got ta talk to someone
i 'm gon na fly outta my fuckin mind
sorry
sometimes i think i 'm just gon na jump outta my skin
they 're just drivin me wild
who paul
what exactly
i do n't know who they are or what they are
but they 're gon na get me and i 'm scared jake
i 'm so scared i ca n't do anything
i ca n't go to my sisters
i ca n't even go home
why not
they 're waitin for me that 's why
it 's okay paul
it 's okay
i do n't know what to do
do n't do anything
paul i know what you 're talking about
what do you mean
i 've seen them too
the demons
you 've seen them
everywhere like a plague
god almighty
i thought i was the only one
me too
i had no idea
it 's like i was coming apart at the seams
oh god
i know
i know
what is it paul
what 's happening to me
they keep telling me i 'm already dead that they 're gon na tear me apart piece by piece and throw me into the fire
i carry these everywhere but they do n't help
nothing helps
everyone thinks i 'm crazy
my mother filed a report with the army
the army
she said i have n't been the same since then
since that night
there 's still this big hole in my brain
it 's so dark in there jake
and these creatures
it 's like they 're crawling out of my brain
what happened that night
why wo n't they tell us
i do n't know
i do n't know
they 're monsters jake
we 're both seein 'em
there 's got ta be a connection
something
i 'm so sorry
obviously you have n't
dr. carlson died
died
a car accident
jesus jesus
when
last month before thanksgiving
how did it happen
no one knows
they say it blew up
blew up
what do you mean it blew up
do you want me to get someone
no
no
it 's okay
i 'm okay
i have some ice from the machine
bring it in
is he all right
he does n't like it
i do n't blame him
what should i do with the ice
pour it in
on top of him
he 's melting it as fast as we dump it in
okay
my husband 's got two more bags
he 's coming
they 're heavy
watch it punk i 'm armed
punk
that 's nine to four geek boy
you got lucky
you got lucky
i could have waited until he ate your head
speaking of which duck
that sucks
why wo n't he go down
pause play
he 's not part of the program
hey cool
they brought ancient hockey guy back to life
asshole that does not count as a kill
yes it does
oh come on
duck fuckers
he 's either unconcious or playing dead whichever he ai n't really dead
okay you know that 's it for me
i 'm outta here
forget the bridge the shuttle 's waiting
what do you mean not enough time
just make a break for the door
he 'll get some of us but that 's the breaks
we 're not leaving crutch
we do n't have time to argue
goodbye old friend
okay he was a great guy now let 's move out
could you show a little compassion
it 's locked
then break it
if you do n't pull it the ship 's going to depressurize
what are you doing
if the ship goes so does jaso
rizzo pull the fucking lever
no
what 's that
that 's the sound of deep space attacking the integrity of the ship
when the left hull goes so will the right
what if we blow the walkways first
leave jason over here to go up with the ship
his mother
what
i do n't know
nothing
minimal
we made it
the ship 's depressurizing the engines overheating
when it reaches the core we 're done
done
hurry up guys
we 've got the rescue ship on radar
delongpre
out of time
remember stay calm use your thrusters
we 'll be fine
why would n't we be
i mean look around
so far so good
damnit to hell you left me back there to die
sergeant
we thought you were
yeah yeah
well what have you got to say for yourself
bomb
explosive
we 're blowing the walkway
blowing the walkway
you come up with that yourself
rizzo did
uh oh
what
kkinsa
open the doors
okay that hurt
thorgan pull us in
where have you been
he
he
where the hell were you
he came for me i had to run
creepy
cool
nice touch
and you said high school was boring
you see that
briggs geko movement beyond the boxed fuselage
better let me
where 'd you get the gun
we 're not supposed to do that
what are you gon na do tell me
i 'll need system four converters
they 're back here
hey
i 'm not ready
then you better hurry
i 'll blow alley one delongpre you and rizzo take there
janessa you ready two and we 'll meet up there
thorgan quit screwing around and come on
i 'm coming i 'm coming
kay em
what are you doing back
as long as they 're connected we can blow them all simultaneously from a safe distance
two more charges to go
done
let 's move out
goodbye my love
thorgan suit up
this is gon na work
if he sticks to the program
will he
stick to the program
how many
bring 'em all
let 's move
i think i speak on behalf of the group when i say this is bad news
thorgan
you coming
where is
you tell me
she 's only set one charge
and it 's not finished
i 'd say we have about ten minutes tops
then stop talking and work faster
then what do we do
i do n't know
hurry
faster
do n't we have another gun
it bought us some time
and now we 're all out of it
earth ii
suit up
my god
this is way over your head pal
we need to call some experts and
i am an expert
you 're a teacher
brodski i 'll talk slow so you can understand me
she 's thawing
if we do n't get her to the lab she 'll die and that will be on your bald fucking head
what if they 're carrying
did you even check
how do you know that piece of cursed rock down there does n't carry something metal tits ca n't detect
well when we rejuvenate this one you can ask her
damnit yllo
i do n't like it
i do n't give a shit
this one 's prime for decryonization
we 're brining her back
i still think we should send for a team of real scientists
i am a scientist you asshole
this could be the most important discovery in 400 years
do you have any idea what a find like this could mean
right now i care only for the safety of this crew
you do n't know anything about these two
jesus what the hell is that
that 's exactly what we need to find out
check your orders sergeant
i out rank you where discovery is concerned
now step aside
i have a medical emergency to deal with
what the hell are you doing
my job
fine just stay out of my way
hit it
wait a minute
i need
give it a rest yllo
she needs some time
yllo what 's your head count
looks like we 're missing two
stone and kkinsa
all i 'm saying is dock with space lab couple of hours no more
let them take a look at our friends
not a chance
just do n't go in there half cocked
you guys have a tendency to blow shit up and ask questions later
you got that right
got it
let 's move out girls
yllo go to lab two and cover out backs
at least try to get him alive
will ya brodski
sergeant
what
i 'm with you kid
where is he
lab two relax
what 's the matter
he 's dead
no you 're dead
you 're all dead
he 's dead
they 're both dead
you do n't understand what is on this ship
this is a being that kills
that 's what he does
that 's all he does
and he is very good at it
kicker sven
get into the grid and tell me what the hell is going on
i doubt that
i think we can handle whatever your ancient hockey player can throw at us
look
just get everyone together get off the ship
and then blow it to kingdom fucking come
that 's the only way you 're going to live
i need to know what you know about this guy
do n't go out there
you ca n't win
we need to get off this ship
that 's all there is to it
not an option
i 'm going to hunt this son of a bitch down
we need weapons
weapons
all this technology and what good has it done
jesus god
oh man what the hell happened
report to weapons
we 're going on a hunt
roger that
time to kick some ass
jesus sarge what is this thing
teach
where the hell are you
where 's our visuals
where is everybody
what happened
damnit
you scared the hell out of me
give me a break
what happened
jason
he 's what happened
then grendel hit space lab
space lab
wait'll i get my hands on yllo
yllo 's dead
we
we thought you were too
takes more than a steelbalde to take this old dog down
pull me in
i 'm pulling damnit
where are you going
we have to get off this ship
you just need to relax
rizzo ti 's the future
we have soldiers on board e x grunts the baddest of the bad
and their weapons
i 'm sure are slightly more advanced than what you 're used to
i hope so
outta here
is n't there an escape pod on this ship
something
rizzo he 's out there
yeah and he 'll be here soon enough
last chance
well i 'm not hanging out here with ms. showtunes
guys
the shuttle
kkinsa crutch is hurt
we need access to the shuttle 's med kit or he 'll die
med kit
i guessed
we 're screwed
400 years in the future and these pea shooters are the best you can do
what if you miss
what if we do n't
rizzo
it 's better this way
if we were rescued jason would just get off the ship
you want him on your precious earth ii
hey
that 's a good fantasy though
kinky but good
hey
what 's this
it 's the engine reactors audiometers it 's the stuff that makes the ship go zoom
that 's why i 'm here
so you thought you 'd be cool
go against your father 's wishes
yeah that 's grown up
my father 's company imports and exports
archaeology is part of the business
we happen to get along just fine smartass
look why do n't you bust somebody else 's balls for a change
i thought you meant
you thought i meant
too tough to apologize huh
you must have been a very lonely girl
i could n't save them
well we 'd be dead without you
you know that do n't you
see
we 're not so bad
not so bad
you know this future shit sucks
i 'll fucking do it
you
wait around on your asses all day
i 'll need a distraction
got it
you ever space walked
oh sure all the time
his mother was killed before his eyes
that 's what drove him insane
it 'll work
that sounds like rizzo having faith in some of that future shit
eat me
you wanna release your air tanks
okay good tip
you 'll be fine
rizzo you okay
no i 'm not okay
i do n't know what the hell i 'm doing
you 're doing fine
i wo n't let anything happen to you remember
rizzo did they have chinese food in your time
i think i had some when i was eight
did you like it
i think so why
you okay
oh great
yeah having a great time and you
no thank you you crazy old woman
old woman
well i mean technically you are old enough to be my great great great
i get it
now what
we wait
i need about fifteen
call me if there are any changes
if she farts i want a full report
it 's time
what about the others
should n't we wait
i 've waited long enough
kay
you know what to do
spunky
she broke my fucking nose
well
she needs a little time
more time
shit she 's had 400 years
that 's really funny
i 'd want her statements before we reach porch
jesus women
yeah like you 'd be a rock after everything she went through
god damnit
will you stop doing that
oh i like her a lot
shut up
she just wants this thing dead
no shit
i got no problem with that
yuck
we 're screwed
go go go go go
he 's right behind us
i feel better
now how do you fire this damn thing
just go
i 've a feeling he 's right behind us
it 's on the table where i left it
what the hell are you doing
hurry up
i 'm on my way
kaboom
again
jesus
okay
just come on i 've got an idea
i 'll help you in
kay em you 've saved our lives you know that do n't you
oh shit
he 's going to see us
well do something
i
i do n't know what i did
you lost the charge
he was chasing me
they 're not gon na make it
close the door before he gets us all
they 'll make it
close the fucking door
no
and what 's with the headgear
the mask is an artifact from a sport outlawed in twenty twelve
now that 's just gross
go go go
now this is getting exciting
remember to roll his balls around a bit
you must shut down the engines
then do it
the rescue ship can find us here right
i knew you were a little sick but geez
i get no kick from champaign mere alcohol does n't faze me at all but i get a kick out of you
i 'm missing two
shit
temp 's dropping
we should have left this rock an hour ago
fat lou we 're changing courses for the solaras space lab
i 'll need the sergeant 's okay on that
we 've got a situation here
just do as you 're told
alright relax
20 minutes
soon as we 've passed tara 's rings we 'll make the course correction
thank you
this is what it means right here
small brains make your balls itch
i 'm gon na spew
that ought'a help the situation
you think it killed
yeah i guess not
let 's just get out of here
hurry
she 's lost it
so what else is new
you read a lot of science fiction did n't you
a little late to be thinking about escape is n't it
yeah great idea
and i 'll keep the big guy distracted with a blow job
would you
you 're so bossy
you 're leaving me here alone
look ice chip why do n't you just chill out and let us handle this
try to calm down
just think you 're going to be famous
what are you doing
jesus
ca n't you knock
diminish power to shutttle beowulf
what do we do
crutch
i 'll tell you where he is
he 's walking around this ship killing anything that moves
maybe she tripped
boeman do n't
you know i 'm right
are you crazy
pull the lever
no
teleportation
some way to beam us the hell out of dodge
any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental
i 'm just saying
come on
you got all these gadgets and shit
why ca n't we get inside the right hull seal up the doors and blow the walkways
i do n't know
sorry
sergeant we could use a big bomb
no
that 's the sound of the men working on the chain gang
are there any other shuttles
sumbitch wo n't be giving us anymore trouble
you killed him
blew half his skull away one leg one arm and left his entrails stretched across the lab
and look at me
i 'm covered in his filthy blood
the air 's laced with type two ozone it reads as a solid
somebody wanted the place to stay hidden
in twenty eighty two many of the survivors moved their facilities underground to escape
the cryo unit leaked
the computers sealed the room
no airborne viruses no hazardous materials
i 've shut down the until
alright stand back
hold your breath
initial cryo gasses will render you unconcious
i did n't say i was good at it
oh shit
there he is
i 'll never experience my fantasy of three sex droids two humans and a knofflapod
damn
am i in there
sory
it 's just you and me then
come here might as well fix that arm
almost done
ow
oh hush
i disengaged your pain programming
sometimes i just wish i had a kitten
kay em you okay
do n't worry about me
i live for this shit
you did good kay em
i 'm proud of you
a real mamma 's boy that one
dissed his mamma and he nearly threw a tantrum
little good it did him
kay em we made it
oh goody
i 'm so pleased
i 'd clap if i could
kay em you okay
i am now
i missed you thorgan
i missed you too
i love you
yo teach what the fuck
we 're missing two of the kids
get your ass back to the shuttle
i 'll check it out
fat lou bring the ship to the following coordinates
call grendel have them power up the labs we 're bringing in the find of the century
now wait a minute
i do n't think you should open that door
this is a science excursion corporal
just stay out of the way
kicker
defense droids
i 'm on it
leave him behind
no
he 's coming with us
how do you know
i just know
something 's wrong
keep trying
the power 's back up
then open the doors
thirty seconds
damn
close the door
i 'll be right back
what
i got ta go back
but
you son of a bitch you know what time it is
we just left old earth
you 'll never believe what we found
i 'm sending you the files
yeah yeah if this is another ancient farrari
trust me
i 'm bypassing regular channels
see what kind of payday we 're looking at
alright i 'm
no way
is this a joke
hypothetically how much are we talking
if you 're for real you 're looking at a million credits for viewing rights alone
does n't include touring and guest lectures
when can you get them here
i 'll reset our course
3 hours
see you then
doctor
where
who
i 'm alive
you brought me back
obviously so
we need to do some tests
i'd like to ask you a few questions
but
i
400 years
that 's right now if you could
jason
he 's on this ship
of course he is
he 's the most relevant find in 400 years
except for you of course
look if you 're worried about pr do n't be
you 're walking and talking
he 's a stiff
you 'll get the publicity
are you finished
jason
ca n't you see
he did this
impossible
he was dead before he entered cryo statis
there is no possible way he could be alive
i did n't say he was alive
azrael can you repeat that
get him out of there
that 's ridiculous
you 're overreacting
why do n't you get it
he 's going to kill us all
you 're not going anywhere
you wanna die
are we locked down
what good will that do
they can deal with this sort of thing
more soldiers
scientists
very intellegent men
that 's great
i bet they 'll kick jason 's ass at a spelling bee
guys please come with me
4you're not going anywhere
the hockey player
he a friend of yours
hockey player
he 's not a
he 's dead
everyone 's dead
old earth is dead
old earth
what have you done
what have i done
idiots
so you 're saying thse guys have like lasers and stuff
they could hack him to pieces
exactly
yes
listen up duck fuckers you ca n't kill this thing
listen to me
please
let 's get off thsi ship
come with me
rizzo a shuttle out in the middle of space
we 'll die oout there
can we get through these
sure but what good will that do
guys he 's right behind us
it 's okay
cut my hand
hit by a vampire
on the swing
i told you not to play near there until i sanded it down
see what your son did
my cars
and a comic book
here -- take him home
did you bring a check
what
cash
or do we do this on a handshake and a promise
i 'm authorized by the township of amity to hire you as an independent contractor
we 'll meet your price
10,000
and my regular daily rate -- 200 whether we catch him or not
you got it
and incidental damages if any
you got it
and you get the mayor off my back with this zoning crap
nobody tells me how to run my property
you got it
and uh a case of apricot brandy and you buy the lunch
two cases
and dinner when you land
try some of this
i made it myself
this is matt hooper
i know who he is
he 's from the oceanographic institute
hey
knock it off
i do n't want to have to listen to this while we 're out there
what do you mean we
it 's my charter
my party
all right commissioner
but when we 're on my ship i am master mate and pilot
and i want him
along for ballast
you got it
keep that chum line going -- we 've got five good miles
do n't break it
who 's driving the boat
nobody
we 're drifting with the current
why are we way out here when the shark 's back there
... 'cause this is where he lives
you got ta think like they do
you got it
get behind me dummy
reverse her and turn -- he 's taking too much line
wet my reel quick
the wire 's showing
unbuckle me -- fast
grab the leader
he ai n't normal this one
they never --
i never saw one that big
what do we do
get some help
radio in
why do n't we go in
get another crack at him tomorrow
we got a barrel on him
we ca n't lose him
we stay out here until we find him
let 's call in -- we can radio and have a big boat here in an hour
you hired me remember
it 's my 10,000
it 's my shark
look a that -- bayonet iwo jima
c'mon
middle appendix --
i almost had i m
what 's that one there
tattoo
had it taken off
he 's busting the shaft
start the pump
where
the bilge pumps
there --
that 's it
radio in for help
shut up
just pump her out
yeah captain as soon as i make a call
did you get him in the head
no
no
no
swing around
after him
he 's trying to sink us
dead astern
zig zag
he 's chasing us
i do n't believe it
full throttle
to port
he 's comin up --
he 's taken him
how come the sun did n't used to shine in here
'cause when we bought the house it was autumn
this is summer
feed the dogs
right
do you see the kids
probably out in the back yard
in amity you say yahd
the kids are in the yahd playing near the cah
how 's that sound
like you 're from n'yawk
give me 30 years i 'll get it
did you burn another kettle
y'know you 're a fire hazard
this is the third one
i never hear the whistle
feed the dogs
you want to go through those
i 'm taking them to the thrift shop
it 's marcia vaughn 's pet charity
pick out what you want to keep -- it 's mostly your city clothes
i used to wear this to the garden
garbage strikes
dog shit
muggers
ship it
do n't be silly you 're going to make summer better for them
do n't forget these
oh yeah
how do i look
older huh
i think they make you look sexy
love ya
hey chief
bring my cup back
you 're very tight y'know
right there
ow
he 's got ta be more careful in the water
can you stand something to eat
love a cup of tea
with lemon
mikey loves his birthday present
where is he
he 's sitting in it
it 's three feet deep martin
michael
come inside
it 's his birthday present and you closed the beach honey
i told him not to go in the water after what happened yesterday
i do n't believe he 'll ever do it again
i told him not to go out until he memorized the handbook and the safety safety regulations until he was sure of himself
how come you have to tell them that
excuse me but what are you talking about
did n't they catch the shark this afternoon
it was on the cape station news
you too sweetheart
thank you
why do n't we have one more drink you and i and then we go down and cut open that old shark and see for sure what 's inside him or not
can you do that
i am chief of police
i can do anything i want
you want to come
yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
what 'll i tell the kids
tell 'em i went fishin
martin
are you going to shut down the beach on your own authority
do i need any more authority
now tell me something i do n't know
all i 'm saying is that amity is a summer town -- we need summer dollars and if they ca n't swim here they 'll use the beaches at cape cod or long island
so we should set out a smorgasbord
i do n't think you can appreciate the gut reaction people have to these things
i was only reacting to what i was told
i ca n't work in a vacuum
why do n't you make hendricks chief
his family 's been here since the puritans -- half this island are his cousins
martin we hired the best man we could find
i 'll get to that in a minute
first i plan to start our seasonal summer help early and to use shark spotters on beaches open to the sea
i 'd like cooperation from local fishermen and i 've also contacted the oceanographic institute over on the mainland
no need to involve outsiders in our business martin
only 24 hours
i did n't agree to that
larry if you 'd see these clowns leave you 'd never believe they 'd come back with anything
but they got him
that 's good
that 's real good
ben meadows getting pictures for the paper
sure he is
she 's right
let 's all get out of here this place stinks
i 'm going home
he lost it on the way up
what kind of a shark did you say it was
we have got to close the beaches
we have got to get someone to kill the shark we need non corrosive mesh netting we need scientific support
it 's gon na cost money just to keep the nuts out and save what we have
i do n't thing either of you is familiar with our problems
you 'd love to prove that
getting your name in the national geographic
larry we can re open the beaches in august
august
tomorrow is the 4th of july and we are going to open for business
it 's going to be our best summer in years
if you 're so concerned about the beaches you two you do whatever you have to to keep them safe but with you or without you the beaches stay open this weekend
got a pen on you
why
there 's only one thing you 're good for anymore -- signing a damn voucher
here
it 's an authorization to employ a contractor
i do n't know if i can do that without a
i 'm going to hire quint to kill the fish
i want to see that shark dead
maybe we can save august
forget it
this summer 's had it
next summer 's had it
you 're the mayor of shark city
you wanted to keep the beaches open
what happens when the town finds out about that
i was acting in the town 's best interests
the best interest in this town would be to see that fish belly up in the water with a hole in his head
you do the right thing
you authorize me
right there
whatever it costs
my kids were on that beach
just sign it larry
there 's a fantail launch out there that wo n't make it beyond the breakwater
you 're tellin me
i swear this town has gone crazy
officer i wonder if you could tell me where i could find chief brody
who are you
hooper matt hooper
from the oceanographic institute
... height and weight may only be estimated from partial remains
torso severed in mid thorax eviscerated with no major organs remaining
may i have a drink of water
right arm severed above the elbow with massive tissue loss from upper musculature
portions of denuded bone remaining
-- did you notify the coast guard
no it was local jurisdiction
left arm head shoulders sternum and portions of ribcage intact
please do n't smoke
with minor post- mortem lacerations and abrasions
bite marks indicate typical non frenzy feeding pattern of large squali possibly carchaninus lonimanus or isurus glaucas
gross tissue loss and post mortem erosion of bite surfaces prevent detailed analysis however teeth and jaws of the attacking squali must be considered above average for these waters
-- did you go out in a boat and look around
no we just checked the beach
it was n't an accident it was n't a boat propeller or a coral reef or jack the ripper
it was a shark
it was a shark
well if one man can catch a fish in 50 days then i guess 50 of these bozos can catch a fish in one day -- beginner 's luck
you did it
did ben gardner catch this
we ought to let it breathe
whatever
let 's all have a drink
drowning
lemme ask you something
is it true most attacks take place in three feet of water around 10 feet from the beach
yeah
like the kid on your beach
i wish i could 've examined that shark they caught
something else
do most attacks go unreported
about half of them
a lot of missing swimmers are really shark victims
there 's a kind of a lone shark called uh
rogue
yeah
rogue
picks out an area where there 's food and hangs out there as long as the food supply lasts
it 's called territoriality
it 's a theory
and before 1900 when people first starting swimming for recreation before public bathing and resorts there were very few shark attacks cause sharks did n't know what they were missing
you could say that
... and it was dartmouth winter weekend and she was homecoming queen and i was her date then she got into the fact that her family had more money than my family and she was right -- her great grandfather was in mining and my ancestors were yankee shipbuilders
so we broke up and i went home with some beatnik from sarah lawrence
what stinks so bad
our friend the shark
what 's that
half a flounder
hmmm
a burlap bag
a paint can
aha
what
what
just as i thought
he drifted up here with the gulf stream from southern waters
how can you tell
florida license plate
he ate a car
no but tiger sharks are the garbage cans of the ocean
they eat anything
but this one did n't eat any people
there 's nothing here
... nothing
what do we do
if you 're looking for a shark you do n't look on land
you go out and chum for him
chum
only one sure way to find him -- offer him a little something to eat
chum -- blood waste meat fish anything
they can sense it miles away
if he 's out there we might be able to get a closer look at him
it 's a good time too
they 're night feeders
what is all this stuff
depth finder fathometer sonar closed circuit tv -- fore and aft -- rdf single side band
and two loose nuts behind the wheel
can you tell from that if a big man- eater is around
sometimes
look here -- something big probably a school of mackerel clumped together
and staying right with us
where 'd you get all this
i bought it
both sets of grandparents set up trust funds for me stocks went up so i do n't have to touch my principal
you 're at the institute full time
or do you have a job
it is a job
i 'm not fooling around like some amateur
it 's my life
we got ta get back soon
what happened
i want to check something
hold my feet
you all right
a white
a great white i found a tooth buried in the hull
he must 've attacked
i knew it
gardner 's dead in there
i did n't see the mate
no shark did that to a boat
there is a kind of shark called a great white shark that every expert in the world agrees is a maneater
you 're situation here suggests that a great white has staked out a claim in the waters around amity island and that he will continue to feed here as long as there is food in the water
there 's no limits to where he can strike and we 've had three attacks and two deaths in the past few days
it happened like this before in 1916 when a great white killed five swimmers at jones beach in long island
a shark 's attack is stimulated by the kind of splashing and activity that occurs whenever humans go swimming -- you ca n't avoid it
a 4th of july beach is like ringing a dinner bell for chrissake
i just pulled a shark tooth the size of a shot glass out of the hull of a wrecked boat out there
we towed ben gardner 's boat in larry he was dead and his boat was all chewed up
i 'm familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this thing until it swims up and bites you on the ass
there are only two ways to solve this thing you can kill it or you can cut off its food supply
that means closing the beaches
wait a minute
i need you
out there is a perfect engine an eating machine that is a miracle of evolution -- it swims and eats and that 's all
look at that
those proportions are correct
i know sharks
i hope we get some more help
i wish it would rain
this has got to be one big violation
this is quite a place
what 's that a ship
you were on the indianapolis
in 45
jesus
what the hell
it 's a whale out there
what day is this
wednesday
no it 's tuesday i think
think the tide 's with us
just keep kicking
y'know i used to hate the water
i ca n't imagine why
christine what
worthingsly
worthington -- no one ever died on me before
you picked her up on the ferry
i did n't know her
and nobody else saw her in the water
somebody could 've -- i was sort of passed out
think she might 've run out on you
oh no sir
i 've never had a woman do that
i 'm sure she drowned
you from around here
no
cambridge
harvard
my family 's in tuxedo new york though
you here for the summer
some friends and me took a house
what d'you pay for a place just for the summer
a thousand apiece something like that
there 's five of us
and we each kick in a hundred a week for beer and cleaning stuff like that
pretty stiff
where 'd you hide the beach closed signs
we never had any
what 's the problem
polly told me to tell you there 's a scout troop in avril bay doing the mile swim for their merit badges
i could n't call them in there 's no phone out there
get out of there take these back to the office and make up some beach closed signs and let polly do the printing
what 's the matter with my printing
... so then denherder and charlie sat there trying to catch their breath and figuring out how to explain to charlie 's wife what happened to her freezer full of meat
that was n't funny
mrs. kintner must 've put her ad in field and stream
looks more like the readers of the national enquirer
we 're not even sure what it was
what else could 've done that
... and bill mayhew almost caught him in his net
doctor you 're the one who told me what it was
you wanna call it a night after here
it 's only two thirty
what are you tired
yeah charlie i got my second wind three nibbles back
leg of lamb this time
screw lamb -- let 's shoot the sirloin
we 're blowin half the bounty on bait --
one more after this then i 'm going home
set
you do this all the time right charlie
twenty years
i ca n't believe that people pay money to go fishing
this is really dumb
this is n't even relaxing
it 's just boring
look at him take it
do i set the goddam hook
let him do it
go go go go go
hi
i 'm matt hooper
if your husband is here i 'd like to talk to him
so would i. come on in
would you like something
some coffee
is anyone having this
my husband tells me you 're in sharks
i would n't put it that way
but i love sharks
you love sharks
i do
but you 've still got a problem here there 's a shark just off the island somewhere
what have you got there lenny
we had a shark attack at south chop this morning mayor
fatal
got ta batten down the beach
who 've you told this to lenny
i just found out about it -- but there 's a bunch of boy scouts in the water a coupla miles down the coast from where we found the girl
avril bay thereabouts
chief went to dry them off
take my car okay
you come with us lenny
i 've got all these signs here
c'mon it 'll give us time to think about what they 're going to say
i 've been to sea since i was 12
i 've crewed three trans pacs --
transplants
-- and an america 's cup trials
i 'm not talking about day sailing or pleasure boating
i 'm talking about working for a living
sharking
and i 'm not talking about hooking some poor dogfish or sand shark
i 'm talking about a great white
are you now
i know about porkers in the water -- here
tie me a sheepshank
i do n't need to pass basic seamanship
let me see your hands
ha
city hands
you been counting money
if you had a 5000 net and 2000 worth of fish in it and along comes mr. white and makes it look like a kiddy scissors class has gone to work on it and made paper dolls
if you 'd ever worked for a living you 'd know what that means
look i do n't need to hear any of this working class hero crap
some party boat skipper who 's killed a few sharks
hey squirt
you want to stow this gear or you want me to use it for ballast
it ai n't good for much but bait
i 'll see ya
tell dorothy hello
hello junior
what are you
some kind of half assed astronaut
jesus christ when i was a kid every little squirt wanted to be a harpooner or a sword fisherman
what d'ya have there -- a portable shower
anti shark cage
who 's inside you or the shark
what 's that supposed to prove
just a little appetizer
i want our porker to know we 're serving
i want to put some iron into that big yap
that 's pilot whale is n't it
it ai n't a big mac
the expert do n't approve
what do you thing
you 're closer to the situation
hey you
farmer
half speed there
aye aye sir
stand by to repel boarders
poop the mainsail
argh jim boy
gettin ready to run again -- no
no
what 's he playin here
put the gloves on
let 's see who 's gon na tease who now
let it go do n't waste your time
down here hooper
i do n't know what it is but it 's not a shark
look -- you may be a big yahoo in the lab but out here you 're just supercargo and you 'll do as i say or you can take your gear and backstroke home
now get down here
a marlin or a stingray
huh
do n't ever tell me my business again
get back up on the bridge
i 'm okay
fasten the pole
over there
what do you see
at least you handle the boat all right
stop
here
cut the engine
20 feet if it 's an inch
25 feet
and three tons of him there
wire burn
trying to stop a backstay from taking my head off
moray eel
bit right through a wet suit
i 'll drink to your leg
and i 'll drink to yours
... mako
fell out of the tail rope and onto the deck
you do n't get bitten by one of those bastards but twice -- your first and your last
i think i can top that mister
do n't tell me -- death before dishonor
mother
semper fi
uhhh
do n't tread on me
c'mon -- what
u.s.s indianapolis
1944
easy
it 'll tear right out
the shaft is giving
coming right to us
no -- comin right at us
slow ahead he 'll hit us head on -- slower
throttle back ---
he 's heading under --
no way
he ca n't
follow him
he 's under
what can that gun of yours do
power head with 20 ccs of strychnine nitrate
if i can hit him
i can kill him
but i got ta be close
very close
is that tooth here
did anyone see it
i do n't have it
carcaradon carcharias
a great white
well i 'm not going to commit economic suicide on that flimsy evidence
we depend on the summer people for our lives and if our beaches are closed then we 're all finished
sick vandalism
brody that 's a deliberate mutilation of a public service message
i want those little paint happy bastards caught and hung up by their baby buster browns
that 's it
i 'm standing here arguing with a guy who ca n't wait to be a hot lunch
goodbye
paul
are you coming downstairs to eat
i do n't think so
you ran eight miles today puppy
i 'm not hungry oddly
but it 's breakfast for supper
your favorite paulie
i made french toast and sausage
patties not linkies just like you like it
juno macguff called while you were out running
she wants to know if you 're coming to her little coffeehouse performance on saturday
thanks for the message
you know how i feel about her
you 've mentioned it about fifty times
i just hope you do n't consider her a close friend
hey bleek
hey cool tiger
looks proud
yeah i swiped it from ms. rancick
cool
your shorts are looking especially gold today
my mom uses color safe bleach
go carole
so guess what
i do n't know
i 'm pregnant
when i see them all running like that with their things bouncing around in their shorts i always picture them naked even if i do n't want to
i have intrusive thoughts all the time
i 'm supposed to be running
i know
so what do you think we should do
i thought i might you know nip it in the bud before it gets worse
because i heard in health class that pregnancy often results in an infant
yeah typically
that 's what happens when our moms and teachers get pregnant
so that 's cool with you then
yeah wizard i guess
i mean do what you think is right
i 'm real sorry i had sex with you
i know it was n't your idea
whose idea was it
i 'll see you at school o.k.
hey juno
a couple of us are going to the cineplex after school to donut that movie with the guy with eighteen kids
sorry bleek
going for my ultrasound
got ta note and everything
okay cool
i 'll try to drop by later
what 's up
i just wanted to come over
you know say hi
i miss hanging out with you on school nights
i miss it too
so it looks like you 're getting pregnant er these days
yeah
um i hooked up a whole private adoption thing
these married people in saint cloud are going to be the parents
really
what are they like
the guy is super cool
his name is mark and he 's into old horror movies and he plays guitar
i actually hung out with him today
is that normal
i asked my dad and bren not to narc us out to your folks so we should be safe
oh
that 's a relief
i 'm going to really start looking like a dork soon
will you still think i 'm cute if i 'm huge
i always think you 're cute
i think you 're beautiful
jesus bleek
well i do
hey junebug when all this is over we should get the band back together again
yeah
sure
once tino gets a new drumhead we should be good to go
we could get back together too
were we together
well we were once
you know that time
what about katrina de voort
you could go out with katrina de voort
i do n't like katrina
i totally heard you did
i do n't
katrina smells like soup
her whole house smells of soup
you 're being really immature
what
that 's not how our thing works
i hurl the accusations and you talk me down remember
not this time
you do n't have any reason to be mad at me
you broke my heart
i should be royally ticked at you man
i should be really cheesed off
i should n't want to talk to you anymore
why
because i got bored and had sex with you one day and then i did n't like marry you
like i 'd marry you
you would be the meanest wife of all time
and anyway i know you were n't bored that day because there was a lot of stuff on tv
the blair witch project was on starz and you were like oh i want to watch this but we should make out instead
la la la
forget it bleek
take katrina the douche packer to the prom
i 'm sure you guys will have a really bitchin time
yeah well
i still have your underwear
i still have your virginity
oh my god shut up
what
are you ashamed that we did it
no
well at least you do n't have to walk around with the evidence under your sweater
i 'm a planet
wait let me take that
huh
you should n't be carrying that heavy bag
i 'll take it
oh
it 's fine
what 's another ten pounds
did you put like a hundred things of tic tacs in my mailbox
yeah
that was me
why
because they 're your fave
and you can never have too much of your favorite one calorie breath mint
well
thanks
i think i 'm pretty much set until college on the tic tac front
you know i 've been thinking
i 'm really sorry i was such a huge bitch to you
you did n't deserve that
you never deserve any of the poo i unload on you
you know it 's okay
also i think i 'm in love with you
what you mean as friends
no for real
i think you are the coolest person i 've ever met
and you do n't even have to try
i try really hard actually
no you 're naturally smart
you always think of the funniest things to do
remember when you passed me that postcard during spanish class and it was addressed like junebug macguff row 4 third seat from the blackboard
and it said i 'm having fun in barcelona -- wish you were here
that was hilarious
i was just bored
i only think school is awesome like 80 of the time
plus you 're the only person who does n't stare at my stomach all the fucking time
you actually look at my face
and every time i look at you the baby starts kicking me super hard
it does
wizard
i think it 's because my heart starts pounding when i see you
mine too
basically i 'm completely smitten with you and i do n't care if i 'm making an ass out of myself right now because you 've seen me make an ass out of myself a million times and you still want to be my friend
well yeah
you 're the best friend i 've ever had even when you 're being kind of evil
that 's all i need from you
that 's more than i could ever ask for
you 're just golden dude
can we make out now
okay
you 're a part time lover and a fulltime friend
the monkey on your back is the latest trend
i do n't see what anyone can see in anyone else but you
here is the church and here is the steeple
we sure are cute for two ugly people
i do n't see what anyone can see in anyone else but you
we both have shiny happy fits of rage
you want more fans i want more stage
i do n't see what anyone can see in anyone else but you
you are always trying to keep it real
i 'm in love with how you feel
i do n't see what anyone can see in anyone else but you
i kiss you on the brain in the shadow of a train
i kiss you all starryeyed my body 's swinging from side to side
i do n't see what anyone can see in anyone else but you
the pebbles forgive me the trees forgive me
so why ca n't you forgive me
i do n't see what anyone can see in anyone else but you
hey man
oh hey vijay
did you hear juno macguff is pregnant
yup
just like our moms and teachers
yup
did you hear it 's yours
yup
what a trip man
i do n't really know anything about it
you should grow a moustache
you 're a real man now
i ca n't grow a moustache
it never comes in evenly
me neither
but i 'm going to stop wearing underpants in order to raise my sperm count
see you
what
i 'm not made of stone
well there we have it
would you like to know the sex
nails
really
no i mean the father
who 's the father juno
just tell it to me straight bren
do you think this is my fault
her mother 's fault
i think kids get bored and have intercourse
and i think junebug was a dummy about it
but we have to move on from here and help her figure it out
i 'm not ready to be a pop pop
you 're not going to be a pop pop
and juno 's not going to be a ma
somebody else is going to find a precious blessing from jesus in this garbage dump of a situation
i friggin hope
did you see it coming when she sat us down here
oh god yeah
but i was hoping she was expelled or into hard drugs
that was my first instinct too
or d.w.i. anything but this
and i 'm going to punch that bleeker kid in the weiner the next time i see him
oh mac no
he 's a sweet kid
you know it was n't his idea
juno
did you happen to barf in my urn
mac you know that nice urn by the front door the one i got up in stillwater
i found some weird blue shit i mean stuff gunk in there this morning
i would never barf in your urn brenda
maybe l.b. did it
i have no idea how to spit this out
hon did you get expelled
no
the school would probably contact you in the event of my expulsion
well i was just asking
it seemed plausible
oh god
but i 'm going to give it up for adoption
i already found the perfect people
but they have a real lawyer and everything
i 'm going to meet with them next weekend
junebug that is a tough tough thing to do
probably tougher than you can understand right now
well i 'm not ready to be a mom
no
well you 're a brave young lady
you 're made of stronger stuff than i thought
you 're a little viking
cool it
first things first we have to get you healthy
you need prenatal vitamins
incidentally they 'll do incredible things for your nails so that 's a plus
oh and we need to schedule a doctor 's appointment
find out where you 're going to deliver
the term deliver is so weird
can we not say deliver
where the hell have you been junebug
i drove to st. cloud to show mark and vanessa the ultrasound
and i wound up staying for a couple of hours
a couple of hours
why are you going up there in the first place
they said they wanted to know about this stuff
they said to keep them updated so i did
you could have sent it to them
why would you drive an hour out to east jesus nowhere
i do n't know i just did
and while we were waiting for vanessa mark and i watched the wizard of gore and he burned me some cds of weird music
he 's kind of cool
ow ow fuckity ow
bren when do i get that spinal tap thing
it 's called a spinal block and you ca n't have it yet honey
the doctor said you 're not dilated enough
you mean i have to wait for it to get even worse
why ca n't they just give it to me now
well honey doctors are sadists who like to play god and watch lesser people scream
shit
hey can we give my kid the damn spinal tap already
it really did n't hurt that bad having him
so juno
first off how far along are you
i 'm a junior
no i mean in your pregnancy
oh
uh my stepmom took me to the doctor yesterday and they said i was twelve weeks
yeah
yeah
the way people used to do it
quick and dirty like ripping off a band aid
well then we agree a traditional closed adoption would be best for all involved then
shit yeah
close it up
amanda i told you to go to the infirmary and lie down
you never listen
no josh i do n't take orders
not from you and not from any man
you know you 've been acting like this ever since i went up to see my brother at mankato
i told you nothing happened
something happened
because your eyes
are very cold
they 're very cold josh
they 're cold lying eyes
what
my eyes are not lying
yes they are josh
since mankato they have been lying eyes
good
call me when you 're off the rag
fine
call me when you learn how to love just one person and not cheat at your brother 's college just because you had four smirnoff ices and a bottle of snow peak peach flavored boone 's
good i 'll be sure to do that amanda
i 'll make a note of it
this is our attorney gerta rauss
geeeerta rauuuss
no
cool
well let 's sit down and get to know each other a bit
whoops
yikes i did n't expect to see you up here
sorry
i was just getting something
did your wife send you up here to spy on me
what
no
do we come off like paranoid yuppies or something
well you do n't just invite a random pregnant teenager into your house and leave her unsupervised
i could be a total klepto for all you know
i do n't get a klepto vibe from you
evil genius
maybe
arsonist
would n't rule it out
i did steal a squirt of perfume
what do you think
it 's clinique happy
am i supposed to feel happy now
you should be happy holmes
i 'm giving you and vanessa the gift of life
sweet screaming pooping life
and you do n't even have to be there when the baby comes out of me all covered in
viscera
blood and guts
we 'd better get back downstairs asap
oh
that 's uh my room
vanessa lets me have a room for all my old stuff
wow you get a whole room in your own house
she 's got you on a long leash there mark
shut up
it 's beautiful
i 've always liked gibson better than fender
what do you play
i rock a harmony
oh
what
i 'm a pawn shop rocker
sorry
i swear i 'm not a gear snob
what is that mahogany
what happens if you crack the neck
tell me about it
i used to play in a really tight band back when i lived in chicago and one night we opened for the melvins
do you know who the melvins are
yeah
well we were playing with them and i busted this guitar onstage
it cost me 800 and a dime bag just to have it fixed
when was this like 96
93
i 'm telling you that was the best time for rock and roll
nuh uh 1977
punk volume 1
you were n't there so you ca n't understand the magic
you were n't even alive
your guitar is named kimber
yeah
that 's all right
my axe is named roosevelt
after franklin not ted
franklin was the hot one with the polio
juno
wow i did n't expect to see you here
i 've got something really cool to show you guys
is vanessa here
no she 's working late tonight
she 's trying to accrue some extra time off for when you know
right
i hear they can be kind of a time suck
come on in
you wanna ginseng cooler
sure
what is it with you rich people and your herb infused juices
i do n't know
something to do with the four packs
they 're not bad
i think it kind of looks like my friend paulie
oh is he bald and amorphous
no he 's the dad
can you tell if it 's a boy or a girl
the doctor can tell but i decided not to know
i want it to be a big surprise
well it can really only go two ways
that 's what you think
i drink tons of booze so you might get one of those scary neuter babies that 's born without junk
junk
you know
it 's parts
i know what junk is
yeah
we definitely want it to have junk
well do n't worry about it
my stepmom is forcing me to eat really healthy
she wo n't even let me stand in front of the microwave or eat red m&ms
hope you 're ready
what is it
it 's only my favorite song
it 's sonic youth doing superstar by the carpenters
i 've heard the carpenters before
chick drummer and freaky dude
not unlike the white stripes
you have n't heard the carpenters like this
listen
do n't you remember you told me you loved me baby
hey i like this
this album is all carpenters covers by alt rock bands
it 's called if i were a carpenter
it is god
i 'll rip a copy for you before you leave
you do n't have to do that
it 's the least i can do
what did you say your favorite band was
i did n't
but it 's a three way tie between the stooges patti smith and the runaways
yeah i definitely need to make you some cds
at least while my kid is hanging out in there
the wizard of gore
oh yeah
it 's herschel gordon lewis
he 's the ultimate master of horror
please
dario argento is the ultimate master of horror
argento 's good but lewis is completely demented
we 're talking buckets of goo
red corn syrup everywhere
and fake brains up the yin yang
frankly this looks kind of stupid
this is even better than suspiria
you 've got decent taste in slasher movies mark
here 's to dovetailing interests
so have you and vanessa thought of a name for the baby yet
well sort of
vanessa likes madison for a girl
madison
is n't that kind of
i do n't know gay
god pretentious much
i guess everyone should have a mysterious name like juno huh
my dad went through this phase where he was obsessed with greek and roman mythology
he named me after zeus 's wife
i mean zeus had other lays but i 'm pretty sure juno was his only wife
she was supposed to be really beautiful but really mean
like diana ross
that suits you
uh thanks
you know not many teenage girls in your situation would actually go through with this
i weighed my options
but after all this i 'm glad i did n't you know get rid of it
i want to have it
for you guys
you 're something else
hey what kind of swag did you score
yeah
mall madness huh
i doubt anyone 's throwing us a shower
why
cold feet
you should have gone to china
i heard they give away babies like free ipods
they shoot 'em out of those t shirt guns at sports events
hello
so i 've been spending a lot of time listening to that weird cd you made me
oh really
what 's the verdict
i sort of like it
i mean it 's cute
cute
well when you 're used to the raw power of iggy and the stooges everything else sounds kind of precious by comparison
i imagine you have a collection of punk chestnuts to prove your point
consider it your musical education
i 'm dying to see what you 've got to teach me
okay stop surfing porn and get back to work
just wanted to say hi
go learn something
wow
that shirt is working hard
is vanessa here
nope
we 're safe
cool
come on i have something for you
oh mark
is this the baby 's room
it 's beautiful
hilarious
no i just keep all of my old comics down here and i want to show you one of them
oh god you 're one of those guys
you 're gon na like this i promise
what
i actually know this one
you do
yeah this song 's older than me if you can believe that
i danced to it at my senior prom
that 's almost interesting mark
who did you dance with
her name was cynthia vogel and she was a good dance partner
even let me put my hands on her butt
oh man i can just picture you slow dancing like a dork
oh okay
like this
you 've never been to a dance have you
only squares and nerds go to dances
what are you
i do n't know
i 'm leaving vanessa
what
it 's just not working out but i 'm getting my own place in the city
and i 've got it all planned out
it 's something i 've wanted to do for a long time
no
no
no
no you definitely can not do that mark
that 's a big fat sack of no
what 's the matter
this is n't what we agreed on
you guys have to take care of
this
you are the chosen custodians of the big ass bump
but i thought you 'd be cool if
i want you guys to adopt the buglet
i wanted everything to be perfect
not shitty and broken like everyone else 's family
listen once i have the baby vanessa is going to finally be happy and everything will be all right
believe me on this one
a baby is not going to fix everything
besides i do n't know if i 'm ready to be a father
but you 're old
i
how do you think of me juno
why are you here
i do n't know
i just liked being your friend
i sort of liked becoming furniture in your weird life
this
this is what my life has become
stuff in boxes
stuff underground
is that so appealing to you
yeah i guess
is this my fault
is vanessa mad at you because of me
that 's not the point
we 're just not in love anymore
yeah but did n't you love vanessa when you married her
if you love someone once you can love them again i know it
my friend leah has gone out with the same guy like four times
you 're just not trying
please do n't get a divorce
god mark just do me a solid and stay with your wife
god you 're so young
not really
i 'm sixteen
i 'm old enough to tell when people are acting like total a holes
uh hi su chin
oh hi juno
how are you
good
i 'm good
did you finish that paper for worth 's class yet
no not yet
i tried to work on it a little last night but i 'm having trouble concentrating
you should try adderall
no thanks
i 'm off pills
wise move
i know this girl who had a huge crazy freakout because she took too many behavioral meds at once
she took off her clothes and jumped into the fountain at ridgedale mall and she was like blaaaaah
i 'm a kraken from the sea
i heard that was you
well it was nice seeing you
juno
your baby probably has a beating heart you know
it can feel pain
and it has fingernails
really
fingernails
wicked pic in the penny saver by the way
super classy
not like those other people with the fake woods in the background
like i 'm really going to fall for that you know
you found us in the penny saver
i 'll get drinks
what would everyone like
i 've got pellegrino vitamin water
a maker 's mark please
up
oh that 's marvelous
so you 're almost into your second trimester then
yeah apparently
i 'm having it on may 4
the tough part 's almost over for you
i mean my girlfriends always tell me the first couple months are the hardest
yeah but i hardly noticed it
i 'm more worried about the part where i have to start wearing jeans with an elastic panel in the front
i think pregnancy is beautiful
well you 're lucky it 's not you
well shall we start looking over the paperwork
gerta has already drafted some preliminary documents
can i use the facilities first
being pregnant makes you pee like seabiscuit
sure
the powder room down here is being re tiled but you can use the master bath upstairs
go up then turn left and on your right
room with a toilet got it
oh
sure
of course you 'd want to know how your kid is cooking
so then you really think you 're going to go ahead with this
i 'm going to say i 'm 104 sure
oh really
look if i could give it to you now i would
but it probably looks like a sea monkey at this point so i think we should leave it in there for a while until it gets cuter you know
juno
god you startled me
what are you doing here
what 's wrong
nothing
then what 's going on
i went to the doctor today
is the baby okay
sure
it 's the right size and everything
i even saw its phalanges today
check this
oh it 's just some stuff i picked up
for you know the baby
babies need a lot of things
i want everything to be just right
i thought people got all that stuff at baby showers
when my stepmom had my sister i remember she got about a million presents
they were all lame though so i was n't jealous
um i think people are kind of unsure about the situation because it 's not you know set in stone
what do you mean
you mean
do you think i 'm going to flake out on you
no no i do n't think that juno
it 's just that we went through a situation before where it did n't work out
right
well juno your parents must be wondering where you are
you might want to head home
naah
i 'm already pregnant so they figure nothing worse could happen to me
i got ta bounce anyway
it was nice seeing you guys again
well hi vanessa
what brings you to the mall today
just you know shopping with my girlfriends
no
please excuse leah
she 's mentally challenged
oh okay
so
how are you feeling
happy
oh you mean like physically
i 'm good
look i have a snooze button now
um
juno can i -- can i touch it
are you kidding
everyone at school is always grabbing at my belly
i 'm like a legend
they call me the cautionary whale
oh my god -- it moved
i felt it
elbow
wow
it 's magical
juno
what 's going on
nothing
would you like some free condoms
they 're boysenberry
no thank you
i 'm off sex
my partner uses these every time we have intercourse
they make his balls smell like pie
congrats
you should have seen this octopus furnace
i had to get out my hazmat suit just to get up in there
my dad used to be in the army but now he 's just your average hvac specialist
he and my mom got divorced when i was five
she lives on a havasu reservation in arizona
so juno how did your maneuver go last night
which maneuver sir
the one in which i moved an entire living room set from one lawn to another or the one in which i cleared a sixty four ounce blue slushie in ten minutes
do you need a large sum of money
legal counsel
no no i 'm definitely not asking for anything
except maybe mercy
like it would be really great if nobody hit me
what have you done junebug
did you hit someone with the previa
they say they 're going to pay my medical expenses and everything
i promise this will all be resolved in thirty odd weeks and we can pretend it never happened
you 're pregnant
i 'm so sorry you guys
if it 's any consolation i have heartburn that 's like radiating down to my kneecaps and i have n't gone number two since wednesday
morning
who is the kid
the baby
i do n't know anything about it yet
i only know it 's got fingernails allegedly
what
paulie bleeker
i did n't know he had it in him
okay this is no laughing matter
no it 's not
paulie is virile by the way
he was very good in
chair
i thought you were the kind of girl who knew when to say when
i have no idea what kind of girl i am
she 's joking
junebug has a wonderful sense of humor which is just one of her many genetic gifts
i also have good teeth
no cavities
we finally got fluoridated water in dancing elk
excuse me
well no
i 'm not going to sell the baby
i just want it to grow up with people who are ready to love it and be parents
i 'm in high school dude
i 'm ill equipped
hi dad
hey big puffy version of junebug
where have you been
dealing with stuff way beyond my maturity level
where is everyone
bren took liberty bell to her tot ice skating class
tot ice skating
tots ca n't ice skate
liberty bell 's still getting the hang of stairs
no but you know bren
she dreams big
yeah she does
you look a little morose honey
what 's eating you
i 'm losing my faith in humanity
think you can narrow it down for me
i guess i wonder sometimes if people ever stay together for good
you mean like couples
yeah like people in love
are you having boy trouble
i got ta be honest i do n't much approve of you dating in your condition 'cause
well that 's kind of messed up
dad no
well it 's kind of skanky
is n't that what you girls call it
skanky
skeevy
please stop now
tore up from the floor up
dad it 's not about that
i just need to know that it 's possible for two people to stay happy together forever
or at least for a few years
it 's not easy that 's for sure
now i may not have the best track record in the world but i have been with your stepmother for ten years now and i 'm proud to say that we 're very happy
i sort of already have
well of course
your old d a d
you know i 'll always be there to love and support you no matter what kind of pickle you 're in
what
either i just pissed my pants or
or
thundercats are go
well well
if it is n't macguff the crime dog
back for another test
i think the last one was defective
the plus sign looked more like a division sign
maybe you 're having twins
maybe your little boyfriend 's got mutant sperms and he knocked you up twice
silencio
i just drank my weight in sunny d. and i have to go pronto
yo yo yiggity yo
i am a suicide risk
is this juno
no it 's morgan freeman
got any bones that need collecting
only the one in my pants
dude i 'm pregnant
maybe it 's just a food baby
did you have a big lunch
it 's not a food baby
i took three pregnancy tests today
i am definitely up the spout
how did you even generate enough pee for three pregnancy tests
i drank like ten tons of sunny delight
anyway yeah
i 'm pregnant
and you 're shockingly cavalier
is this for real
like for real for real
unfortunately yes
oh my god
oh shit
phuket thailand
that 's the kind of emotion i was looking for in the first take
well are you going to go to havenbrooke or women now for the abortion
you need a note from your parents for havenbrooke
i know
women now i guess
the commercial says they help women now
want me to call for you
i called for becky last year
eh i 'll call them myself
but i do need your help with something very urgent
heavy lifting can only help you at this point
that is sick man
so you were bored
is that how this blessed miracle came to be
nah it was a premeditated act
the sex i mean not getting pregnant
when did you decide you were going to do bleeker
like a year ago in spanish class
aha
you love him
it 's extremely complicated and i 'd rather not talk about it in my fragile state
so what was it like humping bleeker 's bony bod
it was magnificent man
what are you doing here dumbass
i thought i was supposed to pick you up at four
i could n't do it leah
it smelled like a dentist in there
they had these really horrible magazines with like spritz cookie recipes and bad fiction and water stains like someone read them in the tub
and the receptionist tried to give me these weird condoms that looked like grape suckers and she told me about her boyfriend 's pie balls and su chin kuah was there and she told me the baby had fingernails
fingernails
oh gruesome
i wonder if the baby 's claws could scratch your vag on the way out
i 'm staying pregnant le
keep your voice down dude my mom 's around here somewhere
she does n't know we 're sexually active
what does that even mean
anyway i got to thinking on the way over
i was thinking maybe i could give the baby to somebody who actually likes that kind of thing
you know like a woman with a bum ovary or something
or some nice lesbos
but then you 'll get huge
your chest is going to milktate
and you have to tell everyone you 're pregnant
i know
maybe they 'll canonize me for being so selfless
maybe they 'll totally shit and be super mad at you and not let you graduate or go to cabo san lucas for spring break
bleeker and i were going to go to gettysburg for spring break
well maybe you could look at one of those adoption ads
i see them all the time in the penny saver
there are ads
for parents
oh yeah
desperately seeking spawn
they 're right by the ads for like iguanas and terriers and used fitness equipment
it 's totally legit
come on leah
i ca n't scope out wannabe parents in the penny saver
that 's tacky
that 's like buying clothes at the pump n munch
the penny saver sucks
yeah but it sucks for free
check out baby big head
that kid is scary
hey i 'm a sacred vessel
all you 've got in your belly is taco bell
touche
it is really weird looking
it 's like it 's not even real
i ca n't believe there are saps who actually cry at these things
aw please junebug
no way
no i definitely do n't want to know
how do you know i 'm so poisonous
like what if the adoptive parents turn out to be evil molesters
or stage parents
yum
this pretzel tastes like a friggin donut
share the love tits
hly shht
what
that 's her
that 's vanessa loring
of the penny saver lorings
no way
she 's pretty
you sound shocked or something
i just thought she 'd look really old in real life
she 's gon na steal that kid for her collection
right seriously
god why is everyone always staring at me
well you are kind of
convex
wow someone 's been actually doing her geometry homework for once
i do n't have a choice
keith 's been grading me really hard lately
please do not refer to mr. conyers as keith okay
my barf reflex is already heightened these days
keith 's hot
eww he 's all beardy
did you hear bleek is going to prom with katrina de voort
katrina
pfft no way
he does n't like katrina
it must be a pity date
he asked her
i heard they were going to benihana then the prom then to vijay 's parents cabin
bleeker told me katrina 's whole house reeks of soup
oh it totally does
i was there for her birthday about four years ago and it was like lipton landing
but you know boys have endured worse things for nookie
there 's no way in hell they 're having sex or even holding hands
i would n't be so sure about that
he did it with you
he 's a man now
yeah well bleek trusted me
we 're best friends
are you jealous
i thought you said you did n't care what he did
i 'm not jealous and i do n't care
i just know he does n't like katrina and i do n't think he should toy with her emotions like that
she seems so nice and all
okay juno i 'm really convinced
prom is for wenises anyway
once you 're old enough to go it 's not cool anymore
hello
thank you for having me and my irresponsible child over to your home
oh no
thank you
come on in
you do n't say
well have n't you ever felt like you were born to do something
yes
heating and air conditioning
well i was born to be a mother
some of us are
so
what 's that thing
a pilates machine
what do you make with that
you do n't make anything
it 's for exercising
obviously we 'll compensate you for your medical expenses
are you looking for any other compensation
you 're doing an amazing and selfless thing for us
vanessa has wanted a baby since we got married
i want to be a mommy so badly
that wall is going to need something
maybe we could put our first family picture there
hm
can you see it
juno what 's the matter
she 's hormonal
right june
it 's just part of the whole process
what did you do
i did n't do anything
i just
i 've just been thinking
what
just thinking if this is really the right thing for us
what are you referring to
i 've been just wondering if we 're you know ready
of course we 're ready
we 've taken all the classes
the nursery
the books --
i know we 're prepared
i just do n't know if
i 'm ready
why do n't we let juno go home and we can discuss this later on okay
it all just happened so fast
we put that ad in the paper
i thought it would take months if you know ever and then -- boom -- two weeks later she 's in our living room
she answered our prayers
ever since it 's just been like a ticking clock
what would be a good time for you
i do n't know
there 's just things i still want to do
like what
be a rock star
do n't mock me
i called gerta rauss
she says she can represent both of us
they call it collaborative divorce
it 's apparently all the rage right now
and it 's easy because we do n't have children
no it 's fine
thanks for making the call i guess
we 're actually finally doing this
looks like it yeah
have you found a place to stay
yeah downtown
a hotel
it 's a loft
are n't you the cool guy
... you can forget about 'em forever and then look at 'em and they 're doin' even better than before
adele
we got ta do something before early kills someone else
... there ai n't nothin' can kill 'em
they can live for two even three hundred years
adele for god sake please lis
there ai n't nothing we could do
once early sets his mind on somethin' well that s the end of that
hi i 'm adele
carrie
... pardon
... i said i like your hair
... thank you
one night we figured out how much bad luck he must have comin from all them mirrors he broke
four hundred and ninety four years to work it all off
after he dies he 'll have to keep coming back to earth over and over and over
karma
what
karma
you know if you do something bad to somebody fate will pay you back by something bad happening to you
that french ai n't it
are you takin the pictures
... yeah
is it hard to learn
not really
you would n't have any color film would ya
... yeah sure
better not or early'd whip me
he whips you
... hey you 're good
thought you said you never played before
i have n't
i 'm a fast learner
i told you how early feels 'bout a woman drinking
how 'd you meet early
you know i can fix that haircut for you if you want
you can
i 'm cool
could i try that
what 's this
it 's a portfolio of my work
your pictures
can i see 'em
sure
you took this picture
took 'em all
that 's me
no it is not
hold still
sorry
boy i 'll tell ya if early found a picture of me like that i 'd be black and blue for a week
the police are after him he 's a murderer
... that 's not true
what
that 's not true
... i would n't lie to you adele
i saw him kill that man
early did n't kill nobody he would n't do that
i do n't know why you 're saying those things
you ai n't my friend
happy birthday adele
early you are so sweet
i feel kind of like the wizard of oz you know when she gets the red shoes
well dorothy why do n't you hand me that chili there
what 's up adele
dinner ready
almost
well
for one thing
they think faster out there on account of all that warm weather they got cold weather makes people stupid that 's a fact
i guess that 'd explain why there 's so many stupid people around here
yeah and in california you never have to buy fruit 'cause it 's all on the trees everywhere you turn
and course there ai n't no speed limit out there and all drugs are legal
and i heard your first month 's rent is free state law
i figure til we get settled we can just move around month to month
what 'll we do out there
well
the very first thing we 're gon na do
is get us a couple of six packs of lucky lager and climb up on toppa that famous hollywood sign and howl at the moon
you know
i read once
ai n't nothin' on that big old moon cept some old golf balls those astronauts left behind
bull
that ai n't right
government sends people there all the time just do n't want us to know about it
do n't be long now dinner 's 'bout ready
i heard that
geez they look kinda weird
you just smile let me do all the talking
how many times you gon na tell me that
as many times as it takes
shush adele
early can we stop there
just for a little while
can you believe thirty bucks for this room
for what
a lumpy mattress that crummy tv and a crapper
early sing me a song
early what 're you doin'
go back to the car and keep brian there
i do n't want him in here
do it adele
now
what the hell is this stuff
it 's chinese food
it was the only place open
you said you was starving you 'd eat anyth
yeah but what is it
i do n't know they did n't speak too good english
... thank you
thank you for what
what are you thanking me for adele
... i do n't know
well adele
it was for
saving your fucking life back there
what 's wrong with her
she had a dream that somethin' like this was gon na happen
what 's your name boy
walter livesy
think
i might just have to kill you walter
how do you feel about that
not so good
you sure you have to
i do n't know
wish i did
where you from walter
vernon florida
never heard of it any huntin
turkey mostly
turkey 's are real smart
smarter than most people think
... mind if i hold that bible
what do you need a bible for
you think i 'm goin' to kill you
well that 'd make me a liar then would n't it
no sir
tight fit
best kind
uh we can stop somewhere if you and adele have n't had time for breakfast early
well it 's like this mr. kessler
brian
well it 's like this bri
i do n't eat much in the mornin never have
maybe a beer once in a while lucky lager 's my favorite
so what do you do early
oh
i do some work up at the merrick mirror factory or i used to
you gon na talk to the people who did those murders
that 's a good idea
unfortunately most of them have been executed
... too bad
how did he get away with it for so long anyhow
he almost always killed strangers
spent years moving on from one place to another
that made it real hard to track him down
that bad
... then some
... they never caught that black dolya killer huh
dahlia no
now why is that
some people think it 's because he never killed again
he just disappeared back into society
you do n't sound too convinced 'bout that
i always thought it was the work of a serial killer
anyone who took that much time and care bisecting another human being must have been enjoying it and would have done it again
and again
until someone stopped him
that your
theory ai n't that what they call it
yeah
you wanna hear mine
sure
ai n't you goin' to record it
by the way i 'm not much of a pool player
shit it ai n't hard to play pool
i can teach you everything ya need ta know
yeah
hell yeah
i 'll even spot ya a few points first game
wait a minute
you 're gon na hustle me
nah
how much money have you got
... well i probably drunk more than my share anyway
you go on an have it
no it 's all yours
it 's on me
for saving my ass back there
... well then that 's how many i killed
if you say so
damn right i do
ya see what i 'm sayin
ha
... ha
... and
they picked up hitchhikers
young men
and brought them back here
you two been busy in here
what happened to adele
well let 's put it this way
i need me a new woman
executing the killer would n't bring my mother back
thank god
okay now you want to talk about good versus evil
well then let 's start with adam and eve and the snake
who do i have to blow to get out of here
a
i got ta go
tonight turned out to be pretty interesting
the party
the warehouse
i 'm not that drunk
it was definitely the high point of the evening
just being there where it really happened
it was different
more visceral
mmm
i love it when you talk like that
i thought you wanted to be a writer
... i do
then you can write anywhere
let 's get out of here while we still can
carrie come on
we can leave anytime we
no we ca n't
we can never leave once you start talking about tenure
and vacation pay
and parking privileges and
oh shit
let 's just go to california now right now before it 's too late
... just like that
just like that
load up the lincoln
point it west
stop when we hit the fucking ocean
... and i think i know why
why
because i was there
and for a moment that night i understood how she came to pull the trigger
this mean your finally going to finish your thesis
look fuck the thesis
i think there 's a book here
your photographs and my research together
a book on the warehouse murders
a book on some of the most infamous murderers in america
i want to go to where they lived and where they killed and i want you to photograph it
what i 'm thinking is we can drop down through tennessee across arkansas and into texas from there it 's a straight shot into california
we do n't stop
until we hit the fucking ocean
it 's about fucking time kessler
i 'd just about given up on you
we do n't have enough money but we 'll figure something out
what did he sound like on the phone
real polite
kept calling me sir
i like that
i still think we should have met them first
beggars ca n't be choosers
they were the only ones who answered the ride share note remember
oh yeah
he had a real thick accent right outta deliverance
still
who said anything about a still
get ya ass up in them woods
funny very funny
jesus
they 've probably got five bucks between them
turn around
lighten up
we could have been in and out of there in less than ten minutes
hey i got some great stuff
it 's okay
you mean because i object to having somebody take off their shoe and scratch their foot while i 'm eating i 'm prejudiced
he ca n't help the way he was raised
i kinda feel sorry for him
all set
fuck
take your time
who said he 's my good buddy
you sure been acting like you were
out whoopin it up a drankin and ever thang
yeah and you should 've seen how terrified she was that he 'd find out
he beats her
how do you know that
she told me
but only when she deserves it
did you know he was in jail
stop being so fucking melodramatic
if it was murder he 'd still be locked up or on parole in which case he would n't be allowed to leave the state
maybe he was n't allowed to leave
geezus brian
what is it
look again
what 's that
a copy of a tape they found
he recorded everything
there 's more
i 'm finished
i 'm scared
a week ago you would never have even thought to pick up that gun
this afternoon you 're out there wielding it around like clyde fucking barrow for christ 's sake
what 's with you
okay it was a cheap thrill it was stupid i admit it alright
but let 's not blow this
not now
let 's just get the photos
i ca n't believe i agreed to do this
oh come on do n't give me that shit
you wanted to take these photos as much as i wanted you too
wrong
i was willing to do whatever it took to get you up off your ass and on the way to california
there 's a big difference
you got ta talk to her
she looks up to you she 'll listen to you
i tried talking to her at the mine
it did n't work
then try again
carrie watch for early
what are you going to do
i 'm going to try and lift the end of the piano
if i can
slide your cuffs free
what about you
i do n't know
any word from that gallery
not yet
nervous
... apprehensive
let 's not forget these are the people who banned the mapplethorpe show
anyway california 's loaded with galleries
you mean ted bundy 's finally agreed to leave
... soon as he finishes his thesis
listen eric 's been finishing his for over three years now
i 'm sorry but i just ca n't see you veggin out in la la land
oh i do n't know
i think that once i dye my hair blonde buy a string bikini and cultivate that tan
i could be veggin out with the best of 'em
like fer shurr
bri
where 's adele
she was n't feeling so good
... need a hand with those bags
no thanks i can manage
... never
no never
excuse me
tell ya bri
i 'm still a little sleepy
think adele and me are gon na take us a fiesta
siesta
early just think
shut your mouth
he 's a killer brian
he 's fucking insane
everybody just shut up
darlin you were 'bout that far from spendin the night at the morgue
you understand
he was n't going to shoot her you murdering son of a bitch
who d'ya think you 're foolin
i know you better than you think
... you 're hurting me
you were plenty hot
you sick twisted fuck
you do n't know shit about me
... you know what i mean
... i know i 'd love to smash this bottle right in your fucking face
you be at this personnel office friday three o'clock sharp
what is it
... janitor 's job
oh man
come on i do n't want no janitor job
what happened
who are you
his parole officer
right i talked to you on the phone
they say it 's a torch job that sound like your boy
could be
where would we find him
hell if i know crazy son of a bitch said he was thinking of moving to texas
without his car
what about the owner of the house
this john diebold any idea where he might be
no but i can tell you he 's not gon na be too happy about this
... diebold
... that 'd be my guess
looks like somebody cut off his ring finger
well now i 'd say that 's the least of mr. diebold 's problems
how old you
17
how many people have you had vaginal intercourse with
umm
altogether
yes
altogether
hmm
i 'd say eight maybe nine
how many times have you gone unprotected
with four of them i did n't use any kind of protection
wait maybe it was three
have you ever had anal intercourse
yes
with how many people
umm
three i believe
but i 'm not sure
were they wearing condoms
uh
yes
twice they were n't
two times they did n't
well girl
you tested negative for all sexually transmitted diseases and infections
yes
you 're clean
oh my god
i ca n't tell you how nervous i 've been
i could n't sleep last night
now you got ta be careful
i knew you fucked it
i sat out here for like two hours
that girl was like twelve and you hit it up
who am i
who am i
the mothafuckin virgin surgeon
well how was it
oh my god so good
that girl can fuck
she can fuck
hell yeah
that bitch was bleeding
when i first put it in she screamed real loud
i saw her bite down on the pillow
oh shit
how long did it take
did what take
how long did you fuck her
well it took me longer than i thought it would take
it took like 15 minutes to talk her into it
but once it was on we fucked for a good half an hour
i had to keep taking it out and putting it back in
it hurts the first time
yeah
but then when she got into it
she really got into it
it was good
how did she smell
did her puss stink
oh man it smells like butterscotch
hell 's yeah
she was so clean
oh man that 's the best
you could tell she took care of herself
she had all these powders and creams in her bathroom
let me smell it again
you know what else
what
i can tell that she had just entered puberty
how
well i was flipping through a picture book of her and her family right
right
and there was this picture of her painting easter eggs or something
and i said you were cute when you were little
yeah
and she goes yeah that picture was taken less than a year ago
i look younger without my makeup
and i looked at her and thought to myself oh my god this girl is a baby
yeah
and for a second i felt a little bit guilty
you know because she 's young and all
and then i was like oh shit that turns me on
i wanna fuck this little baby girl
i 'm telling you casper
i think i 'm getting addicted to that shit
to what
virgins
yeah
it 's like all i think about now
not just that it 's like lately during sex i start dreaming about these complex fantasies
what do you mean
i mean i 'm dreaming about going all out crazy shit
you mean like fucking two virgins at once
that would be good
but i mean more like
i do n't know
like when i was having sex with her i kept thinking how much i would like to put it in her ass
just to see what would happen
she 's probably smash you in the fucking face
i do n't know about that
she was pretty into it
but i was n't gon na try
the whole thing is you just got ta take it slow
show 'em some respect
did you tell her that you loved her
like
like
never love
love is for low level virgin seduction guys
shit
what do you want
get another forty
smoke a blunt
are you hungry
hell yeah
fuckin starvin
wait up a sec
you thirsty
yeah i feel dehydrated
you got any money
three pennies and a ball of lint
you down with the boost
unzip my pack yo
you know like in the wonder twins they share everything
the cartoon
yeah
the wonder twins
you know
activate in the form of a glass of water
yeah
well those guys share everything right
right
and once i saw this episode where they pretended they were each other
where they lived the other 's life for a day
you know those guys share everything right
right
and it got me thinkin
how fun it would be to share each other 's girl
yeah that would be fun but i do n't like any of the girls you go out with
like that one girl with two teeth and a clit ring
no i 'm serious man
i 'm dead ass
do you wanna try
we could be like the fuckin x rated wonder twins
can you do it man
can i do it
i just broke her cherry
i imagine i can make her do anything
bark like a dog jump through a ring of fire
that girl you boned last year
remember
man i have n't seen her in forever
what the fuck 's she up to
but that 's the thing
girl 's like it slow
they like romance
they like things to be sweet and romantic
yep
i mean i 've been with a lot of girls i know
yeah me too nigga
i hate this game
no
casper 's right
girls love it
they just act like they do n't in front of their friends
man this guy is really good
he looks like my uncle
i wanna fuck darcy
who
darcy
benny 's little sister
oh
you like her
yeah
i like her
i 've wanted to get with her for a while now
darcy
yeah
she 's so little so pretty and innocent
yeah
she 's only 13
it 's funny
last weekend at that block party
remember
yeah
she was handing out those watermelon slices
and i sat down over on the other side and i watched her
yeah
i watched her eat the watermelon
and all this juice started running down her chin and onto her shirt
yeah
and after about two seconds i got the biggest hard on
i do n't understand why you do that
why i do what
that
why i give pennies
yeah
why you give money
did you look at that guy
what the fuck
he had no legs
he had no half his lower body
he 's got ta shit out of his ribcage
that 's just it
it 's elitist
it 's reverse elitism
because you give money to whoever is the most fucked up
i notice what you do
what are you talking about
whenever you see someone who 's really messed up especially amputees and retards
you give them money
but if it 's just a regular bum you pass them by
so
so
these people live on the same streets
it 's just that you reserve your money for those people who are massively fucked up
the regular bums are n't poor enough for you you got ta give it to the bottom of the barrel scum fucks
so
you never know when you can end up like that
right
i 'll tell you why
because when i was little i had a fat cousin cousin luke
and he used to make fun of the handicapped
and one day he had a bad stomachache
so he drank a bottle of pepto and his ass blew off
shut up
i 'm telling you the truth
and after that i 've always givin my money to retards
because that 's the reverse of what he did
so really it 's good luck
good luck
yeah good luck
i mean what the fuck
the guy had no legs
man telly your little brother is getting big
yeah
holy shit man your mom 's got good titties
shut the fuck up
how much you gon na take
i do n't know
how much do you want
about ten
fifteen is good
fifteen for me
you think darcy is gon na be at nasa tonight
yeah probably
yo you got any weed around here
naw
but we should run by the park and get a dime
maybe darcy will be at the park
hurry up man
let 's be out
i wanna go swimmin
hold up man
casper
hey jennie
long time no see
what are you doing here
casper where 's telly
what do ya want with telly
that guy has enough bitches
casper where is he
do n't look for him
he 's doing fine
he 's got ta girl
he 's fuckin her right now in steven 's parents room
so do ya know joe
casper
was up kid
nothen b.
where you at
right here
where you goin' tonight
maybe nasa
i do n't know
you goin'
yeah
i 'm goin'
you on the list
probably
fuck that i 'll sneak in
i need some female vagina tonight
i had a female vagina last night
yo you think we killed that guy
na
you sure
i do n't know
but all i know is that i kicked him so many times my fuckin toe feels broken
yo we might have killed him
you think
man we fucked him up
hell ya
we broke that mothafucka
no i 'm serious
can i suck your tit
either of you guys
i do n't care
yeah me too
i do n't know
i just never seen girls that did that shit before
but i think it looks nice
yeah
do it again
yeah watch the fuck where you skate
you know what i 'm saying
yeah watch where you walk dukes
what
nuffin g. just forget it
what the fuck yo
you wanna catch a beat down
hey
hey
what are you doin' right now
i was just getting ready to take a bath
do n't take a bath
come swimmin with us
come on
come swimmin with us
right now
yeah
come on
hold on
ooh
you 're gon na give me goose bumps
is it cold
you know i 've been thinking about you lately
you have
yeah
after i saw you last week
at the block party
yeah
i was lookin for you all day today
you were
sure
i even thought about you when i woke up
i thought you had a girlfriend
naw
i 'm not seeing anybody
what about you
no
i ca n't
my mom wo n't let me have boyfriends
she wo n't
why not
i do n't know
i guess it 's cause my sister nicki had a baby when she was like 15
she was really young so my mom is like very protective over me
yeah
i can understand that
you should come back with me to steven 's house
tonight
yeah
his parents are away
it 's gon na be a bug out
i do n't know
i 'm supposed to go to nasa tonight
come on
you can rave on another night
come on
it 'll be fun
we 'll just bug out
there should be a bunch of people
it 'll be fun i promise
yeah
yeah
it 'll be nice
it 'll be a change of pace
that club shit gets boring
i do n't even want to talk but i got ta tell you that when i first saw you last week i i could n't stop thinking about you
you 've been stuck in my head
come on
no
no i 'm serious
i 'm not joking
i just like you
that 's all
i like you too
i 'm nervous
trust me
do n't be nervous
i like you so much
i think you 're beautiful
i think if we fucked you would love it
you would n't believe it
how do you know
i just know
i know you 'll love it
but i 'm scared telly
i 'm telling you
there 's nothing in the world to worry about
nothing
nothing
i 'm telling you i just want to make you happy
that 's all
just trust me
i do n't want you to hurt me
i do n't want you to hurt you
i 'll be gentle
do you care about me
of course i do
jennie jennie
how do you feel
fine fidget
what 's all this
oh man
you got ta see this
it 's a spectacle
a real spectacle
who are they
i do n't know
i 've never seen any of them before
cornballs from jersey on x. feelin the effex
what is it
bang up stuff
this makes special k look weak
it 's a euphoric blockbuster
no fidget i
come on jennie
you look sad
just take it
no
here
swallow
dance
what
come dance
i do n't feel so well
have you seen telly anywhere
telly is at steven 's
there 's a bunch of people over there
come on dance
telly is at steven 's
i guess so
how old are you
15
how many people have you had vaginal intercourse with
one
were you protected
have you ever had anal intercourse
no
jennie
you 've tested positive for the hiv infection
what
the test is n't one hundred percent accurate
you should
i tested positive
i 'm sorry
but i only had sex with telly
can i ask you a question
i 'm sorry
i do n't mean to be a pest
what
well i do n't mean to be a pest
it was just that i was looking at you
and you look upset
i liked looking at you but your face looks upset
and i was wondering if i could be of any assistance
maybe i could cheer you up or somethin
help make you happy
who knows
somethin' maybe
no
i 'm ok
thanks
you 're ok
yeah
because gee you do n't look ok
i mean you 're a very beautiful young lady
it 's just that you look troubled that 's all
yeah well it 's been a bad day
a bad day
you wanna hear a bad day
yesterday my son was smashed over by a car and when my wife found out she collapsed on the floor
she had a minor heart attack
partial paralysis
but i do n't let myself get sad
no way
not me
it 's not good for the soul
now that 's it
a smile
you look like a prom queen when you smile
like a glamour girl
yeah
oh yeah sure
when i was a kid i had a crush on the prom queen
darlene louis
she had a big black mole in the center of her face that used to get me so excited
darlene louis
you know you look a little bit like her
thanks
yeah
right around the cheeks and chin
boy did i have a crush on her
she was the first girl i ever put my tongue in her mouth
i swear to god
sometimes he barks
i can hear him straight off my arm
ruff ruff he goes
yeah
yeah
i 'm not saying you should get a tattoo
but you should make yourself happy
what if you ca n't make yourself happy
what if everything falls apart
well then i do n't know
you know what you do then
you forget
block it out
i remember when i was a little boy
my grandmother told me to be happy
she said
she said leon my darling little grandson
if you want to be happy do n't think
do n't bump into any walls
if you stutter
do n't talk and i took her advice
and look at me now
could n't be happier
your a real philosopher
yeah
i was gon na write a book but i ca n't spell
hello
hello paul
is telly inside
is telly there
this is paul
who is this
it 's jennie
just tell me if telly is there
oh hi jennie
do you want to come make out with me
i 'm fucking serious
where 's telly
telly 's not here right now
i believe he went downtown
casper too
telly says was up
i knew he would n't want to speak to me
that dick
you still mad at him
of course
how am i gon na forgive him after what he did
the pain
the fucking pain
and you feel like you 're being ripped open inside
you are being ripped open
i know
did you bleed
i did n't bleed
you did n't
no i did n't bleed
hell yeah
i love
i love sex
foreplay
foreplay
right
you 're like it 's just this instinct
it 's like this animal instinct is taking over you
it 's like
passion
boom
boom
i hate sucking dick
yeah
'cause they fucking shoot you in the eye the face the ear
and sometimes it takes a long time and you 're fucking gagging
yeah
and then it hits that little thing
that little punch bag
what is it
the tonsils
the esophagus whatever
yeah
and you 're not getting anything out of it
and it 's like
how much more can i bob here
you know
wish me luck
good luck
shh
come on it 's gon na be ok
that 's it
i 'm gon na have to tell my little brother i 'm gon na die
i ca n't make him his lunches anymore
come on
do n't cry
we 'll work it out
i only did it once and
i got ta go
i got ta find telly
do n't go anywhere
stay with me
i got ta find him
i 'm coming
no
i just got ta go find him
just a lot of crazy shit
yeah
yeah
have you seen telly around
yeah
speaking of stupid shit
him and his ape ass of a friend casper they all just almost killed some kid
what happened
i do n't know
just some messy little scrap
you know that bullshit
do you know where he went
i 'm not sure
he said something about meeting darcy
i think he likes her now
who benny 's little sister
yeah
she should be at nasa tonight
why you lookin for him
you like him now or sometin
uh let 's see here would you happen to have diss digg
whah
diss digg
i 'm curious if you have it
whah is dissdee
diss digg diss digg diss digg
i no understand you
maybe crazy
you know
you know a lot of times sex gets in the way
has that ever happened to you
yep
you know
because sometimes the foreplay is just so good
and then when it actually comes time for sex
it 's like the worst letdown
i was like yes
i 'm going out with him
that 's right
that 's why foreplay is better than sex
yep
because he can like climax you up to that
and you do n't get shit out of it
have you ever swallowed it before
yep
that 's the best way
it 's that boom boom boom
right
you know it 's not like
you know there 's a difference between sex making love and fucking
yep
making love is like
sweet
yeah
it 's like
you know what it 's like
it 's like when you really love someone it 's like awww
yeah
its like
but it gets boring
it 's boring
it 's really slow
it 's slow boring
yeah
mine are my toes
oh my god if someone sucks my toes i 'll come in like ten seconds
yeah
it depends
cause like this one time with eric when we got blasted at his house
and smash j and dj flipper was there
oh shit
and we were blasted and he must have been dumb horney
and he just pulled me over to the bed
and they were in the room like getting dressed like getting ready to go to go to disco
yep
but then the sex gets into the way and you 're like what happened
what the hell happened
yeah it 's the biggest disappointment
yeah
the shit gets wacked
fifteen minutes
yeah
fifteen minutes to a half an hour
hard and deep
me
i can only take it up to fifteen minutes
cause i get bored
yeah i get bored
i start thinking about what i 'm gon na eat afterwards
how can you hang out with casper
he 's such a jerk
you think so
yeah
i 've always hated that kid
he used to eat glue in like seventh grade
he still does
i hate 'em
it 's not his fault
he had a hard life
yeah
you 've heard the stories right
no
so that 's why casper is how he is
oh god
that 's horrible
yep
holy shit
that 's all true
no
i was just kidding
what
i lied
his dad is still alive
he works for the post office
hi mom
hi telly
where you been
sorry
dad made me promise not to give you any money until you find a job
but then i wo n't need your money
that 's right
mom
shh
i 'm gon na go out for a little while
when are you gon na be back
not too late
four thirty in the morning
not too late
hey mom
are you sure i ca n't get any money
just a few bucks
if i had it maybe
but right now i do n't have a penny to my name
all right
hello
it 's me
telly
hello
paul it 's telly
open up
that 's the whole thing
you know if you look at it
i mean all you hear about is disease this and disease that
and everyone 's dying
and you better wear a condom or else
but the truth is
i do n't know any kids with aids
no one i know has ever died from that shit
it 's like some weird make believe story that the whole world believes
yep
first times are always wacked
just be glad you did n't lose your virginity in the backseat of a rental car
that shit is nothin'
i remember i had just turned 14
with this fuckin asshole who was like 18
i do n't even remember his name
i think it was john or jake or something
i remember he had a brother named lentil because i would always joke and call him lentil bean
this was away at like sleep away camp with your friends and shit
slow
it 's grandmother style
yeah
it 's very monotonous
right
and we were like underneath the sheets
we were going at it like crazy
oh my god that shit was so good
it was like hard
yeah
he was like sucking my tits
he was fucking fingering me
but that shit was nice and hard
yeah
and it takes them either too long or too short to come
have you ever had someone that took forever
to come
yeah
i had sex with jake and it took him like an hour and a half
it was
it was
it 's like sweet and sour and salty butter
no no no
you ca n't get that taste out of your mouth
until you eat something
yeah
you can drink like there 's no tomorrow but you still ca n't get that sperm between the teeth out
it 's so disgusting
what man
what is it
yo let me get in your parent 's room man
just fir a little while
i ca n't man
come on steven hook me up
do me this solid
come on man
i got ta get darcy alone
she 's gon na let me fuck her man
please
shit
all right
but do n't fuck with anything ok
ok
we seem to have a little problem here
what kind of problem
i think you 're lying
that 's what kind of problem
what are you saying
casual
casual
you were boning her were n't you
it was n't serious
what 's your problem
you are
i do n't like you
fine do n't ask me out on a date
what 's that supposed to mean
it means if i were a killer and i thought the police were closing in on me i might invent someone to try and put them off the scent
that 's crazy
why would i draw attention to myself like that
you like to play games do n't you peter
he says on the photo he 'll call tomorrow at eleven
why not come back then and listen for yourself
oh we 'll be back
you can bet on it
meaning it looks like his victims are chosen at random
no
what do you mean no
he says it 's a game
all games have a strategy
all you got ta do is look at the map
his victims are n't random
it only means that they appear to be random
there 's a connection we just have to find it
morpheus
what
not what -- who
morpheus
the greek god of dreams
look at the next line
her god has gone and left his home
are you crazy
let 's see how much he wants to play
what in the hell do you think you 're doing
slamming down the phone in the middle of the trace
you think you 're going to catch him on a trace
everything he does is planned out well in advance
the only way we 're going to get him is to rattle him -- make him slip up
you know i figure that 's pretty much how these girl 's feel just before they get it
you think i 'm right
i would n't know
that 's right
i guess only the killer would know that
how 'd you get in here
the door was open
no it was n't
of course it was
otherwise i 'd be breaking and entering
that 's a felony
what do you want
you ever do any hunting peter
no
i used to
with my old man
he taught me how to hunt and trap
trapping 's a lot harder than most people think
we used to go after raccoons mostly
they 'd get into our garbage our fields
when an animal ca n't live peacefully with those around it it has to be destroyed
but they 're crafty little devils
you see the trick is you can put your trap down but no raccoon is going come near it unless you lay down the scent
you ever smell raccoon scent
smells like shit but to a male raccoon it smells just like pussy
he 'll walk right up to that trap even though it do n't look nothing like a raccoon and stick his goddam head right in it
you know why
cause he ca n't help himself
the scent drives him
so if you want to catch a raccoon all you got ta do is figure out where he is -- lay down the scent -- and sooner or later he 'll walk right into the trap
what if he does n't bite
what if he 's an exceptionally bright raccoon
well then you just got ta find out where he is -- and once you 're sure where he is -- you shoot the fucker
you got it on the board
no i need the original note
there 's a photostat of the original on the wall
he 's not talking about himself
then what 's he talking about
if we knew that we 'd know the answer to the riddle would n't we
he 's telling us where he 's going to kill tonight and we ca n't see it
then let 's narrow it down
homesearchers
we 're interested in where you were from the time you left the auditorium until you got there
i was at the beach
you sure you were n't over on pine road
i 'm positive
you 're a lying bastard
fuck you
i 'm tired of your goddam accusations
if you want to arrest me go ahead
otherwise back off
it 's all a big game is n't it
a sick fuckin game
i do n't know if there 's two of you involved or what -- but we 're going to find out
last night you gave us just enough to send us to the wrong place
it must 've shocked the hell out to you when frank walked in on pine road and you could n't finish
yes you are
get off me
you want me to what
i want you to feed every street in this grid into your computer
it 'll take hours
you ca n't make me do this
you 're right i ca n't make you do it
besides you 're probably gon na be too busy with the franchise tax board anyway
what are you talking about
i got ta friend over there
he was telling me things are kind of slow
so i figured i 'd give him a call have him come down here and look through your records
you know give him something to do
what 's the first street
sorry to ruin your trip to the city but we got a real nut on our hands frank
run it down
debi rutlege
female
caucasian
twenty four
worked over at the four oaks hotel
local
no
she just moved here last month from portland
what do you think
he 's got an answer for everything but he does n't have an alibi
you think he 's dirty
i do n't know but i think you 're right
he 's lying
we would n't want someone 's death to interfere with your games
what was your relationship with her
take it easy
both of you
i 'm sorry this is just too convenient
no shit
could someone this disturbed give the appearance of being normal
sorry
anything
we 've checked
there 's no one with the last name of emma on the island
maybe he 's going to drug her
how is she
she 's unconscious but they think she 's going to make it
you alright
i 've seen a lot of things in my time on the job but nothing like this
yurilivich
i was with him the whole time until i got the call at the hotel
sanderson
i spoke to jeremy
he 's watching sanderson 's kid
sanderson went out after the match and has n't come back since
find him
i want to talk to him
what is it
it 's a voice modulator
ready for round two
i 've got a feeling we 're going to go the distance with him
let him sweat for a little while
you should be an actor frank
you looked like you were really mad
the veins popping out on your neck was a really nice touch
you were n't mad at him for picking up the phone
why does he call sanderson
he 's one of the best chess players in the world
who better to play a game with
sending yourself anonymous notes in the mail is one thing -- but who called him today
i do n't know
maybe there 's two of them
maybe he hired some wino to make the calls
maybe you 're reaching a bit
i think sanderson should be in on this
there 's a reason why the killer 's calling him
do n't fuck with us
where did you go
he was with me
remember eventually revenge is carefully
have you tired juxtaposing the words
oh c'mon
we 're not going to spend any more time on this crap are we
it does n't mean anything
it 's sanderson
it is n't him
frank you brought me in on this in the beginning because you wanted my opinion if he was capable of doing this
jesus you 're sleeping with the guy
you 've lost your perspective
you ca n't possibly be unbiased
we 'll find the evidence
you could n't find your dick in a wind storm
hello peter
who is this
someone who 's going to become an important part of your life
i want to play a game with you
i have n't got time for this
hello peter
just a second
hello
very amateurish peter
i 'm surprised you would use such an obvious tactic
i 'm not an idiot
do n't treat me as one
i 'll call you everyday
you get one minute whether you put me on hold or talk is up to you
are you ready to play
yes
why did you kill debi rutlege
to get your attention
did you know her
no only the path she chose to travel
and -- what path is that
we all have paths to follow
you hope yours will lead you to me
why did you write remember on the wall
that 's something you 'll have to figure out for yourself
really peter you ca n't expect me to answer such direct questions
why not
you do n't want to think and that 's why i 'll win
i 'm already two points ahead
what
i did another one last night
you might have saved her but you did n't want to play
where is she
you 'll find her
if you got something to say to me just come out and say it
i 'm sure there are other people who would be interested in what i have to say
then call them
just for that no hint today
why are you doing this
you must have some idea of the pain you 're causing people
pain
pain is just a state of mind
it 's something you learn to live with
i have
and you want these girls to feel your pain
please i do n't want to get into the psychological aspects of my actions
it would detract from the game
how
i could n't say it any better than huxley
huxley 's quote also says his play is always fair and just
so is mine within the framework of my rules
have you any idea what the message is
if it 's so important why do n't you just tell me
i could n't tell you that
it would ruin the game
not that you 're playing it very well
you like to brag do n't you
what
you heard me
why did you go out to the institute looking for her
what makes you think i was there
i could n't tell you that
it would ruin the game
the game 's almost over peter and you 're running out of time
it 's you who 's running out of time
you 're starting to make mistakes now
you 're wondering just how much i really know
just how close i 'm getting
well i 'm closer than you think pal -- and i 'm gon na nail your ass to the wall
very nice speech peter
did you rehearse that or was it impromptu
there 's an old wooden bench in the garden
next to it is a rock
you 'll find a message for you under it
let 's see if you 're as clever as you think you are
hello
last night was very exciting was n't it
have you figured out what i 'm doing
you 're playing the tarakoss opening
very good
you 're next move should have been e2- e3
i used a variation
you should have anticipated that
have you figured out the message
what word did you leave last night
the police have n't told you
they think that you and i are doing this together
yes
congratulations on your daring escape
you just missed me by a few seconds
it 's check peter
let me speak to my daughter
she 's in the other room
i just wanted you to know she was n't dead
yet
but it 's time for her to die now
please
wait
the game 's over
you lost
it 's me you want
not her
no
as usual you 're wrong
it is her i want
killing you would be easy
living with the consequences of losing will be much more of a defeat
that would n't be very sporting
remember huxley
his play is always fair and just
you 're groping
i have been fair
it 's my move now
i 'll give you anything you want
anything
please
do n't beg peter
she has to die
i ca n't win unless she dies
i was thinking about leaving the phone line open so you could hear her die -- but i 've decided it 's better if you do n't know exactly when i kill her
good bye peter
no
wait
i know where you are
very good
how did you know
the pipes
how 'd you know i would n't be in the same room with her
you told me
when you called you said she was in the other room
drop the knife
this is n't going to help david
you 're mother 's dead
you ca n't undo it
you do n't understand
yes i do
i found your file
i know what happened
they took away the game because of him
my father left and my mother
there was so much blood
it covered everything
i know but this is n't going to bring her back
do n't you see
i had to make it right
i ignored my mother 's crossing
i sat with them all
i held their hands
i stroked their hair
i was with them to the end
i took away the blood
i washed them
their crossing was peaceful
i think your mother knows that now
why do n't you put the knife down
put it down david
naw it 's all fixed
i also loaded up a program that 'll analyze your games three hundred percent faster
thanks
nope
nothing
set up some pieces on the big board
d2-d4
b1-c3
and c1-f4
it 's the number two variation of the tarakoss opening
david can you bring up the tournament records for the last ten years
mister sanderson they 'll be hundreds of thousands of games
now what
have computer search for anyone that 's used that opening against me
there ca n't be more than a handful
there 's three
the first is 1983
lionel baines
the boston
never mind
he died two years ago
1985
hans korshaud
he 's in his seventies and lives in holland
what is it
new york
1986
viktor yurilivich
computers
that 's how you got into homesearchers records
you can get into anything
but why
why
you still have n't figured it out have you
you think that i 've put you through an ordeal
my scars run so much deeper than yours
what scars
the scars on your chest
from where i stabbed you with my fountain pen
you might not have done it had you known
you 're damn right
i 'm a child psychologist and you send me into a room with someone who could be a murderer
would you mind keeping your voice down
i have guests
oh well we would n't want to disturb your guests would we
the police came to me for help
what could i do
you could have been honest with me for starters
we work together
i have to be able to trust you
i admit i handled it badly
sanderson was n't going to talk to me
but you 're young attractive--
--the same type as the girl who got killed
jesus alan the guy could be a psychopath
they asked who would be best suited for this and you--
do n't patronize me
you sent me into a potentially dangerous situation and did n't warn me
kathy please
you 're going to wear a hole in the carpet
i 'm just nervous
sorry
you 're safe
he would n't come here
he already did once
why did he
why did he what
come here
he was watching you
yeah -- that 's what we 've always thought -- but what if he was n't
what if i had nothing to do with the reason he came here
you 're losing me
you must be erica
uh huh
i 'm kathy
is your dad here
he went down to the lobby for a minute
he should be right back
would you like come in
so are you having a good time on the island
not really
it 's pretty boring
that 's only because you do n't know where to go
you like hiking
fishing
sailing
what do you like
boys
do you like my dad
of course
i know he really likes you
how do you know that
did he say something
no
but i can tell
a woman knows these things
okay
nice meeting you
nice meeting you
who told you that
mrs. lutz
she also told me that mr. lutz goes to a medium to try and contact great grandmasters in the spirit world
has he gotten through to any
no but he did contact a dead parcheesi champion from ohio
what is it dad
nothing
do n't you have something you want to say to david
thanks david
you ready
for what
you told me you 'd take me over to seattle today
i 'm sorry honey i ca n't
not today
but you promised
it is n't kathy
who 's kathy
whaddaya got nolan
not much
there 's no sign of a break in
i think she let him in
how long has she been dead
six eight hours tops
any sign of rape
not that i can see
we 'll know more once i get the lab reports back from seattle
there 's no blood
where 's the fuckin blood
bingo
anything
not much
i do n't think she was raped
there 's no bruising or any signs of trauma to the pelvic region -- and no trace of sperm which makes sense because she took a bath
what about prints
no prints
you mean no prints but hers
no frank
no prints
same as the others
yeah
how long she been dead
i 'd say at least eighteen hours
that means she was dead before we even finished figuring out the message
well
well what
i told you this was a stupid idea
you ca n't learn anything from someone in a few minutes
you did n't pick up any vibes from the guy
i 'm a psychologist frank
not a psychic
what 's this all about anyway
what did dr. fulton tell you
only that you wanted someone from the institute to talk to sanderson for some case you 're working on
what 'd he do
we 're not sure
what do you think he did
we think he could be a suspect in a murder investigation
i 'm busy right now
it 's important
i see you 're still having problems with your openings
and this jeremy--
--edmonds
i know
you lost to karpov in 82 did n't you
no
i told him to
i wanted to make sure there was someone on the other end
but we heard him
it could have been a tape
a prerecorded conversation between sanderson and himself
kathy
well the fact that he views this as a game suggests that he is trying to prove some sense of superiority -- and the way he murders confirms a need to be in complete control of his victim
what about the way he arranged the body
that would indicate he 's playing out a fantasy
power control killers usually fantasize about their actions long before they commit them
once they become a reality though they reach a sense of euphoria and need to repeat the act to sustain it
but in all the research i 've read on serial killers i 've never heard of one moving so fast
it 's as if the game is the catalyst for the murders -- not the other way around
anything else
yes
why disguise your voice if no one knows it
i was thinking the same thing
he must be local
it 's logical for him to assume that the police would be there but he recognized andy 's voice and called him by name
what about this
i would think it 's some type of clue as to where he 's going to kill next
before we go in i got ta tell you this is n't going to be pretty
i know that
i 've seen the photo 's
this ai n't no photo
you never know how you 're going to catch a suspect
peter 's right captain
he 's got to be forced into making a mistake
well i think you have to play to his ego
he thinks he 's superior
the more secure he feels the more chances he 'll take
what did he mean by huxley
maybe we should back up a minute and take a look at what we do have
all the girls that have been killed have been killed at night
they 're all the same type
all moved into their homes within the last three months -- and all of them found their homes through homesearchers
i thought that homesearchers was a dead end
it ca n't be a coincidence
the woman that owns it has a son
she says he 's been on vacation in montana for the last ten days
we 're trying to locate him
there 's also a cleaning service that comes in once a week
we 're checking that out too
he moves around a lot
why
each of those grids represents almost a square mile
that 's a big area to cover
as large as castles
yes
why not just say a building if he meant any general type of structure
what time did he get there
about a quarter to one
he 's right kathy
what are you saying
that i 'm seeing what i want to see
that i 'm protecting a murderer
what
did you see his face
no
he was wearing a mask
but i saw the cut on his wrist
it was peter
i ca n't arrest someone for having a cut on their wrist
do you have someone you can stay with tonight
i 've got a room at the institute i use when i stay late
okay
why do n't you go out there
we 'll check in with you later
if you can think of anything else give us a call
you know i hate to say i told you so but i warned her
coming home at all hours of the night
a young girl new to the city
this neighborhood ai n't what it used to be
excuse me
you said earlier that mary albert just moved in
how long ago was that
ten days ago
do you know how she found the apartment
through a rental agency
did n't you tell me that debi rutlege had just moved into her place also
i know you 're busy so i 'll get right to it
did you know her
only in passing
to say hello to
could you tell me where you were last night
here
i played gregory lutz
i know
you won two games against him and left the auditorium at eight forty five
where did you go after that
to my room and then i went for a walk
this is a printout from the hotel computer for all the messages logged to your room
here 's one at 9:04 pm
it says from debi
please call me at home
she called to give me my schedule for tomorrow
what 's interesting about it is you say you only knew her in passing
yet she says on her message for you to call her at home and she does n't leave a number
that would imply you already knew the number
i got it from the tournament directory
why did n't you tell us you were there earlier
i do n't know
i was afraid there 'd be hours of questions
i ca n't afford to miss a game
mister sanderson this is doctor sheppard
she 's a psychologist helping us out
we 've already met
have n't we
doctor
that 's it
we think he might be making a reference to drugs
miss emma is a street term used by junkies for morphine
could emma be the name of the girl he 's going to kill
another one
what word did he leave
is
did you tell him about the institute
as large as castles
you are still light as air one hundred men ca n't move me
it does n't make sense
he 's using the map as a chessboard
the sonofabitch is playing chess with me
how can he be playing chess with you
you 're not making any moves against him
maybe i already have
i still do n't see how he could be playing chess against you
there 's only enough grids on the map to be half a board
that 's all he needs
he 's making the moves
it 's an opening
i just ca n't remember the name
okay it 's a game
he 's starting it so he moves first
he 's white
e2-e4
it 's a commercial area
no one lives there
but he had to dump the body there to make the move
as large as castles you are still light as the air one hundred men ca n't move me
it 's posed as a question
what am i
a building
a building is n't as light as air
what 's large but as light as air and ca n't be moved
he 's not going to give us direct hints
he 's going to skirt around it
he uses castles
plural -- then says ca n't move me
singular
not ca n't move us
jeremy would have never killed himself
maybe he just got tired of covering for you
this is insane
ca n't you see what 's going on
the killer wants me out of the way
he 's setting me up
do n't you understand what i 'm telling you
that 's why he wants me out of the way
i understand that this is just another one of your games
look i 'll do anything you want
i 'll sign anything you want
just send a car out to the hotel
alright c'mon peter
we 're moving you to a cell
i signed the confession
what about the car
did you send the car
it 's over peter
let 's stop the games
i 'm not sending a car
you opened with the english
lutz wo n't use it
he opened his first game with it
he knows you 're aware of that
then i 'll transpose
on a variation yes -- but it must be a variation that is unique
i suppose you have something in mind
it 's a good play but risky
you do n't win by playing it safe peter
we got a problem
our computer went on the fritz again
david came up to fix it
is it serious
peter
i 've got be here for the police when they come
then i 've got to practise
in case you forgot i 'm in the middle of a match right now
you 're always in the middle of a match
i want to be the best i can
she went into town with mrs. lutz
did they get him
no
feel like practicing
yeah
just let me grab a shower
bainbridge books
hi sara
this is doctor sheppard
i was wondering if you could tell me if you have a book on chess called principals and tactics by anton berger
i can check and call you back
thank you
i 'm at 639 7393
we 'll call you back
bainbridge books
sara this is doctor sheppard
i called you earlier about a book
yes doctor sheppard
we called you back but you were n't home
we have the book
could you please do me a big favor
in the first chapter the author mentions his three rules of chess
could you look and tell me what they are
of course
yes here it is
why they 're all the same
what are they please
carefully
carefully
carefully
sorry
i thought it was empty
it 's alright
is this your first time here
yes
i love this hotel
i stay here every time i visit my parents
how come you do n't stay with them
because i love them but they drive me crazy
you know how parents are
no
i do n't
are you with the tournament
uh huh
are you one of the players
yes
i 've always wanted to learn how to play chess
i do n't have the patience for it
when did you start playing
when i was very young
it seems like such a complicated game
not really
you see your goal and you go after it
anything that gets in the way is an obstacle and must be destroyed
sounds very violent
chess is a reflection of life
life is violent
the strong win
the weak perish
--but you enjoy being the stronger one
you like the control
if you 're asking me if i 'm passionate about what i do the answer is yes
without passion nothing moves us
what 's your passion
that 's a very personal question
i see
this is going to be a very polite conversation
what shall we discuss
the weather
movies
are you disappointed that i wo n't answer you
i had just hoped there would be more substance to the conversation
i thought opening too quickly was a fatal mistake in chess
it is
do you always open quickly
are we talking about me or chess
you
each circumstance requires a different tactic
well i hope you remember that tomorrow when you play krikorian
they could n't break the riddle
did you think it was going to be easy
you think he was going to lay it out at your feet
we need your help
i offered my help this morning and sedman turned me down
but you 're the key
the one he wants to play the game with
i ca n't right now
i 've got a game
she could be dead after the game
she could be dead now
what if she is n't
where are your priorities
you have to think between someone 's life and a chess game
the girl he killed last night was only twenty one years old
he dumped her body behind a warehouse like a sack of garbage
you sure you do n't want to eat something
i do n't think i could
it 's going to be a long night
it could take hours before we know something
you should try to eat
you sound like my mother
it was n't intentional
does what 's going on bother you at all
or are you just wearing your game face
i think it 's interesting
another kind of game
in a way
this is n't a game
oh but it is
he 's killing a person everyday and challenging us to catch him
that 's a game
it has rules and objectives
how can you look at it so clinically
take your average cop
they deal with death everyday
if they let emotions get in the way it would cloud their judgement
that 's true -- but the emotion is still there
they just learn to control it
what about you
are n't there times when a young child is telling you a story so sad you just want to cry
of course
do you
let 's change the subject
okay
so tell me about yourself
are you married
i 'm just curious
i think it 's best if we do n't ask too many personal questions -- i want to keep things on a professional level
you mean like in the steam room
that 's not fair
are you going to tell me you did n't feel something in there
you 're projecting your own desires and reading more into what happened than what actually did
very good
spoken like a true psychologist
when confronted with the prospect of your own reality hide behind quotations
what is that masters and johnson
you have to win every point do n't you
i just wanted to know if you 're involved with anyone
let me ask you something
do your colleagues know if you 're involved or not
of course
why
because i work with them
no
you 're not
no -- i 'm not involved
and i plan on keeping it that way
can you go fifteen minutes without thinking about it
no
but i 'm open to distractions
i 'm sure you are
you know you 're not the easiest person in the world to get close to
you always want to talk about me
what about you
was n't i just talking about me
no
you were talking about chess
alright
what about me
i dunno
where 's erica mother
she died in a car accident
i 'm sorry
it 's alright
it was a long time ago
it must 've been very hard on erica
it was
and you
what
have you noticed that every time we start to talk about something serious you start to play games
i 'm not playing a game now
yes you are
you 're playing word games
what is this
i 'm just trying to get to know you peter
what
by attacking me
nobody could attack you
you set your life up like one of your chessboards
you 're impregnable -- but at the same time you 've become trapped behind your own defenses
you 're cut off from everyone around you
what are you talking about
you do n't even know me
does anyone
i just do n't want to fight with you
then show me who you are
this frightens me -- because i 'm starting to feel things i have n't felt in a long time
you 've got to face the things you feel
i thought you were the woman who did n't want to get involved
i said i did n't plan on getting involved
you can turn everything around so easily
this is not just another game is it
no
i 'm hungry
call room service
they 're not delivering
i 'm going to go pick up the pizza
i thought you said the line was busy
i tried again and got through
what 's wrong
nothing
then why are you backing up
peter you have to admit--
--admit what
that i was right about you in the steam room
that you 're willing to do anything to find out what you want
would you like me to leave so you can search the rest of the room
peter
how could you think that kathy
how could you even consider it
in a fierce magazine you 'll find a hint of my actions to come
why does he set this line apart
for emphasis
exactly
it 's the key
but what does he mean by a fierce magazine
violent
a fierce magazine
brutal
an angry magazine
a war magazine
a mercenary magazine
fierce
mad
what
where 's the note
he 's replaying the game i played against him move by move using these girls as the chess pieces
all the girls have been found in their homes except christie eastman who was found in back of a warehouse
why
because to follow the game he played he had to move to that grid
right
here
c-4
hi
can i come in
the other night -- i said some things that maybe i should n't have
i mean you have n't known me very long and i can see how you thought what you did
i 'm not looking for an apology peter
i was thinking that
maybe when this is all over we could
i want someone i can get close to
i do n't know if that 's possible with you
you really have n't seen my best side
peter
no listen
you have no idea of the kind of pressure i 'm under right now
that 's still no excuse
you treat everything like a game
i ca n't think any more unless it 's about you
i 'll be in the middle of a match and instead of thinking about my next move i think about how you look when you smile
remember how you said that i hide behind my chessboard
ever since my wife died i 've been
i 've been afraid of getting too close to someone again -- afraid of losing them
you 're wife died
you ca n't feel responsible for that
you do n't understand
then help me to understand
i want to understand
it 's not that easy
of course it is n't
it 's always difficult when someone you love dies
but you ca n't feel responsible because she had a car accident
but i do
why
because she killed herself
how did you know it was carefully
frank told me
no he did n't
you 're right
the killer told me
he did n't tell you either
this is n't going to be like the phone book is it
of course not
you 're going to be late for your match
are you going to come tonight
yeah
i 'll be there later
you beat him
i got lucky
there 's a girl in the hospital who is going to live because of you
you made a difference
it 's over now
i just wanted you to know in case you thought about it in the future
do we have a future
hello peter
you played an interesting game last night
even though sacrificing your queen at b-5 is the game i played against valsney in 82
i 'm glad it helped you
i 'm sure you are
no i want you to do good
that way when i beat you at the end i 'll look that much better
you 're getting sloppy yurilivich
you 're nervous
i 'm not nervous
well you should be because this time i 'm going to win
well then this time you 'll have to stay for the whole match wo n't you
i 'm sorry
i could n't help it
i do n't have to go through with it either
you do n't understand
i 'm just so u relieved</u>. i was u sure</u you 'd turn out to be short and fat and gimpy
oh
that
i know what you mean
i had nightmares all week
me too
last night was the worst
i dreamt you had one leg shorter than the other and walked like a penguin
mine was worse i dreamt you picked your nose in public
that 's worse
you 're really not bad looking
almost handsome
well you 're beautiful
you u might</u be handsome
i ca n't tell through all that grime
besides you reek of sweat and horses
if you 're going to marry a warrior you 'd best get used to it
i have no intention of getting used to it
there
now you look like someone i might want to marry
maybe you 'd better look around for another candidate
i do n't think my skin is tough enough to survive a lifetime of you and your brush
i do n't have to look around
i 've found the husband i want
you can kiss me now
thank you but i can wait
i ca n't
i lied
about what
i ca n't wait either
lyssa
lyssa
colwyn
have they harmed you
no
they watch me closely but they have n't harmed me
lyssa
where are they keeping you
in a great fortress in the mountains
wait
something 's happening
lyssa
colwyn
where is the fortress
i do n't know
it 's a maze of tunnels
i ca n't see out
i will find you
i will be with you
i know it
i love you lyssa i love you
colwyn
colwyn
i love you colwyn
colwyn
you must move away from the center
all the passages are guarded
will your power outward
i do n't know how
you have the power
u will it</u>.
lyssa
come quickly colwyn
i can see the eyes of the beast
in the arctic ice
that way
i can feel the cold
that 's a better one
yes
you 'll both wait
at least for five hours
the wedding is at three
it was a platonic kiss father
of course it was
they have lyssa
you ca n't reach her
through the door
quickly
you will go alone
i wo n't leave you here
you will do as i tell you
you will try to reach ynyr the old one
i must follow the slayers
they 've taken lyssa
you will not follow the slayers you will obey my command
you have no chance alone boy
you must try to break through to ynyr
he has great knowledge
only with his help can you save lyssa
the white castle has fallen
does the queen live
the new queen lives
turold 's son was to marry her
we were married
then she was taken by the slayers
you must help me
i have lived in this place like my fathers before me guarding the old knowledge
i knew when i had no son that the great war would come in my time and that i would be the one to pass on the old knowledge to a new king
come
this is not the first time the dark ones have attacked our world
they came once before a thousand years ago
a young king and queen with extraordinary powers were given to us then to lead the struggle
my fore father was their councilor as i will be yours
i have no extraordinary powers
your powers are greater than you know
have you ever seen one of these
in the old books
it 's called a glaive
there is nothing
reach out farther
call to her
lyssa
lyssa
you must break when the strain becomes too great or you will harm yourself
and you must concentrate your powers for when they are needed most
what did she answer
she was in a great fortress first in the mountains then in the jungle
how is that possible
it is the fortress of krull
i know it only from the stories of wars on other worlds
they did not use it on our world in the first great war for it costs them enormous power
this time they mean to conquer at all costs
the fortress moves
yes
each dawn it rises in a different land sometimes in the mountains sometimes in the jungle sometimes the desert sometimes the sea
never in the same place twice
then even if lyssa tells us where she is we 'll never be able to reach her for they will never allow the fortress to rise near us
no
they occupy the fortress but they can not control its movement
it is moved by fate
and sooner or later fate will place it near us
then we must be ready
five leagues from here is the eastern tower
i know the barons who hold it
good men and brave
they will help us
you have not slept in two days
nor will i till my bride is beside me
you choose these
yes
they will be more help than high born barons
they know when they 're going to die
everyone of his race is born knowing the day of his death
i ca n't reach her
what do you see
darkness
tunnels and corridors
wait
she ca n't see out
she ca n't tell us where the fortress is
yes they knew of your first contact so they drove her below
she was very faint
i was barely able to reach her
the deeper she goes the harder it is to contact her
once she is below the second level you will not be able to reach her at all
i will find her
i can not reach her
she is too deep
the curved tunnel we saw is part of the vortex the place of the beast
the first time when they attacked long ago was the beast here
no
then they were led by his underlings
but i knew he had come this time from the ferocity of their onslaught from their use of the fortress
they use up much of their strength to do these things
they are taking great risks
u why</u
i 'm not sure
but you suspect
you will know in good time
i will melt that gold and pour it down your throat old man
he sees betrayal everywhere
he will attack us so long as he is conscious
from here i must go alone
you will tell me her name and we will go together
you must never know her name
if more than one approaches she will certainly kill them
alone i may have a chance
he ran a great risk helping us today
if he opposes his fate his death will be terribly painful
let us wish him peace
they will hold lyssa in the center of the vortex the place of the beast where its power is greatest
no man can match it there
lyssa must try to move toward us
for as we enter the vortex and move closer
the beast will kill her
yes
to keep her from you
but now that we are inside the fortress you will be able to contact her
she must make a glaive
lyssa your bracelets
bend them straight and cross them
the spiral begins in the west
where the spiral begins
she 's on the other side of this wall
i can feel it
i chose the wrong passage
she can see the beast
use your sword
what use is my sword
i ca n't reach her
cut
u cut</u
you must move quickly
the beast will stop at nothing now
you 're coming with us
it is my fate to die in the fortress
no
you can not know that
i can
because i choose it
i forbid you
do not let the waters touch you
what will happen
they can be saddled
you have done it
i road them often in my youth
saddles
it is today
yes
it is today
each to his fate
each to his fate
i know the cruelty of such a fate
perhaps you think no man would return to me
i do n't think that
am i not worth returning to
yes
am i not beautiful enough to be loved
yes
even by you
yes
you too are lonely
i ache with it
let me comfort you
i can not take comfort when she has none
then give me comfort
sleep with me tonight
i can not betray my bride
one night is no betrayal
have pity on me
please i beg you do not refuse me
you do not know the price
i feel your pain but i can not betray her
you will not then
i can not
once is enough thank you
he saved our lives
your kingship
your lord high mightiness
when i called you a
a
whatever i called you i did n't realize that you were
were
i was hoping i might be your friend
my u friend</u>.
i have need of friends
no more my lord my friend
with ergo the magnificent by your side your enemies are dead men
not yet my friend
it 's your tomato that 's dying
u what</u
oh no
better it was me
there is n't another good tomato within a hundred leagues
try your tricks on me and i 'll turn myself back into a snake and bite you
you and i will guard the fire
what else is left for a man without friends
i do n't think you 'll grow careless
smart as well as quick
now what do you have to give us
fame
fame
thank you no
fame is the burial ground of contentment
eat it and go hungry count it and go broke seek it and grow mad
fame is what fools yearn for and wise men shun
fame is what you leave to your sons
how did you know i had sons
because you would not rob if you had no children to provide for
hah
you do n't know me boy
i know you
they stand at the edge of the grave and make jokes
do you know who i am sprout
i am torquil lord of the forest
my men follow no man but me and i follow no man at all
you will follow me
and in the few seconds before i dice you to crow food tell me why i am going to follow you
so your sons will speak of you to your grandsons and your grandsons to their grandsons
and where do you lead boy
to the place where death lives
it should be an interesting journey then
that i promise you
i compel no man to follow me on this journey
when did you last sleep boy
i 'm all right
forgive me
it 's childish to cry
those are not child 's tear
a child cries for himself a man cries for those he loves
well i 'm not impressed
i knew you would not be
that 's why i chose you
you 've eaten nothing
we must try to get horses
yes
it will double our range
i know at least a dozen ways to get horses
all cheap
these we 'll pay for
lad you have an unnatural desire to pay for things
it stunts the mind and shrivels the imagination
hand over your dinner
a flicker of talent
forgive me my friends
i saw terrible things
they do not exist except in the waters of the swamp where they will remain
go join them
what kind of friend do you think i am
the best
but my unhappiness is not made lighter by adding your 's to it
well it is true that if i received a royal command i could n't very well disobey it could i
go
i command you
yes my lord
we could reach it on fire mares
those beasts can not be saddled by mortal men
we must cover a hundred leagues before sunrise
at the gallop
you 're resourceful my lad
i tell you one year under my tutelage and i could make you the prince of thieves
subject to the king no doubt
naturally
nothing worse than lower class boors with upper class morals
would you settle for a boar
a u boar</u
those incompetent louts could n't catch a piglet much less a boar
you
me
may i eat with you tonight
tonight and every night my friend for this is the second time you 've saved my life
i am ergo the magnificent short in stature tall in power etcetera etcetera
i am quell
what is that awful looking place
the swamp of betrayal
be glad we do n't have to cross it
i 'm glad
i 'm very glad
where are you going
we 'll meet you at the inn
ca n't i come too
no
a venison pie as big as a house
a small house
and what do you think a small person lives in you one eyed fool
leaving me here to mope while you and the boy were arranging my assassination
quell
i can not go with you my friend
my heart stays here
and mine goes with you
bread is for peasants and wine makes me sneeze
got any gumdrops
no
sugarballs
no
what kind of a boy are you
boys always have candy
i have a cinnamon bar
you do
you can have half
if i could wish
for anything i 'd wish for a venison pie the size of a
mountain
no that 's too greedy
i 'd settle for one the size of a house
i 'd wish for a puppy
one puppy
why not wish for a hundred
i only want one
a foolish wish
and you quell
sir ergo
my honorable lord ergo
first you desert me and now you mock me
go back to your one eyed friend
what
now you poke me in the nose as well
i do n't think it 's working
not working
this nose
this nose works day and night
this nose has never loafed an hour in its life
this nose
what
impossible
this nose asleep while venison fills the air
where is it boy
tell me where it is and i forgive you everything
it 's right behind you
we meant only to please you
and do you think i 'm not going to eat myself to death this very night
huh
oh she was so beautiful and i was so u ugly</u>.
would you desert your friends
no no
i 'm with you boy
but also very young
six to one is no odds boy
get me down from here you louts or i 'll turn you all into pigs
put me down you lout
you had better manners as a pig
i am ergo the magnificent and i do not travel with thieves and robbers
what are you doing with my dear
stop
thieves
many villagers are hiding in the forest
they need food
and do you think i live on air
we have plenty of hares
food for crows
surely a sorcerer of the sauce pan can make rabbit taste like venison
i am being exploited
where are you going
i must take the old man to see some sick children
kegan will guard you
i ca n't hold the weight of both of you
hush
look at its beauty
look at its grace
look at its insides
no
not yet
let me hug it and kiss it a little
let me run my fingers over its lovely skin
let me climb to the top and sing to it
my spells always go wrong when i am observed
be gone
the forest is not safe these days
you 'd best travel with us
u me</u
travel with u you</u
i am ergo the magnificent
short in stature
tall in power
narrow of purpose
wide of vision
and i do not travel with peasants and beggars
goodbye
one with red eyes the other with one eye both trying to kill me
the one with red eyes was a dark one the other was a cyclops and it was not you he meant to kill
he was aiming a huge spear right at me
if that were so you 'd be dead now
he was aiming at the dark one for there is ancient hatred between them
once his race had two eyes like other men until his forefathers bargained with the dark ones they gave up one of their eyes in return for the power to see the future
but they were cheated for the only future they were permitted to see was the time of their own death
he did n't join them
they joined him
and who is u he</u that they should join u him</u
he is the king
well at least i 'm glad to see you have a sense of humor
that 's the first smile i 've seen on that gloomy face of your 's
is n't it
it is n't
oh no
oh dear
oh now i 've gone and done it
they 'll trample him to death
no
he will master the leader
i do not want your power
it is hideous
you know nothing of power you foolish girl
you think power is a mighty sword or a strong castle or the paltry magic of an emerald seer
power is none of these
i do not want your worlds or your slaves
then look
what news from our friends
barak is still strong in the north and tendo holds the high passes
but the great desert forts have fallen
freylag 's stronghold
it has been taken freylag and all his people slaughtered
it is only a few weeks and already half our strong places have fallen
the attacks are unceasing by night the dark ones by day those of our people who have sold themselves to them those traitors who are called the slayers
it is the way of all invaders
those they would conquer they divide buying allies with promises of land and power
we will hold
their power is not unlimited
lord rowan is one of lyssa 's godfathers
he will defend her in the ceremony
i wish that lord modred were here
he is a godfather of her own blood
modred has treated with the dark ones
for some the lure of power is stronger than the ties of blood
no matter
i had hoped to have the wedding next spring lord turold with all the nobles of the kingdom in attendance
but fate and this war have ordained otherwise
it is important to assure the succession
yes
i will tell you something you did not know turold
had it been my choice all those years ago i would have chosen you for my king
but my parents chose otherwise
i knew
you knew
you are a rude bumpkin
that i am my lady
a girl of some spirit your daughter
a match for your son i think
a fine match
they will have the life that you and i might have had
you were attacked in the forest
yes
we lost five
you were lucky
i lost thirty there
i tried to reach ynyr the old one
i led a hundred men to his place in granite needle but it was surrounded
the dark ones guard it by night and by day they call out the slayers
ynyr can not get out and no one can get in
how many did you lose
sixty at the needle another thirty in the forest
only ten of us made it back
we will have to try again
his knowledge is great
without it we can not hope to win
modred
impossible
he leads a group of slayers under the leopard banner
the dark ones will appose you with all their power
they will fail for during the day the power of the circle is greater than theirs
only at night can they pierce the circle
knowledge i would n't want
no
they are sad solitary creatures rarely seen
we 'll seek an emerald seer
they have great powers of vision
there 's an emerald circle a few leagues from here
we 'll find her
we can save half a day by crossing the stone lake
many have perished in that maze
no maze to me my fried
it is where we take refuge when they hunt us
the leader of the dark ones
yes
like you a king
a king of many worlds
all enslaved
i must go to the widow
perhaps she will help
the widow of the web
yes
that creature helps no one
and none who go there return
she has the power of vision
she has the power to kill
perhaps she will not kill me for i know her name
her name is death
she had another name once
few have survived it
fewer will survive them
each to his fate lad
each to his fate
wait for me at the inn
if i am not back by dawn you will know my fate and you must go on without me
look
yes they are weakening
it takes great power to maintain the fortress and they have expended much
kegan
it is too late
he has drunk
go now
quell was wise
he knew that a man can not ask more of his death than it help his friends
that is true
who speaks that name
ynyr
it is fifty years since i heard that name
it is fifty years since i spoke it to you
i was beautiful then
the most beautiful woman in the world
but you would not stay with me
could not
could not betray the girl to whom i was betrothed
she was not as beautiful
no she was not as beautiful
she bore you many children
we had no children
you had a son
you said nothing
you told me nothing
you had left me
i kept silent out of rage
where is he
my son
i killed him when he was born
this place is my punishment
do not try your trickery on me
it is no trickery
those are reflections
u this</u is my face
you see
yes
memory is no trick it is a power
the power to see
power you have given me
what can my power give you
knowledge
of what
the fortress of krull
when will it come near here
why must you know
there is a girl there
her name is lyssa
you lie
could i lie to you and still see your beauty
no
a young man seeks her
a young man about the age i was when i met you
tomorrow the fortress of krull will rise with the sun in the valley of reeds
but the knowledge is of no use to you
no man has ever escaped the web
and soon the creature will come for you even here
what 's that man 's name
why do you want to know
he forgot his money
my mother 's got a pub behind the corner and he forgot his money about 100$.
huh
i see but this is the fbi little girl and i ca n't let you in
but if you leave me his money i 'll give him it myself
give me his name i will mail him
ok
mister stansfield norman stansfield
... office 2702
yeah
how do you know it
... i heard he said
that 's all
thanks
yeah pal
and i did n't say anything i said i do n't know you
but do you know what did she say that stupid raphaella
no
she told them you wanted her things and that she was n't surprised police looked for you
can you believe it
asshole
but she wo n't miss anything that
you 'll see
good what are you going to do
do you come back
no
i ca n't
i got tired
i want to live my way
yeah
i was sure
come on tell me
i know him
no
come on shit tell me
is he beautiful
i ca n't believe it
yes i think
how she kids me
i ca n't believe it
and did he pass your threshold or not
... what
well
did you sleep with him or not
no
not yet
he 's very shy
and very sensitive
... good
but what 's special in him
... i do n't know
it 's true he touches me
i love him
... you moved too did n't you
yeah
huh
because of the slaughter at your same floor
... not at all
it 's better
you see it 's my turf so i do n't want contracts i 'm not informed about on my turf
i 'm not opposing but the least they can do is informing me is n't it
yes
at a certain moment i thought maybe leon would like working on his own
so he makes some little extras
dirty work and i kill no women and no kids
that 's what i later told myself
no tony forget leon
it ca n't be him he likes too much his job to make such a slaughter
tell me
the money i earn and you keep for me
do you need money
no
just to know
because it 's a long time i work
and i never did anything with my money
i should do something
take
well i do n't need them
take them you never know
if you want to have some fun
take it 's a gift
ok i 'm fine
good
here this is the light scoop for night shooting
there you fix client 's distance
how much to the bench down there in the park
huh
500 meters
130
140
how can you say it
look
when you can see his fingers it 's 50 meters
when you just see his hands it 's about 80 meters
when you distinguish arms from body it 's 120 130
when you see nothing more than a shape you do n't shoot
not very sure
you have one chance out of five to miss
a contract means getting all chances on your side
5 out of 5
you ca n't miss a client
never
if the task is delicate or the risk is too big you double
that is you insure yourself by another means
what for example
well if the guy is far in a car and i know weather is going to be bad rain for example i think i would plastic the car with a remote here
i shoot from the distance and if i miss i plastic
what if you ca n't approach the car or he changes car
rocket launcher
oh really
but can you miss the car
wow
it 's brilliant
yeah
come on have a little training
who 'll i aim at
whoever
the fat man down there on the bench
perfect
good
first shot
yeah but i did n't get him i got his case and now he 's behind the tree
what can i do
it 's not serious it 's just training
you have to learn from the beginning to hit the target then to improve precision you 'll train but on cardboards
ok
now try a running guy
it 's incredible
how did you do it
what
there the guy
how did you do that without even touching him
without noise
it 's like you put him away
how did you do it
five minutes
keep in front of the window
ok
come on get down
you were scared were n't you
i was nervous that 's all
where is the guy
i killed him
and cut him and ate all of him
i left nothing for you
it 's strange being in love
it 's the first time for me
how do you know it 's love if you 've never been in love before
it may be friendship
or the love you can have with a brother or a father
how can you know
... because i feel it
mathilda
may i come in
yes
why do n't you take me with you
i 'm ready now
you said i learn very quickly
quick does n't mean ready
and you ca n't discuss we said
right
may i go to the cinema
no
for musicals
that 's part of the job
no you ca n't go out
you see five minutes ago you said you loved me and now you hate me
but i prefer this
i hate you because you depart without kissing me
that 's all
well
then may you rent me your gear for the day
i never rent my gear
if you knew leon
i killed one thousand in my head
and this never disturbed my sleep
ok
and if it 's you who gets killed
then
talking about other people 's death is easy but what about yours
she 's here
she moves around you and can get you in a thousandth of second
because it was your day your hour your second
it 's true
but a first contract it 's an exception
and
may i kiss you like in the movies may this be an exception
... i 'm going to kiss you
mathilda stop please
stop
everyone is looking
of course so kiss me quickly or they 'll notice us
... you do n't believe me do n't you
what
when i say i love you
mathilda do n't resume please
change subject ok
... ok
i love you anyway
mathilda
ok ok
excuse me
how old were you when you had your first contract
... 17
... shit
we 'd found him
we waited for him to get upstairs and he got out of the window
what shall we do
i think
where are you going
piddle
she smiles and looks for the bathroom
she finds it and is going to go in when she sees the head of a man in the bath walkman on
she withholds a shout and gets against the wall without moving
she does n't dare passing before the open door again to join leon
in the living room leon still thinks
... why did n't he close the window
... i prefer apartments
furthermore there are always kids in a building
what about getting some friends
friends
you 're crazy
in my building before they just cared drugs all day and you could n't get one or they just cared video games and you could n't get one no more
you 're darkening the picture are n't you
a little
is there a normal 13 or 14 year old boy
yeah
there 's a lot on tv
it 's too big
yeah
i 'm just good for left overs
risky business is n't it
... you 're young mathilda
you still have a chance to get out
you ca n't give up this chance
you have to protect it
there 's a lot of things to do in life a lot of other jobs
there are just two things i 'm interested in love and death
for the moment i have none of the two
mathilda
there 's equally a lot of other things
huh really
what
come on i 'm waiting
no excuse me
it 's the yogurt that made me laugh
you 've just to love me and i 'll be the happiest woman around
yeah i know
but for the moment you 're not yet a woman
so be patient
i need time
and you too
you have to grow up
i do n't grow up any more
i just get older
i 'm here i 'll never leave you again mathilda never
i swear
i love you so much leon
i love you too and i do n't want to lose you
poor darling and then
well
i proposed them to play roulette
like we played
and i lost
well
i do n't know suddenly the make up
all this
how are you
are you ok
of course
i 'm fine
i put on your beautiful dress i slightly made up
i tried to get beautiful
do n't you like it
how many girlfriends did you have
... i do n't know
well
1
2
10
100
1000
how many approximately
... mathilda i do n't feel like talking about this
why
did you have too many and you fear it may shock me
i wo n't get shocked
i 'm used to this
my father was a true pig
he fucked the bitch i 'd as mother all around the apartment
whenever a door was closed you could be sure they were making sex behind it
and my sister if you did n't sleep with her you 're building 's exception
stop mathilda
do n't talk like that
... i had a girlfriend
a long time ago
before coming here in my country
i was 14-year old
we flirted like kids
her father did n't want her to meet me
my family was not very respectable
then
you did n't give a shit about her father did n't you
you met anyway
... that 's awful
i hope you killed that asshole
... yes
the day he got out of jail
i allowed him to make ten steps
no more
and bang
two hundred meters
by telescope
that night i left my country and came here to join my father who worked for tony
i was 17
then i never left the city
and never had another girlfriend
you
you knock the code when you come back ok
yes
three times then two times
may i ask you a personal question
... yes
what do you do with the money you earn
nothing for the moment
maybe it 's the time to do something is n't it
yeah what
i do n't know
getting far away the two of us for example
and forgetting all this
why did you unleash the pipe i do n't know
it will take them five minutes
how long ago did they arrive
i do n't know
five minutes
good
snipers ca n't be in position
how shall we get out now leon
let me work
we 'll get out i tell you
no
i do n't want to leave you
mathilda listen
no no
i do n't want to go
i do n't want
... yes
excuse me mister
i 'm looking for mister rubens apartment but it 's dark out here and i got lost
... one second
do n't fear
i have no fear
how are you miss
fine
i 'm sick with practicing that 's it
i see
you 're good because i did n't hear anything
yeah
i put a rag on the strings to lessen noise
huh
that 's smart
i 'm used to it
not everyone likes music
yeah true
but what does your father exactly do for living
... composer
huh that 's good
yeah but he 's not exactly my father
huh
... no
he 's my lover
you ca n't sit here like that
huh
why
because you have to pay
it 's like a parking meter if you stay you pay
it 's the rule
... and how much is it
ten dollars
a month
... ok
good
can i sit on the stairways now
huh
yeah yeah
of course
rinaldi
rinaldi
what region do you come from
messina
emilio
due grappe
why the hell did you come here
but
he works for your same employer
yeah but i do n't give a shit about
i trade at left at right and that 's dangerous in there
it 's a little out of the world coming to visit me this way on mid afternoon
it really is n't the usual procedure
i know
but i 'm a little pressed
have you ever been in messina son
yes
twice
did you fish in messina
the pesce spada
no
it 's a specialty down there
it 's a fishing boat with in front a long pole near the surface
then near the cabin a very tall mast with a little cabin for the lookout
i think i will get back in messina this summer
it 's too long i have n't been there
you 're right son
you must care the links with your family always
it 's the only important thing in the world
... yeah
salute
salute
you 'd better talk good son because for the moment i 've got a quite bad opinion about you
norman smiles
i respect your business mister tony
every time we asked your help we were very happy with the result
it 's right this that makes me nervous now
i hope you 'll excuse my temporary bad mood
then
do you recognize him
... even his mother would n't
listen son you know as well as me this kind of hitmen they come from nowhere get the contract and disappear
they 're lonely worse than wolves
may we have this wolf 's name and address
these guys have no place
they change virtually everyday
and his name
it 's a surname
he probably just went somewhere
where
for a walk
i do n't know
what is it
adelle
maurice is in the paper
and your store
what about your new store
what about all your dreams
i have new dreams now
i do n't accept that
maybe one day -- after you 've been married twenty years you 'll understand
uncle maurice -- i spent all our frequent flyer miles on a one way ticket here
i have a rented car outside just listen to me
come back with me now and if you still want to do something like this in a year -- maybe we 'll plan a car trip across the country -- gerald and i will come along --
i have to walk -- by myself -- all the way -- every inch
it 's impossible
it 's what she asked for
it 's what i 'm going to do
she was being symbolic
what if she asked you to fly to the moon
you 'd be visiting me at nasa
what if you do n't make it
i 'll make it
if you really want to do this
plan it out
rest up
train for it
build up your body
plan every stop along the way
how much money
time
really do it properly
this is all so -- by the seat of your pants
no it 's not
why did you take the back roads here
they 're not safe
you 'd know that if you 'd planned
i 've all ready gone six hundred miles
i ca n't do it again
if you ca n't redo these six hundred miles when you 're rested and ready how are you possible going to walk another two thousand five hundred miles in your present condition
nothing 's going to happen
uncle the way i was told if that police car did n't happen down that road you would be dead right now
that guy denny had jumped bail in another state he 's dangerous
they 'll be other dennys if you do n't plan
are you two planning kids
maybe later
you should definitely have children
they 're really special
i do n't think you realize how serious this is uncle
how serious is it
then it 'll have to wait until i finish
what
i finish the walk and then we may take all the chances we want
listen to me very carefully because i do n't want you to misunderstand me
the walk is over uncle maurice
done
finished
you 've made it to california it was a miracle now let 's try to save your life
i 'm completing the walk
i 'm almost there
look i 'll see if anyone has spotted him recently
if i get any information i 'll call you
thank you
do n't wait by the phone
if he 's really been walking this whole time he 's out of our jurisdiction
mine
are you and your friends planning on driving soon
are you a preacher
no i just do n't want anybody dying because i did n't say something when i had the chance
this is indiana -- nothing 's going to happen to you
you need a ride preacher
a wife
did someone piss drunk run into your wife
crushed her like a bug
snapped her bones
that 's enough
oh the preacher 's getting angry again
tell me something
did she die instantly or did she feel every torn muscle and shattered bone
were you there to help her
or were you safe at home when the windshield sliced into her face --
i 'll kill you
the normal amount of build up in your arteries has been aggravated by over exertion
this is called claudication as a result there is n't enough circulation to your body
that accounts for the discoloration in your extremities and the muscle spasms i 'm sure you 've encountered
can it kill me
it can but it 'll have to wait in line
what steps do we take now
we operate
we find the artery in the brain and close the bleeding
i just did this procedure on a senator and he 's doing fine
what are the odds
do i have a fifty fifty chance of surviving the operation
it 's hard to say
it 's a delicate surgery
there 's no getting around the fact that it 's a very high risk situation
just for curiosity sake that 's all
i do n't know -- maybe twenty miles
of course i 'm not recommending that
if someone like you had to i mean
that 's how far they 'd probably get before encountering serious physical walls
twenty miles
i see
yes
the flowers
they 're beautiful
you thought i sent them
there was no card
have i forgotten something
is this a special day
it 's just a regular day
it 's a special day is n't it
well i 'm sure it 's not christmas because you 'd be worried about how much money we do n't have to spend on each other
i know it 's not new years because you 'd be going on and on about wearing a tuxedo and how much you do n't like to dance
and i 'm sure it 's not our anniversary because i did n't find an envelope with a hundred dollars cash on my bureau with a note that says pick out something pretty
yes -- maurice -- i 'm virtually certain it 's not a special day today
ellen
what
the new store
honey i told you
if it makes you happy we should just do it
it 's a tremendous amount of work -- moving
we can do it together
... love is shown through actions not just words
what 's that
that 's not a fortune
you will be rich
that 's a fortune
what you have is a statement
what it is -- is the truth
i do n't follow
is this going to be similar to the flower incident
sometimes people need to see things done for them -- because sooner or later they do n't believe the words anymore
you do n't think i love you
a book society award is a very prestigious thing
why are you polishing it -- in bed -- in your pajamas -- at 11:15 at night
are you going to show it to someone
no
then why
there 's no reason
exactly
no reason
no occasion
it just makes you feel good to do something for it to express your pride and affection for it some how
how come you 'd do that for a piece of metal and not for me
i do love you
very very much
show me
i will -- i promise
walk with me
you like to take walks
no
but i want to take a walk with you
it 's one of those thoughts you keep to yourself
please tell me
i thought we both wanted the same things
i 've changed my mind
you ca n't change your mind
i want children
you 've just decided is that right
yes
ellen there are two kinds of people in the world --
please not the two kinds of people speech
... people that were made to be parents and people who were not made to be parents
my parents were people who were not made to be parents but had kids anyway
i do n't want us to be that way ellen
you can change
face it ellen i 'm not the type of person who reads bedtime stories
but you love me anyway
do n't be so sure
it must 've hit the window
i think its neck is broken
do n't bring it in here -- it probably has all kinds of diseases
i do n't know
i think it 's a different place for each person
did you have a dream
i know where my heaven is
where
pacifica california
why there
when i was ten my family lived in pacifica for a year
i used to go to the beach everyday that summer
i never felt so happy carefree
it was a magic place for me
that 's where my heaven will be
maurice
yes
if i die you 'll know where to look for me
go to sleep ellen
no really if god takes us away from each other you know where to look now
the beach of pacifica california
good
what did they ask
if i had seen you
by the way i 'm sorry about your wife
they told me
thank you
i 'm sorry you had to lie
it must have been difficult
i asked the officers if you had committed some crime
if they had said yes you would be speaking with them right now
to where
pacifica california
from where
philadelphia pennsylvania
i see
why
do you believe a person 's soul lives on after their death
most certainly
and that that soul takes part of the person they were on this earth with them
that 's a reasonable assumption
i do n't want my wife 's soul having any doubts
doubts
about what
about my love for her
red flags man
not our problem
why so vague
why so evasive
he could be somebody hot
not our problem
it 's going to look beautiful when he turns out to be that animal who paid a visit to the steadman 's house
this guy 's not a murderer
if he is half the town has seen us take him out for dinner like a couple of jack asses
a marriage certificate
who the hell carries their marriage certificate around
maurice and ellen parker
it was issued in philly
mr. maurice parker has come a long way from home
why
hansen 's whipped
has to call his wife every two hours or she 'll go ballistic when he gets home
p a r k e r. right
get on the horn with philly
call me here
i 'm going to drop off tandy at the station and then drop you back
that 's all right is n't it
shit
he jumped
jumped where
out of the car
he jumped out of the god damn car
well hello
i 'm isaac
i 'm three
i 'm maurice parker
i 'm much older than three
are your parents home
you know what i can play baseball with my brothers when i 'm bigger
is that right
you know what
i 'm just little now but i 'll be big soon
you 'll probably be bigger than your brothers
yeah
i thought you were asleep
you know what
i remembered you were here and i woke up
anyway big billy needed another player so he yelled into the stands
who can play baseball
and there was a little voice that yelled out me i can play
everyone turned to see a little boy standing with a glove
that 's me
right
but everyone saw how small isaac was and laughed
but not big billy
he stared at isaac carefully and then told him to join the game
it came to the end of the game
it was the eleventh or twelfth inning or whatever is the last inning of a game
nine
okay nine
big billy 's team was losing and he was on base
that 's when isaac came up
he could barely hold the bat
big billy winked at isaac
the ball was pitched -- isaac hit the ball hard
it soared up and out over the stadium
everyone cheered
isaac hit a home run and won the game
after the game isaac asked big billy why he let he play
big billy smiled and said i was n't always big billy i was little billy first
isaac and big billy went off after the game and read a classic book together
the end
you know what -- that was a really good story
tell it again
each inch represents 150 miles
making the grand total
damn baby relax
i 'm getting to it
from philadelphia following the route highlighted to pacifica california -- you 're traveling an estimated three thousand two hundred miles
three thousand miles
how many times does twenty go into three thousand
what was that
perhaps there 's another route
this is the route approved by triple a. even if you followed back roads the entire way you 'd still be looking at roughly the same distance
do n't worry baby it should n't take you more than five days if you just stop to sleep and eat
by car right
this story is big huh
mammoth
the gazette 's small huh
what are you saying
this story is too big for this paper
umm no
it 's just that --
god damn you 're right
you do n't say much michelle but what you say is golden
michelle breathe
that 's it what is it talk to me
umm coalville utah
umm he 's going to make it is n't he
maybe
i want to reach people
nobody listens to me
this is my way to reach them
to reach people you have to feel something first
you write about the wrong things
how can you feel for dog food
the people at the gazette do n't respect it and neither do you
this is a ghost town
nothing ever happens
write from your heart
that 's why the classics are great
are you firing me
no
no
i wo n't be here for a while
the store will be closed in the interim
you going on a trip mr. parker
yes
where
california
when are you leaving
tomorrow
i 'm walking there kris
walking where
california
the hairs on my arm are standing up
something strange is happening
i always knew you had good instincts
goodbye kris
i 'll see you when i get back
phileas fogg
... round the world in eighty days
hello kris
you 're amazing
what are you doing mr. parker
i told you
you 're walking to california
pacifica california -- it 's a coastal city
oh a coastal city
that 's good
i need to show her how much i love her kris
why know
because i should have shown her before
everyday i should have shown her
pacifica california
that 's a long ways away
so i 've been informed
ellen got up every morning and went to the corner store to get me my bread for breakfast
everyday
now that 's about a quarter mile each way
17 years
that comes to about three thousand miles
and you know what kris
what mr. parker
she never ate a slice
tom joad
... the grapes of wrath
you 're amazing
i missed you kris
i missed you to mr. parker
adelle told me your writing is going well
the crusader for social issues and all
you were right
from the heart is always better
i have n't been too punctual with the rent
i was thinking you could open another store with investors
i 'm sure a lot of people would want to get involved with you now
are they standing
saluting
come on mr. parker
what come on
i ca n't do it
i want you to finish but i want you to live more
she knows you love her mr. parker
she knows now
no more words
until i touch the ocean with my hands
it 's all just words
there are a lot of people worried about you
where am i
in a hospital
which hospital
did you take me back
what do your friends call you
steph
do you have a car steph
you 're in pain
i need your help
they told me you might try to talk me into something
you need to rest mr. parker
it 's for your own good
i 've been following your story for a long while
it 's a beautiful thing you did
you ever lose somebody stephanie
mr. parker i 'm supposed to give you your fish sticks
... my father
did you tell him everything you wanted to
did you do everything you could while he was here
you 're going to have a lot of work to do when i get back
someone should be with you
good morning
good morning
is it a boy or a girl
oh that 's not mine
where did he go
he 's getting my sweater from the car
i said there was a breeze
i told him not to go
may i ask you a question that might sound strange
yes
hello mr. parker
hello
how are you feeling
confused
i 'm not sure what to do now
i 'm not sure what he wants for me
he wants to reward you
that 's why i 'm here
what do you mean
i mean you 've done a great thing
you should be rewarded monetarily
what 's your shoe size
what
who are you
if that ai n't fate
hi i 'm dave caldwell
i do the copy for the anchor on the evening news down here
evening news
we did a piece after your story ran in the new york times
i 've always wanted a watch like that
it 's yours
no
i wo n't take it unless i pay for it
let 's see that 's a pretty nice watch -- i can see that
i really want that watch
this is n't right
this is my only chance to get a watch like that
it would mean a lot to me and my family
please take it
it really is n't that much
there 's a one drink minimum per show i hope you saw the sign when you came in
anyway they 're supposed to tell you
yes i heard and it 's not a problem
what do you want
what are my choices
everything 's ten dollars and there 's no alcohol
no alcohol
no alcohol
you got ta get something else
everything 's ten dollars
what do you want
what do you think i should get
non alcoholic malt beverage
... noooo
orange soda
no
coffee
no
sparkling apple cider
no
water
water
one drink minimum per show
everything 's ten dollars
now
tell me what you want or i 'll eighty- six you
water
that is if you 'll come to my room for an hour i will give you five hundred dollars
maybe you should n't stand in the road like that
you 're pretty drunk
you 're pretty drunk
not really
my room 's not far
the whole year inn
you can drive with me if you want
sarah -- with an h
no -- s.e.r.a.
i 'm sort of curious
if you 're willing to pay me two fifty
not that i mind
i mean i 'm ok with that -- why are n't you staying in a hotel
we can go to one if you 'd prefer
no this is fine
i was just wondering
umm
we can stay in the car for an hour if you want
but i really have to go then
it 's your time
right i 'll get your door
i tend to fade in and out lately
i guess i do too
you what
i sometimes fade out
oh
well maybe we better synchronize our spells
or stagger them
you were going to get my door
mind if i use the bathroom
of course
want a drink
i 'm having one
a shot of tequila if you can spare it
of course
do you want to fuck now
maybe another drink first
more tequila
ok
whatever
i cashed in all of my money paid my amex card gon na sell the car tomorrow
how long 's it gon na take for you to drink yourself to death
i think about four weeks and i 've got enough for about two hundred and fifty to three hundred dollars a day
yes
that should do it
what am i
a luxury
yeah
and your meter just ran out
if i was i 'm sorry
no just drunk
but that 's ok
where 's your car
i sold it this morning
i 'm going to take cabs from now on in
do n't run away
why should i
i know you 're not a cop so what is it tonight
another two fifty to watch you sleep
what 's up
i was looking for you tonight
i do n't know if you have a boyfriend
... or a girlfriend but if you have some free time
maybe we could have dinner
are you serious
i think you know i 'm serious
i 'll pay you if you like
but i 'd like to see you
no i ca n't have dinner with you
yes
i have to change and take a shower first
if you want to come home and wait
we should pick up a bottle of tequila on the way
i owe you one
you do
this is the home of an angel
you ok out there
yes
take your time
i 'm fine
i 'm from the east
i went to college did an arts course
i now live in vegas
i think of it as home
i came here deliberately to carve out a life
i was in la before but i 'll come back to that later
the tough times are behind me now
i can deal with the bad things that happen
there will always be dark characters
but my life is good
it is as i would want it to be
so why are you a drunk
is that really what you want to ask me
yes
well then i guess this is our first date
or our last
until now i was n't sure it was either
very clever
first
it 's our first
i 'm just concerned
so
why are you killing yourself
interesting choice of words
i do n't remember
i just know that i want to
want to kill yourself
are you saying that you 're drinking as a way to kill yourself
it was n't so important to me
i mean he never asked me why i was a hooker and that was impressive
i really liked him
so i decided to just play my part
i mean
it 's good to help someone once in a while it 's a bonus to being alive and that was my plan
to stay alive
i suddenly came to a decision
what are you thinking
are you angry with me
ben why do n't you stay at my place tonight
i mean
look you 're so drunk
i like you
i trust you
that 's astonishing
sera look
i hate to think of you in that cheesy motel
i mean
let 's face it what the fuck are you doing in las vegas
i 'm going to move to a smart hotel tomorrow if it 'll make you feel better
let 's talk about tomorrow
wanna do something
sure
tonight
then please stay at my place
sera
you know i 'm not much good in the sack
it 's not about sex ben
i 'll make you up a bed on the sofa
do it for me
we can talk till late and then sleep till late
as you know i am my own boss
how long have i been here
three nights two days
when is your rent coming up at the motel
i do n't know
i 'll go and sort it out today
why do n't you come
we 'll find a real room for me
you can pick it out a tower on the strip
there 's no reason to blow all your money on a hotel room
what do you mean
what i mean is that you should bring your stuff over here
we 're spending all this time together
what the fuck
sera
let 's face it ben we 're having fun here
i 've never done so much talking in my life
me neither
so
let 's dispense with the formalities
i want you here
now
sera you are crazy
so
i 'm not too concerned with long term plans
do n't you think you 'll get a little bored living with a drunk
that is what i want
why do n't you go and get your stuff
you have n't seen the worst of it
these last few days i 've been very controlled
i knock things over
i throw up all the time
now i feel really good
you 're like some kind of antidote that mixes the liquor and keeps me in balance but that wo n't last forever
you 'll get tired of it really quickly
believe me
do n't you like me ben
do n't be silly
sera
what you do n't understand is
what
you can never
never
ask me to stop drinking
do you understand
i do
i really do
ok
i have to do some shopping alone
you go out for a few drinks and then pick up your things
do n't hurry and i 'll be back before you to let you in
ben
sorry
sera i love that name
s.e.r.a. before we proceed onwards there is something i need to say
ok
ok
i 've come this far
here i am in your house
i want you to let me pay the rent for this month
all right
why
because
it 's better for me that way
ok
well
ok
sera
i hope that you understand how i feel about this
first of all you 're welcome to my money
we can buy a couple of cases of liquor and you can have the rest
but i do n't think you 're talking to me right now about money
no
no
i think you 're talking about you
i 'll tell you right now that i 'm in love with you
but be that as it may i 'm not here to force my twisted life into your soul
i know that
... and i 'm not here to demand your attention to the point where it changes your life
we know i 'm a drunk
but that seems to be all right with you
and i know that you 're a hooker
i hope you understand that i 'm a person who is totally at ease with this
which is not to say that i 'm indifferent or that i do n't care
i do
it simply means that i trust and accept your judgement
what i 'm saying is
that i hope you understand that i understand
thanks i do understand
i was worried about how that would be
but now i 'm not
and you should know that included with the rent here is a complimentary blow job
ah yes
i suppose sooner or later we ought to fuck
whatever that means
open your presents
right
the suitcase was clinking
so what did you do with your clothes
i threw them into the garbage which was perhaps immoral but i wanted to come to you clean so to speak
i thought we could go shopping and pick up a pair of jeans and forty- five pairs of underwear and just throw them out each day
nice talk ben
keep drinking
in between the hundred and one proof breath and the occasional drool some interesting words fall from your mouth
i 'm going to fill it right now
do you want to go gambling tonight
we could go out and play for a few hours
giving you money makes me want to come
then come
i 'm going to change
watch tv
i 'll be half an hour
i am planning to go out and do some work
when
tomorrow night as a matter of fact
you were ok for a while so we walked for about a block and then you said you wanted to go home and fuck but i think even you knew that was n't going to happen
we got a cab and you asked him to stop at a liquor store even though i told you that we had plenty at home
in the store you gave the kid a hundred and told him to keep the change
i asked you if you knew it was a hundred
you said you did so i let you do it
we got here you fell asleep on the couch and i covered you up and came to bed
i warned you
but i 'm sorry
here 's my speech
i know this should n't be acceptable to me but it is
do n't ask me why
i sense that your trouble is very big
and i 'm scared for you
and so i 'm doing what i think you need me to do
falling down in casinos is little stuff
it does n't bother me
it has nothing to do with us
that 's amazing
what are you
some sort of angel visiting me from one of my drunk fantasies
how can you be so good
why do n't you go back to sleep
i 'll go out and buy us some breakfast
be careful
very creative
now we can get you a black bow tie and you can look like one of those casino dealers
ok but remember that they wear it because they have to
i wear it because i want to
that 'll make me look different
let 's get a drink
your color
i think you should wear one at a time
one of these
and one of your others
in fact i was going to buy just one but i did n't think it would fly
as a gift i mean
what was that all about
can we just forget it
i do n't understand any of that
can we just ignore it
please
yes
i 'll give you that
thank you sera
do you want me not to go tonight
no
we already talked about that
maybe i should follow you around and ask one of your tricks what it 's like to sleep with you
they would n't know
i 'll be back home around three
if you 're back by then we can watch tv or something
i guess what i 'm saying is
that i hope you are back when i get home
please be careful
you be careful to
i 'm going to miss you
shall we go away for a couple of days
yeah
i 'd like that
i 've missed the best sun
why did you have to pawn your watch
i did n't know i 'd ever need it again
maybe it 's time i moved to a hotel
and do what
rot away in a room
we 're not going to talk about that
fuck you
i will not talk about that
you 're staying here
you are not moving to a hotel
will you lighten up please
one thing
one thing
this is one thing you can do for me
i 've given you gallons of free will here
you can do this for me
there are limits
yes
i guess i knew that
i wanted to see you
oh ben
you look so very sick
my love
you 're so pale
you know i love you
yeah
yes
hey brad
how 's it going
hey ben
there were a couple of guys looking for you
what did they look like
suits
i did n't tell them anything
you know anything about gears
how 'd this happen
i was going real fast down on the beach and something slipped and everything got jammed up
the news is not good kid
this bit here
see there
it 's broken
you need a new one
how much do you think
i do n't know
i 'll find out though
about ready for another drink
yes that would be great
are you her for the convention
do i look that obvious
my name 's paul
i do n't want this
yuri please
i really do n't want this
you know i do n't like to do groups
i want this sera
i need this
please yuri
you have been lonely
i 've been all right
i will keep you safe
we are both older
you have been lonely
i am lonely yuri
i 'm pleased with you sera
how you have moved up in the world
i showed you a glamorous world when i took you off the streets
and how you repay me
where have you been staying
with an old friend
it is after all sera my money
yes of course
how much do you need
all of it
i need to buy many things
all of it
where have you been
it was a slow night
i went to a hotel for a few drinks
a full night on the street and this is all
like i said
it was a slow night
i 'm sorry
it was hard to score
do n't hit me
what do you think
you are sixteen years old on hollywood boulevard
go sera
go
stay at home
i will call you tomorrow
yuri
are you
sera
please go
harvard law school
that 's right
but it 's a top three school --
i have a 4.0
yes but your major is fashion merchandising
harvard wo n't be impressed that you aced history of lycra
what are your backups
i do n't need backups
harvard is the school i 'm going to
well then
you 'll need excellent recommendations from your professors a heck of an admissions essay and at least a one seventy five on your lsats
i once had to judge a theta chi tighty- whitey contest
trust me -- i can handle anything
what alibi
i ca n't tell you
you understand you 're on trial for murder
i did n't do it
i walked in saw my husband lying on the floor bent down to check his heart screamed my head off and chutney and enrique ran inside
where they saw you standing over the body covered in his blood
why would i kill my husband
insurance
a love affair
pure unadulterated hatred
believe me the da will come up with plenty of reasons
i loved him
he was thirty four years older than you
that does n't sound so good to a jury
brooke i believe you
but a jury is gon na want an alibi
i ca n't give you that
and if you put me on the stand i 'll lie
were you with another man
go to hell
i 'll take that as a no
are we done for today
i believe we are
what 're you so happy about
you 're on trial for murder
get up
what
you 're fired
i have new representation
who
are you okay
you look so sad
and so orange
i 'm glad it 's you and not donovan
he means well
he 's really brilliant and all
elle i ca n't
you do n't understand
who could better understand than me
it 's so shameful
whatever it is -- it could save you
that 's just it -- it would ruin me
how
i have made my fortune on my ability to teach women how to perfect their bodies with the brooke 's butt buster workout
i know
you helped me go from a six to a four
no
i 'm a fraud
but it 's not like normal people can have this ass
if my fans knew i 'd lose everything
i 've already lost my husband
i rather be in jail then lose my reputation
i 'm not having an affair with enrique -- you know a delta gamma would never sleep with a man who wears a thong
i just liked watching him bend over to clean the filter --
i believe you
do n't worry
what 's going on
enrique 's gay
i 'm sure of it
he did leave a cher tape in the pool house once --
i got out of the shower walked downstairs saw her standing over my father and called the police
did she have a weapon in her hand
no
was there any reason for you to believe she had discarded a weapon
uh yeah because the bitch shot him
was there any evidence that mrs. windham shot him
his dead body with a bullet in it
but you did n't hear the shot because you were in the shower
yes
i was washing my hair
miss windham can you tell us what you 'd been doing earlier in the day
i got up went to starbucks went to the gym got a perm and came home
where you got in the shower
yes
yes your honor
had you ever gotten a perm before miss windham
yes
how many would you say
two a year since i was twelve
you do the math
you know a girl in my sorority tracy marcinko got a perm once
even though we all told her not to
curls really were n't the right look for her -- she did n't have your bone structure
chutney why is it that tracy marcinko 's curls were ruined when she got hosed down
because they got wet
that 's right
because is n't the first cardinal rule of perm maintenance that you are forbidden to wet your hair for at least twenty four hours after getting a perm at the risk of de activating the ammonium thiglycolate
and if you in fact heard the gunshot then brooke windham would n't have had time to hide the gun before you got downstairs
which would mean that you would 've had to have found mrs. windham with a gun in her hand to make your story sound plausible
is n't that right
she 's younger than i am
did she tell you that
how would you feel if your father married someone younger than you
you however had time to hide the gun did n't you chutney
after you shot your father
dewey newcomb
who 's askin
i 'm elle woods
ms. bonafante 's attorney
come again
due to the fact that you retained the residence ms. bonafante is entitled to full ownership of the canine property in question and we will be enforcing said ownership immediately
huh
tell him paulette
why the hell not
i promised her i 'd keep it secret
i ca n't break the bonds of sisterhood
what are you talking about
he 's gay -- he is n't brooke 's lover
he 's making it up
whoever killed heyworth is paying him off
good work today ms. woods
thank you
sit down
is everything okay
you followed your intuition today and you were right on target
i should 've listened
thank you
about the alibi --
i 'm sorry but --
i 'm impressed that you took the initiative to go there and get it
that 's what makes a good lawyer
and on top of that you gained the client 's trust and kept it
that 's what makes a great lawyer
you 're smart elle
smarter than most of the guys i have on my payroll
i think it 's time discuss your career path
have you thought about where you might be a summer associate
not really
i know how competitive it all is --
you 're hitting on me
you 're a beautiful girl elle
so everything you just said --
i 'm a man who knows what i want
you 're not going up there
yes i am
so she was distraught that her husband was dead
oh yes
mrs. windham is the most sweet wonderful woman i know
i have loved her since the day she hired me
she could never do something this awful
i know this because we are very close
mr. salvatore do you have any proof that you and mrs. windham were having an affair
just the love in my heart
what 's going on
donovan 's firm is defending a major murder case and his caseload is so heavy he 's taking on first year interns
he chose them already
why did n't you call me
what
we spend a beautiful night together and then i never hear from you again
-- uh --
i 'm sorry
for what
breaking my heart or ruining sex for me with any other man
uh -- both
forget it
i 've already spent too many hours crying over you
massachusetts supreme judicial court rule 3:03
see
yes
aristotle
yes
would you be willing to stake your life on it
i think so
how about --
after you went to all that trouble
well what am i supposed to do
he 's engaged
she 's got the family six- carat on her bony unpolished finger
you 're asking the wrong girl
i 'm with my guy eight years and then one day it 's i met someone else
move out
what 'd you do
cried a lot and gained twenty pounds
dewey kept the trailer and my precious baby rufus
i got jackcrap
i did n't even get to go to his birthday party
no
what could i do
he 's a man who followed his pecker to greener pastures
i 'm a middle- aged high school dropout with stretch marks and a fat ass
happens every day
at least to women like me
that 's terrible
so what 's this sarah got that you do n't
three tits
she 's from connecticut
she belongs to his stupid country club
is she as pretty as you
is she
she could use some mascara and some serious highlights but she 's not completely unfortunate looking
could i be anymore goddamn spastic
so you 're sure this warner guy is the one
definitely
i love him
you showed up warner in class
you 're supposed to be showing up sarah
i could n't help it
it was the most fun i 've had since i 've been in law school
not only was i good enough for warner -- i was better than him
he has to see serious i am now
even donovan was impressed and he 's a total hard ass
you ready
no
yes you are
go -- you can do this
god that felt great
look at him
he 's still scratching his head
which must be a nice vacation for his balls
i feel so bad for her
i mean she 's in jail
and she 's innocent
but i 'm the only one who believes her
donovan totally thinks she 's guilty
that 's because men are big fat retards who do n't -- oh my god
and after they set his nose he came back for his truck and i offered to drive for him since he was still on pain killers and we spent the whole afternoon together
he was unconscious for part of it but it was really fun
i 'm so happy for you
how 'd it go at the trial
great
donovan actually said the words good work ms. woods
he takes me seriously
can you believe it
of course i can believe it
you 're going to make a great lawyer
you ca n't go home
what 's the point of staying
all people see when they look at me is blonde hair and big boobs
no one 's ever going to take me seriously
the people at law school do n't warner does n't -- i do n't even think my parents take me seriously
they wanted me to grow up and become a victoria 's secret model who marries a rock star
now for the first time it seemed like someone expected me to do something better with my life than wear underwear for a living
but i was kidding myself -- donovan did n't see me as a lawyer
he saw me as a piece of ass just like everyone else
it turns out i am a joke
i 'm here to see brooke windham
licensed attorney or family member
uh -- family
relation
i 'm her sister
name
delta
gamma
hi
sarah knottingham
you know her
our group is full
oh god was this like an rsvp thing
the idiot speaks
although mr. huntington makes an excellent point i have to wonder if the defendant kept a thorough record of each sperm emission made throughout his life
i believe her too
i do n't think she 's having an affair with enrique
too bad you and i are the only ones
i 'm still ca n't believe you did n't tell donovan the alibi
it 's not my alibi to tell --
i know
i thought that was very -- classy of you
really
thanks
you almost had me fooled
what
maybe you should sleep with the judge too
then we can win the case
i 'm a bitch
yes you are
and donovan 's a scumbag for coming on to you
yes he is
you 're pawning the rock
hell yes
we 've got finals to study for
in jamaica
can someone please tell rick that he is not the only sigma chi with a big penis
you guys are so sweet
why else would she have flown in from newport
it 's not like she 'd fed ex a six carat diamond
you think
too demure
i think you should go with red
it 's the color of confidence
well i do n't want to look like i know what 's coming
what if -- you know -- it 's not the night
why else would he be taking you to the ivy
you 've been dating for a year -- it 's not like he 's trying to impress you
i do n't know
everything was normal at first and then he said he needed someone more -- serious
serious
who the hell does he think he is
you 're the most popular month on the usc calendar
once warner sees me as a serious law student he 'll want me back
it 's a completely brilliant plan
but is n't it kind of hard to get into law school
i have the highest gpa in delta gamma
here
you 're gon na need this
your scrunchie
my lucky scrunchie
it helped me pass spanish
elle do you know what happened on days of our lives yesterday
why yes margot i do
once again we joined hope in the search for her identity
as you know she 's been brainwashed by the evil stefano --
it 's elle
guess what i 'm doing right this second
power yoga
picking out my wedding dress
what
josh proposed
no way --
keep june first open -- you 're one of my bridesmaids
and give warner our love
i will
oh how sweet
you made friends with a nerdy girl
margot
speaking of which can you please put on some party clothes
you look like someone rolled you in something sticky and dragged you through a k- mart
i ca n't believe you guys are actually here -- but this case is important
i 'll make it up to you after finals okay
i -- promise
i really want to do a good job
hello
you 're like a lawyer
not yet
donovan royalton and levinson
speak up in donovan 's class
he likes people with an opinion
sit in the back for royalton
he tends to spit when he talks about products liability
and make sure you read the footnotes in levinson 's class
that 's where all her exam questions come from
wow
i 'm glad i met you
good luck
thanks again for your help
do n't ask
i was n't gon na --
okay if brooke did n't kill the guy who did
my money 's on the angry daughter or the ex wife
explain to me why you 're so anti- brooke
uh for starters she wo n't give us an alibi --
aside from that
she 's completely untrustworthy
why
she married an old man she 's made a living on telling women they 're too fat she hawks her crap on the home shopping network
a he 's an old man with a really big penis
b she never told me i was fat
and c victoria principal sells on that network
and d brooke is obviously hiding something
but maybe it 's not what you think
but maybe it is --
you 're kind of being a butt head right now
how do you figure
because people are n't always what they seem to be and you refuse to see that
have a little faith
you might be surprised
i ca n't believe you called me a butthead
no one 's called me a butt- head since ninth grade
maybe not to your face
she 's not
did your daughter ever say anything to you about brooke and heyworth 's relationship
how can you still believe she 's innocent
you 're going to trust the word of a woman who named her child after a condiment
she 's ly ing
and you know this for a fact
did you see the icky black color of her hair
so
i never trust a woman who 's not blonde
except for my friend serena but that 's only because she 's a blonde at heart
that 's the whole reason i 'm starting the blonde legal defense fund
the what
blondes are discriminated against worldwide
brooke 's a blonde and people are saying she 's sleeping with the cheesy pool boy and shooting her husband
if she was a mousy brunette it would be oh the poor widow
you 're serious
okay how would it work
it would be a full service law firm by and for blondes providing positive blonde role models and community outreach in high blonde areas
i mean think about it -- name one blonde intellectual role model
i ca n't
that is a direct result of anti- blonde discrimination
wait -- hilary clinton
if she were a true blonde she would 've left the cheating bastard
blondes do n't let their husbands get fellated by brunettes and live to tell about it
in that case maybe heyworth got fellated by a brunette and brooke caught him
exactly how much gorilla sex do you think a sixty year old man can take
that 's not really a topic that keeps me up at night -- but maybe it should
what the hell is that for
the bags under your eyes
you 're an attractive man but you need to take better care of yourself
i do n't -- do that stuff
well you should -- if you look good you feel good and if you feel good you project joy into the world
projecting joy is not my job
fine
sorry i brought it up
you really think i 'm attractive
for a butt head
yes
he 's gay
enrique is gay
what
whoa -- why
law school was a mistake
getting this internship was a mistake
what 're you talking about
you earned it --
so now you 're --
going back to la
maybe i can fulfill my destiny as a useless bimbo and join the swedish bikini team
no more navy blue suits
no more panty- hose
no more trying to be something i 'm not
what if you 're trying to be something you are
the hell with donovan
stay
oh my god
oh my god
up for a celebration dinner
are you asking me on a date
as long as you realize i 'm not just some man toy you can show off like a trophy
then forget it
besides i have an early class tomorrow
so friday at eight
someone missed you
is he the only one
what do you think
but i 'm not positive it 's gon na happen tonight --
helloo
he just had lunch with his grandmother
you know he got the rock
no -- it 's just -- not me
i 'm canceling the mixer
we 'll blacklist sigma chi
thank you serena but i do n't think it 'll do any good
what happened
oh he is so over on this campus
i just do n't understand what went wrong --
calvin klein 's spring line is atrocious
do n't you agree
absolutely
almost
well hurry up so you can come home
we miss you
i miss you guys
the people here are so vile
hardly anyone even talks to me unless it 's to say something that 's not nice
law school sucks
oh my god
i completely forgot to tell you
what
i got bangs
really --
what 're you doing here
we 're on our way to the bridal show in new york so we thought we 'd rescue you from law school for the night
you guys -- i ca n't
we 're in the middle of a trial
where 's warner
i wish we could stay longer but i have a game
i ca n't believe you 're a laker girl
neither
why not
i 'd rather have a client who 's innocent
yes
ms. woods
i changed my mind
i 'd pick the dangerous one
i did
you 're applying for my internship are n't you
i do n't know --
you should
do you have a resume
i do
amazing how
she could make you drop three pounds in one class
she 's completely gifted
well in all likelihood she 's completely guilty as well
she was seen standing over her husband 's dead body
his twenty seven year old daughter and the pool boy
maybe she found him like that
that 's the story she 'll be telling the jury
we just have to prove it
you do n't really believe she 's innocent
of course i do
class schedule map book list
has warner huntington checked in yet
uh no
maybe you should try the lido deck
wait -- my social events schedule is missing
your what
you know -- mixers formals beach trips
there 's a pizza welcome lunch in twenty minutes
does that count
i guess it 'll have to
you 're beautiful
so are you
i 'm fully amenable to that discussion
i mean we 're having a lot of fun now -- but things are gon na be different when i 'm at harvard
law school is a completely different world
i need to be serious
of course
my family expects a lot from me
and i expect a lot from me
i plan on running for office some day
and i fully support that
but the thing is if i 'm gon na be a senator by the time i 'm thirty -- i ca n't keep dicking around
i completely agree
that 's why i think it 's time for us to --
i 'm sorry elle i just --
you 're breaking up with me
i thought you were proposing
proposing
elle if i 'm going to be a politician i need to marry a jackie not a -- marilyn
you 're breaking up with me because i 'm too -- blonde
that 's not entirely --
then what
my boobs are too big
elle -- no -- your boobs are fine --
what 're you talking about
you 're not here to see me
no silly
i go here
you go where
harvard
law school
you got into harvard law
what like it 's that hard
oops
time for class
meet me after
on the benches
uh -- sure
so -- uh -- how was your first class
fine
except for this horrible girl who made me look bad in front of my civ pro professor
but no biggie
you 're here now
how was your summer
good
good
do anything exciting
i 'm sorry i just hallucinated
sarah was my girlfriend at prep school
we got back together over the summer at my grandmother 's birthday party
wow
you 're a walking felony
thank you
having fun
now i am
i feel like we 've barely spent any time together since we got here
that 's because i spend all my time with case studies and hypos
tell me about it
i ca n't imagine doing all this and donovan 's internship next year
elle c'mon there 's no way you 'll get the grades to qualify for one of those spots
you 're not smart enough
i did n't mean --
am i on glue or did i not get into the same law school you did warner
well yeah but --
but what
we took the same lsat we take the same classes --
i just do n't want to see you get your hopes up
you know how you get
you look -- nice
thank you
thanks for the backup
how was i supposed to know what kind of shoes you had on
it made me realize something
i 'm an idiot
really
in court
on opposing sides
are you serious
huh
imagine that
looks like i am
did you ever take mrs. windham on a date
yes
where
a restaurant in oakland
where no one would recognize us
and how long have you been sleeping with mrs. windham
three months
and what is your boyfriend 's name
chuck
she 's naked
i 'm covered in very expensive egyptian mud -- hardly naked
so i hear the tart from california shot heyworth
well that 's what we 're trying to prove did n't happen
do you have any reason to believe it did
i never met the woman but from what my daughter tells me she 's quite the cun --
aside from the fact that he found her on an infomercial
she said they humped like gorillas
chutney could hear them all the way in the pool house
i m sure that was very awkward for chutney
much as it is for me hearing you tell about it
but i guess it was n't enough for brooke
why do you say that
have n't you seen the cabana boy
hovering
i did n't stick around long enough to watch him stick his swizzle stick in her mouth but i 'd bet my next check that that 's where he was about to put it
oh god
what if josh does n't think i 'm serious enough
helloo
you let him have anal sex with you
helloo
you let him videotape you diddling yourself
you 're right
phew
what 's the thing that always makes us feel better no matter what
cunnilingus
let 's all go
road trip
wait -- cecil has a condo in tahoe
let 's go there
why
i mean i know you 're upset and all but ca n't you just take a sedative
you passed spanish because you gave professor montoya a hand job after the final
yeah luckily
there he is
pull up next to him
why so few
faith
fool 's magic
precisely
faith has persuaded them a pygmie with a sling can kill an armed giant
we come watch
we come watch
nay
this is a private affair no audience welcome
better you watch the dismantling of our enemies
and look you see the moat is set aflame
fire moat
why do that
purely a precaution
what
delusion
a kind of magic which works against the magician
dumb magic
giant smash peewee
always
we go out smash 'em now
no
smashing is not required
i have a surprise for our tiny invaders
raise that hatch
birdies
pretty
i doubt the faeries will admire their beauty
come this will be fun to watch
we watch
good fun
indeed the best of fun
enjoy yourselves
more fun win battle
this is another victory my friends
what began with the lash shall be concluded with a caress
you go to lady now
to finish last evening 's delightful work
my generosity is not so large as that
what do you want with me
your love
your words sting more sharply than your whip
i speak of love and you think only of the lash
you are cruel
your heartless jesting worse than torture
how can you speak of love when you see what i am
i like well what i see
it pleases me
but i 'm hideous
you 're magnificent
grotesque
monstrous
on the contrary
the puling pallid creature you were before was truly something disgusting
now you are splendid
a fierce goddess
the embodiment of all that is strong and beautiful
you lie
you wish to humiliate me as if the form i 'm forced to bear were not punishment enough
you should glory in your animal nature
it is your triumph
none know that better than i
god protect me
not from me surely
you
you 're a beast
we 're all of us beasts my dear
only most are afraid to show it
and you
are you not also afraid
i am afraid of nothing
then why hide behind a mask
you are ashamed
i know no more of shame than i do of fear
i wear this mask not for concealment but protection
protection
i am a creature of darkness
i require the shadow 's solace and the black of night
sunlight is abhorrent to me
i cover myself completely whenever i venture forth in daylight
sunshine is my destroyer
like some vile toadstool
i prefer to think more like the sagacious owl
do you feed on mice and rats
i prefer a plump capon but will happily serve you rats if they 're to your liking
why have you brought me here
to be my bride of course
i 'd soon die
jack
oh jack
help me
too bad your precious jack ca n't hear you
the damsel in distress
a rescue attempt would be most amusing
we could flay sweet jack alive as an after dinner entertainment
your moans seem almost pleasurable my dear
developing a taste for the lash
kill me
i want
so nice
why should i kill you
a simple course in etiquette
something your parents sadly overlooked
no more
please
i can keep a victim alive for weeks
months if i desire it
it 's an art
they beg for death
i keep it just out of their reach
the pain remains constant
do n't please
i 'll do what you desire
sweet princess you begin to sound most reasonable
what do you want from me
at the moment very little
your company at my table
we 'll get you cleaned up find a suitable gown
i imagine you 'll enjoy a good meal
oh yes
a few day 's nourishment will see your strength returning
and then
yes
what will become of me then
when you are ripe for my pleasure i will enjoy the harvest
i see
i 'm pleased you 're not troubled by the prospect
do as you wish with my body you 'll never possess my soul
your soul
why should i bother with such a paltry trifle
i do n't expect you 'd understand
my dear princess the human soul is a highly elusive commodity
i suggest you spend some hours before the glass
contemplate your intriguing reflection and consider whether such a creature as yourself could possibly possess something as fine and beautiful as a soul
you 're a beast
indeed i am my dear
that makes us a pair
what was that
did you hear that
it 's nothing
my men take great delight in routing the enemy
do n't trouble yourself beauty
it sounded like it came from the courtyard
from the parapets most likely
the men are amused by a battlefield entertainment of my own contriving
might we watch too
later beloved
now i wish only to be with you
and i with you
i never dreamed life held such pleasures
pleasure is for those who seize it
do you think those insipid pale- skinned mortals will ever know such rapture
it 's odd
when i first found myself
changing
i was sick with loathing and disgust
i thought i was so ugly i wanted to die
and now
now i want to live forever
i 've never felt so strong or happy
or looked so beautiful
yes
i feel that too
weakness is what is ugly
precisely my darling
your animal strength your primitive power has surfaced
you are what you desire
to be strong and free
that is all i desire
so you shall be
like our brothers the hawk and the wolf our spirits know no master
we are created in the pure image of the savage god that set our turbulent universe in motion
friend ogg
excuse our enthusiasm occasioned as it was by a fondness for you
honeythorn gump is it
i 've not seen your ugly face since you sold me a jug of cow piss claiming it was dragon 's tears
well bygones're bygones i always say
or was it the time you and jimmy squarefoot stole the golden apples i 'd forged
twas jimmy done that i merely stood for the blame unfairly
but here now ogg this be no time to rehash old differences i 've friends along in need of safe haven for the night
who might these friends be
screwball you know and many other of the wee folk
we serve as escort for our grand champion jack o the green
baron couer de noir is a blight gainst all nature
we dwarves be not fighters still we are with you in this battle
some of our handiwork may be of assistance
we be honored friend ogg
there 's a coil of golden thread fine as spider web yet naught can break it
and a silver key no lock can resist
so jack
think you be a green man and not know gump
gump is it
aye honeythorn gump come to serenade you jack
come to make you dance
i 'm in no mood for dancing
oh but you will be jack
think you to sleep in a faerie ring and not spend the night a dancing
faerie ring
to be sure
no
tis not the time
i want no part of your frolic
dance jack
the night 's but begun
enough
and how is it a mortal dare dictate to the faerie folk
is me music not to your liking
mayhap the dance of death by more your pleasure
no
i
i need to rest
you 'll have a long long rest in the tomb me lad
i meant no disrespect
did n't you now
well then answer me this riddle and all be forgiven
and if i can not
why jack then tis your death song i 'll be strumming
it 's bluebells
what
the flower
bluebells
to hear them ringing means your life 's at an end
damnation
codfish and cockles
gammon and trotters
you 've bested me jack
a riddle without an answer is but an empty cup when you 're thirsty for wine
well spoke
true to the mark
and if it 's wine you 're wanting it 's wine we shall have
you be our guest jack
i 'm honored honeythorn gump
but no more tricks
you have me word lad
to answer a faerie riddle deserves as much
twas the princess lili gave me the answer
have you seen her by chance
i 've laid eyes on no mortal but you this day jack
i fear she 's lost
mayhap you be the one what 's lost and she safe by the castle hearth
but come jack we 'll warm your bones
but
but why
big question that lad
why what
why has this happened to the world
why is it winter now and dark
aye
honeythorn gump'd be a powerful wizard indeed could he answer
do n't you know
if you 're looking for enchantment jack that i can give thee
that much magic i can offer ye a small measure of entertainment at best
making the world a frozen hell is beyond me modest powers
then what 's gone wrong
why did it happen
if ye want more tricks i 'm your man but for big questions ye must go elsewhere
do n't you care about what 's happened
course we care
what good 's the world locked in a season of death
frozen up no folks to scare out of their wits on a summer 's night no babies to tickle no more spells to cast
think that 's an enjoyable prospect
there must be an answer somewhere
true
but it wo n't come easy or free
if ye want to ask ask jenny greenteeth
jenny greenteeth
who 's she
someone worthy of respect lad
she be a water spirit lives in a bog down at sea side
hideous creature to look at even by my doubtful standards devours little children she does when she can catch them
how is it this hag knows the truth
think there be truth only in beauty lad
if you 've the courage to ask and take care to avoid her terrible claws jenny greenteeth has the answers you seek
will you lead me to her
aye
on the morrow we go but tonight
tonight is for making merry
are we here
aye
that foul wallow be where jenny greenteeth dwells
oona
lure her out
play the part of a girl child
what do i do
do n't get caught that 's what
she 'll suck your bones like honey- comb
here now
toss her this when you 've the chance
jenny greenteeth ca n't resist the sight of herself in a glass
she 's terribly vain
praise her beauty and you 'll lull her sweet as a babe in a cradle
and if she thinks me a liar
fie on what she thinks
you mind her claws and teeth
cast your spell oona
the princess is dead
lamentable news jack
but tis the fate of the living concerns us now
did you hear
twas the killing of the unicorn caused it
aye
black baron 's mischief
if the horn be restored the curse is ended
time for a champion
can you do more than pick acorns and rob bird 's nests jack
i 'll do what i have to do for princess lili 's sake
bravely spoke
you 've the heart of a champion true enough
twill take more than heart
where do we find the armor of achilles for a start
i know where to find it
taking possession be another matter
there it be lad
the lindfarne mound
kings long forgotten lie there lost in their final sleep
have we turned grave robber then
a tomb it once was boy and a tomb it may yet be
there 's another in residence at lindfarne now
and who might that be
no less a creature than the lindfarne worm
so i 'm to be a dragon slayer is that it
now jack lad no one 's asking ye to skewer the worm
even st. michael'd have a job on his hands for all that
but the serpent hoards a pile of booty achilles armor among his treasures
if we find our way within the mound and him asleep
knaves and robbers
by the grace of god
no false modesty lad
you 're a proper champion
achilles armor sits on you like it was forged to fit
i believe this is a sword such as the archangels wield
surely st. michael had so fine a blade when he drove the serpent from heaven
well then you 've got the sword and you 've got the armor all 's lacking is the steed
shhhh
screwball
you dolt
i 've a mind to change you into a toad
what is it
something 's coming
pregnant is she
it would appear so
damn them
careful lad
do n't see why i ca n't ride too
i 'm second in command damn it
the colt 's still too small
i 'm small
and i can make myself smaller still
small as a bee
small as dust
want to see me do it
we 've no time for tricks this day honeythorn gump
tricks is it
why i 'll trick ye
ungrateful whelp
i 'll sour your milk and bird droppings'll fall from the sky wherever ye walk
save your mischief for the black baron
aye
that too
you 'll need more than bird droppings for blackheart
i 'll drop a cow on the knave
drop a mountain on him and we wo n't need our troops
fine looking army
we march on castle couer de noir within the hour
how do you plan on finding this here castle if ye do n't mind me asking
a true and troubling question gump
we 'll start from where the unicorn was killed
the baron must have left a trail
track the demon to his lair
aye
and hang his foul hide up like dirty laundry for the drying
this is ogre 's magic
blackheart
aye
he 's enchanted the lot of them
his reward for delivering the unicorn
foul fellow this couer de noir
the foulest
mayhap i can cut them free
jack do n't
worse than the battlefield
what know you of fields of war
ofttimes the wee folk come out to tend the wounded
staunch bleeding with cobwebs
give a parched mouth a sip of dew
cool a fevered brow
there
it seems to quit
i 'll wager that war held other attractions quite apart from nursing
well
if the knight be already dead what harm is there in
borrowing a thing or two
stealing his arms
oona tells me the raven has roosted for the night on a sharp stone spire some half a mile distance
that would be devil 's needle
last landmark i know in these woods
good
beyond devil 's needle all is unknown
twould appear other travelers precede us
nay jack tis not what you 're thinking
i trust our own welcome will be more hospitable
jack jack it 's dwarves live here
hard working chaps
hammering in the forge all the live long day
make the most wondrous things they do
and this
some of their handiwork
nay
that 's but to distract the casual visitor
a dwarf is too busy to suffer fools gladly
better to kill than be disturbed
your imagination runs away with you jack
those bones be but battlefield gleanings like i mentioned
a wee bit of carrion to frighten off the uninvited
here is a bold champion 's reward to serve as a dwarf 's doorstop
nice piece of work
pure gold it is
plays a different note every time
i should hope not
gump you 're putting words in my mouth
i pray always to be worthy of it
stoutly spoke lad
these dwarves be sore grouches
pay no heed to their spiteful grumbling
do n't let this talk of heroes upset you jack
sigurd 's sword is no great thing
the volsung killed fafnir
you killed lindfarne
that 's one worm apiece
i 'd say you and sigurd were neck and neck
we 're not in a tournament gump
ah but a sword twice tempered in the blood of living dragons
tis not the sword that counts but the man what swings it
rest easy jack
god protect you honeythorn gump
your strong right arm 's all the protection i 'll need this night
make haste
we 've a hard day 's march ahead
be gentle with them jack
they only march to please you
were this a faerie journey we 'd ride the wind on thistledown and ragwort stems
... this rate
we 'll all be in our graves
fore we reach the baron 's fortress
we 'll surely be in our graves if we do n't
going grows slower
we 've not made
half a mile in two hours
god 's blessing
there 's the way mates
what make ye of that jack
it bodes evil
wait
willful creature that one
why not admit it honeythorn gump
we 've lost our way entirely
long as we do n't lose heart jack
we 'll never find the baron 's castle
once you thought we 'd never find the greek 's armor and look at ye now decked out like a proper hero
wait jack
nay
this time we strike first
hold jack
do n't strike
nay
i show no pity to imps and fiends
i know the rogue jack
tis jimmy squarefoot
aye
we be on a quest to set the world aright --
but seem to have gotten lost on the way
can we trust him
no
but what choice have we
never felt so cold in all me born days
the chill is worse this night
do n't like the feel of it jack
it 's your own fear troubles you
we 're here are n't we
for all the dark magic protecting it
give in to despair and all is lost
it feels wrong jack
like a trap
there 's more than one way to spring a trap
aye so long as you 're not too greedy for the bait
a fine mess this is
horrid nipping creatures
what do we now jack
defend ourselves
we 've bested far worse already
easily spoken
do n't loose heart
assemble the archers
have everyone not holding a shield man a bow
shoot the damned things as they fly
there are n't enough arrows
never mind
just do it
retrieve the arrows somehow
water does n't burn
and frog do n't fly and bite like tomcats
it be magic jack
powerful ogre 's magic
there is n't much time
been telling you that all along lad
what magic have we on our side
faerie magic 's no match for a sorcerer 's power
we have ogg 's gifts the key and the --
that 's it
the unbreakable line
we 'll tie it to an arrow and fire it up into the timbers above the portculis
then i 'll climb up and chop down the drawbridge
will you chance a miss
there must be some way to get it up there
one more turn
that 's it
have the engineers corrected for alignment and trajectory
aye
before the wee pesties attacked
then it 's godspeed screwball
fire away
he 'll be atop the portculis ere long
best get down close to the moat lad
aye
we 're good as inside
it 's what we 'll find there worries me
jack
the courtyard 's been taken
the baron 's forces are besieged in the south tower
no sign of
jack
do you hear what i 'm saying
we 've won lad
it does n't matter
nonsense
course it matters
... the princess lili
i 've killed her
she 's sore hurt jack tis true but not dead yet
the wound is mortal
nay
you 've not reckoned with the powers of faerie medicine
can you save her
easily
the question is can we save ourselves
be a shame to win the battle only to lose the war
i do n't
understand
the alicorn lad
come to your senses
unless we find baron couer de noir and bring back the horn the world is doomed
the baron hides in the dark in a passage under the castle
quick give me the dwarf 's key
the one which opens any lock
in the dark lad
why should he do that
because sunlight will kill him
quickly now give me the key
sunlight you say
aye
hurry now gump the key
mean you to seek him out below
i 'm not afraid of the dark
i admire your valor jack
by all means seek him out
but first we needs visit the kitchen
hey
stop it
i ca n't see
ah but you will
and so will the baron when we bring a little light to his dark hideaway
ca n't we move any faster
tis a delicate operation lad
requires a bit of engineering
next
seems to be some sort of vaulted chamber up ahead
do n't get too far
hurry up
he 's getting away
he was at my mercy
never show mercy
i could have struck off his head just now
ever wondered why jenny greenteeth said you needed the fastest steed on earth
sapphire
ride like wild fire jack
he 'll not escape me
you 're on your own
like a true champion
a good day for singing
i 've not heard a note out of you
not in the mood i 'm afraid
listen to him
not in the mood
on a day like none other the blessed earth has ever seen
a day so fair as forty springtimes --
i 'm not denying it 's a joyous day --
where 's your joy if you can not sing
were the princess lili to join me i would sing till my lungs burst
she lives
is n't that worth singing about
she lives like all the world before the baron 's curse lifted
now the world 's reborn yet still she sleeps
the quest 's at an end and where 's the good of it
a faerie festival over a pile of bones
tis not the wound that 's sure
not a scar remains
we 're talking about a spell harder to repair than sword work
i 'll do anything
face any challenge
might not need a gesture quite so grand
what were you doing the very moment the baron 's curse fell on the world
i was with the princess
where
by the pond
she was teasing me
go on
go on
she tossed her ring in the pond and bid me fetch it
said she 'd marry me if i did
and did you
nay
it was lost
when i came up for air the pond was frozen over
that 's it then
the ring
well done lad
stout heart
wolf slayer worm sticker
give a cheer for the champion
barely living from the looks of it
no no no
this is different
you see
you see
these chaps'll need a woodpecker to pick their teeth
ogg lives there
and thurgis
screwball
be quiet
we have friends live neath the needle
they 'll no doubt provide safe refuge for the night
we seek to undo the curse
gon na make ogre stew
well done lad
three cheers for our champion
look at that shot
three at once
i ca n't miss
very thrifty
even got your arrow back
sweet slippers of oisin
they 've fired the moat
start acting like you 're worthy of this mission
here
whatever you do do n't dare drop it
nay sire i 'll cling to it as to life itself
good lad
here jack give me a hand with the windlass
there 's a good fellow
how 're these
they 'll do nicely
dolt
sorry
greetings my lady the green wood is honored
oh jack you are a wild man to use me so
these for me
if you like
you promised
never
but you did
you did
i may have said perhaps
liar
or perchance
it 's my father gone a hunting
the baron couer de noir is his guest and must be provided with some sport
sport indeed
the baron is a frightful man
they say he 's an ogre
he wears a mask so none may see his face
blackheart
aptly named
oh fie
what about the unicorn
unicorn
a promise is a sacred oath
all right
i 'll show you something sacred
let 's rest a minute
i 'm so thirsty
stop complaining
a gentleman would offer water
only were he a fool to boot
see yon viper
i detest serpents
that viper has envenomed the water
no animal will drink here now
what shall we do
be patient
such grace
and their smell it 's ambrosia
they rival the angels of paradise
oh jack might n't i touch one
it would thrill me so
are you honest
jack
tis a fair question
if you be a virtuous maid the unicorn will lay his head in your lap
he 'll not flee if i show myself
not if you be chaste
tis an awesome test of virginity
i 've no fear of failure
your implications are most unbecoming
i 'm not your judge
nor have i any desire to witness the trial
where are you going
to fetch your napkin
what happened
i do n't know
they 've hurt the unicorn
who
my father and the baron
damned hunters
it was a trap and you were the bait
i did n't know
i did n't
it was so lovely
he was in my lap like
like a baby
and
i
they tricked you
my own father
how bad was the unicorn 's wound
it happened so fast
he was hurt and ran away
he did run
oh yes and the mare with him
good
they 'll never catch him
there 's not a mount in the kingdom can outrun a unicorn
there are many would pay a king 's ransom for a few drops of unicorn blood
i do n't want it on me
its powers are strong
i do n't want to be reminded of what happened
do you think memory can be washed away like a few spots of blood
not even the birds sing sweet as you
jack
green jack you must n't flatter me so
tis the truth
a maid must beware of flattery
methinks you want to kiss me
there 's no happier thought under heaven
if i were your bride would the kissing ever stop
do you wish to marry me jack
my lady mocks me
nay jack i 'm but wary of your intentions
my heart intends no more than that you love me as i do you
oh la
i 'm afraid it may storm
let it
have n't you a cozy bower we might hide in
tis not fit for a princess
be it fit for your wife green jack
i have no wife
then perchance you 'll me
if wishes were horses even beggars would ride
do you wish it jack
wish you this our wedding band
what if i answer yes
will my wish come true
lili
no
jack
forgive me
what have i done
only what 's right
oh
green jack
what a dream i 've had
proper nightmare
whilst you were sleeping i fetched your ring
sweet jack
i 'm so sorry you found me asleep
do n't know what came over me
i ca n't have been under much more than a minute
seemed like weeks and weeks
such a terrible dream
i could never tell you
is what you said about the ring but another dream
oh no dearest jack
i meant every word
you 're teasing still
nay dearest jack
you are to be my husband
i want none other
but
i am a green man
i have no title nor lands
scarce even a few vines and threads to keep the cold from my body
you wear your weeds as well as golden armor jack
like a true prince
a champion
lili
i love you
and i love you my husband
what 's the matter
ouch
something 's biting me
biting you
pinching me
pinching
where
everywhere
ow
i ca n't see a thing
nor can i. damn
it 's buzzing all around me
ouch
i can hear it like a fly trapped inside my ear
says its name is oona
oona
do you suppose it 's a faerie
ow
whatever it is it hurts
honored to make your acquaintance
grand champion is it
and what great cause leads you to me
we seek the ogre baron couer de noir
he slew a unicorn and plunged the world into eternal winter
thought the weather terrible of late
step lively now
his feet shall never cross my lips
sigurd 's sword
another hero 's hand me down
thurgis note the armor tis greek work
what 's this now
i bring you the only treasure worthy of your loveliness
for naught else in the universe rivals the reflected glory of your beauty
well spoke boy
you have discerning taste for one so young
just who might you be
they call me green jack ma'am
come closer then jack that i might give you proper thanks
your fair smile be thanks enough
better i stand afar to admire your beauty complete
this is sad news be it true
do n't be sad jack not with me here to give you cheer
tis not the time to speak of cheer
you 'll visit again
as a hummingbird returns to the fairest blossom
what a fine meal you 'd make be the rest of you sweet as your tongue
courage jack
i pray god grants it me
this is not the time for squabbling
sorry
were i a mortal girl jack methinks i 'd be in love with you
then i 'd kiss you without turning my garments inside out and sewing bells all over
no need for bells jack
i 'll nay enchant ye
such a sad world be there no unicorns to brighten it
no fear of that now
never even had a sword in my hand until yesterday
then tis not for chastity
methought you kept a naked blade twixt you and any maiden chanced spend the night
i live in an abandoned fox den neath the roots of a thousand year old oak
my bed is pine boughs and rabbit skins
there 's no need of weaponry to keep the maids away
i 'm partial to oaks as are all faerie folk
may n't i come visit sometime
i 'd be honored
only that
and charmed of course
fie
do n't speak of charms
i should charm you for being so dull- witted
i had no thought of offending you oona
do i not please you jack
in every way
and am i not fair
wondrously so
then why do you speak sweeter words to jenny greenteeth
that was in jest
jest with me then
how so
tell me i 'm fair as you did the hag
you are fair as the first new flower of spring
and sweet
sweeter than bee pollen on a summer wind
pray you be sweet as your words dear jack
nay oona tis not possible
a faerie 's love makes anything possible
i 'm promised to another
what shape i take matters not
long you for another
i 'll give you your heart 's desire
oona
do n't cry
please you must n't
you
you
you mortal you
please
why should i feel such pain
should be the other way round
i could vex you
make you dance your life away
threats wo n't make me love you
tis not the way of the human heart
the fastest in the world
i know where to find him
he lies out on the marsh raven fodder his horn torn from his head
what do we do now
we wait
what 's she doing
i think she 's about to foal
i 'm in your debt screwball
watch behind or i 'll never collect on it
praise be to god
small miracles better than no miracles
master jack
master jack
these woods are alive
they 're alive
of course they 're alive
all nature is living
where
up ahead
come on gump let 's have a look at this witchcraft
what can you steal from a man already lost his life
his honor i suppose
seeing he no longer can defend it
hello jack
done like a champion
can you reach me with the line
sorry jack
it 's done
we 'll never catch him
your fond wishes give me strength dear friends
no speeches
what 's a little swim after sticking worms and ogres
each fit for a hero
my uncle fashioned a hammer for thor
twas he named it mjolnir
grandfather forged excalibur
you wo n't ever see finer craftsmanship
oh but i have
how came you by this blade
i slew the lindfarne worm with it
the avatar
i like the sound of it
sigurd the volsung slew fafnir with that blade
see the line where regin welded the break
uhm
fine work
achilles wore it before the gates of troy
you 're well equipped i 'd say
legendary arms
you 're with us in battle
may god protect you
forgive my blood haste jimmy squarefoot but i want no more surprises from couer de noir
the black baron you say
lost
much good we do the world for all our noble quest
jimmy squarefoot no lost
simple as that eh
castle couer de noir built with magic
simple as death
strong as hate
you do know where it is
can you show us the way
to castle couer de noir
there 'll be spoils aplenty if you guide us there
once we breach the walls help yourself to all you can carry
that very nice
let that be our problem just get us there
you follow
it be the castle
we feel the castle
it be that close
a castle 's but stone and mortar --
nay
castle couer de noir is devil 's work
built with sorrow and grief
plenty treasure inside
jimmy seen it once
you 've been inside
in a dream
do n't speak to me of dreams
i feel i 've been dreaming since the unicorn was killed
marco
what are you doing
i 'm not cheating
i 'm not looking
are you going to see sam again
i thought i might stop by
you can go back to bed
or lois might let you go swimming
i wanna be with you today
oh honey
there 's not much to do there
i mean it 's all work
we can work
i woke up this morning at three and could n't fall back asleep
everyday i think i see more of sam than i 've seen in years
sam
did you know him before you knew dad
since seventh grade
and video games after
home after
will you come in and say hi
that 's how you get things right is to always try and never give up
huh mom
i guess it depends on what you give up on
he 's not there
he 's here
check the bathroom
i checked everywhere
he 's not there
when does george get to come see his house
it 's so beautiful
he has n't called
who are you
do you guys feel like painting
what color
red
i love red
that 's my favorite color
mom
here honey
i put him to work
what 's wrong
i could n't get it to go down
and why was the alarm on
oh
i set it to see if it would work
you 'd better call and cancel
oh god we do n't want the police
what are you doing up so early
i could n't sleep last night
i 'm supposed to be mad at you but i 'm not
why
what do you mean
uh
using josh like that
i 'm going to bed
has he eaten anything at all
sorry i got you into trouble
i 'll survive
he must
he seems lonely
are you his friend
no
why
marilyn manson
and i guess he 's into guys
i hate nose rings
and the blue eye shadow thing really is n't working
alyssa
why have you put a toilet and a bed in your garage
i 'm living here while i build another house
is that legal
do n't you have school
nope
what 's today
monday
my keys
what 's that
i had them in my pocket
i 'm not shaving my legs or pits this summer i 've decided
can you keep sam straight
he 's not gay
i found out purely by accident believe me
i mean drugs
i thought you said he was
he would n't use around me
i do n't like any of it
you 're a good girl
i need to ask you something mr. nelson
my mother would die
let 's shut up and not kill her
it 's not what i was expecting
what did you think it would be
i do n't know
more like when i kissed sam
i 'm hungry
where 's my dinner
who ate my dinner
huh
who 's in trouble now
hi
hey
what are you doing here
they 're trying to make me spend the summer here
i 'm leaving in the morning
where to
i 'm supposed to be in tahoe
your dad 's really gon na build his house
i do n't know
well if you do n't go i guess i 'll see you
you should stay
i do n't know
where 's your dad
he jumped into the ocean
tell him i said hi
he 's a freak
you look better without make up
i ca n't even take a shower here
come over to my house whenever you want
i 'll tell my mom
i might not stay anyway
i 'll get your back
no
that 's okay
do you remember me from when you lived here
yeah
your dad dated my mom after her divorce
really
i wanted him to marry her
why
turn over
not really
no
kinda
he got busted
his parents took his car
they 're making him ride a bicycle the rest of the summer
really
he asked me to tell you that you owe him a hundred dollars
he can peddle over anytime he wants to for it
this is serious
i do n't have my license
he was my ride
i 'm sorry
i 'm just here to shower
i 've seen lots of people
it 's not a big thing for me
hand me a towel
i 'm getting out
i 'm coming in
i do n't want you to
we 're not gon na do anything
why are you so stupid
why are you so uptight
i do n't even
what do you mean
i do n't even know what that means
it means i 'm gon na shampoo my hair and stay out of your way
hand me a towel
hand me a towel
what 's the point of this
does everything have to have a point
it 's freakish
i do n't get it
i 'm not really supposed to touch you but i can look
are you sure you 're totally into guys
what are you talking about
josh said
i 'm not gay
i was wondering
you 're driving me crazy
do you know what it 's like trying to jack off in an armoire
not really
you 're off you know
you 're way way off
i thought i was helping you
it would help me if i could kiss you
no i don't
no
i thought we were just friends
what you think you know does n't have much to do with reality
i mean i hope i 'm not the first to say that about you
okay but then we 'll just be friends
okay
okay
i guess
on the handlebars or your shoulders
are you afraid of heights
i do n't wanna go
he asked where you were
he wants you with him
i do n't wanna go
where are you
floating to catalina
what
you 're so nice to let sam use your shower
he 's got a standing invitation
why is that
just i mean well you 're here every single day
he 's at work while i 'm here
i guess i 'd just be jealous if i were him
well he does n't need to worry
if my kids and my wife were always at an ex husband 's house i 'd worry
he 's not the type to worry
he wo n't leave my room
will he talk to me
no
this is such a street of whiners
from tuesday to yesterday not including monday or today
okay
mrs
dokos is repeatedly running over her lawn
the corliss have attributed the increase in rat population in their environs to the state of your
structure
ipo 's caused the rat population on this street
and of course the beck 's with the
it could have been a squirt gun
you 've been good this week
are you guys friends
we 've known each other since grade school
i mean but did you both go camping on weekends
listen to music
masturbate together
talk on the phone
mr. dokos says that your father missed his height envelope by six inches
he wants the entire roof taken off and lowered
mr. stevens
i 've been dreading you
bob larson
do you happen to have an unenclosed toilet in close proximity to a kitchen
a violation
oh yes
and if i enclosed it
an exhaust system or a window is code
a sink
allowed outside the enclosed area
i hate to ask about a window
i flushed it down the toilet
i assume you 'll fill the
uh window with glass
if that 's what it takes
mr. stevens
one of your neighbors is adamant your home has exceeded its approved height
he 's filed to have construction stopped immediately
it 's thirty feet
well if it is we have a problem
i have the permit
after your last extension request and with design review and the board of adjustment and the appeals to the city council was there an amended permit
to the patio and one north facing window
and six inches to the height
that would take weeks
months
this is n't me
we can show clients endless options change anything in a matter of hours on the computer
but you wo n't change
typing and clicking myself to renderings is n't why i started building models
all of us are typing and clicking george
whether we want to or not
i 'm not
which is why we bid out a quarter of our projects
it does n't make a lot of sense anymore to want what we do n't have and do n't want what we do
i 've been here twenty years
maybe that 's too long
maybe
that 's too long
oh
how old are you
forty
we were probably in school together
you went to berkley
class of eighty six
i did n't know you were there
i was a sophomore when i got the call my parents were dead
listen
maybe i can get you a year
i hate this job
what are you talking about
you love your job
from the day i started
to today
ca n't stand it
then it sounds like i 'm doing you a favor
it may sound that way but i react out of fear
my life has nothing to do with what i like or do n't like
you have n't been listening have you
i did n't know there would be a quiz george
for everything
well i feel better about this now
good
i was hoping for that
i 've got one favor to ask
what can i do for you george
i built my first model here when i was twenty
there are hundreds of them on shelves around the office
twenty years of my life
i was wondering if i might be able to pick a few to keep to take home
only the ones that really mean something to me
oh well
those are
i mean we do n't get to keep our work
i could maybe ask them if you could choose one
but you know frankly george you were the best
computer models ca n't begin to match the beauty you gave yours
they 're a part of this firm
they inspire me
i go out there and sometimes just stare at something i 've designed
it amazes me
i would miss that too much
look i may be going out on a limb but you go out there and look them over every single one of them and pick the one you like the best and take it with you
just run it by me first just in case you know
but i 'm sure it 'll be okay
thank you
well it 's the least i can do
yes it is
thanks for the shower
i want you both to stay
come over anytime you need to sam
thanks i 'd like that
thank you
if she 's not up you can use my shower
thank you
you 're here early today
we 're getting out of the ground today
is alyssa here
it 's midnight
what 's the matter sam
nothing
my dad 's dying
i really need to talk to alyssa
this has got to stop
he escaped
he 's going back in
does it give you some sort of perverse pleasure to expose your
penis in plain view of my sixteen year old daughter
there are no windows facing my
exposure
george this is the third time
the plumber 's due out on friday
you 'll have to explain that to the police
you were the only neighbor i could tolerate
i did warn you
my life is a warning
i just ca n't figure out for what
i forgot where i put my keys
and you thought they might be under her dress
hello
where are you
you 're driving me crazy waiting like this
i want you in me now
the whole summer man
party in tahoe
i do n't know
it 'll just be my brother the dweeb on weekends
all we got ta do is sand and paint the cabin dude
my dad 's gon na let me use the boat and my charm is gon na let me use my rod
income village is the place to hook up with hump
i 'll ask
hey it beats letting town folk go down on you for the summer
did you tell him he 's spending the summer with me
no i 'm not
who are you anyway
i do n't even know you
you 'll know me by the time we 're through
i 'm not going
i 'll get your bag
mom tell him i 'm not going
you already promised me
you have everything
i 'm not going
you do n't have a choice
mom
please
your nose ring comes out of your nose
if you 've got them in your nipples they come out too
and there 's no make up at my house
no glue sniffing
huffing
no pills no grass
if you hit me i 'll call the police
you 've worn out your welcome at this house sam
i wo n't ever hit you
this may well be the worst three months of your life but you 've earned it
so pick up your suitcase and go get in the truck
now
i 'll hate you forever
you ca n't even begins to know how much i hate my father
think of it as a family tradition
are you totally insane
i almost saw catalina
probably in the bible
goodnight
what are you doing
i warned you yesterday
do n't touch me
you ca n't touch me
i want you to take out your nose ring and leave it out
why
it bugs me
you snore at night
that bugs me
can i take you out
your brothers are right
it was the most god awful smell i 've ever had my nose around
i do n't know
i 'm gon na take a walk
i need some money
you 'll have money when you work
you 're so predictable
no one would blame me if i left
i 'd blame you
i want you here
i 'm not doing it
it 'll be fine
why do n't you just beg some money off my dad and move into something decent with a real kitchen and a real bathroom
i 'd rather sell my nuts to a castrati
i do n't beg
and i do n't take a shower in the middle of the yard
i can promise you complete privacy
you ca n't promise me anything
you do n't have anything to promise
you live in a garage
you do n't have cable
you 're not hooked up to the internet because you do n't even own a computer
you do n't have a job
if you had a stupid phone or i could use your truck mom would give me some money
you 'll have money when you work for it
i 'm leaving
hey
hey
where are you going
i do n't know
when are you going to be back
i do n't know
well until you know you ca n't go
oh okay
where is it
a friend of yours is here
did you got through my pants
i might have a solution
i was holding for someone
that was n't even mine
the game was to make me smaller than he was
no matter what
he could be almost invisible as a human being but i had to be smaller
so if i got good grades i was a pussy for not playing football
if i cut my hair for him it was n't short enough
if i shaved it i looked like a psycho
i never won the game
not once
and if he could n't make me smaller with words
i 'll have to pay him back
i wo n't ever hit you
i do n't want you smaller
i want you to be happy
you 're not
not here with me
not home with your mother
not up in tahoe
not alone
not anywhere
you 're what i was most of my life sam
i see it in your eyes
in your sleep
in your answer to everything
you 're barely alive
i 'm not even listening
you know that great thing though
is that change can be so constant you do n't even feel the difference until there is one
it can be so slow that you do n't even notice that your life is better or worse until it is
or it can just blow you away
make you something different in an instant
it happened to me
twenty years of hating what you live in
what you are
this is the end of it sam
i 'm gon na build something of me here that i can be proud to give to you
do n't
i do n't want it
do whatever you want with it
i do n't care
all i want from you is for you to remember we built this house together
we have n't build shit
you 're just tearing down your father
try it
it feels good
hi alyssa
hi mom
i took some of your vicodin
i know
why
i like how it feels not to feel
i know the feeling
how do you become something you 're not
what would you like to be
what i 'm not
what are you now
nothing
that 's not true
see that 's the thing
i am what i say i am
i know parts of who you are
what do you know about me
when you started first grade and your mom went to work it was so she could save for an apartment
but then she met peter and skipped the idea of renting
he 's got nothing to do with me
i could n't imagine how i could compete with him for any part of you
so i did n't
he wanted you to have his last name
i let him even take that
he was a prick when i was six and he 's a prick today
i loved him too much
after everything he did to you and your mom
after everything
that 's so weird
dale wants to know if we should run an outside outlet for christmas lights with a switch inside
absolutely
have him put it on a separate line
at christmas we 'll pact it so full of lights we 'll make god wear sunglasses
you look better than ever
i do n't think mom cares that much that my
that peter left
she seemed upset
what 's wrong with your back
i mean do you need to have surgery on it or what
because those pills you 're taking are for a lot of pain
and you 're going through them quick
are you taking them still
no but i count them
in a sock is n't new you know
i do n't know what that means
what kind of problem
the kind where there is n't really an answer
i still do n't know what that means
i wanted you here so we could have a few months together
maybe everything happens for a reason
something bad to force something good
i do n't know what that means
what kind of problem
the kind where there is n't really an answer
i still do n't know what that means
i wanted you here so we could have a few months together
maybe everything happens for a reason
something bad to force something good
and you told mom today
yes
we 're all dying from the start
i just got picked for advanced placement
you lied to me
i would have lied to me if i thought i 'd believe it
this was all for your sake was n't it
having me here
trying to get me to like you
i never tried to get you to like me
i tried to get you to love me
well congratulations
you fucking pulled it off
what would you do
i 'd build a house
what kind of house
you know what mortise and tenon is
no one 's really said four months is all you have have they
stage four pancreatic cancer
they have n't even pretended to offer treatment
you tell me when would you start eating red meat
can you build a house in four months
i can die trying
good for you
i have n't been touched in years
i 'm sorry i do n't know what that was
a handshake or you know someone pats you on your back through clothes
doctors people who have to touch you
but not by people who want to
no
a friend
your mother
everybody gets touched by someone they love
is n't that weird
i mean i dated a little bit after my divorce for four or five years
six years
i know when my son was younger
maybe when he was ten or eleven even he 'd run up and wrap his arms around me
i aimed high
we just were n't very much alike i guess
i do n't know
i liked your dad more than i liked you
was bankrupt and dead before i was twenty
left you this place
it was in my name so he would n't lose it
he stole it from everyone that deserved it by putting me on title
do you know what i 'd give to have this
forget how i got it
i ca n't afford dirt in this town
i live in riverside goddammitt and you get to piss in the ocean
your kid was down around diver 's cover again smoking pot
i did n't write him up
told him i would n't tell you
thanks for telling me
at least your father tried george
i 'm surprised he has n't left
i have n't forced him to work
i only wet him down once
why would he leave
it 's my day off
i thought i 'd help with the plumbing
i need you to do me a favor
god you look like crap george
i want you to find someone for me
why do you let your dog crap on his lawn day after day
i do n't let him
he just loves to
how many bedrooms will your house have
three
i just wanted to know where mom was
oh
sorry
it 's okay
she needs to be alone i think
because dad left
she 's a little sad is all
i do n't even care if he ever comes back
you should lock your doors
ring the bell before you try the door
did sam call to tell you he would n't be over this weekend
you let him pierce his nose
lock the door behind you
where is he
where he always is
i called everyone everywhere
you just vanished
you could be dead
thanks for waking me up
picking me up
you 're loud today
you 're inconsiderate and absolutely devoid of emotion
you 're the most beautiful woman i have ever known in my life
what
i 'm not talking just physically
even your anger is perfect
i did n't think you 'd know i went missing
you did n't think someone from your office would call and tell me you wrecked the entire building and threatened people with a baseball bat
a blueprint spool
where have you been for a week
four days
i left to think
what did you do with your dog
kurt 's been feeding him
but you ca n't call me while you think
i was n't thinking
look i 'm sorry i did n't think to call you while i thought
i think
i need to talk to you
why would they tow your truck
i was parked in day parking
why call me
i 'm going to tear down the shack and build my house
you 've been saying that for twenty years
while we were dating you said it
there 's nothing anymore to stop me
money
severance pay
and i 'm going to cash in my life insurance policy
how many years did i live with your beams and boards
first in the garage then in the living room
we 're going to do it robin
next year
next year
salvaged floorboards from a house in pasadena
doors from a church in new hampshire
i love those doors
where will you live
the garage
look i was n't serious about you taking sam so you do n't have to get into any actual construction to get out of it
when 's school over
friday
god i hate the thought of him home all day
i 'll be by saturday to pick him up
he does n't want to spend the weekends with you anymore
not for the weekend
for the summer
you and sam are going to live in a garage without plumbing for the summer
the garage is plumbed
i 'll put in a toilet
we 'll survive
thank you for at least sounding sincere
sounding
i need help
he 's cheap labor
one of you would end up dead
at least we 'll have a house to show for it
forget it really
i 'll survive
i want him with me
no you do n't
trust me
hey hey
i 'm married
what was i supposed to do
when you did n't show up saturday i tried to call
your phone is n't working
i do n't have a phone
i drove over and you were gone
i ca n't leave the house
last time you were gone for a week
did you tell him he was spending the summer with me
no
i was going to let you do that
he 's not spending the summer in tahoe
i did say he could go
let 's go
it makes me sad
what
i used to live here
but you hated four out of the five you did
i was here six years
and i only hated two
which
the first and the last
i do n't even like turkey sandwiches
what kind of pizza
sam 's favorite
i was up on the roof this morning tearing it down and it struck me as strong as anything ever has
that i 'm happy today
what have you been before today
it was just that maybe the way the sun struck the ocean the sound of the waves
it was simple whatever it was
then i started thinking about the last time i felt this good
it 's been a long time
do you remember
the only time i can think of for sure i was holding onto sam in the ocean saving him from the waves
you head was pressed against my chest
i could feel your heart racing
and i remember i kissed your hair
we have it on video
was that when
my parents were down for his sixth birthday
i remember that
what is it
i 'm fine
nothing
i 'll drop by your lunch tomorrow
it 's not breakfast yet
i dreamed about your house last night
finished or unfinished
it was perfect george
amazing
it was so real
did n't you once dream you could lick people well though
that was n't a dream
that was sam
oh
with his ear infection
my tongue around the edge of his ear is what cured him
go in there and lick his attitude
the antibiotics were n't working
it 's what i believe george
i 've been wrong a lot in my life
hindsight
it 's like foresight without a future
do you need anything
i 'll go to the pharmacy
i have some demerol at home
no i'm
thanks
i took something
where 's sam
he wo n't use my shower
i do n't get it
you brought your kids
i kind of said that maybe they could do something
help
i 'm sorry
they really wanted to come
i really wanted to come and they wanted to be with me
i do n't think they 'll be too much trouble
i 'll find something that wo n't kill them
or wound
let them keep their eyes and fingers
you 're a good mother
do you need help
i think so
it 's been a while
this was my very first slow dance
tell him how you made me fall in love with you
i smiled at him
watch out for the smile boys
let 's see if you 've gotten any better
oh i 'm worse
much much worse
maybe you should n't come everyday
no
why
i like to be with sam
it 's just that there 's less that adam and ryan can do anymore
i 'd hate to have them bored
i thought we were helping
i can hire workers to help me
nothing is going on with us is it
going on
when i picked you up from the train station
what you said
what did i say
that thing about i was the most you know beautiful person you had ever known
what was that
that was the truth
you 've never said that before
i 'll say a lot of things i 've never said before
it 's habit
it sounded like a pick up line
i ca n't pick you up
i 'm married
you bit my finger
if i were n't married
let 's not do this okay
i need to know
you need to know what
do i still love you
is your back still killing you
i did n't think you 'd come today
i kept thinking about it what you said
i hope you were trying to keep me away fro the sake of me
no
mostly me
peter left me yesterday
left you
no goodbye
no fuck you
no are you in love with george
what did he say
i 'll be in the bedroom
back
neck
back
what
i could die
so could i.
are you going to kiss me
it 's not my back that 's killing me
been thinking
no
it 'll take you like twenty thirty minutes
does alyssa know
nothing
you got any weed
you got the money
what 's your deal with alyssa
do n't even
i'm there
i was n't sure
she would n't even fucking go out with until she was sixteen
i mean that 's not even a rule just her own thing
she like figures things out on her own and then that 's it
he already knows everything about what he ca n't do
you can tell him not to even look at you if you want
i 'm thinking it 's too weird now
it 's just a joke
a stupid joke
i could use the money
he said he heard hammering
who
what are you talking about
i 'm sixteen years old
i 'm underage
how could i possibly threaten you
what the fuck
everything happens for a reason
that 's what my dad said
then you tell me what just happened
the payoff
do you think it 's odd your kids do n't hug you
should i
it would worry me
if i let everything that should worry me worry me i 'd be dead from worry
what would you be if you asked adam and ryan to run in now and hug you
i 'd be you
to shave your chest
we should take a vacation
the biggest waste of time since television
do you remember anything i 've said that was n't negative
i 'd love to drive through new england in the fall
sooner than the fall
after the kids are back in school
lois will stay with them
or we can pawn them off on your parents
i 'm helping george build his house
what
i 've been helping for the last few days
weeks
sam 's working
i told you sam was working
i mean he really is
good
that was the plan
we could n't stand him and george needed help
i ca n't go right now
you ca n't go because of sam
we have n't been away together for three years
what difference does a few months make
you ca n't go with me because of sam
sam is working at something for the first time in his life
once in a while he even talks to me
i want to be around for that
so am i robin
i 'm working at something too
i 'm even talking
do you want to be around for it
you never really trusted me
you live a fabulous life robin
despite you
i never asked for more
that 's the problem
please do n't leave me
where are the kids
sam took them to a movie
i 'll be in the bedroom
i hardly recognize you with a beard
that was my plan
to be hardly recognizable to you as me
i feel in love with george again
thanks for talking about me behind my back
useful in court
are you wearing eye shadow
no
take it off
do it now
if i walk out the door who 's gon na be here tonight for the follow through
you do n't look like you
either do you
i thought i might be able to help but it looks like you have all you can handle
do you like red
do you know anything about building a house
no
i guess i could teach you some things
okay
what are you doing in my room
i did n't go in your room
i locked the door
get out
i locked the door
get out
there were no pg 's
so i just gave them money to play games
can you stay for dinner
depends on what i 'd give up on
the door was open
i do n't know what i 'm doing
i would n't let adam or ryan see you doing it
you 're sure about this
yeah
you could keep it and rent it out
this is what he wants
i read the letter
you read the will
he wants you to keep it
to live in it some day
then maybe this is n't what he wants but this what he was hoping for
maybe it 's what i want
run downstairs and give your dad a hug
why
he 'll be gone for his birthday
queer
what did you say
dad said it first
why do we have to get up and eat with you this early
i just thought it would be nice
i brought a few of my own
someone stop her
adam that 's not true
yes it is
would you stop being ridiculous
your father wants sam home as much as i do
nothing r okay
enough for drinks popcorn and candy
go tell your father we 're eating
dad 's home already
in the bedroom
they ai n't men mae rose
they 're convicts
and nigger convicts to boot
can you say nigger
nagger
no nigger
nigger
that 's my girl
a night in the hole
better make it a week
she 'll be fine
she just had a bit of a shock
is mae rose okay
she 's doing just fine
and the baby
he 's a big one
it 's a boy
well let 's get a look at him
biscuit when you 're done with jangle leg you think you could squeeze me in
thought you 'd never ask
biscuit needs some gravy
i 'm talking about a haircut
cost you a pair of nylons
it 's 1945
it 's a different world now
not for me it ai n't
well you ca n't stay here biscuit
this ai n't no life for a man
any one of these fellas would give their right arm to be in your shoes
i sure know i would
we get the games on the radio sometimes
we played down in jackson yesterday
heard a rumor you 've got a boy up here who can hit the ball a ton
you probably mean ca n't get right
that 's him over there
ca n't get right
that 's the kid 's name
can i talk to him
you can try but you wo n't get too far
why you interested
crawford 's are always looking for new talent
maybe you did n't notice but this is a prison
there are ways around that
right sergeant
yo blocker what 's going on here
kid 's getting out
i got him a pardon
yeah but what about me and ray
i did n't see our names on that pardon
you said you were gon na put in a good word for us
i did claude
i mentioned you
i mentioned you both
but the fact is pardons do n't come cheap
the kid can hit
what can you do
look i am truly sorry about this
i 'd like to help you
but you ca n't
at least the kid 's getting out
is n't this what you wanted
oh no ray
not tonight
spanky 's not happy with you
is spanky here
no but
then what 's the problem
do yourself a favor and find another place where they let you in the front door
but this is where the action is and i have to be where the action is
look when your old lady wanted those alligator shoes did n't i come through for you
ai n't she stepping in style now
yeah
well alright then
what do you think about this new tie
sharp
i look good tonight
and i feel lucky too
yeah
my name 's yvette
sylvia sent me
you look just like she said
she 's alright is n't she
oh she 's fine
she 's just not coming today
why not
she got married last month
married
real nice guy too
trumpet player
they moved down to new orleans
she always said that if you were on the outside
but i 'm not on the outside
i 'm in here
i know she 's sorry she wo n't be seeing you anymore
anyway she wanted me to take care of you
take care of me
you know go to the tonk or whatever
i 'm too old for you
besides i 'm not much in the mood
want me to come back some other time
nice girl like you do n't belong in a place like this
but if you talk to sylvia tell her old claude said congratulations
damn dentures slipping again
everything falls apart when you grow old eh claude
time sure marches on
yes boss
you know i 'm fixing on retiring at the end of the summer gon na try to enjoy what few years i have left
what do you think of this place
it 's one of those new retirement communities down on the gulf
you know i trust you claude
yes sir
i 'll be right back
goodnight mr. wilkins
mr. pike
goodnight claude
cool it ray
you 're gon na get us in a lot of trouble
he 's right gibson
put down the gun and we 'll work this out
claude mind helping me to the bathroom
sure boss
i 'm not your boss
not anymore
i got it
boss
he do n't sound like he 's from round here
i do n't see no wedding ring banks
conjugal visits are for married prisoners only
you think you could make an exception just this once boss
she came all the way down from new york
i do n't need the baptists on my back but i suppose i could issue a temporary marriage license for a nominal fee
craddock
williams
henshaw
banks
here
comfortable
as a pair of fur lined bedroom slippers boss
we 'll see what those slippers feel like after say 24 hours
and if you step down off them bottles -- if one toe so much as touches the dirt -- one of these boys is gon na shoot you dead
let 's see
we need a special man for this job
engagement ring
that 's what respectable folks do
get a job get married start having babies
that 's what you want is n't it
sure it is
i just do n't see any reason to rush into things
damn look at this shirt
i 'll be right back
come on honey let 's get out of here
but i 'm having a good time
did you go see my cousin maynard like i asked you in my letter
of course i did
he said he 'd file an appeal right away
you did n't tell me he was so good looking
yeah that side of the family has all the looks and none of the brains
i hope he do n't mess things up
he seemed like a pretty good lawyer to me
his offices take up an entire floor of that big new building on 125th street and he was using all these words i never heard before
he even offered me a job
a job huh
well that 's nice real nice
you wo n't have to work long
i 'll be back soon enough
after i start work at first federal bank of manhattan i 'll be keeping you in style
everything will get back to normal again
that 's a promise
listen claude maynard wanted to know if he should file the appeal on behalf of your friend too
ray gibson
no no
he 's the reason i 'm in here daisy
for all i know he 's got a record a mile long
i got a better shot of getting out of here on my own
you tell maynard to think about me concentrate on me
understand
sure claude whatever you say
i 've never seen you in here before
that 's because i 've never been here before
i 'm sylvia
what 's your name
ca n't you remember your own name
i know it begins with a c
well mr. c how about buying a girl a drink
two bourbons
i really should n't
i got ta keep an eye on my friend
he looks like he can take care of himself
claude
that 's my name
claude
that 's never happened before
you 're cute
you have any money claude
ten dollars
but i need it to get home
why would you want to go home
it 's so early
do n't i know you
i do n't think so
sure i do
what 's your name again
claude banks
claude banks
how could i forget that
you 've got to remember me
ray gibson
we went to high school together
you went to monroe
that 's right
good old monroe
where they taking us anyway
probably to spanky 's headquarters down at the pier
good i 'm looking forward to meeting this spanky
give me a chance to straighten out this whole mess
i ca n't wait to see that
you slay me man
what are they gon na do to us
you
dine and ditch right
over ten bucks
you 're probably looking at a thumb
a thumb
what do you mean like cut it off
for ten bucks
that include the tip
come on daddy o
you have n't said a word since we started
least you could do is make some friendly conversation
look man i do n't want friendly conversation
i do n't want to be your friend
i 've seen your friends and i do n't like them
i just want to do this thing and get back to new york in time to start my job
start your job
what kind of job
well if you must know bank teller at first federal of manhattan
i 'm responsible for keeping track of hundreds occasionally thousands of dollars
that 's some long green
damn straight it is
i got my own set of keys because i 'm supposed to open up
so if i ai n't there 8 a.m. monday morning there 's gon na be hell to pay
what
nothing
no tell me what 's so funny
i do n't know
bank teller
sounds like ladies work to me
well maybe i should dig around in other people 's clothes for money
it 's obviously been highly successful for you
hey you 'd be surprised what you find in other people 's pockets
just got ta avoid them deadbeat bank tellers
get you every time
i did n't start out to be a bank teller
i was gon na be a ballplayer
even had an offer to play short for the newark eagles
why did n't you take it
the negro league do n't pay so good
and you 're always on the road
that do n't wash with daisy
you gave up baseball to be a bank teller
i ca n't latch on to that
at some point a man 's got to get serious about his future
i 'm sure you have no idea what i 'm talking about
you 're talking about giving up baseball to be a bank teller
bank teller 's just a start
i got plans
real plans
not opening some zoom boom room
this time next year i 'll be a loan officer
a loan officer
that 's right a loan officer
so you mean if i needed some jack to get my nightclub up and running i 'd have to hype some square like you
uh huh
how would i get a loan anyway
you need collateral
like this
that thing
who 'd you steal it from
my daddy gave me this watch
yeah
who 'd he steal it from
my daddy is dead so watch your mouth
you can say what you want about me but do n't be dragging my daddy into it
this watch means the world to me
solid gold
keeps perfect time
looks like a fake to me
loan denied
ah go chase yourself
i 'll take my business elsewhere
and for future reference you are no longer welcome at ray 's boom boom room
there is no boom boom room
when there is you can forget about it
and i swear to god you ever talk about my daddy again i 'm gon na kick your bank telling loan denying ass you got me
oooh
i think i liked you better when you kept your trap shut
maybe we oughta find another place
are you kidding
tell me you do n't want a slice of that pie right over there
i must have left my appetite outside which is where i think we ought to be right now
you mean this sign
the one that says no coloreds allowed
that 's a good question
ray how come we missed the sign
look ma'am we 've been driving all day
we 'd just like to purchase one of those pies and we 'll be on our way
alright
you want some pie
yeah i want some pie
okay then i 'm gon na walk over to that counter and get us some fucking pie
nice meeting you
you 've been here before have n't you
what gave you that idea
oh i do n't know maybe because our lives depend on it i just sort of thought you knew what you were doing
do n't get all agitated on me
i bought a bottle of rum from a couple of dudes i heard 'em talking
let me get this straight
we drove all the way down to klan country 'cause you heard a couple of guys talking
what are you complaining about
it worked out
everything 's cool
now come on let 's head down there and see what 's shaking
we deserve a little reward
reward
there are people down there having fun
i want to be one of them
i want you to be one of them
on monday you can be a bank teller if you want but tonight you 're a bootlegger with a truck full of puerto rican rum and a fistful of cash
hey ray
i 've been looking for you
here i am
guess we better get going huh
still got that ten dollars
well not exactly
see i met this girl
real nice girl
god fearing girl
her name 's sylvia
that jelly you were talking to right here
she 's in a tight spot
her mama needs this operation and they ai n't got the money for it
their church took up a collection but they were still short
so you made a generous contribution
what can i say
when the spirit moves me
that was mighty charitable of you claude
looks like we both got fucked tonight
what are you talking about
while you were upstairs doing god 's work i was getting jack legged by a fool with four threes
you lost all our money in a card game
he even got my daddy 's watch
fuck that cheap ass watch -- i mean how the hell are we gon na get home without any money
we 've still got 36 cases of rum
that 's better than money
i think he 's hurt pretty bad
he 's dead
oh man i 've never seen a dead body before
what do you think you 're doing
the man 's been dead for two seconds
do n't you have any respect
it ai n't here
what ai n't there
my daddy 's watch
this is the dude i was telling you about --
yeah nobody puts 'em away like old what's his name
winston
his name 's winston
come on ray better get winston back to the truck
would you look at that ray
winston up and died on us
hell with him then
if he ca n't share the driving he ca n't ride in the truck
man this is gon na delay everything
spanky 's gon na be pissed
spanky 's gon na be pissed
poor spanky
fuck spanky
what the hell kind of a name is spanky anyway
you 're responsible for this situation
i blame you for everything
if it was n't for you i 'd be home having a hot meal right now
if it was n't for me you 'd be washing up on the beach at coney island right now
i need all my thumbs and fingers for praying and doing good
why do you think they call him jangle leg
somebody just told me he wins the three legged race every year
so
he does it all by himself
this fork is filthy
the fork is the least of your worries claude
what a second you 've been in here since you were thirteen
what about you radio
i kinda lost track of how many people we killed that night
must have been 15 or twenty -- not counting women and children
it was a real bloodbath
all that screaming
pack of lies
do n't listen to him
we did n't kill nobody
we were railroaded
and we gon na prove that
he just blocked it out
nigger 's crazy
he 's the one who did all the stabbing
he 's capable of some heinous shit
how 'bout him down there
no man
i want you to have it
wait up there claude
you give that guy your corn bread and the next thing you know you 'll be ironing his shirts and clipping his toenails
cookie drew me a map to greenville
so
you know what i 'm saying
yeah i know what your saying
and i 'm saying if you made it that far they 'd be watching every train that pulls out of that station
that 's why we wo n't take the train
cookie showed me where there 's a farm house
they got a boat there
what do you know about boats
i bet you ca n't even swim
what i know about boats is they take you to freedom
come on man
i think we can do this
why are you always talking about we
there is no we
there is a me there is a you
but there is no we between us
you want out of this place do n't you
do n't tell me you 're starting to like it here
no i do n't like it here
look around
there 's nothing but ass
male ass
balls and ass
believe you me i 'm getting out of here
what does that mean
forget it
i 'm not gon na forget it
what does that mean
if you 've got a plan i think i have a right to know about it
i told you my plan
getting a map from a chubby chef named cookie
dragging our asses through the swamps in search of some worm eaten boat
that ai n't a plan that 's a vacation for two in the hole
when you 've got a map to new york city you get back to me
no
at least you 're honest for once
so now you want to be my friend
well let me tell you something claude my- shit don't stink banks
you got a lot to learn about friendship
does that mean i 'm in
i do n't think so claude
you 'd just slow me down
we 'd have to stop every five minutes so you could polish your silverware
there 's no way around it you 're soft
what 'd you say
i said you 're soft
do n't call me that
you know i hate it when you call me that
you did it man
you got us out
next stop new york city
new york 's a long way 's off
let 's just keep moving okay
i know these trees all look the same but i 'm getting an awful familiar vibration from this one right here
you sure you know where we 're going
absolutely
the map is very clear
let me take a look at that map
you call this a map
what was cookie smoking when he drew this
cookie did n't draw it
i did
you drew this
i knew you would n't come if i did n't have a map
that gripes my soul man
we 're out here in the middle of nowhere
there is shit nibbling at my balls
do n't tell me you do n't know where we 're going
come on ray time to go
i 'm stuck
do n't mention it
hell you 'd probably be half way to new york by now
i 'm serious man
do n't mention it
ever
keep it together claude
you wake up the man he 'll shoot you for sure
he 'd be doing me a favor
i 'm getting outta here one way or the other
goddamn rats and shit
fuck
all right man just settle down
we 'll get outta here claude
we 'll get outta here real soon
how the fuck are we gon na do that ray
give me back that hot dog
i 'll eat it myself
what am i gon na eat
you can starve to death for all i care
now shut up the game 's about to start
hey man is babe ruth in the lineup today
of course he 's in the lineup
there he goes right there
hey babe
what you 're dealing with here is a complete lack of talent
i 'm sick of watching camp 12 win the championship
every year they get to roast the victory pig and we get dick
this year i want that pig
you want to hit
yo claude
give ca n't get right a shot
him
ca n't be worse than any of these other fools
all right grab the bat
let 's see what you can do
judge must have money riding on the championship
do n't matter who camp 12 puts on the mound
all i know is when this season 's over camp 8 's gon na have pork chops
it 's amazing what ray here can do with a couple of pounds of potato skins and some molasses
so blocker what do you think of our boy
what about us
do n't forget to mention us
we 're like his handlers
he ca n't function without us
god may have given it but claude banks spotted it and nurtured it
damn straight
i expect those pittsburgh crawdads to remember that
crawfords
whatever
it 's a pardon from the governor
let me see that
one of the new kids said they 're farming those acres just north of the swamp
he said he saw a crop duster flying around the place
i 'm not in the mood right now ray
he said they keep it parked out behind the barn
ca n't be that hard to fly a plane
lots of people do it
they 're called pilots
i 'm serious ray
i 'm not in the mood for one of your stupid fucked up plans right now
i do n't see you coming up with any plans
my plan is on his way to pittsburgh right now
that congenital idiot just got himself a pardon signed by the governor thanks to us but we ca n't seem to do nothing for ourselves
do n't you feel a little disgusted right now
crop duster
i ai n't getting in no airplane with you
i 'm finally wrapping my mind around the concept
they threw us in this shithole for life
do n't you get it ray
we 're gon na die here
might as well head up to the cemetery pick a plot and start digging
my daddy died in prison
he gave up hope and hung himself
what you 're talking about is the same damn thing
that ai n't how i 'm going
maybe you 're fooling yourself ray
maybe you 're just a chip off the old block
take that back or we ai n't friends no more claude banks
here 's a news flash ray
we never were friends
we 've just been stuck together for 12 years
it 's been nothing but bad luck since the moment i ran into you
every time i look at you i get sick to my stomach thinking about what my life could have been if i 'd never bumped into ray gibson
better watch yourself claude before you say something you regret
the only thing i regret is the day i met you
well if that 's the way it is
that 's the way it is
then i have nothing left to say to you
you 're a sucker
i 'd have taken that deal
excuse me
are you talking to me
i 'd have knocked you off those bottles put a bullet in your ass and be half way to new york right now
after all these years of blissful silence i almost forgot how annoying the sound of your voice can be
i hope you do n't think i owe you anything
because i do n't owe you a damn thing
i did n't do if for you anyway
i just ai n't no boot licking trusty that 's all
i was sorry to hear about your mama passing
that was five years ago
i know but since we 're talking i thought i 'd mention it
we 're not talking you 're talking and doing too damn much of it if you ask me
what
you sure looked funny running for those pies bullets flying all around you
bullets were n't the problem
that pie was too hot
burned my tongue
you and wilkins sure are getting chummy
you two planning on going steady or something
he 's just a lonely old man
he likes to talk
hey i 'm a lonely old man
i like to talk too
so why do n't we start by talking about what kind of a plan you 're working on
i 'm not working on a plan
you ca n't fool me claude
i know you got something brewing
goodnight ray
what the hell are you doing
do n't touch that car
you sure it was him
some faces you just do n't forget
warren pike 's is one of 'em
i do n't like it i do n't like it one bit
we shoulda taken that car when we had the opportunity
we 'd be half way to new york by now
we 'd be in the hole by now
hey man you 're peeing on my shoe
i know
simultaneously they shake and zip
claude bends down and picks up a bowl of gumbo placing it on a tray next to an identical one
do n't shoot sir
i can deal with this
ray buddy you do n't want to shoot this white man
see you do that they 'll kill you for sure
and it 's not that i like you or anything but i 've kinda gotten used to having you around
he 's got my daddy 's watch claude
i always knew whoever took that watch killed winston hancock
and that was you mr. pike
no i 'm gon na kill him --
no believe me i 'm gon na kill him
i ca n't do it
that 's because you 're soft
gimme the gun
what 'd you say
i said you 're soft
do n't call me soft i hate it when you call me that
why do n't he just tell 'em the truth
he knows nobody wants to hear the truth
nurse humphries was checking my prostate this morning
i got an erection
an erection huh
have n't had one of those in a while
tell me about it
scared me at first
then before i could figure out what to do with it it was gone
imagine my disappointment
sure would like to see the house that ruth built one more time
well ruth shoulda built it a little better
damn thing 's falling to pieces
gon na hurt somebody
what do you expect
it 's almost as old as we are
they oughta tear that shit down and ship them yankees cross the river to jersey
remember what that place looked like on a sunny spring day
more beautiful than any church i was ever in
over to the morgue and up the hill to the cemetery
never thought i 'd admit it claude but you were right
course i was right
about what
you 're the one who said that boneyard 's the only way we 're getting out of here
we 're gon na join all the rest of 'em soon enough
jangle leg biscuit goldmouth poker face cookie radio -- yes sir pick a plot and start digging
just put some mustard on it and eat it
you did n't get ketchup
gimme that damn thing
hell of a day for a ballgame huh claude
hell of a day ray
yankees are on fire
no this ai n't gon na work either
it 's half chocolate half vanilla
so
they 're touching
if you do n't eat that ice cream right now i 'm gon na strangle you until you are completely dead
yeah
you and what army
next thing you 're gon na be complaining about the seats
well if you must know they could be closer
damn i shoulda let spanky johnson drown you in the river when i had the chance
i know you 're not talking to me
i 'm sorry he 's on medication
how you doin'
i 'm all right
you ever done time before
you kidding
i 've been in and out of prison my entire life
mostly in
i 'm hard core
then you wo n't have no problem making the adjustment
you need anything help of any kind gimme a holler
name 's jangle leg
preciate it
claude
soft and supple
like a lady 's
i try to moisturize regularly
what is that
creamed chip beef on toast
except we 're outta beef so i had to improvise
ca n't i get one of those steaks you got grilling back there
those are for trusties unless you got thirty cents or two packs of cigs
you got your own nightclub
well not yet
it 's still in the planning stages
ray my man this steak is like butter
made just for you cookie
how about some steak sauce
no problem
oh boy
why ai n't his pick swinging
why ai n't that pick swinging
too hot huh
well you tell that lazy jiggaboo the state of mississippi ai n't interested in his meteorological assessments
listen up jiggaboo
state of mississippi ai n't interested in your
in your
metropolitan assets
tell him the state of mississippi is only interested in getting this ditch cleared by sundown
state of mississippi wants this ditch cleared by sundown
you got that
he 's from new york city
that one too
new york
that 's up north ai n't it
they 'll find we do things different down here
looks like we got a couple of live ones
how long these boys in for
judge gave 'em the long ride
life huh
they step outta line again we 'll shorten up that sentence real fast
we lost yesterday on accounta the rain
that means we got ta make up for it today so put your backs to it
you heard the boss
let 's move
all in boss
move it out
movin it out boss
maybe i oughta eat your corn bread
my corn bread
oh no my friend
i love corn bread
so it do n't exist
just because it 's in my mind goldmouth do n't mean it ai n't real
everything worth anything starts with a dream
you mean louis armstrong
he 's a good friend of mine
drops by the club whenever he 's in town
that 's right fellas
catch any cab heading uptown
all the drivers know ray 's boom boom room
hey ray
where am i at man
c'mon goldmouth somebody 's got ta watch the front door
hey the dude 's holdin
come on old timer hook the brothers up
hell of a way to get out
heard they burned up in that fire yesterday
i seen the bodies before they sealed 'em up
them fellas sizzled up good
looked like some shit from the x- files
damn that shit 's nasty
so ray and claude got their pardons right
no they did n't get their pardons you dumb shit
if they 'd got their pardons way back then we would n't be burying them today would we
oh right
well why did n't they get those pardons
what do you think about that
i think that old man lost his marbles about a hundred years ago
come on let 's get this over with
why do i get the feeling when you say some time you mean some time
i was already here a good many years when they came in in 1932
1932
that 's like that 's like
sixty five years ago
they always said the farm could n't hold 'em forever
looks like you 're finally free boys
ray 's special recipe
he always had exacting standards where the hooch was concerned
what were they bootleggers
old man wilkins never came out of that bathroom
died right there on the crapper
just like elvis
of course nobody believed ray and claude
it 's alright for a man to cry once in awhile
just do n't make a habit of it
hey willie what was claude 's plan anyway
nothing to it really
claude figured they could steal a couple of bodies from the morgue
they got a couple of crackers working there do n't know their asses from their elbows
then they was gon na set fire to the infirmary and make it look like those bodies was them that got stuck inside
claude figured during the commotion it would n't be too hard to slip onto one of the fire trucks and hang tight until it rolled right on out of here in the morning
mama
rayford
what are you doing here mama
i heard some things so i went to see spanky johnson
he told me what happened and gave me some money to get down here
what happened to your face
do n't worry about that
hey fellas this here is my mama
these are some of my friends
that 's willie there 's poker face radio cookie goldmouth biscuit jangle leg
rayford i wanted so much more for you than this
do n't cry mama
this place ai n't so bad as it looks
sure we work hard but there 's plenty fresh air and sunshine
and you know something else i 've taken to going to church regular
they got services every sunday right there in the mess hall
do n't you lie to me rayford
you still have your daddy 's watch
well this is all i can give you
i wish it was more
is everyone here
hey where 's claude
i do n't see claude
stay calm ray
we 'll find him
claude
has anyone seen claude
he must still be in there
wait for the firemen
it 'll be too late
you ca n't go in there ray
you 'll never make it
i 'm going in for him
he 'd do the same for me
lemonade
i prefer bourbon
i 'm sorry i do n't keep any liquor in the house
well fortunately i carry my own
hunting 's been pretty good on the farm the last few years
it 's one of the perks of the job
if you 're interested tomorrow i could show you some of my favorite spots
you do n't have to twist my arm
say now that gumbo has quite a kick
thank you claude
that 'll be all for tonight
if you do n't mind my saying you seem mighty familiar with your house boy
i believe in treating the convicts with respect if that 's what you mean
respect
well is n't that progressive
if somebody deserves respect mr. pike they receive it from me convict or no convict
what 's going on here
i 'm afraid i 'm gon na have to teach this uppity nigger a lesson in manners
he 's crazy
do n't listen to him wilkins
do you realize what your saying gibson
is there any truth to what he 's saying pike
what difference does it make
natchez was better off without winston hancock
who cares if a couple of no- account bootleggers went to jail for his killing
at least the state of mississippi got 40 years of cheap labor out of the deal
yeah it 's getting late
i could sure use a bath
that 's a real nice watch you got there sir
fancy old thing even plays a little tune
yeah it 's special
they do n't make 'em like this anymore
sure do n't
mind if i ask where you got it
why my wife gave it to me on our anniversary some years back
must have been some time ago
maybe forty years
something like that yes
she give you that scar too
i oughta shoot you for that comment boy
like you shot winston hancock
i 'm gon na work this man 's brains out the back of his head
shoot him wilkins
that watch was the only thing my daddy ever gave me
it meant the world to me
goddamn it wilkins would you please just shoot the nigger
he shoots me i swear i 'll take you with me
i just want to hear you say it
apparently your sister died
jenny
no it says marleen here
appreciate it
anybody else need anything read
hey ray goldmouth do n't believe me
ai n't it so they got trains up in new york city that run under the streets
they 're called subways
a nickel will take you from one end of manhattan to the other
helluva ride too
hey ray you ever been to the cotton club
sure i 've been to the cotton club
it 's pretty sweet
but it do n't hold a candle to the boom boom room
that 's where the real action is
hey ray what 's the name of that nightclub of yours
you mean the boom boom room
that 's it
the boom boom room
sure would like to see that place when you get it up and running
you should have come by last night radio
you woulda had yourself some fun
what 's your name
me
willie long
what are you in for willie
that 's a long story
goldmouth
they say he was born out back behind the shithouse
that 's what they say
you all been here a long time
does n't anybody ever escape from this place
they run but they never get too far
what 's the boom boom room
that 's my joint
the swinginest nightclub in town
last night
what are you talking about ray
i 'm talking about old satchmo nearly blew the roof off the joint
alright willie i think i got everything
i 'll talk to dillard see if i can get up to the infirmary and check up on you
make sure they 're changing your diapers regular
they 'll be sending you up there soon enough
and not just for a visit neither
i slipped in a couple of bottles of my latest batch
help wash down all them pills they 'll be giving you
how you doing
we 're looking for slim
you found him
what 's that some of your bathtub brew
puerto rican rum
see for yourself
where 'd you get this
comes up the mississippi
i can get more
a lot more
i was thinking about going into business for myself but under the circumstances i 'd be willing to take on a partner
i 'm interested
keep talking
all i need is the front money and a truck
i could be back in two three days tops if i had somebody to share the driving
if you fuck me on this one i 'll spare no expense
understood
alright ray you 've got a deal
pick your man and get going
i 'll take the little choirboy if you do n't mind
if i was you i 'd want somebody who can handle himself in a tight spot
i just want somebody who wo n't put a bullet in my back once the truck is full
adrian
you should n't have come here
please get out of my mind
adrian you got ta come back to hell
dad 's sick
he 's sick
yeah he needs souls to live
when you guys left you broke the gates
we got ta get the gates burning again before he dies
he should have thought of that before he denied me my birthright
well maybe you should go back and talk it over with him
how about this
i stay here enjoying my schnapps and you go back
little nicky
adrian i 'm asking you nicely in the name of all that is good release my friends and get in the flask
is this a joke
no
it 's the inner light
and with it we can defeat anything you 've got
now will you get in the flask
absolutely not
i knew it
he 's finally retiring
i 've been waiting on this day for ten thousand years
you work your ass off for ten thousand years hurting people helping others hurt people then you get a decision like that
and he 's dead serious
it 's just such a slap in the face
um excuse me we 're having a private conversation here
yeah get out of here
beat it
that 's what i thought
could you concentrate for five seconds
i am concentrating
where can we rule
what do you think about
earth
we could create our own hell there
you saying we go up there and kill everyone
eventually cassius
but first we corrupt as many as we can so that when we do destroy them
... their damned souls will be ours
it 's our time brother
let the sin begins -- that was a good one
well we must get people sinning if we want to fill up our new hell
how are things going down at city hall
i lowered the drinking age to ten
brilliant
this is so much fun
i never want it to end
why should it end
who 's gon na stop us
no
do n't do it
ta da
so what time is my brother expected back
noon
but what about the cash
can we keep it or what
sure why not
it is awfully hot down here
how do you manage to stay so cool
weed lowers the body temperature
i read that
in uh
er science magazine
and give you a good buzz
or maybe it will trap me inside for all eternity
uh
no it wo n't
oh nicky i 've missed you
come on out and say hello
urr
uggg
errr
i 'm calling you out brother
keep it up and i just might make you my queen for a night or two
you want a queen
got one right here
oh
my
god
i ca n't believe you 're here
welcome
can i just tell you i am so excited right now
so excited
all these good people have totally been led astray
show him central park
she goes to parson 's right
i would totally love to go there
but i hear it 's really hard to get in
the home of eternal damnation house of hades h.e. double toothpicks
maybe try the opposite of that
okay can i just ask you something
what do you know about your mom
my brothers told me my mother was a mountain goat
which would explain my chronic halitosis
a mountain goat
that 's really sweet
my mom was n't a goat
try an angel
an angel
unh huh
which would make you half angel
wow
what
what did she look like
well she was about six three only spoke portuguese and had really long grey hair
how come you 're not older
angels do n't get any older son
where did you meet my father
it was a long time ago at some heaven and hell mixer
hello
yes he 's here with me now
i do n't know if he 's hot he 's my son you perv
i 'll call you back
oh my god i will call you back goodbye
that was my friend michelle she says hi
well tell her i said hi back
i got ta help her
i got ta help dad
i got ta help everybody
yeah you do
but how can i win
adrian is stronger and smarter than me
stronger yes
smarter definitely
but you have something he does n't have
a speech impediment
what is it
i 'm not a hundred percent on that
god said when the time comes you 'll know what to do
well nice meeting you jenna christa
would it be okay if i called you mommy
it would be so okay
well mommy get me to the big apple cause i 'm gon na rock that town like a hurricane
you 're already there
what 's nicky doing down there
trying to capture his brother in a flask and preserve the balance of good and evil on earth
did you just talk
no
where is he
he 's late
he 'll be here
just keep your cool kid
my name 's beefy
i 'm an old friend of your father 's
he 's asked me to help you out
i just need to find my brothers and be on my way beefy
it 's not gon na be easy
your brothers can possess people
so they probably wo n't look like themselves
you have to be suspicious of everyone
okay bro this jig is up
just get in the bottle
just slide right on in there
it 's not me moron
oh
sorry
makin friends already
it 's freezing up here beefy
you 're on earth now kid
gon na have the same physical needs and limitations a human has
we 'll stop by k mart
get you some warm clothes
i also have this odd pain in my mid section
kind of a hollow feeling
that pain is hunger
so far so good
now what
put it in your mouth
hey
popeye 's chicken is ass kickin
it sure is
now eat it up
you 're gon na need your energy
i got energy up the ying ying
let 's get cracking
from now on
i 'm just going to avoid all moving metal objects
great
now your father gave me some deposit money for a nice pad on the upper east side
but i misplaced it
you 'll be alright
go on
big day tomorrow
do n't forget to do that sleep thing i told you about
got ya
is it okay if i do the sleep thing
this is intense
and it happens every day
sometimes twice
i got ta tip my hat to you people
look it 's okay for me to shit the street
but you got ta use a toilet
okay just point me in the right direction next time
come on there 's like ten million people in this city and the clock is ticking
well let 's rock and roll
you have the power to change the cola in that can into any other liquid -- engine oil bat 's blood moose piss
you just have to release the evil within you
release the evil
i 'm just saying there 's wickedness in you
i can tell from your snores
we had the greatest afternoon of my life until adrian made me tell her she had a heart shaped ass
maybe you love her
but what do i know
i 'm baked out of my mind
i seem to be in trouble beefy
the shit has hit the fan kid
take a look
i did n't murder anybody
look
you were really high
things happen
i was with valerie i swear
this is adrian 's work
i 've got to find him
i think you 're looking at him
this is baloney
he superimposed your head onto scarface
what 's with all the whoo whoo noises
everything 's fine pop
last time you said that the renaissance happened
please pop just go back to your room
can i take him with me and have sex with his head
sure pop
whatever you want
i 'm sorry
after careful consideration i regretfully have to decline
c'mon man i 'm just asking for one superbowl ring
in exchange for eternal damnation of your soul
you 're too nice of a guy for me to want to do that to you mr. marino
you did it for namath
yeah but joe was coming here anyways
just go back to earth and enjoy your records and the hall of fame and the beautiful family and all that
this is bullshit man
i 'm gon na win the superbowl this year with or without you
now you 're talking
knock knock
yes jimmy
check one two
check one two
put it back on my head
i 'm falling apart here
he 's got til midnight tonight nicky
you get your ass back up there
you save your father
nothing dad
just re arranging the furniture
cassius did n't i tell you to stay out of your brother 's mind
now everybody sit down
hey dad i 'm almost finished laying down my monsters of metal compilation tape
i really think it 's a masterpiece
okay kid we 'll listen to it later
this was a very difficult decision because i have three wonderful sons
i mean adrian so smart so ruthless
and cassius so strong so tough
and nicky so
so
do n't worry about coming up with anything
it 's cool
such a sweet boy
but after much thought and careful consideration i 've decided that the ruler for the next ten thousand years is going to have to be
me
i mean
tough break
the important thing for the stability of our rule is to maintain the balance between good and evil
and i do n't think any of you are ready for that responsibility yet
you need the wisdom that comes only with the passage of time
now that was an experience
you are only coming through in waves
that line blows my mind every time
definitely
i do n't care what kind of mood you 're in at the start of that song
when it 's over that mood has been altered
wow
great shit
what 's next
well i thought that after messing with your head i 'd give you a little kick in the keester
who is this metal lick a
metallica dad
come on
i was just playing with you
you 're a good devil dad
and i also happen to be a jets fan
nicky the worst thing that could happen on earth is you get killed in which case boom you end up back here
are you telling me i have to go to earth and kill my brothers
no
this ca n't be happening
son just do your best
that 's a train son
do n't stand in front of them
well i guess i 'm going to have to take a mulligan on this one
please nicky get back up there
try to hurry
dad adrian 's got the whole city after me
he 's always a step ahead
what am i gon na do
what are you gon na do
look at me nicky
i got no legs i got no hips i got one ear
uh i 'll do my best dad
do you have any advice at all for me
i ca n't hear you nicky
i ca n't hear anything
you came through nicky
i came through for you mom and the butterflies dad
you 're back in hell now kid
there 's no butterflies here
if you want butterflies you need to be on earth
what about you and grandpa and everyone in hell
nicky i let my butterflies die once upon a time and it 's never stopped hurting
that 's right you heard me holly
i 'm still in love with you
listen i got down low
your mom 's got up high
you take care of the middle
i will dad
but in the words of motley crue this will always be my
home sweet home
i 'm lucky to get away with just the head boobs right
coulda been much worse
that 's what i 'm thinkin
you know i was the one who created hell
i know your wickedness
i started slow though
for years i was just giving people hot foots
actually you can give all the credit for hell to my first wife she was the inspiration
she was an ugly one too
one day she asked me if i wanted super sex
i said i 'll take the soup
you know what was in hell when i came down here cassius
it 's stanley sir
nothing
no mountains
no castles
looked like a giant parking lot
it was n't even called hell
what was it called sir
boogerland
that 's nice grandpa
why do n't you just enjoy the fishing
i ca n't enjoy anything
i go fishing
i catch nothing
i go to orgies i catch everything
hey
your father wants to see you and your brothers in the throne room
okay but jimmy when the house is rockin do n't forget the knockin
nothing 's getting through that
the fire is solid as a rock
we got ta get this bad boy burning again
ideas
so go get 'em jimmy
i 'm just a demon nicky
i do n't got devil blood in me
i 'd last two minutes up there with your brothers
you 're not saying it 's up to me
i 've never been to earth
i 've never even slept over at some other dude 's house
you 're the spawn of satan
you got it in you
you were gone ten seconds
what happened
i got hit by a big light that was attached to a lot of metal
no wonder your uncle 's so weird
i got ta say this cake tastes a little funny
his name is andrew
i know that guy
of course you do tommy tune
sounds like our devil dance actually worked this time
bout time
there 's our man
mr. sleepyhead must have some major ties to the dark side
what 's with that guy
got ta be one of his disciples or something
yo man i think that devil guy just got ripped off
should we wake him up
yeah
you do it
did you check out the dragon mouth
the dark prince is here
look who 's back from the dead
six six six pick up sticks
that 's a big pass elton john
we 're going to see ozzy play at the meadowlands right now
wanna come nicky
schnapps
peppermint
alright
this do n't look good
ca n't beefy use his penis powers to get us out of this
which way did he go
that way
what 's ozzy trying to say there
absolutely nothing
the blizzard always came straight with his messages
but wrap your minds around this one
come on
one more time
not again fellas
it kind of hurts
no thanks
i 'm afraid i would n't be able to give ozzy the focus he deserves
whoa that chick must be the real deal then
later on
see ya fellas
so i was driving to work today and some bozo in a cadillac cut me off
oh that 's terrible reege
so i followed him
you followed him
i followed him all the way downtown and when he gets out of the car i reach under my seat and pull out an aluminum bat
you keep a bat under your seat
recently yes
so i run up behind this guy and start bashing his brains in with this bat and it made me feel happy
did you ever see the untouchables
yes great movie
i was deniro
please
you got to
all right
you got ta kill yourself
i 'll just go to heaven
hello
you smell like coconuts
it 's comptoir sud pacific
makes me feel like a hula girl
which is kinda what i 'm going for
wanna come in
no thanks
i 'm looking for a girl named valerie who also smells like coconuts
valerie doran
two floors up one window over
thanks much
good luck with the genital tucking
i do n't need luck
i 'm good
adrian
andrew
you got the wrong window again man
oh
sorry andrew
valerie
that was amazing
thanks so much
you did n't have to do that
that 's okay
i get messed with all the time and when i saw him doing that to you i just lost it
i hate when people take advantage of tourists
it ruins it for the rest of us
you think i 'm a tourist
i 'm sorry
i just assumed
your accent maybe
where are you from
the south
really
yeah
deep south
she laughs along with him not sure why
why are you laughing
i do n't know but i like it
say
your glasses are nice
they make your eyes look sparkly and big
it 's fun to look at them
my dad 's an optometrist
my dad 's in hell and he 's falling apart
i 'm sorry
it 's really tough when your parents get older
if i do n't save him i do n't know what i 'm gon na do
well i 'm sure a nice southern boy like you will figure something out
here have a popeye 's
this drumstick ai n't for beatin it 's for eatin
that 's alright
i already ate lunch
i actually would n't mind getting a gelati
could i come with you to getting a gelati
if you want to
want to
a million angry octopus people could n't hold me back
octopus people
uh it 's a deep south expression
it 's freezing my hands
it 's not that cold
here let me wrap it
this town is really going to hell lately
so what part of the city do you live in
i have an apartment
i do n't remember exactly where
my dog knows though
you have a dog
what kind
i 'm not sure
i 'd ask him but he 's uptown talking to his contacts
so you 're saying make all pants with a drawstring then heavier set gals do n't have to feel humiliated by telling their waist size in front of the whole store
basically yeah
wow
maybe you should make drawstring socks for gals with fat ankles
you know what 's nice about you
you just seem happy being yourself
you do n't try to act cool
thanks much
you know what 's nice about you valerie
what
your juicy heart shaped ass
what was that
i
i do n't know why i just said that
i meant to say that
hey
nicky
oh my god
stay right there
what were you thinking coming here
i 'm not sure but it did n't involve getting blinded with poison
valerie
are you dead
no
what are you doing
i think i 'm floating
why would you be floating
i do n't know
maybe it 's because of your sweet voice
am i supposed to not be freaked out right now
because i am
look just because you 're floating does n't mean i 'm gon na forget about you giving me the finger
that was n't me
i was being possessed by my brother adrian
he 's the one who call you a gross pig
what do you mean possessed
remember when i told you my dad was in hell
yes
well that 's because he 's the devil
and he wants to keep his throne for another ten thousand years
which is fine with me but not with my brothers so they broke out of hell causing my dad
... the devil
... to decompose
and i love my dad very much
so i came to earth to save him but then crazy eyes stole my flask and i met you and
well my dog tells me i just might be in love with you
you got ta believe me
you got ta believe in the butterflies
okay i do
get back up here
i never thought i 'd ever see ozzy live until he was dead
please tell me you like metal
mister crowley what 's inside of your head
do n't do it
i have to valerie
nicky
that was cassius
where 'd a sweet southern boy learn to fight like that
from my dad 's side of the family
do me
i love you
i love you
hello friend my name is nicky
i understand you 're seeking a roommate as per your advertisement in the village voice
would it be possible for me to fill the slot
uh do n't you want to know what the rent is
yes
what is rent
eight hundred split down the middle
tuesdays and thursdays i rehearse with my scene partner so the living room will be off limits
off limits
right
and as far as household items we can share the soap but we 'll split the cost 60/40
cause the person who physically goes out and buys the soap should n't have to pay as much as the other guy
are n't you boiling in that outfit
no
it 's like eighty degrees in this hallway
you from the south
yeah
the deep south
why is that funny
i do n't know
and sorry man but no dogs allowed
that just hurt a lot
i 've always wanted to kill someone
can i do it
hey
see something you like my man
yes
i would like my flask back
you callin me a thief my man
no i 'm just calling you
a guy who has my flask
and if that is your so called flask how would i have it unless i was in fact a thief
i do n't know
okay now you gone and done it
you done messed with my business bitch
sir i would prefer if you did n't raise your voice
it 's making my muscles tighten
i 'm a sandman
i cut up a sandman yesterday
they said i 'd never get him
but i cut him up good i did
i feel sorry for you boy
for me
better feel sorry for yourself sandman
no for you
how old are you billy
fourteen
fifteen
your days are running out
how long can you last
a year
six months
what happens when you 're sixteen and you go green
nothing will happen
i make the rules as i go
cubs do what i say
always have
always will
i got cathedral and i 'll never let go
no cubs over fifteen billy
ever heard of a cub with a green flower
you 'll leave cathedral then billy when you 're on green because they wo n't let a green stay here
if you try to stay the young ones will gut rip you apart
shut up
shut up your damn mouth
are you too startled
am i too removed from your ken
i 'm neither machine nor man
but a perfect fusion of the two
and better than either
no human sculptor could match this greatness
do n't you agree
all right -- what are you
your turn
where do you think we came from
from
from
from
we were sent here and you know it
others have been sent here
where are they
hiding
hiding
yes
hiding hiding
where do we go
where do we go from here
is that the wind
not yet
you must hear my birds sing
you know about sanctuary
i know you do
you have to help us
you do n't have a choice
it is n't your decision
tell us
never a pair
i have never had a pair
where do you send them
you 're a beautiful pair
answer the question
do you know how long all this will last
not thirty years
or thirty thousand years
but thirty thousand years
and you 'll be part of it
ages will roll
ages
and you 'll be here
the two of you
eternally frozen
frozen
beautiful
there must be somebody else up here
i ca n't believe that he 's --
let me sculpt you and i will show you where the others have gone
that 's better
how do you want us
nude
imagine a pair
it 'll be all right
how do you want us
up there
all right
now you keep your bargain
wait for the wind
wait and hear the birds sing over you
we 're ready
how did they get in here
regular storage procedure
the same as the other food
the other food stopped coming and they started
what other food
fish and plankton sea greens and protein from the sea
it 's all here -- ready -- fresh as harvest day
fish and plankton sea greens and protein from the sea
and then it stopped coming and they
came instead
so i store them here
i 'm ready
and you 're ready
it 's my job -- protein plankton grass from the sea
it 's a real privilege sandman
thanks
i thought you 'd be older
i expected a red
i am
your own work
and i did it myself right on there
you are here
i could n't believe it when they told me
what are you doing
turn this way
no no
not you
you
you should 've seen me take my last runner
perfect
i backed him up against a residence pool and when he terminated
his hand
so now you 've seen him
what 's the difference awake or asleep
open your eyes once idiot
it 's not every day that a sandman son is born
i 'm telling you francis -- that 's him
maybe maybe not
what 's the difference
come on logan let 's get out of here before everybody finds out
had enough
even the alarm did n't wake him
you need a lift
let 's go to arcade and celebrate
your alert successor
logan-6
has anyone ever broken in to where the babies are
not in my time
why
just wondered
what happens
dunno
flameout maybe
whatever happens you can bet it 's final
but who would want to find out
but you do n't know you just say what everyone says
one for one
one for one
well why not
that 's exactly how everything works
how else could the city stay in balance -- you have a better idea
no but at least i wonder sometimes -- instead of doing that one for one song of yours
you sound like a sleepteacher with a stuck tape
well the minute you get a better idea you can stop wondering
you know logan -- you wonder a lot
too much for a sandman
did you ever see francis-8
i never even visited nursery before tonight
when you wonder it slows you up -- you know
i do n't know what makes you so curious
you have any idea who his seed mother was
of course not
i 'm curious not sick
you should have been with us in nursery daniel
i 'm positive i recognized him --
come on
i do n't want to miss the filing in
there 'll be some i know tonight i think
now there 's a few who could have been his seed mother
only a few
you 're just not trying
who invited you
i 'm in my party mood
that was a great shot you made
yes
but you look a little rusty to me -- what were you doing wondering
i just might look in on new you 483 myself
you
why
you 're already beautiful
no -- it 's that last runner -- someone in 483 was trying to help him
what the hell took you so long
did you ever see anybody renew
i think you 've been skulling out too much
first nursery and now stupid questions
did you
of course
anybody we know
look
why do n't you get into the water
you need it
more than i do
i 'm fine
see you
at carousel tonight
what 's going on logan
it has nothing to do with you
what are you talking about
i saw you let a runner go
i saw you logan
tell me
why did you do that
i did n't do anything francis
they 've made us believe that
why did you do that
what 's your name
i 'm mary 2
where do you live mary
here
why are n't you in nursery
i 'm very smart
when do you go up
i never go upstairs
you 're a nice old lady
what 's wrong available
please
no
please
no
you mean not here -- that 's it
you 're a private available but particular
do n't worry
there 's no one here but me
and you
no
just no
you prefer women
no
well then
nothing
i felt sad i put myself on the circuit
it was a mistake
sad
what made you sad
a friend of mine went on carousel tonight
now he 's gone
yes
probably he was renewed
he was killed
killed
why do you use that word
is n't it right
is n't that what you do
kill
i never killed anybody in my life
sandmen terminate runners
who brought you
nobody
i felt sad
i put myself on the circuit
you felt sad
what 's your name
jessica
you 're beautiful
let 's have sex
no
later
no
but you put yourself on the circuit
i thought i had to do something
and
i changed my mind
and now
curious
about what
how a sandman lives
let 's have sex
i thought you were curious
not about that
i 'm listening
i 'm afraid to tell you
i 'm not armed
well
why is it wrong to run
you should n't even think such things
and you picked a strange person to say them to --
i suppose
but what if you want to live
so
do what everyone does
try like hell for renewal
but if you 're one of the misfits
that 's where i come in
i did n't say that i would run
i just
are you a 5 or a 6
six
i go red next year
you 're years away
i do n't know why you 're thinking of these things much less talking about them
want to try
what quad do you live in
k.
you 're sure you do n't want to try
you could have called me yourself
but i was n't sure you 'd come
here i am
shall i come in
i could n't get you out of my mind
i 'm the most beautiful woman you 've ever seen i suppose
maybe
sure
thanks
but i have the choice
of course
then it 's still no
where did you get that
a runner gave it to me
and then you killed him right
i let him go
believe me
i do n't
speak to your friends for me jessica
please
please
what friends
i do n't have much time
i never heard of a sandman running
ever
and i never heard of sanctuary
are you here to help me
what do you need
what 're you going to do
that 's tomorrow
i wish i could help you
maybe you 'll think of something
i wish i knew what you think i know
if you did know you 'd tell me
of course --
if you trusted me you 'd know
we 're coming to arcade
shall we relive together
a runner
cathedral
a woman
you 're not going are you
why not
maybe she 'll help me
you wo n't
you 'd better stay here
i 'd rather be with you
that 's nice
they 're like beasts
wild
maybe they 're angry because they 're grown in meccano breeders
instead of what
nine months inside a woman we 're all raised the same but most of us do n't become cubs in cathedral
some people say children need human mothering
insane
nurseries are better than any mother could be
i 'm only telling you what i 've heard
have n't you ever wondered what your seed mother was like
uh uh
i have
when did you begin to question lastday
i do n't remember exactly
except i was a green
what would you like to relive logan
let 's see -- how long has it been
just follow -- no matter how it seems
but what is this -- why
the cubs
when they 're flying on muscle there 's no way to catch up
without the dazzle they 'd just go past us -- -- too fast
muscle
i do n't know that one
exactly four steps now
let me lead you
now to the right
it 's narrow here you 'll have to get behind me
how will they know we 're coming
they 're watching us now
they 'll let us in when they 're sure
will you take me with you
why jessica
you 're still a green
how do we know this is the right way
it 's the only way
what do you suppose this was
some kind of breeding pens
i suppose
they say people used to breed animals fish anything
to eat of course
ycch
to kill things and then eat them
it must have been a savage world
i 'm afraid
it 's brighter there
besides we ca n't go back
i do n't know what 's going to happen to us logan but -- are you glad you did n't kill him
it does n't make any difference anymore
you 're really one of us now are n't you
you knew that i was n't before did n't you
why did you stay with me
i wanted to
and you
what made you kill sandmen
i had to
i did kill
for the first time in my life i killed
because you felt like a runner did n't you
i guess so
i know i felt something i never felt before
and i did n't like it
not a bit
i 'll tell you one thing
sanctuary better be worth it
that 's the last place for me to live now
for us
what 's that
it feels like breath
it makes everything move
your hair is moving
and yours
i hate outside
i hate it
we 'll be all right
we will
do you think everything 's going to turn to ice
i doubt it
do n't ever let go
i wo n't
it all seemed to make sense until box
do you think he was telling the truth
maybe we 're the first ones to get through
maybe sanctuary is near now
another protected place
it could n't be outside
how would anyone know
even if we find it -- we can never go back
you 're right
it must be near now
we 'll find it
thirty thousand years did n't last very long did they
what does it mean
the lifeclocks have no power outside
you can have any woman in the city
what do you really want
you know jessica
... but i still have the choice
of course
then the answer 's yes
i have never seen a face like that before
it must be the look of great age
whoever he was he was terribly old
yes do you think that 's why he looks so sad
they all have names and numbers on them
i wonder what they are
beloved husband
beloved wife
what can all that mean
there 's a sanctuary
there is
you want there to be one
that does n't
there has to be
i know it exists
it has to
no there does n't
not really -- just so many want it to exist
so many who do n't want to die
want it so much that a place called sanctuary becomes real
but it does n't exist
it never existed
just the hope
you 're wrong
it has to be
it just has to be
what are we promising him
what can we possibly give him
he asked if we would bury him when his time comes
we ca n't
we 're going back
to what
i 'm going to try and tell people what we 've seen and --
you 're lying
you 'll never have the chance to tell anybody anything
you 'll be killed the moment you 're seen
do you expect me to let things go on without trying to change them
things wo n't change
you know that
we can live here together logan
have a life as long as his
together
things change
you want to go back to kill is that it
now you 'll want to kill your own
kill sandmen
killing 's all you ever
jessica
listen to me
listen to me
the lifeclocks made me kill francis
they make people die or be killed every day
if i did n't try and destroy that
i could n't live here or anywhere
do you understand
i want to be alive and with you that 's all i want
beloved son
so people stayed together for that feeling of love
they would live and raise children together and be remembered
i think i feel that way logan
can we be that way
yes
you and i jessica
and sanctuary
sanctuary is the right to live
nothing more
but nothing less either
beloved husband
beloved wife
what does that water do
it 's part of the hydrogalvanic system
the ocean tides are changed into energy somehow
is it inside the city
of course
i do n't know where
i just took them for granted
it 's our only chance
yes cats of course
what else could they be
cats
of course each one has his own name too
but there are so many of them
do you know each one separately
yes indeed everyone
actually they all have three
the naming of cats is a difficult matter
it is n't just one of your holiday games
you may think at first i 'm mad as a hatter when i tell you a cat must have three different names
an ordinary name and a fancy name
that 's two
do you want to guess what the third one is
and
and how were you grown
inside your mother
yes
are you sure
mother and father said so
you know
we 'll have to bury him
what 's that
they 're put into the ground so they can be visited by the living
i 'll make the arrangements
at least it 's over
of course
that 's settled then
but just you remember your promise
we 'll remember
but that 's a long time off
come with us
where are you going
goodbye
oh my
hello sandman
hello
do you want to see doc
we do n't get many sandmen
i think we 've only had one other since i 've been here
a sandman can get as sick of his face as anyone else
where 's the doctor
i like your face
would you mind if doc took a picture
i 'd like him to give your face to somebody else
it 's all right with me
is he here
my name 's holly
holly 13
in ancient times they said my number was unlucky
do you believe in luck
no -- look i 'm in a hurry
how long have you been living here
for as long as i can remember
what kind of place is this
just a place i suppose
who knows
where are they
dead
they 're dead
and buried
they 're beautiful
may i have one too please
no -- i 'm sorry
it 's not possible
it is n't fair
i 'll give you one of my favorite cats
a jellicle cat
jellicle cats have cheerful faces jellicle cats have bright black eyes they like to practice their airs and graces and wait for the jellicle moon to rise
i 'm sorry but i do n't have anything to give you
what 's beyond this place -- do you know
no no no
did your mother or father ever mention another place
never never ever
nothing
may we stay here for a while
we 'd like to rest
of course you can stay
this belongs to the people
are you ready to put him in
not yet
all right
we 're leaving
what a pity
i was hoping you 'd be here to bury me
to a city with thousands and thousands of people
alive
thousands and thousands
as many as my cats
more
many more
and all alive you say
i know
we 're going to try and get in this way
i do n't think you can make it
oh
i did so look forward to seeing all those people
i 'm sorry
yes
can you make it back
oh my
i 'll try
break in scanners report intrusion identify
logan-5
francis-7 authorized duty quadrant
intrusion accidental
clear logan-5 and francis-7
i do n't know who you are
i 'd like to thank someone
it does n't matter who we are
follow the tunnel to the end
will there be someone to tell us where to go from there
someone will follow
when you come to the lock he will tell you how to go on the other side
jessica may go with you as far as the lock
no
jessica goes back now
take her back
now
go on back
back outside jessica
well
how do you like it
i do n't know
the cheeks maybe
look a little --
cheeks
cheeks
right
too much you think
too little
too little
too little
okay wait for me
no -- just there -- on the first level
do n't look for us
we 'll see you
you do n't seem quite sure jessica
can you do it
will you
you 're not contagious are you
i do n't think so
good
you up for a drive
where to
hey lanie i heard you were out of it for a while too
just goin' up'ta tops
maybe the ten pin
sheila'll be at tops
sure what 's wrong with that
okay
what 's happenin
they 're comin with us
pile in
you okay man
what
you okay
what 's wrong
pete
you okay
yeah
i 'm okay
you okay
sure i 'm okay
do you always sleep here
in this room
both of you
this is our bedroom
you 're a musician
yes i thought my wife
i like to remember things my own way
what do you mean by that
how i remember them
not necessarily the way they happened
why not
it kept going off for some reason
false alarms
do you own a video camera
no
fred hates them
no
maid
relative
no one of us is always here to let the maid in
nobody else has a key
we 'll see that the patrol of the house is doubled
i do n't know if i want to stay here
i do n't feel safe
how 'd the camera get so high like that
and smooth
almost no movement back and forth i mean
like you 'd get if it was hand held
right
this just glided along
might be a good time to try using it again
anybody else have a key to the house
we 'll keep a watch on the house
as best we can
if anything else happens you 'll call us
you do n't remember being awakened
it looks like you were aware of someone
or something
has anyone made any threats to either of you recently
or not so recently
what a fuckin job
his or ours
ours ed
we 've got pete dayton 's prints all over this place
you know what i think
what 's that ed
there 's no such thing as a bad coincidence
i was here yesterday
yeah i remember
how would you like to take me to dinner
i do n't know
okay then i 'll take you to dinner
where 's your phone
i have to call another taxi
over there
i want more
me too
can i call you
yeah
call me at home
i 'll give you the number
okay baby
hello
it 's me
hi
i ca n't see you tonight
okay
i have to go somewhere with mr. eddy
sure
i think he suspects something
we have to be careful
i miss you
pete
me too
i 'll call you again
hello
meet me at the starlight motel on sycamore
i 'll be there in twenty minutes
okay
you like it
no honey
it was part of the deal
what deal
he works for mr. eddy
what 's he do
he makes films for mr. eddy
pornos
yeah
how 'd you get in with these fuckin people
pete
do n't
how 'd it happen alice
it was a long time ago
i met someone at this place called moke 's
we became friends
he told me about a job
in pornos
no
a job
i did n't know what
he set up an appointment for me to see a man
you liked it
if you want me to go away i 'll go away
so should i call andy
andy
that 's his name
andy
our ticket out of here
yeah
call him
i 'll set it up for tomorrow night
you 'll meet me at his place at eleven o'clock
do n't drive there
take a bus
make sure no one follows you
his address is easy to remember
it 's 2224 deep dell place
it 's a white stucco job on the south side of the street
i 'll be upstairs with andy
the back door will be open
that leads into the kitchen go through the kitchen to the living room there 's a bar there
at eleven fifteen i 'll ask andy to fix me a drink
when he does you can crack him in the head
okay
okay
lemme call him now
make sure he 's not already busy tomorrow night
okay
set
why are ya goin' so early
'cause that 's how long it 's gon na take baby
what if andy tips off mr. eddy
are you kidding
i 've got so much on andy it is n't funny
what about tonight
whatiya gon na do about mr. eddy tonight
i 'm not goin' home tonight
i 'm goin' somewhere else
to a girlfriend 's house
but we still have a coupla things to take care of
oh yeah
what else
are you my man
yes
are you gon na be a man about this pete
you got him
alice i
you all right
we killed him
you killed him
alice
look at all this shit
i know a fence
he 'll give us money and get us passports in exchange for this and the car
we can go anywhere
alice
andy who is that guy
i do n't know his name
he 's a friend of dick laurent 's i think
dick laurent
yes i believe so
but dick laurent is dead is n't he
he is
i did n't think you knew dick
how do you know he 's dead
i do n't
i do n't know him
dick ca n't be dead
who told you he was dead
wonderful
wonderful to see you pete
how are you
feeling good arnie
ready to get to work
wonderful pete
really wonderful
alotta people pete
alotta people are gon na be very happy
mr. smith has been waiting for you and mrs. trueworthy
can you take care of mr. smith now
sure
mr. eddy 's called every day
can i call him to come in
sure arnie
bring 'em on i 'm ready
better
arnie called this morning while you were sleepin
they miss you pretty bad down at the garage
i told i m you still had a fever
okay
thanks
nice to know they ca n't seem to get along without ya
yeah
you really do n't remember the other night do you
what night is that
the night before you showed up in the slammer
goin' out with these clowns for a while
do ya good
hey
sit down a minute
what 's up
sit down
never saw him before in my life
did you tell the police this
we 're not saying anything about that night to the police
we should all forget that night
what happened to me
please tell me
no
a cell that was supposed to be occupied by an inmate named fred madison
the wife killer
yes
his condition
what do you mean
his physical condition
same as always
pete takes care of himself
have you made any charges against him
no
then he 's coming home with his mother and me
all right
but you see our predicament
legally we ca n't hold him but he may be able to help us
perhaps later
for now he 's free to leave
just rest easy pete
you 're gon na be okay
are you hungry honey
i 'll fix you something
where 's pete
out in back
you talk to him
no
here he comes
we saw you that night pete
you came home
your friend sheila brought you here
one of the guards must have leaked it
what 's the word on the street
you just gon na let him go
we 'll get a tail put on him
now mack what 's the situation
i 'm not entirely certain captain
you 'll have to see for yourself
that 's not fred madison
no sir it 's not
who is it
i could n't say sir
captain henderson
yeah mack
captain
this is some spooky shit we got here
i would n't know how
you say you have n't seen your son since the day before yesterday
when he went to work right
what about yesterday
he did n't come home
i want to see him
yes and we need to talk to him
if we can
mel let 's get peter in here
pete can you tell us now anything about this
pete what happened to you
no
i do n't feel so good
i would like some aspirin
coming up
we know that
who was the man
who is it
he wo n't give his name
what is this rogoff
i do n't know yet
who is this man
he 's just been fingerprinted and i 'll run these blood tests right away
we 'll find out soon enough
he 's not madison
not even close
i examined madison last night marshall
he had a headache
a headache
i did a routine once over and gave him a sleeping pill
i 've never seen this man before
neither have the guards
i do n't think he 's in the system
what did you say
i
i did n't say anything
i wo n't ever tailgate
do you know how many fuckin car lengths it takes to stop a car at 35 m.p.h.
no
six fuckin car lengths
that 's about a hundred and six fuckin feet mister
you were following ten feet behind me
if i'd had to stop suddenly you would have hit me
i want you to get a driver 's manual and i want you to study that motherfucker
and i want you to obey the god damn rules
fifty fuckin thousand people were killed on the road last year
cause of fuckin assholes like you
tell me you're gonna get a manual
i 'll get a manual
and study it
fuckin a
what 's your axe
tenor
tenor saxophone
do you
tone deaf
did you use the alarm system since we were here last
the first night
not the last two
something wrong
my
my head
headache huh
too much sun i guess
you want to come in
still got forty- five minutes outside if you want it
no no
i want to go in
what 's bothering you madison
the pain is getting worse
i need more aspirin
i ca n't give you anymore
i 'll talk to the doctor
what is it
aspirin
fly head
i got ta have more aspirin
the doctor said not to give you anything
you can see him in the morning
but my head
we 've met before have n't we
i do n't think so
where was it that you think we 've met
at your house
do n't you remember
no no i do n't
are you sure
of course
in fact i 'm there right now
what do you mean
you 're where right now
at your house
that 's absurd
where 's alice
alice who
you do n't mind that i 'm not coming tonight
what are you going to do
i thought i 'd stay home and read
it must be from a real estate agent
maybe
good book huh
huh
oh yeah it is
same one you were reading the other night
what night
when you did n't come to the club
oh
oh yeah
no
this is a different one
i called you know
called
when
from the club
you did n't answer
i must have fallen asleep
i was asleep when you got home was n't i
you were asleep when i got home yes
i had a dream about you last night
yeah
you were in the house
calling my name
but i could n't find you
you 're up early
that dog woke me
i lay there for a while then decided to get up
who the hell owns that dog
what 's that
another tape
yes i just found it on the step
do n't you want to watch it
i guess so
we 've got to call the police
all right
so
two detectives are coming out
what was that
what
on the tape
there was something else on the tape
no i do n't remember anything
it looks like i
but
i do n't remember
why would anyone do something like this
where would you feel safe
i do n't know
maybe a hotel
i 'll make sure the alarm is set from now on
but that does n't solve the problem
who is doing this
and why
i thought you were getting me a drink
just a minute
let 's go home
but
now
we 're leaving now
i did n't want to come here in the first place
it was a long time ago
i met him at this place called moke 's
we
became friends
he told me about a job
what job
i do n't remember
anyway andy 's okay
he 's got some fucked up friends
i told you to stay in the car
why
what is it
why did you make me wait out here
i thought there might be somebody inside
was there
no
of course not
what happened
somebody givin you trouble
no it 's nothin'
i 'm all right
because if anybody 's givin you trouble pete i can take care of the problem
like that
no no
it 's okay mr. eddy
i mean it pete
like that
thanks mr. eddy
whatiya need
just the regular tune up
i want you to ride with me
somethin' does n't sound right
okay
lemme clear it with
it 's okay with arnie
come on let 's go
give that a try
all right
beautiful
smooth as shit from a duck 's ass
let 's take a ride
whatever you say mr. eddy
sorry about that pete but tailgating is one thing i ca n't tolerate
i can see that
i 'll bet you know how many car lengths it takes to stop at
say 45 m.p.h
eight nine car lengths
a hundred and sixty two feet
at sixty
fifteen car lengths
about two hundred and seventy feet
what 'd i tell ya
thanks mr. eddy
no
thank you
i 'll be bringin the caddy by tomorrow
you like pornos
pornos
yeah
give ya a boner
no thanks mr. eddy
suit yourself champ
okay
well i 'll see ya then
you will
i 'm leavin the caddy like i told you
think you 'll get a chance to give her a once over today
sure
sure mr. eddy
you gon na pick it up later or tomorrow
if you think you can finish it i 'll be back later today
it 'll be ready
you 're my man pete
hello
hey pete
how ya doin'
who is this
you know who it is
mr. eddy
yeah
how ya doin' pete
okay
you 're doin okay
that 's good pete
look
it 's late mr. eddy
i
i 'm really glad you 're doin' okay pete
you sure you 're doin' okay
everything all right
yeah
that 's good pete
hey
i want you to talk to a friend of mine
i do n't think so
where was it that you think we 've met
at your house
do n't you remember
no
no i do n't
we just killed a couple of people
what
what 's goin' on
great question
in the east
the far east
when a person is sentenced to death
they 're sent to a place where they ca n't escape
never knowing when an executioner will step up behind them and fire a bullet into the back of their head
it could be days
weeks
or even years after the death sentence has been pronounced
this uncertainty adds an exquisite element of torture to the situation do n't you think
it 's been a pleasure talking to you
i missed you
yeah
yeah
what are you guys doin'
guess we 're goin' over to the ten pin
you want some company
sure
why have n't you called me
sorry
i
what else about that night
did anything happen
you really do n't remember
no
i told you
it was weird
whatiya mean sheila
i do n't want to talk about it
sheila
no
i really do n't want to talk about it
what do you want
nothin'
you want to go for a drive
i do n't know
come on
get in
why do n't you like me
i do like you sheila
where 'd you come from
i 've been here
you were lookin right at me
i was
yeah
i did n't know you cared
come on
sheila what is it
what are you doin' here
you 've been fucking somebody else have n't you
sheila
you fuck me whenever you want
you do n't call
tell me who she is
hey
sheila
what 's the bitch 's name
look sheila
i 'm sorry
you're sorry
go home sheila
sheila
stop
fuck you
fuck you
conway 's gone again
run out
listen to this
from gainsford
let me have it
aboard the s.s. manchuria
last night conway seemed to recover his memory
kept talking about shangri- la telling a fantastic story about a place in tibet
insisted upon returning there at once
locked him in room but he escaped us and jumped ship during night at singapore
am leaving ship myself to overtake him as fearful of his condition
wrote down details of conway 's story about shangri la which i am forwarding
lord gainsford
where 's the girl
miss stone
she 's remaining in her room
she is n't feeling very well
now please go on without me
i eat very little
well there 's certainly nothing wrong with that meal
thank you
not even a radio
it 's always been a source of deep regret but the mountains surrounding us have made reception almost impossible
what about those men we met this morning
yes
those are our own people
they never venture beyond the point where you were met this morning
it is much too hazardous
two years
yes
i beg your pardon brother
what did you say you were hunting
fossils
fossils huh
i 'm a paleontologist
a what
a paleontologist
oh i see
i have here a discovery that will startle the world
it 's the vertebrae from the lumbar of a megatherium,[4 found in asia
well what do you know about that
found in asia
uh huh
when i get home i shall probably be knighted for it
knighted
you do n't say
do you mind if i take a look at it
not at all
good morning lovey
i beg your pardon
i say good morning lovey
good morning
i did n't care for sister last night and i do n't like lovey this morning
my name is lovett alexander p.
i see
i see
well it 's a good morning anyway
i 'm never conversational before i coffee
wait a minute
is it a good morning
say we 're supposed to be traveling east are n't we
why of course
yes
well it looks to me as if we 're traveling west
that 's ridiculous
is it
it certainly is
look here
any child knows how to tell direction
any child
i do n't care where the child is in the air on the earth or in the sea
if you face the rising sun your right hand is the north and your left hand is the south
i always get it twisted because i 'm left handed
oh really
yes
well you just reverse it
your left hand is what difference does it make what hand you are
the north is the north
uh huh
all i know is the sun rises in the east and we 're going away from it
now you 're irritating and absurd
he might have lost his way
of course
that 's what i told them last night
you ca n't expect a man to sail around in the dark.[5 during this george has been looking around he rises
yes
and who is he
how 'd he get there
do you suppose we stopped someplace during the night and changed pilots
left us here to rot
that 's what they 've done
heroes of the newspapers
all right all right
keep quiet
where are they
do you see them
yes
do you think they 're cannibals
mr. barnard i do not like this place
i definitely do not like this place
will you stop squawking
look at me
look at what they gave me to wear
you never looked better in your life
as soon as our clothes are cleaned they 're going to give them back to us lovey
some layout they got here
did you get a load of the rooms
you could n't do better at the ritz
all the conveniences for the condemned if you ask me
do n't mind lovey
he 's got the misery
mr. conway i do n't like this place
i do n't like it
it 's too mysterious
how about you lovey
come on
let 's you and i play a game of honeymoon bridge
i 'm thinking
thinking
what about some double solitaire
as a matter of fact i 'm very good at double solitaire
no kidding
yes
then i 'm your man
come on toots
and say honey you look a million per cent better
wholesome kind of and clean
you take a tip from me and do n't you ever put that stuff on your face again
why it 's like hiding behind a mask
ha ha who are you to be talking about a mask
what do you mean
you 've been wearing a mask ever since we met you
have i
it 's very strange you know
you 've never told us anything about yourself
who are you anyway
why do n't you take your mask off for once
certainly not
believe me it 's no fun
when you fellas picked me up at baskul they 'd been on my tail for a year
the police
uh huh
did you ever hear of chalmers bryant
that 's too bad
i got a half million shares
my whole foundation
and now look at me
colossal nerve you have sitting there and talking about it so calmly you the swindler of thousands of people
you know that 's what makes the whole thing so funny
a guy like me starts out in life as a plumber an ordinary everyday slew footed plumber and by the use of a little brains mind you he builds up a gigantic institution employs thousands of people becomes a great civic leader
and then the crash comes and overnight he 's the biggest crook the country ever had
you are a thief sir and a swindler and i for one will be only too glad to turn you over to the police when we get back
yes
sounds like a stall to me
i do n't know why i associate with you mr. barnard or mr. chalmers bryant or mr. embezzler or whatever your name may be
just call me barney
barney
why should i
never
we have nothing in common
hmmpf barney
what effrontery
okay lovey
and this trip to the valley
i ca n't imagine why i 'd allow you to drag me down here
why we do n't know anything about these people
we 're not even armed
they 're very nice people except that they 've got horns
horns
there you are
this does n't obligate me in any way
then the bears came right into the bedroom and the little baby bear said oh somebody 's been sleeping in my bed
and then the mama bear said oh dear somebody 's been sleeping in my bed
and then the big papa bear he roared and somebody 's been sleeping in my bed
well you have to admit the poor little bears were in a quandary
i 'm going to sleep in my bed
come on lovey
they were in a quandary and
come on lovey
why
why come on all the time
what 's the matter
are you going to be a fuss budget all your life
here drink it up
are n't you having any fun
where was i
in a quandary
oh my is n't that pretty
what is it
plumbing
everything modern
i 'm going to run pipes all through the village
charming chap
nice puss to meet in a dark alley
well that 's that i guess
wonder what 's happened to fenner
what are we going to do
well there 's nothing we can do until the morning
it 's better than freezing to death down below is n't it
i 'll say
that 's what i say
what do you say to a rubber of bridge
i saw some cards in the other room
not for me thanks
no i 'm too weary
chalmers bryant
bryant 's utilities that 's me
yeah
i though you ran this joint
mr. chang high lamas or low lamas do we get the porters
you see
you get the idea
from this reservoir here i can pipe in the whole works
oh i 'm going to get a great kick out of this
of course it 's just to keep my hand in but with the equipment we have here i can put a plumbing system in for the whole village down there
can rig it up in no time
do you realize those poor people are still going to the well for water
it 's unbelievable
think of it
in times like these
say what about that gold deal
huh
gold
you were going to
oh that
that can wait
nobody 's going to run off with it
say i 've got to get busy
i want to show this whole layout to chang
so long
do n't you take any wooden nickels
all right
i say will you have a cigarette
no
say you 're an american are n't you
say listen will you go and annoy the rest of your playmates
let me alone
hey what 's happened to you
nothing
why
why you look beautiful
look honey
we run the pipes through here and we connect with the main water line here
pipes
where are you going to get pipes
oh that 's a cinch
i 'll show them how to cast pipes out of clay
if you want me to
sure sure
do n't you worry
i 'll take care of you
cave eh
where
over by that hill
and mine 's conway
how do you do
you 've no idea sir how unexpected and very welcome you are
my friends and i and the lady in the plane left baskul night before last for shanghai but we suddenly found ourselves traveling in the opposite direction
where is your mad pilot
he must have had a heart attack or perhaps the fumes
when the plane landed he was dead
you will need suitable clothes for the journey
it is not particularly far but quite difficult
thank you
and the wine excellent
i 'm glad you like it
it 's made right here in the valley
it 's three thousand feet practically straight down to the floor of the valley
the valley of the blue moon as we call it
there are over two thousand people in the valley besides those here in shangri la
who and what is shangri la
you
goodness no
so there are others
oh yes
who for instance
in time you will meet them all
for a man who talks a great deal it 's amazing how unenlightening you can be
there are some things my dear conway i deeply regret i may not discuss
you know that 's the fourth time you 've said that today
you should have a record made of it
shall we go inside
i should so like to show you some of our rare treasures
by the way what religion do you follow here
we follow many
to put it simply i should say that our general belief was in moderation
we preach the virtue of avoiding excesses of every kind even including the excess of virtue itself
that 's intelligent
we find in the valley it makes for better happiness among the natives
we rule with moderate strictness and in return we are satisfied with moderate obedience
as a result our people are moderately honest and moderately chaste and somewhat more than moderately happy
how about law and order
you have no soldiers or police
oh good heavens no
how do you deal with incorrigibles
criminals
why we have no crime here
what makes a criminal
lack usually
avariciousness envy the desire to possess something owned by another
there can be no crime where there is a sufficiency of everything
you have no disputes over women
only very rarely
you see it would not be considered good manners to take a woman that another man wanted
suppose somebody wanted her so badly that he did n't give a hang if it was good manners or not
well in that event it would be good manners on the part of the other man to let him have her
that 's very convenient
i think i 'd like that
you 'd be surprised my dear conway how a little courtesy all around helps to smooth out the most complicated problems
one moment
you say the high lama is the only one who can give us any information
the only one
and he can arrange for the porters to take us back
the high lama arranges everything mr. conway
well then he 's the man i want to see
will you come along
yes
i 'm afraid it does
shall we have another
no thanks
not tonight if you do n't mind
charming is n't she
yes charming
your brother seems quite fascinated by her
why not
she 's an attractive young woman
young
she arrived here in 1888
she was 20 at the time
she was on her way to join her betrothed when her carriers lost their way in the mountains
the whole party would have perished but for meeting some of our people
amazing
she still does n't look over 20
when is she likely to grow old in appearance
not for years
shangri la will keep her youthful indefinitely
suppose she should leave it
leave shangri la
that 's not likely
you could n't drive her out
no i mean about her appearance
if she should leave the valley what would happen
oh she 'd quickly revert in her appearance to her actual age
it 's weird
chang how old are you
age is a limit we impose upon ourselves
you know each time you westerners celebrate your birthday you build another fence around your minds
you must prevail upon him not to attempt the journey
he could never get through that country alive
i ca n't let him go alone
it 's suicide
what do you want
i 've offered you some warm broth
i thought perhaps-
you get out of here
if any of you men think you can come busting in here-
please calm yourself
you 'll soon be well if you do
i do n't need any advice from you
get me a doctor
i 'm sorry but we have no doctors here
no doctors
that 's fine
that 's just fine
please let me help you
sure you can help me
you can help me jump over that cliff
i 've been looking and looking at the bottom of that mountain but i have n't got the nerve to jump
you should n't be looking at the bottom of the mountain
why do n't you try looking up at the top sometimes
do n't preach that cheap second- hand stuff to me
go on beat it
beat it
of course the porters will be very well paid that is within reason
i 'm afraid that would n't help
you see we have no porters here
no porters here
no
what exactly do you mean by almost any time now
well we 've been expecting this particular shipment for the past two years
we were just going to bury him when you came along
pardon me
in that event we better make arrangements to get some porters immediately
some means to get us back to civilization
are you so certain you are away from it
as far away as i ever want to be
oh dear
oh yes
there is a tribe of porters some five hundred miles from here
that is our only contact with the outside world
every now and again depending upon favorable weather of course they make the journey
how can we get in touch with them
in that respect you are exceedingly fortunate
we are expecting a shipment from them almost any time now
the high lama is the only one from whom any information can come
do n't believe him bob
he 's just trying to get out
a fine trick
smart are n't you
what a pack of lies you told us about those porters
of course the minute they arrive we can make arrangements to leave
if they take us
but you knew very well you 'd tell them not to
now my dear boy
you should n't
you 've been lying to us ever since we got here
apparently it 's worked with some people
perhaps it 's because they lack the courage to do anything about it
but not me chang
you 're up against the wrong man
i 'll get out of here if i have to blow this fantastic place into the valley
i 'll get outporters or no porters
it 's all your fault
it was all arranged until he spoke to you
why ca n't you leave us alone
do you mean to tell me you want to leave shangri la
i 'll die if i have to stay here another minute
i 've waited a long time for this chance to go and you 're not going to stop me now
if i have to i 'll go alone
it was i who bribed the porters
if it were n't for me you 'd never get out
i thought the porters had instructions from the high lama not to take anyone
the high lama
who pays any attention to him
the porters laugh at the high lama
all they want to know is how much gold he will give them
well i gave them more gold
i 've been stealing it for a year
i 'd do anything to get out of this place
to get away from that high lama the one who calls himself father perrault
why he 's been insane for years
father perrault is dead
he 's dead
that 's fine
you wo n't see me shedding any tears over him
oh george you must take me with you
are n't you afraid to leave
you do n't want to look like an old woman do you
old woman
chang told you that did n't he
yes
i thought so
he tells everyone i 'm old
he wants them to stay away from me
he ca n't stand it when anyone comes near
he 's punished me for every minute i 've spent with george
if it were n't for him i would have been out of here long ago but he always stops me
six months ago i tried to escape and he locked me in a dark room
i nearly went crazy
look at me mr. conway do i look like an old woman
is this the skin of an old woman
look into my eyes and see if these are the eyes of an old woman
you 're lying are n't you
no mr. conway i 'm not lying
what reason could i have for lying
the chances are that we 'll never come out of that horrible trip alive but i 'd rather die out there in a snowstorm and be buried alive than to stay here one more minute now
are you taking me
yes of course
certainly
come on
i trust you have been comfortable at shangri la since your arrival
personally i 've enjoyed your community very much
but my friends do not care for this mystery
they are determined to leave as soon as
it 's astonishing and incredible but
what is it my son
you 're the man chang told me about
you 're the first who two hundred years ago you 're still alive father perrault
sit down my son
you may not know it but i 've been an admirer of yours for a great many years
that conway seemed to belong here
in fact it was suggested that someone be sent to bring him here
that i be brought here
who had that brilliant idea
sondra bizet
oh the girl at the piano
yes
she has read your books and has a profound admiration for you as have we all
of course i have suspected that our being here is no accident
furthermore i have a feeling that we 're never supposed to leave
but that for the moment does n't concern me greatly
i 'll meet that when it comes
what particularly interests me at present is why was i brought here
what possible use can i be to an already thriving community
we need men like you here to be sure that our community will continue to thrive
in return for which shangri la has much to give you
you are still by the world 's standards a youngish man
yet in the normal course of existence you can expect twenty or thirty years of gradually diminishing activity
here however in shangri- la by our standards your life has just begun and may go on and on
but to be candid father a prolonged future does n't excite me
it would have to have a point
i 've sometimes doubted whether life itself has any
and if that is so then long life must be even more pointless
no i 'd need a much more definite reason for going on and on
we have reason
it is the entire meaning and purpose of shangri la
it came to me in a vision long long ago
i saw all the nations strengthening not in wisdom but in the vulgar passions and the will to destroy
i saw their machine power multiply until a single weaponed man might match a whole army
i foresaw a time when man exulting in the technique of murder would rage so hotly over the world that every book every treasure would be doomed to destruction
this vision was so vivid and so moving that i determined to gather together all the things of beauty and culture that i could and preserve them here against the doom toward which the world is rushing
look at the world today
is there anything more pitiful
what madness there is what blindness what unintelligent leadership
a scurrying mass of bewildered humanity crashing headlong against each other propelled by an orgy of greed and brutality
the time must come my friend when this orgy will spend itself when brutality and the lust for power must perish by its own sword
against that time is why i avoided death and am here and why you were brought here
for when that day comes the world must begin to look for a new life
and it is our hope that they may find it here
for here we shall be with their books and their music and a way of life based on one simple rule be kind
when that day comes it is our hope that the brotherly love of shangri la will spread throughout the world
yes my son when the strong have devoured each other the christian ethic may at last be fulfilled and the meek shall inherit the earth
yes of course your brother is a problem
it was to be expected
i knew you 'd understand
that 's why i came to you for help
you must not look to me for help
your brother is no longer my problem
he is now your problem conway
mine
because my son i am placing in your hands the future and destiny of shangri la
for i am going to die
i have waited for you my son for a long time
i have sat in this room and seen the faces of newcomers
i have looked into their eyes and heard their voices always in hope that i might find you
my friend it is not an arduous task that i bequeath for our order knows only silken bonds
to be gentle and patient to care for the riches of the mind to preside in wisdom while the storm rages without
do you think this will come in my time
bob
i think i hear motors
colonel wait a minute they may be here now
say george get down on that field and guide those planes in when they get here
yes
and be sure that none of the natives get in
yes
hello
colonel
the power house they 've blown it up
the planes ca n't land without lights
come on
we 'll burn the hangar
that will make light for them
the next time you 're in wild country like this keep in touch with the british consul
aha very good freshie.[3 very good
you 'd better put his name on the list and make out a report later
just what i needed too
you
just this once bob
i feel like celebrating
just think of it bob a cruiser sent to shanghai just to take you back to england
you know what it means
here you are
do n't bother about those cables now
i want you to drink with me
gentlemen i give you robert conway england 's new foreign secretary
hurray
how i 'm going to bask in reflected glory
people are going to point to me and say there goes george conway brother of the foreign secretary
do n't talk nonsense
give me the bottle
hello freshie
did you make that report out yet
yes bob
did you say we saved ninety white people
yes
hurray for us
did you say that we left ten thousand natives down there to be annihilated
no you would n't say that
they do n't count
you 'd better try to get some sleep bob
just you wait until i 'm foreign secretary
ca n't you just see me freshie with all those other shrewd little foreign secretaries
you see the trick is to see who can out talk the other
everybody wants something for nothing and if you ca n't get it with smooth talk you send an army in
i 'm going to fool them freshie
i 'm not going to have an army
i 'm going to disband mine
i 'm going to sink my battleships i 'm going to destroy every piece of warcraft
then when the enemy approaches we 'll say come in gentlemen what can we do for you
so then the poor enemy soldiers will stop and think
and what will they think freshie
they 'll think to themselves something 's wrong here
we 've been duped
this is not according to form
these people seem to be quite friendly and why should we shoot them
then they 'll lay down their arms
you see how simple the whole thing is
centuries of tradition kicked right in the pants and i 'll be slapped straight into the nearest insane asylum
do n't worry george
nothing 's going to happen
i 'll fall right into line
i 'll be the good little boy that everybody wants me to be
i 'll be the best little foreign secretary we ever had just because i have n't the nerve to be anything else
do try to sleep bob
huh
oh sure freshie
good thing sleep
oh stop it
the bloke up there looks a chinese or a mongolian or something
george what are you going to do
i 'm going to drag him out and force him to tell us what his game is
what are these people
i do n't know
i ca n't get the dialect
he 's dead
dead
what is it
see that spot
yes
that 's where we were this morning
he had it marked
right on the border of tibet
here 's where civilization ends
we must be a thousand miles beyond it just a blank on the map
what 's it mean
it means we 're in unexplored country country nobody ever reached
hello george
cigarette
thanks
i suppose all this comes under the heading of adventure
we 've had plenty of it the last few days
it 's far from over from what i can see
this place gives me the creeps hidden away like this no contact with civilization
bob you do n't seem concerned at all
oh i 'm feeling far too peaceful to be concerned about anything
i think i 'm going to like it here
you talk as though you intend on staying
something happened to me when we arrived here george that well did you ever go to a totally strange place and feel certain that you 've been there before
what are you talking about
i do n't know
you 're a strange bird
no wonder gainsford calls you the man who always wanted to see what was on the other side of the hill
do n't you ever want to see what 's on the other side of the hill
what could there be except just another hill
in any event i 'm not curious
at the moment it seems to me we should be concerned about getting home
i 'd give anything to be in london right now
of course you would
if ever we get out of this place the thing for you to do is to take that job with helen 's father
what do you mean if we should get out
did i say if
that 's what you said
well i mean
what 's on your mind bob
you talk as though we 're going to have trouble getting out of here
george i 've been putting things together
do you notice the resemblance between those natives and the pilot
and why did those clothes materialize so conveniently when they met us at the plane
chang himself just said that they never venture beyond that point
what brought them there
unless it was to meet us
chang 's first question was about the pilot
uh huh
there must be some connection between the plane and this place
they must have deliberately brought us here
why bob
what reason could they have for doing a thing like that
that 's what 's on the other side of the hill
well i heard that if you want a man 's wife she 's yours if he 's got any manners
nothing about the porters yet
porters
good heavens bob we 've been here two weeks and we have n't found out a thing
well we have n't been murdered in our beds yet george have we
i 'm afraid the porters are just a myth
i guess we never will know why we 're here or how long we 're going to be held prisoners
shhh
george what do you think you 're doing
let me go bob
george come back
chang
chang
chang
let me up
let me up
all right
sorry george
george you 're behaving like a child
you have n't opened your mouth in two weeks
i do n't see that there 's anything to say
i said we 're getting out of here
back to civilization
i made a deal with the porters
they brought in a load of books or something and they 're leaving tomorrow at dawn
they 're waiting for us five miles outside the valley
come on get your things together
where 's your top coat
you ca n't leave george
why not
what 's going to stop me
you must n't
you 've got to stay here now
stay here
what 's the matter with you bob
you 've been acting strangely ever since we came here
i 've never seen you like this
why ca n't we leave
what 's stopping us
something grand and beautiful george
something i 've been searching for all my life
the answer to the confusion and bewilderment of a lifetime
i 've found it george and i ca n't leave it
you must n't either
i do n't know what you 're talking about
you 're carrying around a secret that seems to be eating you up
if you 'll only tell me about it
i will george
i want to tell you
i 'll burst with it if i do n't
it 's weird and fantastical and sometimes unbelievable but so beautiful
well as you know we were kidnapped and brought here
well i i really do n't know what to say
except that you must be completely mad
so you think i 'm mad
what else can i think after a tale like that
good heavens bob things like that do n't happen today
we 're living in the twentieth century
so you think it 's all nonsense huh
i think you 've been hypnotized by a lot of loose brained fanatics
why i would n't believe it if i heard it in an english monastery
why should i swallow it here in tibet
how do you know the things they told you are true
did they show you any proof
i do n't need any proof
i knew there was a reason i hated this place
i 'd give half my life to fly over it with a load of bombs just for what they 've done to you
how do you know the things they told you are true
did they show you any proof
all this talk about the lamas being hundreds of years old
how do you know
did you see their birth certificates
i ca n't believe it bob
a bunch of decrepit old men sit around and dream about reforming the world
and you bob conway two feet on- the ground conway want to join them
it 's horrible
is that all my story meant to you
what else could it mean to me
it 's obviously a lot of bunk
then you 'd better go george
this is no place for you
it 's no place for you bob
think of what 's waiting for you
do you want to stay here until you 're half dead
until your mind starts corroding like the rest of them
please george
i do n't want to talk about it anymore
you 've got to talk about it
what about me
you said they stole that plane to bring you here
i did n't want to come
you owe me some responsibility
i 'm tired of owing you things
you 're free to go
go ahead
it 's that girl that girl has twisted and turned
enough
never mind the girl
well why do n't you go
look here bob ever since i can remember you 've looked after me
now i think you 're the one that needs looking after
i 'm your brother bob
if there 's something wrong with you let me help you
oh george
besides i i do n't feel like making that trip alone bob
george you could n't possibly stay here could you
i 'd go mad
george i may be wrong i may be a maniac
but i believe in this and i 'm not going to lose it
you know how much i want to help you but this is bigger stronger if you like than brotherly love
i 'm sorry george
i 'm staying
well i ca n't think of anything more to say
goodbye bob
george are you sure of the porters
about their taking care of you i mean
oh yes
it 's all set
maria made the arrangements
maria
yes the little russian girl
what 's she got to do with it
she 's going with me
you ca n't take her away from here
why not
because you ca n't
do you know what will happen to her if she leaves shangri la
she 's a fragile thing that can only live where fragile things are loved
take her out of this valley and she 'll fade away like an echo
what do you mean fade away like an echo
she came here in 1888
this would be funny if it was n't so pathetic
why she is n't a day over twenty
you 're wrong george
i 'm not wrong
she told me so
besides she would n't have to tell me
i 'd know anyway
i found out a lot of things last night
i 'm not ashamed of it either
it 's probably one of the few decent things that 's ever happened in this hellish place
you say the porters are waiting for us
yes
the clothes
yes everything
what about the others
i 've already asked them
they 're afraid to make the trip
we 'll have to send an expedition back after them
come on
we 're wasting time
lucky thing for me you snapped out of it too
you saved my life
i never could have made it alone
what was that
was saying
ca n't you shut up
must you go on babbling like an idiot
bob ca n't you get them to wait for us
they 're leaving us farther behind every day
there 's nothing that would suit them better than to lose us but we must go on
come on
target practice again
one of these days they 're going to hit us
as long as they keep on aiming at us we 're safe
come now child
where did you come from
i 'm alexander p. lovett sir
why are n't you registered through our office
where were you hiding
hiding
oh no
hunting i was in the interior hunting fossils
this morning i looked up suddenly
i know and a war broke out right over your head
no
that 's not possible
if we had landed we all would have been awakened
of course
we never left the air
i know i did n't sleep the whole night long
that fellow got on at baskul
what 's he doing
where 's he taking us
he may be a maniac for all we know
good
what if he refuses
we 'll smash his face in
that 's what we 'll do
brilliant
can anyone here fly a plane
huh
i give it up
but this not knowing where you 're going is exciting anyway
well mr. conway for a man who is supposed to be a leader your do- nothing attitude is very disappointing
at the mercy of a mad pilot
we 'd be eternally grateful if you
oh please
i hope you 're not going to run away this time
my name 's sondra
hope you 'll forgive me for
you know each time i see you i hear that music
what is it
oh you mean my pigeons
was this your idea
yes
hold this pigeon
you suggested my being brought here did n't you
what gave you the idea i 'd fit in
that was easy
i read your books
oh you 've read my books
you do more things
what have my books got to do with it
i saw a man whose life was empty
a man whose life was empty
oh i know
it was full of this and full of that
but you were accomplishing nothing
you were going nowhere and you knew it
as a matter of fact all i saw was a little boy whistling in the dark
a little boy whistling in the dark
do you realize that there is a british cruiser waiting at shanghai smoke pouring out of its funnels tugging at its moorings waiting to take mr. conway back to london
do you know that at this minute there are headlines shrieking all over the world the news that conway is missing
does that look like a man whose life is empty
yes
you 're absolutely right
and i had to come all the way to a pigeon house in shangri la to find the only other person in the world who knew it
may i congratulate you
i really only brought you here to show you my pigeons
do n't worry about the pigeons
from now on you can put flutes on my tail and bells on my feet
there are so many questions i 'd like to ask you i hardly know where to begin
i 'll help you
to begin with you 'd like to know what i 'm doing here
whether i was born here
thank you
well i was almost born here
it took place in that wild country beyond the pass
my father and mother were in a party of explorers who got lost and wandered around for a year
when chang found us only father and i were alive
but he was too weak to climb the pass
he died on the way
i was brought up here by father perrault himself
father perrault
i envy you
i talked to him last night
yes i know
father perrault
of course i ca n't quite get used to this age thing
beautiful
i 'm waiting for the bump
bump
when the plane lands at shangri la and wakes us all up
ouch
you see it 's not a dream
you know sometimes i think that it 's the other that 's the dream
the outside world
have you never wanted to go there
goodness no
from what you tell me about it it certainly does n't sound very attractive
it 's not so bad really
some phases are a little sordid of course
that 's only to be expected
why
oh the usual reasons
a world full of people struggling for existence
struggling why
well everybody naturally wants to make a place for himself accumulate a nest egg and so on
why
you know if you keep on asking that we 're not going to get anywhere
and do n't ask me why
i was just going to
it 's the most annoying word in the english language
did you ever hear a child torture his parent with it
mother 's little darling musn't stick her fingers in the salad bowl
why
because it is n't lady- like to do that
why
because that 's what forks are made for darling
why mother
because mother read it in a book somewhere and if mother 's little darling does n't take her fingers out of the salad bowl this instant mother 's going to wring her little neck
would you like to wring my little neck
i 'd love it
why
i 've thought about it for years
i knew you 'd come
and i knew if you did you 'd never leave
am i forgiven for sending for you
forgiven
you know when we were on that plane i was fascinated by the way its shadow followed it
that silly shadow racing along over mountains and valleys covering ten times the distance of the plane
it was always there to greet us with outstretched arms when we landed
and i 've been thinking that somehow you 're that plane and i 'm that silly shadow
that all my life i 've been rushing up and down hills leaping rivers crashing over obstacles never dreaming that one day that beautiful thing in flight would land on this earth and into my arms
it would serve you right if you were left behind
how could i know that a war was going to break out right over my head
right over my head
oh my word
i tell you those chinese were pouncing on me from every direction
i had to get into these ridiculous clothes in order to escape
could n't you arrange to make a little less noise
i tell you we 're going west and shanghai is east of here
be quiet
fenner 's the best pilot in china
he knows what he 's doing
it 's fenner
what do you want him to do
i do n't know
i 'm a paleontologist not a foreign secretary
what is it
mountain grass
it 's good too
here have some
i 've read of people lasting thirty days on this stuff
that 's what i mean mysterious
mr. conway i do n't like that man
he 's too vague
we did n't get much information out of him did we bob
how about you
do you want to go
go
where
home
away from here
i 've got porters to take us back
oh my dear boy i 'm sorry
that 's impossible
why i have my classes all started
i do n't care what you 've got started
do you want to go
well no i think i 'd better wait
yes yes
i will
i 'll wait
you 'll wait till you rot
yes
barney
excuse me
please do n't go
you promised to come for tea yesterday
i waited for so long
i 'm sorry
i have n't even got any cigarettes left
i 'll make some for you
you will come today
perhaps
please say you will
the days are so very long and lonely without you
please
all right i 'll be there
thank you
you 'll tell me some of the things i want to know wo n't you
you 'll tell me who runs this place
and why we were kidnapped
and what they 're going to do with us
the hell happened
hesitated sir
i 'm not talking about that
i 'm talking about your choice of targets
you shot an eight year old girl
uh
yes
apparently i did air
the hell were you thinking
well i dunno
i mean when you looked at all the other options
it just seemed sorta obvious
obvious
why do n't you and i have a little talk about the obvious
outside
sir before you boot me i just want to explain
i mean okay you got a goat guy with a hook for a head
cowan--
wait
uh-- sir
please
anyway
hook head guy
i 'm thinking how can he think with a hook for a head
answer that 's not his head
then i think--
cowan--
of course not cause his head is that thing way on the other side of the road cause if you looked at it the entire sidewalk full of stuff was actually one guy and--
cowan-- will you shut your god damed mouth
yes
that 's true
actually at this point i just want a job
wait
what do you mean
yet
it means i know you think you got a beat on things
but trust me you do n't
you do n't even have an inkling of a hint of a clue as to what 's really going on in the world
and if you want to find out even a little you 'll shut up and come with me
and if you do n't fine
go with them
cause i 'm not interested in breaking in another little hot shot only to have him wig or die on me just when i 'm starting to count on him
so forgive me if you do n't exactly hear me ringing little bells and whistling welcome aboard but this is n't the love boat
and i 'm not captain fucking stubing
now i 'm sorry
but this has been one long bad day
we have one motto peace on earth
and goodwill toward man
no
just peace on earth
i got ta be honest about something
once i thought the biggest thing i 'll ever do was guard the president
oh you 'll still be guarding him
it 's easy
you work your way up the secret service one day stand with the president meet the most important people on the planet fulfill your dreams live happily ever after
and if i say yes
lose your name and identity work endless hours an behalf people who do n't know you exist and abandon any hope that you might one day feel even the slightest bit sure of your place in the universe
... think that maybe my supervisors referred me here because of certain issues which i assure you i have spent a good deal of time working very hard to correct--
your supervisors have no idea why you 're here
they do n't
they do n't
now son
if you get the job you 're going to be working with some very particular people who like to do things in some very particular ways
here 's a little piece of advice do n't use this so much
what 's so funny cadet cowan
i
i do n't know air
this guy
mr. best of the best of the best
i do n't know
it 's just still find it a little
humorous
i 'm sorry
sir
well
you know when you say normal what exactly
for instance
it says here you lost your parents at 15 and since then
sir
i thought those records were sealed
we 're the government cowan
you think we 're nuts
no-- it makes sense
cause i got ta tell ya when i was in third grade they told me i was crazy cause i swore that our teacher was from like venus or something
mrs. edelson
only the damn guy wo n't know it
what happens if i say no
hell of an assistant is n't he
damn guy moves so fast he actually gets there before you even ask for him
sorta literally gets ahead of himself
hang on
-- and this is the good part when you 're fully ordained he 'll come when you call him too
dave
so
wait
you just asked
but he goes so fast he actually brought what you asked for before you asked for it
his physics are a little different than ours
do n't worry
it 'll make sense later
no
but you 'll get used to it
welcome to the men in black
sorry cowan i found out literally just before the ceremony
apparently you 're to report for further review
further
what are you talking about air
that makes no sense-- i hold three cadet class records--
actually it did n't come from me
bull
loney- sir
i 'm sorry
sir i 'm sorry
sir
i just i find it hard to believe that it did n't come from you
i mean everything here comes from you
well this did n't
then where did it--
sir
forgive me but it makes no sense
worked my ass off to grad--
look
i do n't know why
i could guess however
maybe it 's your attitude
or that you 're not even close to a team player
or that you always seen to think you know more than your supervisors
actually sir--
cowan
do you ever think that maybe just maybe other people might be right and you might be wrong
all the time sir
you do
yes air
but i 'm usually wrong
sir
which do you have your money on dee
i 'd go with number three
three huh
really
cause a cup of coffee says we 're talking about
number
four
huh
no
mikey
hold it mikey-- i want you to talk to me
mikey
i 'm telling you
do n't make me
mikey gimme the 140
oh
shit
it 's in the car--
what
i thought you just--
little more burn on the perimeter they were n't roasting smores here
dig out this hole a little
cmon i know it 's late but the sooner we get it right the sooner we 'll all be home
kay i 'm sorry
do n't worry about it
four eyes'll run a track on him
we 'll get that son of a
whatever the hell he 's the son of
grab the coffee will ya
i told zed i 'd give him a buzz
listen-- do me a favor-- do n't mention the 140 thing--
do n't worry about it
helluva night is n't it
yup
sure is
hell i may as well do something useful
dee you 've been useful for 50 years
we 're clueless you 're tired
why do n't you go home and get some rest
home
you got ta be kidding me
black
dee
god damn it
i told you to go home
kay
we 'll take it from here
what
who the hell are you
ins washington
special services
vayanse
you others go on
sir--
pasen al furgon v larguense de aqui
take the van and go
sir you ca n't just--
don't sir me-- you have no idea who you're dealing with
this is a neurelyser
it was a gift from some friends from out of town
i need you to look at it
this red eye here isolates and measures the nature of the electronic impulses currently in your brain
more specifically the ones -for memory which it will then block
i said i need you to look right here
why
what are you gon na do
actually that 's a very good question
the answer-- if you 'll just look at this part-- is here
underground gas vein
next time be more careful when you shoot off your guns
what
you heard me
you two especially
it 's a bug
right
but not a bug bug-- it 's an insect
so
lemme get this straight
we got the use of all sorts of technology from all sorts of other planets
we got information no one else in the world is privy to
and we 're in a 1986 ford ltd about to go look at an insect
so what 's the problem
well first of all
i got ta think we could still blend in pretty nice in a ferrari testerrosa
i mean there is a lot of em on the street these days and
uh
i tell you if we really wanted to bland in that 'd what we 'd be wearing
i think it 'd be a good look for you too
i 'll even help you choose a tattoo
it 's the way we do it
the way we 've always done it
i know but we 're on a college campus
this is a college
i 'm sorry i thought it was a carnival
i think she 's the alien
in any case she 's clearly spent my too much time alone in this room
keep her out of here while i check it out
i 'm uh
real curious about your met up here
i see you have the uh double office type thing going here
i 'm just saying it was cold
i think she kind of liked me
she did n't even know you
i know that 's usually the only time i actually have a shot
and what if i wanted to see her again
i 'd have to completely re introduce myself
such a shame too
cause you made such a good impression the first time
hey i was workin her
i was workin my thing
just so i understand
you 're thing is
acting like an idiot
or is it actually being an idiot
besides--
i know i know
i read the manual
no attachments
we work alone
blah
blah
if you do n't have anyone to tell you wo n't tell anyone
believe me you get used to it
i think you 're too used to it
if you ask me you 've been doing this job too long
you do n't know the half of it
what 'd you do before this anyway
wait-- let me guess
ice sculpture
rock
i taught kindergarten
ha ha
no really
it was a long time ago.-
well one thing 's for sure
you could certainly lighten up
why
why
well it would n't hurt you to have a little more fun
i know i do n't know you all that well but--
you do n't know me at all
um-- kay
kay um
how uh fast does this thing actually go
let 's see
that was second gear
kay shifts into third
jay winces
what
something seem unusual to you about that
uh
you mean
a family of sixeyed red faced space creatures travelling to new mexico to have dinner with their cousins the invertebrates
seemed pretty god damned ordinary to me
if it was just a meal why did they have so much luggage
i dunno
maybe it was baby supplies kay starts the car starts to pull a u turn
let 's check am out
now what
history 's proven that where there 's a nitrogenizer there 's a 12-legged signazoid
they use it to make our food digestible for their systems
a signazoid 's eleven thousand pounds
i think we 'd know if held left
then would n't we also know if he 's here
hold it
he 's a slimy little slithering scumwad is what he is
there 's got ta be a hundred pawn shops in downtown philadelphia
i take it there 's a reason we 're going to this one
there 's a god damn good reason
something 's wrong here
gee
you really think
jeebs is eager to have me deport him
but would rather kill himself than go downtown
why
i dunno
why did that family need all their luggage for a dinner
why did mikey leave nazca
and what 's this
what
looks like a train ticket
where to
what 's going on kay
i do n't want to rattle you but dee was here for the war of the worlds
the radio show
no
the aliens organized all of them and tried a coup
they made it seem like a radio show afterwards
you think that 's what's happening
i think that 's what 's happening
ernie goose
cynthia
that 's the loch ness monster
and
kay-- that 's
444-eyes
jesus
get back in the car
perhaps we shoulld take a lesson from our dinosaurs
i dunno man
maybe we should
oh yeah
fill us in why do n't you
what if he 's telling the truth
you know something
i actually never think of that
i got ta get some coffee
kay--
hang on
there 's got ta be something on this guy
did you contact the alliance
do they have anything
he 's here to help
yes
well in his own mind yeah
what if from his point of view he is
how does that help me
well
if you think about it then it would mean that maybe everything he 's saying is true
great
fine
listen why do n't we call the pentagon maybe they 'll take you back with the new age well wishers
i 'll stay here and go extinct with the dinosaurs
kay
all i 'm saying--
i know what you 're saying
and i 'm telling you i do n't trust him--
i know you do n't trust him
you do n't trust anybody--
cause i 've been doing this thirty years and if i do n't know when something does n't feel right by now--
that 's my point
for thirty years you 've been looking through things and under things and behind things
well what i 'm saying is maybe this is a time where you should look right at things
he said our enemy in already here
well maybe it is
maybe our enemy is literally already here
what are you doing
everything left the planet right
except one thing
that little insect-- the one we found in sudbury
did it leave when everything else left
since how long
since as long as we 've been keeping records
maybe they did n't get here
maybe they 've been here
for how long
would you call this a code 100
i 'd double it and add 20
i 'm going to try and cut him off at the hotel
you guys get to the memorial
keep this stuff hidden
the last thing we need is some over zealous secret service twirp to
do his job
right
oh and here
wow
this one 's cool
and it looks just like a shotgun
actually it is a shotgun
hold onto it--
in case i need it
in case i need it
do it
shoot him
kay
you were saying
getting eaten
that was your plan
after i got the shit beat out of me
and i almost got digested
it goes with the job
you coulda told me what you were doing
there was n't time sport
who 's she gon na tell anyway
she only hangs out with dead people
not her
me
they 're beautiful are n't they
the stars
i never just look anymore and they 're beautiful
kay you 're scaring your partner
i have n't been training a partner -- i 've been training a replacement
oh no i ca n't do this job by myself
i 'm just wondering what 's so great out there that everyone 's trying to get to it
or what 's no horrible down here that everyone 's trying to avoid it
why does it feel like the only thing scarier than having a bunch of aliens on the planet
is having then leave the planet
i put word out-- you know how long it takes to get the signals across
kay
seriously
what if he actually means what he says
so i guess you could say you 're really into insects
actually they disgust me
but that 's what i love about them
like a car wrack you know how you should n't look but you always pull over and watch real close or even pretend you 're a reporter so you can get even closer and take pictures
or when someone has a hideous birthmark and all you do is stare
i really like that
let the other girls have the guys like you
chiseled jaw perfect nose quirky dimples
i find you all so boring
i 'd prefer if you were just a little more blunt
so
how 'd you hear about this
oh yeah well you know
i 'm a big fan
i 've read all your work
yeah right
even i can barely read all my work
right right-- i like that stuff
with exclusionary frecto inhibitors
exactly
i very much enjoy that
do have any idea what i just said
once-- just once-- i thought i 'd made the discovery of a lifetime
actually you may have
it 's hard to find
it 's an old civil war cemetery
nobody ever goes there
so
what is it you say you do
i guess you could say we 're entopologists of a sort
i do n't think so
i mean him he could be a scientist maybe
but you
exterminator i 'd understand
but entopolgist
no way
why not
well first of all it 's entomologist
i swear to god that was not here two days ago
what is it
it 's the most amazing insect nest i 've ever seen
and i 'll tell you one thing it sure as hell ai n't the andean mollatoosa
but it 's definitely a nest is n't it
man hey-- maybe you are an entopologist after all
is it my eyes
or is that thing a little
out of focus
okay
if you 've got a bug problem a big one
and they 're swarming and there 's no way to shoot them all individually
how do you get rid of them
the only thing i could think of would be
you 'd have to get rid of the queen
what if you have the foggiest clue as to where the queen is
are you sure you do n't
what are you doing
they respond to fear right
yeah
well i 'm going to give them something to be afraid of
what a coincidence cause i was just thinking about you too jack
recognize this
no
maybe you need a closer look
the kid looked desperate
i figured
you figured what
i figured it did n't matter
it 's my last day of business
i was wrong
i 'm sorry
hey look what i got for you-- a free floating plasma pad
--one of the good ones too with zoids
your licence is revoked
permanently
i understand
i understand thank you
--how about a transmographic dexahydrochlorophallomixaloosalyser
and i 'm arranging deportation papers
yes
yes that 's eminently fair of you
and i 'm bringing you in and locking you up until you tell me--
let 's go jeebs
downtown
you 're not taking me in
goodwill
most entirely
earth has been overrun with an infestation of a species which in order for the planet to survive must be exterminated
nowhere
nowhere huh
odd you 'd get all dressed up like that just to be going nowhere
er
well nowhere special
i do n't believe you mikey
and you know why i do n't believe you
cause last time you said that you and your pals left eight dozen empty beer cans on the other side of the moon
yeah wall you know i was just going there
to pick then up
oh yeah
well if you 're suddenly such a good samaritan why did n't you file a departure report like you 're supposed to
you know how many rules you 've just broken
i dunno
one
try seven
from unauthorized mobilization to appearing unconcealed before a resident
you wanna tell me what 's going on
huh
it 's
coming
what are you talking about it 's coming
what 's coming
so
now what
cattle call again
we 've got about eight or nine prospects i want you look--
yeah i 'll talk to you
... recent landings within a hundred mile radius of sudbury virginia
nothing
nothing at all
now
last month
anything in the last few years
nope
nothing at all
i know what this is
zed you in
yeah kay
did our friend announce when he 's making his speech
noon exactly
did he say where
actually yeah--
would n't happen to be the lincoln memorial would it
how 'd you know that
kay
cause i think we 're looking at it
listen to me
you 're holding something very very dangerous
you 've just iced 350 of your pals--
they 're not my pals--
they 're not even gon na be your enemie a if you do n't give that to me really soon
what if i do n't
in about 10 seconds they 're gon na start losing brain cells at the rate of about a million a minute
will it lower the curve
i do n't think it 's a tradeoff you really want to make
now give it to me-- i can reverse the effects if you give it to me now
i wanna make a deal
we 're from scientific american
we read about your discovery
we 'd like to take a look
scientific american
really
this it
yeah
nov i know it looks normal but watch this
i mean i dunno
i 've seen insects with really great camoflauge ability
but never like this
may i have a look
we 're with the immigration and naturalization service intergalactic bureau
we monitor all alien activity in and around earth and its enveloping atmosphere
come again
hmnn
wall it 's funny cause usually i 'm not all that attracted to stupid guys but--
but unfortunately you 're even less attracted to guys you 've never seen before
we need to talk to you about the alien
the what
which way
seriously
i 'm not going any further until you tell who you are
really nice wheels by the way
wait-- listen--
kay
what 's your 20
highway 119 just west of smith
why
i need you in philadelphia
i got a code 90 in a high school
what the hell is going on
he 's gone too
what about the other agents
ella
tee
elle 's up in portland-- three of her charges left visibly at a trailblazers game
shots got a lot to mop up
tee says his shanghai quadrasectionals have n't been around since morning
even that little bug you found in sudbury seems to have taken off
jesus everyone 's moving
could be an assembly
does it look aggressive
hard to tell
i hope not
keep an eye on things there
we 'll see what we can find out at ernie goosels
they 're gone
dee
what are you doing here
i 'm getting a trajectory
what do we have
are we showing anything
and they 're buying it
they went right to the president
they went to the president
directly
they went over our heads
as far as i can tell the guy 's what he says he is alone and unarmed
all he wants is five minutes to introduce himself to the public
where 's he making his big speech
they have n't announced it yet
all i know is we 're in motion for the most watched media event in history
well it was n't in the jar
did it leave
actually i do n't know
oh shit
how 'd you know
just a guess
but i think found a nest
now what are we looking at
keys
look at them all
why do we have them
mr. president
well uh
so we can got into things i guess
that 's why you have doors mr. president
keys however are to lock the doors
and locks as you know are to keep people out
why
fear
you humans are afraid
so you set up boundaries
borders
your car
your home
your country
all the while your true enemy could very well be considered already here among you
well i am here to let that enemy go
because there 's a border you did n't even know existed
it 's the border to the universe
and unlike your other borders you humans did n't set this border up to keep other planets from you
it was set up by others to keep you away from them
until now
because i have been sent here to open the door
to present you so to speak with the key to the universe
why you might ask
because you 're ready
because you 've finally gone as far as you can go without it
if i may sir
what exactly are you offering
a good question
and a simple answer
no more hunger
no more smog
no more overpopulation
no more war
and i assume you 're bringing this to us because we 're the most powerful country on the planet
that and well
i want my friends to see me on cnn
okay i will admit it ours is an illegal hookup
we 'll gladly pay when you can get your trucks out to install it
wally
can you see
i 'm sorry but i need your help
you contain information
i need to know how to get it
can you just tell me who leo crow is
can you tell me if --
is it now
what
is it now
what
they 're inside
who
take it
agatha
agatha --
can you see the balloon man
what
agatha
wait
he 's here
anderton leave
i ca n't
i have to know
please --
i have to find out what happened to my life
agatha
i 'm not going to kill the man
i do n't even know him
oh god
what is it
every day for the last six years i 've thought about only two things
the first was what my son would look like if he were alive today
if i would even recognize him if i saw him on the street
the second was what i would do to the man who took him
anderton --
you were right
i 'm not being set up
please i want to go back
i ca n't leave
you said so yourself there is no minority report
i do n't have an alternative future
but you still have a choice
the others never had a chance to see their future
you did
where are we going
someplace safe
i have to go back
why
the other two will die without me
you want to spend the rest of your life in the temple
i always wondered what the world would be like
but now that i 've seen it i do n't need to see any more
it 's all right
once i 'm in the tank i wo n't remember any of this
agatha you 're never going back there
i am going back
i see myself there
i 'm sorry john but you have to run again
what --
run
-- but he did n't
then who was he
just some guy
they found
found
where
somewhere
think john
why would they set you up
because i found out about her
about who
anne lively
i 'm so sorry
i just want him back
i want him back so bad
i know
i do too
john
what is it
how did i not see this
agatha who killed you mother
who killed anne lively
do n't worry
i could cut open your chest sew a dead cat in there and you 'd never get an infection
not with the spectrum of antibios i 'll be shooting into you
that 's comforting
you do understand i ca n't just give you new irises
the scanners will read the scar tissue
alarms will go off
large men with guns will appear
right
i know --
anesthesia
try to relax john
i 'm saying i 'll have to remove your eyes
completely
yeah --
and replace them with new ones
i know that but i wanna keep the old ones
why
because my mother gave them to me
what do you care
they 're no good to you on the secondary market anyway
whatever you say john
that 's not much
it 's all i could safely move
tell you what since you and i go way back i 'll give you my old pal discount
how 's that sound
i put you away --
yes you did
you made those tapes
they were performance pieces
you set your patients on fire
and put them out
some not as quickly as others but let 's change the subject shall we
the future is much more interesting than the past
do n't you think
so uh if you were a plastic surgeon before
how can i do what i do now
let 's just say i spent a lot of time in the prison library
there 's food in the refrigerator
make sure you drink a lot of water
how do i find the --
here --
it goes from the bathroom to the kitchen
i ca n't even stand up --
i know you 're in a hurry so i juiced up the nano reconstruction around your new eyes
the nano
what
organic microbots that reconstruct the nerves and blood vessels
it 'll feel like fleas chewing on your eyeballs
but whatever you do do n't scratch
i 'm setting up a timer
when it goes off tomorrow take off your bandages and get the hell out of here
but not before then or you 'll --
-- go blind
i know
you the sentry
yes sir
i 'm gideon
the music relaxes the prisoners
i do n't ever see any of you precops down here i 'm not in trouble am i
no you 're not in trouble
i 'm interested in a murder
kill type
drowning
victim 's a white female
this about the justice department
they laid on a tour for tomorrow a.m. told me to wear a tie
you like this one
hence the expression
... graveyard shift
not to mention saved by the bell
why 's he still a john doe
why was n't he ever id 's from an eyescan
on account of those are not his eyes
he had 'em swapped out to fool the scanners
huh we do n't seem to have her data
try again
no
we have the two previsions from the twins right here but
i ca n't pull up any data from the female
probably just a glitch
hey you wanna know where the word came from glitch
just tell me about the intended victim
this anne lively
looks like she was a neuroin addict like john doe here but i show an address history that includes the beaton clinic
so she cleaned up
where is she now
you 're part of my flock now john
welcome
lara --
it 's actually kind of a rush
they say you get visions that your life flashes before your eyes
that all your dreams come true
tell me not to worry john
do n't worry lamar
the nation votes this week
which makes this the worst possible time to show that we 're only human
uh huh
has the observer from justice shown up yet
hang on lamar --
i need you to do two things for me
one watch danny witwer
yes sir
you can let him look around answer his questions but watch him
if there 's any problems make sure we know about it first
i understand
what 's the other thing
tuck in your shirt
and you say the third prevision was what a little fuzzy or something
i 'm saying the third prevision was n't there
and that 's not all
i spent a few hours down there and it turns out there 's a dozen more cases with missing previsions
danny witwer is scheduled for a tour of containment tomorrow --
so give him a tour
he does n't know enough to ask the right questions
if he 's looking for a flaw in the system --
he 's not
he 's looking for a flaw in us john
lara called me
what
she 's worried about you
and quite frankly so am i.
i 'm fine
i hear you 've been spending a lot of time in the sprawl
i go running down there
in the middle of the night
what if danny witwer came to you right now and insisted on a full chem run
i 'm fine lamar
you understand john that the minute precrime goes national they 're going to take it away from us
we wo n't let them
no
how 's an old man and a cop on the whiff ever going to stop them
just so you know i 've overridden the vehicle locator
i just wanted to talk to you before justice --
justice already knows
talk to me john
tell me what 's happening
this is all witwer
he 's setting me up
stop
just wait
who 's the victim
somebody named leo crow
and who the hell is that
i have no idea
i 've never heard of him
but i 'm supposed to kill him in less than thirty six hours
all right john just take a breath let 's think about this
i 'm out of breath
i 'm a fucking fugitive
then come to my house
we 'll talk --
i ca n't
they 're following me right now
they 'll meet me there
they 'll halo me
how could witwer have accessed the case file
can you fake the cerebral output
we 're years from that
john i 'm asking you please come in we 'll shut down the system until we get this thing figured out
you know i ca n't do that
you ca n't do that
lamar i need you to talk to wally see if witwer 's gone inside the temple again
then ask jad for any off hour eyedents into the analytical room --
john
just tell me who 's leo crow
john
please
listen to me --
i 'm not getting halo'd
you ca n't run --
everybody runs
no doubt the precogs have already seen this
no doubt
then go ahead pull the trigger
seventeen minutes
armor up -- sick sticks and concussion guns -- this is gon na be close
chief the investigator from the fed is here
you 're kidding that 's today
i wrote it down in your calendar then left a message at your house --
all i need some twink from the fed poking around right now
check again with the paper they had it forwarded
see if the neighbors know where they went check all relations --
uh sir
get him some coffee and tell him to wait outside
what he 's doing now we call scrubbing the image looking for clues as to where the murder 's going to happen
the brick has been repointed the glass is original with new glazing bars
i show composite mouldings with dentils
someone took care in the renovation
let 's find the architect
victims are pronounced here
killers here
we never touch anything
i show a cop on horseback
do n't run chief
you know we 'll catch you
you trained us
everybody runs
you do n't have to do this chief
you do n't have to chase me fletcher
okay jad what 's coming
red ball -- double homicide one male one female
killer 's male white 40 's
we need confirmation on the time frame
location still uncertain
remote witnesses are hooked in
case 1108 previsualized by the precogs and recorded on holoshpere by precrime 's q stacks
my fellow witnesses for case 1108 are dr. katherine james and chief justice frank pollard
we ca n't grab it
run the subscription list
look at the kid
in this one he 's on the left of the man in the suit
yeah
so
now look at him
go ahead
did he close the front door
what
did marks close the front door
you guys are nodding your heads like you actually know what the hell he 's talking about
come on chief you think about it the way we work -- changing destiny and all -- we 're more like clergy than cops
uh huh
jad
sir
go back to work
all of you
jad
how come you 're not out there with father witwer
we 're in motion on something
red ball
nope
somebody 's thinking about this one
amazing there 's someone within two hundred miles actually dumb enough to still do that
the victim 's name is leo crow
start a location run and a contact search for future victim leo crow
and jad i 'll need a last known sheet when you get it
i 've got no address -- last known or otherwise -- no tax returns for the last five years
check ncic maybe he 's got a record
then send a protection team as soon as we lock the location
i show time of occurrence friday at fifteen zero six hours
that was easy
confirm with trig and image
any id on the shooter yet
still scrubbing
looks like there 's a third party somebody wearing shades just out the window
as i recall they outlawed compression firearms in the district ten years ago
they did
make yourself comfortable
we 'll be back in an hour
you mind if i tag along
but it 's not the future if you stop it
is n't that a fundamental paradox
yes it is
why did you catch that
because it was going to fall
you 're certain
yes
but it did n't fall
you caught it
the fact that you prevented it from happening does n't change the fact that it was going to happen
you ever get any false positives
someone intends to kill his boss or his wife but they never go through with it
how do the precogs tell the difference
the precogs do n't see what you intend to do only what you will do
then why ca n't they see rapes or assaults
or suicides
it was iris hineman
she developed the precogs designed the system and pioneered the interface
speaking of interfacing i 'd love to say hello
to hineman
to them
cops are n't allowed inside the temple
really
you 've never been inside
we keep a strict separation so that no one can accuse us of tampering
so i 'll be the first one to go in then
maybe you did n't hear me
if it 's a question of authority
there 's no question
you do n't have any
i have a warrant in my pocket that says different
i find it interesting that some people have begun to deify the precogs
the precogs are pattern recognition filters nothing more
but you call this room the temple
just a nickname
the oracle is n't where the power is anyway
the power 's always been with the priests
even if they had to invent the oracle
sorry
old habit
i spent three years at fuller seminary before i became a cop
my father was a minister
lutheran
what does he think of your chosen line of work
i do n't know
he was shot and killed when i was fourteen on the steps of his church in bethesda
it seems i 've found a flaw john you
you gon na tell on me
possession alone will cost you six months not to mention your badge
i ca n't touch you
and john you ca n't be in here
you 'll confuse them
wally
this is danny witwer
he 's from justice and we 're to give him a full run of the farm
they 're not in any pain
we keep their heads pretty well stocked with dopamine and endorphins
plus we maintain careful control over their serotonin levels -- do n't want 'em to drift off to sleep but they ca n't be kept too awake either
it helps if you do n't think of them as human
her pituitary dumped a week 's worth into her system
what did you do to her
nothing
she grabbed me and then there was an image on the screen
she grabbed you
impossible
the precogs are n't even aware of us
in the milk all they see is the future
she was looking right at me
it could have been a nightmare
sometimes they dream about the old murders
she spoke to me
to you
i do n't think so
what 'd she say
she said
wally listen to me
do i know you
who are you
i like you wally so i 'm not gon na kick you or hit you with anything but only if you promise to help me
oh
hi john
detective
nice of you to come down here
seeing as every cop in the world is looking for you right now
jesus what 's up with your eye
i need your help
well hey you did n't have to come all the way down here
for you chief i make housecalls
i need help with her
well hello there honey pie
i 'm impressed anderton
you 're on the lam but you still got the time and energy to slice off a little jerky for yourself
rufus
she 's a precog
she 's a precog
that 's right
are you reading my mind right now
rufus for christ 's sake get up
i 'm sorry for whatever i 'm gon na do
and i swear i did n't do any of the stuff i did
she 's got information inside of her
i need you to get it out
no
no way
i would n't even know where to begin
those thoughts about my cousin elena -- they were just thoughts
i would never --
c'mon rufus you 've been busted twice for felony hacking
so
so now i need you to hack into her
i tell you what
i do this i get to keep whatever images i get from her head
they do n't belong to anybody
then take her to radio shack
stop --
tell me how
what happened
where 's the rest
i guess that 's all of it
rufus play it back
uh i 'll try
four
wow
what a big boy
i love you sean
i love you too
i love you daddy
love ya dad
okay
now let me time you
are you kidding
there 's absolutely positively no way on my best day i could ever beat twelve seconds
come on
all right i 'll try
sean -- you 're not real
you got ta have faith dad
it 's a little late for that
wanna hear something funny
what the hell
i lived for a year with a man who was pretending to be my father
he took me all over the world
you 're alive
no
he got tired of pretending
oh sean --
the funny thing is i started to believe he really was my dad
sean --
i feel bad about that
i need you to forgive me
i forgive you
once i even told him i loved him
i forgive you
the more you want to believe something the easier it is to be fooled
i was looking for you
i know that
i know you would have done anything to find me
i know you would have died for me
i wanted to
good bye dad
who are you
i 'm your son
i 'm you
sean wait
hold your breath dad
six years ago
baltimore
you grabbed a kid at francis public pool in the west end
did i
i do n't recall
i got lots of kids from that place --
do you know who i am
some -- somebody 's father
his name was sean
six years ago
francis pool
... and that i needed his help
it was n't so bad really
i sang him a song made him laugh bought him a pretzel
i took care of him
i made him happy
he 's alive
you 're not gon na kill me
no
but you have to
they said you would
the precogs were wrong
if you do n't kill me my family gets nothing
you 're supposed to kill me
he said you would
who said i would
look i 've put my family through enough misery
you got ta kill me
this way i can leave 'em something
crow
i 'm not gon na kill you
look believe me i know it 's hard but you got ta do it --
i 'm asking you again who made you do this
i do n't know -- i never saw his face
all i know is the next day i was out so the guy must 've had juice somewhere
look man you got ta go through with this
what the fuck is going on
what about the picture --
fake
he gave it to me
now -- -- shoot me goddammit before i lose my nerve
tell me who was it set this up
if i tell you my family gets nothing
who made you do this
kill me
tell me
let go of the gun
you 're not gon na kill me
good bye crow
something wrong
i 'm a little dizzy
yes i 'm afraid that would be from the doll 's eye
the what
the vine -- the baneberry that scratched you during your illegal climb over my wall
what 's so funny
if the unintended consequences of a series of genetic mistakes and science gone haywire can be called invention then yes i invented precrime
you do n't seem all that proud
i 'm not
i was trying to heal them not turn them into
something else
heal who
the innocents we now use to stop the guilty
you 're talking about the precogs
you think the three in the tank come from a test tube
they 're merely the ones who survived
it began as play
a guessing game like you play with any toddler except these children always guessed right
and then the nightmares started
they were all different but all the same
they were all about murder
and the murders were all happening
and how did lamar become involved
back then he was still a da and quite a few parents of my patients had passed through his courtroom
you have to understand these people were the dregs of society
but once they saw their children
he decided he would do whatever he could for them
he 's that way you know paternal about certain things
precrime
the precogs
you
you say some of the children died
so many of them
despite what we did for them
or maybe because of what we did to them
it does n't matter
it 's a perfect system now is n't it
i 'm not a murderer
i 've never even met the man i 'm supposed to kill
and yet a chain of events has started
a chain that will lead inexorably to his death
not if i stay away from him
how can you avoid a man you 've never met
so you wo n't help me
i ca n't help you
no one can
the precogs are never wrong
what
most of the time all three precognitives will see an event in the same way
but once in a while one of them will see things differently than the other two
jesus christ -- why did n't i know about this
because these minority reports are destroyed the instant they occur
why
obviously for precrime to function there ca n't be any suggestion of fallibility
after all what good is a justice system that instills doubt
it may be reasonable but it 's still doubt
you 're saying that i 've halo'd innocent people
i 'm saying that every so often those accused of a precrime might just might have an alternate future
does burgess know about this
about the minority report
i used to joke with lamar that we were the mother and father of precrime
well in my experience parents often see their children as they want them to be not as they are
answer my question
did lamar burgess know about the minority report
yes of course he knew but at the time he felt -- we both felt their existence was
an insignificant variable
insignificant to you maybe but what about those people i put away with alternate futures
my god if the country knew there was a chance they might not --
the system would collapse
i believe in that system
do you
really
you want to bring it down
but you will bring it down if you kill leo crow
why that will be the most spectacular public display of how precrime
did n't work
i 'm not gon na kill anybody
hold that thought
why should i trust you
you should n't
you should n't trust anyone
certainly not the attorney general who wants it all for himself
not the young federal agent who wants your job
not even the old man who just wants to hang onto what he 's created
do n't trust anyone
just find the minority report
you said they 're destroyed
i said the record is destroyed
the original report exists for all time
i designed the system so that whenever a report occurred it would be stored in a safe place -- but not declared
what safe place is that
the safest place of all
where
inside the precog who predicted it
all you have to do is download it
that 's all huh
just walk right into precrime go into the temple somehow tap into the precogs and then download this minority report
if
you have one
-- and then walk out
actually i think you 'll have to run out but yes that 's what you have to do
you 're insane or you think i am
i 'll get eyescanned a dozen times before i get within ten miles of precrime
they 'll pick me up
sometimes in order to see the light you have to risk the dark
how do i even know which one has it
it 's always in the more gifted of the three
which one is that
the female
i have n't worn this damn thing in years
i just wanted to make sure it fits before tonight
you look great
it 's insanity around here
i thought you were retiring
i was but this whole incident with john made me realize the fragility of what we 've built here
this is john 's legacy as much as mine and i want to protect that
who
anne lively
john was talking about her right before they took him
i do n't know who that is
john said something about him being set up because he found out about her
we know why john was tagged
he also said crow was a fake
lamar do you know the reason why john came here to work with you
sean --
no
that 's what everyone thinks
john shot a man dead in baltimore six months before
i understand
no
i do n't think you do
the other day when he came to the cottage he talked about a lot of things but danny witwer the man he was supposed to have just killed
he did n't mention him
he did n't say his name even once
but i also know why he married you you 're as stubborn as he is
lamar --
all right
tell you what i 'll do
first thing monday i 'll look over the witwer evidence and i 'll have gideon run the containment files see if anyone drowned a woman named -- what did you say her name was
anne lively
but i never said she drowned
the guy from usa today is here
tell him not now
he just wanted a few minutes before --
not
now
how did you get this
i padded your expense account for the last six months
you have an emergency call on your private line
thank you
this is burgess
he came to see you yesterday
right before he got tagged
what did you talk about
the mets
john does n't think they 've got a deep enough pitching roster this year and i 'm inclined to agree
why are you protecting him
you knew he was doping yet you did nothing about it
the man lost a child for christ 's sake
six years ago
what did you two talk about yesterday afternoon
none of your damn business
oh it 's all my damn business now lamar
investigation of a supervising office for a capital crime falls under federal jurisdiction
so as to rule out any possibility of conspiracy
he 's my suspect
he 's my subordinate
shall we call the attorney general
i 'm sure he 'd be happy to clarify the issue for you
i do n't want john anderton hurt
lamar i found something
what
i do n't wanna say over the phone but i think we may be chasing the wrong man
where are you
good god
what was that
wait just a second
he told me about this
you got this from containment
yes
this is from the twins arthur and dashiel
agatha 's stream was missing
now this one is from the cyberparlor
anderton downloaded it directly from agatha
watch
it 's the same prevision
not quite
by fooling the system
all someone would have to do is wait for precrime to stop the murder from taking place then a few minutes later commit the crime in exactly the same way
yes
it 's called an echo
the act of murder is such a violent disturbance in the future continuum that it sometimes repeats to the precogs
precog deja vu
we teach the tech 's to identify them and disregard
so there is a way to fool the system
yes
of course it would have to be someone with access to the prevision in the first place someone fairly high up --
shhh
you know what i hear
what
nothing
no footsteps coming up the stairs
no hovercraft out the window
no clickity click of little spyders
no one crashing through that door
and do you know why i do n't hear any of those things danny
because right now the precogs ca n't see
near death 's real popular right now which includes everything from getting hit by a car to falling off a high building to plane crashes
it 's a big rush you come out the other side without a heart attack
i wanna kill my boss
uh huh
okay
you got some images i can work with
right here
good
what i can do is set you up down in the --
uh yeah being concert master of the philadelphia symphony orchestra is one of our most popular choices
no i wanna kill my boss
get the hell outta here
you sick bastard
this is evanna the team pilot
nice to meet you
gum
so if you wanna kill someone you take him to miami
not after the vote next week
once the amendment passes we go national there 's gon na be nowhere to run
ca n't they shut that off
that 's the red ball alarm
because of the nature of murder
there 's nothing more destructive to the metaphysical fabric that binds us than the untimely murder of one human being by another
somehow i do n't think that was walt whitman
do n't worry
i 'll bring him in unharmed
actually gordon you 're not gon na do that
i 'm taking control of the team
what
sir the team 's gon na be light without those men
yes i know
here 's where we 're at
three men in a room
the victims here
anderton here and this unidentified male out the window
the exterior of the adjacent building suggests public housing but i ca n't make out the location
government architecture is modern conformist which means --
there 's thousands of units like this one
they 're everywhere
anderton 's smart enough to go where electronic billboards and other media ca n't id him to pick his pocket
there 's fewer consumers down there which means fewer scanners to target him
no offense sir but why would n't he just run
because he thinks he 's innocent
there are two others in the room besides anderton and crow
two
it does n't matter
he wins
we can stop him
she 's in the room with him when he kills crow
she 's already a part of his future
he 's trying to prove his innocence
he ca n't download her without a lot of technical help
no
he ca n't
that 's why you asked to partner with me on this little sortie is n't it
i think you 're swell company knott
it 's not at all that you do n't trust me to be alone with the chief
that you think i might you know fuck with him if i had the chance
people if you do n't let the spyder scan you we 'll have to come in and arrest you
knott
why do n't i feel like celebrating
cause all of a sudden you got no one you can fucking brown nose anymore
john anderton was my friend
you friend 's a murderer and he ruined our perfect record
six years not one damn murder
he looks familiar
who
the man across the street
i 've seen him before
how can you even tell
you know how blind you are without your glasses
what about your meeting
i 'll reschedule
i 've been working too much anyway
we could have lunch together
i 'd love to but i 've got an open house today at the ressler place
ah
that must be why you look so nice
raincheck
sure
raincheck
this your work
yes
i like it
thanks
you take anything in your coffee
cream and sugar
i do n't have any cream
sorry
just sugar then
you and john ever come here
we used to every summer
he 's not here now is he
i do n't have any sugar either
thank you
he has n't tried to contact you
no
you ever heard him mention the name leo crow
no but then i do n't talk to john that much anymore
so you have n't seen his apartment
that was our apartment
have you been there recently
since right after we lost our son
you mean after he lost your son
it was nobody 's fault
but john was with him at the pool
yes
you said in your divorce papers that he tried to kill himself
it was n't a suicide attempt
i regret ever saying that
what was it then
the fbi found something that belonged to my son
a sandal
anyway john was upset
he
he
he took out his gun and sat down to watch his home movies
this is all in your statement lara
he shot a hole in the damn ceiling
so what
you lose your son let 's see how well you handle it
not very well i 'm sure
i 'd probably start doping myself
or maybe i 'd
lamar burgess thinks that you left john because he lost himself in precrime instead of you
i left him because every time i looked at him i saw my son
every time i got close to him i smelled my little boy
that 's why i left him
and now you can leave
you know i need to use you
to what
trap him
to prevent a murder
sooner or later he 's going to contact you
i have n't seen him in two years
but i 've seen the three hundred hours of your image he 's got stored away
nice to meet you wally
shhh
they 're sleeping
tell me how all this works
look bobby i do n't know what happened and i do n't want to know what happened but something 's up
what are you talking about
maxie wants me to replace you on the job tomorrow
he wants you to come by the office today
they were grabbing her fucking ass --
hey
i do n't know i do n't want to know
far as i 'm concerned you 're a good kid
i got news though without you here i ca n't keep on your friend
i got enough people pretending to sweep
do me a favor arthur keep him on til i see what 's happening
good luck
hi uh excuse me
i 'm here to see mr. reuben
you 're bobby right
yeah
good afternoon bobby
i 'll let max know you 're here
he 'll be a minute hon
you want some coffee
no thank you
you sure
i just made it
no thank you
i 'm good
thanks
martel 's and coke
one ice cube
in a snifter this time
snifter are for warm drinks --
yeah snifters are for cognac --
when served warm --
what 's the matter
you ai n't got no snifters in this motherfucker
we have snifters
then put my martel 's in a snifter
... and here is the key to the mini- bar
room and tax has been picked up by cardiff giant as well as one fifty in incidentals
what 's incidentals
phone room service mini bar
any additional expense
if you need anything you can push the button marked concierge and they 'll be able to help you
now mr. slade you 're in room 315
just give me the key
i 'm gon na stay here
yes sir
is it a good room
i can take you down there
just tell me
wait here
do you have change of a hundred
not on me sir
here
take it
bring me back eighty
are you sure
yeah
take it
thank you very much sir
so
what sir
is it the good room
all the suites are about the same
come on
just tell me
it 'll save all the trouble of you showing me all the rooms
honestly the suites are all about the same
what if i gave you forty
it 's as good a suite as we have unless you want two bedrooms
no
that 's cool
bring me back eighty
thank you sir
where 's the place to go tonight
as far as
nightlife
where 's the hot ass
women
yeah women
if i was a fag i could get laid in a subway
i do n't know forum 's pretty hot tonight
it might be hard to get in though
do n't worry about me getting in
just tell me where it is
it 's on west broadway
see you later
so wait you 're from where
manhattan
you girls are n't from brooklyn or anything
no
i do n't get it
what do you do
we 're in fashion
so you 're models
will you leave me alone already
no sean it 's over
i do n't care
as a matter of fact i am
yeah
in his hotel room
holy shit
i 'm having fun sean
can you handle that
yeah
he does n't judge me
is he cute
he 's okay
should i fuck him
i do n't know
do whatever you want
he 's great right
is he great
he 's alright
i know
but maybe that 's okay
maybe that 's just what you need
oh no
what is it this time
we used to take baths together
come on
let 's go
what the fuck was that about
you wanna get us busted
if max found out you were turning tricks --
i got news for you bobby he do n't give a shit
bullshit
you think he do n't know
i give him his cut of seventeen hundred i think he knows i ca n't make that lap dancing
no more
nobody 's fuckin talking to you
and how could you fucking leave horrace hanging
i got news for you horrace got his ass out of there before you did
bullshit
what
you do n't think horrace would leave your white ass in there to hang
ricky 's not wearing one
ricky can you put on a seat belt
a elephant seal
where 's mommy
she 's uh sleeping
it 's daytime
mommy works hard so you can have all your pretty clothes
do n't you like your pretty clothes
no
show uncle ricky what you made
what 's wrong baby
he 's not doing it
hello
chloe
uncle bobby
hi baby
what are you doing awake
where 's mommy
i do n't know
mommy 's not home
no
what time is it there
can you take me to color me mine
yeah
are you sure mommy 's not home
it 's very late
i got ta go baby
i love you
tell mommy i called
you be a big girl and be careful when you 're alone
i love you
come home
honey
where were you
so what kind of gig is this
easy night
bachelor party
can we give wendy a ride
no
what kind of bachelor party
the easy kind
they 're young and rich and well mannered
oh my god
what happened
a draw
what makes you think they 're well mannered
bobby this is a plumb gig
it 's a bunch of young agents and it 's at a restaurant
it 's gon na be easy and we 'll make a lot of money
i do n't like you working with wendy
why are you working with wendy
they requested her
it was her gig
max put me on as a favor
some favor
i hope they know you 're not like wendy
oh please
if they asked for her they 're probably expecting blowjobs all around
will you cut it out
get ready we 're already late
who 's watching the baby
she 's downstairs with ruth
get ready
i 'm ready
bullshit
these are classy customers
you ca n't show up all fucked up with a fila running suit on
they 're not too classy to have tits rubbed in their face
you talk to max today
i 'm not gon na mention ricky to him
do n't expect you to mention it to him
i 'm just saying if --
the only way he 'll go with ricky is if you 're in too
well that 's not gon na happen
fine
you want to help ricky talk to maxie yourself
i feel weird asking him
you should n't
he likes you
i just wish he never brought it up
ricky wo n't shut up about it
forget ricky
you should be glad max got you driving for me
no coke tonight
right
leave me alone
i have n't touched anything in months
go finish getting ready
i 'll take care of dinner
yeah
you sure
go
no way that cocksucker 's driving you
maybe if you did n't go rambo every time i did a lapdance you 'd still be doing it yourself
meantime i got ta feed my little girl
maxie 's fucking with me
he put you with the spook to get under my skin
ho 's a good guy --
ho 's a fucking pimp
he encourages wendy to turn tricks
and she 's his fucking wife
shhh
he 'll hear you
good
it 'll save me the trouble of repeating myself
he 's not fucking driving you
listen to me bobby
this is my job
it puts a roof over me and my daughter and you for as long as you want to stay
i want you to quit
look at the bills
i ca n't
i 'm not gon na put my daughter through what i went through
i 'll support you
with what
max offered to stake me
yeah well max offers a lot of things
and i got news for you
he 's not the sweet old man you think he is
take her
what 'd you say
i want you to take her with you
whu --
there 's no touching
but what about them
i do n't give a shit
i work for her
no touching
i said no touching
look man i 'm the bachelor alright
i gave her a hundred bucks in tips alone --
get your hands off of her
dude listen man
i 'm cool
how much for the treatment
your dance is over
come on dude
the other chick 's giving my best man a blow job in the toilet
i know the drill i 'll wear a rubber --
i -- i -- i
do n't
i do n't get it
it 's already been a hell of a night
where you been
i had a fight up at sportsman 's
well you look it
you win
draw
what 's your record at
5 5 1
yeah well you let me know when you wanna start makin the real money
yeah sure
i 'm serious
humping sheetrock and driving on weekends got to get to you after a while
might be nice to buy your lady something
all it takes is one fight
what 's up
jess ready
you driving her
yeah
she 'll be out in a minute
c'mon girl
eat up
get away from her
excuse --
what 's up
you all ready to meet ruiz
yeah
where is he
why is n't ruiz coming
this welsh dude is tripping on ruiz cause he 's a shot caller
what 's that
a shot caller
a boss a capo
he 's running shit
yeah
so what do we do
we go and hang out with the dude make him happy drink some tea whatever it takes until he feels comfortable enough to bring it up on his own
we make the drop go home to california
where is this happening
we meet at the globe on park avenue at six forty five
i 'll see you then
now here 's what worries me
he said he wants to meet up at a bar in red hook
you know where that is
no
brooklyn
yeah
he must have that shit troughed
what do you mean troughed
troughed off
protected
like you know like he got a moat around it
ruiz tied in out there
nah man
no one is
they got some puerto ricans and a new crop of fuckin irish immigrants
heard of them
they ran shit back in the eighties
used to cut motherfuckers heads off and sit them on the bar
that 's back when the irish was making a play against the italians
i do n't know if they still around but i do n't fuck with those motherfuckers just in case
it sounds to me like everybody 's just a little jumpy
and since all it is is a drop the welshman 's got nothing at stake
i say we go to his troughed off bar
it 'll calm his nerves we drop the bag and we all get back to our lives
and not a word to maxie
he 'll shit if he knew we crossed a bridge
where we going
quick drop
in and out
where 's ricky
ricky 's taken care of
how so
he was uptown when i paged him
i gave him the address
he 's meeting us there
that it
that 's it
this is it
where 's ricky
i guess inside
or he never made it
either way i do n't give a shit
let 's get this over with
you like the ponies
sure
yeah
you bet the ponies
me
no
not really
smart
hard as hell to handicap
you know what i like
hai alai
fast game
you know why i like it
why
it 's fixed
that 's the only way to win
a sure thing
see that horse
the blaze
this one
yeah
the blaze
i bought her in 66
hired a trainer stall whatever it was
that horse made me over a hundred grand
in sixties dollars
you know what that is today
pshhh
a million
easy
she was fast huh
never won a race
but it got me in with the trainer
we 'd have a thing i do n't remember some fucking thing
the jockey would raise his whip it meant the fix was in we 'd all go running
people get greedy
first they bet small they keep their mouth shut
within a month 's time everyone and their brother was in on it
the odds would drop i mean you could watch the goddamn board
it looked like a fuckin stopwatch the odds would drop so fast
that 's why they call it the smart money
i like you kid
why do you got ta make it so hard for me to take care of you
mr. reuben i swear to god they were out of line
last time maybe with the puerto ricans but these were nice jewish boys
they were out of line --
they 're fucking yeshiva buchas
you did n't have to tear up the goddamn place
you knocked out a guys teeth
that prick tried to get jessica to blow him in the bathroom --
bobby i love jessica like she 's my own daughter
i would kill anyone so much as lays a finger on her or her beautiful daughter but that fucking pisher you socked in the mouth has the most expensive dentist in beverly hills and wants i should buy him an implant
your silverback horseshit 's gon na cost me eight grand
i 'll work it off
not driving jess you wo n't
what
you 're not driving jess no more
two strikes bobby and this last one was big
the bachelor 's father goes to my schul
so that 's it
i 'm out
i did n't say that
then what are you saying
bobby
you 're a bull terrier and i got you herding sheep
i do n't understand
it 's my fault
i send you out to watch scum drool all over the love of your life then i wonder why you seered
it 's my fault
the tooth is on me
but no more
i 'm reassigning you
i do n't want to drive another girl max
the only reason i 'm --
who the fuck do you think you 're talking to
this ai n't a fucking democracy
you want out
no
do n't i put food on you 're table
i sponsor your training i take care of your girl and her little baby
i even pay that deadbeat friend of yours to push a goddamn broom
i know
now you wanna shut up and listen and hear what i got to say
yeah
sorry
i got a way we make everybody happy
yeah
we try something out
there 's someone i 'm in business with named ruiz
i want you to accompany him on a drop
just as scenery
ruiz has his boys
i just want a big guinea with a busted up face to give him a deep bench
as a deterrent
ruiz knows about this
ruiz wants to go alone but it 's not up to ruiz
it 's up to me and i like a sure thing
just go and we 're square on the tooth
what about ricky
he 'd jump at the opportunity
ricky
ricky i lost the truck ricky
you told him you liked him
that was before he lost my carpet cleaning van
he 'll work it off
i do n't know the kid and what little i do scares me
he 's good people mr. reuben
i swear
you vouch for him
yes
what is it
you want --
not you
i want ricky to answer
i already told you i parked it for five minutes and i locked it with the club --
you want us to be wherever you want us to be asap no questions asked
yes
goodbye
there wo n't be a next thing
take a few days --
i do n't need a few days
i 'm gon na settle down with jess
she 's through dancing
we 're opening a restaurant
i hate to ruin your fairy tale but i 've been paying jess rent for six months
she 's got to keep dancing --
that 's him
now you all know the drill right
what drill
dis
dis
you 're not in a position to dis or give props or whatever your real world sense of fucking decorum tells you to do
you 're nothing
you 're wallpaper
you 're not here to make fucking friends
asking a motherfucker where he lives
and who the fuck told you red dragon
we get it
we 're sorry
now that limey motherfucker 's jumpy and wants to change shit around on me
maxie 's gon na shit a nokia when he hears about
aw shit i better call him before he hears
jesus christ where the fuck you been all night
you look like you got shit out in the gorilla house
good morning
do n't easy ruiz me
y'all turned a easter egg hunt into a butt fuck a- thon
bring me four eggs benedict and a mimosa
you all want mimosas
nah man
a bad heart
i did n't tell him shit
he worries too much
i love that old jew but he 's gon na kill himself worrying
we started this shit and we 're gon na finish it
hi
i uh think that 's us
hi
i 'm jimmy
bobby
what 's that
you 're going to the soho grand hotel right
i 'm not sure
all i know is the account is cardiff giant
yeah
you 're staying at the soho grand
you got anything checked
nah
traveling light
i like that
where is the soho grand
soho
so jimmy you know where this address is
yeah
i 'll find it
it 's in harlem
harlem
what is it a restaurant
you do n't know where you 're going
no
just the cross streets
well this is the corner
i can wait around if you want
no
that 's cool man
spa
yeah
depends what night
trustafarians
you know white kids with trust funds acting like they 're poor
keeping it real
know what i mean
this ruiz guy what 's his deal
do n't know much
i hear he runs a tight ship
yeah
understand me
yeah
we 're with ruiz
ruiz is n't here
we 're supposed to meet him here
is ruiz on the list
ruiz is always on the list
he just ai n't here though
can you check
he 's not here
sorry man but
thanks a lot
do n't worry about it
any time bro
thanks
did max mention anything about any jobs
what about boxing
what about it
what are you saying
you said if you did n't have a winning record after eleven fights you 'd talk to max
so
so it was a draw
yeah i 'm 5 5 and 1
so it 's not a winning record
it 's not losing record
that 's not what you said
you said if you did n't have a winning record --
do n't be shitty
how am i being shitty
do n't be shitty
i would n't keep bugging you but you said he said he would have a job for us
i 'm not gon na bring it up to him
of course i do n't want you to bring it up to him
but if it comes up
i 'll page you
yeah
page me
you know the number
yeah
i know the number
cause if you do n't know the number i can page you with the number so you 'll have the number
i know the number
i 'll page you with the number
i 'll see you later
what time you done
i got no idea
ask if he said anything to her
i will
i 'll page you with the number
bye
so i 'm like maybe i 'm not on the list cause i 'm not a fuckin persian
i thought you hate that club
i do
it 's a fuckin persian palace
then why do you try to get in
fuck them
shhh
come on man
not with the owners here
hey baby
nothing
what are you doing
yeah i 'll probably cut out early
we need guns
we do n't need guns
i think we might
he did n't say we need guns
he implied it
you do n't imply about something like that
you lay it out on the table
besides i 'm not taking the job
this is the opportunity of a lifetime
what are you
nuts
you 've been waiting for this kind of opportunity
no
you 've been waiting for this kind of opportunity
damn right i have
you think i like living on fucking yucca
we do a good job on this we 're in
what happened to boxing
i thought we made a vow
shit
who we kidding
i know i suck and i held you up for ten rounds --
bullshit
please
i got three inches on you
you would n't have landed a punch if i did n't let you
you wanna go right now
i 'll beat your ass --
sorry coach
sorry coach
no man
it wrinkles my shit
let 's grab a fuckin beer --
c'mon man not in front of the baby
put on your seat belt before i get another ticket
jesus christ fine
alright
see
now everyone 's got one on
what do you got there
why ca n't we just grab a goddamn beer
i promised chloe we 'd come here
oh give me a break
look at her
she do n't even know where the hell she is
she 'd have more fun at bordner 's
i 'm not taking her to a bar
why not
i grew up in bars
it 's fun for a kid
what
did she say something
she wants you to paint the ashtray
i 'm not painting the fu -- i 'm not painting the ashtray
and frogs are n't purple
max wo n't let me drive jess to dance anymore
who 's driving her
i do n't know
this paint sucks
the white shows through
right here 's fine
is that the woman from
she really liked the kitchen
it 's ours
to keep
holy shit
can you believe this
pretty nice
see man
maxie fuckin takes care of you when you 're in
beats cleaning carpets
what 's the movie
i 'll get the girl
nah do n't bother --
you hear that
you can drink as much as you want up here
we 're not supposed to get drunk
we 're on call
unless we 're supposed to whack out the fuckin pilot i do n't think we 're gon na have to work in the next five hours
i do n't want to show up hammered
we 're supposed to be representing max
oh i 'll represent alright
who you calling
shhh
hello room service
c'mon man
yeah bring up two burgers and a couple of heinekens
i 'm in room
how 'd you know
oh
yeah
how long
cool
how much is it
how much
okay
make it fifteen minutes and you can add on a ten dollar tip
bye
how much was it
forty six
jesus man
plus ten
yeah i guess
great
on my fucking room
relax
you got one fifty
you heard the guy
ricky who knows how long we 're gon na have to be here
we got ta make it last
fine
i 'll put it on my room
okay
do n't worry about it
just be smart
but let me tell you man i do n't like your attitude already
oh really
why 's that
we just got moved up in the world
you got ta let go of that blue collar mentality that was drummed into your head
you got ta start owning it man or they 'll smell you a mile away like a cheap suit
who 's gon na smell me a mile away
do n't play dumb
you know what i 'm talking about
what are you doing
what are you doing
i know you 're not calling jimmy
as a matter of fact i was
you got a problem with that
we 're here representing max
you 're acting like a puerto rican on the fifteenth of the month
you think maxie does n't want us to roll hard
why do you think he gave us all this bread
or the number on the pager
we got ta represent him by showing some class
the man 's got an operation
how does it reflect on him if we nickel and dime it
it 's on west broadway
we can walk
well i do n't want to walk
shit
it 's thirty five cents
you got a dime
fuck
what exactly did they say
they said a hundred thirty fifth and twelfth
they did n't say an address
i told you what they said
nothing else
nothing
how 'd they know who you were
they asked who it was
so they said more than the address
no
they asked who i was then told me what corner
this is bullshit man
what the fuck do you
what the fuck do you have to complain about
do n't even start
no
tell me
what 's so fucking horrible about this gig
you 've been crawling up my ass for six months to get your name on maxie 's list and here we are
look man i never met ruiz okay
i do n't know what the fuck i 'm picking up what the fuck i 'm dropping off who the fuck i 'm meeting
all i know is maxie 's still pissed at me cause i sold his fucking van
you sold it
i thought they stole it
sold it stole it whatever
motherfucker
oh give me a break
do n't tell me you feel bad for the guy
you got ta be kidding me
i vouched for you
relax
i 'll do right by him
you know that
you just do n't fucking get it do you
you know he fucks all his girls do n't you
what the fuck is that supposed --
i mean that 's what i heard --
you got something to say --
you know this guy
his names horrace
horrace this is ricky slade
this shit 's sketchy
why do they drop us in the middle of nowhere to have the guy we 're supposed to meet come meet us just to tell us we have to meet the same guy somewhere else
i do n't know
well i thought you understood and i was just missing it
missing what
he did n't say shit
yeah but you know horrace
what did you get off him
what did i get
yeah
what vibe
i detected no vibe other than that ruiz thinks you 're a fucking idiot
yo fuck him man
calling us guineas
what do you give a shit what he calls us
he 's not our friend
let 's just get this shit over with and go home
what 's this place we 're going to jimmy
you happy
about what
why you got ta make everything difficult
you too
yeah me too
you 're a fucking bull in a china shop
fuck this
where do you think you 're going
back in
you fucking nuts
work 's over
i 'm gon na party
you ca n't go in there
they know you 're with ruiz
you got that right
fuck you
go then
i 'm taking the car
fine
look who 's back
want some champagne
do not put this on ruiz 's tab
start a new one
damn right
bring us two bottles of dom champs and here take fifty in case i call you bitch later when i 'm drunk
siddown motherfucker
sex and paychecks
what the fuck 's going on
dude get back out there
you got ta help me get them in the hot tub
hang on girls
just get out there
i 'll be right out
you know how i do
yeah i know how you do
i know how you do
i 've heard your kibbles and bits all fucking night
you 've been shaking your ass like an unemployed clown
how the room 's a boiling pot of sugar water
how you 're gon na dip a string into it and make rockcandy
who wants to play just the tip
dancing around like a smacked ass
oh and that coat check girl you 've been dragging around as insurance does n't even speak english
what the hell did you do
i swear to god i did n't do anything
what the fuck was that about
she was jonesing for me
hi
it 's ruiz
yeah
so the driver knows where to go
when
we 'll be down in five
no i 'll tell him
he 's right there
bye
what 's up
he wants to see us now
where
he said it 's being arranged
he said jimmy will know
we 're getting whacked
we 're not getting whacked
why else you think he wo n't tell us where the sit down is
it 's not a sit down
he said he 's telling us the plan
what are you doing
i got a bad feeling man
i do n't want to go in naked
you gon na shank him in the shower
is it so unrealistic to think ruiz who does n't even want us here is throwing us to the wolves
as an apology
and i do n't even know what we 're dropping off or picking up --
we 're getting ahead of ourselves
we have n't gotten any sleep
let 's just keep our mouthes shut and not make any mistakes
now hurry up and get your shit on so we 're not late and make things worse
let 's do it
i 'm your soldier
let 's check out the penguins
the what
the penguin house
wait a minute
you want to look at fucking penguins now
yeah
let 's look at the penguins
did you hear what he just said
whatever
we 're here
we may as well go to the penguin house
i 'm tired and i 'm scared and i 'm not looking at fucking penguins
we need guns
we do n't need guns
i 'm pretty sure we do
i listened extremely carefully
nothing was even vaguely implied
he even laughed in your face when you asked him
all the more reason
you would n't even know where to get one
wanna bet
you could n't even get a hand job from bridge and tunnel posse how you gon na get a gun
that 's cause you decided to get all tired all of a sudden
it was six in the fucking morning
float me a hundred bucks
why
you wanna see how fast i get a gun
you 're out of money
no
what do you have left
eighty
eighty bucks
eighty five
what happened to the fifteen hundred
you coulda picked up a tab every once in a while
i did
i paid for half the fuckin drinks
you did
yes i did
you asshole
what about the room
what about it
they only cover one fifty in incidentals
you 've been ordering fucking
motherfucker
calm down
i fucking vouched for you
i vouched for you and you fucked me
this shit 's peanuts compared to what we 're gon na make with maxie
ricky
i 'm trying to save this money
understand
i 'm trying to make it so my girlfriend does n't have to grind her ass into other men 's erections so her daughter can go to private school
i 'm sorry
this is horseshit
it coulda been so easy
it 's gon na be fine
no more man
let 's get some sleep
that 's what we need man
sleep
how we gon na sleep
we only got a few hours til dinner
so what do we do
let 's just go now and wait
three and a half hours
i do n't want to take any more chances
let 's just go get guns i 'd feel better
do n't fuck around
you 're gon na get us all killed
think about it you knocked out that jewish kid 's tooth cost him eight grand maybe more
maybe lost his whole line of clientele
he knows you 're fucking up jess dancing and i got a feeling he knows i stole his carpet cleaning van by the way he looks at me
he ca n't kill us in la cause that leads to too many questions
so he flies us out here first class for a drop that 's turned into whatever
he can make us disappear out here real nice
where do you get this shit
scenario b. i think i 'm getting under ruiz 's skin
i 'm no dummy
he does n't like how it went down with the red drag -- welshman whatever
now i got fruitpie the magician telling me i ca n't call my man max
and that welshman 's sketchy
whatever i do n't know where it 's coming which way it 's coming from i 'm telling you one thing right now i 'm not gon na be late for the dance
you 're not getting a gun
look
they 're together
you telling me this ai n't a set up
easy
holy shit
get me back to manhattan
take us right to kennedy
now
dude we were practically made
i 'll drop you off in a minute
i want to see if the baby 's up
you wanna come in
no
i 'll wait here
i 'll be a minute
hey boys
tom
how 's it going
fine fine
and you were
bobby and ricky
right right
the thugs
i do n't wear a white wig i do n't carry a gavel
that 's a good idea maybe i will
where 's the surprise
you want your surprise
yeah
i want it
well come on then
it 's back here
you want to come splash around
i 'm just warning you i ca n't swim
i want to leave right now
i did n't do anything --
watch out man
sorry
i 'm on the list man
hey bro
the line 's over there
yeah but we 're good
you know what i mean
how is it you 're good
you on a list
yeah
ricky slade
you see a ricky slade
cardiff giant
what
cardiff giant
just check
maybe you wanna try the china club
again with the fucking china club
what do i look like a fucking persian to you
hey
i 'm half lebanese
did you see that shit
motherfucker
you let in fucking screech dude
i 'm waiting and you let in screech
he 's on the list
show me
show me where it says screech on the fucking list
what 's up man
s'up
you look big man
diesel
you been lifting
a little
you look good man
cool
see you later
cool
yes
where do you live
excuse me
where do you live
i operate out of the chicago o'hare hub
can i help you with anything else
yeah
me and my boy here are gon na be in new york overnight
i want you to pass the word around to the honeys back in business class that you all got plans for tonight
i 'm talkin a california style tupac gangster pool party back at the hotel
and make that drink a double
where 's spa
jimmy knows
13th street
we 'll meet you there
how do you know it 's not drugs
maxie knows i do n't go near drugs
i did a minute in quentin for possession with intent
and it ai n't now cause he woulda told me
you strapped
strapped
it means you got a gun
i know what strapped means motherfucker
what the fuck you think this shit is
21 jump street
cool out they 're coming back
just throw up your screw face and do n't speak unless spoken to
do n't drag my ass into this --
he spoke to me
you want me to dis him
i 'm not saying shit to neither of you
why
what i say bad
what the fuck red dragon
what
why am i bad
see you later
you really in trouble
stop
i 'll tell him someone else told me
just do n't ask me no more shit
the welsh dude sees all these niggers in perms and diamonds and shit he gets nervous
but you motherfuckers he just laughs
all beat up in your babaloo suit like fruitpie the magician
so we just go eat with him and that 's gon na solve everything
dude you just got ta settle your shit down
you got ta go and say all that red dragon shit
make him think he 's on barretta
like you were doing any better shucking and jiving like you were waiting for wings outside the quick and split
ow shit
watch it
no shit
does anyone want another
you want another drink
sure
anyplace in particular
i hear the china club is a laugh
what do you want
a little charlie perhaps
coke
i 've heard you 've got the best coke in the states
the shit back home is pants
that should n't be a problem
sorry mates
now there is n't even enough to go around
do n't worry man
it 's all for you
no really mate
here
here they are then
how 's it going
brilliantly
care for a pint
no thanks man
we got to head out
come now
you just got here
that 's alright man
it 's a little early for me to drink
sorry about that
where 's your mate
could n't make it
here 's the money
i ca n't yet vouch for the amount unless you want me to sit here and count
no man that 's fine
just put that you took delivery
i
i just hired these guys to watch my back
motherfucker we 're handing you money
what the hell we gon na pull
last thing i want is you with a gun
word
ricky
soho grand right
is it nice
the soho grand
yeah
you 're from la right
yeah
you 'll love it
so whenever we want
yeah
grab one of the cards behind you
call that number
it 's my cell
so you 're our own private guy
i handle most of cardiff giant 's stuff
you know my pager number
no
what is it
i do n't know
i thought you might
any idea what the job is
the job
alls i know is i 'm taking you to the soho grand
a lot of persians
not usually
mostly trustafarians
i call 'em wiggers
different
sure
you boys want anything
yeah bring us four fernet
four fernet
nigger please
do n't even order that artichoke shit
west side guineas
forget the drinks leo
we got ta roll
what do i owe you
we 're square
thanks man
you need anything you call
thanks
you rode
yeah
you will not carry any other pagers with you
you will not carry anything for that matter that i have not just given you
keys
what
what about my keys
you can carry your keys
you will not mention my name or imply that you are in my employ
you will not speak to anyone while you are working
when you are not working you are considered to be on call and available twenty four hours a day
this means you will not get drunk or do anything that will prevent you from operating in a professional manner
there is already a number in your pager 's memory
it is a car service
when they ask you what account you will respond cardiff giant
they will pick you up and take you anywhere you need to go
in other words there is no reason why you should not reach any destination that you will be called upon to reach within fifteen minutes
do you see a pattern forming
yes
i get it
tell me
do n't worry
i get it
so tell me how it is
you want
why are you picking on me
because you lost my fucking carpet cleaning van and i do n't like you
so wait what are we dropping off
goodbye
i never intended to test you two to that extent but you both came through
i should 've been informed there was a flag on the play but i 'll take that up with ruiz
i made a few calls back east
those punks were n't tied in with anyone
as for the welshman he was n't in on it
he was just plain dumb
as for you ricky your draw will go towards a new carpet cleaning van
but max --
we 're square
yes sir
and as for you bobby you just moved up a notch
your days of fighting for crumbs is through
take a week off come back and we 'll talk about the next thing
no
i 'll take a strega
what motherfucker
you drinking the witch after dinner
yeah
that fernet tastes like tar
my grandfather tried to give me that
some fuckin guineas he sent me
it 's midnight and the motherfucker 's ordering an apertif
it 's a digestif
we do n't know any drill
nobody told us anything
maxie told you to keep your mouth shut while you 're working right
what the fuck you think i wanna hang with you motherfuckers
yeah you 're working
and put down the champagne
she poured it for --
far as she knows you 're john gotti
now put the shit down and act like you got some ass
what the fuck was you told
do n't talk right
unless spoken to ai n't that right horrace
did n't you say that
the red dragon
shut it man
shut it
tom is a square
he do n't but dabble in shit
maxie had me hook up a loan back with him through an austrian passbook account
so we 're talking money laundering
will you tell peter jennings to shut up and fucking listen
the shit 's as routine as you get
i coulda turned it over offshore in a week but maxie likes to do it all his way
safe
i coulda dropped the bag alone
it 's only two hundred g 's
but he sent you all
so i can either send you home and tell maxie or we can flush the toilet one more time and hope it all goes down
yeah
what
when all this is over and we 're not working for maxie i 'd love to run into you on the street
why are n't you coming
that 's none of your fucking business
and here i thought you flew in some out of town muscle
how 's it going men
so you must be the red dragon
well that 's news to me
the name 's tom
mmmm hmm
where 's the uh dragon 's lair
where do you live
edinburgh
and where might that be
scotland
well word on the street is you 're welsh
i am
a rose by any other name would --
dip
yeah
this shit 's fucking brilliant
i just fucking love the fact that you have kids driving around in pickup trucks with a mouthful of this shit speeding their brains out
i got ta bring a case of it home to my mates
it 's illegal back home you know
i 'll get it
who 's up for a night on the town
sit down
we ai n't fixing to eat you
you look brand new in town
pretty handy with a bottle
he had it coming
what they call you
red and i ai n't no punk
you better not be
cause if a cat toe you down in this town you better stand up or make tracks
you ai n't bullshitting me is you boy
my papa taught me one thing do n't never bullshit a west indian bullshit artist
is your papa west indian
no my mama
she 's from grenada
i like you country
where can i get a hold of you
you ca n't
i 'll get a hold of you
lemme write it down for you
do n't never write nothing down
file it up here like i do
'cause if they ca n't find no paper they ai n't got no proof
ya dig
yes sir
did you just now con me
yes sir
why
'cause i want in
and it do n't take a lot to know you there daddy
i like your heart and i like your style
you might just do little
lessen you got to git back to that train job
i done told the man what he could do with his train
when
just now
you looking good little
real clean
clean as the board of health
but you missing something
what
frisk me baby
give me a real pat down
how 's it feel
solid daddy
okay baby
now you outfitted
you ready to tackle the street
let 'em come
i 'm ready
ai n't nuthin' in the world to give you that real deep cool
like girl
you there
i 'm there daddy
wheww
i 'm cool enough to kill
bet you are
sometimes you got a big ugly mouth
yeah and i 'm putting my money where my ugly mouth is
i 'm putting you back in the numbers right now
baby what 's today
1 2 8 2 8 1
i git 'em all
i 'll take your goddam bet
daddy where 's my money
what you talking
you owe me six big ones
1 2 8 hit did n't it
you din't have no 1 2 8
was you that high
old man i threw the slats at you
i said to combinate me
you never had it
the bitch was there
shit what else she gon na say
then skip it man
but you slipping baby
you done slipped
oh sit down man
what you tasting
i 'm buying
i ai n't drinking hot piss with you
come on sam
you 're a damn liar
you took me you bastard and now i 'm taking you
it 's me or you ai n't it pops
you know it
i 'll give you back the 600
i do n't want your money
i 'm wearing archie
there 's two guns on you
you saved my life archie
running me out of harlem
when i think how close we came to gunning each other down i have to thank allah
i was n't gon na shoot you baby
it was just my rep that 's all
and do n't shit me now but did you have that number
tell me
i do n't know
it does n't matter
the thing is we got to get you back on your feet
yeah
i got a couple a new angles ai n't been figured yet
all i need 's a stake and a chance --
can you use a few bucks
i ai n't got much but --
no man i 'm doing okay
thanks
take it easy
lay down and do n't think about it
yeah
you could of been something archie but the devil got to you
man live by his rep
that 's a fact
what you do boy
yeah got to do something about you
you putting a hurtin on my vision
the dirty yellow rat bastard
do n't push it
you way ahead
you back on top
that boy loves you man
what you say
he gave it to you archie
he did
who the hell are you
put it in a cup of water
it 's nutmeg
man what do you want
you need something
it 's not a reefer but it 'll help some
man get outa my face
i ai n't nobody 's punk
if you ai n't trying to punk me what 's your hype
i can show you how to get out of prison
and it 's no hype
talk daddy i 'm listening
hey that ai n't bad
you got some more
that 's the last stuff you 'll ever get from me
what did you give it to me for then
'cause you needed it
'cause you could n't hear me without it
you ai n't lying
when you go busting your fists against a stone wall you 're not using your brains
cause that 's what the white man wants you to do
look at you
putting all that poison in your hair
man you been locked up too long everybody conks
all the cats
why
why does everybody conk
cause i do n't want to walk around with my head all nappy looking like --
like what
looking like me
like a nigger
why do n't you want to look like what you are
what makes you ashamed of being black
i ai n't said i 'm ashamed
the question is who are you
you are in the darkness but it 's not your fault
elijah muhammad can bring you into the light
elijah who
elijah muhammad can get you out of prison
out of the prison of your mind
maybe all you want is another fix
i thought you were smart
what you sniffing around for
i told you i gave you your last fix
i ai n't never seen a cat like you
ai n't you scared talking like that in front of an ofay
what 's he gon na do to me he ai n't already done
you the only cat do n't come on with that whatcha know daddy jive and you do n't cuss none
i respect myself
a man cuss because he has n't got the words to say what 's on his mind
tell you this you ai n't no fool
do n't con me
do n't try
okay okay
do n't con me
what do you do with your time
i read
i study
because the first thing a black man has to do is respect himself
respect his body and his mind
quit taking the white man 's poison into your body his cigarettes his dope his liquor his white woman his pork
that 's what mama used to say
your mama had sense because the pig is a filthy beast part rat part cat and the rest is dog
come on daddy pull my coat
what happens if you give all that up
you get sick or somethin'
i pulled a hustle once and got out of the draft
i 'm telling you god 's words not no hustle
i 'm talking the words of elijah the black man 's god
i 'm telling you boy that god is black
what
everybody knows god is white
but everything the white man taught you you learned
he told you you were a black heathen and you believed him
he told you how he took you out of darkness and brought you to the light
and you believed him
he taught you to worship a blond blue eyed god with white skin -- and you believed him
he told you black was a curse you believed him
did you ever look up the word black in the dictionary
what for
did you ever study anything was n't part of some con
what the hell for man
go on fool the marble shooters are waiting for you
okay okay
show me man
i ca n't make out that shit
soiled with dirt foul sullen hostile forbidding -- as a black day
foully or outrageously wicked as black cruelty
indicating disgrace dishonor or culpability
that 's bullshit
that 's a white man 's book
ai n't all these white man 's books
they sure ai n't no black man 's books in here
then what you telling me to study in them for
you got to learn everything the white man says and use it against him
the truth is laying there if you smart and read behind their words
it 's buried there
you got to dig it out
man how'm i gon na know the ones worth looking at
man i 'm studying in the man 's book
i do n't dig half the words
look 'em up and and out what they mean
where am i gon na start
start at the beginning
page one the first one
here --
aardvark noun
an earth pig an ant- eating african mammal
man that sounds like the dozens
read it and keep on reading
ole pete ai n't much in the head but he can lay in there with the wood
lemme tell you about history black history
you listening
little
no
that 's the name of the slave- master who owned your family
you do n't even know who you are
you 're nothing
less than nothing
a zero
who are you
i 'm not malcolm little and i 'm not satan
who are you
allah has sent us a prophet a black man named elijah muhammad
for if god is black malcolm --
then the devil is white
i knew you 'd hear me
the white man is the devil
all white men are devils
i sure met some
no
elijah muhammad does not say that white man is a devil
he teaches us that the white man is the devil
all white men
the body is a holy repository
i will not touch the white man 's poison his drugs his liquor his carrion his women
a muslim must be strikingly upright
outstanding
so those in the darkness can see the power of the light
i will do it
but the key to islam is submission
that is why twice daily we turn to mecca to the holy of holies to pray
we bend our knees in submission
i ca n't
for evil to bend its knee admit its guilt implore his forgiveness is the hardest thing on earth --
i want to bembry but i ca n't
-- the hardest and the greatest
i ca n't
for evil to bend its knee admit its guilt implore his forgiveness is the hardest thing on earth --
i want to bembry but i ca n't
-- the hardest and the greatest
i do n't know what to say to allah
have you ever bent your knees malcolm
yeah
when i was picking a lock to rob somebody 's house
tell him that
i do n't know how
you can grovel and crawl for sin but not to save your soul
pick the lock malcolm pick it
i want to
god knows i want to
brother bembry can we fix it so our loudspeaker is heard on the street
i 'm sure we can
this is a new sister sister betty
do you
not exactly but i want to be one like you
i admire your enthusiasm but you should never join any organization without first checking it out thoroughly
we need more young warriors like yourself stick around and we shall see if your heart is true
mr. x i wo n't make you out a liar
i 'll have it tomorrow
brother benjamin do not rush it has to be exact
you are now benjamin 2x.
all praises are due to allah
thank you brother minister
come sit with us
is the program ready
no brother minister
why not
you 've had ample time you and the sister
folks are sitting out there today not next week expecting to hear our program
next week brother minister
has the reverend called
is he going to show
make it plain
and now without further remarks i present to you one who is willing to put himself on the line for you --
what
she ate
what points
that you have n't time for either marriage or eating --
considering today 's standards of animal raising and curing meats i do n't fully understand the restriction on pork
let me explain
no
i 'll do better than that
i 'll show it to you
scientifically
but it 's demonstration purely in the interest of science you understand
i see your point
so it is not a matter of the breeding conditions or preparation of the meat
the meat itself is foul
could we sit down someplace
i 'm sorry
i 've had you on your feet for hours
you 've been on your feet for days
and did n't even finish your salad
that 's something i have n't done in fifteen years
what
sat down with a pretty girl and had an ice cream soda
how do you like it
delicious
let 's talk about you for a change
there 's nothing to talk about
oh yes there is
i know a lot about you
brother bembry briefed me
oh
purely scientific interest i 'm sure
you 're from detroit near where i come from
you majored in education at tuskegee
you 're studying nursing and having trouble with your family
i can handle it
they want you to quit the muslims or they wo n't pay your tuition is n't that it
you have enough worries of your own
no good sisters are rare
we need every one
tell me something how tall are you
why do you ask
just an idle question
if it 's just idle i wo n't answer it
but brother bembry says i 'm tall enough for a tall man
how old are you betty
there 's a few things you do n't know about women brother malcolm
they 're possessive and vain
are you
and dogged when i set my mind to something
what have you set your mind to
being a good muslim a good nurse and a good wife
i 'm in detroit
i know
at a gas station
will you marry me
yes
did you hear what i said
yes i did
did you hear my answer
i think so
can you catch a plane
yes
did you eat
i love you
why are you looking at me like that
because you 're in trouble
how do you know
i do n't want to bring my troubles home
you know that
i 'm not made of glass
i just want to sit here and be still
we 've never had a fight
not a real one
but we 're going to have one right now if you do n't talk about it
talk about what
the talk is everywhere
there 's always talk always been talk and always will be talk
do n't they say how i 'm trying to take over the nation how i 'm getting rich off the nation
we 'll get to that too but this is n't just talk any more
los angeles upi elijah muhammad 67-year old leader of the black muslim movement today faced paternity suits from two former secretaries who charged he fathered their four children
there are always slanders always lies
you 're reading the devil 's lies
ca n't you see they 're trying to bring us down bring down the messenger
both women in their 20 's charged they had had intimacies with elijah muhammad since 1957
i was going to talk to bembry about it tonight
to bembry
is bembry your friend
woman have you lost your mind
what 's the matter with you
no what 's the matter with you
wake up
are you so dedicated that you have blinded yourself
are you so committed you can not face the truth
bembry is the editor of the newspaper you established
ask him why your name has n't been in muhammad speaks in over a year
ask him why you rate front page in every paper in the country but not a single sentence in your own
i 'm not interested in personal publicity
our people know what i 'm doing
do you know what bembry is doing
you 're so blind everyone can see this but you
bembry saved my life
the honorable elijah muhammad saved my life
a long time ago
you 've repaid them many times over
ask them why they have new cars and houses full of new furniture
is that what this is about
material wealth
what do we have malcolm
a broken- down jalopy and the clothes on our backs
we do n't even own our own home
what about our children
what about me
you do n't even own life insurance
the nation will provide for you and the children if anything happens to me
will they
are you sure
are you sure or are you blind
dear heart you have to help me
i 'm raising our kids practically by myself while you 're running all over the world
you do n't know how many times the girls ask me when is daddy coming home
what do you want me to do
our people need me
we need you too
what do you want me to do
open your eyes you can face death 24 hours a day but the possibility of betrayal never enters your mind
if you wo n't do that for yourself do it for us
get some sleep
you have to sleep for three
i 'm sorry
i have n't been the best husband or father
shhh
families should n't be separated
i 'll never make another long trip without you and the kids
we 'll all be together
dear heart i love you
we had the best organization that black people ever had and niggers ruined it
stop calling us
leave us alone
leave us alone
i 'll kill you
i 'll kill you
betty it 's me
it 's me
i do n't care about myself my wife and four children were sleeping in their beds they have nothing to do with this
let 's get out of this cold
brother earl
malcolm where are you
we 've been calling all over the city
i 'm gon na try and get some work done tonight
let some of us come down there
no that wo n't be necessary
i 'll be all right
i wish you 'd listen to us
what about the meeting tomorrow
we need to frisk people
i do n't want folks to be searched it makes people uncomfortable
if i ca n't be safe among my own kind where can i be
allah will protect me
reverend chickenwing called last night and said he would n't be able to attend
so now we have no opening speaker
why was n't i informed last night
i called sister betty she did n't tell you
since when do you start telling sister betty my business
since when
she has nothing to do with this
you tell me not her not anybody else
i assumed
what did i tell you about assuming
brother minister what is wrong
the way i feel i ought not to go out there today
in fact i 'm going to ease some of this tension by telling the black man not to fight himself -- that 's all a part of the white man 's big maneuver to keep us fighting amongst ourselves against each other
i 'm not fighting anyone that 's not what we 're here for
let 's cancel
is my family here yet
down front as always
do you know what a friend you have in jesus son
preacher take your tin jesus and the virgin mary both and shove 'em
why do n't you just ask your question
you 've been talking about the disciples
what color were they
i do n't think we know for certain
they were hebrew were n't they
that 's right
as jesus was
jesus was also a hebrew
just what is your question
what color were the original hebrews
i told you we do n't know for certain
then we do n't know that god was white
stop me if i 'm wrong
i polarize the community
i erroneously appraise the racial picture
you put it very well
you left one phrase out
another educated kneegrew said to me and i quote brother malcolm oversimplifies the dynamic interstices of the negro subculture
would you agree
entirely
well i have this to say
do you know what a negro with a b.a. an m.a. and a ph.d. is called -- by the white man
i 'll tell you
he 's called a nigger
let him finish
thank you
now the negro in the field caught hell all day long
he was beaten by the master he lived in a shack wore castoff clothes and hated his master
if the house caught fire he 'd pray for a wind
if the master got sick he 'd pray that he 'd die
and if you said to him let 's go let 's separate he 'd yell yeah man any place is better than this
you 've got a lot of field negroes in america today
i 'm one
if you want to tell me
women are deceitful
they are untrustworthy flesh
i 've seen too many men ruined or tied down or messed up by women
if i surprise you let me explain
menial work teaches us humility
let me do it then
no each of us must relearn that work is the only worthwhile thing
allah has given you a great gift
use it wisely never forgetting that we are nothing while he is all
allah akbar
did you see the papers today
yes sir i did
that was a very bad statement
the country loved this man and you have made it hard in general for muslims
can i ask you something
sure man
are you elijah 's pimp
what
his greatest greatness
say what you 're saying
if you do n't know man then i feel sorriest for you
i thought you said we were going to the movies last night
i say a lot of things
and like a fool i believe it
do your job get me a bourbon on the rocks and a pack of lucky 's
you know that gal
mind your own goddamn business
she comes in a lot
bout every other night red
with him
the average first offender gets two years for burglary
we were all first offenders
that 's what sophia and peg drew --
two years in the women 's reformatory at framingham
but our crime was n't burglary
it was balling white girls
they gave us the book
burglary count one -- 8 to 10 years count two 8 to 10 years count three 8 to 10 years
fourteen counts of 8 to 10 years
the sentences to run concurrently
shorty thought he hit us with 114 years till i explained what concurrently meant
it meant a minimum sentence of 10 years hard labor at the charlestown state prison
the date was february 1946
i was n't quite 21
i had not yet begun to shave
lo
i 've got to freshen up
now you come back
i better not come in
i ai n't stupid
i mean it 's late baby
i know where you 're going
i 'm going to bed
i got ta work tomorrow need my rest
baby i 'll call you tomorrow
what for
i ai n't white and i do n't put out
malcolm you can be anything you want
you got class and you 're smart
all them books you read and you still do n't know nuthin
i do know i love you
let 's go
why
is it because of your white gal
folks say you 're running around town with her
save it baby
save it for mr. right 'cause your grandma 's smarter than ya think
it 's the same questions mrs. little
since the death of your husband --
murder
-- there is a serious question as to whether --
these are my children
mine
and they ai n't no question
none
i think sometimes mrs. little candor is the only kindness
all of your children are delinquent mrs. little and one at least malcolm is a thief
get out
your control over your children therefore --
did you hear me
you 'll regret this mrs. little
if you do n't move out through that door you 're going to be past all regretting
another one
how long has this been going on
all day since you and betty left
brother minister i have to level with you
they gave me a mission
but i could n't do it
i love y' all
what mission
to wire your car so it would explode when you turned the ignition
the ministers say you are spreading untruths about the messenger
the ministers say you are a great hypocrite judas benedict arnold
the ministers say your tongue should be cut out and delivered to the messenger 's doorstep
what does sidney say
i 'm with you brother minister
no
you 'll be marked for death
let me die then
i wo n't let myself come between you and your father
go home
you 're my father
and do n't come back
sheeet you ai n't
i had aplenty
... that is n't a whore
that 's alright
baby take your time
sophia 's not going anywhere
i told you to walk do n't run
shhhh
i do n't like women that talk
you like 'em scrambled soft or hard sweetie
c'mere
sweetie they 're almost ready
you hear me girl
you the man
you better believe it
you evil this morning
what 's your story baby
yeah girl that 's your story
when you gon na holler rape sister
me
you will baby -- if the time come
lemme feed you sweetie while they hot
well all right then
well all reet then
hey man gimme some skin
shorty this is laura
that 's a fine chick
fine as may wine
except she live on the hill and got a grandma
make it too easy and it ai n't no fun
do n't you know you ca n't hump the bogart
eat lead coppers
bang bang
you 're dead
naw you missed me copper
try this on for size
i forgot to tell you i 'm wearing a bulletproof vest
the hell you are
i 'm tired of always playing the cops
i wanna be bogart sometimes
you 're too small to be bogart
i 'm not too short to be cagney
yeah and get a slave too huh baby
i ai n't doing bad
man the name musicians ai n't got shit
how you gon na have something
i need a stake a bundle a grand
my woman ca n't afford it my homey ai n't got it
how about you baby
what you got
jesus red she 's just a kid
jesus ai n't got nothin' to do with this
what did you do homey palm it
yeah
palmed it right in the goddam chamber
jesus christ homey you are nuts
i got to hand it to you homey
that 's the best preacher hype i ever did hear
it is n't a hype shorty
and i meant what i said join us
come on baby
i do n't pay that shit no mind
the honorable elijah muhammad says you should pay it all your mind
if you got a mind
baby i love you
take it easy greasy
how about a snort
i 've been clean for twelve years shorty
you is something homeboy
my trouble is -- i ai n't had enough stuff yet i ai n't et all the ribs i want and i sure ai n't had enough white tail yet
how 's the rest of the gang
you seen anyone
well sammy 's dead
yeah fell over in the bed with a chick twenty years younger than him
had twenty five grand in his pocket
i 'm half wop half nigger and ai n't afraid of no one
what can you do
then i put him to bed and pour talcum powder on him like a baby
he gets his jollies off
so what about him
so
the man got silver china rugs --
might be all right
might be shit
man i know this town
i got my own fences
who the hell are you
who put you in charge
you want to be the head man
that 's right
head nigger in charge
i 'm the man
okay baby
let 's flip for it
flip this
your turn rudy
you want me to flip for you
jesus christ no
okay okay
you got it you got it
you 're the boss
i 'm minister malcolm x. two witnesses saw him brought in
he was not brought out
you heard the sergeant
outside
brother minister he often talked about you
he loves you loves you like his own son
says you are the best his greatest minister but that someday you would leave him and turn against him
he told you that
yes sir
are you sure
yes i am brother minister
all i want is support for my children
he should provide for his children
that 's all i want
allah will provide
we were parceled out all five of us
i went to this reform school and lived at this woman 's house
she was in charge
this is your room malcolm
i know you 'll keep it clean
this is malcolm our new guest
we 'll treat him like a brother
i was special
the only colored kid in class
i became a sort of mascot
like a pink poodle
i did n't know then that i was a nigger
he 's bright
they talked about me like
good grades
fine athlete
president of his class
i was n't there
like i was some kind of pedigreed dog or a horse
like i was invisible
what am i doing here
believe it or not you 're safe here
the judicial police will kill you
if they can
this page
no
you have a rather checkered past
mr. creasy
your interpol file is six pages long
am i a suspect
no
it would be convenient but no
show me mugshots of mexican policemen
maybe then we 'll get somewhere
all these photos you just saw were of policemen
sadly they 're protected
la hermanidad
the brotherhood
hombre en fuego
man on fire
that 's what the papers have named you
it 's what you and rosanna named me
right
sit creasy
everything that happens from now on does so with my permission
really
you wo n't find a better carne asada in all of mexico
the last few days may represent the best police work of my life
what do you want
the same thing as you
except my reach is n't as long as yours
my father was a policemen did you know that
i do n't know shit about you
he was one of the original founders of le hermanidad in the days when it represented good not evil
my family lives in miami
because of the death threats
it 's not worth it
be with them instead
it galls me to watch you
you can do as much in days as i can in years
men like the the dreamer are protected
out of everyone 's grasp it seems but yours
are you going to arrest me or talk me to death
where are you coming from
south america
where are you staying in mexico
i 'm on to juarez
why
i have a friend there
senor
it 's a permit to carry a gun in columbia
the gun you 're about to find in that suitcase
a lot of people are looking for you
i guess that makes you the smart one
we 're interested in the same thing
i 'm writing a story
it 's santa muerte
death worship
the religion of la hermanidad
there 's a curse on you
it 's a little late
maybe i can help your situation and you mine
so where do we begin
i need the name and address of the owner of a toyota corolla license number me31704
we did n't get the last digit so i need the ten possible matches
so what do i get in return
let 's see how the relationship develops
i 'll call you in the am
thanks
i need something
do you have banking connections
i have connections
where do i find you
i 'll call you tomorrow
what do you know about the cop
tazinari
the one who made the ransom drop with samuel ramos
he 's an old fashioned patrone with the worst reputation
he 's high on my hit list
where does he live
he lives in a judicial compound
he travels by motorcade
he has better protection than george bush
even more importantly he is part of la hermanidad
his reach is far and wide
give me the address
reina rosas
si
how do you contact the boss
we page him and he calls back on this cell phone
what is his name
daniel
daniel what
daniel rosas sanchez
so you 're married to him
and this looks remarkably like his brother
what is his name
aurillio rosas sanchez
how does it work
everything on the cellphone
we wait for calls
we have no number to call
who pays you
we have an atm bank card
we draw out 300 dollars every two weeks
what 's the pin number
the what
the number you use at the bank machine
four seven four seven
who killed her
you
no
do n't lie to me
the boss did or his brother
who 's the boss
we do n't know
we never see his face
we have to wait in the other room
he was screaming to the girl that
what money
the ransom money
at the drop
he said tazinari one of the policemen had taken it
he was crazy
who 's tazinari
head of the anti kidnapping division
do you know who i am
who are you
i am the president of la hermanidad
the ramos kidnapping
how did it work
i do n't know
we were just given instructions to take her
ordered by who
i do n't know
we work in parts
a voice calls in a kidnapping
we deliver the target to the guardians
we do n't even know them
they might transfer to other guardians
the negotiators and the bosses do n't even see the target
they just make the deal
who ordered it
the cops call him the dreamer
where do i find him
i do n't know
no one knows
i do n't know i swear
i believe you
i 'm professional
i just do my job
me too
tell me about the guardians
he called me on the cell phone to set a time and location for the switch
who 's he
the one who transferred pinta to their car
who 's he
i do n't know but i know his face
i see him sometimes at the handball court in chapultepec on a saturday afternoon
how do i recognize him
he has a tattoo covering two thirds of his back
he is part of the brotherhood
in the next hour where do i find your partner
one one three arco iris
third floor
hello daniel
i 've got your family and i want to negotiate
mr. creasy
what do you want
i want you
how much do you want
it 's non negotiable
two million u.s
three million u.s.
i told you non negotiable
the girl 's
pinta 's
you 're a liar
pinta 's dead
i 'm a businessman
a dead girl is worth nothing
she is alive
do you know who i am
i am the commandante of the judicial anti- kidnapping division
and one of the founding members of la hermanidad
correct
please do n't
it 's all up to you commandante
tell me about you and the dreamer
i do n't know him
i saw the opportunity and got lucky
lucky how
that he used policemen
that you killed them it made it a police matter
the ramos family could n't refuse our involvement
and
and i had my men ready
you stole the drop
yes
many times
o.k. so tell me more
there was no ten million dollars
the ransom was ten
two and a half
that 's how much there was
do n't lie to me
two and a half
the rest was paper
strips of paper
maybe your men stole from you
no
whoever took the rest took it before the exchange
who gave the bags to ramos
his lawyer
jordan kalfus
that 's all i know
please
i 'm sorry for the girl
but it was business
i 'm a professional
that 's what everybody keeps saying
were you provided with a gun
yes
show me please
your resume is impressive
nine years in the army
extensive counter terrorism work
i should n't be able to afford you in my current state
what 's the catch
i drink
how does it affect you
my coordination
reaction time
if top professionals try to kidnap your daughter the service will be on par with the pay
and what if amateurs try it
i 'll probably kill them
is that likely
no
and no one is to know of your drinking problem
that includes my wife
when did mexican customs start getting smart
creasy
where the fuck are you
i 'm here
what do you mean i 'm here
i 'm in a customs holding tank in mexico city international
bring a bunch of cash
about 5k. i 'm going to need it
you got a secondary search and you had a gun
listen it was a calculated risk
i 've done it a million times and never got caught
everything happens once if you live long enough
it does n't make sense to x ray your bags coming off the plane
this is mexico they do everything backwards
so what 's wrong
nothing wrong
do n't give me that bullshit
so how 's business
japanese are here in a big way
cheap labor
factory space
but they feel a lot safer living over the border in el paso
i ferry 'em back and forth
they think i 'm john fucking- wayne
but do n't you stay in el paso
fuck i love mexico
i live like a king down here
yeah right
oh like you have n't been in worse places
and a level five shithole is better than a level six
your logic 's inescapable
you been working
not for eight months
i was in columbia looking around but nothing seemed interesting
how long you staying crease
got no plans rayburn nothing on
just wanted to see you how you were
came by on impulse
you did something on impulse
everything happens once if you live long enough
what are you doing here
i came to visit you
bullshit
i 've known you fifteen years
you do n't visit
a bodyguard
who 's the guy
samuel ramos
owns one of the plants in juarez
the jap car industry is in the toilet
he 's trying to persuade ford to partner with him
i think he 's in trouble
he asked me if i knew anyone he could trust
oh now you think i can be trusted
take a job creasy
breathe some air
then decide if you want to
stick around or not
there 's still ink on my fingers from last week
you got tossed
do n't trust the cops especially the judicials
oh you know that
you mean a misfire
i mean nothing
the hammer came down and nothing happened
dimple on the primer
i 've heard of it
never happened to me though
maybe the firing pin 's off
maybe
creasy
sorry i woke you ray
then one day he calls and says i 'm in love and i 'm moving to mexico
i said what happened to the plan
i said the plan was right here
you got three of the fuckers
all dead
pinta
two days gone
they 're negotiating a ransom
stomach 's gone
but
okay
i 'll get you up to the border
friend of mine'll take you in to san diego
drop you right at the hospital
fuck
look at you you wo n't last a day the shape you 're in
unless you stop bleeding you should have your spleen removed
yes or no
i wo n't kill again
hunt people
i gave that up
anything else
it 's yours
do you like dogs mr. creasy
if they like me
frank does n't take to most people
do you speak german
ein klines bisschen
a tiny bit
frank only responds to commands in german
he was trained in frankfurt
my dad loves the idea of having a dog around but hates the fact he lives inside
that 's bird
emilio forgot to take him with when he left
who 's emilio
my last bodyguard
he drove me to school in the morning and picked me up in the afternoon
in between you can take mom shopping and to lunch
does that sound alright mr. creasy
creasy
just call me creasy
creasy
where are you from creasy
the united states
i know
but which state
no
you can drive and talk at the same time ca n't you
no
why not
i 'm looking for potential
potential
i do n't understand
places where the road bends places away from buildings places where the traffic thins out
but you do n't have to understand
i do
so no talking
are you going to quit
my last bodyguard quit
let me guess you would n't stop talking
someone gave him more money than we could
i 'm a bargain
being black is that a positive or negative for a bodyguard in mexico
time will tell
there were 24 kidnappings in mexico city in the last six days
four a day
what do you think about that mr. creasy
pretty impressive
maybe i need to up my fee or get a larger gun
we 're taking a different way home
that 's right
did you like school creasy
no
not at all
no
but why not
pinta do you have a pencil
i go to school do n't i
you 're fast
once i get in the water but not starting off
by the time i catch up it 's too late
what are you doing
calling for emilio 's macaw
i thought i heard him
do you think he 'll come back
maybe
did you hear him
no
how do you think he got out
well i let him go
it 's better to be free right
yes
actually he was driving me crazy
they 'll be back in a week
they can stay for two weeks
i do n't care
it hurts
where
everywhere
i do n't think they 're broken
anywhere else
my ankle
the night you arrived mom asked you if you had a family and you lied did n't you
white lie
i did n't have a family
but i did have two kids
they 're adults now
do you always sleep with him
i 'm too old for him
do n't tell my friends
i do n't talk to them much
does he have a name
why do you ask
it was in a book at school
concubine
well it 's a sort of wife
but the emperor of china had 1000 of them
how can that be
in the west it 's one wife for one husband but different cultures have different rules
it must be difficult having lots of wives
you feel sorry for the husband
yeah
can you imagine my mother multiplied by a thousand
so how come you know so much about those countries
i had to do my homework on them when i worked there
also i enjoy history
what did you do in asia
is that where you met the man with cigarettes
no that was in columbia
you do n't flinch when a gun goes off you react
you go
do n't listen for the sound do n't anticipate it
concentrate on the sound itself
i do n't understand
do n't worry
you will
remember you asked me what state i was from
yes
where you 're from is n't so much about geography it 's about events
where you 're from is what happened to you
good things happen too creasy
like meeting me
i guess that really does make me a hard case
do you have a girlfriend creasy
no
did you used to
yeah
two or three
you 're late
i 'm sorry
you were never late before i was worried
where 's my mother
i dropped her at home
it 's no wonder you 're late
why did n't she just come with you
i 'm tough creasy
i 'm tough as you
there 's no such thing as tough
you 're either trained or untrained
what 's so important in los angeles
your father has business
why today
and why 'd she have to go with him
the blocks
i 'm a prisoner in them
until the gunshot sets me free
could i ask you a question
could i stop you
you do n't drink like you used to
that 's not a question
i know because i go in your room and check the bottles
still not a question
my mom drinks too
why do people drink creasy
now that 's a question
i do n't know about your mom
for me the problem is n't in the glass
the problem 's in between my ears
you think too much
yeah
because at one time i did n't think enough
pinta we 've got to go
travel sucks at this time
frank
frankie
that 's strange
frank was a no show
not like him to miss a ride
you should break all my fingers creasy then tape them back together
i wo n't be able to play the piano but i could still swim
do n't be a baby
you 're tougher than that
there 's no such thing as tough creasy
just trained and untrained
then be trained
i 'm going to keep people safe someday
just like you
be a swimmer
i could do it
remember the day you wanted the pencil
i know why
and i saw that car again
i wrote the license number in my notebook
except i missed the last number
continue to play in the wrong key like you 're dyslexic
dyslexic
like st. jude
a hopeless case that has a complete block about c minor
but remember whoever resists authority will bring judgement upon themselves
new testament romans 13
you got that right
you 'll be back in the water in twenty- four hours
the world of our children
how dare they
it 's war
the weakest suffer the most
you 're american
so are you
how are you getting along with pinta
we 'll be okay once she realizes i 'm not a new toy
yes she told me
do you have children mr. creasy
no
you should know they 're tenacious when they want something
and pinta wants to be friends
you 're paying me to protect her not amuse her
right
look
maybe this is n't going to work
maybe you should ask your husband to hire someone
more sociable
no you 're right
you were hired to protect her that 's enough
i 'm confident you 'll do that
it makes it all seem so serious
it is serious mrs. ramos
please it 's lisa
i 'll be coming with you tomorrow
i have lunch with friends
sorry
the traffic takes some getting used to
jordan
if something happened my reaction would be to fight to protect her
i have skills in that respect
pinta would benefit by the fact that
i 'm a soldier
why are you here
why did n't you die
because
i was already dead
they planned it samuel and kalfus
planned what
an autosequestra
kalfus arranged for pinta to be taken to a safehouse
i 'm sure he thought she 'd sit there for three days eating pizza and watching tv
it did n't work out that way
everything got fucked up when i killed the cops and tazinari saw an opportunity
i do n't believe you
i want you to get into your car now and meet me on the south end of the footbridge between reforma and the freeway junction
in 45 minutes
you 're lying
i do n't believe you
then do n't come
the family paid the ransom and he was returned two days later
his father still has n't gotten up the nerve to ask him if they fucked him up the ass
and now every mother with money in mexico city wants bigger and better bodyguards
my own wife included
if she pisses you off you get another one
do you know what she told me last night
of course i care about pinta
she 'll be as beautiful as her mother one day
yeah
and if she was ugly
all my clients have kidnap and ransom insurance
i have a policy aig
it covers me and my family and when it runs out in sixty days without a bodyguard i will not be able to renew it
i know you need to please lisa
an ass like that is hard to find
good bodyguards are even harder
i know
i just had to let one go because i could n't afford him
you need a bodyguard of some description
it 's a dangerous world we live in
but you will get what you pay for
he does n't need to be superman does he
can you go fifteen grand
for a year
for a few months
hire someone cheap
you have to have a bodyguard to keep the insurance
then fire him for incompetence
the important thing is lisa 's daughter will return to school
and lisa will be able to save face
we wo n't be the only family without a bodyguard
her beauty fucks with your mind
for an american she understands this country very well
she understands men
you have the money
yes
ok repeat the drop instructions
the money 10 million u.s. will be divided into two 15 gallon black canvas bags each containing five million which will be checked at the bank by the k&r agent
then driven to the house in an armored car where it will be transferred to the delivery car
the car will not be powerful and have no trunk
i need a driver to drive samuel the father
no
why
he has a heart condition
angina
he responds badly to stress
ok
you will arrive at columbus circle and reforma avenue at 3am
you will drive around the square two times
samuel will remove his shirt and hold it out the window to i.d. the car
you should be sleeping baby
i 'm trying mom
yes mom
this is mr. creasy
i like him mom
you do
he 's like a great big bear
creasy bear
i think he 's been sick
he 's alright now but i think he 's been very very sick
well think about going to sleep
good night baby
bye mom
do n't forget your towel
i 'll call you from detroit baby
you 're going to miss mexican halloween
the day of the dead
a man 's worth can be judged by what he has or what he owes
only the amount matters
and bankruptcy
where will that put me in the social strata
i 'm only asking for one thing
and it 's not an extravagance
it 's not even for me it 's for our daughter
our daughter
our child 's safety is at stake
these people are professionals
they do n't waste their time taking children whose fathers are virtually bankrupt
samuel it is not something we should skimp on
a bodyguard 's presence in the car or outside the school was at least some form of deterrent
now he 's gone i feel totally exposed
my wife mr. creasy
lisa martin ramos mr. creasy
she likes him
hmm
creasy
pinta likes him
pinta loves school
she 'd like count dracula is he took her back there
he has to go samuel
what
who
creasy
why
you were so pleased with him
pinta likes him too much
she thinks of him as a father
that 's ridiculous
it 's not
i 've just been so busy lisa
he has to go
it will be a hard break
she 's young
she 'll get over it
i was n't thinking of pinta
a bodyguard was shot trying to protect a 9 year old
the bodyguard 's american
not only that he 's black
is that good or bad
that 's good
really good
he shot and killed two judicial cops and a kidnapper died in the attack
they 're saying he 's responsible
he 'll die of his wounds bleed to death before he can do anything
he sounded strong to me
stronger than we are
because he 's outside
because he 's not tied to the same system we are
we did voice analysis of the last five high profile kidnappings including the little girl
the same man the dreamer
listen to this
i know this
your point
creasy is not a policeman
my sense is he could be very valuable to us
when you talked to him did he look sane
no
not by the rules of polite society at least
i think he 's
magnificent
you only fuck me to get information
you only give information so you can fuck me
a beautiful circle
and as long as we 're talking information there 's something else as well
i should start going for your tits first
who 's that
he 's the man the boss
my guys got into the house on the pretext of giving cholera shots
we had to inject the whole barrio
we bugged the house and stole the picture of him
he 's not a cop killer
i 'm sure he is n't
though he 's certainly adept at killing
he was doing his job protecting the girl
if police were involved you figure it out
i 'm here for him
so am i.
pollo pibil
chicken and chorizo sausage
hmmmh
they marinate it in lemon and orange juice
it 's a stew really
i already ate
tell me about your friend creasy
you just said it
he 's my friend
nothing else to say
i read the file
you and creasy have been seen quite a bit together
two tourists who never went home
you helped him get this job
that 's what friends do
yes
but if i traced creasy to you others will do it as well
their facilities are as good as my own if not better
i can take care of myself
you and creasy both
a two man army according to interpol
panama
lebanon with the druze
desert storm
where you were contracted by the u.s. army to hunt down elite iraqi military commanders
you two were a married couple
the kind that gets divorced but still stay friends
what happened to him
what happened to creasy
none of your business
or mine for that matter
i got nothing more to say
this is my jurisdiction
i want these men as much as creasy does
he 'll deliver more justice in a weekend than ten years of your courts and tribunals
so stay out of his way
i plan to
i 'll even help him if i can
he 's going to lead me to the the dreamer
someone i want very badly
but i 'd like to understand him
give me that
pinta martin ramos is just a number to you
tragic a public outcry but a number
one more dead
what was she to creasy then
light
at the end of a long dark tunnel
somehow she showed him it was alright to live again
and they took that away
a man can be an artist in anything
stone paint words
food
anything if his soul is true to it
creasy 's art is death
and he 's about to paint his masterpiece
so waddaya feel like doing tonight
i do n't know ang
wadda you feel like doing
well we oughta do something
it 's saturday night
i do n't wanna go bowling like last saturday
how about calling up that big girl we picked up inna movies about a month ago in the rko chester
which one was that
that big girl that was sitting in front of us with the skinny friend
oh yeah
we took them home alla way out in brooklyn
her name was mary feeney
what do you say
you think i oughta give her a ring
i 'll take the skinny one
she probably got a date by now angie
well let 's call her up
what can we lose
i did n't like her angie
i do n't feel like calling her up
well what do you feel like doing tonight
i do n't know
what do you feel like doing
well we 're back to that huh
i say to you what do you feel like doing tonight
and you say to me i do n't know what do you feel like doing
and then we wind up sitting around your house with a coupla cansa beer watching sid caesar on television
well i tell you what i feel like doing
i feel like calling up this mary feeney
she likes you
what makes you say that
i could see she likes you
yeah sure
i 'll call her up
you call her up for yourself angie
i do n't feel like calling her up
boy you 're getting to be a real drag you know that
angie i 'm thirty four years old
i been looking for a girl every saturday night of my life
i 'm tired of looking
everybody 's always telling me to get married
get married
get married
do n't you think i wanna get married
i wanna get married
they drive me crazy
now i do n't wanna wreck your saturday night for you angie
you wanna go somewhere you go ahead
i do n't wanna go
my old lady every word outta her mouth when you gon na get married
my mother boy she drives me crazy
so what do you feel like doing tonight
i do n't know
what do you feel like doing
not a bad crowd tonight you know
there was one nice looking one there inna black dress and beads but she 's dancing now
there 's a nice looking little short one for you right now
where
down there
that little one there
yeah she looks all right from here
well waddaya say you wanna ask them
i 'll take the one inna green dress
i think this number is a little fast
wait a minute
where you been for pete sakes
i been looking all over for you
i looked for you angie before i cut out but i could n't find you
i been looking all over for you
waddaya gon na do now
i 'm gon na take clara home
it 's close to one
you want me to ride down with you
what for
it 's early
it must be one o'clock
it 's saturday night
there 's still plenty a action around
angie by the time i get clara home it 's gon na be one one thirty
by the time i get home it 's gon na be two o'clock
i got ta get up for ten o'clock mass tomorrow
all right i 'll see you
where you going
marty let 's go downna seventy second street area tonight
i do n't feel like going angie
i thought i 'd take this girl to a movie
boy you really musta made out good last night
we just talked
boy she musta been some talker
she musta been about fifty years old
i did n't think she was so bad looking
she musta kept you inna shadows all night
i told this dog i was gon na call her today about two thirty
brush her
listen you wanna come with me tonight or you wanna go with this dog
waddaya getting so sore about
i looked all over for you last night you know that
marty your mother wants you onna phone
come on over about half past seven we 'll think of something
hello ma what 's the matter
hello lou angie come in yet
he was here last night till about two o'clock
i hear you really got stuck with a dog last night
who told you that
angie
he says she was a real scrawny- looking thing
she was n't so bad
hey
what are you doing here
i came to see you
how you feel
i got ta pain in my left side and my leg throbs like a drum
i been getting a pain in my shoulder
i got ta pains in my shoulder too
i have a pain in my hip and my right arm aches so much i ca n't sleep
it 's a curse to be old
how you feel
i feel fine
that 's nice
we got ta postcard from my son nickie and his bride
they 're inna big hotel in florida on their honeymoon
everything is very nice
that 's nice
i got ta letter from my husband 's cousin in abruzzi
his mother died
oh
do you remember emilio digiorgio owned the tavern in abruzzi
i do n't think i remember him
well he died
you know who else died
who
you know the old man upstairs in this house
old irishman always drunk
he got pleurisy
he was inna hospital two weeks
he died yesterday
well i always like to visit you catherine because you always got such cheerful news
ah
you son thomas and virginia they come to my house this afternoon
who
your son thomas and his wife virginia
when was this
this afternoon about four five o'clock
what they say
you know what they say
they say things are no good in this house
catherine your son is married
leave him in peace
he wantsa be alone with his wife
they do n't want no old lady sitting inna balcony
now i tell you what i think
i want you come live with me in my house with marty and me
in my house you have your own room
you do n't have to sleep onna couch inna living room like here
we will cook inna kitchen and talk like when we were girls
you are dear to me and you are dear to marty
we are pleased for you to come
my son thomas came to see you this afternoon and he said to you he wants to cast his mother from his house
catherine do n't make an opera outta this
the three a you anna baby live in three skinny rooms
you are an old goat and she has an italian temper
she is a good girl but you drive her crazy
catherine you are no fool
you know this is no good an old woman living with a husband and wife
two women inna same kitchen anna house burns down
so i am an old garbage bag put inna street
oh catherine please
do n't make a tragedy
you come to my house where you know you be happier yourself
it pains that they should do this
i know it pains
catherine you are very dear to me
we have cried many times together
when my husband died i would have gone insane if it were not for you
i ask you to come to my house because i can make you happy
please come to my house
these are the worst years
i tell you
it 's gon na happen to you
i 'm afraida look inna mirror
i 'm afraid i 'm gon na see an old lady with white hair like the old ladies inna park little bundles inna black shawl waiting for the coffin
i 'm fifty- six years old
what am i to do with myself
i have strength in my hands
i wanna cook
i wanna clean
i wanna make dinner for my children
am i an old dog to lie in fronta the fire til my eyes close
these are the terrible years theresa
terrible years
catherine my sister
hey i come home from your house last night marty was here with a girl
who
marty
your son marty
well what marty you think is gon na be here in this house with a girl
were the lights on
oh sure
this girl is a college graduate
they 're the worst
college girls are one step from the streets
they smoke like men inna saloon
my son joseph his wife you know she types onna typewriter
one step from the streets i tell you
mrs. pilletti ponders this philosophy for a moment
that 's the first time marty ever brought a girl to this house
she seems like a nice girl
i think he has a feeling for this girl
you heard him sing
he been singing like that all morning
well that 's all
you will see
today tomorrow inna week he 's gon na say to you hey ma it 's no good being a single man
i 'm tired a running around
then he 's gon na say hey ma wadda we need this old house
why do n't we sell this old house move into a nicer parta town
a nice little apartment
i do n't sell this house i tell you that
this is my husband 's house
i had six children in this house
you will see
a coupla months you gon na be an old lady sleeping onna couch in her daughter in law 's house
catherine you are a blanket of gloom
wherever you are the rain follows
someday you gon na smile and we gon na declare a holiday
you come up here often
i was up here twice before
once with a friend of mine and once i came up alone
the last time
do you see that girl in the gray dress sitting over there
yeah
well the last time i was up here that 's where i sat
i sat there for an hour and a half without moving a muscle
now and then some fellow would sort of walk up to me and then change his mind
i 'll never forget just sitting there for an hour and a half with my hands in my lap
then i began to cry and i had to get up and go home
i cry a lot too
i 'm a big cryer
this is something recent with me this bursting into tears at the least thing
oh i cry all the time any little thing
my brothers my brother in- laws they 're always telling me what a goodhearted guy i am
well you do n't get goodhearted by accident
you get kicked around long enough you get to be a real professor of pain
i know exactly how you feel
and i also want you to know i 'm having a very good time with you now and really enjoying myself
so you see you 're not such a dog as you think you are
i 'm having a very good time too
so there you are
so i guess i 'm not such a dog as i think i am
you 're a very nice guy and i do n't know why some girl has n't grabbed you off long ago
i do n't know either
i think i 'm a very nice guy
i also think i 'm a pretty smart guy in my own way
i 'm twenty nine years old
how old are you
i 'm thirty four
... when i got outta the army clara i was lost
i did n't know what i wanted to do
i was twenny five years old what was i gon na do go back to my old job forty cents an hour
i thought maybe i go to college under the g.i. biller rights you know
but i would n't graduate till i was twenny eight twenny nine years old even if i made it in three years
and my brother freddie wanted to get married and i had three unmarried sisters -- in an italian home that 's a terrible thing
and my kid brother nickie he 's a one got married last week
so i just went to pieces
i used to walk inna streets till three four o'clock inna mornings
my mother used to be so worried about me
my uncle mario come over one time
he offered me a job driving his hack onna night shift
he got his own cab you know
and god forgive me for what i 'm gon na say now but i used to thinka doing away with myself
i used to stand sometimes in the subway and god forgive me what i 'm going to say i used to feel the tracks sucking me down under the wheels
yes i know
i 'm a catholic you know and even to think about suicide is a terrible sin
yes i know
so then mr. gazzara -- he was a frienda my father -- he offered me this job in his butcher shop and everybody pleaded with me to take it
so that 's what happened
i did n't wanna be a butcher
there 's nothing wrong with being a butcher
well i would n't call it an elegant profession
it 's in a lower social scale
people look down on butchers
i do n't
well the point is mr. gazzara wantsa sell his shop now because he and his wife are lonely and they wanna move out to california in los angeles and live near their married daughter
because she 's always writing them to come out there
so it 's a nice little shop
i handle his books for him so i know he has a thirty five percent markup which is not unreasonable and he takes home net maybe a hundred hundred and fifty bucks a week
the point is of course you got ta worry about the supermarkets
there 's two inna neighborhood now and there 's an a&p coming in at least that 's the rumor
of course mosta his trade is strictly italian but the younger italian girls they get married and they do n't stick to the old italian dishes so much
i mean you got ta take that into account too
it 's my feeling that you really want to buy this shop marty
that 's true
i do
but i 'm gon na have to take outta loan inna bank eight thousand dollars
that 's a big note to carry because i have to give mr. gazzara a mortgage and what i have to weigh is will it pay off in the end more than i can make onna salary
wadda you think
i think anything you want to do you 'll do well
i only got about three bucks on me now but i just live about eight blocks from here on the other side of webster avenue
why do n't we walk back to my house
i 'll run in pick up some dough and let 's step out somewhere
i really should get home
it 's only a quarter of twelve
the clock 's right over there
i really should get home i told my father
well i suppose a little while longer
i wonder if there 's any place around here i could put some makeup on
... it 's really a fine opportunity for me
but i 'm not sure i want to be a department head
it 's mostly executive and administrative work
well anyway i told you about my father and he depends on me a great deal and
why do n't you just move out to portchester
well that 's what i was saying
my father is getting old
and we 're very close
he 's a wonderful man really
i think you 're kidding yourself clara
i used to think about moving out you know
and that 's what i used to say
my mother needs me
but when you really get down to it that ai n't it at all
actually you need your father
you know what i mean
you 're living at home and you got your father and mother there and you can go on like that -- being a little girl all your life
i 'm afraid of being lonely
oh you wo n't be so lonely
you 'll make friends right away
actually i do n't make friends easily
what 're you talking about
you 're a real likeable person
you 'll make friends out there in portchester one two three
you 'll have people visiting you alla time
i 'll come visit you
i 'll borrow my brother freddie 's car or you can call me up when you feel blue or i 'll call you up
and it 's gon na be nice
do n't be so afraid
this is the kitchen
yes i know
come on inna dining room
no marty please
i like you
i like you
i been telling you all night i like you
marty
i just wanna kiss that 's all
no
please
no
please
marty
waddaya doing tomorrow night
nothing
i 'll call you up tomorrow morning
maybe we 'll go see a movie
i 'd like that very much
the reason i ca n't be definite about it now is my aunt catherine is probably coming over tomorrow and i may have to help out
i 'll wait for your call
we better get started to your house because the buses only run about one an hour now
all right
waddaya doing new year 's eve
nothing
what happened angie was that we thought we were just gon na go for a short walk and then we thought we were gon na come right back but we got to talking
listen angie i want you to meet clara
clara this is my best friend angie
i told you about him
how do you do
you got an elevator in this house
we just live one flight up
so i 'll call you tomorrow
okay
okay so i 'll see you tomorrow night then
okay
siddown siddown
you want some chicken
we got some chicken in the ice box
no mrs. pilletti
we were just going home
thank you very much anyway
well siddown a minute
i just come inna house
i 'll take off my coat
siddown a minute
it was very nice meeting you mrs. pilletti
i hope i 'll see you again
sure
goodnight mrs. pilletti
goodnight
you say something
yeah
i was just asking you if you was here stag or with a girl
i 'm stag
well i 'll tell you
i got stuck on a blind date with a dog and i just met an old girl i used to know and i was wondering how i 'm gon na get rid of the girl i 'm with
somebody to take her home you know what i mean
i 'd be glad to pay you five bucks if you take her home for me
what
i 'll take you over and i 'll introduce you as an old army buddy of mine and then i 'll cut out
because i got this other girl waiting for me out by the hatcheck and i 'll pay you five bucks
are you kidding
no i 'm not kidding
you ca n't just walk off onna girl like that
herbie
wadda you doing here
i came up to dance wadda you think
you here with somebody
i 'm just here with another girl
where you going now
i 'm just gon na get my cigarettes
i left them in my coat
i 'll see you around
i 'll see you
she was always a bit thin in the hips
well at the time she told me this she already had six
every time i saw the woman she was either
and that husband of hers is a skinny bit of a fellow is n't he
well i bumped into her on the street and she was as big as a barrel
oh that 's nice
so the doctor was wrong was n't he
oh no
she died right in the hospital
oh that 's a sad story
and her husband is that little fellow works in peter reeves
that 's the one
oh that 's a sad story
... so the whole book winds up mike hammer he 's inna room there with this doll
so he says you rat you are the murderer
so she begins to con him you know
she tells him how she loves him
and then bam
he shoots her in the stomach
so she 's laying there gasping for breath and she says how could you do that
and he says it was easy
boy that mickey spillane boy he can write
what time is it
about eight o'clock
tommy before you go i wonder if you gimme a little advice
sure what
you 're the accountant inna family and i figure you might know about these things
my boss wantsa sell his shop to me
his kids are all married you know and he and his wife live alone and they wanna move out to california where his daughter lives so he wantsa sell his shop
he wants five thousand dollars down although i think i can knock him downa four
all right i 'll see you thomas because he wants an answer by monday
sure
thanks a lot about my mother
we 'll work out some arrangement because naturally i want to pay
do n't worry about it
no listen that 's my mother i 'm gon na pay for her
boy beautiful day hey thomas
sure great if you ai n't married
tommy gimme a coupla minutes because i promised mr. gazzara i 'd let him know tomorrow
see what i wanna know tom if a buncha individual retail merchants get together how does it operate
on individual mark- ups
you know what i mean
say i 'm the butcher and aldo capelli he 's the dairyman and grocer so suppose i mark up thirty five percent but he works on forty so
waddaya talking about do you know what you 're talking about
no i do n't know
that 's why i 'm asking you
wadda you wanna buy a shop for will you tell me
you got ta good job you got no wife you got no responsibilities
boy i wish i was you boy
waddaya wanna tie yourself down with a shop
what 's he want
five thousand down
you 're gon na have to carry a mortgage sixty seventy bucks a month
a mortgage anna note from the bank
for pete 's sake you 're a single man with no responsibilities
stay that way boy
take my advice
well you see thomas i figure the big problem is the supermarkets
but patsy 's shop that 's a specialized trade
the supermarkets do n't carry italian meat
who buys italian meat anymore
you think my wife buys italian meat
she goes to the a&p picks up some lamb chops wrapped in cellophane opens up a canna peas and that 's dinner boy
well i understand the problem about the supermarkets but i was talking to this girl last night and she made the point that a likeable personality is a valuable business asset
marty see that my mother is nice and comfortable eh
sure
this girl said
what girl what does she know
why do n't you let her hold the baby once in a while
your mother boy she wantsa take the kid for a day that 's fine
hello marty when you coming home
where you now
because your cousin thomas and his wife virginia they 're here
they had another fight with your aunt catherine
i do n't know
i 'm coming home right now ma
i 'll be home in about two minutes
tell thomas stick around i wanna see him about something
so what are you gon na do tonight marty
i do n't know ma
i 'm all knocked out
i may just hang arounna house
what
i say why do n't you go to the stardust ballroom
it 's loaded with tomatoes
it 's loaded with what
tomatoes
ha
who told you about the stardust ballroom
thomas
he told me it was a very nice place
oh thomas
ma it 's just a big dance hall and that 's all it is
i been there a hundred times
loaded with tomatoes
boy you 're funny ma
marty i do n't want you hang arounna house tonight
i want you to go take a shave and go out and dance
ma when are you gon na give up
you got ta bachelor on your hands
i ai n't never gon na get married
you gon na get married
sooner or later there comes a point in a man 's life when he got ta face some facts and one fact i got ta face is that whatever it is that women like i ai n't got it
i chased enough girls in my life
i went to enough dances
i got hurt enough
i do n't wanna get hurt no more
i just called a girl just now and i got a real brush off boy
i figured i was past the point of being hurt but that hurt
some stupid woman who i did n't even wanna call up
she gave me the brush
i do n't wanna go to the stardust ballroom because all that ever happened to me there was girls made me feel like i was a bug
i got feelings you know
i had enough pain
no thank you
marty
ma i 'm gon na stay home and watch jackie gleason
you gon na die without a son
so i 'll die without a son
put on your blue suit
blue suit gray suit i 'm still a fat man
a fat ugly man
you not ugly
i 'm ugly
i 'm ugly
i 'm ugly
marty
ma
leave me alone
hello marty when you come home
we just got here about fifteen minutes ago
ma i want you to meet miss clara snyder
she 's graduate of new york university
she teaches chemistry in benjamin franklin high school
how 'd you come home ma
thomas give you a ride
oh it 's a sad business
my sister catherine she do n't get along with her daughter in law so she 's gon na come live with us
oh she 's coming eh ma
oh sure
siddown siddown
marty tell her siddown
might as well siddown a minute clara
did you offer the young lady some fruit
i offered her ma she do n't want nothing
ma i 'm gon na take her home now
it 's getting late and the buses only run about one an hour
sure
all right ma
i 'll be back in about an hour an hour anna half
sure
she 's more than twenty nine years old marty
that 's what she tells you
what ma
she looks thirty five forty
she did n't look italian to me
i said is she italian girl
i do n't know
i do n't think so
what are you talking about
she 's a nice girl
she did n't look italian to me
i do n't like her
you do n't like her
you only met her for two minutes
do n't bring her to the house no more
what did n't you like about her
i do n't know
she do n't look like italian to me
plenny a nice italian girls around
well let 's not get inna fight about it ma
so what are you gon na do tonight marty
i do n't know ma
i 'm all knocked out
i think i 'll just hang arounna house and watch
so these two girls come over to the bar
hey ang
... and they sit down right next to me
you want a beer ang
i look over at this one nexta me not bad about thirty five -- hiya marty
hiya ralph
... i been talking about two nurses leo and me picked up in a bar on seventy first street
hey lou gimme two bottles a beer
so marty lemme tell you about these nurses marty
waddaya read there joe
so marty let me tell you about these nurses
what nurses
the nurses leo and me picked up last night
we got a date with them tonight
you still owe me ten bucks from last week if that 's what you 're working up to
hello ralph
hey marty come over here a minute
hello ralph
how 'd you make out with those nurses last night ralph
oh man you shoulda come with us last night marty
that one for you was a real lunatic
how 'd you make out
your kid brother got married last sunday eh marty
that 's right missus fusari
it was a very nice affair
that 's the big tall one the fellow with the moustache
no that 's my other brother freddie
my other brother freddie he 's been married four years already
he lives down on webb avenue
the one who got married sunday that was my little brother nickie
i thought he was a big tall fat fellow
did n't i meet him here one time
big tall fat fellow he tried to sell me life insurance
no that 's my sister margaret 's husband frank
my sister margaret she 's married to the insurance salesman and my sister rose she married a contractor
they moved to detroit last year
and my other sister frances she got married about two and a half years ago in saint john 's church on kingsbridge avenue
oh that was a big affair
well let 's see now that 'll be about a dollar- seventy nine
how 's that with you
well
when you gon na get married marty
you should be ashamed of yourself
all your brothers and sisters they all younger than you they married and they got children
i just saw your mother inna fruit shop and she says to me hey you know a nice girl for my boy marty
watsa matter with you
that 's no way
now you get married
missus fusari missus canduso over there she 's inna big hurry and
my son frank he was married when he was nineteen years old
watsa matter with you
that 's swell missus fusari
you should be ashamed of yourself
all right ginnie do n't get so excited
she 's right
she 's right
young husband and wife they should have their own home
and my sister catherine she 's my sister but i got ta admit she 's an old goat
and plenty a times in my life i feel like throwing the milk bottle at her myself
and i tell you now as far as i 'm concerned if catherine wantsa come live here with me and marty it 's all right with me
that 's very nice a you aunt theresa
we got ta ask marty of course
sure
you just sit here i got ta turn the fire on under the cooking
oh he 'll get married do n't worry aunt theresa
well i do n't know
he sits arounna house alla time
you know a place he can go where he can find a bride
well there 's the stardust ballroom
that 's a kind of a big dance hall
every saturday night it 's just loaded with girls
it 's a nice place to go
you pay seventy seven cents
it used to be seventy seven cents
it must be about a buck and half now
and you go in and you ask some girl to dance
that 's how i met virginia
nice respectable place to meet girls
you tell marty aunt theresa you tell him go to the stardust ballroom
it 's loaded with tomatoes
the stardust ballroom
it 's loaded with tomatoes
right
hello aunt theresa
hello thomas
i just this minute got the baby to sleep
aunt theresa we figure the best way to ask her is you say that you 're very lonely see
and would n't she come and keep you company because that way you see
do n't worry
i 'm gon na take care a the whole thing
ma you want something to eat some tuna fish
hey why do n't you go to the movie
your mother and me we 're gon na be baby sitter
hello aunt theresa
hello thomas how do you feel
ah my mother she drives me crazy
i hadda beg her to let me drive her over here
the martyr
she always got ta be the big martyr
he coming home right now
so what happened aunt theresa about the milk bottle was my mother in- law she comes inna kitchen aunt theresa and she begins poking her head over my shoulder here and poking her head over my shoulder there so then she begins telling me how i waste money and how i ca n't cook and how i 'm raising my baby all wrong so she got me so nervous i spilled some milk i was making for the baby
she was here you know wednesday and i said catherine my sister
so she say you 're spilling the milk
so she kept talking about these coupla drops of milk i spilled so she got me so mad so i said mama you wanna see me really spill some milk
so i took the bottle and i threw it against the door
i did n't throw it at her
that 's just something she made up
she goes around telling everybody i threw the bottla milk at her
i did n't throw it anywheres near her
well i was sorry right away you know but she ran outta the house
well i do n't know what you want me to do virginia
if you want me i 'll go talk to her tonight
sure
aunt theresa you got this big house here
i mean you got this big house just for you and marty
and i thought maybe tommy 's mother could come here and live with you and marty
well
because i called up tommy 's brother joe and i said joe she 's driving me crazy
why do n't you take her for a couple of years
and he said oh no
i know i sound like a terrible woman
no virginia i know how you feel
i just ca n't stand it any more
every minute of the day
do this
do that
i do n't have ten minutes privacy with my husband
we ca n't even have a fight
we do n't have no privacy
everybody 's miserable in our house
i 'm sorry we got ta rush like this
that 's all right that 's all right
on accounta
i 'm gon na see you tonight
we did n't tell her anything yet
we thought that we 'd leave it to you
we thought you 'd put it like how you were lonely and why do n't she come to live with you
because that way it looks like she 's doing you a favor insteada we 're throwing her out and it wo n't be so cruel on her
do you want tommy and me to stay here with you
i think it be a better idea if you and thomas go out because otherwise she 's gon na start a fight with you and everybody 's gon na be yelling
that 's very nice a you aunt theresa
how 's marty been lately aunt theresa
marty i do n't know how to tell you how much i appreciate what you and your mother are doing because the kinda thing was happening in our house was virginia was in the kitchen making some milk for the baby
so my mother comes in
tommy i promised the babysitter six o'clock
tommy
i 'll see you at mass tomorrow
we 'll sit down and we 'll discuss the whole thing
do n't you think i feel lousy about this too
all right ginnie
i do n't wanna talk anymore about it
i do n't think i got one hour 's sleep the whole night
last night was the first time in my life i ever heard my mother cry you know that
tommy
i do n't wanna talk about it
i know what you 're gon na say
a man 's got ta stop being his mother 's baby sooner or later
how many times you gon na say it
she 's my mother you know
i oughta have some feelings about her do n't you think
why do you always put me inna position of being the louse
virginia i do n't wanna hear no more about it
tommy
i do n't wanna hear anymore about it you hear me
wadda you so sore about
oh shaddup will you do me a favor
what about the time she wanted to make an old fashioned italian dinner for my brother but you would n't let her
waddaya talking about
once a month you could n't let her use the kitchen
i told her she could use the kitchen any time she wanted
... you hadda be the boss inna kitchen alla time
she do n't wanna use my pots and pans
how they goin' losing preacher
what do you hear from the pope
you talked to walt
he 's parted his moorings
what do you want me to do
put in one of your fixes
walt knows he 's loused himself with the church but it 's part of our plan to make him think he has the keys to the kingdom
which he will think if you grease the skids for him
i do n't think i can give absolution to a man who 's about to commit suicide
it 's a mortal sin
what is red the intention or the act
i believe it takes both
i 'd have to look it up
just use common sense
your job is preventing sin and the way to do that is give him your best cross action
nice looking kid
going to be okay
he 'll live if that 's what you mean
but somebody better be around when he comes to and finds out there 's nothing left between his legs
what do i do with it hawk
this is a little out of my line
did n't recognize you red
when you get the clamp all the way down open it as wide as you can and see if you can close it on the artery
y'all were short a couple cutters and we 're what the army sent
do n't you know the first thing you 're supposed to do at a new post is present yourself to the commanding officer with your orders
reckon so but we been boozing all day and you work up an appetite
you 're welcome to one of these whatever they are
they give you copies to burn
good
you 've both been working close to the front
never this close
they 've hit us on cherry hill
i just got word
we have our slack periods but when the action starts you 'll have more work in twelve hours than a civilian surgeon does in a week
i may need you to go to work practically immediately
but meanwhile perhaps you 'd like to meet some of your fellow officers
just one for a start
yeah maybe move that nurse in
she do n't seem the type to keep you awake praying
i have been in this army a long time
i know just what you guys are up to
but there are limits
what are you going to do with him
well
i was going to name you chief surgeon
to consult on both shifts yours and frank 's
hey that 's great henry
good thinking
stop him
stop that man
sure you just blindfold him first and tie him to a stake
now i got you for a witness i 'm going to try again
so far all i dragged out of him is he 's from bahston and he 's only been in the army two months
where were you when they drafted you
home
i mean what were you doing
were you a resident or on a staff someplace
that 's right
where
hospital
which hospital
back home
is there any reason why we should n't know the name of it
no
or why you should
do n't you use olives
where you think you are boy
they probably never seen a olive in this country
how you walt
we was just fixing to have a nightcap
pour one for painless
miss you walt
he said it for us all walt
pulse slow very little pressure
look at that right eye
epidural hematoma
i do n't know what else
you 've been that route a little have n't you
not enough to be a pro
she had this shiny black hair piled up on her head but later on she let it hang loose and i 'll be damned if it did n't come all the way down to her ass
i 've always had a hankering for blonde pussy myself
my wife 's hair is a wonderful golden yellow and this time of year it gets even lighter
well he 's taken care of
scratch one hot dog
you really think we hurt him that bad
hell no all you did was knock the wind out of him
but he wo n't be playing any more football today
y'all mind the store
four goddam months
and they do n't even give you time off for good behavior
because is not democrash
all peoples created equal
hey you been sneaking some reading outside the frigging bible
i have great interest for america his peoples and his custom
good because we got a fine old american custom we want to teach you
you know what these are
i do n't think i should have opened my big mouth
sorry ho jon
that 's okay
live a little learn a little
you must open me up again
no ho jon we 're not going to open you up
thou
for thou art with me
welcome welcome welcome
what the hell 's going on here
this is ho jon my houseboy
our houseboy
i 'm teaching him english
where 's he gon na use that kind of talk
the valley of the shadow of death
wait a minute ho jon
i got something for you
but first will you please kindly shut the goddam door
i do n't drink intoxicants
i do n't believe it 's right for you to involve a boy who 's not seventeen years old yet
the door frank the door
where you from anyhow alaska
wisconsin
same general idea
what
when he sees a little running room he likes to make a show
you know stutter steps and cross overs and all that jazz
also he never learned to button up when he gets hit so if you two can get a good shot at him once you can hurt him
we got to stop them right here
and get ourselves another touchdown to win
i wish to hell we knew what they were plotting
you mind if we get out of this guy 's brain first
what 's there to do
you found the sliver
there might be another tiny piece we missed
i want to look around before we close up
perfectionist
my name 's hawkeye pierce
duke forrest
you got directions
ayuh only it 's early i need a drink to wake me up
i got some
make it yourself or is it real
georgia where i come from it 's real if you make it yourself
but i been buying from the yankee government since they put me in this soldier suit and give me a rate
tax free booze
it 's about all you can say for army life
where you from with that crazy way of talking
crabapple cove
maine
damn
that must be about as far north as you can get
pretty near
what do you know about the outfit we 're going to
c.o. is colonel blake
lieutenant colonel henry braymore blake
one of them regular army clowns
push you around so it 's hard to get any decent work done
we got to head them off right at the start
push them around first
what 's the initials mp stand for hawkeye
shore patrol duke
let 's go
must be the famous curb service whore house
you in the market duke
i done my shopping in seoul last night
colonel blake have no fear
hawkeye and duke are here
that 's right pal
you just sit up front and sign the mail and leave the cutting to us
little light reading matter
just right for his age
well southern boy i suppose you want the sack that 's convenient to the door
and gets the wind every time it opens
no thanks
i 'll take that one
this kid 's ready but we wo n't know all the damage till we get in and see what 's happened
what have you got
nothing ca n't wait
shall we check it out with the major
now that 's what i call real pretty
we can close up here and go into his belly
he ca n't take much more time on the table
so we got to cut him fast
i figure from the x ray it ai n't just the spleen
we also got to snatch his right kidney
christ almighty i think he means it
we been had
we 've stuck it out for a whole week now
pretty girl
we sure do n't aim to cause any trouble
yeah she seems to grow on you
no hawkeye just said it all
except we forgot one other small thing
what 's that
the chest cutter
yeah that 's right
you better get us a chest cutter before there 's trouble
this outfit needs somebody who can find his way around the pulmonary anatomy when the bases are loaded
and it 's the ninth inning
jesus to jesus and eight hands around
duke did i ever tell you how i beat dartmouth by intercepting a pass
sixteen times
we did n't have a chance little androscoggin college against the big green but there was this blizzard and we held then nothing nothing till the last twenty seconds
then this great passer of theirs let one go snow and all
this kid looks like a loser
maybe we better get the bead jiggler to put in a fix
call dago red
and you 've had a natural four times in a row in a crap game
right
does that mean
not without lots of praying and kissing the dice
it 's a different ritual but it works the same
what do you think trapper
y'all just act natural
get out the scotch ho jon
do n't mention the sex thing unless he brings it up
that there frank burns is a menace
whenever a patient croaks on him it 's either god 's will or somebody else 's fault
this time he did it to a kid who 's simple enough to believe him
why do n't you dump the mother henry
he creates more work than he gets done
hail to the chief
we all got a responsibility men
he 's crowned like a king ought to be but he ca n't just walk to the mess hall by himself
he has to be carried by native bearers
good thinking duke
how about it ho jon
can you round up a few of the boys
never mind
forget it
a native is someone who is born in a particular place
when will he be able to write
what 's he got to write for god 's sake
an application to androscoggin college
i guess that 's why you go for hot lips houlihan
you know damn well i nearly puke when i look at her
i do n't even think she 's a real blonde
how can you say a thing like that about an officer in the united states army
i not only say it i 'll back it up twenty buck 's worth
you got yourself a bet georgia boy
you 're a witness
how come nobody knows about him
and you do
i worked with spearchucker my first month over here at the 72nd evac in taegu
most of the colored guys know who he is but they 're not talking because he asked them not to
now wait a minute hawkeye
i come a long way learning to put up with a couple of crazy yankees but
do n't tell me about your problems boy
explain them to ho jon
look at the size of those two beasts
i do n't think i could hurt one of them with a sledgehammer
do n't try to get it far down
kick it up high so we can get there and surround that son ofa bitch
yeah if i can
me too
y'all just seen me play my last game
same here
you can retire my number
henry 's got our orders
we 're going home
when
any time
whenever we want
be right with you
there 's no transportation anyway this time of night
we could steal one of the choppers
i looked
suspicious bastards got them all locked up
i thought we were heading for trouble putting on all these trinkets
we got to start rehabilitating duke if we want to be halfway human by the time we get back to our wives
but no short arm inspection
i 'm with you there
screw it
we been earning our keep as respectable knife artists
why should we do work any pill rolling punk could handle
there 's no point appealing to colonel blake
they 've got him bewitched
no
the only thing to do is write general hammond
but it 's hard to find a place around here for a private discussion
i have a tent to myself
people will talk
i do n't mind
if we give them something to talk about
i think it 's a marvelous letter
we 're a good team
we think the same way
it 's supper time
but you 're not hungry are you
ravenous
what about you
well sure if you are margaret
anyway we want to get this letter off
godless buffoons all of them
it 's that disrespect for you that 's what i ca n't forgive them
oh i 'm used to it
what makes me sore is how they behave towards you
they ought to be grateful to have you
i certainly am
and i 'm grateful for you frank especially with those boors around
we 've grown very close in a short time
frank
do n't stop now
please
wait a second
i ca n't
could n't
is that liquor
finest kind
we 're training ho jon to be a bartender
join us
give us this day our daily
you ever caught this bread and forgive our syndrome before duke
... trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against
... and for our young men on the field of battle that they may return home to their dear ones
come clean with us frank
were you on this religious kick back home or did you start to crack up here on the post
... and for our supreme commander over here and our commander in chief in washington
the hell we wo n't
you bastards pulled something i do n't know what but we 've been beating you without him
ane we 'll go on beating you
you willing to b back that up with odds
damn right
three to one as much as you want to put up
gimme three
at ease
captain pierce you have a seriously wounded patient for whom you are responsible
yet i find you in a poker game
you betcher ass dad
what
pierce
that soldier requires immediate attention
i 'm a surgeon and i know
you betcher ass general
i 'm going to play poker until three a.m. or until the patient is ready for surgery
however if you 'd like to operate on him yourself right now be my guest
i get the same dough whether i work or not
i want to talk to you pierce
there 's nothing to talk about general
you take the case yourself or join me at three o'clock
either way you 're liable to learn something
now general i 'm going to sandbag you
do you think we 're ready to get out of this belly
obviously you do n't think so and i do n't know why
well dad we have n't found any holes in the large bowel
they 've all been in the small bowel but the smell is different
i caught a whiff of large bowel but it ai n't staring us in the face right
right
so if it ai n't staring us in the face it 's got to be retroperitoneal
and that along with the look of the wounds makes me figure he 's got a hole in his sigmoid colon that we wo n't find unless we look for it
and there it is
i 'm impressed pierce
naturally the kind of job i have i do n't get much chance to keep up with what goes on in the or
neither does henry blake
but i 'll tell you what makes him the best c.o. you 've got in any of your hospitals
he leaves all the medical decisions to the men who do the day- to day work and understand what meatball surgery is
well it 's still pretty much in the talk stage
we had a team at the 325th evac last fall
i coached the boys myself
i think i heard about that
now we 're working out a schedule of the outfits we 're going to play this year
we all chip into a pool and make bets
must be fun
but the point we want to make about henry
i 'm sure we could find a date for your team
why do n't i take it up with henry
thanks for the drink boys
i only wanted to know what she 's like in the sack
do those big boobs hold up or are they kind of droopy
hawkeye 's asking the major 's opinion on a point of anatomy
also i 'm curious whether she 's a moaner or
what for
we need medical officers for short- arm inspection starting the first afternoon out
oh certainly sergeant
my name is captain george limburger and this is captain walter camembert
c a m e m
b e r t right
see you tomorrow
oh i 'm not sailing with you
i work out of the hospital here
i think i 've seen this nut somewhere
have n't i
if you do n't know what you 've seen why should i
that 's the front up the road a few miles
we have to get by without some of the comforts of home
i like an olive
lucky you did n't have your mouth open or it would have gone down your throat
he 's trapper john
only man in history who ever found fulfillment in the ladies can of a boston and maine railroad car
when the conductor caught him in there with his winter carnival date she screamed he trapped me
what have you been doing since those days trapper
what are they peeking at
captain waldowski in the shower
part of him
painless is the owner and operator of the pride of hamtrack
that 's where he comes from
hamtrack michigan
... but i turned in my knee pads
ho jon give the father some more martini
black capsule
the black capsule
finest kind
thank you dr. mcintyre
we 're throwing him a last supper
we came to invite you
the painless pole plans to cross the great divide tonight and we need your help to straighten him out
it 's a bedroom where a man is always at his peak and does n't have to take any time outs
and all the angels are built like lieutenant dish
very well your majesty
congratulations frank
he picked you
no no that one
oh you want to play it straight
i guess i owe you an apology
i came within about ten yards of you
you know something trapper the way we been going if we ever got to see a real golf course again i bet we could burn it up
as far as the greens maybe
i do n't know if my putting would come back or not without some practice
i 'm not so sure the goddam thing 's in his heart
course it is n't but how many chances do we get to go to japan
with our golf clubs
let me translate
i 've had some exposure to the language
the young man is from brooklyn and he wants us to vacate this vehicle
but were n't you supposed to meet the surgeons who are going to slice up the congressman 's son
but besides the operation we 've got to get in at least eighteen holes of golf
so let 's haul ass sergeant
look
beautiful
what do you think
should we stop and play nine holes now and operate on the kid later
if he 's still alive
do n't worry son
that 's captain mcintyre and he 's the best chest surgeon in the far east and maybe in the whole u.s. army
he 'll fix you up fine
your daddy saw to that
just like we thought it 's a routine problem
nurse who 's in charge of operating room preparations
come on trapper
we got to forget golf for today
i do n't know why
as long as it 's light enough to see your caddie
what 's the age of consent in this country
is he out
like the rock of gibraltar
best thing you could do for all of us is grab some sack time
radar
for you trapper
okay but i 'll need you to help
duke will you take that belly back there
the australian
it 's in pretty deep
yeah and he 's lost a lot of blood
i 'm afraid it 's hit more that just the lung
christ it 's ho jon
hiya ho jon
you got a piece of a shell in your chest but we 'll take it out as soon as you 've had more blood
hey radar
if we squeeze him through i 'm going to get him into androscoggin college
how about squeezing him through into dartmouth
if all he wants to do is catch lobsters he can learn that here
dartmouth 's too big and too expensive
if he 's as good as i think he is he can move into the big league later
but androscoggin first
we 'll need room
the sixth rib goes
never mind the conversation
do it dad
you aspirate the blood from the chest cavity
damn there 's more of it than i thought
if we do n't get that pint he 's in trouble
i do n't feel anything
oh jesus
but he 's got five times the man power to draw on
we can balance that by getting ourselves a ringer
henry has to say he needs a neurosurgeon and put in a specific request for dr. oliver harmon jones
he only lasted one season
on account he got caught in the doctor draft
he was a surgical resident playing semi pro ball weekends when the eagles signed him
so what makes you think he 'll play for us
we 'll cut him in on the bets we make
and still have enough profit to send ho jon to college
might make kind of a social issue not having any other negro officer
he can move in here with us
but we 'd have to break his leg or something to keep him out of the game for good
not necessarily
captain pierce would i be imposing
honey nobody as pretty as you could ever impose
please sit down
coffee
captain i 've been observing the nurses on your shift
but naturally your own opinion is more informed than mine
i 'm glad you feel that way major because you see it 's a team effort
doctors nurses enlisted men
and i feel responsible for my whole team and i want you to know i 'm satisfied with them
all of them
that 's right
we work well together
major burns is far from satisfied
that do n't surprise me
if you 're a good observer you must have observed by now that frank burns is a jerk
on the contrary i 've observed he 's not only a good technical surgeon he 's a good military surgeon
and that includes how a man dresses and how he bears himself and his sense of what it means to be an officer in the united states army
and his track record that do n't count
look honey when you watch the two shifts try to notice which one does the most work with the least fuss
i 've noticed that both nurses and enlisted men address you as hawkeye
it 's my name
maybe that sounds silly to you but
that kind of familiarity is inconsistent with maximum efficiency in a military organization
okay major honey
i 'm going to have a couple shots scotch and go to bed
i 'd normally ask you to join me but obviously you 're a female version of the routine regular army clown
and that turns me off so just leave my outfit alone and we 'll get along fine
see you around the campus
i wonder how a degenerated person like you could have reached a position of responsibility in the army medical corps
sister if i knew the answer to that i sure as hell would n't be here
hey knocko i got those pictures you promised to look at of my kids
you too wilma
it wo n't take a minute
you can see them too if you want
no thank you
i 'm not the slightest bit interested
listen we look pretty lousy out there right
well for college players that have been out of training seven or eight years
i 'm thinking about how we can make more money
suppose we bet only part of our dough and keep this big animal out of the game the whole first half and let them roll up some points
then you could bet the rest of our bundle between the halves and get the general and his friends to give us some real odds
see you
it 's possible
hang in there
is n't this ridiculous doctor
six months i 've been here and there are still times when i ca n't stand it
i just go to pieces
there 's nothing ridiculous about it
a kid like you
thank you captain pierce
it 's been so long
no trouble at all
hawkeye
how did you get called that
the last of the mohicans
only book my father ever read
you 're getting a workout you and captain forrest your first night
it is n't always this rough
oh no
we have dull stretches every week or so thank god when there 's nothing to do after midnight
they do n't have to be dull
i mean if you and me put our minds together
our minds
for a start
i just have a hunch
well it is n't entirely a hunch
you 're an attractive man
you have a certain modest charm yourself
but i 'm married
something else we have in common
very happily married
same here
and absolutely determined to be faithful to my husband
do we have that in common captain
it 's a matter of definition
faithful in spirit yes
i do n't make the distinction
but the sex urge is a powerful force
in women just as much as men
ayuh
you 'd think now with only six weeks before they ship me back home it would be easier
but it is n't
of course not
it 's terribly hard
sometimes the temptation is just too much
then why not as long as it would n't hurt anybody
but you 've made me feel strong again captain
hawkeye
you helped me pull together when i needed it
even if i were n't
maria
i could n't have slept tonight anyhow
you 're leaving tomorrow
in less than twelve hours i 'll be on my way
that 's when the real strain starts
three weeks on a troopship
poor baby
dear sweet hawkeye
though i guess who it 'll really be rough on is your husband
you 're on his side all of the sudden
a man would be more considerate
he would n't come home to his wife a nervous wreck
how would he avoid it
as if i needed to ask
it could be a purely impersonal thing
what matters is the therapeutic value of relieving your tensions
you should have been a marriage counselor
but i 'll show you what 's wrong with your theory
do you think anything between us could be impersonal
or pure
you better forget logic because you 're proving why i should n't go to bed with you
i did n't mean with me
you 're asking for somebody else
it happens to be a matter of life and death
a man is going to die if he does n't have my fair young body
precisely maria
tonight you have the same privilege that comes on rare occasions to the chief executive of some state or nation
the privilege of restoring life by one tender act of mercy to a doomed fellow creature
two man job
how much blood has he had
second pint
duke
it was really nice of you to take me along
i did n't have much choice
you really say the cutest things
yeah
captain camembert
captain camembert
excuse me sergeant
yes reverend
what do you want with those two medical officers
they 're supposed to hold short arm inspection
be the longest short arm inspection you ever held
thanks reverend
thank you both for tipping me off
you do n't know a captain forrest or a captain pierce do you
they missed the boat
thanks
glad to help
he 's the pro from dover and i 'm the ghost of smokey joe
save that crap for the rest of the clamdiggers back home
the real trapper john
the one who threw you the famous pass and went to greater glory on the boston and maine railroad
the one and only
proud to know you trapper
like to shake your hand if you 'll hurry up and get that chest closed
you still working the trains
you do n't go after the local scrunch
i 'm too busy actually
not for the army of course but where i live
dr. yamachi 's new era pediatric hospital and whorehouse
i 'm serious
the guy has this crude hospital for kids and a whorehouse on the side to finance it all in the same building
what do you do in the joint besides pimp
that 's about the only thing i do n't do that i 'm built for
i inspect the girls and take care of some of the kids in the hospital
sometimes i tend bar and act as bouncer
glad to know you
drop in at my clinic anytime you feel like playing a little poker or even if a tooth is bothering you
poker sounds great
when do you play
if a man is n't a man anymore what 's he got left to live for
tell me the whole story walt
there 's this native broad works in the laundry
i do n't know if you 've noticed
there 's only one worth noticing
you noticed
i was n't going to fool around over here
i 've got these three girls i 'm engaged to back home
but i had this feeling i ought to make the effort
to test myself
and i flunked
what did you have to test for god 's sake
the dental don juan of detroit
don juanism is just a cover
i 've been reading up on it
i 'm a fake i 'm a fraud i 've been living a lie
painless you must n't talk that way
it 's a lot of crap
cover for what
homosexuality
now i know that 's been my problem since i was a kid
but it only caught up to me last night
you 've been drawn to other males
since you were a kid
no never in the slightest
just in dreams
or in dreams either
i repressed it completely
classic pattern of inhibition
that 's what you 've been doing all these years with every dame you could lay your hands on
repressing your real self
but it 's all over now and i ca n't face it
imagine if you found out you were one you would n't like breaking the news to your wife
well i got the same problem multiplied
you do n't have any problem
you 've got thirty good years ahead of you easy
maybe you 'll have to cut down as you grow older get along with just two fiancees but
no one thing i finally know for sure i 'll never function with a woman again
that 's really what i came here for
see what you guys recommend
well i 'm sure my colleagues will agree there are a number of dependable measures for extinguishing the vital forces
in the direction you want to go
you guys got any black capsules
how much time do i have
just about enough to say goodbye to everybody
line up over here men if you want to pay your last respects
keep moving and file on out when you 're through
i wonder if red 's fix swings it for me what 's heaven really like
officer all sleep now yes
and i go wash clothes
right ho jon
see you later
hi ho jon
how they goin'
finest kind
captain forrests say you better haul ass home quick
we got new chest cutter in our tent
there ought to be a law against dentists reading
matter of fact i thought there was
anyway this is an obsession
he ca n't be persuaded out of it
he 's comin this a way
the jaw- breaker
and if i go to new york the natives there will carry me
i do n't think so
i do n't think so either
pain bad ho jon
i would n't wish it on a maneating shark
i 'm colonel blake
you fellows just passing through
nope we 're assigned heah
the blonde dish
if you mean
she is a lieutenant in the army nursing corps captain
okay lieutenant dish
i guess she 's already
involved with somebody here
they 've all tried
nobody 's got to first base
you do n't aim to cause any trouble but
but we strongly suspect something will happen to screw up this splendid organization of yours if you do n't get that sky pilot out of our tent
your tent
about that chest cutter
i 'll try d d dammit
you ca n't ask any more than that
we do n't want any more than that
right now
stop acting like a colonel henry
you know trapper would n't sock him without a good reason
there 's no reason good enough for one medical officer to strike another
i should fire him because he got in the way of trapper 's fist
no
i 've put up with a lot from you guys but now i finally have to take disciplinary action
christ
all of a sudden it 's west point
first decent idea you 've had in a month
now i 'll have to wait at least a week
if i announced it tomorrow after what our new chief nurse saw this afternoon they 'd hear her yelling from seoul to washington
fifteenth straight day there 've been six o'clock choppers
how long can a battle go on
you got to relax henry
since the deluge started you been working in the or and running the outfit too
it 's a nice idea
i mean it has style
it 's the only way we can make enough to put ho jon through androscoggin
what 's going on
who started this
you mean who hit who
yes that 's what i mean
i did
first and only blow
so far
if you say so henry
but remember my claustrophobia
i deeply regret this unfortunate incident
we try to remember we 're a military organization
o'reilly
yes sir
dammit radar wait till i call you
tell major burns
one of the surgeons from the day shift will have to stay on duty tonight
yes dammit and
o'reilly what is it
there are n't more choppers coming
i 'm afraid so colonel
we 've got too many wounded for us to handle now
get on the phone right away and
yes sir i 'll see if i can reach general hammond in seoul for you
you think he 'll finally break down and give us two more surgeons
sir
do n't do that radar
you make me nervous
sir
do n't come so quickly when i call
i want you to take these officers
to major burns tent
yes sir
stop that o'rielly
sir
oh get out of here
yes colonel
good morning colonel
morning radar
how were things
splendid sir
no problems
morning captain
can you make out what they 're talking about
i can try sir
chopper coming in colonel
two of them i 'm afraid
damn
and another one but it 's from the south
there
if i can make a suggestion coach
the way i run an organization any man in it has the right to speak his mind
in that case here are ten basic plays
i think that 's about all this bunch can handle
thank you spearchucker
i 'll certainly take a look at these
where the hell did you ever get that name
i used to throw the javelin
morning girls
good morning major
good morning
this one goes right to the or
tell duke to do him ahead of the busted spleen
and this kid ca n't wait
i 'll take him myself before i get to that ruptured diaphragm
captain
this kid is a prisoner of war
yeah
it 's an american boy 's rupture you 're supposed to close
listen we get a deluge like this just deciding priorities on a medical basis is hard enough
so never mind the side issues
okay i 'm closing up
everybody relax
may i have the surgeon 's name please
planes mostly
may take a crack at rickshaws
how does the direct approach work over here
i been out of action since i got over here five months ago
what 's the bastard really like
colonel merrill is a veteran of twenty- five years in the regular army a soldier first and a doctor second
a member of several patriotic organizations he believes it 's america 's god given mission to maintain a foothold for freedom on the asian mainland
that bad
but i guess you 're right
we might as well see him
got any caddie carts
never mind
the address of the n.e.p.h. and w. why do n't you meet me there when you 're through golf for drinks and dinner and whatever strikes the fancy
mine 's already been struck and it does n't have to be very fancy
soup
rice
what are we doing beginning all over again
no we had a clear soup to start
this is a thick one and you ought to taste it
there 's nothing like it back home
how can i taste it now
we 've already had like twelve courses
can you guys take one minute to look at a kid for me
now
ease off on those tapes and let 's see how much it bleeds
how is he
nice
boys we 're home free
as long as there 's a pile up we can do our bit to encourage his permanent withdrawal from the contest
it 's a technique ugly john and i worked out in case something like this came up
you 're a couple o sticks shy in your column ann
a big rich slob like d. b. norton buys a paperand forty heads are chopped off
did you get it too
yeah
you too
oh joe
oh i 'm sorry darling
why do n't we tear the building down
before you do ann perhaps you 'd better finish this column
yeah
lavender and old lace
er would you er would you like to make some money
yeah maybe
would you be willing to say you wrote that letterand stick by it
oh i get the idea
yeah maybe
huh
are you all right
yeah i 'm all right
do n't mind the colonel
he hates people
he likes you well enough to stick around
oh that 's 'cause we both play doohickies
i met him in a box car a couple o years ago
i was foolin around with my harmonica and he comes over and joins in
i have n't been able to shake him since
action
um hum
now look john
here 's the speech
it 's in caps and double spaced
you wo n't have any trouble reading it
not nervous are you
no
of course not
he would n't be
who
john doe
the one in there
who
john doe the one in the speech
oh
yeah
you know something
i 've actually fallen in love with him
say he 's a friend of mine
never mind
let him alone
he 's all right
i 'll be right over there pulling for you
hello john
hello
look john
something terribly important 's happened
they 're forming john doe clubs
we know of eight already and they say that there 's going
john doe clubs
what for
uh huh
to carry out the principles you talked about in your radio speech
i do n't care what they 're forming
i 'm on my way and i do n't like the idea of being stopped either
oh but you do n't know how big this thing is
you should see the thousands of telegrams we 've received and what they 're saying about you
look it started as a circulation stunt did n't it
uh huh
well you got your circulation
now why do n't you let me alone
oh it started as a circulation stunt but it is n't any more
mr. norton wants to get back of it and sponsor john doe clubs all over the country
he wants to send you on a lecture tour
me
uh huh
can i help you pack
no thank you
do you care if i sit down out here
no
you know i had a crazy dream last night
it was about you
about me
sure was crazy
i dreamt i was your father
but here 's the funniest part of it all
i was the fella up there doing the marrying
you know the justice of the peace or something
you were
i thought you were chasing me
well yes i was
but i was your father then see
but the real me john doe er that is long john willoughby i was the fellow up there with the book
you know what i mean
i guess so
then what happened
well i took you across my knee and i started spanking you
how many people do you think we 've talked to already outside the radio i mean
i do n't know
about three hundred thousand
three hundred thousand
what makes them do it ann
what makes them come and listen and and get up their john doe clubs the way they do
i 've been trying to figure it out
look johnwhat we 're handing them are platitudes
things they 've heard a million times love thy neighbor clouds have silver linings turn the other cheek
it 's just a
yeah i 've heard them a million times too butthere you are
maybe they 're like me
just beginning to get an idea what those things mean
did you write this
yes i did john
but ii had no idea what was going on
you did n't
go ahead driver
ball park
john please let me go with you
please john
er this john doe idea is yours huh
yes sir
how much money do you get
thirty dollars
thirty dollars
well er what are you after
i mean what do you want
a journalistic career
money
money
well i 'm glad to hear somebody admit it
do you suppose you could write a radio speech that would put that fellow over
oh i 'm sure i can
do it and i 'll give you a hundred dollars a week
a hundred dollars
that 's only the beginning
you play your cards right and you 'll never have to worry about money again
oh i knew it
hello
whenever there 's a pretty woman around er this is my nephew ted sheldon miss mitchell
how do you do
thank you very much for everything
and miss mitchelli think from now on you 'd better work directly with me
yes sir
better let me talk to him
all right but present it to him as a great cause for the common man
oh
go ahead open it open it
tomorrow night before a crowd of fifteen thousand people and talking over a nation wide radio hook up john doe will announce the formation of a third party
a third party
yes
the john doe party
devoted entirely to the interests of all the john does all over the country
which practically means ninety per cent of the voters
he will also announce the third party 's candidate for the presidency
a man whom he personally recommends
a great humanitarian the best friend the john does have
mr. d. b. norton
hello
john
i 'm so glad to see you
ii was terribly worried
hello there
well well
if it is n't the man about town
all set ann
huh
oh yes
let 's go
now let 's see
we want some action in these pictures
that 's good
no no no
this man 's going to jump off a roof
oh
here
wait a minute
let me comb your hair
sit down
there
that 's better
stick a fork through me
i 'm done
i 'll never get this speech right
oh yes you will ann dear
you 're very clever
yeah i know
what are you looking for
your purse
i need ten dollars
what for
i gave you fifty just the other day
yes i know dear but mrs. burke had her baby yesterday
nine pounds
and there was n't a thing in the houseand then this morning the community chest lady came around and
and the fifty 's all gone huh
who 's the ten for
the websters
the websters
you remember those lovely people your father used to take care of
i thought i 'd buy them some groceries
oh ann dear it 's a shame those poor
you 're marvelous ma
you 're just like father used to be
do you realize a couple of weeks ago we did n't have enough to eat ourselves
well yes i know dear but these people are in such need and we have plenty now
if you 're thinking of that thousand dollars forget it
it 's practically gone
we owed everybody in town
now you 've just got ta stop giving all your money away
oh i 'm sorry ma
oh do n't pay any attention to me
i guess i 'm just upset about all this
gee whiz here i am with a great opportunity to get somewhere to give us security for once in our lives and i 'm stuck
if i could put this over your mrs. burke can have six babies
do you mean the speech you 're writing
yeah i do n't know
i simply ca n't get it to jell
i created somebody who 's gon na give up his life for a principle hundreds of thousands of people are gon na listen to him over the radio and unless he says something that 's well that 's sensational it 's just no good
well honey of course i do n't know what kind of a speech you 're trying to write but judging from the samples i 've read i do n't think anybody'll listen
what
darling there are so many complaining political speeches
people are tired of hearing nothing but doom and despair on the radio
if you 're going to have him say anything why do n't you let him say something simple and real something with hope in it
if your father were alive he 'd know what to say
oh yes father certainly would
wait a minute
huh
i 'll tell you what i 'll do
i get thirty dollars a week
i 'll take twenty five twenty if necessary
i 'll do anything you say
it is n't the money
we 're after circulation
what we need is fireworks
people who can hit with sledge hammersstart arguments
oh i can do that
i know this town inside out
oh give me a chance please
no
i 've had the whole army and navy searching for you because that 's a game we play here every day
i remember distinctly being fired
that 's right
but you have a piece of property that still belongs to this newspaper
and i 'd like to have it
what 's that
the letter
what letter
the letter from john doe
oh
the whole town 's in an uproar
we 've got to find him
the letter 's our only clue
there is no letter
we 'll get a handwriting expert to what
there is no letter
say that again
there is no letter
i made it up
you made it up
uh huh
you said you wanted fireworks
well the whole town 's curious about john doe and boom just like that you 're going to bury him
there 's enough circulation in that man to start a shortage in the ink market
in what man
john doe
what john doe
our john doe
the one i made up
look genius now look
suppose there was a john doeand he walked into this office
what would you do
find him a job and forget about the whole business i suppose
not me
i 'd have made a deal with him
a deal
sure
when you get hold of a stunt that sells papers you do n't drop it like a hot potato
why this is good for at least a couple of months
you know what i 'd do
between now and let 's say christmas when he 's gon na jump i 'd run a daily yarn starting with his boyhood his schooling his first job
a wide eyed youngster facing a chaotic world
the problem of the average man of all the john does in the world
now then comes the drama
he meets discouragement
he finds the world has feet of clay
his ideals crumble
so what does he do
he decides to commit suicide in protest against the state of civilization
he thinks of the river
but no no he has a better idea
the city hall
why
because he wants to attract attention
he wants to get a few things off his chest and that 's the only way he can get himself heard
so
very pretty
very pretty indeed miss mitchell
but would you mind telling me who goes on christmas eve
john doe
what john doe
the one we hire for the job you lunkhead
wait a minute
wait a minute
lemme get this through this lame brain of mine
are you suggesting we go out and hire someone to say he 's gon na commit suicide on christmas eve
is that it
well you 're catching on
who for instance
anybody
er erbeany'll do
okay sister you get your job back
plus a bonus
what bonus
i can read
i can read
sorry
so you think this is worth a thousand dollars do you
oh the chronicle would consider it dirt cheap
packs everything including a gun
okay sister you 've got yourself a deal
now let 's take a look at the candidates
the one we pick has got ta be the typical average man
typical american that can keep his mouth shut
looks all right
he 's perfect
a baseball player
what could be more american
i wish he had a family though
that 's our man
he 's made to order
i do n't know
he do n't seem like a guy that 'd fall into line
when you 're desperate for money you do a lot of things mr. connell
he 's our man i tell you
hurry up pop
oh
right here
sit down
all right boys here he is
no no no
you ca n't take pictures of him like thateating a sandwichand with a beard
but he 's gon na jump off a building
yes but not because he 's out of a job
that 's not news
this man 's going to jump as a matter of principle
well maybe you 're right
we 'll clean him up and put him in a hotel roomunder bodyguards
we 'll make a mystery out of him
did you speak to mr. norton
thinks it 's terrific
says for us to go the limit
wants us to build a bonfire under every big shot in the state
oh swell
is that the contract
yes
what 's he doing here
friend of his
they play duets together
duets
but can we trust him
oh
and you
start pounding that typewriter
oh boy
this is terrific
no responsibilities on our part
just statements from john doe and we can blast our heads off
before you pop too many buttons do n't forget to make out that check for a thousand
awwwww
yeah but it 's got everybody sore
ads are being pulledthe governor 's starting a libel suitwhat 's more they all know john doe 's a phoneyand they insist on seeing him
well what about it
let them see him
we 'll go them one better
they can also hear him
you own a radio station mr. norton
why not put him on the air
look
we ca n't let 'em get to this bush league pitcher and start pumping him
good night
no telling what that screwball might do
i walked in yesterdayhere he is standing on a table with a fishing pole flycasting
take my advice and get him out of town before this thing explodes in our faces
if you do mr. norton you 're just as much of a dumb cluck as he is
excuse me
no you 've got yourself a meal ticket and you hate to let go
sure it 's a meal ticket for me
i admit it but it 's also a windfall for somebody like mr. norton who 's trying to crash national politics
that 's what you bought the newspaper for is n't it
you wanta reach a lotta people do n't you
well put john doe on the air and you can reach a hundred and fifty million of 'em
he can say anything he wants and they 'll listen to him
what 's the idea
no no no
now that 's too much
listen
if that guy lays an egg
i want to get something out of it
i 'm getting a jane doe ready
that 's fine honey
now get out
now listen annhe ca n't possibly get in without our seeing him
i 'm watching the side door and the colonel 's out front so stop worrying
thank you
how many is that six
pretty hungry were n't you
say all this john doe business is batty if yuh ask me
well nobody asked yuh
trying to improve the world by jumping off buildings
you could n't improve the world if the building jumped on you
oh stop worrying
he 's all right
that 's
had any schooling
yeah a little
what do you do when you work
i used to pitch
baseball
uh huh
till my wing[4 went bad
where 'd you play
bush leagues mostly.[5 med
shot to include the rest of them
they have their eyes glued on his face
ann is very much interested
i went up to miss mitchell 's house boss
boy she 's in a bad way
where is she
hey do you know something
she supports a mother and two kids
what do you know about that
did you find her
no
her mother 's awful worried about her
when she left the house she said she was going on a roaring drunk
er the girl i mean
go out and find her
sure
hey but the biggest thing i did n't tell you
hello
yeh
her old man was doc mitchell
you know the doc that saved my mother 's life and would n't take any money for it
you remember that
okay boss i 'll go and look for her
just called the morgue boss
they say there 's a girl there
shut up
ann
say why did n't yuh
beany
hey boss
get a load of this
what
look
what do they want
they all say they wrote the john doe letter
yeah boss
take charge of him
get him a suite at the imperial and hire some bodyguards
gee whiz boss you know mr. norton told me not to leave him not even for a minute
go on go on go on
and we 'll be at jim 's bar up the street
hey wait a minute mr. doe
tubby
help yourself
naw
i 've seen guys like you go under before
guys that never had a worry
then they got ahold of some dough and went goofy
the first thing that happens to a guy
hey did yuh get a load of the bedroom
hey whatsa matter with a bank account anyway
and let me tell you long john
when you become a guy with a bank account they got you
yes sir they got you
who 's got him
the heelots
who
and when they get you you got no more chance than a road rabbit
hey
who 'd you say was gon na get him
hey doc look
look doc
gimme that again will yuh
who 's gon na get him
the heelots
who are they
listen sucker yuh ever been broke
sure
mostly often
all right
you 're walking alongnot a nickel in your jeansfree as the windnobody bothers youhundreds of people pass yuh by in every line of businessshoes hats automobiles radio furniture everything
they 're all nice lovable people and they let you alone
is that right
holy smoke
a half a heelot
there you are boss just like you ordered
symbols of the little people
well i 'll be doggoned if over forty people do n't show up
course none of us knew what to do but we sure got a kick out of seeing how glad everybody was just to say hello to one another
tell him about making sourpuss chairman honey
oh yeah
we made sourpuss chairman and decided to call ourselves the john doe club
and say incidentally this is my wife
come here honey
grubbel 's here
see
yeah
that'sthat 's him
of course you do n't know grubbel but he 's the man that everybody figured was the worst no account in the neighborhood because he was living like a hermit and nobody'd have anything to do with him
er that is until murphy the postman told us the truth
why grubbel he says he lives out of garbage cans because he wo n't take charity
because it 'd ruin his self respect he says
just like you said on the radio mr. doe
you do n't have towhy we 're with you mr. doe
we just lost our heads and acted like a mob
why we
what bert 's trying to say iswellwe need you mr. doe
there were a lot of us did n't believe what that man said
this is sourpuss
er excuse me
er mr. smithers mr. doe
ththat 's all right
if you did n't call me sourpuss it would n't feel natural
there are snickers from the background
well anyway ii guess nearly everybody in the neighborhood came except the delaneys
the delaneys live in a big house with an iron fence around it and they always keep their blinds drawn and we always figured that he was just an old miser that sat back counting his money so why bother about inviting him
until grimes the milkman spoke up and he said say you 've got the delaneys all wrong
and then he tells us about how they cancelled their milk last week and how when he found a note in the bottle he got kinda curious like and he sorta peeked in under the blinds and found the house empty
if you ask me he says they 're starving
old man delaney has been bringing his furniture over to my place at night one piece at a time and selling it
and then we started to find out about a lot of other people
yeah sure
er you know grubbel for instance
well sir about a dozen families got together and gave grubbel a job watering their lawns
is n't that wonderful
and then we found jobs for six other people and they 've all gone off relief
yeh
er and my boss mr. schwabacker made a job in his warehouse for old man delaney
no
well thank you for listening
goodbye mr. doe
you 're a wonderful man and it strikes me you can be mighty useful walking around for a while
that man is gon na be on that roof
do n't ask me how i know
i just know
and you know it as well as i do
sure sure
i 'd like to believe in fairy tales but a guy that 's fake is n't gon na jump off any roof
hey pretty nifty huh
you ai n't gon na get me to stay here
sure you are
no sir
that spot under the bridge where we slept last night 's good enough for me
gimme mine
i ai n't staying
you know we were headed for the columbia river country before all this john doe business came up
you remember that do n't yuh
sure
i remember
say did your ears pop coming up in the elevator
mine did
aw long john
i tell youit 's no good
you 're gon na get used to a lotta stuff that 's gon na wreck you
why that fifty bucks in your pocket 's beginning to show up on you already
and do n't pull that on me neither
stop worrying colonel
i 'm gon na get my arm fixed out of this
hey stop worrying colonel
fifty bucks ai n't going to ruin me
i seen plenty of fellers start out with fifty bucks and wind up with a bank account
you win colonel
here 's the fifty
go on out and get rid of it
you bet i will
as fast as i can
gon na get some canned goodsa fishing rod and the rest i 'm gon na give away
i got ta figure some way out of this thing
the elevators are still runnin
yeah she 's a heelot just like the rest of them
it 's lucky you got away from her
what was i doin' up there makin a speech anyway
me
huh
gee the more i think about it the more i could
tear down all the fences
why if you tore one picket off of your neighbor 's fence he 'd sue you
five thousand bucks
i had it right in my hand
jitterbugs.[9 close shot john and the colonel
yeh
say how much money we got left
four bits
better make it doughnuts huh
yeh
yeah but it 's got to be by bone- setter brown
okay bone setter brown goes
here sign it
meanwhile here 's fifty dollars for spending money
that 's fine
beany
hello mr. connell
hiyah john
john i want to have a little talk with you
what 's the matterare you falling
come here
no i never read the speeches before i make them
i get more of a kick out of it that way
uh huh
that 's exactly what i thought
beany go on down to the office tell pop to give you the speech
there 's a copy on my desk
now that 's all right is n't it
you betcha
i get mad for a lot of other guys besides myselfi get mad for a guy named washington
and a guy named jeffersonand lincoln
lighthouses john
lighthouses in a foggy world
you know what i mean
yeah you bet
listen palthis fifth column stuff 's pretty rotten is n't it?[11
yeah
it certainly is
and you 'd feel like an awful sucker if you found yourself marching right in the middle of it would n't you
you must be wrong mr. connell 'cause he 's been marvelous about the john doe clubs
yeah
say you 're sold on the john doe idea are n't you
sure
sure
i do n't blame you
so am i.
all right
now supposing a certain unmentionable worm whose initials are d. b. was trying to use that to shove his way into the white house
so he could put the screws on so he could turn out the lights in those lighthouses
what would you say about that
huh
nobody 's gon na do that mr. connell
they ca n't use the john doe clubs for politics
that 's the main idea
is that so
then what 's a big political boss like hammett doing in town
and a labor leader like bennett
and a lot of other big shots who are up at d. b. 's house right now
wolves john wolves waiting to cut up the john does
wait till you get a gander at that speech you 're gon na make tonight
you 're all wet
miss mitchell writes those speeches and nobody can make her write that kind of stuff
they ca n't huh
who do you think writes 'em
my aunt emma
i know she writes them
well i do n't get it
huh
get what
look d. b. i 'm supposed to know my way around
this john doe movement costs you a fortune
this convention 's gon na cost plenty
well
well i 'm stuck with two and twobut i 'm a sucker if i can make four out of it
where do you come in
whyuh
i see
i 'd better stick to running the paper huh
i think maybe you 'd better
and connelli'd like to have the john doe contract all the receipts for the money we have advanced him and the letter miss mitchell wrote for which i gave her a thousand dollars
yes
sure
only one thing to do hank
drop the whole business quickly
how
run a story
say john doe was in here and is sorry he wrote the letter and
that 's right
you got it
sure
he came in here and i made him change his mind
bulletin editor saves john doe 's life
why it 's perfect
i 'll have ned write it up
oh ned
miss mitchell do me a favor will you
go on out and get married and have a lot o babiesbut stay out o newspaper business
better get that story in hank it 's getting late
if you ask me hank you 're playing around with dynamite
no no no the gal 's right
we ca n't let the chronicle get the laugh on us
we 've got to produce a john doe now
amateur journalism huh
i 'll show those guys
show me an american who can keep his mouth shut andi'll eat him
okay beany bring 'em in one at a time
wipe to montage half a dozen different types of hoboes appearand in each instance ann shakes her head negatively
did you write that letter to miss mitchell
no i did n't
what are you doing up here then
well the paper said there were some jobs around loose
thought there might be one left over
look mr. norton i think you 've got a lot of nerve having those people hold us here
there 's nobody holding you here mr. doe
it 's only natural that people
well if there 's nobody holding us here let 's get going
incidentally my name is n't doe
it 's willoughby
why certainly
with your ability to influence people it might grow into a glorious movement
say let 's get something straight here
i do n't want any part of this thing
if you 've got an idea i 'm going around lecturing to people why you 're crazy
baseball 's my racket and i 'm sticking to it
come on colonel let 's get out of here
is there anything wrong
oh no
nothing 's wrong
everything 's fine
so there 's gon na be a new order of things huh
everybody 's gon na cut himself a nice fat slice of the john does eh
you forgot one detail mr. big shotyou forgot me the prize stooge of the world
why if you or anybody else thinks he 's gon na use the john doe clubs for his own rotten purpose he 's gon na have to do it over my dead body
now hold on a minute young man
hold on
that 's rather big talk
i started the john doe clubs with my money and i 'll decide whether or not they 're being properly used
no you wo n't
you 're through deciding anything
that 's a lie
it 's not a lie
nickels and dimes
to stuff into their own pockets
you can read all about it in the newspapers there
that 's a lie
listendon't believe what he says
let go of me
this man had no intention of jumping off of the top of a building
he was paid to say so
do you deny that
that 's got nothing to do with it
were you paid for itor were n't you
yes
i was paid
but the
and what about the suicide note
you did n't write that either
what difference does that make
did you write itor did n't you
no i did n't write it but
ah you bet your life you did n't
you look in your papers ladies and gentlemen and you 'll find miss mitchell 's signed confession that she was the one that wrote it
listen folks it 's a fact that i did n't write the letter but this whole thing started
there
you see
he admits it
you 're a fake john doe
and for what you 've done to all these good peoplethey ought to run you out of the countryand i hope they do it
it 's good to see you
sit down
thanks
it 's for ann
oh how nice
thank you very much
flowers
i 'm terribly sorry she is n't here
she is n't
no she just left
i 'm surprised you did n't run into her
she went over to mr. norton 's house
oh
did you want to see her about something important
yeah
i uh well
no
it 'll wait
say he 's a nice man is n't he
mr. norton i mean
he 's er he 's done an awful lot for the
well i guess i 'll see her at the convention later
yes of course
i 'll see that she gets the flowers
thanks
good night mrs. mitchell
good night john
pretty good
say i was just about ready for the major leagues when i chipped a bone in my elbow
i got it pitchin a nineteen inning game
nineteen
yep
there was a major league scout there watching me too
and he came down after the game with a contract
do you know what
i could n't life my arm to sign it
but i 'll be okay again as soon as i get it fixed up
that 's too bad
what do you mean too bad
huh
oh that you 'll never be able to play again
well what are you talking about
i just told you i was gon na get a
well you know how they are in baseballif a guy 's mixed up in a racket
racket
what do you mean
well i was just thinking about this john doe business
why as soon as it comes out it 's all a fake you 'll be washed up in baseball wo n't you
y yeah
gee doggone it i never thought about that
gosh
and another thing what about all the kids in the country the kids that idolize ball players
what are they gon na think about you
close shot of the colonel
he has dropped his gloveflopped into a chairand has taken out his ocarina
i know one way you can do it
how
well when you get up on the radio all you have to do is say the whole thing 's a frame up
make you a hero sure as you 're born
yeah but how am i gon na get my arm fixed
well that 's a cinch
i know somebody that 'll give you five thousand dollars just to get up on the radio and tell the truth
say who 's putting up this dough
feller runs the chronicle
here 's the speech you makeand it 's all written out for you
have you got the speech i gave you
yeah
now look
i 'll give this money to the colonel just as soon as you get started
we 'll have a car waiting at the side entrance for you
okay
spencer of the chronicle
hold him
yes mrs. brewster i 'm listening
yes spencer
who
the governor
well what about me
it 's my building he 's jumping off of
and i 'm up for re election too
shh
what are you doing
get connell at the bulletin
why he 's liable to go right past my window what was that
what
out the window
something just flew by
i did n't see anything
well do n't stand there you idiot
go and look
open the window
oh why did he have to pick on my building
is there a crowd in the street
no sir
then he may be caught on a ledge
look again
i think it must have been a sea- gull
a sea gull
what 's a sea gull doing around the city hall
that 's a bad omen is n't it
oh n no sir
the sea gull is a lovely bird
i it 's all right mrs. brewster
it was just a sea gull
er
nothing 's happened yet
no i 'm watching
do n't worry
ju just leave it all to me
no -- you ca n't do that
you got 7 hostages in there 1 of them 's wounded -- we do n't know how bad it is -- the guy ripped the phone out -- swat said he 's got a gun to the head of a female hostage
if swat makes entry now you 're gon na lose 1 hostage maybe 2
i got ta go in
maybe i can see what 's going on in there
i do n't know
he 's never offed anybody
his rap does n't show any violence
not that we know of
we do n't know how much time we have
if i can get in to talk to him -- maybe we wo n't lose anyone
maybe we can get a throw phone in there
floor seats
you 're my hero
dinner 's on you
deal
mind if we make a stop on the way
we busted frank antonucci on possession
he gave us a lead on that polk street jewelry heist
phoney frank
do n't waste your time
he 'd tell you his granny was in on the kennedy assassination if he could dodge a collar
i still got ta do it
wasting time is half my job
yeah okay
this swat guy might be a good idea
he may be able to take a little pressure off you
i worry about you
you worried about me too
the chief 's worried about me
solis is worried about me
maybe you guys should start some kind of organization
speaking of which
i saw you talking to ronnie this morning
why ca n't you get it back together with her
you 've got ta be out of your mind not to get with that one
it 's not me
it 's her
she 's going out with this baseball player -- greg barnett
no shit
he 's good
fuck him
he swings at anything in the dirt
i could strike him out
do n't give up on her
you 're getting to the age when you ought to be thinking about these things
where 's the stereo
fuck the stereo
what 's that smell
come on
just get in
we got ta go
apartment 306
you want me to go up with you
nah it probably wo n't turn up anything
i 'm just gon na talk to him
good
i do n't want to be late
what 's the line
it was warriors plus 6 this morning
i 'll take half of your action
who is it
it 's lieutenant sam baffert from the san francisco police department
where did you find an old recording like that
used record shop down on turk street
i was in there looking for some robert johnson
memories
memory lane or something
i 've got to stop in there
mr. korda do you know frank antonucci
you mean frank who owns the bakery down the street
could i please have a little water
of course
perhaps for his own reasons he entangled me in this
situation
this cousin of yours
what 's his name
clarence teal
you told antonucci that shit came from me
so that we could get the best price
he 's got respect for you
he 's gon na try to lowball me mike
you fucking idiot
why do you think i use you
to be a walking advertisement
i 'm sorry mike
i never heard of lamarra flipping on anyone before
he said he had the cops paid off
antonucci never flipped on anyone before
he had the cops paid off
not the fucking cop that showed up at my door
what happened mike
you do n't want to know
god damn it
i still needed to case that fucking store
it 's too risky to show my face now
i got a couple thousand bucks
you could leave town
leave town
they 're going to know me in fucking des moines now
they got over ten million in jewels in that place
that 's freedom man
i could go anywhere i want
you got ta do this for me
i 'm in here because of you
man what 's this about
ya know you were robbing a store
it was n't personal
it was his job
fuck you
you know what he did to me
do n't make do it mike
are you going to turn on me too
who helped you when you were strung out
who gave you money
who bailed you out of jail
i wo n't get away with it
nobody knows who you are
make it look like a robbery
this has nothing to do with walter
they want walter dead
tell me what 's wrong
particles man
i feel them all the time
i feel them in my arms and legs man that 's how they punish me
how can i help you with the particles
it 's not just the particles man it 's the whole fucking machine this is how they get assassins to operate
it 's been this way since the cuban missile crisis
they have less power over you if you look into my eyes
huh
tell my dad
tell him what what do you want me to tell him
tell my dad i 'm sorry about the watch
i 'll tell him
where does he live
we 'll get him on the phone right now
i hate fucking springfield
is that where you 're family lives
where 's the car
i need to get something straight first
it 's my job to see that no one gets killed earl
including you
then where 's my fucking car
really
absolutely
bank robbers are generally your smartest criminals
manual or automatic
automatic
you got it
who are you again
johnny hawkins
bail bonds
i got ta be over at county in fifteen minutes alright
johnny who
hold on a second here
is there a problem
you signed out twice
i what
look why do n't you just come on back inside for a second
wait a minute lemme see that
hi roper
hi kimura
where 's the command post
the suspect came in shortly after the bank opened
botched robbery
a teller hit the silent alarm
he took seven hostages
shot one -- the guard
he 's still alive
so far he 's asked for
... a car
that 's right and a plane waiting at the airport
if he does n't
... get 'em he 's going to start shooting hostages in five minutes
that 's right
what 's the suspect 's name
earl
we got a guy who 's probably on drugs
he 's got a record of 459 's and he was busted on possession
but he 's never been busted on a major felony
what 's his demeanor
well he 's a little fucking agitated -- he ripped the phone out
i have to go face to face
anything on korda so far
solis said to keep you clear of this
alright roper
you want to come
come
good
i wo n't be armed
we got ta operate on trust here
we 're going to wrap this up and have you guys out of here as soon as possible
are you in charge roper
yep
i want a car
like a four wheel drive
i want it in perfect condition
i want a uniformed cop to drive it up right here
i want him to leave the engine running and walk to the end of the street
then we 'll come out
i do n't want any remote control devices in it
i know all the tricks
if it 's not in perfect condition and i mean if its even low on wiper fluid i 'm going to kill somebody and we 're gon na start again
i want a plane waiting at the airport
i 'll tell them where i want to go when i get there
is that all
for now that 's all
you 'll get it
but joe i want you to do something for me
let me take a look around inside
make sure everybody 's okay
no
you just do shit for me right now
joe i 'm doing a lot for you
i think you could give me something to cement the deal
one hostage
i 'll give you something
you ca n't kill me like this
what if you and me got into a struggle
and my gun went off
open your shirt
i 'm not wearing a wire
this is just between you and me
shut the fuck up and do what i say
satisfied
open the bag dump everything on the table
it 's all there
spread it out
do n't go reading my lips man
that 's an intrusion
save that shit for the sniper school
comprende
sorry
habit
we 're already past it are n't we kevin
if you say so
you ever been in a hostage situation
only at the very end
how do you feel after a shooting
like it had to be done
it rarely has to be done
i 've rarely shot anyone
swat is a lifesaving unit you know
i know
try to remember that
what 's the point of this
a little exercise in lateral thinking
the obvious solution is n't always the only solution
see you tomorrow
i 'm sorry about your friend
i had a friend in swat killed
i know how it can be
i appreciate your concern
let 's leave it at that
so mccall how come you ended up in san francisco
they recruited me
promised me fast advancement
recruited you from where
national marksman competition
with your qualifications you must have had a lot of offers
why here
furthest point i could find from new york
you do n't like new york
spent my whole life there
i just wanted to get out for a while
you 'd never been out of new york
been to toronto
my mother was born there
how did you like toronto
it was okay
you 're a real excitable sort are n't you
you caught me on an up day
how about you
how did you end up in san francisco
i grew up in oakland
crossed the bay bridge and here i was
so you 're looking for fast advancement
is there something wrong with that
i 'm not sure
how are we gon na get him out of there
we could fill it with water
you got a girlfriend
why
you like my ass
you would n't want to put a small wager on this would you
i do n't gamble
yeah i 've got a girlfriend
you living together
she 's back in jersey
going to graduate school
explain how that works
she 's going to come here when she graduates and then we 're gon na get married
she grow up in livingtston too
no no no
she 's from hoboken
oh city girl
do n't you ever long for companionship with her such a long way away in new jersey
we see each other every couple of months
every couple of months huh
that 's a lot of commitment
i admire that
do you really
no
actually i think it 's fucking crazy i do n't know if i could do it
thanks for clearing that up
i hear your former girlfriend is going out with greg barnett
where did you hear that
around
barnett 's tough competition
yeah well that 's a sore subject and therefore out of bounds to a young sprout of a hostage negotiator under my tutelage
lesson two dead eye
should have been lesson one
never exchange yourself for a hostage
i think i can handle that one
yeah you think so but it comes up
you think you can learn mccall
i think so
first things is do n't say what 's going on
everybody knows what 's going on
i come into this situation i say i 'm glad to see nobody 's hurt
that 's good
i 'm here to help you
second you hesitated
do n't hesitate
if you 're thinking talk while you 're thinking or else he 's going to think you 're plotting
which you are
if he thinks you 're plotting you 're going to make him nervous
you do n't want him nervous
got that
no
it 'll come
try again
tell me what you need
i need you to bring me the scumbag who ran off with my wife so i can cut off his nuts
if you want to be a successful negotiator you 've got to learn to lie
i 'm not good at lying
get good at it
it 's against my nature
you know the ten commandments
yes
what 's the first commandment
thou shall have no other god before me
you tell me
thou shall not kill
you 've killed right
yes
why
to save lives
so why would you hesitate to lie to save lives
my name 's mccall
i 'm unarmed
okay stop
what did you see
a dirtbag behind the counter holding a sawed off
a berretta nine millimeter in his belt
a female hostage red dress on the floor in front of the cereal display
male hostage jeans and blue checked shirt three feet to her right
another male hostage white pants green shirt nikes laying in front of the magazine rack
a female dirtbag with a gun under her shirt sitting against the beer cooler trying to pass herself off as a hostage and there 's a special on toilet paper four for a buck twenty nine
why did he do it
because he knew the little girl had zero chance of survival and his chances would be a little better
we had a plan but swat opened up too early
he got caught in the crossfire
let 's move on
notice this
always use the eyes to keep the connection
it almost like hypnosis
that 's the most important thing
create a connection
you 're always on their side
you know why i like the track
you 're a compulsive gambler
see the favorite
tail up
washy
he does n't want to run today
cross him off
now the six looks good
on his toes
coat shiny
this trainer jockey combo does well
we ca n't leave him out
what do you think
i have two words for you
seek help
i have three words for you
ex ac- ta
ronnie
yeah so
now she 's going out with greg barnett
so what do you want
an autograph
i do n't know why she 'd pick him over you
i 'm just practicing my lying
still needs work
you 're right
i 'll never be as good a liar as you
the 6 horse is last
that 's okay
that 's his style
to run last
to run late
the 6 horse is still last
he 'll be running at the quarter pole
they need to run first and second
yeah first and second
come on russell
who the fuck 's russell
the jockey
come on russell
we won
we lost
we won
how much you wanna bet
you want to bet on whether you won your bet
this is getting sick
how long you been coming here
about six years
my partner took me
is it always like this
occasionally you lose
he 's got the girl
damnit
what the fuck is going on
i do n't know but i 've got to get on there
you 're crazy
pull up alongside
it might have happened no matter who was up there
bullshit
would it have happened to you
maybe
there 's one thing you have to remember
you do n't create the situations
you can only try to save people from them
i thought i could do it
i was so damn sure of myself
but i did n't know what to say
the words would n't come
my mouth turned to mush
you make it look so easy roper
but it is not
it 's not easy
it 's a different job than looking through the rifle scope
that it is
how many have you lost
i look at it as how many i 've saved
that 's the way you 've got to look at it
and what about the ones you do n't save
you live with it
and they haunt you
it does n't leave
and what if you ca n't live with it
you 've got to decide that for yourself
he 's gon na kill her no matter what
if i take him these jewels he 's gon na kill me and her
so what do you want to do
that 's a chance i got ta take
then we better get moving
but there 's no way we can get the jewels out of evidence
mare island is an abandoned shipyard cranes high buildings
he 'll be in place where he can see everything
how are we going to get me in there
good question
mccall you all right
i 'm okay
korda
went down the side of the building
stay put
roper
metro division
hostage negotiator
give me the short version
husband came home
found that guy and his wife in flagrante
now he 's holding her at knife point
which apartment
i ca n't leave ray
it 's part of my negotiator 's oath
once i 'm in the room with the hostage i have to stay
you do n't want to see what i 'm going to do to her
let me show you something ray
same thing happened to me man
she cheated on me but i forgave her
you know why
i ai n't interested in your life story
because i was partially to blame
i was n't around as much as i should have been
i forgot how to love her
she 's the one to blame
not me
ray think about how she looked when you married her
think about how happy you were
do n't lose that man
do n't give up everything
what am i giving up
i 'm laid off last year
i 'm down to my last unemployment check
i 'm out on the streets looking for work and this bitch is banging some asshole in my bed
ray if you walk out of here with me i 'll get you a job
doing what
cleaning toilets
i ca n't guarantee you what it will be
but i swear on my life i 'll find you work
and why the fuck would you do that for me
not for you ray
for me
a close friend of mine was killed this week
the way i figure it i stop you from doin' what you said i 'm one up on body count
who the fuck are you mother teresa
my name 's scott roper
this baseball player you 're going out with
he 's no good for you
really
he 's a wonderful guy
he makes two million a year and he worships me
i worship you
you worship yourself
ronnie forget this what's his name
greg
did you know he 's already got a bad knee
in another 10 years you 're going to be pushing him around in a wheelchair
you know what i think
i think you only want me now because i 'm with somebody else
who cares what you think
i want you back and that 's all that matters
let me take you out tomorrow night
pleeease
i 'm going out with greg tomorrow
this greg is really getting in my way
please
i 'm begging you
oh i 've got to get a shot of this
that a new picture
about 4 months old
i 'm working in a new style
i wo n't stay long
i had to talk to someone
you do n't usually talk to anyone when you 're hurting
it was my fault
i was right downstairs
i should have gone up with him
scott you ca n't save everyone
i 've proved that did n't i
oh hell forget it
this wo n't work
what do you want from me
something i guess i ca n't have anymore
do n't try to make me feel guilty
the whole time we were together you went out of your way to prove you did n't need me
now suddenly for one night you need me again
i ca n't do it
i ca n't be more than your friend
because i know what will happen
in a few weeks you 'll be back on top and you 'll shut me out just as soon as you do n't need me again
you think i did n't need you
if you did you never showed it
ronnie
i wanted to get this out of the way
you got a bet on the game tonight
as a matter of fact i do
it 's already started
i was going to catch the last half on tv
that kind with the garlic and the oil that i like so much
no
the kind from kraft with the macaroni and the cheese
i 've been craving that stuff all week
and it 's hard to get
what do you think
mmm needs a little something
what are you talking about
this is it
this is the stuff right here
well maybe just a pinch more sugar
yeah that 's it
why do n't you just stick your finger in and stir it up
scottie
scottie remember the day you lost that hostage in union square
you came over that night and we made mad crazy love
but i did n't even know what happened
til i heard it on the news the next morning
it 's because i wanted to keep you away from that world
it 's not that world
it 's your world
it 's part of who you are
veronica it 's not easy for me
i do n't know if i can change overnight
but what i 'm telling you is that i want to share everything with you because i do n't ever want to be without you again
you like this place
it 's very nice
i guess you realize that there 's something special that i want to talk to you about
there is
for the last week things have been going pretty well between us
i think we 've been doing a good job getting intimate and all that stuff
yeah
... let me just show you
how come in those foreign movies the young girl is always with some fat old guy
in europe women find older men very sexy
korda escaped
and you think he 'll
i do n't think you 're old and fat enough for me
use your imagination
why do n't you come back up with me ronnie
i think i 'll stand out here in the sun
scottie scottie
it 's all over babe it 's all over
scottie
hmm
i 've been thinking
hmm
things have been going pretty well between us have n't they
yeah
you 've changed you know
i do n't think there 's anything you ca n't do once you put your mind to it
i was just thinking
there 's something special i want to talk to you about
i think it 's time we went to a whole other phase in our relationship
a deeper level
a deeper level
that 's right
we 've got to bare it all
here and now
'cause i think i 'm finally ready to go for it
whoa
wait a minute ronnie
hold on
i know it 's beautiful here
the sun the sand the sea and all that nature shit can really get to you
but we 've got to keep our perspective here
this place is n't real
this is n't reality
scott
i mean i said this trip should be a roadtest
... the hell are you talking about
i 'm talking about
what are you talking about
i 'm talking about me n you stripping down on this beach and gettin you know
naked in tahiti
you talkin about gettin nekked
shit i thought you were talkin bout you know
the m word
you thought i was talking about getting married
you crazy
with all those people around
know what you are
you 're a prude roper
the hell i am
prude
first you want me to put on one of those skinny ass bathing suits -- tongs or thongs or whatever you call them -- with my butt cheeks wrapped around a piece of dental floss
no way
... at the top of the stretch it 's cozy girl in front with backtrack coming on
cozy girl by a length backtrack closing
come on
stay up there cozy girl
it 's cozy girl holding on
cozy girl and backtrack
i 'm en route
e.t.a. in five
stay up there girl
cozy girl in front by a neck
now a head
where 's the damn wire
here comes the wire
and
backtrack gets up in the last jump
cozy girl a very game second
shit
what if you die and no one can do what you do as well as you do it
your concern is heartwarming
it 's been decided that you take on another partner and train him to be able to take over for you
is that what the guy in the sunday school suit is doing outside
his name 's kevin mccall
every metro captain agrees that he 's their top sharp shooter and most likely to succeed
great send him to the marines
this guy 's not a negotiator
he 'll quit in two weeks
you let us worry about that
is there going to be an expression of your appreciation
what kind of appreciation are we talking about
the financial kind
i figure i 'm going to be working extra hours
all sorts of overtime
training sessions
not to mention the extra stress
what do you think would be in order
like ahh
i do n't know
five thousand dollars
okay i think i could swing that
and a car
hey you just got a five thousand dollar raise
get a car of your own
you know you 've got nothing but cars down there in impound
impound is n't a rent a car company
the car is part of the deal
what happened to your trans am
repoed this morning
i 'll provide you with transportation
and even if this does n't work i want all the money
these swat guys do n't have the temperament
they do n't have the background
the chief says to tell you how sorry he is
he knew sam baffert was a good man
he said he was just going up to talk to him
he said
i want to be put on this case
i ca n't do that
i want to be put on this case
you know i ca n't assign you to this
you 're much too close to it
you were much too close to sam
the department will take care of it
who 's running it
roper
who 's running it
kimura and glass will head the investigation
what do we got
32 minutes ago the silent alarm went off then the fire alarm
a unit was a block away and the suspect got trapped inside
any verification on numbers
we 've only seen and talked to one suspect
he calls himself joe
there 's two jewelers two salespeople the manager a security guard and an elderly woman
this particular store is where they do a lot of jewelry making and repair
they have anywhere from 8 to 10 million in raw stones on any given day so they sure as shit did n't just wander in
they knew what they were coming for
what have you promised them
just that i 'd talk to my superiors
are these yours
yeah they are but
come on
this is halden
halden how nice to hear your voice
what do you want
i have found in life that what one wants is n't nearly as important as what one needs
what do you need
i need to take back what 's mine
system 's running on auxiliary
only seven hours before it crashes
true
you 're in there
everybody dies you go with them --
-- but do n't you remember
i 'm already dead
it 's okay
okay
it 's all been transferred
why
to live forever
she said i have a son
no she said she had a son
in a dream she once called life
how come i ca n't remember
because i took it out of your memory
why --
-- because there 'll be no remorse
not in my world
as long as it 's not what 's your sign
if you could meet god what would you say to him
that 's a strange question
you a strange man
there you are sitting next to the creator what do you say
this is how you pick up women --
-- no
your life that bad
no not me i 've been lucky
but i 've seen what happens to other people --
-- if your life 's so good up there gena what are you doing down here
who are you
someone who believes in miracles
you do n't have much sex up there in the real world do you
no
it 's all here
yes
the guests are here
guests
just like you always wanted
but this is impossible
that 's the grace of this world
nothing 's impossible
what 's happening
nothing go back to sleep
it 's time to wake up
wake up
from the dream
the patterns were moved around but they were n't changed
true
but why
divinity
yes
you are not a god
in here i am
god creates man man creates technology technology creates god
end into beginning
in a computer program
the new world
it 's not real
not real
you were the one who was dying
yes
you sealed off the system
when it crashes everyone dies with you
yes but only in the dream they call life
dream
and all dreams no matter how appealing must eventually end
unlimited energy out there
enough to run this world for all eternity --
-- but you 'll never be able to get it through the maze
me
of course not
that 's why you 're here
with the energy from the net we can program this world anyway we want
redwood forests
oceans
mountains --
-- two million people plugged in here
yes
until you 're on the net where the corporation ca n't touch you you ca n't open the system
they 'll eject it if you do
one would assume so
but once the system touches the net all links are severed
everybody dies
only up there in the dream they called life
and down here --
you sure he 's going to come
it 's his nature
but what if he does n't --
-- he will
how long till we can eject
we 're going to have to reconfigure
how long
at least a day
have communications contact all interface centers
tell them due to high demand we 're at full capacity and so temporarily there 's no room for anyone else on the system
what about the customers with reservations
have the staff apologize profusely and issue credit vouchers
but remember it 's a capacity problem
that 's all
the maze has been changed --
-- he says the maze has been changed
i need to know for sure
where you plugged in from
new york
i 'm south dakota
what
the weather
what 's her name
who
the woman you 're stuck on
there is no --
take care
take care
where the hell are you going --
does n't make sense
how the hell does some fucking teenager get to the keys
sorry i just design the maze
keeping the keys secure is your job
two maze runners
someone sends the kid a copy of the access program then runs the maze at the same time the kid does using the same codes
wo n't be time if he gets access --
-- he wo n't
he had access to the keys --
-- yes
we can be there in fifteen minutes and rip him off the system
go
you 're jumping to conclusions
he 's not plugged into the system
he 's in the fucking system
try harder
christoph had spinal cancer
his body kept rejecting gene therapy
he was desperate
it was him it was n't us --
-- i saw the program
corporate fingerprints all over it
of course they are
christoph was stealing every piece of code he could get his hands on
and you were n't involved
one condition
what
the truth
what is it
the terrace
first building christoph ever programmed for us
a hotel
it 's not used for anything
christoph was a brilliant programmer but very eccentric
he insisted it be kept vacant
why
he would n't say
christoph was in charge of designing building modules
that 's right
then what 's with all the staffing programs in his account
good question
be a hell of a lot easier to digitize a real person then strip them down to a module you can use to make as many employee programs as you need
yes in theory i suppose that would work
who did he digitize
listen to yourself
digitization
you know that officially that 's a pure fantasy --
-- who did he digitize
what did he tell you
the truth
not his style
katie was digitized
then you had her killed
why would i do that
to hide the evidence
need the disk back
insurance
insurance
if she 's alive you get it back
what brings you inside
cleaning up a mess
some things never change do they
i 've got to get back
tanner
someone you have to get back to
no
i 'm sorry sir we need your debit card before we can issue a credit --
-- katie
you went to my high school
no
then how do you know about --
-- you told me
what are you talking about
most nights you wake up crying
never knowing why
who are you
we worked together on the inside
you were on my programming team --
-- the inside
night city
you said we were on the same programming team
yes
but i do n't know anything about programming
once they digitized you they added it
why
it was a test
for what
to see how long it would take for me to realize
realize
you were n't real
and it meant something
yes
what
way you kiss me
i was n't with you
i know
but you were with me
not you
a copy
what 's the difference
i 'm sorry
sorry
there was no other choice
care to tell us how you came into possession of an illegal access program
look i 'm doing mute till i have a mouthpiece here who 's on my side
you do n't need a lawyer
we found the program on your laptop
it was just there
there
my uni net account
i log on
the program 's there
just like that
just like that --
do n't know what you 're talking about
of course you do
and the only shot you 've got of keeping your ass from sinking in a sea of shit is to tell me where you got this program
voice activate
activated
program name
resurrection
describe program function
transmit copy of program via satellite north uplink
destination
tanner eighteen six two nine
checking connection
connection approved
ready to transmit --
-- transmit now
access granted
male or female
male
waiter busboy maitre de --
-- waiter
standard modern upscale --
-- standard
scanning body type
program name
resurrection
he 's on us
wait a second
what time is it
it 's passing over earth as we speak
trajectory coordinates are 009843
billy that 's brilliant
we get ivan into the comets path--
we can't break free
impact in eight seconds
alpha
is there any way we can defeat this monster
any way at all
... perhaps there is a way
i have heard tales of another power
it 's far too dangerous
zordon would never allow it
if we do n't try zordon wo n't survive
ay yi yi yi
the legend speaks of a master warrior who lives on the planet phaedos
this is the only person who knows the secrets of the power
how can we reach phaedos
rangers
i 'm afraid you 're too late
what
zordon
he 's gone
is this
food
they 're called squirbs
in the language of the nathadians nin stands for man jetti stands for animal
ninjetti man and animal together as one
now put your hands inside the flame
yeah right
it will not harm you
wow
sand
now tell me
what do you see
aisha you are the bear stalwart and bold
stylin
i heard that
i 'll be at the observatory sunday
... what 's happening to him
outside of his time warp he 's aging at a vastly acellerated rate
i can hardly walk
i 've never been this sore in my life
we 've come all this way for a rock wall
there should be a way to open it
release the power with the power
i 've got it
we use the mirrors to reflect the light back into itself
saber tooth tiger
white tiger
let 's teach these vermin a few manners
activating power beam
that 's pretty bad
thank you dulcea
for everything
release the power with the power
what does that mean
1600 m.p.h
and increasing
everybody hold on tight
we 're gon na send this sucker into oblivion
in a place that came to be known as angel grove
the chamber has been accidently uncovered
you must return it to the depths
or anyone should open it and ivan is released
to assist you i have retro fitted your helmets with new opti scan devices
use extreme caution rangers
you are dealing with an evil here that is beyond all comprehension
alpha my sensors tell me the rangers were too late
ivan is on his way here
hey nobody enters the command center without a power coin
... alpha i am deeply concerned about the rangers
i told them it was too dangerous but they would n't listen
... we must try to communicate with them
it is said that to those who possess the power
all things are possible
where did it originate
in another time another dimension
it was brought here long ago by the nathadians a people who are now all but extinct
they built an impenetrable stone monolith to store the power and keep it from their enemies
for thousands of years beings from all over the universe have tried to obtain it
all have perished
i see
a fox
close
billy you are the wolf cunning and swift
it is said that once you 've reached the power
you have only ten triacs to release it
what 's a triac
about twenty seconds in your time
pterodactyl
triceratops
you okay
i think so
i am the wolf cunning and swift
i am the crane agile and sublime
of course
the power is of another world
another dimension
we've got ten triacs before we're toast
ninja crane zord
ninja wolf zord
... nothing
release the power with the power
new power coins
our morphers are on line
two thirty three a.m.
ryan 's comet
three degrees off the comets trajectory
give it everything we've got
009843
42
41
we're in alignment
there 's the comet
... not bad
listen we appreciate your hospitality but we really do n't have much time
let 's go after him
ultra ninja megazord complete
i 'm in
let 's fly
the stealth eagle is about to fly
ditto for the swooping swallow
be the eagle
be the eagle
be the swallow
be the swallow
the earth was hurtling toward us at seven hundred miles per hour and we knew at that moment that we were facing death straight in the eye
we could smell it 's breath
bulk
why do n't we give mr. peep here a chance to think it over
a stellar idea skull
here you go
no pushing
there 's enough for everybody
uh
that 's classified top secret confidential undercover information
if we told you -- we 'd have to kill you
there goes the neighborhood
a real shame
skull
bulk
and how do we release the power
the legend goes that you release the power with the power
we never liked the cheesedongs in the first place
couldn''t stand them -- low class all the way
and did you catch a whiff of their breath
it 's like having a conversation with a couple of onions
not to mention
hey boss
what kind of landing was that
these clowns are a menace to the sky
as soon as we 've taken over the world i 'm gon na change my name to sir mordant
or how about major mordant
how about major moron
just shut your gap
did i say anything
i 'm outta here
wait for me
get off me
but i'm your cousin
second cousin three times removed
now get off me
taking over the world is one thing
it 's finding good help to run it for you that 's the killer
you want me to place a few calls
simon says
quack like a'duck
what
you forgot to say simon says
the boys are back in town
go ivan
mordant go with them and report back to me
you know boss i 'd really like to help out but i 've got this gastronomic condition which rules out all space trave--
that 's right
and then we threw one of them off a mountain and another one into a raqing river
so they 've been destroyed
basically
what do you mean basically
well
we were about to finish them off
when this huge monster came out of nowhere
did these sticks make a whistling sound
how 'd you know
dulcea
that miserable manipulating loathsome she devil of a witch
what is that
feast your eyes upon the exoskeleton of the barbaric hornitor
keep digging
the dreadful scorpitron should be close by
once i have my ecto morphicon machines up and running i shall annihilate angel grove
and then
the world
is n't this just typical
we finally do somebody a good turn and just look what happens
from now on it 's e v i l no exceptions
i hope those rangers put that lousy lowlife out of his misery
go power rangers
that was a cheap shot
we could n't have done it better ourselves
anybody see them
activating power scope
how the heck
what 's going on
six become one
the combined forces of the ninjetti
strength in numbers
i am the mighty ape
and i am the falcon winged lord of the sky
three seconds
let 's do it
you own a hotel sir
the bismark in chicago
you familiar
what you 're sayin makes a lotta sense
ya know if i keep on killin people like i have i wo n't have no more friends left
you 've got the public upset al
but you know i never killed nobody that did n't deserve it
when the people get so upset our politician friends got ta listen
what are ya tellin me charlie
we 're asking you to go to prison
but i 've never served a day
if it was n't important for everybody we would n't ask
we got friends in philly
they can send you up for a couple months on a weapons charge
awwh charlie
minimum security
you 'll have everything but broads
so chicago 's been good to ya
i do right by johnny torrio and he does right by me
ya still owe me fifty bucks for the train ticket
and a lot more
can we talk
sure
what 's with the brick wall
since colosimo bit it i got ta keep an eye out for his friends
one fuckin year ago i had ta hit you up for train fare
now i can buy the fuckin train
and i ai n't even a fuckin sicilian
but ya got a boss
torrio ai n't like them guys
he thinks like an american
you 'd like him charlie
he 'd like you
maybe
but he 'd still be the boss
i 'm bobby clowes
kansas city
charlie luciano
you ever been near a meat packing plant
my father makes a couple million per but the smell in his office is enough to make you puke
got the same problem with my pop -- garlic
nothin' you can do
the goddamned bastards
tell me about it
i remember reading a poem in college
sicily
poor noble isle
poor yeah
but not you
maybe you better hear what i got to say first
whatever you say boss
no al
whatever we say
we 're all bosses here
we don need another
why should you be payin me when we 're all equals
you scare me charlie
maybe that 's why i 'm the boss
are you frightened
why should i be
i had everything
once
so what happened
life knocked me back
i came into this world flat on my ass
and now you have everything
no
not everything
up down
down up
it 's the same
you see things through both eyes
i guess i am
just a little
what do you mean
scared
when my money moves i go with it
i trust mr. johnson filled you in on the revisions
scotch is a very valuable commodity these days
mr. rothstein can i be frank
you 're a gambler and i know you 've had losses
i also know you could sell to maranzano or masseria for fifty g 's but nobody sells to those guys once
so if ya really got another buyer and ya wanna welch i ai n't gon na beef
i ai n't mad
i ai n't even surprised
but i ca n't let ya fuck me
on the other hand if ya got needs beyond the thirty five i 'll advance it to you against our next deal on the same terms
could we step outside
i got my partner in there
i can not bear to look at that hideous suit one minute more
four twenty eight
what 's that divided four ways
tommy reina
good pal
better partner
from your mouth ta god 's ear
he 's got a line on the good stuff
we could lose the deal
if we have to
they told me you wanted to talk about this shane business
you havin' any luck findin out who did him
shane was a friend of yours
he was around
lad i 'm a busy man
july 's always a big month for murder
fella named barone turned up just this mornin throat cut ear to ear
black hand
when you 're investigatin how long ya keep at it
it consoles the bereaved family ta see the perpetrator take his load of juice
we try to oblige
but if ya ca n't catch the guys
but maranzano 's got the men and the brains
which is why he does n't need us
bastard did n't even show
he 's hidin
word 's out tommy reina 's goin' over ta maranzano
get word to maranzano
i want a meet
alone
on neutral turf
masseria 's confused
he ca n't figure whether you 're workin for maranzano or gettin ready to kill the bastard
so he 's spreadin the word that you 're goin' after profaci because it happened on his turf
i figure masseria 's gon na try to rub out profaci and pin it on us
then maranzano will have to kill ya
you got men on profaci 's place
we got our boys paintin the house next door
around the clock
we 're gon na keep old man profaci alive if it takes twenty coats
masseria 's tryin ta find a way around ya
but his patience wo n't hold out much longer
how 's bugsy doin'
tommy reina 's hauntin his dreams
but he 'll do his job
you ai n't even a man yet
that ai n't what your mama said
where 'd ya get this funny ravioli
ya ignorant guinea it 's kreplach
no disrespect tommy but why would mr. arnold rothstein wanna do business with bums like us
why ya always got ta go lookin for a gift in the mouth of the horse
i think maranzano 's talkin a hell of a deal
sure frankie
fuck me
fuck meyer
fuck arnold rothstein who 's made us all rich
all so you can be an fuckin honorary sicilian
does maranzano have to kiss you on the lips before you 'll take his goddamn money
if he 's gon na fuck me up the ass
the deal 's too good frankie
what are ya thinkin charlie
a hundred seven bucks too much
any kid who drops an extra dime is gon na be talkin to moliari
ya mean we 're so rich we 're broke
well
mr. costello handles our business with the government agencies
that 's it
i 'm sorry but i sleep better when i know i 'm with the winning side
we 're gon na be the winning side
it 's like rothstein said about that guy in austria
we 're gon na use maranzano and masseria
let 'em knock each other bloody
and then when everybody 's screamin for peace we step in to make it
what they 're fight in over everybody will beg us to take
i thought we just wanted to be left alone to run our business
what 's the matter
i must be going
come on
it 's christmas
at least stay for breakfast
i 'm already late
for what
luciano
i was calling yesterday
something came up
i needed to see you again
same here
you 're sure
why do you bother with perfume when you smell like this
it 's a mask
you got something to hide
it 's too late
have you thought about this
why
you 're the innocent one
guess i 'm too confused to think
you could have stopped him
ya never tell a guy about a broad
so you all make the same mistakes
gives us something in common
i booked passage to london
london
my friends have a country house we can use for a while
if i look weak now it 's over
i 'm very sorry
i did n't
oh god
do n't start actin like a fuckin wife on me
a lot of shit came out of me in the hospital
i 'm sorry you got hit by it
you must be feeling better if you 're looking for sex again
i 'm gon na lose you charlie
it 'll all be over tomorrow
no more wars
no more killin
just livin normal like everybody else
you 'll be stuck with me for good
charlie
i do this for you and you 'll leave me and my guys alone
be the fuckin boss of all the other bosses but we are gon na be our own bosses
come on charlie
we got ta have a top guy
otherwise these wars ai n't never gon na stop
as long as ya got one top boss somebody else 's always gon na be looking to knock him off
and that 's war on top of war
who 'll make the rules
we 'll make 'em and we 'll enforce 'em
all of us
together
we all get one vote
includin me
charlie i 'm from the old country and these american ways get me sometimes confused
you tellin us you refuse the title of boss of all the bosses
i do n't care what anybody calls me joe
long as it ai n't to dirty
and if you fellas get together every year and say charlie we still want you to run things for us i ai n't gon na insult ya by sayin no
julius caesar never took no vote
and maybe that 's why he ended up dead in the streets of rome
you fellas got names
lansky
meyer lansky
and that 's bugsy siegel ya got there
meyer just finished the books
a million bucks
in the last six months
bugsy you and i do n't need to be in business with maranzano
we got more jobs than we can handle
that 's not the problem
so what is the problem
the minute we sell out to maranzano that bastard is gon na have you knocked off
we 'll figure out something
i 'm supposed to be at my old man 's for christmas dinner at eight
we 're going to atlantic city for the honeymoon
i 'll talk to nucky
get you set up like the fuckin prince of wales
i been thinkin
good
'cause every time you start thinkin we end up makin money
we need to put together a meet for the whole country
we all got the same problems
we could talk
meet the guys we do n't know
lift a few with the guys we do
like a party for all our friends
italians jews irish
one big party
course some guys do n't get along
like don maranzano
and if we do n't invite maranzano we ca n't invite masseria
guys do n't wanna be choosin sides
i 'll handle the boss
so we end up with everybody but the two bosses at our meet
we ai n't sayin we 're the leaders but we 're leadin
how soon can we pull this off
i 'm gettin married in six weeks
i 'll already be in atlantic city which is probably the best place to do it anyway
your honeymoon meyer
might as well put the time to use
after all this time i 'd think you 'd know me better meyer
it 's not myself i 'm worried about
i 'll do fine
you 're getting 10 cc 's
i told you twenty
you bastards i said twenty
it 'll just be a few minutes
i need the twenty
tommy reina 's gone over to maranzano but so far masseria ai n't lifted a finger
the fat man 's scared
scared of us and scared without us
same with maranzano
we got ta get their minds back on each other
this fuckin peace is killin us
we can get the war started tomorrow but it wo n't be pretty
who
tommy reina
meyer ai n't anybody ever told you ya look more like a bookkeeper than a fuckin mobster
what 's your problem
it 's just that maranzano 's the only bastard i ever heard brag about gettin audited by the irs
he came out clean so he thinks his shit do n't stink
is there a fuckin point comin up anytime soon
seein he loved the experience so much i think we outta give him the pleasure again
we got exactly two choices maranzano or masseria
they do n't give a shit about us
what you mean
tommy ai n't done nothin'
maranzano will think masseria ordered the hit and wo n't have no choice but to start the war
why 's it got ta be tommy
masseria wo n't have any choice but to trust you
and as long as we keep the boss alive maranzano ca n't win without you
we 're gon na change it bugs
once we get rid of the dons the commission 's gon na rule
no more wars
no more vendettas
no more boss of all the bosses
yeah
and no more tommy reina
if ever i need a boss joe
yeah
yeah
i bet ya feed maranzano that same line
i like that
whatta ya mean boss
ya piss like a man
i 'm glad ya come
what 's with the banquet
this is supposed to be a private meet
it 's only us and sonny
hey sonny
come on out
you boys carryin pieces
you tryin ta tell me something
i do n't come to a meet with a weapon unless it 's with an enemy
see if these two are my friends
you 're a smart boy charlie but there 's somethin' you ai n't learned yet
a man needs a family
i know
when the storm hits it do n't pay to be caught outside
i got a place for you
in my family
or in the cemetery
never threaten me boss
where we headed
wassa matter mr. big shot
do n't have time for my business no more
boss i got all the time you need
i know about you
and what went on your little party in atlantic city
i got ears
that little party 's gon na make you a lotta money
money don't mean shit
did n't know you felt that way
you and vito are gon na pull that payroll job
right now
you got ta plan these things
and i got it all planned
if i wanted ta kill ya i woulda done it long ago
it 's not like you ai n't given me reason
i 'm still the boss of all the bosses
and you 'll do what i say
so tell me when i ai n't done it
how can i trust you when you look at me like that
you got no fuckin choice
you might be able to stay alive but you 're never gon na win the war from these fuckin rat holes
tell me charlie
please
why should i go against you boss
nobody can handle this business like you
maranzano'll never know the crap that you forget
he 's got no business bein boss
the idea makes me wanna puke
you 're the boss an it 's gon na stay that way
what are ya thinkin
joe profaci
carlo gambino
vinnie mangano
joe bananas
they all got ta die
you ca n't fuck with them
they 're heads of families
they 're friends of our enemy
take one of 'em out and they 'll all line up against us
not if they all die at once
every successor will owe his loyalty to us
together we take out maranzano and each family gets a piece of his operation
a mother fuckin peace conference
we got ta talk in private
i got a friend in coney island who 's gon na open his restaurant just for us
but that 's an hour 's drive
lobster fra diavolo
spaghetti with red clam sauce
antipasto
and pastry that 'll make you wanna go home and slap your sweet mama
ya did good
i ai n't seen the boss so happy in weeks
look at this boy
he hardly eats
like that fella killed caesar
one move pardner and you 're a dead man
you ca n't kill me
you gave your word charlie
so
i 'll get bugs ta do it
don maranzano
welcome
i 've heard so much about this club of yours
i had to come and see
good liquor draws a good crowd
i must know more of you my son
not a lot ta know
then perhaps you need to know me
don i 'd be honored
salvatore
my young caesar
first me sallie
then you
the name 's charlie
mussolini is raping sicily like every roman before him
so our brothers are coming to america
soldiers willing to fight and die
men who know the meaning of honor
don you talk about honor but you mean vendetta
killin an more killin until nobody can remember how it all started
and how many soldiers do you have
i 've got friends
i have six hundred
soldiers
and more every week off the boat
an masseria 's got seven hundred
he 's an animal
he 's the boss of all the bosses and i respect him
the internal revenue came to my offices
i turned over all my ledgers
they found nothing
charlie i am a businessman
sittin around gives me the piles
you got a proposition
conditions have changed
some people have become too powerful
i 'll take care of the boss
if you give him the chance lansky will betray you like judas
i do n't fuck my partners
no worry charlie
i will kill them for you
no one will know
at first it will hurt you
but you will come to understand and we will be strong together
you 're fuckin crazy
you 're all fuckin crazy
even the beasts of the earth know who rightfully reigns
they do what i tell 'em
salvatore
always holding himself above
you and me both
sal va to re
we must be friends charlie
keep my terms and i wo n't be your enemy
the terms will be mine
the guy doin' the job names the price
if you do n't like it you can kill masseria yourself
i will be the boss of all bosses
what makes you think i give a damn about that sicilian crap
tell it to the calabrian
tell it to the jews
you disrespect our tradition
boss we got our own tradition
we call it treatin your friends right and not bein a pig for every scrap of glory
forget it
that 's past
no matter what you say to me salvatore you are my bambino
why did n't you tell me that maranzano had made you an offer
i turned him down flat
bring order out of chaos
if you lead
they 'll follow
and what do you want out of this
a peaceful and prosperous retirement
know somethin'
this stuff 's just kick the can on ponies
shuddup
wanna know what i think
spare us
i think these rich shits -- no offense bobby -- are so dead below the waist that they got ta ride around all day swingin at each other ta get their broads hot
those fucks ca n't leave each other alone
maranzano and masseria ai n't gon na be satisfied until one of 'em starts a war
let 'em kill each other off
why should we care
there wo n't be any way to stay out of it
where 's the stiff
come on
be polite
sorry charlie
i got ta get my johnson worked tonight
jesus
hell
it 's been four days
forget it
fuck 'em
johnson 's still on board
even maranzano wo n't screw with nucky in atlantic city
but everywhere else we got nothing but problems
i 'll knock 'em in charlie
i can do it
blow his fuckin head off
get rid of the bastard for good
you would n't live out the week
masseria 's scared
he might make our deal
we ca n't sell out to those guys
they ai n't businessmen
everybody 's talkin about ya charlie
first time anybody ever got took for a ride and lived
guess i 'm just lucky
that 's just what they 're calling ya pal
lucky luciano
i 'm a hard guy
i done more jobs than alla you combined
and i never said no
not once
but dammit i do n't understand why the hell we got ta kill our friends
because the world ai n't big enough for the dons
so we got ta choose between our friends and ourselves
it ai n't the way i 'd make the world but that 's the way it is
yes
i 'm comin for my twenty thousand
luciano is dead
open a window
every newsboy in town 's screamin about it
what a cozy little scene
kill them
kill them
what 's it worth to ya boss
anything
anything ai n't a very hard number
one hundred thousand
no
three hundred thousand
now that 's a hard number
jeez bugsy
ya like ta scared the crap outta me
just wanted ta say hello
know something tommy
you 're a mensch
that a jew compliment
best we got
awww
deep down i 'm a bastard but when ya got eight kids ya ca n't make enemies
guess so
ya got a minute
i got somethin' for ya
take any one ya like
kinda early for christmas bugs
a jew 's got ta let his heart tell him when ta give his presents
you 're fuckin crazy
but only on purpose tommy
this is nice
i mean it
who did this
stu
that was right about the time we met
when he first came in to the sleep lab
yeah
before your time
jesus honey
he always joked about you u curing</u him but i never realized what you cured him u from</u>.
he had n't gotten a good night 's sleep in years
the nightmares would wake him up and he 'd start right in painting
i></i that boy looked like pluperfect hell
how do you get from u here</u to u there</u
switch hands
what
i 'm serious
it was bicameral disjunction right brain and left brain out of balance
he was a rightie so i made him switch the pencil to his left hand
just to see what 'd come out
monkeybone
left handed he was u funny</u>. he 'd been doing all this scary intense work
then he found out he could draw this stuff and make me laugh and he liked that
i></i and then the nightmares just
stopped
wow two guys in the same brain
which one did you fall in love with
what 's the maximum safe dose
most we 've ever used is half a cc
five cc 's
the thing is i 'm responsible for the way he 's acting
it 's the nightmare juice
it 's got to be
julie that stuff probably saved his life
i ca n't explain this alice but i 'm not so sure it did
it 's as if
he 's u not stu</u any more
the stu i love is gone
i></i he spends all his time in the garage
he says he's
autographing
4/17 subject when unaware of observation prefers to hold eating utensils
with feet
successfully carves turkey roll holding eating utensils
with feet
they had a case like that at johns hopkins
wires got crossed between hands and feet
chasing me animals horrible
animals
what u kind</u of animals
i></i i beg your pardon
i did n't say anything
i was uh just getting ready to leave
yo jumbo
we got us some kind of u ventriloquist</u here
hey stu why so glum
everybody loves a good humiliation nightmare
three months bull
three months tonight
three months since the accident and i 'm no closer to going home than i was then
aw buck up
have another tini
i 'm sick of martinis
i 'm sick of the waiting and the carnival rides and watching people 's u nightmares</u>. and of course i need not u add</u
you 're mad at me
great
you have every right to be
but we 're both mad at dark town
we 're both mad at hypnos
oh sure
now you 're gon na tell me it was all u his</u idea
you were completely innocent
i 'm not going to tell you that
i wanted that e- ticket
i wanted it so bad i 'd stare u you</u right in the face to get it and i 'd do the same again
u why</u
i have a girl up there
and i never i should 've i just want to tell her i love her
i 'm a simple man
i 'm just doing my job
i u enjoy</u my job
why does everyone want to make it difficult for me
stealing tickets switching bodies
it is u so</u u irresponsible</u>.
death i 'm trying to make things right
take my soul
turn me into a paper doll
but give me just one lousy hour
well you 'd need a body
if it was n't for that comic strip of yours i would n't be doing this
but a good chuckle is darned hard to come by
i></i that one where monkeybone stole the soap cake out of the urinal i thought i would die
coming from you that 's quite a compliment
i de nada</i>. now come here
bend over
before i change my mind
bend over
death
i dress up when i want to make an impression
so how 'd it go
fine thanks
saw my girl said goodbye everything 's gon na be okay
i></i i guess i 'm yours now
hey
where 's monkeybone
back in your head where he belongs
i></i no offense stu but on your own you 're kinda vanilla
i did n't want to send you back without him
back
you 're sending me back
it 's irregular but
i just love that strip of yours
i figure i 'll take the family circus guy instead
death
thank you
thank me next time you see me
vital signs have stabilized
that 's good
can you give us a realistic sense of my brother 's chances
he 's held on this far
we ca n't do much but wait and see
but these
machines are what 's keeping him alive is that right
what 's the matter
i think it 's a pig hair
i></i how much is mcdonald 's offering
less
oh here 's something
the city zoo is kicking off a fund raising campaign
they wonder if you 'd be willing to appear at a benefit
how much
well nothing
it 's a benefit
but we could probably get u people</u and u entertainment tonight</u to cover it
i get it
we could give the public the impression that we were doing something
charitable
brilliant
and last
you remember bill here from the bazoom toy company
he 's got a little something i think you 'll like
you 're really gon na pop the question
got the ring
got the airline tickets
soon as they break that piata we 'll grab a cab and it 's off to the land of palm trees and coconuts
i ca n't believe you
you used to hate being the center of attention
now you 're proposing in public at a benefit
yeah i was thinking
i mean i 'm a celebrity now do i really want to get married
but on the other hand if you 're married they ca n't testify against you
sorry julie wo n't be a minute
now stu i know you do n't like the idea but you really ought to talk to these guys
julie and i we were just gon na go
go
there 's a potload of money here pal
you got three major toy companies
you got the guys from burger god over here
burger god
the ones that found the pig hair in the french fries
never proven
they 're ready to pop for a pre- emptive endorsement
kids love burger god
herb it 's too much
it 's all out of hand
do you know what kind of opportunity you have here
you got ta u strike</u>. i 'm talking mansions
lamborghinis
champagne for mouthwash when you brush your teeth
i do n't want to be rich
it 's just a trap
being rich is u not a trap</u>. that is a dirty lie perpetuated by rich people to keep the failures from killing them
herb
u i have to go</u>.
why
i got the ring
i></i tonight 's the night herb
tonight 's the night
oh my god
you're proposing
my life was totally crappy herb and she
fixed it
she made me happy
which i 'd never been
she loves me the way i am u right now</u>. i></i i do n't want everything to change
i do n't want her saying yes to some big success
i just want her saying yes to me
... in some weird way i respect that
so here 's my idea
we do a giveaway at the zoo benefit
we get a big piata
we fill it with monkeybone dolls u hundreds</u of 'em
a piata
that 's a u great</u idea
you know julie even if this works which it probably wo n't that stuff is tricky
you do n't know what it 'll do to his brain
what 'll it do if they pull the plug
the nightmare juice
it 's gone
somebody switched it for a beaker of grape kool aid
kool aid
but who 'd would want to
wait a minute
stu miley right
boys and girls
mr. stu miley in the u house</u
i></i this is an u honor</u>. we see a lot of nightmares down here but yours are like u caviar</u man
you da u shits</u
mr. hypnos i saw a dream
my girlfriend was having it
she dreamed they were pulling the plug on me
she was watching me u die</u>.
uh huh
and
well i have to get a message to her
i have to let her know i 'm u okay</u>. until i can get out of here
kid did n't they tell you about this party
tell me what
it 's a special kind of party
a u farewell</u party
do you
get what i 'm saying
farewell
you mean you mean i 'm
i think i
i'm about to
am i mistaken or do n't i get to
is there some
y'see stu as i understand it you made this pact with your sister
no life support
besides julie wouldn't
she'd never
actually stu julie does n't get to decide
that 's why she was having the nightmare
i></i they 're pulling the plug at nine am
nine am
but that 's u twelve hours</u>.
stu i like you personally i admire your work but i 'm just the god of sleep
this is death 's bailiwick
maybe you could talk to death
me
u me</u go crawling to death
my friend it will be a cold cold day in las vegas nevada before i go crawling to u that</u piece of
now death is not what you would call a people person like me
death is a u putz</u and i should know
i 'm his little brother
you 're death 's u brother</u
oh yeah
mr. by the book stick up the ass my- way or the highway death
believe me over the course of eternity you get pretty damned tired of u that</u schtick
i></i so i need a job
he sticks me in this broke down amusement park with a buncha animals to run it
i 'm supposed to be u grateful</u
no
don't you understand
he 's got my e ticket
he 's got my
sorry stu
it 's all part of the deal
we 've got u big plans</u for that body of yours
sorry steve maybe next time
and how 's our new guest settling in
you set me up
easy pal
i was coming to congratulate you
it ai n't easy snatching one of those e tickets
steve here was the last guy to pull it off and that musta been what 25 years ago
why 'd you do it
what 'd i ever do to you
it 's simple stu
we need nightmares lots of 'em
so whenever we can swing it we send a guy up to stimulate the flow
a u nightmare maker</u
like steve here
poe
rasputin
we've been doing this all the way back to atilla and genghis khan
but u why me</u
why 'd you pick on u me</u
the monkey of course
it was his idea
monkeybone
nobody wants to be a sidekick stu
so one day he comes to us he 's got a proposition
we help him get your body
in return he gives us all the nightmares we want
you 're nuts
i 'm a comic strip artist
what 's he gon na do draw u really scary cartoons</u
oh no no no
y'see stu as it happens that girlfriend of yours figured out the chemical basis of bad dreams
and she just whipped up a big old batch of nightmare juice
oh baby i ca n't believe you 're back
home sweet home huh
actually i was expecting something a little swankier
how much loot does old stu rake in anyway
meaning me of course
i 'm referring to myself
you have to assume monkeybone would be a pretty lucrative franchise
baby
why do n't you just
rest on the sofa for a minute
i 'll be right back
bitchin good cake
stu are you
feeling okay
sure
why
you 're acting kind of
odd
i></i in what way
what are you watching
ohhh nothing
you sure this is
medically advisable
got a doctor on duty
well
as long as it 's okay with monkeybone
what 's this about merchandising
you always hated merchandising
well baby i do but to look at it from another angle
there 's a u potload</u of money here
stu
is that you
where did you u go</u
me
nowhere
i was asleep
baby do n't lie
i know you went out
not me
nope
you must 've been dreaming
you 're wearing a u topcoat</u stu
where are your pants
u well</u miss smarty if i did n't go out i would n't u need</u any pants
now would i
we 'll hop a plane tonight
an island ceremony
an abba dabba honeymoon
it looks so
<u new</u>.
it is new
why would n't it be new
but the heirloom ring
your grandmother 's ring
heirloom
huh
you want a u used ring</u
boy the nuts are out tonight
what 'd that creep call you
he called me doc
you want to leave
but stu you 're a big hit
everyone loves you
they do n't love me
they love monkeybone
it was you who got the standing o. it was you drawing on the belly over there
that was u especially</u monkeybone
come on doc i do n't want to be stuck here with this bunch of media creeps
i just want to be u us</u>. home
alone
i></i i have something i have to give you
ca n't you give it to me later
yeah i u could</u but the thing is if later got here sooner it would be
better
look at this
he wo n't let us leave
who
the monkey
he 's everywhere
he 'll take over both our lives if we let him
stu stop it
that monkey is u good luck</u>. you thought him up and everybody loves him and he 's probably going to make you rich
so relax
enjoy it
i 'm trying
it 's weird that 's all
i never had any good luck until i met you
what if it 's all just another bad dream
